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babyflossy · 4 years ago

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long overdue | l.dh

pairing: haechan x reader

requested: yes! sorry this took so long :(

summary: when you move back home after a few years apart, haechan starts to see you in a different light, and eventually the tension between you overpowers your worries about ruining your friendship.

genre/warnings: bestfriend to lovers au, smut (dirty talk, slight overstim if you squint?), fluff

word count: 4k

since your first day of elementary school, donghyuck had been your best friend. on that very first day, he had shared his animal crackers with you on the playground bench when you'd dropped yours, and you'd been inseparable ever since. even when your parents moved you away for the majority of middle school, you talked over the phone, you'd even sent each other handwritten letters through the post until donghyuck got his first phone.

the summer before high school started, your parents decided it was best to move back, and suddenly things were different between you and donghyuck. for one, he'd adopted haechan as a nickname, which you couldn't deny suited him more than you'd ever admit, but those four years had seen a lot of changes in the both of you. changes you couldn't ignore.

that stupid smirk he was always wearing was one. the growth-spurt and the jawline and the attractive shape of his shoulders had just been the things you noticed first, let alone the flirty humour he was so comfortable with. nevertheless, the two of you fell back into your old best-friend ways since elementary school; ice cream on fridays, although now they were at two in the morning instead of the afternoon, burgers at the diner on wednesdays because wednesdays are the worst day of the week.

these thoughts cross your mind once again as the boy in question slides into the chair opposite you in the cafeteria, pushing a tray towards you. "they had fries," is the only thing he says to you before he turns to jaemin and starts talking quietly about how they're going to cheat on their chemistry test. you murmur a thank you, picking a few up and stuffing them into your mouth as you continue your conversation with mark, your replacement whilst you were gone, as hyuck had so elegantly put it.

"are you coming to lucas' party tonight?" he asks, stealing some of the fries in front of you before you can swat his hand away. opposite you, haechan has blocked jaemin's voice out of his head so he can hear your answer, hating the way his heart skips a beat in anticipation. these parties were nothing new, you went to almost every single one, but haechan never got used to the clothes you wore, so much more revealing than the ones you to school. it was undeniable in those moments the way his cheeks flushed at the sight of you.

when he had first noticed these thoughts about you, he had been terrified. you were his childhood friend, how could he think of you as anything more than that? surely it would break the two of you apart if he so much as mentioned it to you? over the years since you moved back, however, the two of you had fallen into a comfortable state of flirtatiousness. he would say something suggestive and you would simply laugh and retort with a quip equally as witty. it was second nature, now; the longing glances, the way your hands brushed together when you walked side by side, the way his heart fluttered whenever you stole his hoodies, but only the ones that still smelt of him. your voice brings him back to the present.

"as if i would miss a party," you laugh, and the sound seems brighter every time to haechan, "are you driving everyone?" when mark shakes his head you raise your eyebrows in question and he nods to jeno, the dedicated sober friend for this week. the one good thing about not having your driver's license is that you were never denoted to that role.

as the school day comes to a close you meet haechan outside the back entrance, ready to walk home. the proximity of your houses meant it was always convenient for you both to walk home together, and it made haechan feel better to see you get home safe, he would never tell you that, though. he stands to the side of the crowd streaming out the door and waves you over when he spots your head in the sea of pupils. you shoot him a sunny smile that has his heartbeat pumping in his eardrums.

"you ready, princess?" the familiar smirk is present and you roll your eyes at the nickname, not allowing him the satisfaction of knowing how much it affected you, "you going home after tonight?" he asks as you break out the school car park and onto the pavement, steps falling into rhythm.

"i'm not sure yet, i doubt i'll be able to sneak back in," you scrunch your nose in contemplation, weighing up your options, "i'll probably tell my parents i'm staying at yeri's or something."

you miss the frown that settles on his face, "and stay at lucas'? alone?" haechan tries not to show how much he doesn't like that idea. lucas was a good person, he knows, but he would worry about you no matter who's house you would stay at. it was just part of your relationship at this point.

"yeah?" you stare at him in confusion, oblivious to the way his eyes flicker away when you try to meet his gaze. "what, you want me to come and sleep with you?" as soon as the words left your mouth you realised the second meaning to them and tried to ignore how your face blazed. it was your turn to avoid his eyes as you tried to pretend you had meant that word choice.

"if that's what you want, babygirl," a wink punctuates his words and heat spreads through you. you roll your eyes at him again.

jeno had, as promised, come to collect you from your house, laughing as you ran through your garden to avoid being spotted by your parents. jeno's car is smaller than mark's, all the seats already taken, but before you can ask where you're supposed to sit he presses on the accelerator. hands come to brace you as you nearly fall and your placed onto someone's lap. you can tell it's haechan from the expensive cologne that overwhelms your senses, the warm hands on your waist maintaining their position even after jeno's driving at a normal speed again.

the drive to lucas' house is short but bumpy and you grasp the seat in front of you to stop the jostling. when the car speeds over a bump haechan's fingers dig into your sides, his forehead falling onto your shoulder. you try and turn around to face him but his hands dig in further, stopping you from moving anymore. just as you're about to ask him what's wrong you feel a hardness pressing against the inside of your thigh and your eyes widen.

the flirty jokes you always exchanged meant something, you knew, but the feeling of him underneath you makes you heat up. you're frozen for a moment before a wave of smugness washes through you. haechan was always the one to make you flustered, and to know you had the same effect on him was something you wouldn't forget.

when the car finally stops in front of lucas' house, the others pile out before you two and you face him, raising your eyebrows. you open your mouth to tease him but he beats you to it, "fuck off." is all he says before he stalks towards the front door. you have to jog to keep up with him.

"really? in the car?" haehan rolls his eyes but the blush on his cheeks and the darkness in his eyes is obvious.

"if you weren't wiggling your ass, this wouldn't have happened–"

"i was not wiggling my ass, it's not my fault you're just needy," he stops walking at your words and spins around to face you, eyes narrowed in a look you assume is supposed to be intimidating. it's kinda hot, though, you think.

"i am not needy!" the laugh you let out only seems to upset him further and he takes a step towards you, "i can show you what needy is–"

"are you guys coming or what?" jaemin shouts from the doorway and haechan’s eyes flicker away from you to glare at him. before you can get another word out he’s walking as fast as he can away from you, shoulders squared of defensively. you can hear the pounding music from the house and you decided to forget about his attitude for the night and have as much fun as you can.

five drinks in and haechan is the last thing on your mind. the harsh liquid had burned at first but as lucas offers you a sixth you don't feel it slip down your throat. he grins and you match it, head spinning and vision blurring, the bassline of the music pounding in your ears. lucas has always been a great host, and he laughs at the way stumble from the kitchen counter he sits on. litres upon litres of free alcohol fills the table in front of you and you reach for a colourful blue bottle that fizzes when you twist the top off. he passes you a red plastic cup and the drink spills over the sides as you try and pour it, lucas' laugh piercing through your head which starts throbbing with the beginnings of a headache.

as if he can sense the state you're in, jeno appears in your line of sight, head shaking disapprovingly. you put up a fight when he takes the cup out of your hand and tips it down the sink but give up quickly when jeno shoots you a stern stare. lucas has already slinked off back to his living room where the rest of the guests reside, hands waving at people as a pretty brunette pulls him to the corner of the room. "you're already drunk, y/n."

"no i'm not," you insist but you can hear the way they slur together. the sound of them is foreign to your ears and they make you giggle, the sixth shot you had taken moments before starting to take effect. when you try and walk towards the drink's table your knees buckle under you and jeno has to catch you to stop you falling to the floor.

"this is why i hate being the sober friend," he mumbles as he sets you down on the floor to prevent you from hurting yourself, pulling your hands away when they reach to pull on his hair, muttering about his hair colour.

"now that, i whole-heartedly agree with," the new voice belongs to johnny, who frowns in amusement at the position you're in, giggling hysterically at jeno's hair. "hyuck's in a similar shape, we just put him upstairs in the spare room."

"can you help me take her up? she can't walk properly." their conversation falls on deaf ears to you and you're staring at everything in the kitchen and yet nothing at all as they both take one of your arms, hoisting you into an upright position. standing up, you last all but five seconds on your own before you put all your weight into them and allow yourself to be carried up the stairs.

true to johnny's word, haechan is sat on the edge of the bed, head between his knees whilst jaehyun crouches to talk to him, rubbing his back with a sympathetic smile on his face.

you call out when you see him, "haechannie!" and his head shoots up at the sound of your voice, all the darkness of his eyes from earlier dissipated.

"y/n!" johnny and jeno place you carefully on the bed next to him and meet jaehyun by the door to watch you. haechan's arm is already around your shoulder, your head planted on his shoulder, unclear if you're passed out already or not.

"where are they staying?" jaehyun asks, eyes not leaving the pair in front of him, grimacing when you bump heads with each other.

"i think here?"

"you really wanna leave them alone like this?" johnny questions as he watches you press kisses to the side of haechan's neck, turning to face him.

jeno considers his options for a moment. leave the two of you alone drunk and clearly ready to omit any rational thoughts, or stay here and try to keep you off each other. or, he supposes, he could bribe someone else to do it for him. yes, that's what he'll do. he'll find jaemin.

once the others leave and you're left alone, hands are immediately on your waist, pulling you into a kiss. haechan rubs his thumbs into the exposed skin of your middle, pressing his lips to yours in such a desperate manner you can do nothing but sit and kiss back. the hands pull you onto his lap and you waste no time threading your fingers into his hair, deepening the kiss, subconsciously grinding your hips down onto him.

"i've wanted to do this for ages," he moans into your neck, fingers hastily skimming over your skin, trying to touch you everywhere at once.

"i told you you were needy," the reminder does nothing to halt his actions, accepting your words with nothing but a hum, hands now making their way up your shirt to the clasp of your bra.

just as he's battling with the article of clothing, the door shoots open again and you fall off his lap and onto the matress. jaemin walks in, snickering at nothing and plops himself in between you on the bed, head falling onto haechan's shoulder.

"hi guys!" the tone of his voice gives away just how much he's drunk already, and you eye haechan over jaemin's mop of blue hair, pouting in disappointment.

a pounding head greets you in the morning and even though you and haechan both remember what had happened the night before, neither of you can stop blushing for long enough to bring it up. so you don't, the fear of ruining your friendship too great a risk for you.

it's a hot summer day and you meet haechan and jeno along with jaemin and renjun at the ice cream shop near your house. it's a brightly decorated new place that offers a mammoth selection of different toppings, which is partly the reason you get bullied when you choose an ice lolly instead. in your defense, it was boiling outside and ice cream is dehydrating.

haechan is cursing every god he knows of as you sit opposite him in the booth, lips wrapped so prettily around your ice lolly. he blinks harshly when you lick the side to stop the juice dripping onto your hand, still talking to renjun. in front of him sits the tub of ice cream he previously been so excited to try and yet now he can't seem to eat it, thoughts elsewhere.

in his head, he curses himself for thinking like this, for thinking about how amazing your lips would feel wrapped around his–

"dude are you okay? you're staring at your ice cream like it holds the secrets to the universe." jeno's laugh cuts through his mind and his cheeks burn. he nods wordlessly, searching for something, anything, else to think of, instead of the blood rushing straight to his dick.

later that same day, when he's back in his bedroom alone, you're the only thought that crosses his mind. he thinks about that night at lucas' party, how you had both been so ready to forget anything holding you back, he thinks about the car ride there, how cocky you had been when he got hard from you sitting on his lap. it was clear you felt the same way, at least, he hoped you did.

in your own bedroom, you're having a similar crisis to your best friend. it hadn't been easy to ignore to way he was staring at you earlier, you had even exaggerated your eating just to tease him. you wondered if he wanted you just as bad as you wanted him. maybe you should ask. no, that was too risky. you needed something less obvious.

"you wanna come over to watch that new movie? i'm bored."

haehcan reads the words over and over again, trying to decipher any ulterior motives you might have, yet again that may just be him wishing for some. he takes a moment to reply, choosing his response carefully, even though he knew immediately he would be saying yes.

"sure, when?"

"tonight?"

once you had confirmed a meeting time, haechan had but two hours to compose himself. he didn't know what to expect, after all, you could have invited him over simply to watch the movie, however much he hoped that was only a cover. a cover for an empty apartment, and some suppressed desires.

when you open your front door, you're already worked up enough. it takes all the self restraint in you to not pounce on the boy in front of as soon as he steps into your hallway. he seems to be having a similar internal debate and you feel the air shift as he drops his bag next to your door, stepping towards you.

neither of you want to make the first move, the tension growing until you can’t stand in anymore, reaching towards him, knotting your fingers behind his neck and pulling him down to you. he closes the gap between you, lips smashing against yours in such desperation you would tease him if you didn’t feel the same way.

“where?” he mumbles against your lips, hands gripping up and down your sides.

“bedroom.” is all you reply before he wraps his arms around your waist, shuffling the both of you into your bedroom and shutting the door with his foot. he pushes you onto the bed and you let yourself fall, hair splaying out underneath you in a way he likes maybe too much.

his body follows yours and he slots between your legs perfectly, hands reclaiming their grip on your middle, fingers toying with the hem of your shirt. wherever his fingers slide over, goosebumps rise in their wake, sending shivers through you at their coldness.

your lips return to his and you tilt his head up to deepen the kiss, only breaking away to press open-mouthed kisses to the space under his ear, relishing in the way his breathing hitches in his throat. the kisses trail down his neck to his collarbone, biting down before sucking the area into your mouth. haechan lets out a sinful moan that goes straight to your core.

as soon as you pull you lips away from his body he pulls your shirt over your head, cursing at the lack of underwear, gaze locking in on the swell of your breasts, nipples hard in the cold air. “you had such a hard time taking it off last time,” you reason into his ear, pulling the lobe into your mouth and pulling before continuing, “i thought i would save you the trouble.”

“fuck, baby, you’re so hot,” his words are silenced by the moan you let out when his fingers come to toy with your nipples, rolling one between his digits. you can’t help but arch into him, legs closing around the thigh spreading them apart. it’s clear you’re already so turned on that haechan almost pities you as you grind against his thigh. “so hot, and needy it seems.”

“haechan,” you moan, hands coming to tug on his own shirt, pulling the material over his head and throwing it somewhere else in the room. “i need you so bad.”

“i know, baby,” he cooes, dropping his mouth to envelope your nipple in between his lips, “i’ll take care of you, don’t worry, princess.” the filthful nature of his words make your body heat up, the coldness of fingers now toying with the waistline of your shorts so much more noticeable.

the shorts are removed quickly, your panties following quickly. before you can process what he’s doing, his fingers are spreading your lips apart, lips blowing on your clit to watch the way you clench around nothing. you shiver, hands moving to grip his hair.

after admiring your pussy for a moment, he licks a thick stripe from your hole to your clit, stopping to suck the bud into his mouth, hands coming to press you into the matress when you buck up into him. his tongue laps over your most sensitive spot and he rubs your wetness over his fingers before pushing one into you, moaning at the tightness of your walls. the vibrations of his moan travel straight through your clit and you let out a shameful whine.

after working his finger in you for a few moments, he adds a second, closely followed by a third as he continues his assault on your clit. your moans are loud and non-stop, only stopping to warn him how close you are.

“cum on my tongue, babygirl,” the dirty words dripping from his tongue push you over the edge and you let go with a cry, tugging on the strands of haechan’s hair so hard it nearly hurts him.

“fuck, fuck, fuck,” is all you can say as haechan makes his way back up your body, pressing his lips back to yours. on his tongue, you can taste the sweetness of your own cum and you move away from him only to tug his bottom lip in between your teeth, pulling then sucking on it to numb the pain.

you make quick work of his jeans, helping him out of them and chucking them to the floor, shortly followed by his own underwear. from his view, you look stunning, eyes hooded and blown out with lust, lips red and wet from kissing, bruised almost.

he doesn’t say anything as he lines himself up with your enterance, rocking his hips forwards and filling you completely. the pleasure is almost too much for you, still sensitive from your orgasm only minutes prior, eyes rolling back at the way he fills you so well. haechan’s head falls to your shoulder as he gives himself a moment to calm down, biting into your shoulder when he pulls out to the tip.

“you take me so well, baby,” the words are hot in your ear, his breath fanning down your neck, “look at you, all spread out for me.”

you wrap your arms around his shoulders to steady yourself as he pushed back in, moaning into your shoulder at the feeling of you around him, tight, wet, hot. he can sense he won’t last long as he sets a fast pace, chasing his own high.

to make up for his fast-approaching orgasm, he takes your ankle into his hand, pulling your leg up to rest over his shoulder, the new angle allowing him to hit every sweet spot possible. the feeling leaves you paralyzed in pleasure, unable to do anything but chant his name.

“i’m gonna cum,” you mumble against him, whining out when his thumb comes down to rub fast circles on your clit.

“fuck,” haechan’s eyes are screwed shut and the sight is so other-wordly beautiful it almost makes you tear up. “i’m cumming.”

his hips stutter and the feeling of his cum filling you, some leaking onto the tops of your thigs, pushes you over the edge. your back arches as you cum over his cock, his hips still easing the both of you through your highs.

when you’ve calmed down, chest heaving as the aftershocks of your second orgasm ripple through you, he pulls out, wincing at the first flicker of overstimulation. he turns and presses a gentle kiss to your ankle, rubbing the fingers of his other hand over your cheekbone, relishing the fucked out expression on your face. he thinks this is the most beautiful you’ve ever looked, so exhuasted underneath him, sweat glistening over your skin.

“that was–”

“long overdue.”

he laughs an agreement out, falling next to you on the bed and lacing your fingers together. “we should watch movies together more often.”

a/n: the only thing i have to say is yikes at this point.

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lilyeholland · 4 years ago

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Driver’s License

[Luke Patterson x Reader]

Requested: YES! By my bestie @dakotagillespie !!! (go follow her, she makes amazing art♥).

Based off the song ‘driver’s license’ by Olivia Rodrigo

Summary: After a whole Spring and Summer of Luke teaching Y/N to drive, she’s finally ready to get her license and makes plans to take her boyfriend back to his parent’s after he plays at the Orpheum.

A/N: Bruh I’m literally making little mini series’ about Sunset Curve’s boo thangs before they died..... sorry for all the angst but also I’m not sorry at all :)

“Pull over, pull over, pull over,” Luke repeats enthusiastically, scared but still giggling at how horrible of a driver you are.

You quickly turn on your blinker and pull off to the side of the road, feeling your heart beat all the way down your arms. You felt like it was making the whole car shake.

You look over at Luke, eyes wide, nervous to look into his eyes after almost killing him. ‘Almost killing him’ is an exaggeration. You only swerved into the other lane a little because you thought you saw a squirrel in the middle of the road. Turns out, it was just a leaf.

“Well that was,” Luke struggles to find the right words, “an adventure.” He looks at your face, sees your on the verge of tears and trying so hard to bottle it up and shifts his position in the passenger’s seat. “Hey, it’s okay. I sucked at driving too when I first started.”

“You think I suck at driving?” You nearly shout at him, only half of you taking offense to that.

“Wait, no! No, no, no. That’s not what I meant, I mean-” he takes a deep breath and huffs it out in a laugh.

You give him a tilted look, your pending tears now fading away as a smile crosses her face. “I know what you meant, Luke,” you interrupt his babbling and reach out for his hand. “I’m just giving you a hard time.”

“Well, don’t do that!” He bats his eyelashes as he looks back up at you, your hand fitting snug in his. “Also, please try not to kill me anymore, okay? I wanna be able to live to play the Orpheum.”

“AH!” you shout in a teasing-defensive tone, taking the map from off the dashboard and hitting him with it.

“Hey, hey, hey!” he shouts as he reaches through your hands to tickle your sides, knowing it’s your weakness. Immediately, your hands fly to his to try and get him to stop. Loud laughs and high pitched squeals fill the car as you fight off each other’s loving touches.

“This probably looks so wrong,” Luke say through a breathless laugh.

“What do you mean?” you get out once you’re able to stop laughing.

“A pulled over, fogged up car that’s rocking back and forth? People are gonna think we’re up to something naughty.” Luke decrescendos his voice so its merely a whisper by the end of his sentence.

“And what if we were?” You tease, brushing the mess of hair out of his face.

“Aaah,” he nods his head and smiles. “I like the way you think, Y/N,” he leans up closer to you, his nose brushing against yours until your lips meet. He pushes himself up more so he’s taller than you, continuing to kiss you and hold the side of your face in his hand.

“I’m never gonna get my license if we keep doing this every time you take me driving,” you say in between kisses, your smile clashing on top of his.

He groans and pulls himself off of you. “You take your test in what? Like a week?”

“On Wednesday, yeah.”

“So, we’re fiiiiineee,” he sings. “We should still probably take you home so your mom doesn’t flip out on me for having you out too late. One of our mothers already hates me, we don’t need both of them to.”

“Luke, don’t say that. Your mom doesn’t hate you.” You reassure him, looking longingly into his now sad eyes.

“She sure acts like it,” he looks down at his hands and his voice gets quiet. Noticing the tension in the car he’s created, he quickly perks up and says, “switch me spots, I’ll take you home,” with a smile and a wink.

You hadn’t talked to Luke in a while. Every time you went by his house, he wasn’t there because him and his mom were fighting. You hated seeing how estranged he was from his mother and wished you could do something to help.

Today, you drove by his house to tell him the exciting news that you had passed your driver’s test!! To your luck, he was outside pulling some weeds when you pulled up in the driveway. He gave you a look and wiggled his eyebrows once he realized it was you driving that 92′ Chevy Blazer. You quickly got out of the car and ran into his arms.

You couldn’t decide if he was more cute or more hot with his cut off shirt, gardening gloves and sunhat.

“I didn’t expect to see you here,” you smile as you rub in some of the sunscreen on his cheek.

“Yeah, mom’s making me do yardwork before band practice.” He rolls his eyes and scoffs. “But look at you! You got your license, and a car?!” He changes his mood so quickly, pointing over to your new ride. “This is sick, Y/N,” he wraps his arm over your shoulders and brings you in for a side hug, kissing the top of your head while doing so.

“I know! Now I can actually pick you up after the show and we can maybe come back here after?”

Luke groans again. “Do we have to? She doesn’t even know we’re playing there, yet.”

“I think it would be nice for her to see how good you guys actually are. Maybe she’ll be more supportive after that.” You shrug at him, trying to convince him that she just needs some time to come around.

“Speaking of the devil,” Luke starts, “let’s go somewhere before she gets back,” he coos as she pulls you into his body.

“Don’t you have to do yardwork?”

“I’m basically done,” he bites off his gardening gloves and throws them into the yard.

“Okay, cowboy,” you tease him as you flick his sunhat off of his head and walk off to the driver’s side of the car.

“Don’t let Reggie hear you call me that, he’s been trying to get us to sing country music for forever.”

You laugh at the messy-haired boy beside you, soaking in the moment of the two of you together before he makes it big with Sunset Curve and won’t be able to see you as much anymore.

“You know, I wish you were more comfortable driving so I could hold your hand right now,” he looks over at you, although your eyes are glued to the road ahead of you. You manage to get out a laugh, fighting the temptation to look at his cute face.

Since he can’t hold your hand, he settles for resting his had on your knee. Which, in your opinion, was much better.

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gobbluthbutagirl · 3 years ago

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i know exactly what day it was that i got in the huge fight with justine at work too. tuesday, march 23, 2021. and i remember that because monday and wednesday were my days off that week. and monday was supposed to be the day i finally at the age of 23 earned my drivers license. but my 75+ year old BASTARD of a driving instructor just straight up forgot my test was scheduled for then. so i sat on the porch waiting for him like an IDIOT for OVER an hour. tried to call too and nobody picked up. and then he called that afternoon apologizing and we rescheduled for wednesday. which wasn’t a big deal except that jessica walter died on wednesday so my south carolina drivers license that i still have for some reason has the same date on it as jessica walter’s death certificate and i hate that.

#literally what even was 2021. hell of a year(derogatory)

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leqclerc · 4 years ago

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Akljdfglj your WIP titles are so good already but I'm probably most curious about "by way of honoring the things we both held dear"

This is legit the first WIP (last edit was on September 2, says it all really) I started writing after getting back into the fandom around August, when I was still kind of...idk trying to forge my fandom identity I guess. The fandom landscape had changed and at first I had some trouble adjusting to all the new urls, new drivers, new trends, etc. so I just went back to the things that were familiar to me (Brocedes). This was obviously before I discovered I could get obsessed with two disaster men in red 👀 In typical fashion I wrote the set-up scene and then ran out of steam before I ever got to the “good stuff” lmao.

***

Lewis’s brows knit together. He doesn’t see the point in Toto relaying information he’s already aware of. He feels a pang of annoyance at his boss’s dithering.

“So, what are our options?”

“Nico has agreed to act as our reserve driver for the next few races. Just until Valtteri is cleared.”

Lewis’s heart rate elevates and his mouth dries up.

“He hasn’t raced since 2016,” he points out. It comes out quieter than he’d intended. “Doesn’t that make him ineligible?”

“He can get his license renewed...with the stipulation that he completes the required test before the next race, which he has agreed to do. It was a hard decision, but he knows the team well. The design of the car has changed, but he was always good with the technical side of things.” Toto swallows. “He’s flying out here tomorrow. I’ve made some arrangements to allow him to complete the test on Wednesday, here in Silverstone.”

Right. If any team can make something like this happen within seventy two hours, it’s Mercedes.

“I thought you should hear it first. From me.”

The air rushes out of him and his shoulders slump. Toto might be saying something else, Lewis isn’t sure—everything around him sounds distant and distorted, like his head is underwater. In that moment, it’s like his life is happening is somewhere far away and he’s present but not really a part of it.

#replies #meova101 #fic tag #writing tag #brocedes

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synthcabbit · 3 years ago

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loving how my bfs mom has been like ‘ill help you learn to drive’ after my bf got his permit and she barely fucking has and my bf has his drivers license test wednesday. god im so fucking annoyed i hate these people with every fibre of my being

#they are the laziest and shittiest people i have ever met

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geek-fashionista · 4 years ago

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771

Phew! I feel like I’ve been all over the world.

The other weekend, the Kumasetsu Clan* went on a journey to a neighboring prefecture. We plucked grapes from the vine, the most delicious grapes I’ve ever eaten in my life. They tasted like straight up grape juice from the first bite. Huge, seedless red grapes. Wonderful.

(*The Kumasetsu Clan: the group I traveled to Hokkaido with. Kumasetsu means “to cut through the bear”.)

We loaded the trunk with grapes and drove to Genbikei Gorge, where we were treated quite nicely by a shop owner whose nephew had graduated from our school. Then we took a winding, treacherous road up a mountain to an onsen among the clouds. Like, seriously, the clouds were rolling across the parking lot. A rainbow appeared and its end was in the parking lot a few yards away. It was unreal.

We bathed in a small, sulfurous pool, got rained on, felt wonderful and relaxed. Then we loaded up on snacks and headed back down the mountain. Along the way, we saw wild pigs, stopped at a river, and got rained on a little bit more before we dropped by Ichinoseki for dinner.

It was a nice little day trip, and left me feeling refreshed and ready for the week. And it would have been a normal week... but on Tuesday we got an email that one of the local elementary schools had an outbreak of coronavirus and its students wouldn’t be coming back until next week. That leaves me down four kids in a class with already low attendance. (Not that I mind.)

On Wednesday we had a taco party in the office. My class got observed. Yesterday I passed my driver’s test. Tomorrow there’s no school so I may skip town in search of more train station stamps, and Sunday we’re planning a movie day.

Life is good again. But with driver’s license comes great responsibility, and now that my greatest obstacle to staying has been removed, I have to ask myself... do I stay another year, or do I go home? I’ve got a month to figure it out.

#life #text

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bobasheebaby · 5 years ago

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70 Scrubs Prompts

Yup, another prompt list. Most of these are actually light and funny, though some are a little heavier. I tried to pick ones that would work outside of a hospital setting. Again it’s super long so cutting at 15.

1 “And who’s to say this isn’t what happens? Who can tell me that my fantasies won’t come true? Just this once ... “ — John JD Dorian

2 “Look NAME, I don’t know if it’s possible for me to put how I feel about you into words, but I guess I’ll give it a shot. I never really believed I’d find somebody that I love as much as you. I love you more than anything in the whole world. NAME, I love you more than FRIEND.” “Oh my god” “It's kind of hard for me to say, but it's true.” — John JD Dorian and Elliot Reid

3 “I grew up on the street ... No, not the hood. The Sesame Street.” — John JD Dorian

4 “As I looked at all the relationships around me ... Some that had gone on forever ... some that were reigniting ... and some that had just begun ... I realized something: It should have been me.” — John JD Dorian

5 “NAME, you can’t test love. When I met NAME, it seemed he/she was more in love with his/her best friend than with me.” “Honey, they’ve got that almond biscotti FRIEND loves, so I was wondering if I could borrow some money so I can get him/her some.” “No, you got him/her a present yesterday.” — Carla and Turk

6 “You’ve been wrong so many times that I'm not even going to say something is wrong anymore. I'm going to say that it's 'NAME'.

— Perry Cox

7 “I just took a pregnancy test, just tell me when a minute's up.” “I just put some pizza rolls on the microwave oven; the minute that bad boy rings we're good to go.” “Oh, my god, I can't stand it, 30 more seconds.” “OK baby, don't get too excited, they have to cool off for at least a minute.” — Carla and Turk

8 “So, uh, you going to lunch with your brother/sister?” “Yeah, I... well, you know, I would've invited you, but I already made the reservation for two.” “So call and change it to three.” “Ohh, I'm not gonna mess with that hostess. You know, she uses sharp tones.” — Elliot Reid and John JD Dorian

9 “Nothing in this world, that's worth having comes easy.” — Bob Kelso

10 “Yeah, I'm not that great with kids. They've got such tiny hands. It's creepy.” — Elliot Reid

11 “I love this moment so much, I want to have sex with it.” — Perry Cox

12 “Oh, my God! I'm gagging and vomiting at the same time. I'm... I'm gavomiting!” — Perry Cox

13 “So he/she has a cute butt. Everyone has a cute butt. I have a cute butt.” “You should bring it in someday.” — John JD Dorian & Carla Espinosa

14 “The problem with people who only want what they can’t have is that once they have what they want, they don’t want it anymore.” — John JD Dorian

15 “I guess when you care about someone, you’ll do whatever you can to make ’em happy.” —John JD Dorian

16 “The truth is, it is all your memories, the joyful ones and the heartbreaking ones that make up who you are as a person” — John JD Dorian

17 “‘Cause even if it breaks your heart to be ‘just friends’, if you really care about someone, you’ll take the hit.“ — John JD Dorian

18 “The easiest way to lose something is to want it too badly.” — John JD Dorian

19 “Sometimes in life when you get what you want, you end up missing what you left behind.” — John JD Dorian

20 “Sex is only good for two things. Making babies and revenge.” — Jordan Sullivan

21 “What's going on?” “I love you too dumpling, but I have to work late. I'll make it up to you this weekend.” “NAME’s on the phone with his/her mom/dad/parent, so we're taking five.” — Jordan Sullivan, Ted Buckland and Perry Cox

22 “By the way, NAME’s here but I'm not going to kiss and tell.” “Oh really? Cause I just got your text that said "bone city".” “Oh really? That came through?” — JD and Elliot

23 “You're gonna love it here, sport.” “Get out while you still can.” “Uh...” “Seriously, get out while you still can.” — Bob Kelso, Ted Buckland, and Keith Dudemeister

24 “Ted, what are you doing?” “I like to do stomach crunches after lunch.” “Ted, lunch was four hours ago.” “Yep, I wasted most of my Tuesday.” “It's Wednesday.” “Aw, man! I missed SHOW!” — John JD Dorian and Ted Buckland

25 “Well, it took a whole tube of gel, but I finally got my hair down.” “No one male or female ever cared, NAME.” — Ted Buckland and Perry Cox

26 “Thirsty, huh?” “Helps the tears taste less bitter.” “Cheers.” — John JD Dorian and Ted Buckland

27 “I have to get ready man. I want my date with NAME to be perfect. What do you think about a romantic horseback ride on the beach?” “Ooh, like you and I did for your birthday.” “Yeah but except this time with two horses.” — John JD Dorian and Turk

28 “I am wearing red. Should I not be wearing red around her?” “She's pregnant, she's not a bull.” — Elliot Reid and Turk

29 “This is why the headache didn't go away, it is actually pronounced 'analgesic', not 'ANALgesic'. The pills go into your mouth.” — Turk

30 [She/he sees NAME holding a beer] “What are you doing? [He/she threatens to open it] “You better not open that.” [He/she opens it] “Okay, you better not drink it.” [He/she takes a sip] “All right, You better not enjoy it.” [He/she expresses enjoyment, person A bitch slaps his/her beer] “Did you just bitch slap my beer?” “Are you calling me a bitch?” “Yes. Yes, I am!” — Carla and Turk

31 “Is there another guy on this planet who is that sensitive?” “Okay, let it out. I've got you. NAME has got you. Hold me tighter, a little too tight...There is a good spot.” — Turk and JD

32 person a “This plan is fool proof.” Person c “That is impossible. You two are involved.” Person c “We will see about that!” [Person a and c crash into each other as they try to walk away] — JD, Perry Cox and Turk

33 person a “I don't think we have anymore wine. NAME, can I have some of yours?” [Person C’s narration: I felt like NAME was starting to blame me for all of this.] [person b Spills his/ her wine in person c’s face) “I spilled mine too, honey. You know what you should do? Ask for some NAME’s.” [Person C Spills his/her wine on his/her crotch] “I spilled mine too.” — Carla, Turk and JD

34 “Wait NAME! I have an idea.” “You have another idea? Well I've got to tell you, I'm done with your ideas and not just for now but forever! Okay, are we clear on that?” “It's a good one.” “I'm listening.” — JD and Turk

35 “He/she is not allowed to dream about me. It gets too freaky in there.” “Cirque de Soleil freaky. One time, he/she was skinless.” — Carla and Turk

36 “How often do you make love?” “Twice today.” “Actually it was three times. You were asleep for the last one.” “Wow, that really happened? I thought it was weird that you were in one of my sex dreams.” — Marston, Turk and Carla

37 “How was your first stress-free day?” “Horrible. And you?” “Worse. Let's make a baby. If it doesn't work this time I'll kill myself.” “Not helping with the stress.” — Carla and Turk

38 “Dude, there you are. Two things; First, the aliens are here and they're wearing track suits.” “Oh, that's Nana.” — Turk and JD

39 “Are you nude right now?” “Yeah! How'd you know?” “Your voice is always higher when you're nude.” “That's true.” “It's not weird you know that at all.” —JD, Turk and Perry Cox

40 “You know, I actually like NAME. So, don't do that thing you always do.” “If you're referring to the game "Find the Saltine", relax. I don't even play that with NAME anymore.” [Later] “Behind your ear.” [Withdrawing Saltine from behind his ear] “My friend, you have found the Saltine. Uh, but, don't tell NAME we're still playing.”— Elliot Reid, JD and Turk

41 “Dude, he/she keeps a hug schedule with his/her friends!” “Okay, NAME ... looks like someone's getting crossed off their 2 o' clock spot and getting penciled in for never! How does that feel? Does it sting?” Person B Narration: He's hurting! Hug him/her ... hug him/her now! — Turk and JD

42 “Dude, don't sweat it - It says here that the ostrich is generally a docile creature.” “Thank God!” “It also says their kick can kill a man!” — Turk and JD

43 “Just don't repeat the same mistakes you made with me. For instance, don't speed down the road pretending your brakes are out. I don't care if it got you laid once in high school. It is not funny and I still have not forgiven you for killing that pony.” — Elliot Reid

44 “NAME, I don't photograph well. On my driver's license, I look like Gary Busey.” — Elliot Reid

45 “We have a very complicated past.” “Yeah, I hurt him/her, and I'm not proud.” Person B narration: I'm a little proud. — Elliot and JD

46 “NAME and I keep it superficial.” “Love the superficial. Dynamite teeth today!” “Oh thanks buddy!” “Sparkly.” “Yeah!” — Elliot and JD

47 “Will you tell me what NAME’s fantasy was?” “Nope.” “Did it involve chains?” “No.” “Whips?” “Mm-mm.” “Candle wax?” “No.” “Role-playing?” “No.” “Lasers?” “Mm-mm.” “Hamsters?” “Negative.” “Was he/she a Mexican apple thief?” “If only ...” — JD and Elliot

48 “Why don't you just move into my place?” “Oh, great, then we'll be two losers under one roof.” — Elliot and JD

49 “NAME, what you said before ... I knew you were right. Anyway, I'm sorry I got mad. You were wrong about one thing, though - we are moving forward.” “NAME, I'm thirty years old; I'm single, I'm homeless, and I'm pretty sure I just soiled myself.”

— Elliot and JD

50 Person A “Ohhh, my God, you're right.” Person B “Don't let him/her be your puppet-master.” Person C “Hey!” Person B “Hey.” Person C “What's up?” Person B “I have a headache.” Person C “Take some aspirin.” Person B “Don't tell me what to do! You're not the boss of me!” — Carla, Elliot and Jake

51 “I've never connected with a guy/girl like this before. I mean, even though it's only been two weeks, I already feel like I know NAME better than I know myself.” “What does he/she do for a living?” “I should know that.” — Elliot and Carla

52 “Look, the reason I've been acting so weird and having my friends hang around us all the time is because I really think that we have a shot for something great, and I don't wanna go and ruin it by sleeping with you too fast. I mean, what was I supposed to do?” “Well, you...you could have just told me that.” “Yes, but you're forgetting I'm a crazy person!” — Elliot and Jake

53 “I've seen the Wiggles live in concert ... twice.” “Did they perform 'Big Red Car'?” “They opened and closed the show with it. It was awesome.” — Perry Cox and Turk

54 “What's wrong with me?” “You're an annoying, whining man-child.” “That question wasn't directed to you!” “What question?” — JD and Perry Cox

55 “I’m notifying all my old boyfriends/girlfriends today that I'm officially off the market.” “I'm sure the 'pulse' setting on your shower head will be devastated!” — Elliot Reid and Perry Cox

56 “If there is one thing I have learned, it's that you can't schedule love.” “I think your credit card statement would beg to differ.” — Bob Kelso and Perry Cox

57 “Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to present, Man/Woman Not Caring.” [points to self] — Perry Cox

58 “If you're worried about people seeing your ass, do what all the other girls do and tie a sweater around your waist.” — Perry Cox

59 “Should I talk slower or get a nurse that speaks fluent moron?” — Perry Cox

60 “Do you actually listen to yourself when you speak, or do you find you drift in and out?” — Perry Cox

61 [thinking] Why don't I ever listen to me? — JD

62 “And you know what else? I quit!” “No you don't!” “Well I'm leaving early today!” “No, you're not! You're coming back to my office to do busy work!” “Fine, but I'm getting a soda first!” “Whatever.” — Ted Buckland and Bob Kelso

63 “Your dog is creepy.” “Aww...be nice to Rowdy. The guy we bought him from used to keep him in a box full of old hats.” — Elliot and JD

64 “I thought we cared about each other ...” “Oh please, if you didn't want to sleep with me, you'd have done the same thing.” “Well, I'll tell you one thing, the last thing in the world I wanna do is sleep wit'cha now!” “Do me right here.” “Okay.” “See!” — JD and Elliot

65 “Huh! I put all those fliers up, and nobody wants me to live with them!” “Oh, come on, NAME. I'm sure you'll eventually find a roommate who's a... clean, non-smoking vegetarian that rinses the shower thoroughly after each usage.” “Oh, well, if you don't, it gets mildewy.” “You know, you should move in with my friend: Anal McLooney.” — Elliot and JD

66 “You know, I've been thinking a lot about us lately.” “Me too.” “God, you drive me crazy.” “Oh, you drive me crazy!” “Sometimes I just lay awake at night, thinking about how unbelievably lucky I am to have you in my life.” “Sometimes you're so controlling it makes me want to strangle you..” — Paul and Elliot

67 “Tonight, I am going to make all of your fantasies come true.” “You know, NAME, I would be happy just to have sex above the covers once.” “Yeah ... never gonna happen.” — Elliot and Paul

68 “You know, it's funny... when I said "I love you," it was an accident - and I never really loved you at all.” “That is an absolute riot.” — Elliot and Paul

69 “Okay, here's what you do: First you say that, even though our relationship is ending, you don't have any regrets.” “Oh, my God! Are you actually telling me how to break up with you?” “You're right. Go ahead.” “If you could just start me off, that'd be super.” — Paul and Elliot

70 Person A “You never explained that U2 thing, did you!” Person B “You know, I've been thinking about it, and maybe it's not such a bad thing that that happened! Right? I mean, things have been going really well between us, and maybe it was fate! I could've been looking at my Bel Biv Devoe CD and said, "I love Bel Biv Devoe" - which I do, by the way. And I'm not ashamed of it.” Person A and B “That girl is poison..." Person A “NAME, look, I just think that if you guys are meant to get to this point, it'll happen... naturally.” Person B “You're right! "I love U2!" Dammit! Why do I always have to say every little thing that comes into my head!? Ugh, I really wish you wouldn't stand so close to me after you take your hummus break. See! I didn't need to say that! I'm gonna tell him.” Person C “Love you!” Person B “Love you more!” Person A “Ugh!” Person B “You know what - brush your teeth, then judge me!” — Carla, Elliot and Paul

#scrubs prompts #dialogue prompts #writing prompts #drabble prompts #scrubs quotes #john jd dorian #christopher turk #carla espinosa #perry cox #bob kelso #ted buckland #elliot reid #long post

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papermoonloveslucy · 4 years ago

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REMINISCING

July 1, 1949

“Reminiscing” is episode #51 of the CBS Radio series MY FAVORITE HUSBAND broadcast on July 1, 1949.

Synopsis ~ Liz is working on her scrapbook, and she and George reminisce about when Liz learned to drive and got her license, when Liz signed an affidavit swearing never to interrupt George's stories again, and when the butcher thought that Liz had a crush on him.

REGULAR CAST

Lucille Ball (Liz Cooper) was born on August 6, 1911 in Jamestown, New York. She began her screen career in 1933 and was known in Hollywood as ‘Queen of the B’s’ due to her many appearances in ‘B’ movies. With Richard Denning, she starred in a radio program titled “My Favorite Husband” which eventually led to the creation of “I Love Lucy,” a television situation comedy in which she co-starred with her real-life husband, Latin bandleader Desi Arnaz. The program was phenomenally successful, allowing the couple to purchase what was once RKO Studios, re-naming it Desilu. When the show ended in 1960 (in an hour-long format known as “The Lucy-Desi Comedy Hour”) so did Lucy and Desi’s marriage. In 1962, hoping to keep Desilu financially solvent, Lucy returned to the sitcom format with “The Lucy Show,” which lasted six seasons. She followed that with a similar sitcom “Here’s Lucy” co-starring with her real-life children, Lucie and Desi Jr., as well as Gale Gordon, who had joined the cast of “The Lucy Show” during season two. Before her death in 1989, Lucy made one more attempt at a sitcom with “Life With Lucy,” also with Gordon.

Richard Denning (George Cooper) was born as Louis Albert Heindrich Denninger Jr., in Poughkeepsie, New York. When he was 18 months old, his family moved to Los Angeles. Plans called for him to take over his father's garment manufacturing business, but he developed an interest in acting. Denning enlisted in the US Navy during World War II. He is best known for his roles in various science fiction and horror films of the 1950s. Although he teamed with Lucille Ball on radio in “My Favorite Husband,” the two never acted together on screen. While “I Love Lucy” was on the air, he was seen on another CBS TV series, “Mr. & Mrs. North.” From 1968 to 1980 he played the Governor on “Hawaii 5-0″, his final role. He died in 1998 at age 84.

Gale Gordon (Rudolph Atterbury) had worked with Lucille Ball on “The Wonder Show” on radio in 1938. One of the front-runners to play Fred Mertz on “I Love Lucy,” he eventually played Alvin Littlefield, owner of the Tropicana, during two episodes in 1952. After playing a Judge in an episode of “The Lucy-Desi Comedy Hour” in 1958, he would re-team with Lucy for all of her subsequent series’: as Theodore J. Mooney in ”The Lucy Show”; as Harrison Otis Carter in “Here’s Lucy”; and as Curtis McGibbon on "Life with Lucy.” Gordon died in 1995 at the age of 89.

Bea Benadaret (Iris Atterbury) was considered the front-runner to be cast as Ethel Mertz but when “I Love Lucy” was ready to start production she was already playing a similar role on TV’s “The George Burns and Gracie Allen Show” so Vivian Vance was cast instead. On “I Love Lucy” she was cast as Lucy Ricarodo’s spinster neighbor, Miss Lewis, in “Lucy Plays Cupid” (ILL S1;E15) in early 1952. Later, she was a success in her own show, “Petticoat Junction” as Shady Rest Hotel proprietress Kate Bradley. She starred in the series until her death in 1968.

Ruth Perrott (Katie, the Maid) was also later seen on “I Love Lucy.” She first played Mrs. Pomerantz, a member of the surprise investigating committee for the Society Matrons League in “Pioneer Women” (ILL S1;E25), as one of the member of the Wednesday Afternoon Fine Arts League in “Lucy and Ethel Buy the Same Dress” (ILL S3;E3), and also played a nurse when “Lucy Goes to the Hospital” (ILL S2;E16). She died in 1996 at the age of 96.

Bob LeMond (Announcer) also served as the announcer for the pilot episode of “I Love Lucy”. When the long-lost pilot was finally discovered in 1990, a few moments of the opening narration were damaged and lost, so LeMond – fifty years later – recreated the narration for the CBS special and subsequent DVD release.

GUEST CAST

Frank Nelson (Motor Vehicles Clerk) was born on May 6, 1911 (three months before Lucille Ball) in Colorado Springs, Colorado. He started working as a radio announcer at the age of 15. He later appeared on such popular radio shows as “The Great Gildersleeve,” “Burns and Allen,” and “Fibber McGee & Molly”. This is one of his 11 performances on “My Favorite Husband.” On “I Love Lucy” he holds the distinction of being the only actor to play two recurring roles: Freddie Fillmore and Ralph Ramsey, as well as six one-off characters, including the frazzled train conductor in “The Great Train Robbery” (ILL S5;E5), a character he repeated on “The Lucy Show.” Aside from Lucille Ball, Nelson is perhaps most associated with Jack Benny and was a fifteen-year regular on his radio and television programs.

Hans Conried (Mr. Dabney, the Butcher) first co-starred with Lucille Ball in The Big Street (1942). He then appeared on “I Love Lucy” as used furniture man Dan Jenkins in “Redecorating” (ILL S2;E8) and later that same season as Percy Livermore in “Lucy Hires an English Tutor” (ILL S2;E13) – both in 1952. The following year he began an association with Disney by voicing Captain Hook in Peter Pan. On “The Lucy Show” he played Professor Gitterman in “Lucy’s Barbershop Quartet” (TLS S1;E19) and in “Lucy Plays Cleopatra” (TLS S2;E1). He was probably best known as Uncle Tonoose on “Make Room for Daddy” starring Danny Thomas, which was filmed on the Desilu lot. He joined Thomas on a season 6 episode of “Here’s Lucy” in 1973.

“My Favorite Husband” was based on the novels Mr. and Mrs. Cugat, the Record of a Happy Marriage (1940) and Outside Eden (1945) by Isabel Scott Rorick, which had previously been adapted into the film Are Husbands Necessary? (1942). “My Favorite Husband” was first broadcast as a one-time special on July 5, 1948. Lucille Ball and Lee Bowman played the characters of Liz and George Cugat, and a positive response to this broadcast convinced CBS to launch “My Favorite Husband” as a series. When Bowman was not available Richard Denning was cast as George. On January 7, 1949, confusion with bandleader Xavier Cugat prompted a name change to Cooper. On this same episode Jell-O became its sponsor. A total of 124 episodes of the program aired from July 23, 1948 through March 31, 1951. After about ten episodes had been written, writers Fox and Davenport departed and three new writers took over – Bob Carroll, Jr., Madelyn Pugh, and head writer/producer Jess Oppenheimer. In March 1949 Gale Gordon took over the existing role of George's boss, Rudolph Atterbury, and Bea Benaderet was added as his wife, Iris. CBS brought “My Favorite Husband” to television in 1953, starring Joan Caulfield and Barry Nelson as Liz and George Cooper. The television version ran two-and-a-half seasons, from September 1953 through December 1955, on air concurrently with “I Love Lucy.” It was produced live at CBS Television City for most of its run, until switching to film for a truncated third season filmed (ironically) at Desilu and recasting Liz Cooper with Vanessa Brown. In addition to being aired on the CBS Radio Network, the episodes were heard on the Armed Forces Radio Network, where the commercials were omitted.

This is the final episode of Season One of MY FAVORITE HUSBAND.

An audio excerpt from this episode was included on the CD that came with the book Laughs, Luck...and Lucy by Jess Oppenheimer.

THE EPISODE

The episode opens with Liz spread out on the living room floor scrap-booking. George reminds her they are supposed to go to the movies and he hates to miss the first three minutes. Liz says that it doesn’t matter because:

LIZ: “It’s always the same: MGM presents... (roars like a lion).”

Liz is referring to the Metro Goldwyn Mayer logo, a lion with his head through a celluloid ribbon that reads ‘Ars Gratia Artis’ (art for arts sake). The lion - named Leo, naturally - roared and the motion picture began.

In 1954, Lucy and Desi began a business relationship with MGM, making several motion pictures for them and even having Ricky Ricardo work for the studio on "I Love Lucy”.

Liz finds a picture of their car - before she got into an accident and wrecked it! She ran it into a house! Flashback to George teaching Liz to drive.

The script for the reminiscence is nearly identical to the scene in “Liz Learns To Drive” aka “Driving Lessons” aka “Learning To Drive” in episode #18 on November 13, 1948, from when the characters were known as the Cugats. This is not a ‘clip’ from that episode, but a recreation of it, including guest actor Frank Nelson as the Motor Vehicles Clerk.

Their new Hudson has a starter button - not a key. Liz mistakes the cigarette lighter and the radio dial for the starter button. Naturally, she has difficulty with the clutch. Everything goes smoothly - if Liz can just remember to drive on the right side of the road! A near traffic accident scares George, but only makes Liz angry at the other driver. George has Liz stop at the Motor Vehicle Department to get her license.

On “I Love Lucy,” Ricky taught Lucy how to drive with some of the same communication problems. Most of the dramatic moments during the lesson happen off-screen. Over-confident Lucy then feels she can teach Ethel to drive, too!

The Motor Vehicles Clerk (Frank Nelson) takes Liz’s application.

CLERK: “Race?” LIZ: “Of course not. I don’t even have a license yet.”

On the application Liz gives her address as 321 Bundy, her age as 21 (!), her weight as 118lbs, blue eyes...

LIZ: “And my hair is red.” CLERK: “Naturally.” LIZ: “Well, just a henna rinse now and then.”

He then gives Liz and eye test.

CLERK: “Read those letters on the wall over there.” LIZ: “M.E.N.”

On “Here’s Lucy” Lucy Carter took her son Craig to get his license. Mrs. Carter also faced impatient clerks and a hair-raising driver’s test.

Back in the present, Liz finds a recipe for making Jell-O, which cues a commercial for their sponsor. Bob LeMond ties in the upcoming Independence Day holiday with a Jell-O raspberry pie recipe. “Back to the Coopers...” Two hours later, the Coopers still haven’t left for the movie. Still going through the scrapbook pile of photos and papers, Liz finds an affidavit.

“I, Liz Cooper, solemnly swear I will not interrupt my husband’s stories, even if I’ve heard them a hundred times.”

Flashback to the night George made Liz sign the affidavit. This scene is from “Old Jokes and Old Stories” episode #37 on March 25, 1949. As with the previous reminiscence, it is not a clip, but a recreation with minor textural alterations.

The Atterburys are over for dinner, and George is once again monopolizing the conversation with his funny but familiar old stories.

LIZ (to Katie): “One person snickers and George thinks his last name is Jessel.”

George Albert ‘Georgie’ Jessel (1898-1981) was famous as a multi-talented entertainer widely known by his nickname, the "Toastmaster General of the United States," due to his frequent role as the master of ceremonies at political and entertainment gatherings. In 1948, he was honored by the Friars Club, of which he was’ the Abbot’ in a ceremony that was later turned into a short newsreel film.

George launches into a story about their Honeymoon. Everyone has heard it so he tries to tell the story of a picnic, but Liz keeps interrupting and correcting his recollections.

Some of the same dialogue will be recycled on “I Love Lucy” in “Equal Rights” (ILL S3;E4), first aired on October 24, 1953. The rest of the TV episode was based on another episode of “My Favorite Husband” titled “Women’s Rights, Part I” aired on March 5, 1950.

GEORGE / RICKY: “We got there about 10 o’clock.” LIZ / LUCY: “It was twelve o’clock.” GEORGE / RICKY: “What’s the difference?” RUDOLPH / FRED: “Two hours.”

Back to the present time, with Liz and George still pawing through the scrap book materials. Liz discovers an old Valentine from George. Flashback to a Valentine’s Day past...

This final reminiscence is based on “Valentine’s Day” aka “Valentine’s Day Mischief” broadcast on February 11, 1949. As with the previous two flashbacks, this is not a clip, but a recreation of the script, including using the original cast, Hans Conried, as Mr. Dabney.

Liz screams “I love you, George” at the top of her voice to prove her affection for him. Liz discovers that Katie has a boyfriend. She has written Mr. Dabney the butcher a romantic poem. Liz calls him “old heavy thumbs”.

KATIE: “Some people may have better beef, but his liver’s good. And no one has oxtail and pig’s feet like him!”

Katie is embarrassed to give the Valentine poem to him, so she asks Liz to do it. Mr. Dabney (Hans Conried) arrives with a delivery from ‘Dabney’s: The Home of Happy Ham Hocks!’ Naturally, Mr. Dabney thinks Liz is the one who has a crush on him, not Katie.

The situation will be used again in “Lucy Plays Cupid” (ILL S1;E15) first aired on January 21, 1952. On TV, the butcher is named Mr. Ritter and he is played by Edward Everett Horton (above). The one who has a crush on him (since the Ricardos do not have a maid) is Miss Lewis, played by (ironically) Bea Benadaret, who plays Iris Atterbury in this episode of “My Favorite Husband.”

Katie’s Valentine is scented!

MR. DABNEY: “And how did you know my favorite aroma - Swift Premium!”

Mr. Dabney reads the poem aloud:

“If you be mine, then I’ll be thine And set your heart a-quiver. Say you’ll be my Valentine And bring two pounds of liver!

The poem is signed “Your bashful redhead”. We learn that Katie also has red hair!

MR. DABNEY: “Listen, two houses may have red roofs, but you don’t pick the one with saggin' foundation!”

Back in the living room in the present time, Liz and George realize they have missed the movie - it is two in the morning! The Coopers hug and kiss.

LIZ: “Honey, you’re my favorite husband!”

The episode ends, but Lucille Ball returns for a Jell-O commercial with announcer Bob LeMond. They sing “Row Row Your Boat” with Jell-O lyrics! The big finish,

“J.E.L.L.O, now you’re on the ball. Jell-O is wonderful, sponsors are marvelous, We’ll see you next fall!”

Lucy interrupts Bob to say a special thank you to director Jess Oppenheimer, as well as thanking the entire cast and crew by name. Lucy reminds the listeners they will all be back on the second of September. Bob adds that audiences should see Lucille Ball in Sorrowful Jones with Bob Hope.

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nickgerlich · 5 years ago

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What’s Your Vector, Victor?

By now we have all heard the command: Stay home. Some states are more lax than others, while at the opposite end, merely being in public runs the risk of arrest or hefty fines. Regardless, though, citizens are still allowed to shop for essentials, because we still have to eat.

The only problem is that the supermarket may be one of the dirtiest places around, and may be helping make matters worse instead of better by being the vector through which the virus travels.

Sheltering-in-place has not exactly been a rousing success in the US, because every city and state with some kind of warning, ranging from strong suggestion to curfews and controls, left open the option of shopping for our groceries. And whether we go to market because we truly need foodstuffs, or we are just bored completely to death, officials have unwittingly funneled all of American humanity to our local supermarkets. Since the grocery is often about the only thing remaining open these days, they tend to be crowded with people, all of whom are busily ignoring pleas not to gather in groups of ten or more.

Good luck finding sanitizing wipes now at Walmart, Target, and elsewhere when you walk in. Those days are over. The carts are filthy, and were they to be subjected to a simple black light test or more, it would show them to be four-wheeled trolleys of death. Bring your own gloves and disinfectants, or throw caution to the wind. God knows how many people have used that cart in the last 72 hours, which is about how long the COVID-19 virus can linger on plastic.

Then consider that the air you breathe is likely filled with gravity-defying microscopic killer zombies, and every single product you touch is a potential cesspool of germs. Suddenly you realize that you probably should have worn a HAZMAT suit and respirator, provided you could find such fashion statements these days.

So what’s a supermarket to do? Can they possibly disinfect the store every night during their closing hours? Doubtful flight of fantasy. Or should they be making it even harder to deal with this mess by limiting the number of people who can be inside at any one time?

Absolutely.

In a 200,000 square foot Walmart Supercenter, limiting entry to 100 persons at a time means one person for every 2000 square feet. Upping it to even 500 persons gives us 400 square feet per person, enough to keep our six feet of linear distance, at least on paper.

But this is what it’s coming down to. Home Depots in Florida have begun this practice. A few days ago, my brother in the Tampa area reported having to wait 45 sweltering minutes outside in a queue delineated into six-foot segments, while store employees only allowed five people at a time into the massive DIY store. Now never mind why in the hell my brother was at Home Depot in the first place, because there is definitely nothing essential there for him unless his freaking toilet had broken. I think he was just bored, and his sudden time off has turned into a good time to catch up on projects.

Nice try. Not buying. He unwittingly put himself at risk from infected carriers. And who knows, he may even be a carrier himself. Painting the guest bedroom can wait.

I’m all for Walmart and everyone else implementing a store occupation policy, though. When I went shopping this last Wednesday, I purposely went after the lunch hour, when I thought traffic would be bottoming. I was right, although there will still people there. I got in and out as quickly as possible. And come Tuesday when I forecast we will need more perishables, I will be at Walmart at 6:00am, ready to show my ID for the seniors-only hour.

Oh. My. God. I can’t believe I just said that. But hey, I’m 61, and I’m going to take advantage of it now. I may be 61-going-on-41 inside my head, but on my Texas Drivers License, I am an old timer. Watch out, you geezers. Let the power shopping begin.

With gloves, no less.

I am operating under the assumption that what is likely the only type of store I can realistically enter in the Amarillo area is basically Ground Zero for COVID-19, if there is such a thing in our remote corner of the state. I may as well lick the shopping cart handle, because that’s probably not a whole lot different from wandering the aisles and rubbing shoulders with others.

And then I will go home to bathe in hot water. Scrub my hands. Wash that virus right out of my hair. Oh, and spray, scrub, and hose my purchases before I put them away.

Because it’s about the only thing we can do to increase our chances of not being the next statistic. I’ll race you for a cart next Tuesday. Winner take all.

Dr “Get Your Hands Off My Cauliflower“ Gerlich

Audio Blog

#marketing #coronavirus #COVID-19 #supermarkets

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littlemissmeggie · 5 years ago

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@xoxosoulshine replied to your post “so i had an MRI last week and they found a lesion on my brain”

@littlemissmeggie oh no!!! That's is terrible! I dont know the situation really but I wish I could throat punch your old doctor!! I hate that for you!! Xoxo.

ok i know you didn’t ask for this but everything that’s been happening lately has seemed so ridiculous that i just have to write it out.

i started having seizures when i was 15. my mom found a neurologist at yale-new haven hospital—i’m not sure how she found him because i don’t really remember much from that time period—and we drove down to yale to meet with dr. mcveety. after several appointments and a few tests—an MRI, a CT scan, and a sleep-deprived EEG—he diagnosed me with generalized idiopathic epilepsy and had me on the first anti-epileptic drug of many. (we were told nothing unusual showed on any of the tests.) things seemed to be fairly well controlled and i saw him six months after the diagnosis for a check-up.

after a year and a half with him, he must have thought everything was fine and i wasn’t really worth his time anymore because he pawned me off on his wife, his practice’s physician assistant. i didn’t really like beth from the start—she was cold and didn’t really seem to listen to my answers to her questions or take my concerns seriously—but after i started having focal onset aware seizures, i really didn’t like her. i’d researched online because i had no idea what was happening and when i told her that i thought i was having focal aware seizures, she told me that she hated when patients self-diagnosed and that i was making it up. after a few appointments and many more focal aware seizures, my mom insisted we see a different doctor. (i will never forget that day. my mom had a fit in the office, told beth she was a bitch, demanded to dr. mcveety’s face that we have a “real” doctor, and told him that beth wasn’t even qualified but just had the job because she was his wife.)

so i ended up with dr. cretella. things started off fine with her. she did at least believe me and changed my medication to one that controlled both tonic-clonic and focal onset aware seizures. i went back to see her every year for check-ups and a few times after significant break-through seizures. when i was finally able to get my license (in connecticut, you have to go six months without a seizure before you can get your drivers license.), i had to have her fill out a paper for the DMV stating that i had gone more than six months without a seizure; when i called the office to ask that the form be submitted, she seemed confused, like she wasn’t really sure what i was asking for, which i thought was odd.

after an evening in july 2014 during which i had no less than six seizures and totalled my car, i went for a visit and dr. cretella changed my medicine. and seemed surprised to learn that i drove.

after that, i started seeing her every two years. i often wondered why she never ran any tests to see if anything had changed, if everything was okay; she never ordered bloodwork, MRIs, EEGs, or CT scans. after the car accident, the hospital i was brought to ran a CT scan but i don’t think she ever even got the results and looked them over. i’ve also wondered why they only tried a sleep-deprived EEG once. when i first started having seizures, they were always when i was asleep. the point of the sleep-deprived EEG was that i would stay awake for 48 hours and then once i was wired, i would fall asleep and have a seizure and they could see my brain activity during a seizure. but i didn’t have a seizure, they didn’t do anything to induce one, and they never tried it again.

then this little bit of fuckery happened.

i saw a primary care physician who ordered bloodwork, an MRI, and sent a referral to a new neurology practice. i went for the MRI last wednesday and learnt yesterday that they found a lesion on my frontal lobe on the superior frontal gyrus.

after googling a bit yesterday, my boyfriend and i think it’s entirely possible that the lesion has been there the whole time and i was incorrectly diagnosed with generalized epilepsy when i should have been diagnosed with frontal lobe epilepsy; reading about FLE sounds a lot like reading about my life. my boyfriend asked me if i ever had night terrors when i was a kid because he’d read that often people think their child is having a night terror when it’s actually a type of frontal lobe seizure. i told him that my mother told dr. mcveety at our first appointment that i had night terrors all the time when i was a kid; mcveety hadn’t seemed too interested in that.

so tl;dr i’ve been with a shitty neurological practice since i started having seizures seventeen years ago. i’m finally going to a new practice and having tests run that should have been run regularly but never were. my new primary care doctor has found a lesion on my brain that i wouldn’t be surprised to learn has been there for 17+ years. i’m waiting to see my new neurologist on monday to see what she thinks and honestly, i’m just hoping that my last practice is as fucking shitty as i’m giving them credit for being and that it’s not a tumor or something.

#xoxosoulshine #meggie talks #i'm sorry this is so long #everything has just been really weird lately #and i'm a little nervous #actually epileptic #MRI

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phroyd · 5 years ago

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Agents with the Federal Bureau of Investigation and Immigration and Customs Enforcement have turned state driver’s license databases into a facial-recognition gold mine, scanning through millions of Americans’ photos without their knowledge or consent, newly released documents show.

Thousands of facial-recognition requests, internal documents and emails over the past five years, obtained through public-records requests by Georgetown Law researchers and provided to The Washington Post, reveal that federal investigators have turned state Department of Motor Vehicles databases into the bedrock of an unprecedented surveillance infrastructure.

Police have long had access to fingerprints, DNA and other “biometric data” taken from criminal suspects. But the DMV records contain the photos of a vast majority of a state’s residents, most of whom have never been charged with a crime.

Neither Congress nor state legislatures have authorized the development of such a system, and growing numbers of Democratic and Republican lawmakers are criticizing the technology as a dangerous, pervasive and error-prone surveillance tool.

“Law enforcement’s access of state databases,” particularly DMV databases, is “often done in the shadows with no consent,” House Oversight Committee Chairman Elijah E. Cummings (D-Md.) said in a statement to The Post.

Rep. Jim Jordan (Ohio), the House Oversight Committee’s ranking Republican, seemed particularly incensed during a hearing into the technology last month at the use of driver’s license photos in federal facial-recognition searches without the approval of state legislators or individual license holders.

“They’ve just given access to that to the FBI,” he said. “No individual signed off on that when they renewed their driver’s license, got their driver’s licenses. They didn’t sign any waiver saying, ‘Oh, it’s okay to turn my information, my photo, over to the FBI.’ No elected officials voted for that to happen.”

Despite those doubts, federal investigators have turned facial recognition into a routine investigative tool. Since 2011, the FBI has logged more than 390,000 facial-recognition searches of federal and local databases, including state DMV databases, the Government Accountability Office said last month, and the records show that federal investigators have forged daily working relationships with DMV officials. In Utah, FBI and ICE agents logged more than 1,000 facial-recognition searches between 2015 and 2017, the records show. Names and other details are hidden, though dozens of the searches are marked as having returned a “possible match.”

San Francisco and Somerville, Mass., have banned their police and public agencies from using facial-recognition software, citing concerns about governmental overreach and a breach of public trust, and the subject is being hotly debated in Washington. On Wednesday, officials with the Transportation Security Administration, Customs and Border Protection and the Secret Service are expected to testify at a hearing of the House Committee on Homeland Security about their agencies’ use of the technology.

The records show the technology already is tightly woven into the fabric of modern law enforcement. They detailed the regular use of facial recognition to track down suspects in low-level crimes, including cashing a stolen check and petty theft. And searches are often executed with nothing more formal than an email from a federal agent to a local contact, the records show.

“It’s really a surveillance-first, ask-permission-later system,” said Jake Laperruque, a senior counsel at the watchdog group Project on Government Oversight. “People think this is something coming way off in the future, but these [facial-recognition] searches are happening very frequently today. The FBI alone does 4,000 searches every month, and a lot of them go through state DMVs.”

The records also underscore the conflicts between the laws of some states and the federal push to find and deport undocumented immigrants. Though Utah, Vermont and Washington allow undocumented immigrants to obtain full driver’s licenses or more-limited permits known as driving privilege cards, ICE agents have run facial-recognition searches on those DMV databases.

More than a dozen states, including New York, as well as the District of Columbia, allow undocumented immigrants to drive legally with full licenses or driving privilege cards, as long as they submit proof of in-state residency and pass the states’ driving-proficiency tests.

Lawmakers in Florida, Texas and other states have introduced bills this year that would extend driving privileges to undocumented immigrants. Some of those states already allow the FBI to scan driver’s license photos, while others, such as Florida and New York, are negotiating with the FBI over access, according to the GAO.

“The state has told [undocumented immigrants], has encouraged them, to submit that information. To me, it’s an insane breach of trust to then turn around and allow ICE access to that,” said Clare Garvie, a senior associate with Georgetown Law’s Center on Privacy and Technology, who led the research.

An ICE spokesman declined to answer questions about how the agency uses facial-recognition searches, saying its “investigative techniques are generally considered law-enforcement sensitive.”

Asked to comment, the FBI referred The Post to the congressional testimony last month of Deputy Assistant Director Kimberly Del Greco, who said that facial-recognition technology was critical “to preserve our nation’s freedoms, ensure our liberties are protected, and preserve our security.” The agency has said in the past that while facial-recognition searches can provide helpful leads, agents are expected to verify the findings and secure definitive proof before pursuing arrests or criminal charges.

Twenty-one states, including Texas and Pennsylvania, plus the District of Columbia, allow federal agencies such as the FBI to scan driver’s license photos, GAO records show. The agreements stipulate some rules for the searches, including that each must be relevant to a criminal investigation.

The FBI’s facial-recognition search has access to local, state and federal databases containing more than 641 million face photos, a GAO director said last month. But the agency provides little information about when the searches are used, who is targeted and how often searches return false matches.

The FBI said its system is 86 percent accurate at finding the right person if a search is able to generate a list of 50 possible matches, according to the GAO. But the FBI has not tested its system’s accuracy under conditions that are closer to normal, such as when a facial search returns only a few possible matches.

Civil rights advocates have said the inaccuracies of facial recognition pose a heightened danger of misidentification and false arrests. The software’s precision is highly dependent on a number of factors, including the lighting of a subject’s face and the quality of the image, and research has shown that the technology performs less accurately on people with darker skin.

“The public doesn’t have a way of controlling what information the government has on them,” said Jacinta González, a senior organizer for the advocacy group Mijente who was particularly concerned about how ICE and other agencies could use the scans to track down immigrants. “And now there’s this rapidly advancing technology, with very few guidelines and protections for people, putting all of this information at their fingertips in a very scary way.”

The records, which include thousands of emails and official documents from federal agencies, as well as Utah, Vermont and Washington state, show how easy it is for a federal investigator to tap into an individual state DMV’s database. While some of the driver photo searches were made on the strength of federal subpoenas or court orders, many requests for searches involved nothing more than an email to a DMV official with the target’s “probe photo” attached. The official would then search the driver’s license database and provide details of any possible matches.

The search capability was offered not just to help identify criminal suspects, but also to detect possible witnesses, victims, bodies, and innocent bystanders and other people not charged with crimes.

Utah’s DMV database was the subject of nearly 2,000 facial-recognition searches from outside law enforcement agencies between 2015 and 2017 — sometimes dozens of searches a day, the records show. One document from Utah’s Statewide Information & Analysis Center coached officers on how to make facial-recognition requests; offered four tips for better facial photographs (“lighting, distance, angle, eyes”); and said the database included “over 5 million Utah driver’s license & state identification card photos,” about 2 million more than the state’s population. State officials did not respond to requests for comment.

Many of the requests for searches in Utah came from local police forces across the country seeking to find suspects who may have traveled to the state, but roughly half the searches came from federal agents, according to a log of the searches. The records do not provide suspect names or say whether cases ended in arrests or convictions.

Washington state’s Department of Licensing said that its “facial recognition system is designed to be an accurate, non-obtrusive fraud detection tool” and that the agency does not share use of the system with law enforcement unless compelled by a court order.

Vermont officials said they stopped using facial-recognition software in 2017. That year, a local chapter of the American Civil Liberties Union revealed records showing that the state DMV had been conducting the searches in violation of a state law that banned technology involving “the use of biometric identifiers.” The state’s governor and attorney general came out against the face-scanning software, citing a need to balance public safety with residents’ privacy rights.

In the years before the ban, the records show, Vermont officials ran a number of face scans on driver’s license photos at the request of ICE agents. Investigators from a number of federal and local agencies emailed the state’s DMV with facial-recognition search requests as they pursued people accused of overstaying their visas, providing false information, stealing from stores or, in at least one case, being part of a “suspicious circumstance.”

The officers in some emails would provide descriptions of their targets: One was dubbed a “gypsy … scamming elderly people for money,” while another was said to have “VERY LARGE PROTRUDING EARS.” In others, DMV officials talked about the face-scanning tool as if it were the kind of awe-inspiring technical marvel most often seen on prime-time cop shows.

In one 2014 email, a police officer in the town of Manchester, Vt., asked a DMV official to scan for a man caught on video “brazenly” stealing. The official forwarded the email to a colleague with a made-for-TV flourish, writing, “Can we play NCIS for this officer?”

Phroyd

#surveillance #facial recogniton #dmv

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