#goofy asses i hope they die oh wait

[aliettali]

what a creature

[tthesongofachilless]

THE WINNER TAKES IT ALL

♟️ — relationship: Max Verstappen x fem!teammate!reader

♟️ — face claim: Pinterest

♟️ — WARNING: This smau includes hate, death threats and sexism.

♟️ — a/n: thank you everyone for the support recently! Its been a wild ride making this, so I hope you enjoy it! For requests on my next smau, feel free to put in an ask! Enjoy

maxverstappen1, yourbestfriend and 384,752 other liked..

f1: F1 BREAKING: Y/n Y/l/n signs with Redbull! ✏️

view comments:

user1: WHAT HUH WAIT WHAAA

user2: RUE... WHEN WAS THIS?

user3: IM SHAKING

redbullracing: welcome 🫶🏻

user4: OH HELL NO

user5: checo come back the kids miss you (im the kids)

maxverstappen1: 👋

user6: i thought we were getting a maxiel reunion..

user7: she's a fucking rookie what do redbull expect is gonna happen

user8: the history book on the shelf is always repeating itself 😔😔😔

yourusername: 🫶

user9: shut your goofy ass up go to Williams instead they will LOVE you there

yourbestfriend, landonorris and 23,038 others liked..

yourusername: trying to live my life till the fullest until my trainer forces me to stop 🙈

view comments:

user10: oh don't worry girlie you'll be back to living your life till the fullest in no time

user11: gosh lando in the likes she's already tryna bag every driver

user12: all i wanna know is how does y/n make that many cups of coffee and not finish any of them?

user13: cant wait to see her make a post talking about her leaving F1

user14: y/n is about to become the james charles of f1

yourbestfriend: miss you xxx

yourusername: miss you more!!!

—

liked by redbullracing, maxverstappen1 and 197,296 others..

f1: 👋 Hello Max, Hello Y/n! Who's ready for our opening round of the season?

view comments

user20: gosh she won't even let the photographers get a good picture for the official f1 insta

user21: did they..... arrive together...?

user22: uhm!!! who is this girl!!!! where is checo!!!!???

user23: max run

redbullracing: Hello, f1!

yourusername: ME!!!🙈🙈🙈

user24: shut UP ALREADY

schecoperez and 482,074 liked..

f1: CONTACT! 💥 Max Verstappen is okay, safety car is deployed.

view comments:

user25: im going to murder y/n.

user26: turning the tv off it isn't worth watching anymore

user27: CHECO IN THE LIKES HAHAHA

user28: hey y/n do a mazespin

user29: redbull shaking in their boots

landonorris, redbullracing and 963,285 liked..

f1: Y/N Y/L/N, A FORMULA ONE GRAND PRIX WINNER!

view comments

yourbestfriend: THAT'S MY GIRL

redbullracing: 👊👊👊

user30: ugh

user31: can't wait for her to crash at every other race!

user32: wondering how the haters feel now...

yourusername: I FEEL AMAZING 🥁🥁

user33: kill yourself

yourusername posted a story!

caption: I'm winning

tagged: maxverstappen1

view comments

maxverstappen1: uhm you cheated

yourusername: you literally ate one of your cards

user34: leave that man alone

user35: jump out of the bus

maxverstappen1, taylorswift and 38,284 others liked..

yourusername: Taylor was right! Haters gonna hate hate hate while I'm just gonna shake shake shake!

view comments

user36: she's so annoying

user37: she's a swiftie? Gonna stop listening to Taylor now 🙉

taylornation: glad we could help 💕

user38: are we not going to talk about the second picture

user39: im scared for that mans wellbeing

maxverstappen1: 🏌️ Score!

user40: MAX RUN

—

— 7 Months later..

maxverstappen1, yourbestfriend and 918,024 others liked..

yourusername: wanna die but at least I've got my boo 💐

view comments

yourusername: you deserve so much better baby 💕

maxverstappen1: 👫 twinssss

user44: I'm sorry YOU SAY TWINS IN THAT YOU WANNA DIE OR YOU GOT YOUR BOO

user45: girl has been through it all in the past few months

user46: show them that they're wrong!!

user47: who is the boo?

user48: ugh such a pinterest lifestyle

liked by redbullracing, maxverstappen1 and 486,019 others

f1: Our final race of the season is upon us! Who will take the title? Verstappen or Y/l/n?

view comments

user50: if y/n manages to win the title in her rookie year despite all the hate she's getting I'm going to be so proud

user51: both deserve it so much 🧡

redbullracing: We are happy either way!

user52: DU DU DU DU MAX VERSTAPPEN

user53: y/n prove the haters wrong!

liked by 401,851 others.

F1: RED FLAG 🚩 Mick is okay.

view comments

user54: SHITTTT

user55: Mick baby you need a new seat

user56: doesn't this now make redbull 1-2?

user57: yeah! y/n is leading while Max is second

liked by 1,052,852 others

F1: We go racing again in Abu Dhabi! Y/n is leading with Max in second and Lewis in third.

view comments

user58: YOU GOT THIS Y/N!!!

user59: Lewis could do so something really funny now

user60: MAXIE 2024 CHAMP

user61: last race with Lewis at merc... im not sad... no...

user62: im shaking

maxverstappen1, yourbestfriend and 4,952,012 others liked..

F1: OUR NEWEST WORLD CHAMPION, Y/N Y/L/N!

view comments

user64: fucking bitch

user65: YESSSSSS

user66: UGH

user67: the way max looked at her when he got out of the car 🥹

user68: can't tell if she used him to get the wdc or if they are actually in love

user69: MAX AND Y/N OH MY GODD

user70: 💕

yourbestfriend: AHDHDHHGDDHHD IM GONNA DIE

yourusername, redbullracing and 6,308,157 others liked

maxverstappen1: Y/n, I've loved you since I first met you in our junior years. Your personality matches mine, and I could've never asked for anyone more beautiful than you. Please let us grow old together and look back on these moments and laugh.

Love you, world champion. 💛

view comments

yourusername: 💛 Gosh I love you come back to our room let me kiss you

user71: "let us grow old together" max what if I just died now

redbullracing: So happy for you both 💛

user72: THE THIRD PICTURE?

user73: gonna cry myself to sleep

user74: THEY ARE SO CUTEEEE

user75: UGHFHFHFHD

— fin 💐

— ♟️ a/n : thank you all so much for reading this! This took a while to make, as i was really stuck on how to progress the story further without making it too short. Again, if you have any smau requests, feel free to put them in my asks! Love you all 🦅🦅

[colie-nne]

captured?

pairing: daniel ricciardo x photographer!reader | instagram au

summary: some bantering with the one and only daniel ricciardo.

requested: yes | no

a/n: I was bored and I missed danny ric so here is something I did for a hot minute, sorry if it's a mess. requests are open

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo and 108,237 others

yourusername round 1: more unreleased DR3 pics like you guys requested

(tagged: mclaren, danielricciardo)

view all 492 comments

user The smile he gives y/n is breathtaking.

user more, please!!!🫶🏻

landonorris when will you release mine? i'm waiting

yourusername sorry, Lando. you'll have to wait in line landonorris Hey! wasn't I the one who gave you the idea danielricciardo but I'm her favourite.

danielricciardo

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc and 452,887

danielricciardo round 2: capturing the photographer

view all 192,230 comments

user why is y/n on the floor😭😭😭

user not Daniel joining his girlfriend's photo trends

user i love this wag so much

user same user oh to be this kind of wag user same (2)

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, landonorris and 547,923 others

yourusername round 3: My Boys 🧡

(tagged: mclaren, danielricciardo and landonorris)

view all 318 comments

user my boys😭

user so is lando like their child or something?

user yeah, i think so user idk maybe more like an annoying little sibling landonorris .... user i'm sorry🥲

danielricciardo my love❤️

yourusername why are you dropping things like this out of nowhere 🫣 danielricciardo cause i can user y/n being shy when danny shows love is cute

user i love this thing that they're doing

danielricciardo

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55 and 643,052 others

danielricciardo round 4: capturing the photographer off-guard

view all 344,754 comments

yourusername why the pictures?

danielricciardo you look lovely in it yourusername even whilst i'm hibernating? danielricciardo always, even if you look like a caterpillar and wake up like a bear

user the transition from posting unreleased f1 photos to making the world feel single is huge

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, alex_albon and 163,994

yourusername round 5: payback?? (sorry for not posting mclaren pictures, the man had awakened the beast)

view all 4,238 comments

user this series went from unreleased McLaren pics to dumping their whole ass relationship on instagram.

landonorris put those grippers away, mate

danielricciardo never😍 yourusername the reason why I had to repost this, to be honest

user they're so goofy🤩

danielricciardo

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc and 449,201 others

danielricciardo round 6: will end this on a good note (she's threatening to post ungodly pictures of me so I had to). still love you!!

(tagged: yourusername)

view all 254,892 comments

yourusername still?? kidding i love you too

user y/n reciprocating his love publicly, what a day danielricciardo aww my love yourusername ok, now...

user he's so boyfriend material

user when will i get my own dr3?

landonorris does this mean that daniel has rizz?

danielricciardo yes yourusername no and close your eyes, child alex_albon I will pretend I didn't see anything, mother landonorris I'm already blind so count that in

yourusername

liked by mclaren, landnorris, danielricciardo and 832,019 others

yourusername round 7: ending this chaotic exchange with the pictures i was supposed to post. Hope you love these, just like how much i love taking them.

(tagged: danielricciardo, landonorris, and mclaren)

view all 604,954 comments

user i love the unreleased pictures so much!!!

yourusername thank you!! will post once I've been granted permission again landonorris mate, you don't need to ask. Post them already yourusername do you want me to get fired? user lol

redbullracing Can we get you to take photos of the team?

danielricciardo no mclaren no landonorris no yourusername sorry, but no user y/n is where daniel is, you can never separate them.

user aaaa the headband pictures are to die for!!!

[gimmeurmoneyagh]

𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐌𝐀𝐃𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐀 - 𝟎:𝟎𝟐

❝𝟏𝟔𝟎𝟎 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐠 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭, 𝐄𝐠𝐲𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐚𝐧 𝐫𝐨𝐲𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭❞

- Cleo De Nile

Oh my rah, it was full of normie boys. 

You let your jaw drop open, and silently weeped at the fact there were no ghouls. Crowley noticed and giggled a little and Grimm just rolled over and over on your shoulder.

“Is that all for the new student dorm assignments?“ A red-head (ew a ginger, teehee) started, putting his hand on his hip.

“Listen up new students. Here in Heartslabyul I am the rules. Break them and it’s off with your head.“ He kept a pointed look to the group of Heartslabyul freshman.

A man with lion ears just groaned “Urgh. This stuffy ceremony is finally over.“ (OMG A WERE-LION SHIT. maybe you werent in aschool for normies?)

“We’re going back to the dorm. Savanaclaws, follow me.“ He waved over a group of Savanaclaw freshman to follow him.

A boy with a beauty mark and glasses smiled over to the group of Octavinelle freshman, “To the new students, congratulations on entering this academy. Enjoy your life here to it’s fullest!“

“As the dorm leader of Octavinelle I will suport you to the best of my ability!“ 

A drop-dead gorgeous man (or was it a ghoul?) hummed “By the way where did the Headmaster go? He flew right out in the middle of the ceremony...“

“Abandoning his post...“ a tablet(?, where the hell were you) spoke.

“Maybe he got a tummy ache or something!“ a cheerful looking boy said.

“Not at all!“ Crowely spoke up putting his hands out, “oh... he’s here“ The red-head said.

“I cannot believe you all.“ He sniffed into his hands, as if crying. “We were missing one new student so I went to find them.“

’Maybe I didn’t want to be found?!’

Crowley pushed you in front of him causing all the students to focus their gaze on you. Which caused you to look down, but then you were like wait a minute i’m a de nile! So you stared straight ahead at the dark mirror, wishing to just go home already.

“You were the only one yet to be assigned a dormitory. I shall watch over the raccoon,“ (Grim hissed when Crowley said that) “step in front of the dark mirror.“

You walked up to the mirror, strutting up the steps. Hiding the fact you did not want to be here.

“State thy name“

You were so close to doing what you did to the guard in Hauntlywood, but the mirror creeped you out with it’s black eyes.

“My name is (Name) De Nile, 😼. You might have heard of me!“ You gloat, the mirror frowns and shakes it’s head(? mask?).

“(Name) De Nile... The nature of thy soul is...“

Maybe stop taking long-ahh pauses? 

“I do not know“

“Come again?“ Crowley screeched but covered it up with a cough. “I sense not a spark of magic from this one...“

Duh! Maybe because you weren’t a witch??

You were a mummy. A mummy. You were starting to get seriously annoyed so you huffed and wrapped your arms around your chest.

“The color. The shape. Are all nothing“

Excuse you?! What kinda place were you in if the sacred object (ooooh) can’t even recognize greatness?

“Therefore she is suited for no dormitory.“

Crickets chirped before the room exploded in murmurs. Using that time you briskly walked down the stairs and into the crowd near Crowley.

“Did the mirror say ’she’?“

“Yes you fucking deaf bitch. I hope you die“

“I ate my grandma :)“

“Okay jeffrey dahmer“

“An ebony carriage would never go to meet someone who can’t use magic! Nevertheless a woman!“

“I’m still here“ You sneer “And the fuck does me being a girl have to do with it??“

Crowley ignored you again (you swear you were plotting his downfall) “In a hundred years there has not once been a mistake in the student selection. So why in the world...“

He stroked his non-existant beard. (why are people here so goofy)

“It’s probably your fault“ You offered as a reason, he frowned displeased by you words. (tf he expect you to do praise his ass???)

“Then i’ll take her place!“ A screechy voice shouted, it was Grim!!

“Stay right there, racoon!“

Geim ignored Crowley giving him a taste of his one medicine “Unlike that dumb human, I can use magic! Lemme in the school instead!!“

Did you have to say it again? You were not a normie.

“If ya’ need proof I’ll show you right now!“ Grim smirked (at no one, no one cared).

“Everybody, get down!“ a voice stunned you, and you instictively shoved someone in front of you while getting down. (were you an asshole? maybe, but at least you were’nt scorched)

“NNNAGHH!!!“

The room erupted in bright blue flames covering the ground, causing you to cough from the smoke being emitted.

“WAH! HOTTT!!! MY BUT’S ON FIRE!!!“ someone cried out, it was that boy with red eyes that said crowley had a tummy ache. You mentally giggled at the memory before scolding yourself for thinking about that when the room was on fire.

“At this rate the school will be a sea of fire! Somebody catch that racoon!“

A burst of fire went your way so you pushed someone in front of you. You don’t remember who it was though (savanaclaw student b)

You were going to ignore the red-eyed guy but you noticed his earings. And they shined like real gold, annd you had to get some of that sweet sweet friend money!!!

“Here,“ You took of your robe and repatedly smacked his ass with it (that’s how fires stopped in those normie adds, right?).

He looked up at you with a big smile, “THANKYOUSOMUCHIT’SSOKINDOFYOU-“

You smile at him “No need for the thank yous. you’re welcome“ you giggle cutting him off.

“I have to throw a party for you!“ He grabbed your hands and clasped them together, you felt a tiny piece of guilt for only helping him because of the gold earings. But you’re broke in this new world you need money.

You wave him off as he sing your praises, and honestly it was making your ego swell. But then some fuckface just had to interupt you too.

“Kalim! What are you doing you could’ve gotten hurt!“ some guy hissed a hint of annoyance showing on his face before masking it with a (fake) look of fear. 

“Jamil! You have to mee... Huh? Where is she?“ Kalim thought out loud. 

“Tch! Suck ups!“ the were-lion (you think. you’re not sure where the fuck your were) snorted (weed)

The hottie with purple hair tips just scoffed “Hmm? Aren’t you supposed to be good at hunting? Doesn’t it look like a nice plump snack“ He cooed condescendingly.

“Why me? Do it yourself.“ the were-lion snarled, you get being a were and stuff (from Clawdeen) but growling? that’s crossing the line.

“Mr. Crowley, please leave it to me“ a sickingly-sweet voice called out, it was that guy with a beauty mark. And he was grinned as if eager to show off his magical ability. “I’m suure the others couldn’t stomach harassing the poor creature, so I shall take it upon myself.“

“WTG, Azul. Always trynna rack up those points.“ The tablet spoke up (you’ve seen crazier).

“Are you all even listening!?“ Crowley stomped his feet.

“If it’s just catching some stupid raccoon, I’m sure you can do it yourself, Teach.“ the were-lion grumbled crossing his arms under his chest. (you were looking respectfully okay🙏)

“Grrr! How many times do I have to tell you! I’m not a raccoon“ Grim whined, “I- the great Grim will become the greatest mage ever!!!“

“It certainly has moxie,“ Azul mused “Care to help me, Riddle?“

“I certainly can’t overlook those who break rules. Let’s hurry and get this over with.“ The angry red-head (now known as Riddle) glared daggers at Grim.

“OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!“

note : ignore all plotholes (or else)🐺🐺

[midnightcreator12]

So about that Live Action Avatar

....so, I don't think its going to be good....but I'm going to TRY and give the Netflix Avatar a shot....

.....this is just my thoughts during episode 1....and I'm trying very hard to not be biased but...eh...

Apparently we suffer from the same affliction as Shamalan: For some reason, we have to make the bending look slow as hell and lack any kind of power.

Oh, but hey, you killed a dude on screen. Nice, are we gonna see the darker sides of murder via bending?

Why tf is Aang flying without the glider? No, he's not falling slowly, he is FLYING. Boy thinks he's superman out here.

I'll give you the Aang and Gyatso bonding, I appreciate that. Love what you're doing with that.

Apparently, the writers think I can't remember basic information because they've told me FOUR TIMES 'The Avatar, the only one who can master all four elements' you gonna tell me again later.

Why is Aang freaking out at being the Avatar? He's a ten-year-old boy, any kid would be hyped. I GET the not wanting to leave bit but he's just instantly like 'no, no, I'm not the Avatar' I get we're in a rush but please tell me he's not gonna act like a full-fledged adult.

Appa! You look good buddy!

So, Aang KNOWS that the Fire Nation is planning to start a war before he gets iced....I feel like this undermines how HARD the emotional hit is going to be when he realizes he's the only Air Bender left.

That gut punch when he finds Gyatso's body hits so hard because Aang doesn't know how BAD things have gotten. From where he's standing in the cartoon, he ran but after his ice nap, he calmed down and was like 'okay, I'm ready now!' But then he gets smacked with the 'last of his kind' trope and it firmly shows him how serious this war is.

....he's totally gonna be acting like a grown ass man through this.

APPARENTLY FIRE BENDERS CAN FUCKING FLY TOO, WHAT THE FU-

On-screen murder number 2 and, yeah, the bending looks cool here!

The fire nation is human cannonballing themselves into the temple, what the heck is that??

I do give the show props for showing the genocide of the Air Nomads.

Whhhhhy is there so much slow-mo showing nothing?? Did Shamalan help shoot this??

We have flashed forward and...as much as I appreciate the time in the temple, I still feel like it's going to undermine the emotional impact when Aang goes back. Part of why that scene hit so hard was because, up until then, there was reasonable doubt that all the air-benders were truly gone. Now, anyone coming in who has watched the toon already knows that but the hit when we see the bones of Gyatso, after sending two episodes with Aang being a goofy lil ten year old.....yeah, it won't make as much of an impact for new people coming in.

Hey Katara....WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN THE FIRE NATION BOAT!? WHY ARE YOU PRACTICING BENDING IN THE FORBIDDEN BOAT!?

Good sibling dynamic, off to a very good start.

Wait, she's not allowed to practice?? I thought the writers said they were ditching the sexism??

Hmmm, no, no. I liked it better when Katara got pissed and cracked the ice so Aang could come up. Also she's very meek so far. Sokka snaps at her to quit worrying about waterbending and she just...backs off?? I'm reaaaaally hoping that this issue will not stick.

Sokka...the boat is still close enough to grab....just...get it...

Oh hi Zuko! Did they do your scar right this time?

Nope! You showed SEVERAL people being BURNED ALIVE, but Zuko just forgot to put on sunblock? Did...did everyone just MISS the fact HALF HIS FACE IS BURNED TO HELL?!

Also, apparently, Katara just trying to pull the boat was enough to crack the iceberg?? No, still liked it better when she got mad and snapped open half the ocean. (do not make her meek, do NOT make her meek, I will tap out if you took her fucking fire)

Sokka: Nice, we're not gonna die. K, okay, that was funny. Good thing you're still funny so far Sokka.

....I don't know why yet.....but I don't like this Iroh....he's too....upfront.

Wait, Zuko is looking to get the throne??? wtf, NO, that makes his motivations just like every other fire nation General or Noble. I liked it better when he was a kid desperately trying to get back into his dads good graces by restoring his honor. wtf is this 'I am destined to be fire lord' bs?!

Okay, Aang can just FLY NOW! I GUESS!

Wh- why is Gran-Gran reciting the intro. WE JUST SAW THAT! I FEEL OFFENDED THAT YOU KEEP REPEATING INFORMATION TO ME!

Yeah, just cause you recited the og intro doesn't make you clever! That was a weird-ass segue into that.

Gran-Gran might as well have an 'Inset coin for exposition that we just saw' sigh on her neck.

OOP! There's Iroh aaand he's gone...you had it and then you didn't.

There's some Katara bite. More of that, please.

No, no, I don't like Sokka just going straight to 'Turn Anng over to the fire nation' Yeah, his attack was pathetic but at least he FOUGHT in the cartoon. Here he's just 'welp, see ya kid' ....guess they had to replace the sexism with just zero empathy.

Yay, Katara has some bite! ....shame it undermind Sokka.

The scene cuts are weird...the pacing just jumps all over the place.

I do not like Iroh flipping between 'serious, straightforward' and 'lol, I'm just a silly old man' PICK ONE!

Oh so NOW Aang suddenly can't fly.

Called it, having Aang know what happened right off the bat makes the impact hit less. So him going Avatar mode feels outta place as hell.

Again with the weird scene cuts.

Pft, aw, Zuko has a conspiracy board

Aaaand that was episode 1

....This feels like a checklist. Like when Disney remakes just go through all the most memorable bits of the cartoon because 'thats what the people want, right?' But they're skipping around all the buildup that helped MAKE those highlights hit so hard.

Scenes are rearranged and there is potential there but the choices made just...undermine the moments that are supposed to really hit us.

The kids do well acting but Gran-Gran looks like a younger woman with a wig on and all she does is quote the cartoon.

Katara has moments where her spitfire personality comes through but most of the time shes being very meek and backs down from conflict. The only time she doesn't is to convince Sokka 'hey, don't sell out the 10 year old to the fire nation.

And this is having the same pacing issues that the Live film had. They rush scenes that need to be slow and hold on bits that don't need to be slowed down.

I give the show props for effects and occasionally the bending looking good and for showing people being burned alive but the things it does right are outnumbered by the wrongs so far.

Maybe it'll get better as it goes but...I doubt it.

[spiderh0rse]

felix's mind notes part 5, e21-22 + dreams/ytps and Felix's Mind Forever

e21

Barney's calling over the radio

Felix's vision is kind of all over the place right now

Felix is panicking big time. Saying advice to himself about how to stay alive

just rambling honestly

jumping over hoppers i can only assume

his HEV suits medical systems kick in the instant he's done killing the strider

kind of surprised to see his blood all over the wall

he's in Bad Shape physically and knows it too

finally remembers Alyx's name!

and that's s1 done with!

e22

Felix please we do not need more recap. We do NOT need all the recap this show has given us

well this is excellent cinematography for a no-budget machinima but. but we don't need it

oh he remembers everything!

dramatic pan over the crashed train

Felix's legs! And the rest of him! He's in once piece he's just very very bloody

season 2!

Gordon flashback,, he seems to have helped Felix get a job at Black Mesa. Was not present when their parents died though

"Some wounds never heal."

blood loss hittin Felix HARD

he's stumblin down the train. The HEV suit insists he's about to die and kicks in the EMERGENCY MEDICAL SYSTEMS

Loud electric whine and discharge right as Felix lands facefirst in some water

the HEV suit fixes up the wound as best it can, but Felix still passes out. Alyx wakes him up

one of Felix's worse mornings! Even worse than the one he woke up with the batman ass tattoo

"I live to die another day."

apotheosis, huh...

Felix you're making so many references

"yeah I'm fucked up but I'm up" me every single day of my life

Felix seems. More somber. Odd. Unlike him.

the rain is cold :(

e7.5

wait for it...

RICKROLL

this seems to be an oddly re-edited version of a Barney's Mind episode. Which i have seen but don't remember

Felix rides by on the tram

they're out of sun chips,, AND doritos. Soda time :>

Pepsi, put it in a water bottle, people will just think it's Doctor Pepper! This gets Barney fired

Barney left to Maine and changed his name to Riley Ian

CHELL. you're not my beloved knockoff rychotech Chell but you're fine you're nice

serious injuries are the idea of these tests but fun and learning may occur

ring of fire!! I love this song

Chell can FUCK

THE PORTAL LEAD TO HELL.

Chell was forced to watch whinefield

oh hey Adrian! Most qualified to fight Klondike bars even without his waterproof suit or a high powered vending machine

Klondike bar will not leave his hand

DR PEPPER

this is just mindrian

"I'm gonna go in without a labcoat cuz I'm a sneaky fuck >:]"

Adrian makes it to the surface. Giant bomb! Survives the explosion! Fights it! Wins! Cuz he kicks ass!

complicated shit made uncomplicated

eWat?

I can't tell mindversers apart by voice from time to time but I think that's mindrian

stuck in infinite I hope there's another one purgatory

threatens to squeeze his dick at someone

the return of Klondike bar!

doesn't know how to drive a vending machine

"can you taste the delicious klondike bar? it tastes like ass!"

many words here are cut out and replaced with a very deadpan "dick"

Adrian now fights a mortar ass and moves on to bigger and better things

now stars as batman!

mountain dew plus swiss cheese Felix smell...

destabilizing a yoyo!

meep meep in Canada,,

PRICE? SOAP

one million dollar flashlight

background music engaged

Chell. "I'm like cereal"

Chell fiddling with words and being goofy

that is how we burn it black mesa style

bouncing puzzle to get that mountain dew pumping

the wall could be waffles

letter q,,

very nice lullaby followed by Felix noises. Adrian noises??

Felix's Mind Forever

UAGH flashing images

Felix's first words are contemplating throwing himself off a cliff

bemoans that the sand would break his fall just enough to not let him die instantly

anticipates the guy who lost his. Pal. Will immediately kill himself

Felix says he's had enough of edginess for now

knew someone named Chad once

not killing himself because he's on an adventure!

his bloodlust is sated from all this murder.

not his regular lust.

"tada! :)"

wants to die by firing squad

just glad his weapons are easy to pick up and understand

seesaw puzzles :(

used to find the physics puzzles novel but not anymore

he's HUNGRY. hasn't eaten anything in roughly twenty years. Heehee.

wants lasagna

he's very good at the floor is lava.

uncontested champion, even, since pushing Gordon off the roof. Was stuck on the roof for 13 hours.

got punched in the balls by a rock em sock em

FINALLY beat no nut november

so excited about the new prospects for things to have sex with

BIG xenophilia fan

could go for a vortigaunt, an antlion...

considers humans very horny animals

thinks he's thought about his penis long enough for now. Says he'll do it more later.

doesn't like engineers but respects architects

huh. Well I guess this is slur count one.

squeaks at the antlion queen

"don't get too close you'll make me horny! You wouldn't like me when I'm horny!"

[blimbo-buddy]

The knights are kind of 50/50 yeah they're basically cops but also they're better than cops.

Tigerstar takes over Windclan and Riverclan and most of Shadowclan and Thunderclan is basically taking refuge at Pawshire and the kingdoms are in emergency meeting because "Oh fuck, this guy actually wants to start a war and killed Bluestar."

That's how Rusty and Sandstorm start hittin' it off. There is some teasing but it lightens up a little when they're working together to try and stop this horrible war.

Might I add, there hasn't been an actual full on battlefield war attack in ages and mostly hostile one-off disputes.

It ends with the Empire coming and taking Tigerstar's life Scourge style with their sickass metal claws and then it's Darkest Hour but also not Darkest Hour because the Empire wants to kill the remaining clan cats.

So now all the clans have a common enemy and they chase off the Empire but the Empire is like, "This isn't over. As long as those clans continue to exist! As long as they continue to breathe their horrible lies and spread their brainwashing we'll never die!" before doing a tactical retreat.

Rusty is asked to become leader of Thunderclan as he helped lead the clans and did the most in their dire need.

He says he'll think about it and Sandstorm waits for him at the border for his decision.

that's my basic plot outline that still needs gaps to be filled as I'm just marking down major events, changing them, and trying to work it all into cohesion. I'm actually quite proud and Rusty's desicion ends up being like Aang's from Avatar the Last Airbender where he doesn't have to choose A or B. He chooses the secret and hidden C option.

Ah I see I see. 'Least the original Police system disappeared alongside the humans I suppose. Let's hope the Kingdoms don't repeat the same mistake.

Imagining the Thunderclan cats weren't the happiest with taking refuge in the Kingdoms, but they needed to swallow their fucking pride if they were to all end up surviving. Although yeah I imagine the panic the Kingdoms were going through in that meeting meanwhile Thunderclan is just standing around not sure what to do. Imagine SilverStream nervous and worried about the state of her Clan during the take over. Yeah, they treat her like an enemy now, but what about her father? And her cousins? Imagine how devastated she is when she hears that StoneFur was executed.

I think in terms of "realism" it makes more sense for TigerStar to die like that if the claws were metal. Still badass either way though, always gotta keep that in, y'know. Me staring at the trope of "character(s) whose drive for vengeance becomes their own downfall and makes them repeat the same cycle of needless bloodshed" on the table with a big ass goofy grin.

Loving the route that you're taking with Rusty, woah boy wonder what his decision will be!

[walder-138]

Hey! ♥️ I have questions for the ask game!

2. Is your OC a loner or a social butterfly? Are they satisfied with how they come across to other people?

13. How important are romantic relationships to your OC? Do they prefer casual sex, short flings, or long term relationships? Do they want to get married or are they content with what they have? Or do they have no interest in romance whatsoever?

20. Has your OC ever done something terrible and lied about it? Did they run away or blame someone else for it? How long did they maintain the lie and did the truth ever come out?

I have no much hope for Oz and Annika for the last question. 💀

Hey Sheena! Thanks for sending in an ask! <3

[VERY LONG ANSWER. SORRY POOKIE 😭]

2. Oz is extremely awkward and unintentionally a loner. He’s a funny guy, but dude struggles to keep up a conversation for longer than 5 mins before it turns awkward.

Oz wants to come off as awkward as he hates small talk. The more off-putting he is, the less likely they will annoy him with dumbass questions.

Annika loves talking. A lot. She has no qualms going up to a random ass stranger and starting a conversation. She knows when people are annoyed, she just genuinely couldn’t care less. Annika’s a professional yapper.

Annika has the exact opposite of social anxiety, so she doesn’t care about how she’s perceived.

Abbey leans more towards to social butterfly side, as she genuinely enjoys connecting with people. However, she gets nervous very easily, and tends to avoid speaking too much unless she’s spoken to. Basically, Abbey waits for other people to acknowledge her before she starts talking.

Abbey definitely doesn’t like how people see her. People often take her for a pushover because of her personality, but that’s far from the truth. She wishes more people would take her seriously. Just because Abbey doesn’t get angry often, doesn’t mean she’ll let someone walk over her.

13. (Boy oh boy where do I even begin)

Extremely. Oz has never experienced a true, loving, and lasting relationship in his 40 years on the planet. He YEARNS for the loving embrace of a woman, and not just for one night. Having a wife, kids, a dog, and a white picket fence, y’know, the typical nuclear family was his big dream in life. Until Annika had to be an asshole and turn the world into a nuclear wasteland while blaming the US💀

Annika’s a lesbian, in the USSR, and it’s the early 80s. Yeah, girl isn’t having a love life anytime soon. She doesn’t bother longing for what she can’t have, but she occasionally has flings with other women. Nothing serious, cause it couldn’t be serious. Is she content with that? HELL NAH. Annika sees couples on the street and she wishes she could have that.

Abbey would worry way too much to pursue any of three. She would need a strong emotional bond with someone to even consider a relationship. Romance isn’t what’s important to Abbey, but it’s having a strong connection that matters. But with the amount of people she lost both during her childhood and as an FBI agent, Abbey’s waiting for the next person she gets close to spontaneously disappear.

One thing these three goofy goobers have in common: they all long for the loving embrace of a human, but they’re all “too fucked up” to allow themselves to have that. And it’s like come on guys grow and change as people already 😭

Sheena, you were right. Annika and Oz are NOT beating the allegations 💀

20)

(Gotta get through a chunk of backstory for this to make sense)

TLDR: Oz let his dad die of a heart attack, then left him there.

During the peak of Oz’s addiction, right after he got out of the first round of rehab and almost a year after his honorable discharge, he was living back with Old Man Clancy and his mother. Now, Old Man Clancy both psychologically and physically abused Oz for most of his life, and he constantly taunts Oz for being a junkie, which was making him relapse more often.

(Back to the question)

Old Man Clancy had a heart attack just as Oz entered the house with groceries. He was sitting at the table with a dirty magazine gripped in his hands. Oz ran over to the home phone, and was about to dial 911 until… he just didn’t. He put the rotary phone back before he dialed the other “1”. Oz stared into Old Man Clancy’s eyes as his gurgling noises filled the room. And Oz just stared until he knew he was dead.

Oz put the groceries back in his car, and drove off into oblivion. He never told any of his siblings, or even his mother, that he was there and could’ve stopped Old Man Clancy’s death. His sister, Eve, was the only person who figured it out, but she didn’t say anything.

My batshit crazy pookie bear, where do I begin? Damn, this is hard lol. Girl was, is, and will always be a terrible person (at least in the nuke ending; she redeemed herself after the canon ending)

(BACKSTORY AGAIN! SORRY 😭)

TLDR: Annika killed an entire family that was on Perseus’ shitlist. When operatives found her, instead of telling them it was a hit, Annika told them she did it because “the father didn’t have any balls to steer the USSR in the right direction.”

For Annika, it’s definitely the reason why she actually joined Perseus in the first place. She was raised in organized crime, cruelty’s been in her blood since she was born. See, girlie was only 17 and she was already about two whoopsies away from getting sent to the Gulag.Annika really didn’t want to get sent to the Gulag, but she still had people she needed to ‘sweep under the rug’ so she wouldn’t also have the mob up her ass.

Despite the threat, outstanding warrants for her arrest, sustaining an eye injury that made light painful to look at, her father’s death, and not having anyone to protect her, Annika proceeded to preform another hit. She painted a family’s brains on a fucking hallway.

Perseus wanted to know who did it, and after two weeks they grabbed my girlie off the street. Annika was like “Oh fuck the KGB got me. I’m either gonna be in the Gulag or an oblong box.” So she decided to ‘negotiate’ for death. Meaning: She’d piss them off so much they kill her so doesn’t get sent to the Gulag. She shit-talked the entire structure of the Soviet government and their incompetence of handling the West’s threats. Annika said that’s why she killed them, for what the father’s ignorance.

Perseus believed that Annika killed them for the father’s incompetence, and not because she was paid good money for it. Nobody found out she was bullshitting until 2 years after she became an operator 💀

TLDR: Abbey gave the man responsible for her and her friend’s brainwashing severe chronic pain for the rest of his life by shooting him 6 times, then saving him.

Definitely the least morally repugnant person out of the trinity. I think we all know who the worst person is 💀

I’m getting lazy, and there’s too much to unpack with the last one, so I’m gonna limit it to two paragraphs max.

Just take the TLDR, and I’ll tell you the aftermath. Abbey arrests him and takes him into custody. They asked her how she didn’t manage to land any lethal shots on him out of the 8 shots she fired. Abbey just tells them “He’s a lucky guy” instead of telling them she intentionally save him so he would have to deal with the pain for the rest of his life.

Nobody believed Abbey, obviously, but they thought she saved him out of the goodness of her heart. They didn’t know that Abbey had so much hatred for the man that she thought death was too merciful for him. If she gave him a critical injury, he’d be recovering from it for the rest of his life, even if he escaped.

Dude I need to get better at shortening posts. This is the shortened version. I feel like I just wrote the declaration of independence. Nobody’s gonna make it this far. 💀

Thank you again though! Hope you weren’t expecting a quick read 💀

[mjammies]

maxon come back plzzz (the elite)

ch21-24

Ch 21 

-not the king and maxon leaving to go to asia

-maxon must be 5’8 the way they be describing him

-”call ahead and tell them to go easy on us” maxon you gotta be kinding if you think this girl got ties like that

-oop kriss is taking itttttttt 

-i hate america i really do but this kinda behavior with kriss woulda had me tweaking tf out fr

-”you are such an idiot sometimes” gurl arent you tryna win him and you calling him a dummy

-”he noted the homemade bracelet I wore. He studied it, seeming confuse, then kissed my hand tenderly” america better pray that maxon dont know what the guards buttons look like. America really dumb af.

-not anne finding aspen in america room omgg can somebody jump him plzz, where the hell is this rod when you really need it.

-”he was in plain clothes, not his uniform” bro i think aspen was meant to be a 6 cause this level of ignorance is unmatched.

-”maxon is gone. This changes everything.” ummmmm no it does not, goofy 

Ch 22

-atp they shoulda put cameras in all the rooms cause im tired of them sneaking around

-i dont even wanna read this bitch ass chapter 

-”i dont like talking about him anyway” ofc you dont, only cause he tryna take your girl

-”and the injections, too” yall getting fed and bbls??

-my thing is if aspen really wanted to make change wouldnt he let america be a princess since she'll actually speak out about all the nonsense going on. Cause if you take her, maxon is gonna marry someone else and the exact same shit is going to continue to happen.

-”slowly, he lowered me to the mattress of pillows” i want them both to die

-”there was a newfound confidence there, something instilled in him through becoming a two” why not a one, imagine the confidence a one could have 

-”when this was all over, would i be a two or a one?” bro this wack ass caste system. The only reason cass set it up like this was to make it seem like there was a real competition here, but wth kinda comp is it between a prince and a guard, like sir you are THE HELP,

-america is just greedy asf, maybe she needs a poly relationship since she cant chose. 

Ch 23

-”but elise family says they never arrived” oop the prince and king is mia

-not the king saying they there but elise family wth is they at

-not kriss pulling her in the garden to chat about maxon, this finna get juicy

-”i think you and i might be neck and neck at this point” oooppp she saying yall is equally in the running omggg

-”anyway, he loved it. He said no one had given him a present yet”. Damnnnnnn america you really missed the ball on that opportunity

-omggg he done took kriss to his room and not even miss thing has been

-”anyway he started visiting me during pretty much every free moment he had” im gonna be sick

-he aint even try to kiss her yet, good

-”i dont know how you feel, but i love him” damn. Miss home of the brave couldnt even say that and here go kriss confusing easilyyy

-not the rebels demanding they end the selection, yall dont like a little drama lol

CH24

-broo imma need maxon to get back and soon

-”what if maxon was dead?” girl dont act like you care

-oop waitaminute the king and maxon are coming home tonighttttt, thank god

-”kriss left seconds later. Maybe she was making a welcome home card.” lol i sure hope so

-not the maids fightingggg

-are the maids not also a two? See this why this caste system doesnt work 

-oh wait nvm i guess not

-she back to reading gregory’s diary, im not reading all that tho yall be easy

-damn he wrote a lot

-not she tryna look decent for maxon, i know thats right

-awww not him gifting her a blue bracelett, i need someone who will think about me in a whole different country

-”i didnt find anything for anyone else” period

-broo this could all be hers, but she so slowww 

-”im just really confused about you rn.” GIRL hes the one whose been confused about YOU

-”if you ever want to know anything about me… all you need to do is ask.” now THAT is a man

-”i dont know if im ready to do that yet” whats the number to this palace, im calling in a bomb threat myself 

-maxon gone for days, yall thinking he died, he returns, and this is how yall communicate when he gets back palease.

[wave2tyun]

I'm here after writing a physical list of songs to reccomend!!😼 I'll start with my n.1 group, Stray Kids!! :D I started listening to them a bit over a year and a half ago but by now my life is consumed by them... 🙃

Here's my (long) list of slay songs! (Do note most of the songs I'm reccomending are very energetic because I'm more drawn to energetic songs, they have lots of songs that are calmer etc, so if you like different kinds of songs you're definitely going to be able to find loads!!)

Noeasy:

-Thunderous (the title track, INCREDIBLE music video‼️)

-Wolfgang (the furry song of the group just like Cat & Dog is for txt👍 their kingdom performance for this is incredible)

-Cheese (song for the haters, it's about cheese though?? Love the wordplay, they're really good at creative lyrics)

-DOMINO (ayy domino😎, we never got the mv for this😔💔)

-Silent Cry (I really love this one, super pretty and cool sounding!!)

-SSick (I'm saur ssick, another banger, I love the instrumental of this lots)

-Red Lights (duet between Hyunjin and Bang Chan, the n.1 sexy song of the group)

ODDINARY:

-Charmer (SUPER banger, the instrumental is crazy good!)

-Venom (I personally think this one is underrated, they once perfirmed this with like a giant spider??? idek anymore)

-Lonely St. (just another great ass song imo💞)

-Muddy water (half the group is in this one and there's another song with the rest, I just happen to like the style of this one better, very different to most of their songs imo)

Maxident:

-Super Board (one of my absolute favorite skz songs of all time, nyoom!! cool music video👍)

-Chill (a sadder song?? on my reccomendation list?? Han Jisung loml writes the best sad songs argue with the wall)

-Taste (another sexy song, oh my god this one is crazy😵)

-Don't stop (a cute almost anime opening sounding duet with the 2 youngest, CUTE!!)

-Case 143 (silly title love song, I reccomend watching all the mvs you can find tbh, they're always really good!!)

In Life:

-Back Door (underappreciated!!!😠 slept on, why didn't people love this more, incredible choreography too!! deserves so much more)

-The Tortoise and the Hare (ages ago people had theories 3racha (the producers of the group) were drunk while making this, I think people just weren't used to songs that were 'different', honestly SUPER cool)

5-star:

-Super Bowl (cooking up a storm peace of cake‼️ this one's in english, first skz album i ever ordered btw)

-ITEM (Banger!!!!! Big Reccomend!! Cool choreography)

-Get Lit (the english translation of the korean title is "let's die" don't let that fool you though, this is a super cool song, my favorite on the album)

-Youtiful (song in english, it's about how beatiful stay (their fandom) is to them, my lovely skz😭)

Rockstar:

-Lalalala (title track of their newest album, super banger, just feel the rock!!)

-Megaverse (welcome to the stray kids hot megaverse, once again... really Really good!!)

-Comflex (my favorite from this album, you can really tell i like more energetic "quick" songs by looking at all my favorites, huh? 😅)

Other:

-God's Menu (pretty much everyone knows this one, the one that blew them up, still incredible after all these years)

-Circus (a song about the circus, goofy and silly but still super good? Love this one💞)

-Christmas EveL (christmas song? similar to Circus, goofy but unnecessarily good... Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad, I can feel the evil coming but Felix never bad😎)

Lmao anyway that was my list, watch mvs if you're interested, I'll do Ateez later!!

Also I haven't listened to a lot of earlier music yet so there's definitely lots of other good songs that are just waiting to be discovered😁 Hope you enjoy Alex dear💞💞 sorry it's so long...

-🐾

my dearest comforting kitty anon you are TOO CUTEEEEEE!!!!!🥹🥹🥹💓💖💓💘💞💘💖 i might????? cry??????????😞😞😞 i absolutely love how you wrote down the respective albums for each song PLUS the little comments you wrote for them??????? i put them all in a playlist in this same order😼😼💞 (the 2 kitties in the pic are you and me btw<3) and i'll make sure to check out some mvs too cause i think i've only ever seen like 3 of them!! :00 hellevator is one of them i actually watched it when it first came out😳 time really flies cause omg it's actually been so many years since then??

thank you so much for taking your time to write this list for me i really appreciate it!!! :(((((💓💖💘💞💓💞💘 i'll make sure to let you know my thoughts + favorites and omg i'll look forward to the ateez one as well!! :DD<33

[maguro13-2]

Hiromu Arakawa : [grumbles] Kamierabi. Kamierabi. Alright. Mr Ohkubo, you have your chance with video game legend Yoko Taro to of getting your show on the air after you abandoned your own manga characters that you left to die! And now the Ohkuboverse is gone because of you, ya idiot! Well, at least the new protagonist I introduced has now become the new star on the Gangan Joker magazine line. Fine! I'll just watch the first episode of Yoko Taro's new show that fans of Soul Eater wanted to look at. Wonder what's this show about any way?

"After watching the first episode..."

Yoko Taro : My first animated tv show is finally on the air during the block program on Fuji TV, fans of Nier are really going to see this one in action! So what do you think of it, Arakawa? What did you think of it!?

Atsushu Ohkubo : So, did you like it....?

(pauses for a moment)

*crickets chirping*

Hiromu Arakawa : ....(holds out a guitar)

*GUITAR SMASH!*

Hiromu Arakawa : Kamierabi, my ass! Who needs to watch this crap anyway? I'm going over to Wit Studio to have Moonrise in production! Didn't have time to waste my time for this CGI trash!

(door closes)

(birds chirping)

Yoko Taro : (goofy voice] I think that I am a genius. Does anybody have an cube of ice for a pack to heal myself? I didn't realize that I was planning Death Game show since Future Diary.

Atsushi Ohkubo : [goofy voice] Told ya I get that she still pisses me off about that! I designed the characters to look like the ones from the manga

Yoko Taro : [in a normal voice] But hey, if you were in charge of designing the characters to look like the ones from your manga, what happened to the Ohkuboverse that existed in Real World AU? And more importantly, what happened to the previous protags you created!?

"Meanwhile..."

Shotaro : Hey, let us go! Looks like we got ourselves on the wrong foot! The truth is we lied about the Ohkuboverse, Demon Vibe. Look, The Shadow Realm is cool! We promise that we beings from the Ohkuboverse to never tell a lie again! This was Shinra's idea that he started!

Shinra : What!? I told you that I was gonna bring hope to win, but you didn't let Truth from FMA to believe that the Ohkuboverse we lived in was a facade and now it's your fault that you got me and everyone else into this mess!

Tsugumi : What!? Our fault!? Everything was perfect in the Ohkuboverse until the Time Eater came and destroyed it to reveal that Soul World was completely a facade!

Shinra : If the Men of my influence wouldn't been hiding the truth from all of you, you would be all too stupid that the villains we faced in the ohkuboverse has been puppets on a string to Demon Vibe! The entire time

Tsugumi : Well, that's the problem about dealing with heartlesses in the first place! Right, Maka? Maka...?

Shinra : I think she's still in Real World AU with her boyfriend, Makoto. That Phantom guy.

Shotaro : Then where did the Time Eater brought someone that isn't Maka Albarn and is from the 1930s?

Time Eater : Time to take out the trash! Sending you to the place where you belong!

Inky Albarn : What? No! What do you think you're doing!? Please don't do this to me! I liked being the hero of Soul World, I got a reputation of being a meister. I'm Maka Albarn and I'm the coolest, I can't go back to the 1930s right now! I disguised myself as the one and only Maka Albarn, I have authority for being a shounen protag! No wait! I didn't deserve this! I deserve to be the most respected hero in the World! I swear it! The world of Soul Eater is mine! I can change the author's ways of- [The Time Eater sends her into the portal to 1930s au] NOOOOO....*fades*

Shinra : Well this sucks! We're gonna be stuck here forever!

Tsugumi : I thought being a hero would be cool! Thanks a lot, Shinra!

Shotaro : Yeah, Shinra! This is all your fault!

Shinra : Oh bite my shiny metal--

Demon Vibe : Silence! Your transgressions has caused me nothing but trouble! It's time that I give your attitude a new meaning to what it means to be the great and powerful Demon Vibe that I am! To put yourselves into submissions for your reckless way in Angel Vibe's plans, the same way as your foolishness of being heroes.

Shinra : No...No...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

~ Farwell Heroes of the Ohukoboverse, Forever! ~

[nerdycrusadecomputer]

Guess who's back??? Back again! 😎

Hello beautiful cutie,first of all,i know,you write my request not to much time ago (that i already read it and it's just *chef kiss*) but,my mind is goin crazy with some new ideas and y'know,sharing is caring right?

I'm not gonna drop all of them,just one for now. Ok ok,Rise!Leo (yeah,he is my favorite,how do you know???) x reader (female or neutral your choise) in they first make out. Little suggestive? Maybe but,in my mind this would be so goofy in the begin like,no one knowing what to do just trying to see if it's work and then, finally in the end they get it lol.

The next one will be another bet,just you wait! 😏♥️

YESSIR!!! Imma write this as soon as i can xD

Key words: Y/n - your name

Leo x gn!reader

Warnings: maybe some suggestive content, but nothing other than ass grabbing-

Leo would not know what to do

My man wouldn't even know where to put his hands 😂

I just imagine the first time you actually started to make out, you had to ask

And the whole time you two are laughing your asses off, not knowing what to do

Like Leo as soon as it starts to get heated just start laughing out of nowhere

Which leads to you laughing

"LEO STOP FUCKING LAUGHING-"

"I can't, it's just funny!"

But he'll get the hang of it really quick, trust me

Like as soon as his laughs die down, he would be grabbing Your waist or ass as you intensely make out

Maybe his two walked in on you once or twice, but we'll never know!

Here is how I think their first make out session would go:

Leo and Y/n were sitting on his bed, just reading a comic together, when Y/n suddenly had n idea

She smirked as she looked towards Leo

"Hey Leo?" She started, receiving a hum from Leo, as to say the he was listening

Y/n pulled out a price of paper and handed it to Leo, he grabbed it as he playfully rolled his eyes and read the paper

'Free make out session' it read

"You know you could he just asked, not hand this out like it's some sort of secret code." Leo said as he turned towards his partner, putting his comic to the side

Y/n quickly sat in his lap as they wrapped their arms around his neck

"Just wanted to be extra." They said s they Leones closer to his face

He rested his arms on her waist as he pressed his lips against hers

His hands slowly lowered as he squeezed their ass, earning a squeak from his partner

He giggled at their squeak as Y/n just rolled their eyes

"Stop squeezing my ass, you fuckin' horny ass bitch." They said as Leo bursted out laughing, Y/n tried to contain their laughter as they gently slapped his face

"Stop laughing! This is supposed to be hot!" They whisper yelled, but his laughter only increased

"I swear to God, I am going to kill myself because of you." They whispered

"No- *laugh* no no no, here I'll- I'll stop-" he giggled as he tried to stop his laughter as he connected their lips again

They slowly got in to it when Leo licked Y/n's bottom lip, they opened their mouth as Leo out his tongue in and explored every crevice

Just as things were getting heated a certain someone interrupted

"Hey Nardo, do you see my favori- OH MY FREAKING GOD-"

Y/n quickly jumped from Leo's lap as they sat down criss cross applesauce

"Oh hey Donnie- good to see ya, how've you been?" Leo said, trying not to make things awkward

"Nardo- *sigh* Listen, if you just tell me where my favorite screwdriver is, i will pretend... That, didn't happen, okay?" Donatello said as he covered his eyes

"It's in your pocket, now forget about this, and if you tell anyone i will eat you alive-"

"Okay thanks Nardo and Y/n, totallydidn'tseeyoumakeoutoranything- bye!" Donnie quickly scurried off

"Well... Where were we again?"

That is all, hope you liked it :)

[delirious-donna]

V, O, and G for Kakashi if you haven’t done those already! Love your writing btw 🧡

NSFW Alphabet [Kakashi Hatake]

an: Azurelyy, you absolute cutie! Thank you so much, it means a lot ^^ I've written V for the handsome Hatake but I will write the other two for you, my dear. I hope you enjoy! ^^

Masterlist

G - Goofy

Kakashi is a massive goofball, he really is a big kid at heart. It’s no wonder he gets on so well with his students, he enjoys a good prank as much as they do - although, preferably not at his expense! He often takes to chasing you around the house, ripping shrill squeals from your throat as he leaps over furniture like a gazelle to cut off your escape route. His fingers wiggle in wicked delight as he stalks closer, your back pressed against the wall you’ve been trapped against. It’s a 50/50 bet as to whether he is gonna tickle you until you are begging him to stop, concerned you might just wet yourself on the rug, or he is gonna hoist you up and over his shoulder like you weigh nothing. Playfully smacking you on the ass as he strides confidently for the bedroom. The silver/haired Adonis can often be found giggling away to himself as he reads the latest Icha Icha book, finding the illustrations and actions being depicted utterly hilarious. You’re used to this, along with the rest of his nonsense. It’s quite cute really, yeah, when he is sneaking up on you during a scary movie just to make you scream and jump, it’s annoying as fuck, but can you truly be mad? Kakashi wouldn’t do this if he didn’t feel comfortable with you. You love your goofball.

O - Oral

Oh damn, this is surely one of Kakashi’s favourite activities. He considers himself a true master in the art of ‘eating pussy’, and this is said to you with an entirely straight face. It’d be funny if it wasn’t completely true. If eating out pussy was a competitive sport, he’d definitely be in the final every year, if not the reigning and undefeated champion. It’s as if he has a magic mouth, it’s the best way you can describe it. He makes you feel like you’ve transcended this plane of existence - honestly, it’s not an exaggeration. His wide velvet-tipped tongue laves a hot path back and forth your glistening folds, teasing you before he burrows deeper into your flower. Lips kiss your inner thighs, making them tremble as he hovers ever closer to your aching clit. His nose nudges against your hood, rubbing with just the right amount of pressure to make you grind against his face. That’s his cue to work his tongue into your tight hole, almost digging out your delicious slick - of which, he wastes none. He loves it when you sit on his face, smothered by your thighs and intoxicated by your scent and taste. Kakashi could die here and be ecstatic about it. As for receiving, he prefers to stand. It feeds his slight God complex, looking down on you, so small compared to him and choking on his massive cock. He tries not to fuck your face, he tries not to grip your hair and pull your head deeper onto his shaft, he really does. His long fingers start out stroking your silken strands, watching you through half-lidded eyes as your lips wrap around him like he is the most delicious ice pop you’ve ever tasted. Those fingers deepen into your hair as saliva pools from the sides of your mouth and that first gag has his hips snapping forward on a groan. He’ll fuck your tight little throat, waiting for that moment you dare to unsheathe your teeth and nip at his sensitive skin before he dumps his entire load into your mouth. Making sure to pull back so he can see the pink tongue disappear under his sticky seed. “Mmm, that’s right princess, swallow like the good girl you are. My best girl, huh?"

[yondzone]

Bungou stray dogs relationship headcanons

sfw very sligth nsfw

those under 16 please do only read the sfw part

↰             𓂃              ⌲                   ⌂.

⋆ ☄.⠈⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠂* ; ☔

𝕱𝖎𝖔𝖉𝖔𝖗 𝕯𝖔𝖘𝖙𝖔ï𝖊𝖛𝖘𝖐𝖎

▚ 𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ If you managed to have your way to his heat, then you are definitely one special fellow to him, so only to you and around you he will show is soft persona that he never let anyone see in decade.

⌗ If you end up living together, the little time he his at home he will he bring your breakfast at bed to make up for the fact that he his basically never here.

⌗ He prefer kissing you on the cheek rather than on the lips. And in the morning (if by miracle he didn’t already leave) he’ll automatically kiss you cheek to wake you up. And if he his here before going to sleep he’ll ask for a kiss on the cheek.

⌗ He also like night cuddles (of course he won’t admit it.) he never touched anybody so you give hi this feeling of constant novelty.

⌗ He loves when you are jealous and he is gonna tease you with those word : "you seems jealous, is everything fine ? :)" in fact he hates people but if it means seeing your jealous face he don’t mind playing the womanizer for some minute to just tease you.

▚ 𝖓𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗Fyodor is definitely a top this bitch will rather die than being a bottom.

⌗ He know the effect it have on you when he tie his hair up so you can be sure that evrrytime you do the deed he while have is hair up ✨.

⌗ Low key have a master servant kink that get him going for hours.

⌗ Hes not someone very vocal when you both do it.

⌗ He doesn’t look like this but he his really touchy in the bed.

⌗ Bed is his favorite place he is quite traditional in fact he does not want it in other place rather than the bedroom.

⌗ But he lost his traditionalism the day you introduced to him ‘sex toys’ oh so a new way to torture you without killing you? he’ll take this opportunity gladly.

⌗ One day you tried to be on top and your ‘master’ did not like that so he destroyed you for the whole night.

𝕮𝖍𝖚𝖚𝖞𝖆 𝕹𝖆𝖐𝖆𝖍𝖆𝖗𝖆

▚ 𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ Chuuya is very romantic, like very romantic.

⌗ He likes kisses, giving and receiving, he does not have a favorite place to kiss or to be kissed because he loves hems all.

⌗ When he is stressed or tired (or both), he likes to cuddle you, wine and cuddle are his comfort things.

⌗ Speaking of cuddling, he likes to cuddle you while taking a shower (hot water and rose petals) after all he his very comfortable with you and love your presence

⌗ He feels more confident when you compliment him, and he will shamelessly admit it ‘please compliment me more’

⌗ Chuuya is quite jealous and possessive. If someone tries to hit on you or make a move, he will go feral on this person and make sure everyone in the future who you belong too

⌗ A whore for PDA in public, he will always hold your hand or put his arm around you, so that everyone will see that you are taken.

⌗ He won't tell you that he loves you often, because he prefer action out of words. He's the type of person willing to do anything to drown you in gifts and make you happy.

⌗ If you find something nice or cool, he will buy it for you, just to see you smile. Needy Chuuya want to see you smile

▚ 𝖓𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ He his totally a switch, one day he can feel like a total top and the day after will feel the need to be dominated.

⌗ He like being on top yes, but he prefer it when you are riding him he really love seeing you body from below, its exquisite.

⌗ He is an hips man, he love them. So you being on top of him gives him the opportunity to admire and explore your body.

⌗ Chuuya likes your moans very much, he finds them adorable and it shows that you feel good, which makes him happy.

⌗ Chuuya is vocal, way too much vocal in the bed.

⌗ He his considered as the king of aftercare trust me, its heaven.

𝕯𝖆𝖟𝖆𝖎 𝕺𝖘𝖆𝖒𝖚

▚ 𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ Do not lie to yourself, a relationship with Dazai have high chance of ending not well because of some toxicity he may develop as time goes on.

⌗ He his really possesive, once he got you he wont let you go,never ever.

⌗ He love to kiss you. He loves the taste of your lips and the feeling of kissing you makes him feel something he never had.

⌗ In public, dazai will be the dork he his but… in worse. (yes its possible) he will be playful to death with you.

⌗ While when you are alone, he is much more sentimental but he will continue to remain slightly playful.

⌗ He loves teasing you, if he manage to make you blush, it will makes him continue even more because he finds you oh so adorable when you are embarrassed.

⌗ At night, he will cuddle you while holding you tightly, so that you can feel safe and loved.

▚ 𝖓𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ Dazai doesn't really feel the need to have sex he have better thing to do and never really tough about commitment wit anybody.

⌗ But when it's with you, he will have sex with you after-all all opportunity to your body, he’ll take it.

⌗ Slow and passionate sex over here! He his rarely pn the fast and rough side but if you ask he’ll comply to any of your desire.

⌗ He don't really have favorite position, nor kink except maybe some bondage

⌗ Did I forget that he have a praise kink? Of course receiving and giving,

⌗ Dazai is very vocal, im not talking about moan they are relatively low, but about praise, when you both are doing the deed, praise are overflowing (🦋🦋🦋)

𝕾𝖎𝖌𝖒𝖆

▚ 𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ Sigma never had anything except his casino which his his whole life so at first when he get implied in a relationship he will be clumsy not knowing how human relation work

⌗ He will need guidance from you, he wont make first move simply because he does not know how it work.

⌗ He his kind, really really kind to you. He view you as something very fragile and it will take time for him to comprehend that you are not weak.

⌗ Because he his always in his casino the only moment you can see him his when he his in his office, he barely goes to sleep too occupied maintaining the casino.

⌗ You finally gave him what he desired : reasons to live, you are very much cherished by him.

⌗ And you also need to cherish him and make him gain confidence in himself.

▚ 𝖓𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ He his a bottom he have no social skill and does not know anything about how the society or relationship work as I already said.

⌗ You basically need to do everything and engage everything.

⌗ Your kink are his kink, you’re favorite position is also his favorite.

⌗ The man cry a lot out of pleasure in the bedroom, he his utterly beautiful when he cries.

⌗ As time goes by he will gain in assurance and try to be on top but out of habit he just revert back to being bellow. But please praise him, he tried.

𝕹𝖎𝖈𝖔𝖑𝖆𝖘 𝕲𝖔𝖌𝖔𝖑

▚ 𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ … how did you get yourself into this relationship again?

⌗ do not go out with him I repeat to not go out with him,  at home its okay but when in public he start to theatrically declare his love to you, I promise dying would be better than having to support this embarrassment anymore.

⌗ you know that he love asking rhetorical question right? Just let him be, read a book or play on your phone while he monologue

⌗ the number of nickname you have can’t be counted on two hands

⌗ he forces you to call him by nickname and pet name he himself thought of ‘from now on call me the pineapple of your ocean eyes’ …. the fuck is wrong with his brain, where your first tough

⌗ He always kept on repeating that he wanted to be free and first say to you that you should not hope for him to be sweet or be present but every time you come home he his here patiently waiting on the couch.

⌗ his change of persona really surprise you every time they happen, even after years of dating it’s sill hard for you to grasp his true self, a playful sadistic idiot, or a serious full of guilt person aware of his cruel crime.

▚ 𝖓𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ he his so sadistic, he love to see you cry

⌗ definitely into cosplay and role play in the bedroom ‘today I am the pirate and you my parrot look at those beautiful costume’

⌗ you have an enormous box with all of your disguises

⌗ he have every sex toy possible, may or may not have already bought every sex toy from a store

⌗ usually rough, very rough, and sometime he break the mood with his goofy attitude, he does not mind the mood being broke because he’ll restore it in no time

⌗ they are time he his acting like a narrator as he fuck you ‘then gogol slowly slap her pink ass-’ this is really disturbing

⌗ you can have a little of respite when he decide to have sex with his serious personality respite.

when it happen it’s fast but passionate and stop the joke and the room become silent only filled with both of your moans

[welkinsky]

Can I request Shisui Uchiha for your 100 follower event?? (I hope you write for him?!) And congrats for reaching this ☺️

Shisui Uchiha X Reader

Masterlist

A-Z Headcanon

Warning: 18+ Content

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Shisui is a very kind person and once you both and do it and you're all tired, he'll make sure that he gets all the things to you or will run a bath for both of you to relax if you have enough energy left. And before you come back the sheets are already changed.

B = Body part (Their favorite body part of their partner’s)

Your face. He LOVES to give you kisses all over your face. He adores it so much! Sometimes you catch him zoning out looking at your face in very serious conversations. Which you find adorable but others don't lol. He still can't help it.

You can accept waking up to him adoring or creasing your face in the morning. "You're doing it again" You say with a shy whining voice and cover your face.

He takes your hands off of your face and says in the same whining voice to mock you "Whaaat I like looking at your face, not my fault you're this pretty." And will probably laugh when you get even redder.

C = Cuddling

Oooh as much as he loves being the big spoon, also loves to just lay on top of you.

"Don't sleep again okay?" you asked him to which he answered "Yeah I'm not gonna sleep this time. So how was your day?"

If he's laying on top of you, he'll pass out mid-way your answer. He feels like he can let down his guard for once, it is soooo relaxing for him since he has to be on his toes the entire day.

D = Dirty Secret

He once walked in on you while you were pleasuring yourself. He wanted to but his eyes were stuck on you and the moment you moan his name. He had to go back and find a place to do, you-know-what.

He cannot confront you because it felt like he invaded your privacy.

E = Experience 

You could be his first. He is a ride or die kinda guy so he waited for the right one. You both experience new stuff together.

F = Favourite Position 

He likes you on top FOR SURE. Not a hard dom kind of guy *exceptions are there* so he loves it when you are in control but if you're too tired he WILL switch you over and give your a sweet kiss and then go hard, lol. That kiss was sorry for what is going to happen to you now.

G = Goofy

Okay, he IS THE FUNNIEST person you know. No cap. He has a good sense of humor and can make a good joke out of the most serious conversations to make you laugh. He also does it when you're too tense. Will MAKE a joke out of you being stressed! But he sometimes does this to hide how stressed HE is, so make sure to pay attention to him.

H = Hair 

Before you met him, it was a mess, almost a nest *oh that rhymes* Anyways, you introduced this guy to a thing called "conditioner" and bro his world turned upside down. Is so impressed with his own hair that he cannot stop playing with them as he talks in general.

I = Intimacy 

He is not much into PDA, not because he doesn't like it it is just that it doesn't occur to him. You take his hand he'll pull you in and walk with one hand across your shoulder. Kiss him on a cheek, he'll kiss you back on lips. So he has no problem with PDA he just doesn't remember if that makes sense.

Your emotional intimacy is something to envy. You two feel emotions so strongly for each other or for this relationship. If one is down then the other one CANNOT leave them or feels the worst for doing so. 

J = Jack Off 

Not that often, I mean he has YOU. But if you are on a mission or he is on a mission will do it and that too not that often.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

He likes it when you tease him in public. Because it is just the two of you who know what is going on and nobody else. He will smirk and won't take his eyes off you *and later won't take his hands off you*

Apart from that neck kisses turned him on too, the ones right under the ear.

L = Location (Favourite places to do they do)

He. Will. Take. You. Anywhere. I mean not literally but literally. The waiter is taking too long and you've been teasing him the entire day, a bathroom trip it is, you two are chilling on the top of the mountain, make-out session? No problem. he covers it up with "we only live once" every time.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

When you are nice to others. This really makes him realize how much of a gem you really are and you should be treated like one too. He'll be a soft romantic the entire day and a bit clingy too. Later at night, expect it too.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)

When someone is being rude to you or hurting you in general. He is not particularly mad at you AT ALL. But it really pisses him off and he loses it. He is kind in general, so it really makes him feel bad when people aren't nice and especially to you.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Oh, he LOVES receiving it! Bro this man is a hard dom for this and this only. He loves it when you moan with him in your mouth and when you look up at him and see how much you are enjoying it. Keep eye contact with him and you'll receive it all back 100X, eye contact turns him on that much!

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

He loves to go fast and pound into you but if it is more of an emotional one, then he'll be slow but still hard and deep. He can't do it half-assed after all!

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

He. Is. Always. Down. You have to mention it once and his 100% answer will be "Let's go, but where? Wait I know a spot"

No cap.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Again, he is not afraid to take risks, only if you're into it. But even if you are, he wants to make sure that you're privacy isn't compromised AT ALL.

S = Stamina 

The max you both went was 3 rounds and that is when you got tired. So chances are that he can go more, 4 maybe 5? It still is a mystery.

T = Toy

He likes handcuffs. He sometimes even use them when you're giving him oral. He likes to see how vulnerable you get and he is the one in control. But apart from that, he is open to anything.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He is not that much into him teasing you but you teasing him? Turns him on like hell! He'll get back to you by being rough when he finally gets the chance.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He only means enough for you to hear, his volume usually isn't that loud. He likes it when only you can hear it and bro, moan his name or moan in general in his ears and you are not going to walk straight the next day.

W = Wild Card (Just a random headcanon because I cannot think of anything starting with W)

He told you about the friend that he lost, pretty later in your relationship. You can see it on his face when he is sad or down about that. Just pull him in a hug and make him fall asleep or he won't stop thinking about it. He just wants your company, there is nothing that you or he can do to make it better than just you being with him.

X = X-Ray

He is kinda buffed. Like not hella buffed but still, he is. You love his chest muscles the most and his muscular arms hug too.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

He doesn't have it that often but a very normal and healthy one. Tease him and he'll be down to do it for the next 3 days.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterward)

He can do it and then go on a mission, he doesn't get tired easily. So expect him to make sure that you're asleep and slide out to do a bit of paperwork. He never admits that he does and when you say that he does that he just cracks another joke and avoids the topic. He feels guilty about leaving you alone like that but he is not that free too so he needs to complete his work too.

[sweetpxxches]

The little things in Nevada matter most. (Ch. 1)

Hank/Sanford/Deimos/Reader Fic, baby.

This fic has chapters, so this is the first one! I will link the new chapters as ones go by.

Warnings will be listed here as chapters are made, as of now, Chapter 1 contains:

- Alcohol 

- Mild mentions of gore

- Fluff

This chapter’s just the beginning of finding each other out. This is a lot so heck yeah!

Reader is AFAB and uses gender neutral pronouns. (they/them) ^-^

Chapter list: 1 - ?

It was an early evening in Nevada, you missed the sounds of crickets chirping in the night. But due to the events that happened in this place, there is lack of life that surrounds it. All that is left are demons, clowns, sheriffs, and all that utter nonsense that you question how badly this had to be for a state to become it's new circle of Hell. But at that point, it wasn't really worth thinking too hard on. You instead just think about how at least thankful life was to you to give you friends so your life isn't too lonely. Without Hank, Deimos, Sanford, and 2BDamned, life would of been miserable. Despite what they're here for, the red and black tints of the skies seem blue to you. You were sitting on the edge of a bridge, kicking your legs as you took a sip out of soda can, letting the wind blow passed your hair. But you felt the ground rumble and you swiftly got up to face where it was coming from, and you saw the three familiar figures in a truck. With a sigh of relief, you waved at them and they drove by to you. Sanford poked out at the back of the truck, waving. "Hey, Mercenary! We're heading out to look for some bars around here, you up for that?" You shrugged it off, chugging down the rest of your drink and tossing the can over the bridge. "Sure, why not? Not like I got much better to do. Place has been extra quiet since we've bombed one of those factories earlier." You saw Deimos reached out to you, and you grabbed his arm as he tugged you up between you and Sanford. "Welcome aboard, then!" Deimos laughed, patting your shoulder. You smiled at the two, getting yourself comfortable. You turned your head over to Hank, who looked back and nodded. "Glad to see you in one piece, Merc." He said as he started the engine and began driving off. "Good to see you didn't die again either, Hank." You joked, leaning back. It was almost like things were back to normal, the aura of happiness and the cheerful conversations filled your heart with a sense of serenity. It is a rare occasion just to feel the serenity of friendship. Then again, if you could even consider this as friendship. These three made your heart confused, and so your mind. The more you thought about it, the more it felt like you had decisions to make on the long end. Sanford was the gentle yet mature one in the bunch, his body may be brawns but he was also brains. He didn't take jokes a lot, but sometimes he does choose to have fun with others whenever he can, as well as how caring he is for the group. Sometimes you wonder if he's secretly a major softie who would own rabbits for a living. Then there was Deimos, a cunning and suave guy who most would consider a 'bastard' for how he behaves. Always has a cigarette between his teeth as well as a smug demeanor. You couldn't help but smirk at the times of Deimos trying to show off to you a few times when you first joined the crew, and Hank always telling him to keep his pants on. The one time Deimos even attempted went to failure due to him flexing while trying to shoot with one hand, but his hand got blasted off from a heavy bullet blow, making him shriek and fall over. Although cruel, you laughed at his awful attempt at playing Chad. But despite it all, you still care for the goof. Then there was Hank. Quiet, down to business, but has a rather sadistic side of him. You could say he comes off cold, but there are moments in time where he shows a glint of emotion, most of the time when his bloodlust meets a 'sugar high' to the point he can't control it anymore and lets loose his inner need of murder. You find it intimidating, but also fascinating to see how far he can go. Of course most of the time it leads to him getting brutally killed, but somehow a few days later he always ends up coming back... You remember the first time you saw him get destroyed, a large MAG Agent managed to grab him by the head and ripped him apart, and it made you shriek out to him before Sanford dragged you out the room. But it was days later, you saw him come back as if none of that happened, and you just assumed that's how it will always be when Hank dies. And to no one's surprise, you were right. At that point, you began to care less about him getting killed, sometimes you use his body as a shield whenever he's fallen. Makes you wonder if Hank is even human at all, and is linked to some weird spiritual thing. But those were thoughts to keep to yourself, otherwise it'd make the room awkward, especially to Hank.

Despite it all, these three had their own stories and personalities to show, and you love all three of them.

You dazed off from the conversation between Sanford and Deimos, until you heard Deimos say your name. You blinked awake, looking over. "Huh?" "Hey, the ride's over, we found a place to hang out." Deimos got up and bounced off the truck, reaching over to you. You smiled down at him and jumped right into his arms, leading him to twirl you around and settle you down, making you chuckle. Sanford followed along, stretching his arms out. "Seems like this place is a ghost town right now, wonder why." "We're why, Sanford." Hank retorted, stepping out the truck as he placed two guns in his pocket, in case of anything. "Grunts and agents won't fuck with us, now imagine them fucking with us drunk." He scoffed, walking passed the three of you. You placed your hands behind you back, shrugging. "Oh well, let's hope there's drinks at least." The four of you made way into the bar, a bartender was cleaning an empty glass only to spot the four of you, immediately freezing up in fear. "S-Shit! It's you guys again!" The bartender stood back, keeping a tight grip on the glass in hand, but Hank slammed a hand down on the bar table. "Give us drinks, old man. Or it'll be big time for you." Hank ordered, and without hesitation from the man behind the bar, he simply did as he was told, although shaking in fear from the fact all for of you were present. You eyed him carefully, but sat on a stool twirling around it. "I swear, it gets too boring too quick whenever we have days off." Deimos sighed, sitting on a stool next to you. "You're telling me, this place tends to get quiet quick whenever it doesn't get busy. You think those AAHW Agents are planning something big?" Sanford asked, and saw Hank lean against the table, shrugging. "Hope so. If they're just gonna throw more grunts at our way, I'll consider that a big fuck you from them." He huffed, rolling his shoulder. You leaned on the table. "I dunno, if they retreated this long, it's gotta be something good!" Sanford chuckled, nodding off the statement. "Maybe, maybe... hey, I got an idea, let's all drink 'til something happens!" "Like alcohol poisoning?" You raised a brow at Sanford, and Deimos chuckled under his breath. "Right, right, I'm just saying it's our night, so let's make it worth while." The bartender slid down a few shots for the crew, Sanford took one shot with a quick swig, and raised the empty glass. "Come on, now! Let's do it!" Deimos looked at you and Hank, and the three of you shrugged it off and raised a glass to join with Sanford.

What felt like hours that were only minutes, Hank, Sanford, Deimos, and yourself decided to be reckless. Sanford was a strong one, taking the shots like they were water, while Deimos was making his way to getting on Sanford's level, as for Hank, it was hard to tell if the alcohol hit him at all. But unfortunately, out of this bunch, you were the weakest to alcohol, your mind was buzzing on your eighth shot, seeing the three mercenaries become six, or is it seven? You couldn't tell. But you snapped away when you felt Deimos tugging you over for some kind of sluggish dance. "C'mon, Mercenary! Let's fuck around for a while, will ya?!" He chirped, and you made a groggy 'wait no' as he pulled you around all playful, laughing his ass off. Deep down, you can't wait to kick this guy's ass once things die low. But as of now, everyone was getting tipsy, and who knows what nonsense they'll pull. The only thing you're hoping is Hank won't pull out a gun and shoot around like an idiot. Deep down, you feel like he'll do that. "Deimos, let go of me you idiot!" You shouted over his goofy laughter, but he ended up slipping off and having you two fall on the ground. Hank shook his head, sighing at the sight. "You two shouldn't have alcohol." He snorted, looking over to Sanford who was growing just as buzzed as the other two. It felt like he had to babysit you three, but Hank was personally enjoying the sight of his mercenaries being themselves with no consequences. After a few hours, the rest of the group was smashed. You couldn't tell who you were clinging on, but they were struggling to keep you in their arms. "Shit, what time is it? Is there a place to even hide?" Deimos slurred, wiping alcohol off his mouth. It seems the bartender made his way out before they could even ask for more, which made Deimos growl in frustration. "Dammit! That asshole ditched us!" He raised a fist, but Sanford held his shoulder. "Relax, soldier. We're done for the night. I'm fucking wasted!" He snorted, keeping a firm hold onto you. You looked up at Sanford, noticing you were facing his bare chest, making your eyes widen and have your cheeks flare up.

“Uh...” You blinked.

“Yeah, Merc?” Sanford looked down, noticing your expression. “Shit- you good? You look sick.” He stumbled up and settled you on the table, but you just seem dazed at how nice his body is. Or maybe that’s the alcohol speaking. Unfocused, you grabbed Sanford and Deimos by the shoulders for support. “Maybe we should head back to the hideout we had last time, hardly anyone... goes there.” You paused and blinked at the floor, seeing your feet stumbling. Hank seemed to be the only one capable of keeping his composure, though not really attempting to give anyone a hand at all. “You know what, since I’m not the one who’s fucked up here, I’ll drive everyone back. I figured you three wouldn’t control yourselves, not like I’d be surprised about it.” Hank left out the door, leaving the rest of you to struggle along the way. It was like a difficult obstacle in stepping from point A to point B, Deimos and Sanford pulling you around for support as you all waddled your way to the truck. It was a blur the moment you slumped into the back of the truck, the only thing you could feel was your brain growing an immense fatigue as well as someone keeping your body up. The moment you passed out, you could only feel the nausea upcoming. 

When you woke up, you were welcomed to a face between the bare chest of Sanford, which made you immediately bounce off. But the moment you did, your head pulsed in a sense of pain and confusion, making you hiss under your breath, gripping your forehead. “Son of a bitch...” You muttered, but you saw that Sanford and Deimos were still asleep. Despite them being out cold, you really didn’t expect to have Sanford allowing you to get that handsy with him. Or maybe he wanted you to be comfortable... then again, those were comfortable. But the thoughts went away quick when you felt your head spin, stomach ready to hurl. You went over the edge of the truck, throwing up the excess of what was left in your stomach, the hangover lighting up slightly from the release. You looked over to the edge ahead, seeing a familiar building. It seems that Hank managed to drive everyone home. You really couldn’t help but be thankful that Hank was at least caring enough to drag everyone back. Where Hank was is nowhere to be found, but you can assume he must of went inside without you and the other two. You looked over at Sanford and Deimos, you’re sure they’ll be fine on their own, no one comes here nor interferes in this area. Sluggishly, you rolled out over the edge of the truck, hopping off with a simple thud to the ground. As you dusted off and made way inside, you saw Hank just hanging out on the couch, head held back with a cigarette in his mouth. 

You always found it adorable how he is in his most calm state, you sometimes wish he was like this more often. Though unfortunately, he’s the least likely to contain himself. You could tell he’s still awake, because the moment you shut the door, he spoke. “You’ve finally managed to get up. Head still hurtin’?” You turned over to him, seeing he’s still lazy about. “Yeah, but I’ll get over it. Sanford and Deimos haven’t gotten up yet, but hey, I’m here.” You walked over and sat on a seat beside him, patting his head which only made him grunt at your brave actions. “Remind me to tell you guys when you have one too many, you guys were drinking for hours.” Hank sighed, pulling the cigarette out his mouth, letting the smoke pass his nostrils. “Sorry, I didn’t even catch the time when we even started. Sanford shouldn’t of challenged us... then again, you won anyway.” 

“That’s because I didn’t overdo it. Sanford tends to have too much fun on his free time.” Hank shrugged, “Besides, if I joined in the nonsense no one would be able to take anyone back home. I ain’t risking to crash into a building drunk, won’t be too fun missing my shots.” You could only chuckle, watching him wave his hands about. He wasn’t expressive in face, but his hands were. You wondered if it was a good idea to kill time with him if you would just...

“Hey, Mercenary.” Hank spoke up. “Oh! Yeah?” You blinked back out of thought, looking at him. “I was wondering... couldn’t help but notice how it was kind of cute to see you try and cling onto me earlier when you were drunk.” Your eyes widened in embarrassment, looking away immediately. “G-God! Are you serious?! Fuck I’m sorry, Hank- I really didn’t mean to-” “It’s fine, dear.” Hank waved it off, you can tell there’s a smirk under there. “In fact I didn’t mind you getting handsy.” You puffed your cheeks at him, then giving him a hit in the head, making his shoot up immediately. “Ow- hey!” Hank huffed, rubbing his head. “Bad enough I got my head kicked in everywhere!” You crossed your arms, feeling your cheeks warm from the flustered reaction. “Yeah, yeah, whatever. I just don’t like it when you make a fool out of me, you always do that with everyone.” He looked at you, tilting his head lightly. “Now you know it’s not me trying to be a dick to you, Mercenary. I just do it because I thought maybe you wouldn’t mind me teasing you.” It took a moment, then you realized the way he worded it. You said he does it to everyone in the group, so does that mean he does it to ease everyone because he likes them? You blinked, looking at Hank. “Wait, you mean just me, or?”

“I mean everyone, you think I don’t bother Deimos and Sanford?” Hank continued for you, crossing his arms. It seems like dots are being made here, and you weren’t sure how to feel about it. Does he like the three of you the way you like them in return? It made you wonder. But you didn’t want to invade Hank’s personal stuff, you felt like he wasn’t aware of his own emotions. “Huh... Well, I guess I feel a little better about it now. Don’t know what you get out of it, though.” Hank looked over to you when you spoken that, and he looked back at the window, putting his cigarette out on his arm. “Honestly? Don’t know myself either, but it makes me feel a little better knowing it makes you guys get a kick out of my words, hahah.” 

You couldn’t help but smile at him, maybe he is feeling for certain things he wasn’t aware yet. And honestly, you want to help connect these dots for not only himself, but for everyone else. Maybe there is a spark that needs to be set alight, just unsure where to start. But as of now, you just want to enjoy the silence that remains in the room, closing your eyes as you smelled the remaining smoke in the room from Hank’s cigarette.

Maybe this little break for the group isn’t so bad.