#gravity falls weirdmageddon | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jeanystillbeany · 11 hours

Text

BillFord Fic

I haven’t gotten invited to ao3 yet so I’ll just post it here anyway. It doesn’t have a name so I’ll just post a teaser or whatever. Idfk. It’s a billford fic ig. As soon as I get ao3 I’ll post it on there. I do have more written. I’m just taking the first part for a test drive. Let me know ur thoughts! (Literally anything- name suggestions scene suggestions, if i should post it on ao3, explanations etc.)

Entry 167: Series 6

Out of all the curiosities I’ve studied in my travels, this has to be one of the most shocking enigmas yet. This timeline had the bottom story of the shack left with two gaping holes at the top. In fact, it’s as though the shack grew legs and walked away. Which is completely bizarre- even for a weirdness magnet such as Gravity Falls, Oregon. The countless timelines I’ve visited so far were nowhere near this level of insanity. This level of… intrigument. The state of the timeline has this enrapturing effect on me.

Recently the timelines I’ve been traveling through have had a different variable. Two in fact. As it turns out, me and my brother have a great-grandniece and nephew. Dipper and Mabel. While I’ve been careful to not interact with any timelines I’ve found myself caught up in (especially after that incident with the Time Police), I still somehow find myself growing attached to the two. For the past few months I’ve been observing them through the different timelines I’ve traveled to. There has also been the reoccurring pattern of their other ‘Gruncle’ re-emerging from the same portal I find myself appearing from every few days. I’ve been waiting… counting down the days til it’s my turn. And yet, I still don’t understand why I continue to keep that false hope in my pocket. The multiverse is infinite. The chances of me ever finding my home universe is nearly pointless. While I could always take the place of another Stanford… The Time Police would be on my case in a second. I also understand that the multiverse I was sent to wasn’t the same one as the other Stanfords. While I’m dealing with infinites of my brother, they were dealing with beasts beyond basic human comprehension… and yet I’d much rather that than to be cursed knowing I’d never get home. To see Dipper and Mabel fail… over and over… with myself unable to assist… sometimes I thought it was driving me mad.

I’ve certainly spent more time reciting the last few entries than I should’ve. So I shall continue with the present. The shambles of my lab have made for an adequate shelter. (Save for the 2 overgrown hairless mole rats I’ve needed to fight off for my rations). The sky appears to be a blood red, many of the familiar surrounding trees were reduced to brambles, probably by some larger species I’d like to take the time to investigate at a later hour. This area has been intensely modified compared to the other Gravity Falls I’ve been in. I have a hunch this is due to the large vortex that ripped through the dimension. (That was in fact sarcasm my dear reader). So far I’ve studied and dissected one of those overgrown Eye-Bats that can turn a person to stone just by looking at them. From memory; I will promise they were much smaller and could not turn one to stone in my own timeline. Why would anyone feel the need to weirdify these anomalies? Some sort of apocalypse has settled over this world. Whether or not it was always like this is unknown. I’m leaning towards the latter though. I shortly ran out of things to do after examining my last two specimens and I itched for more information on these preternatural creatures.

Ford sat in what was left of his desk chair and kicked his feet up. He would kill for a mug of coffee right now.

Ford ran a hand through his hair. Since the portal incident, he’s grown it out. He’s grateful he didn’t cut it when he could. It more than likely would’ve exaggerated the up and coming gray hair. Though… he shouldn’t exactly care how he looks because he’s not supposed to be seen in other timelines according to the Time Police. In the end, he still does get a fond satisfaction of knowing he’s at least well kept. And mistakes happen. He continues to have the same clothing pattern of turtle necks- though he only ever wears them underneath his long coat. It proved to be very useful when traveling timelines. The amount of pockets he had to keep so many samples in almost seemed like cheating. He also always had his bag with him. Most of his pockets aren’t big enough for his journal, and he’s filled up a couple while he was traveling timelines. His love of pockets also extended to his lower half making sure to have maximum pockets on his cargo pants. He even bothered with a hidden one in his shoe for an emergency lock pick. If that wasn’t enough, his obsession with Sci-Fi led to him wanting to live it to its full extent, so naturally he put knives in both heels of his boots as well.

Normally he’d care that there were some contaminated combat boots being rubbed all over his desk. But now? He thought he might as well embrace the end of the world. He loved his family to death, but if any of them saw him in a timeline other than his origin the whole universe would collapse in on itself, and they would be the ones dead. Ford could always scramble back to his portal and go to the next timeline. According to the Time Police that is. Though there have been many instances where he has intervened in his earlier days with no consequence.

The man mindlessly fiddled with his gun on the inside pocket of his coat. He wanted to study more. Maybe the giant gash in the sky was the root of his greatest mystery! He unhooked his heels from the edge of his desk and swung them around towards the bunker hatch. He pushed himself off from the armrests of the chair. Stanford climbed up the ladder and popped his head out of the bunker. He supposed the first step would be to find a lookout point. If he was lucky he might be able to stay in one place long enough to do a quick sketch of this timeline’s situation. The first place Stanford’s mind drifted was his abandoned UFO- though it was identified and no longer flying, so he dubbed it the alien spacecraftt. It gave a perfect view of the entire town and was rather close to his current position. Ford gave a once over of everything in his satchel. He plucked out his journal in order to sift through the small bit of food, water and any other trinkets he had before neatly replacing it and went on his way.

As Ford traveled he kept a hand on his gun. Aside from the terrors the scientist was getting antsy to encounter, he was the only other sound he heard. His boots trudged along the ground -making distinct squishing sounds- as though he were walking in his own wet socks. The ground beneath him was unnaturally wet causing the uncomfortable feeling. There was the occasional shuffle as he adjusted his jacket to the odd temperatures. Ford made a mental note to journal about the seemingly miniature air masses that drastically changed the temperatures in as little as every few feet he walked. The long coat was currently adjusted to be draped over his shoulders, as Ford found this to be a happy medium and made a constant grip on his gun easier.

A rumble struck the ground just as Ford’s own foot hit the earth. The man felt a jitter course through him, crawling up his spine.

“Another weirdness wave!” The man exclaimed with much more enthusiasm than anyone else trapped in this hell bubble ever would. He licked the first two of his fingers and raised them up in the air, turning them at different angles until he found the direction that gave his moistened fingers the most chill. After finding the wind direction he quickly hid behind a tree and scrambled through his bag. His six-fingered hand reemerged with a sort of hand made device. It was made from old lab parts created during his first few days in this timeline. It allowed him to calculate the intensity of the weirdness wave and further study its properties. He carefully placed the machine away from the cover of the tree and braced himself for things to get weird.

The wave passed over Stanford relatively easily and he observed no mutations to himself. Stanford went to pick up his wave reader when-

“Oh. How peculiar… Shit.” The man’s handmade invention had grown to compete with the surrounding forest’s pine trees. For a moment the Author thought that he would be unable to run. For a moment the Author believed he was frozen in time. For a moment he saw himself as a child. For a moment he saw his brother. For a moment he saw the twins.

Stanford found the right gears that made the joints in his legs move. This was no longer his invention. It had grown six legs of its own. The calculator screen that was once used as a makeshift reader display was its mouth and the antenna was its tongue. Ford was tempted to take a picture, though he doubted such would be worth his life. He raced through the forest. It was almost as if its size grew due to this oddity apocalypse. The scientist didn’t have a chance. Every time he heaved himself over a log, the creature could bash itself right through it after him. He needed to think of something… he’d kill to meet his niece and nephew.

The Author took out his loaded gun as he ran through the brambles. He took a sharp turn, causing the monster to slide in an effort to regain its balance. Ford began to aim as the creature was tipped onto its side. It landed with a loud thump, causing multiple mutated birds to fly away startled. Stanford lowered his gun and stood stunned in front of his creation, as its legs flailed about, damaging the surrounding shrubbery.

“Intriguing!” Ford quickly snapped a picture. As much as he’d like to inspect the helpless thing more, he deemed it safer to continue with his original task. He would’ve stayed longer if one of the monster’s legs didn’t reach out and claw at his coat, tearing it down its side. A bit closer and the scientist would’ve been seriously injured. He jumped back and continued with his task of sketching this new timeline. He also made a mental note to log his encounter in the journal when he was in the clear.

He finally made it to the spacecraft. Ford would definitely consider using this as a hideout in this world. Contrary to Ford’s belief, the state of this timeline was only in Gravity Falls. He remembers studying the Natural Law of Weirdness Magnetism as a younger man, but he never believed it could affect anything to this extent. Ford sat down atop the spacecraft. He snapped a picture of the surrounding scene.

Entry 167 B. Series 6

There seemed to be a large barrier encasing Gravity Falls. More than likely the Natural Law of Weirdness Magnetism. I’ve studied the topic before and have come up with a simple equation to break it. The scene before me is both exhilarating and dread ensuing. To even think about the situations my brother and the kids have gone through haunts me. I want nothing more than to be able to talk with them. Even if it’s not my universe. I want to hear their stories and watch them grow up… I wish for my own universe. I’ve traveled the timelines for much too long. I’ve watched them. But I want to see them. To meet my Mabel, my Dipper, my Stanley. I want to meet my family. But where would I even start? The time police?

I looked off to the sunless horizon and noticed a large pink orb sitting dead center of the train tracks with Mabel’s zodiac on it. My breathing sputtered. Just what were these kids into this timeline? I decided it’d be best to head back to the lab. I’d like to be there when the portal reopens.

Maybe… maybe I can try one more time. My sentence is already high enough as it is with the Time Police… I want to help my niece and nephew… no matter what universe they’re in. There has to be a reason the Time Police aren’t on my tail by now… especially after that monster was created. I’ll spend the night at the lab again and work on relocating to the spacecraft tomorrow. Then I’ll find my brother.

Ford replaced his bookmark into his journal and brushed himself off. He stood up on the roof of the dead spaceship and gave one last glance at the world he found himself in before beginning the few hour trek to where the Mystery Shack once stood. Stanford was nearly to his hideout. About where he left the wave reading monster. There was one problem that had unnerved the Author for more than one reason. A question that bubbled out of his mouth as soon as he seen the large clearing in the trees where the monster had been discarded.

“Where is it?” His question was shortly answered as a screech was heard not too far behind him.

“Fuck! Are you Serious?!” The scientist grumbled and quickened his pace. It was following him. Either it had extremely sensitive hearing or it was tracking him by scent. Whatever the case was, his hands itched to jot it down in his journal. He didn’t have much time for that as he found himself being chased by the beast once again. Ford continued to race to the lab and attempted to slide into the underground space. The mechanical creature’s claw lurched out and nicked his back, sending him flying forward and creating another large hole in the roof. He landed ungraciously on the floor of his lab with a groan. As a last resort Ford turned over on his back and began shooting wildly through the crack. The mechanical anomaly screeched as it was shot at, retreating immediately. Ford felt the back of his coat begin to soak and his vision blur. The tips of his finger began to numb as his arm fell to the ground.

With one last screech, a fourth hole was punctured into the top of the lab, right over the portal, leaving Ford’s escape in shambles. He would’ve screamed, or yelped with his hand held out dramatically as any Author such as himself would, but that was the last sight seen before he passed out completely.

“Do you think it’s dead?”

“I say we eat it”

“Dudes. Is it just me? Or does it kinda look like Mr. Pines.”

“Soos. It has SIX FINGERS! SIX! It had to be some sort of clone… or- or… imposter.” Pages began to flip in the background of the following commotion. Quiet muttering was also heard following each turn of paper- though it was mostly blocked out by the pounding in Ford’s head.

“Mr. Pines… do you… know anything about this?” Ford was becoming conscious enough to pick out voices. This seemed to be the only female among the group.

“Stanford…?” This was a new voice. Much older than the others. It wavered as it said his name- effectively snapping him out of the painful slumber he was in.

Ford started with a groan and his eyes squinted shut, adjusting to the abnormal light- even for the living world. In this universe that is.

“Dudes. It’s waking up.” Ford mumbled and rubbed his head. Thankfully the wound on his back didn’t go that deep into his back. Though the semi-dried blood latching the fabric of his coat to himself was very uncomfortable.

“Sixer!” Stanford opened his eyes just in time to see the back of a tacky red hat by the side of his head. Arms enveloped his shoulders partially helping Ford keep himself up.

“Stanley…” The scientist just barely breathed out.

“STANLEY?!” Ford couldn’t be bothered to look up from his brother’s shoulder at the other’s exclaimation

“Is anyone else confused right now? Cause I’m confused.” Soos commented. Stanley sighed before releasing his disoriented brother.

“Kids, Soos, I want you to meet… the author of the journals.” Stan was hesitant to let go of his brother, as though if he let go of his brother’s shoulder he’d disappear back into the fabrics of existence. Dipper did an excited squeal and almost ran up to properly greet his practical obsession, but Wendy put a calm hand on his shoulder to stop him from ruining the two brothers' moment. She decided she needed more context with her boss’ secret twin before Dipper butted in.

“Stanley. I need- I need to tell you something.” Stanford’s voice wavered with guilt. As multiple scenarios ran through his head. More than likely this wasn’t his universe. He doesn’t know what happened to his own timeline, or this one… though it’s not like he can continue traveling timelines with the portal busted. Ford opened his mouth to speak- but no sound came out as a thought surfaced to his head.

‘…what if this is my timeline? What if the portal busted for a reason? Maybe… I can stay a while. They need my help…’

“Yeah?” Stanley asked- a small smile almost suppressed on his face.

“…I missed you.” Ford sighed out. He pulled Stan back into him. The other man slapped his back playfully with a goofy grin. Ford winced and let out a small yelp.

“Oh… forgot about that. Welp. I smiled too little in the past 3 weeks to smile this much now. Let’s get back to the shack.” As if on queue, an ominous roar shook the ground under them.

“Agreed.” Wendy said.

“Yup, yup, yup, let’s go!” Soos hauled Dipper over his shoulder and sprinted out of the Lab and everyone else followed. Ford found himself lingering for a moment- his eyebrows furrowed as he stared at the remains of his portal. It’s gone. It’s all gone.

“Hey, bro. Let’s get out of here, ‘k?” Stanley put his hand on Ford’s shoulder, offering a hopefully comforting smile.

“We have a lot to talk about Stanley…” Similar to any other earth tremble, the earth shook following the signs of a beast approaching.

“Yeah, yeah. Can we do that later?” Stanley tugged his brother along by the back of his coat leading him out of the lab. Stanford followed behind- occasionally wincing from the pulling on his jacket.