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falling-pages · 4 years ago

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Won’t they?

Here is my first post for @ohshc-week

I’m a little late due to some writer’s block (which is still inflicting me) so this one shot is thoroughly unedited. Please be nice and show me some grace when reading :) Gosh, this is messy.

Title: Won’t They?

OHSHC fan fest Day 1

Found Family Dynamics

Characters: Tamaki (main), hosts (mentioned)

Word Count: 1,332

Genre: Angst

Warnings: Kidnapping, light violence

- Harsh white light blinded Tamaki as soon as he opened his eyes. The dark fabric that had covered them was ripped away, leading to a starkly-contrasting massive shining lightbulb less than a foot away. He lurched his hands up to shield his eyes, but his wrists tugged against plastic, ripping and tearing at his skin.

He looked down to see his hands bound to the arms of a chair by zip ties, cutting into his flesh so deeply to already leave marks. His legs were no better off; stripped of their shoes, fastened to their respective legs of the chair, he was trapped, helpless, unable to escape.

His mouth was free, he noticed, as a whimper crawled up the back of his throat and strayed from his lips. The back of his throat scalded in pain, the rough, dry muscle hacking to produce any moisture at all. Combined with the light shooting daggers into his eyes, he felt a nasty headache brewing in his head.

He didn’t remember how he had gotten tied to this chair, only waking up to darkness and numbness over his limbs. He had half a mind to think it was a dream, the overstimulation of a series of nightmarish events. If he turned over and went back to sleep, maybe he would wake up and the headache would be gone.

“Welcome, Mr. Suoh.”

The thick gravity of a voice struck his hurting head like a thunderbolt. Fresh pain washed over him as the light was turned slightly away, scraping along the edge of its stand. By the sound of it, it was a lamp. And by what little he could see of the offending room, he was in a bunker. Grimy walls, cool water dripping down the sides, the soundproof absorption swallowing his heartbeat as it pounded in his ears.

It did no good to scream, but Tamaki tried anyways. His vocal chords curdled against the harsh wish, but all he could muster in his dehydrated state was a meek grunt.

“You think you can scream?” the voice said again. “You think your little friends are looking for you and will come rescue you?”

Tamaki swallowed, desperately reaching into his heart and mind to call on the other hosts. Below ground, there was no way to tell what time it was, or even if it was day or night. Maybe a whole other day had passed--he didn’t know how long he had been knocked out for--but with enough time gone by, surely they would miss him?

“It’s too bad.” The voice, manly, deep, rough, suddenly came from behind him. Tamaki saw the lamp swirling on the table, manipulated by a ghostly hand, and jumped when he felt the person’s voice dip into his ear. “No one can hear you scream.”

“What do you want?” Tamaki croaked. HIs red, raw hands scraped against the metal arms, fingernails chipping as they dug for purchase to counterweigh the pressure. Without his shoes, his slick socks couldn’t stabilize on the cement floor enough to wiggle out.

The man chuckled, returning the lamp to its previous place. He stepped in front of his captive, twirling the blindfold around a finger. He didn’t wear a uniform, but as Tamaki squinted he could see something stitched onto a breast pocket in cordial white letters.

“They said you weren’t very bright, Mr. Suoh, but I didn’t expect you to be stupid.”

The voice had a sharp grin in it, a tone meant for digging a knife into a chest. Tamaki had always imagined that voice when reading crime stories or watching murder documentaries. He had never wanted to, but Haruhi said she was interested, so he turned it on.

There was only one thing that man would want, and Tamaki knew it.

“The funds aren’t in my name yet,” he whispered, wetting his lips. “My father only just died a couple of days ago--and I’m not yet a legal adult. It will be at least a year before that account is unlocked and I can access the money.”

A hand came down and slapped him hard enough to see stars. Fingers gripped his hair and pulled his head back, exposing his throat to the open air. He scrambled to keep his balance, letting out a guttural cry. The man above him leered. Like holding a magnifying glass above a beetle stuck on its back, waiting for the sun to hit the right angle.

“I can wait.”

Chills raced down Tamaki’s spine. The man hurled Tamaki’s head forward, tipping the chair dangerously forward. Tamaki tensed in preparation for hitting the floor face-first, but he never made it--the man grabbed him again and settled the chair onto its four legs.

“As much as I would love to see your face shatter against my feet, I need you alive,” he grumbled. “They will have no motivation if you are dead.”

Fear pierced Tamaki’s very core. “What?”

“Your little group of friends.”

“What are you doing with them?”

“Nothing, yet.” The man paced. “That’s why you’re here. As much as I could make off of your inheritance, all six of you are worth more. You’re the bait to draw them in.”

“But--”

“Before you protest, the commoner is of no use to us,” he said. “She will be dealt with.”

“No!”

Tamaki thrashed in his chair, bucking his wrists against his bonds until the skin broke and blood slipped to coat the arm. He finally found the strength to scream, and he did until his lungs dried out--and his captor let him.

“Do you really think your little family can hear you all the way down here?” he sneered. “They can’t hear you. No one can.”

“But they’re my family. They will come for me,” Tamaki panted. “I--I know they will.”

Despite his hopeful tone, he felt the dark evil in what the man would say next.

“Will they? Are you sure?”

Tamaki shook his head, clenching his eyes shut. He pictured each of his friends in his mind. Rolling over how much he loved them, how he treasured them, how they became friends. They would come for him. Of course they would.

Won’t they?

“Because,” the man said, “I’ve held you here for three days, even sent urgent instructions to them, and they have not yet replied. No armies have come to break down this door. No friend has replied to my ransom note.” He leaned down into Tamaki’s face, allowing him his first good look at the monster. Dank breath and dark eyes were all he could focus on as tears streamed down his cheeks, soothing the burn where the man had struck him.

“Because, Mr. Suoh,” the man whispered, pinching Tamaki’s chin between his fingers, “found family means nothing when it comes to exterminating the weakest link.”

“That’s not true,” Tamaki gasped, but even as he muttered the words he could feel a fraction of hope dying. Why hadn’t they come for him? The host club had always been his family, especially after his father just passed. They loved him, didn’t they? Weren’t they worried? Or were they relieved that their obnoxious king had disappeared?

“If that’s what you want to believe, then by all means.” The hand disappeared from his face. “If I’m right, then I’ll just have one handsome allowance. But if I’m wrong--if they are your family--if the love that you speak of really does hold so true--then I’ll have six ransoms. Family or not, I win.”

Tamaki wept, too sad and tired and scared to even resist when the man tied the blindfold back over his eyes. His heart ached for his friends, wanting them but at the same time hoping they would stay far, far away. Just before a final blow knocked him unconscious again, he heard the man speak into his ear.

“Which is worse, Mr. Suoh? Having your family die for you, or never having one to begin with?”

#ohshcweek #tamaki suoh #ouran high school host club #ohshc #kyoya ootori #haruhi fujioka #hikaru hitachiin #kaoru hitachiin #takashi morinozuka #Mitsukuni Haninozuka #tw kidnapping #tw violence

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kasdeyathebitterwoman · 5 years ago

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Running Mate - Part 10

Here we are, folks! Part 10 of the series!! I’m so happy with the response to this whole series! Please let me know if you’ve got any ideas, suggestions, or if you’d like to be included in the tag’ list!

Word Count: 4,446

CW: none, fluffy!

taglist:

@maeleeme @andyrazzledazzle @oddsnendsfanfics @henrycavillluv32 @blossom-a @jhenno2002 @xceafh @severuined @queenslandlover-93 @thummbelina @chamomilebottom @fanfictionaddiction99 @deep-in-my-thoughts13

The days by yourself in your flat after Cannes and Jersey were some of the hardest you’d experienced in a while. You were going through extreme Henry withdraws. You missed the way he hummed to himself while he did anything. Mostly you missed his presence. Henry, though large and apparent as he was, had a calming, easy going nature about him. Rarely did anything affect him so much that he flew off the handle or outraged him in any way. You, on the other hand, were generally a case of nerves covered up with sarcasm and wit.

To deal with your lack of Henry, you dumped yourself into work. While you were away, James acquired more footage that needed to be scrubbed, color corrected, and catalogued. So, you got to work. In the mornings, you would go for a short run, get dressed in comfortable clothes, edit for hours, break for lunch, go back to editing, and only stop when your eyes felt like they were literally on fire. Slowly, you were realizing this way of life was starting to weigh on you. It wasn’t that you didn’t love your life, you absolutely did. But since meeting Henry, you were beginning to feel things you had never experienced before. For the first time ever, you were thinking about the future.

Occasionally, you dared sneak a peek online. The rumor mill spread theories about your relationship with Henry like wildfire. All the theories made you laugh, but what was really eating at you was the lack of communication from National Geographic. Over two weeks ago, James had sent in the beginnings of your proposal for a documentary with them and nothing. Not a peep or a confirmation or anything.

“You need to focus on something else,” Henry said to you one day. He’d come by to pick you up with Kal and the three of you went for a walk. Holding his hand, you instantly felt better, but the nerves were still there.

“I know, that’s what I’ve been trying to do,” you said. You’d explained to Henry all the work you had been doing for James since getting back, but it didn’t seem to help much.

“Well maybe figuring out what you want for your birthday will help,” Henry offers and you glance at him, scoffing a little.

“I already told what I want,” you reply.

“I’m not buying you that t-shirt,” Henry says firmly and you feign mock indignation. The other day you found a woman that will print just about anything on a t-shirt. You put together what ‘Unidentified Woman’ would look like and sent it to Henry as a gift idea. Clearly, he still wasn’t buying into it.

“I don’t know why,” you say, but Henry cuts you off.

“Because it’s ridiculous and you’re going to wear it in public,” he says to you. He’s trying so hard to be serious, but you can see the smile pulling at the corners of his lips.

“That’s the point!” you exclaim, but Henry just rolls his eyes and chuckles a little. “Okay, fine, what about the keychain?” you ask, reminding him of keychain option. He snorts.

“I might consider that,” he says. “But that can’t be your only gift,” he adds.

“Why not?” you whine, dramatically sticking your bottom lip out. Henry sees you and a massive grin breaks out across his face.

“I want to get you something special,” he says, smiling at you.

“What have I done to suggest that either the t-shirt or keychain would not make feel special?” you ask emphatically.

“God, you’re ridiculous,” Henry snorts, rolling his eyes. You beam up at him.

“It’s part of my charm,” you say, smiling wide and a little awkwardly.

“It’s something, but it ain’t charm,” Henry says, glancing at you sideways.

“Won you over, though, didn’t I?” you point out.

“The jury’s still out,” Henry replies and you bark with laughter. After walking around with Henry and Kal, you find yourself back in your home office. You’re reviewing footage that James had sent you, but your mind keeps thinking about that proposal. You grab your phone and check it every five minutes. You do that for an hour before you practically toss your phone in the drawer and decide that if you haven’t heard anything in three weeks, by your birthday, you were just going to move on.

In three weeks time, when you still hadn’t heard anything, you began to feel discouraged. Though you were still getting plenty of work through James and other clients, you were feeling as though something was wrong. While you did your best, Henry noticed the subtle changes in your behavior. You were quieter then usual and generally less sarcastic. It pain him to see you this way, but he was sure the birthday surprise he had planned for you would brighten your spirits. The morning of your birthday, Henry calls you.

“Well good morning, sugar,” you say, answering the phone. Though it was relatively early, you were already up and working. Henry could hear you typing.

“Good morning, beautiful,” he replies. “And happy birthday,” he adds. You can hear the excitement in his voice and it makes you smile.

“Thank you,” you say, feeling genuine happiness. An email notification pops up on your computer screen so you click on it. “Holy crap,” you mutter, seeing the subject line.

“What?” Henry asks, concerned.

“Uh, hold please,” you say, keeping the phone to your ear. Silently, you read through the email.

Dear Y/n,

This is Jonathan with the London National Geographic office. We received your proposal example for the project we discussed. Our office has had a chance to review it and we would like to make you a formal offer. If you accept, you will have complete access to our libraries and database for further research and development. Please respond to this email or contact me at the number listed below to move forward with this contract. I look forward to hearing from you.

Best,

J.P.

You read through the email three more times before you realize you’re crying.

“Holy crap, holy crap, holy crap,” you mutter, staring at the screen.

“Babe, what’s going on?” Henry asks.

“I got it,” you whisper, still in disbelief. “I got it. I got the contract,” you say louder.

“What?” Henry asks, surprised.

“I’m going to work with National Geographic. I’m going to Peru!” you exclaim, jumping up from your computer. “Holy crap!” you yell, dancing around your office.

“Y/n, that’s amazing!” Henry exclaims through the phone. “I told you you’d get it!” he points out and you laugh.

“Oh my gosh, I have to call James!” you say suddenly. Henry chuckles.

“Tell him in person. He and I planned to celebrate your birthday today,” Henry explains. “I’ll meet you at his house in an hour,” he says.

“Okay,” you reply wistfully. When you hang up with Henry, you stand in your office dumbstruck. You can’t believe that you did it. You got the job. Wiping away the tears that have fallen down your face, you dart off into your bedroom to start getting dressed. Forty five minutes later, you are driving through the country side on the way to James’ house. There is a smile that hasn’t left your face since you read that email and you couldn’t wait to tell James.

When you pull up to the house, you see that Henry has beaten you there. He’s getting out of his car right as you pull up. You’ve barely put your car in park and turned it off before you are dashing out of the car and flying across the gravel to him.

“Hey!” he exclaims, beaming as you practically float above the ground. As soon as you are close to him, you jump into his arms. Henry wraps those solid arms around your frame, lifts you, and spins you around right there in the driveway. You giggle as you kiss him passionately. Henry sets you down and smiles down at your beaming face.

“I got the contract,” you state, looking up at his familiar and loving eyes. “I am going to work with National Geographic. I am going to make a documentary with National Geographic. I am going to make a documentary with National Geographic in Peru,” you stop to take in a breath, realizing just how much is about to change. Henry places his hands gently on either side of your face.

“I knew you would get it,” he says quietly and don’t even try to stop the smile that forms on your lips. “Now, come on,” he says, letting go of your face and taking a hold of your hand. “We have a birthday to celebrate,” he pulls you towards James’ house. You smile at his back, feeling incredible. There is nothing in the world that could possibly top the high you are experiencing in this moment. Oh how wrong you were.

Henry steps aside and lets you open the door. Confused, you oblige, but almost dart right back out due to fear. The moment you cleared the doorway, several voices called out, “Happy birthday!” startling you. As soon as you regain your composure, you look around and realize your family is here. Jeremy and his wife; Kevin and his girlfriend; Kyle and his boyfriend; your parents.

“WHAT?!” you screech, looking around with your hands over your mouth.

“What’s up, booger,” Kevin calls out and you stare at him, dumbfounded.

“Kevin,” you mom says disapprovingly. She steps towards you with her arms out. “Hi, baby,” she says, pulling you in for a hug. You wrap your arms around her and take in her scent. You mom smelled like vanilla and grass and it was the most amazing thing ever.

“Hi momma,” you murmur. She squeezes you a little then lets you go. Right behind her is your dad, who quietly pulls you in for a hug.

“When did you get here? How did you get here?” you ask, looking from her to your dad. They smile at you, then look to Henry. You turn to him, the question in your eyes.

“Happy birthday, y/n,” he says simply, smiling warmly at you. You smile at him with tears in your eyes. You reach out and hug him tightly. Letting go of the hug, you escort him around the room, making the rounds and introducing him to everyone. You start with your parents.

“Henry, this is my mom, Helen and my dad, Thomas,” you explain, pointing to each respectively. With a warm smile, Henry shakes their hands.

“It’s so nice to meet you, Henry,” Helen says and you nod.

“Yeah, thanks for doing this for us,” Thomas adds and you realize you don’t know who planned this.

“Speaking of, can someone please explain to me how you came to be here?” you ask and Henry smiles wide. Before he can say anything, though, Kyle answers.

“Well, when a mommy and a daddy love each other very much,” he begins. Henry is already laughing, but you are rolling your eyes.

“Henry, this is my brother Kyle,” you say. “He’s the weird one,” you state and Kyle scoffs.

“You’re one to talk,” he retorts, rolling his eyes at you.

“Y/n, Kyle,” your mom starts, disapprovingly. “Henry, I’m so sorry, they are always bickering,” she says, looking pointedly at the two of you.

“It’s not my fault he always starts things,” you say as Kyle scoffs.

“Oh, puh-lease,” Kyle proclaims. “You always start it,” he points a finger at you.

“Get your finger out of my face,” you say cooly.

“It’s not in your face,” Kyle replies, still pointing.

“Yes, it is,” you say, batting away his finger. Huffing, Kyle slaps at your hand resulting in the two of you getting into a hand slapping fight. Helen and Thomas laugh and look at Henry with an apologetic look.

“Alright, knock it off,” Thomas demands after a moment and the two of you stop. You and Kyle are huffing slightly, though also giggling at the same time. Moments later, Marshall, Kyle’s boyfriend saddles up to the four of you, introducing himself to Henry. When you catch a break, you pull Henry toward your older brother Jeremy.

“Henry, this is Gary, my older brother,” you say, smiling wide at him. Jeremy rolls his eyes and shakes his head.

“Hi, I’m Jeremy,” he says to Henry, overemphasizing the pronunciation of his name. “Y/n still calls me Gary because she couldn’t say Jeremy when she was little,” he explains and Henry chuckles, bobbing his head in understanding.

“She also couldn’t say ‘Burger King’,” Kevin says, stepping next to Jeremy. “She kept calling it ‘Booger King’, so we just started calling her booger,” he states, smiling devilishly at you.

“Ha. Ha,” you bark, snarling at Kevin. Jeremy shakes his head at you and sighs. Avoiding a fight with Kevin, you make a point to introduce Henry to Rebecca - Jeremy’s wife and Ellen - Kevin’s girlfriend. Everyone greets Henry with warmth and kindness. The rest of the morning you spend your time joking with your brothers and checking to make sure Henry was okay. Your family almost loses it when you announce that you have landed a contract with National Geographic. Though you can’t go over the details, they are thoroughly impressed. That admiration takes a quick nose dive moments later as Kevin and Kyle make a point to incessantly tease you about it. Eventually, your mom makes it clear she wants to do something that will prevent you and your brothers from fighting. Already, you and Kevin had gotten into a battle of wits which ended up in a yelling match.

“You’re not my favorite person today,” you bark at Kevin.

“I’m not your favorite person any day,” he replies and you just sneer at him, getting ready to reply, but your mom intervenes.

“Enough! Goodness, y’all are meaner than hornets in a coke can!” she exclaims. Her cute sayings always have a way of softening even the hardest of the hard. You glance at Kevin who gives you a look that asks for a truce. You nod gently in agreement. “How about we give our gifts to y/n?” Helen glares pointedly at Kevin. He agrees and makes the announcement to everyone what is going on. Everyone runs to their luggage to get what they need, then reconvene in James’ living room. Your parents start by handing you a heavy box. Opening it, you find a framed review about your documentary in the West Virginia Times.

“Holy shi-,” you begin to say before cutting yourself off. “This is amazing!” you show Henry who admires it before passing it to James. You jump up and hug your parents, thanking them profusely for the gift. Next, Jeremy hands you a small box covered in Superman wrapping paper. “Oh my gosh,” you mutter, laughing as you show Henry.

“The girls bought it for you,” Jeremy explains. “And Dylan picked out the wrapping paper,” he adds. Opening the gift, you find a large heart shaped locket.

“Awww,” you pull it out to show everyone who also coo at the costume jewelry. Putting it on, your mom snaps a picture of it as does Becca, so she can show the girls later. Kevin and Ellen hand you a small box as well. Inside is a beautiful journal that Ellen admits is handmade by Kevin. He smiles sheepishly as you admire the leather bound book with pride. Kyle gives you a family portrait that he drew and framed. Marshall gives you a hilarious Dolly Parton salt and pepper shaker that he found in an antique store in Austin. James hands you his gift, which is a framed poster for your movie that was sent to the different film festivals. You show your mom who wipes away tears as she hands it to your dad. Finally, it’s Henry’s turn. He hands you what appears to be a t-shirt box wrapped in lavender paper, your favorite color. Tearing open the box and seeing what’s inside you begin to laugh hysterically. Turning the box around you show your family a stack of Superman comic books.

“I’m helping to round out her collection,” Henry explains sending you into another fit of hysterical laughing. Your family laughs along with you, though a little confused since they aren’t aware of the context. While you laugh, your mom gets up and moves into the kitchen. She comes out with a chocolate cake covered in frosting and candles. While eating, Henry chats with Jeremy, explaining that he got you the comic books to make up for the overwhelming Batman collection.

“That’s probably my fault,” Jeremy replies. “I was a huge fan of the Adam West Batman show growing up. I kind of forced her to watch with me,” he says and Henry chuckles.

“I’m actually a fan of Batman as well,” he says to a surprised Jeremy. “Yeah, I grew up reading all the comic books. My brothers and I were obsessed with Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman - all of them,” he says. Jeremy nods in agreement. A commotion cuts through the conversation as everyone turns to see you and Kyle wrestling over something. Kyle gets the drop on you and ends up half sitting, half laying on your back.

“UGH!” you scream. “You’re crushing my spleen!”

“You don’t even know where your spleen is,” Kyle retorts before getting off of you. Jeremy chuckles and shakes his head.

“Those two,” he mutters mostly to himself, but also to Henry.

“All of you, but those two specifically, remind me of my own brothers and I,” Henry states and Jeremy laughs.

“Constant chaos and blood?” Jeremy asks and Henry snorts.

“Pretty much,” He says, laughing.

“How many brothers do you have?” Jeremy asks.

“Three older and one younger,” he says. Jeremy looks at him wide eyed.

“Five boys?” he hisses after doing the mental math. “Well shoot, I thought we were trouble with three, but five?” he repeats. Henry laughs and nods his head.

“Yeah, the uh, the Cavill boys were known pretty well across the island,” Henry says, chuckling. The two watch as Thomas steps over to where Kyle and you are, giving the two of you stern, disapproving looks. You trot over to Jeremy and Henry, obliging your dad’s orders to walk away.

“Hey, what are y’all talking about?” you ask.

“Jeremy’s just telling me all of your embarrassing stories,” Henry says, giving you a haughty look.

“Ha!” you bark. “Jeremy doesn’t even know half of them!” Jeremy shakes his head slightly.

“I don’t even want to know the half I already know,” he states and you bob your head. Henry chuckles, shaking his head at you. The day progresses with you and Henry having varying conversations with just about everyone in your family. You chat with Rebecca about the kids and with Ellen about teaching. Kyle tells you about the different art projects he’s been commissioned to create as well as the gallery Marshall is hosting for him later in the year. Eventually, someone convinces Jeremy to bring out the guitar.

“Jeremy was basically a musical prodigy, but he wanted to do more than pluck guitar strings, so he became a firefighter,” you explain to Henry, who watches your brother with new admiration. Sitting on the couch, Jeremy tunes his guitar while everyone murmurs. Then he plays a few strings effortlessly, before looking around the room.

“What would you like to hear?” he asks. No one says anything at first, so Jeremy just starts playing. It takes you a second to get the song in your head, but soon you realize he’s playing a Los Lonely Boys song. “Blame it On Love” to be exact. Knowing the song well, you harmonize with him as he plays and sings with ease. You catch a glimpse of Henry out of the corner of your eye. He’s watching you sing, a small smile teasing the corners of his mouth. When Jeremy finishes the first song, you feel Henry’s eyes boring into you.

“I didn’t know you could sing,” he murmurs, looking down at you surprised.

“Not really,” you reply and hear Jeremy snort.

“That’s a load of bull,” he calls out, thumbing a few strings. “Y/n performed in her 8th grade talent show with this song right here,” he states, beating the opening bars of “Born To Fly” by Sarah Evans on the base of the guitar. You tip your head back and laugh deeply before singing along to one of your favorite songs from your childhood. Your brothers join in when necessary to harmonize, adding layers to the impromptu mini-concert. Occasionally, you’d catch Henry’s eye. You could see him watching you with awe the entire time and you feel yourself turning red as you continue. When it’s done, everyone claps and again, you feel Henry’s eyes boring into you. As inconspicuous as possible, you glance at Henry. He’s beaming at you in a way that sends a wave of heat throughout your body.

“That was incredible,” Henry says to you excitedly. You feel your cheeks burn bright with embarrassment. “Did you win?” he asks, looking between you and Jeremy.

“Nah, I lost out to Rachel Lipinski,” you say, rolling your eyes. “All because she grew two cup sizes one month before the talent show,” you mutter and Henry chuckles at you. Jeremy plucks at the strings a little before starting “You Make it Easy” by Jason Aldean. You see Henry perk up with recognition and you watch as he mouths along to the words. Feeling bold, you stand up, tugging on his hand and pull him up with you. There, in front of your family, you dance and sway to the melody, holding Henry close to you. Pretty soon, your parents, Kevin and Ellen, as well as Kyle and Marshall have joined you. You are all dancing while Jeremy plays. “Best birthday ever,” you murmur, leaning your head onto his chest. He smiles softly, kissing the top of your head.

After Jer is done playing, everyone agrees it’s time for dinner. Henry suggests everyone get dressed up to go out to a restaurant in London. Despite trying to get your family to disagree with this idea, they think Henry’s suggestion is a great idea. You squint at him as your family rushes around the house to get ready.

“Henry, I know you paid to get everyone here,” you say to him, low. “This is too much,” you add. Henry cocks his head, looking at you with a slightly bemused look.

“Are you happy?” he asks.

“I mean, yes, but,” you huff, ready to argue more, but Henry reaches down, pulling your hand up to his lips.

“If you are happy, then all of this is worth every penny spent,” he murmurs, grazing his lips across your knuckles. Those blue eyes watch as you take a deep breath in and shift on your feet.

“This is a lot of money,” you whine.

“And I have a lot of money to spare,” he replies. You stare up at him, rolling your jaw, trying to come up with a comeback. Unfortunately, you are coming up short. Henry can see the inner battle you are having with yourself. He takes your hand and places it on his shoulder then brings your other arm up as well. “I know how much I’m spending. My intent isn’t to make you uncomfortable, but to make you happy,” he explains quietly. You sigh.

“I know,” you reply, feeling guilty. “I’m just not used to this level of attention. I’m very,” you pause, searching for the word you want to use.

“Stubborn? Hard-headed? Ridiculous?” Henry offers, raising an eyebrow at you.

“Independent,” you say through gritted teeth. He smirks.

“You know, you’d feel a lot better if you would just let me take care of you,” Henry states. Your jaw drops open.

“I do let you take care of me!” you exclaim and Henry bellows.

“You typically fight me tooth and nail,” he laughs. You scrunch your nose up at the statement. “Now, come on. Go back to your flat, get dressed, and I’ll pick you up,” he brushes your cheek. Twitching your nose, you stand up on your tiptoes to kiss him. He smiles at you as you walk away to head back to your flat. Henry picks you up about an hour later and drives you to the restaurant. Dinner with your family is a complete success. Everyone has fun eating, laughing, and teasing you about, well, everything. After dinner, everyone hugs and says goodbye. You make plans with your family to see them again tomorrow, then leave with Henry.

“I have something else for you,” Henry says when it’s just the two of you. You look up at him confused. From behind his back, he produces a small bag. “I’m pretty sure I’ll be off filming by the time our anniversary comes around," he explains as he hands you the bag. “So this is one part birthday, one part anniversary gift,” he says. Seeing the size of the bag, you gasp.

“Is this my keychain?” you whisper emphatically.

“No,” Henry chuckles.

“Well shucks, sugar,” you say. “Now I feel bad. I didn’t get you anything,” you glance up at Henry who is watching you intently.

“Your answer will be my gift,” he replies, low. You look up at him confused, but then proceed to open the gift. From the bag, you produce a small box. Your breath catches in your throat as you begin to imagine what small, shiny, circular item could be inside. Opening the lid, you don’t see what you expected. Instead, you see a set of house keys. You look up at Henry even more confused. “I know you said to wait until our anniversary, but as I said,” he trails off. You look back down at the keys as you realize what he’s asking you. “Will you move in with me?” he whispers. Your head snaps up and you look into his eyes.

“Yes,” you whisper. You can see tears in the corners of his eyes as a wide, beautiful smile breaks out across his face. “Yes,” you repeat louder. Henry responds by wrapping his arms around you and picking you up. The two of you are laughing as he spins you around for the second time that day. “Although, you missed a perfectly good opportunity for that keychain,” you state, coming up from a passionate kiss. Henry simply grunts as he carries you back to the bedroom.

#henry cavill #henry cavill one shot #one shot #fanfic #fanfiction #writing #henrycavillxreader #henrycavillxfemmereader #running mate series #running mate story

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iggy-theeskimo · 4 years ago

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Thanks for the tag sweetie @he4rtofsteel💖✨

1. What are you wearing? Jeans that look like grandpa's jeans, a colorful crop top with a lilac knit sweater.

2. Ever been in love? Of course, Grace Slick, Brian Jones, David Gilmour, Syd Barrett, Nick Mason, David Bowie.

3. Ever had a terrible breakup? Yup.

4. How tall are you? 1,60cm (I don't know how much it would be in feet and inches, sorry)

5. How much do you weigh? Around 56kg.

6. Any tattoos you want? I would like it but I would have to think of a tattoo that I want too much, because I am very indecisive and it may be that after a while that tattoo does not mean anything to me, but I would like to tattoo an octopus on my left arm (like John Frusciante's, don't ask why).

7. Any piercings you want? For now, nah. Not my favorite thing.

8. OTP? A what? I'm🤡

9. Favourite show(s)? I don't watch a lot TV but I like That 70's Show, Seindfeld, The Office, Game of Thrones and a lot of varied documentaries.

10. Favourite band? My favorite bands always vary actually, but the one that I consider my favorite forever is Pink Floyd (I think it was obvious)

11. Something you miss? I miss being able to go to the outskirts of the city for a while, being among the mountains and putting my feet in the river, I hope I can do it again soon.

12. Favourite song(s)? Well, there are many but the ones I have been listening to often for now are: Wild World by Cat Stevens, My Sweet Lord by George Harrison, Always See Your Face by Love, See-Saw by Pink Floyd and I'd Rather Go Blind by Etta James.

13. How old are you? I turn 16 in a few days :)

14. Zodiac Sign? Virgo like Freddy Mercury and Roger Waters.

15. Hair Colour? Dark blonde but not so dark

16. Favourite Quote? Many. “Solo en sueños, en la poesía, en el juego —encender una vela, andar con ella por el corredor— nos asomamos a veces a lo que fuimos antes de ser esto que vaya a saber si somos” by Julio Cortázar in his book Rayuela. ("Only in dreams, in poetry, in games - lighting a candle, walking with it down the corridor - do we sometimes peek into what we were before being this, who will know if we are").

17. Favourite singer? Janis Joplin, Freddy Mercury, David Gilmour, Robert Plant, Judy Garland, Florence Welch, Joan Baez and surely I forget many.

18. Favourite colour(s)? Brown, dark green, yellow, gold, purple and silver.

19. Loud music or soft music? Both actually, quiet music low and hard music louder.

20. Where do you go when you’re sad? I like to be in nature (same as the girl who nominated me)

21. How long does it take you to shower? 30 minutes/one hour lmao, I like to take a relaxing bath but it depends on how long I have.

22. How long does it take you to get ready in the morning? 20 or 30 minutes.

23. Ever been in a physical fight? Nope, I'm pretty calm. In 2018 a classmate wanted to hit me after school for being a weirdo but I was able to stop the fight in time, something bad would have happened to me because I can't hit anyone ;)

24. Turn on(s)? Effective communicator, being kind to others, helping others, respectful towards others, someone who doesn’t like conflict and prefers peace, compassion, good sense of humour, groovy sense of style, good taste in music, non-verbal communication, respecting my need for space and respecting that I value my personal freedom, open minded but has their own opinions, willing to enlighten me, being able to let go and be free with me, piercing eyes, nice smile, being able to understand me (same as the girl who nominated me again)

25. Turn off(s)? Manipulation or toxic actions, being disrespectful, inappropriate jokes, believing that you are better than everyone, not being grateful, not respecting my personal space and personal things, etc, etc.

26. The reason I joined Tumblr? I wanted to get into a place where I can share my nonsense and taste, share ideas and jokes in a non-toxic place like Twitter. Luckily the people I have talked here are nice and the pink floyd community and other bands are pretty good💖✨.

27. Fears? Many people are afraid of the death of oneself but I am more afraid of the death of my loved ones, the ocean gives me a lot of panic (although I would love to dive) and I am afraid of being standing next to a statue or something carved with shape that is bigger than me, like the cat litter statues in Egyptian.

28. Last thing that made you cry? The movie about Judy Garland, gosh💔.

29. Last time you cried? Last night.

30. Meaning behind your URL? Iggy the Eskimo is the nickname of the naked girl who is in some photos of Syd Barrett's The Madcap Laughs, and I love her so much (not much of a story behind my URL really).

31. Last book you read? Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury, very good.

32. Last song you listened to? Green is the Colour by Pink Floyd.

33. Last show you watched? The Office.

34. Last person you talked to? My grandma or my boyfriend, I don't remember.

35. The relationship between you and the person you last texted? They are my grandmother and my boyfriend, I mean ?

36. Favorite food? Pasta :) if you want my heart just give me pasta. And I'm trying to start being a vegetarian.

37. Place you want to visit? I want to travel all the world really, but Greece, London, Scotland, India and Nordic countries are my fav.

38. Last place you were? The last place where I traveled? To Bariloche, south of Argentina in January of this year :)

39. Do you have a crush? Yup.

40. Last time you kissed someone? Some days ago i guess.

41. Last time you were insulted and what was it? It's weird that people insult me because I don't usually do bad things and mostly when I'm surrounded by people they rarely notice me, so I really don't remember when they last insulted me.

42. What color underwear are you wearing? Calm down honey

43. What colour shirt are you wearing? Multicolour, are these t-shirts that are dyed.

44. What colour bottoms are you wearing? Dark blue jeans.

45. Wearing any bracelets? Noup, although I usually wear some.

46. Last sport you played? Maybe volleyball in February at school (I probably played bad).

47. Last song you sang? I sing pieces of songs all day so I don't remember which one was the last one.

48. Last prank call you remember doing? Idk, maybe when I was younger and have friends.

49. Last time you hung out with someone? Loooooooooong time ago.

50. Favourite movie(s)? The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep, The Godfather (all), Judy, Rocketman, The Wall and many that I do not remember lol.

This took me a long time so if you read everything thank you💖I'm not sure if the people I'm nominating have already been nominated but

@artsyhippie @divine-and-decaying @whatdyoumean-interesting @herrmiu (only if you want to) and anyone who wants to ✨

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thegoddessprose · 5 years ago

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I’m a Virgo, so...

Different Types of Virgo 1, The CEOs sensitive but doesn’t show it rolling their eyes for your drama wears black clothes a lot “my time is precious” lets failures define their self-worth doesn’t give up easily 6/6 2, The Beauty Queen discounted clothes are the absolute best not gonna be anyone’s side hoe insecure with their looks perfectionist mentality congenial, tires to be kind not ashamed of their sexuality 2/6 3, The Motherly Type holds grudges makes sure you eat well underappreciated to the core tries to help you in any way possible patient but easily irritated gets excited when you ask them about something they’re a pro at 3/6 4, The Chill Intellectual thrifts clothing 4/20 friendly watched documentaries about topics has so many conspiracy theories doesn’t give a fuck, just wants to have some peace good grades without trying 3/6

When a Virgo Is Sad “I’ll joke about my pain haha” “Fuck I’m lonely” Stressing out for no reason Tries hard not to cry Still tryna be there for people “Wow, I’ve been made the bad guy again..nice” “No one appreciates me” In need of romance or just comfort?

Inside The Mind of a Virgo

You as a Friend Spamming memes Giving your friends life-changing advices You’re witty Trying your best to make time for friends So nice to everyone else but hard on yourself The biggest crackhead Would literally lock friends up if they try to text their exes

Five Things That Annoy You Always feeling like you’re self-inviting yourself to an event Being behind slow walkers in busy areas Deadlines on important tasks Ignorant people who think they’re smart “Just get over it, look on the brighter side”

Things You’ve Google Searched Before What do my dream mean? Pornhub Good sleep tips WebMD am I dying? Heartbreak music People falling over

Random Lush for cash Needing therapy Masking pain Being called the “office bitch” Being the mom friend Comfort food Laughing at who your exes downgraded to Overanalyzing everything people say to you You’re helpful People have called you cute before You can’t tolerate dumb people You can either be really friendly or would put a gun to people’s heads “Existence is pain” Just wanting to get shit done You have great problem-solving skills You’re passionate and hard-working You feel uncomfortable when people are too giving with you You’re anxious You’re friendly but skeptical Expecting the worst Very frequent mood changes You’re romantic lowkey Ghosting toxic people You take good photos You’re open to constructive criticism You’d do anything for family You like to get shit done asap Sad over childhood nostalgia Being a ride or die friend Personality over looks Wanting to be a kid again highkey Wanting to be in control Kinda patient You have to deal with idiots on a regular “Why the fuck aren’t the dishes arranged in alphabetical order?” “I literally did not ask for your opinion” Stressing out over nothing important “Gosh I should’ve stayed home today”

#survey #surveys #bold survey #virgo

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vostokovasmelina · 4 years ago

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hello again with non-secret non-santa! i think my favorite movie is a tie between the Black Cauldron and Fried Green Tomatoes. I haven't watched any new movies, so I've mostly been just going back to older ones that I very much enjoy! I have another question for you! What TV shows do you enjoy watching? Popular or not! Why? What in particular draws your eye or emotion to a show? I hope you have a wonderful day while being safe! - 💜

lmao i’m an uncultured swine and has never seen those movies - buT i do know what black cauldron is and i’m so proud of myself

about tv shows - i have severe commitment issues (alksjkfdhask) so i don’t really watch that many of them but the ones i watch i absolutely adore. i usually need someone to buddy watch it with me (usually my mum and/or bro) otherwise i’m not motivated enough. i binged peaky blinders in two weeks purely because of my mum. without her, i would still be stuck on season 2.

here are some i have sat through or like enough to actually remember to watch them lmao:

killing eve - probably my most favourite tv show like ever. i’m not so vocal about it tho so even i forget sometimes how much i actually love it but it’s just the best thing ever made :))

wayne - the end of the f***ing world but american and better? idk man it’s just the second coolest show ever

fleabag - i adore pwb and this shit is the most relatable thing ever

bodyguard - i’ve watched it like three times already and i still love it so much

atypical - i’m still on season 2 so no spoilers please but i love this show so much, it’s my safety blanket

the alienist - underrated piece of pure art

sex education - rewatching this with my brother was the best part of quarantine :’)

peaky blinders - duh

sharp objects - triggering as fuck but i love it and the book is also one of my favs

good omens - i’m still obsessed, i keep rewatching it and i’m even planning on rereading the book next year - help

broadchurch - i love david tennant and olivia colman so much, dude

the queen’s gambit - i lovelovelove anya taylor-joy and i loved the book so much and the show so didn’t disappoint wow the best thing that happened to us in 2020

honourable mentions: collateral; criminal: united kingdom; des (lmao i hate myself, i’m obsessed with british crime dramas way too much); over the garden wall; red band society; criminal minds; the witcher & one day at a time (i absolutely hate how they just cancelled it for good recently like wtf >:( )

i also like documentaries!! (true crime and history, mostly)

what draws my eye to a show? gosh, such a hard question, i really can’t tell. like, i usually go on netflix and see what’s up on there but i’m generally really picky and take the longest time to start a show even if i’m interested. what i know for sure is that i like anything dark and lowkey emotional (even though no media has made me cry in the last 4 years lmao) but i’m mostly into realistic stuff? like i watch and read much less fantasy/sci-fi than i used to and i’m lowkey sad about that so hit me up with your recommendations if you have any :D

(lmao i know i said i don’t watch many tv shows and then gave you a proper list but i swear i don’t have netflix on 24/7. i just find it hard to actually binge a tv show)

what about you, my dear secret santa? what kind of shows do you like and what is your absolute favourite? do our tastes overlap at all? <3

#ask #answered #impromptu santa #réka.txt

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themeatlife · 5 years ago

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the Meat Life Stay-At-Home Watchlist

Chronicling what I have watched or rewatched through the pandemic so far

The world has changed around us the last few months, particularly in the United States since March 11. With the lack of events to hit up, like most Americans I’ve been catching up on some watching through the various streaming services and my own digital copies of movies and shows.

I didn’t really think of keeping up with what I have been watching until just recently, but here is what I can remember hitting up so far since I’ve spent the majority of the time at home. Some are favorites that I would have watched anyway. Some were unfinished until I got a chance to get back to them. And others just became available.

Here’s what I remember of the watchlist:

The Office (Netfilx) This is a favorite of me and the wife. We watch this on the regular though. My wife uses The Office as her lullaby of sorts, putting it on in the evening as she gets ready for bed and is in bed to fall asleep. I did a post on the 15th anniversary, so I won’t really deep-dive.

Gossip Girl (Netflix) Another one that my wife rotates with The Office as her lullaby. The series is not bad, it’s basically The OC in Manhattan (both are created and developed by Josh Schwartz). It also takes on a new perspective when you think about star Penn Badgley is the creep in You. So Dan Humphrey gets this weird creeper Joe Goldberg vibe at times.

Parks and Recreation (Netflix) I never got into Parks and Rec on its original run. I was encouraged to check it out by some coworkers since I liked The Office. It is a great show, very funny, and poignant in a way. It feels like a throwback to when people could disagree politically and still get along. There is a lot less of that nowadays. We might need more Parks and Rec in real life. I started this right before the pandemic and finished around the beginning of things getting locked down.

Frozen II (Disney+) The sequel debuted on Disney+ early on in the quarantine period. My family enjoyed it. I thought it was entertaining, but I felt like it was weighted down a bit by the mythology explaining. It seemed too busy explaining a lot of things. Still an enjoyable movie, but the first is better.

Tiger King: Murder, Mayhem, and Madness (Netflix) Intriguing. The series debuted early in the quarantine period and became a staple of stay-at-home viewing and a runaway hit. Lots of WTF moments. It was like the train wreck analogy to the Nth degree. But you can tell it was made in a way that leans in favor of Joe Exotic, making him look like a victim in the last couple episodes. Also gave way to memorable memes ever since.

The Rocketeer (Disney+) I haven’t watched this movie since I was a kid. Looking back, you can see a lot of The Rocketeer in Captain America - The First Avenger. Easy to see though, since they share the same director Joe Johnston. Prior to America’s involvement in World War II, a movie star Nazi goes after an experimental rocket pack developed by Howard Hughes. The rocket pack is retrieved by accident from a down on luck stunt pilot. Fun movie.

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker (Disney+) I should have watched the entire Skywalker saga leading up to it, but I figured I have a ton of time to do that later. This was a May the 4th watch. I haven’t watched the Skywalker saga finale since it was in theaters. It’s not a bad movie, I just feel it could have been a lot better with some modifications here and there. Also, I believe this was going to be the Leia movie. The Force Awakens was Han’s swan song, as was The Last Jedi for Luke. I feel like this would have been great for Leia but obviously they were limited due to the untimely death of Carrie Fisher. The scene where Ren/Ben speaks with Han after battling Rey would have hit harder with Leia instead of Han.

Trolls: World Tour (VOD) Cute kid movie. Was nice to hear a lot of familiar music. Sucks that rock was the villain in the first couple acts. Seeing it once was enough, though. Like the first Trolls, I am glad my kids enjoyed it but did not participate in excessive multiple viewings.

Onward (Disney+) Didn’t get a chance to catch this at the theater before they closed them down. Great movie, but gosh. Why does Pixar always pull at the heart strings like that? I was quietly crying to myself at the end. I’m glad we made our living room dark theater-style, otherwise my kids would have seen me all torn up.

Fast and Furious 5-7 (Fast Five - HBO, The Fast and the Furious 6/Furious 7 - Digital) I ended up not watching the entire series. There is a great trilogy within the series, 5-7 was that trilogy. Fast Five was the best of the FF franchise and where it perfected their movie formula. It was like an action Ocean’s Eleven with cars. 6 and 7 expanded on that formula, upping the humor and ridiculousness factor. 6 had the exits of the Han and Gisele characters (they found a way to tie in Tokyo Drift to the rest of the series, Gal Gadot was on her way to becoming Wonder Woman for DC). And 7 had that great ending with the tribute to Paul Walker to the sounds of Wiz Khalifa and Charlie Puth.

Toy Story 4 (Disney+) Another Pixar hit. Didn’t hit me quite as hard as Onward or Toy Story 3 did emotionally, thank goodness. I thought this story was over the way Toy Story 3 ended. But Pixar did a good job adapting to prolong these characters stories. It did feel like it was a bit of two and three combined looking back. Still very good, Pixar knows what it’s doing.

The Marvel Infinity Saga (Disney+/Netflix/Digital) Leading up to the one-year anniversary of the release of Avengers: Endgame, I went through and rewatched all 23 MCU movies. This time, I went in chronological story order by starting with Captain America - The First Avenger. I chronicled the order I watched in my last post. Even after viewing many of these movies multiple times, I’m still amazed at how much I enjoy them and the scope of what Marvel was able to achieve leading into the climax in Endgame.

Community (Netflix/Hulu) I loved Community on its initial run on NBC but never watched any of the episodes when it was on Yahoo for its sixth season. It has been great to rewatch the meta-humor and sitcom trope parodies. And since Ken Jeong and Joel McHale started their own podcast called The Darkest Timeline (half COVID-19, half Community pod), it has been a good companion viewing.

The Back to the Future Trilogy (Netflix) Recent add to Netflix for easy viewing, these movies have been a favorite of the Mitra boys since childhood. Upon viewing as an adult, there is some humor that I didn’t recognize as a kid that is hilarious to me now. It is also crazy how well this teen time-travel sci-fi comedy works. Some of the effects in Part 2 are dated and 2015 didn’t quite end up the way it did in the movies. But overall very enjoyable on the rewatch!

Extraction (Netflix) High budget action flick funded by Netflix? Written by the Russo Brothers? And staring Chris Hemsworth? I’m in! Directed by long-time stunt man and Russo Bros go-to stunt coordinator Sam Hargrave (you can tell the Russo influence). It has an awesome 15ish minute one-shot action/chase sequence that is top notch. Don’t think much about the plot or the controversy of cultural representation, just enjoy the action.

The Mighty Ducks Trilogy (HBO) Another childhood favorite of mine. Nevermind that the hockey itself isn’t accurate. This is about pure fun for an hour and a half at a time. Come for the hi-jinx, stay for the heart. Triple-deke, knuckle-puck, taking out the trash. And leave it out on the ice!

The Harry Potter Series (Blu-Ray/Digital) This was not a go-to for me until Linda made me watch the entire series. I guess when the first movie came out, it was too much of a kid movie for me (I was a high school senior at the time). But from the second movie onward, it felt like the storytelling and movie making got better and better. The Deathly Hallows was an epic ending, even if they did change the ending from the book. I didn’t watch the newer Fantastic Beasts movies along with this though, my wife did.

Westworld - Season 3 (HBO) Recently got HBO back, so I caught up on Westworld Season 3. I haven’t rewatched the previous seasons yet, but I may revisit it soon. Season 1 was spectacular, Season 2 was confusing as hell but still entertaining. Season 3 is somewhere in between, expanding on the ongoing storyline. It was more straight-forward because its storyline is in the “real-world.” For those of you that have watched, didn’t you think it was highly ironic that the Incite ball was basically the AT&T logo? (AT&T is the parent company for WarnerMedia and HBO)

The Last Dance (ESPN/ESPN+) The Michael Jordan docu-series has been a god-sent for sports fans devoid of live American sports for the past couple months. Is it Jordan-biased? Sure. But it is full of drama and intrigue and full of nostalgia. The NBA had commissioned a camera crew to follow the 1997-1998 Chicago Bulls on their run for their sixth NBA championship. Jordan owned the controlling rights to the footage and unlocked it after the 2016 NBA Finals. So this documentary was years in the making and with the pandemic the release date was moved up. Although it featured a lot of unseen footage, it also chronicled the years leading up to the 1998 Bulls title. The last 5 Sundays have been awesome.

The Princess Bride (Disney+) I haven’t watched this movie since I was a kid. It wasn’t one of my recurring watches back then. So this was actually my second viewing of this movie ever. I found it quite enjoyable. It was cheesy, but fun, and a good family watch. One of the many older titles available on Disney+.

Scoob (VOD) My kids had some of the older Scooby Doo episodes on DVD and watched them when they were younger. This was a fun revisit for them and for us as parents. It was actually cool seeing a lot of the Hanna-Barbera characters in one movie. We watched this shortly after finishing Community, and my kids recognized Ken Jeong’s voice as Dynomutt. My daughter hilariously shouted “Senor Chang!” when she recognized him.

The Indiana Jones Series (Netflix) I introduced my son to Indiana Jones a few months ago watching Raiders of the Lost Ark. He loved it. He lost a little bit of interest during the Temple of Doom, I think the character Short Round lost it for him (character hasn’t aged well). The Last Crusade reclaimed his interest. Harrison Ford was at his natural apex playing Indiana Jones. I did not watch the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. I didn’t feel the need to revisit that installment, while it was enjoyable the alien ending ruined the lead up to it.

The Dark Knight Trilogy (Batman Begins/The Dark Knight - Hulu, The Dark Knight Rises - Digital) Every few years I try to revisit this series. It is the best thing DC has ever put out cinematically. While Begins and Rises is more comic book, TDK is a straight crime drama set in the world of Batman. My favorite is Rises, but the absolute best comic book movie remains The Dark Knight, even with the advent of the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

Jurassic Park/Jurassic World Series (Jurassic Park/The Lost World: Jurassic Park - Blu-Ray, Jurassic World - Digital, Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom - Cinemax) The original Jurassic Park is such a great movie. Rewatching, it’s crazy how well the effects for the dinosaurs hold up. Steven Spielberg, Stan Winston, and ILM did a great job mixing animatronic and CGI dino effects that stand the test of time. The Lost World was enjoyable but not as good as the original. I skipped JP III, such a bad movie. Jurassic World was a good way to reboot the series, basically a remake of the original but incorporating a lot of references to it. I just finished Fallen Kingdom today. Although Fallen Kingdom was entertaining, it fails to recapture some of the magic of JP and JW.

I’m not sure what I will hit up next. I might hit some Keanu Reeves movies like Speed, the Matrix Trilogy, and/or the John Wick Trilogy. Maybe Top Gun. Maybe rewatch Friends or How I Met Your Mother. Maybe something on HBO Max when it comes out like The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Maybe Terminator. Possibilities are endless, at least until some American sports return.

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xoexoxhoe · 6 years ago

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Monsta X Reacts: Baby’s First Words

@pckmx Request: “Monsta X reaction to his baby’s first words”

A/N: Ahhhh a Monsta X request! So happy! Here’s to all the monbebe’s out there! And thank you so much for the request girl, this was such a cute one to write! Hope ya’ll like it!

Monsta X & Y/N

Shownu:

Shownu was an amazing father, husband, and everything in between. When he’d come back from the studio, the first thing he’d do is greet you in the kitchen, and kiss your beautiful daughter who sat comfortably in the high chair next to the counter.

One night, you both were eating dinner, discussing what he should eat for his next episode of Nunu’s Yum Yum Yum. Of course, this happened every Sunday night, regardless if Shownu was eating or not, as he always thought of food.

He sat next to your baby, cutting her food for her and playing with her, making her laugh each time he’d put a chopstick on his lips while puckering them, holding it in place with his nose.

You couldn’t help but feel warm inside as he kept interacting with her. Tonight was your turn to clean the kitchen, and you cleared the table quickly, letting Shownu enjoy himself.

In the next two minutes, you heard Shownu begin shouting from the dining room. You dropped the dishes in the sink, turning around with soap covering your arms only to find Shownu with your baby in his hands, raising her above his head as if she’s Simba from ‘The Lion King’.

“Honey! She said- she said my name! She said ‘da-da’! I am Da-da!”

You turned back around to face the sink both in frustration and with laughter, hitting the counter, “Shownu, you gave me a heart attack- And, Honey, please don’t let our daughters head hit the ceiling.”

He slowly brought the baby back down, resting her on his muscular forearm, “But… she said da-da…”

Wonho:

Wonho never really wanted to get married, nor did he want children at first. But, as soon as he met you, things changed. He wanted kids, and he wanted an amazing life with you by his side.

When you both had your first baby boy, he was adorable and couldn’t contain his happiness. He laughed at the way your baby gripped his fingers, saying that he would be just as strong as him some day. When your baby cooed, he’d always sing and tell you, “Y/N, he’s gonna have the best voice, I can feel it.”

One night, Wonho came home late from the gym and his training. You had already began to put the baby to bed, but he insisted on carrying him around the house, calling it his ‘cool down’ after his workout.

You sat in your bedroom, folding clothes and watching a new tv show when Wonho came back into the room, handing you the baby.

“Babe, it talked.”

You looked at your little boy, laughing as he began to knock over your first pile of shirts, “Wonho, it’s a baby, they begin to talk around this age- and wait why did you say ‘it’ he has a name, babe, you gave it to him.” You giggled uncontrollably.

Wonho just shook his head furiously, “No ways! I refuse to believe it!” Tears started to stream down his face, “He’s growing up, and I don’t like it.”

Your baby babbled another word, this time saying ‘mama’ in a cute voice. Wonho tossed his head back, falling to the floor, “Look at him now! Talking back to you already! Oh my gosh! Say sorry to your mother right now!”

You couldn’t stop laughing for the rest of the night.

Minhyuk:

Minhyuk loved to sit in bed with your baby, holding an iPad for the both of them, watching the most obscure animal planet documentaries, history channel marathons, and anything that had education.

Minhyuk always talked to her, “This; this is a platypus, I don’t want you to touch it, alright?” Your baby would just look at her dad and smile, sometimes cry if he got really stern with his passion on how cute puppies were.

One day, you came home from work only to see him jumping up and down in the living room, screaming for you.

You ran in and he grabbed your wrist, telling you to jump with him. Your baby began to look at him, then to you, before babbling the words, “papa”.

You both turned to each other screaming, picking her up and running around the house with her, telling her to do it again, even though she began to cry once Minhyuk lifted her up and started singing. He handed her off to you and grabbed his phone, immediately videotaping her.

You both sat in bed with her for the next two hours, taking videos and listening to her babble even more words like ‘mama’, and ‘puppy’, to which your Minhyuk was quite happy.

He texted in the group chat with his fellow MX members, saying that your baby finally spoke. He constantly sent them videos and pictures of her saying puppy, telling the members that she’d make it on Ellen soon enough, only making your heart flutter even more.

He laid in bed with you that night, telling you about how he truly wished to hear her say platypus, only to which you replied that it would probably be too hard for her still.

The next morning, to no surprise, you found Minhyuk straining to teach your daughter the word platypus. “Repeat after me, baby. Pla-”

“Pa-”

“typus”

“pa”

He threw his arms up yelling, “Close enough! Honey, hurry up and grab the camera we’re taking this to Ellen!”

Kihyun:

Kihyun was a great dad, but throughout the entire time leading up to your baby’s first words, he always taught your child how to say ‘mama’.

You’d find him in the kitchen, singing to her the word ‘mama’ alone over and over again, always finding it really adorable yet strange how he was so eager for her to speak the word ‘mama’.

The day that she said her first words, you both were on the couch, talking about work while watching her play. She sat up and began saying ‘mama’ repeatedly, to which you started freaking out.

Kihyun’s face was filled with surprise, causing him to stand up and run in place, unsure of what he should do.

"Should I grab the recorder? Use my phone? Should I call your mom?”

You pulled him back down, “No! Don’t- just- let’s watch her again.”

Another word slipped from her lips, this time it was “da-da” on a constant loop.

Kihyun looked to you, “She said dada?”

You nodded in excitement, “I taught her!”

Kihyun looked to you, “I taught her mama… why’d you teach her dada?”

You bit your lip, “I… I wanted her to call you instead of me at night because I want to sleep…”

Kihyun stood up from the couch, “I WAS DOING THE SAME THING, WHAT THE ACTUAL-”

Hyungwon:

Hyungwon held your baby to his chest one night, playing with him and patting his back while he stayed fussy

He gave up bouncing him up and down once his arms got tired, telling you that it was too much work for one night and by the time he finished being a father, he expected to be as big as Wonho

“Honey, that’s impossible.” You laughed, grabbing the baby from him

“So is Wonho, but here we are.” He brushed back his hair and you couldn’t help but snort at his response.

Your baby fiddled with your hair and Hyungwon watched as the little one grabbed your shirt, attempting to say something but closing his mouth before saying anything, continuing to mumble random sounds

Hyungwon had his eyes wide, “Babe… is- is this how people feel when they expect me to say something but I don’t during fan signing?”

You burst into hysterical laughter, “HYUNGWON? What?”

He sat back, staring his baby in the eyes, “Say something, little one. I dare you.”

Your baby looked at him, touching a hand to his nose before stuttering, “Da-da.”

Hyungwon threw his hands up, “AIGOOOO. I promise I’ll never not say what’s on my mind anymore goodness the anxiety killed me.”

Jooheon:

Jooheon always had the baby with him, barely letting you get more than five minutes alone with your beautiful baby girl, but you didn’t mind because it was the cutest thing to see him interact with her.

He always brought her to the studio with him, waltzing her in with oversized earphones and making her stick her tongue out to the fellow MX members who only melted over her deep dimples and bright smile.

Every time he’d write music or raps, he’d sit with your daughter on the dining table, constantly running things by her as she babbled away at nonsense. Eventually, she’d cry when he made too much serious faces, which led him to doing his ‘Circle, Square, Star in my heart’ routine that even you couldn’t resist.

One day, you went to the studio with them, meeting the rest of MX while watching your baby since Jooheon was in the booth.

He stepped out and she lifted her arms to him, “Da-da!” She screeched, causing you to look up at Jooheon whose jaw was already gaping, you yourself barely being able to contain your excitement.

All the members were screaming as well, everyone freaking out and pinching your daughter's cheeks, asking her to say something else, but she became overwhelmed and started to cry.

Jooheon picked her up, putting her on his hip and walking into the booth, clicking on the monitor to speak, “Everyone, please welcome the eighth member of Monsta X, my beautiful baby girl, who’s definitely better than you, Kihyun. Now, let’s get to work people as she is kind of heavy and I think she has a soiled diaper.”

I.M:

I.M became nervous every time he picked up the baby, but you reassured him, “Honey, he can walk a bit, just hold on to his hand.”

He’d wince once the baby would latch onto his shirt, pulling at his suit jacket as well, “Y/N, oh my god, babe, no I can’t.” You left the room, leaving him to fend for himself, but after about five minutes, you already heard loud beats thumping from his recording room.

You pushed the door open, seeing your baby playing with blocks on the floor, wearing large earphones as IM worked on a beat. He turned around, “Babe, I’m gonna drop a mixtape soon, and I need to have our baby on it.”

You raised an eyebrow, “Honey, he doesn’t even speak yet.”

IM lifted a finger, “Wait just a minute, mama.” He picked up his baby by the hands, bringing him to stand while taking a few shaky steps and gripping IM’s fingers. Your baby started looking at you and saying “Mama!”

You gasped, placing your hands over your mouth before laughing, “He spoke already?!”

IM nodded his head, “And of course, I recorded it the second time and started to make the beat. Our son’s a natural, Y/N.”

Your eyebrow twitched, “Changkyun… You mean to tell me... YOU DIDNT CALL ME WHEN HE SAID HIS FIRST WORDS?”

IM’s scrunched his nose, sheepishly smiling before placing the baby on his lap and swiveling his chair around, pressing the spacebar on his monitor to have the loud bass begin to play.

“CHANGKYUN!”

#monsta x #monsta x reacts #monsta x jooheon #monsta x shownu #monsta x kihyun #monsta x minhyuk #monsta x hyungwon #monsta x IM #monsta x wonho #monsta x scenario #monsta x imagines #kpop imagines #all of them would be literally the cutest fathers ever im hurtinnggg #submission

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misssophie23 · 6 years ago

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Didn’t upload Chapter 5 & 6, please read them here.

Bellamy's POV ... I decided to cut this chapter in two because it's freaking long ... although I am sure that no one really cares for this fiction any more, I had a feeling of updating it and hopefully find new motivation to go back to Chapter 13 but I'm really far away from this show right now because s5 sucked so hard, big times and I'm not really excited for s6. But still, I do love Bellarke and love reading other people fanfictions :-)

Can I be happy living with your ghost?

I’ll be at your door tonight if you need help

“Oh come on! This is impossible . You can’t win every stupid card game.”

Miller threw his cards onto the table in the staff room of the fire department. Bellamy grinned mischievously and collected the money.

“It seems like I can,” joked Bellamy back and looked at his friend. He loved playing card games with Miller. He almost always won. Even in games Bellamy just learned he was better than Miller. Bellamy didn’t know why, he wasn’t cheating or anything but it seemed like he always was the lucky one. And it never failed to light up Bellamy’s mood. Especially when he had a bad day at home. Just like today.

Gina and him had … a little discussion about his visiting habit, seeing Clarke before or after work every day. He might had or had not been late to an appointment with his wife because of his best friend. Actually it had been just twice. The first time was three weeks ago when Gina and him wanted to meet at the movies. He had totally forgotten about their date and rushed through the city, arriving twenty minutes too late. The second time he had almost bailed on Gina was last week.

Clarke had asked him about stopping by and putting some of Lexa’s stuff away. She wanted to sleep in her bedroom again but she wasn’t strong enough to make this step alone. So he helped her with the boxes and let her cry into his chest, not wanting to rush her when he realized he had to be at home in ten minutes because his parents-in-law would stop by for dinner. He also may or may not have been mentally absent while watching a documentary about Ancient Greek because Clarke was texting him. And yeah, that was what Gina got angry about.

It wasn’t like Bellamy couldn’t understand. He got his wife. He totally did, but his best friend needed him and he wouldn’t bail on her. No way! Not after what she had been through. They would go through this together! So yeah, maybe in these days Clarke was more important to him than lazy tv nights or dinner with his in-laws. Also, it was only temporary, right? The worrying about Clarke would lessen when more time passed by.

Nathan grumbled something that sounded like “Oh shut the fuck up”, grabbed the cards and complained, “You should be in Las Vegas instead of sitting here with me, getting all the money out of me.”

Bellamy barked out a laughter, “But this is more fun.” He winked and waited for the new cards, while his eyes darted to the clock on the wall. It was half past eight in the evening. Their shift was almost over. Bellamy frowned when he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket.

When he saw the caller ID his heart skipped a beat - it was Clarke.

With an odd feeling in his guts, because of the time Clarke was calling, Bellamy straightened up, his face concerned and glanced at Miller who frowned at him, stiffening the second Bellamy picked up,

“Clarke?”

Bellamy’s heart beat loudly in its cage, while he held eye contact with Miller whose jaw clenched, as much on the edge as Bellamy.

On the other end of the line Clarke didn’t answer. She just kept crying, sobbing. Bellamy felt so sick listening to her deep shaky breaths. His voice was worried and he started to push the chair back, ready to go the second she said so. “Clarke, are you alright?”

Shaky breaths. Crying. Then, “I-I am, I am at the hospital.”

Bellamy’s heart dropped dead to his stomach.

Not again , he thought and swallowed hard, exchanging a serious look with Miller, whose seat was also pushed back.

Since the accident everyone was on edge when it came to Clarke. Everyone was worried about her and her saying that she was at the hospital didn’t help minimize these worries.

“I, I tried to work but I, I can’t go inside. I just -”

Clarke sobbed, but Bellamy felt relieved because nothing bad had happened. Not really. Not this time.

He let out a silent breath, Miller’s shoulders relaxing a little, even though he didn’t know what happened. Nathan still had the frown on his face, eyeing Bellamy closely, not wanting to miss any little news.

“Okay.” Bellamy’s voice was rough, he felt the lump in his throat which he hadn’t noticed being there in the first place when Clarke had called him. He coughed. “It’s okay Clarke. I -”

“I couldn’t drive, so I took a cab.” Explained Clarke further and he literally heard the tears streaming down her face. She was shivering into the speaker. “C-can you pick me up? Please? I don’t - I wanna go home.”

His heart ached at the sound of her voice. The way she asked, helpless and lost. Insecure if he would do what she was asking for, which hurt the most because - of course he would pick her up. He would do anything for her. And Clarke knew that … usually she did. And the others definitely knew. Which lead to the problems with Gina, but as mentioned - Bellamy didn’t care. Clarke needed him and he wouldn’t leave her alone. So without any second thoughts he told her,

“Stay there. I’m on my way.”

“O-okay. Thank you.” Clarke quivered and sobbed before hanging up.

Bellamy breathed out loudly and the second the phone left his ear, Miller asked what happened.

“Clarke tried to go back to work.” Bellamy rubbed his forehead and pushed his phone back into his pocket. “She can’t go inside and she needs -”

Bellamy stopped and looking guilty at his friend, who nodded shortly before rolling his eyes and sighing dramatically because Bellamy didn’t move and he knew what Bellamy was about to say..

“Go!” Miller told him loudly. “Our shift is almost over anyway. I’ll cover the rest up for you.”

Immediately Bellamy jumped out of his seat. “Thanks man. I owe you.”

“Damn right you do. Beer. At Grounder’s. This Saturday!” Yelled Nathan as Bellamy was half through the door, rushing towards his car. All he could think about was his best friend crying.

Bellamy found Clarke a few minutes later on a bench near the hospital entrance. Her arms wrapped around herself because it was freaking cold, so Bellamy’s steps fastened when he saw her shivering.

And despite him seeing the tried tears on her cheeks and the puffed eyes, Bellamy couldn’t help himself but feeling a little angry because Clarke waited here in the cold instead of going inside. So the words stumbled out of his mouth before he could stop them.

“Have you lost your damn mind?”

The blonde flinched and looked at his direction.

“Sitting here in the cold with this stupid jacket? It’s winter Clarke.” While approaching her Bellamy took off his thick fire jacket. Clarke jumped off the bench, eyes wide.

“You are on duty, Bellamy!”

“I know princess.” He growled and held out the jacket but Clarke started to deny.

“Why didn't you tell me? I don’t want you to get trouble because -”

“It’s okay Clarke. It’s almost over anyway.”

“No, it’s not. You can’t just leave work because I called.”

“Obviously I can.” Bellamy cut her off. “And you better get into the jacket now before I put it on you.”

“Bellamy -”

“Gosh Clarke just do as I said, okay? You know that I’ll always come for you. You asked me to help. So that’s what I am doing. So get into the jacket before you catch a cold. Please .”

“I’m fine. You need it -”

Bellamy held up his finger to stop her from talking.

“If you say I need the jacket more than you do then I’ll kick your sweet freaking ass!” He had a serious expression on his face because he was serious! Why couldn’t Clarke do as she was told for once? He would survive the three minutes in his shirt, but she had been sitting in this ‘jacket’ far too long. He didn’t want her to get ill.

“Just get in this jacket or I’ll mother hen the fuck out of you when you are ill! Including watching every historic documentary on Netflix I can find,” threatened Bellamy and his gaze got darker, while his lips curled into a slight smile when Clarke grabbed the jacket immediately.

“God forbid. No.” Said Clarke and wrapped herself into the jacket which was way too big for her. Bellamy smiled satisfied and ignored the little warm sting in the pit of his stomach at this sight.

“Good,” said Bellamy and put his arms over Clarke’s shoulder, kissing her temple,, “then let’s get you home.”

Without another word Clarke walked with him towards his truck. She tried to explain to him what exactly had happened but the tears rolling down her face made her stop. It was just like a few weeks ago when he had picked her up after the accident. Bellamy’s stomach dropped, his jaw clenched and his hand automatically grabbed for Clarke’s. And this time she let him. She didn’t pull away, so he wrapped his hand around her small fingers, squeezing them. Both of them surrounded by silence.

“It was the car.”

“The car?”

Clarke nodded, staring at her third drink she had poured herself while Bellamy was on his second. They both sat on the couch and the tears had tried on Clarke’s face once again.

“Yeah, down in the garage.” She swallowed, grabbing for the glass.

“My car is still standing there like nothing had happened. My car is still here and her’s … she’s gone.” Her voice was rough, thick with new tears.

“And she is not coming back...no matter what I do. No matter how hard I wish for it.” Tears rolled down her cheeks. She gulped down her drink and wiped over her face furiously. But it didn’t make the tears stop strolling down. It made it even worse.

“I just want her back Bellamy.”

Bellamy’s heart broke with every second he saw Clarke suffer. He wished that he could take the pain away. He would do anything for his friend. He wished, he wished he could bring Lexa back. If he could he would, even though she wanted to move away with Clarke. He would rather live a life with Clarke living on the other side of the country but being happy than living with him in Arkadia, being broken and lost.

“I know,” mumbled Bellamy and pulled Clarke into another hug. He held her close, hoping to give her at least some sort of safety, of comfort. “I know.”

It was almost an hour later when he noticed Gina’s missed calls. And suddenly he remembered that he should have been home over an hour ago. She probably worried about him. A hot wave of shame rushed through Bellamy when he pushed the recall button.

Clarke just came back out of the bathroom when he sent the message that he was with Clarke because of her breakdown.

“Everything okay?” Asked Clarke hesitantly, frowning at his tired expression because he felt tired. He knew that Gina would have a problem with him being with his teenage love because it was always a problem, somehow.

Bellamy took a deep breath, a hand washing over his face before putting the phone away.

“I just forgot to text Gina that I’m with you. She tried to call a couple of times but I didn’t answer because I silenced it and - she was just worried that something happened. But I told her that I’m fine and with you.”

“Oh …” Clarke bit her bottom lip, clearly thinking about something. “Well, I’m fine. You can go back home. I kept you long enough.”

Bellamy studied her, shaking his head. “No, no you haven't. And you are out of your mind if you think I’d leave you alone right now. I texted Gina. She knows. It’s okay.”

“But -”

This got Bellamy out his seat. Within two steps he was in front of Clarke and took her small hands into his.

“No but. It’s okay. I, I don’t want to leave you right now.” His thumbs caressed over her soft skin and his heart jumped a little in pride when her mouth curled into a slight smile.

“I’m not going to kill myself Bellamy. I can look out for myself. I promise.”

He snorted and Clarke punched him in his chest with her left hand, offended. “Hey, I’m a big girl. I don’t need saving from anyone else but myself. I’m a modern princess.”

“I know you are.” Grinned Bellamy and without thinking about it he gently pulled a strand of hair behind her ear. His fingertips stroking Clarke’s face and ghosting over her cheek for a second too long. Something changed. Something in the air. His lungs stopped working while his heart beat too quickly.

It was just then that her hand in his felt different, sending electric waves through his arm, through his body. Her eyes weren’t sad any longer. Something else washed through them. Something like … like hope? Bellamy hardly tightened his grip around Clarke’s hand. He felt how her eyes made funny things to him and then his own eyes fell down to her lips. Red parted lips, rosy cheeks, wide blown blue eyes. His hand which was ghosting over Clarke’s cheek, slowly touched her. He felt the skin underneath his hand, her hair on his fingertips. She was so beautiful. So, so beautiful. She probably always would be. At least for him.

Her lips started to curl into a soft smile, but only to turn into a sad one a few seconds later. Tears burned in her eyes and then she pulled her hand out of his and Bellamy had to muster all his strength not to grab after it, to pull her back because it had felt so good. He saw her swallow and he did the same, taking a step back and letting go of her face.

Maybe she was right. Maybe it was better for him to leave. They both had a few drinks … and somehow Bellamy didn’t trust himself being around Clarke right now. Maybe because of what Gina accused him of? Because of their fights and heavy talks? Which were bad excuses, Bellamy knew, but … he didn’t know, something had just been there. Something he thought had been gone forever!

Bellamy woke up on Clarke’s couch with a little headache and even more backache. It was early in the morning. Clarke and him had stayed awake pretty long. They had watched two movies on Netflix and Clarke felt asleep. He had brought her into the bedroom, throwing the blanket over her small form and cleaned the living room before intending to leave but a loud scream held him back. Clarke had a nightmare and after calming her down he had sat next to her until she fell asleep again. It was half past three in the morning then and Bellamy laid down on the couch. He wasn’t allowed to drive anyway, so he decided it would be better to sleep a little before going home.

He checked on Clarke carefully, who was still sleeping, before he wrote a short note and left the apartment.

On his way home, Bellamy was asking himself if it would have been better not to tell Gina the truth. If it would have been better if he had lied, telling her he had to do a double shift, instead of that he was spending the night with Clarke because she had a breakdown.

Usually Gina would understand, but their fights often were about his best friend lately, so maybe it would have been better if he had lied. Of course, Gina and him weren‘t fighting all day but he didn‘t fail to notice her going tense when Clarke‘s name was dropped or that she was holding back whatever she wanted to say.

He never had the feeling that his wife had a real problem with Clarke. Actually, they both became friends too but Gina and Bellamy often were against each other lately. It was annoying and Bellamy wanted to fix this but he wouldn‘t let down his best friend to make it better. Not a chance.

He could never do that! And yeah, he still was checking in on Clarke every day to make sure she was okay and if he couldn‘t stop by himself, which almost never happened, he ensured that one of the others looked after her. And maybe, just a little, he was asking everyone who had been with Clarke how she was doing. Despite the fact that he was texting with her anyway. Okay, he definitely did these things!

So yeah, he probably focused too much on Clarke right now but he couldn‘t help himself to feel so protective of her. She was his best friend and had been through a lot of shit. He just wanted her to know that she wasn‘t alone. That he was always there for her. And didn‘t Gina herself tell him, that Clarke needed him? The accident only had been a month ago. Clarke was still suffering, a lot and way too much if you asked Bellamy. And like hell he would just sit there not doing anything about it!

Nevertheless, the rational part of his brain knew that he was way too overprotective. This part could understand Gina completely and told the rest of him to be a little less worried about Clarke and more about his wife and their relationship. That he should spend more time with Gina, just like he should have last night. He remembered her missed calls and then not answering her phone when he called back. She didn’t answer his text either. And she read them, the two blue ticks told him that. What a blessing and a curse this modern technology was.

He had texted her around 9.30 pm and she had read it almost immediately. He still hadn’t got any response.

Bellamy felt bad. But not because he had stayed with Clarke even after she got better and ensured him he could go back home, which also was a reason but not the main one, but he felt bad because he didn’t feel as guilty as he should be.

Still, the uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach got bigger as he looked at his phone, noticing Gina being online while he was waiting at the light to go to green. He bit his bottom lip while his eyes were fixed on his wife’s name and the three little dots which appeared and told him, that she was writing something. Suddenly his heartbeat sped up and it was so loud that it was echoing in his ears. Bellamy swallowed and noticed his sweaty palms when the dots disappeared and – nothing happened. No text, no emoji, nothing!

Bellamy waited a little longer but no letters appeared on his screen. He swallowed thickly, his heart dropped to his stomach and a loud, almost desperate sigh escaped his lips, “Fuck.”

He closed his eyes, fuck he was so screwed, when a honk of the car behind him made him recognize the green color on the light. But instead of going to the right to drive home he moved his car straight forward.

A muffled sound came out of the kitchen’s direction and his heart slipped into his pants once again as he entered the apartment fifteen minutes later. His steps were slow and he tried to prepare himself for the storm that was about to come. Gina was doing the dishes, which she hated and only did when she was really frustrated or angry.

Bellamy came into a short hold, eyeing his wife’s back who definitely heard but was ignoring him at her best. Still, Bellamy coughed a little, mostly to get his voice straight, and greeted the woman.

“Hey babe.”

Gina didn’t turn around, but retorted with a short “Hello”, never stopping washing the dishes. The guilt in Bellamy’s stomach got heavier at this. His chest clenched. Slowly and hesitantly Bellamy walked further into the kitchen, approaching the brunette.

“I, uhm,” started Bellamy and stopped an arm's length behind Gina, “I brought a little breakfast.”

Even though she was standing with her back towards him, Bellamy raised the left hand with the bag of her favorite muffins and his bagels. Gina didn’t react.

“I thought we could breakfast together before you have to work?” Explained Bellamy further, his heart beating nervously up and down. His eyes raked over Gina’s back, who didn’t make any intention to turn around. Bellamy waited and sighed frustrated when there was no reaction, the bag from the bakery and the flowers (he had bought her a bouquet of gerbera, Gina’s favorites) still in his hands.

“Look Gina, I am sorry, okay? I know I should have called you immediately and told you where I was but I totally forgot about it when Clarke broke down.”

Gina suddenly stopped doing the dishes and put her hands onto the sink’s edge. She sighed quietly. “I’m sorry.”

“What?”

Bellamy had thought about a lot of things Gina would say to him right now but ‘I’m sorry’ wasn’t one of them. The surprised sound of his voice gave away how taken aback he was and that he hadn’t reckoned with it, so Gina repeated her words in a long and loud sigh.

“I said, I am sorry.”

She turned around, crossing her arms in front of her chest to shield herself. Her eyes were small and a little puffed and Bellamy felt like shit because he knew how little Gina probably had slept last night. He saw it. Gina’s eyes dropped shortly to his hands before looking right back at him.

“I, I know that Clarke is going through a rough time and you want to help her because she is your best friend ...”

but , thought Bellamy but didn’t say a word. He kept his mouth shut and listened to his wife’s explanation. He was still processing what was happening because seriously, he thought she was mad at him! He had been so sure that Gina would yell at him and not be like … like this. So quiet and some kind of sad, conflicted. And suddenly Bellamy felt even worse.

“… but I can’t … I know that it’s stupid and that I shouldn’t feel this way but I can’t help myself and feel absolutely and devastatingly jealous of her. Sometimes.” She added and a tortured expression laid down on her face and the guilt Bellamy should be feeling was shining in her eyes.

Bellamy swallowed thickly, not able to open his mouth. His heart clenched in his chest, while his eyes were glued to Gina’s. He knew that he had to say something, but his mind just stopped working.

When he didn’t say anything Gina started shifting uncomfortablely from one foot to another, breaking and reconnecting their gazes. The silence had surrounded them for a long moment before Gina broke it by pointing at the flowers in Bellamy’s hand.

“You brought flowers.”

This got him out of his stupor, reminding him that he was still holding the bouquet.

“Oh, oh yeah.” He raised his arm and holding the flowers towards Gina, feeling a blush rushing up his cheeks.

“They are for you. As amends.”

All of a sudden he felt extremely nervous, his gaze shifted insecure from the flowers towards Gina who eyed him intensively before tears filled her eyes and she apologized all over again, walking towards him and throwing her arms around his neck, into a close embrace.

“I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry Bellamy.” Gina sobbed into his neck and Bellamy dropped everything to put his arms around her. He squeezed her as close as possible, breathing in her sweet, familiar perfume and kissing her temple.

“You don’t have to apologize, okay? It should be me. I love you Gina and I am sorry for making you worry yesterday.”

“I, I love you too. And I know that Clarke needs you more than I do but I ...”

She didn’t finish and bit her bottom lip, so Bellamy took her face into his hands and letting his thumbs carefully move over her cheeks. He locked his brown eyes with hers.

“Maybe she does, but I need you and I am so tired of us fighting and … please forgive me for being such a bad husband lately.”

“You aren’t a bad husband Bell, you brought me flowers.” Gina giggled after a few seconds, which made Bellamy’s heart jump in joy. He smiled, “I did, yeah.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” Whispered Bellamy and placed a sweet and unchaste kiss on her lips.

#Bellarke #Can I be Happy Living With Your Ghost #bellamy blake #clarke griffin #the 100 #bellarke fanfic

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tags-ohara · 2 years ago

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Hi. Hope you're having a good day or afternoon or evening and staying safe. I'd just wanted to talk to you about Selena Gomez documentary My Mind & Me. I just watched it and . . . oh my gosh I'm crying!! 😥😥😥😥. This woman who we grew up with her music and watching her on Disney Channel and her movies has been through so much. Her feelings and all that!! Wow!! And when her Who Says song began playing, I was immediately brought back to when I was younger and I listened to her music, watch her in Wizards of Waverly Place, Another Cinderella story, and Princess Protection Program. And even her new song My mind and me straight away brings me to tears!! 😥😥😥. But I'm very happy Selena is okay now and she was able to achieve her goal of what she wanted to do. And I wish her all the best. Thank you. 💕💕💕♥️♥️♥️🥰🥰🥰

hi, i hope you're having a good day too! as a long time fan, it really was hard to see how much she was struggling. the documentary made me cry in the first 6 minutes. im so so happy shes doing much better now too <33

#ask

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sexydeathparty · 3 years ago

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Nikki Grahame Fans Left Heartbroken By Documentary On Late Big Brother Star

Nikki Grahame after leaving the Big Brother house in 2006

Viewers of Channel 4′s Nikki Grahame documentary were left heartbroken as it told the story of the Big Brother housemate’s eating disorder that sadly claimed her life last year.

The reality TV star was the subject of the one-off programme on Thursday night to mark the one-year anniversary of her death.

Nikki had battled the eating disorder over the course of 30 years before she died at the age of 38 last April.

The documentary saw Nikki’s mother and those close to her detailing her experience with anorexia and sharing their memories of the much-loved star, as the show also charted her rise to fame on the 2006 series of Big Brother.

Nikki’s story moved many viewers to tears and prompted an outpouring of love for her on social media...

I cried my eyes out earlier, watching the Nikki Grahame Documentary.. The first tears came when she spoke about her time in hospital then when her Mum spoke. Spreading awareness #mentalhealth#eatingdisorder

— Shauna (@shaunakaylewin) April 8, 2022

Who is she Nikki Grahame documentary is breaking my heart. No one like her 💔

— Lara🇺🇦🇺🇦🙏 (@lara_yasminxx) April 8, 2022

Watched #nikkigrahame last night, how sad. I really felt for her mum. What an incredibly sad story

— Jessica (@JessyLawro) April 8, 2022

Just seen a bit of the #nikkigrahame program. One of few Big Brother series I watched. She drew me in, vulnerable, funny and unique. She was a shining light in an often dark world. Eating disorders are such a dreadful thing to have to deal with. Rest gently Nikki. 💜. x

— J S Wyvern. Childrens/Adult Fantasy Author 📚 (@LibbleF) April 8, 2022

#NikkiGrahame what a heart breaking programme. Poor kid was so vulnerable. Horrible condition anorexia is. 🙄

— warwick monk (@athole52) April 8, 2022

Totally heartbreaking to watch #nikkigrahame Very sad and hard to watch but more must be done to raise awareness of eating disorders such as #anorexia RIP Nikki

— Kevin (@_KevinWasHere_) April 8, 2022

#nikkigrahame who is she heartbroken watching this 😢 such a beautiful soul we will never forget you sweetheart 💖 pic.twitter.com/rjIA1C0XxI

— Alexandra (@Alexand48075077) April 8, 2022

Just finished watching the documentary and my god the tears didn't stop. Absolutely heartbreaking. My thoughts go out to her friends and family. #nikkigrahame

— Georgina Kay Jenkins (@ginakayx) April 7, 2022

So terribly sad. Bless Nikki. Rest in peace #whosisshe#mentalhealth#nikkigrahame

— Bryony (@BryonyReann) April 7, 2022

Made me cry seeing how much Nikki just wanted to be accepted, she truly was a treasure. Her smile could light a whole room 💕 #NikkiGrahame#whoisshe

— Gem 🌸 (@gemilouisexo) April 7, 2022

Just watched the #nikkigrahame documentary and I am sobbing, imagine fighting that constant battle with your brain and body every day 💔 she truly was a beautiful soul. #nikkigrahame#bigbrother

— rosie ❤️‍🔥 (@Rozzle6) April 7, 2022

Gosh that documentary #whoisshe about #nikkigrahame's plight with #anorexia was powerful, heartbreaking & beautifully made. She was a local girl too. Saw her a few times. A must watch if you haven't already. #ripnikkigrahame

— Joanna Bunt 💙 (@therealjubz) April 7, 2022

During the documentary, Nikki’s mum Susan heartbreakingly revealed she sleeps with a soft toy her daughter was cuddling when she died to be reminded of the star.

“I cuddle him every night now because it brings me a little closer to Nikki,” she said, adding that she hangs the dress Nikki wore when she won a National Television Award in 2007 on the cupboard door.

“I go to sleep with one last look at it and when I wake up, there it is. It is so special to me,” she said.

Nikki won the Most Popular TV Contender award at the NTAs in 2007

Susan also said becoming a Big Brother housemate was Nikki’s “dream” and said the show had helped her cope with her eating disorder.

Nikki won over viewers with her classic Diary Room one-liners and temper tantrums, including her infamous “who is she?” rant.

After re-entering the house having previously been voted out, Nikki eventually landed in fifth place on the seventh series of the show.

She later finished runner-up on Ultimate Big Brother in 2010, before making appearances in three further series, as well as a stint on the Canadian version in 2016.

Prior to the documentary airing, eating disorder charity Beat issued a trigger warning to viewers, explaining that while it had addressed Nikki’s illness “in a respectful and non-glamourising way”, it could be “distressing” for some viewers.

A spokesperson told Metro: “We know that Nikki was a beloved member of the community, however we would advise that anybody currently unwell with an eating disorder does not watch the documentary.

“Whilst the piece talks about eating disorders in a respectful and non-glamourising way, there are some details that would be distressing for those affected by eating disorders, such as specific BMIs and low weight photos.”

Help and support:

Beat, Adult Helpline: 0808 801 0677 and Youthline: 0808 801 0711 or email [email protected] (adults) [email protected] (youth support) Samaritans, open 24 hours a day, on 116 123 Mind, open Monday to Friday, 9am-6pm on 0300 123 3393

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sapphicscholar · 7 years ago

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hi so I didn't know who to ask but in my psych class we're learning about adolescent psychology, & there was this unit on developing interest in relationships. It went way into detail on how the brain changes during that time, which was interesting, but ofc my gay ass couldn't relate. at the end all it said was 'it's different for homosexuals.' I guess I'm wondering if you know of any way to learn about psychology relating to LGBT people? srsly im thirsty for anything in academia I can relate to

(same psych anon) that was a pretty specific question so I guess like do you have any info or know of any links/ websites/places to learn about lgbt history and lives and stuff like that in an academic way? bc I love school & learning but I’ve always wanted to learn more about myself and people like me, but they never teach that in schools.

Oh my gosh SO MANY THINGS! Okay, so, the psych stuff is pretty outside of my knowledge but I asked my gf (she does the science in this relationship while my gay ass just reads a whole lot of books), and she recommends Helen Fisher and looking at the researchers at the Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality or the Kinsey Institute, as well as The Sage Encyclopedia of LGBTQ Studies (it’s an online resource a lot of universities subscribe to). But I’d also say that as far as thinking about developmental narratives, LGBTQ memoirs are a great place to start, especially since so many of them go through their own experiences of having to confront this heteronormative, cis-centric narrative that just doesn’t fit them and their lives.

So some good queer history authors are: John D’Emilio (comprehensive, if a bit male-centric), Lillian Faderman (writing all about lesbian history, including more recent history; very well-respected; she’s got some issues in her scholarship that by no means discount it as a whole, but I’m happy to talk more about if you want), Michael Bronski (his Queer History of the United States is really accessible), George Chauncey (it’s just of NYC, but still fun), Estelle B. Freedman, Foucault (though it’s not quite “history,” it’s a kind of history meets theory of regimes of power and how sexuality got tied up in that), Martha Vicinus (I adore her), Valerie Traub (goes all the way back to the early modern period), and so many others who really focus more on niche history, so I won’t list them here. There are some web resources, but I know a lot of them are databases that are subscription-based. I’ll see what I can’t dig up in the next couple of days as far as free websites. I know they exist; it’s just a matter of having the time to look…

Okay, you didn’t specifically say you were interested in literature but bc I taught literature and think it’s a great way to learn about the history of a group, I’m gonna list some anyway and you can feel free to disregard!

Patricia Highsmith, The Price of Salt (or Carol, depends on the year it was printed) – you can also check out the movie! I find the two to be complementary (the book gives you Therese’s POV almost exclusively, whereas the movie shows much more of Carol’s story)

Alison Bechdel, Fun Home is her graphic novel/memoir that’s really excellent, but the comic strip that sort of launched her as a public persona (at least within the lesbian community) was Dykes to Watch Out For, quite a bit of which is available for free online

Henry James, The Bostonians – one of the first recognizable depictions of a queer female character in literature (not really…I’d trouble that as a professor, but that’s how it gets taught in general, and it was one of the first books where even contemporary reviewers were quick to note that there was something “wrong” or “morbid,” which was 19th C. code for what would come to be understood as lesbian sexuality, about Olive Chancellor) – free online, though it’s James at his most….Jamesian, which means it’s not that accessible

The poetry of Emily Dickinson! It’s all free online. There’s a ton of it, though much of it isn’t obviously queer

James Baldwin, Giovanni’s Room – gets into bisexual identity in a way a lot of works don’t do; on the sadder side…fair warning

Virginia Woolf! Especially Orlando or Mrs. Dalloway – the former has been called “the longest and most charming love-letter in literature” (to Woolf’s longtime friend and lover, Vita Sackville-West) and deals with the fluidity of gender and time; the latter has quite a few flashbacks to the brief childhood romance of the protagonist and her friend. Both of them are great, but Woolf, as a modernist, can have a writing style that’s difficult to get into at first (for instance, time really isn’t stable or linear, which is something I adore about her, but definitely takes some getting used to). They’re both available free online through Project Gutenberg

Radclyffe Hall, The Well of Loneliness – it’s a classic, in the sense that it’s one of those books people sort of expect you to have read if you do lesbian literature. It’s certainly an interesting story and told well, but it’s not even close to a happy ending and is rather conciliatory to prevailing norms (though even still it was taken to the courts under the obscenity laws) - free online, though!

Sarah Waters – a contemporary novelist who writes almost all historical fiction about queer women! Some of her stories are better known (e.g. Tipping the Velvet), but they’re pretty much all great. Varying degrees of angst, but definitely an accessible read

Maggie Nelson, The Argonauts – sort of experimental in form (it’s fiction with footnotes!); it deals with a lesbian woman coming to terms with her partner’s transition and her own identity during the process

E.M. Forster, Maurice – even though it was first drafted in the 1910s, Forster edited it throughout his life, and, given the subject matter, which was also autobiographical, and the prevailing attitudes at the time, the book was only published posthumously in the 70s

Colette’s Claudine series – it’s long (multi-volume) but sort of a classic – they’re all old enough to be free online, though the English translation is harder to come by

Eileen Myles – lesbian poet and novelist – I’d recommend Inferno but some of her poetry is free online

Rita Mae Brown – Rubyfruit Jungle and Oranges Are not the Only Fruit are both quite good, though, especially the latter deals with religiously-motivated homophobia, so I know at least my girlfriend, who dealt with a lot of that from her family, opted not to read it for her own mental health.

Tony Kushner, Angels in America – this two-part play deals with the AIDS crisis in America – it’s been turned into a TV miniseries, a Broadway play, and a movie, some of which are available online

Really anything by David Sedaris or Augusten Burroughs – both are gay authors who deal a lot with short stories (a ton of memoir/autobiographical stuff) – the former is a bit funnier, but they both have enough sarcasm and dry wit even in dark situations to make them fast reads

Alan Ginsburg’s poetry

Walt Whitman’s poetry (though it can be really fucking racist)

Binyavanga Wainaina, One Day I Will Write About This Place – does deal with issues of sexual abuse as a warning

Anything by Amber Hollibaugh (she writes a lot about class and butch/femme dynamics – quite a bit of her stuff has been scanned and uploaded online)

Michelle Tea – was a slam poet; recovering alcoholic; fantastically funny and talented author and delightful human being if you ever get the chance to meet her or go to one of her readings

Randy Shilts, And the Band Played On – more a work of investigative journalism than anything, the work is a stunning indictment of the indifference of the US government during some of the worst years of the AIDS crisis, but it also provides a good bit of gay history

Terry Galloway Mean Little Deaf Queer – deals with one woman’s experience of losing her hearing and navigating the world and the Deaf and deaf communities as a once-hearing person – she’s sort of acerbic and always funny;

Jeffrey Eugenides, Middlesex – grapples with intersex identity in a way that’s still far too rare in literature

Theodore Winthrop, Cecil Dreem – just rediscovered about two years ago, this is one of the few pretty happy gay novels from the nineteenth century! Free online!

Leslie Feinberg, Stone Butch Blues – pretty clear from the title, but deals with a butch character’s struggles with gender identity (takes T to pass for a while, but then gets alienated from the lesbian community; eventually stops taking T, but still struggles with what that means for her) – Feinberg’s wife made it free online for everyone after Feinberg’s death (the book had a limited print run, which made finding copies both hard and expensive)

Harvey Fierstein, Torch Song Trilogy – trilogy later adapted for film about an effeminate gay man (who also performs as a drag queen) and his life and family

Oscar Wilde – his novels aren’t explicitly gay, but they often dance around it thematically, at least; his heartbreaking letter, De Profundis, which he wrote to his lover while imprisoned for “gross indecency,” is available online

Anything by Dorothy Alison

Audre Lorde, Zami: A New Spelling of My Name - great as a memoir and a cultural history

There’s so many more but this is so my jam I suspect I’ve already rambled too long

If you’re interested in film, here are a few:

Paris Is Burning (a film about drag ball culture in NYC)

Fire – Deepa Mehta (it’s on YouTube in the US)

Boys Don’t Cry – there is a lot of homophobia and transphobia in the film, so it’s definitely one you’ll want to be in the right mindset to watch (I, for one, have only watched it once)

But I’m a Cheerleader – over-the-top mockumentary-esque film that satirizes conversion therapy and the Christian “documentaries” that claimed to showcase their successes (RuPaul is in it as well)

Desert Hearts – one of the earliest films to leave open the possibility of a happy ending for the lesbian couple

Hedwig and the Angry Itch – deals with gender identity and feelings of not belonging (also a fabulous musical)

Philadelphia – about one man’s experience of discrimination while dying of AIDS

There are plenty of lighter films, but I figure these tend to also talk more seriously about some issues as well

I don’t know if anyone but me made it to the end of this post, but there’s also so much fun queer theory out there that I won’t get into here, but I’m always up for giving more recommendations!

#ask me #anon #professor rambles #lgbtq history #lgbtq literature #book recommendations #film recommendations

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kojinnie · 4 years ago

Text

Home

Maybe the way I deeply inhaled your scent made too much noise that it cracked your laughter, "What.. are you doing?" you said, softly trying to pull away my face from your chest so you could catch a sight of me. I struggled and keep latching on to you.

"You.. Smell like home," the mumble that came out of my mouth had only sounded like a hum as my face was buried deep into your t-shirt, "I'm hooome..." I groaned.

With the advance of the documentary about London's Great Fog we were watching, and as it progressed to its high-point, I was certain you didn't catch my saying.

Troubled by the lack of response, other than your mindless, "Uh huh." I crawled up and kissed your cheek, "I said, you smell like home."

My reiteration drove you to quickly adjusting your seat just to have a better look at me, abandoning the clip of Churchill's speech that were now playing. You were grinning and I just couldn't help to steal another kiss on your looming dimples.

You were quick to harness my face to stay put, keeping it close to your face with your two big hands, while the tip of your thumbs circled the baby hairs on my temple, "With me?"

"Yes."

"Are you home with me, or with me you are home?"

"Wait, what? How's that any different?"

"The former suggests your and my whereabouts whilst the latter is, like, um, an expression."

"Hm," I glanced at you, "Which one you'd prefer?"

"The latter."

"Why? What's so enthralling about this... expression?"

I adjusted my body so our faces were aligned. I just loved to toy with you, the way you raised your brows with your grimace like you kept all the secrets to world's mysteries, as you trailed your fingers from my temple down to the side of my face, making a momentary stop at the corner of my lips.

There's something about you. Something about the way your eyes stared at my lips right now. The way your chest heaved, as it pressed on mine. The baritone in your voice...

"Because I--"

Then I realized I might be biting off for something I couldn't possibly chew.

"Wait. Wait up," I interrupted you abruptly. There were days when things, or specifically, you, could be overwhelming for me, and apparently today was that day, "I--I.. Whatever you're gonna say please think through."

"What do you think am I gonna say?" Your brows furrowed and your fingers lazily tapped on my cheek. But still, there was something playful in your tone.

"Well I--"

You knew me. I had all this paranoia about getting too fast, with anything or with anyone. In my last job's performance review my Boss said, 'You have invested a lot of passion in your work, I want you to do the same with your co-worker.' Which made a lot of sense, since I'd tip-toed from not getting too involved in whatever I thought was not in its professional portion. And maybe I was doing the same thing with you. Maybe I needed performance review from you.

I'd like to blame it on the disappointing five-year long relationship I had prior to you. Something that started too fast, that I'd found myself neck-deep already in the quicksand before I had realized the only thing my ex did that was due to his credit was sucking me dry. I did not want that to happen, ever again.

"--I don't know."

A long sigh and everything went quiet as you reached out for the TV remote to turn it off. I pulled my body away from you and now we were both leaning to the bed's headboard, staring at the blank screen of the TV.

"What are we doing?" I could sense that whatever left from your playfulness had gone, the way your voice dropped deeper suggested that you had grown upset, "Why does it always end up like this?"

"I'm sorry. I -- I shouldn't have come." My mind went racing to all the encounters that always led me back to spend the night at your place. Be it after you picking me up from work, after a movie date, or after a visit to the museum's latest exhibition, which always led to us driving to nearby McDonald's, my last-minute change of mind, not wanting to dine-in, me vaguely suggesting to bring the food back to your apartment, "I shouldn't have led us back here. All these times."

I was about to get off of the bed when you reached over to my side and grabbed my hands, delicately, for there was never coercion in your demeanor, something I had always brought to my mind, 'Oh, he is different.'

"I want to talk about," There was a pause in your sentence as you let go of my hand, "us."

I sat myself on the edge of the bed, hesitating for awhile before taking a deep breathe and said, "Okay. I'm ready."

"Don't ever do that again, please."

"I'm sorry. I know I egged you on, I shouldn't have egged you on. Shouldn't even be here on the first place. Should have known the boundaries. I-- gosh, I'm sorry--"

"No, no, no," I was knee-deep in my blabber when you stopped me, you dragged your body across the bed to get closer to me and you took a long sigh, "what I meant was. Don't ever run away from discussing things with me ever again, ok? I, um, really want to make something out of this, ok?"

"Oh. Ok?"

"..with you."

"With me?"

"Yes."

"Ok," I realized I was almost breathy as if I was hanging on my last stroke of breathe, "what does that mean?"

"What do you think?"

"I--"

"Please don't say you don't know."

"--I don't. I really don't. Joon, can we get this over with? Let's go back watching TV--"

He held my hands back in place as I was just to reach out for the remote.

"Listen," His voice was calm but firm. So I listened, as I fought back all the nerves popping inside me. I listened, as once again he brought my face close to him, and kissed my lips gently and slowly. He kept his lips shut, because he wanted me to know what kind of kiss it was, the gentle one, the delicate one... the compassionate one.

He took a deep, groaning breathe as he parted his lips away from me, which left me a sudden crying mess, "We've been going on like this for a year. Shit, when I say that out loud that sounds like a fucking long time to be in a limbo of a relationship. I knew then you needed more time, I gave you time -- you gave me time too. We'd spent a lot of time together, and I'd enjoyed every, bit, of it."

There was something so enchanting about his eyes, ones that reassure you with no words. I just stared at those two kind eyes as he went on, "You don't need me. You never did. You always manage to get everything right on your own. Your job, your family, your friends. You get them all in check."

"Fuck. Baby. I don't know how to say this. But you swallowed 'em whole, you know that? An in order to do that, you, um, you swallowed all their toxins for you to fend on. You think you're an antidote to everyone's problem, but all it does to you -- it eats you up inside. Don't you see that?"

"I'm not here to fix you, you're no a-- a-- the fuck do they call it? An ornament? A utility? That someone can fix. You know what to do, you know what you want and you know who you want to. That’s the one thing about you that I, um, I always, want to have. It’s hard work to be you. You're fucking perfect already and I'm here to be the one to tell you, to stop trying so hard to be perfect when you already are."

You stopped for a while as my sobs were getting apparent. Do you know how it felt like to grow up as a walking disappointment? Having to be obsessed with being number one and winning awards because that was the only way you could be of importance while your parents were busy being occupied by how pretty your sister was or how funny your brother was? And when you got older it had just gotten worse because by then you had been numb from swallowing your hurt since early age. Mix that with past trauma from dating an absolute dick, and all you'd get is an absolute bitter mind. But you understood that, didn't you?

"Babe. Baby? Look at me," You lifted my chin so I could see you the way you wanted me to bare all my vulnerabilities, "I don't fucking care if that moron of a friend you had, said that you were not 'meeting-parents-worthy', I'd be proud to introduce you to each one of my family, you know? From my uncle who sells fishcake, to my fashion designer cousin, to my sister and parents. I'm gonna get them all to know you. I'm gonna introduce you so hard they'd think your part of the family already." You said, as you kissed me on the right cheek.

"I don't fucking care if your ex-boss told you that you only sound smart. Does that piece of shit know that it takes a great mind to sound smart on the first place? He never got to see how you won that million dollar pitching." This time, the kiss fell on my left cheek, as you lower my body back to lay on the bed.

"I don't fucking care if that stupid coffee guy was only attracted with his made-believe delusion of you. That guy? Was a fucking idiot, because he's missing out on.. your fucking oddly misplaced, grotesque, Hitchcockian joke. He never got to see how fucking awesome you were in that Salem witch dress. Holy shit I still think about that image in my head a lot." He laughed, while planting the kiss on my forehead.

"And lastly," you hovered on me so closely, I could even feel the precipitation of your warm breathe on top of my nose, "to your dipshit ex."

You laid out both of my arms and trapped them underneath your grip, you brought your body down closer to me until we were touch-to-touch, as you grazed your lips on my ears, I started to feel a hard coil grew inside my lower stomach. My breathe was starting to turn erratic for I didn't know what was about to happen with your mention of my ex and the sudden intense energy emerging from you.

You situated your eyes right on to me, with your lips so close to mine that in every word you uttered, I can feel the warmth of your breathe and I had nowhere to escape, "Fuck that guy. He thinks you're only pretty when you're naked? Have you seen you when you're passionately doing your job? Or when you’re babbling all these breakthrough ideas you had just after thinking about it 5 minutes in the shower? Or when you cry? When you're mad? When you give your genuine loving?"

I laughed, tear-strung and all, but I laughed. Because it felt so good. And you smiled.

"Thank you," I said finally breaking my silence, "but what do we do now from here?"

There was a smile arising from him, one that I could not tell what it meant as he started kissing the inner part of my trapped arms and trailed it down to my neck. Every word was followed by each kiss, "Just. Tell. Me. You. Want. Me."

That demand hooked on to me. Not because it was something I was frightened to hear, but because when he said it, I realized I needed to stop running.

"But, Joon," I tried to pace my words, while trying to suppress the moans seeping through my lips as he dragged his lips to the sensitive side of my neck, "do you love me?"

He abruptly stopped, and I could feel his grip on my hand tightened almost as if he was offended by my question.

"From the very moment I drove you home for the first time three years ago, until now," he made a pause just to make sure that I was looking straight at him. His eye was softened and so was his grip. Maybe it was his smile that appeared suddenly, how his eyes turned crescent-shaped when he smiled, that drove me to utter the words:

"I've always loved you." "I love you."

It took a split second for me to realize that we had just spoken the words together, with no cue. For two klutzes like us, it was, truly, remarkable.

"I fucking..." his words were cut off as a jolt of energy drove me to push his body away, flip him to the opposite side, as I climbed on top of him, "...love you."

“Then let’s make this official.”

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