#got happy sad during i can’t help but wonder

[satoruxx]

sorry i still can’t stop thinking about the fact that they ended the song with the just a man snippet… like he came home as a “monster” but he really is still just a man who wanted nothing more than to see his wife and kid again…….

[earthtooz]

x : CALL ME BACK : *+ﾟ

in which: ratio has been waiting for your call since you left.

warnings: FLUFF i promise, 1.6k wc, gn!reader, ratio being horribly in love and pining so badly, reader works as a space researcher, reader is a sunshine so this is basically sunshine x grump/asshole, written during his first release/ v1.6.

a/n: the way i wrote the synopsis made it sound like it was sad. maybe i'll write an angst version of the same prompt. anyways i listened to 'she calls me back' by noah kahan on loop when writing this, enjoy!

Dr. Ratio is not happy with you.

It has been three weeks and three days since he last received any sort of notification from you, any sort of indication that you were healthy and alive whilst traversing the universe. Typically, you would send daily updates of how your exploration was progressing, or new intergalactic discoveries of yours, regardless of whether or not he cared. 

(He cares. He cares more than his indifferent texts lead on. There’s a reason he always responds, after all, and it’s not just because you’ve been friends for almost two decades now.

To him, your constant messages and calls told him that you were thinking of him, and the more space he occupies in your mind, the happier he is; that is a theory he discovered years ago.

He happily listens to all of your rambles. He'll listen whilst in the middle of grading various papers or writing one of his own, he'll listen whilst eating, he'll listen to you as long as you reach out.

So where are the messages he was waiting for?)

Today is the arranged day for you to return from your new mission. Ratio has been counting down the days since he first marked it on his large desk calender, your return being the first event on his list. 

He is undeniably excited to see you, yet he feels petty enough to not make the trip down and welcome you by the docks, even if your ship’s landing zone is just outside the University.

It’s irrational of him to hold your inactivity against you. Perhaps you just encountered an inconvenience and lost your phone, or wherever you are does not have good reception to send a text halfway across the galaxy. He understands that your safety comes first on these missions, but he can’t help but feel neglected, and he curses the fragility of his ego for making him this way. 

The clock strikes another hour. From his office, Ratio cannot see the ships and come and go, but his ‘scholarly instincts’ are telling him that you are on your way. 

Not even ten minutes later, a figure comes barrelling into his office.

“There he is!” You exclaim exuberantly. It seems that the length of the mission did not erode your enthusiasm, and he’s grateful that it is as contagious as he remembers. “And here I was wondering where you were, did you dig your nose too deep in those encyclopaedias you love to memorise?”

You’re still in your research gear, hips and legs buckled to the brim with various equipment that are necessary to your work, and his heart beats guiltily at the sight. 

You came to see him as soon as you landed. He was your first destination after a tiring three and a half weeks away from home, not the comfort of your home or bed or shower; him. 

“Ha. Ha.” The purple-haired laughs dryly, getting up from his chair and rounding his desk. “Good to see you still alive.”

“What’s with the lack of energy? Didn’t you miss me, Veritas?” 

He did. More than you could ever imagine. “Of course I did.” 

Opening his arms for a hug, you all but run into his embrace, throwing your arms and anchoring yourself to the sturdiness of his torso. After not seeing you for so long, your familiar frame and warmth provides nothing but comfort. 

“Welcome home,” Ratio murmurs into your hairline. 

Your arms squeeze him tighter. “Good to be back.” 

After a few beats of silence, you step away from him and he reluctantly detaches himself from you. 

“I got you something,” you say whilst setting down your bag. Pulling out a suitcase, the purple-haired looks at you inquisitively. “It’s a chess board! I got you a new one to add to your collection!”

Ratio doesn’t bother correcting you that his ‘collection’ only has seven boards at most, but that does not negate his gratitude. 

Even whilst away, you thought of him, and that is a great victory.

“Thank you. We can play together, sometime,” he proposes.

“Oh, please. I could never beat you.”

“Giving up before you even start? That does not sound like the Y/n I know.”

“It’s not ‘giving up’, it’s picking my battles wisely. I could never best you in a game of chess, or any competition of intellect,” you laugh as if the idea itself was ridiculous.

“You shouldn’t discredit yourself based on your own assumptions. I think you make a very capable opponent.”

“I know your tricks, Veritas. Buttering me up just so you can chip at my armour and knock me down when I’m weak, have you no shame?” Your voice is light, with an air of joviality to it, and the purple-haired is enchanted. 

It seems that you don’t know him as well as you think. He finds no shame in hogging as much of your time as possible, even if it is through a game of chess that he will beat you at. He also hopes that you don’t know him well enough to hear the subtle desperation in his voice when he enquires if you’ll be leaving for another mission soon.

“I don’t believe so,” you tell him nonchalantly. “I’ll be stationed here for about two months. They’re expecting a detailed, twenty-page length report from me, so I guess I’ll be locked in my study until that’s complete.”

Ratio clicks his tongue. “Pity.”

(It’s not a pity. He gets to spend two months with you in compensation for the month that he was robbed of.)

“Not to sound self-absorbed, but why weren’t you there are the dock to pick me up?” You ask. 

“Were you disappointed?”

“A little. You’re always the first face I see whenever I come home. It was jarring to not see you amongst the crowd.”

Jealousy slashes at his chest, and he turns away from you to hide his sour expression. “I apologise, I must have lost track of the days.”

“You’re Doctor Veritas Ratio. According to your crazy schedules, there are 72 hours instead of 24 in a standard day, you never lose track.” 

Truth is a fascinating thing. By nature, it is black and white, but it’s perception is what traps fools. Humans have strived to discover an uncontested truth for as long as they have existed, but as long as opinions exist, it will constantly be revised and put together again, ambiguity heavy in the air that surrounds it. 

You, however, are even more fascinating with the way you can deconstruct him so easily.

“If you must know, I was… upset with you because you were not messaging me.”

The silence that follows is deafening.

Your laughter is even more so.

Hubris can really kill a man. Ratio does not need to consult the texts of ancient philosophers to confirm that. 

“Really?” You choke out in between cackles. “I didn’t think such menial things mattered to you!”

“Normally, they don’t.”

“So, I’m a special case then?”

“I shouldn’t need to spell it out for you.”

“Veritas!” You coo, placing your hands on either sides of his face. “I am so flattered!” 

Dr. Ratio is a renowned scholar with eight doctorate degrees. The mere mention of his name will inspire hundreds, if not, thousands, of people who have the faintest lust for academia, spreading marvel and fear amongst students and professors alike. His achievements will be engraved and celebrated by the university for centuries to come, and his classes are so notoriously hard that the passing rate is 3%. 

And yet, here he is, reduced to putty in your hands.

Perhaps that is who he is at his core. Rid from him the alabaster head, the codex, and pride, you’ll be left with a man who is ardently in love with his best friend.

“Stop it, this is ridiculous!” He mutters, hoping to salvage his image at least a little.

You listen to his demands, separating from him with a hearty laugh. “So you really do like me, that’s nice to know.”

(It is far beyond ‘like’ now. Can you come back and hold his face again?)

“I like you when you’re quiet.”

“Clearly not if you loathed my virtual silence! Which, by the way, was caused because the planet I was on had horrible reception. I really need to switch cell providers, mine doesn’t even reach to half way across the galaxy, apparently.”

“Well. I am glad you survived the three weeks without reception, it must have been a formidable challenge for you.”

“Were you worried for me?”

Of course he was. Whilst you freely roam the expansiveness of the universe, the only thing that anchors him to you across the span of light years is a message. “You should stop asking questions you know the answer to.”

“Boo, you’re no fun.” You lean down to grab the bags that lay at your feet, swinging them over one shoulder. Do you have to leave so soon? “Well, I better get going. I’m aching for a shower and a nap. Now that I have proper data and Wifi, rest assured that I will be texting you soon.”

“Cannot wait.” 

“Goodbye, Veritas! I shall see you soon!” 

‘Soon’ is a relative time frame. He can only hope that you won’t keep him waiting again.

The door clicks shut behind you, and not even five seconds later, his phone buzzes with a call.

“Sorry!” Your voice greets from the other end of the line. “Was just testing if my reception actually worked.”

“There is a reason your day job is a Space Researcher and not a comedian.”

“Can’t you at least laugh? Let’s grab dinner tomorrow at half past six, make yourself free, Veritas!” 

You hang up before he can even get a word in, and he’s left to stare at the blank screen of his phone with an idiotic smile.

Everything’s alright when you call him back.

© EARTHTOOZ 2024, do not steal, translate, repost my fics and do not recommend my fics onto any other site.

[dontbesoweirdkira]

Hello! I was wondering if you could do a small request? I was thinking of platonic Yandere Dick and batsib where batsib is getting harassed(hope I spelled it right) at school or online but can’t find Jason or the others so finally gives in and asks Dick for help on how to handle the situation?

A/N: Yes, ofc! Thank you for requesting. I was originally never going to post the og headcanon because i thought people wouldn't like a darker take on him. I'm so happy you guys do. its actually dick just cyber bullying you into coming to him loll

Warnings: concepts of online harrassment, but it's mainly fluff.

Requests: open 24/7

Masterlist

"Sweetie, don't cry. Tell your big brother what happened, okay?" Dick's voice cooed as he used his thumb to gently wipe away your tears.

This wasn't a position you imagine yourself to be in. You never figured you'd be coming to Dick for anything. Ever. Let alone comfort. For the past few months of being in Wayne's house, you've avoided your older brother like the plague. There wasn't any circumstance you wanted to be around him, you didn't particularly like him for your own reasons. Jason was the one you found the most comfort in. He made you feel safe and at ease unlike Dick.

But Jason wasn't here right now. He and the others were taking their shift on patrol and they wouldn't be back at least until the sun rose. Dick was the only one home and available to help with the situation at hand.

~~~~

You had recently started up a social media account with much persuasion from your sibling, Barbra. It was just supposed to be something wholesome to better connect with the other siblings as it was a frequency they used. You weren't too fond of the whole thing, it was slightly anxiety inducing but you agreed to make them happy. They felt bad about sharing so many family photos without you being as they were all proud to show you off.

Unexpectedly, you kind of got into it. You started spending quite a few hours scrolling posts and sharing videos to your siblings, even deciding to make a few of your own...not thinking much of it.

It was great and all of the feedback was positive, mainly being from your sibling or school friends. It was a fun and rather safe escape for you to enjoy on your downtime.

That was until you finally decided to check your laptop after a few days away. To your surprise, lots of new notifications flooded your inbox. Maybe your post went viral or something, you excitedly thought to yourself.

The excitement quickly died down after reading through every comment and message you received during your hiatus. Copious amounts of vile content flooded your eyes. Most of them attacked your appearance or the fact you were 'just another pitiful orphan'. But nothing disturbed you like the dm you received that was filled with death threats and altered photos of you.

Mixed feelings of terror, anxiety and sadness overtook your body. You were never one to cry much but this, this did something to you. The only thing you wanted was to be held. Your safe space was ripped from you and turned into a heinous landfill, you felt so violated. You knew that person was only behind a screen but what if they were coming for you? What if it was an enemy of your family? You weren't nearly as trained or half as capable as your siblings and this person probably knew that. What if they're not around and that person captures you..

You didn't want to die. You didn't want to be their target….

~~~~~

You could sense the blood boiling beneath Grayson's skin as told him all that happened. For once in your life you seen his smile drop and his eyes growing dark., his sky blue eyes were nearly a deep black. He couldn't stop the fury from seeping into his vein as he thought about all the ways to get his revenge on the person who made you like this.

He never wanted to see his baby sister in this state, he didn't like that you couldn't enjoy yourself. He felt so guilty, this was his fault. He gave the green light to Babs about the social media thing when she brought it up to him. How could he be so stupid? Why didn't he think about the possibility of something like this?

It was supposed to be something to get you out of your shell and closer with them, not a breeding ground for degenerate fuckers like that.

He was silent for a while, entrapped in his own mind and anger before you tugged on his shirt.

"..Dick, please help me. I'm so scared. I really don't want to die. What am i going to do?" Your words were almost inaudible as you choked over them. The few lone tears turned into a heavy stream. You needed him to make this all go away. It was too much for you to handle alone.

Your plea for his help snapped him out of his thoughts. Dick's heart nearly crumbling at the cracks in your voice. He loved you so much and making sure you knew you were safe was the most important thing. The plotting could wait, there was plenty of time to take care of them. Softening his face, he flashed you his pretty smile, and took your hands in his.

"Do you think your older brother, Dick, would ever let them come through these doors and hurt you?"

You shook your head and rubbed at your puffy, red eyes.

"My sweet birdie. You have to know as long as i'm living, you'll be safe."

Dick hesitantly opened his arms out for a hug, not sure if you'd be willing to accept it this time. To his surprise, you did. Practically throwing yourself into his embrace, you wrapped you arms around his neck and sobbing in the crook of his neck.

You tightly held onto him as you nuzzled your head as deeper into it. Maybe you were wrong in your judgement of him?,,,or maybe it was the heat of the moment, but something about this was actually…nice. You never had a hug that felt as warm and protecting as this was now. There was just something so precious about the he handled you with so much care. It was as if you were made out of some kind of delicate material.

A feeling of regret rushed your body as you thought back to all the times you avoided and othered him. Was this what you were missing all those times?

You could've been getting love like this but you willingly rejected it all. Stupid.

"...I'm sorry,,,"

A curious hum left his voice as he wondered what you could be referring to. None of this was your fault nor was coming to him any sort of burden.

",,,for y'know.”

You could feel his head gently tilt to the side as he was still confused as to what you meant.

“I've been a bad sister to you, dick. I’m so sorry.” Your shaky voice was pitched high as you fought against your tears.

Shaking his head, he rubbed circles on your back.

Richard held his own breath for a moment, processing the words you just said. It was almost unbelievable to hear those words escaping from your mouth. Almost as unbelievable for you to finally be in his arms like this, at your most vulnerable. A fuzziness started in the depths of his stomach and exploded his body in bliss.

This was a long awaited feeling he so desperately had been craving. At that moment, all of his patience was worth it. All he ever wanted was to be your safety net, your best friend and he’s finally getting it. He wanted you to hug him like this forever. He wanted you to be safe right here in his arms. This was everything he could ask for.

Pay offs like this confirms he chose right in prioritizing his family over everything. His tendencies weren’t indeed crazy but necessary. He’s the backbone of the bats.

Dick’s muscular arms tightening in their embrace, gave you a nice squeeze.

"If you were a bad sister, i wouldn't love you as much as i do. The world doesn't deserve an angel like you, neither do i."

Dick breaks the hug and puts your hands in his once more. A soft kiss is planted on your forehead and there's a beat that passes as he's observing you. His smile is wider than ever. To him, you're the most perfect sibling he could ever ask for.

"I'll do whatever it takes, even bending a few rules, if that means you can sleep peacefully. I’m your nightwing."

[nadvs]

blurb of hbd reader and rafe with their baby girl please 🥺

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

continuation of this fic & inspired by this ask

Your eyelids flitter open, offering you a view of the white ceiling of the private hospital room you’ve been in all night. The way the light spills in through the slitted blinds tells you the sun must have just risen.

“…never feel sad or lonely,” you hear Rafe say, low and hushed.

You turn your head slightly to see your husband standing by the window, holding your bundled newborn against his chest, her eyes shut.

“And you’ll never have to wonder if we love you. You’ll know,” he mumbles.

Your heart feels both happy and sad as you overhear the words he’s whispering to your daughter, promising that she’ll never feel an absense of love like he did most of his life.

Rafe glances over to see you awake in the inclined bed, the blankets he put on you still draped over you.

“Did I wake you up?” he says, brows furrowing in concern.

“No,” you say. “I think it’s some kind of mom instinct. I keep waking up to check on her.”

He beams at you, already sure you’re going to be an amazing mother. He kisses the top of his sleeping baby’s head as he slowly walks to you, settling on the foot of the bed.

“How’d you make this?” he says in pure awe, gently lifting your daughter a bit higher on his chest.

“You helped,” you tease. “I don’t know. It’s crazy. I can’t believe she’s finally here.”

“You did such a good job,” Rafe says softly.

He thought he couldn’t possibly love you more, but the way you went through the pains of pregnancy and birth just so you two could start a family has given him an even stronger sense of admiration for you.

“Thank you,” you say tiredly.

“I’m going to give you both the best life,” he promises.

“I know,” you say with a smile. “You already are.”

The past 24 hours have been an exhausting whirlwind and you feel your eyelids getting heavy again.

“Sleep,” Rafe tells you. “I’ll wake you up when it’s time to feed her.”

“Okay,” you whisper, already dozing off.

Rafe looks down at his daughter, then his wife, and is sure he’s living somebody else’s life because he can’t possibly be lucky enough to really be sitting here.

Rafe’s mind drifts to what his mom would be doing right now. Sometimes, during big moments like these, he likes to imagine that she’s still alive, to daydream about what she’d be doing or saying in a world where her life wasn’t taken from her too soon.

In this case, he knows she’d be bringing food to the hospital, taking care of her daughter-in-law, holding her grandchild with tears in her eyes.

Rafe rubs his daughter’s small back, feeling her move with little breaths, thinking about how he’ll tell her all about the woman her grandmother was.

The pure, infinite love he feels for his baby is overwhelming, and when he realizes this is exactly what his mother felt for him, his throat tightens.

It’s like this little girl was sent to him from his mother as a testament of a parent’s love, a reminder that she always adored him, that she would never blame him for what happened.

Rafe got a second chance at life that night in the car. His mother deserved one, too, but she didn’t get it, so he tries to appreciate life enough for the both of them. It’s what she would want.

His baby stirs gently in his arms and he kisses the top of her head again as he looks at you. He’s afraid he’ll never be able to give to you what you’ve given to him. The love and grace and patience you’ve beautified his life with.

But he’ll never stop trying. He swears it. When it is his time to leave this earth, he’ll go knowing he gave you and your child everything. All of him.

[zvdvdlvr]

Why’d You Have to Wait?

🔥 - synopsis. You get kidnapped on a case. Aaron’s coping mechanism? Self isolation. But when you’re recovering, Aaron wonders if staying away from you is the right thing to do. Jack convinces him anyway. Are things too far gone for Aaron to fix?

🔥 - warnings. Non descriptive torture. Scars. Burns. Very vaguely described mental issues. Slow burn. Friends ro enemies to lovers? Sad hotch. Angst. No happy ending.

🔥 - author’s note. Doing a part two. Hopefully this doesnt flop :)

Aaron had dreams about it now. They were so vivid- lifelike and real. Every time he had them he woke up in a cold sweat, heaving in the bathroom as tears dripped slowly down his face.

He hadn’t gone to the hospital to see you. In fact, Aaron hadn’t seen you since the day you almost died. He rode in the ambulance, but tore himself away from the hospital as he watched the doctors wheel you into the operating room. Your blood had stained his hands, face, and arms for days. Every time the white spots danced in his vision after emptying the contents of his stomach, he swears he can still see the glossy red liquid drip off his fingers.

You were well like. Not only by the team but by Strauss. She had given the team the time off to help y/n recover: sit in her room after another surgery, cheer for her during physical therapy.

Jack loved having time to see his dad after school, but he knew something was wrong after consistently hearing him pad to the kitchen during the middle of the night.

Tonight was no different.

Jack sat up in his bed and rubbed his eyes. He blinked owlishly around the room and stood up. The little Hotchner slowly followed the light to the kitchen and saw his daddy lean over the sink. “Daddy?”

Aaron turned his head and tried to smile at Jack. Aaron knew he probably looked a mess. “Hey buddy. Let’s get you back to bed.”

Before Aaron could set down set down his water cup, Jack crawled up the seat and watched his dad over the counter. “What’s wrong, daddy?”

“I just can’t sleep,” Aaron shrugged, facing Jack with his arms crossed. “Why do you think something’s wrong?”

Jack looked at Aaron as if he had grown two heads. “You get up in the night a lot, daddy. And your eyes are red. You cough a lot too.“

Hotch wanted to laugh. Of course Jack knew something was wrong- he always knew. “Yeah. You’re right, kiddo.”

“You yell when you sleep sometimes too. What happened to y/n, daddy? She doesn’t come see me anymore.”

Aaron shuddered as he inhaled. Smart boy. “She got really hurt, buddy. It’s bad. I guess I just… get scared thinking about her getting hurt,” Aaron admits, feeling his heart beat faster in his chest.

Jack nodded. “Can we go see her?”

“I- I don’t think we should. She’s still getting better.”

Jack furrowd his eyebrows and tilted his head. “But I miss her.”

“I do t- I bet she misses you, too, Jack, but I don’t know how she’s doing. She might still-“

Jack sighed. “But daddy, she’d be so happy to see me!”

Aaron sighed. As much as he selfishly wanted to see you, he couldn’t. He’d do something he wasn’t proud of- embarrass himself, ruin his reputation of being a mentally and emotionally tough boss, ruin your friendship… No. Aaron couldn’t go by himself, but Jack could go with him. Why hadn’t Aaron thought of it before?

“Okay,” Aaron relented. A smile tugged at his lips when Jack’s face lit up. He scrambled off his chair and collided into Aaron’s legs and squeezed.

“Can I sleep with you tonight, daddy? Aunt Jess always stays with me when I have a nightmare.”

Aaron bent down and picked Jack up and nodded. “Yeah, buddy. Let me brush my teeth again.”

Jack wrapped his arms around his dad’s neck and squeezed, as big of a hug his little body could give.

— 🔥

The days were all a blur for you. Now that you were all fucked up, nothing felt right anymore. Second defree burns crawled up the calf of your left leg. Small cuts littered your entire body, scarring and twisting your skin. The worst part was the long, twisting scar that started on your cheek about two inches away from your ear and pulled down to your collarbone.

The unsub, Barney MacMillian, was a sadist. A stupid fucking sadist. He thought he was punishing you for hunting him when he kidnapped and tortured you.

You know the team tried- they really really did try- to cheer you up, to get you back. But the fact that you now considered yourself a monster and how you started to believe the things MacMillian had whispered in your ear as he tore you apart, layer by layer.

Derek genuinely thought your scar was badass, but learned not to bring it up. Penelope just kept rehashing everything- something you had eventually told her to atop doing. Prentiss was cautious, testing the waters. But she eventually got back into a rhythm with you as your best friend. JJ didn’t do anything wrong, she was just really nice- too nice? Spencer was… himself. And you couldn’t thank him enough for just staying him, recitinf facts about burns and scars, knives and blood loss. It was morbid, sure, but you were always close with him and the way his brain worked.

Rossi was the one that kept you together through it all, though. He had conversations with you, long past visiting hours. He talked with you about anything and everything and somehow knew exactly what you needed to hear or talk about. But he kept making excuses for Aaron.

Aaron. The romantic feelings you kept trying to flush away turned into hurt every time Rossi’s eyes flickered away from yours when you asked about him. But you knew now. He didn’t care. He never would. That’s why he didn’t show. It’s the only plausible explanation of why he wouldn’t show up, shoot you a text, something.

So you turned your hurt into anger and stopped asking, ignoring the way your heart would drop to your stomach and how the acid in your stomach churned eveey time you heard his name.

You already had your resignation documenta stored neatly in a magazine in the second table in the nightstand to your right. You were done with it all.

— 🔥

That’s why you felt tears prick in your eyes when you saw Jack Hotchner leap into the room. His little eyes scoured your face, eyes dragging down the healing skin on your face. You heard Aaron’s footfalls stop short at the door. Your jaw clenched and you stared at Jack, waiting for him to start crying and ask to leave.

But he didn’t. He just smiled and leapt into your arms, completely unaware of the physical pain in your leg and body. He just wrapped his arms and legs around you.

You sat still, eyes looking at Rossi, who smiled at you. You hadn’t yet looked at Aaron and didn’t even want to. Carefully you wrapped your arms around Jack’s back, ignoring how fast the tears left your eyes.

Jack pulled back and looked at you with a smile that faded the second he saw your tears. In all of your time (almost 10 years) at the BAU, Jack had only seen you cry once. And that was during a movie. 

“I thought coming to see you what make you happy,” he sad, voice sad. “Why are you crying?”

You smiled at him, sniffling pitifully. “I’m not sad, little J. I am really happy to see you,” you said. You hoped Aaron would hear the sharp undertone in your voice. Judging by Rossi’s huff of a laugh, he did.

“Oh! Well, I brought you stuff. I know you like the Black Widow because she’s really cool, so I brought you a coloring book,” Jack explained as he brandished his backpack full of stuff. You listensed intently, only looking up when Rossi got your attention and nodded to the door to signal him leaving.

Jack kept talking and you were overjoyed to listen. He was a pleasent little man, making your time more enjoyable. He opened up the coloring book he bought and started coloring after giving you a Beanie Baby he had that you mentioned you liked. He also got you a necklace- that Aaron no doubt spent a pretty penny for- that had your birthstone set in it. Jack watched you carefully as you opened it, and he put it on with his chubby fingers. You didn’t tell him that you would have to take it off soon after he left so it didn’t kill you when you slept. Hospital policy or something.

Soon after you finished your own coloring page featuring the Black Widow and Tony Stark making a hero landing, Jack turned on the T.V. and fell asleep.

“Hey,” Aaron said finally.

You nodded. “Hi boss.”

Aaron bit his lip. You stared forward, hand threading through Jack’s hair. Aaron felt his heart clenching in his chest. He didn’t know how you were gonna react when he came by, but he didn’t expect this- this silent treatment. He didn’t really blame you though. He wanted more than anything to make it up to you, to get you smiling again, but he knew the distance was probably better. For him at least.

“Y/n-“ Aaron started.”

You cut him off with. “Jack’s asleep, sir. It would be best not to wake him.”

Sir. You only called him sir if you were mad. Aaron swallowed. He knew he fucked up. Would he ever be able to fix his mistake, bring the old you back? He pondered the questions as he leaned back in his chair and watched the television show Jack chose before he fell asleep.

— 🔥

“Y/n is getting sent home today,” David’s voice crackled through the phone. “We wanted to take her out to dinner, something nice. Are you coming?”

Aaron sat at the kitchen table, checking over Jack’s homework. Jack himself was sitting a couple feet away on the couch. “Probably not. I have Jack.” 

Rossi scoffed on the other line. “She loves Jack and he loves her. Bring him with you.”

“I don’t know,” Aaron sighed. He rested his head in his hands and closed his eyes. “Dave, she hates me.”

Silence. Rossi exhaled and shook his head. “She doesn’t hate you, but you’re giving her a lot of reasons to. Clean yourself up and meet us all at the address Garcia’ll send you. 6:00. Be there, Aaron. If not for her…” he trailed off, considering his next words carefully. “Then for Jack.”

— 🔥

David convinced you all to wait until ordering.

But when 6:45 rolled around and Aaron didn’t show, you just clenched your jaw and ordered a neat whiskey.

[just-some-little-lads]

My Love, Like Winter, is Eternal

Summary: You find you can't sleep, and your partner resting right next to you listens to your late-night thoughts.

Word Count: 1.3k

Tags: SFW, Fluff, Second Person POV, gn! reader.

It’s easy to forget what lies beneath a frost. When the world is coated in so much snow, one might lose memory of the blooms in spring. Most people think of winter as this harsh and cruel season. It often comes hand-in-hand with negative metaphors like death or apathy or the end of any good thing. There was a time when you thought much the same. Now…you can’t help but almost feel bad for winter- for snow. There’s so much warmth there that goes unnoticed.

Poetic thoughts like these came easy to you in the early hours of the morning. Especially during nights where you couldn’t sleep. Maybe that’s why you found yourself finding feeling sad for an environmental passage of time of all things. Well…you had to give yourself some slack. There was a reason why snow had such a loving space in your heart; why you found yourself telling your coworkers who dared complain about the cold all the wonderful things you could do in the snow. Even after all the odd glances you got most times. A noble task, you would tell yourself. One might call you a…polar protector? A Snow Spokesperson! A Blizzard Bodyguard! A—

A large hand covered your face, cutting you free from your thoughts. After successfully catching your attention, the hand moved back to the body it belonged to. “You’re thinking too loudly…” Voice low, tone slightly slurred with half-consciousness, Zayne brought a thumb and forefinger up to rub at bleary eyes before pinching the bridge of his nose.

You felt a bit guilty for waking him up, knowing he’d be heading back to the hospital in a few hours. “You can read my thoughts?”

A huff of a single chuckle escaped him as he turned on his side towards you. As he spoke, his arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you toward him. “I think I have a few years to go before I can read your thoughts, but I can read your body language. Tossing and turning, fidgeting hands, rapid breaths. Symptoms of someone far too awake. What’s keeping you up?” A note of concern seeped into his tone. He kept you close while fixing and straightening some wild strands of your bed-hair. Based off his smile, you could tell you looked a bit more on the disheveled side. Something he was all too happy to fix. Meanwhile, he still looked as refined as ever. Gorgeous, like a statue chiseled from ice plucked from heavenly mountain-tops. Or perhaps that was just the rose-colored glasses talking. You found yourself still falling head-over-heels for him, and crushing like you hadn’t been together for a while. “Hey…” Zayne’s smile faded, his hand moving from your hip to your cheek. Apparently, he’d taken you staring at him in silence as some sort of hesitation. “Talk to me. Is something wrong?”

Well, now you felt a bit sheepish. Zayne was probably thinking you were plagued by some kind of stress. “Just thinking…about snow.”

“Snow?” he asked, incredulous that something so simple was keeping you awake, almost looking more worried. “Don’t tell me you’re making winter plans already?”

“Not really…”

The mattress shifted as he propped his head up on his elbow and sighed. His forefinger began to trace the outline of your face. “Penny for your thoughts? I won’t be able to sleep if you continue being so cryptic.”

You groaned a bit, not able to handle the thought of him getting no rest just because of your silly mind. “I’m just thinking about how sad it is that the cold gets such a bad rap.” As you explained that, you noticed how his face contorted into a mixed expression of confusion and amusement. You gave him time to speak, ready to hear him laugh or tell you to put you and your crazy mind to bed. Nothing was said by him, seemingly waiting to hear your intense thoughts at three in the morning. “It’s always talked about like some heartless, lifeless thing, but it’s not! Ice cream is cold and it’s one of my favorite things! In winter, you can wear cute coats and scarves, warm up with hot chocolate, and snuggle up by the fire. Plus, snow is so pretty. When it falls…it’s so comforting. I just… I wish people saw all the good in it that I do.” You glanced up at him, still waiting for him to roll his eyes.

Instead, he only looked at you softly- lovingly. With a little tug, he pulled you closer, lying back down while tucking your head under his chin. “I see. So, you think winter is sad that so many people dislike it?” He adjusted the blanket around you both, making sure your heads were comfortably on the pillows.

For some reason, you felt like crying. Maybe it was just because you were sleep deprived. Or perhaps it was because you tended to forget how safe of a space Zayne was. He’d joke with you, follow along with the bits you came up with, even listen to whatever you had to say running on four hours of sleep like he’d also gotten a degree in therapy. “I bet it gets lonelier than the other seasons…”

“Hm.” He closed his eyes, and for a moment you thought he’d fallen back asleep. When he spoke again, his voice lowered, his face nuzzling your head ever so slightly. “I think…that the snow is content enough being loved by you.” Zayne’s body was warm. Perfectly so. His hand ran up and down your back in slow hypnotizing rubs.

“I’m just one person in a world with millions of people… It deserves more than just me.” You were starting to feel drowsy now, eyelids going heavy at a rapid pace. A little moan rumbled in your throat as you shifted about to get comfortable, turning on your other side so Zayne was curled against your back. His presence was like a soothing blanket, your body enveloped and protected from things that might do you harm. Ever your valiant healer even outside of battle.

A kiss pressed into the back of your shoulder as you slotted yourself against him, fitting like a perfect puzzle piece. “I don’t think it’s greedy,” he whispered softly. “It sees the way you rush outside to greet it when it’s snowing, even if you’re not wearing something warm. It’s happy to take on the role of being cold so your hot chocolate tastes that much better, feeling the heat run down your throat…into your stomach…sinking down into your toes.” The way he was speaking was slow and purposefully melodic, like the narration of those resting meditation videos. He was trying to put you to sleep. Zayne took a deep breath, like he was minutes away from falling asleep himself, forcing himself to stay awake until he knew you were at peace. “It’s glad to make the world quieter so you can find yourself drifting off much easier.” He kissed the back of your head, resting his face against your body with a large exhale.

For a moment, you listened to the soft sounds of his breathing, staring at the subtle rays of moonlight seeping through past the curtains. All the strange anxiety that had kept you up melted away. You had to admit to yourself that you weren’t quite worried about the winter at all. But you weren’t sure where the doubt came from. Here he was, making you feel loved like you never had before. “You think so?”

“I know so. The winter will…always be there for you. Forever.” A small waver of emotion filled his voice.

“And my love, like winter, will be eternal for you…”

With one last squeeze, he laughs. “Oh? And here I was thinking we were talking about snow, but I’m flattered.” Words laced with mirth, he tried to pass off that he wasn’t aware of the true meaning behind your worries the whole time. You jabbed him a bit in the ribs with your elbow. In return, he used his Evol to press an icy cold hand against your back.

In the end, you both ended up not getting much sleep at all anyway, but neither of you cared in the slightest.

[rishiguro]

hi rin!! i was wondering if i could request a jjk angst fic? (specifically nanami but you can include whoever you want)

your “when they throw their wedding ring” really hit a nerve so here i am begging for more hahaha (i’m 19 btw!)

BUSY THINKING ABOUT EX HUSBAND!NANAMI

a/n: is this the place to mention that i also started working on a full nanami angst fic?

ex husband!nanami who wasn’t happy when you told him that you wanted a divorce, but only sighed before nodding and telling you that he‘ll agree to whatever conditions you give him.

ex husband!nanami who only hesitated once the papers were in front of him, simply needing his signature on them.

ex husband!nanami who tries to rationalize his feelings away and keeps telling himself that you simply were nothing more than a chapter in his book.

ex husband!nanami who seemed to move on so simply, acting like nothing was wrong to begin with and continued to live his life just like he did before — like you were never there to begin with.

ex husband!nanami who only months later realizes how much he regrets not fighting for you harder, how he loathes the cold side of the bed on which you always slept and how he has so much space in his closet now.

ex husband!nanami who realizes that he only felt joy in his chores and errands was because he got to do them with you.

ex husband!nanami who still buys your favorite kind of cereal, fruit and snacks and doesn’t even notice it until he’s unpacking everything at home, putting them away with a heavy heart, because he doesn’t even like them.

ex husband!nanami who refuses to throw away the last pictures, still keeping your wedding portrait in the top drawer of his nightstand.

ex husband!nanami who acts civil and distant whenever someone mentions you, yet tries to change the topic as quickly as possible because talking about you is just too painful.

ex husband!nanami who always keeps his wedding rin in his pocket wherever he goes.

ex husband!nanami who can’t help but think about you every night before he falls asleep, missing the times where you would cuddle him to fall asleep — and now he feels like he can barely sleep without your warmth.

ex husband!nanami who still dreams of you at night, reliving both the happiest and saddest moments during your relationship.

ex husband!nanami who always wakes up drenched in sweat after, with his chest rising and falling rapidly as he stares down on his blanket for minutes with sad eyes.

ex husband!nanami who wants you back desperately but keep his distance seeing that you moved on — silently hoping that maybe one day he can do too.

reblog to show some love

[iloveriddles]

Imaginal Disk Storyline + Lore.

Okay, this is all opinion and my theories.

From What I can tell, “Imaginal Disk” is about two people: our protagonist, True, and a sub-protagonist of sorts, Ghost.

True lives in a house away from town. All she can do in her house is watch TV and journal.

True hates herself, and has never felt loved, or really sees love anywhere. She is very depressed. She can’t bear to look at herself in the mirror, even. She hates the way she looks, as we see on the mirror from imaginaldisk.world in True’s room. Her face is all distorted and swirled if you click it.

She never sleeps because she “spends her days chasing clouds and counting sheep, waiting for the night to creep”.

She does this because in the field outside her house, during night, a mirror appears and in it she sees a person who looks like her. This is Ghost. I am not sure if this happens every single night, or just some, but True seems dedicated to talking to Ghost at any chance she can take.

Ghost sleeps every night well and wakes up to be in the field, opposite to True. At her side of the mirror, it’s daytime.

I know their names because of the journals in True’s bedroom, where the lyrics for Fear, Sex are handwritten with the name “Ghost” at the top, and the lyrics for Killing Time are written on the first page with with the name “True”.

Ghost, to True, is beautiful in every way. She’s pretty, she’s perfect. She is loved and happy, and True isn’t. Ghost is the “Angel on a satellite”, I am 99% sure. True, from speculation, lives vicariously in a way through Ghost. She wishes she could be Ghost, and it kills her. There’s even symbolism here with Ghost’s lover in the Death & Romance video being made of light and featureless. It’s like exactly what True wants, to “be pined for” as she says in Killing Time (“I don’t care if I don’t sleep // but someone better pine for me”), but she can’t imagine by whom because she has no love interest. She just wants faceless love. She wants to feel like she matters in some way, like she is worthy of time. “There’s always time for killing, but never time for me. It only takes a minute”, she sings in Killing Time.

It’s so sad =( she’s right, though. That’s how it feels. People have time to waste and do nothing, but not time to help their close ones when they’re in a low place. It’s neither party’s fault, but still “True”.

True’s room is also the same layout as Ghost’s, but opposite. I think they are maybe versions of themselves from parallel universes or something like that. There is also implication that they start seeing through each other’s eyes in intervals, and we see this a little at the end of the Death & Romance video when she touches the Disk. I think their brains are connected in some way.

As mentioned, True hates herself and is miserable. I think this is why she gets the Imaginal Disk. We know she watches TV, so she probably saw the ad “True Blue Interlude” which is between Killing Time and Image. Image is her getting diskinserted and going to The Doctor. In the advertisement, it seems to be singing to her. It even says her name, “True”. It’s advertised as being a next stage and phase, it’s like the perfect form of escaping for True. She doesn’t want to be herself, she wants to be “Pure” and a “better her”. I also wonder if True Blue Interlude has hypnotic properties in canon, or anything like that. It’s interesting how this changes Image so much if you know the story. “I’m the best you’ve got, *true* or not?”

We are missing music videos so I am not certain about some stuff. They said on Instagram that they’re making one for Tunnel Vision, which I am 90% certain it will be another True song. True’s eyes do the weird blink thing in the Fear, Sex music video. Also, in “That’s My Floor” the camera zooms into her eyes and she LITERALLY has “Tunnel Vision”.

Also from the “That’s My Floor” music video, we know that after getting her disk True wears red like The Doctor instead of her blue, and starts assisting him in diskinserting. There is so much speculative stuff here right now. For example, I wonder if The Doctor is supposed to be True’s universe’s version of the glowing light guy that Ghost is with. I don’t know, but it changes the songs A LOT if you know that the lyrics are in character. Some songs are Ghost songs, and others are True songs.

In “That’s My Floor”’s music video she accidentally kills the people dancing with her indirectly because she gave them the disks (speculation) so she runs away. This lines up with “The Outskirts” from the website. It says to “walk down and atone for your sins”, also also that “the weight of your guilt should be slowing you down more than that”.

I think it’s about True’s guilt for all she’s done with the Imaginal Disk. When it zooms into her stomach camera? It shows what I think is the reality she actually wants. She wants to remove their disks; but she doesn’t. I also don’t know if Ghost is actually there, or if she’s hallucinating/imagining her to be.

“Love Is Everywhere”, is a Ghost song. She says to “look through the holes in the sky” to “find Love”. I also think Cry For Me might be a Ghost song, because she says “Think of Love and you’ll remember me”. I wonder if she’s going to be killed off or something. This would be foreshadowed by “DEATH and romance”. Maybe The solid light guy (whom I assume went into The Cocoon at The Outskirts) dies, so Ghost does too? Not sure. Speculation.

In Angel on a Satellite, a song I believe to be about Ghost, True sings “A thousand eyes turn to stone and monochrome // surprise, surprise // they turn to smile at the same time”

Followed by

“That’s why I don’t look up // That’s why I’m always dancing”

I think this is symbolism for her depression and inability to feel love.

The “eyes” can’t feel; they only watch. They symbolize people around her. They’re “stone” and “monochrome” because they are cold and reflective onto her, these represent people in her life that she can’t show her misery around. Like being depressed and having to hide it from your family, or friends that say “I’m always here to listen” but do not mean it in the slightest. She’s “always dancing” because she’s masking her loneliness and self-hate for those watching her.

True has never left love. We know she doesn’t truly. She sings about it multiple times. I think this part of She Looked Like Me! Is about Ghost

“Her hair lifted as she stood still

Right there in the light And she felt like a dream

I didn't know what to think

She looked like me

We stood mirrored 'til I leaned in And then you know what she did

She shot at me like an earthbound bullet

And then she wrapped her hands around my neck and I felt love

Just ordinary love

Let me hold you in my arms

Oh, love, that familiar old drug”

I don’t think Ghost literally strangled her, but instead it’s more poetic symbolism.

In Angel on a Satellite, True sings “I swear that through your eyes everything is brighter all the time // ‘cause when I see me through your eyes I love me, so don’t leave my side // you always see the sky, angel on a satellite”

Ghost “sees the sky” by seeing and feeling love. She literally “looks up”. She’s optimistic, True isn’t. She can’t look up.

Another little detail I’ve noticed is how in Love Is Everywhere, I presume Ghost sings “Look inside through the sky all around us” in the same melody that True sings “Angel on a satellite, glad you found us” in “Feeling Diskinserted?”

I think that the album will end with True going to the cocoon and becoming her ACTUAL “Purest self”. If you spell “Imaginal Disk” with a “c” instead of a “k” at the end, it’s literally a part of a pupa. The Imaginal disc turns into portions of a bug’s exoskeleton after it emerges from its metamorphosis. So, on a literal level, the real Imaginal disk that changes you was THE COCOON ALL ALONG. Maybe the Doctor is doing a shady internet scam trick where you change the URL by one letter and pass it off.

The detail here is so interesting. Even down to their names True is literally her True self. She can’t be anyone else. It’s reality. Ghost on the other hand is like the Ghost of everything True wants to be.

I also noticed: The Doctor’s laughter from Fear, Sex plays in the bridge of Cry For Me. I bet we will get a music video for it. I wonder what is happening with the Ghost and aliens storyline.

Anyways, I have so much to say about this. I have more even than this. We are missing music videos so I will be back. I also have to talk about the alien observation plot, but that needs more pondering.

[lucywritesagain]

Broken mirrors

꒰ა ˚₊ ✧・┈﹕Loki masterlist ꒰ ᐢ｡- ༝ -｡ᐢ ꒱ Navigation ﹕┈・𐑺 ‧₊˚໒꒱

Please note that this story is a repost from my old blog @lucywrites02.

Summary: During one of his depressive episodes Loki wonders if someone like him would ever be worthy of you. Will your love be enough to keep him alive?

Word count: 1.1k

Loki was standing in front of  the mirror that was in his room. He was supposed to accompany you to Tony's birthday party but here he was, blue skin and red eyes, watching his reflection with disgust on his  face. He couldn’t understand why you would ever want to be with him. He promised  he would talk to you if he was having another depressive episode again but you were so excited to attend this party. He didn’t want you to stay because of him. Since the two of you got together all he has wanted was to make you happy. But would a monster like him ever be able to  make you happy?

“Nothing but another stolen relic”  

“Your birthright was to die”

Those words were all he could think about at the moment. The sadness and hopelessness  he felt only seconds ago turned into anger.  Loki looked at himself one more time before shattering the mirror into small pieces. He had no idea when that happened. He can’t remember when his fist decided to crush into it. Seeing his blue hand covered in blood Loki felt empty. He was so caught up in this moment he didn’t even hear when the door opened.

“Loki! I was looking for y-” seeing Loki’s blue face you stopped in your tracks and went completely silent. You then noticed the pieces of, what you assumed, used to be his mirror.

 You knew he was a Jotun but you have never seen him in this form before. Loki didn’t have any time to hide as you barged through the door. He had no time to cover his face or change back to his other form. It was too late for that. Not wanting to see as you fled from the room in terror, Loki closed his eyes and held his breath. But that never happened. You didn't scream nor have you called anyone to help you. He never meant for you to see this side of him. This beast he tried so hard to hide from you. And he ruined it all. You have seen it, there is no going back now. He tried to say something but no words would come out of the gods mouth. Will you leave him, now that you know that he’s a monster? Will you ever speak to him again? The trickster didn’t even notice when the tears started pouring out of his eyes. He couldn’t live knowing you hate him. 

“I didn’t mean to barge in like that,” you said softly “I’m sorry if I scared you” he looked at you confused. Why were you apologizing to HIM? Loki was the one who should be begging for  forgiveness on his knees.

 You knew how hard it was for him to accept his heritage. Wanting to comfort him you put your hand on his shoulder but Loki jumped away from you as if your touch was burning his skin.

“Please don’t touch me! I don’t want to hurt you” he shouted and walked backwards until his back hit the wall. “I-I never meant for you to see me li-like this. I-I’m so sorry”

 Your heart broke when you noticed how terrified he was. His red eyes were glassy because of the tears and his hands were shaking. The trickster started to feel dizzy and he couldn’t breathe properly. He hadn’t had a panic attack in a while and this one felt particularly bad. Noticing the sudden change of his body language you quickly figured out what was happening. The god collapsed on the floor and hid his head between his knees. You walked to him and kneeled down. You have seen him having an attack like that and knew what he needed. 

“It’s ok,” you said gently embracing him. He was still too afraid to touch you and stiffened at the contact of your warm body. “I know what you are thinking about and I want you to know that I am not afraid of you. I need you to breathe, ok” he closed his eyes again and nodded rapidly.

It took you some time to calm him down but after a while his breathing went back to normal. You knew how much he loved it when you played with his hair so you started to comb his raven black locks with your fingers. You two stayed like that for a few minutes until Loki spoke again.

“How are you not scared?” he still wouldn’t look you in the eyes but  was watching your every move. “I’m a monster! A beast! People on Asgard tell their children how terrible and scary we are! Could you ever want to be with something like me?”

“Loki, I will always want you,” you cupped his face with your hands and made him look at you “I know we haven’t been together for long but I want you to know that I love you, Loki” you confessed, softly caressing his cheeks. “I love you no matter what gender or colour you are or from which planet you came from.”  Trickster’s eyes were once again filled with tears but this time there were the tears of happiness. He knew you cared about him but he has never dared to dream about love  “You see this?” you asked taking one of his blue hands in yours “You can’t hurt me, Loki. I know you would never do that to me. And believe me when I say that you are no monster.”

“You have no idea how much I needed to hear that.” he said and hugged you tightly. “I love you. More than you could ever imagine….” he whispered and the two of you stayed like that for some time, silently crying in each other’s arms. You slowly pulled away and wiped your tears.

“By the way, it really suits you.” you announced with a smile

“What do you mean?” Loki asked confused

“The colour blue,” you said as your index finger was gently tracing the markings on his skin. “it really suits you. Especially since your eyes are red. They are a great combination” he looked at you with love and adoration. 

“I was wondering,” you continued, “do those markings mean something? They are exquisite. And do your eyes somehow help you see better in the dark? Do you have a night vision or something like tha-” you stopped talking when you felt Loki’s lips on yours.

 Putting your hands around his neck you deepened the kiss. His hands were softly caressing your back and pulled you as close to his body as physically possible. Although he radiated cold you didn’t mind at all because you wouldn’t have it any other way. 

You didn’t know this at the time but that night you saved his life and gave him hope. With that single confession you made him want to live again...

[romanestuffsposts]

Hello!

I never really send in requests, but I was wondering if you could do something where the reader accidentally gets hurt or get overwhelmed, and they slip into a smaller space? And just need a lot of comfort from their daddies? (With a little bit more comfort from bucky?) They just get babied? It's okay if you're busy too! Have a good day!

Hi there love! 💜

Thank you for asking me such a cute request! I'm proud of you, this is your first request and it's wonderful!

I hope you like what I wrote for you sweetie ❤️

Enjoy <33

*****

Warnings : mention of drowning,

Pairings : Daddies!Stucky ; Daddy!Bucky x Papa!Steve x Little!Reader

Summary : you have an accident but your Daddies are here to help you

*****

Today was a beautiful day. The sun wasn’t too hard and the breeze was just perfect to spend the afternoon outside.

But sadly, even if it was a beautiful day your Daddies still had to work in their office. They made sur to spend the entire morning with you like they promised yesterday but you knew after lunch they would leave to work.

You weren’t so sad because they spent two whole days with you and this morning so you were still pretty happy about it. Plus it’s Pepper who’s watching you this afternoon and she’s always so kind with you.

She drank tea with you and your dolls and watched you dressing them. She gave advise when you asked her, she was happy to help and you were happy that she was having a good time.

Now she was reading outside under a tree while you were running around in the garden. She read for you for a while but you grew tired of staying on the same position and needed to move so you got up.

You ran near the pool without noticing and after a few seconds, Pepper don’t hear your giggles and your footsteps anymore.

She quickly got up when she heard splashing sounds and start yelling when she sees you in the water, struggling to stay above the water.

Your Daddies, even if they were working kept the door and the windows open just incase. They heard the yelling and quickly got up, they ran outside and the first thing they see is you, struggling in the water.

Steve ran toward the pool following by Bucky and he jumps in the water without caring about his expensive clothes. He grabs you in his arms and make sure to quickly get out of the water.

‘’I’ve got you princess’’ he whispers ‘’you’re in Papa’s arms, I’m here’’ he kisses your temple.

Bucky is quick by your side and kisses the back of your head. Your Daddies carried you inside the house and turn on the little fire they have in the living room.

They know you need to stay in their arms but they need to change your clothes first. You’re freezing cold even with the weather outside and they can’t let you like that.

Pepper stay downstairs to prepare you a warm bottle and to make sure there’s nothing wrong with the fire while you’re upstairs.

‘’shhh, it’s okay baby. We’ve got you, you’re safe in the house’’

You let out a cry and when your Papa tries to sit you on the bed you cry louder and hold on to him for dear life.

‘´baby-

‘’no’’ you cry ‘’pease, don wanna leave Papa arms’’ you sob.

Bucky caresses your back up and down and leans closer to your ear ‘’I know you don’t wanna leave papa’s arms right now but we need to change you in new clothes. You’re so cold baby, we can’t let you like that. We’ll change you in your favorite pyjama and then you’ll be back in our arms’’

You sob and shake your head ‘’pease’’

‘’What if Daddy change you while you’re in my arms ? Does that sound good to you ?’’ Your Papa proposes.

You sniff a few times and then nod your head.

Bucky start by pulling your shirt off of you while Steve moves his arms and hold you in différents ways during the process so Bucky has easier access to change you. Once your top is on, he goes behind Steve who doesn’t move.

He removes your shoes and your wet socket and comes back in front of Steve to remove your pants. It was harder to remove than your shirt but after some minutes you’re in your comfortable and warm pyjama, still in Papa’s arms.

Bucky kisses your red little nose before heading downstairs.

Bucky takes a hold of your cold little toes while Steve carries you downstairs to try and warmth them up a bit.

He knows that if your toes, your fingers, your ears or your nose are cold, you won’t be able to warmth up.

You rest your cheek on your Papa’s shoulder and look into your Daddy’s eyes. He always keeps his eyes on you.

Pepper had prepared blankets on the floor near the fire so everything is ready for when you come back. She placed a bottle near the blankets with a little note that said that she was leaving to leave you together, she informed your Daddies that she was going to talk to fury and Tony about the work who wouldn’t be done because of the accident, she said to nod worrying, she was handling the situation with them.

Your Papa gently brings the bottle to your lips, his fingers are caressing your hair. Your Daddy reaches under the cover and grabs back your feet to rest them on his laps. He wraps his huge arms around your tiny feet and switch between gentle squeezes and strokes to warmth them up.

Your hands are under the blanket and you start to finally relax.

‘’You’re in our arms, beautiful. What happened today was an accident, you got scared and that’s totally normal but you’re here now, with us. You’ll always be safe with us, always’’

~

I wanted to make it longer and make an after with the traumatic event but I hadn’t posted in a long time and I didn’t wanted to make you wait any longer.

I was thinking about writing about the little one being scared to go in water, wether it’s the shower, bath or the pool (maybe even the rain ?) and she’s scared when her Daddies have to leave her to work (you know because she had the accident when they were working and they said that she was safe when they were with her but if they leave for work they’re not with her so she’s scared)

So yeah, I want to make a part 2 but I’ll do it if you want to! 💋

[lozchi]

I was looking around and I was wondering. What if Taehun had a loser girlfriend who's literally the complete opposite of him. Like she's wayyy nicer then him (too nice), probably a push over, and not that smart. But she's the comfort he wants ykyk I'M SORRY I'M THAT LOSER GF I JS WANT A MAN LIKE TAEHOON

Dummy!

A/N: worry not, anon. I'm that loser GF too. 😭 This'll be shorter than my usual, forgive me. I loved writing this so much though. 🫀🥹

Pairing: Taehoon Seong x F!Reader

Themes: reader being an idiot. if you're familiar with my writing, there is always swearing.

To some, it’s baffling how one could fall for Taehoon Seong out of all people. He’s a pretty guy with captivating eyes and graceful movements, nghhh~ he's undeniably irresistible, isn't he? Every girl around him would think the same, swooning left and right due to his insane visuals -- Tsk! He's gorgeous! And you weren’t any different. In fact, you were his biggest simp.

It was a curious pairing, to say the least—Mr. Bad Boy and Miss Too-Good-For-Your-Own-Good.

Taehoon strode into the room with the kind of attitude that made people step aside. His arrogance and aggression were palpable. “Do I look like a fuckin’ bank to ya? I ain’t lending 7000, got it? Now scram before I beat the shit outta ya.”

You, on the other hand, were the epitome of kindness and generosity. “Sure! You can borrow 200,000 won from me! Just pay it as soon as you can!” Yeah, incredibly dumb too, unfortunately.

Taehoon had an uncanny ability to read people like an open book. “You think I’m stupid enough to fall for that?” He’d snap, seeing through deceptions with ease.

Meanwhile, “Always happy to help!” You remained blissfully unaware of how people took advantage of you.

Taehoon lived by his own rules, always favoring his own brand of logic. “I’m doing this my way. It’s more efficient.” he would declare, unyielding in his methods.

And then there was you, grappling with concepts that seemed beyond your grasp. “Fuck this shit, I don’t understand a thing!”

“It’s math.” He'd say, almost bemused.

“I hate it.” you’d retort, your frustration evident.

“Those are just numbers.” he would explain.

“Fuck numbers, bruh!” you’d respond, exasperated.

“USE THE THEOREMS, GOD DAMN IT!”

“WHAT THEOREMS!?!” you’d cry out in desperation.

In physical prowess, he was unmatched, while you... Uhh... “How many more laps? It’s been ages!” you’d complain during your grueling training sessions.

“It’s been 5 fucking minutes, y/n,” he’d respond, barely breaking a sweat.

You were expressive, a fucking drama queen. While he remained, well, Taehoon.

When you’d proclaim, “I love you!” your heart on your sleeve, he’d respond with a gruff, “Of course I feel the same, dummy.”

A small injury would elicit your dramatic reaction: “Ouch! That stings!” while he’d barely bat an eye and say, “Be careful next time, you dimwit.”

You might sob over a movie, your emotions spilled out loud, and he’d- “Boooo. 0 stars. Too many plot holes. ”

Sometimes, vulnerability hits you, “Ugly crying in my bed right now,” and he’d cut through the sadness with an - “Alright, who the fuck hurt you?”

Happiness flowed from you like a river when you were with him. “I’m so happy when I’m with you~” To which he’d retort, “Same-- Ugh! Will you wipe that grin off?”

When you voiced how something hurt you, he’d reply bluntly, “Sometimes we just have to suck it up.”

“Can’t you be a little more sensitive?” But he'd always try. “I’m trying to understand where you’re coming from.”

And in the wake of betrayal, you’d lament, “Aughh, I just didn’t expect her to backstab me like that, I’m so stupid!” He’d offer a rough kind of comfort, “Want me to kick her in the ass?”

But beneath all these differences—your gentleness against his toughness, your warmth melting through his cold exterior—there was balance.

There was love.

There was harmony.

If it wasn’t already clear, he needed you just as much as you needed him.

From time to time, Taehoon shows his vulnerable side. You have to remember, he's just a human being and he can't always keep up his tough guy persona.

He grapples with uncertainties, worried that without caution, he could distance himself from you and ultimately be left alone.

He carries a burden of past mistakes that weighs heavily on his shoulders. It's an injury he seldom recognizes, yet it impacts all his decisions in a subtle way.

The thought of his previous mistakes coming back to trouble him and harming his loved ones worries him deeply.

However, despite feeling clearly insecure, Taehoon, being Taehoon, decides to never address it openly.

These ideas, though, are simply possibilities. He always puts in the effort to avoid making mistakes.

You understand there’s more beneath the surface and always offer him gentle reassurance.

“Taehoon, you’re here now, and that’s what matters. I’m with you, no matter what.”

In his own way, he cherishes the balance you bring to his life.

After all, even a bad boy needs a good girl to keep him grounded.

As you look at him, with all his imperfections and flaws, you smile and say, “I love you.”

And he looks back at you with a rare, genuine smile and replies, “Yeah, I love you too, dummy.”

[actuallysaiyan]

Bruises That Won't Heal(Sorahiko Torino/Gran Torino x Fem!Reader)

warnings: smut, age gap(reader in mid 20s and Torino probably close to 40s), mentions of Nana and Sorahiko being together, Nana's death being mentioned, alcohol, angst, crying, virginity loss, vaginal fingering, breast play, pregnancy mention. word count: 2.2k pairings: Sorahiko Torino/Gran Torino x Fem!Reader summary: you've fantasized about him for so long, and after Nana's death you wonder if maybe you should shoot your shot. he takes good care of you during your first time, but afterwards the glitter fades and he gives you a taste of reality. a/n: I do not know what came over me but I decided to write this and then it got fucking angsty and I couldn't stop. Hope y'all enjoy! Thank you @cherryblossombankai for beta reading!

dividers: @adornedwithlight

taglist:  @thissaintjessi.  @cherryblossombankai, @thestarsystemsworld @pixelcafe-network

psst wanna join the taglist? Fill out the form here!(Please have age indicator visible on your blog)

You didn’t know what really drew you in. He was a miserable man, frowning all the time. You figured since the death of Nana Shimura, he wasn’t the same. There was a lack of glow within him. And for so long, you had looked up to both of them. Losing Nana had been a devastating blow to you.

You knew that Gran Torino had sent his little protege off to America, hopefully to keep the enemy away from him. While you should have been going gaga over Toshinori, you couldn’t help but have your eyes on Gran Torino.

Damn Sorahiko…

You wanted this crush to go away. You wanted it to fade completely. But the more you tried to push it away, the more you found yourself wanting to find the man and maybe help him with the pain of losing his partner. You weren’t sure if he and Nana were actually romantically involved, but you were thinking there must have been something there.

When you meet up with him next, he tries to ignore you. You weren’t going to give up just like that. You try your best to get his attention, but he’s just not quite interested just yet.

Then one night, you two end up at the bar together. With a few drinks in him, he loosens up just a bit.. Your heart is racing every time he gets so close to you. He smells nice; rich and inviting. It’s almost intoxicating to your senses. He keeps bringing you out to the dancefloor between drinks. Soon you two are tucked away in the alleyway out back.

“What does a perfectly lovely young woman want with an old man like me?” He asks, nipping at your neck.

“I want you. I’ve always wanted you. You’re my inspiration.”

He freezes at your words. You’ve got no idea what you’re getting yourself into. But he’s been lonely since he lost Nana. She’d be scolding him for becoming so depressed and letting himself go.. She would be happy that someone is showing interest in him.

“Inspiration, huh? You’ve got weird tastes, girlie.”

But he still kisses you hungrily. You can taste the whiskey on his breath. You can’t help yourself; you press your body up against his. You feel the definition of muscles, loving the way he’s trying to buff up for you right now. It’s like he’s trying to put on a show just for you.

“How long have you wanted this for?” He asks you between heated kisses.

You blush and look down. “Too long.’”

He grins, “Come on, tell me.”

“I’ve been fantasizing about being with you since I was about twenty…”

This causes him to groan. You really have been fantasizing about him and his cock since you were twenty…god it shouldn’t be that hot, but it is. He brings your hand down to his pants, helping you squeeze his bulge.

“Look at what you’re doing to me, baby girl.”

The words make you shudder. “Can’t help it. Daddy.”

This word causes him to pick you up and hurriedly fly you to his apartment. He opens the door with ease, helping you inside. Once in his bedroom, the man pushes you onto his bed. You get a good idea of how sad he’s been considering the room is in complete disarray. But you push those thoughts away, wanting to see where this night goes.

“You want me to take good care of you, don’t you?” He asks, his cheeks a little pink.

You nod. “Please daddy.”

Sorahiko begins to strip you. He’s surprisingly tender, which makes your heart feel so full of affection. You don’t have the heart to tell him that it’s actually your first time. You’re faking things to make sure he thinks you’re experienced. Though, he’s pretty confident in being able to tell that this is your first time.

His big hands cup your breasts, pushing them together before leaning in to take one of your nipples into his mouth. Your back arches off the bed and you eagerly run your fingers through his hair. He didn’t think this small action would cause him to falter in his movements. It just feels so good to have someone showing him affection. 

His eyes lock with yours as he continues to suckle on your nipples and nip at the swell of your breast. It’s been a while since he’s been intimate. He’s had a few hookups since his last time with Nana, and he’s so desperately trying to push that last time out of his mind. All he wants to do is lose himself to the feeling of you.

“Sorahiko…” you let out when his fingers brush against your wet labia.

He smirks at you. “Pretty girl’s all wet for me…but I don’t think you deserve more until you use my proper name.”

“D-daddy, please don’t tease.”

Despite it being your first time, Sorahiko is quite convinced you’re experienced. You want to tell him, but you’re worried it might scare him off. So you spread your legs more, bucking only when he teases you just a little more. He smears your arousal all over your labia and clit, spending his time rubbing the little nub in just the way you like it.

“That’s it, that’s daddy’s girl.”

One of his fingers pushes into you and you gasp. You weren’t expecting that just a finger would be such a stretch. He looks into your eyes once more, making sure you’re feeling alright. There’s such a look of concern and it makes your heart skip a beat. You nod, letting him know it’s okay.

“It’s your first time, isn’t it?” His voice is soft and laced with tenderness.

Your cheeks burn and you try to look away. “Y-yes, it is.”

He leans in to capture your lips in such a sweet kiss. It makes your head whirl with so many emotions. You shouldn’t be falling in love with a man who’s much older than you, but the way he’s stimulating you makes you realize that he might be ruining sex for you with anyone else.

“Let me take care of you.”

His words make your whole body warm up. He continues to pump his finger into you, making sure to go slow. His thumb comes up to rub your clit in time. Soon he’s adding another finger. Torino watches for any signs of discomfort before he begins to scissor the fingers inside of you to stretch you out. He then leans in again and kisses you over and over.

“Cum for me, beautiful.”

It takes a few more thrusts of his fingers to send you over the edge with a soft pant of his name. He loves the way you look when you come undone like this. Your cheeks flush, hair sticking to your face and your legs shaking. He prolongs the pleasure until you’re squirming.

Then he pulls off his own clothes. You get the full eyeful of him. He’s gorgeous, toned and he has a littering of scars on his body. The way you so tenderly caress his chest has his breath hitching in his throat. Nobody but Nana has ever touched him quite like this.

“You sure you’re okay with this, kiddo?” He asks once more, rubbing your thighs as he slots himself between them.

You nod eagerly. “I’m ready. I want this.”

Sorahiko grasps his cock, letting it rub between your soaked folds before the tip prods your tight little hole. You gasp and cling to him when he pushes into you. It’s slow at first, and he’s whispering soft words of praise to keep you feeling comfortable and safe. A few tears slide down your cheeks and he’s good to kiss them away.

“You’re doing so well for me, baby girl.” He coos so softly.

Bit by bit, he pushes more of himself into you. When he bottoms out, he looks into your eyes and he grabs your hands. Your heart skips a beat when he intertwines his fingers with yours.

“I’ll always be here to take good care of you,” he whispers but you swear those words are meant for someone else.

Your heart clenches in your chest and you try not to cry again. You wish you could just fall in love with him. You know you could never take away the pain of losing Nana, but you could help him heal. You could help him see that he’s so worthy of love.

Sorahiko begins thrusting, making the bed under you rock a little. You gasp as his cock hits the sweet spot inside of you. The stretch is being replaced with delicious pleasure that you never knew could exist. You immediately wrap your legs around him to bring him in even closer.

He kisses you hungrily and sloppily, the remnants of the alcohol running through his system. He feels like old wounds are being opened and you are just tearing down the walls he’s been putting up for way too long. He hates that you can just so easily reach into him and tug on his heartstrings like his.

When you whimper and tell him you’re close, it makes him feel so good. For an older man, he can still pleasure you. He grows confident in his movements and even reaches between you both to rub your clit. The sound of your voice is pure music to his ears, making him grunt.

Your walls clamp down around him, pulling him closer to his own release. He groans your name as he tries to warn you that he’s close. With a few more pumps of his hips, he spills deep inside of you. Tears stream down your cheeks again as you feel so loved. You hold onto him, rubbing his back and kissing the top of his head as he slumps against your breasts.

Torino looks away and hides his own tears. How could you make him feel so loved and appreciated? You shouldn’t be chasing this dream. He’s just an old man that could hold you back. You’re in the prime of your career. You should be with someone like Toshinori, closer in age and also in the prime of his career.

Sorahiko pulls out of you, watching as his cum dribbles out of your cute little hole. Without thinking, he pushes it back into you and kisses you deeply. He’s going to regret all of this in the morning when the fog settles, but right now he wants to just be as close to you as he can.

Tenderly, he cleans you up and he holds you in his arms. You nuzzle against his chest, looking up at him like he strung the stars in the sky just for you. Every time your eyes meet, he feels himself falling deeper in love with you. You, who pulled out all these damn feelings.

“Sleep now, pretty darling.”

His words and soft, sweet affections lull you to sleep. The smell of sex and his cologne permeate the air. You feel good in his embrace. For the first time, you feel so loved.

The next morning, you wake up cold and alone. The bed feels so empty without the man you lost your virginity to in it. You stretch out, trying to pretend that he’s here. You get up from the bed; all of your muscles aching from the lovemaking last night. With a heavy heart, you pull on your clothes.

You’re not expecting to find him in the kitchen. He hands you a glass of water and some painkillers.. All the softness and love from last night is gone. You feel like you’re encountering a stonewall. 

“You should go,” he says gruffly. “We don’t want the press to know about this.” You scoff, “I didn’t think you were someone who cared about that kind of stuff.”

He feels terrible for doing this, but if he severs the bond now, you won’t be too sad when he pushes you away inevitably. He tried his best to push all thoughts of Nana away, but dammit she’s all he can think about. Sorahiko thinks about that promise he made…the choice he and Nana had to make.

“Just get going, come on, kid.”

The word stings more than it should. You feel yourself shaking as you try to place the empty glass on the counter. Your own body defies you and you throw yourself at him desperately, but he pushes you away. You’re crying now, begging him to reconsider.

“Don’t do this to yourself, kid. Don’t torture yourself. Last night was just some fun. I was drunk and so were you.”

Your heart shatters when you listen to him. The way he had taken care of you had you thinking it was different. You realize now that you’ll never ever be able to hold a candle to Nana Shimura. You get up off your knees, dusting yourself off. He won’t look at you, but you can tell he’s crying too.

“Fine, it was just a night of fun. Don’t come to me when you need fun again.”

You grab your jacket and slam the door behind you. Sorahiko begins to cry and he holds his head in his hands. Nana was gone and you deserved so much better than this broken old man.

As the days go by, you realize that your little night of fun turned into something more. For more than ten months, you disappear from the public eye. When you return to hero work, the man you had fallen in love with has changed. Not only physically, but also emotionally.

And somewhere in the world, there’s a little girl with gray hair and dark eyes who wonders who her parents are. And perhaps she never will.

reblogs and comments always appreciated!

©actuallysaiyan 2024– do not repost on other platforms, copy, translate or edit my works!

[plleeeepppyyyy]

I have a request if you’re doing any!!

Wally Darling x Rockstar Reader

I don’t care what you do with this but I hope you enjoy it!!

Reader is the singer and dancer of the neighborhood! Very happy go lucky, loving, and even a little clumsy. Yet always calm during making music

Which I can picture reader being a great muse. And reader singing a lot to Wally.

this was def fun to write!! all the ideas and cutesy stuff came to me in a flash ngl.. (;´༎ຶٹ༎ຶ`)

really cute request!! you guys are so creative with these,,,(•̀ᴗ•́)و

wally + singer/rock star reader!

__

♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪

♬♫♬♫♬♫♬♫♬♫♬♫♬♫♬♫♬♫

••••••••••••••

•this man,,, god,, this man.

•he’s literally ur number one fan girl. he’s there for every performance, writings, everything. you name it he’s there!

•wally just loves watching you in the process of making music, its like an art! to him, it’s wonderful of how passionate you are about it. he adores watching you almost trip on a cord as you just jam out,, doesn’t matter how clumsy you are,, you’re just elegant to him. seeing you so peaceful as you strum on a guitar or something.. 🫶 (if he had a camera he would take a pic of you 200x)

•literally every-time you come up to him with ur newest draft of a song, he gets so excited!! that inner fangirl comes out.,, wally is pretty honest when it comes to stuff. but he just can’t help himself, every song, draft, album,, literally all perfection to him. you cannot do no wrong with that. he buys all of your stuff if you ever sell it. (prolly got a shrine.)

•if you ever write a song based on him,, he would actually cry out of happiness, at least be on the verge of it. you just give the song to him and he’s just like, “it’s so perfect,,,, tysm,,” while he’s on the verge of letting it out. he’ll listen to it every day. :) <3

•bonus points if you write it for your guys’ one year anniversary! that man will be so happy,, he probably would let a few tears out too..,,. like you used your creativeness on little old him?!(!(ಡ‸ಡ) wally would cherish the hell out of that song, he can just mumble out a praise as he’s about to ugly cry. like.. THANK YOU?!(!? (;´༎ຶٹ༎ຶ`)

•he’ll just grab a hold of you and not let go,, it just makes him feel so happy. he’ll probably cry into ur shirt tho,,

•if you ever had some albums posted out or whatnot, he will put them on his wall. wally would prolly accidentally buy out the whole thing,, like cmon, he’s has to use some of them for display and hearing!! ( ˘ ³˘)

•ur his main inspiration for his art too,, seeing you so into doing what u do, gibes him strength. he will ABSOLUTELY paint tf outta you! literally you guys would be in the same room while he sketches and you just strum your guitar or smth, ack he’s a sucker for moments like those. ur for sure his muse. got ten whole folders of drawings and projects that are meant for you.

•he might even call you his muse tooo! :)

•he asked you once what type of music you were doing and you prolly replied with a random genre he’s never heard up,, and he’d just be like. “ah, that’s wonderful.. can’t wait to hear it.”

•he do NOT give a care,, any genre in his eyes and ears it’s perfection. like said before, you do wrong.

•if ur the type to do sad songs, he’s a little worried. like bby what’s got you so sad? :(

•sometimes (if you offer) he also does stuff with you. to him he thinks he’s better at playing instruments, which is lie he’s hella good at singing.

•he’ll give you ideas, suggestions; whatever you need!

•i literally will say it here, ya’ll do duets with each other. especially with old timey love songs, it’s just cute,,, a bit sappy. but who cares, I IMAGINE you two just singing together. (bonus points if he’s playing a piano,, well trying to,, he needs some practice..)

•every time you put on a performance,, he just sits there with the dopiest smile on with lovestruck written all over him. bro is VERY in love, he could listen to you alll day. if he had a tail it would be wagging. he will never take his eyes off either, all of his attention is on you, just you.

•even if you got a recording studio, he admires how much you get into the music. its so amusing seeing you be so calm during the whole process of making a song, but when you perform your songs. like thats my baby fr!!! wally is ur number one hype man,, i mean this all the way.

(i feel like hes such a sucker for singers,,)

•if ur in a nice suit, dress; whatever while ur singing, agh.. this man is knocked out. ur soo gorgeous,, and you sing?! like, sorry, wally is just in love.

•after one of your performances, once he sees you walking to him, all giddy and stuff. wally ain’t letting you go once you run into his arms, he will keep his arms around you as you just ask if he liked it, thought it was great,, while he’s just nodding and mumbling praises to you. (it’s honestly so sweet to watch you two.) if ur wearing heels or boots, you’re probably towering over him as this happens,, (i honestly find this so sweet, ur jus towering over him, asking him excitedly if he loved it, while he’s just practically sings praises to you. so sweet,,)

•to pick up the instrument part, he will totally help you with demos and drafts by playing the music for you. he’s pretty average on most instruments and would totally drop whatever he had and help you out! (will def help you out with drums, i think its canon that its his main thing,,)

•sing him to sleep, please,, he will eat that up. if you do, he’ll sleep so fast. as said before by me, i don’t think he sleeps much. but with ur singing? knocked out, my brother is dead asleep. what can he say? you’re just a good singer.

•honestly to him, ur like a siren. you’re just too good to be true and sing beautifully. corny he knows but,,, its true <3 (to him.)

•even house loves your singing! if wally needed the help he would call you and try to make house stop with ur singing,,

•the first time he’s ever heard you sing, his mind was blown. how did you sing that good? like all of his other friends could sing,, but you were just different. you sounded different, did things differently.. ack. he fell in love with your voice. as he listened to one of ur song’s for the first time, and ur just anxious. wondering if he’ll like it, or not.. he turns to you. blank stare, and says, “this is the best music i’ve ever heard,, ur so talented..” with just pure adoration and fondness in his eyes.

•which got you SO HAPPY, he loved your songs!!!! ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

•sometimes if he feels a bit snarky that day, he’ll brag a bit. just all like, “my s/o is a beautiful singer,, can YOU sing that good? they’re so amazing at what they do, no one can compare…” wally is sometimes a bit of a prick (╥_╥)

•never a prick to you tho, said it before i’ll say it again, to him you do no wrong, see no wrong, hear no wrong, speak no wrong. 🫶

•he makes sure you know that you’ll always be in his corner, all of the time, being ur numba one fangirl! (✯◡✯)

•wally definitely tried making a song for you too,, didn’t go right tho. (٥⁀▽⁀ )

(seriously this dude is crazed over you.)

•you always make sure he’s the first one to hear your songs, after writing a draft you sprint to him and show him it. it makes him so excited too, cause like.. how did he get so lucky that he’s the first person to look and hear your talent?

•this dude just adores you, so much.. like what’s not to love? to him you’re just the peak definition of passion, he enjoys watching you have fun and play music. wally is sorta taking this into seriousness,, but he can’t help it!! he can’t get over how he bagged you, this person who’s a whole peak of inspiration for him. ❤︎︎

•he just loves to support and cherish you, i won’t lie but he’s basically a lovestruck puppy who watches you and everything you do. everyone in the neighborhood can tell.. (¯ ³¯)♡

__________

ACK,, okay i got a bit carried away on some points, but they were jus too cute to not put in.

BUT 1000 NOTES ON EACH OF MY FICSSs?!?! thats insane, thank you guys sm!! (╥_╥) i didn’t think i would get that much positive feedback for these, im rlly glad you guys are liking these!

hope you enjoyed reading this one! ( ˘ ³˘)♥︎

[ot8archivesblog]

New Years Eve

꒰ ͜͡➸ Pairing: ot8 x Reader

꒰ ͜͡➸ Genre: Fluff, cuddling, kiss, tears (of joy), a little sad at Felix pov but still a lot of fluff!!

꒰ ͜͡➸ w/c: 5,6k

꒰ ͜͡➸Masterlist

Chan:

New Years Eve approached faster than expected and it had been a tradition for Chan and you, to always keep the Christmas tree until after New Year. The atmosphere seemed more cozy with the little tree in the corner and it made you feel more at home. It was sad that Chan wasn’t able to spend it with his family, but you wanted to make sure that he’d still feel comfortable and happy with spending it with you. You had woken up earlier than normal, being happy that Chan was still asleep and started working on the breakfast first. The dinner would certainly be more fancy but first you’d get the breakfast done. Chan normally worked late, meaning he often slept in on his off days, which was lucky for you. You were nearly done with the breakfast when strong arms wrapped around your waist and his head found its way to your shoulder. “Why are you up so early?” You questioned while turning your head to him, to give him a quick kiss. “You weren’t next to me, so I wanted to see what you’re up to.” His voice extremely deep, as he had just woken up. “I figured I could make some breakfast for us, before I get to dinner.” “Oh, about that…” His tone seemed strained and you wondered what was going on. “We can’t spend the evening together. Something came up at the Company, something about plagiarism… I really have to go and sort it out and that could take a while…” He sighed and you tried to not show your disappointment by smiling at him. “It’s okay Channie. It’s not your fault and those are some serious allegations. Just take care of them, I’ll wait here for you.” He apologised a million times during breakfast and you tried to reassure him as much as possible that it would be okay. After that, he had to leave, leaving you alone at the apartment. That was certainly not what you had planned. Not only couldn’t he spend the evening with his family, but now he couldn’t spend it with you either, which kind of made you sad. Not for yourself, but for Chan. He deserved a break and it bothered you that he couldn’t get one. You started watching a series you really liked, while snacking on some stuff. You figured you could just get something delivered when you felt hungry. However, your phone suddenly went off and you saw Felix’ name on the display. “Felix? Is everything okay?” “Yes, everything is okay. I was wondering if you’re free.” “Free? To do what?” “Well, the boys are all at their houses with their families and I heard Chan-Hyung was caught up by work so I figured you’re free too.” “Weren’t you going to celebrate with Hyunjin and his family?” “Yeah, but something came up.” “Oh, well sure. What did you have in mind?” “Lets meet at that one restaurant we all liked. I’ll send you the address.” With that you hung up and started to get ready. It wasn’t something out of the ordinary for you to spend time with the boys, or one of them but it still felt weird. After you got ready you went to the address that Felix send you and waited for him in front of the restaurant. “Hey there, baby.” You immediately turned around and saw none other than Chan himself. “Channie?” You looked around, searching for Felix but he was nowhere to be seen. “Felix is not here. He’s at Hyunjin’s.” Chan chuckled and you tilted your head, slightly confused now. “I wanted to surprise you. I knew you had dinner planned and everything and that you wouldn’t accept my help, so I figured I’d make up an excuse to leave and get you to come here.” He finally explained yourself and you pouted. “You’re a meanie! I was so worried because you had to work on New Years Eve.” “Sorry, sorry.” Chan chuckled and hugged you. You two entered the restaurant, with a beautiful view over Seoul. You were lost in your conversation when you heard the first fireworks. It was 23:59. “They started early.” “No, the big fireworks have yet to come.” Chan answered but you certainly missed them, as Chan connected his lips with yours.

Minho:

You were currently getting ready to make your way to Minho’s. Even though you spend more time at his apartment then yours, you still kept yours. You were too lazy to move all your stuff to his, but you two wanted to do so in the new year. It was one of your goals, that you had set together so that you didn’t always have to go back and forth when you two practically lived together anyway. You were looking forward to Minho but also to Soonie, Dori and Doongie. The three little cats had stolen your heart the moment you went to Minho’s for the first time, so you certainly couldn’t imagine a New Years Eve without them. But moving them from Minho’s apartment to yours would be too uncomfortable for them, as it would be a new environment. The evening would be uncomfortable enough because of the noise already, the change of environment didn’t need to be as well. You didn’t mind anyways. You often went to Minho’s, instead of Minho coming to yours, so it was fine. Your phone pulled you out of your thoughts and your screen lit up with Minho’s name. “Hey.” You put the phone on speaker as you were still applying makeup. “Are you on your way yet?” You could hear a soft “miau” from the background and couldn’t help but smile. “No, I’m still getting ready, why?” “I have to go pick something up, so I was just wondering if you’re already on your way or if I still have time.” “I’ll still need a bit so you can go and pick it up.” You also had to pick something up on the way, so it would take you longer anyway. “Okay, that’s great. I’ll see you in a bit then.” You ended the call and soon finished with your makeup as well. After getting into a comfortable dress, you took your bag and left your apartment. You decided to drive to Minho’s today. It wasn’t too far on foot, only about 20 minutes but you still had to pick something up and you didn’t really want to carry it with you all the way to his house. It didn’t take long and you were finally on your way to Minho’s apartment. “Yes?” Minho immediately picked up after you called him. You were close to his apartment now and you wanted to make sure he’s already back. “I’m close now. Are you still at the out? If so, then I can take you with me. I’m with my car.” “No, don’t worry. I’m already home.” It didn’t take you long to arrive at his apartment, parking your car and making your way up to his floor. He opened the door for you, as you had forgotten the key at your apartment and took the bags from your hands. “What did you get?” Minho asked as he placed them on top of the kitchen counter as you were greeted by Soonie, Doongie and Dori. “Just some stuff.” You answered, preoccupied with the little cats. After a few minutes you finally joined him in the kitchen and only then did you notice a cake. “No way… Is that what you went out to get?” “Yes, remember when we both saw it at the store? We both liked it so I figured I could get it for today.” “Minho…” He looked at you and immediately understood. “You got it too?” He couldn’t help but laugh at that, which you immediately joined in. Now two cakes were sitting at the living room table. You had also gotten a lot of snack for Soonie, Doongie and Dori of course. “Sometimes we really do think too alike.” You chuckled as you snuggled up to him on the couch. “True, but great minds think alike so we can’t do anything about it.” You smiled softly and the evening went rather calmly, until the fireworks started. You softly cuddled the three cats, so that they wouldn’t be too scared, offering them a lot of snacks and petting them, taking their minds of the fireworks. As soon as they were finally done, Minho couldn’t help but admire you openly. “I love you.” “I love you too.” A soft kiss followed, sealing your new year. 

Changbin:

“Baby, you don’t have to be so tense.” Changbin’s voice slightly pulled you out of your concentrated state. You had been taking your wardrobe apart since the morning and Changbin finally decided to try and calm you down. His parents had invited you two to spend the New Years Eve together and even though you had met his family quite often, you still got nervous every time. His mother loved you and so did his sister and father, but somehow, even while knowing that, it didn’t calm you. “Binnie, we’re having dinner at your huge house, with your family… I don’t think anyone would be anything but tense.” “But it’s not the first time you’ve been there and met them.” He argued back, leaning back on the chair he had been sitting on for hours now. You had asked him to help you find an outfit and he of course didn’t mind, but the worry on you made him slightly worried too. He hated to see you tense, insecure or sad, so this was really no the setting he had hoped for. He wanted you to be comfortable, not worried. “Listen, baby.” He stood up and softly embraced your form, your head leaning against his chest, listening to his calming heartbeat. “If it’s too much we can cancel.” “No, it’s not that.” “What is it then?” “I don’t know. I just wanna leave a good impression.” “They love you. I doubt you can leave any better impression than you already have.” “You think so?” “Of course, baby. They love you. You know that. My mother and sister literally never leave your side when you’re there and my father likes you a lot too. There’s really nothing to worry about. They're all looking forward to spending today with us both. They even told me I shouldn’t bother showing up without you.” He chuckled at that and you had to join, finally easing your tensed muscles. “Okay, fine. Thank you Bonnie.” He gave you a soft kiss, before he left to get ready as well. It didn’t take long for you to finally choose a dress for the evening and you started to get ready as well. The makeup took you a bit as you weren’t sure what exactly you wanted to do, but you were still on time. “Lets take my car.” Changbin offered, taking the keys for his car, as you both made your way out of the apartment. It was rather chilly and you had forgotten our jacket, but the car was thankfully in front of the apartment so you didn’t walk for long. Changbin’s mother was the one to open the door for your two and she immediately embraced you first, before she did so to Changbin as well. “You two look amazing! Come inside.” She gently took your hands, leading you to the living room. Changbin’s father and sister were also already there and greeted you with the same warmth, his mother had done just seconds ago. You found yourself between his mother and sister, engaged in a conversation while he was talking to his father. It didn’t take long until dinner was ready and the conversation was moved to the dinning room. It was really nice and you felt silly for worrying so much in the first place. You felt Changbin taking your hand under the table and couldn’t help but smile at him softly. It was soon time for the fireworks, so you all went outside. It was even colder than before and you really regretted not taking a jacket. However, as perceptive as he was, Changbin of course had noticed it and draped his jacket over your shoulders. “Thank you.” “Of course.” The soft kiss that followed drowned out the sound of the fireworks completely, as you only focused on him and your beating heart.

Hyunjin:

You woke up rather early, being extremely excited for the day. It was New Years Eve, but that was certainly not the reason of your excitement. Hyunjin had promised to take you to his art studio today. He had been really inspired the last few weeks and had spend a lot of time there. You had often gone there but it felt different today. It somehow felt special. Hyunjin had already left earlier, claiming that he still had to finish a certain painting before you came, so you fixed yourself a small breakfast and readied some stuff you could eat for dinner together. You doubted that you would be back before midnight, so you could spend the evening at his art studio. After you had fixed up something for dinner, which you could heat up at his studio, you started to get ready. It was a loose dress with a pair of black leggings. You wanted to be comfortable for the evening but also look pretty, so you also fixed your makeup before calling Hyunjin. “Jinnie, are you done?” “Nearly, why did you want to come now?” “I wanted to go pick something up from the store first, but I’d come after that. How much more time do you need?” “Around an hour?” “Sure! Then I’ll walk.” You ended the call, grabbed your bag and made your way to the store. You wanted to get some snacks and sweets before going to his studio. You figured he’d be hungry and if you really were to spend till midnight there you would certainly need some snacks and drinks as well. After getting everything you needed, you finally made your way to his art studio. It wasn’t too far but it still took you a while on foot. It had already gotten dark by the time that you had arrived and knocked on the door. “Come in!” You opened the door and were immediately awestruck. Petals of red roses were scattered around the floor, while candles lit the way. His paintings were nowhere to be seen, which made sense because of the candles. You followed the candles and were met with Hyunjin on the terrace. A cozy little sit-area, made out of cushions and blankets greeted you, being illuminated by little hanging lights. It looked like it came straight out of a fairytale. You knew Hyunjin is romantic, but you certainly hadn’t expected this. “J-Jinnie, was this why you came earlier?” “Yep, I wanted to surprise you so I had to move all the paintings to safety and then start on this.” He smiled softly, giving you a red rose before pulling you into his embrace. He took your bags afterwards and you snuggled up to each other in the little make-shift couch, eating and snacking on the stuff that you had brought with you. “I do get to see what you’ve been painting tho, do I?” “Of course. I only moved them to safety but they’re still here. Even though it’s one painting I have been working on for quite some time now.” He helped you up and lead you to a painting that was covered by a cloth. It was the only painting that was on the terrace with you. He pulled the cloth of in seconds and you were left in awe for a second time. He had painted you. “No way you see me as that beautiful.” You couldn’t take your eyes off it and he couldn’t take his eyes off you, when the fireworks went off. “No… I see you as even more beautiful but it would be impossible to capture that on a canvas.” He admitted and the moment you turned to him to disagree he connected your lips, silencing the complaint in seconds. Not that you minded though, it was certainly the most beautiful way to start the new year.

Jisung:

You really worried about Jisung at this point. He had spent a lot of time in the studio in the past few weeks. At first you had thought that it was because he was working on a song with Chan and Changbin, but they both had told you that they had already finished all the songs they had been planning to finish before New Years Eve. They wanted to take it easy and continue in the New Year with new and fresh motivation. They were of course already planning their next comeback but it wouldn’t be too stressful for now at least. However, Jisung still rarely left the studio and you really wondered what he had been working on. He didn’t tell you and apparently neither did he tell the boys. None of them knew what he had been working on, but Chan suggested that it might be a new solo song or something close to that. Maybe he had gotten some inspiration and was now thriving in it, not wanting to stop until he was finished. Typical for artist and the boys all knew the feeling. You however didn’t, so you worry only got worse whenever you saw him return to the apartment, completely tired. Every night until today. It was New Years Eve and you were surprised when you were met with a sleeping Jisung in your shared bed. It was still rather early and you hadn’t heard him when he had returned last night, so he probably had pulled an all-nighter again. You got up as quietly as possible, so that you wouldn’t wake him, wanting him to rest as much as possible. Wanting to surprise and energise him, you started on making brunch, as you knew he wouldn’t wake up for breakfast, so you would just have to combine them. It wasn’t a rare occasion and you didn’t mind, you just wanted him to have as much rest as he could get, before he would get back to working again. He woke up around 11 am, softly hugging your form when he saw you. “Did you rest enough?” Your voice was quiet, seeing that the sleep hadn’t left him completely yet. “Mhm.” “Should we eat something?” He only nodded at that and you two made your way to the kitchen to eat the brunch you made. “Are you going back to the studio?” You were surprised when he shook his head. “Well not alone at least.” “What do you mean?” “Well it’s New Years Eve, so I was wondering if you wanna come with me.” He smiled softly at you, as he took another bite of his food. “Sure!” You had always wanted to accompany him after you had heard from Chan that he was working on something alone, but you also didn’t want to intrude. You knew that Jisung was often insecure about his lyrics or songs, so you didn’t want to push him to show you. So him asking you to accompany him was a huge thing and it made you super happy. It was already getting dark when you two had gotten ready and made your way towards the studio. It wasn’t too cold, so you two decided to walk, as it wasn’t far away from the apartment either. “What type of song is it?” You asked after a while. “I’ll let you listen to it later.” He answered and surprise took over your features again. Telling you about it was one thing, but letting you listen to it before Chan or Changbin did… was a complete other thing. You always listened to his songs, but he only let it happen after Chan and Changbin had agreed that it was really good. Jisung only wanted to show you amazing songs, even though he knew you would love all of them. You finally arrived at the studio and it was rather close to midnight now, after you had also eaten dinner. You wondered what song it was, as Jisung still didn’t let you listen to it. He took your hand softly and lead you to the rooftop of the studio. “Here.” He gave you headphones and it didn’t take you long to understand that the song was about you. “Sungie, I-…” Tears were welling up in your eyes but he didn’t give you any time to start crying, as his lips found yours the moment the fireworks erupted. “Happy New Year, Jagi.”

Felix:

You were really happy that Felix had gotten the opportunity to spend the New Years Evening with his family in Australia. You were currently driving him to the airport and even though you were sad that you couldn’t spend it with him, you were still happy he could with his family. “Do you have everything? Passport, clothes?” You asked for the millionth time this day. You were more anxious than Felix was, not wanting him to miss his chance to go see his parents. You had fussed over him the entire time when he had been packing and he could only smile at how cute you were being. “Yes, love. We’ve gone over it at home, in the car and here. I think I have everything. Don’t worry too much.” He smiled, his typical angelic smile, at you. You would certainly miss him tonight. A soft kiss later and he was on his way to his gate. You stayed until you couldn't see him anymore and then left as well, only then letting the tears fall that had threatened to. You went back to your shared apartment but it felt so empty without Felix so you figured you could go out. Getting ready and wearing something warm, you made your way to the beach. It had become quite a tradition to watch the fireworks with Felix together from this beach. You two had done so the first year you started dating and kept doing it every year, until today. Normally, Felix was too busy to fly to Australia, but this year was lucky and he found the time to do so. You strolled through the beach, your eyes fixed on the ocean. It had already gotten dark and it would only be a few hours until midnight. You pondered over calling Felix but you didn’t want him to see you cry. You didn’t want to make him sad. You sat down at your favourite spot on the beach, the spot where Felix had told you that he loved you. The spot where everything with you two had begun, when you suddenly felt someone behind you. You immediately turned, but you certainly hadn’t expected to see your angel of a boyfriend. “Lixie? But how? Why?” You couldn’t believe your eyes. It was really Felix standing in front of you. “I'm sorry for lying.” He softly started while embracing your smaller form, not too tight so you could still look up at him. “What?” “I didn’t book a flight to Australia. I wanted to, but when you said you wouldn’t be able to come, I decided against it as well. We spent Christmas with my family, so that’s more than enough for me.” “But I drove you to the airport.” “I wanted to surprise you. I told Chan-Hyung about it and he helped me. He picked me up after you had left.” Only now did you notice the little bag and flowers he had with him. He gave you the bouquet with flowers and you didn’t know how you had been able to unsee it. It was huge and beautifully arranged. “Lixie, I-…” “Just accept it please. I know what’s going on in your cute little brain now, Love. But this is what I wanted.” He smiled softly and you couldn’t hold your tears back, hiding your face on his chest. After you had calmed down, you two sat down on the blanket he had brought and enjoyed his signature brownies until the fireworks were only minutes away. “Love.” You turned to him. “You have something here.” “Where-…” But he didn’t let you finish as his lips connected with yours the moment the sky was lit up by the fireworks. 

Seungmin:

It was finally New Years Eve. You had been l looking forward to it for months now. You had a huge surprise planned for Seungmin. The boys had helped you to keep it a secret from your lovely boyfriend for months now and you were quite sure that Seungmin didn’t suspect a thing. You had prepared it whenever he was with the boys and the boys kept you updated on when he would call you or when he would leave first, to surprise you. It felt a bit mean, as you would always act surprised whenever he was home earlier, but it was all for the sake of your surprise today. His family had gone on a little vacation, so it would be only you two tonight. The moment his parents had said that, you got ready to make it the most beautiful New Years Eve ever. You were currently working on the dinner for later, with Seungmin together. He always helped you out when he was at home, today being no exception. “Is this good?” He always asked you, as he knew you were quite precise on how things had to be on special days. “Yep, thank you.” You beamed at him and he returned it with a soft smile. “By the way, I’ll have to pick something up at the store later but looking at dinner I might not be able to. Could you do it for me?” You needed him out of the house so you could get the last part of the surprise ready. “Of course. Just tell me which store and what you ordered.” His answer came in a heartbeat and you couldn’t help but think of him as adorable. “Thank you, Minnie.” Dinner was done faster than you had expected and it had gotten quite late as well. You started to arrange the plates and make some side-dishes so that it would look as if you’re still busy. “Can you go now, Minnie?” You asked softly, pulling him out of his thoughts, as he had been focused on one of the side-dishes. “Sure.” He got ready and headed out, not a second after the door shut you left the side-dish aside and called Chan. “Chan?” “I’m on my way already. There was a little bit of traffic but I should be there in 5.” “Okay that’s perfect!” You ended the call, getting the table ready now, placing all the dishes and side-dishes on it before you got the drinks. You turned the lights off, letting only the hanging lights illuminate the apartment. You nearly tripped when you heard the door, praying that it was Chan and not Seungmin. Thankfully, it was Chan and you took the little box from him. “Thank you so much, Chan.” “You’re welcome. Don’t forget to film his reaction.” “Camera is already standing, don’t worry.” You chuckled and Chan nodded, before he left. You couldn’t risk Seungmin, seeing Chan now. It didn’t take long for Seungmin to arrive and put the little cake you had ordered on the table. “Jagiya.” He called out and you could hear the confusion in his voice. “I went to pick up the stuff you ordered but the salesman gave me dog food as well. Did you plan on gifting it to one of the boys?” Seungmin asked as he entered the living room, only to let the dog food fall out of his hands. “Nope, I got it for you.” You stood there, with a little puppy in your arms. Chan had gone and picked him up as you had planned for it to be today. It had taken a long time to find the perfect little puppy at the shelter but when you did, you were overjoyed and the workers were more than happy to help with your little surprise. You knew how much Seungmin had wanted one. Chan had told you that he had even thought about buying you one, as he wanted to raise it together with you, so you figured that you could do so, in the new year. “No way… Jagiya you’re… Amazing.” He chuckled softly, before embracing the puppy and you as softly as he could. Connecting your lips the moment the fireworks erupted, while also covering the little puppies ears.

Jeongin:

“Should we pick it up before we go or on our way?” Jeongin’s question pulled you out of your thoughts and you turned to look at him. “The cake, Princess.” He chuckled softly. You were completely engrossed in your makeup that you had barely registered what he had said. “Oh. Let’s just pick it up on the way to the boys. If we pick it up now, we would just make the way twice.” “Then we should probably leave earlier tho.” Jeongin notified before he left the bathroom, where you were currently getting ready. You decided to spend this years New Year Eve together with the boys at the shared dorm. Jeongin and you mostly spend your time at your shared apartment so this would certainly be something else. Jeongin was already finished with getting ready and was just making sure you had everything. Everyone had gotten different tasks and Jeongin and you were in charge of the food. You had all decided to order some food, so that you could just enjoy the evening. You had first offered to get a cake too but Felix insisted in making it with Hyunjin as they would be making brownies anyway. You had already called the restaurant in advance, telling them when the food had to be ready. You were at your finishing touch when Jeongin had done so, wanting to make sure they wouldn’t start preparing it too early. He didn’t want it to be too cold. You slipped into your dress and left the bathroom, taking your bag and finally meeting Jeongin at the door. “You look amazing…” He was awestruck but so were you. Jeongin looked amazing no matter what. “Thank you. I can only give that back.” You chuckled softly and you two made your way to the car. It wasn’t too far but you also had to transport all the food, so it would be easier by car. Jeongin drove while you updated the boys. Chan, Changbin, Seungmin, Jisung and Minho were already at the dorm, meaning only Felix, Hyunjin, Jeongin and you were missing. Felix and Hyunjin had apparently run into traffic but they said that they would be there in around 10 minutes. By the time Hyunjin and Felix arrived, Jeongin and you had finally gotten the food and drove off as well. You finally joined the others, taking the bags out of the car. They had heard the car pull in and immediately came outside to help you with the bags of food. The aroma was filling the dorm and you all sat down around the table to start eating and joking around. By the time you had finally started to eat Felix brownies you were full. So you pushed the brownies aside for now and all went out to sit on the terrace, just enjoying the night view. The brownies on a table in between all of you, being there as little snacks, if anyone craved any. Jeongin had never left your side throughout the evening. Even though he knew that you were comfortable around the boys, he still didn’t want to be too far away. It was the first year that you spend New Year with the boys, so it was still something new and you didn’t know them as well as Jeongin did, obviously. He caressed your hand and it made you feel at ease immediately. It was close to midnight when the boys went back inside, using the excuse that they wanted to clean up the dorm a bit. “Tonight was really fun.” You broke the silence first, while leaning on Jeongin’s shoulder. “Yeah. I love you and I love the boys so this was really nice.” You smiled softly at that. “Thank you for inviting me.” “Of course. I love spending time with you and so do the boys.” “Who loves it more?” You turned to look up at him. “I do of course, Princess.” His signature smirk didn’t go unnoticed as he connected your lips, the sound of the fireworks that just erupted went unnoticed by both of you, as you lost yourselves in the kiss. Fully knowing that the boys would certainly tease you in a second about it. “I love you, Innie.” You whispered against his lips. “I love you too, Princess.” 

[716chr]

Chihiro Natsuyaki Novel - “Choose Me!”

Track 2 - 2nd Round

Sunlight filters through the window of the small apartment. 

The shadows of the window’s lattice frame cast striped patterns across the room.

Toys for girls, all of them old and worn, some cheap makeup kits, hand-me-downs from my older sister and two younger sisters, along with my mother’s flashy dresses.

I rummage through them for something I can wear and practice my dance moves on the tatami mat.

Humming along to the idol song playing on TV, I try to mimic the dance moves shown on the screen.

I love dancing.

Because when I dance, I can make people smile.

—— Chii-chan, you dance just like a pro.

That’s what big sis said.

—— Chii-nii, can you do the dance from that one MK55 song? We wanna see it!

That’s what my little sister would request.

I’ll do whatever it takes if it means everyone can clap and be happy.

When I dance, even this small, cramped, shabby apartment becomes my stage.

Sometimes even Mom smiles when she sees me dance.

—— I bet your dancing could make us some money.

When I told her that I got a solo dance part in my elementary school play, she laughed in response.

Right. If I could make money, would that make Mom happy….?

Would she be proud of me?

I wonder if she will finally love me this time…..

—— Wipe that smile off your face right now!

Shortly after graduating from middle school, these words were suddenly thrown at my face.

While I was juggling multiple part-time jobs to help make ends meet, my mother came home furious one day and started yelling at me. Each of her words hit me like a slap in the face.

—— You’re just like your father, nothing more than a lowest-of-the-low scumbag. If you keep this up, you’ll surely become just like that man.

….I was aware that I’m becoming more and more like my father.

Because I didn’t bear any resemblance to my sisters at all.

My dad walked out of our lives when I was too young to remember, and my Mom has always described him as a scumbag.

If I were to dance, my Mom might see me as an even bigger burden. She might not want to come home ever again.

With my mom’s frequent absences and my sisters constantly on edge, I can no longer dance within these walls.

I’ve been sneaking off between work shifts to dance in the alleyways more often. But I can’t change my face, and I can’t stop my body from growing.

….I really don’t want to keep growing.

If I become an adult, I might end up looking even more like my dad than I do now.

——Hey, big sis, how can I change my face…..?

Plastic surgery? But we don’t have that kind of money.

When I couldn’t take it anymore and finally asked my sister, who was living in the same apartment with me at the time, she looked at me with a momentary sadness.

She then said, “I’ll teach Chii-chan about makeup”.

It was able to change my face a little bit.

Cosmetic tools felt like magic wands.

Since Mom has those slanted, cat-like eyes, I tried lifting the corners of my eyes to accentuate them more…..

See? I look a bit more like Mom, right?

As I danced in the corner of the street, my face reflected on the edge of a shop window, I finally felt like I looked the part with my makeup on.

——Becoming a different person like this is fine.

Suddenly, in that moment, I had a realization.

It’s okay for me to not be the real Chihiro.

It’s fine if this Chihiro is made of lies. It’s fine as long as this “me” I’ve created is loved.

I want to be someone who is loved.

Deep inside my heart, where I always felt like there was a cold, gaping hole. If I’m loved, then I’m sure even that place will become warm.

That’s what I thought.

The voices of 133 people can be heard.

Today, the contestants were asked to put up childhood photos on the walls of this lavish TV show set.

We were also asked to write our aspirations by hand and put them next to the photos, so they could be introduced during the program breaks.

There were hardly any photos of me at home.

My big sister, who now lives separately from us, somehow managed to find one and brought it to me, so I made it work.

“Chii, is this your photo!? So cute! Look at you dancing~”

Komu-kun sticks close to my side and leans in to take a closer look.

In the photo, I was dancing with an innocent smile.

I wonder who took this photo.

Maybe it was the father I’d never seen before? Was my mother by his side?

Was she smiling at me in this moment?

“What about your photo, Komu-pi?”

“Yeah, this! ……And this, and this, and this….. Which one do you think is best?”

Komu-kun pulled out a dozen photos. The other contestants around us praised them, saying, “They’re all great!”

In every photo, little Komu-kun was undoubtedly very cute. He was smiling happily in all of them; many were taken of him sitting on his parents’ laps.

“Komu, you sure got a lot of photos.” Another contestant, who was putting up his own picture, chuckles.

“I really tried to pick out the best ones…. But there are still hundreds of photos from when I was little. Pretty crazy, right?” Komu-kun says with a laugh.

Someone else jokes, “Is your house a photo studio or what?”, and everyone started laughing.

But all I felt was a coldness settling in my heart.

……Kids who are loved have it different, even in things like this. For me, it was hard finding even a single photo.

“Chihiro, your smile hasn’t changed at all.”

“You look so happy.”

The people who were teasing Komu-kun also commented on my photo.

I made a dumb joke in return, “Yeah, I’ve got that manly charm now, right?”, but deep inside, my heart hurt.

……I haven’t changed at all, huh.

It’s true that I looked happy in this photo.

Because I didn’t know this happiness I had would soon crumble away. 

——But at this moment, maybe I was truly happy.

“This happiness didn’t really last for long, y’know” I swallowed down the words that threatened to escape me.

Tomorrow is selection day. After the mission song evaluation, the show was aired. 

Many viewers are deciding who to vote for, sorting us out. The number of contestants will be reduced from 133 to just 66.

“Let’s definitely make it through tomorrow.”

Komu-kun said, pressing his shoulder against mine.

Seeing his worried face made me want to comfort him.

So I took his hand, and squeezed it tightly.

“Yeah, both me and Komu-pi will surely make it. Let’s become idols together.”

For that, I was even willing to cut down on my own practice and sleep time in order to teach Komu-kun how to dance.

Komu-kun is an honest person, and he keeps improving steadily, so I’m sure it’ll be fine.

As for me…… As for me?

Can I still make it?

I really want to.

For just a moment, I closed my eyes tightly and prayed.

Track 1 | Track 2 | Track 3 | Track 4 | Track 5

[tmntxthings]

∑一 Do You Realize?・゜・。

author’s notes: idk what to say & also idk what i wrote, i was floating during this XD but we post anyhow

warnings: fluff, slice of life, flirt, cursing? unedited asf, suggestive perhaps??? if you squint?? or maybe like peanut butter a lot???

song: “ Do You Realize?? by The Flaming Lips ”

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Michelangelo was quiet as he ate his peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Though it was more peanut butter than jelly. Which really may have been even more disturbing than the silence. Who in their right mind liked the way it got stuck in the roof of their mouth?

“…”

You munched on your own sandwich. A proportionate amount of pb and j on either bread slice. After swallowing you decided to speak up.

“What?”

His response was immediate after a blink or two.

“I didn’t say anything!”

“Yeah but I know you’ve got something to say,”

He goes back to that odd quietness again. His fingers squeezing onto the sandwich too tightly. Peanut butter getting all over his hands. Well. Even more so than before. Truthfully he had been sticking his fingers in the jar to eat it raw earlier.

“…it’s weird.”

A teasing tone came from your voice as you nudged your shoulder with his.

“Can’t be weirder than eating peanut butter with your fingers.”

“Hey!” An offended lilt heard from Mikey. But it couldn’t be helped!

“Just kidding..” “Mostly..” You offered as a compromise. His head tilted from side to side, seeming to let it go in favor of the initial conversation.

“Well, I was just thinking about how we’re all gonna die one day.” Now you hadn’t been expecting that. Not at all. Mikey had his weird quips. But this was darker than most! You wondered if his favorite pizza place had been demolished again offhandedly before saying the first word that came to your mind.

“Oh?” But it didn’t stop there!

“And that, I’d just hope you’d be around when it happens for me.”

Now that was just too much. It was sad. It was sweet. It was all wrapped up in emotions that had you looking Mikey in the eyes, pb fingers and all and giving him a small smile.

“Damn..” Again you were at a lack of words here. You wished you could say more. In fact you should’ve just said, ‘same’ or ‘me too Mikey’ or anything other than something so meaningless.

“Yeah, weird right?” He didn’t seem put off by your lack of response. His eyes had met yours, returning the smile before looking back down at his food. Taking another bite.

“A little, but not the strangest thing ever.” Which was true. You had to endure Leo after all. And he said random shit all the time. Though not as philosophical. Maybe Donnie would be closer to this category.

“Also!” Mikey spoke up around his bite.

“Oh there’s more?” You pop the last bite into your mouth. Dusting off the crumbs on your fingers on the paper plate below. Reaching for the bottle of water that had sat untouched since the two of you had sat down for the midnight snack.

“Yeah! I was also thinking about how life goes by super fast, and all the good moments too, it’s the bad ones that tend to drag out. I just wonder why that is.” This was longer, and even more confusing than the first.

“Hmm” Your eyebrows went together, thinking of what to say. Holding off for longer than before. But your mind was still blank. The thoughts weren’t weird, in fact you felt they were true. But..“I couldn’t even begin to try and pretend that I know the answer,”

“Yeah,” Mikey sighed in agreement. It was something he couldn’t answer too.

“And another thing!”

It seemed Mikey was on a roll tonight. You propped your elbow up on the table. Letting your hand cup your cheek as you leaned into it. Pushing the paper plate away from underneath you. “Mhm?” You listened intently. Well you thought you had been. Because you got some words but not the others as you watched his eyes rather than his lips.

You caught words like, “face” “happiness” “realize” It all didn’t really make much sense. But his eyes, the way they lighted up as you paid attention. It was so endearing. Unlike the rest of him that was green and orange, and okay he had splashes of other colors with his stickers too. But his eyes. They held a mixture of such a striking red and a mellow amber. It was far from anything you had ever seen, much like the turtle himself. Entrancing.

“You didn’t hear a word I just said did you?” He mused. And you were caught red handed as you sheepishly tried to play it off, listing the words you did catch with a bit of embarrassment. “Well that just won’t do, listen close okay?” Mikey said and his hands went up as if to cup your face, but he still had peanut butter covering them so instead you held onto his wrists, nodding in confirmation.

“Do you realize that you have the most beautiful smile? The one when you’re especially happy?” You squeezed his wrists, giving him a rueful expression. Was he being serious? Of course he was! He was smiling at your bashfulness, but nothing in his stare said he was playing you. “Thanks for enlightening me,” you say, though the blush can’t be helped.

“Your welcome!” And he had the audacity to wink as he took one peanut butter covered finger and stuck it in his mouth. You blinked. How could he go from borderline flirting to— to?!? Whatever he was doing now??? Eating obliviously?? It was times like these where you wondered. The lower half of your face hidden behind a hand pressed against your mouth. Trying to cover that embarrassingly bright blush. You wondered if Mikey actually did know what he was doing, and he was just a damn good actor at pretending not to know.

As you recomposed yourself, lost in thoughts like those. You didn’t pay any mind to Mikey turning slightly to the side and winking at no one in particular.

Yeah he knew. And yeah he does it on purpose.

;D

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