#guy's beautifully complicated and heartbreaking

[2hightocare]

DOWN BAD! 03

Synopsis: Despite undeniable chemistry, your guys’ relationship remains undefined, caught between playful teasing to deeper, unspoken longing.

Pairings: bad boy! jungkook x fem! reader

Genres: college au. slowburn!

Warnings: drugs. mention of abuse, abusive household, fighting, screaming, crying, reader is down bad.. unprotected sex, reader is a virgin, making out, throwing up, fluff if you kinda squint, love confession, angst, banter between them both, cussing, Jungkook sucks at showing his feelings, complicated relationship, flashbacks.

a/n: hi.. sorry this took longer to put out but finals week is here— but here🥳 i recommend reading the first parts before this for it to make more sense k bye bye🤍

01 02 playlist board

The aching feeling in your chest didn’t disappear; it only increased the more you cried. Your palm clawed your chest, soothing over your clothes as if it would help lessen the pain. Your heart felt like it was getting repeatedly run over by a train. Each time you would gasp for air, another heartbreaking sob came flowing out of your mouth. It was crazy how down bad you are over this boy.

Seeing the person you love the most lose themselves to drugs was the most heart-wrenching pain you have ever experienced. The worst thing was you were losing yourself over him.

“I want a big house, with all that white picket fence shit,” you say, your hands playing with his hair as he melts into your touch.

“Not happening, baby,” he chuckles, his hand on your waist squeezing. “And I want a ring the size of my fist,” you ignore him, extending a hand out, imagining how a ring would look on your ring finger. “We’re not getting married or getting a house,” he rasps out, a hint of amusement displayed on his face matching yours.

“I think we should get a dog as well, don’t you think?” You continue, making him throw his head back with a laugh. “There would be no dog, and house, baby. Because I will be in jail after trying to rob a bank to pay for your big-ass ring,” Jungkook states, tilting his head to the side to drop a kiss on your cheek, the gesture sending your heartbeat skyrocketing in your chest.

“So you do want to get married!?” You jest happily, tugging on his hair playfully, making him let out a low groan before shaking his head, laughing. His laugh was one of your favorite sounds in the world.

The memory was like a punch into your gut, over and over again without stopping. Him leaving you on the floor of your room crying keeps replaying in your mind. The thought of him actually leaving never crossed your mind until now. He always comes back, you thought to yourself as you pick yourself up from the ground. Your knees weaken as another cry rakes through your body as you drop onto your bed face down.

As much as you wanted to run after him, you knew better not to. Your self-respect was hanging by a thread, and you were scared of what you would do if you see him at this very moment. The thought of you on your knees begging him to change burned in your mind.

You knew love shouldn’t be this hard, but that didn’t stop your mind from trying to convince you otherwise. Memories of him started circulating around your head, sending a strong shot of pain to spread through your body. You try your best to control your sobs, but it is almost useless as sixteen-year-old Jungkook appears in your mind.

“Hi,” you quip, skipping towards him.

“Hi,” he says, the edge of his mouth lifting into a smirk. “Finally, I see you again. You aren't in my homeroom.” You pout, noticing how his eyes go from your eyes to your lips to your body. “That's good, no? I wouldn't want to be a distraction.” He flirts almost nonchalantly, which sends a swarm of butterflies to flap around your stomach. You bite your lip before crossing your legs.

“Do you always flirt with every woman that comes up to you?” You tilt your head to the side, letting your hair fall beautifully over your shoulders, making Jungkook admire.

“Nah, only with cute girls I met on the first day of school in the front office after she got in a fight with someone for ripping holes in her tights,” Jungkook shrugs. You smile as you look him up and down. His hair is messy but not so messy that it looked like he got in a fight. His uniform fitted his body perfectly, making you jealous that girls got to look at him. His tie was tied neatly around his neck—but your mind was playing tricks with you as you imagined him using his tie in other ways that weren't exactly appropriate, but that's what reading Wattpad did to a girl.

“Is that so?” you chuckle as you watch him nod.

“What's your type?” he asks, catching you off guard. Your hands play with the hem of your skirt. “Dimples, brown eyes...” You tap your chin as you playfully look up as if you were thinking. “I like them tall as well. How tall are you?” you ask him, pointing at him, waiting for his reply. “Five ten,” he replies casually, amusement clear in his eyes.

“Yeah, I like them five ten.”

You felt as if you had a ball stuck in your throat. The more you tried to calm down, another batch of fresh tears pooled down your eyes. Your eyes were bloodshot, tears mixed with your mascara leaving streaks of black all over your cheeks. Before you knew it, you fell asleep with a broken heart.

Jungkook's hand shakes as he lights up the cigarette between his lips, his body craving the drugs. Instead of running to his dealer's house, he imagines your distraught face. He takes a large puff from the stick, letting it fill his lungs, but it's not enough. His tattooed hand tugs on his hair-body shaking, which he would like to think is from the cold, trying to ignore the fact he's going through withdrawals.

He didn't dare go home; he couldn't face his mom. He knew he would lose his mind if he saw another bruise decorating her skin. Another chill ran down his spine as he exhaled. His muscles ached, and sweat started to form on his forehead. The feeling of wanting to throw up was almost unbearable. Before he knew it, he was puking over a bush. He couldn't catch his breath before another roar of vomit came rushing out of him.

"It's fine," Jungkook repeated under his breath. Before he knew it, his feet moved towards the only person who could help him.

"You look like shit, buddy," Yoongi chuckles. "The regular?" He raised an eyebrow, and Jungkook nodded eagerly, his hands shaking as he watched Yoongi pull out a small bag of white circular pills-oxycodone.

"Here." Yoongi shoved the bag into Jungkook's hand, harshly taking the dollar bills from him and counting them.

"Thanks," Jungkook nodded, his feet moving to the door before stopping abruptly.

"That pretty girl that's always running behind you, that's your girl?" Yoongi says, licking a piece of paper with his tongue before rolling it up into a perfect small joint. Jungkook's body stiffened; he didn't like the fact that Yoongi knew who you were and that he mentioned you as pretty sent a chill down his body.

"Nah, she's just someone I know from school," Jungkook says, his voice stoical, showing zero emotion as he lies through his teeth. "Why?" Jungkook added a couple of seconds later. A small smirk appeared on Yoongi's face.

"She came looking for me," Yoongi starts, placing the rolled-up paper between his lips while his other hand uses a lighter to light it up. He blows a couple of times before he takes a hit, letting it fill his airways.

"She told me she'd give me a shit ton of money if I stop selling to you." Yoongi chuckles the words out, making Jungkook's throat close up and his lungs stop working.

"She also told me to go 'fuck myself," Yoongi mocks you in a high-pitched voice before bursting into laughter. "She's fucking bad, though. She had this tiny ass skirt-and her tits, man-" Yoongi whistles lowly.

Before Jungkook knew it, he was striding towards Yoongi, yanking the joint out of his mouth and throwing it somewhere around the room. Jungkook's hands gripped both sides of Yoongi's shirt, pulling him upwards from the couch.

"Don't. Fucking. Talk. About. Her," Jungkook seethes, his jaw clenched as Yoongi lets out a surprised gasp.

"Don't even fucking look at her." Jungkook shakes Yoongi. "The fuck is wrong with you?" Yoongi pushes Jungkook off. The smirk he always had plastered on his face is long gone, replaced by a shocked expression.

"Listen here, whatever the fuck I got to do with you has nothing to do with her. I don't give a single fuck if she came up to you. Next time you ever see her, don't even glance her way, don't even breathe near her. Because I promise you l will fucking kill you. I'm not scared of jail." Jungkook growls before pushing Yoongi back onto the couch.

Before he could reply, Jungkook strode for the door and slammed it shut.

Jungkook's heart rapidly beats in his chest. The adrenaline and anger fueling his body has him cursing under his breath. As much as Jungkook wanted to punch Yoongi straight in the jaw, he knew things wouldn't end well. So instead, he walked straight to the house where he knew was the last place he should go.

It was almost five in the morning when a small sound woke you from your sleep. Your head pounded, and your body and heart felt numb. You rubbed your eyes tiredly, blinking fast as you caught a shadow outside your window. Immediately, you shot up from your bed.

Your heart started again as you rushed to open the window. With a small gasp, you pulled the boy inside your room.

“You’re here! Are you okay?” You took hold of his face, checking him frantically. “Look at me.” You grabbed his face and made him look at you. His eyes bored into yours—the small glittering light in his eyes sparkled for a second before being replaced with empty eyes, almost angry.

“I’m not high,” he groaned, removing your hand from his face. You let them fall beside you with a small, weathery breath.

“That’s good.” You sniffed, but he stepped back when you reached for him, as if your touch was poison. He felt distant and gone, like he wasn’t really in front of you. “You met Yoongi,” he said, his tone cold, lacking the warmth he always used when talking to you.

“I did,” you nodded, your eyes welling up with tears threatening to spill at any moment. “He told me what you did.” His voice was almost nonchalant, which sent a shiver down your body. He was slipping through your fingers like water, no matter how hard you tried to hold on.

“You went to him?” you said, your hands forming into fists beside you as you pressed your nails into your palms, possibly leaving red marks.

“None of your business,” he replied. “I don’t know what sort of shit you tried to pull, but never fucking do it again,” Jungkook bluntly stated.

“You always say it’s not my fucking business, but it fucking is.” You gritted your teeth, anger bubbling in your stomach.

“How the fuck would that be any of your business? From what I recall, we are nothing.” He scoffed, his heart cracking in his chest as the words left his mouth, watching your face fall before recovering.

“Why the fuck are you here, then? It is my fucking business,” You said, tone deadly.

“It is my fucking business because I fucking care about you, Jungkook! You might not notice it, but I love you. I’m so tired of acting like I don’t when all I want is you. I just want you. You.” You cried almost erratically, Jungkook's mouth opening before closing.

“I love you,” you sobbed, tears streaming down your face just like the raindrops on your closed window. “I know you do too; if not, you wouldn’t be here.” A shaky breath left you as you wiped your eyes with a sniffle.

Jungkook’s heart suddenly felt lighter, but the pain in his body didn’t go away. When your words left your mouth, his heart stopped, and the thoughts he came to tell you about were long forgotten. He looked at your puffy, smudged mascara eyes and your pouty lips that begged to be kissed, making the thoughts in his head vanish into thin air.

“You don’t mean that,” Jungkook finally said, and you could almost hear the faint sound of your heart cracking at his words.

Before you could reply, Jungkook dropped onto his knees, shaking. It was pathetic how fast you dropped beside him, getting a hold of his body. “I’m going to die, fuck.” Jungkook shook in your arms, closing his eyes with a loud curse. “Fuck, fuck,” Jungkook growled. You frantically touched him; his body was burning up as he shook in your arms.

“What’s going on?” you cried, coaxing him. Small reassuring ‘you're going to be okay’ left your mouth repeatedly as you held him tight to your chest while he shook and whimpered in pain. “Fuck, need this to go away,” Jungkook shook as he reached for his pocket and pulled out a small bag of pills. His hands shook as he tried to open the bag, fumbling.

“Baby, help me. I need this to go away.” Jungkook cried, tears rushing down his face as he struggled to open the bag.

A heart-wrenching sob escaped past your mouth as you noticed the position you were in. It was like a scene in a film. Jungkook shook his head repeatedly as you took the bag out of his hands and placed it behind you, somewhere he couldn’t reach. “Help me,” Jungkook pleaded, his calloused hands tight on your waist as he shut his eyes in agonizing pain.

“I’m so sorry,” you cried, your fingers wiping his tears.

“Make it go away,” Jungkook cried, the most vulnerable you had ever seen him as he begged you to give him the drugs. It was like you were stuck in a love triangle with him and his last drug of choice.

Jungkook looked at you, his face desperate. “Make it go away,” he pleaded. And that’s exactly what you did, just not in the way Jungkook was thinking. Your lips smashed into his, making his eyes widen before fluttering closed, melting into you.

His tense shoulders immediately relaxed, dropping as the furrowed crease between his forehead softened.

As your lips molded with his perfectly, Jungkook felt his walls start to drop, brick by brick. Your hands held his face tightly, each kiss feeling like a battleground where you both fought with your mouths instead of words. The taste of bitterness mingled with the intoxicating sweetness of longing-a drug that left Jungkook craving more as you tore apart to catch your breath.

Heat surged through your veins, a fiery storm of conflicting emotions raging within. Each touch sent shivers down your spine, igniting a hunger you couldn't deny, even as anger simmered beneath the surface. Before you could say anything, Jungkook grabbed the back of your neck, pulling you closer.

Your body melted against his, a wave of warmth flooding your senses as his lips met yours again.

It was a moment you had dreamed of, yearned for with every fiber of your being, and now it was here, surpassing all of your wildest expectations. Time seemed to stand still, allowing you to savor every precious second of it.

"Use me," you moaned between the kisses as you gasped for air.

"Forget about everything and just focus on me." You gasped as his lips shut you up once again.

His hands caged your face as his lips molded against yours. Tongues danced together, exploring each other with an unspoken hunger, lost in the intoxicating rhythm of the kiss.

"Fuck, I should've kissed you sooner," Jungkook groaned, his hand sliding gently into your hair. He tugged it back, exposing your neck to his hungry gaze.

A shiver of anticipation raced down your spine as his lips found a new place to explore.

His head dipped to your neck, peppering kisses all over. A soft moan left your lips as he sucked on your sweet spot, leaving a red-purple mark on your collarbone. "So pretty," he said before capturing your lips with his again.

As your lips molded together, a surge of clarity washed over him, drowning out the incessant whispers of addiction that had haunted his mind for so long. With each kiss, the cravings faded into oblivion, replaced by a singular focus- you.

"We shouldn't be doing this," Jungkook groaned as your lips made contact with his neck. The sucking sensation of your lips had him throwing his head back with a heavy sigh. His hands tightened on your waist before pulling you up from the floor onto his lap. "I don't care," you breathed out, pulling him in closer to you. A loud groan ripped out of Jungkook as you sucked on the nape of his neck.

"Baby, I don't wanna take advantage of you," Jungkook said between kisses as you held his face to kiss him roughly. A sudden wave of heat rushed down to your center as Jungkook tried to pull back, only for his bulge to rub against you.

"Use me," you moaned, your arms pulling him into you.

His head rested over your chest, listening to your heartbeat. A shiver ran down his spine at your words.

"Baby, please," he pleaded, his eyes shut from the pleasure of your hips rubbing against him at a slow, almost agonizing pace. All he could think of was you.

"Look at me," you said, your hands holding his face to make him look at you. The once dull, empty eyes he came in with were now long gone, replaced with a sad, almost yearning look. His pupils were dilated as he looked at your face.

"I want you. I want all of you," you started. He nodded, his face the most vulnerable you had ever seen on him, which created a warm, fuzzy feeling in your stomach.

"And I want you to use me," you confessed, your voice trembling with honesty.

As your lips lingered against his, you breathed out the words, your voice a gentle plea, "Let me be the one you turn to when the cravings hit, the one who reminds you of all the reasons to stay, because every time you choose me over drugs, you're choosing yourself. You're choosing us."

Jungkook fumbled with his bottom lip, biting it as he felt his heart slowly start to mend itself. He was sure when he left your room earlier that day that you would never want to talk to him again. But here you were, not giving up on him, instead believing in him. Jungkook's lip trembled before a tear fell down his cheek.

"I love you," he whispers, his voice cracking. The words hang in the air, the complete opposite of how your heart is feeling. Before you can reply, he's pulling on your shirt and smashing his lips onto yours.

The kiss was desperate, filled with unspoken words and emotions. His hands roamed your back, pulling you closer as if he couldn't bear to have any distance between you. His hands clutch at you as if you're his lifeline, grounding him in this moment.

Your fingers tangle in his hair, pulling him closer, deepening the kiss. Jungkook's tears mix with your own as the intensity of the moment overwhelms you both.

Your lips part for a breath, and in the brief pause, you see the raw emotion in his eyes. It's a look of longing, of need, of a love that's been buried beneath layers of pain and addiction. Without another word, you capture his lips again, pouring all your love and hope into the kiss.

Jungkook's walls crumbled completely as he let himself be vulnerable, feeling your warmth and acceptance enveloping him. The kiss deepened, both of you losing yourselves in the moment, letting the world outside fade away.

Finally, you broke apart, both gasping for breath, foreheads resting against each other. Jungkook's eyes were no longer empty but filled with a mixture of love, determination, and a glimmer of hope. You cupped his face, your thumbs gently wiping away his tears.

"We'll get through this together," you whispered, your voice filled with unwavering conviction. "One step at a time."

Jungkook nodded, his eyes never leaving yours. "I promise I'll try," he said softly, his voice laced with sincerity.

You smiled, pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead. "That's all I ask." Before capturing his lips with yours once again.

You moan into the kiss, and your hands move to his hair, pulling, messing, and tugging. His hands drop to your bare thighs beside him, caging him in. A small whimper makes past the kiss when he dips his finger onto the waistband of your black small shorts you wear underneath your school skirt.

The feeling was foreign, but it felt right. When his fingers dipped into your panties a loud moan was coming out of you. "Shh, baby, your parents will hear you.” Jungkook whispers. “Not here; gone for the weekend.” You pant as you feel his middle finger dip between your delicate folds, spreading your wetness over your clit.

You never had anyone touch you this way; the only thing that has ever come close to your center were your fingers, but as he enters one of his digits, it makes you realize your fingers were nothing compared to this. “Ah-fuck,” you moan, your head falling onto his shoulders.

“So fucking tight, holy shit.” Jungkook exclaims as he adds another finger to your soaking cunt. Your back arches as he pumps his two fingers in and out of your hole, and your hips roll on his lap, trying to relieve your clit. You let out a whine when he pulled them out, but it was quickly replaced with a loud, heavy sigh of relief when three fingers pressed hard on your clit, rubbing circles.

“That feels so good; don't stop.” You cry into his ear; your pussy pulsates on his fingers. The pleasure from his fingers on your pussy has you digging your nails into his arms. “Do you like being fingered?” Jungkook asks as he inserts three fingers, stretching you out. “Yes, fuck yes.” you moan heavily. Your walls clench around Jungkook's fingers anytime he curls them into your g-spot, sending waves of shock to unravel in your abdomen. The squelching sound of your pussy mixes with your loud moans, making Jungkook's dick harden underneath you.

“My bed,” you pant, your eyes shut close as he continues to rummage his fingers into you. Jungkook gives a hum and nod of acknowledgement before pulling his fingers out of you, picking you both up in a quick, swift motion before dropping you on the bed with a squeal.

Jungkook lets out a small, breathy laugh, and his fingers fumble on the button and zipper of his jeans. Your breath gets caught up in your throat when he drops his pants on the ground, revealing the outline of his cock in his boxers. Your eye of vision suddenly went up to his chest when he took his shirt off in a split second, giving you a sight of small scars and bruises on his ribs, sending a punch to your stomach.

Your heart squeezed in your chest when he suddenly realized what you were staring at. You quickly made your way to the end of your bed, pulling him closer. Your lips dropped to the side of his rib cage, leaving a little chaste kiss on one of his bruises. A shaky breath leaves Jungkook as he watches you kiss every single purple, reddish mark and scar on his body.

Jungkook puts a finger under your chin before tilting it up, and your teary eyes make contact with his. 

“Hi.” He whispers softly.

“Hi.” You whisper back, a small smile plastered on Jungkook's face, before his lips make contact with yours. His hands this time worked on pulling down your shorts, which ended up taking your light pink-drenched panties down as well. Heat flowed through your body even though it was freezing in your house. You both broke apart from the kiss when Jungkook pulled on your shirt, pulling it over your head. 

The white shirt gets added to your guy's discarded clothes on the floor, and your hands wrap around his neck before pulling him down with you onto the bed. “M’gon squish you to death.” Jungkook groans as he lifts his weight on you, “What a heavenly way to die.” You joke, cracking a small smile at Jungkook.

You couldn’t even think of anything else because, before you knew it, Jungkook was in between your legs, sucking on your folds. The feeling was unfamiliar, but it felt so good. Your legs squeezed both sides of his face, caging him. His tongue worked magic on you, flicking his tongue all over your pussy. Your hands tangled with his messy raven hair, pulling harshly whenever he would suck on your clit for a little too long.

Your chest heaves as you try so hard to catch your breath. Jungkook moves his head from side to side erratically, earning a pornographic sound from you. Your walls clenched on Jungkook's fingers as he pumped them rapidly. “I’m g-gonna cum,” you cry out, your back arching as he hums onto your center, sending vibrations all over your body.

Your mind is fogged up with invisible smoke, and your lungs burn as you hold onto your breath. Your teeth bite roughly on your bottom lip to contain the moans that are threatening to spill out of you. Before you could say another word, white dots blurred your vision. "Your body squirms into Jungkook's face, coming in a loud moan.

“Hurts, ah” You cry, and a low chuckle rumbles against you as he begins leaving between your legs, but not before dropping a kiss on your inner thigh. Your thighs are pressed together, and your legs are sore as your center aches for more. “Felt good?” Jungkook kisses your cheek, and you nod with a whiney hum as his hand wanders behind you, unclasping your white cotton bra and untangling it from your arms before throwing it somewhere on the floor. Jungkook didn't waste any time putting his mouth on one of your nipples. His warm tongue plays with your bud, sucking, toying, and licking. Your head rolls back as your hands behind his head push him into you more.

“You're so good at this; should I be worried?” You moan as he grinds his hard-clothed length into you. “Don't think about that, baby.” He replies that a sad tone in his voice makes your heart feel as if it were being stabbed. “Oh.” You let out a sigh, and Jungkook planted a kiss on your collarbone. 

“I'm a virgin,” you say, tilting your head to the side to catch a look at Jungkook's face. His brows furrowed slightly before he dropped another kiss on your neck. “I’m not.” Jungkook says, planting a chaste kiss on your cheek. “What a slut.” You joke, playfully rolling your eyes, earning a laugh out of him. “You're annoying.” Jungkook laughs, his head dropping down beside the crook of your neck.

“But you love me.” You pip, moving your body underneath him, making him chuckle.

 “But I love you.” Jungkook looks up, a small smile displayed on his lips. “If I were having sex with someone I care about and love,” He whispers, “This would be my first time as well.” Jungkook finishes, making your heartbeat skyrocket. You feel as if you were on the moon, flying around with the stars.

“Pinky promise.” You smile, you raise your pinky finger up in front of his face, and you watch how he tangles his pinky with yours before smashing his lips with yours. “Pinky promise.” He whispers back into your lips. 

Kissing Jungkook was everything and more than you had ever wished for; his soft, cracked lips molded against yours, fitting like perfect puzzle pieces. “Fuck me, please.” You whine, and your hips rise up, trying to rub yourself against him, which has him pushing your hips down into the mattress with his tattooed hand. “Be patient, baby,” he whispers into your ear.

“Please,” you cry. Your hand slides between you both, palming him over his boxers and making him groan. “Please, fuck me.” you beg this time. Your palm squeezes his cock, making him thrust into you. 

Jungkook didn't reply; instead, he pulled down the last remaining clothing item that was covering him. He opened your legs, a shaky breath left your lip, and your eyes took him. His hair disheveled in a brown mess, his lips puffy and red, and the most mischievous grin on his face had your stomach fluttering with fireworks and roller coasters.

“Nervous?” Jungkook raises an eyebrow as he settles between your legs; his length rubs against your cunt. “It's big,” you bite your lip, as you look between you both. Jungkook bites his lip as he moves closer, placing his cock on you, his tip reaching your belly button. “It’ll fit, if that's what you're wondering.” Jungkook lets out a small snicker, and his thumb runs against your bottom lip.

“It's going to hurt, right?” You ask, your voice low and filled with lust, has heat rushing to Jungkook's cock. "Yes, baby, you’ll probably bleed a bit. But I promise it'll feel so good.” He comforts you; kisses are peppered all over your face, easing your nervousness. “Does this mean we are basically doing blood oaths?” You joke, your heart fluttering  when he lets out a deep, throaty laugh.

Jungkook opens your legs, his eyes drop to your glistening pussy, and your juices spill onto your pink sheets. His hand wraps around his cock, tugging roughly before slapping it on your pussy, making you let out a choked moan. "Ah,” you moan.

“Fuck.” Jungkook curses, "Baby, I don't have a condom,” he remembers. 

“I'm on the pill.” You rush out and say, “I got on them for my periods.” You explain which Jungkook nods. “You sure? We don't have to right now, baby,” Jungkook says, only to be received with a disapproving head nod from you. “No, I want you right now.” You say, your hand wrapping around his cock, giving it a small pump. 

You moan when you place his cock in front of your entrance, and with a small, reassuring smile, Jungkook is pushing his cock into you. “Ah, oh, my god.” You moan, and pain shoots up through your body as he pushes his length into you inch by inch, giving you time to get accustomed. “I know I'm sorry, baby.” Jungkook coos, dropping kisses all over your face as you feel his cock go in deeper. 

“So full.” You moan when his cock is fully in. Your fingertips dig into his back, leaving crescent moons. “Hurts?” He asks, his thumb rubbing your clit trying to help ease the pain. “A little.” You reply before giving him the green light to move. 

Jungkook's movements started slow, pulling his cock out of you and leaving his tip in before pushing in again at the slowest pace. Jungkook's eyes squeezed shut at the intense pleasure his body was feeling. Making him forget everything outside of this moment. You clench around him whenever he hits your g-spot.

The pain turns into pleasure as jungkook plunges into you at a faster pace. Your headboard hits your wall over and over, matching his thrusts. “Taking me so fucking good, fuck.” Jungkook groans, your moans mixing with the sound of the squelching of your juices.

Your mind is hazy, your bodies are hot. As beads of sweat start to form on Jungkook's forehead, a moan flushes out of you when he pushes one of your legs backwards, picking up his pace.

Your eyes roll to the back of your head when he hits the spot in you repeatedly. Drool starts dripping down the sides of your mouth, and your hands find your sheets tugging hard, turning your knuckles white.

“So good.” You cry out; his thrusts are harder, knocking the air out of your lungs, making you gasp for air each time he slams into you. Jungkook's cock twitches in you as he presses slightly on your belly, making a bulge of his cock appear inside of you.

“I’m going to cum,” you moan. “Not yet, baby, not yet.” Jungkook groans, pulling out. He flips you onto your stomach, presses your legs together before slipping into your pussy again with a loud groan.

"Shit, so fucking tight.” Jungkook moans, His hands squeeze your ass as he fucks you from behind. Your moans and screams get muffled by how you bite into your pillow. The position had him being able to go deeper, and tears started streaming down your cheeks. 

“I’m going to cum.” You scream into your pillow, as he grunts with each thrust he fucks into you. “Come baby.” He groans, giving your waist a squeeze of reassurance. He didn’t have to tell you twice, your orgasm all over his cock. Your body shakes, and you clench hard around him. His eyes roll to the back of his head as he spills into you.

Your bodies heave heavily, as he fucks you both through your orgasm. Soft moans and whines leave your lips as he pulls out of you, and the white fluid drips out of your hole, making Jungkook groan in satisfaction.

“Are you okay, baby?” Jungkook asks, his tone sweet and gentle as he flips you over to your back, catching a glimpse of your red cheeks and teary eye expression. “I think I just had an out-of-body experience.” You chuckle. Jungkook's eyes look over your body, looking for any bruises, but are met with none, which makes him sigh in relief.

“Yeah?” Jungkook wiggles his eyebrows, dropping a kiss on your lips before getting up from your bed and making his way to your vanity. He opens a couple of your drawers before picking up the package of wet wipes and making his way back to you.

“We need to change your sheets, baby.” Jungkook comments as he takes notice of the blood stain on them. He pulls one of the wipes out of the package, wiping you clean in a delicate manner. When he finished cleaning you up, he followed along with cleaning himself before disposing the wipes in your trash can beside your bed. 

He also quickly changes your sheets before jumping into bed with you. His head lies on your chest. Hearing your steady heartbeat, your fingers work on his back muscles as he relaxes further into you. The sound of rain outside pebbles against your window.

As you both lay intertwined, your breaths slowly returning to normal, Jungkook felt an overwhelming sense of peace wash over him. The familiar gnawing urge for drugs was conspicuously absent, replaced entirely by thoughts of you. Your touch, your warmth, and your love.

And for the second time in his life, the voices finally stopped as he fell asleep to the sound of your breathing.

[leighlew3]

Review time! Now on Amazon Prime.

My Old Ass

First off, I had to set aside my initial eye twitch and get past the fact that just inherently on principle I personally didn’t feel like we needed representation about a girl who’s gay until she meets the right guy ... BUT I’m willing to look past it in this rare instance because a) she’s still queer and b) the story was told so beautifully. Gotta just accept that she’s young and trying to figure herself out. And people are people, and we are complicated and ever evolving as human beings — especially at 18. And again, at the end of the day, she was still queer. Still bi/pan. It’s not like they made her straight. I would’ve rioted. 😂

Moving on…

I saw that twist coming from pretty much the first time she said to stay away from him. And sometimes the script tried a little too hard to be current in a way that was almost a tad cringey.

That being said…

I loved absolutely loved everything else about it.

The movie is so fucking charming.

The heart, the humor, the aesthetic — it was so beautifully shot.

I loved the performances.

I shed a tear. I was expecting to laugh. But I was not expecting to be moved so deeply, even if I did see all that coming. I was kind of rolling my eyes ahead of time and then wiping them later. So to still be able to deliver that emotional of a gut punch despite knowing it was coming? Bravo. And I give massive credit on that front to the actresses.

Aubrey Plaza is criminally underrated when it comes to drama.

And Maisy Stella… my gosh. What can I say? I just freaking adore her. From the very first episode of Nashville, hearing she and her sisters’ literally angelic voices and witnessing the beauty of their talent that literally blew me away, to now, seeing her leading her own film as an adult. Making it look so effortless. Making you just fall in love with this character however flawed and frustrating she could be. It all just makes you want to be friends with Elliott. And thus you follow her little journey that is poignant and heartbreaking and inspirational all at the same time.

[pink-heart-jam]

Ten BL titles to make you cry

Special thanks to @ghaniblue who inspired this reclist!

If you’re like me and enjoy your BL occasionally sprinkled with trauma & heartbreak, I got you some good food. As you can probably tell, these BL stories are not for the faint of heart so make sure to check the tags before jumping in. Apart from Momentum - which compiles both happy and sad shorts - these are really tough reads that tackle heavy themes such as depression, prostitution, sexual and psychological abuse, addiction and the likes. Some of these are just a series of unfortunate and painful events, really. But I promise that all the suffering comes with moving love stories about healing, endurance, redemption and hope; so if you enjoy complex characters, complicated relationships, amazing world building and compelling plots, you can’t go wrong with these. Completed works are marked with an *. Stay safe and enjoy!

*Dark Heaven by Juns

Conor, a Korean-American, lives in a city where same-sex marriage has been legalized, but where racist and homophobic hate crimes are still frequent. He joins a band with Simon and the two go on to create their own “dark heaven” in an abandoned church. Feelings develop between the pair, but light cannot dwell with dark, and their time together will soon come to an end.

*December Rain by Kimon

Fresh out of the army, Suchae decides to take some time off and travel around the country by himself. On the first day of his trip, he spots a guy who looks totally his type at a rundown bus terminal. Despite the possibility of him being a creep, Suchae is drawn to the mysterious stranger. Cw: tragedy

Given by Kizu Natsuki

The series follows a group of four students in an amateur rock band, and the dual romantic relationships that form among them: between electric guitarist Ritsuka Uenoyama and vocalist Mafuyu Satō, and between bassist Haruki Nakayama and drummer Akihiko Kaji.

Missing Love by In hyerin

While celebrating his engagement at a reunion, Lim Wooyeon encounters Lee Geom, who has gone missing for eight years. In a dark alley, Lee Geom, who disappeared after suddenly kissing him, awakens the regret buried in his heart.

*Momentum by Park ji-yeon

“Momentum” is a series of beautifully drawn vignettes that glimpse into the life-altering moments of several couples as they fall in and out of love. This BL features a series of characters learning how to love, understand, and forgive one another – and in some cases, the world – at different moments in their lives.

*Ouroboros by Songhyel

Woo Hyung’s life has hit rock bottom. He’s traumatized after several days of being imprisoned and abused by his brother-in-law, an event that eventually left him both wifeless and jobless. His only way of coping is sex, and two very different men who can provide exactly that show up in his life.

*Pearl Boy by Zoy, Inking

Dooshik is in a bind. After making off with the takings from the gay bar where he worked, he seeks refuge in a small, coastal town. As his funds dwindle, he desperately needs a way to make ends meet.

Saezuru Tori wa Habatakanai by Yoneda Kou

Yakuza Yashiro who only ever loved Kageyama, meets his new bodyguard, Doumeki Chikara. The masochistic, lewd and beautiful Yashiro and his silent, clumsy, impotent subordinate, Doumeki. This is the story of a man who has never known happiness and a man who is reborn by getting to know him.

*Stigma by Marloong

In the dark alleys of the city, there's no hope for trash like Sehyun. Having sex with strangers in the cramped stall behind a bar is just a typical Thursday night. But after a chance encounter with the brash and violent Boris, he begins to dream of living a normal life and putting an end to his restless nights.

Under the Plum Blossom Tree by Bori, Baekha

As the son of a prestigious political figure in Joseon, Hajin has only ever been interested in studying to become like his father. That is, until he meets Kim Namwoo, a young man who takes on various odd jobs as he struggles to pass his exams. As they overcome hardships together and learn more about each other's history, they soon realize that their lives are intertwined in more ways than they thought.

[riddleredcoats]

(hi it's me again) since i'm a curious little one so i have to ask something again

when writing your dragon age fics, do you have a sheet/doc somewhere to keep track of all the characters and your findings (and your own ideas) on orlais? a bit too in love with the way you write this country

aside from briala/celene, colombe, fleur and couteau are absolutely my favs. the way you looked at these side characters, gave them so much personalities then presented them beautifully in your works got me on a chokehold 😭 "that which shatters over and over and still beats" astounds me so much; briala thought they were reflections of celene but in the end they are briala's instead. absolutely heartbreaking 10/10 would reread and cry again. so like, i'm crawling in here asking if you have any crumbs about them that you can share for the starving peasant (i got it bad for colombe; tbh, all three of them but if i'm going to be stabbed to death like that one guy in colombe's chapter i hope it's colombe)

Hello againnnn!!! 🥰🥰🥰

I do sort of. I have a little scrivener file with some characters and worldbuilding about Orlais. What I think its the history between certain families even. It's not very detailed and the depth and variety of the subjects sorta vary on my moods. But there is such a file yes, lmao

Aw, man! Thank you so much! I do love the backstories I created for the Ladies-in-Waiting adn that which shatters over and over again but still beats is one of my favourite things i've ever written!

I do have little bits about them I suppose, but most of what I have has been or will be shown in the fic, but I suppose I do have somethings I don't think I ever wrote down.

Colombe is probably the person who has the most conflicted feelings about Celene. Even Briala is more consistent about what she feels about Celene. There's a lot of love there, from both parts, but there's also a lot of anger from Colombe - that is not, at all, misplaced. She would die for Celene, but she views it as her duty rather than an act of love. Although if pressed, she would say that she does love Celene - which yes, she does, but its complicated. She's the most romantic out of the three main ladies in waiting, and she's best at defensive techniques when she fights. Im pretty sure she shares her VA with Celene, so that's where her whole backstory comes from.

Fleur is, unsurprisingly, the leader of the all the ladies in waiting - I headcanon that there are at least thirteen ladies in waiting (10 for the countries of Thedas, and they act as spies ambassadors, and advisors to Celene on how to deal with the diplomats of the rest of the nations. the three main ones we see are the 'domestic' ones, and the onest Celene trusts the most - or rather actually trusts). Fleur really does become sort of a proto-mantillon, too; only she never does marry -she has her affairs - and she is the that is almost blindly loyal to Celene. She never really gets the hang of combat.

Couteau's siblings all make very respectable marriages instigated and organized by Celene. Couteau is, of course, the assassin and the one who coordinates the still remain assassin household that exists in the palace - tho, they all have other jobs too, Celene isn't big on letting things lie still. She's the only one of them who's married - she and husband are cordial, not very affectionate even tho Celene did try to find a love match for her. Couteau is very close to Colombe and Fleur and her feelings for Celene are refreshingly simple and straighforward - Celene appreciates that a lot about her.

man, thank you so much for the questions. I do love talking about my process and these faux-french assholes (affectionate)

[pebblysand]

Honestly your work is incredible. I recently discovered the fanfic hp world and as far as I’m concerned, castles is the only accurate continuation of hp. It’s so heartbreaking (in such a satisfying and imo accurate way) and thoughtfully done, and manages to merge a coming of age series into an adult “what happens next”.

You write about SA and what it’s like being a woman (aka complicated as shit) so incredibly beautifully and thoughtfully. I know others have rejected your longer prose but that’s what makes castles so beautiful. It’s long, nuanced, jumps around, because that’s what life is!

Honestly, castles is a book that has changed my life and I will never stop feeling that way. Like others have said, I think about it for days after you post a chapter (they stick with me!!). Thank you for this incredible art!

🥹 thank you so much! you guys, honestly, the response to this chapter has been incredible, you're all absolute legends! ❤️

[dr-lizortecho]

Echo #10 and #12

Rate the level of stupid they reach in their pining

Heyyy, they’re so dumbbbb (otp: bumbling horny morons), anyways on a scale of [1-10] Max is sitting at a solid 9. I mean this guy sounded so creepy stalkerish/serial-killery during his first “I love you” only his sincere tone of voice and soft sad puppy eyes carried him through. But mostly, he’s been pining for two decades in the pilot and still doesn’t know how to verbalize his feelings until the pressure is put on him. Liz is sitting at a solid 3, she’s less “stupid” and more careless. I mean “this town makes her {stupid}” and she wanders into the desert/creepy-ass cave with a pretty guy who just left a glowing handprint on her boob. Like- come on babe, better self protection techniques (ik Max looks safe and cute- but you don’t know him- not really). But outside of the practical “I knew this guy a decade ago and he didn’t seem dangerous” she handles her emotions very well. Immediately applying distance and keeping herself from acting on feelings/lust because she knows he’s lying etc etc

About three of the scenes that make me have feelings and (if available) find gifs that underline my point

This isn’t gonna be in order and it obviously fluctuates (cause I’m me) but we’ve got the 1x04 goodbye/confession. Liz telling him about her armor, that she feels terrified, that she doesn’t want to believe anything more than he didn’t hurt her sister, the way his voice shakes when he asks her for a “real answer- please”. Ruins me everytime.

The scene from 1x09 on the swing set, the way they just both opened their hearts up. Max about how much his powers scared him and Liz about how she was finding a way to forgive him for lying. It was heartbreaking and beautiful, and the connection between them was so beautifully played out. I mean- Max asking her if she really believed not saving someone was different than killing them, and the half heartbroken smile she gives him when she says “I’m trying to”. The way she tells him she doesn’t believe people are inherently good, but she thought he was and somehow still does.

And 2x06 the gynecologist scene! Cause it captures their playful and sweet energy so well, all while displaying exactly how much Max had reserved himself in trying to get with Liz in s1 due to the Rosa complications and her express desire to leave again.

fandom asks

[wotchergiorgia]

Ho postato 534 volte nel 2022

Sono 234 post in più del 2021!

39 post creati (7%)

495 post rebloggati (93%)

Blog che ho rebloggato di più:

@nymph-ad-ora

@localbookshop

@appleinducedsleep

@currentlycryingaboutlancelot

@metamorphesque

Ho taggato 166 dei miei post nel 2022

#self care is reading russian classics - 54 post

#one of my favorite things - 27 post

#books - 27 post

#writers - 25 post

#love books - 25 post

#writing - 24 post

#love of my life - 23 post

#harry potter - 19 post

#writers on tumblr - 16 post

#potterhead - 12 post

Longest Tag: 63 characters

#make projects and keep them secret until they've become reality

I miei post migliori nel 2022:

#5

Notes from Underground

14 note - Postate 5 febbraio 2022

#4

that passing and yet intense longing for love

18 note - Postate 2 aprile 2022

#3

there is nothing left to do, so I'll lie in my bed reading dostoevsky.

18 note - Postate 22 aprile 2022

#2

my non-spoiler review of fantastic beasts: the secrets of dumbledore - and why you all should watch it

fantastic beasts: the secrets of dumbledore is just amazing. I have been about to sob for all over the film (heartbreaking moments, too much for my heart that wasn't ready for all of this).

Finally I had the magic. This was magic. Everything. The characters are awesome, beautifully written, beautifully interpreted. Jude Law is simply perfect as Dumbledore, and in this film you can perfectly see it. Mads Mikkelsen is wow. His Grindelwald has something that Depp's did not have, though I loved the original Grindelwald too. But, now, after have seen the film, I can't imagine someone who isn't Mads at the place of Grindelwald. Something of his face, maybe, of his deportment, of his attitude, his expression. And Grindelwald has to be like this: noble, apparently gentle, mysterious, charming. The plot, the landscapes, the fantastic beasts themselves... All of it.

Plot

This film had to do only one thing: tell us who Creedence is. And, guys, I swear to you that we all come to know the truth. And, as Jo Rowling has always done, it is upsetting, something I would have never thought about. But this film is not simply this: it is about Dumbledore, and, God, Albus Dumbledore is the absolute protagonist. Finally his story - as we knew it through the seventh hp book - is told, perfectly told. We can see, all over the film, Dumbledore's pain on Jude Law's face, his regret, his love, his agony. It is the real Dumbledore, the one I've always wanted to see on the screen: a man that has been wrong many times in his life, a man that can't forgive himself for what he did, but also a man pure of heart that constantly tries to fix where he went wrong. And that is the important thing - as Newt says at a certain point: to try. This is not the same complicated and confusing plot of the second film. This is linear, clair. This has an objective and a road to follow. It is a very political film and I loved it. There are the election of the leader of the entire wizarding community all over the world, there is the German Ministry of Magic, the French one, the Spanish one, the MACUSA, and Our Ministry of Magic, the English one, as we know it. And because of this context I can say that Mads Mikkelsen's Grindelwald is the perfect one. But I don't want to make a spoiler, so here I finished.

Characters

One of the flaws of the second fb, were the characters: the second fb introduced too many characters without giving them a story. Well, it doesn't happen here. A few main characters that we come to know as well as the original protagonists - Newt, Queenie, Tina and Jacob - and that give a plus to the plot. Lally, Theseus, Yousuf and Bunty: they are the other main characters apart from Dumbledore, Grindelwald, Credence and our group of friends. Lally is a badass teacher of Ilvermorny; Theseus, Newt's brother, is completely different from the arrogant and distant one we knew in the second film; Yousuf is, maybe, the more mysterious of the group; Bunty is a brave sweetheart. Together, they make up a perfect group. Then, there is Aberforth. Wow. I love how Richard Coyle and Jude Law brought the Albus-Aberforth relationship on the screen. Perfect. The perfect picture of their complicated brotherhood, as Jo Rowling told in the seventh hp book. Credence is "less important" compared to the first and the second film. Now that everyone knows who he is, the only thing left to do is trying to save him from Grindelwald - who seems less affectionate to him. Well, I can't stay here talking about the characters (even if it is my favorite thing to do), but I can say a thing: they are perfectly written and I love them all.

Fantastic Beasts

If the second fb has almost forgotten to put the fantastic beasts into his plot, here the fantastic beasts steal the scene. They are awesome. We see, obviously, Teddy and Pickett, but there is also a creature from the hp books that we have never seen in the films: the Blast-Ended Skrewt, a giant one. And then, a creature you'll all adore is the Quilin, one of the rarest creature of all the Wizarding World, that has a main role in the whole plot. Trust me, you can't miss the fantastic beasts at all.

The Blood Pact

This is how the second film comes to end: with the blood pact of Grindelwald and Dumbledore which seems impossible to destroy. And yes, this pact is central in this third film, until the end. Inside it there is a young and yet powerful magic, as we have never seen before.

Places

From New York to Berlin, from Great Britain to the mountain chain of Himalaya. Berlin in the early 1920s is beautiful and the magical Berlin is something sublime. And then there is Hogwarts. Our beautiful Hogwarts. I was about to sob when I saw it. Because, after all this time, after all these years, Hogwarts is still there for us. And it is true that Hogwarts will always be there, because even this time it is. And we're inside it, in the Great Hall, among the Hogwarts' students. And we need it. We deserved it. To come home. It brought us home. Again. One time and forever. Always. I did not want those Hogwarts scenes to end.

I don't know if I finished, but I'm not finished with this film. The music (guys, the music! Howard did a fabulous work with it. There are the classical fb tracks - New says goodbye to Tina, Jacob's bakery etc. - but also the classical hp tracks!)... And all the references to the hp books and film! WE CAME HOME WITH THIS FILM. WE REALLY DID. I loved every aspect of it. Every. From the start to the end. And then, the "always" reference. I adored it.

Feel free to send me asks, if you want to know anything. I'll answer as I can (if you want spoilers... Well, I'm an expert in spoilers, but also if you don't want them).

46 note - Postate 14 aprile 2022

Il mio post numero 1 del 2022

17 people, 17 questions

firstly, thank you thank you thank you to @ekraaamm for tagging me!

nickname | gio (sometimes jo, but I hate it) - to be sincere, many people, to make fun of me, call me girgia, because when I was in sixth grade, while writing down my name on the Art folder, I forgot the O... so, well, basically giorgia became girgia to anyone who was there in that crucial moment.

sign | aries, rising in libra

height | 5,5 ft

last thing I googled | masterchef starting date

song stuck in my head | "there is a light that never goes out" the smiths

no. of followers | 140

amount of sleep | on average, I think around 7hrs

lucky number | 7 and I really don't know why

dream job | psychiatrist - forensic psychiatrist would be amazing, but I have to think about it

wearing | brown jeans, dr martens, school green hoodie - yes, today I look like a tree

movies/books that summarize you | movies atonement, about time (plus all the wizarding world production and A LOT of comedies). books the brothers karamazov, one hundred years of solitude, to the lighthouse, anna karenina, the umbereable lightness of being, letters to milena, the book of laughter and forgetting

favorite song | "something about the way you look tonight" elton john, "into my arms" nick cave, "last night I dreamt that somebody loved me" the smiths and "my melancholy blues" queen. I can't really choose

aesthetic | chaotic. chaotic academia in the cold seasons and chaotic cottagecore in the hot ones

favorite authors | kundera, dostoevsky, màrquez, tolstoy, woolf

favorite animal noise | bird's tweeting

random | I'm fond of chocolate. chocolate is my first and last love

tagging: @nymph-ad-ora @dopesoulcookiegoth @sapphiceffy @optimistic-nihilist @fictionalturtlenecks @in-love-with-remus-lupin @cunningfate @chillpotato @thelatinlibrarian @mkvx @nymphpens @poems-she-wrote @deniselavestal @ohwhpotter @expectolibrary @justpoetrythings @bookworm-on-rainy-days and anyone else who wants to join!!!

246 note - Postate 19 novembre 2022

Guarda ora l'Analisi del tuo anno 2022 di Tumblr →

[naisvalta]

hey I saw that ask where I'm supposed to send you a book, but instead im asking you for your 3 best books that you read last year! 📖📖📖 i trust your recommendations

1. summer sons by lee mandelo - best dark acadamia book ever and thats A FACT!! queer horror in the american south with a guy being haunted by the love of his life who he was "just friends" with... the atmosphere and vibes are just so correct in this one. theres weird gay ghost sex and complicated gay relationships and its so well written and i loved it sm.

2. the house in the cerulean sea by t.j. klune - a complete opposite of summer sons lol. this book is so soft and heart warming and lovely. i don't usually love super light and fluffy books but the characters in this were SO FUCKING WONDERFUL its impossible to not completely fall in love with the story. and the whole world and vibe in this book is just so... lovable. i could read 10 books of this universe. t.j. klune is a really talented writer i love him.

3. the great believers by rebecca makkai - such a fucking heartbreaking and beautiful and tragic and wonderful story about the AIDS epidemic told from dual POVs by a gay man and a straight woman whose brother and friends were all gay. this book is so fucking beautifully written and it ripped my heart out but also filled me with so much love and pride and hope. A MUST READ.

[xjoonchildx]

y'all it's about time i put this doctorate in minism to good use, right?

these are all amazing yoongi fics by amazing authors. as with any list i put together, there's no way it's comprehensive and i'm sure i left someone out, but i'll do my best to keep it updated as stories come in!

please note that all fics listed below are 18+/mature unless otherwise indicated.

bound by obiwrites (AO3 only)

current obsession. i don't know how obi manages to write such compelling characters and relationships. i would literally read a fic that was just outtakes from fights between yoongi and OC because their dynamic is that addictive. this is a continuation of the arranged series which you guys know i'm nuts for. so, so good.

strike a chord by @snackhobi

i am weak for a delicious build-up. joy absolutely delivers that in this fic. the slow simmer of the attraction between OC and piano player yoongi (bonus app is so damned satisfying. and just wait till you get to the smut.

i'll float away by @ppersonna

a masterpiece. this fic ripped my damned heart out but in the end it was worth it. a gripping story about addiction and heartbreak and making it through to the other side. wonderful.

take one by @untaemedqueen

one of the wildest and most interesting plots i've read in a damned long time. d's idea was so damned original. a fic within a fic. i loved the way this unfolded and of course, the smut was fuego.

the mark of yun-ki by @ladyartemesia

viola is one of the most creative writers on this site. she weaves a hypnotic tale of birthright and claim in this story that makes you not want to put it down until the very last word.

dig deep by @johobi

this characterization of yoongi absolutely makes my knees weak. the tsundere vibes but at the same time hiding the softness beneath. this story is so creative and wild but then it gets so incredibly hot. truly a fantastic read.

please be naked by @floralseokjin

i said it when i reblogged it, i'll say it again. one of the best yoongi fics i've ever read. i loved the angst and the complicated feelings in this fic. i love love love pining. this was incredibly well done and the smut was absolutely scorching.

birthday girl by @btsarmy9593

one of the most original stories on this site right now. an OC with an unusual situation, a chance encounter, and the relationship that unfolds is so different and fantastic. i love this quiet, confident yoongi and this OC who is slowly coming into her own. one of e's best stories.

want a taste? by @suga-kookiemonster

i believed every single word that came out of yoongi's mouth in this fic. ashley's characterization was perfect, the OC was smart and funny and capable. i'll never look at those massage chairs at the mall the same way again.

moonlit throne by @hobidreams

this is lush and sweeping, truly engrossing. you can absolutely tell the amount of care and detail rain put into this series with the historical backdrop. it is also just a pleasure to read, so wonderfully written and so easy to get lost in each drabble.

backstage by @wwilloww

this fic was so hot it bent my mind. just idol AU yoongi blowing off a little *ahem* steam backstage. willow's writing will forever be some of my favorite and it doesn't matter if she's doing drama or smut or angst, she always delivers.

back to bed by @hesperantha

lil sold this as a sleepy smut and honestly that's the best thing about it. a soft, simmering, believable slice of heaven in between the sheets with min yoongi. sounds great, right? great.

fortuitous by @underthejoon

if you've been following me for .05 seconds you know my ultimate weakness is an arranged marriage fic. this is so wonderfully done, the way these two characters accidentally come together before being put together.

not your fairytale by @yeojaa

i will forever ever ever simp for erin's writing. the flow and the cadence are spectacular. i love how she describes the quiet moments between two people sniffing around one another and as usual, she does that beautifully in this fic. childhood friends to lovers which is a bonus, because as i've mentioned we love a delicious build-up.

a scam marriage by @xotoosweet (SFW)

again, y'a strangers being forced to marry under less than desirable circumstances, right? great. because this fic was great. OC and yoongi cook up a plan to get through a financial tough spot and as with all well-laid plans. well. you know.

blood bounty by @lemonjoonah

lemon's MIND, you guys. one of the most creative writers on this site. this retelling of anastasia is so damned captivating and interesting. i loved this yoongi, afraid of himself and afraid of missing out on something he wants so badly. beautiful.

the dinner party by @lamourche

one of the first BTS fics i ever read and it stands the test of time. i love how real these two are, how evie makes them believably flawed and damaged but still at their essence, good.

miss dial by @versigny and @cyphertrip

okay, this is just a lot of fun. an errant text, a sexy yoongi, a miscommunication and what follows is just hot and satisfying. i love yoongi's characterization in this fic.

[auyouni]

just say you won’t let go // septiplier

Jack doesn’t know why he does this to himself. 

Really, who else is this self-sabotaging? Asking the straight guy he’s in love with to be his fake boyfriend for Christmas Eve is crossing a line that he never wanted to cross, but, to be fair… He never expected Mark to say yes. He knows it’s for the money, of course, that Jack had just offered up a price that he simply couldn’t refuse, but the genuine excitement on his best friend’s face at the idea of finally meeting Jack’s family had been worth that small heartbreak. He feels guilty for not doing it sooner, hiding Mark away like some dirty little secret – which is kinda accurate, but he is in no way ashamed of being friends with him, or… anything else about Mark, really. The only shame he carries is reserved specifically for himself. 

It’s just so complicated to be around Mark. All sorts of emotional turmoil and their shared concerning past, and really, it was easier to just never properly introduce them than deal with those things in the light of day, where he can be ashamed of how in love he is with him, of how much he’d do or spend just to keep him by his side for a millisecond longer. He hasn’t even really told the few friends he still has – it’s just too much, always too much. 

And, oddly, never enough. 

His fingers drum rapidly on the driving wheel as he creeps along the ice slick roads, suppressing the urge to glance over at Mark as best he can. He’d surprised him when Jack picked him up, wearing a tux that fit him perfectly, hugging his body in ways that Jack really cannot afford to be distracted by tonight. 

Still, because Jack’s eyes are always drawn to Mark, he finds himself looking over when they’re at a stoplight. 

His hands hover over the vents blasting heat, trying to warm himself up as much as possible, head slightly bouncing along to whatever song is on the radio (Roses by The Chainsmokers, he thinks?), the streetlights illuminating him beautifully, with a small smile on his lips as he gazes out at the snow fluttering down around the car… Suddenly, Mark’s head turns a little, eyes catching his, and Jack can see just how excited he is, the genuine joy in his expression at being able to do this with him… He can’t help the smile rising to his lips in response, heart so full of his best friend in that moment that he’s sure he’ll cry. 

He doesn’t. 

It’s becoming easier and easier for him to hide strong emotions from Mark, burdens that only he has to bear, and he’s utterly thankful for it. If he knew… If he knew how Jack truly felt, he’d run the other way and never look back. The idea twists his gut a little, and he feels oddly ill, but he can’t dwell on it because Mark is saying something now, tugging him back down to reality with a soft hand on his shoulder. 

“Jack,” Mark says, a barely concealed laugh in his voice, and the Irish boy is certain that his name has never sounded as good as it does coming from his lips, “the light’s green.” Jack blinks a little, surprised, and turns to see that Mark’s right. His cheeks burn as he hits the gas, wishing it wasn’t so easy for him to be distracted by his feelings for his best friend. It’s ridiculous, inconvenient, and… 

Wholly unrequited. 

“Sorry, got a bit distracted,” he says, a tad sheepish. Mark’s eyes don’t leave his face, and Jack wishes he could see his expression. Does he know? He has to by now. It’s not like you’re subtle… 

“Thinking about how hard you’re gonna fuck me tonight?” Mark asks, voice teasing and just a little bit lower – he knows how to get Jack riled up with ease. Jack splutters, blushing, and now that the words are out there, he can’t think of anything besides Mark moaning and wanton beneath him, begging for— 

“W-who says I’m fuckin’ you t’night?” he asks in lieu of answering, jumping onto the new topic. It may not be safe, but at least it’s far, far away from his real feelings toward Mark. 

“Oh come on, Sean,” Mark says in a sultry voice, leaning forward, and Jack can’t help a small shiver, “I know you by now. You were giving me serious bedroom eyes when I walked out of my house.” Oh, like he could’ve helped that - the beautiful boy had dressed up for him, suit and tie and just… damn.

“I paid for a weekend o’ bein’ my fake boyfriend, Mark – I don’t have enough money f’r sex,” he manages to get out, feeling guilty and disappointed in himself for not being able to afford it. 

It’s quiet for a few moments, the radio the only thing breaking the silence. Here we go again / I kinda wanna be more than friends / so take it easy on me / I’m afraid you’re never satisfied… Jack changes the channel quickly, hoping Mark doesn’t notice. 

“Well… doesn’t being a boyfriend usually involve that?” Mark asks, and Jack’s a little taken off-guard. His head whips to face him, eyes wide, but the other boy is staring straight ahead, looking deep in thought, teeth catching at his lower lip. Jack gulps, forcing himself to look back to the road before he drives them into a sign or something. 

“I-I… I guess, yeah,” he manages, voice coming out a little weak, waiting a little desperately for Mark to continue, though he’s certain that he wouldn’t actually be offering— 

“Well then, you… I mean, you paid quite a bit for the full boyfriend experience…” There’s something a little off about Mark’s voice, something almost kind of… worried? But then Mark’s lips are suddenly inches from Jack’s ear, murmuring, “So I want you to fuck me tonight, sweetheart. Feel your cock deep inside of me, while your parents sleep in the other room… Want you so, so badly, Sean...” Jack’s muscles are tight with the effort of keeping himself from jumping Mark then and there, car crash be damned, and it's the hardest thing he's ever had to do to keep his eyes trained on the road. It’s a familiar game, after all, but one that he’s probably never going to get used to. “My boyfriend.” Jack moans at that, turning a little too harshly into an empty parking lot and hurriedly putting the car in park. It’s all a dirty lie, he knows this – but he also knows that he’s never once stood a chance at resisting Mark when he does shit like this, especially with that one single word that resonates so deeply within Jack. His seatbelt hits something as he tosses it aside – like he cares – and then he’s on Mark, pressing him against the passenger door and kissing him. The boy beneath him wraps his arms around him easily as he kisses back just as eagerly. 

He always knew how to put on a good show, make it so believable that Jack’s certain that Mark wants him just as much as the Irishman always has. When his lips press against his, devouring him whole, Jack can forget that this isn’t real, that he’s not actually allowed to want this. 

But for one whole weekend, he is. For one weekend it’ll be real, Jack will be able to hold his hand, fix his hair, compliment him, tell everyone and anyone who will listen just how much he adores this boy with the beautiful brown eyes and the ridiculous levels of charm, who throws marshmallows at him whenever he wins at a game and tickles him in the worst possible settings and sits with him in his car and has long, deep chats with in the middle of the night, leans against him as he drifts off to sleep… 

It’s all allowed. 

Mark is, for the weekend, only his, and the idea alone is enough to make Jack want to cry. Instead, he just kisses him harder, holds him closer, and tries to let himself believe it. 

“J-Jack, we’re gonna be late,” Mark says a few hickeys later, top few buttons of his shirt undone and hair a mess, still squirming under him as Jack’s teeth scrape along the sensitive skin of his neck. He’s not an idiot – none of these will actually be visible, except for maybe the edge of one, but it’s enough for him. 

“Mhmm?” he hums as a reply, nipping softly at a sensitive spot just below Mark’s jaw. Nothing in the world matters as much to him in that moment as the beautiful sounds spilling from his lips. 

“We n-need to go,” he tries again. “Don’t wanna g-get there after everyone e-else…” 

Jack doesn’t respond for a few seconds, lips meeting his in a deep kiss, taking the moment to just taste him. When he finally pulls away, a string of saliva connecting their lips, he smirks down at him, eyes hooded. “Even if I, say… sucked y’r dick?” Mark bites back a moan, squirming more (he couldn’t help loving the Irish boy’s blowjobs, often trying to figure out casual ways to ask for one – though Jack always seems to offer, anyway), and Jack’s smirk grows, hand sliding down Mark’s side. 

“Fuck.” Mark shuts his eyes briefly, seemingly at war with himself, and then he's peering back out at Jack, pupils blown too wide. “We can't. I wanna make a good first impression on your parents.”

Jack sighs, trying to be upset, but really, he's biting back a smile. “Fine, I guess. But I'm definitely suckin’ you off later t’night, first chance I get.” It looks like Mark blushes at that, but it can't be, right? It's just the lighting, he's sure.

Mark leans in, pressing a short kiss to his lips - and despite its brevity, it's still enough to leave Jack breathless.

“You may also wanna fix y’rself up a bit… ya look a bit sexed up,” Jack tacks on teasingly, winking at Mark, and the other boy rolls his eyes, grinning back at him.

“Hmm, I wonder whose fault that was?” he replies, pushing at Jack's shoulder with a small laugh.

“Um, fuckin’ yours!”

“Was not!”

“Was too!”

“Was not!”

“Really? And who was th’ one whispering in my ear like a damn temptress??? Can't fault me f'r givin’ in, I'm just a man.”

Mark snorts softly, eyes flickering with amusement, and god, but Jack just wants to spend the rest of the night in this car with him, joking and chatting and letting the rest of the world pass them by beyond the fogged up windows.

Let everyone else take the world, Jack just wants Mark.

[icequeenbae]

Desert Flower (m) Ch. 2 | BBH

Pairing: Baekhyun x Reader x Baëkhyun

Characters: EXO and X-EXO (not all of them mentioned)

EXO vs X-EXO dynamics, complicated relationships, angsty, action, smut (as usual)

Warnings: sorta mingling with your ex’s ‘evil twin’, mentions of blood/ violence (nothing too graphic… I suppose), Y/N gets teary a lot(?), explicit content, rough sex, unprotected sex

Word Count: ~13.5k (full), ~3.4k (Chapter 2)

Summary: Baekhyun, your beloved boyfriend of three years, suddenly breaks up with you and disappears from the city in an attempt to protect you. But leaving you alone and clueless means trouble will surely find you. For it is easy to spot a flower in the desert.

Masterlist   >> One >> Two (m) >> Three (m) >> Four (fin)

Author’s Note: This chapter is going to be a little different! There’s angst, there’s drama, there’s smut... You will find out what I meant by ‘complicated relationships’ 🤭 Don’t forget to share your thoughts^^

Tags: @blahblahblah-boo​ @baeklightsx​ @wooya1224​ @baekklove​

Chapter 2. Get him back

The day he left you it was pouring, and in your mind, it rained ever since. Hours turned into days, days turned into weeks, and weeks flew by. You did everything on autopilot, without thinking or differentiating between tasks. Everything around you was a grey mess, and you couldn’t maintain a single thought in your head, not one thought that didn’t have something to do with the breakup.

Was it even that? He just left, telling you that it was ‘for your own good’. Asking for no opinions. Frankly, you were angry with him. You would've been furious, but it was hard to tap into your irritation when it hurt so much in your chest. For the first time in your life, you realized that you were gone too far. So far, that you felt like a piece of you was missing now. The one you’d possibly never get back.

You also realized that you belonged fully to that friend circle as well — there wasn’t even anyone for you to talk to anymore, or wallow with, which made your sorry ass feel even more pathetic. Your entire world revolved around your protective boyfriend of three years, and now that he was gone it felt as unsafe as ever. Who knows, maybe it was your sixth sense alerting you as to what was to come.

It happened over a month after your last encounter with Baekhyun.

You were lounging in the campus library, mostly because your weeks of heartbreak caused you to miss a few deadlines, so now you had to take additional assignments to do well at the finals. Having no inspiration, or better yet, no one to hurry to, made you stay there for long hours, barely managing to get one task completed at a time.

The space was almost empty since it was rather late, and looking around you suddenly felt a tinge of nostalgia. Muttering that you should get ahold of your stupid self, you walked slowly towards the tall aisle with your useless book. In the labyrinth, you wandered for a bit, reminiscing of the first interaction with your… now ex? Your first boyfriend? Your first love?

The thought left a bitter taste in your mouth, and you opted for walking further as if surrounded by books you could somehow block your bubbling feelings out.

A strange sound caught your attention.

No idea why, you kept walking towards it, soon stepping around the corner and freezing on the spot.

Only a few feet away there was a couple making out. The girl was pressed harshly into the shelves and grunted, as her partner shoved one hand underneath her shirt to squeeze her breast, and his other one grasped her neck, adding to the obscenity of their misplaced passion. You were ready to flush tomato red and vanish on the spot when you noticed something… familiar.

That side profile.

You would never mistake it for anyone else’s.

Wide-eyed in shock, you almost jumped when the male turned around, dark irises foreign to you. His eyebrow raised slightly as he took in your distress with half-lidded eyes, not even bothering to stop groping the girl.

‘B- Baekhyun?’ You said in such a tiny voice that you barely even heard yourself.

The sound of your book dropping to the floor ripped you out of the stupor, and you turned around. Out of the labyrinth you ran, not even bothering to put your belongings back into your bag neatly. You simply grabbed everything from the table and kept running. The surroundings were blurry, but you could see one thing clearly – his lustful eyes, mocking your naivety.

It hurt too much. Unable to hold your tears till you make it home, you found yourself locked in the stall of the nearest bathroom. The way you cried there was almost physically painful, and you struggled to catch enough air as you did. Nor did you care enough to prevent yourself from making noises. Your whole body was shaking with your sobs, and you weren’t entirely sure you hadn’t gone crazy just then. From seeing what you saw. From reopening the still-hurting wounds and seasoning them richly with salt.

However long it took you to dehydrate yourself with the seeping sorrow, you managed to stop, hiccupping only every now and then. Finally shoving your laptop and notes into your bag, you got out of the stall. Walking up to a mirror on wobbly legs, you gasped at your puffy face and red swollen eyes. Not that you really cared, but it was quite late, so you had good chances of sneaking out and getting home unnoticed.

Unless someone would be purposefully waiting for you to show your face, of course.

You took notice of the dark figure across the hall momentarily after exiting the bathroom. Turning the other way, you increased the pace of your steps, almost breaking into running speed to put some distance between the two of you.

‘Hey,’ a voice called from behind, and you felt a hand grabbing your upper arm to stop you.

The nerve he had.

‘Don’t fucking touch me!’ You barked at him, ripping away from his grasp fiercely.

He blinked, letting go, and you almost hiccupped again at the sight of his hair – even more silvery-white now than when he left you, slightly unkempt (from the prior activities, no less). As he opened his mouth to say something, you beat him to it.

‘Don’t talk to me. Don’t even look at me. You make me sick!’ You spat, wanting to both claw at his beautifully sculpted face and to snivel pathetically again. Instead, you turned around and took off before he gathered himself enough to try initiating a conversation again.

Because… What the fuck was he thinking?

***

You fell ill. It probably wasn’t unrelated to what happened at the library, but you became so feverish that your roommate was on the verge of driving you to the hospital. Three days later your fever finally broke, however, you felt weak and drained and depressed for another week afterwards.

Staying at home, you kept rewinding back to the ‘event’. How could he? Coming back like that, and not even having the decency to not screw around right under your nose. You were repulsed by what you saw, and it was almost hateful how the heaviness in your chest only worsened. The bitterness of the situation added to it – he lied to you, just to be with someone else weeks, or, perhaps, even days, hours after. Maybe all of it was a lie, you didn’t know anymore.

This Baekhyun… You didn’t think you’d ever known him.

The subsequent week you avoided all of the crowded areas of the campus, dreading that you’d have to face him again. It would be impossible to maintain your calm in that case, so you took all of the possible precautions. But what could you have done if he was looking for you?

Upon your following encounter, you failed your attempt to vanish out of his sight the way you did before. It was essentially you walking into a trap, as you headed home rather late after finally squeezing your last important assignment out on paper. Not giving the outside world a single moment of attention, you stopped at the top of the stairs to put your phone into your bag and zip it up.

‘Aren’t you a mystery woman, Y/N,’ the voice almost made you drop your stuff.

You glanced up, taking notice of the murky figure, leaning onto a nearby tree. As he began walking in your direction, you turned on your heels and took off. It felt stupid to run from him like this, but you absolutely did not want to break down in front of him. You wanted to preserve at least some dignity.

As you flew down the stairs, you stumbled and almost dove headfirst to the ground. Thankfully, a swift limb wrapped around you before you could do that.

‘Are you dumb?’ He exclaimed into your ear.

‘Let go of me!’ You writhed in his hold, trying to free your body from the illusive familiarity of his touch.

‘You’re a danger to yourself! What the fuck,’ he swore under his breath, releasing you at once.

‘I told you to leave me alone. Do whatever you want, just stay out of my freaking life, Baekhyun!’ You yelled in his face, fuming from his shameless behavior. Why was he acting like nothing was even wrong with this?

‘Unbelievable. Your twin screws someone over, and you’re the one held accountable,’ he rolled his eyes.

Twin… what?

‘What are you talking about?’ You asked in bewilderment.

‘I believe, introductions are in order. I’m Baëkhyun, nice to meet you.’

***

That was… embarrassing. So embarrassing.

You had no idea there was, well, a live copy of Baekhyun walking around. And even though your ex-boyfriend was secretive, you couldn’t believe he left something like this out. Were you an actual joke to him?!

Baëkhyun said they weren’t particularly close. He explained to you that he hadn’t seen his twin in years, and his friends helped him obtain the little knowledge of his whereabouts that led him here. Thinking he could find Baekhyun by asking around he… got ‘involved’ with a girl or two. Or a dozen, who knows? But, apparently, your reaction the first time you’d met piqued his curiosity. When you flushed at the memory, apologizing profusely, he only said that he found it odd and strangely cute, the way you got upset with him.

‘I’m not as great of a guy as Baekhyun,’ he shrugged. ‘Not that I’m trying to be, anyways.’

You frowned.

After the way he left you, Baekhyun was not at the top of your ‘greatest people of all times’ list either. You could understand why your new acquaintance mentioned this, you had witnessed enough to gather that he was not at all well-behaved. Also, his ways of extracting information… Not very professional, to say the least. But who were you to judge? Now that you’d learned that he wasn’t your ex, you were genuinely ashamed of the hysteria of the past couple of weeks.

But Baëkhyun was different.

When he got your number and promised to text, you didn’t think much of it. You hummed and rolled your eyes – as if that was going to happen. Yet he surprised you by sending a quick message the following week. And then… you just kept talking. Which went on for a while, whilst you’d grown slightly addicted to it. Somehow, Baëkhyun became the only person who could take your mind off of his twin. So, even when you finally went on the long-awaited summer break, you stayed in touch with him. And not only via text – you’d been seeing each other on a regular basis.

Randomly at first – you’d just bump into him somewhere around the university premises, and he’d then suggest grabbing coffee. But as it progressed, you ended up inviting him over for dinner. Partially because you felt acutely lonely with your roommate gone, and partially because… you missed him. It was hard to put a finger on it – you’d initially thought that it was just misplaced longing for Baekhyun that pushed you towards his twin, and it felt so wrong. Almost like you wanted to use him to soothe the ache in your heart that had been bothering you ever since your ex-boyfriend had left.

Yet Baëkhyun seemed so magnetic. He hypnotized you with his blue eyes, which changed from the icy light color to dark, almost black, and were just as sharp as his twin’s. And his sassy smirk – the one he had plastered across his face almost always. Baëkhyun wasn’t warm like Baekhyun, yet there was still something about him that had you walking willingly into his trap. Maybe it was the mysterious glint in his eyes as he looked down at you or the way he sized you up whenever he caught a glimpse of you, like you were his prey. Being alone with him felt both dangerous and exciting, and you kept fooling yourself, basing your blind trust on nothing but his relation to your ex.

You never noticed how quickly he managed to build trust between you. And how you didn’t even know much about him, yet you did tell him a lot. Like that one time, he asked you where you thought Baekhyun was.

‘Wouldn’t I like to know,’ you chuckled, sadness in your voice. ‘He just left. I don’t think he even kept his phone.’

‘I always said he was the dumb one of the two. And to think that he’s the strategist,’ he snorted, splayed on your couch comfortably.

You looked at your hands in your lap, subconsciously calming yourself by playing with your fingers.

‘Stop,’ you shivered as his palm covered your fidgety hands. ‘Stop thinking about him.’

Eyes traveling to his face, you caught a glimpse of the frown that formed there.

And then he kissed you. Out of the blue, giving you no time to think or pull away.

And you let him. Grabbing at the soft leather of his pants, you allowed him to do as he pleased with you. Baëkhyun tasted familiar, though his kissing was anything but – rough and messy, lots of tongue and teeth, making your head spin with flaming passion. You didn’t resist when he pulled you into his lap, or when he ripped your clothes off, item by item. He was not asking and you were not thinking. It didn’t feel like something you should stop at the time. Rather, you thought you would’ve cried had he paused for longer than a second, so you kept clinging to him in response.

The demanding grip he had on your thighs only made you crave it more, lust seeping into your system as you wrapped your arms around his neck and rolled your hips into his. He emitted a deep sound, helping you grind on him.

‘Good girl,’ he gritted into your lips, landing a slap or two on your ass along the way.

As you kept going, your bare breasts grazed his skin, and your panties became soaked and sticky. You were probably flushed rosy red as you chased the tight feeling in your lower abdomen, his eyes hungrily taking in your frenzy. He slapped you again, a sharp hit resonating through you like electricity.

‘Baëk,’ you half-moaned. ‘Please fuck me-’

You couldn’t even believe that you were begging him like that, out loud. But the desperation grew as your body threw itself at him, demanding release.

He moved your panties out of the way, fingers instantly getting wet with your arousal.

‘Such a needy little slut,’ he murmured, making you shiver.

It was all new. The name-calling, the manhandling, the way he bit harshly into your lower lip and tugged at your hair. And somehow, it was exactly what you needed.

He didn’t waste much time to prep you, opting for taking his already hard length out and running the tip between your folds, making you jolt and cry out, nails digging into the back of his neck.

‘Sink on my cock and take what you want. Like a bad girl would.’ He addressed in a low voice, smearing the remainder of your lipstick over your mouth with his thumb. ‘Wanna be a whore for me?’

‘Yes,’ you muttered, and he smacked you on the ass again, emphasizing that you needed to be louder. ‘Yes!’

He let go of your hips, hands resting on your legs, allowing you to slam down on your own. You whimpered at the slight burn but kept going. Moving this fast wasn’t the way you were used to doing it, but all the more exciting for that. Using his shoulders to steady yourself, you worked your hips hard. A sheen of sweat on your chest glimmered as you increased the pace, wailing as his tip nudged at your cervix. He watched you with his dark blue eyes, hands kneading your ass, and filthy mouth guiding you.

‘Squeeze your tight little hole.’

Meanwhile, you struggled to maintain the tiresome pace, yet held onto the sensation of his girth pressing against your walls as he glided in and out of you.

‘Ah fuck, Baëkhyun!’ You moaned, feeling the tickle of perspiration making its way down your abs.

‘I know you’re close.’ He licked his lips seductively. ‘Want me to help?’

‘Yes, yes, please,’ you keened, leg almost cramping from the uncomfortable position.

‘Leave your begging for another time, baby. Like I said, if you want something, you should take it.’

You whined, head spinning at the suggestion. His eyes, expectant, traced the stubborn crease between your brows while you kept rocking your hips. Then, you did the first thing that came to your blurry mind. Your hands reached up to grasp his hair and pull hard, tilting his head back and leaving the long column of his neck exposed for the attack of your lips. Sucking a bruise on it harshly, you then used your teeth to ensure he’d have a bright mark in a few hours. Creeping up his neck and his jaw, you licked at his lower lip, and then into his mouth – like an animal would.

‘Oh,’ he smirked, hands seizing you and holding you down, with him snug inside you. ‘So, my good girl is not as innocent as she seemed?’ He teased, the lustful glint in his eyes boosting your confidence to the level of insolence.

‘Shut up,’ you replied firmly, sliding off of him and flopping backwards to finally get some circulation in your legs. ‘Stop slacking off and make me come, you asshole.’

His eyes flashed at your brazen words. Shoving you roughly until you were flat on your back, he grabbed onto your thighs, dragging you closer to him. Instantly you cried out as he landed two consecutive slaps on your pussy, holding his heavy hard-on at the base. Pleased with your reaction, he did it again, not saying another word before he bottomed out inside you. A new wave of arousal washed over you, and you clenched around him, eyes fluttering shut. He didn’t even think to spare you the morning soreness as he nailed you like an actual whore.

‘Ah right there, right there- oh fuck, Baëkhyun,’ you sobbed, clawing at his flexed arm, when he placed one of your legs over his shoulder and leaned forward, basically stretching you open for himself.

This position made you feel vulnerable, like you had no choice but to take everything he was giving you, but it was what you needed. His every thrust resonated inside, making your muscles clench, and ripping more curses and moans out of you. Even though his pace was rather brutal, there wasn’t too much pain along with it – Baëkhyun knew all the right spots.

Mouth agape, you arched your back in silent agony, and a few more hits of his thighs later came so hard that it almost made you pass out on the spot. The hand over your mouth muffled your scream, and he let your leg slide off of his shoulder, pressing his palm against it to keep you in place and prevent you from closing your knees.

Muscles contracting uncontrollably, you whimpered at his continued thrusts as you became too sensitive from the drawn-out pleasure, tears soaking your lashes by the time he finally pulled out.

Baëkhyun grunted lowly, and you opened your eyes to witness him jerk himself off at the sight of your swollen, fucked out pussy, not even blinking until thick ropes of his semen painted your lower belly.

Despite having just performed a thorough fucking, he lowered himself on his elbow slowly and brushed the rogue strands of hair away out of your eyes.

‘You’re a naughty one. I love it,’ he murmured, positioning one of his hands on your neck as he kissed you deeply. ‘Don’t worry, I’ll teach you how to be in control.’

And so, you let yourself fall down the rabbit hole. And there was no telling what you’d gotten yourself into.

>> Chapter 3

A/N: Whooo, Baёk is here, stirring some kind of trouble, isn’t he? 🤭 Our poor Y/N-ie is walking on thin ice. What do you think of their relationship? Feels a little bit like cheating, right? Technically it isn’t. But still, the darkness is always pretty seductive...

[gabriella-nastasja]

the power behind sad girl music

by Gabriélla Siebritz 

My introduction to “sad girl music” - solemn breakup anthems, deeply metaphorical self-reflection ballads, angry girl power melodies - was brought to me on the pink iPod I received one Christmas as a gift at the tender age of eight. Some of the first few songs I had downloaded (with approval from my mom) were Leave (get out) by the iconic 2000s singer Jojo, Complicated by the legendry Avril Lavigne and Behind These Hazel Eyes by the American Idol herself, Kelly Clarkson. 

From the get-go it seems, I was destined to be a feelings type of girl. Internally my emotions were loud, before eventually spilling over into my reality.

As my tastes and personality developed as I grew, I discovered my love for songs that have a melancholic and somewhat dramatic touch to it. I love music that makes me stop, pause the music and sit with the lyrics, accompanied by visuals that I get to analyse and dissect - I eagerly want to dive headfirst into a rabbit hole of metaphors and Easter eggs cleverly left behind by the artists I admire. 

From Avril Lavigne, came Taylor Swift; although, admittedly I wasn’t a fully-fledged Swiftie until recently. And now, here I sit, with my Spotify open and the voice of Taylor, along with the voices of Lorde, Lana Del Rey, FKA Twigs, SZA, Mitski, Billie Eilish and Olivia Rodrigo, to name a few, filling up my room. I've always found it satisfying to scream along to lyrics, even if the situation penned by these singers doesn’t always apply to me.

Music is open to interpretation after all, so while I might not have had the same tumultuous relationship Taylor Swift sang about in her ten minute song All Too Well (Taylor’s Version) or knowingly been in a damaging relationship like Mitski was in Washing Machine Heart, or begging not to share the love I have with my partner with outsiders invading the relationship as FKA Twigs did in her song Cellophane, their words still ring true and tug on my heartstrings, urgently pulling at me to listen on repeat and find ways to relate it to myself or anything else I find joy (and sadness) in. 

SZA's song, Normal Girl, is told from the singer’s perspective of being in love with someone she can’t have because she doesn’t fit or measure up to his standards, according to an article written by Todayville. Unrequited love isn’t a brand new concept, but these words coming from a Black woman was made relatable for other women of colour, including myself.

She beautifully sings lyrics such as “wanna be the type of girl you take home to your mama / the type of girl I know your fellas they’d be proud of” - SZA is specifically talking about how she doesn’t fit into society’s ideals and therefore doesn’t fit into the box of beauty that the guy she’s in love with has built. Feeling out of place is a common experience for many of us, but different chords are struck as a woman of colour navigating a world of white femininity and white beauty standards. 

One of my favourite things to do is to create playlists based on anything I'm currently enjoying. for example, I've made playlists relating to my favourite tv shows, like the cultural resets that were Gilmore girls, The Vampire Diaries and Pretty Little Liars.

As I previously mentioned, I might not be able to relate to every heartbreak the aforementioned artists have written and sung about, but when I listen to a song I make connections between the lyrics and these fictional characters I find comfort in. Almost every Taylor Swift song can effortlessly be used as narration of the Gilmore girls’ plot, proving that sad girl music serves and performs well in both the real and fictional worlds.  

Sad girl music doesn’t only explore love and the loss that comes with it, but also offers perspective on the world from multiple eyes. My first introduction to sad girl music was at eight years old - I had little to no experience with love or the world at the time, but the music touched me nonetheless. as Harper’s Bazaar writer Laia Garcia-Furtado put it, “it wasn’t long before I was enveloped in the universe of Sad Girl Music, a (derisive) term that some of the most brilliant female singer-songwriters in music history have been saddled with—women whose songs articulate the particular feeling of living in a constant state of awareness that the world is not a hospitable or fair place for anyone who refuses to serve the interests of the patriarchy.” 

It might be confusing to some (older generations, maybe) to hear that listening to sad girl music while sad to make us feel even more sad is a daily practice for a lot of us, but it brings comfort.

It covers us like a blanket of melancholy, allowing us to feel our feelings; acknowledge and recognize them while reveling in the satisfaction that somewhere, somehow, an artist was able to wiggle their way into our special and individual minds as listeners and find just the right ways to scratch the itch of the ever-present question: why? They’ve found ways to gather our thoughts and feelings, wrap it in a bow of lyrical genius and present the gift of sad girl music. 

[mgsdays]

do u know any other comics/BLs like 19days? #🥪

Hey dear!

Ohh that's a good question. I don't know any quite like 19 days, an ongoing story that is ultra slow burn. I have read some other amazing BLs though. Here's some that I like:

.

Totally Captivated

• Complete | 49 chapters plus some extras

• General vibe: humor, romance

If you like the mafia background of 19 days, an amazing manhwa is Totally Captivated. Lighthearted, fun and very hot 🔥 One character gives me strong He Tian vibes, both in appearance and in attitude. Plus, the main couple has some fantastic chemistry.

Summary: Jung Ewon has always let his curiosity get the best of him, but even he could not have predicted that his latest venture would lead to him working for the mafia.

After cheating on his boyfriend and consequently being dumped, Ewon longs for the two of them to reconcile. However, his ex's new boyfriend, the handsome Eun Mookyul, begins to take an interest in him. Finding Ewon intriguing, Mookyul, a mafia boss, decides that he wants Ewon to become his underling—and that's just the start of Ewon's problems.

As the new errand boy in Mookyul's gang, Ewon must now learn to navigate the dangerous world of the mafia all while resisting the advances of his ex-boyfriend's new lover. Should he give in to his desires, he will risk more than just another heartbreak.

At the End of the Road

• Complete | 57 chapters plus extras

• General vibe: dark themes, romance, plot heavy

The summary makes this one sound pretty complicated so I procrastinated checking it out for a bit. When I finally read it I was blown away. The plot is incredible, the romantic interest is ugh so good. The entire story leaves me with a warm feeling of destiny and serendipity. It gets dark and it demands quite a bit of attention but it is definitely worthwhile.

Summary: After a car accident, Taemin finds himself in the body of Siwon, a victim of bullying at school. No longer a pushover, he starts standing up for himself but then meets Woojin, an old friend from the past. Somehow, Woojin immediately picks up Taemin's 'scent' from Siwon. What happened between these two in the past and how will it affect their future?

Walk on Water

• Complete | 62 chapters

• General vibe: romance, hot sex

Ok, this one is a delight to read. It's another one of those "straight guy goes gay for the right guy" kind of plot, but it's beautifully done. The characters' progress feels authentic. You're on the edge of your seat rooting for them. Plus, the art is amazing?? I'd stop reading sometimes just to admire it. @ the artist you didn't have to go this hard and yet you did dude!! Fantstic job.

Plus the sex scenes are just on fire. Phew 🥵

Explicit sex so don't check it out if you're under 18, stay safe, yadda, yadda.

Summary: To earn money, Ed decided to enter the pornographic industry. Secretly, he begins working under the alias of "Tommy". One day, it was suddenly decided that he would be filming as a bottom instead of a top and he's doing it with the famous Glen McQueen as his partner?

No. 6

• Complete | 9 books or 9 mangas (I read the books actually, but the manga is the same story)

• General vibe: social commentary, romance, plot heavy

My all time favorite on the list might be No. 6. No. 6 reads more like 'social political commentary ft. a couple that happens to be boys', rather than a boys love story per see. The plot doesn't revolve around their romance, their romance is also happening in the midst of the chaos. And it is beautiful to watch.

Story wise, No. 6 is a dystopic tale, and it brings up themes of consumption under capitalism, outsourcing of labor, outsorcing of inequalities and goverment control. It's not recent so you might have read it already - if you haven't I can't recommend it enough.

A PERFECT LIFE, IN A PERFECT CITY

For Shion, an elite student in the technologically sophisticated city No. 6, life is carefully choreographed. School, study, and the occasional visit with his friend and classmate Safu. One fateful day, however, he takes a misstep, sheltering an injured boy his age from a typhoon. Known only as Rat, this boy is a VC – a fugitive living outside the computerized tapestry of city control – and helping him will throw Shion’s life into chaos and start him down a path to discovering the appalling secrets behind the superficial perfection of No. 6.

Seven Days

• Complete | 2 volumes

• General vibe: school life, romance

No way you haven't read this, but just in case: seven days!! Go check out seven days!! Seven Days is the BL. School life plots peaked with this one haha It's just two volumes and the story is beautifully done. I re-read from time to time when I want a pick me up.

Summary: On a whim, high school third-year Yuzuru Shino asks out first-year Toji Seryo, who is notorious for being a weeklong lover—he’ll date the first girl to ask him out Monday morning and then promptly dump her by the following Monday! The boys start dating, and by Tuesday, the first inklings of attraction hit. Can these two put words to their feelings before Monday comes, or are old habits too hard to break?

Blue Sky Complex

• Complete | 23 chapters

• General vibe: school life, humor, romance

Another school life story for the list. Blue Sky Complex has some truly hilarious moments, with teenage fumblings that ache with how true to life they are. Zero drama, zero outside interference, just the two main characters slowly (but surely) figuring things out.

Summary: Narasaki only wanted a place where he could sit and read books in peace, but was blackmailed by his teacher into supervising a delinquent called Terashima while working at the school library.

As they spend their days in silent but close proximity, they begin to feel drawn to each other. And then...

Doukyuusei

• Complete | 2 volumes (second is called Sotsugyousey)

• General vibe: lightehearted fun

Fun fact: I went to Japan once and I wanted to buy a book in Japanese just to have it, you know? I don't speak Japanese, I just wanted a book as a souvenir. I bought Doukyuusei. Clearly I'm biased towards this story in particular haha

Everything by this author is gold. Their art style flows, the characters have a certain lightness to them that makes them almost dance in the pages. The author usually draw at least one of the leads with long hair and the hair is so well done, GOD. I could gush about the hair all day.

Perhaps one of the most realistic ones of the list, Doukyuusei is a school life story about when you meet someone at just the right time.

Summary: "A boy boy met a boy. They were in the flush of youth. They were in love that felt like a dream, like sparkling soda pop."

High school students Hiraku Kusakabe and Rihito Sajou are as different as day and night. But opposites attract and before they know it, they've embarked on a journey neither one can quite define but which anyone with eyes can see is "Love."

Mo Dao Zu Shi

• Complete | 126 chapters

• General vibe: slow burn, historical, epic romance

At the risk of being very cliche here: if you haven't read Mo Dao Zu Shi, you're wasting time. Go. This one isn't a manga, but it a fantastic book. It became uber famous for a reason, you know? All the attention is very much deserved. I can't emphasize enough how good it is.

You can watch the TV show The Untamed as well (and the acting is fantastic) but, to me, the experience is just not the same. The TV show removes all explicit romance references from the story, in order to comply with China's censorship. The book leaves nothing out. It is very much a romance, through and through, and it's an epic one. There's slow burn, pining, misunderstandings, fighting everything and everyone for your loved one and coming out stronger on the other side. Truly worth the read.

As the grandmaster who founded the Demonic Path, Wei Wuxian roamed the world in his wanton ways, hated by millions for the chaos he created. In the end, he was backstabbed by his brother and killed by powerful clans that combined to overpower him. He incarnates into the body of a lunatic who was abandoned by his clam and is later, unwillingly, taken away by a famous cultivator among the clans — Lan Wanji. This marks the start of a thrilling yet hilarious journey of attacking monsters, solving mysteries, and raising children. From the mutual flirtation along the way, Wei Wuxian slowly realizes that Lan Wangji, a seemingly haughty and indifferent poker-face, holds more feelings for Wei Wuxian than he is letting on.

[smylealong]

The Long Ballad - thoughts

Just finished The Long Ballad and I have to say, I enjoyed it. Primarily because I went in with 0 expectations. After the brutal and fascinating journey that was Nirvana in Fire, I wanted something that did not require much thought and was enjoyable. And The Long Ballad delivered. I primarily went in for Liu Haikuan, knowing that he is a bit role, and I wasn't disappointed. I will discuss the details of the show below and because there are some spoilers, I will keep it under "keep reading"

PLOT: After the brutal death of her family, Li Changge (Dilraba Dilmurat) goes on a self-imposed exile. The story is about her journey. She goes from an angry, revenge-seeking princess to a woman who comes to see the bigger picture and finds inner peace and true love. This is also the story of Ashile Sun (Wu Lei), the battle-hardened war veteran who slowly comes to realize the futility of war and understand where true happiness lies. This is the journey of Leyan (Zhao Lusi), the soft, sheltered, shy princess who finds her own form of courage and strength. We also witness Hao Du (Liu Yuning), the cold-blooded, by-the-books soldier who falls head-over-heels in love with Leyan. There is also Wei Shu Yu (Alen Fang) who goes from being a useless waste of space to brotherzoning himself. (He does it all on his own. No one places him there.)

The series is adapted from the manhua "Chang Ge Xing" (长歌行) written by Xia Da (夏达). The manhua, apparently, got embroiled in some legal issues with its publishing company and is hence left incomplete. The team of Long Ballad got the writers, Chang Jiang and Pei Yu Fei on board and the duo did a commendable job in making changes in the characters and the story to deliver a complete package to the audiences.

The plot, while complex and layered, is also very sanitized. They touch upon fairly dark topics such as fratricide, human trafficking, slavery, biological warfare, and rape, but the topics are treated with kid-gloves. The rape, for example, is never shown. Only implied. This is a very important detail to remember while watching the show. Do not go in expecting a "Nirvana in Fire" or even "The Rebel Princess", you will be disappointed. Go in expecting a Young Adult story, and you will be rewarded.

CHARACTERS AND PERFORMANCES:

Li Changge: The protagonist of the story, Li Changge, starts as a boisterous, confident, but naive Princess. This is primarily her story, told mainly through her point of view. She goes from town to town, actively taking part in the governing of the cities/states. Fighting in wars, strategizing, making mistakes and learning from them. Finding both love and inner peace in the process. As you may have gleaned, the character is a bit of a Mary Sue, in the sense that she is almost perennially outsmarting everyone around her and people are constantly complimenting her on her smarts. That said, Changge does end up making a huge mistake and there are some serious consequences to her mistake, which decreases her Mary Sue-ness. The fact that not every man is falling for her like some other Mary Sues we know, coughA'Wucough, is also a HUGE positive. Dilraba Dilmurat does a commendable job as Li Changge and I don't really have anything negative to say about her performance.

Ashile Sun: He is the Tegin (General) of the Eagle Division of the Ashile Tribe and the foster son of the Great Khan of the Tribe. He is a fierce warrior and a quiet man whose perfectly ordered world is turned upside down upon meeting Li Changge. He is the hero of the story and is a character I enjoyed. Given his age, people did have some concern about Wu Lei portraying such a "masculine" character, but Wu Lei rose to the occasion spectacularly. I could discard Fei Liu (not an easy task, because damnit, I could still see the little murder puppy in some angles because the face is still the same, yet different), and see Ashile Sun instead, so full points to Wu Lei.

Li Leyan: Leyan starts as the soft and delicate princess who cannot stand up for herself. Her story is so beautifully shown. The way she comes to understand her country, her people, and learn true compassion is so beautifully shown that it really melted my heart. I loved the bits where she came in and Zhao Lusi embodied the character perfectly. Her love story was arguably the best thing in the story.

Hao Du: Meet the guy that stole the show. The stoic, cold-blooded, brutal warrior who is absolutely smitten with Li Leyan, the princess he is supposed to guard. Hao Du is a man of few words and Liu Yuning portrays the complex emotions with his expressions. He conveyed the cold and unfeeling mask, the pure love, the devotion, the heartbreak, and the complete surrender to Li Leyan - he showed it all. It was just... FABULOUS.

Wei Shu Yu: Meet the Ma Zitan of this story. Only, unlike Zitan who is both terrible and useless, Wei Shu Yu is just terribly useless. Alan Fang was reasonably good in portraying this nothing character. There is nothing else to say about him.

Ashile She Er: I have to talk about this character. He starts off as the rival to Ashile Sun, the petty guy who is there to make the hero look good. But slowly, we learn that deep inside, he is just a hurt and confused child who is looking for one person who would love and trust him for who he is. Not for his name, not for his title (Young Khan, ie, crown prince), or the power he wields. His relationship with Ashile Sun is the most complicated one of the story and he gets a beautiful character arc. Kudousi Jiang Ainiwaer portrayed the progression of the character convincingly.

The rest of the cast is adequate.

TECHNICAL DETAILS

OST: The OST is beautiful and is definitely worth a listen. My favorite track is the one sung by Liu Yuning. Man, the guy can sing!

Costumes: The costumes are not the best I have seen (NIF and JOL have spoiled me in that department), but they were not bad either. The fur on Ashile Sun's war costume, especially the one around his neck, made me want to itch my own neck, lol.

Cinematography: The long shots are done well, but the camera does switch angles a bit too often sometimes, which was rather distracting.

Graphics: Since the story is taken from a manhua, there are some scenes, especially the war scenes, that are shown in manhua panels. While this works, mostly, there are scenes where they become a tad comical. There are moments in the series where the graphics are in the background and a character is yelling some dialogue. NONE of those scenes worked. They were cringeworthy. Question to the writers: What do you have against boys aged eight to fourteen? Why did you do this to them?

OVERALL

Overall, I enjoyed the series. Was it the best I have ever seen? No. Definitely not. But this was not the worst either. The series is complete and does not leave any thread hanging or plot point unaddressed. The acting is adequate and I don't have any complains in that department. Yes, it was rather simplistic in its solutions and Changge does get some things done way too easily. The sanitizing of the more serious aspects can be off putting to the viewers expecting a dark, gritty tale. Go in with the expectation of watching a YA story, and you will be treated to an enjoyable one.

Final rating: 7 out of 10.

[wotchergiorgia]

my non-spoiler review of fantastic beasts: the secrets of dumbledore - and why you all should watch it

fantastic beasts: the secrets of dumbledore is just amazing. I have been about to sob for all over the film (heartbreaking moments, too much for my heart that wasn't ready for all of this).

Finally I had the magic. This was magic. Everything. The characters are awesome, beautifully written, beautifully interpreted. Jude Law is simply perfect as Dumbledore, and in this film you can perfectly see it. Mads Mikkelsen is wow. His Grindelwald has something that Depp's did not have, though I loved the original Grindelwald too. But, now, after have seen the film, I can't imagine someone who isn't Mads at the place of Grindelwald. Something of his face, maybe, of his deportment, of his attitude, his expression. And Grindelwald has to be like this: noble, apparently gentle, mysterious, charming. The plot, the landscapes, the fantastic beasts themselves... All of it.

Plot

This film had to do only one thing: tell us who Creedence is. And, guys, I swear to you that we all come to know the truth. And, as Jo Rowling has always done, it is upsetting, something I would have never thought about. But this film is not simply this: it is about Dumbledore, and, God, Albus Dumbledore is the absolute protagonist. Finally his story - as we knew it through the seventh hp book - is told, perfectly told. We can see, all over the film, Dumbledore's pain on Jude Law's face, his regret, his love, his agony. It is the real Dumbledore, the one I've always wanted to see on the screen: a man that has been wrong many times in his life, a man that can't forgive himself for what he did, but also a man pure of heart that constantly tries to fix where he went wrong. And that is the important thing - as Newt says at a certain point: to try. This is not the same complicated and confusing plot of the second film. This is linear, clair. This has an objective and a road to follow. It is a very political film and I loved it. There are the election of the leader of the entire wizarding community all over the world, there is the German Ministry of Magic, the French one, the Spanish one, the MACUSA, and Our Ministry of Magic, the English one, as we know it. And because of this context I can say that Mads Mikkelsen's Grindelwald is the perfect one. But I don't want to make a spoiler, so here I finished.

Characters

One of the flaws of the second fb, were the characters: the second fb introduced too many characters without giving them a story. Well, it doesn't happen here. A few main characters that we come to know as well as the original protagonists - Newt, Queenie, Tina and Jacob - and that give a plus to the plot. Lally, Theseus, Yousuf and Bunty: they are the other main characters apart from Dumbledore, Grindelwald, Credence and our group of friends. Lally is a badass teacher of Ilvermorny; Theseus, Newt's brother, is completely different from the arrogant and distant one we knew in the second film; Yousuf is, maybe, the more mysterious of the group; Bunty is a brave sweetheart. Together, they make up a perfect group. Then, there is Aberforth. Wow. I love how Richard Coyle and Jude Law brought the Albus-Aberforth relationship on the screen. Perfect. The perfect picture of their complicated brotherhood, as Jo Rowling told in the seventh hp book. Credence is "less important" compared to the first and the second film. Now that everyone knows who he is, the only thing left to do is trying to save him from Grindelwald - who seems less affectionate to him. Well, I can't stay here talking about the characters (even if it is my favorite thing to do), but I can say a thing: they are perfectly written and I love them all.

Fantastic Beasts

If the second fb has almost forgotten to put the fantastic beasts into his plot, here the fantastic beasts steal the scene. They are awesome. We see, obviously, Teddy and Pickett, but there is also a creature from the hp books that we have never seen in the films: the Blast-Ended Skrewt, a giant one. And then, a creature you'll all adore is the Quilin, one of the rarest creature of all the Wizarding World, that has a main role in the whole plot. Trust me, you can't miss the fantastic beasts at all.

The Blood Pact

This is how the second film comes to end: with the blood pact of Grindelwald and Dumbledore which seems impossible to destroy. And yes, this pact is central in this third film, until the end. Inside it there is a young and yet powerful magic, as we have never seen before.

Places

From New York to Berlin, from Great Britain to the mountain chain of Himalaya. Berlin in the early 1920s is beautiful and the magical Berlin is something sublime. And then there is Hogwarts. Our beautiful Hogwarts. I was about to sob when I saw it. Because, after all this time, after all these years, Hogwarts is still there for us. And it is true that Hogwarts will always be there, because even this time it is. And we're inside it, in the Great Hall, among the Hogwarts' students. And we need it. We deserved it. To come home. It brought us home. Again. One time and forever. Always. I did not want those Hogwarts scenes to end.

I don't know if I finished, but I'm not finished with this film. The music (guys, the music! Howard did a fabulous work with it. There are the classical fb tracks - New says goodbye to Tina, Jacob's bakery etc. - but also the classical hp tracks!)... And all the references to the hp books and film! WE CAME HOME WITH THIS FILM. WE REALLY DID. I loved every aspect of it. Every. From the start to the end. And then, the "always" reference. I adored it.

Feel free to send me asks, if you want to know anything. I'll answer as I can (if you want spoilers... Well, I'm an expert in spoilers, but also if you don't want them).

[buckysmischief]

they think my lover is strange

Loki x reader, soulmate au

Word Count: 1.4k

Summary: No wonder you didn’t find your soulmate sooner, he’s a damn god who lived in outer space.

Warnings: language, expected levels of angst topped with the right amount of fluff

AN: This is too late but it’s for @honeyvbarnes ‘s birthday challenge! I chose a soulmate au & this is my first attempt at one. I know she’s on a break but she knows it’s being uploaded and I REALLY HOPE YOU LOVE IT VI! // I listened to a lot of Halsey while writing this, this is a lil inspired :)

Masterlist

Even in a world where soulmates exist, almost ruling out any unnecessary heartbreak, you still had to work for it. Who said it was easier, anyways? Whose bright idea was it to have your soulmates name show up on your wrist? And just to make things more complicated, it wasn’t always their first name. See, fate was a funny thing.

About a year after you’re born a name would show up on your wrist, obviously the name of your soulmate, and when you found each other the letters would change from black to a new, random color. Half would get the others' first name beautifully displayed on their skin, and while that’s still pretty difficult, it wasn’t as confusing as having your soulmate's last name on you.

It was easy to find out someone’s first name, you just introduce yourself and if that’s your person, then BOOM instant love. But if you have their last name on your wrist, it wasn’t that easy. Not many people were interested in giving out their whole name to a stranger who will most likely not be their soulmate. You, unfortunately, were among the half with a .

Odinson. What kind of a name is that anyway?

You used to think that it could be easy to find your soulmate, all you’d have to do it Google the name. But when you didn’t find anything you could actually go on, you decided it was best to just let fate do its thing. Maybe taking a year to travel the world, because that’s definitely not an american name, could have been seen as taking the wheel, but you were no closer than you were before.

After college you took a job at Stark Industries working with Tony himself as his personal lab assistant. Not only did Tony give you permission to work on whatever you wanted in your free time, but it also allowed you to meet all kinds of people without having to disrupt your routine. There was no way whoever this Odinson is is a normal person, it was something you’ve always been so sure about but never could explain it to others. It wasn’t until the day after the battle of New York did you find out just how right you were.

You got a call from Tony saying you had the rest of the week off but you elected to ignore him. No way you were turning down uninterrupted lab time. Once you got into the lab you couldn’t help but notice the alien weaponry on Tony’s side, what was he planning on doing with all of it? He’d likely ask you to assist, so you’d find out eventually. You finally got to your desk and started organizing your notes and important documents.

Hours had passed and you didn’t even realize it. So when you turned around to found a strange muscular man studying you, you freaked the fuck out. “Oh my GOD you can’t just do that! Who are you!?” you yelled at the stranger.

His demeanor never changed, “My name is Thor O-” he stopped himself. “I’m a friend of Stark.”

He wasn’t meant to bring Loki back for another day or so, Tony wanted to ask some questions and run a few tests, all which Thor agreed to. So while Tony was attempting to know Loki better, he decided he’d explore the tower. What he didn’t expect to find was to see you through the glass, reading so intently he was positive you never blinked. If anyone asked him why he originally felt compelled to talk to you, he’d tell them he was just following his gut. But when he was coming up behind you, he saw your soulmark. His name.

Only a few minutes had passed while he thought of what to do. He didn’t think for a second that he was your soulmate, he knew he wasn’t - after meeting Jane the year before both of their soulmarks turned deep red. Which could only mean one thing, you were Loki’s. He tried to recall a memory where he saw the name that belonged to his brother, but it didn’t exist. By the time Thor paid attention to those kinds of things, Loki used his magic to cover his mark.

He was just about to announce himself when you turned around and screamed. When you asked his name, he caught himself before he gave you false hope. No, he wanted you and Loki to share that moment. The moment where you told him your name and all of his walls fall, a moment that has nothing to do with being the God of Mischief or the brother of Thor. After he found out the truth behind Loki’s attack, he hoped finding you would change him into the man he was meant to be. Otherwise, why wouldn’t it read Laufeyson?

“Oh, I’m sorry.” you stood up to shake his hand. “My name is Yn, I’m Tony’s personal- wait, you fought alongside Tony right? What the hell was all that!?”

Thor thought about giving you details about his heroics against an alien army, but he had a better idea. “I have someone I want you to meet, he can explain it better.”

You followed him to the elevator and took it to the underground levels, to the floor where Tony tests some of his inventions. When the doors opened, you noticed Tony sitting in front of a man inside of a glass box, which you’d eventually learn was an Asguardian cell. If you worked anywhere else, you’d be concerned, but you trusted Tony and his process.

“Ah, Yn, you found Thor. Why am I not surprised?” he laughed, eyes never leaving the man in the chair. So when he noticed Loki’s eyes land on you after he said your name, he got curious. “Hey, Yn. This is Loki, he’s as interesting as they come. Ask him something, see if he answers for you.”

“Mmm,” you didn’t have to ask the obvious, he was obviously behind the attack. Asking him why would be smart, but this guys not from here, and you could ask him anything. “Why’d you do it.”

His eyes never left yours, and you didn’t know how that made you feel until he spoke for the first time. He smirked, “That’s not what you’re interested in, now is it, love? Ask me the question you really want, I promise it’ll be worth it.”

“What’s-” you cut yourself off. “If Loki is your first name… what’s, what’s your last name…?”

Thor and Tony didn’t miss the way you had begun to gravitate to the younger god, now close enough to touch the glass. He put his left arm against the glass, magic disappearing to show your name as he answered, “Odinson. My name is Loki Odinson.”

“Hi,” you whisper. “I’m Yn.”

Never did you think your soulmate would be anything like the man standing in front of you, he was beyond everything you knew to be possible. You spent the whole night down there getting to know him, and when Tony came in the next morning to find you both asleep next to each other with only the glass separating you, he wasn’t surprised. It still took Thor hours to convince him to let Loki out of the cell, but he did. Under the condition that the two of you were not to be alone.

When Thor opened the door, Loki took a second to thank him, that’s all the time he had before you were pulling him close to you. He picked you up and effortlessly wrapped you around him, only wishing to hold you close and breath in your scent. “I was beginning to believe I’d never find you, my love.”

“Well you did, and you brought an army.” you laugh into the crook of his neck. “My soulmate’s a big dummy.”

Thor didn’t expect Loki to be offended by the comment, not from you. No, he expected his brother to pretend to be offended, but instead laughter filled his ears. Genuine, heartfelt laughter he hadn’t heard from his brother since they were young.

He put you back down and cupped your face, “It seems you’re right, Yn.” Before you fully registered what he had said, his lips were on yours, kissing you like he needed you to breathe. Much to your disappointment, though, Loki pulled away, looking at you as if you hung each star in the galaxy.

“So, love, how do you feel about being a Queen?”

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