#haer’dalis call me

[aristocraticelegance]

It’s kind of unfair to compare Baldur’s Gate 3 to its predecessors since like, a lot has happened in video games since then, but as I contemplate the absolute cornucopia of romance options …. Like do you realize how dire things were back in BG2? It was the year 2000. Gay people hadn’t been invented yet. If you played a female character you had ONE option: a paladin of one of the Justice Guys (Tyr maybe? I forget) and he sucked. He was uptight and extremely uncool and you couldn’t commit any crime around him. I can’t remember if I actually ever triggered the romance dialog with him because I downloaded the OST years later and was like that guy has a romance theme??? Why?? Haer’dalis, the hot tiefling bard, is RIGHT THERE? Like it almost felt passive aggressive. This is what women want: the most annoying man you’ve ever met. (Meanwhile, my long-suffering gay brother was having to break up fights between Jaheira and Aerie fighting over his character).

BG2 was (and remains) an absolute top tier game, even now, but thank god for the passage of time lol

[thefarminggoblin]

Baldur’s gate characters and their pronouns

My headcanons for the all of 3 people who are in the fandom on this app. Enjoy!

TW: trans/homophobia, misgendering

__________________________________________________

Ajantis 🛐 “I don’t believe in that nonsense, Helm would be appalled!” Sorry, he wouldn’t vibe with the rainbow mafia. Would purposely misgender folks.

Anomen 🛡 “Erm, pronouns? Why do you ask? I don’t have any. I’m a man?” Confused, but would come around with education. Would accidentally misgender folks, but over apologises and tries to correct himself but mucks it up a lot. He’s trying, okay?

Aerie 🎪 “Pronouns? Oh! She/her!” *beams* “What are yours?”

Coran 🦚 “This is your way of asking what is in my pants, hmm? Oh very well. He/Him. I also have a di-“

Dynaheir 🦢 “She/Her. What else did thou expect?”

Imoen ⚡️ “She/Her! What’s yours?”

Khalid 🗡 “He/Him. W-why do you ask? D-do you need to t-talk about it? Are you having an identity c-crisis that I can h-help you with?” Please he would be a “free parent hugs” person at Pride 😭

Kivan 🏹 “What do you mean ‘pronouns’? I don’t have any.” After explaining he would come to the conclusion of He/They.

Jaheira 🍃 “Nature has no use for such things, but if you insist: She/Her.” She would begrudgingly go with her husband to Pride, not really showing interests, but will provide hugs and would 100% throw hands with trans/homophobes.

Haer’dalis 😈 “Oh? I’ve never truly believed in the concept of restricting one’s gender. Call me anything, my raven. Though I would prefer Xe/Xem.” Unlabelled sexuality as well.

Mazzy ⚜️ “Honestly, I don’t know why you brother with all that nonsense, but I suppose I would be a She/Her. But as far as I am concerned none if that matters, truly.”

Minsc 🐹 “Eh? What does that mean? Oh! Boo, tell Minsc? Ahh yes, you are so wise! Boo says I am He/Him, for I am a very manly man!”

Neera ✨ “Huh? She/They. Didn’t I tell you that? Geez you’re forgetful…”

Valygar 🍂 “He/Him. Would you also like to know what I had for breakfast this morning?” Poor bb has so many trust issues but would be respectful. Head canon that he’s also a closeted pan man.

Viconia 🌑 *scoffs and rolls her eyes* “Go/Away. I thought it obvious! I’ve not the patience for your gibberish nonsense.” 🥺 “Ohh very well. She/Her. Now leave me be!”

Xan 🌙 why/me *sighs* “He/They. But it doesn’t matter, I suspect I will be a mere ‘was/were’ rather soon…”

Yoshimo ⚔️ “Hah, He/Him. And your own?”

Bonus: Boo 🐹 Xe/Xem. “Squeak!”

[incorrect-bhaalspawn-quotes]

Korgan: I woke up to a text that said “you’re a fucking asshole.” Why is Aerie so pissed at me?

Charname: I’m guessing it has something to do with running up to Haer’Dalis screaming “THIS IS SPARTA” and kicking him in the balls.

Korgan: Har har har! Guess you’d call that a cock block!

[clouds-of-wings]

Rating of all Bioware romances I’ve played

(Note: for a lot of people anything under 7/10 seems to basically mean it’s crap, for me everything under 3/10 means crap, 5/10 means it’s okay - because it’s in the middle - and 7/10 is already pretty good. Also if anyone else wants to make a post like this too, that would be cool, I’d like to read it.)

Baldur’s Gate 2

Jaheira - 7/10 lots of long, intelligent conversations I don’t recall at all, it seems weird to romance your mom figure tbh but nice to not have constant drama Aerie - 5/10 here you double as therapist and cause some serious character development. It’s not really interesting though and then she has a kid at the worst possible moment. I’m still torn on whether the whole “if you sleep with her when she first offers, the romance is over” was a good idea. Viconia - 8/10 starter of countless puberties the world over, you can’t just agree with everything she says or she’ll see you as weak and pathetic, which puts this romance head and shoulders over most of the rest already. Crap ending though, and a shame that they didn’t make her bi like they planned. Although, given Drow gender roles, that would have meant having to write 2 completely different romances probably. Anomen - 1/10 uncontroversially terrible, only gets a single point because you can make him betray everything he stands for, then break up with him, strip him of all equipment and leave him wounded in the wilderness, which I have done on at least 2 playthroughs Edwin (fanmade) - 6/10 the romance a million fangirls were waiting for. Starts out great, becomes unrealistic later due to too fast progression and the player’s response choices being too good. No one really talks like that. Haer’dalis (fanmade) - 10/10 the best, the amazing, everything that’s good and pure in the world, I eventually started responding as myself instead of as my character because it felt like he was actually listening to me, peering at me through the screen, and I wanted to know what he would say. The author is a professional writer if I remember correctly, which might expl- ahh no wait I just remembered that the canon romances are written by professional writers too haha oops Yoshimo (fanmade) - ?/10 too buggy to finish but great alt portrait!

Neverwinter Nights

Aribeth - 9/10 a complicated, sensitive and ambitious woman gets a boyfriend who can’t help her. Here you - spoiler alert - help your mentor cope with her husband being sentenced to death by her king for political reasons, fall in love, then she starts a war and you kill her, meet her again in hell and fight the devil together! Best storyline of all romances for sure! Aarin - 3/10 all I remember is that he tells you endless BORING stories of his life, then gives you gifts for enduring them... but my sister likes him Valen - 5/10 very attractive but also kinda boring. I don’t really like the brooding hero type. my sister REALLY liked him though, one bonus point for horns, one for “yes, my love?” Nathyrra - 3/10 I remember absolutely nothing of her romance, actually had to check while writing this whether she even was a romance option. But I didn’t hate it either, apparently.

Neverwinter Nights 2

All main campaign romances - 3/10 they were utterly forgettable, sorry I could not even bring myself to finish either of them - I don’t even remember who the male romance option was. I wanted to romance Sand and/or Shandra, but nooo we had to... I think there was a paladin and that brown-haired druid, right? And some flirts with this manic pixie dream tiefling? Who gets jealous when you romance druid lady but you can’t actually romance her instead? Bishop - 1000/10 I hated the fucker but it’s funny how realistic his “romance” is: the developers cut the plans for his romance but couldn’t be arsed to remove the writing for it that was already in the game (lol this game is such a mess I can’t believe the balls it took to even release it), so you have a guy who keeps insulting you and being a general fedora DOUCHE... and then betrays you and joins your enemies because “my love meant nothing to you”. Unintentionally great writing! Safiya - 3/10 she’s one of my favourite video game characters ever but the romance made me very uncomfortable. Safiya seems like the kind of woman who’d only be attracted to a very specific kind of person and the game doesn’t give you the option of playing as that kind of personality. I ended up breaking up with her because it felt like the game was holding a gun to her head and forcing her to say she loved me. In a way it’s a point in the game’s favour that both joinable female NPCs are complicated, strong-willed women who would realistically probably not be taken in by the rather generic responses the game allows you to give them (out of necessity of course - a game can’t give you 100 dialogue options and let all of them lead to different outcomes, that would take 293482 years to program). Gann - 9/10 honestly my favourite canon romance. Male Viconia, moody, sardonic, tired of being objectified, pretends to be arrogant as a coping mechanism (lol), it’s actually difficult to make him fall in love with you, which is great - I gained influence with him once by calling him ugly, then lost it again for saying I was sorry he lost his parents. Would romance again anytime.

Dragon Age: Origins

Alistair - 8/10 lots and lots of fun. Saw him and my warden more as bros but played the romance just because he’s so much fun to talk to Zevran - 2/10 wanted to romance him until I actually met him. Very much Not My Type. Still had sex with him in the middle of the camp minutes after Alistair confessed his love to me ahahaha Leliana - 3/10 very boring, didn’t get beyond second romance talk Morrigan - ?? have only played the game once & with a woman but would like to try her romance one day.

[blackjackkent]

The night is cold; Caden draws his cloak tighter around himself as he sits on one of the beds in the merchant rooms he purchased at the Copper Coronet. Exhaustion hangs in every sinew of his body; his eyes are half-closed, and yet he does not sleep. Nightmares wait in sleep...images of Imoen, of Irenicus’s mocking laughter...

He is not sure how long he sat in reverie, but he wakes from it to the touch of a light hand upon his arm.

His voice, though hoarse, is gentle. And his eyes have lit with a vibrance that would have seemed impossible a few moments ago. That she is speaking to him, that she is touching him, would usually be enough to lighten the load for a moment, but...

She called me ‘my love...’

He is fairly glowing as he waits for her to go on, but she does not speak for a moment. After a short silence, she tugs his sleeve nervously.

Without a word, he gets up, lets her guide him to a secluded alcove of their room. The others are mostly asleep already; only Haer’Dalis is still up, eyeing himself in the mirror and mumbling the words of a play written on another plane.

Having reached the hidden place, Aerie seems to relax a little. She takes both of Caden’s hands in hers with sudden energy, squeezes them tightly, and her voice takes on a husky note of emotion he’s never heard before.

The way his heart leaps in his chest, its beats might be the beating of wings too. He grips her hands back as tightly as she’s gripping his, watching the way her expression shifts and dances, light and darkness, hope and fear, as she works her way through the words.

Love. She said love. She loves me. She loves me!

And I love her.

There has been no doubt of that for some time now, of course. He has known in the way he feels better when she is at his side, in the way her voice soothes him after his nightmares, in the way Haer’Dalis’s smooth flirtations with her have hurt him to the core. He has known. And now he knows she feels the same, and for a brief moment it is as if the whole world shines in the soft warm color of candlelight.

Aerie, watching his eyes, sees the light in them, and she smiles in return...and one hand loosens from his, moves to the neck of her robes and undoes the top button. The garment falls open at the top, revealing the subtle curve of skin into shadow.

He feels his heartbeat redouble in intensity, his exhaustion receding with the headiness of this offer. Her beauty and her warmth and gentleness almost overwhelm him in that moment, and he wants nothing more than to fall into her arms, to hold her, let her hold him, find his way into peace for a few hours...

But he watches her eyes and he can see the fear in them too. She wants this, wants him, yes...but her words say more than she means them to. She’s afraid...but she feels like it is the only way to love him, to be in love with him. So he swallows, tries to calm his heart.

He reaches for her hand again, squeezes it, lifts it to his lips and presses a kiss to her knuckles. His eyes never leave hers, and he hopes she can see the intensity in them, the depth of feeling-- that he is not rejecting her, but accepting her as she wants, needs to be.

And perhaps she does, because she relaxes visibly, her voice softening, and her hand shifts to cup his cheek, cradling his head in her palm.

Abruptly, she leans forward, throws her arms around him, pulling herself tight against his chest. His arms close around her without even thinking about it, holding onto her just as tightly.

He whispers the words against her hair, his eyes closing, and the exhaustion sweeps back with double the force, staggering him with the need to rest. And yet...it is sweeter too, softer, easier to bear. Something has changed in these moments, something that eases the burden just enough to let him straighten against it.

He smiles, lets her guide him towards the bed she chose in the corner of the room. If Haer’Dalis notices their movement in the mirror into which he is staring, he gives no sign...

[naamah-beherit]

I’m killing two tags with one stone

11 facts - tagged by @pardonthelitany (who’s awesome? You’re awesome!)

This is tricky, because I can barely think of 11 facts about myself, ha. You know, it’s like reading your own text, when you know it so well that you can’t even spot the typos. Ok, let’s try then.

I’ve been writing since I was 12 years old. It started as a homework assignment to write a fairytale, which I did and in the process found out I actually enjoyed it, so I kept going. That fairytale turned into my first original story - and the only one I have ever finished. (I burnt the notebooks later, because it was abysmal) I tried to pick up that idea two times already, and now I’m at the 4th attempt. It finally looks promising.

I’m considering learning Russian only to be able to read Major Grom in original, rather than wait for its English translation (which is being released slower than a sloth moves)

Besides English, Latin, and Ancient Greek, I also have elementary knowledge of German, Czech, and Italian. I’m planning to learn Norwegian at some point as well. The funny thing with Latin is that I can read and understand the basic context of texts in most modern Romance languages despite not knowing the language itself. Latin FTW.

I also understand the concept behind quantum physics and most of theories regarding it. Unless formulas come into picture - then my brain decides to take a break.

As a matter of fact, I got a good grade in physics during my last year of high school only because I was allowed to write an essay on black holes.

Black holes are cool, by the way (I cried watching Interstellar, because that was the most beautiful black hole EVER). Oh, and galaxy filaments are awesome as well. They’re wonderful and breathtaking, and their existence makes you realise how insignificant you are.

I’d happily trade 30 years of my life for 30 minutes in space.

I’d be delighted to live in a secluded area with just a pack of dogs for company, without ever having to see a human being again. The area in question is either the middle of a forest, or the seaside. There is also a lovely little village in Norway, called Ogna, where a perfect combination of those two exist.

I’m running out of facts. I tend to get too comfortable when I find a routine in something - the longer it lasts, the more difficult it is for me to break it.

I’m a leftie. Leftie and proud.

I lose respect for people at the speed of light, but that’s typical for INTJs.

And another one, courtesy of @acommonanomaly. Thank you, you’re awesome too :D

Name: Justyna Nickname:  Naamah

Reason for url: it’s a name of one of my Star Wars RPG characters that in time became my online pseudonym

Star sign: Leo

Sexual Orientation: straight, but Tricia Helfer and Meghan Ory make me consider the possibility of being bisexual Hogwarts House: uhm... no idea? Although judging from what I know after reading HP series, it would probably be either Slytherin or Ravenclaw Ilvermorny House: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯  What is this, I haven’t the slightest idea Favorite color: gold of summer sunsets Cats or dogs: dogs. Definitely dogs Favorite fictional characters:is there a limit for this one? Because I could go for hours, you know? So if I limited myself to only a couple of fandoms, then it would be as follow: Exar Kun (I love this guy, okay? He’s my guilty pleasure), Maglor (somebody better give him a hug, he deserves it), Melkor (he’s only a tad less problematic fav than Exar), Garrus Vakarian (THAT VOICE), 8th, 10th, and 12th Doctor, Susan Sto Helit, Kris Hansen/Deliann, Vala Mal Doran, Todd, Bucky Barnes, Haer’Dalis, Nyarlathotep... and maybe I’ll stop myself at this point Favorite Musical Artist: ISIS. Then Lemolo, Tides From Nebula, and a shitload of others. Classic rock mostly Dream trip: New Zealand. Definitely When this blog was created: uhm... 2011 apparently, at least according to my email archive Number of followers: 277. Probably more than half is already inactive When did this blog reach its peak: next question, please

I’m not tagging anyone this time, but you’re welcome to grab and do it if you feel like it.

[lehdenlaulu]

Top five underrated NPCs!

I’m terribly sorry for this taking so long! I literally did not see this until like yesterday. O_o 

Also, I ended up focusing on Obsidian/BioWare, because if I’d started thinking about every NPC ever in existence, you would never get an answer. :p

Anyway, here goes:

1. Bao-Dur (Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords)

I suppose I could name any KotOR 2 character that isn’t Atton or HK-47 when it comes to being underrated. But man. Bao-Dur.

You crash land on Telos and after gaining consciousness you immediately run into this kind of weird engineer guy who seems to know you and calls you ‘General’. General, you think. Yes, I was a General… And it all starts coming back to you.

I try not to spoil too much, but out of all the tragic, broken characters of KotOR 2 (and they all are, one way or another), Bao-Dur’s story and how it connects to the Exile’s is possibly the most fascinating and harrowing one. There is a weight on their shoulders only they can truly know and share and it creates a love and loyalty, a bond that is beautiful in its utter, profound twistedness. It’s not a romance. It’s not even a tragedy. It’s something more abstract, like… a dirge, perhaps.

That got weird and pretentiously poetic, but I can’t explain it better.

2. Haer’Dalis (Baldur’s Gate II: The Shadows of Amn)

I understand why he’s not more popular, in a way. The BG games had a metric fuckton of characters to choose from, and you could only have five at a time (not as your chosen team of the moment, but basically at all) in your party, and stuff like alignment and stats and general usefulness held more weight in choosing the party members.

And since Haer’Dalis is a) Chaotic Neutral, which is tricky unless you’re playing the same alignment b) a bard, which as a class is kind of like a useless combination of sorcerer and thief c) a so-called Glass Cannon -  terrific fighter who’s however out cold after a couple of punches d) kind of difficult to obtain - you have to save his pretty, pompous ass twice. Yeah. I understand.

But as a character? I frequently wonder who the hell even came up with him.A charming, blue-haired, entropy-loving hellspawn on a tournee with his plane-hopping theater group. Talks in riddles and rhymes, bestows avian-themed nicknames on his comrades, is confused by trees and literally laughs in the face of danger. Imagine Zevran from Dragon Age, but like 75% weirder (yes, both are also dual-wielding bi/pansexuals with pointy ears and facial markings, who will flirt with anything). He’s just… endlessly entertaining.

3. Ashley Williams (Mass Effect)

Ahh, Ash. I don’t actually know how unpopular she is in the fandom at large, but in the female-dominant Tumblr circles at least it’s exactly as you’d expect, and it’s not exactly helped by the fact the game literally forces you to choose between her and Kaidan (the sole male LI in ME1).

She’s not a perfect person or even a character, obviously, but don’t even try to tell me the flack she gets is not affected by the usual internalized misogyny running rampant in fandom. Or that things wouldn’t be very different if she and Kaidan were gender-swapped (I kind of think part of the problem is that they already exist in roles that are traditionally gendered differently, actually).

4. James Vega (Mass Effect)

This is partially on EA/BioWare for having so much of his background and characterization exist only in extended canon (for example, it gets barely more than a mention that he guarded Shepard for the six months of their incarceration, if even that?), but weirdly many just write him off as ‘human Krogan’, or ‘random generic tank with no personality’.

And I find that sad because I think Vega is one of the most interesting, layered and real characters in the entire series, and such a hoot as a part of the team if you take him along on the missions. I guess some have a problem with him calling femShep ‘Lola’- but if you tell him to stop that he 100% does, so I don’t even know. Also the friendship he can develop with Shep is nothing short of epic.

5. Wynne (Dragon Age)

I absolutely know why: she’s an older female character and therefore not a love interest or eye candy - and she even tells you she’s apprehensive about your relationship with your chosen LI. 

A huge pity because she’s amazing, but what can you expect from a fandom that treats the games largely as a dating simulation - I mean, people game for their own reasons etc. but I’m always sorry for the writers for trying to do something interesting and different when it barely gets any attention or appreciation. Oh well.

[incorrect-bhaalspawn-quotes]

Haer’Dalis: I’ve lied to every girl I said “I love you” to. I thought I loved them but then I met you and realized I’ve never been in love before.

Aerie: Aw. I didn’t know that.

Haer’Dalis: Yeah, it was eating me up inside. So, I called them each individually and said, “I never loved you.”

Aerie: Okay, that seems unnecessary.

[incorrect-bhaalspawn-quotes]

Haer’dalis: Aerie gave me a book called “Why Good People Do Bad Things.”

Jaheira: I didn’t realize you were one of the “good people.”