#got high and created new dennis angst

[charmac]

That episode of Family Fight canonically aired on National TV. Dennis named Paddy's Pub in the episode and then had a breakdown and they aired it. People watched some weird, pathetic man have a breakdown on live television, and he had plugged the bar he owns.

People probably showed up to Paddy's for the joke.

His breakdown probably got clipped and reposted. That probably got millions of views on 2015 Youtube, where one of the top comments was the name and address of Paddy's Pub in Philadelphia.

For months, maybe years, random people probably showed up to Paddy's just because they watched the owner crawl up into a ball and cry in a viral video.

'Pathetic man crying on floor' in probably a meme in their universe. People know Dennis Reynolds as that guy. More people know 'pathetic man crying on floor' than know Dennis.

[use-your-imagination98]

If I was writing HSMTMTS S3

So, we know the drama kids go to theater camp:

Have the theater camp be run by Ashlyn and EJ’s grandmother: Penny Caswell  

This would lead to Caswell Family Drama

which would lead to introducing the grandfather: George Caswell 

We already know that George and Penny met at Duke. George was going to be a lawyer and Penny was studying theater. Penny got pregnant her senior year with Cash. She lost her chance at being a Broadway star to stay home and raise Cash (and eventually Dennis)

George bought the camp for Penny to shut up her complaints that he got to be this big shot lawyer and she never got to follow her dreams. George doesn’t understand/like musicals/theater.

George is close with Ashlyn, while Penny is close with EJ. Penny doesn’t mind that EJ is still exploring life, while George is furious that EJ isn’t going to Duke. Penny internally sees a lot of herself in Ashlyn and therefore pushes her extremely hard.

When Ash and EJ introduce Gina and Big Red, it’s Big Red who Penny doesn’t like. She thinks he is below Ashlyn’s standards and spends all summer trying to set Ashlyn up with another boy at the camp who has huge dreams. 

Gina, for the first time in her life, is settled and happy. She helps EJ discover what he wants in life and helps EJ and Ashlyn with their family troubles.

Enter Ricky... He brings Lily along with him to summer theater camp. Lily puts on a fake front, but Gina senses that she is being fake. 

Soon, an instagram account is created and begins bullying the East High Drama kids: Putting a pig’s nose on a pic of Ashlyn, a DUNCE cap on a pic of Seb, etc. One picture is revealed during each episode starting with 2 and ending with 7/8. All these pictures were taken at camp. So, the instagram has to be run by someone there. Gina, Kourtney, Big Red, and Carlos are the loudest voices telling Ricky that its Lily. But Ricky continues to defend her. 

Gina call out Lily at one of the campfire sing-a-longs and Lily acts all dumb and hurt. Ricky and Gina argue (#Rina angst). Big Red breaks them apart and pulls Ricky aside. Red tries to reason with Ricky and explain why everyone thinks its Lily. Ricky blows up at Red and complains that the reason he’s team Lily is because ever since Big Red started dating Ashlyn, he’s changed and doesn’t have time for Ricky. Big Red goes off (#Redky angst)

Howie, seeing how Lily’s lies are pulling the friend group apart, pulls Kourtney aside and admits Lily stole the harness and he knew about it. Kourtney fumes. Breaks up with Howie and we get a girl bonding moment with her and Gina and Ashlyn. Kourtney shifts focus on making costumes for the camp’s summer musicale. Her costume prowess impresses Penny and Penny offers Kourtney a job at Caswell Camp anytime she would like one and writes her a letter of recommendation to Kourtney’s top college. 

After Lily posted the Seb picture with a DUNCE cap on him, Seb confides in Carlos that he is dyslexic and learning is hard for him and when people put him down or call him stupid, it really hurts. Carlos decides that he comes from money and decides (with Seb’s permission) to hire Seb an amazing tutor to help him with school.

So, to recap: Ricky is fighting with EVERYONE, EJ is fighting with his grandpa, Ashlyn with her grandma, EVERYONE but Lily is mad at Ricky, Howie and Kourtney are on the outs but Queen Kourtney is thriving elsewhere.

As for Miss Jenn and Mr. Mazzara, Mr. M took the California Job and Miss Jenn is trying to make it work with Mike, but with every passing day she regrets it. She talks to Penny about her troubles. Penny explains her story with George and Miss Jenn realizes she wants Mr. Mazzara, that she is forcing herself to work in Mike’s life, but her and Ben just click. 

CUTE COUPLE MOMENTS:

3x05: It’s the 4th of July and this episode contains the Seblos talk about Seb having dyslexia. In this episode, Seb confides in Carlos and Carlos decides he will do any activity that Seb wants to do that day. At night, during the fireworks, Carlos had EJ and Big Red spell out “I LOVE YOU SEB” in fireworks. Seb says ILY2 and they kiss under the fireworks.

3x08: Big Red is fed up with Penny trying to push Ashlyn closer to the camp guy and during a conversation with Ashlyn, he gets super short and testy. Ashlyn puts it together that Red is worried again that he’s not enough for her and tells her grandma to back off. She loves Big Red. It dawns on her what she just admitted and plans to tell Big Red under the star light (since lights are their thing). She drags him to a midnight picnic under the stars and they say their ILYs.

Portwell are cute all season. EJ defends his relationship with Gina to his grandfather pretty early in the season. They are full of fluff all season... until 3x12. EJ decides to go to Penn State (or any out of Utah college) for communications and videography. And Gina (once again) gets the rug pulled out from under her, and confused about what that means for her and EJ.

After her talk with Penny in 3x10, Miss Jenn misses the beginning of the camp musicale in 3x11 and flies to California to confess her feelings for Mr. Mazzara. They finally kiss and Mr. M admits California isn’t for him. He’s more of a Utah guy anyway.

Howie tries all summer to get Kourtney’s forgiveness, but she just won’t budge. During the camp musicale he sings another AMAZING ballad and says an impromptu speech about how in awe he is of her and how he screwed up. Kourtney is touched and agrees to start again but he has to gain her trust back.

George and Penny have a sweet moment in 3x11 or 3x12 after he watches Ashlyn and EJ sing and starts to see what Penny sees in the musical/theater stuff.

Ricky, being on the rocks with all his friends, starts to wonder if they were right about Lily. He steals her phone while she’s taking a swim in the lake and sees that she truly is the one behind the horrible pictures of his friends. He confronts her the morning of the musicale and they break up. Throughout the musicale he makes amends with the gang, especially a really sweet Big Red/Ricky moment. Then, the season ends with Ricky looking for Gina to apologize after the show, and she's sitting in the dark, alone by the lake. He notices she’s crying and she admits she doesn’t know what her and EJ’s future is going to be. He sits besides her and wraps an arm around her. SEASON ENDS.

Musical Moments:

The East High Drama Club does another Instagram video but this time to “What Time is It”

a Miss Jenn/Penny duet (HSM’s Ms Darbus and HSMTMTS’s Ms Darbus)

a Kourtney/Ashlyn/Gina acoustic friendship song after Kourtney is hurt by Howie

George singing to Penny as a surprise after he understands her love of musicals for the first time

of course a bunch of others, but that all depends on what musical they do.

If you made it this far, thanks for reading! I liked season 2, but it wasn’t cohesive. Plots were dropped and the core of the characters and friendships were lost or forgotten. I feel like although the characters would be going through individual drama, all their drama is connected and plots aren’t dropped the next episode. Also, I’m neither a Portwell or a Rina, I ship more of Gina and happiness so I tried to give both Portwells and Rinas stuff they would enjoy.

P.S. NiNi is in California writing/recording music. I don’t think Olivia is likely coming back so I had all this in mind without NiNi being on the show.

NEW CAST:

Alyson Reed as Penny Caswell (uhhh hello! Having the OG Ms Darbus apart of HSMTMTS would be perfect!)

Jon Lindstrom as George Caswell (you guys probably don’t know him but he’s a goooood actor, works for ABC who is owned by Disney, and can sing)

[ridemedaddyjames]

Split - Part II

Split - Part I

Pairing: Kevin Wendell Crumb x reader

Warnings: angst, cursing, stockholm syndrome

Words: 2,100

When you woke, Claire and Marcia were huddled on the bed, whispering your name as they pointed towards the entrance. Turning your head, you spotted the man, dressed in different clothing. This time a huge, childlike, grin played across his face.

“My name’s Hedwig. I have red socks,” he said, joyfully, staring at the girls before turning his attention to you. “He’s on the move.” Hedwig giggled, keeping his gaze wandering between you three. Something was different, this wasn’t the same guy who had been in here before. It was almost as if they were all entirely different people. Different personalities jam packed inside one head, all fighting for a chance at the light.

“What did you say?” You asked, confused, pulling yourself from your thoughts as you wondered who this ‘he’ must’ve been.

“He’s...on...the...move,” Hedwig said again, this time enunciating every word. His mentality seemed to be lesser than the previous people he’d pretended to be, and you found it almost comforting.

“Who is?” You questioned, hoping to get some answers out of him.

He seemed to reject the entire question, instead choosing to agh you on by leaving you in suspense. “Someone’s coming for you, and you’re not gonna like it.” The man said, before quickly changing the topic. “You guys make noises in your sleep.” It was like talking to a child. One minute his focus was on you, and the next it was a mile away.

“Hedwig, can you tell me who it is?” You tried again, becoming more sincere with your way of asking.

“I’m not supposed to say,” he teased, laughing like a little kid. “But, he’s done awful things to people, and he’ll do awful things to you.” Hedwig said, excitedly. “I have blue socks too,” he finished, losing his train of thought.

“How old are you?” The question came out almost involuntarily, and you felt bad for asking. This whole situation was growing exceedingly weird, though, and you couldn’t help your hunger for answers. What once had been a dark and brooding man, now seemed to take on a childlike persona. It made you wonder how many different identities must be stuck in there, and you held your breath, waiting for his response.

“I’m nine,” Hedwig shrugged before sitting up a little taller. The man seemed to be proud of his age as he looked at you with what could only be a bright, boyish, smile. It only made you that much more intrigued as you scooted closer to him, feeling less and less nervous by the second.

“You’re not the one that took us?” You asked, sincerely, noticing the way his expression changed. You couldn’t tell if it was from your question, or the way you kept moving nearer.

“No?” He said, confused.

“You’re not the lady?” You tried again, wondering how all of this was real. For a split second you could see an ounce of hurt in his eyes before it flashed back to being entirely perplexed.

“What are you, blind?” Hedwig scoffed, growing more defensive.

“So, you don’t know how they think?” This time, you knew to ask the most strategic question of all, and hoped like hell he’d respond the way you wanted him to.

“No, they don’t tell me much,” he admitted, disappointedly. “I just ate a hot dog,” he said, his train of thought gone again.

Sensing a loophole, you got down on your knees in front of him, trying to get down to his level. If you thought this through, you might’ve just found your escape route.

“Hedwig, can you help us?” There was no hiding the slight begging of your voice, and his eyes grew twice their size at your question.

“No, I’m not even supposed to be here. I stole the light from Mr. Dennis, but he’ll be back real soon.” He panicked, realizing just how much trouble he was going to be in. “I can’t steal the light for too long, or he’ll get angry. Etcetera.” He added, making sure to get his point across. “See ya!” Hedwig shouted, leaping from his spot of the floor as he gripped the door handle.

“Wait!” You shouted, stopping him in his tracks. A plan was forming in your head, and you knew you shouldn’t lie, but for Marcia and Claire, you felt like you had to. Just because you wanted to stay, didn’t mean you had to force them here as well. Especially when you may have just found your one way ticket out of here for them.

“We heard something,” you finally said, catching his attention once again. “We didn’t understand it, but, now we do. Do you know what we heard?” Just like that he’d become completely engrossed in what you had to say, making it too late to back out of your lie.

“What did you hear?” Hedwig asked, eyes as big as saucers. If there was any of them you could trick, it would be him. Which is why you tried to bring him on your side.

“Come here.” The words came out softly as you motioned for him to join you on the floor. “I’ll whisper it to you.” This man was strong enough to snap you in two, and you were treating him like a child. If the other identity came to the light you’d be done for.

The biggest grin spread across Hedwig’s face as he took a split second to think it through before agreeing. This was the closest you’d ever been to any of them, and you should’ve been shaking with fear. Why the hell were you so calm?

“This guy...he’s coming for you,” as soon as the words left your lips his grin faded to absolute horror. You regretted it immediately, wanting to take him into your arms and comfort him. To tell him it was all a lie, and apologize for ever saying it.

“You’re a big fibber,” Hedwig panicked, words coming out fast as he pretended not to believe you.

“I never lie, Hedwig,” and with that one statement, you knew you had him. No matter how badly it hurt you, no matter how much you wanted to confess, it was too late. You couldn’t.

“But, Mr. Dennis, he said that he followed those two girls for four days, and that he knew they were the ones that he would want.” It all came spilling out as if his filter had disappeared, and you knew you were looking in the face of a scared, innocent, child. What you were also getting, though, was answers.

This was going to eat at you forever. You cared for him. Why in the hell did you care for him? Why were you doing this? Was it honestly worth it to torture a little boy with such mind games? God, you hated yourself. Were Claire and Marcia even worth the amount of damage this was going to do to your self esteem? It’s not like you were friends? Hadn’t Hedwig said that Dennis only wanted them? So why were you even here?

Coming back to the task at hand, you looked at the man, his face making you want to cry as you said the next words. “Hedwig, when you’re not around, Dennis and the lady talk about you. We heard them talking about how he wants a boy this time. They said they’re going to give him you.” Your head was splitting in two as you tried to keep up this whole charade. You didn’t even know what this man was going to do to you, but, apparently, it wasn’t good because Hedwig went into full on panic mode.

“No! Miss Patricia, she said...she said she’s not mad at me anymore.” He told you, shaking his head like a child who was just told something they didn’t want to hear. “She sings to me sometimes.” He added, reminding himself that she still cared about him.

“I think Miss Patricia is still a little mad at you,” you continued, only pouring salt on an open wound. Just like that, you could see the tears welling up in his eyes, and it was taking everything in you not to blow your cover. ‘Maybe you were the real monster?’ You thought to yourself, hating what Claire and Monica were turning you into.

“Miss Patricia thinks I’m...” Hedwig started, his sentence breaking cause he didn’t want to say it out loud. Saying it meant opening up, and he couldn’t stop himself from letting you see his true feelings. “She thinks I’m stupid.” He finally said, coming to terms with it. “She thinks I make silly mistakes.”

“Look at me,” you told him, resting your palm against his cheek. His skin was soft; smooth. His eyes were wide with wonder, and you feel him tense under your touch before slowly relaxing. “I’m like your babysitter, okay?” You smiled, tears finally filling your eyes to see how broken he truly was. “I’ll let you watch tv, and I’ll make you a fun dinner. We all need to get out of here. You, Hedwig, you can show us the way.” But you didn’t really want to leave. You wanted to stay and help fix the damage you’d just done to him. The damage that the world had done to him, and to all of the others.

“Wait a minute,” Hedwig realized, coming to his senses. “It took forever to get this place safe without the nosey bodies that work here finding out. You can’t get out of here!” He shouted, taking off towards the door again. “I have to blow my nose!” He said, slamming the door in your face.

“No, wait! Please!” You begged, but it was too late. Just like that you’d been stuck with the preps again, and you silently wished you were the only one he’d taken.

“Guys,” Claire finally said, thinking over what Hedwig had just told you. “He said something about making the room safe.” She looked up at you, hoping you’d have some idea of what that could possibly mean.

“This is all new drywall!” You realized as everyone dispersed, banging on the walls. Claire had opted for the ceiling, pulling the bed over as she stared to knock everywhere.

“Y/N, you were right! He was covering up a way out!” Claire exclaimed, jumping down as she picked up her high heels from the corner of the room. She jabbed it into the ceiling panel, creating a small hole before slamming into it again. Her heel continued to tear into the ceiling until she was able to make a hole large enough to fit through.

“He’s here,” Marcia froze, looking through the crack in the door. Your eyes darted to Claire who started to freak out.

“You can’t let him in! This is our one chance!” She shouted under her breath, trying to get a steady grip on the air vent to pull herself up. Twice she had attempted it; slipping both times.

“We’re not gonna make it!” Marcia told her, losing all hope.

“Yes, we are!” Claire assured her, finally taking hold of it before swinging her leg up to get inside.

“What?” Hedwig asked, trying to get into the room. “Hey, what are you guys doing?” He tried again, pushing against the door. “Hey. Okay, quit it. Guys? Let me in!” He pouted, using all of his strength to open it, but it still wasn’t enough. You and Marcia were holding it shut, your collective weight being enough to keep him out. For now. “What are you guys doing? Guys, you’re not being funny! You’re bein bitches!” He yelled, growing stronger with his rage. “Now, I’m gonna slap you! I’m gonna slap you in your face!” Hedwig threatened, before going back to his usual, soft, self. “You’re gonna get me into trouble!”

His force on the door had ended, he’d completely given up, or so you thought. Without warning a heavy weight was slammed against the door, and you were surprised the door hadn’t broken completely with the amount of forced he’d used against it. No, this wasn’t Hedwig anymore. This was Dennis, and he was mad. Your knees buckled, sending both you and Marcia falling to the floor.

When you looked up, Claire was gone. She’d managed to shimmy herself into the air vent, and you were starting to assume the best until Dennis looked around the room for her, eyeing both you and Marcia scattered across the ground until he let out a frustrated grunt and slammed the door behind himself. That was the last time you’d see Claire for a very long time.

[minijenn]

And now, cause im bored, here's every chapter of Keys briefly summed up in just a few words each (possible spoilers ahead??)

Prologue: The Thirteen Keys: MoM fucks with his students, what else is new

Chapter 1: Remaining Recusant: Riku rescues his boyfriend through the power of Gay

Chapter 2: To Guard the Light: Bunch of boring lore but Sokai makes it worth it

Chapter 3: To Seek the Darkness: Organization shenanigans; Vanitas divorces his shitty, abusive not-dad

Chapter 4: Hero to Zero: Uhhhhh fuckin' Hercules or somethin idk

Chapter 5: Go the Distance: Rage Mode angst is Fun

Chapter 6: Wandering in the Dark: Riku gets a haircut in the Realm of Darkness and Sora really needs to stop lying to everyone

Chapter 7: Promising Beginnings: Kairi and Lea are forced to wear a "get along" shirt

Chapter 8: Lazy Afternoon Streets: Sora has an Identity Crisis part 1

Chapter 9: At Dusk: YA STUPID ORG XIII FUCKHEADS BEST LEAVE MY SON ALONE OR ELSE ILL THROW HANDS

Chapter 10: Sinister Whispers: ^^^ BASICALLY THAT AGAIN ONLY I MEAN IT THIS TIME

Chapter 11: You've Got a Friend in Me: Being a living toy has gotta create some sorta existential crisis, right?

Chapter 12: To Infinity and Beyond: JEN IS GONNA THROW HANDS WITH YOUNG XEHANORT I SWEAR TO GOD I AM

Chapter 13: Chase the Shadows: Detectives Mickey and Riku play a round of "Where's Terra?" And fail miserably

Chapter 14: Paradise Found: Fun with Balloons and Grumpy Geriatrics

Chapter 15: Adventure is Out There: Sora may or may not fall to his death from ridiculously high up in the air i dont fuckin know

Chapter 16: Unspoken, Unheard: Kairi writes Sora a bunch of letters cause she loves him so much but wont say it cause she shy ahah

Chapter 17: How Far I'll Go: MOANA AND SORA ARE MY NEW BROTP

Chapter 18: Know Who You Are: Vanitas gets yeeted by the Ocean cause he a naughty boyo

Chapter 19: The Streets of San Fransokyo: Sora doesnt understand how Technology works what else is new?

Chapter 20: Immortals: everything's all fun and games until Sora's dumbass self-sacrifical complex kicks in (again)

Chapter 21: Depths of Despair: LOOKS LIKE I GOTTA THROW HANDS WITH MALEFICENT NOW TOO

Chapter 22: Rise and Fall and Rise Again: Sora and Kairi hang out and DAMMIT JUST KISS ALREADY YOU DORKS

Chapter 23: The Lost Empire: Lingering Will pops in to say hi and also uhhhh whatever the fuck happens in Atlantis goes down idk

Chapter 24: Where the Dream Takes You: Sora may or may not have PTSD, boi should probs go see a therapist

Chapter 25: Drowning in Darkness: Aqua throws hands then proceeds to get Norted

Chapter 26: I See the Light: Basically KH3's take on Corona but things actually make sense this time

Chapter 27: What Once Was Mine: In which that bit from KH3 where Marluxia knocks Sora out actually leads to some legit payoff smh

Chapter 28: Firsthand Experience: Kairi and Lea take a trip to Disney World and yeet Vanitas (again) right the fuck outta there

Chapter 29: The World Es Mi Familia: Being an (unliving) skeleton also is bound to raise an existential crisis, right?

Chapter 30: Recuérdame: I cry while writing this chapter, both for my baby Xion and because Coco is just that damn tearjerking

Chapter 31: Destined Reunion: ALL THE POLY DESTINY TRIO FEELS

Chapter 32: Something There: At this point even Riku be lookin at Sora and Kairi and shouting "KISS ALREADY YOU ADORABLE DORKS"

Chapter 33: Tale as Old as Time: Sora commits an Actual Murder (am i kidding? Who knooooows)

Chapter 34: The Realm of Darkness: DARK AQUA CAN STEP ON MAH FACE IMO

Chapter 35: Rise to the Light: Great, now Aqua has PTSD too, thanks for nothin, Mickey

Chapter 36: Return to Depart: Sora has another Identity Crisis, part 2

Chapter 37: Broken Chains: Vanitas challenges Sora and Ven to a fight in the Denny's parking lot and fucking loses what else is new

Chapter 38: So This is Love: YES THEY FINALLY KISSED THOSE DORKS

Chapter 39: Almost There: Frogs and also like... Voodoo and so many BBS callbacks so damn many

Chapter 40: Dig a Little Deeper: Sora is too damn stubborn to admit he needs help what else is new

Chapter 41: Follow the Light: Wayfinder Family Reunion saves my life

Chapter 42: Solving Mysteries, Rewriting History: Sora and Goofy meet Donalds family (who then proceed to take the piss outta Donald cause this is Ducktales fam why wouldnt they)

Chapter 43: The Other Promise: Sora has yet another Identity Crisis, part 3

Chapter 44: Vector to the Heavens: Sora and Roxas drink their "Respect and Protect Xion" juice

Chapter 45: Another Arabian Night: Sora, Roxas, and Xion fuck around in a B-list Disney Direct to Video Sequel

Chapter 46: Out of Thin Air: GONNA THROW HANDS WITH XEHANORT HIMSELF THIS TIME AROUND GET AWAY FROM MY SON YA OLD FUCKHEAD

Chapter 47: Alone on the Run: Sora has a Bad Time, Riku and Kairi also have a Bad Time, generally everyone has a Bad Time

Chapter 48: Trust No One: Ven and Roxas add onto the never ending Twin Pile that apparently exists in Gravity Falls

Chapter 49: Not What He Seems: I KNOW ITS NOT UF BUT LOOKS LIKE I GOTTA THROW HANDS WITH BILL CIPHER ANYWAY SOMEHOW

Chapter 50: A Heart Torn Between: Vanitas learns that Girls exist while Sora continues to have a Very Bad Time

Chapter 51: Hawaiian Roller Coaster Ride: Riku's goin on a twink hunt, and dont think he dont know how to weeeeed em out

Chapter 52: Aloha 'Oe: Sora and Riku get into a bit of a lover's spat dont worry about it its nothin serious dont worry about it

Chapter 53: Treasured Memories: Namine is the Very First Person Ever to tell Vanitas he has emotional issues, its about damn time

Chapter 54: Let It Go: KAIRI'S FUCKIN PISSED SHE GONNA BRING HER DAMN DUMBASS WAYWARD BOYFRIEND HOME ALREADY DAMN also Sora hangs out with Elsa i guess

Chapter 55: Love Will Thaw: KAIRI KICKS EVERYONES ASSES INCLUDING SORA'S CAUSE LIKE I SAID SHES FUCKIN PISSED

Chapter 56: Back Into the Fold: Sora doesnt have an Identity Crisis anymore but he sure as hell has Anxiety now, part 4

Chapter 57: Farewell to the Wood: Absolute tone whiplash, brought to you by Winnie the Pooh and Sora's ongoing Existential Crisis too

Chapter 58: Link to All: Everyone just cries a lot for an entire chapter cause they all know they boutta fuckin dieeeee

Chapter 59: Face My Fears: I systematically rip every single one of our protagonists hearts out and stomp on each of them with no remorse whatsoever

Chapter 60: Fragments of Light: The B-Squad saves the day

Chapter 61: The Thirteenth Vessel: Sora hangs out with his New Fam, otherwise known as Organization XIII, family fun ensues and it totally isnt a massive angstfest i dont know what you mean

Chapter 62: Key to the Heart: Riku and Kairi throw hands with their boyfriend while also trying to save their boyfriend it makes sense if ya dont think about it

Chapter 63: The Final World: Sora is McFuckin dead and chilling in heaven with a cute baby plushie cat (hey its not a spoiler if KH3 did it first)

Chapter 64: At Daybreak: "But Jen, if you hate KHX so much then why do you keep making so many references to it???" BECAUSE THATS WHY NOW SHUT UP

Chapter 65: The Keyblade War: Keyblade Fight Club, either you Die or you DIE

Chapter 66: Clash of Light and Darkness: Bunch of teenagers throw hands with some bald old fuckhead, but in the end nobody wins except me

Chapter 67: Kingdom Hearts: You know you're in for something fucking nuts when the chapter title is named after the entire series

Chapter 68: The King and the Crown: Jen pulls off a plot twist so mind blowingly ridiculous that it would probably make Tetsuya Nomura blush

Chapter 69: Reconnect: Everyone has a happy ending except no not really i lied

Chapter 70: Don't Think Twice: Oops I Lied again :)

Epilogue: Dearly Beloved: Fuck KH3's ending this is my new canon now

[stretchjournalemerson]

The Green Life

By Ramona Kriesel

At the tail end of my junior year of high school, my friends and I suddenly became junkies. What had started with Alex’s and my want to find something to sing at our choir concert, something that fit with our director’s theming choice of “colors,” soon spiraled into a bonafide addiction for my social circle. We had gotten ourselves strung out on folk and bluegrass music, hooked for life. I was hooked for life at least, but not just on the general sound of mandolins and banjos. It was the first song, the one Alex discovered in our search for concert material, that stayed with me long after my friends and I moved on from our folk phase. The Arcadian Wild’s “Envy Green” infiltrated into the chemistry of my brain, becoming as much a part of my late teenage years as the obligatory angst. 

If I were to give a reason, I’d say that it’s all due to the fact that the feeling of being understood is the most powerful drug in existence. There was something there in those lyrics that felt like a decryption of my life, like someone had taken the confusing mix of emotions and thoughts and experiences that swirled around my brain and turned it into something that could make sense - be beautiful, even. If the point of listening to music, or consuming art and media in general, is to feel like you are not alone in your human experience, then “Envy Green” was art to me. I might not ever be able to quit that song but at least I have yet to build up a tolerance to it; the first verse and the refrain still have as much as an effect on me as they did the first time I heard them. 

The trees with their branches reach for something higher.

The tips of my fingers always think there's something better, 

something more, 

something worth longing for…

Caught up in the wonder

  of one day being better.

When my deepest darkest blue 

and the gold that paints your sky collide,

the garden comes to life.

We didn’t end up doing the song at the concert. Alex and I decided that we could never replicate the tightly woven three-part harmonies - we couldn’t even pick out the individual singer’s lines through some of the song, which was our only option since there was no available sheet music. We also weren’t confident we could convince a male singer to be our third, and we definitely did not have time to find someone who could play the fiddle. If we were going to perform this song that she really liked and I was in love with, it had to be perfect. Instead, we turned out a pop number that we knew would entertain the crowd of high school parents, even if the failure to live up to our muse would make it a hollow victory.

That summer, I decided that I wouldn’t be pursuing music as a career. After years of dreaming of being a performer I finally faced the fact that success as an artist is paved with years of humiliation and dissatisfaction. It might’ve taken years of auditioning and working creatively deadening jobs until I got lucky, or I could end up stuck as a waitress at Denny’s for the rest of my life. I wanted more out of early adulthood than to be stuck in a career limbo, I wanted the things I did to matter, and I wanted to be satisfied with what I was doing without relying on luck, I wanted something better.

I’d never stop loving music though. I continued to listen to as much folk music as possible, including “Envy Green.” As I began to memorize the lyrics, I started to think more about the second verse and the beginning of the bridge.

The secret inside of me

is sick of silence.

It's calling from the hollow for a greater sense of purpose,

there is more,

more we're intended for…

What if we could take a taste of the maybe,

Beyond what's been known and been named?

Bitter sweet, we're blooming forth from the envy.

I felt lost in my hometown. As I looked around at the dead-end suburban streets and drought-ridden landscapes of southern California, it seemed to me like there wasn’t anywhere to go. I got more and more envious of the east, with its dense and busy cities, the slow but constant change of seasons, and especially its history.

I wanted to move to the east coast, to Boston, because I desperately needed to feel connected to history. The thought of being surrounded by celebrated relics and monuments to important figures of the past was incredibly motivating to me. These places and people fulfilled a greater purpose, they dreamed and schemed and created a brand new democratic system that affected the entire world in ways beyond what they could have possibly imagined. I mean, one of the founder fathers has his own hip-hop musical, how could he have predicted that in 1780? I wanted the same thing - to have a purpose, to do something that benefited society, to earn my place in history, to achieve something greater than myself. I was envious of the historical, and that caused me to work as hard as I could to make sure I had the opportunity to maybe, eventually, do something great. Ultimately, I decided that moving across the country was a step in the right direction. Being able to walk the paths of these mythic figures would make my own path much clearer than it had ever been in California; my envy would keep me from getting lost.

That’s not to say that leaving home wasn’t difficult. During the turbulence and uncertainty of moving and my first month of college, I took comfort in my favorite song. I couldn’t stop myself from playing it in my stress-walks around the Commons or in between classes, although it was the final refrain and chorus that really stuck with me this time.

There’s freedom in the wisdom,

but from the bite Eve lost her Eden.

Caught up in the wonder,

we all wear this scarlet letter.

It is written in our fates,

and the fault is when our stars collide,

the garden will grow wild.

Envy green growing ivy vines that hold me,

up they go,

past the collar bones and freckles on my nose.

Higher, higher 'til the words I tell myself are covered.

Envy Green.

I was so sure of leaving music behind before I did. I was so sure of leaving California before I did. But once I did, that sense of sureness suddenly disappeared. The grass on the other side and all that. I wondered if my longing for something better than what I had and my envy for history’s power of immortality could never be good motivators - they would just end up making me miserable. Once I finally arrived at the life I had been coveting for so long, I found that living it felt strangely empty. It reminded me that envy truly is a sin.

I’m not quite sure if I’ll ever be satisfied. Have I doomed myself already by trying to have what wasn’t mine to begin with? Would it have been better to accept being a mediocre musician? To have stayed in my hometown? Should I learn to accept would I have or should I look for a new motivatiator to achieve beyond my station? I have so many questions that I don’t even know how to begin answering. 

Through it all, however, I have that song - my song. If I don’t understand what to do, then at least it understands my thoughts. One day, I may quit using envy to drive my major life decisions, but I know that I will never, ever, be able to completely quit the piece of music that reflects so much of my life back at me. 

Acknowledgements

I would like to acknowledge The Arcadian Wild for inspiring me with “Envy Green,” Robert Hass for inspiring me with "Chekhov’s Anger," “Poet-Bashing Police,” and “Wallace Stevens in the World," and my Writing 101 class and professor for inspiring me with their feedback and suggestions. Thanks to all. 

[useyourtelescope]

Chocolate Box 2019 Letter

Hello, ChocolateBox creator - thank you in advance for making something for me! Most of my prompts are taken from older letters, but you only need to use them if helps! As long as it doesn’t include any of my DNWs please go wherever inspiration strikes. I’d be thrilled to get something for any of these requests & I’m very excited to see what you create. :)

You can find me on AO3 here for reference.

Though I’ve got different Fic and/or Art requests depending on the prompt, I’d be happy to receive a treat in either format for any.

General Preferences

I prefer third person to first person fic, though focusing on the POV of one or more characters is fine. I love fluff and angst, though I do prefer my angst with a hopeful/happy ending too. Even if it’s not a positive ending, I don’t want anything too dark. I’ll read any rating for my ship prompts, but for prompts involving a Gen (i.e. &) component I’d prefer the rating not exceed a T.

Things that I love include: people going on adventures, road trips, capers/heists, characters learning things about each other that they didn’t previously but also realising they always knew each other, pretending to be a couple for ‘reasons’, unrequited feelings that are secretly not unrequited, bickering as flirting, found families. I’m also a fan of 5 times fic, and a general lover of all kinds of AU fics (though I've mentioned some more specifics below).

As I’m not an art creator I’m not sure what sort of preferences are the most helpful, but I have included some specific art prompts for the requests where I’ve asked for Art.

DNW: Darkfic, horror, incest, rape/noncon, torture, suicide, major character death, terminal illness, threesomes/moresomes, cheating, character bashing.

Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Fic

Jake Peralta/Amy Santiago

Missing moments from their relationship or when they’re on different storylines would be great - some examples include more on Amy’s sticker related bonuses in 3.04 “The Oolong Slayer”, how Amy reacts to updates on Jake’s case with Holt & his mom in 4.19 “Your Honor”, when did they actually move in together post 4.11 “The Fugitive” and how did that go, Amy updating Jake on her first few days as a Sergeant in/post 5.16 “NutriBoom”. The show I think would easily translate to some fun AU scenarios - always welcome a way to work in some of my fave tropes like fake relationship or sharing a bed - but for this show no high school AU’s please (police academy AU is okay though).

This show is my happy place. The examples of missing moments I’ve given are just some that came to mind based on episodes I’ve watched recently, but there’s so many more options so feel free to go crazy with any other episode ideas you might have. I haven’t mentioned any prompts about season 6 because I live in the UK and I don’t know if we’re going to get the new episodes before reveals (doubtful tbh), but if you want to write your take on Jake & Amy’s honeymoon, or any other newlywed scenarios that is A-OK with me, as long as there aren’t any S6 spoilers. I love all the main cast, so feel free to include any of them too - I love when they’re all together on a story. Most recurring characters are welcome, especially Kevin or Doug Judy, but no Pimento please (whose name I just blanked on for a whole minute, and kept trying to write Dennis Feinstein instead LOL).

The Musketeers (2014) - Fic

d'Artagnan/Constance Bonacieux

Future fic: How does d'Artagnan settle into his new role as Captain? When do Constance and D’Artagnan finally sit down and talk about their family, and what do they decide? Regardless of their decision on biological children, I could see them both taking to the new musketeer cadets as their own kids.

Non future fic prompts include: pre-s3 Constance adjusting to her new role with The Musketeers and/or D’Artagnan doing the same when he comes back from the war, various AUs. Modern AU where they are at university, or working together; historical AU, Space AU, etc.

For all that Constance had a new role in Season 3, we didn’t really see the finer details of her in that position, and I would love something that expanded on that. How does D’Artagnan becoming Captain at the end of the series affect their dynamic? I was frustrated by the fact that Constance and D’Artagnan both said different things about having children in season 3 to other people, but we never saw them have a conversation with each other about it. I would love to see that discussion, and how they both come to terms with each other’s position. Personally, I think Constance has always shown a maternal side to her, and back in season 1 there was that ep where she was reluctant to part with that baby. In the context of the war I can understand her feeling differently, but I want that conversation to be hashed out. Does Constance change her mind eventually or not? I could see Constance and D’Artagnan not having a baby, but adopting (maybe even by accident) and I would love fic of D’Artagnan trying to parent a moody 15 year-old.

Also, I know my further details have been canon based, but I really would enjoy getting a complete AU of the show. I could see the dynamics being a lot of fun in a modern AU - I think Constance and d’Artgnan at uni would be cute. Or perhaps a different historical (Regency?) or Feel free to include others from the show. I love Constance & Anne's friendship, and would be happy to see any of the other Musketeers and/or Sylvie as long as the focus doesn’t change.

Agent Carter - Fic/Art

Peggy Carter/Daniel Sousa

First case together, the last time they saw each other before Sousa left for LA, anything post-canon – the immediate aftermath of the s2 finale or building a life together later on. Working on a case together for the first time as a couple could be fun along with the other characters (I really enjoyed episodes like 2x05 and 2x10 where everyone’s working together, so feel free to include any of the main characters). AU in a different period piece - e.g. Peggy & Daniel trying to solve a case in an Agatha Christie style 1920/30s mystery

More art specific prompts: secret hand holding in the office or out in the field, a fun day out, acting as the other’s backup, any of Peggy’s amazing outfits.

I’ve suggested a different period setting for my AU prompt because I find it hard to visualise them in a Modern AU - though I’m willing to be proved wrong :). I usually prefer fluffy, cute fics, but Peggy and Sousa do angsty longing so well, so if you want to lean more that way that’d be great too.

Friday Night Lights - Fic

Luke Cafferty/Becky Sproles, Mindy Collette/Billy Riggins & Becky Sproles

Luke/Becky - Future fic years after we left them (whether they are still making it work or drifting apart), missing scenes exploring things we skipped over during the show (especially post season four but before they actually started dating), or canon divergent AU only meeting after high school on their way back to Dillon with mixed feelings about it.

Mindy/Billy & Becky - Future fic of how Becky is part of Mindy & Billy’s lives after the finale e.g. Becky babysitting so they can have a date night, or Becky coming back to Dillon after a long time away and going to visit them. Something from the earlier stages of Mindy & Billy’s relationship (with slight canon-divergence to include a different way Becky might have met them).

Luke & Becky can be so angsty but also so sweet so I’d really love an exploration of their feelings about their own lives and each other. One of my favourite things in the fifth season was Becky’s relationship with Mindy and how she became a part of that family - I did not expect their goodbye in the finale to be the bit that made me cry the most! There is such a lack of fic for either relationship I’ve requested so honestly please totally disregard my prompts if you have an idea for either of these that’s totally different. This is one show where I actually love all the main characters so I’d be happy to see anyone turn up. I loved Luke’s friendships with Vince and Tinker, would be great to see Tyra and/or Tim in making an appearance with the Collette-Riggins family (I do like Tyra/Tim if that helps), but no need to limit it to characters that are more likely to interact with them.

Crazy Rich Asians - Fic

Astrid Leong/Charlie Wu

Future fic: What happens the night of Nick & Rachel’s engagement party? What happened in their scene at the wedding that didn’t make the final cut of the film? Longer-term, how do the changes to Astrid’s story in the film (versus the book) affect what she does next? Or maybe a complete twist and Astrid only meets Charlie at the engagement party - she’s not ready for a relationship yet so they end up FWB at first? AUs welcome - various meet-cutes such as spins on other romcoms could be fun. Happy for this to be more Astrid focused, but with a healthy dose of Charlie.

I read all the books before seeing the film, so although I wasn’t completely surprised Charlie’s role had been mostly cut & Astrid’s story simplified, it left me wanting more. I love them in the books - both as individual characters and their relationship - and would like to see how that ties into movie-verse since Astrid left Michael sooner. Does she start going on the path she ends up in book 3 sooner, or does she go in a completely different direction? What does Astrid & Charlie reconnecting look like if they start to become friends again when she’s not with Michael anymore? Maybe their relationship turns romantic sooner, but then Astrid isn’t ready for something as serious as Charlie is, which could lead to some juicy angst? I enjoy a good romcom and would love a twist on a classic storyline/tropes with these characters - friends with benefits, marriage of convenience, etc. Maybe some kind of You’ve Got Mail AU (or loosely anyway, since I can’t imagine Charlie ever being that set against Astrid!)

If you’d like to include other characters from the film that’s great - my faves to include in this would probably be Rachel, Peik Lin, Oliver and Nick.

Timeless - Fic or Art

Rufus Carlin & Wyatt Logan & Lucy Preston, Rufus Carlin & Wyatt Logan/Lucy Preston, Wyatt Logan/Lucy Preston

Rufus & Wyatt & Lucy: What I’d most like for them is little moments of friendship unrelated to missions. I loved in S1 when we got a scene of the three of them having a drink together and would love for more along those lines - going out for drinks, or to the movies, or starting a book club, game nights, anything like that – or quiet moments in the lifeboat that bond them all together.

Wyatt/Lucy: canon divergence: slow burn, fake relationship/undercover as married, stolen moments between/on missions, secret relationship, a different way the Jessica storyline might have played out (or post-Hollywood if she hadn’t reappeared) AU where the team is formed under different (non-time travel) circumstances. Future fic leading on from S210.

More art specific prompts: a scene in mission in their various period garb, with the Lifeboat, arriving in a new place, Wyatt/Lucy hand-holding/touches of comfort or reassurance, Future!Wyatt and/or Future!Lucy

The most important thing to note here is that I live in the UK I haven't been able to watch the special finale episodes yet! I'm aware of some things that happened in the finale, but I'm trying to stay mostly unspoiled - therefore none of my prompts relate to events after the original end of season 2. If I manage to see it before the story deadline I will edit this, but I think that’s unlikely. If you want to do future fic it’s totally up to you how you deal with the extra canon - I’m assuming they figure out a way to save Rufus (because I just cannot deal with thinking about any other outcome) so if you want to skip over all that and just have the trio hanging that’s cool, or if there was something in the finale you would have tackled differently go for it! Happy for any of the team to be featured as long as focus is on these 3 or 2 depending on what we matched :).

The 100 (TV) - Art

Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin

Hand holding, shared looks or gentle touches (I’m thinking something like 4.03 here), reading together, hanging out in a modern AU or dressed up in a period piece.

Is it obvious I like hand-holding yet? Lol. I’d just like these two being soft and happy since they never really have time for that in canon! For fic for this ship I’m usually all about complete AU or Canon Divergence, but with art I’d be happy with something canon compliant, e.g. drawing of a scene or your take on them setting foot on a new world.

[latveriansnailmail]

OC meme answers

Filling out the previous post.

1. Your first OC ever? The earliest character I remember making was an armored flamethrowing bad guy named Cinder. I made him to be an antagonist for my brother's OC. Cinder is an industrial saboteur in his current incarnation. 2. Do you have a personal favourite among your OCs? I am probably most fond of Nick Chapel, Psychic Detective. 3. Have you ever adopted a character or gotten a character from someone else? Several. A good handful of my characters were PCs in tabletop games I ran. 4. A character you rarely talk about? The less developed they are, the less I talk about them. 5. If you could make only one of your OCs popular/known, who would it be? I have several favorites but I think the world would get the most milage out of Man Man. He always manages to be in the wrong despite his best intentions. 6. Two OCs of yours that look alike despite not being related? There are trends. Open shirts. Facial hair. Tattoos. Sunglasses. No capes. 7. Are your OCs part of any story or stories? I'm building fuel for several stand alone books set in a common universe. 8. Do you RP as any of your OCs? If you do, introduce one of your RP OCs here! Nick Chapel and Swingin' Johnny Go both began as Old World of Darkness characters. Nick was my Gangrel and Johnny was an Ecstatic mage. 9. Would you ever be willing to give any of your OCs to someone else? I would give back what I have borrowed. I might lend an OC if said OC was already well established and characterized. 10. Introduce an OC with a complicated design? What, visually? Probably Upside Downe is the most complicated because he's more of a celebrity (of the modern fashion) than a superhero. As such his look varies from day to day but is always flamboyant. In his early conception I took some inspiration from Dennis Rodman. Nowadays he's closer to Red Foo. 11. Is there any OC of yours you could describe as a “sunshine”? Maybe el Constrictador. 12. Name an OC that isn’t yours but who you like a lot I tend to be drawn to any character who is a fanatic or a literal angel, preferably both at the same time. 13. Do you have any troublemaker OCs? Lady Angst is true to her name. 14. Introduce an OC with a tragic backstory I try to stay away from that trope since it's done into the ground in the superhero genre (see women in refrigerators.) That said, I suppose Maxine Force has seen some tragedy of late; her husband died suddenly and painfully, Maxine tried to transfer his consciousness into an AI, and then said AI was overwritten and appropriated by enemy agents, resulting in a twisted android mockery of a good man. 15. Do you like to talk about your OCs with other people? AD INFINITUM 16. Which one of your OCs would be the best at biology (school subject)? Definitely Professor Pinnacle though Man Man is a close second. 17. Any OC OTPs? Lady Angst/Swingin' Johny Go, as well as Zapatta the Mystic/Maid Malice 18. Any OC crackships? Idano, I guess Nick and Melanie Plutarch. That's going nowhere. 19. Introduce an OC that means a lot to you (and explain why) I'm still working on this character but Quanta is based on a teacher I respect. 20. Do any of your OCs sing? If they sing, care to share more details (headcanon voice, what kind of songs they like etc)? The Fat Lady is a coloratura and an amazing improvisational singer, though she tends to shatter all glass in the vicinity. Johnny is the front man of a swing band and can also use his sonic powers to manifest music but he says it's just not the same as a live performance. 21. Your most artistic OC Again, Johnny. In addition to singing and playing, he crafts string instruments semi-professionally. 22. Is there any OC of yours people tend to mischaracterize? If yes, how? I have to be very deliberate in my depiction of Solomon King. He's a guy wearing a flag so I have to be clear with his characterization and his ideals, or else people would just project their personal politics on him. 23. Introduce OC that has changed from your first idea concerning what the character would be like? Thorn was originally just some generic beefy white dude in his 20s with plant powers. The current Doctor Thorn is 50 or older, a genius botonist, black, an amputee, and very cynical owing to the public's past reception of his race. Hell, public's not crazy about him right now. 24. If you could meet one OC of yours, who would it be and why? I would meet the Stregga Sisters so I could ask what their deal is. I need to develop them. 25. The OC that resembles you the most (same hobby, height, shared like/dislike for something etc?) As a younger man, that would most closely be Johnny but now I'm turning 39 and I identify more with Nick. We both prefer classic movies. 26. Have you ever had to change your OC’s design or something else about them against your will? I was confronted with how 7 out of 7 of my most significant American figures were all male so I gender-swapped Maxwell Force into Maxine. S/he's more interesting now. I have plenty of female characters (close to half) and a loooot of female second bananas but the lack of female leadership is still something I'm struggling with. 27. Any OCs that were inspired by a certain song? Actually, the first plot scenario and its main perpetrators came to me in a dream, complete with a rap song. So in particular Edifice Wrex is the rapper of my dreams. 28. Your most dangerous OC? DEFINITELY the Chokester. Imagine the Joker crossed with Venom and classically trained in traditional European buffoonery. 29. Which one of your OCs would go investigate an abandoned house at night without telling anyone they’re going? Several, really. Nick, Zapatta... Lady Angst would live cast it. 30. Which one of your OCs would most likely have a secret stuffed animal collection? La Nina maybe. Of course life on the road would mean nowhere to keep it... 31. Pick one OC of yours and explain what their tumblr blog would be like (what they reblog, layout, anything really) Let me point out that I myself have been involved with goth culture since about 1995. That said, Lady Angst is heavily involved with social media and reblogs all the most ridiculously stereotypical goth stuff with plenty of vaguebooking thrown in as she bemoans her personal situation and throws shade at people in the community. She has the worst kept secret identity in the whole long underwear game. 32. Which one of your OCs would be the most suitable horror game protagonist and why? Spiderbite Emma is a pragmatic survivor. Plus she can turn people into wolves so she's got that going for her. 33. Your shyest OC? I've gathered many brazen personalities, them being superheroes and all. That said, probably Catfight. Her anthro-feline body is a constant target for unwanted attention. 34. Do you have any twin characters? Not at this time. 35. Any sibling characters? Reveal: Angst and Emma are sisters! Don't tell no one. Be cool. I'm still cooking the Force family but there's the young adult Gail Force and the tween Maxwell (found a new use for that name.) 36. Do you have OC pairs where the other part belongs to someone else (siblings, lovers, friends etc)? Nope. 37. Introduce an OC who is not quite human Like all of them. I just got finished fleshing out a OC who's a sasquatch, Professor "Squatcho" Henderson. 38. Which one of your OCs would be the best dancer? For all her flaws, sucking at dancing is not among Lady Angst's failings. Zapatta is two thousand years old and lascivious so he can probably cut a rug. For that matter and for similar reasons Santacles would know every winter folk dance there is. 39. Introduce any character you want I have a fondness for the Keeper, a combo speedster/tank. She’s Britain’s most popular hero, goalkeeper themed, and seven and a half feet tall. She was born out of some RPG build experiments, the idea being that her low end cosmic awareness tells her what’s happening, her speed helps her intervene, and then her thick skin absorbs the hit. 40. Any fond memories linked to your characters? Feel free to share In my early 20s I used to hang out at night with friends of mine in the local all night diner, drinking unlimited coffee, playing games, eating the breakfast buffet, etc. We were all either just out of college or just out of high school and we were all commiserating our bleak futures. I would sketch and color a character pic every night. Most of those characters are scrapped now but a few (like Sonofagun) have made the cut. The pictures got moldy in storage, sad to say. 41. Has anyone drawn fanart of your OCs? If yes, maybe show a picture or two here (remember sources & permissions!) See above. 42. Which one of your OCs would be the most interested in Greek gods? Many of them ARE Greek gods. My Mary Sue, Mail-man would be most genuinely interested. 43. Do you have any certain type when you create your OCs? Do you tend to favour some certain traits or looks? It’s time to confess See above, #6. 44. Something you like about your OCs in general They are diverse and few have anything stereotypical about them. They are all their own people. 45. A character you no longer use? NEVER ASK ME ABOUT STEVE 46. Has anyone ever told you that you treat your OCs badly? Nah. I'm so wary of fridging characters that I don't heap much abuse on them. Plus, there's a revolving door on death. 47. Has anyone ever (friendly) claimed any of your OCs as their child? As I've said, some are on permanent loan from their player parents. 48. OC who is a perfect cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure Nah. Maybe Catfight. She's trying to get into Man Man's crew and it's going to be disastrous. 49. Which one of your OCs would most likely enjoy memes Probably Magnum Opus. 50. Give me the good ol’ OC talk here. Talk about anything you want Top Rocker of Earth has a passing similarity to Lobo in that both are cosmic bikers and general nasty asskickers but in truth Top draws most from Terrax the Tamer. If you want, you can tag your ask answers with #yetanotherOCmeme so I can check them out too `v´9

[sudsybear]

Fools in Love

The month of May in our school system is a busy one. Just like last year, I was scheduled to the minute. State standardized tests on a Saturday morning, music honors night, Senior Honors night, May Fete, Spring Choir Concert, Memorial Day weekend, and final exams. Somewhere in there Mom and Dad took a long weekend for a business conference in Opryland, Tennessee. Mom arranged for someone to stay at the house while they were gone. Prom was also on the calendar.

 Ross and I talked about going to my senior prom. Friends were all going - Erin, Julie, David, Igor. Ross was the only person I considered going with. But I certainly wasn’t excited about the dance, especially after my experience at Junior Prom; drunken teenagers crying over boyfriends, and vomit in the restroom. The band usually sucks, and the company ridiculous, what’s the fun of that? Not to mention it’s a lot of money to spend – for what? A photo? I just couldn’t put Ross through that cheesy teenage angst. He had attended at least three proms and I don’t know how many SubDeb formals, plus cotillion, why would he want to go through that again? Instead after tense negotiation, my parents waived my usual curfew and we (just the two of us) went out to dinner -  probably Denny’s.

 Graduation was imminent and I received cards of congratulation, gifts large and small, tokens of remembrance from family and friends. Ross joined in the spirit of the occasion, adding his own brand of humor to the mix:

  Post marked 3 Jun 1985, Cincinnati, OH

 High school Graduation card, inscribed,

 “…Or the bunny slippers will do nicely!

 Happy Graduation!

 Love, Ross”

  High school graduations are mainstays of community tradition. Superintendents speak, along with members of the elected school board. Choirs sing, valedictorians and salutatorians speak, diplomas are distributed, and the graduates recess.

Wyoming High School holds itself to a different formal standard, no mere cap and paper gown ceremony in the school auditorium. Graduation is a community Event held outdoors in a lovely garden setting. As the school orchestra plays tired and overused Pomp and Circumstance, matching pairs of younger sisters of the graduates glide down the graduation walk, and on cue, raise floral arches for the graduates to parade through.

 The arches themselves are a community project, created from flowers donated from neighborhood suburban gardenscapes and supplemented with floral shop greenery. Some years there aren’t enough younger sisters to create an effective walkway, so there’s a sign-up sheet for undergraduate co-eds who want to participate. I had served as an arch-bearer in May after my Junior year, as a “sister” to Aarne, the foreign exchange student we hosted. Julie and Erin had also taken their turns in previous years.

 Male graduates wear tuxedos. Every year the senior guys vote whether to wear white or black jackets. There is a fitting day when the rental agency comes to the high school and measures all the participants for their tuxes. The girls wear white long dresses and carry one red rose. There are rules, too. Nothing bare shouldered, the dress must have sleeves or straps at least one inch wide. No plunging necklines, the dress can be no shorter than 3 inches above the floor. On graduation day, lace is on hand to staple to the hem of a dress if it is too short. The dress must be white, not ivory, eggshell or ecru. White. If any dress is questioned, a group of teachers rule whether or not the dress is acceptable. If your family cannot afford tuxedo rental or dress purchase, there is a fund to provide the necessary clothing. Every spring there is a flurry of phone calls to parents of previous year’s graduates. “What size was Jenny’s graduation dress? Julie needs a size eight. Well, do you know anyone who might have a size eight graduation dress? Thank you, I’ll call her now.” Invariably, a couple of women pick up extra money in the spring making graduation dresses. There are fittings, and more than one girl graduates with her dress still just pinned together, or with her hem held in place with masking tape.

 Mom and I conspired to have my own dress made by a friend of hers. Mom was busy finishing up her own studies, and didn’t have time to make my dress. So at the fabric store, we chose a pattern, selected the material and notions and delivered them all to a seamstress friend. I went to a couple of fittings in May and after graduation, sometime later in June, we hacked off the length and I wore it as a sundress.

 There was however, no requirement for footwear. Over the winter I had taken to wearing red fuzzy slippers in school. More comfortable and convenient than shoes, I kept them in my locker to wear when boots were required outside. And so, I suggested it would be fun to wear those bright red slippers under my graduation dress. My eldest brother did something equally benign, yet outlandish at his college graduation a few years previous. Family tradition needed to be upheld! Ross thought it would be cool, friends encouraged me. Mother was terrified. I smuggled the slippers out of the house when I left the house for graduation rehearsal. Mom discovered this, panicked, and dispatched my father to the school to make sure I did NOT wear those bunny slippers. In shame, I turned them over. A harmless prank stopped cold.

 I wanted to skip the graduating class boat cruise on the Ohio River and spend the time with Ross instead. I forget who convinced me to go on the cruise – probably a combination of Mom, Ross and friends. In the end I’m glad I did go. When the music got loud and the dancing began, I disappeared out on the deck and found John. He and I spent the evening chatting. We were in the same class, had the same teachers since Fourth Grade, and yet had never conversed with each other outside of class. We knew the same people, experienced the same dances, the same football and basketball games, and yet our lives never crossed outside the school walls until graduation night. He left the next morning for boot camp, having joined the Marines. He was terrified. We had a great talk that night.

 Today, John works as a police/fire/ambulance dispatcher. He retired from the Marines, has a wife and some kids.

 After the boat cruise, Ross picked me up in the Vanagon (I know he planned that vehicle choice!) and we spent the rest of the night together. First, a stop to change clothes. I never was one for stockings and heels. Perhaps the pantyhose I wore were a size too small - the compression on my legs and abdomen was unbearable by the time Ross picked me up. I sat in the passenger seat, slid off my shoes, hiked up my skirt and wriggled out of those hose. Evil things in my experience. Ross laughed at my antics as I scratched my legs to bring the feeling and circulation back. Sometime in the previous twenty-four hours he acquired a change of clothes for me, and I slipped into the back of the Vanagon and changed into more comfortable shorts and T-shirt. I was human again!

 We headed to Denny’s to refuel and compare our evenings. While I cruised the Ohio River on a paddle-wheeler with my classmates, Ross caught up with a couple of buddies of his own. After our midnight feast, we drove around a bit listening to music and talking. And let’s face it, I was seventeen and horny as anything. Ross was nineteen and horny as anything! I wanted to consummate our love and make it last forever.

 Ross parked the Vanagon in some remote spot and we retired to the back. We lay down and were passionate, and tender with each other. Like so many “first times” I was embarrassed by my ineptitude. I was also naïve, ignorant, and yes as much as we joked, innocent. Sharing my insecurities, Ross was supportive and loving and careful and respectful. We giggled with embarrassment, shared tears of love and fear, and hugged for reassurance. While I was technically still a virgin as dawn approached, we had enjoyed each other’s bodies so thoroughly and so mutually, the loss of my virginity was now a mere technicality to be overcome. We would get there, in time, with practice. We hoped, we planned, we played. Ross delivered me back to my parents’ house at some early hour of the morning, just in time for me to catch a couple hours of nap before I showered, dressed and accompanied Dad and my brother to Mom’s graduation.

 Mom’s graduation was amazing. All the while I was growing up, she worked toward her nursing degree. She took a morning course here, an evening course there. She took a couple of summer courses. Then finally, her coursework was done and she would graduate - the same weekend of my high school graduation. Exhausted, and still attached to Ross, I trekked with my family downtown to the UC graduation ceremonies. We were so proud of mom!

 After the ride back from downtown, I drove to Erin’s for her graduation party. Erin’s mom put on an elegant affair. She had prepared for weeks – planning the menu, preparing what she could before hand. The whole event took place in the back yard under the trees. Tables were brought in and set with linens and silver and fine china. Erin’s family was visiting from all over the country (Michigan, Rhode Island, Florida) and she invited several friends over. I was one of the last guests to arrive. I parked my Pinto in the driveway and walked around to the back yard. Erin and Christopher and other friends were sitting at a table under a tree, and waved me over to join them.

 Everyone celebrated with champagne. I had never had champagne before. Never. Erin, Christopher and a couple of other friends told me to “catch up”, so I started drinking. I drank about a bottle and a half of champagne in an hour and a half, and I don’t remember much else. I have a vague recollection of vomiting all over little brother Michael’s bathroom. (He reminds me of it to this day.)  After someone called my parents, my mother (the new graduate herself!) drove over to collect me, thoroughly embarrassed.

 When I got home with Mom, I crawled up the back steps to the house and my father was absolutely furious. Through the fog of drunken blackout, my father’s voice rang clear; full of anger and disappointment. I had royally screwed up. I somehow made it up two flights of stairs to my room and passed out for twenty-four hours. I have yet to drink champagne again. I never drank that much again either. I made a complete ass of myself in front of the family of one of my closest and dearest friends. Our relationship has never been the same, but I learned to stop drinking when the world started spinning.

 *          *          *

 Ross’ and my friendship developed in part because of those letters I sent to him at Wooster. So I continued writing letters even when Ross lived just a couple of blocks away. I dropped them off at the house, or handed one to him at the end of an evening. He tried his own hand at it. He references a previous letter, which is lost to the ages...

 no postmark – this was scrawled on a yellow legal pad, with matching folded and stapled envelopes and then personally delivered.

 Tues. 6-11-85

11:14

(same time as last letter.)

 Dear Susanx,

 I am very glad we got to talk tonight. (Opus just said “Hello.” He misses you.) I am afraid I may have said some things tonight which really hurt your feelings. That was certainly not the intention.

(This letter sure is serious, isn’t it?)

BOKX is having a hard time with words tonight.

And well, dammit, hey I miss you. You’re smart as hell, did you know that? Yes.

That was really interesting that you said that I respect you * because that’s a bigger part of a relationship than I ever think it is. What a non-coherent sentence. The old cognitive processes are wearing thin tonight. I read somewhere (probably Reader’s Digest) that people who have sex with each other before they are married don’t respect each other and get divorced. I’m really intimidated by you sometimes, but you don’t make me feel like an ASSHOLE, though, just young.

*you said that Saturday night.

 2

 This relationship

I hate that word

                               Choose one

This (Thing, friendship, ordeal, affair, association, etc.) has done me a lot of good. I guess every relationship does, but……..more than usual, or what?

HEY! I’m too tired.

Good night.

I wanna talk to you.

I miss you like crazy!

See ya Friday

(Thursday?)

Love,                      

Ross                      

 With our experience the night of my graduation, Ross’ and my friendship blossomed into full summer romance. Our thought processes paralleled while our hormones raged. We joked about being "worse than married.” That passionate beginning of a relationship when you eat, drink, smell, hold onto and BE with the other person because of the way he or she makes you feel. Two people retreat into their own world and focus on becoming "one.” And, if all goes right, they do become one. Ross and I were "one".

 Susanx, (or Soozin-X) and BOK or (Bok-x) are terms of endearment I suppose. But it goes deeper than that. You know those family interactions that are so personal an outsider has no idea what’s going on? One family member says just one or two words and the whole family starts laughing, caught up in a memory. For my parents and me, it’s the Farkle Family. For the Jeynes family it’s “Dum.” Bein’ DUM, or ‘tardid is something that developed in their family long before I became involved. By the time I happened in behaviors and rituals were ingrained and formalized writings were developed. What is it? Basically the family poking fun at the developmentally disabled – but not really. They are mostly poking fun at themselves. Those times in your life when you do or say something completely inappropriate or wrong – a social gaffe, you trip over the carpet, you mis-speak or let a fart rip at the wrong time. In polite society you say such things as “Excuse me,” “I’m so sorry,” or “I am so embarrassed.” But at the Jeynes’ you put your tongue between your molars, bite down and pretend to chew all the while making grunting noises. Are you feeling silly? Chew your tongue, hold your hands at an awkward angle in front of your chest and waggle them back and forth while twitching your whole body. Alternately grunt and exclaim, “I’m ‘tardid.”

 The nicknames and writing were just extensions of those physical antics. Ross was BOK or BOK-X, Scott was Skot-X, and their parents were Mom-X and Dad-X. I happened along and quickly became Susan-X. If truly in a silly mood, notes were written ‘tardidly.’ Words were spelled phonetically with some letters reversed, homophones deliberately used to confuse the reader and preferably written using your opposite writing hand so the whole note was childlike. The suffix –x was added according to whim, when and where it seemed appropriate.

 It was really easy to catch the hang of it all, and was such a simple way to express frustration without needing to stop and think about what words appropriately expressed your feelings at the moment. Tired and melancholy? One slow chew on your tongue with a long grunt expressed the entire emotion. I choo-ed whenever I made a mis-statement, which was often, and wrote notes to Ross and Scott in my own ‘tardid style. I embraced the silliness, adding my own twists and incorporating the behavior into my being.

 *          *          *

 Opus, aaah, Opus. Berkeley Breathed kept us entertained in the ‘80s, didn’t he? As I grew up, like so many girls I moved from drawing rainbows and collecting stuffed animals to liking unicorns and dragons and then right about eighth or ninth grade, Bloom County came along. Milo’s Meadow, Binkley’s closet of anxieties, Opus the penguin, and the outrageous and unenlightened WASP, Steve Dallas. They all played out personal and national angst, gave us political satire, and some completely outrageous story lines, including Cutter John and crew buffooning Star Trek and Star Wars. I loved it, even if I didn’t understand half the political references. I clipped favorite strips from the newspaper and put them on my notebooks for school. Mark and I built our own “Snow Opus” earlier that winter. On a snowy day, it provided us an afternoon of entertainment and for a few days following the commuters along Springfield Pike had a new landmark. I loved Opus, so sad, so lost, so lonely, and so silly – I wanted to sit with he and Milo in the meadow and contemplate the dandelions. (These days my daughter calls them “Dandyflowers” and picks them by the handfuls to put in vases on the kitchen table.)  Ross gave me a plush Opus, one of millions sold, and I kept it in his room. His mom gave me a pair of pink high top sneakers – just like Ross’ Converse Chuck Taylor’s. But she painted Opus on the ankle where the Converse emblem might have appeared. Oh bless her! They were wonderful! I loved them and wore them all that summer and then off to college.

 Today, I read “For Better or For Worse” with the same enthusiasm. While Lynn Johnston is decidedly not Berkeley Breathed, her insight into family relationships and talent for communicating to her audience through her drawings is no less remarkable. I cried when Farley the dog died, and rejoiced when Michael and Deanna were married. I worried about “Lizard Breath” away at University, and laugh at April’s antics. Like millions of others, I also loved Gary Larson’s Far Side. And like fans all over the world, I trimmed favorite panels from the newspaper and mounted them on notebooks, and posted them on doorways and lockers. Somehow Rubes just doesn’t have quite the same absurdity. Instead I scour the web for sites like The Onion and Fark – following links from Weird Web. The methods have changed, but the search for humor remains constant.

 *          *          *

 Ross quit his job at Burger King. He passed along his mowing jobs to other friends, and started a co-op job writing computer code, the first of many. When he wasn’t listening to music and/or tinkering with the computers, he spent hours under the hood of one car or another. Like the summer before, I was a professional baby-sitter, nanny, and mother’s helper. I had at least four families using my services. I stayed with one little girl while her mother worked mornings two days/week. I stayed with two little boys while their mother worked evenings two days/week. I helped one woman who was greatly pregnant, and just needed someone to help out a couple hours a week, and just like the previous summer, at least one night every weekend, I provided some set of parents the opportunity for dinner and a movie. Ross stopped by after the kids went to bed and were asleep. Then, when the parents got home and I was done for the evening – we went out. Our time together rarely started before ten o'clock in the evening. We caught a late movie, then drove over to Denny's or Skyline to talk and hang out and do what teenagers do.

  Fools in Love

Joe Jackson

 Fools in love, well are there any other kind of lovers? Fools in love, is there any other kind of pain?

Everything you do, everywhere you go now Everything you touch, everything you feel Everything you see, everything you know now Everything you do, you do it for your lady Love your lady, love your lady Love your lady, love...

Fools in love, are there any creatures more pathetic? Fools in love, never knowing when they've lost the game

 Fools in love they think they're heroes 'Cause they get to feel no pain I say fools in love are zeros I should know, I should know Because this fool's in love again

Fools in love, gently hold each others hands forever Fools in love, gently tear each other limb from limb

 Fools in love they think they're heroes 'Cause they get to feel no pain I say fools in love are zeros I should know, I should know Because this fool's in love again

  A week later:

 Monday night 11:14

6-17-85

 Hello.

Tonight was nice.

I was not uncomfortable.

Saturday night and last Wednesday night deserve some discussion.

“Just Friends” doesn’t work sometimes.

On the other hand, I am out of hand. Which goes back to Saturday night.

 Hello, Tis Jo.

That wasn’t intentional.

 Back to less serious topics ------------

Dictionary Translation Guide for Burger King

  English

Burger King

“May I help  you?”

Shuwann?

“Please  drive around to the side window”

Pullroun

“A Whopper  with cheese.”

Whoppachese

“Would you  like me to get the manager?”

Fucyouman

“You made a  mistake”

Wutchoothought?

“No Way”

BOOshit

  I  AM EMOTIONNNALLEEE

DISTURBED

 Opus says “Hi!”

I’m tired.

I miss you.

I want to talk, but then again

I think we’ve been spending

           One hell of a lot of time together.

Seriously, the last whole day we didn’t see each other was Sunday when you were “incapacitated” (sp?)

           And before that? Who knows?

Which doesn’t mean that I’m sick of you, or something like that.

Just emotionally attached,

BIG TIME.

And I’m gonna be fucked over BIG TIME when you leave.

 Upon analysis, I find that all of my troubles can be connected or broken down into lack of self-confidence.

 I reeelly wish we could talk right NOW.

 Here’s the office at work

 [drawing]

 Fun letter?

No.

OK. Well

Good night.

I            me       tired.

One word

Ime

(I’m)

 Love,

BOK,

Ross

  At the tender age of 19, Ross’ powers of observation and attention to detail amaze me even now. This mid-80s transliteration of Ebonics - who knew thought such a thing existed? He knew himself well enough to know when he was in trouble. But I didn’t. Almost twenty years later, I think I finally have some inkling of my strengths and weaknesses, but it’s taken years of talking to mental health professionals to discover them. Were we emotionally attached? Yes, BIG TIME!

 *          *          *

 Hand delivered, Cincinnati, OH.

 6-20-85

Dear Susan,

           Sometimes life really sucks. For trivial reasons. And that makes it seem even worse. What a terrible mood I’m in. I thought about you at the concert last night.

OH funnyness. The seating arrangement was perfect.

Steve Sarah  SkotX Jon  Bok  I was as far away from Steve as possible, and he still annoyed the hell out of me. Don’t get drunk at the Herd’s tonight. (Just kidding, you can if you want.) Elapsed time. OK, now I’m in a better mood. I hope you can go Friday. This is a really surfacy (a new word) letter. Well Bummafuckarolla. The miricale of electronic mail…..I forgot what I was going to say. But I can’t spell anymore. That is a real CTC spelling. Just like one, too, three, for. It’s miracle, right? My mind is fucked over. I never could spell “nessseecary”. You know what the word is, even if I can’t spell it tho, right? THO? I’m tardid. Maybe it’s tardidness what has commited this terrible crime upon my soul. BOK. Bok’s on break right now ‘cause he can’t think of anything to do.

           OK, back to what I was saying about the concert, uh…oh yeah. I kept thinking about you and I wish you had been there…and all that stuff. So if you can’t go tomorrow, I’ll see if I can sell the tickets because I won’t have a good time, (probably) if you’re not there. I guess I could make myself. I guess I’m just feeling sorry for myself because I’m very tired right now.

Alright, I’m not going to re-read this. I’m confident that I made an ass of myself, without re-reading. The mood of the day is getting steadily better. It’s lunch time right now, and I think I’ll go pretty soon. I may have said this already, but that was a very nice letter that you sent me. We need to muchly talk this weekend. Lunch time. (11:54)

OK. I’m back again (12:17) My Boss just told me I should have gone outside to watch the joggers with him. I can’t seem to put my thoughts into words today. OK, no more whatchafinkin’s. I understand. But I can’t explain. Maybe I’ll see ya tonight later. Whatever. BOK  (I decided to add more)  Well, here I am, sitting by myself on my afternoon break. I ate lunch by myself, too. But that’s because I’m a loner and I always will be. And I’m not feeling sorry for myself, because I’m not complaining. Just observing. These letters are not good. It’s a lot easier to say something on paper than it is in person. I think the lactic acid in milk keeps me mellow. How long did it take you to write that letter? I had to get back to work, which I did, but now I can write some more.

See you soon.

I hope. I need

 Love,

 Ross

 Letters. The power of the written word. I agree, it is a lot easier to say something on paper than it is in person. Paper doesn’t interrupt, paper doesn’t ask questions, paper doesn’t make faces or laugh at what you’re writing. Is e-mail the same? Ross and I both kept favorite letters to read and re-read in moments of quiet reflection. Has that changed in the era of the internet? ‘Blogs have their appeal, but for me pen to paper still reigns sacrosanct. Personal penmanship brings more intimacy than creative fonts. If it’s really important I write it out, although I wonder if that will change with coming generations. Will children still learn penmanship in addition to keyboarding? For my children’s sake, I hope so.

 The night after he delivered this letter, Ross took me to my very first rock concert, and bless him, he paid for the tickets. For the most part, whenever we went out, we split the cost. I paid my way with the money I made baby-sitting. I didn’t save any money, I just spent what was given to me at the end of the night. But it meant that we did a lot of things together – movies, dinners out, canoe rentals, etc.

 The concert was Tears for Fears at Kings Island. Their album, Songs from the Big Chair, had two hits “Shout” and “Everybody wants to rule the world.” Since it was my first concert, I didn’t know what to expect. I was mostly just excited and thrilled that Ross wanted me with him. We got there early enough to listen to the warm-up act; a talented and enthusiastic piano player. (I wonder whatever happened to his career?)  After the concert, we agreed that the warm-up act was much more entertaining than the headliner. Overall we enjoyed the evening as much for being together as for anything. Tears for Fears is an utterly forgettable band. I later checked out the review of the album on the Rolling Stone website. They panned it, and just about everything else about the band.

 Even so, Ross was relaxed standing on the seats. Music really moved him. He found peace in listening to the guitars, he paid attention to lyrics, analyzed baselines, and memorized drum rhythms. It was all so new to me. I was raised on symphonies and Muzak, I sang Broadway tunes in school – Rogers and Hammerstein. Sprinkle in a little old-timey bluegrass, myriad campfire songs from years of Girl Scouts, and steamboat whistles of the Mississippi, our musical worlds were so different. I was Prairie Home Companion, Dr. Demento, Cincinnati Symphony Orchestra, Go Tell Aunt Rhody on the hammered dulcimer, and David had introduced me to Pink Floyd and jazz. While Ross listened to the Who, Rush, Joe Jackson, U2, Pat Metheny, the Go-Gos, and other contemporary music.    

A few days after the concert, on a warm June afternoon, I was at Jeynes’ once again, and had promised my parents I would be home for dinner. Of course, time got away from us – we enjoyed each other’s company too much – and I was late. We drove Dad’s Pinto (okay, so I was behind the wheel) down Brayton Avenue at no less than 60 mph (speed limit 25) and I blew through the intersection at Hillcrest, and had forgotten about that pesky stop sign at Fleming Road. Upon remembering the stop sign (halfway down the hill) I slammed on the brakes. After a couple of rotations, we finally slammed against one of the crab-apple trees in the tree line. After checking to be sure we were un-hurt, I can still hear the awe in Ross’ voice, “That was cool!”

 THEN we had to face my father’s wrath. Not only were we late but I brought home a wrecked car with a dented door. My punishment was the task of getting 3 different estimates for its repair (average estimate, $700) and then NOT repairing it!  

 I drove that car off to camp in New York the following summer, and had it at college for a year. My eldest brother Jack subsequently used it years later (dent in the door intact) to move a refrigerator from New Jersey to Maine. He eventually sold the Pinto and got money for it. Well, not actual cash, but a discount off a newer vehicle.

��bz��

[theseventhhex]

INVSN Interview

INVSN

Photo by Selma Grönlund

INVSN’s latest album, ‘The Beautiful Stories’ sees the band take a more subtle path, tackling difficult themes alongside beautiful melodies and songwriting. The world that this collection of music is being released into has been shaken, but it is not yet fully shattered. ‘The Beautiful Stories’ is the soundtrack to making sense and bringing love into an increasingly maddening world. Touching on many important themes ranging from politics, to feminism, Dennis Lyxzen and company aim to offer messages laced with hope and solace… We talk to Dennis about the latest release, being a vegan and football…

TSH: As you readied ‘The Beautiful Stories’, what sort of shift in instrumentation would you say came into play?

Dennis: One of the things that was vital to this record was that we wanted to make a record that was not based on guitars. I mean there are guitars on the record, but for the first time we approached the songwriting with more percussive and rhythmic elements in mind. The record was mostly written on drums and bass, it was a very different approach to the last record we did in which we had three people playing guitar.

TSH: You were also drawn towards a different type of songwirting style…

Dennis: Yeah, I’ve been really into unconventional music. I wanted to make music that was more deconstructive.

TSH: What was the band dynamic like in the studio?

Dennis: Well, the process once we got started was really creative and quite a fun process. We ended up writing like 30 songs because we had such a good flow.

TSH: The record has connotations regarding aspects of religion and economic structures that are set up to control us. Did you feel bound to express such views?

Dennis: This type of subject matter has been on my mind for the past twenty years, ha! You cannot escape these topics! You know, coming fresh off writing a Refused record that was so abrasive and in your face, the political aspects of Refused seemed aggressive. However, with INVSN I turned a little inwards and the political aspects of INVSN are more existential. I was thinking about control and religion and where we all fit in, in a society not created for humans.

TSH: What are the origins of ‘Immer Zu'?

Dennis: Everyone in the band used to be in punk and hardcore bands and so that energy and aspect always seems to present itself and come out - it did so certainly with this track. For this song André had a demo that was really in your face and abrasive, and I jokingly said ‘we'll go full industrial’ and I ended up singing in German! It ended up working so well! But, yeah, that was a defining track for the record and it goes to show the value of happy accidents.

TSH: What does ‘This Constant War’ signify to you?

Dennis: I think it's more about current existential political ideas. When you're young you're expected to be rebellious and that’s fine. However, when you get older you want to maintain a certain level of intensity in your ideas, but society’s pressures can wear you down. So this song is about the existential side of this war that used to be an outward war when one is younger, and is now more inward. You know, I never want to get complacent and I never feel satisfied so there is this constant war within me about who I am, why I am and the way I am, therefore this song signifies the existential angst with getting older.

TSH: Do you still think being based in Sweden makes you feel alienated?

Dennis: I feel being alienated in Sweden plays to our strengths. We live in a small town in the very north of Sweden consisting of around 20,000 people. It's great because we can create pretty undisturbed from the industry and the scene and it’s good for us. I like the disconnect, you know? I’m one of those guys that every year gets invited to the Swedish Grammys and I never go, because it's a world that’s not very interesting to me. I've always foresaw music as art more than glamorous entertainment. I choose alienation, ha!

TSH: What lead you to becoming a vegan?

Dennis: I became a vegan because of hardcore and punk rock. Most of my favourite bands talked about animal rights and vegetarianism. I've always been the type of character that put myself aside and thought about animal needs. I grew up in a culture in which meat eating was part of the fabric of the society, but I became straightedge and stopped eating meat. I was a punk and as different as I could be…

TSH: How long have you been a vegan?

Dennis: I’ve been a vegan for 24 years now. When I became a vegan it was a raised middle finger to everything that was my culture. I am reaping the amazing health benefits and the moral issues are very important too. I also stopped drinking too - people thought I was out of my mind! Now, I surround myself with like-minded people. Also, another thing, some people talk about the environment and still eat meat, and if you do that, you're kind of a dick actually.

TSH: What’s downtime like for you?

Dennis: When your life is being a music artist, everything you do and relate to plays into your art. Whenever I watch a movie, or read a book or listen to a record, it's something that I collect for my music. It's hard to find pastimes not connected to music. However, I do yoga, which is really good, and I play football.

TSH: What did you make of the 2016/2017 Premier League season?

Dennis: It was an amazing season full of so much talent on display. I admired so many of the top teams this year. Obviously, Zlatan Ibrahimović is a favourite of mine; he is just so gifted and I hope he continues. He was impressive, but Man Utd have been rubbish all season, which is weird considering the players they have. Also, Liverpool is an interesting team and I like Jurgen Klopp. For me, I started liking football at a later age so I just like football and admire great players, I’m not invested in a team, except when the Swedish national team play!

TSH: How tough was it to hear about Chris Cornell’s passing?

Dennis: It’s incredibly sad. Chris had an amazing voice. It’s super-sad because he had so much creativity to give and my thoughts are with his family. I was a Soundgarden fan for a while, and with Refused we actually played with them in Italy in 2012. It was a really cool show and Chris’ voice was so powerful, it’s such a shame to lose him.

TSH: As you look ahead with INVSN, is it very much a case of remaining curious and changing the conversation each time?

Dennis: I think so. Honestly, things have been fairly easy with INVSN because we've always been a kind of small band. Whenever we've changed our approach, the stakes haven't been that high. I would say that if this record really does well, then we’d probably not make the next record completely different, ha! So far, we’ve always been in a position where our creativity can reign free and I hope it stays this way. However, even if it changes, I'd always be up for building upon new ideas.

INVSN - “Immer Zu”

The Beautiful Stories