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addledmongoose · 1 month ago

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Best of 2024 Good Omens Fanfiction

Welcome to my list of the best Good Omens fanfiction I’ve read in 2024! These are my favorites of all the novels, short stories, and series I’ve read this year, and they’re the ones I have or am most likely to read more than once. There’s so much amazing talent in the Good Omens fandom, and I will never be able to read every great story, but I’m happy to have found these fantastic works. (FYI, I added up the word counts of all the stories on this list, and it’s over three million!)

First of all, if you haven’t read the stories on my 2023 Best Of list, be sure to check out the amazing works there. There are a lot of older classics, like Or Be Nice, Slow Show, and Pray For Us, Icarus and some stories written after season two released, like Factory Setting and Married At First Sight.

Secondly, here is the entire list of every recommendation I’ve made in 2024. There are far more great stories than can fit in a single year-end list. I’ll be unpinning that list and pinning up a new one next year.

Last year, I was able to split my list up more evenly into canon adjacent/compliant and human AU. This year, I read a wider variety of stories, many of them quite long, and more series. I’m splitting the list into three categories: canon, human AU, and non-human AU. There's no order or ranking to the list; they were mostly just added as I read them.

There are also no WIPs here; all of the stories are complete. The series are also complete at the time of this list or are a series of standalone shorts that don't need to be read in order. My preferences lean toward funnier, lighter stories and are often heavy on plot. If you’re looking for dark stories with a lot of angst, you won’t find as many here as other blogs might recommend. It’s not that some of these don’t have dark, sad moments or moments of angst, but Aziraphale and Crowley must have a happy ending, and I prefer stories that don’t make me cry or cause a lot of stress.

If you like these stories, don’t forget to leave kudos and comments for the authors!

If you hit that "Keep reading" button, strap in! This is a very, very long post.

Canon

They’re still angel and demon. I’m counting Reverse Omens in this category.

The Seventh Prince of Hell (56K; Rated M) by @evilasiangenius

Reverse Omens. This is actually part of a series, but I’ve only read the first book, so I’m not listing it as a series. Aziraphale is the Seventh Prince of Hell. His animal aspect is the octopus. Crowley is an ordinary angel. Both are assigned to Earth. They have adventures!

Genesis 3:(-7)-5.5 -7 And they assembled all the Lords, the Princes of Hell into a congregation together sometime after the seventh day, but not on a day of rest because even the Dark Council has a day off. -6 When it came to pass that all grew weary of the powerful pointing presentations, Lord Beelzebub spake with a loud voice, saying unto them, One of uzz brotherzz muzzt go to Earth as Hell’s Represzentative and thwart the doings of Heaven; there izz no choice now that the Almighty has created humanzz. Who amongzt uzz shall take up the project? It comezz with a great deal of extra paperwork, much travel, and no overtime pay. And we shall not reimbursze anything and there shall be no per diem. [...] -3 And of the seven Princes of Hell, three stepped forward, and only three; not two nor five, which are the other prime numbers near three and definitely not one, which is not a prime at all but the unit. The first was the Second Prince, who is called Asmodeus and is a demon of lust. The second was the Seventh Prince, who is called Aziraphale and is a demon of collecting stuff. And the third was the Fourth Prince, who is not worth talking about because they only appear in this one scene and for no other reason than to have three characters. I think that Prince is the demon of executive dysfunction or erectile dysfunction or something like that. Maybe both.

***

Nice And Ominous: a reluctant eschatology of the Second Attempt (series) (117K; Rated T/E) by @e-rated-beardo

A three-part, post-s2 series with gorgeous art by the author. Part I is Crowley’s POV as he deals with the loss of his angel. Part II is from Aziraphale’s POV as he tries to stop the Second Coming and deal with the loss of his demon. Part III is the thrilling finale (and the happy ending). Expect a lot of angst but great characters and plot.

It was a shit day. All the days had been shit, and there had been rather a shitload of them so far. Tucked away in a disused corner of a car park in a retail park in Croydon, a lanky man cracked his eyes open and scowled out the side window of his car. There were raindrops hitting the glass and clouds massing towards the eastern horizon suggested a storm was on its way. He had slept uncomfortably across the front seats for a good amount of time (it didn’t much matter what exact amount), and despite the car being a vintage and exceptionally attractive specimen, nobody had paid it much mind—and the few people who had had the idea to come over and have a look at the ostensibly abandoned vehicle had all suddenly realised how much they actually needed to go buy a sofa or something at that Ikea over there, right about now, in fact. Untangling his various limbs, the man in the car—who wasn’t exactly a man, as such, but close enough for government work—reluctantly sat up, his boot brushing against one of the empty bottles on the floor. He had neglected to sober up before going to sleep.

***

Too Hot for Heavenly Handling (2.4K; Rated E) by @hollybennett123

Crowley says yes to returning to Heaven. The two enjoy three fornication-fueled weeks before they’re hauled before the Metatron and the other archangels for a disciplinary hearing. Rating-aside, there’s not any actual sex in this story. It’s implicit; not explicit.

I’ve read this story more times than I can count (ok, it’s seven). I nearly choked the first time I read it, because I was laughing so hard. Every sentence is a gem. The timing of the jokes is impeccable. There’s not a single bad line in this entire piece.

“No angel shall pretend to be of a lower status than their actual ranking,” Aziraphale reads aloud. “What does that have to do with — ohhh,” he says, wide-eyed, remembering their ongoing little roleplay. Crowley, an angel of the lowest ranking in their little game, seeking favour from an Archangel; offering to service him in secret so he might earn a series of Heavenly promotions. It had been jolly good fun, actually. “Misuse of Heavenly furniture,” the Metatron continues. “One count. Again, the actual number is unknown. Quite frankly, no one here is willing to research it further to gather any more evidence than the minimum required to bring you before this Council.” Looking back, Aziraphale’s desk has seen quite a bit of action in recent weeks. And the chair. The walls, too, if they count.

***

Aziraphale’s Diaries (series) (11K; Rated T) by @fellshish

A series of standalone fics written as Aziraphale’s diary entries. They don’t need to be read in any order. All of them are fantastic, but I probably laughed the hardest at “Adventures of a mystery shopper in the bookshop.” Aziraphale decides Crowley must be bored after the Nomageddon and in need of work and decides to “let” him take care of his bookshop while he’s away, but then he worries the demon might sell some of his books.

29 August 2018 I’ve informed Crowley I’ll be going away for about three weeks, to perform an exciting and complicated blessing abroad. In reality, I’ve booked the Ritz for myself, where I’ll be forced to act human and eat breakfasts, lunches and dinners. Anything to keep a close eye on Crowley! 30th August 2018 It’s my first day away. I decided to go by the bookshop in an “old and confused man disguise” so I could look through the window. I was just in time (a three hour window between lunch and afternoon tea at the Ritz) to see him read the letter I’d posted a few days ago so it would arrive just as I’d left. It was cleverly addressed “To the owner or the current guardian of this bookshop”. I used all my knowledge of humans, gathered via the cleverest of ways (a lot of reading), to write it.

***

A Special Place In Hell (50K; Rated T) by @hotcrosspigeon and @mirach

When Adam shifted reality and caused Satan to disappear, the nearest supernatural entity became the new King of Hell. As it so happened, a certain angel was standing just a little closer than his demon.

Aziraphale, while not Falling, becomes the new ruler of Hell and must navigate Hellish politics, find a role for the love of his life, and maybe bring some proper tea time to the infernal realm. I stumbled upon this story purely by accident one night, and it was a pure joy to read. It’s one of those stories I wish was a series, because I could read so much more in this world.

"Hello, Crowley, my dear fellow. I would like to discuss a certain issue with you. You see, I somehow got into a very peculiar predicament..." Aziraphale sighed in frustration, pacing in his bookshop. "No no no, that sounds like I got my hand stuck in the sweets vending machine again." He cleared his throat. "Hey Crowley, what's up? Better sit down because I have some news to tell you... And by some news I mean... errr..." The angel groaned. "Oh Heavens, there's just no proper way to say this. Ugh, come on, Aziraphale, buck up! You just need to get to the point, that's all. Say the things as they are. No going in circles around the matter. Nice and accurate, right. Just tell him..." He turned at the sound of the bookshop doorbell. "Hello Crowley! Nice weather, isn't it?" "Wha..?" Crowley raised an incredulous eyebrow over the top of his sunglasses, a drop of water running along the edge of his nose. His red hair was plastered to his forehead. He turned to look out the window, jerking a thumb at the onslaught of vicious hail and rain that pelted the glass and plinked against the pane. "Oh, ha ha , very funny. It's bloody bucketing down, angel! I legged it in here before I got clonked on the head with a hailstone the size of my fist." He stopped and frowned at the angel in concern. "Er... you all right? You're looking a bit peaky."

***

Flowers From Hell (42K; Rated T) by @entanglednow

Crowley creates a hybrid demon flower that turns out to be a little more than he intended. This was such a sweet, beautiful story of found family and love, and you’ll absolutely fall in love with Ivy and want to do everything to protect him.

There's a low, quiet rustle from the atrium, where Crowley keeps his finest plants. The beautiful and often terrified rows of them are always so tall and glossy, and fantastically well maintained. Aziraphale regrets that he hadn't taken more of an interest in Crowley's hobbies. It wouldn't have been too difficult, he imagines, to seek out rare specimens to offer the demon. When he's been given so many long sought after volumes, and unpublished manuscripts in turn. Perhaps he could encourage Crowley to open up more, with a few well thought out questions pertaining to his plants, and their various needs. He knows Crowley has been absorbed in a special project recently, he'll make a point to ask about it today. Aziraphale heads into the stretch of greenery, following the tap of feet on tiles, and the quiet swish of foliage. He catches a flash of red hair at the end of the room, behind a messy spray of deep green leaves, then another flash, of what might be the long, pale curve of a shoulder. "Crowley?" The whole room smells damp, thick with fresh soil and crushed plant matter, and it grows stronger the deeper in Aziraphale ventures. He's sure the room wasn't quite so large before, it's clearly been expanded since he visited last, a deep bed of soil is now packed at the back of the room. "Crowley." Aziraphale eases a large spray of damp leaves aside. "I hope I'm not too early, I was -" Crowley is standing by the far wall, carefully touching the valley in the middle of a large leaf with curious, repetitive motions. He's also quite naked. It's - it's unexpected to say the least.

***

Time Marches Forward (129K; Rated M) by @bellisima-writes

While Aziraphale is in Heaven trying to thwart the Second Coming, Crowley is trying to help a frightened 15-year-old Adam learn to deal with his powers. I consider this the definitive S3 (even having written a post-S2 myself), regardless of what the upcoming finale gives us. Every character is wonderfully fleshed out. The plot is intriguing. I read it as fast as humanly possible, barely stopping to do anything else.

Crowley felt the air in the Bentley shift slightly. “What are you doing here?” Crowley jumped in shock, hitting his head on the roof of the Bentley so hard his sunglasses fell off. Adam was suddenly in the passenger seat, studying him cautiously. “Hey! You can’t just come into my car, uninvited,” Crowley hissed, grabbing his glasses and placing them back on his face. He realized he was still slouching, making Adam appear much bigger than he was. He sat up straight and crossed his arms in an attempt to look more intimidating and less drunk. He wondered if it was wise to try and glower at the Antichrist. “He can, actually,” Pepper said from the back seat. Crowley turned and snarled as he noted the three other teenagers in his car. Wensleydale and Brian sat beside her. “He can do anything.” “Yeah well, that may be so but that doesn’t make it right. Just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you should,” he looked Adam directly in the eyes as he said this, assuming no one else around him would ever be so blunt. “What are you doing lurking around my house?” Adam asked again plainly. Crowley’s glowering was not working. “Ngk. I didn’t come to see you, if that’s what you're asking. I’m as shocked as you are to find myself here. I was asleep for a few days. The bloody car did it; blame it for the lurking”

***

The Last Angel (162K; Rated E) by @bellisima-writes

Crowley's been Hell's Grand Inquisitor for millennia now. Ever since the Apocalypse, he's managed to carve out a relatively cushy life for himself. Hell won the War, Angels were essentially eradicated and all human souls were Satan's. Everything was fine. Until one day he hears a rumor that the Last Angel in the universe was finally captured. Until Beelzebub is suddenly ordering him to get information from said Angel, information that's critical for Hell's survival. Until the moment he first locks eyes with the last Angel, and everything he's ever known starts to crumble around him.

I can’t come up with a better description than the summary. Much like the author’s previous work, Time Marches Forward, this is plot-heavy, exciting, action-packed, and gorgeous. The characters are detailed and realistic. The plot sings. And you won’t see the surprise until it’s already there.

“What kinds of rumors?” he asked, shifting in his seat to properly face Eric. Words were one thing, but body language was another. As Grand Inquisitor, Crowley learned early on to weigh both when evaluating information shared by a source whose reliability was questionable. Eric was a nice kid, sure. But their reliability would definitely be categorized as questionable . Eric’s mood shifted as they glanced around the corridor. Crowley hadn’t realized how quiet the cells had gotten. The bloody humans were eavesdropping again. He dug deep and pulled up a hiss so loud and laced with demonic power that it rattled every cell door in the entire block. Eric motioned with their hand for Crowley to follow them into a corner and out of earshot of everyone else. As Crowley pulled himself up and started walking he sent searing looks down each row of cells around him. They were all going to have a talk about this later. “What?” he asked when he got close enough to Eric. Still eyeing the cells behind them, Eric leaned in closer and whispered, “Hastur finally found him."

Crowley shook his head. Eric’s shiftiness was starting to annoy him. “Found who?” “The one who killed Ligur. Crowley, Hastur’s finally captured the last Angel.”

***

Kidnapping A Supreme Archangel For Fun And Profit (series) (31K; Rated T) by @waitingtobebroken

Mostly outsider POV. Four short stories told mostly from the points of view of Agiel, the Supreme Archangel’s assistant, and Kric (Eric with a K), the Grand Duke’s assistant as they try to figure out why the Supreme Archangel is so unworried about all the times he’s getting himself kidnapped by the Grand Duke. In the meantime, the two assistants find that maybe they have more in common than they would have expected, being hereditary enemies and all.

Being Lord Beelzebub's demonic assistant had been easier than overseeing the third circle of Hell. Just stay out of the way, don't make eye contact, not that Kric could, having been blessed with a distinct lack of eyes, and do not talk to the Prince of Hell, unless it was a 'Yes, Your Highness' or... No, that was pretty much it. You did not go around saying "No" to Lord Beelzebub. And of course, just as they had finally grown comfortable in their position, had even found the perfect time to ask for an assistant of their own... There had been a change in leadership. And Kric had found themself serving Crowley. The Original Tempter, the Snake of Eden, the Earth Walker. Kric was not impressed. Flash bastard. And suddenly, they were expected to be in the throne room at all times. To answer when addressed. Proper, actual answer. None of that automatic 'Yes, your Highness' they were so used to. The first time His Rottenness had held up two sashes, before the monthly meeting between Heaven and Hell and had asked which one made his scales look more iridescent and Kric had answered in the only way they knew how... Well, let's just say that hadn't gone well. They had been sent to something called Fashion Week. To better their understanding of clothes and colour theory, something they could sense had been invented by a fellow demon. Lord Crowley, most probably, judging by the way His Wickedness had grinned when he had told them that.

*****

Human AU

Fully human characters. No supernatural/magical elements.

Waking Up Slow (88K; Rated E) by @themoonmothwrites

After both being exposed to covid, strangers Crowley and Aziraphale wait out their isolation together (there’s only one bed!) at a cottage by the sea. This is complete cosycore fluff with just a touch of angst (and a happy ending) near the end. This gorgeous story has stuck with me for so long. If you want something that’s just plain pleasurable to read, this is it.

“Lovely view.” The voice was low, with the slightest hint of gravel, and right next to Aziraphale’s ear. He made an undignified noise and spun round in fright. “Where the devil did you-?” he started, high-voiced, before his foot caught on a stone and he lost his balance. The stranger was standing so close that Aziraphale toppled right into him, and the pair of them went down together in a tangle of knees and a solid thunk to the forehead. “Ow,” the man said, squinting up at Aziraphale, gaze unfocused, before his eyes fell closed. “Oh no!” Aziraphale breathed. “Oh dear. What do I-?” He’d left his blasted phone at the cottage, now of all times when he actually needed it! With an unconscious man lying before him! And it was all Aziraphale’s doing! “I can-- I can-- I know what to do!” he told himself, attempting belatedly not to panic. The best thing to do was not to think too hard. Tipping up the stranger’s chin, Aziraphale pinched his nose and lowered his face until his mouth closed over the other man’s.

***

The Prince’s Consort (142K; Rated E) by @ineffable-toreshi

Aziraphale is the crown prince of a fictional nation. Crowley is a Lily, trained in one of Lucien’s brothels and kept a virgin for the eventual sale to a wealthy master. Against the brothel owner’s wishes, Crowley is purchased by the prince’s adviser, Gabriel, as a companion for Prince Aziraphale. Aziraphale didn’t want a purchased mate, however, and decides to court his new consort the old-fashioned way.

The description makes this sound like a darker story than it is; it’s actually a really sweet story with only one bad guy (and it’s not Gabriel).

I wrote a much longer review here if you’d like more details.

“I...I was just wondering, my Lord,” Anthony said, nervously nibbling on his lip and twisting his fingers in his lap. “Why did you choose me ?” Gabriel cocked his head to the side. He leaned back, reclining with his arms thrown up over the edges of the bench, and seemed to think about the question. By the time he finally opened his mouth to answer, Anthony was practically vibrating with curiosity. “There were a few factors,” he explained thoughtfully. “I’ll admit that your appearance was the first and foremost. I prefer women, myself, but I know beauty in a man when I see it. And I’ve seen the types who’ve caught the prince’s eye over the years. I’m quite confident that he will find you more than pleasing, from an aesthetic standpoint.”

***

Keep Digging (7K; Rated T) by Appleseeds

After panicking and losing his nerve trying to ask out Aziraphale, the co-worker Crowley has an enormous crush on, he tells a little white lie that ends up completely spiralling out of control since he can't seem to stop digging himself into a deeper and deeper hole. Now he's obtained plans to help him break into a school, inadvertently funded the purchase of explosives, and, knowing his luck, the fake blood will end up permanently staining the tiles. Who knows though, maybe in the end, it'll all turn out to be worth it.

Another one of those stories that are so funny tears stream down my face every time. Even going back through it to find an excerpt had me choking down laughter.

“I actually used to be a music tutor. That was one of the little jokes I liked to tell.” Aziraphale giggled again. Nhhhhh. “Wish you could tutor me…” Crowley muttered under his breath. “Oh! Are you wanting to learn to play a musical instrument?” Aziraphale asked brightly. Crowley’s eyes widened. He wasn’t supposed to hear that. Of course, he wouldn’t have heard it if Crowley had just kept his big mouth shut. “Um. Yeah.” “Wonderful! Which one?” FUCK. How the hell was Crowley supposed to answer that? Whatever he said, he might end up having to get one of said instrument, and he didn’t know much, but he knew musical instruments could be incredibly expensive. There must be something that would be cheap enough to procure if needs be, right? And with that thought, Crowley responded. “The triangle.” Oh Jesus Christ.

***

Temple of the Muses (241K; Rated E) by @ajconstantine

It’s the start of the Season in 1841 Victorian England. Mr Anthony Crowley has left a life of working at a luxurious high end bordello in Paris behind him and is now a courtesan intent on climbing the social ladder in London to increase his status and social connections. After unexpectedly inheriting the title of the Earl of Eastgate, Aziraphale finds himself trying to navigate the complicated world of the aristocracy. Duke Gabriel purchases a month-long contract with Mr Crowley for Lord Fell as a surprise gift to Aziraphale’s astonishment and dismay. He declines to take full advantage of Crowley’s charms but agrees to an arrangement of pretending to be Crowley’s paramour in exchange for lessons on the etiquette and expectations of Society. It’s a practical arrangement, nothing more. Certainly no feelings will be involved...

One of the best, most well-researched stories I’ve read. The historical elements are fascinating, and the world-building is top notch. Set in an alternate 1841 where there’s no stigma on same sex relationships, but same sex marriage is still not allowed. The story alternates between the present time, with Aziraphale and Crowley navigating their growing relationship, and Crowley’s time being trained at one of the most elite bordellos of Paris.

Crowley has a lot of autonomy in this story. He actively chose to become a sex worker. Once he leaves the bordello and becomes a courtesan, he can refuse to sign with a client. And while there are consequences for breaking a contract, a courtesan can walk away from a troublesome client.

“Exactly what position do you think I was hired for?” Crowley interrupted, pulling the shoulder of his robe back up. The Earl looked at him as if he’d asked a ridiculous question. “Valet, of course.” Crowley barked out a disbelieving laugh. “Duke Haven didn’t tell you about me?” The Earl pursed his lips, tilting his head in puzzlement. “Not you precisely. I was at his house last week, and he chastised me when I mentioned that I didn’t have a valet, insisting I needed one even though…” His eyes widened. “Oh no. What… what did you think you were being hired for?” Struck by the absurdity of it all, Crowley fought the strong urge to laugh outright. Instead, he gave the Earl a roguish grin and bowed with a flourish. “Mr Anthony Crowley, at your service, sir. Duke Haven procured a contract for me to be your... courtesan.” Lord Fell's mouth dropped open as he gaped at him in apparent shock. “You— I—” He floundered, at a loss for words as he looked away from Crowley. His eyes landed on the bed. To Crowley’s growing amusement, the Early actually blushed, red staining his cheeks as he swiftly averted his gaze.

***

#RAINBOWROAD (series) (407K; Rated T/E) by @nieded

If you haven’t heard of this one yet, you’re one of today’s lucky 10,000. This is one of the best, most well-written human AUs that anyone has produced for Good Omens (or really, of any romance). It’s a three-book, three-short series set in the world of Formula 1 racing. You heard that right. You don’t need to know anything about F1 racing. You don’t even need to like F1 racing. You just need to want to read one of the best romances ever written to enjoy this series.

Ezira Phale is a rookie F1 driver. AJ Crowley is an F1 veteran and an idol of the 25-year-old racer. Everything changes when Ezira meets and falls in love with Crowley, and the older driver (by about 10 years; there’s not a massive age difference here) seems to return his feelings. I wrote a very long review of the series here, so I won’t go into a ton of detail again except to say, if you love human AU, this should be on your list. The author adds notes at the end of the chapters explaining some of the more technical aspects of the sport, or talking about some of the real racers, and it’s fascinating.

Ezira makes his escape from the after-party after stealing a handful of fig tartlets from the hors d’oeuvres table. He ducks out the service exit before looping back to the front of the hotel. God, he wants to sleep off his tipsiness. It’s significantly cooler at night, and he wraps his arms around his shoulders before slipping inside, making a dash for the elevator. Punching his floor number, he leans against the wall and closes his eyes, waiting to be taken to his floor. Then the elevator jerks as someone jabs their hand between the sliding doors, forcing it back open. Ezira lifts his head and glares at the newcomer before his eyes widen, flushing when he recognizes the red hair and black Renault polo. AJ Crowley throws himself into the opposite corner of the elevator and pulls the brim of his hat down. He turns to look at Ezira from under his cap. "Tough luck out there today, huh?" he asks. Ezira frowns and blinks. And because he’s a little drunk and high on adrenaline, he says, "Didn’t you place seventh? I thought that was fucking brilliant." This earns him a snort, and then a bit of stifled laughter. "You can’t say fuck." "You say fuck in almost every interview you do." Not that Ezira has watched every single post-debrief involving AJ Crowley. This makes Crowley laugh harder, and he wipes at his eyes. "You just look like you should be in a painting or something. You’re like a Hummel." Flabbergasted, Ezira stares. His cheeks grow hot when he realizes AJ Crowley is taking the piss. "I don’t even know what that means." Crowley wipes his eye with the back of his hand and then presses his lips together in a feeble attempt to hold back another fit of laughter. "I’m sorry. I’m just very, very drunk, and was not expecting you to say ‘fuck.’ You look like those cherubs from Italy."

***

Lunacy (57K; Rated E) by @snae-b

@snae-b writes some of the best sci-fi GO stories you’ll ever read. This is hardly the only great story of theirs I’ve recommended; it just happens to be my personal favorite. Crowley is the crew chief of a mining operation on one of Pluto’s tiny moons. Aziraphale is a geologist there to study the structural integrity of the moon. But something seems to be alive, something that shouldn’t be there. This is pure psychological horror, the kind of story where you’re never quite sure what’s real and what’s a hallucination. You’ll find definitely NSFW artwork throughout, so take note not to read it around people you wouldn’t want seeing porn on your screen.

Crowley zones out as they continue their conversation. Things had been weird in the mine today. For the past month really. Tech malfunctioning. Batteries draining when they should have been able to hold a charge for days. Half the lights were on the fritz. As if it weren't dark enough in there already. He'd had to trek nearly a mile into Sheol with only the lights on his helmet to repair them. And his crew had their hands full with extraction, so he’d had to do it alone. The darkness really starts to play tricks on you in there. He spent as much time looking over his shoulder as he did working on the lights. Kept thinking that he was seeing something. Something hiding in the shadows. Something that lived in his peripheral vision. As he tugs a beanie on over his head there’s a light rapping on the wall and everyone glances up to the figure in the doorway. “Excuse me, Mr. Crowley. If you have time in your schedule, I really need to discuss the most recent surface scans with you. Could you come by my quarters before dinner?” Crowley sighs as he snaps on his mag boots. “Yeah. Sure thing doc. I’ll be by in thirty.” The scientist only nods before he disappears down the hall. Dr. Aziraphale Fell. He doesn’t wear the standard issue jumpsuits. He wears thick sweaters and wool trousers that look ridiculous with his mag boots. And when he isn’t wearing them, he can hardly get around. Bumps into everything and everyone. He’s never been off planet before and it shows.

***

Miracles on Ice (131K; Rated E) by @henriettarhippo

It’s the “Blades of Glory” AU you never knew you wanted. Crowley and Aziraphale are men’s figure skaters who get banned from the sport after a fight on the podium. Years later, Aziraphale’s coach, Gabriel, suggests the two of them team up to compete in the Olympic’s pairs event. Only problem is, the two skaters hate each other.

This is very much an enemies-to-lovers story, and Gabriel as their coach and sponsor is the perfect combination of asshole and good guy. He genuinely does care for his two skaters, and he’s generous with his money, but he also has that rich guy attitude of being used to getting what he wants, and he’s not afraid to tell them to stop being dumbasses either.

“Hey angel, was that your routine? Because it looked to me like a lot of swanning about on the ice with a few pirouettes thrown in.” The mocking drawl came from the figure making his way towards Aziraphale on a pair of sharp blades. Clad in skintight black velvet trousers and a black turtleneck adorned with glittering red crystals—to match the striking red curls that stopped at his shoulders—Aziraphale’s skating rival Crowley beamed down at him with a malicious grin. “Also, you’re a bit late. They handed out the women’s medals earlier today.” He pulled down the dark shades he always wore to give Aziraphale a wink. Aziraphale bristled and sat up straighter. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. That was textbook precision, and I think you’ll find it was the same scores I beat you with last year in Oslo.” “The hotel had a free bar I don’t even remember Oslo,” Crowley said dismissively as he approached the entrance to the rink. He turned back and gave Aziraphale a grin. “But I do remember Boston, and that victory was almost as sweet as the look on your face when you botched that triple loop.” Crowley let out a laugh at the scandalised look Aziraphale gave him. The loudspeakers started up with the first booming notes of a rock song and Crowley hopped up onto the ice and skated away from him before Aziraphale had the chance to reply.

***

Friends Don't (33K; Rated E) by @missunderstoodlyrics

Human AU. Another fantastic enemies-to-lovers by MissUnderstoodLyrics. This is the newest story on this list.

Aziraphale and Crowley are rival advice columnists whose companies are merged. The CEO, Gabriel, tells them they now have to do a joint video podcast together. The snark and bickerflirting are top notch, and this story kept a smile on my face. They have to keep their romance a secret, because the whole schtick of their podcast is their very public rivalry, but it gets harder and harder the closer they become.

Aziraphale attempted to drown his mirth in his wine glass, which was precisely when Crowley decided to position his mouth millimetres from the angel’s ear. “Blair. Have you met him? Worst. Comb-over. Since. Thatcher,” he whispered and then found himself helpfully patting Aziraphale's back as the man choked and spluttered, his cherubic face turning a delightful shade of pink. “Absolute fiend,” Aziraphale managed once he’d caught his breath, but the corners of his mouth were twitching traitorously. Crowley clocked Michaela out of the corner of his eye; she was leaning forward to shush them. Aziraphale escaped her wrath by standing and marching to the stage, his back straight and shoulders squared. He planted himself solidly in front of the microphone and proceeded to destroy what was left of Crowley’s sanity. “I once met a man-shaped snake,” he stated, his gaze firmly locked on Crowley. “Whose snark was taxing to take With swagger and pose He turned up his nose But his wisdom was rather half-baked.”

*****

Non-Human AU

One or both of them are non-human, or have some sort of supernatural abilities (like magic) but aren’t angel or demon. I’m including omegaverse in this category.

Mark of the Serpent (150K; Rated E) by @naromoreau and @summerofspock

Prince Aziraphale is about to be crowned King of Angelhaven when he's taken captive by pirates. When he's sold as a pleasure slave to King Crowley, ruler of the nation readying for war with his, he is forced to keep his identity a secret as he tries to find a way home and keep peace. But not everything at King Crowley's court is as it seems and Aziraphale will have to face machinations of a Royal Court that are far more complex than he had thought. A Captive Prince AU with an omegaverse twist.

The first omegaverse story I genuinely liked, even though Crowley is pretty awful toward Aziraphale at first. Since then I’ve come to enjoy more of them, but this is the one that got me into the genre. This is another one I’ve written a much longer review about here including an explanation for the “extremely dubious consent” tag.

"What about this one?" the omega king asked, eyes fixed on his face, a strange curl to his mouth. "He's an Angel," Hastur sneered. "Pretty, isn't he? We were trying to pick a variety for your majesty to choose from since you didn’t deign to accompany us, but we didn’t find out his origin until after we brought him. He probably doesn't even speak the language." The words manifested in Aziraphale’s mind, and he immediately saw the genius in them. If he didn't speak the language, he could hardly be appealing as a consort to the king. He would be dismissed, sent back to Tracy's, and given time to heal before making his escape. "An Angel?" the king repeated, something passing over his face that Aziraphale didn't like. "What's your name?" "I’m sorry," Aziraphale stammered in Angelic, sticking to his hastily made plan. "I don’t...I don’t know what you're saying." King Crowley smiled and said, in perfect Angelic, "I asked what your name was." "Oh, um, I- you can call me whatever you wish," Aziraphale said, not wanting to risk even a part of his name. The king laughed. "I'm choosing the Angel. Send him to my quarters." "But your majesty-" The omega king turned on Ligur. "You wanted me to choose a pleasure beta and I did. It's done. Were there any other highly important council matters or can I get back to my day?"

***

Saltwater on Skin (186K; Rated E) by @candyqueenblog

Another one with a longer review here. Ezra Fell is an award-winning novelist celebrating the millionth sale of his newest books with his friends and baby brother, Gabriel, on a rented yacht. He falls overboard and washes ashore on an uncharted island, and while awaiting rescue, he gets the strange feeling he’s not alone.

This is a low angst love story between the human and the naga who rescues him, and you’ll fall in love with the island and Crowley’s four sisters. Gabriel is a peach here, much younger than Ezra and very much the caring baby brother.

And if you’d prefer an Ineffable Wives version of the story, you can find that here. I haven’t read it, but I assume it’s equally good.

Ezra couldn’t stifle the flood of tears as he threw his arms over his head with a scream. Then a pair of rough, but blessedly human hands, covered his wrists. “You… scared?” The stranger’s voice was gravelly, most likely from disuse, but to Ezra it sounded more beautiful than all the angelic choirs. He sobbed in relief. “Oh thank heavens! I thought for sure I was going to-” His words sputtered and died when he opened his eyes to look at his rescuer. It was a man… ...from the waist up. The man’s bare torso was thin, but well defined with long arms lean with muscle. His face was all angles framed by a shock of red hair that curled down his back. His eyes were captivating. They were human enough, save for the iris being the color of spun gold and sliced right down the middle by a slit-shaped pupil. That was about where the human similarities ended. From the waist down the man’s skin melded into a massive snake tail that was wider than Ezra’s entire body and covered in black scales with a red underbelly that matched his hair.

***

FAETED (series) (251K; Rated G/T) by @ineffably-good

The only story in this category that’s not rated E. A three-book, one-short series where Ezra, an English teacher at a public school accidentally ends up in the Fae realms and in the hands of the Unseelie king, Crowley. The world-building is fantastic, and the books use some of the side characters so well, especially Hastur and Ligur, two of Crowley’s most trusted advisers. Crowley is good to Ezra, but he’s spent a thousand years ruling over the chaotic and dangerous unseelie fae, and he doesn’t always know how to handle being in love with a human. And Ezra doesn’t understand the difficult and often prickly politics of the fae, so the two have a lot of misunderstandings to work through. It leads to several fights, but they are usually resolved within the chapter.

The stories are heavy on plot, mostly around the world of the fae, which is one of the things I love most about this series. I could easily read dozens of books set in this world.

Lord Crowley watched as Ezra emerged from the coach, curious to see how this strange mortal would react to his first sight of the Dark Court. Would he blanch in terror? Would he be curious? He didn’t know or understand the creature across from him, but he knew one thing— his reactions, to date, were not what the Prince expected. This was oddly refreshing. It had been so, so long since anyone had managed to surprise him. He watched as Ezra emerged, his fluffy golden hair sticking out in all directions above the dark gray travel cloak he’d donned. He smiled faintly and with studious politeness at the horrifying gremlin who helped him down the steps, brushed the nonexistent dust off himself, and took in his surroundings. Crowley was gratified to see his eyes widen as he looked around. They were standing in the center of an immense cavern, almost as if a mountain had been hollowed out inside by an immense blast. The rock walls climbed up above them and came together at an unmeasurable distance overhead and were dotted everywhere one looked with cavernous openings, some of which flickered with the light from a fire further inside. Creatures here and there, too murky to make out fully, hovered near the openings of some of them, peering down at the return of their Prince with eyes he could not read. Further ahead, the floor cracked into a massive chasm which ranged across the rest of the cavern and was crossed here and there by rickety-looking bridges. It was lit from below by the light of flames and the scent of sulfur. Stalagmites rose from the floor at irregular intervals, some of them paired with stalactites dropping from the ceiling like large, rocky icicles. Their surfaces glittered here and there with what looked like mica or gems. Crowley watched as Ezra took all of this in at a glance. “Thoughts?” said Lord Crowley, sidling up to him. Ezra turned astonished eyes the color of blue sky to him. “It’s beautiful! I’ve never seen anything like this.” Crowley searched his face for mockery or insincerity but found only earnestness. The Prince felt a tingle of pleasure at this, at least for a moment, until he ruthlessly slammed that feeling down inside himself and returned to his usual sardonic detachment. He hadn’t brought the human here to be his friend.

***

If He’s Your Cleric, Why Is He Putting Me In His Bag of Holding? (300K; Rated E) by @noodlefrog-omens

I read this twice in a row. Literally. I stopped it and almost immediately started it again. I played D&D 3.5 for many years, and I absolutely loved seeing a D&D adventure played out in the GO universe. Aziraphale is the cleric of an adventuring party that stupidly decides to abandon him in the dungeon (you don’t abandon your healer!). Crowley is a very hungry mimic who ends up nearly dying in Aziraphale’s bag of holding before the cleric rescues him. (Look, if you’re going to look like a fancy book, don’t be surprised when the man tries to steal you).

Aziraphale still needs to find his adventuring party again, and the mimic decides to travel along with him. Along the way they find kobolds, a doppelganger, traps, and the obligate dungeon maze, all the while getting to know each other. Aziraphale recognizes his feelings toward the mimic fairly early on, but it takes Crowley longer to even understand what his feelings even mean.

The porn doesn’t start until chapter 33 (of 40), and only covers maybe three of the remaining eight chapters. You can read the entire adventure and stop once they leave the dungeon if you don’t want any monsterfuckery, or you could skim past the smut to the ending. I don’t know if the author has any plans for sequels, but if he does, I’ll be right there ready.

In that moment, Crowley knew that he had found the right bait to lure this human right to his doom. He waited as patiently as he could while nearly vibrating himself into a puddle, watching as Aziraphale puttered around the room cooing over all the books and scrolls in the room as though they were living creatures. “Just you wait,” Crowley thought to himself, inordinately pleased to have figured out what made this stubborn human tick. “One of them will be.” “There must be centuries’ worth of knowledge collected in just this one chamber,” Aziraphale said in a reverent whisper. Finally, finally he started touching things in this dungeon. He even took his heavy leather gloves off, tucking them into his belt before running a fingertip along the spines of the books chained to the shelves. Crowley watched him take one right off the shelf and thumb through a few of the pages. “We must have walked right by this room. I don’t know why Sandalphon told me there wasn’t anything behind this door. He must not have looked closely enough.” Aziraphale turned his back to the shelves to glance back at the door, and Crowley took his chance to crawl up the side of the bookshelf and arrange himself in front of the chained tomes in pride of place. It wasn’t difficult to change himself into the shape of a book, but this was always about the details. It was an art form. Which books, exactly, had Aziraphale been drawn to? Old ones with leather covers, mostly. Ones with bits of fiddly decoration on the spine. Ones with a bit of mystery. Aziraphale was a cleric, so he was probably interested in talking to the Gods and shite like that, or at least understanding them. That was an angle Crowley could work with. He gave his skin a supple leather texture, inky black and vaguely shimmery in a way he knew would catch the flickering light being thrown out by that sword. Gold edging and lettering crept across his cover and spine, promising divine secrets and cosmic mysteries to anyone who would just reach out and touch. He couldn’t see himself, but Crowley knew that he was a very sexy book right now. Aziraphale would have to be mad not to notice him.

***

Crowley And The Chocolate Factory (55K; Rated E) by @entanglednow

Crowley has to step up for his nephew Adam when he wins a ticket to tour the famous chocolate factories, run by the reclusive and deeply strange Zira Zonka. It doesn't take Crowley long to decide that he wants nothing to do with the man, who's clearly hiding dark and mysterious secrets.

Do you like your Crowley grumpy and cynical? Do you like your Aziraphale weird? Did you think the one thing missing from Charlie and The Chocolate Factory was sex between Wonka and one of the parents in a vintage Bentley? Then this is the story for you!

Crowley doesn’t know what to make of the definitely strange Zira Zonka, but he finds himself drawn to the man nonetheless. The story is set in modern times, but if you know the original (at least the movie version; I can’t speak for the books), you have a general idea of what’s going to happen to the children.

Zonka releases the arms of his partners for long enough to jerk his cane towards the sky, which erupts in a shower of flower petals and candy - a large proportion of which fall on the immediately excited crowd. Crowley's fairly certain he gets hit on the head by a soft fudge. God, this is humiliating. Zonka dances right and then left while the audience cheers in appreciation. He does another circle, separates from the row to do some unimpressive spins while trying - and failing - to find a good rhyme for liquorice. "My candy emporium has so much in store. Just step right up and walk through the door!" Zonka's gold and white cane snaps up into the air again, this time leaving a burst of light and his name written across the sky in sparkling gold calligraphy. It seems to be a dramatic ending, Crowley certainly hopes it's a dramatic ending. "Half of those lines were a stretch," he complains, but quietly and mostly to himself, because the audience seems to have found the whole thing captivating, Adam included. "And there's only five kids, not six, he can't even count." The Erik's all unlink arms, to thunderous applause from the crowd behind him, and Zonka gives the widest grin Crowley has ever seen. His hands flung on his hips, like the world's most enthusiastic children's entertainer. Crowley half expects him to ask who wants to see a magic trick. "How has this man possibly managed to stay out of the limelight for twenty years?" he wonders. "Or twenty minutes."

***

Villainous (217K; Rated E) by @ineffablepenguin

Once Upon A Time… There was a red-haired sorcerer who lived alone in a high tower, and a blond prince who lived in a palace full of people. And they were both of them desperately lonely. The Kingdoms of Empyrion and the Sorcerers of Apollyon have hated each other for hundreds of years, ever since the Great War. They do not interact, other than to occasionally try to kill one another. And they certainly do not make friends. Crow is an exhausted sorcerer who just wants everyone to leave him the hell alone: for the Sorcerer’s Council to stop harassing him to live up to his potential, and for wannabe Empyrion Heroes to stop attacking his tower to try and kill him. Until one day when he meets Prince Azra of the High Fells, who doesn’t behave anything like he’s supposed to…

This is one of those stories a lot of people recommend for good reason. It’s a fantastic fairy tale full of love and romance between two people who seem destined for one another. The writing is gorgeous, the world-building is fantastic, and there’s really great artwork scattered throughout. Some of the artwork is fairly suggestive, and all of it is stunning.

Crow slowed to a stop, and his gaze flickered bemusedly over him. The man was…not tall. Or remotely intimidating. He stood a couple inches shorter than him, even with the thick boots. Wide eyes shone resolutely grey-blue, the precise shade of his doublet, under a tumble of feathery white-blond curls cut a bit too short to be fashionable. And... his stubbornly-set jaw was rather less chiseled than Crow was used to seeing. No conveniently placed scars, no gritty dents or smudges on that immaculate armour. Heroes usually had cheekbones that could cut glass, but this one’s were rounded, and slightly rosy to boot. Cherubic was the word that came immediately to mind, and Crow nearly snorted out loud. He looked to be roughly Crow's own age, and was staring determinedly, if anxiously at him from behind that enormous broadsword. There was a long, tense silence as Crow and the armoured man sized each other up. The Hero spoke first. “Now see here, villain, I don’t want to have to kill you, so just turn about and head right back where you came from.” His voice was precise and educated, nearly fussy, and while self-assured was lacking in the usual bravado. Crow blinked, taken aback, and the flames in his hand faltered. “You don’t want to kill me?” “Well…no, not particularly.” The confidence wavered for an instant, then solidified. “Which is not to say that I won’t! Rest assured I will if you cause trouble!”

***

The Crawly Chronicles (series) (179K; Rated T/M/E) by @theladydrgn and @sylwritesstuff

When Aziraphale Fell, reporter for The Daily Messenger, is tasked with a simple story on smuggling, he isn't expecting to find out that Lightbringer, Inc. has been experimenting on something that could be an animal, an oil slick, or something else entirely. He especially isn't expecting that being to come home with him and change his entire life.

I’m a fan of the Tom Hardy Venom movies, which made this two-book, two-short series perfect for me. The books follow the plot of the first two movies, though book 2 also starts with the sexual relationship between the two characters.

My favorite parts of the story are of the two learning to live together while sharing a body, and Aziraphale trying to figure out how to handle having feelings for a creature he’s permanently attached to who is so completely alien (literally) that he’s not even sure that romantic and sexual love are even an option.

The food the human was making already smelled good enough to eat to them, and they did not want to wait twenty minutes. This time their control of the human's hand was less subtle as they dipped fingers into the leftover batter and brought a generous scoop of the chocolate mix to their mouth. “Nasty human's is what they were.” Aziraphale froze or at least tried to. His mouth seemed to have other ideas, cleaning the mixture from his fingers. “What- Who said that?” he demanded messily, looking around. “I did.” Aziraphale took several steps back, grasping for the cane he'd left leaning against the counter. The voice sounded as if it were everywhere around him or- or in his own mind somehow. “That's hardly reassuring. Who are you? How did you get into my home?” “Got in the same way you did, human.” They grabbed the bowl of chocolate mixture before the human stumbled too far from it, fingers scraping the last dregs of it to not waste a single bit. The cane fell to the floor. Aziraphale tried stopping himself, but he couldn't seem to make his hands do what he wanted them to do. “Stop! How-” What in the world was happening and how did he stop it? “No. I'm hungry.” “That doesn't make any sense! Stop!” he demanded, struggling to keep his chocolate covered fingers away from his own mouth. “Fine.” They still felt so weak that fighting this human for control was a struggle and a challenge that they did not want to have. It was just so much easier to slip out between their cells and wrap a long tongue around their fingers instead.

***

And finally, if you made it all the way to the end, thank you!

I have three Good Omens novels of my own I hope you’ll check out, a post-S2 with an upcoming sequel; a “they never met”/fake marriage adventure; and a reverse omens (a WIP as of 27 Dec, 2024; chapters are released on Fridays, and it should be completely posted around mid-February 2025).

#good omens #good omens fanfiction #best of 2024

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u3pxx · 1 year ago

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💛🕊️ Five times Aziraphale gave Crowley a gift plus one time Crowley gave a gift in return.

DID YOU KNOW THAT @contritecactite, once again, wrote a VERY GOOD fic about my bad omens spouses??? and it's so wonderfully GOOD???!?!?!!

anywhooo, a very big special thanks again to elle for writing this! it's been just a real treat talking to them and the klapollomb gomens s2 support group about bad omens 🥺 i'm really, really thankful that y'all decided to indulge me and my freakingg swap au wheezes <33

i'm gonna cut myself off here and ramble more under keep reading :0]

like these drawings? they're prints, here! | like what i do? support me on ko-fi!

seeing this get written was an experience! one of the things keeping me alive during prelim exams LOL if i remember correctly, this kind of started bc i was curious if bomens zira would actually have, i guess, a real demon equivalent the way shax (stork), beelzebub (fly), and furfur (deer) do. so i looked up the words 'crow demon' and whaddya know!

a crow demon!! and what's that? "cause Love"?

what a perfect fit for demon!aziraphale! and really, i was only messing around the first time i had the idea of "haha lol wouldn't it be funny if demon aziraphale was a crow", and then bam! all of it started to, surprisingly, fit well together pfttt (special thanks to bepo for being the one to piece it all together wheezes <33) (also, just really thank you all for bouncing ideas with me, it really does make me happy dfgdhjd <3333)

and then elle wrote a little snippet at first (IIRC) and then he just feakign!!!!!!! WOAGH!!!!!!! just, tasty delicious words, a fic that made me kick my feet like i was a schoolgirl while reading the whole thing ASKSKS <333

i'm really happy with all the spot art i drew for this! wanted it to look very uhhh, i wouldn't say storybook, but watercolor illustrations were definitely a huge inspiration! i wanted them to feel as nice and cozy as YOU would feel while reading elle's fic <3

i do gotta thank elle again for making these two fem-presenting when they were at the dowlings' bc then i get to draw butch gardener crowley. do you know how much that means to me? do you know do you do y do you know how m how much that how m b butches butches butches .

and a little bonus, one where crowley did not want to pose for the painting PFTT

i am once again putting the link here if you've scrolled this far down without reading it yet, go! go! go!!! IT'S SO GOOD!!!! <3333

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colleendoran · 2 years ago

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Thank you for maintaining boundaries

I am extremely happy that so many of you are enthusiastic Good Omens fans. It is wonderful that this delightful book by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman has touched so many hearts, and it is wonderful that everyone loves the show.

However...

I can't read fanfic.

I can't look at fan art.

I did not secure rights to the Good Omens adaptation with my wicked cartoonist wiles. I was approached by Pratchett/Gaiman about doing the adaptation a year ago.

I am not the boss.

Everything I do goes through an approval process.

Everything I do is BOOK based, not SHOW based.

In order to keep my head clear, I haven't even been able to watch the show for months and months. Which is sad, because I love it, and during COVID it kept me very happy. I watched it dozens of times.

I know how personal head canon can affect memories of a beloved book or show. I cannot possibly satisfy everyone's head canon.

I'm not going to try to.

I have to continually check and recheck what The Book says about each scene to make sure I'm not straying too far from the source.

I make what I consider to be only minor changes re: acting and staging so that a scene may work better in the static comic art medium. I make cuts where necessary to fit the format. I make only the most minor dialogue changes.

All of this means a lot that is in the show is not in the book because it wasn't in the book in the first place.

I am not the boss.

Everything I do goes through an approval process.

I can't look at fanfic or fanart.

I do appreciate your enthusiasm and love.

I'm going back to work.

#good omens graphic novel #neil gaiman #terry pratchett

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lowkeyerror · 1 month ago

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Just Hold Me

Rio Vidal x Reader

Word Count: 1k

Notes: Fluff x 100, comfort x 1 million, very soft

Summary: You had a rough day and Rio wants to comfort you, but she wonders if she's doing enough.

An: The yearly fluff I post after Christmas. Soft as a bunny's tail.

Masterlist

Love was such a strange thing. Tangled up in emotions like hurt, betrayal, and longing, but also bathed in happiness, care, and optimism. It was complex enough with normal people, but you had fallen for Death itself.

Loving Rio was like loving a hurricane. It was wild and even if some things were predictable, you couldn’t always prepare for what was to come. Having a trail of destruction behind her was a part of her job.

It was something she only found shame in when she was with you. She didn’t want you to think that of her. The truth being, that you never could. It was what had drawn you to her in the first place. Death didn’t scare you, not at all. Falling into her embrace felt like destiny. You’d tell her, but Rio was never one for fate, she said if anything it was an omen.

She was so scared of the consequences when it came to being with you. She tried to go against her urges, but you were patient. In her mind you’d forget her and move on with someone more suitable, but you never did. You knew what you wanted and it was her.

There would never be anyone to come close.

Rio was a good girlfriend. She was affectionate, and as attentive as she could be. There were still some things that she was uncertain about when it came to her emotions. After all she had only learned them from her limited experience in other relationships and observing others. She had seen a lot, but that didn’t mean she understood it all.

So when she appeared in your home to find your curled up on the couch, hidden by a blanket, she simply tilted her head to the side before approaching you.

“Love?”

You heard her voice, but felt like you couldn’t move or speak. Instead you let out a soft hum in response. It caught Rio off guard, she was still assessing the situation, but it wasn’t looking good.

She stepped into your point of view, crouching so that she could meet your eyes. She was taken aback by the sadness in them. The bags under your eyes were dark and heavy. Rio pouted seeing the red hues scattered in them.

She reaches out cautiously to hold your face in her hands. Her touch was warm, it made you briefly close your eyes.

“What happened?” Rio’s voice was soft, as if she was scared of pushing.

However you weren’t like the lovers of her past. You wouldn’t push her away, so you took a deep breath trying to muster up your voice.

“Hold me,” you managed to murmur.

Rio was quick to shed her work clothes and create more comfortable attire for the sake of both of you. You briefly sat up on the couch, only enough for the Green Witch to slip behind you. Once she was behind you, you tugged her arm over your body. You held it in place keeping her hold on you tight.

Rio places a delicate kiss on the back of your neck, “I'm not going anywhere."

For a while you stay in that position silently. Neither of you break through the quiet. Rio thinks she’s eventually going to hear your breathing level but it doesn’t.

“Long day,” you mumble against her hand.

“I think I know something about those,” Rio threaded her fingers through yours.

You let out a small laugh, “I bet you do.”

You feel the time shift again. You turn to face Rio who scans over your features again.

“Is there something I can do?”

You see the worry in her eyes and it makes your heart swell. The smallest furrow in her brow, the usual mischief in her eyes is gone, her tone is missing the teasing edge.

“Just this,” you bury your head in the crease of her neck.

You inhale deeply, her scent always grounds you. That specific scent of earth freshly hit with rain. You could get lost in her aroma, it almost makes you feel like you’re outside. You can feel her skin cooling, which only submerges you deeper into the fantasy.

Now both of her hands hold you. She kisses the top of your head. Rio is still uncertain about it she should be doing more for you. This didn't feel like enough. She wanted to destroy whatever it was that made your day so hard. Seeing you in this state was tugging at her heart strings.

She began to trace patterns into your back. You didn't mind, you like having her hands on you, being this close together. It helped you feel safe.

“Are you sure it’s enough,” Rio whispers, insecurities gnawing at her.

You pull back just enough to look at her, “Rio Vidal you’ll always be enough for me.”

Your words knocked the wind right out of her, she felt her face getting warm under your gaze, but she wasn’t trying to hide it from you.

“I’d do anything for you, you know that? Legal or illegal. If I need to go fuck up your boss I will. If I need to pop your annoying coworkers tire, I will. If you needed me to hunt down a Karen I-"

“I know,” you cut her off.

“All of the above?” Rio wriggles her eyebrows playfully.

You move to sit up and she sits beside you.

You rub a hand over your face, “Work was fine, I guess. A few difficult customers, but nothing out of the ordinary. I don’t really know why, but today just felt harder to get through than other days. Nothings wrong, I just feel a little… down.”

Rio listen intently as you speak. When you finish she nods slowly, “I think I know what you need.”

“You do?”

Rio nods with a little more certainty, “Let me cook for us. We’ll order some snacks and pop in a movie. We can keep cuddling too. And tomorrow, I think you should call out. We’ll spend the whole day together, I know all the best parks for walks. How does that sound?”

You let out a sigh of relief, “That sounds perfect. I love you.”

Rio places a gentle kiss on your lips, “I love you too.”

Rio reluctantly begins to stand, but you pull her back down, “Just hold me a bit longer?”

She lays her back flat on the couch and pulls you on top of her, stealing another peck.

“Always.”

#lowkeyerror #rio vidal #rio vidal x reader #rio vidal imagine

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tikosblogg · 8 months ago

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GET AWAY

Summary: you’re bad omens merch girl. You all decide to go on vacation, after tour. Your boyfriend is a real dick, and Noah tells you how he really feels.

Warnings: sexual content, p in v sex, oral (f receiving), a little violence, mentions of blood, cheating. Let me know if I missed anything.

A/n: not gonna lie, it was 3am and I was exhausted. I kind of rushed through the smut. This is not edited. I’m on vacation, and posting from my phone. So sorry it looks a little rough.

We finally walked into the lobby of the condo we were staying at for a very much needed vacation. Noah and the guys just finished an amazing tour, and they all decided to go to Miami Beach for the week. I became close with the guys after landing a job being their merch girl. “Everybody got their room keys?” Matt walked up with his suitcase, making sure we were good to go. Everyone gave their confirmations, as we headed towards the elevators. “I’m so excited for this week, we really needed this.” When I got no response, I turned towards my boyfriend of 1 year Justin. Nose deep in his phone, tapping away. “Hello?” I asked annoyed for the 100th time today. He finally looked up from his phone “hm? Oh yeah, for sure.” And down went his face again.

I rolled my eyes, turning my attention back to the guys with an excited smile. “So what do you guys have planned today??” They all turned towards me, giving me their full attention. Noah speaking up first. “I think me and the guys are gonna go buy some drinks, and sit on the beach. We had a long drive. Kind of just wanna chill for the rest of the evening” I nodded my head in agreement. It was kind of a rough drive, especially being packed in a van with 7 people.

“You guys wanna join us?” As I nodded my head yes, Justin quickly spoke up. “Nah man, thanks tho. We’re hitting up the bars tonight.” I looked up at just confused as hell. “Why do you wanna go to the bars? I thought we all came together to hangout TOGETHER?” AGAIN I was completely annoyed at his lack of consideration for me and my feelings. “Babe chill out. We literally have all week.” I quickly shut my mouth, and turned away before we got into an argument. I didn’t wanna argue with him, much less in front of the guys.

They all gave me an empathetic look, as the elevator doors finally opened. Everyone started piling in, Justin shoving in front of me with the rest of them. The elevator being at full capacity. I looked at Justin in pure bewilderment. “Seriously?” He turned towards me, and laughed. “We’ll see ya at the top! We’re all going to the same place.” Not only was I completely humiliated, but I was shocked.

Mine and Justin’s relationship was far from perfect. I just don’t understand what happened. We used to be so happy together. He used to be the best boyfriend. Then a couple weeks ago, he started acting different. He looked towards the rest of the guys, expecting them to laugh with him. As the doors started closing, a hand stopped them last second. “I’ll wait with you.” Noah grabbed his suitcase, rolling out and standing with me. The guys all gave him look, before the doors finally closed, sending them on their way up.

“Well that was a dick move.” Noah was the first to speak between us, as we waited for the next elevator. Me and Noah used to be really close friends. Best friends even. I befriended him, before the rest of the guys. He’s the reason I met Justin. I spent months, and months hung up over Noah, just waiting for any kind of sign that maybe he felt the same way. Eventually I had to move on, and Justin happened to be the one I moved on to. He was really attractive, and really sweet. We got along great, and had a lot in common.

My feelings never matched the same intensity as they did for Noah, but I was hoping the more time I spent with Justin, the feelings for Noah would eventually go away... but they haven’t. I just have to keep pushing them further and further down. I’m not sure why, but ever since Justin and I became a couple, Noah became distant. We don’t hangout anymore unless it’s with the rest of the guys. We don’t text as much, unless it’s about work. I guess that’s why it’s so awkward right now that we’re alone.

“Yeah it’s just been a long day for all of us.”

Why am I taking up for my asshole boyfriend’s shitty behavior? Not sure. We didn’t speak anymore, and continued awkwardly waiting on the doors to open. After the short ride up to our floor, we split separate ways to our rooms. “Thanks by the way….for waiting for me.” Noah turned towards me with a small smile on his face. “Always.” I felt my heart skip, as he turned back around, headed for his room at the other end of the hall. I let out a sigh walking towards our room dragging my luggage behind me.

I tried opening the door but it was locked. I banged on it a couple times, waiting for Justin to open it. Finally after a minute or two, the door swung open. “Hey. Took you long enough.” I scoffed, pushing past him, into our bedroom, slinging my suitcase against the bed. “You left me!” He huffed closing the door, before walking towards me. “Noah was literally with you y/n calm down.” He rolled his eyes, plopping onto the bed.

“Yeah because YOU my BOYFRIEND didn’t! What if he didn’t wait with me??” I was getting angrier by the second. His lack of care for my wellbeing really hurt. Yeah I might be acting a tad bit dramatic but still. It’s the principle of it. “My god babe! Then you would have came up by yourself! Now come on get ready.” I gave up. I knew arguing with him was pointless. I don’t even know why I bother.

Opening my suitcase, I grabbed an outfit and my makeup bag. I went straight to the bathroom to get ready, getting drunk and letting loose sounds like a great idea.

(Two days later)

I woke up to the sound of the bathroom door slamming shut, and the shower running. Groaning into my pillow, I finally sat up grabbing my phone to check the time. 7am. Why the fuck is he up at 7am? He never wakes up at this time, much less before I even do. The sound of buzzing, pulled me out of my thoughts. I looked over at Justin’s side of the bed where his phone lay. I picked it up to answer, and let whoever was calling know that he would call them back later, until I saw the caller ID. “A” before I could answer, the call ended. I went to unlock his phone, when a text popped up on the screen.

“Hey I’m here. Can’t wait to see you ❤️”

I felt my heart fall to my ass. No way. He’s cheating on me? With who?!? I quickly opened his text threads, seeing the the same contact a few scrolls down. There it was. All the proof I needed, to confirm it. He was in fact cheating on me. Flirty texts, a bunch of pictures sent back and forth. I felt like throwing up. The bathroom door swung open, and Justin walked out towel drying his hair.

“I’m going into town for-“ he stopped dead in his tracks, staring at me like he saw a ghost. “Who the fuck is A?” We sat there silently, just staring at each other. “Just a friend babe, don’t start acting crazy” I let out a sarcastic laugh. “Just a friend huh? Okay.” I threw his phone back at him, climbing out of bed. I grabbed my phone, and some clothes headed straight to the shower. I quickly sent a text in the bands group chat that they added me in a while back, Asking if they wanted to hang out today. I hit send, stripping off my clothes hopping into the shower.

I met the guys at some seafood place, to grab some food before we hung out on the beach. “So where is Justin?” Folio asked, digging into his crab legs. My smile instantly disappeared, thinking back to this morning. We haven’t spoken since then. I’m too humiliated to tell them, and I don’t want to ruin everyone’s trip because of my relationship issues.

I smiled, coming up with a quick lie. Well sort of a lie. “Oh he’s uh meeting up with a friend, he said he’ll catch up with us later.” They all nodded, and continued eating starting up another conversation. I let out a small sigh of relief, at the attention not being on me anymore. When I looked over, Noah was staring at me with a look I couldn’t quite read. I sent him a smile, that he then returned.

After we were all finished, and stuffed full we headed to the beach. I sat in my beach chair tanning while the boys ran through the water and threw a football around. The sound of footsteps met my ears, until they stopped right beside me. I lifted my head, looking over at Noah. He was soaking wet, from being in the ocean. He looked beaut- stop it y/n. He grabbed his towel, drying his hair and body before sitting down beside me.

“What’s going on y/n?” I laid my head back down, still smiling at him. “Just tanning. What abou-“ he quickly cut me off, shaking his head. “ no I mean what’s going on? I think you forget babe…I know you. I can tell something is bothering you.” Thank god I was wearing sunglasses. I could feel the stupid tears welling up in my eyes, along with the butterflies erupting in my stomach. He always used to call me that. I assumed he stopped out of respect for Justin…but I missed it. I didn’t want to lie to him, but again, I couldn’t ruin this trip. They worked so hard, and they deserve it. So I decided to tell him half of the truth.

“It’s nothing Noah, I promise. Me Justin just had a little argument this morning. Everything is okay now though. No need to worry about it.” I gave him the most convincing smile I could muster, and he just nodded his head thankfully ending the conversation. It was now getting dark, so we all packed up our things and headed to our rooms. Exiting the elevator, I gave each of the guys a hug. When I got to Noah, he wrapped his arms around me in a tight hug. I squeezed back, not wanting to let go.

When we finally released each other, I said one more goodbye to them headed to my room.

Noah pov

After we said bye to y/n me and the guys all hung out in our condo. I spoke up, interrupting the guys conversation. “Something’s going on with y/n but she won’t tell me.” They all looked at me, nick talking first. “Yeah we could tell. Just didn’t wanna pry.” I nodded in agreement. I knew she wasn’t being honest down at the beach, but I didn’t wanna make her uncomfortable. “Probably her dick head of a boyfriend pissing her off.” Jolly sighed, flopping onto the couch behind me.

Justin. The asshole who stole the women of my fucking dreams. I don’t care how cliche it sounds. It’s true. I’ve been in love with her for two years now. Justin was my friend, or so I thought. I mistakenly told him about my feelings for y/n. I told him everything. How I was planning on telling her how I felt. When I was gonna do it and where. Then all of sudden, he walks in the next day arm around her. flaunting her, right in my face.

I was devastated, but I acted happy for y/n. If he was who made her happy, I had to accept that. But Seeing how he treated her a few days ago when we got here, made me think differently. He ignored her the whole way here, and then was gonna leave her in the lobby. The hurt look on her face, made me rage. I’ve never wanted to beat the fuck out of someone so bad before.

I could feel my anger rising just thinking about it. I need to calm down, and quick before I go beat his ass right now. “You gonna come drink with us Noah?” Folio asked, as they all gathered their things, but I declined. “I think I’m gonna go take a walk. I’ll be back later.” They all nodded and went back to their conversation, as I headed down to the beach.

Y/n pov

After I got back to my room, I threw my stuff in the corner sat down on the living room couch. I let out a frustrated groan, shoving my face in my hands. I don’t know what to do. Obviously the right decision would be to dump his sorry ass. I’m just scared. Other than all the shitty things. What me and Justin have is good. It’s…comfortable. Justin is also Noah’s friend. If I leave him, who’s to say Noah doesn’t take Justin’s side? Then I’ll lose my boyfriend… and most importantly… Noah.

Just the thought of losing Noah shatters my heart completely. The door suddenly opened, Justin waltzing in with a smug smile on his face. “Hey babe.” I rolled my eyes, standing from the couch. I grabbed my phone, and slipped my shoes back on headed towards the door. “where are you going?” I stopped before opening it, turning back towards him. anger filling my entire body. “I need space Justin. I really don’t want to talk to you right now.”

He scoffed rolling his eyes. “You’re seriously pissed off that I have friends!? get the fuck over yourself!” He really knows how to get under my skin. “Oh I’m sorry I didn’t know friends flirted with each other and sent pictures back and forth.” He threw his stuff onto the bed shaking his head. “I just need space Justin. I need to think.” He didn’t bother looking at me, as he started unbuttoning his shirt. “Whatever y/n.”

I took that as my cue to leave, and walked out of the room slamming the door behind me. I can’t believe him. I have done everything for him. I have put my all into this relationship, and he couldn’t give a fuck less. I walked down to the beach, to relax and just think. I love the beach at night. Nobody is usually down here at this time, and the sound of the waves are so peaceful at night.

I sat down on one of the wooden lounge chairs, and finally let out the tears I’ve been holding in all day. I sobbed until my throat felt raw. After a little while I calmed down, but silent tears continued to fall. If I leave Justin, I might just lose everyone. I can’t let that happen. Where did it go wrong? Can we even come back from this? Maybe we could try couples therapy… that’s a thing right?

“Didn’t expect to see you down here.” I jumped at the sudden voice breaking the peaceful silence. I quickly wiped the tears off my face, smiling up at Noah. He was smiling until he saw my puffy face. He sat down beside me, throwing his arm over my shoulder pulling me into his side. “Hey..what’s wrong babe?” There he goes with that damn name again.

I shake my head, ready to brush it off again until he grabs the side of my face turning it towards his. We were so close. If I moved just an inch closer our noses would brush. “You know it’s really hurting my feelings that you keep lying to me y/n. I know something is going on. Tell me.” I couldn’t control it anymore. A sob broke free again, and Noah held me tighter to his chest. He ran his fingers through my hair until I finally calmed back down.

“He’s cheating on me” I finally confessed. This is it. I’m about to lose the one person that I care about most. I felt his body go stiff, but not a word was said. I could feel his heart pounding fast against my cheek. I decided to break the silence, I couldnt stand it. “I just.. I don’t know what to do. We were doing so good. Then it all just..went to shit..we kept fighting. I was hoping it was just phase, but I was wrong.” I sniffed, pulling away slightly to look at him. He was pissed. Seething.

I was so scared of what he was going to say. Would he be mad that I was accusing his friend of such a thing? His voice interrupted my thoughts. “You don’t deserve that y/n. He doesn’t deserve you.” I was speechless for a minute. He’s choosing my side? He’s been friends with Justin way longer than he has even known me. I could feel my anxiety slowly dissipating.

We finally disconnected from each other, but stayed close. Our shoulders pressing together. “I guess I’m just scared. I haven’t been alone in so long…I just..I know it sounds pathetic. He used to make me feel so loved. When it was good, it was good. I was able to look past all the bad. I’m scared to start over. What if I don’t find someone who loves me like he did at one point?” Noah listened intently to every word.

“You’re not pathetic y/n. It’s normal to feel the way you do, but please listen to me when I say you don’t deserve it. You deserve every fucking good thing in this god forsaken world, and he is a fucking idiot.” My heart was beating out of my chest at every word that came out of his mouth. He is making it so hard not to fall deeper in love with him.

Love. Did I really just say that? Yes I did. Because I do, and I’m tired of fighting it. “You know I used to be so confident. I was always putting myself out there. Wasn’t afraid to make the first move. I was outgoing, and fun. I let him ruin me, how could someone love a person so fucked up.” The tears started falling again, as I harshly wiped them away.

“I do. You’re not fucked up. You’re hurt. I’m sure right now isnt the best time to say this, but fuck it. I’m tired of keeping it to myself. I love you. I have fucking loved you for two years now.” I was frozen in shock. I can’t believe what my ears are hearing right now. I feel like this is a dream, and I’m about to wake up any minute. We stared at each other, until I finally found my words. “Noah ..are you serious?”

He nodded his head, as we just stared at each other. “Yeah…and Justin knew that too.” Justin knew?? What is he talking about? “What do you mean?” I was in disbelief at what I was hearing right now.

“Well Justin was my best friend…..since we were kids. I trusted him. I told him about the feelings I had for you. Told him about how I was gonna ask you out and everything.” he looked away, looking at the ground.

I stayed quiet, waiting for him to finish. “Then the next day, he walks into the house…with you. Hand in hand.” I clenched my hand to my chest. My heart physically hurt. I can’t believe it. I could have had Noah, I almost had Noah….but I said yes to Justin. Of course I didn’t know at the time, but still. It hurts just as bad. “Noah…why..why didn’t you say anything?” He let out a small tired laugh.

“You seemed happy…that’s all that mattered. All I wanted..I didn’t wanna ruin that for you.” He said softly, finally looking at me again. My tears finally slowed down, and I softly grabbed his hand resting on his thigh. “Noah…if I would’ve known…” I was at a loss of words. This is my chance. I had to tell him the feelings were mutual. “I felt the same way…I do feel the same way. I thought you didn’t see me like that.. that’s why I said yes to him.”

Noah chuckled, rubbing his hand down his face. “Guess we both fucked up huh?” We both let out quiet laughs. We kept eye contact, but said nothing. Before I knew it, we were both leaning in. When our lips finally touched, my whole body melted into the kiss. His hand moved from under mine, to my cheek. Before we could deepen it any further, a loud voice interrupted us. “OH SO THIS IS WHERE YOU WENT? TO FUCK MY BESTFRIEND?”

We jumped apart, both quickly shooting up from our seats. Justin. Fuck. He was walking fast down the beach from the condos we were staying in. I quickly jumped over the chair to him. “Justin wait! It’s-“ he got in my face, before shoving me backwards. “SHUT UP WHORE! I SHOULD HAVE FUCKING KNOWN!” As I fell back, I landed on the chair, the wooden edge scraping the skin of my leg.

I looked down, to see a nasty gash on my inner thigh. Before anything could be said, Noah flew from behind me. He tackled Justin to the sand, sending blow after blow to his face. All I could do, was watch in complete shock. I’ve never seen Noah so angry. After a few more blows to Justin’s face, Noah stood back up. “DONT YOU EVER PUT YOUR FUCKING HANDS ON HER!”

Justin just laid there, groaning in pain. Noah turned back around, grabbing my hand. “C’mon we’re getting your stuff, you’re gonna stay with me.” I let him lead me away, not before stopping beside Justin. I looked at him for a few seconds, he was fucked up. His nose was probably broken, and his lips were split. I calmly spoke. “Fuck you.”

We got inside, and headed towards the elevator. As we waited for the doors to open, I could still feel Noah basically vibrating with anger. The doors opened, and we walked straight in, and rode up in silence. We got to my room, and luckily I only had a few things taken out of my bag. So we quickly grabbed them, stuffed them back in and went to Noah’s room. When we walked in, he sat my suitcase on the desk in his bedroom, and turned towards me.

“Shit you’re bleeding.” I looked down, and sure enough, blood was running down my leg straight into my shoe. “It’s okay, it doesn’t even hurt anymore.” He walked straight past me, and into the bathroom. I heard him shuffling around in the cabinets, and come back with a little first aide kit. I tried to protest again, telling him I’d just rinse it off in the shower. He ignored me, and bent down infront of me.

“Spread your legs for me.” Although he said it innocently, I couldn’t help the blush the covered my cheeks. He got the disinfectant wipes, and cleaned off the blood and around the gash. Pulling out some ointment and a big bandaid, and started applying them gently. As he did, I caught a glimpse of his right hand. His knuckles were busted. “I’m so sorry Noah.” My hand found its way to his head, running my fingers through his hair. I felt guilty. I ruined our trip, because of my fucked up relationship, and now he’s hurt. He froze, and looked up at me, clearly confused.

“Why are you apologizing to me?” He stayed there, waiting for me response. “Your knuckles they’re busted…and I ruined our trip.” he didn’t move a muscle, looking straight into my eyes, and just shook his head. “You didn’t ruin anything, and I’d do it again.” His voice was just above a whisper. “He put his fucking hands on you, I want to fucking kill him.” He placed a kiss to the bandage on my thigh, before slowly rising to his feet. As soon as he got in reach his lips were back on mine again. His arm going under my ass, to lift me all the way up with him, to his full height. My legs wrapped around his waist without a second thought.

Our kiss deepened, as he walked us to the bed, laying me onto it. His kisses moved down, over my cheek, and down my neck. “Noah…” I whined, ready to just feel him. All of him. He lifted his head, planting another kiss on my lips. “I know baby..” he lifted my shirt up and off of me, throwing it somewhere else in the room.

His lips instantly attaching to one of my tits, while his hand groped and played with my other one. I was a moaning mess. He was barely doing anything yet, and I’d never felt so good in my life. His lips moved down my stomach, to the top of my shorts. “I wanna taste you so bad baby.” He whispered against my skin.

.“Noah please..” I am not above begging. I finally have the man of my dreams, and I want all of him. Now. He unbuttoned my shorts, dragging them off a long with my underwear. He took no time to spread my thighs. He groaned, seeing how wet I was for him. All for him. With one last kiss to the inside of my thigh, he dove straight in. His lips wrapped around my clit, sucking it into his mouth.

I gasped in pleasure, my hands falling to his head. I grabbed handfuls of his hair softly tugging it. He groaned against me, sending delicious vibrations through my core. “You taste so good baby.” He ran his tongue up and down the full length of my pussy, until I was shaking with pleasure. “I’m so close Noah..please please”

He took his left hand, teasing my hole with two fingers before fully sinking them in. I moaned out at the feeling. He continued pumping his fingers, and licking my clit. I could feel my orgasm coming, as I started grinding my hips into his face. I came with a loud whine of his name. He moaned again, as he licked up my release.

“Fuck…such a good girl.” He leaned over me, kissing me hard. Shoving his tongue in my mouth, so I could taste myself. I grabbed the bottom of his shirt, pulling it up and off of him, throwing it onto the floor. Our lips connected again, as he reached for his sweats. He pulled them down just enough to pull his dick out.

“Are you okay?” He was panting, struggling to stay still. I nodded my head, begging him to move. He stood back up completely, holding my thighs apart, watching himself disappear inside of me, over and over again. “Fuck Noah, faster.” He felt incredible. I’ve never felt this good during sex. He sped up until he was pounding into me. He kept my thighs spread wide, pushing them into my chest. The new angle making him reach even deeper. “Fuck baby your pussy feels so good wrapped around my dick.” All I could do was moan in response. He looked back down between us before spitting directly on my clit, and rubbing over it with his thumb.

“C’mon baby, cum for me.” I was so close, and I could tell he was too. After a few more thrust, I came hard around him. Pushing my head down against the mattress, and arching my back, my head was fuzzy and light. “Good girl…fuck..” he quickly pulled out, finishing on my chest and stomach. He leaned back over, bringing me into a wet rushed kiss. “I love you so much angel..”

“I love you too.”

#bad omens #noah sebastian #badomensimagines #noah sabastian smut #noahsebastiancult #imagines #bad omens cult #bad omens band

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goodomensafterdark · 7 days ago

Text

The GOAD Epic Goblins present - The Serpent and The Owl Volume 0 - The World I Created - Chapter 1

Thank you @quona for this gorgeous artwork!!

Chapter written by @kotias

As per the teaser video shared on Saturday on our subreddit...

We made it.

February 19th, 2024: launch date of the epic fic project.

January 19th, 2025: the publishing of the epic fic, named The Serpent and the Owl, starts.

11 months in the making. Wow.

Total amount of people who wrote or made art for this epic fic:

69 writers and artists.

Nice.

Total amount of people involved in the project:

75 people, including:

35 writers

31 artists

4 creators who took on both writing and art

5 betas (+3 writers and 1 artist who took on the task)

1 podficcer

This is the first part of a series in 7 parts.

Expect a new chapter of this epic fic every Wednesday and Sunday for the next 6 months.

And I promise: there is a happy ending to this story. Just not quite yet.

When I launched this crazy idea, based on Soggy’s request on the GOAD Writers Guild subreddit, I would never have thought it would turn into this.

Hell, part of me didn’t believe the project would succeed.

Did I wish very hard it would? Yes, of course.

Was I fully convinced it would? No. With such an endeavour, with so many people involved, and a full narration to develop with dozens of participants, I had no way of being certain of it.

And yet, look at this: it’s ready, after 11 months, to be shown to this subreddit and to the Good Omens fandom.

I cannot begin to find the right words to express how I'm feeling as well. This feels a little surreal; we managed to make something cohesive, might I even say a good story, with so many people involved.

Thank you all Epic Goblins so much for being such amazing people to work with ❤️

I have to say... seeing the first bits of conversations that we had on this project, and remembering how everyone was confused and scared at first, throwing ideas left and right and trying to even start to having something coherent and cohesive...

We're finally there, and it's beautiful and glorious and it's thanks to everyone and.... ❤️

Enormous thank you to @theravenmuse for your undying support during this entire endeavour. It took months, but hell, thank you for holding the fort when I wasn't able to, and for this gorgeous spreadsheet that helped us keep track of EVERYTHING.

My most sincere thanks to my dear lieutenants and Art General: @quona @eybefioro @whatareyou42 @gaiaseyes451 @theonewiththeshippinggoogles

You have all done amazingly to keep the teams together, to wrangle them, whether I was here or not, and working so hard to find a cohesion within each team and a narrative direction for each story that was created within the greater narration.

And of course, thank you to everybody involved.

Thank you for trusting me and for following me here. And ENORMOUS thank you to our betas, who have been phenomenal: ModernDayKlutz, DBacklot, WiblyWoblyTimeyWimey, GlitteringRock, ireallyneedmoretea, itsscottiesstark, TheGaroMask, Abaddon Sahar, cordsycords, without whom this fic would not have gotten to the quality it has reached today.

I love you all, thank you all so much for embarking in this crazy adventure with me. We’re done. And we did remarkably well. I am very honoured of having been given your trust, all of you.

I won’t lie, I've been crying from the emotion quite a bit in the last couple of months, and got very teary eyed writing this blurb. :')

Please enjoy the very first chapter to this epic fic project, starting with Volume 0: The World I Created, Ch.1: Bringing upon the Dawn

Word count: 3418 words

Tags (for the whole fic): Crowley's Name is Crawly | Crawley (Good Omens), Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Space, Crowley is a Singularity, Aziraphale is an bird alien, Slow Burn, Porn With Worldbuilding, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Major character death, but… Reincarnation AU, Eventual Happy Ending, not in this part though, Inappropriate use of astronomy, Original People, Monsterfucker Aziraphale (Good Omens), Cloaca, Hemipenes, Crowley is a naga, Crowley is a Giant Snake, Star Snake, This is an epic, Crowley Loves Aziraphale (Good Omens), Aziraphale Loves Crowley (Good Omens), Bottom Crowley (Good Omens), Top Aziraphale (Good Omens), Power Bottom Aziraphale (Good Omens), Top Crowley (Good Omens), Oral Sex, Crowley's enemy is Life itself, War, Intercelestial War,Aziraphale is "just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing" (Good Omens), Crowley is Bad at Communicating (Good Omens), Crowley is Bad at Feelings (Good Omens), Crowley is Down Bad (Good Omens)

TW/CW (for this chapter): blood, death, war

Summary:

~This story starts, as it will end, in the stars.~

Crawly is a singularity, born in the Empty and thriving in it, until the day Life settles into the universe. As that happens, she descends onto the planets in her vicinity.

Several centuries, maybe even millennia, pass; Crawly got integrated enough in the society of a planet that she (I'll go with she/her pronouns) is the long-standing Queen and main deity of that planet.

Aziraphale comes as a scientist from another planet that hers made an agreement with; thus begins their relationship. Crawly slowly comes to terms with her feelings with Aziraphale as their story evolves and their travels through the galaxy continue.

Excerpt:

Of all the places that Jala could have expected to find the Mother of All Suns, the cemetery of a remote village wasn’t her immediate thought; and yet, when she saw Her, there was no possible doubt.

A statue was standing on a pedestal, holding a sword in front of her legs. She had her eyes closed peacefully, her eternal beauty remained in her stone flesh, a lone ruby shining on her forehead like a diadem. Her hair fell like a veil from her head over her shoulders, arms and waist, circling her entirely.

Jala was certain of one thing; anybody who didn’t need her presence or believe in her would have passed this statue by without much thought, or might have just recognised the shape of the statue as an ancient former Queen of the planet. Jala however remained in awe before it for a very long time, pulled in by its magnitude.

She eventually closed the distance between them, climbing on the pedestal and rising to meet her gaze, raising a hand to stroke the stone cheek. “How long we have looked for you, my Queen,” she whispered, a tear breaking from her eye and trickling down her face. “How desperately we craved your presence.”

The statue remained lifeless between her fingers, but Jala smiled. The end was nigh.

Keep reading here!

~Kotias

#crowley #aziraphale #ineffable spouses #aziracrow #azicrow #crowazi #good omens after dark #goad #good omens #good omens fanfic #writers of after dark #writers guild presents #good omens fanart #artists of after dark #The Serpent and the Owl #TSATO

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fellshish · 12 days ago

Note

warning: small rant incoming, neil talk, no graphic SA talk though

“good omens fans only care about their blorbos, how can you even think about your show right now when there are real victims” WE’VE known for months, and WE spent months pressuring amazon to either kick neil off the production or not produce s3 at all!!! WE did that!!!!! so don’t tell us we don’t care about victims or about women’s safety when we put effort into doing something that ACTUALLY helps keep people safe.

“there is no ethical way to enjoy his work. this is just too important.” obviously, we should all avoid giving financial support to neil wherever we can. and i understand that people want to see him punished, but who ACTUALLY benefits from all of us abandoning this show and our fan communities? who? do his victims know or care that there are still good omens fans out there? or is this just a demand for virtue signalling, to show everyone WE’RE one of the good ones by burning all our books and quitting our favorite shows cold turkey?

“you’ll find new things to care about” yknow, i did that the last time something i loved turned out to be created by a terrible person. it left a massive hole in my heart for years. i wasn’t the same. nothing made me equally as happy. until i found good omens, ironically enough. so what do i do? keep cyclically punishing myself for daring to love things while not knowing their creators are bad people?

no one benefits from my misery. me giving up on something i love, something that was co-created by so many people, has zero effect on that monster. nor does it do anything to help his victims. all it does is make me unhappy.

as a final note, from personal experience, i’m willing to bet at least half of these people love something that was created by someone awful, and find a way to rationalize it to themselves because THEIR situation is somehow very different.

sorry for the rant. i hope you’re feeling better! 💕

💜 glad you got this out of your system. i think people will have a really hard time finding an unproblematic piece of art with a morally perfect creator. i hope we’ve long abandoned that type of (self) policing

#my asks #neil gaimen allegations #neil gaiman #cw sa mention #tw sa mention #sorry @ the other anon who sent me an ask i just don’t have the spoons to invite that kind of discourse in my notifs currently #neil gaiman allegations

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sabine-smitten-obviously · 27 days ago

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Good Omens - December reads part #3- fanfics recs 🤓🩷🎄

I ´ve decided to write a short summary each month about the books i read. I need this to let go of the stories, its a nice way of saying good-bye to them and to spread the love to the authors and to you. 🩷

I only read finished stories and rarely one-shots. You will find no WIPs in here, as i really like to dive deep into the plot and i keep losing track of WIPs. Also you will only find happy or at least hopeful endings here - i couldn´t handle anything else.

Also i try to find every author here on tumblr to link-to, but sadly some times i am out of luck. If you happen to know them, please tell them, write to me in the comments or DM me and i will update the post!

Ratings in ()

Multichapter Fanfics

Dark Literature (E) by @unproblematicme

Well this was a first for me. Human AU with our ineffable loves being exes. Ugh. Lucky for me, Aziraphale is hired by Gabriel to work for the same company on a regular basis. But all of this somehow fades into the background as a haunting starts on the 13th floor of the building. Massive ghoststory and halloween-vibes ensues! 🎃

I'd like to think i still know you (T) by @inherently_human

Human AU. Crowley and Aziraphale went to school together, before life took them on separate paths. Crowley actually detests the thought of the 30years reunion, but ... maybe he would meet Aziraphale again?

Biggest laugh: "Age has not done your eloquence any favors, I see." 😂

The ineffable bride (T) by @theravenmuse

Warlock asks Nanny Astoreth to read him a book he got from the gardener. The story is about a prince named Aziraphale, who fell in love with a farm boy that left to make good fortune, but never came back. Now he is supposed to marry Prince Gabriel.

Happiness, more or less (M) by @mllekurtz

Crowley moves into a flat above a bookshop, glad to have found a short lease. If it weren't for the strange noises in the night ... A ghost story, a love story.

Biggest laugh: "i'm not learning the riddle you have for a name." 😅 I love love love this one. It had me laugh, it had me on the edge and it made me cry. Please give this one a try! 🩷

Intermezzo (E) by @feraltuxedo

Crowley is a former Rockstar, whose career as opera-writer was crashed by Aziraphale Fell's official critique. 10 years later Crowley is offered to write a symphony and get a TV documentary on it, but there is a catch: Aziraphale is the one who will be presenting. Human AU, Enemies to lovers, very nice. Also the author has a way of leading up to and describing explicit scenes that had me wish for more. 😋

The accidental understudy (T) by @appleseeds

Human AU. Aziraphale is the stage manager, when he re-meets with famous actor and former school-collegue Crowley for a play of panto. Sweet fluff ensues as both have had their secret crushes for 30 years.

Love Thy Neighbor (E) by @snae-b

Aziraphale runs a successful bakery blog, but recently he is getting more and more delayed with his posts. The new neighbor is simply a nuisance with his construction noises throughout the day and his loud music in the night. One evening his temper gets the best of him and Aziraphale fists on the door. What will he see, when the door opens? You'll never guess. 😉

Oneshots

Naked in Malibu (E) by @cemeteryangel725

Human AU. Crowley is a famous actor, who is home early from his shoot without telling anyone. And naked. Aziraphale is the hired interior designer, who just so happens to be in Crowley´s home to redesign it. The rest is epic seduction and surprises beneath clothes.

Actually a re-read, as the author gifted us a with a sequel for christmas - see next! 🤓

Naked in New York (E) by @cemeteryangel725

Crowley and Aziraphale have been dating secretly for months now. They both have been falling in love and - of course, these are our beloved idiots! - they have NOT been talking about it. But there is this big red carpet-thingy coming up. Oh no, what is Crowley supposed to do? 😉

Hot Blood, Hot thoughts, Hot Deeds (E) by @supergeek21

Aziraphale sorts the books, when shortky before closing time a strange looking man, dressed all in Black and kind of outdated clothes comes in. He has quite some sharp teeth, too ... 🧛‍♂️🦇

The Serpent King (T) by @angela345

After the death of his father, King Gabriel rules the country. But a curse seems to have befallen the former prosperous kingdom. So knights are being sent out to the Serpent King of the neighbouring kingdom. Will they be able to break the spell? A fairytale.

Stocking Stuffers (E) by @cemeteryangel725

Yes, i know - this is the 3rd rec for @cemeteryangel725 in this blog alone. What can i say - she is a glorious (smut)writer. 😁 In this one we meet again with our beloved husbands from the human AU "Of fire and falcons", which you should definitely read, too. In this oneshot Crowley does a little christmas-strip for his Santaziraphale. 🌶️🎅

Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boutique (T) by @dragonfire42

Aziraphale goes shopping with Jim to dress him up for the ball ... Sweet!

The Snake Prince (T) by @LTRisback

Aziraphale takes a walk and bumps into a snake - a talking snake. He offers to save him from the cold and takes him to his bookshop.

Sweet, short fairytale i found bc of another artist who made this beautiful Art to it @rocas-are-doing-well

Only Ever Meant For Someone Else (T) by @di-42

Human AU. Every year the night before christmas, Aziraphale drives his passengers for free as an act of charity. This year, when he has finally finished his shift, there is a commotion behind him. Realising the other driver has wrecked his bentley, he offers to take him to the hospital, where his - presumably - wife Anathema is in labour.

Beautiful little christmas story, seasoned with a bit of angst and a happy ending. 🎄

Biggest laugh: “Of course. I can see how this entire predicament is very clearly her fault.” 😅

I loved this story and it stayed with me for several days.

All the pretty girls (T) by @spectrallydistracted

Crowley has made a pact with Ana to date each week for a whole year - or as long as it takes to find a partner. Sadly all the pretty girls never click. Unlike the very male barista Aziraphale ... 😉

So thats 16 stories this time, next year i will start counting for the whole year, just for the fun of it. 🥳

Found something you like? Spread the love with kudos, sharing and loving 😅🩷

Have a wonderfull start to 2025! 🎆

#good omens #good omens fanfiction #ineffable husbands #fanfic #good omens fandom #good omens fanfic rec #crowly x aziraphale #crowley #aziraphale #smutty fanfiction #fanfiction #ao3 fanfic #fanfics #fanfic rec #i read my fanfics at night #thank your for your fanfiction!

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flowery-mess · 3 months ago

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Sorry haven’t been on tumblr for a while and idk if you still want this haha

Not really an opinion per se but what do you think the Bad Omens Boys (plus Matt) love languages are? I headcanon Matt as physical touch and maybe subtle acts of service?? For some reason

Would love to hear your thoughts💕

Okay I love this! More under the cut

So the five love languages:

words of affirmation

quality time

acts of services

gifts

physical touch

Jolly

So I see Jolly as the mature one of the group, he has this calm aura around him, so I see him as a words of affirmation kinda guy, mainly because I think he's good at communication so maybe he doesn't have problems with talking about his feelings. And quality time also fits for him I think.

Noah

So the first that came to my kind was gifts. Maybe because he feels bad for being away on tour he would try to make it up with gifts. Then also physical touch fits him in my opinion. He seems like the guy who always has his hand on your knee, around your shoulder or mindlessly plays with your fingers. Not heavy PDA, even sitting next to you shoulder by shoulder is enough. And I know Noah is kinda often perceived as someone who doesn't know how to talk about his feelings on here, but I think Noah is very well spoken person with rich vocabulary, so I think words of affirmation too.

Folio

Gifts and acts of services, but in a Folio way. Meaning - not expensive gifts and big gestures, but he sees something funny that reminds him of you and he gets it for you. Could be funny keychain or the most useless thing. Acts of services - I can see him helping you clean or cook, again in a Folio way. He keeps singing and dancing around the room, making you do it with him and have a laugh together.

Nick

He seems like a laid back guy, kinda shy and just be happy back home and spend some quality time with you. Could be just watching tv and cuddling together or going on walks or going to see a movie. Also acts of services, buys you your favorite coffee or your favorite shampoo when he sees you're running out.

Matt

I agree with you on physical touch, but in a different way than Noah. I think Matts touches are more intimate, he likes to hug you from behind and squeeze your waist, or puts his hand around your waist and rest his hand on top of your ass, or when he's working at home and you come to bring him food, he puts his head on your tummy and rests his hands on your ass with light pats. Also Matt gives me big yapper vibe, so I think he wouldn't have problem with words of affirmation.

#noah sebastian #jolly karlsson #matt dierkes #nick folio #nick ruffilo #bad omens #bad omens imagine

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shorthaltsjester · 3 months ago

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while vox machina reading percy’s letter is something i would love to see in tlovm i doubt it will make an appearance just for hard to fit in reasons, but that said i do really like that they’re integrating a lot of the inner work of percy that we get insight on through that letter in his words and actions thus far. his words at the end of ep 6 when he says “i’ve worried these hands would always carry the stain of evil. but, perhaps i can finally scour them clean in ripley’s blood” were ones that immediately stood out as an echo to his post-mortem words in the letter. because while it is a banger of a line, it’s in response to vex raising concern that this is just vengeance in different clothes, and percy doesn’t really assuage that well by explaining that he thinks he’ll cleanse himself of evil by dousing himself in blood. in the letter he writes “i traded the world’s safety for the belief that i could murder my way to peace, that if i could be a greater horror, it would bring my family back. once this lie was shattered, i scrambled to find a solution, to make a deal, to undo my mistakes and balance the scales. i now understand there are no scales. there is no redemption, and no ledger that judges me good or evil.” which i really see in the fluctuating attitude we see with percy given the adjustment of pre-[redacted] perc’ahlia where percy is happy and sees a future unfolding as he’s let go of his vengeance but this spectre of his past and his choices keeps interrupting it in the guise of ripley & orthax, leading to us getting to see him talk about building a future in whitestone and wrangling with the fact that — as it exists now — his legacy is one he views as solely of death and destruction and failing those close to him (which. god the fact that the hot tub scene and the destruction of whitestone are the same episode is insane but. percy having just been told by vax that he thought percy attracted danger and the reminder that he was the cause of vex’s death and then in the rubble of whitestone castle thinking he’d have to beg vex to join him as if she hasn’t been fully ride or die for him since before vm arrived in whitestone for the first time. obsessed with a couple where they both think they’re bad omens and both view each other as one of the best things that could’ve happened to them).

one of my favourite things about percy’s character arc in terms of looking at it as a narrative has always been the dismissal of ‘redemption’; not because he hasn’t done horrible things, but because redemption is irrelevant to the fact that percy does survive and he does move forward and that he cannot undo the past; neither to stop himself from making the world worse with his weapons nor to save his family from destruction — all of which would be true whether or not he was sufficiently redeemed. i am sad (though i very much understand why percy’s visit with the raven queen wasn’t included in the show) that we don’t get the scene of percy being confronted with the brokenness of mortaldom when the raven queen tells him he (and every mortal) is broken and scrambling both in front of her and with his actions after because he is a self-proclaimed fixer. because that conversation brings about the reality that there are things that cannot, will not, and should not be fixed. and percy takes that seriously, and commits himself, shed of a notion that he is determined solely by gods or his past, to looking forward. and though we don’t get the gods aspect of it in the show, we do get his conversation with vex in front of the fire, telling her he finds himself excited to feel possibility for the first time (while also extending a place for her in that possibility with him which . head in hands. a future he had cheaply sold away) and that he looks forward to building something instead of destroying. that vex reminded him days earlier to forgive himself while he was tinkering at a desk with a model clock tower resting on it. i have my critiques of tlovm but i do think they’re doing truly phenomenal work with retelling percy’s story in particular and i’m psyched to see where the rest of this season takes that as they deal with ripley, whatever version of glintshore we may see, and the ramifications for the person percy becomes after.

#percival de rolo #percy de rolo #perc’ahlia #vex’ahlia #critical role #tlovm #tlovm spoilers #the legend of vox machina #percy + vex #cr1 spoilers #cr1

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vidavalor · 2 months ago

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Ok,Since the Good Omens Finale is only going to be 90 minutes,I have a feeling we might not get a flashback sequence.

Hi there, @rougeside4 💕 I made an apple pie, if you want some. 😊Allow me to offer a different take? I wouldn't worry about this. There will be flashbacks. It's not the show without them.

Short thing on why we're definitely getting flashbacks and on which ones we can maybe see as being very likely still in The Finale.

The secret sauce of Good Omens, imho, is that the real juice of the story is actually always in the flashbacks. The flashbacks that we see are not random; they're always written to support the story in the present. There's a point to why it is these flashbacks we are seeing-- and when and in what order we are seeing them--when Crowley and Aziraphale have been on Earth for over 6,000 years and we could see any of their adventures. They're designed to inform our understanding of the story in the present. The real beating heart of the story is in the scenes set in the past and the story in the present would lack... *searches for words* emotional resonance? thematic weight? general, dramatic oomph? all of these?... if they were to cut the past. Put more plainly: it would suck 😂, and they're smart enough not to do that.

I think some of the most exciting parts of The Finale are actually going to be the flashbacks, just like how they were always the biggest treats in S1 and S2. In the way that they roll those out to us, piece by piece, they're changing our understanding of what we're watching in the present. The meaning of the story in the present is driven by the flashbacks in the past to a point that you cannot have one without the other.

Good Omens is actually driving all of its suspense and anticipation through the story in the past and that's what makes its non-linear storytelling clever. After all, right now, most people know this thing has a happy ending and aren't worried about that, right? We know Crowley and Aziraphale will get back together and be fine and no one is stressing over that. (And if you are... really? Guys. Honestly?! It's called Good Omens. It's a romance. It's a sweet, cuddly show. It's going to be fine. 💕)

So, what are we curious about, if not where it's going in the present?

1941, Part 3, right? Whether or not there's an ancient times vavoom coming our way? What the deal is with Jane Austen and/or 1650? Whether or not we might be surprised with a flashback that hasn't already been set up earlier in the story and what that might be?

Our biggest questions in the story aren't about what will happen in the future but about what we might get to see that has already happened in the past.

There is actually no conceivable way to do The Finale without flashbacks because the entire story is built towards having at least a couple of essential ones happen in its end game. I would not be surprised if at least somewhere around a third of The Finale is set in the past. Are there ones that we would have had with a full season that will be cut? Yes, but, are there also ones, though, that are too essential to cut because the entire story for two seasons has been building towards eventually revealing them to the audience in the final part of the story? Oh, yeah. 😉

Guaranteed: 1941, Part 3. There is no chance that they cut this-- none. They have built the ending of this trilogy of flashbacks to support the ending of the story in the present so it has to happen. It doesn't need to be an entire minisode in length. Part 2 really did all the heavy-lifting with plot and themes here, and Part 1 was a single, brilliant, not terribly long scene. If Amazon reduced The Finale to 15 minutes long, I think the show would still find a way to put 1941, Part 3 in there. The first two parts were so pivotal to the themes and parallels of the story in the present and it's the only flashback that we keep getting installments of throughout the story so its Part 3 is going somewhere massive. If there's one flashback that's in The Finale, it's this one.

Extremely, extremely likely: the ancient times vavoom to which they have been building in clues and hints for two seasons that is going to flip the entire show on its head by going back to The Flood. It would parallel and add extra weight to all the conflicts we have in the story in The Finale that were set into motion by the end of S2-- the kiss, one of them leaving/them being separated, the threat of an apocalyptic-like event, etc.. It would, in almost no time at all, complete the narrative magic trick of the show by turning it inside out for the audience.

The show that shows everything backwards has been sitting on the real first kiss the entire time and saving it until the end game of the story and that end game is The Finale so expect that angel and that demon to be sheltering under a canopy from a rainstorm in the very long ago days and break the internet in the process.

If I were them, I'd even open The Finale with this flashback, just because of how much it's going to pull the rug out from under The Final 15. After all, the first two seasons opened with a canopy-and-rain-themed scene, did they not? Just one wing at a time, though... no under a canopy together yet. No gazing into each other's eyes and vavooming. That bit of the beginning of their story has always been going to be shown to us in the end of the story. It could well be the, well, beginning of the end of that story by opening The Finale. We'll have to see. Either way, it's in there.

It's also worth mentioning that both of these above flashbacks would be going back to eras we've already visited in the story so no time would need to be devoted to setting up the scenes. That would seem to make them easier to not cut, in addition to how narratively important they are.

Going To Be In There In Someway, Somehow: A flashback that sets up the South Downs Cottage ending, which is suspected to be the Jane Austen flashback because of her living in real life in the South Downs around the years that it was mentioned in S2 that Crowley and Aziraphale knew her.

When this was set up for S3 back in S2, the Jane Austen story felt juicy enough to potentially be a whole minisode in length. Maybe especially since it's probably how they are going to be build a history of the cottage between Crowley and Aziraphale to help give emotional weight to them going to live there in the present at the end of the story. I've no idea what this looks like with a shortened run time. They might abbreviate or maybe it was never even that long in the first place? They might do something different in its place? It's hard to say, since we don't know, but they've got to do something to set up the cottage, so...

Whatever this winds up being, though, we're now up to three flashbacks that have to happen because of how they connect to the story in the present in The Finale. These are three, non-negotiable ones, basically-- and we are obviously only looking at ones that we can see having been set up already.

There is also the fact that there's usually a surprise flashback that wasn't set up but which is crucial to the story, like the Job minisode was in S2. It fits in perfectly, retrospectively, but we were intentionally not really given enough in S1 to see it coming in S2 so that there was something unpredictable for us to enjoy. I'm not expecting anything as long as Job again but there could still be a scene more 1.03 Cold Open in length that we don't even know is essential at this point because we aren't meant to know at this point but, much like we did with Bildad 😊, we will see as vital to everything once we see it.

Including that as a possibility, we're now up to four flashback scenes that seem unlikely to be chopped from The Finale. What I just described, give or take and depending on the length of 1941, Part 3, is probably collectively getting within shouting distance of the run time of the 1.03 Cold Open-- and that's going really bare bones and only talking about the scenes that seem too story-essential to consider cutting. There's also one more that might meet that criteria...

Could Go Either Way: 1650. If this has nothing to do with Agnes Nutter, it's probably gone. If it's how Agnes has an appearance in the end of the story to pull stuff together, they'll probably find a way to put it in there because... Agnes. 😊

No one knows what this thing is supposed to be about but we do know that it was set up in S2 for S3 and, between Aziraphale mentioning it, the historical ties to eccles cakes to this era, the fact that it could potentially show a Whickber Street in early development and, most importantly, that it's set five years before Agnes Nutter died, whatever this thing is? It's intriguing. We don't know how long it was meant to be but if it's something that was minisode-length but could be reworked to be shorter-- or if just was always short in length-- it's probably still in there.

It's very possible to have many, quality scenes that hop throughout time in a very short period of time. The 1.03 Cold Open is about 23 minutes long and jam-packed with goodness. I have no idea if they're going to sprinkle flashbacks in throughout The Finale or if they're going to do a flashback sequence like 1.03/Ineffable Bureaucracy again but I do think that at least a third of The Finale-- so, roughly 30 minutes of it, give or take-- are likely flashbacks.

We are going into this movie a lot closer to the end of the story in the present than I think it may appear to some at this point. All the set up work to get the characters into place to overthrow The Metatron in The Finale was already done in S2. It's not going to take 90 minutes for Aziraphale to be in trouble, Crowley and Ineffable Bureaucracy to find out and rally the troops, everyone to challenge The Metatron, expose him as a fraud, and kill the threat of Armageddon by overthrowing Heaven and setting it up to be democratized. That's pretty much what everyone knows needs to happen in The Finale and what is likely going to be the main story in the present in S3.

We know what is going to happen because we know it has a happy ending and we know that we need the Armageddon threat gone for the South Downs Cottage happy ending to occur. We know the only answer is that they've got to overthrow The Metatron. Whether you think the plot is Supreme Archangel Aziraphale or whether you're like me and think the plot is that Aziraphale is in mid-fall as of the end of S2 and that's the thing that triggers the other characters to come together against Heaven, the end result is still going to be the same: The Metatron's gotta go and everyone's got to come together to make that happen if we're getting the happy ending we already know we're getting.

We are all sitting here knowing pretty much exactly what the story in the present is going to be in The Finale and that's because the story has set it up so that we do. Yes, there's going to be joy in watching that unfold but a story designed like a magic trick has to have suspense and give the audience a sense of anticipation. We feel that from this story and from where are we getting that?

The past. The flashbacks.

Everyone knows what the end of this story in the present is but no one knows for sure where, say, 1941 is going, or what new things about Crowley and Aziraphale the past will show us in The Finale. Every new thing we see in the past? Changes our view of the present. That's what makes the story clever. It's also what makes it enjoyable. They cannot cut flashbacks because they'd be cutting the most interesting parts of the story and what makes Good Omens the quirky, unique bird it is.

The present and the past are so interwoven in the story that I'm pretty sure that it is impossible to do Good Omens without flashbacks. The only question going into The Finale is which ones they're going to surprise and delight us with. Don't lose faith or sleep over it-- at minimum, we'll see Crowley's 1941 hat again and that, truly, is all any of us really need to survive.

#good omens #good omens meta #good omens finale #good omens the finale

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