#hadnt seen anyone post this so. YEAH
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ferretteeth · 9 months ago
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24HRS in Photos – Erik Kessels
Modern artist Erik Kessels simulates the feeling of being bombarded by images by printing out every single photo published online in a 24-hour period. The installation consists of 350,000 printed pictures. (source)
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arolesbianism · 2 months ago
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I have obtained a new oc and in the process I've already signed myself up for needing to make at least 3 new ocs for his story which he now has despite me initially Intending for him to be a side character for a different side character to hang out with. My townhouse has over 200 characters on it.
#rat rambles#oc posting#he doesn't have an official name yet but he is my silly billy and I love him#also take every him with an asterisk again he's like super new (I just got him today)#although several elements of his story so far have been things Ive been wanting to do for a while so thats a part of why I have so many#ideas for him already since its some stuff I've been wanting to play around with for a while#the real reason he has a chokehold on me rn is that I tripped and made him my 500 thousanth character with identity issues#I <3 characters with a fucked up relationship with their sense of self and what it even means to be themself#oh hes also a magic cat world character because thats what like 90% of my ocs are from at this point lol#and another goop related guy but this time not directly related to every other goop guy#he doesnt interact with any of them or even know most of them exist#long story short hes a robot who used to not be a robot but remembers nothing abt his life before he turned himself into a robot#all he has as reference is a mostly ruined journal his past self kept that is almost entirely unreadable due to it getting soaked in goop#he knows that this was self inflicted and his approximate age but that's abt it in terms of useful information#early story is mostly just him traveling alone trying to see if anyone nearby knows who he is but after going through like 5 or so towns he#starts to get more worried and upset about the whole situation and starts trying to look into some different missing person reports in#hopes that he can find one of himself#he runs out of the savings he had on him pretty quickly though so he had to figure out how to stay afloat while doing his research#'luckily' he meets a man while looking into one case he found who was willing to let him stick around at his place while looking into it#this guy had some investment in these dissapearances because he suspected that they related to his father and hoped to find any sort of#window in what he was up to since he hadnt seen him since he ran away at around 17#spoilers his dad is cake this is still connected to cake nonsense because everything in this world fucking does but the main boy himself#actually has no ties to cake or his activities so thats smth at least#but yeah long story short things get. real bad for my boy after the first few months of staying at this guy's place.#yknow how risa in the future was often used as a weapon of war using some unstable chemicals? yeah guess where that started.#mr daddy issue haver over here may understand that his dad is a bad person but evidently that doesnt stop him from being not much better#currently Im planning on having main boy escape eventually and get stuck in the non magic world where he meets april but that could change#it depends on if I want him to interact with the other stories going on at all or not#I probably wont but I would like to leave myself some wiggle room to let him meet more side characters#like (looks with big sad wet eyes) ginger maybe? please? please april? let me see your sister? that you havent seen in years? please?
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twopoppies · 2 months ago
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I was a baby larrie in 2019 when Louis hadnt been seen with F in years and even I took months almost a year to look into bbg cause it IS indeed an absurd idea. I tried to rationalize things and had some guesses about what all the situation. But one day I thought "ok let's see why the smart people on tumblr are so certain of this". I read Amy's doc, Gabi's masterpost, threads and posts and a lot of info and at the end I was simply speechless. All the lose ends of my personal theories had clear explanations. So much of that material is gone now unfortunately, but that's just what was intended from the start. Honestly these days I wouldn't recommend for new fans to dig in bbg unless you wanna feel angry, sad, powerless and gaslighted on a whole new level. Lots of larries made peace with the fact that Louis chose to give his name and """"raise"""" F as his own even if not biological. There was a clear shift in 2020/2021 thanks to F's lousy "mom" so maybe he did that to protect the kid somehow. It's very weird the fascination fans have with Louis being a dad since that happens once a year and the rest of the time he pretty much gives completely childless man energy..
Yeah, I think that anyone who really reads those masterposts and thinks through what happened can't possibly come to any other conclusion.
But there's really no purpose at this point. Hopefully it will disappear one day. I hate the idea that both Louis and Freddie are stuck with this forever. But it does no one any good to still be loudly yelling about babygate these days.
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lotus222 · 1 year ago
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Okay.
I only meant to make one SJM post cause Ik how certain girls like to tussle
But since the gwynriels and elucians decided to mess w me EVEN THO I SAID TO LOOK AWAY IF YOU GET EASILY TRIGGERED…
There is only one thing to do:
Talk more about why Elriel is not based in delusion — unlike some ships (not naming names, if you take offense that’s your mind questioning things)
Again, I am giving my PERSONAL OPINION. I even said at the end of my last post that I am not the author and I will love & respect whatever SJM does, which some of y’all can’t echo. That’s sad. This is a fictional world.
DISCLAIMER: if you’re easily triggered by elriel/elucian/gwynriel…l o o k a w a y
DISCLAIMER#2: I am unapologetic cause this is my page :)
Also, stop hitting my line with the “I wasn’t going to respond to this but…” or “you’re so anti…” like 1, if you weren’t going to respond, then don’t. It’s not that serious where the world is BEGGING for your opinion. And 2, I’m not anti anything, I’m pro-logic, again if that offends you then that’s a convo for you and you not you and me.
Now onto the main event…
Azriel
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My mans is being dragged through the mud both in the books and online. We say we “love him” but are ignoring what he wants and babes, that’s Elain. If you don’t like her personally, that’s not how Az is feeling, that’s how YOURE feeling. Gwyn has one chapter (+1 sentence) of where I can even attempt to grasp at what Gwynriel’s quote as bible, but again, AZ AND ELAIN HAVE 3 BOOKS. Y’all are acting like Rhys in Az’s bonus chapter and if Rhys couldn’t make his stance acceptable, y’all definitely can’t.
Elain
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Again, I say, if you do not like the lady pictured above, stop reading ACOTAR cause she ain’t going anywhere. To be so for real, I didn’t mind Elain at first, meaning I didn’t care whether or not she was included in any story whatsoever. But as I read ACOWAR and ACOFAS, I started realizing that there’s something so lovely about having a character who is innately good and wants/practices peace in a world of animosity and ugliness. She brings beauty in all areas of her life and I think that there’s nothing bad about being “boring” cause that just means your life ain’t a dang mess (*cough* *cough* everybody else in this book)
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So here is where I debunk all the claims I have grown tired of ignoring:
• #1 - “He hadn’t gotten that far into his planning beyond the fantasies he’s pleasured himself to.”
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(Picture credit: unknown) Get a good look cause that’s what he’s doing at night when he thinks about ELAIN. (It’s canon, so cry to yourself)
So, y’all really think you got us here, huh? So, my man Azriel blatantly admits to thinking of Elain when he wants to be intimate and y’all STILL want your girl to be with this man?
Ugh
Anyway, so Azriel hadn’t planned a relationship with Elain…OKAY???? Did you expect this man to have a map laid out about how he’s going to steal Lucien’s mate??? Do y’all even know Azriel? Like, be so for real rn.
Idk about y’all but when I have a crush on someone, I’m not thinking about how to steal them from the rest of the world, I’m imagining kissing them or going on cute dates. Not how I’ll actually make it happen. And ik y’all do that too with your favorite celebrities so stop playing.
He has a crush. Can you let the man figure out if Elain even wants him to act on it before he plans a 12-step mission on making Lucien disappear forever?
Azriel doesn’t want to force his emotions on anyone (as seen with Mor) so of course he’s not going to act or plot without confirmation that the other person in the party wants that. I.E. why he hadnt tried anything with Mor in all the CENTURIES that he liked her.
So, yeah, consider that point invalid.
• #2 - Lucien is Elain’s mate
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(PC: @shauna_the_author) *sigh* This one cannot be dubunked, unfortunately, because it is true. You got me here.
BUT
Elain is more likely to marry Nuala and Cerridwen before she spends the rest of her life with Lucien.
And it has nothing to do with Lucien. It really, really doesn’t. Elain simply doesn’t like him. Y’all were in my comments like “oh he didn’t really sell out Elain and Nesta, he didn’t know”. OKAY. But Elain literally says in ACOWAR that she knows Lucien as two things: Feyre’s friend and the MAN WHO SOLD THEM OUT TO HYBERN
Who cares if it isn’t true, that’s what Elain thinks and with her in mind, you can’t say that this bond means anything more to her than Lucien having some ownership of her which she doesn’t like at all. She even tells Graysen that she doesn’t care Lucien is her mate (“I belong to no one, but my heart belongs to you.”)
Whereas with Azriel, my girl is practically skipping into his arms; talking with him about her dream garden, getting him not one but two solstice gifts, almost-kissing him, recoiling at Cassian’s dagger but actively using Azriel’s…
Idk about y’all but if someone who was fated to be with me was acting this way with another girl, I’d drop him like a hot potatoe. AND AS LUCIEN SHOULD. He deserves someone who wants him, not someone who, as even Lucien said in ACOWAR when he was questioning if Elain was “worth it”, is shackled to him.
I harbor no ill will toward this dreamy man, but it ain’t gonna happen so do Elain a favor and lose her number, k?
• #3 - Sarah wouldn’t do the 3 brothers with 3 sisters, it’s too cliche
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Write your own book then. Fan fiction is a thing. If the ONLY thing preventing you to see reason is the possibility of a cliche in a book about kingdoms and fairies and magic then your priorities are so out of shape I won’t even spend the time explaining it to you.
This is SARAH’s WORLD. If she wants to be cliche and have the three female protagonists end up with the three male protagonists then let her. Omg.
• #4 - That Gwynriel scene tho
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(NOTE THE PICTURE) Oh, you mean the bonus chapter that featured thoughts about Elain? Not that one? Oh, then maybe you mean the other bonus chapter that featured thoughts about Elain? No? You mean the scene with Gwyn…hmmm
OH! You mean the 2 page conversation about training and why he couldn’t sleep (cause of Elain) and the subsequent regift of Elain’s present to Gwyn. Yeah, I know about that but why are we talking about it? Cause that means Az likes Gwyn? Huh?
That’s how delulu y’all sound. And if I hear another “you’re the ribbon Az”, one more time I’ll scream. THE RIBBON WAS ABOUT TRAINING NOT GWYN WANTING TO SLEEP WITH THE MAN. We are talking about the same girl who hadn’t left a library in god knows how long because of a sexual trauma and y’all are forcing her onto another man??
Gwyn was focused on coming into herself and mastering the ways of the Valkyrie. Nesta meant Gwyn found another obstacle in Az that she would have to overcome to become a Valkyrie. The only man Gwyn was concerned about was Cassian and that’s cause he was getting it on with Nesta. Again, be so for real right now.
I refuse to acknowledge this point until the opposing ships acknowledge the 3 books (+ ACOFAS) of build up between Elain and Azriel.
• #5 - Elain doesn’t belong in the Night Court
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This is the last point I’ll mention cause I actually feel bad for dogging the Gwynriels like this, but it had to be done. (Elucians get a pass bc at least their ship is based in evidence)
Elain doesn’t belong in the Night Court, okay, yeah Cassian said that the colors drown her out, I’ll give you that.
But Elain doesn’t know where she belongs anymore, just like Azriel has said about himself. She’s still figuring herself out and what she wants, so it’s okay she looks odd at times or feels at times out of place. Azriel keeps his shadows out 24/7 for the same reason. He doesn’t let anyone past the front he puts on unless he knows it’s safe to. They’re both figuring out how to live their best lives in their current lives.
I’ve heard Dusk Court theories and others but I won’t even repeat those (even tho they’re so good and you should definitely look into them). They just need to find their place in this world (and Cassian was right, Elain DOES NOT BELONG in the Hewn City).
Just like how Nesta didn’t believe she belonged in the Inner Circle, I believe there’s a place for Elain and Azriel where they can be themselves. They just need to find it I.E. their book.
-
Okay, that’s enough slaying of my enemies for one post. Again, this is just my opinion/theories and at the end of the day I’ll be happy with whatever Mrs. Maas gives us as long as she gives us something.
Act correctly or else I’ll be back.
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starsoftheeye · 6 months ago
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TMAGP 16 LIVE REACTION
here we go again! featuring: me doing a computing quiz in prep for my exam as i listen to the horrors
obvious spoiler warning ahead
Pre-Episode
Once again relying on spotify since my youtubes still being weird
Ads gives me times to set up the bulletpoints tho so thats good
haha not the hello jon reference
titles relatable lmao
Pre Statement
Omg alice actually spoke about her trauma no-one expected that
"i'm alright" babes youre not fooling anyone
"hadnt seen someone die since..." more alice lore? is this her parents?
yeah of course you believe her celia
I'm glad alice actually told someone about it, i was worried she was just gonna hold it in. her horror film survival skills have proven me wrong yet again
alice :(
alice do not manifest that into existence
Statement
loving this girl already
INK5SOUL
INK5OUL REVEAL
they sound kind of monotone(?) dunno if thats intentional or if its just me but thatd be cool if it was
omg we're gonna hear them get horror-ified by tattoos
"whats the worst that could happen?" oh honey...
oh i guess no tattoo audio, just concerning noises
what happened jesus
INK5OUL SITUATIONSHIP HUH???
DID THEY MANIFEST THEMSELF A SITUATIONSHIP WITH A HEART TATTOO OMG THATS AMAZING
im loving the special effects and genz slang
"big mood am I right?" girl RUN
i wonder how many influencers could get away with trying to meet a fan in a graveyard and proceeding to give them a shovel and tell them to dig
not the "you said you were goth" are they gonna start asking for 5 different goth bands
i wonder how the cymatics of physically affecting someone with a tattoo works. like do you have to actually alter the tattoo and it gives them diseases or bad luck or can you just manifest it with the power of gothic tattoos and eldritch horror
im guessing theyre referring to the sea guy in a previous statement who met ink5oul?
oh no poor girl :(
i love the fact that ink5oul takes being an influencer seriously tho, idk i just kind of expected them to be kind of removed from their fans and and instead just totally focused on their craft like some people can be. id buy both depictions tbh but theres something about them using their platform as well as their weird ability that makes them more interesting, especially as im assuming their fans are just like that and arent also following the same powers as 1nksoul
oh god
holy shit
hell of a metaphor tho
this poor girl oh my god :(((
Post Statement
oh alice :(
nice to see sam and celia be there for her though. i feel bad for alice but my samalicelia heart is loving this
gwen what are you doing
oh lenas upset
ooh she wasnt supposed to bring lady mowbray in
go gwen tbh
thermodynamic comedian is gonna love this episode
(had to edit this post as i realised id spelled ink5oul as 1nksoul the whole time lmao)
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cupoftaae · 2 years ago
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Could you do one where y/n is walking to home alone at night and is scared of someone and calls tae or somethingg ? :)) I love the Forever and a Day series!
Hello angel! sorry for the delay in post, been busy offline but im gonna get through my requests now, thank you for reading and loving the series! <3
No warnings, enjoy!!
"why are we getting dessert at 1am?"....."why not?" KTH DRABBLE
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"Hi sweetheart, are you just getting out?" Taehyung sat up in bed, phone up to his ear as he picked up your call.
"Hi baby, yeah.." you exhale, walking out of your building and walking to go catch the train home to your apartment.
The past few weeks youve been working as an assistant dance instructor at a fine arts school. You loved teaching and dancing everyday, but some nights were long, and you couldnt let the students leave unless their choreography was perfect.
"How was work then?" he asked, feeling more awake
"well...we finished the main choreo which is actually really good considering we just started teaching it last saturday. I think they are catching onto it now....but we still had to stay late and do costumes and what not..."
"busy, busy girl" he chuckled softly, fidgeting with his shirt as he heard the tiredness in your voice.
"yeah you got that right" you sigh and walk over to cross the street, eyeing the boarding platform for the train. "I'll be home soon, okay?"
"ok my love..."
"do you want me to pick up anything? Im at the train but I can stop quickly at the 24 hour market and bu-"
"hello!"
You stopped talking to your boyfriend as you heard a voice appear behind you. You turned to meet eyes with a much taller man wearing a grey hoodie and baggy navy blue sweatpants. He could have been anywhere between 30-40 years old.
"Uhm-..hi?" you smiled quickly, confused. You hadnt seen anyone around when you first arrived.
"whos there with you?" taehyung listens in to the unfamiliar voice
"hang on, tae" you mumble, putting the phone down as the man steps a bit closer.
"you look very pretty!" the older man spoke calmly, making you cringe. He smelled of cigarettes and booze.
"oh...thanks, im not interested in anything...im sorry. Just waiting to catch the train" you nod and point at the empty tracks in front of you, putting the phone back up to your ear as you turn
"baby whos that?" taehyung frowned, turning down the tv so he could listen more closely.
"I dont know...im at the train and some guy is just trying to talk to me" you whisper through gritted teeth.
"what??" he panics
"how old are you?" the guy asks, now closer to you than before.
"sir...im a little uncomfy with you being so close, I am just trying to get home to my boyfriend, its very late." you try to speak without your voice shaking.
"ah come on...dont be like that, im sure he wont mind if your home a little later. why dont we go have a little fun?" he mumbled
you felt your heart sink to your stomach as you immediately backed up. you wish you hadn't left your stupid pepper spray at home.
"Y/N?" tae called out, but your phone was by your side as you looked back at him. "please.....just go away" you try again
He simply laughed and continued to step closer before a cop that mustve been nearby came up behind him, grabbing his attention.
"hello sir, mind if I ask why you are out here this late?"
He scoffed, shrugging dramatically.
The cop continued to press questions as you quickly made a gesture of appreciation and fled without him noticing you.
You ran off the platform and back into the parking lot of some random store, picking up the phone to see tae was still on the line.
"taehyung??"
"Y/N, what happened? whats going on??" his voice was fast, concerned.
"I- I dont know, i ran away but some guy was near me asking me questions and I just- the cop came by but im afraid to go to the train again...im just-"
"where are you right now?" he stopped you
you turn around to see the 7/11 type market before you, "Im by the convenient store on 11th street..."
"okay stay there, go inside if you can...im coming to get you okay?"
"okay..." you breathe out and sit on the curb right next to the front door, still shaking a bit as your eyes nervously peered around the street, cars passing every now and then.
Taehyung grabbed his keys and was gone within the next 5 minutes, his own nervousness getting to him. He drove to you, keeping you on the line to speak.
"what did he look like?"
"tae i dont know, he was just older...creepy. smelled awful."
"im so sorry that this happened, are you okay?"
"im fine...im just scared now" you laugh breathily.
"im almost there, ok?"
"mhm"
your feet swung against the concrete parking lot before you saw the familiar headlights of your boyfriend pulling in. you waved to grab his attention, him parking the car close to you.
He got out and hugged you, swaying lightly. "its okay"
you give him a squeeze, "im sorry you had to come all the way over here so late.."
"shh dont apologize, you should always keep this with you though" he grabbed the pepper spray you left at home, shoving it into your backpack as you laughed.
"but its pinkkkk" you whined
"so?"
"what guy is gonna be afraid of some pink pepper spray?"
"hey, pepper spray is pepper spray, you just have the bedazzled version. You spray and slay" he shrugged, making you cringe audibly.
"never fucking say that again" you laugh, pointing in his face as he holds your hand in his, beginning his walk to the markets front door.
"why are we going in here?" you ask
"mine as well" he smiled and opened the door, walking in and eyeing the people- free isles.
You followed him as he darted to the back of the building, lifting up the glass case and picking up 2 vanilla ice creams, then going to grab 2 iced coffees.
"whats all this?"
"dessert" he looked back and winked jokingly as he made his way to ring up the items.
You scoffed and stood behind him as he paid, "And why are we getting dessert at 1am?"
"why not" he chuckled and handed you the ice cream and coffee
"valid point" you giggle, "thank you"
He kissed your forehead and led you back out to the car, getting in and enjoying your late night snack.
"so you said the cop stopped him?"
you nodded, licking your cone and looking out the window. "He reeked of alcohol so I doubt it was because he was stalking some young girl....wonder if he was even arrested" you scoff
He hummed, pondering in thought.
The car went quiet for a moment
"do you think hes in the back seat?" tae suddenly spoke, side eyeing you.
"Tae!!!" you shout, playfully smacking his arm as he defensively raised his hands
"sorry, sorry!"
"one more word and im pepper spraying you"
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tonguetyd · 8 days ago
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LITERALLY SAME???!!!??? idk why i havent seen any clips of them since the tour started because they are the most gorgeous ones in the whole show!! if i hadnt been there i wouldve never known TT^TT so yeah i had to make an exception and include them in colour <3
They are SO HARD to capture on camera is I think the issue, like even when I tried to take photos at my shows? They don’t show up as well as they do in the actual moment so when you have a limited amount you can post I think those get left behind for other things
Also like. For me in Boston when they started they came out right over our heads in the crowd and I was just like “WHOAAAA” (like for real out loud) so I didn’t even try to a photo there lmao I was just entranced
But GOD they are just STUNNING and one of the most clear memories I have. PITIFULLY ASKING ANYONE GOING TO UPCOMING RITUALS TO GRAB SOME VIEWS OF THE TMBTE LIGHTS!!!
Your depiction of them is so lovely though and I’m so happy you drew them frfr
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wanderingmipsy · 1 year ago
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Oh boy... buckle up... I was 21 and on my first first date and it was hilarious and really is biggest "i'm ace" flag I have.
To preface I am terrible at flirting/interest cues so the guy I had my first kiss with and I were already off to a weird start. In the first day we had known each other he had had to stop me from walking, look me dead in the face and say "hey, I like you, I am trying to spend time with you please stop trying to catch up to the group unless you are also not interested" (who had been trying all day to give us alone time as they are NOT bad at seeing flirting). He had also had to, not an hour previous to the kiss, during the date looked in my eyes and said "please stop moving your had away I do not need more armrest I'm trying to hold your hand". Bless this man, I liked him right back and due to aforementioned awkward and clueless behavior it had come up that I hadn't dated anyone previously- remember this for later.
So to set the scene we had been talking books at dinner and he is like oh, you should borrow this book from me I think you would like it. Logical little me was like, oh well I can come get it from your place before I drive home because its on the way and I have been looking for a new book. He is into this, I am unclear on why he is happy but I'm happy to have made him happy.
Post dinner we go back to his place and he offers for me to come in while he looks for the book, I say it's fine, you weren't expecting company I'll wait on the porch (cue mildly confused look but he rolls with it). He come back with the book right about when it starts to rain in earnest. We are standing on the porch talking, its sunset, raining in the most sort of storybook romance way, the streetlights are the illumination, the universe was trying to make it romantic but I'm present so it doesn't last, I'm trying to figure out how you end a date without making it weird.
Into what is becoming an increaseingly erratic series of comments from me he says "hey, I'd like to kiss you, is that ok" (this was a decade before consent is sexy was a thing, he was a lovely guy). I am flustered but would also like to kiss him, I say yes and as he leans in I realize I have a major problem right as his face gets to mine. I have seen other people kiss but have never really taken any time to consider what the face logistics might be if I was kissing someone. This poor man kisses me with my eyes wide open and a mild grimace on my face leaving my lips parted and teeth together. He gets a wall of teeth to kiss and pulls back, unsurprisingly mildly surprised. We stare at each other in confusion for a few seconds and he goes "was that bad, you didn't want to," and begins to apologize right about the same time I blurt out "um what am I supposed to do with my face" (I wish I was kidding but its the honest truth of what I said).
This lovely patient man stares at me for a solid 5 seconds as I melt in mortification and then starts laughing "you really meant you hadnt dated anyone I figured you had to be being polite, which was fine but you actually meant that". Being the dear lovely man he explained the logistics after some initial confusion of how to make a step by step list out of a kiss. It went a little like "um well you make kind of kiss lips but like don't squeeze them together and maybe close your eyes" (solid advice our second kiss at least was lip to lip). It took some experiments to figure it out but we got pretty good at kissing after that.
So yeah, my first kiss is the stuff of comedy ledgend.
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Diary Entry No.30
Hi ! long time no see. Ive been sick and my life went really chaotic i was unable to be online much.
But i miss writing here so im gonna try get back into it ! first things first i might change my theme to something more cutesy? im not sure becuase of copyright n such but maybe if i use official artwork from franchises it will be ok? we will see. Its inktober ! i managed to do 3 days but becuz of what ive said before in this post i havent been able to continue.
Im not sure where to start but my mum came to visit on the 13th? of october. It made me really happy but also really saf when she left. I managed to talk to her about some stuff and it made me mentally realise that i might not have that great friendships.
Monday, tuesday and wednesday after that i stayed home partly sick, but mostly cuz i was scared to see my class/friends. My brain feels so foggy so i cant say more about how i was feeling but yeah.
On thursday it all became so much worse.
Me n my sis went to breakfast and it was the first time in ages we went, on our way in we bumped into [❤️] and [🍃]. Ive been kinda nervous around [❤️] but i tried to be bright and happy but i think i accidently was too happy to see [🍃] and it made [❤️] feel insecure. Im not sure..
I was already feeling really down and insecure and then i got a text message from [❤️] asking if i had been avoiding them. Which shocked me since they hadnt replied to my message before that. OH YEA THE MESSAGE I FORGOT YEAH SO BASICALLY ON SUNDAY NIGHT
after i went home from being with my mum, on close friends story [❤️] posted that they had a really bad weekend and had been crying etc. I didnt want them to feel alone but i also feel like i cant be there for them right now. So for the first time ever i replied telling them exactly that, and that ill support them in any way i can but im unable to be there for them and listen to their problems right now and that im messaging them this so they understand that my silence isnt becuase i dont care but becuse i need to take care of myself right now. It was the first time i ever set a boundary like that and they never replied.
So i felt like shit and when i got that message on thursday i was so confused becuz it said they had seen my message but never replied so i thought they hated me and felt uncomftorble by me becuz i couldnt support them right now. I told them how i felt and they were understanding and said they didnt realise their silence would make me feel that way.
I cant remember exactly but i think they asked if they had done anything to hurt me, and i ended up telling them how ive been feeling left out and its not just them but i feel like its really hard to connect to people so ive been emotionally very drained latley. And it feels like i cant talk to anyone about anything or about my interests and a lot of the time i just feel like a pet dog thats here waiting for a walk, to play fetch etc.
[❤️] didnt respond very well at all. They started talking about themselves and how theyve been going through a lot and it felt like they were disregarding how i was feeling completly. It made me feel like shit. Like i told you how i felt why are we talking about what you are going through when it has nothing to deal with me? my brain is really foggy so i dont know how to describe this but i was really careful with my words and tried my best to make them understand it wasnt just them and that its about me and my mental struggles of socialising. And it just felt like they ignored everything i said and just wanted to talk about themselves so i could comfort them.
It made me feel sick i couldnt stop crying, i was like a zombie for thursday and friday. I didnt know what to do with myself. Ive been there for [❤️] for like two years straight with barley getting any real support back and now that im asking for an equal relationship they are upset with me and want me to comfort them again. It made me genuinly angry by the weekend came around. Im never angry with anyone ever and im fuming.
Ive tried so so hard.
I ended up replying by saying that you arent feeling good and neither am i so lets get back to it when we both feel like we are in a mentally good place again. It felt good and mature and a good boundary kind of message.
But then [❤️] said dont be afraid to reach out when you are ready ill be waiting. if you need someone to talk to im here.
Which made me really confused and angry. i just told you my feelings and now you are putting the responsibilty on me to apologise and reach out when [❤️] is the one that made me feel left out? huh???
i dont want to think about it anymore T.T
On both thursday and friday [⭐️] asked if i was doing ok. I said i didnt want to talk about it but when they asked again on friday i told them a tiny surface level version and they supported me. It felt nice..
[🐈‍⬛️] was worried about me too and on friday when i was about to go home said i could talk to them if i needed.
I dunno its scary being open with people so i didnt tell them anything yet..
I just feel like im going to be a bother and it makes me feel sick like im poison. the two that reached out to me always comfort others so i dont want to trouble them more with another person to worry about. If it gets worse maybe ill talk to them.
My sis on friday kept telling me to talk to someone so i did manage to vent to [🍃]. I couldnt stop crying and they even stayed with me even tho their class started. They make me feel really happy and safe im so glad i have him.
I think thats all the update i have, its been scary going to school but [❤️] has been sick so i havent seen them since before everything happened. Im glad i got to see my mum this weekend it was the first time in a long time i vented to her and she made me see things more clearly.. she said everytime she hears about [❤️] its something bad thats happened so maybe its not healthy for us to be friends. Especially if they wont support me the same way back.
Its so exhuasting.
im so tired i dont want to think anymore..
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metfell · 3 years ago
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OK OK IVE GOTTEN UR ASKS I WILL DISCUSS THE MYSTERY DUNGEON AU.
LONG FUCKING POST INCOMING. AND MAJOR MAJOR FUCKING SPOILERS FOR POKEMON MYSTERY DUNGEON EXPLORERS.
tommy is a zigzagoon. he is the human from the future. he wakes up on the beach and is found by tubbo, who is a skiddo bc my heart demands it. tubbo has his special artifact, and convinces tommy to become part of an exploration team with him, after fighting off george (abra) and sapnap (pangoro).
they make it to the guild, run by techno (emboar) with phil (corviknight) as the chatot of this au. the two meet the fellow guild members: fundy (nickit), jack manifold (pawniard, niki (houndoom), puffy (mega ampharos), billzo (pancham), aimsey (sentret), freddie (sandshrew??? this ones up for debate let me know), and a little half shiny zorua named ranboo.
dream is our team skull skuntank and dusknoir and darkrai, because while i wouldnt have liked it all being one man in the main game, having it be dream in this au makes it so much more premeditated, which is VERY c!dream. hes on the dream team with george and sapnap, and he is an albino zoroark (ALSO I JUST SAW THE HISUIAN ONES HELLO?? YEAH HES THAT. THATS COOL AS FUCK I HADNT SEEN IT YET). he doesnt know who tommy is at this point by the way, but he does know its fun to bully him and tubbo, and so they hop on the expedition for fogbound lake.
meanwhile tommy and tubbo quickly bond, and when they head out to fogbound lake, they are teamed up with ranboo. they become quick friends, but ranboo is not a part of the team yet. we will get there trust me. eret is the guardian of fogbound lake, and is a galarian articuno. they summon an illusion of kantonian articuno to fight, and tommy and tubbo defeat it. eret tells them and the rest of the guild about fogbound lake, and to keep it a secret.
news breaks out about time starting to stop in various parts of the region, and they say that there's an umbreon on the loose, stealing the time gears. yeah. thats wilbur. they all start working together to apprehend wilbur, going to the northern desert to meet foolish, who is a galarian zapdos (but he can still shoot lightning trust me. i make the rules.) he tells tommy and tubbo that wilbur is heading to niki (galarian moltres) in the crystal cave.
before leaving, dream talks to tommy and tubbo, and learns who tommy is. he smiles under his mask.
they head to the crystal cave, and they manage to trap wilbur. wilbur has no idea who who tommy is because he isnt the human he knew from the future, and tries to attack and kill tommy. they capture wilbur though, and dream moves to take him back to the future, but not before grabbing tommy and tubbo as well, dragging them in.
they wake up trapped in the future, and the scene plays out exactly the same as canon. they are tied to posts with rope and sableye slash their way through it slowly. wilbur breaks them out, and theyre on the run again. wilbur learns who tommy is, and breaks down, shocked at what has happened to his partner in crime, and horrified that dream essentially made them try to kill each other. wilbur tells them that the time gears needed to be stolen, to be put back in the temporal tower in order to fix time, before it ends up like the bleak future theyre in. the three of them run and hide from dream and his sableye, and make it to karl, a celebi, who can take them back. however, before they can escape, we meet dialga, aka dream xd. xd shatters the first portal, and dream nearly has them, before karl martyrs himself for them, opening up a second portal, and sending them back to the past.
the three are in hiding now, not wanting to let anyone from the guild know about their presence out of fear of being arrested when time is of the essence. but they soon realize that they cant do it without the help of the guild, and go to phil and techno for help. after they gather all of the time gears, techno and phil bring them to brine cave, which is where i have combined a second plot thread together: crescelia is now also the role of lapras, and is kristin. she saved techno years ago when the two were exploring the cave, and phil calls in a favor from her. kristin takes them to the hidden land, where i decide to make make my first plot difference. because the idea of separating wilbur from tommy breaks my fucking heart, im having karl aka celebi come through the time hole and drag dream through. yes its not as impactful as when grovyle lets go of his partner, and hands you over to your new one. but consider: they are brothers your honor.
the three of them then go to temporal tower, and fight xd. they defeat him, and even though time is saved, because tommy and wilbur were never meant to exist now- what with the future being prevented- they start to disappear. and ill put in a direct quote from when the main character in pmd dies and just. ough.
Player: Thank you for everything [Partner]. I'm glad we got to train together at the guild. I'm glad we got to go on adventures together. I'm glad... I got to know you. I'm so lucky I got to be your friend.
Partner: I feel the same [Player]! To me, you're more important than anything!
Player: Yes, I feel the same way. Even after I disappear from here, I will never forget you. [fades away]
so tubbo returns home, tommy and wilbur gone. he wants to continue being a guild member, and so he forms a new team with ranboo. the two grow close, and one of the pokemon they end up fighting together is a dubwool named schlatt, who had rigged his base with blast seeds. crushing them, tubbo got caught in the crossfire, his body permanently covered in scars from the explosion. ranboo helps him recover, and the two grow so close that they do indeed get married, fall in love, and end up with a mimikyu that mimics a tepig that they named michael.
months later, tubbo goes back to the beach where he and tommy first met, and breaks down, missing his friend. xd (who was freed from the corruption once time was fixed) sees this, and feels regret. he brings back tommy and wilbur, and the two sob, embracing each other once again.
not going into the postgame plot because this post is already massive ill do that another time LMAO
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mychemicalraymance · 3 years ago
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Sorry to post about the beatles but like i’ve never really watched a music video from them despite liking some of the music and i really really need to talk about this
youtube
first of all. very weird to for some reason never think of the beatles tm of having music videos even though  I KNOW they did. secondly its truly so funny to see this being a music video like the production is cool and i love visuals but like i said in my head oh wait. yeah i guess they hadnt invented stories for music videos yet. 
some other things i need to say.
-the utter LACK of ANY performance presence by anyone other than paul
-paul interacting with the camera but presumably being too high to be any better at it than bursting into 20 second intervals of it and then hitting his limit 
-these men cannot lip synch. sashay away.
-nice outfits, this is like if they were psychedelic my chemical romance. they must have liked the black parade
-the video being this crisp feels so weird this looks like it was rendered via the best cg i’ve ever seen. but like they are so bad at doing a video performance here it can’t be fake. also theres no need to fake a beatles video they were notably unobscure
-paul mccartney stankey leg REAL?????
- i wrote this before i totally finished the video girl wth.... white women in grass skirts and fake leis.....  i cant not mention it
-ringo
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leothil · 11 months ago
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Actually I'm taking these out of the tags @nymika-arts because not everyone has the excellent xkit extention that allows them to easily get to prev post.
#see the problem i always had with gale was not that he in any way intentionally hurt prim #or that his want for revenge wasnt understandable or even justifiable #its that through this whole war he was never against the killing of innocent people to achieve a goal #thats really the comparison youre supposed to make between him and peeta and even between him and katniss #that despite the hell theyve all gone through katniss and peeta want the violence to stop while #gale wants to inflict it on anyone even adjacent to those who have wronged him #his first plan for taking district 2's military compount is to collapse all the entrances and trap the workers inside to die #he was creating bombs specifically to kill medics trying to help people injured by the first blast #if prim hadnt been killed by those bombs he probably would have seen that as a successful and justifiable action #despite the fact they were dropped on children and rebel medics #if he were in the room he would have voted yes to holding another hunger games #like the reason katniss kills coin in the end is because she sees that under her leadership things arent going to change #the violence and the horror would continue #just maybe against a different group of people#and gale has a similar ideology in that he wants to see people suffer for what hes been put through his entire life #he would have been satisfied with coins rule #and just seeing the target shift #so yeah like while he represents this one way of thinking that would come out of this situation #the story (especially coming from katniss's perspective) basically lays out that this is not whats sustainable for a world free of #what theyre fighting against #can u tell i just finished rereading mockingjay lmao #i just love the differences between katniss and gale that really come out in the last book #bc even going through the capitol she sees all these people as *people* #while he sees them all as perpetrators #its so good #anyway
Me: *reading a post that makes the joke “Peeta dropped the baby bomb, Gale drops bombs on babies”* haha good one
Also me: you’re missing the point! You’re missing the point! YOURE MISSING THE POINT! He grew up starving. His best friend almost died of hunger. Most of his people live in poverty. He watched children die in a bloodbath every year for the capital’s entertainment. The girl he loved went into the games. Was tortured by the capitol. His district was bombed out of existence. Nearly everyone he knew was killed. Their only crime was being fed up of being hungry and oppressed and sharing the same district as Katniss. All those innocent people. Murdered. He had to take refuge in a district that was bombed out of existence and forced to live underground. Of course he joined the war effort. Of course he designed unethical bombs and battle tactics. He wanted revenge. He wanted the capitol to have a taste of their own medicine. He wanted the rebellion to succeed. And tell me you could live through what he did, and that no part of you would be screaming for Justice and vengeance. Gale is you. You are Gale. He represents a part of feelings and actions that reside within us, even if you don’t act on it.
“But he killed prim!” Exactly! Gale loved prim. She was a second family to her. He looked after Katniss’ family. He saved them from the district 12 bombings. He loved her. He never would’ve put her in danger. He never would’ve put in order for a bombing if it would kill Prim. But coin would. And did. She took what was meant to be a tool of Gale’s righteous revenge for all the suffering he and his people suffered through, only for someone in power to take it and use it to kill someone he loved.
There’s some many lessons to take. We can’t control the things we create. War spares no one. Even justifiable rage and actions can end up rebounding and hurting those you love instead of your targets.
“He drops bombs on babies” is too simplistic of a takeaway and does a disservice to the story and Gale.
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unlikelyempathpruneauthor · 4 years ago
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Tour without You
Summary: fans saw the video of cal singing ghost of you and people think you two broke up.
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a/n: SO YALL KNOW WHICH VIDEO I'M TALKING ABOUT RIGHT? Idk if he was actually crying, but a part of me tells me he was, but idk who knows, but i hope he was okay and is doing okay now.
You were currently home watching duke at yours and cal’s place. You couldn't go on tour with cal because of work, so being alone was a norm you had grown into. Whenever you didn't go on tour you and cal would spend time calling one another whenever a show was over, so he could see you and if you needed to comfort him for anything. He hated when he had to leave you alone, but you would reassure him you had someone that was a part of him. Duke would usually stay with the dog sitter, but when you stayed back home you watched duke. You two would have some quality time together as usual so the small pup can use his energy throughout the day.
For Cal though today, just wasn't his day. Their bus tour had taken a re-route, they got to the venue late, he couldn't focus during rehearsal since it was cut short, from them arriving late. Usually when stress came he was able to handle it well, but you usually were there to comfort him right there and then, which also added to his stress as well, not being able to be with you in moments like these. Fans in the audience and online had seen his expression and worried for him, especially when singing Ghost of you. He hated that his stress would reflect how he acts during shows, but today was really bad for him. Cal doesn't really notice when fans are recording, but a video had gone viral during the concert within minutes and fans skepulating about you and cal. You had no idea of this hence you not being near your phone all day and having a nice day out with duke. Your phone had been blasting all night and once you got home with duke you checked it once seeing all the notifications on all of your socials.You were slightly confused as to why there were so many so you checked it out.
@5SOSUPDATES: is it possible cal and y/n broke up? Could be because they haven been posting with one another. Also today’s performance he seemed sad, especially during Ghost of you.
“What the hell?” you said as the puppy barked at you as you continued to look for something that gave you some sort of idea that was going on. Then MTV also made a topic off of it.
SPECULATING BREAK UP RUMOURS: POPSTAR CALUM HOOD AND GIRLFRIEND Y/N L/N POSSIBLY BROKE UP BEFORE A SHOW DURING TOUR
You were quick to find the resources they were using to claim these speculations and there was a video of cal singing ghost of you, at first it was all good, he was singing good, you saw no sad emotions, but when it got to him harmonizing, with the ghost of you, that's when his expression changed. At first you thought that it was just the way he was singing. But you looked over and yeah you were convinced he was crying.
You tried to first go over anything you might have said to make him upset, but there was nothing, you texted when you could and he seemed fine the night before, so you didn't know what was wrong. Unless he lied to you, which he would do when he was away from you. He didn't want to bother you, but you always told him to talk to you when he was feeling down and not himself. You were always going to be there to talk to him always. Just then you got a call from mali, you were quick to answer as she probably has seen these as well.
“Mali, hey.” you said as she spoke, “hey super weried, but have you been on your socials and possibly MTV?” she asked as you sighed, “yes i have.” you said as she contuned, “okay, is it ture?? Did you two break up? Omg did cal do something because i swear-” she said as you giggled and cut her off, “no we didn't, well at least i think so, but uh, no i called him before this show and he seemed fine, but you know how he is, he doesn't tell the full truth until you get it out of him.” you said as she hummed, “thats true, well are you talking to him tonight?” she asked as you hummed back, “yeah i should be getting a call in about an hour, i dont think he has checked his phone yet, so i'll call you first thing alright?” you said as she hummed and you two said your goodbyes. As your phone was still blowing up, more and more rumours were being made, but you didn't expect to be getting attacked.
5SOSWILDFLOWER: Yall, there are some photos of y/n with another guy before cal had gone to tour, guess cal has a reason.
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Caly/n_stan: i don't think she would cheat though, they've been together for years.
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Lukehemmingsstan: i mean yeah but people change especially when dating a celeb, and it wouldn't be the first time a 5sos member would be cheated on.
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@mikeycliff5sos: i mean you can tell she was just in it for the money and the fame, she never spoke about her job.
You were at first confused as to what pictures you were talking about, but then you clearly remember you were with the dog sitter, who happens to be a guy. He was one of Cal's best friends and he always took care of duke when you were away. You were there before cal had gone to tour, to tell him personally that you were staying with duke, since you knew him and it would be nice to catch up on duke’s behavior. Of course the fans didn't know that, but that didn't mean they should attack you. You were kinda stressed about this situation, especially with the things being said, fans even started to question your real intentions with cal and wondered if you were just after cal for his money and fame questioning your line of work as well, which wasnt public because you line of work was importnatn, you were a visual editor at entertainment company and well you kept it private and you didn't want any problems.
On cal’s side of things, he hadnt checked his phone at all wanting to handle one side of stress at a time. After teh show he realxed before calling you, making sure he looked good and fine. But once he lifted his phone he had seen so many notifications, at first he thought it was about the show from tonight but when he clicked he saw everything that was being said about you and him that you two had broken up and the means things being said about you. He was quick to call you as you answered quickly hoping he was okay.
“Hey” you both said quite rapidly, “sorry you go first.” cal said as you sighed and spoke, “are you okay? But i want to know the full truth cal, you know you can talk to me.” you said as he rubebd his head and wished he had spoken to you before anything, he knew if he talked to you hten these rumours wouldnt be made. “Fuck love, im sorry, we had to reroute the show for tonight we got there late, and rehearsal was rushed and, today i didn't do my best to hide my stressed emotions, i tried, but i couldnt, all i wnated to do was talk to you before the show, but i wasnt able to,” he said as his voice was cracking and you felt bad for him, you knew he handled stress well, but you knew today was one of those days, “bub its okay, just talk to me about this kind of stress to help you when you can, no matter what time it may be. I know im not htere, but remeber im a phone call away, always. No matter waht okay, you call me when youre feeling like this.” you said as he smiled a little missing you so much more than he should be able to.
“Youre too good for me you know that? Im sorry for waht the fans are saying, i'll straighten it out babe, they shouldnt be saying this stuff about you,” he said as you giggled, “its fine, it hurt at first, but i mean this all happend beucase i was out with dukes dogsitter,” you said as he laughed a little, “gosh the fans are really out of hand, i love you so much, youre there for me more than many times i could even count, you know youre it for me,” he said as you blushed hearing his words, he would tell you this all the time. It was true, you were it for him and he was it for you. “And youre it for me too, and i'll happily be there for you, always you know that.” you said as he smiled and jsut couldnt wait to get home to you. After talking for about 2 hours, you said your goodbyes and you had gone with the rest of your day as cal had straighten out with the fans about his citation.
He posted a picture on his story of you and captioned it:
To clear out the rumours from today, me and y/n are happily together. y/n has not and has never cheated on me, for those who know she is everything to me and i will do anything to not lose her. There is no anger towards this situation jsut please, be careful with what you say on the interent, even if y/n and i dont post about us everyday its not htat wer are not together, we like to live in the present with one another since i go away for tour. Usually shes here with me, but sadly she isnt. So again please just be aware with what you are posting, we are human and things that were said towards her will hurt anyone.
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axemetaphor · 3 years ago
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im definitely not ripping off my friend by making a list of au ideas i have no siree //gonna slap this under a readmore cause i. well i say a lot. all of the time. i tried so hard to format this Good but tumblr fucked me up i am so sorry
so first-off i know i already have one WIP AU (Auckland) on ao3 so i wont talk about That one cause like. spoilers. i actualyl have it like 80% created so its likely gonna truly get finished for once and i dont wanna ruin shit
the other one ive posted about is something me and ben (catgirlrepublic) have worked on together its not at all close to done or anything but it's. a fun little crossover. Between jdate and my fuckinuhm. Original characters story “Untitled Villains Project”. the sketches of the comic version ive started is actually my pinned post 👉👈 its like the first chunk of the story, i think half of part 1? yea.
Tldr john fucking Somehow is able t oget into contact with a certain curious scientist from another reality who’d just love to study the Soy Sauce, most certainly not for her own nefarious purposes
John and Dave meet up with the scientist, her name is Boss, and her lab assistant, Toxic, and after a bit of a preliminary Vibe Check where john determines her trustworthy (which Dave doesnt agree with,) the two agree to be taken to the world UVP is set in. from there they stay in Boss’s lab (big old fucking abandoned military lab). John and Toxic are fast friends due to mutual love-of-chaos. John n Dave get to fuckin, camp out on an air mattress.
The day after they arrive, the two get split up, not exactly intentionally; big plot points of UVP are liek. Fueled by Boss sending Toxic to go fetch her “research materials,” which are usually important artifacts
Fuckin side note i guess i have to explain my dumb bullshit: Boss’s, uh, field of expertise so to speak is actually fckin, basically the scientific study of magic and superpowers n shit like that. This shit’s all real in that world. Toxic’s got fuckin superpowers, so do 4 other main characters, whatever. It’s got a bit to do with spirituality, iss Boss’s hypothesis. So she has Toxic fetch important artifacts that might have “energies” to them. The thing is actually way more fuckin complictated than that, this is just Boss’s initial hypothesis.
Motherfucking anyways. So Boss gives Toxic a job to do, and John get excited about how Cool that sounds, and ends up going with Toxic, leaving Boss and Dave alone. Neither is thrilled about this. But Dave and Boss get to have a bit of conversation (while Toxic and John are off bonding and having a good time) and come to a… mutual grudging understanding of some kind. They still dont like each other though lmao
Theres gonna be deeper shit going on but we havent sorted it out yet/tbh havent like Written For It in a while but i still like thinking about it a lot lol
Also pretty sure our endgame is john and dave steal toxic and bring them back with em lmao boss is kind of not nice and toxic would most certainly be better off in Undisclosed. Actually theyd fucking love it. Theyd become a local cryptid im sure. Undisclosed’s mothman is a teleporting spike baby.
I have. Another crossover AU that i might. Post something about for halloween? Maybe? If i have it finished?
Crosses over into, you guessed it, another one of my original-character projects. God, am i vain or something?
I promise this is just because i think blue and dave should get to team up to beat up some monsters
Quick briefing on my fuckinuh. Original character story, this one doesnt have a name (yet? Idk lol my work never actually goes anywhere sso who gives a shit). It centers around two grim reapers, Red (26, bi woman) and Blue (22, aroace agender asshole). In this reality or whatever, grim reapers function kind of like low-level office workers. They get told who’s going to die + when by some middle-management types, and upper management only involve themselves when punishment needs to be doled out. These Higher-Ups can be seen as analogous to Korrok; they’re decidedly not human, never were, and fucking terrifyingly powerful. Additionally, grim reapers are sort of .. designed to be “background noise” people. In reality theyre supernatural beings and, uh, look Real Fuckin Weird (the whole deal has a neon aesthetic im terrible at drawing uwu) but most humans just perceive them like extras in a movie. A body’s there but the camera’s not focused on it.
To the narrative: the shit starts when Red n Blue get relocated to Undisclosed. Relocation is something that just happens every now and then to reapers; they usually work in teams, but they get split up into different cities to avoid any strong bonds forming (a counter-union strategy from the Higher-Ups).
Red, Blue, John and Dave end up running into each other for the first time in a McDonalds where John n Dave are getting some 4am “hey, we just survived another horrific monster fight” celebration burgers. John and Dave are the only two people who can see how… strange Red and Blue are. Nobody else notices.
John unintentionally pisses Blue off, leading to Blue whacking him upside the head with a dildo bat. They all four get kicked out of McDonald’s. Dave and Red both are less than thrilled
Blue and John end up resolving their differences, somehow. Red and Dave briefly bond over their dumbass best friends being, well, dumbasses. They all part ways amicably.
somehow-or-other (idk yet) they end up running into each other a few more times, and eventually john invites them over to his place, and the four (plus Amy now!) get to know each other a little better
while there, Blue gets a text about some guy who's gonna die and John offers to drive them to where that's gonna go down. they take him up on the offer and get to have a bit of one-on-one conversation
after that ordeal though Blue has had Enough of people and bails, leaving John to head home alone
theres a sort of mirror-development going on with the five of em. Red, John, and Amy would all like everyone to get along, though theyre a bit tentative about it (John moreso than the other two, actually, jsut cause. well Red n Blue could still be Sauce Monsters). Dave and Blue on the other hand do Not like people enough for this shit, and Dave's not unconvinced theyre Sauce Monsters. he will not trust them until proven he should
the story's kinda nebulous but i got an idea for some Shit going down that involves both Sauce Monsters and also the Higher-Ups to have some fuckin absolute chaos go down.
Oops! All Trans
Everybody is transgender. Everyone
Ive actually workshopped this one both with ben (catgirlrepublic) and ghost (ghost-wannabe) lmao its a fun lil concept ive had from the get-go cause i mean. What’s an internet tran gonna do other than hit all their favourite media with the Everyone’s Trans beam
Dave transitioned post-high school and faked his death for it. People go missing in Undisclosed all the damned time, after all. He moved to the next city over, transitioned fully, then came back as a completely new man. Yes i know this doesnt exactly fit with the “everyone knows David from high school” thing alright, hush.
Anytime anyone brings up John’s old best friend (pre-transition Dave) John throws an entire fit like an overdramatic grieving widow. Full-on sobbing “why would you bring her up?! I miss her so much—” to the point that people just stop bringing up because Jesus Christ That Sure Is Uncomfortable KJHGFDS.
This is a scheme he and Dave came up with prior to Dave leaving, though Dave hadnt exactly anticipated John putting on this much of a performance about it— but it’s stopped Dave from ever having tto hear his deadname again, so hey.
Amy transitioned sometime in middle school/early high school. Her family was super supportive and loved her a ton and most people just know her as Amy. she was super shy her whole life really so. Yeah. people just dont think to bring it up lmao also i Feel Like big jim would absolutely wallop anyone who gave her trouble of any kind
John’s nonbinary (genderfluid specifically) and not exactly Interested in transitioning ? like hes fine with how he is. mostly.
he came out to Dave in high school but hes not out to anyone else exactly. Maybe his bandmates. Probably any other trans person in Undisclosed knows, too, cause theyre safe to tell lmao. Johns mostly a “he/him out of convenience” kinda nb who’s cool with any pronouns but does prefer they/them most. Dave and Amy use they/them when the trio are alone
Also this is a totally self-indulgent caveat that i think would be great, Dave’s actually agender but because he's transmasc and transitioned when he thought there were really only two options, and being Boy at least felt less weird than being Girl, he just kind of assumed he was a dude. It’s only through a lot of (like fucking years and years hes probably in his 30s/40s when he puts 2 and 2 together on this one) talks about gender with John that he realizes he actually feels like No Gender. Masc aesthetic with none gender.
I Just Think It’d Be Neat Is All Okay
Also Amy came out to Dave about being trans early on in them seeing each other and his response was to get very nervous before blurting out “me too” and then just being too embarrassed to talk about it for the rest of the day. Hes got a lot of hangups on talking about it actually it takes years for him to get comfortable in that
by contrast when Amy comes out to John about it his response is to yell “EYYY ME TOO” and give her a big ol hug lmao
I think itd be neatt if Amy ran a like. Transfem help/advice blog on tumblr. Kind of helped-with by John who can give her transfem nb insight for certain asks. I also just think that would be neat.
Cowboy AU - i put this one last cause its got drawings to it actually. Theyll be at the bottom
Basically just. Hey you ever watched a western. I think they look neat
This is another one me n ben have come up with lol
The soy sauce and all that shit still exist, im not sure where korrok fits in yet but ill figure it out
Theres no real like solid narrative yet ? but heres the barebones of everybody’s arcs.
John
Johns an absolute troublemaker, Of Course. Hes wanted in several towns for absolutely stupid shit. Hes a loner who shows up, causes chaos, gets drunk, does some drugs, runs away if people get too mad at him
He definitely had the same kind of deal with the soy sauce as in canon— he was at some kind of party, somebody offered it, he took it cause why the fuck wouldnt he, now he can see monsters and shit
Hes kind of a mooch also. Like. dont let him stay in your barn man he’ll never fucking leave and drink all your booze.
He runs into Dave when they happen to just, cross paths in the same town. the bullshit John stirs up ends up involving Dave in a way that makes it seem like it's his fault too, and they both get run out of town
after that he just tags along after Dave. hes decided this guy's Cool he wants to stick around. Dave is pissed at first, but not enough to shoot him or anything, and eventually, John grows on him
Dave
Dave also is a loner but unlike John hes simply so fucking awkward and bad with people. He doesnt feel like he belongs anywhere so he just travels
He’s the stereotypical Lone Ranger tbh. He wanders from town to town, solving their problems, though hed deny its out of any moral obligation (it kinda is, a little bit, tbh. He does like feeling useful). He shows up, fixes things, leaves. He's kind of a legend but most people think he's hiding something dark. other people jsut know him as that guy who farted real loud in the middle of the saloon and promptly skipped town out of sheer embarrassment. you know how it goes with Dave
He ends up involved with the Soy Sauce when a snake (not Actually a snake,) bites him. The snake’s more like the wig-monsters, really. Anyway, it injects him with the soy sauce, he fucking trips balls in the middle of the desert, he can see monsters now
He runs into John and shit goes tits-up, as said, but they become traveling buddies after that. he'd never say so, but he's glad for the company, actually. it's nice. hes not used to companionship but he feels a strange kind of easiness hanging out with John....
not sure how the Monster Dave concept will like fit in to this reality but like. trust me i want it in here. I'll Figure It Out.
Amy
Amy’s been living in a town John and Dave end up passing through and she is very curious about these two new Handsome Strangers who claim to fight monsters and just kinda. Persistently tags along til they let her join for real
Her family’s all dead, unfortunately, just like in canon, and she’s been living alone for a few years before meeting John n Dave. she had nothing left in that town to stay for, she'd been fantasizing about escaping on wild adventures for a long time and this felt a little like a dream come true. (Dave still gives her a spiel about how Difficult it is, but really, her fantasies were pretty grounded-in-reality already. i jsut think thats how she is, yknow?)
Shes the first person to react to the whole “we see monsters” shit with a kind of “oh, okay. neat” kind of response lmao
John and Dave fix whatever the fuck is up with her town (maybe that’s where the Korrok shit can fit, who knows) and Amy ends up being integral to that. After, she insists they take her with them because “they need her now” and Dave just cant really say no. John too is very much "the more the merrier!" and hes actually glad to have another person along he loves people lmao
At the start she has long hair but after she joins them she chops it short with a knife for convenience
also she still is an amputee. justt. idk. it was a wagon/stagecoach accident rather than a car accident lmao. just to clarify since i hadnt mentioned it, i wouldnt rob her of her ghost hand or yknow. all of the significance to her character that Missing A Hand has. although also now im going to have to research what was used as painkillers way-back-when, but im betting shes still got, like, her pain pills, they probably had those, maybe i wouldnt have to try too hard there. old timey medicine could be WACK though,
Shitload
Yeah hes in tthis shit mostly cause i liked designing his cowboy self lmao
Hes a kid (like 16, 17, technically i think in those days that was more Young Man than Kid but whatever. Hes Young i mean.) who got possessed by the Worms out in the desert and, by his family’s perception, just went missing!
Hes also a wanderer, but he ended up at the same town john and dave met in, at that same time, and starts following them after, already aware of who/what they are.
He keeps his face covered 24/7. actually he covers a Majority of his self for reasons. kinda want him to be a slightly more horrifying Worm Entity rather than human idk,
I kinda dont have much for this boy yet sorry Shitload
images !
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with some editing notes for me cause im doing a very specific aesthetic with this lmao. i might change some lil details/colours though ...... idk
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im also kinda 🤔 about shitload's colour palette. i want things assoicated w the sauce to be black'n'red predominantly but i think his palette might mirror dave's too closely. also im working on a korrok design i jsut am too busy to draw it now
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shelbyiimited · 4 years ago
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Worth It | Thomas Shelby x reader
warnings: daddy issues lol, mentions of substance abuse, alcohol, age gap (legal ofc)
a/n: this may or may not be sumn im actually going thru but as i said before i seek validation through fictional characters especially tommy he’s my comfort character :,)
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“Dad’s getting married. Got new kids and everything.”
You paused at your brothers words, not taking your eyes off him.
“Jesus, I pity them really,” You scoffed.
“I wouldn’t,” Your brother stated, wiping his mouth with a napkin, “heard he’s a changed man, treats ‘em all well, sober too.” he added, taking another bite from his plate.
You heart sank at his words. You hadnt talked to or seen your dad in over 6 years, nor did you want to. But for some reason the thought of him having a new family hurt more than it should have.
Growing up, it was only your brother, you, and your father. Your mother had died while giving birth to you. The death of your mother broke him, your own father blamed you for his wife’s death and there was nothing you or your brother, Robert, could do about it.
Years passed and nothing changed. Robert, who is only 4 years your senior, practically had to raise you. Your dad only ever came home to sleep and even that wasn’t promised.
When he wasn’t working, he basically lived in pubs, getting drunk or high off whatever he could lay his hands on.
He spent most of the money he earned working in factories on alcohol, leaving you and Robert with only enough money to pay rent. Your fathers ignorance forced your brother to give up his childhood. Instead of playing with friends, he was running around doing chores trying to earn as much money as possible so he could put food on the table.
Once you turned 14, you started working too. Robert was finally 18 which meant he could get a real job at the factories. It was dangerous work but with a limited education, it was the best he could do.
You and Robert were doing quite well considering your situation. Robert was making enough money so you didn’t have to rely on your dad anymore, though the extra money didn’t hurt. Once you and Robert were somewhat financially stable you started seeing your father less and less. Until one day, when you were 16, you came home from a long day of chores to find a note from your father.
It didn’t say much. Just basically letting you know that he was leaving and he wasn’t coming back and to your surprise, he said he was sorry for how he treated you and that him leaving is the best thing for all of you, you agreed.
Now, you were 22, working as the Thomas Shelby’s secretary and Robert was a Peaky Blinder. Being apart of the gang was probably more dangerous than working in a factory but the pay was good and you and Robert were under the Shelby’s protection. Thomas Shelby was eveb nice enough to offer you a job when you were fired from your last place of employment. You really couldn’t complain.
You and Robert each had your own flats but would meet once a week for dinner, just to catch up and enjoy each other’s company. But unfortunately this weeks dinner was ruined with the news of your fathers engagement.
You took a sip of wine and set your glass down, gathering your plate and silverware, “Hey, i’m gonna go on a walk, I need some fresh air.” You said, getting up from your spot at the table and heading towards the kitchen.
“I’ll come with you.” Robert said, confused at your sudden change of emotions.
“No, i’ll be okay, I promise.”
“Ok, i’ll clean up.” And with that you grabbed your coat and headed out the door.
The air was so cold it took your breath away but you didn’t care. After walking for a few minutes, you paused, deciding that you really need to take in what Robert told you. Tears started rolling down your cheeks once you really thought about it. Your father made your life a living hell, why were you so upset?
Wiping your tears away, you felt around the pockets of you coat, looking for some sort of distraction. You realized you had an extra set of keys to the office, Tommy gave you a set just incase you ever wanted to come in early or stay late.
And with that, you knew where to go next. You figured you would go in an get a head start on tomorrow’s work.
To your surprise, the door was unlocked. You didn’t expect anyone to still be there, the office closed 3 hours ago.
“Who’s there?”
His words broke the eerie silence that fell over the room, it was your boss, Thomas Shelby.
“It’s y/n.” You rubbed your eyes, trying to hide the fact that you’d been crying.
“Y/n?” He came around the corner, leaning his shoulder against the wall, a glass of whiskey in his hand, “What are you doing here?”
“Sorry, I didn’t think anyone was going to be here, I just thought i’d come in and get some of tomorrow’s work done.” You rambled on, feeling small under his gaze.
“Is everything all right?” He walked over to you, noticing your puffy eyes.
“Yeah,” you chuckled, wiping your eyes one more time, “everything’s fine.”
“Follow me.” he turned around and headed towards his office, you not far behind.
“Take a seat.” He pointed to the chairs in front of his desk as he poured a second glass of whiskey, also refilling his own.
He made his way over to you, handing you the drink.
“Thanks.” You smiled.
“Now are you going to tell me what’s really bothering you?” He took a seat in the chair next to you, keep his eyes focused on your movements.
“It’s just my father.” You sighed, taking a sip from your glass.
“I thought he was out of your life?” He raised an eyebrow, still maintaining eye contact.
“He is.”
“But?”
“But, Robert told me he’s getting married, has new kids as well.”
He nodded.
“Apparently he’s sober now too.” You gently whirled your glass, trying to keep distracted with the swirling liquid.
“I don’t know, I guess I don’t have any room to be upset but how could he just move on like that?” You finally made eye contact with the older man in front of you.
“He’s changed and everything which means he’s always had it in him, why couldn’t he change for me and Robert? Huh?” you didn’t even notice the tears streaming down your cheeks this time, you were too angry.
“Were,” your voice broke, “were we not worth it?” You looked back down at your glass, wiping your tears.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to overshare.”
“Hey,” you felt his hand gently guide your face, giving you no other choice but to look at him, “don’t apologize.”
You couldn’t hold back your tears anymore, you fell forward into Tommy’s welcoming arms. He ran his hand through your hair as he held you.
“Don’t ever apologize.” Is all he said. He just sat there, holding you, giving you all the time you needed.
After a few minutes, you were ready to let go, the tears finally stopped.
Even though he made it clear he wanted to listen, you still felt humiliated at the fact that you just broke down in your bosses arms. All you wanted to do was go home and sleep.
“Thank you for listening, really.” You quickly stood up from your seat, straightening out your skirt and blouse.
“Can I walk you home?”
“I’d like that.”
You walked home in a comfortable silence, your arm interlocked with his. Unfortunately, your walk was cut short when you reached your flat, the light was still on. Robert must’ve stayed over, waiting for you.
“This is me.” You smiled.
“Right.”
Once you unlocked your door, you turned towards him, “Goodnight, Mr. Shelby.” and with that you turned to go inside.
“Y/n?”
His words caused you to turn your attention back on him.
“You’re worth it. Don’t let anyone ever tell you otherwise.”
You felt your cheeks getting warm at his words, there was something about his tone that made your stomach do flips.
“Thank you,” your eyes softened, “that means a lot.”
“Goodnight, y/n.”
Of course he was just your boss but after tonight, he felt like something more.
2nd a/n: i feel like this lowkey sucks but i just wanted to post something :(
taglist:
• @captivatedbycillianmurphy
• @trippymadds
• @sweatydragoncloudknight
• @tlfshelby1
• @theamuz
• @haphazardhufflepuff
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aprito · 4 years ago
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hello <3 since i got these asks at the same time i decided to combine my thoughts on them in this post. yet another annoying sjw essay from yours truly on this blog 
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before i get into these i think i need to preface why im like. i guess overly hyperfocused on a certain unproblematic base (same age au / platonic canon) for them and avoid the ped0philic content like the plague lol
tw for pedophilia ment, rape ment if that makes you squicky. ALSO THIS IS LONG AND RAMBLY
as i’ve mentioned a couple times already, ive been into the ship since i was 12, back when it was very very common to not only post untagged (nsfw) canonverse content of the two in writing and in drawing but also non con and the like, so you can imagine how bad my first impression online was. thinking back on it ...as a child i found it disturbing but didnt really register how problematic it really was?? (i know, but i also lived in the middle of nowhere and had no one explain this to me) 
skip to 2014 aka me coming back to naruto at 17ish and i had kinda become hyper aware of the fact that there was an increasing amount of people online who had come forward with explaining how fictional problematic content, mostly pedophilia, had been used to groom them into starting relationships with adullts. it was also a time where a lot of people didnt believe these victims, not registering how common it was for minors to be online friends with adults who had no boundaries and no qualms exposing them such content. not gonna get into my personal life here but i was lucky to not having gone through this myself. like... it kinda was my first time truly realising how fiction can EASILY be used to manipulate others irl (and yes i will not argue this, if you dont think fictional media can form and manipulate people’s opinions on attitudes, countries, cultures and virtues, pick up a book about the effects of propaganda media at least once please) 
i, being young, still liking the dynamic but not really the romance, would point this out here and there in the fandom and get into fights with grown adults in their mid 20s who assumed i automatically hated the ship(s) and tried to restrict their freedom of speech or whatever, heard everything from the “age of consent doesnt exist in naruto” to the “sasori looks like a child what does it matter” despite people clearly playing on him being older and experienced. it made me so upset that people were just consuming all this content uncritically and exposing children to it tbh?? not really just sos but a lot of minor/adult ships in naruto in general. and thats where i sat down and thought, i do not want to be a grown adult talking down to children that point out how unsafe the fandom is. theyre absolutely right in drawing these boundaries and calling out adults who defend the uncritical consumption and creation of this content. i do not want to consume or create content that predators could use to groom minors, and i absolutely do want to let younger people in fandom know that i am respecting their comfort zones and want them to have a safe and fun experience. after all, naruto is not an adult show and i think a lot of people forget that!!!! i am not perfect in that regard but its something that i, at the age of 23, am very passionate about and strive towards to.
and i guess thats where same age au was born for me and i have been sticking to it ever since. 
so finally we can move to the first question 
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aside from the fact that we both dont like canon sos, i dont think it would work out even if i wasnt prejudiced to it anyways. in all honesty, 35 year old canon sasori is not a redeemable character to me, given the fact that he’s easily amongst the cruelest villains in naruto (torturing and killing and taxiderming people for his own fun personal gain, never for a goal that served anyone but himself. how do you redeem having over 300 corpses in your backpack that you felt absolutely no remorse for killing). sasori was legit one of the only cruel villains that didnt had someone else pull the strings, which sends a clear message on kishi’s part, who absolutely loves to redeem villains LOL.
being that old, he obviously had already been very manifested in what he believed in, even if it was shakey, to the point where the first crack in that world view (sakura and chiyo protecting each other) immediately had him give up on his life all together. that, in my opinion, is not a man who’s going to know what healthy relationships would look like, regardless of it being romantic or not. 35 year old sasori to me has the same appeal as an expired can of tuna and he’s probably very happy 6 feet under. he’s supposed to be a failed gaara in that sense that he had no one to look out for him and therefore was never going to experience anything but a bad ending in life. its fine that hes dead honestly, it wraps up his short character development the best IMO.
adding to that, seriously, sakura was obviously interested in knowing why he was that way, and called him out for being seriously fucked in the head, but it’s weird to me that people assume she had any interest in actively rehabilitating him, let alone starting a serious romantic relationship with him. sakura who’s not only very, uhm, immature and straight forward when it comes to her romantic viewpoints also, as a big bootlicker, wouldnt soil her standing in the village by starting anything with a disgraced and far too gone criminal like sasori. shipping that version of sasori with sakura intimately is still going to set her up for a huge power imbalance that would be difficult to handle imo, even if she was the one in the fight ultimately exerting her power over him. i would still look at it and think damn she deserves better than having to play therapist for man like that lol.
additionally, even if you ignored all of this, you cant really ignore that sasori had already known her as a child, and that had been his first and most impactful impression of her. i dont think that sasori would look at 35 year old sakura and see her as a grown woman and not the little green girl she was in the fight. plus, you easily fall into predatory comparison territory between the “childish” and “womanly” and i have seen way too often in fic just being boiled down to her now being fuckable. a lot of of ships do this and i would just like to remind yall thats it not normal for adults to want to start relationships with children they have seen grown up or known as a child when they themselves were fully grown adults. therefore, maybe if sakura hadnt met sasori before it would be less of a problem? but that also obviously defeats the point of the dynamic and the reason he died in the first place. so yeah, it sounds kind of doomed especially if you were to make it romantic. 
WHICH BRINGS ME TO THE SECOND QUESTION
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let me preface this that im not fundamentally against age gaps, even if im not super interested in it. after all, colorblind had a 5 yr age gap (with sakura being 21), even if, say, i wrote similar fics today i probably would make it smaller lol. i think it can be handled well if both parties have enough life experience to deal with it, and the author is cautious of where the age gap starts, i think a 10+ year age gap would be fine in a scenario where the younger party (i guess sakura) was at least 25-27ish, meaning she has completed most of her most formative life stages and probably had been in relationships before, meaning she would be able to handle it without having to fear a huge power imbalance. the older the younger party is the less the age gap is going to matter tbh .TsukiHoshino and AngelOfDeath10 both handle age gaps in their fics really well imo, so i do not mind reading about them.
unfortunately, a lot of people in this fandom think making sakura barely "”””legal””””” (18, not even 20 which is hilarious to me because the source material is obviously japanese) because they both cannot stand her being past her “prime years” of being young fertile and fuckable to much older men as well as thinking a 20 year old is automatically old enough to handle that type of relationship. ive seen a lot of unironic takes that believe it will absolve them of callout posts if they throw around age of consent and “shes 18 now suckers!!!” enough lmfao. absolutely hilarious. aging a minor up without aging the adult down seriously reeks of predatory “cant wait until youre 18″ narratives and thats why i find it similarly disturbing as straight up pedo shipping.
ultimately, sasosaku is and will always be a inherently problematic ship in canon, which is why i think it should always be handled a little more responsibly in fandom spaces, ignoring or outright excusing the main problem factor, which is sasori, isnt going to convince anyone that the dynamic in itself is well written and interesting enough to explore in aus, like giving sasori the redemption most of us wanted him to have by aging him down to a point in time where he was still realistically going to allow being positively influenced, similar to gaara. 
so really, what i think is well handled age gap and how most people handle age gap in the naruto fandom are two different worlds at times lol 
tl;dr
canon shippers have never been anything but gross when i was younger and i didnt wanna be like that, even if youre “smart”enough to differenate, actual creeps dont really care and might use your content to blur the lines, sasori isnt rly redeemable so romantic canonverse realistically wouldnt make much sense and is still iffy, age gaps are fine if they are handled well, but given that the dynamic doesnt really need the age gap to still work im not that invested on making that an essential part of my shipping experience.  
thank you for reading and hope this makes sense!
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