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justwonder113 · 3 years

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Haikyuu boys when you can't sleep-part 2

INCLUDES: Kuroo Tetsuro, Suna Rintaro

PART 1; PART3

WARNINGS: some cusswords, I don't know if it can be triggering to someone but in kuroo's part reader is freezing and there's a joke about lighting yourself on fire to warm up, idk better safe than sorry!

Kuroo Tetsuro

When you looked at the clock last time it read 4 am, you wondered how much time would pass until you would finally manage to fall asleep. You were really tired and you had many things to do tomorrow too and you needed energy for it. But life decided to be a bitch and your heater broke making you stay in this miserable state in this cold ass winter night.

You threw on your warmest clothes and covered yourself with as many blankets but nothing seemed to warm you. You were shaking uncontrollably and you were hitting your teeth against each other so hard you were starting to get worried if by the morning they would be whole.

Honestly you were running out of ideas, it was like you were in the middle ground. You could neither fall asleep nor stay awake. You even tried giving up on the idea of sleeping and tried to make yourself busy, but you couldn't put your heart to anything. You had to read the same sentence just for it to make sense, your mind kept drifting to different subject and so on and so on.

At some point you also thought going to Kuroo for help, but you quickly threw away the idea. As much of a close friends you two were, it would still be weird to ask him to cuddle you so you could get warm and finally fall asleep no matter how desperate you were.

You felt safe and comfortable with him, that's why you were living with him after all, you two also cuddled from time to time on the couch or whenever one of you wanted comfort. Physical contact was not new, but sleeping together on the same bed seemed really intimate. You were sure Kuroo would agree and let you in his room and in bed and he would also cuddle you for whole night if you asked him, you didn't doubt that for a second, but you were not sure how it would affect your friendship.

You were mostly worried about yourself, because your head and your heart were in a mess and you were unsure about your feelings towards Kuroo, that's why you were so uncertain and alert around him.

It was a matter of time before he would approach about you, you just knew he had already noticed the change in your demeanor and it was making you worried.

You bit your lip in frustration, how long would this go on? You were feeling mad at everything including yourself for being so confused and lost. You were very tired and cranky.

When the clock hit 5 am you decided to fuck it and got up. You wobbly walked out of your room and stood in front of kuroo's and stood in front of it. You were sure he was dead asleep, he wasn't even visible in that pile of pillows. It was still a mystery to you how he managed to breathe like that. You felt bad, he slept so peacefully, he would be comfortable too, he always complained about the heat and always preferred the cold too. Maybe you were being selfish now, he must have been really tired too you were not the only one with ton of studying to do.

But you felt desperate, you were feeling lightheaded, your body was extremely drained, all these allnighters really took toll on you. You deeply craved to rest even for a while.

You felt hesistant, but you still decided to go for it. You knocked on the door, and softly called out to him. When he didn't even stirr, you thought again to go back, one more night without sleep was nothing right? Maybe you could try one last time, if he didn't respond you would return to your bed or light yourself on fire. It didn't really matter now.

"Tetsu?" You softly called his name and this time he did stirr.

"Y/N? What's wrong?" He shuffled a bit and straightened up. You went to him, he looked at you with confused eyes yet kept checking if everything was alright.

"I'm sorry to wake you up, but can I sleep with you tonight? It's freezing in my room and no matter what I do I can't get warm." You explained to him and waited for an answer. Kuroo only nodded and moved to give you space to crawl in. You got next to him but your body was stiff, you were unsure what to do.

"What are you doing come closer, you're basically a popsicle!" Kuroo grumbled sleepily and dragged you closer to him. He made you lay your head on his arm as he wrapped it around your back, he then made you lay your hands under his shirt so he could warm it. But as soon as made contact with his skin, he flinched really hard, making you feel bad. "You dummy, if you were freezing this much you should have come sooner!" He wrapped his other arm around you too and tangled his legs with yours, and now you felt like you could breathe again. He also kept rubbing his hands steadily on your skin to heat you up a little. It was already so much more comfortable!

"Thanks Tetsu, it's already so much better." You smiled and snuggled against him, he only chuckled and kissed the top of your head.

"Glad to be of help babe, now sleep, you must be tired." You could feel that he looked at you carefully, "You worked really hard, you deserve to rest." He spoke lowly and honestly it sounded so hot it was giving you butterflies. "You can sleep here until we fix the heater, or whenever you like honestly. I can even sing you lullabies until you fall asleep too, but honestly you don't even have to wake me up just come here whenever you feel like it." His words were so slurred you were sure he would fall back asleep anytime now, yet you wondered how even in this state did he manage to charm you so flawlessly?

He kept rubbing tiny circles on your skin until he made sure you were asleep, or that's what he thought, as much comfortable you felt it would be impossible for you to fall asleep immediately, for starters your mind was going crazy. You were basically engulfed by him, you could freely smell his shower gel on him as well smell of pines and spice he always had naturally. Your whole body felt fluttery, you didn't even realize you had it this bad for him, but how could you not? Not only he was really attractive and charming, he was also really sweet and kind and really treated you so well!

It seemed like he was sure you were asleep so he hugged you tighter and lovingly stroked your hair, you could feel his gaze was on you, it felt so i tense yet really warm.

"Man what are you doing to me do you even have any idea?" You wanted to say something to him even though you had no idea what to say, Kuroo only leaned in and lovingly kissed your forehead. You felt so thankful it was dark in the room, otherwise it would be so noticeable just how much trouble you had collecting yourself. Jeez how could he be this adorable without even trying?

Based on the way his breathing evened out he must have fallen asleep and you felt like tou could finally breathe again. You looked at him closely he really was asleep. Could you really assume he liked you? You sighed softly and snuggled against him.

You were still unsure about your feelings and where you and Kuroo stood, but you were sure that no matter what you would be fine as long he was with you.

Suna Rintaro

You didn't even know what time it was, you just knew you had to keep on working on this project untill you finished with it.

You already felt like you were burning in time, you couldn't afford to get distracted now. You had to get at least most of it done so you could have at least some time to work on it and make changes if it needed any.

In reality you were really anxious, your head was a mess and it felt like you were running only on countless energy drinks you consumed. Just why did this project have to be so hard and difficult? It was all you could think about and it was so stressing you couldn't even pay attention to anything else and yes that also included your own friends family and even your boyfriend.

You wondered how he was fearing, You hadn't contacted him since morning and it was only a breath conversation too. Basically it consicted of him checking on how were you doing. He also had a big game coming up and you were so engulfed in your work you didn't even have time to comfort and encourage him.

You looked at the clock, it read 1a.m. You choked up, you wanted to cry, you felt so stressed! You only wanted to be in your boyfriend's arms, you wanted to feel at ease. You already felt like you were incompetent due to the hard time you were having, you felt like you were a bad partner, a bad friend a bad child to your parents...

You sighed, it was no use in bitching you had to get yourself together and get work done.

You took a deep breath continued with the work, trying not to pay attention to anything else.

You didn't know how much longer were you working, but you were interrupted when you heard a doorbell. You were confused,who could it be at this hour?

You were pleasently startled with the image of your boyfriend. You immediately swung open the door and basically jumped on him.

"Easy there tiger, I'm holding the food." He warned you but he didn't make any move to let you go. He held you close to him as if he was trying to savour the moment.

"What are you doing here?" You were dumbfounded, the least thing you expected was to see him here at this ungodly hour.

"I was craving fastfood."he said as if it was the most obvious thing ever. He lead you through the apartment and sat on the couch, you in his lap. "I saw that you were still online on Spotify and I just knew that you would still be working your butt off on that dumb project most likely managing to forgetting to eat and hungry too so here I am. Your knight in shining armour."

"I don't know if I should be pleased or irritated from how you phrased it, but I'm hungry as hell so I'll let it pass this time." You grumbled annoyed and leaned in to get the bag, Suna only smiled softly and kissed your cheek.

"I'm only surprised you're being cooperative, I thought I would have to fight you to eat your food, you're no fun, I was ready to wrestle you." He teased, making you stick your tongue at him.

"I was about to get some food and anyway, you're just in time." You smiled and gave him food. But he barely ate anything, he was mostly watching you with careful eyes, while he was stroking your hair, making you feel more eased and relaxed. You felt so thankful he came.

"Will you stay the night?"

"Yeah, I don't feel like walking home." You smiled and kissed him softly.

"you're free to do whatever you want but just so you know I still need to get back to my work." Suna only nodded, you gave him a weak smile and got up. You felt really bad but you had to finish your project. Suna got up too and took his hoodie off giving it to you.

"You'll be more comfortable in this." You smiled at him and took off your jacket and let him put the hoodie on, which was so warm and smelled like him too it only made you want to curl up and not get up. Your eyes were really irritated and tired too, you craved nothing more than good night's sleep.

You were about to thank him for the hoodie but he yanked on the ties of the hoodie making it close around your face, you wanted to Voice your complaint but he also didn't let you do that as he threw you around his shoulder romantically like you were sack of potatos and started walking.

"What are you doing?" You struggled against him.

"Stop or I'll drop you!" He warned you but you only huffed.

"try me bitch!" You were not willing to give in that easily.

"Okay." He said and he really dropped you, on bed but still! You wanted to fight but he decided to be a dick and lied on you, almost squishing you. He held you tightly and layed his head on your chest, he was really going to sleep!

"God Rin you're killing me!" You squirmed.

"Okay."

"I really have to work on that project!" You whined yet again but it was no use.

"it's sounds like a you problem!" You tried to fight some more but it was no use he wasn't even going to budge.

"you're infuriating you know that?" You couldn't help but feel annoyed, you wanted to be done with the project today, it was weighting you down enough already. But your boyfriend apparently had other plans.

"Don't even try anything, you look like a ghost! I'm not letting you continue working." You wanted to say something but you couldn't come up with anything.

"I need to pee?" You tried to reason.

"Go for it, at least we'll be warm!" Suna replied without missing a beat making you groan.

"You're really annoying right now!"

"But you love me." The last comment made your resolve crack, as much frustrated you felt, this was what you needed the most right now. You smiled and kissed his forehead, he smiled softly and snuggled more to you. He must have missed you a lot.

"Yeah I do." You pecked him again and got more comfortable, the project could wait a little.

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medcrastination · 2 years

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I've heard that medical colleges have a really toxic environment atleast a thousand times. But now I've to live it myself. And god, could i agree more. Some days are good but other days go by like hell. Lemme tell you glimpse of some of the days I've had recently. Woke up at 7, attented the extremely boring classes in which i understood nothing, but had to attend for attendance, these lectures are so boring mostly because professors are not very keen to teach most of the times, they just want the topic to get over. After these lectures, went for small group discussions ( sgd) and got scolded for not knowing a few complicated things I've been reading for the first time in my life or for not remembering 1 out of hundreds of anatomical terms we've to memorise. Also got the result back of an exam for which I've studied a lot, even pulled many allnighters and yet failed. Then attended a practical, in which got insulted badly for making some silly mistake, or not completing the files on time. Got back to hostel after 8 hours of tiresome day, but can't rest because had to go for the practice of college society I had joined, practice sessions usually go on for 3/4 hours. Got badly insulted there too by seniors for unintentionally hurting their feeble ego in some way. Got back to hostel room. Cried for half hour. Had to hold back tears just to complete an assignment that's due Midnight. Got a call from home, had to give a excuse of catching cold for the heavy voice due to all crying and tiredness. Studied a bit more for some time. Went to bed around 2 am. But couldn't be able to sleep after the shitty day. Then tried to read a book, failed at it too due to disturbed mind. Then head to tumblr to rant it all out. It's 2.25 am. Yes still sad about that day.

#med school #medblr #stress #depressing post

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animatedarchives · 4 years

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CHEMISTRY

— 𝐊𝐔𝐑𝐎𝐎 𝐓𝐄𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐑𝐎

author’s note: hi guys! this is based off of a conversation i had with @velvetfireworks about dozing off in class hehe ^^ it’s pretty cringey and cheesy but i thought it was cute :> enjoy!~

genre: fluff

warning: none, just school being sucky and some nerdy chemistry puns bc i love science

word count: 1.7k words

“Each carbon atom is sp3 hybridised and covalently bonded to four other carbon atoms to form a tetrahedral structure, making it insoluble in water and...”

I’m so tired.

The lecturer droned on and on in his awfully monotonous voice, his words going right over your head. You rubbed your face exasperatedly and sat up straight in your chair, trying your best to stay awake.

Maybe you should have gotten more rest last night. But how could you? Especially given all the assignments that were due this week. You groaned. Either way, you just wanted this class to be over.

Your eyes flicked to the clock mounted on the wall at the front of the hall, watching painfully as it ticked at an agonisingly slow pace.

Just… half an hour more…

You shook your head to will the sleepiness away, tightening the grip on your pen as you attempted to listen to the lecture once more. But the exhaustion from your allnighter last night was too much, and it fizzled out any determination you had to stay awake. Your body seemed to act against the pleas of your mind, and your eyelids slowly began to droop.

No! Need to... listen… to...

Your eyes eventually drifted shut and you felt instant relief wash over you. As much as you wanted to stay awake, you had no more energy to pry your eyelids apart.

Okay… Maybe just… five minutes…

You leaned back in your chair and gave in to your exhaustion, letting yourself be overtaken by sleep.

A few minutes passed and finally, you began to stir, your brain slowly starting back up again after your short nap.

Mmm, my pillow… So soft… Maybe I can sleep for a while longer— Wait.

Your eyes snapped open.

I don’t have a pillow.

You rubbed your face sleepily and assessed your situation, your eyes widening in horror as you realised you had ended up falling asleep on the shoulder of the person next to you.

“Oh my- I am so sorry!” you jerked away from them, the top of your head colliding with their chin.

“Ow-”

“SORRY SORRY SORRY, I’M SO SORRY!” you apologised profusely.

In your frenzy, you knocked your pencil case off your table, sending your stationery flying. You cursed under your breath and fumbled around, trying to get your things — and yourself — together. The stranger bent down and helped to pick up some of your pens, and although you were grateful, it deepened the guilt you felt in the pit of your stomach for causing them so much inconvenience.

“I’m so sorry,” you repeated again, turning to face him.

He chuckled. “For a smart girl, you sure have some limited vocabulary,” he said, approaching you and handing you back your pens. You scoffed at the backhanded compliment but kept your smile nonetheless.

“Thank you… uh…” you trailed off, not knowing how to address him.

“The name’s Kuroo Tetsuro.”

“Mine is L/N Y/N!” you smiled politely. “Thank you, Kuroo.”

You were now very much awake and able to take in his appearance, an opportunity you missed during the earlier commotion. He wasn’t dressed in anything too outlandish; it was rather simple honestly — a white tee, a black jacket, some black joggers with a red stripe going down the side, and matching red shoes to accentuate the pop of colour. His jet black hair was spiked up as well, but strangely, not all of it. For some reason, he allowed his bangs to fall across the right side of his face instead of spiking it up like the rest. It was unusual, but strangely... rather charming.

“It’s not very polite to stare, you know.”

You blushed at his comment and whipped your head to look at anything else but him.

“I- I wasn’t staring!” you denied, hoping your face wasn’t as red as it felt.

“Sure you weren’t,” he smirked.

You rolled your eyes but couldn’t stop smiling. Who was this guy? You’d barely even met him, yet you felt so comfortable around him. It was like you were naturally drawn to him. Attracted, even. You shook your head and cleared your throat, pushing those thoughts to the back of your mind.

“So uh, how much did I miss?” you asked.

“We just finished up the rest of this chapter on chemical bonding,” he replied. You groaned, dreading how much you’d have to study tonight in order to catch up on what you missed during the lecture. There was no way this could get worse.

And of course, just as you thought that, a dark splotch on Kuroo’s jacket caught your eye and you mentally slapped yourself as your eyes widened in embarrassment.

“Please tell me that isn’t what I think it is…” you said as you buried your face in your hands.

Confused, Kuroo followed your line of sight until it landed on a wet spot on his jacket, just below the curve of his shoulder — the very one you were sleeping on. He made a face and you had never felt more embarrassed in your entire life.

“Oh my gosh, please let me make it up to you! I’ll buy you lunch!” you sputtered out. You had to repay him somehow, not just because you’d used him as a pillow during Chemistry class but because there was now a huge spot of your drool on his clothes to show for it.

He chuckled at your flusteredness. “Lunch sounds great.”

He suggested going to his favourite food place, claiming it had the best grilled salted mackerel pike in the world. You agreed and followed him — it was only fair he chose where to eat after everything you’d put him through. As you neared the stall, you caught a whiff of the delicious grilled fish, causing your mouth to water and you licked your lips excitedly. The waitress greeted you at the entrance and motioned you to follow her inside as she led you to your seats.

“A table for two for the lovely couple,” she gestured towards the table. “Enjoy your date!” she smiled.

Your cheeks started to heat up and you shook your head vigorously at the misunderstanding. “N-no! This isn’t-” you tried to correct her but your protests fell on deaf ears as she was already walking away.

“Wow, do you not want to go on a date? You wound me,” he placed his hand over his heart in mock hurt.

“NO NO NO IT’S JUST-”

“Oh, so you do want to go on a date with me?”

“WHA- NO- I MEAN-”

“I’m teasing, kid,” he laughed and ruffled your hair. “Sit down.”

You let out a sigh as you both took your seats. You were a complete mess today. He didn’t seem to mind though. In fact, he seemed to find it pretty amusing.

You peered over your menu to look at the boy sitting across you. It was hard to believe you’d only met a while ago considering you were now having lunch at his favourite food place, talking like you were old friends. And you couldn’t help but feel something warm starting to bubble within your chest.

“Staring again?” he asked without even needing to look at you. You quickly snapped out of your thoughts.

“NO!” you retorted and lifted the menu up to cover your red face.

The two of you placed your orders and the rest of lunch went without a hitch. You were surprised with how easily conversation came with Kuroo and how naturally you guys got along together.

“So, grilled salted mackerel pike huh?” you asked.

“Yeah, this place is famous for it. It’s my favourite food,” he replied in between mouthfuls. “Docosahexaenoic acid is good for the brain, you know.”

“Wow, didn’t know you were such a nerd.”

“Better than someone who sleeps in class and drools on people.”

“HEY!”

Everything was just so easy with him, and your mind kept drifting back to the waitress’s words. Was this really a date? And more importantly, did you want it to be a date? You’d only just gotten to know him a few hours ago but the chemistry between you was undeniable. The warm feeling in your chest returned and honestly, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t want to hold on to it a little longer. But lunch was coming to an end and you knew you’d have to let go.

“That was a great meal,” Kuroo said, satisfaction written all over his face. Thanks for the ‘date’ kid,” Kuroo chuckled at the term the waitress used. Your heart skipped a beat and you willed yourself not to blush again or give anything away.

“You’re welcome, old man,” you smiled innocently at the term you used. He’d kept calling you ‘kid’ so it was only fair that you returned the favour. You’d never admit it but you secretly liked it that he gave you a nickname. He smiled at you and shook his head at your silly antics.

Both of you stood outside the shop, not really knowing what else to say. You knew it was time to part ways since you’d already given him what you owed, but neither of you wanted to say goodbye.

“Well, I guess I’d better get back home… I’ve got to catch up on what I missed out during the lecture anyway,” you laughed nervously, trying to break the silence.

“Yeah, I guess this was a good bonding session, huh,” he grinned lopsidedly, but you could tell it didn’t quite reach his eyes. Even so, you laughed at his dorkiness. You were going to miss it.

“Well, I’ll get going then,” you said, turning to leave. “Oh and uh, sorry about your jacket,” you smiled sheepishly.

Kuroo perked up in sudden realisation. “Oh wait! Speaking of…” he closed the distance between you, rummaging through his bag and fishing out the black jacket he’d previously taken off. “Here,” he said, shoving it into your arms.

You looked at him and raised an eyebrow. “What’s this? A keepsake?” you snickered.

“Pfft, you wish,” he smirked. “It has your saliva on it. You wash it,” he said.

You cringed at the truth in his words and folded it over your arms. “Alright, I’ll wash it and give it back to you tomorrow.”

He grinned devilishly with a mischievous glint in his eye, and suddenly you understood his true intentions. You couldn’t help but smile like an idiot.

“Good. Now I’ve got an excuse to see you again tomorrow.”

Damn this clever nerd.

He’s good.

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dreamsmp-au-ideas · 4 years

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L'Manberg Falls anon that suggested the Oracle name. You know what. I'll start marking myself with the 🔱 emoji so you know who to blame for angst lmao.

How does the gang get Dream out of Tubbo's body? And I'm guessing Tubbo isn't gonna have a pretty good time when he returns to his body. The guy must be exhausted phisically after so many allnighters to find out the password AND a possession on top of that. Probably first convo he has with the Mystery Hacks is at the hospital, if Schlatt gets him there.

I imagine everyone is spooked at just the wounds of the strings man. How did that even happen?

I’m assuming that they get Dream out of Tubbo’s body the same way it was in canon, Tubbo’s body has not rested for a long time and I’m pretty sure Dream didn’t go and refuel with food at some point while possessing. So some running around and a punch got Dream out of Tubbo’s body.

Tubbo isn’t looking so good after returning to his body. He feels like shit, his body is tired, and his wrists and ankles hurt like hell. Tommy and him get a conversation in about this and Tubbo at first just brushes it off while Tommy is rightfully worried.

Schlatt was going to drive everyone home and stuff and then like halfway when they were walking to the car Tubbo just straight up begins to black out. This caused panic for everyone and when he passed out, Schlatt drove him to the hospital and all the gang is just panicking.

During the car ride there someone just spots the strings tied around his wrists and it is just spooked about them. They’re tied on tight and looks like they are about to draw blood or something. They go and tell the others about this and Schlatt is just breaking several laws of driving as he listens to this.

Tubbo wakes up in the hospital and just sees everyone in the room and they are just filled with relief when Tubbo is awake. Eventually after some coercing and convincing from Tommy, Tubbo decides to tell everyone about his possession.

Now mind you, Techno and Schlatt have no idea who is Dream at this point. Schlatt had sneaking knowings of it but only in passing. So you get to see Techno look up and just knowing what happened and Schlatt just having increasing horror as his employees and nephew tell him about this Dream guy.

At the end of it all, he’s just in shock and worry for the kid. Holy hell, his nephew just made a deal with a god damn demon. And then that demon went and abused his body to the point where they had to take him to the hospital.

Needless to say, they have a lot to talk about once Tubbo gets out of the hospital. About the laptop, about Dream, about the literal fact that Tubbo has several injuries that may last and the scars from just the strings being tied up on his wrist and ankles.

#l'manberg falls au #tubbo #tommyinnit #jschlatt #ask #trident anon #long post #ask to tag

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rocknrollarticles · 4 years

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The Artwoods Story

The Artwoods’ 100 Oxford Street is a UK compilation album released in 1983 that features a four-page booklet (pictured above) that tells the band’s story, written by guitarist Derek Griffiths.

Since there's a limit on the number of photos that can be added to one post, I'll be reblogging this a couple times until I have all the info up. To see this post with all the info added in reblogs, click here.

Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoy Derek’s words as much as I do!

Transcript under the cut (main text + Record Mirror article from page three's rightmost side)

“ It's difficult to pinpoint exactly when the Artwoods came into being because everything just seemed to evolve naturally. The one date however that does stick in my mind is the 1st October 1964 which is the date I turned professional, thus depriving the accountancy profession of a valuable addition to its ranks! But seriously, one must go back to previous events in order to trace the history of the group.

I first met Jon Lord at a party in West Hampstead when he was a drama student at The Central School of Speech & Drama. He was introduced to me by Don Wilson whose claim to fame was his membership of the famous skiffle group Dickie Bishop & His Sidekicks. They had had a hit years previously with "No Other Baby But You", and Don now ran a band on a semi-pro basis called Red Bludd's Bluesicians in which I played guitar. Well, I say we were called this, but only when we were fortunate enough to cop an R&B gig. We used to play The Flamingo Allnighter and lots of U.S. air bases. The rest of the time we played weddings and tennis club dances as The Don Wilson Quartet! Jon Lord was brought in on piano and was a very valuable addition especially as he could get his hands around a little jazz and all the old standards. Jon used to ring me at work and interrupt my vouching of sales ledger invoices in order to discuss the coming weekends gigs. We would bubble with excitement at the approach of an R&B gig as we really hated all the weddings and barmitzvahs.

Around this time Don made a very important policy decision and we suddenly became the proud owners of a Lowrey Holiday organ for Jon to play. Shortly after this Don contrived to drive the band-wagon into the back of a lorry on the North Circular, doing himself considerable mischief in the process. This brought about the unfortunate end of Don's career with us, but not before he had masterminded an important merger of two local bands.

For some time we had been aware, and not a little envious, of The Art Wood Combo led by none other than Art Wood himself. His band underwent a split at that time and Red Bludd's Bluesicians, alias The Don Wilson Quartet, were neatly grafted on. We really felt we were moving into the big league by doing this as Art not only had more work than us but, wait for it, used to sing with Alexis Korner's Blues Incorporated with Charlie Watts on drums and Cyril Davies on harmonica! The next problem was a replacement for Don, and this was solved by stealing the bass player from another local group The Roadrunners, a good looking cove who went by the name of Malcolm Pool. The offer and acceptance of the gig were transacted in a pub car park somewhere in West Drayton staring into the murky waters of the Grand Union Canal clutching pints of local bitter (Fullers?). (Authors note: drugs had not been invented at this stage, as far as most groups were concerned, apart from the odd pill to keep one awake on an all nighter!)

The next personnel change took place some time in 1964 and this involved the retirement of drummer Reg Dunnage, who did not want to turn pro. Auditions were held in London and lots of drummers attended. However it was more or less a foregone conclusion that Keef Hartley would get the job. You see we'd already decided that what The Artwoods needed above all else was a Liverpool drummer! Unfortunately none came to the audition, but Keef hailed from Preston which was near enough for us. Keef had previously played with Rory Storm & The Hurricanes, replacing Ringo Starr in the process (heady stuff this), and Freddy Starr & The Midnighters. Both were such influential bands of their time that these credentials combined with Keef's quasi Liverpool accent (at least to our ears) provided him with a faultless pedigree.

So that was it, the line-up that would take us through to 1967 when Colin Martin eventually replaced Keef Hartley on drums.

For a while we worked as The Art Wood Combo but then decided it was hipper to drop the Combo and become The Artwoods.

The period when The Artwoods were operating was one of musical change when groups went from recording and performing other writers' material to writing their own. In fact the last year of the group's existence was 1967 which heralded the arrival of "Hendrix", "Flower-Power". "Festivals" and experimental use of mind expanding drugs! 1966/67 were particularly exciting years to be based in London and every night would be spent in one of the many clubs which had recently sprung up. The Ad Lib, The Scotch of St. James, The Cromwellian, Blaises and of course The Speakeasy to mention a few. Many of these we played in and the trick was to be well known enough not to have to pay the entrance fee on nights off. Any night you could be sure to meet your mates "down The Speak" and it became the unofficial market place for rock musicians.

It was also the days before huge amounts of equipment took over. Equipment meant road-crew and trucks and in turn financial hardship. This simple equation has been the downfall of many bands over the years. We used to travel in a 15 cwt van together with all the gear-no roadies, just us. It's amusing to recall but after recording the TV show "Ready, Steady, Go" (in Kingsway in those days?) one would be besieged by autograph hunters on the way to the van with the gear. Even really 'big groups of the day like The Zombies would hump their own equipment and apologetically place an amp on the ground in order to sign an autograph! Because it was financially viable to travel to small clubs in this way, we would often average 6 or 7 nights a week, every week, on the road. A bad month would probably mean less than twenty gigs. This meant we were living, sleeping and eating in close, and I mean close, proximity. You really found out who your friends were.

The subject of equipment is an interesting one as it really distinguishes the bands then from those of today. The average pub band of today would carry more equipment than we did. As I've already mentioned we were quick to realise that we could elevate ourselves musically by investing in a proper electric organ as opposed to a Vox Continental or Farfisa that many groups used. Consequently the group purchased a Lowrey Holiday and we thought this alone would provide us with the Booker T and Jimmy Smith sound.

What we failed to realize was that we also needed a Leslie cabinet with a special built-in rotor to get that "wobbly" sound. Our friend and mentor Graham Bond, the legendary organist/saxophonist, was quick to point out the error of our ways one night when we were gigging at Klooks Kleek in West Hampstead. We groaned inwardly when we discovered the extra cost and humping involved, but it had to be bought. We were fortunate very early on to score a deal with Selmers, who provided us with free amps and P.A., but we had to make the trek to Theobalds Road once a week to get it all serviced as they were not as reliable in those days. I used a Selmer Zodiac 50 watt amp and Malcolm had Goliath bass cabinets with a stereo amp.

The P.A. comprised two 4 x 12 cabinets and a 100 watt amp! When we toured Poland we played in vast auditoria and linked our system with the Vox system being used on tour by Billy J Kramer & The Dakotas. This meant we were pumping out no more than 300 watts which is laughable by today's standards. Although it would never have compared in quality, I can remember standing at the back of extremely large halls and being able to hear clearly all the words Billy J sang. One day in 1963 Alexis Korner sent me off foraging in and around Charing Cross Road for a new guitar, with instructions to mention his name whereupon I would receive a discount of 10%. Previously I played a Burns Trisonic (collectors will appreciate this model did not have "Wild Dog" treble) but fancied owning a Gibson ES335 as favoured by many blues players. Sure enough one was hanging invitingly in the window of Lew Davis's shop.

I ended up paying £135 and still use it regularly today although its value has multiplied five fold. Malcolm came with me that day and bought an Epiphone bass, the same colour and shape as my guitar. For years we looked like matching book-ends on either end of the group! Keef started off using a Rodgers drum kit, but somewhere along the line changed to, I think, Ludwig. There was no out-front mixing as is common today, just the P.A. amp on stage with the vocalist. Primitive I know, but everything revolved around bands being able to travel economically with their gear and perform at small clubs anywhere in Britain. The college circuit was much sought after and provided the icing on the cake while package tours were not necessarily well paid. We did our first with P. J. Proby and got £25 per night (for the lot of us) and we had to pay for our own accommodation!

I have already mentioned "Ready, Steady, Go" a show on which we appeared on more than one occasion. The original format called for groups to mime to their records but after a time it was decided that it would become "live" and that the show would be re-titled "Ready Steady Goes Live". We were proud to be picked for the first "live" show and learnt the news via a telephone call to our agent in London from a phone box high in the Pennines. We managed a drunken war-dance of celebration round the phone box believing that this meant we'd really cracked it. As I remember the first show we did featured Tom Jones (complete with lucky rabbits foot) miming to "It's Not Unusual", The Kinks, Donovan and Adam Faith's Roulettes playing live (without Adam). We were promoting our first single "Sweet Mary" and I would put the date at around late 1964.

Our first recording deal was with a subsidiary of Southern Music Publishing called Iver Productions and I reckon that would have been mid 1964. Southern had a four track studio in the basement of their offices in Denmark Street ("The Street") and getting the gear downstairs, especially the organ, was "murder". Our first producer was Terry Kennedy and we recorded several tracks with him. Without going too deeply into all the details of recording techniques of the period, one tended to compensate for the lack of tracking facilities available, by attempting to duplicate the live excitement. In many ways it was a frustrating experience particularly for ambitious guitar-players. I was a Steve Cropper freak and I knew as a musician that a lot of his sound on record resulted from him working his amplifier hard in the studio— thus the speaker would emit the sound he was used to on stage. In Britain however, engineers would say "You don't need to play loud man, we can turn you up on the desk". The result was a weedy, thin guitar sound. From way back I'd been experimenting with "feed back" on stage and I really had to dig my heels in about the guitar sound in the studio. Once when I turned my amp up to give it a bit of "wellie" on a solo the engineer bounded out of the control room screaming that the level would bust his microphones!

Sometime during the career of The Artwoods it was decided that we should graduate to a better studio. This was arranged by Mike Vernon who also became our producer. Our records had all been released through the Decca Record Co. and Mike was a staff producer with them. Mike w also an authority on "The Blues" and the relationship led to our only single chart record "I Take What I Want" a cover of a Sam & Dave U.S. R&B hit. Mike was also producing John Mayall at the time and it seemed only natural that Mike and The Artwoods should team up. From this point on we recorded at the Decca studio in Broadhurst Gardens, West Hampstead, but I can't honestly say it did any more for us than our previous efforts in the Southern Music basement, although we could now indulge ourselves in the comparative luxury of the eight track studio. Later on, towards the end of the groups life we were signed by Jack Baverstock at Philips Records who was looking for a group to cash in on the thirties-style gangster craze which had been triggered off by the film "Bonnie & Clyde". As a result we changed our name to "St. Valentines Day Massacre" and released a single of the old Bing Crosby hit "Brother Can You Spare A Dime?" It was an ill- fated venture, which I would prefer not to dwell on, virtually signalling the end of the band apart from a few heavy-hearted gigs with a changed line-up.

Before that though, there were many great times to remember, and a fair number of gigs that were memorable in one way or another.

One of our favourite gigs was Eel Pie Island which we regularly played once a month; in fact we held the attendance record there for a while until the ageing blues artist Jesse Fuller took it from us. Eel Pie Island is literally an island in the middle of the River Thames at Twickenham and there's never been a gig like it since. It was an Edwardian ballroom originally I believe, that achieved notoriety in the 50's with the Trad Jazz boom. At that time, an overloaded chain ferry was used to convey the crowd across the river, but during the 60's a small bridge was in existence although it was only wide enough to take the promoter Art Chisnall's mini van. He had to make three separate trips across with the gear strapped to the roof and hanging out the back doors.

The audiences were exceptional for those times and I don't know where they all came from... very much like art students and very much more like the 70's than 60's. Long hair predominated and this was before 'hippies' had officially been invented! If you can imagine a ramshackle wooden ballroom, bursting at the seams, condensation pouring from the walls, the audience on each others shoulders leaping up and down, the sprung dance floor bending alarmingly in the middle, in the summer couples strolling outside and lounging on the river bank ... all this and not a disc jockey in sight! One other bonus was that it was a “free” house and therefore sold many different types of beer— we always favoured Newcastle Brown. Back on the 'mainland' afterwards it was always riotous packing the gear into the truck. I don't know how he managed it but one night Malcolm drove our truck over the support band's guitar which happened to be lying about, thus breaking the neck. I'll never forget the shocked look on that poor guitarist's face as Malcolm smoothly slipped the van into gear, apologised and drove off in that order!

No trip up north was complete without stopping at the famed Blue Boar on the M1 for a "grease-up" on the way home. I do not refer to truck lubrication but to a particular rock'n'roll delicacy known as “full-house”. This comprised double egg, sausage, chips, beans, tomatoes, fried slice, tea, and (if you were man enough) toast. It was considered a Herculean task to break successfully the 10 bob' (50p) barrier-all served on wobbly cardboard plates that doubled as items to sign autographs on for the self service waitresses.

Waitress: What band are you?

Me: You won't have heard of us.

Waitress: Oh go on, tell us.

Me: OK. The Artwoods.

Waitress: Never 'eard of you!

It was everybody’s dream to walk into the Blue Boar just as their hit of the moment was playing on the Juke Box.

One time we were chosen to represent the twentieth century at the centenary celebrations of the State of Monte Carlo— a most lavish affair which the aristocracy and dignatories of Europe attended. Princess Grace and Prince Ranier were the hosts and people like Gina Lollobrigida and the like were there. The ball was held in the famous Casino at Monte Carlo and we stayed in an opulent hotel called The Hermitage, I think. All I can remember is that we all had single rooms (a rare luxury) which were massive, and you could have pitched a tent under one of the bath towels, they were so big. After this we jetted off up to Paris where we played next door to the Moulin Rouge at a club called The Locomotive.

Whilst we were there we were taken out by our friend Mae Mercer, the American lady blues singer who we backed in England. She lived in Paris and took us out to Memphis Slim's club where we all set about drinking like it was going out of style. At the end there was an embarrassing scene concerning the bill with the result that Mae ended up in tears. Whilst we were bumbling about in an alcoholic stupor, an upright looking gentleman put his arm round Mae to comfort her and a wallet appeared magically from his inside pocket. Without further ado the bill was despatched and we later learned that our anonymous benefactor was none other than Peter O'Toole who was busy in the street outside filming 'Night Of The Generals' and was an old buddy of Mae's.

One Boxing Day we loaded up with turkey sandwiches and Xmas pudding and headed off for a gig down in Devon or Cornwall somewhere. We arrived to find the club closed and boarded up, and as usual we were broke. Naturally we were livid, checked into an hotel and located the promoter who lived with his mum. Next morning we drove round to where he lived and burst our way past his confused mum. We found him in his bedroom nervously cowering against some fruit machines which he collected. He had no money so we forced him to empty his damned machines with the result that we drove back to London with 50 quids' worth of 'tanners' (approx 22p for the younger reader!)

Whilst on the subject of disasters I suppose I am duty bound to mention Denmark. The first time we went there we caught the ferry to the continent, drove up through Germany, then caught another ferry to Denmark. There was no promoter to meet us when we arrived so all we could do was drive to Copenhagen and check in at the Grand Hotel. It cost us an arm and a leg but at least we got a good nights sleep after being awake for nearly two days travelling. The next day we made a few phone calls and finally tracked down the promoter. He said: "Didn't you get my telegram cancelling the tour?" We politely said no we hadn't and what did he intend doing with us? He checked us into another hotel (cheaper of course) and set about booking us at places that were similar to English coffee bars and youth clubs. We made enough to survive on and paved the way to more successful tours of that country. In fact by now we had Colin Martin on drums and were pursuing a much more adventurous musical policy and writing our own material. It was just right for Denmark who had taken Hendrix to their hearts to name but one, and we subsequently became quite big there in 1967.

The Artwoods achieved modest success-a minor hit single in "I Take What I Want", but we worked constantly, travelled abroad, had fantastic fun and made a living doing so. We had seven single releases, one album, and one EP, and we broadcast both on radio and TV many times. We did stage tours such as the P. J. Proby tour and covered most aspects of "show-biz" apart from actually making a movie. It was the era when bands still had to prove themselves as a live act before being offered a recording contract. now frequently happens of course that an act can become huge record sellers without so much as venturing to do a live gig.

So what happened to everyone? Well Art returned to his former occupation as a commercial artist and finds some time to fit in free-lance work between accompanying brother Ron Wood on raving excursions between Rolling Stones gigs. Malcolm moved into the same field as Art and they now work in the same building. Both of them gig occasionally on a semi-pro basis although Malcolm spent some time playing with Jon Hiseman's Colosseum and Don Partridge in the early 70's. Jon Lord became famous with Deep Purple and Whitesnake as did Keef Hartley with John Mayall and various bands of his own. Colin Martin is now a BBC Radio producer of repute. I played in various bands such as Lucas and The Mike Cotton Sound, Colin Blunstone's band, Dog Soldier (with Keef again), before I somehow drifted into studio and theatre work. Recently I formed an R'n'B band called the G.B. Blues Company, and it's great to be back on the road again. ”

Derek Griffiths.

Clipping from Record Mirror on June 5, 1965, by Norman Jopling.

“We aim to excite!” … say the Art Woods

Just for the record, the Art Woods aren't a part of Epping Forest. In fact they're a group of five interesting young men, named after the group's leader Art Wood. They also happen to be one of the most realistic groups on the scene.

For a start, they are the awkward position of having a large following, a club residency but no hit record. Secondly. they don't mind pandering to commercial tastes, even though they have been hailed as one of the most authentic R & B groups in the land.

NO PULL

“But authentic R&B just isn't pulling the crowds any more,” says Art. “The audiences want to be excited, not to be lectured on what is 'good' and what is 'bad'. Although there was a time when you could spend half an hour on one number with long solos by everybody, it didn't last long. And although there are some clubs like that still, most of them want something fresh and new.

“And we try to cater for them. We like authentic R&B, but we also like playing everything and anything else. So far, our two discs haven't meant a light. Of course we'd love a hit. But we're lucky enough to make a good living without one.”

DISCS

The Art Woods latest disc is "Oh My Love" and the one before that “Sweet Mary”. Of them Little Walter has said that he couldn't believe any white group could sing and play the blues like they do.

Line-up of the group is Art Wood, leader. vocalist and harmonica. Derek Griffiths, lead guitar, Jon Lord, organ and piano. Malcolm Pool— base guitar, and Keef Hartley on drums. The boys use a specially adapted Lowrie organ, and get a sound that's really different.

But even if the boys sometimes become depressed about no hits records, they should remember groups like Cliff Bennett, the Barron-Knights, the Rockin' Berries and the Yardbirds, and how long THEY waited before they had a hit!

N.J.

#the artwoods #the art woods #art wood #derek griffiths #malcolm pool #jon lord #keef hartley #colin martin #100 oxford street #the 100 club #articles #liner notes #newspaper clippings #record mirror #my posts

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flipnegg · 3 years

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Under the Lights [Modern AU/Fake Dating AU] 02

Pairing: Itachi x Kousuke [OC]

Words: 2,118

Warnings: None

“Do you have everything you need?” Itachi asked as he loaded the last bag Kousuke gave him into the trunk of his black SUV. He sounded so much like a mom that it made Kousuke want to laugh.

“Pretty sure,” Kousuke hummed tiredly, rubbing his eyes.

When Itachi came to pick Kousuke up at his dorm, it was so early that the sun hadn’t risen yet. That night, or should I say this morning, Kousuke stayed up late enough that he reasoned there was no need to fall asleep and that he would fall asleep in the car. The sight of Kousuke walking out of the dorm exit in his pajamas while carrying his packed bags and pillow was certainly a sight for Itachi to witness.

Itachi told him earlier that the car ride would be long, so he would pick him up in the early morning. He also mentioned that they would probably arrive at his parent’s house around dinner time. Hearing that Itachi would be driving all day concerned Kousuke, and when he offered to drive so Itachi could rest, he just smiled and said he was fine with it.

Soon enough the two of them get in the car, Kousuke grabbing his pillow, while Itachi begins to drive off.

After a few minutes, Kousuke’s soft, quiet snores filled the car. Itachi took his eyes off the road for a split second, taking a look at the white-haired boy that sat next to him. He couldn’t help the smile that crept onto his lips and was grateful that Kousuke agreed to help him. Eventually, Itachi turned on the radio while driving down an empty highway. He listened to the music softly, careful not to wake his passenger up.

...

Kousuke stirred when he felt the car slow to a stop. Opening his eyes, he saw the sun was up and then his stomach grumbled, indicating it had to be around lunchtime. He let out a pitiful groan as he stretched, causing Itachi to let out a small snort before getting out of the parked car.

Getting out as well, Kousuke saw that they were at a rest stop of sorts after looking around. They had some fast food restaurants, travel aids to help with directions, and bathrooms. Speaking of bathrooms, Kousuke had to use the bathroom badly. That woke him up immediately.

Before closing the car door, Kousuke grabbed a duffle bag that contained a nice change of clothes to replace his baggy pajamas. He flashed Itachi a grin when he gave him a questioning look at the bag.

“Gotta look nice for your folks,” Kousuke laughed. “Unless you want me to show up like this.” He gestured to his ungraceful appearance.

“It’s probably for the best,” mused Itachi. He was sure his father would throw a fit seeing them like that. He quickly locked the car before the two of them headed off to the entrance.

Kousuke looked around as the two of them walked inside. The rest stop was clean and simple. It had a few scattered families that were travelling for the holidays, some walking their dogs or hurrying to get their kids to the bathrooms, where Itachi and Kousuke were headed towards. They relieve themselves quickly, and Itachi let’s Kousuke know that he was going to pick up some food while Kousuke changes.

After Itachi left to get the food, Kousuke quickly changed into his other set of clothes. He put on a nice pair of tan khakis and a dark blue sweater then changed from his slippers, yes slippers, to his black converse. The final touch was his jean jacket to protect him from the chilly, winter breeze outside.

Once Kousuke stepped out of the bathroom stall after changing, he took in his appearance in the mirror. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to laugh or cry because of how messy his hair was. White strands were sticking up in multiple directions except for the right side of his head. The side that had been pressed against his pillow for the whole car ride had been sticking up and matted against the side of his head.

Quickly, he turned on the sink, running his now wet hands through his hair. He prayed that gravity would take mercy on him. At the end of his efforts, his hair was wet but stayed down and lay flatter than normal.

Looking around the bathroom, he made sure no one was looking before he began to use one of the hand dryers to dry his hair as quickly as possible. He looked ridiculous with his head shoved beneath the loud air blower, but Kousuke didn’t think twice about it. He already looked crazy enough walking into the rest stop with his pjs and baggy clothes, hair sticking up in ways that defied the laws of physics. This was a piece of cake.

At least, that’s what he thought before Itachi walked into the bathroom and made direct eye contact with him while his head was underneath the hand dryer. Kousuke jumped, gracefully banging the back of his head against the bottom of the drying machine. The loud bang echoed throughout the, thankfully empty, bathroom, taunting Kousuke for his horrible decisions.

“I got the food.” Itachi said holding up the bag, not commenting on whatever he walked in on Kousuke doing.

Kousuke thanked the gods above for not shaming him any further, but that didn’t stop his face from burning red. He gingerly rubbed the forming bump on the back of his head. Grabbing his duffle bag full of his dirty clothes and slippers from where he left them on the sink, he walked past Itachi, too embarrassed to say anything.

“Your hair looks better,” Itachi said once he started following him out of the rest stop, the bag of food in hand. From position, he could see the tips of Kousuke’s ears turn a bright red, but didn’t point it out and kept walking towards the car.

What Kousuke didn’t know was that Itachi thought he looked nice before and after changing. There was something domestic and endearing about seeing Kousuke in such a relaxed state around him. Throughout the past few years of university, the two of them had a few classes together and only talked here and there. Itachi only saw him in those professional environments, so it was a nice change of pace to see Kousuke walk out of his dorm in his pajamas.

A faint smile fell upon Itachi’s lips when he watched Kousuke fumble with the car door handle before finally opening the door.

He hoped his parents would like Kousuke because he sure did.

…

They drove for a few more hours, taking stops here and there to let Itachi walk around and stretch his legs. While driving, they played music, talked about their finals and Itachi’s family, eventually got dinner, and when things fell silent, Kousuke dozed off. The lull of the car helped him fall asleep quicker, getting the rest he needs because of all the allnighters he pulled in the past week due to finals.

The next time Kousuke woke up, the sun was setting. He figured that they were almost to their destination and felt the butterflies in his stomach flutter once again. Fake dating or not, Kousuke was meeting Itachi’s family and that was a nerve wracking thought. He was positive that he’ll mess up at least once. With Kousuke’s luck, he’ll probably mess up his own name or worse, Itachi’s parent’s names. Oh no. What if he did mess up their names?

As if sensing his distress, Itachi gave him a quick pat on the knee to catch his attention. He gave him a small smile before returning his eyes to the road ahead of them.

“You’ll do fine.” Itachi tried to reassure him, and Kousuke felt a little better. His shoulders felt less tense. “Even if you do mess up it just shows you’re human, and there’s nothing wrong with that.” And the weight is back on his shoulders.

The displeased look on Kousuke’s face made Itachi laugh. “Thanks, I feel loads better.” The sarcasm practically dripped off of his words. The white-haired boy turned to look out the window, pouting, which resulted in another laugh from Itachi.

“Hey, my pain isn’t for your entertainment,” Kousuke muttered through his pout, but he couldn’t help the twitch of his lips.

Soon enough, Itachi took an exit off the highway, stating that they were almost there to his parents house. Kousuke fiddled with his hands, a habit of his, soon feeling them become damp with his nervous sweat. Itachi paid no mind with Kousuke’s nervous antics, letting him be as he made the familiar turn into his neighborhood.

As they drove through Itachi’s neighborhood, Kousuke couldn’t help but gawk at how gorgeous the houses were. Some were decorated with simple Christmas lights, while others had a classic look to them, perfectly lit with spotlights and wreaths hung on doors and windows. He was pretty sure Itachi’s family was rich. They had to be to live in a neighborhood this nice.

Itachi let out a soft sigh once he pulled up to his parent’s house, feeling relaxed as ever. Although, he couldn’t say the same for his passenger. Turning off the ignition to his care, Itachi looked over at his companion. The Uchiha took in the stiff posture of Kousuke and slowly grew concerned.

“You sure you’re up for this?” Itachi asked, pulling Kousuke out of his thoughts. It’s not like he could back out anyways. They were already there and his parents were expecting them to knock on the front door any minute now.

Kousuke nodded before looking at Itachi in the eyes. With a shaky exhale he spoke. “Yeah.. um yeah. Let’s go.”

It’ll be fine, Kousuke thought to himself. Itachi and you went over this before. You know his family. This is no sweat.

Itachi unlocked the car door before they both stepped out into the chilly night air. “I’ll introduce you to my family first and we can unpack everything after.”

The two walked up the Uchiha’s driveway and that’s when Kousuke got a good look at his companions house. It was large with a nice yard and clean landscaping. If Kousuke looked closer, he probably wouldn’t be able to see a single blade of grass out of place. They had some decorations for the holiday on their front porch and a classic wreath on the front door. He wished he grew up in a house like this.

Once they both made it to the front door, Itachi grabbed his hand. Kousuke’s brain stuttered for a second. Fake dating. Gotta act like a couple. Kousuke thought back to their conversation earlier in the day during their drive.

“I don’t want you to be uncomfortable, so we can stick to simple things like holding hands and hugs,” Itachi responded when Kousuke asked about what was expected of him for this fake dating ploy to work out. “I won’t make you kiss me or anything beyond that, so don’t worry. I’m prioritizing your comfort over anything else.”

Kousuke was relieved. Holding hands was probably the best he could do. He just hoped Itachi would look over the fact that Kousuke gets nervous sweats in the palms of his hands. In the past, he’s heard that it’s pretty gross from girls he’s “dated.” So you can add that to the long list of insecurities Kousuke has.

“If my parents ask about the lack of affection or skinship, I’ll say that we prefer to keep it private.” Itachi really thought this through.

Kousuke hummed softly. “Do we have nicknames for each other? You can call me anything except for Babe or Bae.” Kousuke said before pointing a finger at Itachi, suddenly turning serious. “If you do, I will jump out of this moving car right now.”

Itachi let out a laugh. “I’ll just call you Kou, and you can call me what ever you want. I’m not really one for nicknames and all that, so I’ll probably use it sparingly.”

Kousuke felt a little better knowing that Itachi wasn’t expecting much. At least things wouldn’t change too much. Just two friends who hold hands. He could do it.

Kousuke gripped Itachi’s hand tighter before Itachi knocked on the front door. He tried to focus more on the man’s soft hands instead. They were warm which contrasted the biting cold from the winter air. His nerves were still getting the best of him, but the black haired man gave Kousuke a small, reassuring smile, telling him that it’ll be okay.

That’s right. Kousuke told himself. It’ll be okay.

#fake dating au #itachi x oc #naruto oc #modern au #modern au itachi

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phoenix-knight · 2 years

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Session 1

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: so, how are ya doin?

Me: running on fast depleting reserves of energy because I have no idea how others do it and why the fuck does this have to be so difficult?

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: when was the last time you took a breather?

Me: I don't fuckin know, I don't remember...ok I see what you're implying but there is no way law school will be less cruel to me

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: I notice you have the eyes of imminent burnout and forceful productivity

Me: I see you're talking about irrelevant things

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: why?

Me: ok lookie here thought technician, I worked my ass off for a classical dance performance on the 74th Republic day of India, while totally wrecking my body cause my glutes ached for days with all the half-sitting/squatting positions and brutal practice... I got barely 5 days of rest most of which I spent worrying about how the fuck I was gonna complete all the research papers I have been assigned. now our dance contingent is participating in a fest and obviously, I couldn't not go there because its an opportunity for a professional competition, and the dancer in me is hungry for some fucking recognition even if my brain engine is running on sleep deprivation and SSRI meds. I still just had to fucking go cause that's what members do for their team. with all the dance practices till 5 PM, I reach home one and half hour later at 6:30 PM, taking into account the time I take to freshen up in the space of an hour, I have no space to breathe. I am already freaking out about the amount of research I have to get done and the 1500 word essays I have to write. here i am ranting on tumblr about said pressure and stress of managing a hundred things simultaneously, instead of completing what I can. I have gone as far as to bring my laptop to class and read research papers in class while trying to blink my eyes into submission after staring at the screen for too fucking long...*panting*

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: (...)

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: (.......)

Me: *still panting*

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: wow, that's a......

Me: I know what you're gonna say, don't say it, don't you fucking say-

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: ...a lot.

Me: FUCKKKKKK I KNOOOOOOOOOW *lets out a bloodcurdling scream*

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: *looks visibly petrified*

Me: *sighs* that felt better, now that you're on the same page, what the fuck do I do.

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist:(awkwardly) do what you can...?

Me: no shit, doc.

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: *clears throat* look, i know it seems like a shitty thing to say, but really, you ARE doing the best you fucking can with the energy and will you currently have. you have a lot on your plate and that is clearly exhausting, it is totally understandable that at the end of the day you are physically and mentally exhausted. it makes sense that you have little to no energy left to cater to the projects that were assigned to you. you cannot run on empty smoke, human bodies get tired, need alone time, to recharge and replenish energy reserves. human bodies need rest to do better at whatever they can't seem to do after pulling an allnighter. even though juggling things simultaneously is fucking hard, i know you're still standing. you are surviving and moving forward, slowly and surely. take a breath, reprioritize, and focus on doing what you think is possible right now, not on perfecting everything you do. you may not be able to achieve the quality you envisioned, but that quality of research comes from at least weeks of research and enough time to comb through them. you have neither the time nor the energy reserve to do that right now. you have to execute what is currently feasible, not what is clearly unrealistic, such expecting to be able to contribute 100% to dance for 3+ hours, attending classes for half the say, travel, study and writing assignments within the four hours available to you before you pass out on your bed.

Me: (...)

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: (...)

Me: I see.

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: what?

Me: what?

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: what do you see?

Me: i see what you're saying, doc.

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: how do you feel right now?

Me: like its OK to put down the burden of perfectionism and execute what i can with the resources i currently have, because that is the best allocation of my energy right now.

Dr.Tumblr Mindfuckery, The Therapist: (...) that's deep, bruh.

Me: *rolls eyes and sighs* i fuckin know right. catch ya the next time i am pre-meltdown, doc. Ciao.

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muppenthings · 4 years

Note

Muppen! I said I was gonna come back and gush about your art,aand then I kinda passed out? Lol. School and stuff has got me pulling a solid 3 allnighters consecutively plus I had a solid hour, maybe of sleep on the 4th day. I blinked Friday evening and woke up at 11pm Saturday and the first thing I saw, after the mini panic of legit missing a day is Virgil getting slapped in the face by an Orca. Wild!🐙1/

Actually gushing tho, like you gave Orcas personality???like skills! I like the shade of blue their eyes are, just heh pretty. Also the bubbles that come up to the surface? Dude that detail like amazing and the light reflecting? Gorgeous. I can practically hear the seagulls??!! Also seeing how a sleeping Virgil looks from below is freaking hilarious. Just floppy and floaty. Does he ever drift like that? But like the boi finally gets some sleep only to be rudley awakened XD. Petty Martha tho.🐙2/

Oh no! I’m sorry school is pushing you that hard. I really, really hope you get some rest now. Take care of yourself! 💕

Of course I had to give them personalities! I gave them all different eye colors/markings. Like Wilbur’s got “eyebrows”. And thank you! :D He’s very floppy yes. He probably drifts a little, but he doesn’t sleep long enough at a time to drift far. xD Martha wanted some payback and she got it. But at what cost? xD

#Ask #Anonymous octopus #giant merman au #gma ask

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soysaucevictim · 4 years

Text

Week 3.

Jan. 16

I woke up around 1PM.

Did a bit of the usual and got some iced coffee, before today’s exercises.

First, today’s DD. 10 circle push-ups with EC. Very sloppy, but acceptable for my energy levels today.

Last. Chapter 13 of the AoP. I briefly thought about trying to go for Level 3 (7 sets, 20 reps per exercise per set), But by the time I got to the bounce + bounce + split jacks I went “noep, not today.“ So I did the remaining workout at Level 2 (5 sets, 10 reps per exercise per set).

That being said, I did a few extra rounds of half jacks to chase a bit of bliss from the bouncing and jumping jacks portions of this workout, afterwards.

I updated my logs, did some of the usual, and got some more writing done for the iZ!AU.

I went to bed obscenely late again.

Jan. 17

I woke up after 1PM today.

Did a bit of the usual before exercise.

First, today’s DD. 2′ sitting punches with EC. I counted 248 reps by the end of it. Definitely started to feel it in my abs after the first 1′ or so. Enjoyable exercise

Last. Chapter 14 of the AoP. Traveled again to start off - 15TP. Level 2 as high knees, in one go.

Did workout proper at Level 3 with max rest (5 sets, 2x12 push-ups per set). Push-ups got a bit sloppy but this was pretty manageable. Enjoyed the rest of it, though.

Spent a good chunk of the day on Movie Night, with the co-conspirator. We watched “Flubber” and “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory”.

I also got a bit of writing done, before turning in.

Went to bed in the red zone, but earlier than yesterday.

Jan. 18

I woke up after 11AM.

After some of the usual and some dishes, did my exercise.

First, today’s DD. 2′ elbow clicks with EC. I counted 140 reps completed by the end. Pretty breezy.

Last. Chapter 15 of the AoP. A “Jobs“ day. Did all three jobs in the chapter plus one extra from the Canis Board. Took more than an hour to get it all done and kicked my own ass in the process. Probably triggered some ETD again, probably overdid it a little bit.

I traveled a total of 119TP to get to the job locations and back. Level 2, as high knees. I frequently broke up the HKs into bursts/sets of 9-15TP increments. Definitely got harder to get through near the end. (Also broke it up by segments of distance between locations.)

The jobs I did, where they were, and how broke those up:

[Chapter] - Mines Job = 800 overhead punches (4x200)

[Chapter] - Bunker 7 Job = 500 knife hand strikes (100/100 + 100/100 + 50/50)

[Board - Canis] - Bunker 7 Job = 500 Squats (5x100)

[Chapter] - Camp Mira Job - 100 calf raises (2x50)

I probably should’ve expected that this was going to be pretty time and energy-consuming.

But I apparently had the inertia to make today’s Hello Fresh Meal. Shrimp Spaghetti with a kick. It was alright. Probably spent a bit too long preparing the shrimp in all of it. :P

And then I had the silly idea to make a databent mash-up “Forbidden Fruit“ with “The Rat“.

So I basically pulled an allnighter. Getting to bed at like 11AM...

Jan. 19

I woke up “proper“ after like 2PM.

Did a bit of the usual before today’s exercise.

First, today’s DD. 60 knee-to-elbow twists with EC. Fairly fun and breezy. Definitely felt it in my sore hamstrings from recent workouts.

Last. Chapter 16 of the AoP. First section is some traveling. 22TP, this time. Level 2, as high knees and done in one go. Quads also being a bit stiff/sore made this a bit of a challenge.

The meat of today’s workout involved fighting a guy named Boris. Just 5′ of non-stop jabs+crosses. I swapped stances at the 2′30″ mark. I counted 616 punches thrown, happy I managed a pretty consistent 2/sec pace. Enjoyable - regardless of sore arms. (Mountain Men Perk Get.) :,D

I spent much of the rest of my day on the usual stuff.

I went to bed in the red zone but far earlier than yesterday.

Jan. 20

I woke up after 1PM today.

I basically tanked my day reading an engrossing SaSi long fic. I don’t regret that, but it did wind up leading me to rain check all my exercise for the day. :,D

I had no business going to bed obscenely late, but that fic I was reading just filled me with restless excitement after I caught up with it.

Jan. 21

I woke up after 1PM again.

Spent a bit of time on the usual before doing some exercise.

First, yesterday’s DD. 40 side elbow plank rotations with EC (20/20). That was pretty intense, but doable.

Second, today’s DD. 2′ leg raise hold with EC (head up). Breathing. Always go back to the breathing for intense holds of any kind.Last minute or a half was when I really had to start digging in here.

Last. Chapter 17 of the AoP. First section involved more travelling, 31TP. Level 2, as High knees, split into 12+10+9.

I did the main work out at Level 3 (5 sets, 10 Push-ups + plank walk-outs per) max rest. I definitely just barely got through it by the skin of my teeth. My sore quads and hamstrings felt it a lot during the walk-outs (and the jump-ins). The dragon push-ups actually gives the limbs a bit more of an actual reprieve.

After Dinner and dishes, I spent most of my day on the usual and on TVT.

I went to bed a couple hours earlier than yesterday - but still in the red zone.

Jan. 22

I woke up after 2PM today.

After a bit of the usual and chatting, I did my exercise for the day.

First, today’s DD. 30″ push-up plank hold with EC. I tried to lock-in a bit better form and notice my pecs’ engagement more. Arms really got to feeling it near the end.

Last. Chapter 18 of the AoP. Today was a challenge (more structurally than my own sense of difficulty) - string together some given exercises in any order non-stop for 10′. I’m happy I was able to manage it handily, though i didn’t bother counting reps - this was the sequence II went with:

1′ jab+cross punches (30″ each side)

1′ uppercuts (30″ each side)

1′ hook punches (30″ each side)

1′ side kicks (30″ each side)

1′ bounces

1′ knee strikes (30″ each side)

1′ elbow strikes (30″ each side)

1′ front kicks (30″ each side)

1′ jab+cross punches (30″ each side)

1′ bounces

Did a few extra bounces and half jacks to chase some of that good feeling.

Got going on today’s Hello Fresh Meal after that. Middle Eastern chickpea bowls. I didn’t mind it, all-in-all. Dad liked the little tomatoes.

After some chatting, BSing on TVT, and doing dishes, I got really inspired/motivated to write for another horror SaSi AU I was gnawing on.

This did mean going to bed at the break of dawn. But screw it, I’m still excited for what I have going thus far.

#adventures with fitness #adventures with hello fresh

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confusedcuriousjungleambivert · 5 years

Note

“You should sleep.”

“I’m not human, therefore, I do not require sleep.”

"Hajime, you are every percent human, now please come to bed."

Samon sighed, his eyes squinted at the violent lamp light his boyfriend used to finish the paperwork. His inmates tried to escape again, which resulted in more work for Hajime. And Hajime couldn't just go to sleep knowing he had more work he would wake up to.

Or at least he used to. After Samon and him got together, Samon tried his best to make sure his boyfriend would rest accordingly to his needs. That became easier when they moved together, solicitating that with the pretext of 'easier access to both their buildings and the warden's office'. They couldn't exactly tell everyone that they were together, a lot of danger could come out of that and they weren't ready for that yet. Some guards, the one closest to them knew, and some others were talking about the possibility, but nothing more.

Samon liked sleeping, especially sleeping in and especially sleeping in with his boyfriend while still being fully rested. He could hardly sleep alone, he has always been a cuddler and needed something or someone with him. At first, when Hajime had to pull an allnighter, he would wake up in the middle of his sleep and walk to Hajime's desk, nesting himself in his lap and falling asleep again. After that happened a couple of times, Hajime asked him to just tell him to come to bed, he felt horrible knowing he was keeping his boyfriend worried.

Hajime scratched his forehead, obviously tired and on the verge of sleep himself. His eyelids felt heavy, but he said nothing. Both of them knew Samon was right.

Samon walked sleepily to him, wrapping his hand around his left wrist. "I'll help you finish whatever you have left in the morning, now come, please."

Hajime sighed and looked up at his sleepy boyfriend, his hair messy from the pillow. He didn't have much left now, maybe just one or two, maximum three more papers. He could finish them in the morning, with his eyes closed. Yet he was always stubborn to finish them before sleep.

Not this time though, he had to admit he was far out too out of it. "Yeah, okay, I'm coming. I'll finish the rest tomorrow."

After he got up from his chair, Samon tightly hugged him from behind, silently following him to the bathroom and waiting for him to get ready. He was more or less already asleep, his cheek pressed to the spine and just dragging his fit wherever Hajime was going.

When they reached the bed, Hajime unknotted the hands around his chest and let Samon curl up in bed while changing. Finally done, he got under the covers and enjoyed the warmth his boyfriend gave him as he crawled into his arms.

Hajime enjoyed simple moments like that.

"Goodnight." he kissed the top of Samon's head.

Samon reply was a gentle snore.

#Nanbaka #hajime x samon #samon gokuu #nanbaka samon #sugoroku hajime #nanbaka hajime

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spaceskam · 5 years

Text

inspired by a fic that i cannot find and therefore i feel I hallucinated. also apparently ballsy enough to post this when notifications are in hell

Summary: Different things that happen within the year after Max died.

warning: a lot of sad. happy ending though

ao3

Alex left Roswell two days after Max died.

“Please, please don’t leave,” Michael had begged him, “We need you. Maria and Liz–they need you. I need you.”

Alex had grabbed his cheeks and smiled all sad and beautiful. He’d kissed him and it felt like a goodbye. Michael didn’t try to stop the sob that cracked through his chest and left him aching.

“Is it because I kissed Maria? It wasn’t anything, I swear, I was just–”

“Michael,” Alex said softly, but stern. Michael whimpered at the sound of his name, rolling his forehead against Alex’s collarbone. “This is something I have to do to keep you and your family safe. I’m not angry at you.”

“I don’t want to be safe without you,” Michael whispered, crying harder and clutching tighter.

“You don’t mean that.”

“Alex,” Michael whined one last time, “I need you to stay with me. I can’t do this without you.”

“I’ll come home, I promise.”

“When?”

Alex didn’t give him an answer.

Isobel left Roswell one week after Max died.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Michael yelled, glaring with a level of anger he’d never been able to find for Isobel before.

“I need to get out of this hell hole, Michael!” she screamed back, face red with rage.

“Max is fucking dead! You’re just going to leave me to pick up the fucking pieces?! You’re not going to help?!” Michael followed her out to her car, still shouting at her regardless of what sort of scene they might’ve been causing. Fuck this. Absolutely fuck it.

“My husband was an abusive serial killer and my brother is dead! I need to get away from it!” she told him, slamming the door to the backseat.

“Are you gonna come back and help me?! Are you expecting me to just fucking fix shit?!”

“This isn’t about you, Michael!” she spat, shaking her head, “I’ll come back eventually, I need to get away from this!”

“When are you coming back then, huh?! When are you going to help?!”

“I don’t know!”

She drove off without saying goodbye.

Maria separated herself two weeks after Max died.

“Maria, forget about me and everything, Liz needs you right now.”

“And where was she when I needed her?”

Michael gulped and bowed his head. His hands were shaking, desperate to hold onto someone that he still could. Maria couldn’t run away from Roswell like the rest. He thought that meant he had a chance to try. Yet, even she was done.

“She’s sorry about that, we both are,” Michael insisted, “We’re sorry about everything.”

“You all lied to me about everything, Guerin, for decades,” she said. It wasn’t even bitchy, so he couldn’t even find the right words to defend himself. And, when he tried, she didn’t even let him get past opening his mouth. “Withholding the truth is the same as lying when it comes to this.”

“I know,” he sighed, slumping down further, “It’s just, Liz needs someone.”

“And she has you,” Maria said. When he got up the courage to look at her, he tried to look even more pathetic than he felt. He already felt pretty pathetic.

“You really gonna cut us off completely?”

Maria held her head up high.

“I have to do what’s right for me.”

She kept her word.

Kyle… tried.

“I can, uh, bring that heart monitor over when I get off, but I get off at five in the morning,” Kyle said, his voice muffled. There was something horrifically annoying about a man who worked 80 hours a week.

“Nah, it’s whatever,” Michael grumbled, shuffling the grocery bags from one hand to the other as he tried to make sure he had what he needed. He and Liz were pulling an allnighter in the cave again. “It’s not like we’re doing anything important or anything.”

“Hey, I’m trying,” Kyle argued. Which, he was. But trying was hearing from him maybe once a week. “Also, I’m flying out to search shit with Alex on my day off this weekend, I’ll let you know if we find anything.”

“You still talk to Alex?” Michael asked, feeling his heart ache all over again.

“Yeah, dude.”

“Cool, glad the resurrection of my brother is less important than anything else.”

“It wouldn’t be if he wasn’t such a jackass.”

Kyle kept in touch when he could. He helped when he could. It just wasn’t enough.

Liz showed up at the airstream at three AM two months after Max died.

“Mikey?”

Michael opened his eyes and looked up to the crying girl that had come to him in the middle of the night. It wasn’t too out of the ordinary for them to spend nights together, usually falling asleep in bunkers or labs after going 48 hours on nothing but energy drinks. They no longer had anyone to police them, leaving it to just be them two against the world.

Only, tonight was a little different.

Liz hadn’t cried since Max died. He wasn’t sure if it was denial or anger or what, but he’d liked that she was the only one who hadn’t fled. He didn’t like seeing her cry though, so he opened his arms and let her crawl up against him. It only made sense when she told him she was pregnant.

Michael considered breaking down then, considered screaming and cursing a God he didn’t believe in about why the hell they were being thrown another fucking curveball. Why, after everything, was this happening to them? He wanted to let himself break.

However, crying hadn’t made Alex stay. Anger hadn’t made Isobel come home. Guilt-tripping didn’t make Maria stick around. Being passive-aggressive didn’t make Kyle help. None of those would work now.

Instead, he chose to be strong. That seemed like the only option left. Nothing else worked and, at this point, they were all they had. So Michael didn’t cry. He held her close and stroked her hair and promised her that they would figure it out. They had this.

Michael held her as she cried and he held her when she slept. He held her when she profusely apologized for being so dramatic and he held her for a little while longer after that. They didn’t really budge for at least 24 hours. It was the most either of them had slept in months.

“Have you thought about what you want to do?” Michael asked her at some point the following night. It was so dark he couldn’t see her face, but he could feel her breathing against his shoulder.

“I’m weighing my options,” Liz admitted, her voice softer than it had ever been before. “On one hand, this is the actual worst time to have a baby. On the other hand, it… it’s Max’s. It’s what I have of Max. It feels wrong to terminate given the circumstances. And, and I know he’d be so, so angry when he woke up.”

“Yeah, he probably would be,” Micahel agreed. He tried to steer away from politics when it came to Max, but he could assume the way he felt about that.

“But then I remembered it’s my fucking body,” Liz said in a way that sounded a lot more Liz than she had since she came to him the night prior. He smiled.

“Also very true.”

“And then I’m left with the thought that I have no idea what the difference between a human embryo and an alien embryo looks like. What if it’s noticeably different? What if I go to get an abortion and they get freaked out and then I get turned into a science experiment?” Liz rambled quietly. He rubbed her arm and tried not to think about how terrifying that was. It would be scary at any point in time, but it was particularly scary when she was the only thing keeping him alive.

“We could get Kyle to do an ultrasound,” Michael suggested, “See if the difference is. And you’re, what, eight weeks along? You have a little bit of time to decide.”

“Yeah,” Liz sighed, nodding her head, “I just know I can’t give it up for adoption. I can’t put another child who might have powers, might not, into a situation like that.” Michael didn’t say ‘thank you’ but he thought about it.

“Whatever you do decide on, I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”

“Thank you, Mikey.”

Liz decided to go through with it three months after Max died.

Michael watched her like a hawk.

Kyle did what he could to watch her, but it was mostly Michael. His focus pretty quickly shifted from reviving Max to making sure Liz was okay. As she crossed over into her second trimester, things began to get a little more worrisome. While the baby looked like a normal fetus and seemed to be growing like one, it was affecting Liz worse than it should’ve.

Normal pregnancy cravings became something intolerable. She couldn’t ever figure out what she wanted so badly and Michael had it in the back of his head that maybe it was nothing she could find on Earth. For a week or two, she became really attracted to the smell of acetone and Michael almost had a heart attack. The cravings would bother her, distract her, and some days she would sit in the corner of the bunker and just cry her frustrations out. Neither of them got much done on those days.

Even then, that felt like the easy part. She would get dizzy multiple times a day and she would get sick even more than that. While they tried to convince themselves it was normal, there was still the fact that it never seemed to stop. Worst of all, it was paired with pains. Liz had originally compared them to period cramps, but they progressively got more and more vicious with time. Some days she couldn’t get out of bed. At some point, she was unable to get out of bed anymore at all.

Michael moved in with her at that stage of things. They got a tiny one-bedroom apartment and slept in the same bed. She would wake him when she needed him and he never minded. She was what he had left and she was ill. He was going to do what she needed.

Each day, she looked worse. She stopped gaining any weight once she hit her third trimester, rather appearing to almost lose it instead. Her face was pale and she would sweat all day and night, consumed with hot flashes that left her a shaking and sweating mess. She was weak and she was in pain and she was hardly even Liz anymore.

“We need to do something,” Michael said, his voice leaving no room for argument. Kyle was coming by to do his weekly checkup and even he was struggling to hide his worry on how bad she was doing. “This isn’t okay, this is going to kill her.”

When Kyle didn’t deny that, it made things ungodly worse.

“What is making her sick, Kyle? What do we need to do?” Michael demanded, “Is the baby even still alive? Is it, like, infecting her or something?”

“Michael, I don’t know what-”

“Well, you need to know!” he snapped, “Liz needs to survive. You’re going to figure out what is happening and if you can’t, then I’m risking bringing her to an actual fucking doctor.”

He went back into the room to find Liz already asleep, her face almost as white as the sheets. It made him feel sick. He crawled up behind her and pulled her hair away from her neck and face, balling it up at the top of her head. He laid with her and tried his best to will her survival into existence.

At this point in time, he had decided he didn’t need anyone but Liz to survive. She was the only one that wasn’t going to leave and he wasn’t going to leave her. And that meant making sure she was okay.

Kyle returned a few days later and said a C-section was the best option.

Ileana Paloma Rosa Ortecho-Evans was born seven and a half months after Max died.

She was tiny.

Michael didn’t really know how to process just how tiny she was. She was the perfect size to fit in his palms and that’s all that was needed. He felt almost unworthy to hold her. Yet, he was the first one outside of Kyle who was allowed to.

He had looked her over extensively and, somehow, she was fine. He’d explained that usually babies born that early had issues breathing at the least, especially when they were that small, but she seemed to be fine. Because they didn’t want any other doctor or nurse looking at her too hard just in case, he gave Michael the assignment to watch her and alert him if he noticed any issues at all. He took it like it was the most important job in the world. And, honestly, it was.

She fit in the crook of his arm perfectly‒it helped that she wasn’t even the length of his forearm. He moved slowly back into the hospital room where Liz was still sound asleep. Already, she looked better. Color was coming back to her cheeks. Arturto sat beside her.

“I bet she’s excited to go back to work once she heals,” Artutro said. He didn’t ask to see the baby and Michael wondered if it was because he was just so focused on making sure his baby was alright.

“Yeah,” Michael confirmed, “She is.”

“And you’re going to help her?” he asked.

“Absolutely,” Michael said without hesitation, gulping softly as the baby in his arm wrapped her hand around his finger. She held on tight. “I’m not going anywhere, I swear.” He wasn’t like everyone else.

Arturo nodded and kissed the back of Liz’ hand. “Thank you.”

When Liz woke up and got the first glimpse at her daughter, they both smiled for the first time in a long time. She was still weak from her surgery, but she managed to sit up a little and he sat beside her as she held her baby. It looked right.

“She’s so little,” Liz gushed, sniffling as tears brimmed her eyes. It didn’t even phase Michael anymore. He’d seen her cry so many times now that it was almost just apart of things.

“I know,” Michael said, smiling over her shoulder at Iliana. Her head was a little big and her eyes were even bigger and her skin wasn’t exactly a pleasing color, but, fuck, she was theirs. He couldn’t call her cute, but it took no time to fall in love with her.

Liz leaned into him and relaxed, breathing slow and steady. They both just stared at her for awhile. She was hard not to look at. All Liz’s suffering had ended in a person. It seemed unreal. Well, then again, everything in the last few months had seemed unreal.

“I wish Max was here,” Liz whispered to him a little bit later. Michael chewed on his lip.

“I know,” he said. What he didn’t say was ‘I do too’ or ‘I wish Alex was here’ or ‘I wonder if Isobel would want to meet her niece’ or ‘do you think Maria knows you had a baby?’ because none of those felt like comforting statements. They weren’t comforting statements. They were the ones he thought about non-stop though.

His body ached for the people he’d lost, but he hoped one day he wouldn’t care anymore.

Days passed, though, and things just went back to the way they were. Well, not really. They had a baby now. Iliana slept in a bassinet less than a foot away from Liz’s side of the bed, perfect reaching distance for her even on the nights that Michael was on baby duty.

Occasionally, Michael would lay in bed and wonder if he was doing the right thing. That dark little voice in his head said that he was too happy on some days and that he had forgotten about Max and that he had merely stepped into his shoes. However, then he’d look over to Liz’s determined face and he’d feel like he was going to be alright. Liz was his lifeline.

And, with time, Liz got back to her old self. She was walking around and holding conversations and outsmarting him. It felt like she’d finally come home and he couldn’t have been more thankful. Kyle slowly began to withdraw again once he was no longer needed, but it was alright. They had each other and a baby to focus on.

They were too busy with working and adjusting to parenthood that they couldn’t focus on reviving Max, but, somehow, they were remembering how to be happy.

“Ay dios mio, Mikey, look at that face, she is mean-mugging you,” Liz said as she held the month old baby while Michael shook up her bottle. He laughed at the little glare on her face that seemed to resemble the Ortecho sisters more and more each day, pressing a kiss to her head before handing Liz the bottle.

“You’re going back to work tomorrow,” he pointed out, watching her features morph into a broad smile, “You excited?”

“Listen, I love this, I love her, and I love spending all my time with you,” Liz promised, following it up with a sigh, “But I am so ready. Even if it is just imaging at the hospital, I’m here for it. I need something to do. Also I’m tired of living off a mechanics salary, no offense.”

Michael snorted, “None taken.”

“And you,” Liz prodded, kicking him lightly, “How are you?”

“I’m good.”

“Are you?” she asked, eyeing him, “Have you talked to Alex or Isobel recently?” Liz knew everything, every last detail about basically everything that had ever happened. She knew how he felt about Alex and she knew how badly he missed Isobel. However, she also told him he shouldn’t have taken a step away from Alex whenever he felt like he was crashing. She’d told him that was what scared her about her feelings for Max, but it turns out all she needed to do was to give in.

And Michael really was ready to give in.

“Nah, but it’s okay, they made their choice,” Michael said, brushing it off. He wasn’t angry at Alex‒Alex had left for a good cause and his lack of keeping in touch made sense. He was, however, unimaginably pissed at Isobel for dropping off the face of the earth.

“Okay,” Liz said, “You know you can vent to me if you need to.”

“I know, Lizzie.”

She smiled and scrunched up her nose adorably at him.

They went to bed shockingly early that night. Iliana went down at 8 and they were dead asleep before the clock hit 8:30. Michael had taken off the following day so that Liz could enjoy her first day at work without stressing which meant he was also on baby duty, so it meant he couldn’t bring himself to regret going to bed so early.

However, he still had to be kicked awake when Iliana woke up a few minutes shy of midnight.

“Mikey,” Liz groaned, kicking him not too unlike a child, “Your turn.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he breathed, dragging himself out of bed and going to pick up Iliana and take her into the living room to get her a bottle.

He shushed her softly as he held her to his bare chest with one hand, rubbing his eye with the other one. He flicked the lightswitch on and that seemed to assure her even more that she was going to be fed and she slowly quieted down more. He used his telekinesis to make her bottle which Liz had been vocally jealous of even if he used it to help her all the time.

“You know, you’re really lucky you have Uncle Mikey instead of your daddy on nights like this,” Michael said between a yawn, “‘Cause he used to lose it when I woke him up. Now, he’d probably be a whole lot nicer to you, but I’m just saying.”

He’d barely finished making her bottle whenever there was a knock on the door.

He furrowed his eyebrows and looked at the clock, seeing it glaring a bright green 12:04 on it. There was actually no reason for anyone to be at their door this last. Michael did his best to keep his heartbeat still as he walked towards the door and looked through the peephole.

Alex returned to Roswell nine months after Max died.

Michael felt like he was hallucinating.

He opened the door carefully, regulating his breathing and trying not to jump to conclusions about what exactly was happening. Still, when the door was open, it was really Alex. His hair was longer and he was dressed in a way that screamed Alex. He had a nose ring again‒this time it was a stud on the side rather than septum, but still. He looked phenomenal. It took everything in him not to attack him in kisses.

“Hi,” Michael said softly. It took him a few seconds to realize that Alex’s eyes were trained on the baby he was feeding and then it took a couple seconds more to put together that he was probably jumping to conclusions. He left Michael when he was a mess and he returned to see him shirtless with a baby.

“Should I g‒”

“She’s Liz’s,” Micahel clarified. Alex’s eyes got impossibly wide.

“You and Liz‒”

“No! No,” he laughed, his hands shaking enough to get milk on Iliana’s cheek, “Max.”

Alex’s eyes formed sad realization and nodded. Then they just stared at each other for a minute. This didn’t feel real. Michael had been adjusting to a life with no one except for Liz and Iliana and it was weird to welcome someone home. But, god, it felt good to see Alex.

“Come in,” Michael said after a moment. Alex smiled and walked in, looking around.

“When Kyle said you got an apartment, I was impressed,” Alex said, “But now that I see you’re just staying with Liz it makes more sense.”

“Well, we live together, like, permanently,” Michael explained, sitting on the couch and adjusting the bottle in Iliana’s mouth.

“Oh?” Alex asked, sitting on the other side. Michael nodded and then gestured towards the baby. “Is she showing any signs of getting alien abilities or anything?”

“Not yet,” Michael said, eyes drifting off of Alex and down to the baby in his arms. She was still so small. “But Liz had a really horrible pregnancy and I think it was because she’s not completely human. I was reading, like, a ton of research on pregnancies and stuff and I think that her body was registering the baby as, like, a parasite and was sending antibodies to try and kill it which, then, made Liz extremely sick. We don’t know for sure or anything, but that’s the only thing that makes sense.”

“Fuck, that’s horrible,” Alex said, “She’s okay now though, right?”

“Yeah,” Michael confirmed, looking up to him with a smile, “She’s asleep though. She goes back to work tomorrow, though. Hope everyone’s ready for Iliana spending a whole lot more time with Papi Arturo.”

“Oh, I didn’t even think about that, how did he take everything with Max?” Alex asked, voice hushed. Everyone in Roswell was under the assumption that Max had just up and left. Arturo wasn’t any different.

“Fine, not like Liz really gave him an option to feel any other way. She basically just went up to him and was like ‘I’m pregnant and I’m keeping it and that’s all I have to say on the matter’. He hasn’t mentioned Max.”

“Man, it’s gonna real suck for him if you guys bring him back,” Alex laughed.

Things fell silent again as they just stared. It only broke when Michael propped Iliana on his shoulder to burp her and Alex seemed to remember he had other stuff to talk about. There was a million things to talk about. Michael didn’t even know where to start.

“So, uh, how is everyone? Isobel, Maria, Kyle, I guess,” Alex laughed. Michael couldn’t even manage a smile.

“I don’t know,” he answered honestly, “Isobel left not long after you and hasn’t kept in touch, Maria cut everyone off, and Kyle is just off being Kyle, I guess. It’s basically just been me and Liz.”

Alex frowned, “I didn’t know that.”

“You missed a lot,” Michael said softly.

“I missed you,” Alex blurted out and Michael couldn’t take his eyes away, “Seriously, I missed you so much it hurt. I didn’t know I could ever miss you as much as I did when I was at literal war, but, fuck, I did. If you weren’t holding a baby right now, I would probably kiss you until I couldn’t breathe.” Michael smiled wildly, his cheeks heating up and his heart thudding. It was the best thing he’d ever fucking heard. “Sorry if that was too straight forward, but I’m so tired of wasting time. I miss you.”

“I missed you too,” Michael agreed, suddenly extremely eager to go put Iliana back to bed and make Liz take over, “But you probably shouldn’t make me want to put the baby down. She doesn’t really accept not being held until she’s asleep.”

Alex chuckled, “You guys don’t just let her cry?”

“Fuck no,” Michael said, “I don’t want her to ever think we’re not there.” Alex nodded with the same big smile.

“What’s her name?” he asked, leaning closer to get a look at her, “God, she looks like Liz.” Michael could smell his cologne.

“Iliana,” he answered, nodding his agreement.

“That’s really pretty.”

“I know.”

“Can I hold you?” Alex asked her in a baby voice that Michael had never heard. It struck him to his core and he suddenly felt lightheaded. Michael slowly passed her into his arms.

Alex looked good with a baby. It was annoyingly attractive and Michael wondered if he even would’ve noticed that before Iliana was born. He didn’t remember ever finding someone’s maternal or paternal skills inherently attractive before, but seeing Alex rock her to sleep felt like the sexiest thing that had ever happened.

“Have you guys been working on bringing Max back?” he asked. Michael felt that attraction immediately bleed into guilt.

“Not recently. We’ve been just so focused on her.”

“That makes sense.”

Once she was asleep, Michael promised Alex that he’d be right back out. He placed Iliana on his side of the bed and created a pillow wall around her. He spared a look at Liz too and saw her out like a light. He wondered if she would be happy to see Alex in the morning. He hoped so.

When Michael came back out of the room, he found Alex only a few steps away. He looked serious and his face was illuminated by the bright kitchen lights. Michael hesitantly stepped closer.

“Are you home for good?” he asked. Alex touched him first, grabbing his arms and pulling him in close.

“Yes,” he said, “I’m home for good and I want us to work. I’ve missed you so fucking much, Michael. You don’t know.”

“We need to talk.”

“We will.”

Alex closed the space completely, kissing him like he was coming up for air. Michael kissed him back just as feverently, leading him back to the couch. He was reminded that, while he could survive with only Liz, he was never really living until he had Alex.

Maria listened to them ten months after Max died.

Liz and Michael had both gone to her bar before they opened and decided no wasn’t an answer. Except it made it a lot easier whenever Maria smile at the sight of them.

“Long time no see,” she mused. They both look at each other like they were waiting for the catch. “Look, I can’t hold a grudge that long. Well, I can, but it’s not healthy. I was just waiting for you guys to come see me. I gotta admit, I’m a little annoyed it’s taken so long but I’m glad to see you.”

“I know it’s not really an excuse, but I had a baby and I really lost track of time,” Liz said. Maria’s whole face transformed and she was on the other side of the bar in an instant.

“What? Oh my god, I didn’t know,” she gushed, hugging Liz. Liz folded into her the way Michael had seen her do with Alex a month prior. He always seemed to forget that they were basically inseparable at one point.

“Before you guys delve into the Iliana talk, I wanted to apologize,” Michael said. Maria looked over Liz’s head at him, still not letting go. “I should’ve been completely honest with you and I also should’ve told you what was going on with Liz. I couldn’t do anything about everyone else separating from us, but I could’ve reached out to you. I fucked up multiple times and I’m sorry.”

Maria breathed slow and steady and smiled. “You’re forgiven.”

“That easy?”

“Well, you both are going to have to pull, like, a lot of the friendship weight for a little bit just so I know you’re serious, but I think we’ll be able to get back to good.” Maria assured. Michael closed his eyes in relief.

And he smiled.

Isobel came back to Roswell eleven months after Max died.

“Hi.”

Michael just stared at her. He had never felt so much negativity towards Isobel in his life. Unlike with Alex and Maria, he didn’t feel that urge to hug her and ignore the problem. Because she was the problem. Michael had always gone out of his way to be there for her and, when they needed her, she was gone. He knew she had her own things to deal with, but she should’ve come to him. They could’ve healed together. Instead she was a new level of selfish.

“How did you get my address?” Michael asked. Isobel flinched at his tone.

“Michael, I‒” She paused for a moment and then sighed. “I got it from Alex.”

Michael turned up his nose. He was going to have to talk to Alex about that. It’d been two months of being back together and they were doing good, but clearly he didn’t know when to keep his address a secret.

“What do you want?”

“To apologize,” she said, “I shouldn’t have left.”

“Damn right you shouldn’t have left,” he spat, “We needed you.”

“I know and I’m sorry! I just… I needed to escape,” she said. Michael scoffed, shaking his head. Like clockwork, Iliana started crying and left Michael having to deal with his sister wondering why there was a baby crying.

“None of your business,” he said, closing the door a little bit so she couldn’t investigate, “You didn’t want anything to do with me or anyone else, so it’s none of your business.”

“Michael, I told you I was going to come back, I just needed some time,” Isobel sighed, “You don’t know what I was going through.”

“Yeah, and you didn’t even give me a chance to try. I have always been there for you, Isobel, and you just treated me like shit. I didn’t deserve that from you,” Michael said erestly, shifting from foot to foot as he tried to tune out Iliana’s crying. He hated that sound. He just wanted to hold her all the time so she never cried. But he also didn’t want to give Isobel the gift of seeing her.

“No, you didn’t and I’m sorry. I will be paying that price for the rest of my life,” she said sternly. He almost believed her. “Why is there a baby crying? Did you get Maria pregnant?”

“None of your business.”

“Michael, please. Will you just give me a chance to make it up to you?” she begged. He huffed a laugh.

“Yeah, I might’ve if you would’ve come home after a couple of days. You’ve been gone almost an entire year. Fuck that. I don’t need this.”

“Michael! Listen to me,” Isobel said, tears in her eyes as she put her hand on the door. For a moment, she looked like his sister and not the girl who abandoned him. “I think I know how to bring Max back.”

He froze.

“I have spent the last year trying to get stronger and I have. I think I know how we can do this,” she said and his stomach turned. He wanted to turn her away, to tell her no, to say he didn’t need her help.

But the fact of the matter was there was a baby in the next room who might have a chance to know her father if Isobel was being honest.

“I’m listening.”

The next month was full of trying to work with Isobel and not scream about how angry he was. Alex helped. Every time he felt like he was going to explode, he would soothe him. Liz was the best at it though. She also wasn’t too happy with Isobel, but she had mastered the art of being completely passive aggressive and bitchy while also accepting help. It was fun to watch.

However, Isobel really did have a point. She had honed her powers in a way that even Michael hadn’t. She could do all sorts of stuff and she didn’t struggle too much. She helped Michael got to the point he could heal. And, one day, he actually hugged her goodbye.

“Are you gonna forgive her?” Liz asked as they climbed into bed that night. Michael sighed and shrugged.

“I don’t know,” he admitted honestly, “It feels like she’s really trying and it seems like she put her time away to good use, I just… There’s no reason why she couldn’t keep in touch.”

“I know, Mikey,” Liz said, patting his chest, “I support whatever decision you make.”

Michael stared at the ceiling for a long while, weighing all of the options that he had. It’d been one hell of a year and he was eager for a break, but it still seemed like there was major fuckery in the future. It didn’t seem like anything would ever end.

“Liz?” he asked in the darkness. He didn’t really expect an answer, but he got one anyway.

“Yeah?”

“If we do figure out how to bring Max back, what does that mean for us?” It wasn’t a secret that, if they were successful, there was no way they’d be able to continue on like they had been. They’d shared a bed for seven months now. Even now that Alex was home, Michael spent at least six nights a week in bed with Liz and Iliana. That wasn’t an option once Max was home. None of this was an option once Max came home.

That made him feel empty.

“I don’t know,” Liz replied honestly, scooting a little closer. She put her head on his arm and he just pulled her in all the way.

“I know she’s not my baby,” Michael whispered, “But I don’t want to go back to not taking care of her everyday. I don’t want to go back to not seeing you every day.”

Liz was quiet for a moment, her long eyelashes brushing against his shoulder each time she blinked.

“Maybe we can get like a three bedroom house,” Liz suggested softly, “One for me and Max, one for Illy, one for you and Alex. That could work, right?”

Michael huffed at the idea. “It’d have to be a big house to get either of them to agree.”

“True, but four paychecks‒we could do it.”

Michael sighed and nodded. He hoped they could do it.

And that hope extended to something greater whenever they stepped into the cave during the thunderstorm. Both Michael and Isobel were vibrating with a power-strengthening serum Liz had managed to concoct and they were about to try their hardest to get shit back to normal. Or, at least, normal for Roswell.

Alex kissed him good luck and Isobel gave a reassuring look. He decided he would give it a shot, even if they failed. He looked up to Liz last and saw her give him the biggest smile in the world. She believed in him. If no one else did, she did.

That seemed like the most important thing he’d ever had.

A year after Max Evans died, he took his first breath of life again.

#michael & liz #michael & liz fic #malex #malex fic #echo #echo fic #roswell new mexico #roswell new mexico fic #rnm #rnm fic #michael guerin #michael guerin fic #alex manes #alex manes fic #liz ortecho #liz ortecho fic

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