#gonna run and hide now sorry bye

[ghost-proofbaby]

you showed me colors (eddie munson x fem!reader)

"YOU SHOWED ME COLORS YOU KNOW I CAN'T SEE WITH ANYONE ELSE."

summary: the soulmate au based on "illicit affairs" by taylor swift that almost no one asked for.

warnings: ANGST, HURT/NO COMFORT, MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, strategic use of pet names, allusions to sex but none described, reader is referred to as a girl a few times, no use of Y/N, canon compliant. not really edited (cause i'm not putting myself through this shit again).

wc: 15.1k+

a/n: im genuinely sorry for once. blame @abibliophobiaa and @breddiemunson for this. also, thank you @hellfire--cult for helping me with the header!!! please take all those warnings very seriously. please. (also shout out to ash who got her own divider sort of so she'd know when to stop reading because my baby doesn't like angst 😅)

The first thirteen years of your life, you only had second hand accounts to trust when it came to colors. 

The sky is blue, soft and dreamy, nearly translucent until grey wisps of clouds would overrun it on stormy days (although, the clouds, you could make out). Most grass is green, verdant and rich as it sprouts from the hard dirt. Even the yellowing strands are most likely gorgeous, a sign of life and death, a sign that someone once stood atop the green and held their ground. Roses come in a rainbow of shades, but everyone seems to adore the staunch red ones the best. The plush pink of a lover’s kiss-bitten lips, the warm brown fur of the dogs you passed by on the street, the deep violet of the plums your mother proclaimed as her favorite fruit. A range of colors you had only ever heard of, never experienced yourself. 

For thirteen years, all you had was stories. Nothing tangible, nothing solid in your palms. Mere crumbs of a promise of what you would have one day, when you met your soulmate.

When you met him. 

It wasn’t the most pleasant of circumstances in which you two met. You’d spent a lot of your childhood fascinated with the concept and lost in daydreams about it – maybe they’d be a stranger you caught the eye of on the train, or maybe they’d be the one making your coffee at a quaint cafe in a big city someday. Whoever they would be, you wanted them to be made of all the fairytales. You wanted a meeting to challenge every romantic story you’d been fed through your youth, you wanted a love that would shake the very Earth you wandered from the first time your eyes met theirs. 

Your reality seemed as far from earth-quake inducing as they could get, at the time. Looking back, though, you wish you could plead and change your youthful mind. Because the day wasn’t perfect, the situation was terrible shades of melancholy, but none of that really matters; what matters is that on that sunny Wednesday afternoon, you met him. 

Scraped knees. You had scraped knees, sitting embarrassed and frazzled beneath a tree as you tried to sink into the shade surrounding its base and erase the memory of what had just transpired. You could still hear all the other kids’ taunts echoing through your mind, cruel and unnecessary words that were suited to follow you the rest of your days. Comments on your looks and teases of things you couldn’t change. Seeds of insecurity that were hard to swallow at the beginning of your teen youth. 

You were still picking at the edges of your open wounds with slow drying tears still coating your cheeks when his shadow joined the tree’s. 

“Are you alright?” 

You looked up immediately to find a boy standing there. Your eyes had traveled slowly, taking in his baggy jeans with patchwork knees and his oversized faded t-shirt first. Even with the hand-me-down clothes, you could recognize his gangly limbs beneath it all. A frail frame and hunger-panged face. An overgrown buzz cut, no doubt prickly as the hairs stood to attention. Sunken in eyes brimming with concern for you. Whatever shade they were, they had to be dark; they were nearly black in the shades of grey your eyes could currently pick up on.

The thing about soulmates, is the colors don’t happen until you touch your soulmate. 

“I’m fine,” you stubbornly replied, wrapping your arms around your shins and tucking your knees beneath your chin despite the sting. 

“You don’t look fine.”

“Then stop looking.” 

He threw his hands up defensively, shrugging a bony shoulder, “Sorry.” 

He wasn’t sorry. Even with the wince that graced his face, he wasn’t sorry for checking in on you. You knew it the moment you caught the broken skin on his knuckles, nearly matching the cuts on your knees. You had fallen on the pavement as you’d tried to run away from the bullies, determined to not let them see you cry. The entire ordeal had been mortifying. You wished you would have just stood there and cried, let them hear your sobs and let them crown you the school’s newest crybaby. 

“What happened to your hands?” you sniffled, moving to wipe at your nose. Your cheeks were drier now, the skin nearly stiff where the tears marks remained. 

When you mentioned it, he suddenly shot his hands out before him, flexing each hand for emphasis as he looked down with boredom, “What? The cuts? Carver has sharp teeth, ‘s all.”

“Carver?” One of the kids who had just partaken in tormenting you. 

“Yeah,” the boy nodded, suddenly plopping himself onto the ground beside you. You flinched and he grimaced in a silent apology once more, “I think he was in the middle of saying something when I punched him, but that’s not surprising. He always has his big mouth open-” 

He was cut off mid-insult by a soft snort of laughter. Looking up, all of the previous annoyance at his injured knuckles melted away as he caught you fighting back your laughter. 

“What? I say somethin’ funny?” he was biting back his own grin, raising an eyebrow. 

You only laughed more, shoulders shaking now with entertainment rather than sobs. “I- Yeah, sorry, I just- God, you’re right. Carver does have a big mouth.” 

“The absolute biggest.”

“Bigger than the Atlantic ocean.”

His chuckling joined yours, along with a face splitting grin and eyes that you swore shone between the monotonous tones. “God, bigger than the fucking Pacific ocean. Every ocean, as a matter of fact.” 

You both leaned back against the rough bark of the tree, just close enough you could feel his heat through the summer air but not quite touching. Not yet. You let the back of your head thump against the trunk and tried to not think about any of the debris sure to end up in your hair. 

“So…” you sighed once the two of you composed yourself from your laughing fits, “I’m assuming you punched Carver?” 

He only nodded in answer.

“Can I ask why?”

Part of you wanted to assume that the two events were connected; Carver bullying you, and this boy punching him. But you didn’t want to make such a bold assumption about some stranger. Fellow peer or not. 

“Because he made fun of you.” 

The assumption wasn’t so bold. Your chest constricted, you remembered the sting of your knees, heard the echoes of the other students’ laughter at your fall once more. 

“You punched him just because he made fun of me?” you tried to force out a joking tone, as if it wasn’t a big deal, as if it wasn’t making your heart swell, “You don’t even know me.” 

“Doesn’t matter. He made fun of you,” the boy said with concrete decisiveness. There wasn’t a quiver of doubt to be seen, as if the logic made perfect sense to him. Your heart swelled more, painfully so. He looked down at one of his hands for a moment, before suddenly shrugging and rolling his head to look at you, sticking it out towards you, “I’m Eddie, by the way.”

A certain security blanketed the moment. This kid, Eddie, had punched a guy for making fun of you. You’d never even spoken to him before that day, much less would you have considered bruising your own knuckles for him. But he had for you. Without hesitation, apparently. Just some boy with a sliver of a gap still between his front teeth, a promise of freckles across the bridge of his nose, and blood on his hands as a reminder of your honor. 

Teachers were certainly going to be coming to find the two of you soon. There would be consequences, most likely more on Eddie’s part than yours, but that didn’t matter. There, in the shade of an oak tree of a middle school you’d soon be departing only to join the ranks of some awful high school with bigger and badder bullies, with larger and crueler problems than skinned knees, you had a friend. 

“I’m-” you started, reaching out your hand to meet his halfways. But you stopped, because the moment your palm met his, it happened. Suddenly, quickly, unexpectedly. It nearly gave you an instantaneous migraine; the flood of color was so overwhelming. 

The first color you saw was the soft, whiskey brown of his eyes. Two warm and comforting orbs, blown out to be as wide as your own, as his face echoed back the same shell-shock on your own. His eyes were brown. Not grey, not black, but something more, something russet. Brown. 

Colors. You were seeing colors for the first time. You both knew what it meant. 

“You,” he breathed out with a boyish grin, letting you catch the pink of the tip of his tongue as he finished your introduction for you, both of your excitement buzzing in the breeze, “are my soulmate.” 

—

Fifteen was the age of awkwardness. Thirteen had been awful, sure, full of changes and growth and such, but fifteen made it seem like a cake walk. 

You wouldn’t have survived it without Eddie. 

Two years into the friendship, the two of you were inseparable. You had always spent your entire childhood assuming that when you found your soulmate, it would all fall into place, romantically speaking. But then Eddie happened. Eddie, your soulmate, fell right into your lap and you realized all of your childish dreams were pale in comparison. 

He was your best friend first and foremost. Even if he hadn’t been revealed as your soulmate on that day, you have no doubt that the trajectory of your friendship would have stayed on this path. From the beginning, both of you decided to Hell with society’s expectations of soulmates. Sure, most people didn’t find their soulmates until later in life, when it made sense for the sparks of romance to fly instantly, but the adults still seemed to expect that when the news broke. Your parents had been concerned, Eddie’s Uncle Wayne had been weary, your teachers had been blatantly confused. 

It was fun for the two of you, though. The thrill of introducing each other as, “This is my best friend. Oh, also my soulmate, but, hey. Technicalities, am I right?” 

Most of the kids in your grade hadn’t met their soulmates quite yet, especially those first few years. A sense of superiority sprouted in both of you to be able to know, to experience, to lavish in a world of color. To have the weight of finding your better part lifted off your shoulders so soon in life. 

You and Eddie had an entire lifetime to figure out the romantic aspect of it all. For now, he was your best friend, and you were his, and that was enough. 

Once you two had entered high school, one thing did become very clear: the parading of being soulmates had to cease. 

Jason Carver had been enough of a menace in middle school, but grew into a fully formed monster once he joined your ranks in high school. People were not kind to Eddie – they hadn’t been in middle school, when he first moved to Hawkins, and they weren’t going to change their tune suddenly in high school. The bullying you had endured had begun to fade, but his age of torment had just begun. 

You never once left his side. It didn’t matter to you if the entire school knew you were soulmates or not. It didn’t even matter that you two were soulmates; he was your best friend, and you would be damned before you left him to battle the tides alone. 

“I hate this,” he mumbled as he sat on the toilet of his shared bathroom with Wayne in their trailer, you kneeling between his legs as you blotted at his split lip with an alcohol wipe, “I should have punched the asshole back.” 

“No, you shouldn’t have,” you scowled, furrowing your brows even deeper in concentration, “And stop talking – you’re making it worse.”

He opened his mouth to reply, but you quieted him with a glare. 

Just as you wouldn’t have survived the Age of Awkwardness without Eddie, he wouldn’t have survived it without you. 

You finished cleaning off the dried blood before tossing the wipe into the overfilled trash can, sighing heavily as you fell back onto the ground and supported yourself against the wall opposite of him. 

You leveled each other into a staring contest, eyes blankly boring into each other with emotionless expressions. 

“You’re lucky Wayne isn’t home, y’know,” you finally broke the silence, shooting a hand out to grab his ankle and give it a squeeze, “He’d probably be driving down to the school right now and-”

“Yeah, yeah,” Eddie waved you off, shaking his head, “I know. Trust me, I know. I think Principal Higgins is starting to hate him more than he hates me.” 

“Principal Higgins doesn’t hate you.”

“You’re right – he loathes me.” 

The hand that was squeezing his ankle quickly traveled up to his knee to slap it, “Eddie.” 

He raised his hands up in the air, lifting his brows for emphasis as he exclaimed, “What? You know I’m right, kid.” 

Kid. The loving nickname Eddie had adorned you with the moment he found out he was a mere six months older than you. You hated it, and he loved that you hated it. 

“The day you’re right is the day pigs fly, old man.”

Old man. The nickname that served as your attempt at a rebuttal. It didn’t work, not as intended. 

He chuckled softly at that, as he usually does when you call him that, and only smacked his palms onto his thighs, “Well, doc, I must say – you’ve done an exquisite job. Am I free to go?” 

You tried to fight your smile, tried to linger in the anger sparked from seeing Eddie hurt. Your disdain wasn’t directed at him; it was always a loaded gun pointed at whoever dared to lay a hand on your boy. You probably could have had a spotless reputation without Eddie Munson in your life, but you’d found your fists quick to fly in his defense. 

Your parents hated it. Wayne secretly adored it, even when he’d still join in scolding you and Eddie alike on avoiding violence. 

“Sure,” you shrugged, before grabbing his calves through denim to stop him. Dark blue denim, a deep shade of navy that you still hadn’t grown used to seeing. You hadn’t even realized jeans came in so many different shades until you met Eddie, and you’d always chastised him when he’d opt for a boring black pair, “But first, a payment is required.”

“A payment?” Eddie tilted his head, looking down at you curiously.

“A payment.” 

“And what would this payment be?” 

“A movie night,” you grinned wildly, finally letting your grip on him go, taking in the chestnut highlights of his curls and the red font of his t-shirt, a band shirt you’d never heard of but that he had recently gotten into, “Snacks provided by my loving host, you, of course.” 

He exaggerated his pondering, bringing a hand to his chin, stroking dramatically. As if he was ever capable of saying no to you. 

“Hm,” he hummed, his voice echoing through the tiny space and encasing you in warmth. As serene as that first summer day when he’d taken the leap of sitting down next to you in the grass, back to a tree, palm in your palm as colors had swarmed your vision, “I suppose that can be arranged.” 

—

Movie nights were a frequent occurrence. A sanctuary from the shit show of your small town. Sometimes, they had been the illusion of a bargain like that night, and others, they were an unspoken agreement. You’d show up to Eddie’s trailer or he would end up on your doorstep, your favorite candies in hand, and the two of you would just know. No words needed as you’d situate yourself on whoever’s couch, legs intertwining and blankets shared across laps. A bowl of popcorn that usually ended up being spilled inevitably. 

Movies were more fun in color. Some of your friends didn’t get it, still living in a world of black and white, but Eddie loved to listen to your rambles about how the vivid shades appeared across the screen. He loved the way your eyes would light up passionately, he loved how you still smiled so widely at special effects that were made more poignant by this gift the two of you had been given. 

Time. You two had been given the time most soulmates weren’t allotted. A gift you always thanked the Universe for. 

The latest Slasher film that had been released was currently displayed on the small television in Eddie’s living room, the two of you practically molded to the worn cushions of his sofa. Wayne had left within the first ten minutes for his shift, bidding the two of you a farewell with the warning of behaving. Vibrant reds splashed across the screen as one of the protagonists takes a stabbing, and while you should be shying away from the gruesome scene, you can’t help but stare in awe.

Even after years of experiencing colors, they took away your breath.

“Jesus,” you sighed wistfully, “How do they even make the fake blood? It’s so… so…”

“Red?” Eddie laughed from the other side of the couch, prodding at your thigh with his sock clad foot, “Probably food dye. Maybe some corn syrup.”

“It’s just so bright,” you eagerly leaned in closer to the TV, squinting with a wide smile, unaware of his stare. 

He was quiet for a moment, simply enjoying your joy. Your awe and wonder at the world, the way it seemed as if you two had just met that day rather than years before. As if colors were still a fascinating color to you. Eddie had grown used to them, let them become a part of his daily routine, but you always seemed to shine a new light on them for him. 

Around you, all the colors seemed a little bit brighter. 

“How do you do that?” he whispered so softly, it nearly got lost in the noise of the movie’s climax.

You hummed in response, eyes never leaving the screen. You were watching the movie in fascination, and he was watching you in serenity. 

His miracle. His gift. His soulmate. 

“You just…” he trailed off, no longer caring about the movie, “You always treat them like they’re brand new.” 

It caught your attention. The way his tone was so… velvety, so caring, so affectionate. You looked at him, “I treat what like they’re brand new?” 

“The colors.”

“Because they are.” 

The same assuredness as he used that very first day. As if it were obvious, as if it were simply a matter of fact and not such an endearing trait. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion and it only made his heart clench tighter. 

You were his soulmate. 

“We lived without them for thirteen years, old man-”

“Thirteen years and six months, in my case,” he piped up in interruption, wearing a Cheshire grin. 

You nodded and rolled your eyes, “Yes, in your case. Thirteen years, give or take. I just… I don’t know. They still… they still get to me. I don’t think I can ever get used to them. Are you?” 

“What? Used to them?”

“Yeah.”

He didn’t know how to explain it to you, not at that moment. How could he articulate to you that after so many years, the colors had dulled ever so slightly? The novelty had worn off, had run its course. The only time they’d ever become as vivacious as the first time was when he looked at you. 

He couldn’t. He couldn’t explain it to you, so he only shrugged, “I guess.” 

I guess, except when I see the color of your eyes, and I realize they’re my favorite color. Except when I notice the varied shades of your hair, and realize how lucky I am to see them in their full glory rather than shades of grey. Except when you wear that favorite mauve lipstick of yours, and I can’t get over the shape of your lips. Except when you wear that pretty red dress, and your confidence has my head spinning. 

I guess, except when it’s you. 

“Well, that’s just sad,” you huffed, focusing back on the movie after kicking gently at his shin. You lapsed into a comforting silence for a few more minutes, letting the movie fill the air. The same cycle; you watched the screen, he watched you, and the Universe watched both of you with a smile as it knew that the right choice had been made. The two of you were meant for each other. In this life. In the past lives. In the next lives. The two of you were the epitome of soulmates, even if the concept had never existed before. 

Thank the Universe it existed. Thank the Universe that he found you that day, below an oak tree, scraped knees and all. 

His voice shook as he quietly confessed, “I love you, you know that, right?” 

The movie faded in a blur for you instantly. Your neck could have snapped from how quickly you turned your attention to him. “What?”

“I love you,” his voice continued its waver, not from being unsure but from pure emotion. The flood of love that pulsed through his veins currently. 

You smiled, the apples of your cheeks punctuated and the chip in your tooth from your youth he hadn’t had the privilege of being apart of on showcase, “Well, yeah. Duh. I’m your soulmate. You kind of have to love me.” 

“Even if we weren’t soulmates,” he rushed to clarify, suddenly leaning forward and grabbing your knee beneath blankets that smelled of home, “Even if you weren’t my soulmate, I would love you.” 

Your face softened. He wished he would have kissed you in that moment. 

But the vulnerability was terrifying, and all that could echo through your mind is the fact that you two had time. So instead of matching his serious tone, you joked, “Well, it’s a good thing I am your soulmate, then. It might have been awkward for your hypothetically soulmate you would have had instead in that scenario, trying to explain why you love your best friend more than them.” 

“Shut up,” he laughed, squeezing your knee tighter, “I’m being serious, kid. I love you. I really, really fuckin’ love you. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” 

“You’re only saying that because I’m the reason you see colors.”

“Fuck the colors,” he was quick to reply, “The Universe can take back the colors, as long as I still have you.” 

There it is. The earthquake you dreamt of as a little girl. The trailer’s across the park never felt it, the kids surely getting into trouble in the forest behind Eddie’s home didn’t notice it, but you felt it. A rumble through your chest, a groundbreaking discovery, a world-ending confession. Your world began, and your world ended, and your world restarted with Eddie Munson. 

“You don’t believe me,” he noted, suddenly shimmying out from beneath the blanket.

“Wait, hold on-”

“Stay here.” 

You stayed frozen in your seat, wide eyes following his broad back and the army green of his t-shirt. No longer a frail frame, face filling out with puberty. He was becoming a man. No longer the young boy who took punches and threw them back twice as hard. 

He was becoming a man, he was your soulmate, and he loved you. He loved you enough he would give up what everyone else considered the greatest gift, just for you. 

Eddie Munson didn’t need colors to love you so ardently. And you knew, at that moment, that the same could be said for you. You would have loved him no matter what. The moment his shadow had spread over you beneath wide leaves and simmering heat, he was destined to hole up in your heart, never to leave again. 

By the time he had returned to the living room, you had paused the movie, eyes locked on where he emerged from the hallway with a polaroid camera in hand and a mischievous grin gracing his features. The camera had been a joint gift from your parents and his uncle the previous Christmas. 

Your eyes weren’t on the camera. They were on him. His hair had grown over the years, wild auburn curls finally surpassing his ears. The awkward style made for ridiculous bed head, something you’d been witness to many mornings after impromptu sleepovers. 

You were fascinated with the way the sunlight caught each strand as they bounced with his eager steps. The trace of gold you could outline. Shades of autumn you loved to run your fingers through when he’d offer the opportunity.

He shook the camera into the air for emphasis, finally catching your eyes’ attention, before he propelled himself back down onto the couch across from you, both of you sitting up instead of being reclined now. “Let me show you something.” 

“O-Okay,” you stuttered out, unsure. 

He fiddled with the camera for a few moments before he brought it up to his face, resting against his cheek as his eye peered into the small peephole. You were so busy memorizing him like that, that the flash of the camera took you off guard and effectively blinded you for a few seconds. 

“What the-” you started with a scowl, hands flying up to rub your knuckles into your eyes in a sorry attempt to rush away the stars blocking your vision. 

“Just wait,” he insisted, snatching up the polaroid the moment it printed from the camera. When you flashed him an unconvinced look, he continued on, “Trust me.” 

He didn’t have to ask twice. You always trusted him with your entire being, whether for better or for worse. 

The polaroid was slow in developing. Eddie hummed to fill the silence, occasionally fanning around the small capture of you that was slowly filling out in color rather than blinding white. You spent your energy on trying to decipher what song was stuck in his head and not focus on how slow those damned photos always seemed to be in coming to fruition. 

It had only been a few minutes, but it had felt like an eternity when you finally gave up on figuring out the song and succumbing to your impatience with a sigh, “This is the world’s slowest magic trick ever.”

Eddie rolled his eyes, but tossed you the camera. You thanked the Heavens for fast reflexes as you were able to catch it rather than let it fall to the ground. The two of you would have never heard the end of it if you managed to break such an expensive gift. 

“Hey!” you shouted as you clutched the camera tightly to your chest, “Be careful with this thing, Eddie. It’s fragile.”

His eyebrows raised from behind where he held up the polaroid he took of you to his face, “Is it? Can we really be sure that it’s that fragile if we don’t knock it around for good measure?” 

“We can,” you snappily replied, glaring down at the camera and fighting amusement, “If you want to throw it around, be my guest. But you’ll explain to Wayne why you broke it – not me.” 

“Of course, kid,” he grinned so wide that it spread to his cheeks peeking out either side of the photo still obnoxiously close to his face, “What else is a best friend good for? Basically signed up to be your permanent scapegoat until the end of time the moment I gave you the gift of colors.”

“And yet, I’m the one usually talking us out of trouble,” you dramatically called back, finally looking up at him and holding up the camera, “What am I supposed to do with this?” 

“I dunno. Break it, take a picture of me. The choice is yours, sweetheart.” 

He still hadn’t put the photo of you down, so you finally reached across the sea of blankets to yank on his forearms. Once you were faced once more with those warm doe eyes rather than the blank back of a photo, you narrowed your eyes at him in indecision. 

He was still smirking. Wide enough that his teeth just barely peeked out between his barely parted lips. You recalled the tales of kiss-bitten lips, the way you’d heard adults describe that deeper shade of pink, and for a second, you considered that it would look good on Eddie. Something about imagining him flushed and bruised by love and lust rather than malice made your gut twist stormily. 

“Picture it is,” you muttered, “Put that stupid polaroid down and smile for the camera, pretty boy.” 

“You think I’m pretty?” 

The camera went off mid-teasing, his dimples on full display and eyes shining wonderfully with the flash of the camera. 

“Nope,” you mumbled, “Just said it so you’d keep smiling.” 

It was a lie. A horrible, pathetic, and badly-veiled lie. 

The photos developed faster. Yours is finally in full color and detail by the time the two of you can make out the shape of Eddie in his, and he was quick to toss it to the side before he shoved yours into your lap. 

“There, look.” 

It wasn’t anything magnificent to look at. Just another photo. The same old color of your hair, baby hairs frizzing at the edges. Same old eyes fighting from crinkling in adornment at the boy before you. You weren’t anything special, not in your eyes. But Eddie’s expectant stare told you that there had to be something more there, something he was waiting for you to pick up on. You scoured the background of the photo for pops of color only to come up empty-handed. All you could find were the tired dark tones of the Munson’s furniture and living room behind yourself in the picture.

“Eddie, what am I supposed to be looking at?” you squinted, bringing the photo closer and trying to figure out the useless puzzle he had presented you with, “It’s just a picture of me-”

“Exactly,” he interrupted, “A picture of you. My soulmate. That right there,” he leaned over and plucked the photo from your hands, holding it up tauntingly just out of reach, “Is a picture of the girl I love. A picture of the one person who makes colors worth seeing, and makes colors worth losing.” 

The sentiment had you choked up. 

“You’re my favorite person,” his voice dropped to a whisper, and he held up his hand with his knuckles facing you as he put down the polaroid in his lap, “Have been since that very first day.” 

There was still a faint scar, right there, clear as day. It casted over the knuckles of his ring and middle finger as a permanent reminder of that fateful day. As if the colors weren’t enough, as if the swell of your heart inside your chest wasn’t enough reminder of the love and care you’d always felt pulsing from Eddie.

You reached out to the coffee table suddenly, picking up the photo of him, glad to see it finally developed. You didn’t even glance at it before you held it up to him, “And this is a photo of my favorite person.”

“You didn’t even look at the picture.”

“I don’t need to,” you breathed out, moving the picture out of your vision to look at him dead in the eyes, “He’s right here in front of me. In full color, treating me far kinder than I deserve.” 

His touch was ginger as he pinched the corner of the photo and took it from your grasp, placing it down atop the polaroid of you, “Don’t do that. You always deserve my kindness – you deserve the entire world’s kindness. I’ll kick the ass of anyone who argues otherwise.”

A soft and shy smile ripped at your lips, made the corners and your cheeks ache as you shrugged, “Whatever you say, old man.” 

He only looked at you, only wore the lovesick look of a man face-to-face with his soulmate.

The movie was long forgotten. All snacks carefully put on the table before Eddie threw the blanket off of the two of you and scooted backwards while leaving a space large enough for you between his legs.  

“C’mere,” he beckoned, motioning for you to crawl forward and fit your head to his chest as he wrapped his arms around you. He pressed you impossibly close to him, until your cheek was tight to his t-shirt and your ear was thundering with his racing heartbeat. 

You melted into him easily, letting your own arms encase him to the best of their abilities in this position. You took a few selfish moments to just be there with him, to just let his words sink in beneath your skin and the reality of them weigh heavy on you. The heavier it weighed, the further into his embrace you pressed. 

The warmth of serenity and peacefulness of the picture perfect moment nearly lulled you to sleep. But even in the drowsiness, you felt the kiss he pressed to the crown of your head. 

“I love you, too,” you admitted, muffled by his chest. You hoped he felt the words and wouldn’t teasingly make you look him in his eyes as you confessed, “I love you so fucking much. I couldn’t do this without you.” 

“Sure you could-” he began, but was cut off but the abrupt lifting of your head, just as he fingertips had started on a path down your spine.

“I couldn’t,” you insisted, “I really, really couldn’t. I need you to stick around for a long time, Munson. I’m not in the business of losing my soulmate until we’re old and grey and gross. I want to keep you around until I lose count of all your wrinkles and weird moles.”

He chuckled, and the force vibrated against your shoulder digging into his torso. 

You retrieved those two polaroids before you resettled against him, your back now pressed to his chest as you held the two snapshots side by side for both of you to look out. 

He was right. You think you get it. 

When you look at the photo of yourself, you see nothing extraordinary. But when you look at the photo of Eddie, everything just… the world seemingly stops, all moving parts suddenly snapping into place. A boy vibrant with color and glee, a boy who tugged on every heartstring you’d hung in your chest throughout your lifetime. It sent warmth to every crevice of you, from the top of your head where the ghost of his lips still lingered to the tips of your toes wiggling beside his within thick socks. 

It’s more than an earthquake or the world stopping. Eddie doesn’t just stop or begin your world – he is your world. 

A world of wild hair, charming smiles, unfiltered laughter and fierce adoration. Even the brightest shades out there that you had yet to discover were dim compared to the boy photographed in time for you. 

His arms slide around your shoulders, tugging you in even closer,“Just out of curiosity, what is your cap on wrinkles you can count? Because I’ve seen Wayne, and some photos of my old man, and let me tell you – time is not kind to us Munson men.” 

You rolled your head and pressed a kiss to one of his forearms before smashing your cheek into it, breathing deeply as his fingertips drew random shapes over the spot on your chest that your heart rests beneath. 

“As many as it takes, old man.” 

“Whatever you say, kid.” 

You brought a hand up to curl around the arm, right beside when you kept your cheek nuzzled. He finally laid his palm flat against your chest, and you wonder if he can feel the way each beat of your heart called out his name. It was okay if he didn’t – he had all the time in the world to figure it out. 

—

“I just don’t understand why you’re so mad!”

“I’m not mad, Eddie – I’m fucking pissed!” 

“Okay, then I don’t understand why you’re so pissed!” 

Seventeen is the age of being reckless and redundant. Of big feelings and reckless decisions. It is the time in your life for being an absolute idiot. 

Eddie Munson was proof of it as the two of you stood outside of his van, the whistle of the winds around you two from the impending storm lost on your current screaming match. 

“Figure it out,” you seethed, stomping your feet almost childishly as you began to turn away from him, “And while you do that, leave me the fuck alone.” 

“I- Hey!” he reached out for you, but you’re already quickening your pace and hopping up onto the sidewalk, “Hey! Don’t fucking walk away from me!” 

You didn’t reply, only widening your strides. 

He called out your name, and you heard his frustrated groan before he easily caught up with you. 

Damn him and his newfound height. 

“Would you just listen to me?” he shouted, latching onto your bicep and spinning you around harshly to face him.

You yanked yourself out of his touch quickly, eyes blazing, “Why should I? I’ve seen what I needed to see, Eddie. Just go back inside to your preppy girlfriend. Forget about me. Pretend like she’s never stood to the side while her boyfriend bullied you like- like- like some asshole.”

His hair was longer now. Ringlets that cascaded to brush over the top of his shoulders – shoulders that had broadened impressively as he neared the end of his youth. His newest clothing staple covered them; a denim vest you’d helped him distress and sew multitudes of patches onto, a display of his favorite bands that had only painted a new target onto his back. 

Satan worshiper. That’s what they called your soulmate in terrified whispers amongst the halls at school. That’s what all the PTO mothers’ eyes silently cursed when they’d see him with you at the grocery store. 

He’d made quite the image for himself. And you’d stayed by his side, defending his honor at every chance. Your best friend, your soulmate. 

Only to find him eating the face off of some cheerleader at that goddamned party. 

Yeah, you didn’t need to listen to him. You really had seen enough. 

“She’s not my girlfriend!” he waved his arms wildly, the storm roaring loader with his increased volume.

“What is she then?” you insisted with venom, crossing your arms and effectively closing yourself off from him as you took another step back, “Just some one night stand? Some fun to have before you have to accept that you’re shackled to me for the rest of your life?” 

You hated the way your eyes burned. You cursed the tears gathering as you glared at him viciously, masking all the pain with as much rage as you could muster. 

He wouldn’t even kiss you, his soulmate. But he would kiss her. 

“Stop putting words in my mouth,” he warned lowly, tone no longer making a spectacle of the two of you, “You know that’s not how I see it.” 

“You won’t even kiss me.” 

He was stunned into silence. As you spat out the words, the first few tears slipped.

It was about more than the pretty blonde girl you’d found him with. It was about more than the fact he was kissing someone else. 

“I… What?” he whispered, his entire body going slack with defeat. 

The tears fell more rapidly now as you replayed the moment in your head. The two of you were only at the stupid party for Eddie to deal weed from some weird guy he’d met in the arcade, a way to make extra cash. Cash he claimed he was putting towards your future together. You had no idea how you’d gone from sitting on the couch together to tipsy, joining a circle of fellow peers who momentarily forgot their cruelness between shots of whiskey and pours of vodka. 

You were going to hate the game of Spin the Bottle for the rest of your life. You were sure of it. 

When Eddie’s turn had arrived, when the neck of that dingy beer bottle casted shades of ambers in your direction, you had been so excited. Your heart had been in your throat, your head dizzy with the excitement of him finally kissing you. Your soulmate by Nature, your best friend by choice, finally would be kissing you. You had been so sure it was an affirmation from the Universe that the right choice had been made when it came to the two of you. That it was all real, and the colors weren’t a product of your delusion. 

And then he said no. 

“You wouldn’t kiss me,” you choked out, pulling your arms around your torso tighter to fight back any shivers or shaking, “The bottle landed on me, on your soulmate, and you wouldn’t even fucking kiss me. The one person you should have kissed. And you didn’t.” 

Eddie’s eyes widened in shock, a deer caught in your headlights, as he started to stutter out a sorry excuse. 

You didn’t want to hear it. You only threw your head back in bitter laughter, spinning on your heel and preparing to leave him behind once more.

“Wait,” he begged, grabbing your shoulder this time. 

You shrugged it off harshly, “For what? For you to make up some bullshit excuse for it? I don’t want to hear it, Eddie. I get it. I’m so sorry that I’m your soulmate. I’m so sorry you’re stuck with me. I’m so-” 

He cut you off by rounding in front of you, blocking your escape route and cradling each of your cheeks with determination as he forced you to meet his fiery gaze, “Stop putting words in my mouth! That’s not why I did it, okay? It’s not!” 

Your tears fell more rapidly, so quickly that his thumbs couldn’t have kept up with swiping them away if he tried. Instead, he let them puddle against his palms, focus solely on your eyes as he bore into them and whispered, “That’s not why I said no. And it’s not why I kissed that girl, okay? You’ve got to believe me, kid.” 

“Don’t-” you started, but he shook his head, determined.

“No, no. Hear me out. Please. You know I don’t see it that way. You- You’re- I’m not shackled to you. You aren’t some sort of damnation for me. Do you get that? You aren’t some life sentence or burden – you’re….” he trailed off, and you could see the tears gathering in his eyes. Constellations in his lashes to match your own. “I said no because I’m terrified. O-Okay? I said no to kissing you because… because… what if you’re the one shackled to me?” 

The crack in his voice reverberated through you. Aftershocks rattled your bones at his confession. 

“I- We haven’t crossed that line. And I just… if I crossed that line, and if you decided I wasn’t what you wanted…” his eyes searched yours for answers you couldn’t provide to him, not as your brows creased and your chest tightened, “If I kissed you and you decided that the Universe made a mistake, that I’m not actually your soulmate… I- Fuck, I couldn’t take that, kid. I couldn’t.” 

You’re no longer poised to run, to escape him and all the emotions drowning your lungs. You felt your shoulders drop, your defenses burned to ash as you stood with two solid feet on the quivering ground below you. 

There were a million reassurances on the tip of your tongue, but instead you only said, “Why did you kiss her?” 

The question that had pinned you as a flight risk. Because if what he told you was true, and you did believe him, then it didn’t make sense. Nothing that had happened that night made sense if what he said was true. 

“I don’t know,” he seemed even more confused than you, “And- God, I’m fucking sorry for such a shitty cop-out of an answer. But I just… I don’t know. I just did. She was there, and she kissed me, and I kissed back. I pretended she was you, like a fucking idiot.”

The honesty threatened to shatter you, but you decided it was better to hear his truth than risk being lied to. You could move past the anguish in both your eyes, the confusion and the hurt having brewed – you wouldn’t have been able to move past some half-assed lie in an attempt to save your feelings. 

“I regret it,” he whispered, “The moment I kissed her back, I regretted it.”

“Why?”

An opportunity to seal a bandage over the bleeding wound. A chance for him to make it all better. 

“Because she isn’t you. She isn’t my soulmate - she never could be. It’s you, and it was always going to be you, even if the Universe didn’t agree with me.” 

You took a moment to try and picture a world in which the man stood before you wasn’t your soulmate. A world where your palms touched, and your world hadn’t exploded in technicolor. Another Universe where the first color you had seen hadn’t been warm, brown, honey coated eyes. A twisted timeline where you hadn’t been awarded the gift of memorizing the red of his guitar, his sweetheart, or the calm blue tint his room bathed in every early morning. A world where you don’t know the shade his skin turns in during golden hour, or can’t see the way his few tattoos he’d gathered in the past year on his skin are actually a fading shade of blue-green rather than stark black. A world where you couldn’t pick up the Fruity Pebbles stuck between his teeth as he rushed to class late and you teased him mercilessly for it. A world without color - a world without the guarantee of Eddie Munson. 

A breeze roared by, and you could hear the Universe you were in whispering to stop it, to not do this. Because you weren’t living in a world without color. Your world had burst to life when your palm met his. You knew all the colors of his lifeline like the back of your hand. 

“It wasn’t worth it?” You knew the answer. You still needed to hear him say it.

And say it he did, nodding in confirmation, “It wasn’t worth it. She wasn’t worth it.” 

He could have left it at that and you would have offered him your forgiveness anyways. Even if the bond formed between you two didn’t feel like a shackle of chains binding you two together, you knew that there would always be an invisible string wound around your soul and connected to his. You could have spent longer being mad, you could have still walked yourself home and left him broken in the middle of that neighborhood street. But even if you did, you would have eventually found your way back to him. Whether you left in anger, whether you left in sadness, whether you left in mourning – your final destination remained the same. Him.

You may have all the time in the world with Eddie, but even a second spent upset with him felt like a second wasted. 

Not even forever felt like long enough. You knew that now, glaringly obvious by the chain of events the night had followed. 

And so he could have left it at that. And all would be well. Wounds would heal and time would soothe the ache that echoed. But he didn’t. 

He took a step closer. Took a shaky, deep breath. And then another step. One foot after the other until he was toe-to-toe with you as he breathed out, “You’re my future. You’re everything to me. Soulmate or not, you’re all I want. I want to grow old with you until I lose count of your wrinkles, and then some.” 

His chin tilted down, lips daring closer and closer to yours as your stare into his eyes refused to waver. 

Deep, deep brown. Endless, molten, a kind of comforting that says you’re home, you can rest now. How fortunate you were to see the twisting of lively carob and umber rather than lifeless greys. 

Your eyes tried to flutter close, but you couldn’t let them, not yet. Not until he was close enough to feel his breath on your chin before he let out a raspy, “Baby.” 

You folded immediately, took the plunge as your eyes finally shut and you pressed forward with fervent. 

It wasn’t like the movies. It wasn’t fluid and instantaneous. There was hesitancy and there was awkwardness, and your noses bumped one anothers hard enough to make both of you chuckle into the rarity of space left between your mouths as you both gasped in waves of air before returning to one another. His hand took its time before it grabbed your waist, and it trembled the entire time. Your arms shook the entire way they lifted until they wrapped around his neck and shoulders, unsure of where exactly to lay comfortably. 

But none of that mattered. Because he was kissing you – your soulmate was finally kissing you. And you had never kissed another soul before that night, but you knew immediately you’d never want to kiss another soul. 

It wasn’t like the movies or fairy tales, but it was enough. 

And you knew he felt the same way when the kiss was broken by the grin that split his lips just as the sky began to spit out the beginning of its inevitable downpour. 

—

You hadn’t heard from Eddie in three days. Which, fair enough. Finals season was nearly upon you two and you knew he had been stressed. Since the night of that party nearly a year before, you two had become even more inseparable if possible. You two had finally crossed a line, had finally accepted your status of soulmates, and no one would dare to demand the two of you detach from each other’s sides once you made the announcement that you were officially together. 

Wayne had worn a knowing smile. Your parents had simply warned Eddie to not hurt you (as if that was even an option for him at this point). Even Principal Higgins had offered a polite smile when he caught you two holding hands in the hallway, surprisingly not commenting on the public display of affection. You two were officially dating, officially succumbing to the status quo of what soulmates should be. 

Everyone had already sort of known there was something there between you two, but making it official removed any sliver of doubt any of them may have harbored. 

And so it was fine if Eddie needed space. It had been that way before your first kiss, occasionally learning how to stand as your own entities rather than solely a joint force, and it could continue to be that way after your first kiss. 

But after three days, you had started to worry. 

Pacing your room, you told yourself you were being ridiculous. This was fine. Space was good – space was needed. 

Space didn’t help with all your what-ifs, though.

What if he was hurt? What if he was sick? What if he was mad at you? What if the longer you gave him that space, the starcher of a revelation he would have that he didn’t need you? What if the two of you had flown into all of this too fast, too quickly, too soon? It may have taken years to get there, but what if Eddie suddenly decided the last year had been too much? 

You were in your car, driving recklessly down the streets that would lead to his house, before you could even think of another what if. 

If it was that last thought that crossed your mind, if everything between the two of you had become simply overwhelming for him, you convinced yourself it would be okay. It would be just fine, you could handle it as long as he told you as much to your face rather than hiding behind distance put between you. It remained a mantra spinning through your storming mind the entire drive; it will be fine. It will be okay. As long as he says it, I can handle it. Anything for him.

You never considered that one of the other possibilities was more likely. Not until you had your car haphazardly parked in front of the Munson’s trailer, fist banging on their front door before Wayne threw it open with tired eyes and wrinkles bunched in concern. 

“Is he here?” you breathed out in lieu of a proper greeting, breathless from your jog up to the damn porch from your car that you hadn’t even bothered with locking up.

It will be fine. It will be okay. As long as he says it, I can handle it.

Wayne understood immediately, stepping to the side as he nodded and motioned for you to come in, “He’s in his room. But listen, he got some news, and he’s not do-”

You didn’t hear the rest of Wayne’s warning, too busy storming past him and flying to Eddie’s bedroom door. You didn’t even knock, bursting through the door and already fighting tears as you geared up to hear Eddie say that he needed time and space, that he had gotten sick of you, that he wanted to experience more life before you guys really gave any of this a fighting chance. 

“Eddie, can you please tell me why you’ve just up and disappeared-” you cut off your plead the moment you laid eyes on him. 

He wasn’t facing the door. He was curled up in bed, back to you, clad in nothing but a t-shirt and boxers. You could see the stubborn knots that had built up in his hair, immediately keyed in on the way he was trying to collapse into himself. His knees were nearly buried in his chest, and if you squinted into the dark room, you’d see the outline of his spine beneath the flash of skin peaking out from where the back of his shirt had raised. 

It wasn’t just the state of him; the state of the room also immediately silenced you. 

Almost as if a war path had been torn through it days before, the bedroom was messier than normal. Eddie was never the most organized or pristine person, but he kept his living space well enough to… well, live. Kept the floor always within sight, tried to never let any collection of trash overflow on the tops of his dressers or desk. He even found himself emptying his ashtrays without your reminding most of the time. Usually, most of the clutter simply came from mountains of papers detailing campaigns or writing new songs, or different sets of dice being left out from planning said campaigns. A t-shirt here, a pair of ripped jeans there – sure. He was a teenage boy. It was expected.

It looked as though a level five hurricane had hit Eddie Munson’s room. 

Clothes strewn everywhere, dresser drawers thrown open and never closed. Beer cans collected across each surface and both ashtrays were overfilling with cigarette butts. You even spotted two half smoked joints on his bedside table. His sweetheart had been taken off of its wall mount and laid to rest on the floor. He would never have let his prized possession be discarded like that. Ever.

Your voice came out weak as you took a step closer to the bed, “Eddie?” 

You’re surprised he heard your whisper. He stirred, and your eyes followed the dust particles dancing in the single stream of sunlight that was bursting through a hole forgotten in his makeshift curtains. Navy blue sheets the two of you once used to make a pillow fort in the Munson living room, thinned to the illusion of a sky blue in some patches.

You’d always warned him they make shit curtains; he’d always shrugged and said it added to his feng shui. 

“Eddie,” you whispered again, knees knocking against the edge of the mattress as you looked down at his broken form, “I… What happened? Are you… are you okay?” 

You hadn’t known how to approach it. Whatever happened was even worse than the first time he’d received a phone call from his dad in prison. 

He mumbled something against the pillow he has one arm curled under.

“What?” you questioned, nearly ready to climb into that damn bed and force him onto his back, force him to look at you if only so you could guarantee there were no tear tracks on his cheeks. 

You don’t have to, though. Eddie finally loosened his grip on that pillow and rolls ever so slightly, just enough for you to see half his face and feel your heart break at the confirmation of tears. Translucent pink eyes, glossy wet cheeks, the tip of his nose glowing as his gaze met yours. He looked tired.

“I’m getting held back,” he croaked, “I fucking- I flunked. I’m not graduating.” 

You nearly sighed in relief. For his sake, you don’t, but the weight on your shoulders lifted immediately. 

“Oh, sweet boy,” you murmured, giving into the need to crawl into the bed. You folded your knees as you situated yourself on the bed behind him, and the moment you’re situated, he wasted no time twisting himself to face you and bury his face into your side, “Why didn’t you call? You had me losing my goddamn mind-“ 

A strangled sob rattled against your side. One of his hands gripped your thigh, fingertips holding on for dear life, “Because your soulmate is a fucking loser.” 

Your chest cracked further, a valley beginning to form as a hand buried into the back of his head, holding him to you as the other hand moved to rub his back in soothing motions.

“My soulmate is not a fucking loser,” you tried to keep a gentle tone rather than scold him at the moment. He didn’t need scolding — he needed patience, he needed care, he just needed you to be there, “Keep talking about him that way, and I’ll have to get the fighting gloves.” 

He wetly laughed into your t-shirt, and you were sure that there would be tear stains when he finally lifted his head, “I’m the one who taught you how to throw a punch, baby.” 

“Exactly. Which means I’ll have you on your ass in ten seconds flat.” 

It was a few minutes of silence that followed; just you holding him, just him clinging onto you. His life line — his single ship of hope in what had been a terribly rocky sea the last few days. An irreplaceable peace settled across all the wounds and damage that had been done in private. You had been right. He should have called you immediately. He should have known that if anyone could make the situation feel less like his world was ending, it was you.

His soulmate.

“Do you want to talk about it?” you questioned in a soft, lulling tone. The endless patterns you’d drawn on his back had nearly put him to sleep, “Maybe be a bit kinder to yourself this time?”

“I just…” he started, finally removing his face from being buried against you, “I sort of had a hunch. O’Donnel wouldn’t round my grade, you know? And I’ve skipped a lot of classes, I know. But hearing Higgins say it just… just…”

“Made it real?” you offered a weary ending to his sentence.

“Yeah,” he nodded, “Real. It made it really fucking real.” 

He didn’t feel judged at that moment. He felt seen as you continued on, “It is real, and it sucks. But it’ll be okay, Eds. I mean, I was already planning on the community college for my first year, maybe even taking a year off. If you need any help with classes, you just gotta ask me. Don’t forget I was one of O'Donnell's pets, as unfortunate as it was. I know how to work that woman into rounding up some grade.”

You rambled on a little more, all the while still stroking his hair and back, offering even more solutions. The longer you spoke, the better Eddie felt. You made it all sound so easy — like this was nothing, like it was the smallest of blips in plans that had been years in the making. You weren’t upset, you weren’t disappointed. He deserved your negativity, and instead only received your optimism.

You were with him for the long haul, he realized. Truly. It wasn’t just some one off promise or chain of the Universe holding you to him. He wasn’t dragging you down.

When you finally trailed off, his lids finally heavier than his heart, he sighed, “I love you. You know that?” 

“I love you,” you smiled, “That’s kind of part of the soulmate package, isn’t it?”

“Fuck the soulmate part,” he lifted out of your hold despite everything in him screaming to stay put, to let you to continue to coddle him, “I’ve seen plenty of people be shitty to their soulmates. I watched my dad-“ he cut himself off, throat tightening with memories of his parents. You don’t make him finish that sentence, only nodding in understanding, “The Universe doesn’t force you to be a good person. You choose to be that. Every single day, you choose to stand by my side. You always have. You could have made me feel shitty about this, could have let me see how bummed you really are about sticking out another year here, but…” 

But you didn’t. 

Your eyes softened, a stormy shade of his favorite color, “Do you remember the way you punched Carver that day, before you even knew me?” 

That very first day. The day two souls destined to intertwine had come in contact. The day the Universe had sighed in relief as your palm met his.

He nodded.

“You didn’t have to do that,” you whispered, “You didn’t even know me. And yeah, whatever, maybe the Universe nudged you to do it, whatever. But there’s tons of people who know their soulmates for years and never realize it. Tons of people go to school and never interact with their soulmates. But that very first day… the first day you were at that school, the first day you saw me — we met. You defended me. And that counts for something. And I like to think it speaks more about us than it does about the grand scheme of things,” you brought a hand up, wiped away whatever tears were left on his cheeks with enough tenderness he almost started to sob again, “You didn’t know I was your soulmate. I was just some random classmate, and you defended me without even thinking about it. And I will always do the same for you. Always.” 

You always had, you always will. The two of you had proven, time and time again, that you will always choose one another. It was never about that inevitable bond. 

“I don’t deserve you,” he confessed, quickly moving to keep your palm there, resting on his stubbled cheek, “You deserve a soulmate who isn’t a fuck up. Someone good, someone who can give you the world and someone who… who isn’t repeating another year of fucking high school.”

“You still don’t get it,” you grinned sadly. Your fingertips press into that soft spanse right before his ear, cradling him more urgently on their own accord, “I don’t want or need someone else. You do give me the world- you are my world, you idiot.” 

Idiot sounded perfectly aligned with lover as he leaned forward, burying his face in your neck. Home — he was home as you wrapped your arms back around him, pulled him a little closer in your embrace, clung to him as tightly as he clung to you. 

All the colors in the world, and the only ones the two of you cared about were the ones confined to that small space for the time being, shades of you and shades of him, all overlapping perfectly in sync. 

—

You stay true to your word. The first time Eddie repeats his senior year, and the second time. 

Endless nights are spent studying, you forcing him to focus when he couldn’t, trying to invent new ways to learn that work for him rather than against him. He’s brilliant; you never let your boy forget that. 

It’s nice for a while. Sickly sweet kisses and teasing exchanges. Enough lovesickness to make even those around you two nauseous. Nights spent out by Lover’s Lake, exchanges of promises of a future to come and discussions of whether your kids will have his eyes or your eyes. Kids. You two were discussing fucking kids. And it had scared Eddie half to death to even bring it up, but you hadn’t been phased. You’d answered terrifying question after question with ease, had even joked about what color flowers the two of you would have at your wedding and listened to Eddie describe the house he’d want to grow old in with you in excruciating detail. Sometimes the two of you even brought up what kind of dog you’d have, fantasized about the big yard which would not have a white picket fence (because, according to Eddie, that shit was too cheesy even for him in all his adoration for you). It made Eddie realize that after all these years, maybe you had become the brave one.

You’d both succumbed to the stereotypical soulmate trope. Become exactly what society had expected from the two of you since the beginning. And honestly, you couldn’t even be mad about it. You get it – you got the allure as you had laid with a head pressed to Eddie’s chest, observing all the stars again, a night sky the vision of black and white as your vision went blurry with fatigue. 

“You know, that house sounds awfully expensive,” you yawned, curling a bit tighter into his side. You’re in nothing but his t-shirt, his chest still bare from the night’s activities.

Another new development. Even after all your time together, you two continued to find novelty to explore. New ways to learn each other, new ways to love each other, new ways to further tie your two souls together. An unbreakable knot. If anyone, the Universe included, tried to loosen it, you would spill blood without second thought. 

“Oh, it absolutely will be,” he chuckled, vibrations echoing in your eardrum, “But that’s fine. We’re going to tap into that rockstar money, baby.” 

In between talks of the future, more honest versions had arisen. Eddie and his band. You and your aspirations. Things that neither of you laughed at quite as much as the talk of children or houses with wraparound porches because they were in reach. 

“Do you think you’ll have groupies?” your voice was a murmur, mouth half pressed into his skin as you lazily traced circles on his pec you aren’t using as your own personal pillow. 

It made him chuckle once more, “Groupies? Sure. Don’t think any of them will be very successful, though.”

“Bold of you to assume I meant just you,” you’re able to snark back even half asleep, “Gareth deserves to be fawned over, too. Jeff is definitely a ladies killer.” 

Your hand moved just fast enough out of the way for Eddie to lazily mimic stabbing himself in the exact muscle you were painting invisible imagery across, “You wound me, sweetheart.” 

From this angle, you could catch the exact shade of brown that his faded freckles shone. You could see the differences in tan skin, see where he’d left a pair of sunglasses on his chest during a lake day over the summer and the tanline had remained stubborn. That had been a good day – Eddie had thrown you off the dark, wrapping his arms around you and turning the world to a blur of passing greens and blues before you’d been dunked beneath the lake’s surface. The cold water had stunned you, but him joining you seconds later hadn’t. Always by your side, even when he was being a little shit.

You’ve gone quiet on him, mind overcome with fond memories as the silence came naturally only for a few seconds before Eddie felt the need to fill it again. 

“What are you thinking about?” he asked, the hand that had mock-stabbed himself now curling around your forearm. 

Your hand against his chest turned to a fist, pressing deeper into the skin, just to feel him closer, before you teased him, “How do you even know I’m thinking? What if my mind is just blank right now?”

“Psychic-soulmate-telepathy powers,” he answered without hesitation. When you only huffed, clearly unimpressed, he pressed a kiss to your temple before whispering in honesty, “You were smiling.” 

You took a deep breath, closing your eyes. Usually, you loved memorizing all the colors of him. You loved taking in his doe brown eyes and the harsh blush of his swollen lips. You’d memorize the twinkling of pink staining his skin across his chest and up his neck. You’d pick at the vibrant cherry shade of his painted nails, a sharp contrast from the usual black or sharpie scribbles he’d wear on them instead. 

That silver glint of his rings. The forest green of his plaid boxers. All shades in the palette of Eddie Munson, your soulmate. 

You love him so much, your chest is ready to burst from it. And you told him as much, too.

“I’m just really glad I have you,” you said for only him and only the trees to hear, “I’m really happy you came after me that day.” 

There’s no rush to memorize all his colors and all his shades. You had all the time in the entire world, and then some. The only reason anyone had ever reported losing their colors was due to the death of their soulmate, and he wasn’t in any danger at the moment. He was there, sturdy beneath you, deep breaths syncing with your own. 

If you didn’t learn them in this life, you wouldn’t rest until you found him in the next to finish what you had started. 

“Yeah?” you could hear his grin as he held you a bit tighter. Another deep breath, another expansion of his ribs, and you feel all that time laid out at your feet. A lifetime of learning and memorizing Eddie Munson. A life well spent, “I’m glad, too.” 

“Did you have even a single moment where you…. I don’t know, hesitated coming after me?” your speech began to slur, and you knew you were one foot in unconsciousness at that point. 

“Never,” that same certainty he has always held since day one laced his tone, “Never. I just- I went for it. I made Jason Carver eat his words, and I ran after you. The only thing I’ll ever regret is not throwing a second punch at the asshole.”

Your smile widened, and you knew he felt it. Imagined the comfort he felt at the feeling. Imagined the peace that was washing over him just as it encased you, “But not about coming after me?” 

“I don’t regret coming after you,” he told you, not growing the slightest bit annoyed at your need for constant reassurance. His fingers and palm slowly spread across your lower back, the warmth of their weight carrying you into sleep, “I’ll always come back to you, baby.” 

—

It wasn’t supposed to go this way. 

Spring break was supposed to be nice. Time spent with friends, lazy mornings that you and Eddie slept through, night drives spent screaming out in relief to empty highways because he made it – you both made it. The college transfer was already put into motion, making it so you’d start the fall semester at a University in upstate Indiana. Eddie had taken a few roadtrips with you at his side, already having gotten on the good side of a boss at one of the car shops within range of where you’d be attending. You two had littered his floor with ads for apartments, the ones in your price range circled in brilliant and glaring red. Everything had been perfectly in line. Everything was set in place. Spring break was supposed to be a break to just be kids one last time – it was supposed to be nice. 

But then Chrissy Cunningham happened. And Jason Carver, and an entire town of people who had always hated your soulmate. Suddenly, your own plan for the future had been scrapped, and in its spot a line of new dominos had been placed. One falling down after the other, too quick for you to keep up with.

A group of strangers had banged down on your front door. Had demanded to know where Eddie was, claimed they were friends trying to help him. You hadn’t even seen the news yet. They’d tried to fill you in, but only confused you more in the process, because the words Eddie and murderer should have never been used together in a sentence in the way they claimed the entire town was currently spewing. 

You were his soulmate. They were sure you’d know where he was, but you didn’t. 

That didn’t matter, though. The young boy, Dustin, had been determined. You’d heard all about him from Eddie – about the brilliant mind hidden beneath baseball caps and unruly curls, about the smart mouth you witnessed mouthing off to Steve Harrington first hand as you’d been searching for your boy. 

It reminded you of Eddie. It made you ache. It made you only more voracious in your search. 

And you’d found him – terrified, alone, trembling and crying. A version of him you’d never been privy to had pinned Steve fucking Harrington to the wall of Reefer Rick’s boathouse with a broken bottle to his throat. Wild, scared eyes and hands that shook harder than the day his father had called him and he���d put a goddamn hole through his kitchen wall. More desperation on his face than the day he’d informed you he’d be repeating his senior year for the first time. Shoulders more tense than the night you’d nearly walked away from him over some silly kiss with a cheerleader. 

When he saw you, he’d shattered completely.

The sight of you had him collapsing into your arms, unable to explain himself in full sentences as he gasped and panicked and clung to you. And you had held him, had forced the others to give him time. You were like a feral animal, standing between him and them, friends or not. Your claws and teeth alike had been out, ready to mar anyone who would dare to lay a hand on your soulmate. 

He’d calmed down. He’d explained. And then they had explained and reassured Eddie that he wasn’t crazy. His eyes had found yours over and over, and not a single time did they hold a single doubt for him in them. You believed him; you would always believe him. The cries of the town had been nothing more than static noise. You knew the man before you, you loved the man before you. Your soul knew his intricately, intimately. It would always know him, no matter the circumstance and no matter the troubles to come. In this life and the next.

The colors were never the gift. The gift the Universe had offered you had always been him. 

You stayed with him those short few days. Ran from Carver and his posse, swam in the lake and had kept a level head as you formulated a plan. Find a walkie-talkie. Call for Dustin, call for help. 

When the rest of them had jumped into the lake after Steve, you’d put a selfish hand on his bicep. For a moment, the only thing you were thinking of was him. You couldn’t lose him. 

When he jumped in after Robin and Nancy anyways, you’d followed, no hesitation. 

A dreary, nightmarish world. You’d followed him into Hell – quite literally, it seemed. Except they didn’t call it Hell, they called it the Upside Down. A place made up of all the things children fear, of awful creatures that only served to attack, to kill, and terrible storms of flashing red lightning. A blue tint to the town you’d come to know. Shades of flesh and shades of grey – shades of death – flooded the place. And only you, Eddie, and Nancy could see them. 

Nancy’s soulmate was somewhere far away. Somewhere safe. But she understood that protective stance and the way you’d stuck staunchly at Eddie’s side. She got it. 

A stolen RV, shields made of trash can lids and nails rather than make believe, goddamn spears made at the hand of people all far too young to be handling these things. They were handling the end of the world, and you suddenly hadn’t felt as brave as Eddie always claimed you were. The plan was formulated, and the entire time, you had a sinking feeling in your stomach. You watched Eddie play fight with Dustin, real weapons discarded to the ground, and you listened to Robin whisper the same sentiment to Steve. 

“I just have this terrible, gnawing feeling that… it might not work out for us this time.”

You agreed with Robin. You hated that you agreed with Robin.

And so you stood like a watch dog at Eddie’s side, nearly lashed out when it was suggested you might be more helpful joining everyone else going after this Vecna rather than staying with Eddie. 

It was his turn to put a hesitant hand on your bicep. Brown, russet, umber eyes that flashed with the unspoken question of are you sure you want to do this? 

But he was sure. And just as quickly as you’d followed him into that lake, just as quickly as you had dismissed those awful claims against him, you’d nodded. Because if he was sure, if he was going through it, you would follow him. 

You should have insisted on staying with him and Dustin. 

Because your group of rag tags re-entered that Hellish landscape, and you flinched with each flash of red, not even soothed by Eddie’s hand in yours. And the people around you were now friends; you’d realized in a few short days that you would do almost anything to protect all of them as well, but you knew there was nothing that you wouldn’t do to keep Eddie alive. 

“Hey,” he insists once the two of you stand outside this alternate version of his trailer, somewhere that you should know all too well but that has morphed into something unfamiliar in this world. 

His hand holding yours spins you to face him, a few steps off to the side from the rest of everyone. 

“Hi,” you whisper back, trying to only focus on him. Not the bleak colors of the landscape around you two, but the vibrancy of his shades. You hate the weakness written all across your features, unable to offer him any reassurance in return for all that he had given you over the years. You were terrified. As Robin had said, a terrible gut feeling was gnawing at you from the inside out. You couldn’t help the tears gathering, couldn’t unravel the restriction of your throat. 

“It’s going to be okay, alright?” he does the talking, nodding and lowering his chin to stare right into your eyes. His favorite color now wet with emotion, shining even in the dullest of environments, “Can’t be worse than punching Jason Carver, right?” 

It could be. It could be much, much worse. Everything you two had endured together was children’s play compared to this. But you don’t say that; you nod in dishonesty, biting your lip to stop from letting a whimper escape. 

“I’ll always come back to you, I promise,” he swears so vehemently, voice spitting with determination. Those brows half hidden by the bandana atop his head furrow, his forehead nearly brushing yours.

That, you at the very least, believe. Just as you would find him every time, in this life and the next, he would find you. 

“You better,” you choke out, hands reaching up just to latch onto him one more time. To feel him, sturdy beneath your palms. Alive. Your gift from the Universe, the boy who let you see colors. You almost regret spending so long fascinated with the shades you’d discovered when you should have allotted more time to imprint the features of his face to memory. You should have cared more about that freckle beneath his right eye, the slight crook to his nose, the way each of his calluses feel against your bare shoulders. Shades of blue, red, green, violet, yellow – none of them matter as much as the boy before you. They only matter because they paint the picture of him for you fully. They only matter because he matters, “I still need your rockstar money to pay for that wraparound porch.” 

He laughs at that. And God, he’s gorgeous – his head thrown back, eyes crinkling with genuine joy for the first time in days. No one else catches the tear that slips from one of those pinched eyes, the hidden sadness for only you to catch onto. 

That gnawing feeling – the one you and Robin felt. He felt it, too. 

“Of course,” he finally sighs, opening his eyes back to yours and now holding so many words that neither of you have the time to exchange. It kills you – you don’t have time. You thought you’d always have more time. “Think of this as a test run for that rockstar money. See how a crowd of bats feel about my rockstar skills.” 

“Careful,” your voice cracks, a few tears slipping that he’s quick to swipe away, “I hear they’re a tough crowd.” 

He smiles at your joke, but doesn’t waste his breath on laughing. His lips find yours instead, pouring out every single thought and emotion possible. You feel a tug on that knot you’d tied between you two, everything in your being protesting from pulling back from the kiss. You try to move your lips in a response, to tell him it’ll be fine, to tell him you’ll both return to each other. To tell him you’ll have more time. 

When he pulls back, realizing you can’t, his hand falls from you only to reach into the pocket of his jeans. You don’t understand until suddenly, he’s thrusting a laminated square into your hand. 

You know what it is before you even turn it over. Your entire body strangles down the broken sob as you look down at a polaroid of a younger Eddie. Somewhere safe and somewhere that time is still yours. 

“Keep that safe for me, yeah?” his voice wavers as he produces his own polaroid – the picture of you, “I mean, I’ll have yours, obviously. But… but just… it’s gonna be worth a lot of money once I’m the next big thing in the Upside Down.” 

He’s trying so hard to make you laugh just one more time. It only surges more tears to burn your vision. 

“All I’ll have to show Vecna is this,” you start to joke back, letting more tears stain your cheeks, “And- and-” 

You can’t finish the joke. He gets it, putting a hand over yours, forcing you both to put away those polaroids. 

“I know,” he assures you, “I know. Show him my ugly mug, and he’ll go down without a fight. That’s exactly why I’m giving it to you, baby.” 

Another tear, only for you, slips. You trace it all the way down his cheek, memorize the way his skin looks in the horrid blue tint and try to remember the shade it glows during golden hour instead. 

“I love you,” you say. But once isn’t enough, “I love you.”

“I love you,” he takes your hands in his palms, finally presses his forehead to yours, shares his breath for a moment as he focuses on your sad eyes, “So fucking much. You always were prettier than all the colors combined. Better stay that way till I come back to you.” 

He releases you. Wipes away his tears, has to give you an encouraging shove on your shoulders to force you to join Nancy and Robin’s sides. 

Steve catches your eye, a look on his face telling you he’d been watching the entire interaction. Something yearning crosses his features, and then something clicks. As if this is the first time he’d ever witnessed soulmates. As if he’s the one seeing colors for the first time. 

Maybe that’s why he gives his little speech. Maybe that’s why he tries to plead your case and make sure that Eddie and Dustin don’t do anything stupid. 

After Eddie has made his final request to Steve, to make him pay, he looks at you one last time. A ghost of a grin, wearing his bravest mask to date as he mouths I love you. 

You echo the silent sentiment. A silent prayer. For the Universe to bring him back to you. To bring you back to him. 

—*ash, stop reading here*—

The only way to lose your colors is if your soulmate has died. It’s one of the first things you learn when school first broached the sensitive topic. Your soulmate dies, they take the colors with them. They never told you how the soulmate takes the colors with them – never discussed whether it would fast and sudden like the moment you first touched your soulmate, if the colors would drain from you in real time and leave a path of chromatic grey behind, or if you’d watch them flicker from sight, just as one might watch the life flicker from the eyes of the one they loved.

You’d always wondered how it happened.

You’d been morbidly curious that day in class despite finding it all a bit dramatic. Had looked around a black and white classroom and processed your classmates' different greyscale reactions. Some were forlorn, some were snickering beneath their breath. Some just looked plain bored. It made sense; you were all kids, none of you had ever seen the blue sky or the verdant grass. Only heard about it. Only listened to adults drone on and on about it wistfully. It was never something tangible, something to have and to hold and to lose. 

You wonder how younger you would have looked upon you now. As you faced down an alternate dimension’s fiercest villain, hand paused midair, prepared to launch a lit molotov cocktail with aim to kill, when you suddenly paused.

The shades of the fire burning brightly in front of you have dulled. Microscopically. The smallest of flickers in vibrancy. 

“What are you doing?” Steve screams when he notices your hesitation, “Throw it! Jesus Christ, throw it before-”

Robin cut him off, being the closest to you and reaching over to snatch the ticking time bomb of a bottle, tossing it for you. 

As it explodes against the mangled being before you, another flicker occurs. You swear you feel a stabbing pain in your side, as if that gnawing has taken to ripping you apart.

You swear the bright flashes of yellow amongst the flames have turned to white. The orange has gone so faded, the dullest bits have shadowed over in grey. 

Nancy takes another shot, but you can’t move. You watch it all in slow motion: she doesn’t miss, her shot ricochets dead center, Vecna stumbles before crashing through the wall behind him. 

The world flickers a final time, and all the air leaves your lungs. 

It’s black and white. 

The floorboards, all of your sudden friends beside you, the walls of the old house, the lightning flashing amongst storm clouds in the sky outside.

It’s black and white. Shades of grey monotone. 

As everyone rushes to look out the hole, your knees collide with splintered wood. 

The colors are gone. It’s black and white. 

“Where’d he-” Steve starts to question before he turns and sees you. You’re folding into yourself, no longer breathing as you look down at your palms. Grey. Not a single sliver of flesh tone to be seen. “Are you okay?” 

The colors are gone. 

A cold washes over you like never before, and even if you wanted to take another breath, you couldn’t. It’s not ash burning your eyes – it’s tears, hot and vicious as your face begins to crumple in panic. 

Eddie. 

You don’t even hear them cross the room back to you. Can’t hone in on what’s happened, if the evil has been defeated and if you’d all won. It doesn’t matter; your colors are gone. 

Your hands finally fumble without thought, patting down your person until you catch the corner of the polaroid. You yank it free, breaths finally strangling into your throat without purchase, your shoulders shaking.

It’ll be in color. It has to be in color. He has to be in color. 

That familiar and well loved photo stares back at you. Your boy, curly hair wild and unruly, grin soft and fond. A twinkle captured in his eye and all that adoration that had been rolling off of him in waves somehow frozen in time. 

Frozen in time, frozen in black and white. 

Steve shakes your shoulders, Robin begins to pace and match your panic. They don’t understand. 

Gritted sobs leave your mouth, tears blinding you as you look at the shadow of what must be Nancy.

She understands.

Even through the strangled breaths, earth-shattering sobs that make you nearly incoherent, she knows. 

“Eddie,” you manage to gasp, fist curling around the photograph. 

The only way to lose your colors is if your soulmate has died.

“Eddie,” you manage a mangled sob as Steve pulls back, horror-stricken as he looks down at the polaroid, slowly piecing together what was happening.

Fast and sudden like the moment you first touched your soulmate. Draining from you in real time and leaving a path of chromatic grey behind. Flickering from sight, just as one might watch the life flicker from the eyes of the one they loved.

“Eddie!” 

You’d always wondered how it happened.

You finally had your answer. You wish you didn’t. 

[bkgml]

sleeping on katsuki while he works!

katsuki liked to jump the gun on a lot of assignments, he’s not a slacker. so when aizawa announced a final assignment before graduation, you bet your ass he was going to finish it the day it was announced.

he locked himself in his room after school, even though you were whining that you wanted to spend time with him.

the next time you saw him was dinner, he came downstairs to eat with you before heading back up to his room.

“bye, sweets. ‘m gonna go back to work.” he kissed your cheek.

“wait!” you ran up to him and held his hand.

“can i sit in your bed until you’re done? wanna sleep in your room.”

he thought about it.

“alright. if you make a bunch of noise you’re getting fuckin kicked out.”

“deal!”

the two of you walked to his dorm, hand and hand. as you entered his room you ran and jumped on his bed, getting comfy in the sheets with your phone.

“if you’re going to watch something with sound, use my headphones, kay?” he went to sit in his desk chair.

“okay.” you said, grabbing his headphones from his nightstand.

he worked for a couple more hours, driven by his motivation to be the best.

you were getting sleepy though and wanted him to hold you. you didn’t think he’d work for this long.

katsuki assumed you were already asleep, surprised at the lack of noise coming from his bed.

you took his headphones off and stood from the bed, walking to him.

you ran your fingers through his hair and he looked at you. your eyes were drooping and your movements were sluggish.

“hey, baby. why are you still awake?” he questioned.

“i wanna sleep with you katsuki. how much longer are you going to work for?” you say, rubbing your eyes.

“i still have a couple more hours of work in me.”

you whine and he runs his fingers against your cheek.

“can i sit with you? miss you.” you lean into his touch.

“yeah, come on.” he turns his chair towards you, hands grabbing under your shoulders and lifting you into his lap, guiding your legs through the arm rests.

now you sit chest to chest with him, cuddling into his form.

‘well this is distracting..’ katsuki thinks, but he can’t help not caring. he wanted to be with you too.

he forces himself to continue working, determined to finish this assignment by tonight.

as he works he occasionally presses sweet kisses to your temple, caresses your cheek and slips his big hand under your shirt to trace your spine.

there’s a portion of the assignment that requires him to watch a video, so he opens the video and is met with a full blast intro from some stupid sidekick.

he jumps and pauses the video, his eyes wide and glued to you.

you whine, trying to hide your face in the comfort of your boyfriends neck.

“i know, sweet girl, ‘m sorry.” he kisses your cheeks.

“just go back to sleep, yeah?”

you blink the sleep out of your eyes, it’s late.

“kats, why are you working so late? can we go to bed now?” you ask sweetly.

he threads his fingers through your hair.

“i’m on the last part, just 20 minutes.” he reasons.

you wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him, lips moving in tandem and he groans softly.

“don’t overwork yourself, it’ll still be here tomorrow.” you drag your hands down his arms soothingly.

“come to bed.” you say into his jaw before pressing a kiss to it.

“fine, let’s go to bed.” he gives in and you smile into his skin, kissing it again.

he surprises you by standing with you still wrapped in his arms.

he propels the two of you onto his bed with a jump. you squeal, hiding your face in his neck.

“katsuki!” he laughs.

the two of you land with him under you to cushion your fall.

once your heart rate returns to normal after the scare he gave you, you wrap your arms around him and press your cheek to his chest.

the moment gets cut short and your heart rate spikes once again when you hear a knock at the door. eyes wide and looking at each other, the silent question stains the air…

‘is that aizawa?!’

you’d be expelled on the spot if the two of you were caught in katsukis room alone. the two of you decide to just stay silent in hopes of him giving up and walking away.

“yo bakugou!!” you hear a whisper-shout followed by more knocks.

katsuki groans and you laugh, getting up and walking to the door.

“hi kiri.” you say as you open it.

“hey yn! can i sleep on the beanbag tonight? i just watched the scariest movie ever made.”

“no!” katsuki shouts from his place in bed.

“yes, you can.” you say, sending a half assed glare to katsuki.

kirishima grins.

“thanks yn! you’re the greatest.” he says while running and jumping onto the massive beanbag in the corner of katsukis room.

you sigh sleepily and walk to katsuki, climbing into bed with him. he turns towards the wall and you accept it, he’s probably worried about showing pda. you end up turning away from him too, moving your foot back to rub against his calf affectionately.

“guys, you know ive seen you act lovey dovey before right? i’ll turn away so you guys can cuddle.” kirishima smiles.

“don’t worry about it kiri-“ you start.

“fine. do it then.” katsuki says, rolling over. he didn’t stop working for nothing! he wants to hold you!

kirishima grins at you before turning away.

you turn to look at your boyfriend. he presses his face into your neck and inhales. shifting to wrap his arm around your waist and put his other arm under your head as a pillow. he pulls you close to his chest. you look up at him and lift your hand from underneath the duvet to stroke at his cheek.

“i love you.” you whisper, quiet as a mouse as to not disturb kirishima.

katsuki grunts in response. you know he means ‘i love you too’ though, he’s just not ready to say it in front of kirishima.

“i love you guys too!” you hear from the beanbag in the corner and you laugh while katsuki grumbles about his friend, still hidden in your neck. he’s breathing deeply, trying to get every drop of the perfume you wear that wore of during the day. he can smell your lotion and the shampoo you use. he thinks he’s never smelt anything as good as you.

he kisses your neck before drifting off into a deep sleep, still tired from the hours of schoolwork he did.

[spaceshipellie]

Can you make gamer!ellie x fem!reader where Ellie is letting you take over her game with mic on while her strap is deep inside reader ;)

gamer!ellie x fem!reader

sweet jesus anon 🥵 can everyone tell i like writing gamer!ellie…

warnings: 18+ MDNI, strap use (r receiving), sort of exhibition kink?

it started out as a joke. a fantasy you rolled around in bed giggling about. it would be crazy for ellie to actually be deep inside her girl whilst her gamer mic was still on, right? well.

“fuck,” you groaned, feeling the strap stretch you.

“what happened?” one of ellie’s friends asked over the mic.

“nothing,” you giggled and felt ellie smile against the back of your neck as she left a kiss there.

you were completely naked in her lap and she couldn’t keep her hands off of you. they went from holding your waist to tickling down your thighs to running up your body and squeezing your tits. it was becoming impossible to fight off the moans that so desperately wanted to escape your pouty lips.

“something the matter, baby?” ellie continued leaving small kisses along your shoulder and behind your ear, careful not to be heard over the mic.

“you’re infuriating,” you lightly elbowed her ribs, a small smirk forming on your face as you tried to keep focus on playing the game.

an abundance of chatter sounded from ellie’s friends who you were playing with, luckily drowning out the teasing going on on your end.

“y/n? you there?”

“yeah, yep i’m here,” you scrambled with the controller to run your character to where the others were.

“wait, where are y–oh!”

you yelped and tried to hide it in a laugh as ellie bounced her hips up. the strap jolted inside you and your tits bounced with the impact.

“you okay?” someone asked, “i can see you now.”

you knew they were talking about your character on the screen but your cheeks heated at the idea of them seeing you, literally. seeing the way your girlfriend filled you up so nicely and the way she leant back in the chair, admiring the curve of your ass in her lap. she had even started tracing shapes and writing things on your back, knowing it would send shivers down your spine.

“yeah, i’m good. where do we need to go?”

ellie squeezed your hips.

“down here.”

she pushed them forward trying to move you.

“okay, i’ll follow you.”

you gave in to her and rocked your hips back and forth.

a low “fuck” sounded from behind you as she watched the way her strap kept slowly disappearing inside you, her hands still holding your hips. you nonchalantly continued playing the game, occasionally biting the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from moaning. ellie was going insane and could feel herself getting wetter by the second at how filthy you were being, and on a call with her friends no doubt. her filthy little slut.

whilst she was enjoying watching and listening to your sweet voice talking to them as if you weren’t fucking yourself on her right now, she also couldn’t wait until you were done so she could have her way with you. her lack of patience was getting the better of her when she decided to push you even further and slide her hand to your inner thigh. you shifted at the feeling of her fingertips against the sensitive skin and you weren’t sure how much more of this you could take.

“guys i found something, over here,” someone called.

you started to follow everyone, trying to ignore ellie’s wandering hands. but then you felt her fingertip press against your clit.

“okaaay, guys,” you jumped, nearly dropping the controller, “i’m gonna have to love you and leave you. sorry, bye, bye,” you rambled out and left the game, turning the mic off.

you leant back, pressing your back against her chest whilst ellie had a shit-eating grin on her face. she dragged a hand up your body to cup your boob and worked her other over your clit. you smiled as your head fell back and rested on her shoulder.

“ugh now fuck me properly, please?”

[chrissv4mp]

i'll love you 'til the day that i die! MATT S.

summary: you and matt have been frenemies since the 8th grade. when you both go to homecoming, you get picked for homecoming queen, and chris is your king. matt can't help but storm outside of the school angrily.

pairing: matt sturniolo × fem!reader

warnings/topics: arguments, vulgar language, fluff, sorta angst, confessions, highschool au, etc.

a/n: LOVE THIS SONG SMSMSMS also this probably makes no sense towards the end cause i was purely running on 2 bottles of water😖

"matt," you exclaimed, running into his room without any warning.

he jumped a little, eyes snapping toward the direction of his bedroom door.

you took a seat at his desk, pushing yourself toward his bed with your feet before spinning around to face him.

"why do you have so much energy this early in the morning?" he groaned, rubbing his eyes as he had just woken up a few minutes ago.

"cause, i just got big news? and, sorry for being so happy to see you?" you joked, rolling your eyes and leaning back in the chair.

matt hummed in curiosity, running a hand through his hair in an attempt to make it look better, "and what's the news?"

you almost couldn't stay still, changing the way you were sitting every moment or so.

"i got nominated for homecoming queen!" you all but yelled, making matt flinch slightly at the loud noise.

his smile was small, but very smug as if he was gonna say something to bring you down.

he could never shut his mouth whenever you brought up something good that happened to you, he always had to one-up you.

"cool, cool, but i've gotten nominated for homecoming king like years in a row. it's nothing big to be nominated once," he shrugged, keeping direct eye contact with you and watching as your face contorted into a subtle look of sadness.

your frown was small, and if matt hadn't been the one to trigger it, then he probably wouldn't have noticed.

he always did this, and you should've been used to it by now. but, god, did matt know how to push your buttons.

"yeah, well, i didn't see your name on there this time. you're not someone special, y'know?" you laughed, trying to hide your frustration.

matt's grin only widened at your words, "huh. well, it'll be there by tonight. those girls can't resist my charm, not even you, y/n."

"shut up. nobody wants a homecoming king that's an asshole to every girl he meets." you groaned, crossing your arms over each other.

"maybe, but you're the only girl i dislike at the school." matt bit back, leaning against his headboard as he stared you down.

you let out a quiet huff, looking around his room and letting your eyes land on the corkboard he had on the wall opposite his closet.

there were letters, pictures, and polaroids of all of his friends. and in one corner, there was a polaroid of you and him at the beach.

there was writing below it, 'i want u to stay 'till i'm in the grave<3' it was in dark blue sharpie.

your lips upturned into a small smile. he didn't hate you. he never really could, even if he tried.

"doesn't seem like you dislike me," you broke the silence, pointing over at the board.

matt's smile dropped, and his face flushed a soft pink color as he sat up straight. "just get out, would you!"

you giggled to yourself as you got off his chair, not forgetting to give him the middle finger before closing his door and walking back down the hall.

nick looked up from the sink as he heard your footsteps walking past the kitchen, turning around to look at you.

"bye, y/n," he smiled softly, waving over at you and accidently splashing water on the kitchen counter.

"see you later, nick," you smiled, waving back before resuming your walk down the stairs and out of the house.

"birds of a feather," chris said, breaking the silence between the four of you.

nick raised an eyebrow, looking to the side to see if chris was talking to him.

the younger boy was pointing over at you and matt, at the opposite end of the booth you all were sitting at.

"what?" matt laughed over the loud chatter of the cafeteria, crossing his arms before looking over at you.

you were confused just as he was, staring over at chris with an unsure look on your face, "right... and what are you yapping on about this time?"

chris looked dumbfounded, staring at the three of you in disbelief as he scoffed, "you guys seriously don't know that saying? i thought you were older than me."

"by, like, 2 seconds?" nick said, leaning on the table as he picked at the cafeteria food with a plastic fork.

chris punched his brother softly, rolling his eyes before explaining, "birds of a feather flock together, it basically means you guys are alike in one way or another."

matt laughed, looking over at you before giving his attention back to chris, "we are nothing alike, trust me. she's horrible at communicating, and i'm amazing at it. i'm popular. she's not."

"yeah, he's stupid, and i'm smart. remind me how we're alike, again?" matt looked away at your remark, silently mocking you.

"look at your outfits right now, if i didn't know any better i would think you guys are matching." chris pointed out, nodding his head in your direction.

nick nodded, "he's right, you guys look like a couple."

both yours and matts face flushed bright pink, and you looked seperate ways, embarrassment washing over the two of you.

"yeah, more like a couple of friends." you forced out, looking back up at nick and chris.

nick raised his eyebrows, looking away.

"and not to mention the many times you both have said the same phrase. like, tell me you hang out too much without telling me you hang out too much?" chris joked, laughing at himself.

nick chuckled quietly, nodding his head in agreement with his brothers.

"that's a coincidence." you mumbled, sitting up straight.

"it's happened more than i can count, i don't think it's a coincidence of any sort." nick said, looking over at matt, who just dragged his hands down his face.

"well, whatever. not like it's gonna last forever," matt said, and before anyone could reply, he stood up and left to his next class.

the bell rang a few seconds after, and you, nick, and chris gave each other confused looks.

"sorry, y/n. he's probably just had a rough day, i promise you he doesn't mean it." nick reassured you, reaching over the table to hold your hand.

he left a few moments later, and chris stayed with you.

"don't take it to heart, 'kay?" chris muttered softly, smiling at you.

you nodded, and chris began to add on, "i've seen him cry over you. he tells me he doesn't know why. all he says is that he doesn't think he could love you more than he already does."

nodding, smiling softly before watching chris get up and leave. now it was just you and your thoughts at the table alone.

huh. who would've thought matthew sturniolo, one of the most popular guys at school, would be crying over you, quiet, kept to herself, y/n l/n?

you couldn't tease him about it, you did the same thing for him. you always cried over matt, not even knowing why because he had never really hurt you.

you always just sobbed to nick about how you would love him 'til the day that he dies. and after those words registered in your head, you only cried more at the thought of matt dying.

but those nights, you were usually drunk or super high. nick always knew how to calm you down, though, he was always there for you whenever you needed.

matt had also occasionally been there for you in your lowest times, never hesitating to break the speed limit getting to your house.

he always confronted the boys that had stood you up, never let anyone talk bad about you or even give you dirty looks. even if he didn't consider you a friend, you thought of him as one.

"i just don't understand," matt whispered shakily as he looked up at the night sky, stars scattered all around and lighting the place around in just the slightest.

you sat next to him, fingers playing with the blanket the both of you were on, "what don't you understand?"

he shrugged, "i don't understand how anyone could love me."

your neck snapped in his direction, eyes widening a little as a million thoughts came to your mind.

you wanted him to see how he looked in your eyes. he was the funniest, most handsome, kind boy you have ever met (even if he did occasionally tick you off).

you wanted him to know how many subtle compliments you gave him that he never noticed, but still took.

but then again, you wanted to just tell him how he was so full of shit. he knew that anyone and everyone was capable of loving him.

he knew that he could get anyone wrapped around his finger in less than a week. hell, he sure got you wrapped around his finger in just a matter of 2 days.

"i just don't get what people see in me. sometimes i just want to quit everything i do at the thought of it." matt added, finally turning his head to look at you.

your gaze softened as he looked you in the eyes, a subtle look of concern plastered on your face as you reached out to pat his shoulder.

"don't be stupid, matthew. i think that if anyone even glanced in your direction, they would instantly fall in love. you're all any girl would want."

matt smiled, and you reached over to move his hair to see his face better. he was truly beautiful. you couldn't ever get tired of the sight of him.

"you really think that?" matt asked, and there was just the tiniest hint of smugness in his voice.

you nodded, tilting your head to see matt better in the pale moonlight.

"i do," you whispered, and before matt could speak, you cut him off, "and don't ruin this moment with one of your stupid remarks, matthew."

matt's lips parted, but he chose to stay silent. he was grateful for moments like this with you, when it was just you two alone and nobody else.

he loved being alone with you, especially late at night when you guys would have these deep talks. no words spoken here would ever leave, neither of you would bring those topics up.

it was a nice feeling, one that made him feel safe and secure in your presence.

as the months passed by and new memories with you were made, matt felt like you were slowly creeping into his heart, invading all of his senses.

all he could think about was you now, and he couldn't ever get you out of his head. not even when he was in boston, more than 2,000 miles away from you.

it came so fast, and you almost couldn't believe that you were standing outside of your high-school with your best friends, all dressed formally.

you were wearing a satin dark blue dress that went down to your knees, while matt and chris were wearing suits and ties.

matt's suit was navy blue, his dress pants being white to match with chris, who was wearing a white suit and navy blue dress pants.

nick wore an all blue suit, his tie being the only white thing on his outfit besides from his collared shirt he wore underneath the suit.

"holy shit, you're stunning, y/n!" nick exclaimed, stretching his arms out before you hugged him tightly.

he smiled into your hair, patting your back before pulling away from your embrace.

"talk about stunning, look at yourself, nicolas! you look amazing, blue looks beautiful on you." you complimented, smiling up at him before walking to stand beside him.

he interlocked your arms, and you finally got the chance to look over matt and chris' suits.

"we look better than you guys ever could," matt said, swinging his arm over chris' shoulder and pulling him closer.

chris smiled, nodding in agreement as he wrapped his arm around matt's waist.

"i don't know, y/n's dress might beat us." the younger boy shrugged, to which matt rolled his eyes at.

"you tell yourselves whatever you want, we're gonna go inside to get the night started," nick stated, pushing past chris and matt and purposely shoving matt playfully.

the two brunette boys weren't slow to follow you and nick, chris rushing in front of you to hold the door open.

when the four of you got intonthe gym, it immediately felt like you guys were gonna have the best night ever.

the lighting was a darker blue, illuminating all the bodies beneath it and capturing every small movement the kids made.

"wow," you whispered, and nick echoed you.

"hello, and welcome, los angeles lions to our 34th annual homecoming dance!" madi exclaimed into the microphone, her eyes scanning the paper she was holding.

the school cheered in excitement, and chris screamed out an encouragement for madi.

she smiled at all the familiar faces before leaning into the microphone to read from the paper again, "these past few weeks have been a little chaotic with all of the new nominees for both homecoming queen, and homecoming king, and tonight won't be any less chaotic."

"now, i'm honored to welcome up on stage the nominees for homecoming queen," madi spoke before flipping the paper over to the other side.

she read over the names, and a big smile came to her face when her eyes landed on the first one.

"please welcome up to the stage y/n l/n," she said, her smile frowing impossibly wider.

chris and nick shoved you around playfully before you finally came to your senses and ran up to the stage. it was an unreal experience, being one of the nominees, you felt like you couldn't compare to any of the other girls.

"alahna estrella," madi said, reading a few more names over the loud cheering of the students before she moved onto the boys.

the gym went silent once madi announced that she would be calling up the boys for homecoming king, now.

"now, i'm very happy to call up to the stage one of the very popular sturniolo triplets..."

matt got ready to walk up to the stage, but when the name fell from madi's mouth, he froze in shock.

"christopher sturniolo!" she said happily, clapping along with the other students.

your eyes widened at the sound of chris' name being called, and you clapped for him.

nick watched as chris made his way up the stairs onto the stage, yelling out his name and clapping for his brother.

matt clapped slowly, the realization that he wouldn't get to be the homecoming king washing over him. whatever, it didn't matter anyway because he already had 3 crowns from past years.

more names were called, and even nate was invited up to the stage as a nominee for homecoming king.

when the crowd settled down, madi had began to speak again, "now, the announcement that we've all been waiting for... this year's homecoming king is.."

madi's eye widened in surprise before she smiled big and read off his name, "christopher sturniolo!"

matt sighed, clapping for his brother. he was happy sure, but then again he was jealous. things always went his way, and he just wasn't ready for this happen.

was he being selfish?

after chris was crowned homecoming king, he stood beside madi up on the stage, smiling big at all the students of his high-school.

"and, for your homecoming queen. this year's homecoming queen is y/n l/n!" madi said, clapping proudly at you as she watched you get crowned.

you couldn't believe it. it felt surreal, like you were in a dream you couldn't wake up from. as you walked over to chris, he pulled you into a huge hug, muttering a quiet, "congratulations." into your ear.

madi took yours and chris' hand as she walked back up to the mic, bringing all of your hands into the air as she yelled out into the microphone.

"please give big love to our new homecoming king and queen, y/n and chris!"

the students cheered, some jumping up and down out of excitement as they screamed their hearts out.

matt huffed angrily, jumping out of his seat before pushing his way past multiple people to get to the exit.

he didn't go unnoticed by you, your eyes following him as he stormed out of the gymnasium.

you were surprised the door hadn't made a sound, it looked like he slammed into the door without even flinching.

"shit," you whispered, worry flashing over your features.

as soon as you got off stage, you ran out of the gym, ignoring all of the people who tried to congratulate you on your way down.

you ran outside of the school, turning every way to try and spot matt. when you did, his eyes locked with yours.

he was sat on the sidewalk, a streetlight illuminating his face as the spotlights had done inside.

you ran over to him, taking a seat next to him and scooting close to him.

it was silent for a few minutes. the two of you just absorbed in all of your thoughts about what just happened.

"congratulations on homecoming queen, i'm happy for you." matt said, looking over into your eyes.

you smiled, "thanks."

"sorry you weren't nominated, i thought you would have been considering you have been every other year." you apologized, and matt shook his head softly.

it wasn't just that, it was the fact that his brother was your homecoming king. it was the knowledge that matt would never get to be your king.

it was the fact that he would never get to be yours.

"i'm sorry, i just can't do this anymore, y/n." matt stood up from his spot, and you looked up at him.

you raised an eyebrow, worry still lingering in your head from matt's earlier outburst, "what? you can't do what?"

you stood up next, now face to face with the boy you both hated and loved the most.

"i just don't understand what we are, what i mean to you and what you even think of me. you keep giving me these fucking mixed signals and i don't know how to interpret them!" matt held his head in his hands, rubbing his temples in an effort to calm himself down.

you swore you felt your heart shatter at his words. maybe this wasn't gonna be the best night you've ever had.

"what- mixed signals? i.. matt, what are you talking about?" you thought you knew what he was getting at, but as the words came out of your mouth, the thoughts fled from your mind.

matt muttered inaudible words before he finally spoke clearly, "you keep pushing me away and then pulling me back again, and i don't know what to do, y/n."

"do you want me, or am i just some guy you're toying with to get popularity? one minute you're nice and you have my back, and the next you're so fucking cold it's like i'm not even there, like you don't even care about me."

your eyebrows furrowed, he was explaining exactly how he made you feel.

"don't be a hypocrite, matt. i don't even act that way, you're explaining exactly what you make me think. i have all these thoughts and ideas i want to share with you, but when i do, you come over and push them down. why would i even want popularity? i don't give a shit about it, matt!"

"why do you do this to me, seriously?" your voice cracked, and only then did matt realize you were crying.

he groaned, taking small paces back and forth as he breathed heavily.

when he stopped, he was right in front of you, gaze soft as he stared into your e/c eyes.

"because i love you," he finally spilled it, and he didn't regret it. not at all.

the look on your face was not at all what he was expecting. he thought you might he disgusted or even angry.

"don't act so surprised, y/n." he said quietly, cupping your face with his hands.

they were cold, but you still leaned into his touch as he wiped away your tears.

he pulled you closer to him, and you ended up in his arms as you began to calm down. "god, i hate you, matt."

"yeah? well i'll love you 'till the day that i die." he muttered softly.

you laughed quietly, punching him playfully before pulling away.

he stayed silent, a soft smile on his face. as he continued to stare at you, he started to realize more and more things.

one thing he realized was that he never wanted to say goodbye.

maybe chris was right. maybe you two were birds of a feather.

. . . . . . . . .

tags: @cindylcuwho

[purifiedclitoris69]

In it together

Hiii. I am alive, just very busy and overwhelmed with living ig. College fucking sucks and so does everything else rn, but figured i get a lil blurb out before i have to lock back into my classes. hope you enjoy!! don’t really know what ima do w my series or when ima update so i am sorry bout that LOL. anyway bye for now 👋👋

You were absolutely exhausted. A 2 week mission with only 3 hours of sleep total takes an intense toll, even if you are a super soldier. Letting the burning hot water run down your back , flashes of the recent mission ran through your mind. The experiment files were horrific, so many deaths, so many children.

You had only been at the compound for about a year and a half now, the team rescuing you from Hydra’s control like Bucky. You were free of the brainwash but not of the memories and this long ass mission had brought it all right back to the surface. It was getting better, your in therapy, bonding with the team, learning how to control your strength, your growing. But this mission, feels like it’s all about to come crumbling down. It made you feel sick. Thoughts of losing yourself, the team… of losing, Natasha, it burned your throat.

What you have with Natasha is confusing, complicated, but nice. No one else knows the true nature of it but you two. Falling into each others beds continuously for the past 8 months, staying tangled in each other, every single night, cuddling, and giggling like little teen girls. The team simply thought you guys were close friends, both you two being spies, it wasn’t too hard to hide your extracurriculars. But you both knew it was more, so much more. You held each other in the most gentlest ways…the most loving, opting not to leave one another when you guys inevitably came undone. In front of the team, you had a front, a quiet brooding one, but with her, it was peaceful, relieving, you felt free, like yourself. It was absolutely terrifying.

Not realizing it tears were beginning to mix with the water running down your face and crescent marks formed in your palms from clenching your fists too hard. You love her. You’re in love with her, but how could you tell her, would you. Your whole life you’ve been used as a weapon, serving for the military, then hydra. You were dangerous…a monster. It was late, almost 2 am, you couldn’t go to her now, she need rest, not a burden. no matter how much you yearned for her warmth. Turning off the burning water, you stepped out into the steam filled bathroom. Drying off, you wrapped the towel around your waist and another draped over your shoulders, you opened the door to your bedroom-on your bed sat Nat. Dark circles surrounded her eyes, her hair was slightly ruffled, she wore an old shirt of yours, and some of her loose sleep shorts. She looked absolutely stunning, you couldn’t help but give a soft tired smile.

“hi.” she spoke softly with a matching smile.

“hi,” you answered stopped in place just taking her in.

“you gonna get dressed,” she smirked tiredly, “tho i don’t mind.”

“oh really” you joked walking over to her and cupping her face as she looked up at you, “i missed you,” you spoke softly the tiredness bringing out a transparency.

She leaned into your hand closing her eyes, “i missed you,” she answered. Your heart swelled and the flashes came back, you could hurt her, what if you lose it. Suddenly taking a step back her cheek still warm from your touch, her eyes flew open. You turned your back, getting dressed by your closet, “is everything okay,” she asked as you pulled your tank top over your head and braced yourself against your dresser.

You opened your mouth unsure what you wanted her to know, “yeah,” was all you could muster.

“I really did miss you,” she walked up behind you wrapping her arms around your waist and leaning her check against your back, just enjoying your smell, “i don’t sleep well without you anymore.”

“me either,” you turned around wrapping your own arms around her middle and looking to the side as hers went to your neck, “it was a rough mission,” you mumbled

“oh, baby,” she spoke, moving her hands to your face this time, “look at me please,” your eyes were burning with unshed tears as they met her soft deep green ones, “oh, my love, it’s okay,” she brought your head down to her shoulder as you released a shaky breath and let your arms fall from around her waist, “is there something else,” she asked dropping her own hands. You walked past her to sit on the bed not really sure where to start as you looked at your hands in your lap, “we don’t have to talk about it, it’s okay,” she spoke sitting beside you and gently take your hands in her own.

You finally looked back at her face, your eyes still glossy. You stared deep into each others eyes, “you’re so beautiful, Natasha,” you said memorizing every detail of her. She laughed quietly as a soft blush rose to her face.

“Shut up,” she said putting her forehead against hers.

She closed her eyes at the action as yours remained open, “I mean it, you’re the prettiest girl there is.”

Her blush grew as she pulled back and looked away slightly, “god i love you,” she mumbled out casually bringing shock to both your faces. She immediately pulled her hands away and stood from the bed, her mouth opening and closing unsure what to say as you looked at her, overwhelmed with emotions, “y/n i’m sorry i-“

“You do?” you asked getting up from the bed with her, “you love me?”

“I..” She spoke uncertain, taking a deep breath in, “y/n i’m in love with you.” You laughed slightly in disbelief. You moved towards her with purpose grabbing her waist and pulling her into a bruising kiss, pouring every amount of love into it as possible, like it was the last time, like you were consumed by everything Natasha. You both grinned wide into the kiss, forcing the two of you to break apart.

Taking a deep breath, “Tasha, I..,” the thoughts all came rushing back. Your going to hurt her, you don’t deserve this love, your going to lose it all.

She moved her hands down from your neck to intertwine with your own, “I know,” she whispered.

“I really do,” you said, your foreheads still pressed together, “I..,” your mouth fell open and closed absolutely terrified to say something wrong, “Im just scared,” you mumbled, closing your eyes, but never dropping your hold.

“Don’t be,” she answered, moving her hands back up to cup your face, “we’re in this together.”

[loverofallthingssarah]

no more runnin’

part 2

melissa schemmenti x reader

summary: you’re hiding, you’re running. melissa finds you and your daughter and helps bring you both back to life.

warning: angst

word count: 1.9k

part 1 part 3

a/n: this is my first time writing in probably over a year so i hope it’s decent! also i'm sorry if there are any spelling errors or grammatical errors.

“hi…” your voice is barely there. Melissa pulls her hand back and clears her throat. 

“Well, pick up is at 3:30. Please try to be on time,” she grabs a paper from her room, “this is a list of supplies she’ll need for the school year. Principal Coleman probably forgot to give it to you. It’s okay to not have them today, but please try to have them by Friday.” 

You nod your head along in agreeance, your hand by your side waving your fingers back and forth reeling from her touch. Knowing yourself retreating from feeling anything for anyone. Melissa on the other hand is looking at you feeling a push to want to talk to you more but knowing she can’t let herself overstep being a teacher and you a parent. Then you realize suddenly, “Oh, shi-crap! I’m going to be late for work. I will get all those supplies for you by Friday, promise!” you peek your head in, “Bye baby, I’ll see you later today.” 

Melissa is watching you take off down the hallway, shaking her head at you thinking, ‘she’s gonna be a pain, a smoking hot pain but she’s got spunk.’ She chuckles as she closes her class room, words spilling out from the crack of the door, “Good morning, my little eagles…”

A couple of uninterrupted months fly by, and everything is going according to your plan. Your parents haven’t alerted you of any problems brewing from your past, and you finally feel at home. It felt nice having settled into your home and Acey was coming along nicely trying her best to feel at peace here. There was one person that was now taking up space in your mind day and night, a fiery redheaded teacher haunted your dreams. As much as you tried to shake the thought, you found yourself attracted to her. You would pick up Acey every day and sneak peaks at Melissa, but not allowing yourself to indulge in your crush. Melissa on the other hand loved to indulge just enough to make it hard for you to stay away. 

“Go out with me.” the redhead asked as she watched you packing up your daughter's backpack.  “No.”  “Is it because of our age difference?” she asked curiously.  “No.”  “Is it because ya not inta women?” delving deeper.  “Oh, I’m as gay as they come.” you turned around finally meeting her eye to eye. It was getting harder and harder for you to push past her advances.  “No strings attached? I just want to get to know you Y/N.” You sigh, wanting nothing more than just that but also knowing that just isn’t in the cards for you. You had to protect your family.  Shrugging your shoulders, “It’s not that simple.”  Acey is standing in the corner watching this all unfold wondering why her mother never let anyone in.  You always encouraged her to make new friends but you never allowed yourself to do the same. “Then what is it? I swear I don’t get ya. I see the way you look at me,” you blush, “what gives?” A question you wish you knew how to answer, “Now’s just not a good time, Ms. Schemmenti.” “Call me Melissa.”

On the other side of town, Melissa is sitting on the couch talking to her best friend and work wife Barbara Howard about how smitten she is with you. 

“Barb, I know nothing about her yet I can’t shake her from my mind.  I try to talk with her but she keeps me at arms length,” she grumbles sipping from her glass of Chardonnay. 

Barbara having noticed all of your interaction with her friend from afar mentions, “Y/N seems to be extremely guarded. She never asked for help. Never accepts parent volunteer offers. She must have a lot going on. Just give her space, and if there is something between you both it will happen naturally. Don’t go making a fool of yourself for a woman you don’t even know!” 

Thinking back, Melissa already knows she’s made a fool of herself trying to gain your attention. Countlessly asking you out to dinner trying to get to know you more. 

Standing right beside the front desk waiting for Principal Coleman to take your field trip money, “Principal Coleman, I don’t have all day I have to be at work in an hour.”   “Hold on, tasty.  I wanna show you my new line of iPhone cases.  They all have bikini pics of me on them and I know you wanna see them,” she wiggles her eyebrows at you as you roll your eyes at her ridiculousness.   “Plus, Melissa has been begging me to get you to be a chaperone for the zoo field trip.  She’s really starting to get on my nerves, so will you say yes already?”  “Ava, I told you I don’t have the time to take off work,” yeah that seemed like a good enough excuse. You didn’t notice Janine and Melissa sneaking up behind you.  They really did need more chaperones for the second grade field trip, but Melissa definitely had ulterior motives. Janine speaks up first, “Please, we could really use your help.  Plus being a nurse we know we could trust you with our kids, because between you and me some of these parents kind of scare me.” she whispers the last part.  “Come on kid, just take one day off.  You can even sit next to me on the bus,” Melissa smirks at you.  And as tempting as that sounds and as much as you would like to spend time with the older woman…

Acey having watched this scene unfold spoke up, "Mom, It would be so fun if you came! We can see all the animals and I can show you what Ms. Schemmenti hold me about EAGLES! PLEASEEEEEEE!" she all but screams. You want nothing more than to be there for her and her - not to mention Melissa as well,- but alsas you reply. “No baby, I can’t.”

‘Don’t go making a fool of yourself’ Melissa scoffs knowing that she can’t do that while simultaneously thinking, ‘why is she so guarded? what is she hiding?’

On your side of town, “Mom, I really wish you could visit. Acey is doing so well and she’s made so many friends,” you gush to your mom over how proud you are of your daughter. 

“I know, sweetie. It’s been so long since I’ve gotten to hug you both, but we have to remember you’d still be in Florida if we hadn’t slipped up and

visited last time,” Nina whispers on the other end of the phone. “Tom, is going to plan on figuring out a way to keep a visit under the radar, but until then we can video chat every night.” Thankful for your dad trying to make sure that even though your life has been completely and totally uprooted, and you don’t know how you would be able to do any of this without their help and support. 

Days later you’re caught up in the emergency room, patient after patient. You check your wristwatch and see it’s 3:18 p.m., there is no way you’re going to be able to get your daughter. Frantically, you call the school hoping someone other than Principal Coleman will pick up. 

“Hello! This is Abbot Elementary and you're on with Ashley,” the young woman giggled in the phone as you rolled your eyes forgetting how Ms. Schemmenti’s aide meddled into becoming Ava’s secretary.

“Ashley, I need you to listen to me very carefully. I’m stuck at work and I don’t have anyone who can pick up Acey for me. Once I finish up my last patient, I will rush right over. Please tell me if someone can keep an eye on her until I do.” inside you're hoping it won’t be Ashley. “Yes, I’m sure Miss Teague would do it. Okay, bye!!”

‘It’s going to be okay, it’s going to be okay’ you think to yourself as you finish up your patient. As soon as you're done, you clock out and rush over to the school. 

Panicking you pull up to an almost empty parking, but you notice one car in particular. You make your way inside the school and make a bee line for your daughter’s classroom. There is a soft glowing light creeping through a certain second grade classroom door and you make your way over to peek inside. 

The sight unfolding in front of you is the most precious you’ve probably ever seen. Your daughter is a strong willed little girl who owns a room with her presence, and she definitely is the center of attention with her sassy little attitude. You see her sitting on the carpet learning against her gorgeous teacher - you blush every time you look or think about Melissa- while listening to her teacher reciting a story of a lion, a witch, and a wardrobe. 

“Once a king or a queen of Narnia, always a king or queen of Narnia…” 

You clear your throat, “mmmm, hey baby girl! Did you have a good day today?” 

Acey looks up with a bright smile and screams, “Momma! Ms. Schemmenti was reading me the COOLEST story!” Melissa stands up behind Acey and smirks at you with her signature look. A look that makes you want to melt into a puddle right in front of her. 

“I know it’s a little advanced for her, but you have one smart girl on your hands Y/N,” Melissa grins at you both. Glowing, almost. 

“I am so sorry, Ms. Schemmenti. I promise to try and make sure this never happens again. I’m not usually…” you ramble before she cuts you off. “Hon, it’s okay.  And as I've told you before Y/N, please call me Melissa,” she winks at you, “I had a wonderful time here with Miss Acey and if you ever need any help don’t be afraid to ask.” 

But you couldn’t let yourself let that happen, “Thank you, but that won’t be necessary Ms. Sch- Melissa.” 

Acey is looking between you both, “but mom!”

You shake your head, “Acey go grab your things we need to go pick up dinner.”

Melissa, whom has been trying to break you out of your shell since first meeting you, asks abruptly, “Will you have dinner with me Saturday?”  She shocks herself a bit with her question already knowing what the answer will be. Knowing she’s asked you many times before. She omits the fact she asked to stay late with Acey to have a moment more of your time. 

“I can’t, I’m sorry,” you reply trying to hurry your daughter along to avoid furthering this conversation.

“Why not?” she counters. 

“Melissa, I… I-I just can’t. It has nothing to do with you and everything to do with me.” 

“It doesn’t have to mean anything if you don’t want it to, Y/N. Just one dinner, please,” she uncharacteristically begs. 

In the doorway ushering your daughter out into the hall, you take a deep breath before whispering, “That’s the problem, it will mean everything… I can’t.”  

Melissa swears she sees your eyes glistening before you make your exit from her classroom. She really tried to let her feelings go for the ghost of a person you were, but she couldn’t. She needed to know more of you, she had the pull telling her she needed to know you. Needed to help you. She kicked her desk and ran out towards the parking lot. 

[grey342]

Grovel

Phil Wenneck x reader

synopsis - You make Phil grovel after an argument

warnings - MDNI 18+ content, teasing Phil, slightly in public, P in V, no protection and Phil talking you through it (kinda).

authors note - Thank you guys for being so patient it means the world to me! I'm gonna try to post at least once a week but, school may get in the way of that fml. Thank you again for all the support and I hope you like this one. P.S- this was kinda rushed so apologies for that :)

please do not steal my work - belongs to @grey342

If looks could kill, I would've been dead as soon as I walked through the door.

There has been a bit of tension in the Wenneck household this week. Okay a lot of tension. It all started on Monday; Phil had to work late at the school again, which, of course, you had no problems with. However, the thing that bothered you was when he came home and revealed to you he was with that one colleague who has a massive crush on him.

Naturally being a grown adult, you communicated these concerns with Phil but, he claimed you were looking into things too much and he only has eyes for you. How cute.

So, you voiced these concerns to him yet again on Monday night. He claimed that you were being "dramatic" and "childish". Big mistake. You both started to go back and forth at each other until you ended the argument with the classic:

"you're sleeping on the couch tonight!"

Due to your stubbornness, the pair of you haven't spoken a word to each other since. It's now Friday night, the night you and your friends designated as the weekly get together.

You and Phil both agreed to act civil with each other but you weren't letting him get off that easy. You done your makeup exactly the way he likes, put on his favourite dress and, as the last kick in the teeth, put on his favourite matching set.

You had already everyone that you were going to run a little late due to work, so they all got started without you. You took an Uber to the bar and as soon as you stepped through the doors, you could feel his eyes burning into you.

You walk over to the table greet everyone and sit down next to him. The table began to converse with each other when you felt his breath on your neck.

"You think you're really funny don't ya?" He grunts.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." You respond, feining innocence.

"Oh you don't huh?" He retaliates slightly smirking. You shake your head slightly and join in on the conversation. He puts his hand on your thigh and grips it to gain your attention.

"I'm in the middle of a conversation sweetheart, don't be rude." You teased. He straightens himself and moves his hand higher. He slowly moves it higher and higher until he reaches underneath your dress.

You struggle to hide your smirk when you see him realise. He leans in his voice barely a whisper.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" You pull his hand out and place it on his lap.

"Control yourself Phillip, we're in public." You warn smirking as you notice the vein on his forehead, popping slightly. You love doing this to him. It's your favourite hobby; getting a rise out of Phil.

The dinner goes on and you've been teasing him non-stop, waiting for him to snap. It's when you hover your hand over his buldge and rub softly against it, he does.

"Okay so sorry to cut it short but we gotta go," he says standing and grabbing your hand, "Doug if you could call me tomorrow and give me our bill that would be great bye guys." They all mutter goodbyes as he drags you by the hand to the car.

He gets in and slams the door.

"What the fuck do you think your playing at? And don't even try to pull that innocent bullshit act. What is going on?" He exclaims.

"You know what's going on." You say avoiding his gaze. He scoffs.

"Are you seriously this pissed over her?"

"Yes, I am! And I know it's stupid but," you sigh, "I trust you with my entire life. But..I don't trust her and I know that's a ridiculous excuse but-" He takes your hand into his.

"Oh sweetheart, you should've told me this. If I knew you were this bothered by her I would've stopped talking to her months ago."

"Really?" You look into his eyes.

"Of course." He reassures.

"Now, don't think you're completely off the hook," you look at him confused, "oh honey, don;t tell me you thought you would get away with that little stunt you pulled at dinner." Your eyes widen in fear and excitement.

"Just wait until we get home."

Throughout the entire car ride, he seems freakishly calm. But as soon as you step foot into your apartment his hands are all over you as his mouth claims yours. You moan out of surprise and your hands immediately began to rake his back.

His hands reach your thighs, he lifts you up, your legs wrap around his waist, and carries you to the bedroom. He places you on the end of the bed and begins to strip down until he's in his underwear. You doing exactly the same. He stops dead in his tracks and his eyes scan you from top to bottom.

"Holy fuck baby." You go to take your bra off when he stops you.

"Leave it on." He demands and pushes you back onto the bed. Your mouths meet again in a wave of passion. His hands rubbing up and down on your thighs until he meets your core.

He begins to slightly rub over your clit through your panties making you moan in his mouth. He slowly picks up the pace but it's not enough to take you over the edge.

"Please.." You beg.

"Please what?" He taunts.

"Please let me cum." You breathe out.

"Oh I don't think you deserve that just yet." He pulls his fingers away and you whine at the loss of them. in the blink of an eye his boxers are off and he began pumping his dick. He pushes your panties over to the side and rubs his tip slowly over your slit. You moan at the sensation.

He pushes the tip in at an agonizing pace and you began to squirm out of impatience.

"What's wrong honey?" He teases.

"Please Phil.."

"Come on, you can do better than that."

"Please, please fuck me Phil."

"Atta girl." He says sliding all the way in. He gives you no mercy as he pounds into you, the headboard beginning to bang against the wall. He places his head in the crook of your neck, his grunts and whimpers vibrating against your neck.

"You think it's funny to tease me hm? Make you feel good?" He asks in between breaths. You whine, shaking your head.

"No, good. From now on 'm gonna prove to you everyday that you are ten times the woman she is." He moans and picks up the pace.

"She doesn't hold a torch to you baby, she never will." You moan loudly, feeling the pressure build in your lower stomach.

"Phil..?" Your breath quickens.

"Yes honey?"

"I'm gonna cum."

"Me too, hold on we'll do it together mkay?"

"Okay.." His hand moves down to rub you clit, you whimper in response.

"Ready," you nod your head rapidly, "cum baby, oh fuck, cum on my dick." The second he says that you let the pleasure consume you. You feel his cum shoot into you as he whimpers in your ear.

You place your hand on his head, slightly pulling on his hair. He looks at you with a playful smirk on his face.

"What?" You return the gesture.

"Round two?"

"Fuck off." You say chuckling. He leans forward claiming your lips. You smile into the kiss.

His head slumps on your chest and the pair of you let sleep take over.

[sunflowergirl522]

Fat Cat

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Reader

Summary: Eddie feeds strays and your cat gets out.

Word Count: 2033

A/n: Not my best work but enjoy it anyway? Also the Eddie Taglist may or may not open up after this one.

Eddie Masterlist

Eddie’s been feeding the strays around the trailer park for as long as he’s been living with his uncle. It started with one skinny kitten coming up to him on the porch while he was eating a hotdog. It let out the softest meow he’d ever heard and he didn’t even hesitate breaking a piece off and dropping it a few feet away from him. Over the years the amount of cats he was feeding grew and scraps of food and leftovers no one was gonna eat became cat food that Eddie went out of his way to get. 

Eddie was cleaning up the first time your cat trailed up to his trailer at night. It was one of Wayne's rules, if you’re gonna feed the whole neighborhood at least clean up at night so I don’t have to hear them when I’m trying to sleep. He happened to look up from where he was picking up the scattered pieces of cat food on the porch and came face to face with the fattest orange cat he’d ever seen. 

“Hello there. You look like you’ve already eaten five whole bowls.” The cat plopped down and just stared at him. “Oh alright, I guess a little more won’t kill you.”

“Oh my God!” You had rushed over as soon as you spotted Tigger scooping him up without even looking at the now wide eyed boy. “You’re such a fucking dick you know that?”

“I’m sorry?”

“Oh! Not you, sorry! I was talking to this fatass.” You finally looked away from the cat and met his eyes. “He recently learned that he can bust through the shitty screen door if it’s not locked. Were you about to give him food?” 

“Uh, I think so?” Eddie wasn’t completely sure what was happening exactly.

“I’m trying to keep him on a diet so hopefully he loses weight. I’m Y/n, just moved into the trailer over that way.” You motioned to a trailer behind you without looking before holding your hand out for him.

“Eddie.” He frantically brushed his hands off on his jeans before standing and taking your own. 

“This menace is Tigger and despite who he’s named after he’s the laziest piece of shit you’d ever see. Isn’t that right baby boy?” You brought his face up to yours as you cooed at the cat in your arms that was purring up a storm. “I’ll let you get back to what it was you were doing, bye Eddie see you around!” And with that you turned and hurried back to your trailer leaving Eddie to wish he’d said something, anything, else.

Since then Tigger has found his way over to Eddie’s trailer at least five more times, but most likely more because those are just times Eddie’s caught him when he’s getting home from work. He’s always quick to scoop the cat up before heading over to your place to drop him off. If you weren’t home he’d leave a note on your door saying he had Tigger and to come get him when you could. But when you were home you’d usher Eddie in and make him dinner as a reward for bringing your baby home. Usually it was some form of pasta but it was always one of the best meals Eddie’s had, and he made sure to tell you. 

“Listen all I’m saying is you’ve been in a suspiciously good mood lately and I don’t get why you’d hide a girlfriend from us.” Dustin says for what feels like the millionth time today but really is only the second, Mike asking earlier makes it three times total, as he follows Eddie to his trailer's door. 

“I’m not hiding a girlfriend. How many times do I have to tell you I don’t have one?” He groans as he fishes out his key to unlock it glancing over quickly to the porch. He does a double take when he recognizes the orange ball. 

“Hey there troublemaker!” He jumps from the stairs and steps to the porch tapping it to get the cat's attention. Tigger turns around at the sound and lets out a small sound while running to Eddie’s hand to be pet. “You get out again?”

“God fucking damnit!” Eddie can hear your yell from your trailer across the way thanks to the door being open and it being a quiet afternoon in the trailer park.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” Eddie smiles as Tigger bumps his head into his hand knowing you’re about to make your way over.

“Are you gonna unlock the door anytime soon or what?” Dustin asks from where he’s been standing at the door.

“Eddie!” Your voice fills his ears before he can respond to Dustin and he turns his head to watch you come towards him, his smile bigger than Dustin’s ever seen. “Please tell me he came over here again.”

“Yep.” He moves out of the way to reveal the cat purring into his hand.

“Thank God! I really have to start locking the door so fatty stops coming over and eating all your food.”

“Don’t be mean.” Eddie snatches Tigger up before you can grab him, protectively holding him close to his chest. “He’s lost weight and deserves a little treat.” That was true, Tigger is now much smaller than he was when Eddie first saw him. Thanks to you taking him on walks, a feat you had to do with his treat bag in hand, and having him on the diet.

“You’re awful, oh my god!” You laugh through your words. “Stop spoiling him before he starts liking you more than he likes me.”

“What am I watching right now?” Dustin pulls the two of your attentions over to him. Eddie throws his head back suppressing a groan at the reminder that he was there at all. 

“Oh hello! I’m Y/n, and that’s my cat Tigger.” 

“I’m Dustin, Eddie’s best friend.”

“Well it’s nice to meet you Dustin.” You smile at the younger boy and Eddie clears his throat to bring your eyes back to him. 

“Has he been gone long?” He nods his head down at the cat in his arms. 

“I don’t know, probably not. I just got out of the shower and the door was cracked open so he must’ve escaped while I was in it.” You step closer to him so you can scratch Tigger behind his ears and Eddie’s heart picks up a bit at your closeness.  “Are you just getting home?”

“Yeah. I was unlocking the door when I spotted him.”

“Oh!” Your sudden exclamation has Eddie and Dustin both slightly jumping. “I finished your book! Let me take him home and I’ll come right back with it and you can give me the next one.” You take Tigger from his arms and hurry off to your trailer.

Eddie had let you borrow Fellowship of the Ring after you stopped by his trailer to talk to him after seeing him reading on the porch. You had noticed how the book looked like it’s been read more than once and Eddie mentioned it being his favorite series. You’re the one who asked to read it and he had shut the book and handed it to you right then and there. 

“So that’s what’s got you in such a good mood.” Dustin states as Eddie comes back up the steps to open the door. 

“Alright c'mon punk inside.” He holds the door open for his younger friend. 

“Why don’t you ask her out?”

“What makes you think I want to ask her out?” He desperately does but he’s not sure exactly how to. Being friends with a girl? That was always easy for him but going from friends to something else with girls? That was always something that was difficult for him but has become so much harder since the Vecna stuff last year seeing as people barely wanted to be seen around him if they weren’t before even after his name was cleared.

“The heart eyes you got the minute she came over and how it was like watching parents fussing over their child.” Eddie tinges pink at Dustin’s correct descriptions. 

“Just shut up and pick a movie. I gotta go find The Two Towers.”

Dustin’s looking through Eddie’s and Wayne’s limited pick of movies, wishing they had stopped by Family Video, when there’s a knock on the door. He knows that it has to be you and in that moment he comes up with a plan without thinking twice about it while he opens the door.

“Hi again!”

“Eddie wants to know if you wanna go on a date with him?”

“What?” Your eyes go wide and you step back a little bit as if the shock of hearing those words come out of Dustin's mouth was so strong that it forced you back. At the same time Eddie freezes in the kitchen, eyes basically bulging out of his head and his mouth agape. What he should do is grab Dustin by the back of his shirt and throw him back into the living room before trying to laugh it off but he can’t get himself to move, stuck in his spot book in hand and heart racing in his chest anxious for what Dustin might say next and how you’re going to react.

“He wants to take you out to dinner or something and then kiss you at your door. Maybe then introduce you to all his friends and move in together and have babies and-” Eddie rushes over and throws his hand over his friend's mouth who’s now on thin ice.

“Okay! That’s enough of that!” He awkwardly chuckles as he shoves Dustin off to the side. He peeks at you out of the corner of his eye before turning to look at you instead of glaring at Dustin when he sees the soft smile on your face.

“Here’s your book. I really really liked it and I can’t wait to read the next one.” Eddie takes your words as a signal that you’re just going to forget everything that was just said to you and he doesn’t know if he’s more disappointed or relieved that you’re not saying anything about it.

“Here.” He hands you the next book while taking the first one from you. “The first one’s my favorite but the rest are just as good.” 

“Hey Eddie?”

“Yeah Sweetheart?”

“There’s this movie coming out next week, The Princess Bride, you wanna maybe take me to see it? Then depending on how that goes we can kiss at my door and maybe you can introduce me to your friends.” Eddie’s mouth opens and closes a few times like a fish out of water as he tries to find the words too shocked to think of anything.

“Yeah, yes, I would love to take you out to see it!” He beams at you once he does find the right words and you return one of your own in response.

“Perfect then it’s a date! See you tomorrow probably.” After a quick finger gun and wave you’re hurrying back home to dance around in excitement with Tigger.

“Well, it looks like you should be thanking me.” Dustin says once Eddie steps back from the door and turns to him, arms crossing over his chest.

“Run.”

“What? But I totally just got you a date!” And yet Dustin’s realizing he may have taken it a little too far in the process of getting him said date.

“And I’ll give you a head start because of that. Starting…now.”

“Why don’t we just watch a movie and celebrate the accomplishment that just happened?”

“You’re wasting precious time.” And with that Dustin rushes out of the door Eddie hot on his heels.

“What happened to the head start?!”

“I lied!” With that he tackles Dustin to the ground, both boys laughing in the process of falling. “Thanks.” He punches his arm after a minute of them both just laying there on the ground and stands up offering a hand. “Now let’s go have that movie night you begged me for.” Dustin rolls his eyes following Eddie back inside.

Eddie Taglist(Closed): @sadbitchfangirl​ @notbeforelong​​ @munsonswhore86​​ @navs-bhat​ @emotionaldreamer​ ​​​​​ @fangirling-4-ever​  @gaysludge​ @audhd-dragonaut​ ​​ ​@eddiethesexy​ @mazerunnerrose​ @tvserie-s-world​ @midnightsgetawaycar  @goldylions  @spacedoutdaydreamer @mushroomelephant @saramelaniemoon @kaylshunter @nojamsonmytoast @vintagehellfire @esoltis280 @spikedhe4rt @let-love-bleeds-red @siriuslysmoking @toobsessedsstuff @alana4610 @gretavanfleas @sparkletash @aactuaaltraash @spookyemorockbabe

Everything Taglist: @matchamunson @bubsonnobx @practicalghost @katsukis1wife @crustyowos @yourfavdummy @protecteddiemunson4vr @kennedy-brooke

[elsweetheart]

what’s the worst that could happen to a girl that’s already hurt?

🎀 when your best friend ellie stands you up, the man who raised you both swoops in to save the day.

🎀 kittie??? using capital letters?? well i never. i present the much awaited father figure joel fic! it’s also a bff!ellie fic! double homicide. warning: it’s pretty angsty in some places, mentions of your birth father being a shitty guy, mention of alcohol (unrelated to your dad), all around daddy issues, ellie’s kind of a dick in this, fem!reader, reader is a woman luver, this is NOT hate towards dina she is simply just there, lemme know if i missed anything! p.s i’m trying out adding little cover pics to my fic, tried to make this one have the same vibes as like a journal / diary entry with stickers n stuff ? ok bye

Ellie was an everywhere kind of girl. She was strong, capable, intelligent, and always knew what to do. To you, she was truly a superhero around Jackson, always making sure that everyone was safe and doing her best to take on the jobs she thought was too dangerous for everyone else. Her selflessness was what drew you to her in a romantic sense in the first place, not that she had any idea. In her eyes, the two of you were long time best friends who grew up together — experiencing just about everything together, and you were certain to her that’s all it was. You’d liked her since you’d met.

For the most part, it didn’t suck. getting to be close with Ellie made it worth it, smoking together, laughing, and sometimes even playfully flirting (the butterflies in your stomach can attest to this.) There were hard times of course, Ellie getting with other girls and telling you all about them, the fact she probably saw you as a little sister, and most recently — she’d gotten super busy. So busy, that you had to start going out of your way just to say hi to her each day, always running about Jackson to find her. To you, it was worth it. You missed her.

“Boo!” Two hands grabbed you from behind as you swept the hay in the barn making you yelp and turn around with a wide eyed expression. “Totally got you.” Ellie smirked, backing off. She wore her khaki green jacket that you loved over her hoodie, done up with her jeans and her backpack on.

“What’re you doing here?” You asked softly, chest swelling with affection. She stepped around you, going to pat one of the horses as greeting.

“Thought I’d stop by, about to head out on patrol.” She took a carrot from the feeding tray and fed it to the horse.

“You always seem to be on patrol.” You smiled, and you cursed yourself at how it came out. It sounded kind of bitter, and shit — maybe you were a little bitter— but you knew it wasn’t ultimately her fault that you felt neglected. Perceptive as ever, Ellie turned her head towards you quickly wearing guilt on her face.

“I’m sorry, dude. I miss hanging out.” She took a step towards you and you let yourself sulk, turning your back to her and continuing to sweep. “I do.” She took another step closer.

“Don’t call me dude. I’m a girl.” You were being a little pathetic now, punishing her when she didn’t fully deserve it.

“Since when?” She chuckled and you whipped your head to her in shock, a look of anger and disbelief accidentally showcased in your expression. “I mean since when did you care about me calling you dude?”

When you didn’t respond, Ellie sighed— stepping up directly behind you. “Alright, I didn’t wanna have to do this. But I’m gonna have to call in reinforcements from the tickle monster.” She spoke seriously, and before you got the chance to protest this her hands were jabbing into your waist, fingers wiggling up and down your ribs as you squealed, a smile making a breakthrough onto your face as if despite everything your body couldn’t help but enjoy her touch.

“Ellie stop!” You chortled, your hands falling loose on the broom. Before it fell, Ellie reached around and caught it before swinging it round and hiding it behind her back. You spun around to her, lurching forward to try and grab it but instead just stepping right up close into her space.

It seemed like everything froze, just like that. Your faces were close and her eyes were boring into yours — the green of them almost painfully bright today, her cheeks looking like they’d caught a bit of sun, hair jostled in her messy half bun from all the commotion. You blinked up at her, collecting yourself as she smiled back smugly.

“Give my broom back.” You breathed out, confidence slightly lost at the close proximity.

“One condition.” She whispered and you leant on your hip with an attitude, tilting your head at her as if to say ‘what?’. She sucked in a breath, and you swear her eyes flickered to your lips for just a second but you might have imagined it. “Stop being mad at me. Let’s hang out.” She proposed and your heart fluttered. Finally.

“Alright.” You muttered with a shy smile and she tilt her head, grin widening.

“Yeah?” She seemed equally excited, and you felt elated. You had gotten in your own head a little with Ellie being so busy, thinking that maybe she’d been busy for a reason — trying to politely get you off her back. This was the confirmation you’d needed that you were overthinking, as usual.

“Remember how you said you were gonna teach me about skin… care…stuff? Let’s do it. It’s about time I start acting like a girl.” She chuckled, stepping back and breaking the tension of your closeness a little. You stepped back too, a little flushed from the moment and nodded happily. Footsteps approached the barn, capturing your attention for a moment before you rushed to organise your little hang out session.

“Tonight? At mine?”

Ellie’s head was turned towards the door, distracted by Dina poking her head around and realising she had been keeping her waiting. Her head snapped back to you as she wiped her hands down on her jeans nodding.

“Yeah, cool. I gotta get going but I’ll see you, yeah? It’s a date.” She rambled out, walking backwards for a moment to face you before turning around as you bid her farewell. You tried not to overthink the ‘it’s a date.’

Night time rolled around, and you were cringing at yourself in the mirror. It was just going to be a chill little night in with Ellie, the same way it always was since you’d had your own place in Jackson— but you’d put in a little extra effort to look cute, despite wearing just a tank top and pyjama pants. You did your hair all pretty, applying a little bit of makeup you’d made yourself from ingredients, which you’d learnt how to make from a book about female prisoners. You felt cute, and you were hoping Ellie might think the same— but you didn’t wanna get ahead of yourself.

A knock at your door sounded a little while into the night, and you tried to quell the relieved butterflies tearing through your stomach by taking a deep breath, heading out your room to answer it. You swung the door open, expecting Ellie — only to be met with Joel. Your smile faltered for no more than a second, wondering how long Ellie’s patrol was going on for before fixing your face, not wanting to hurt his feelings.

Joel was what you thought every man should be. You’d first met him and Ellie a few days outside of Jackson when they were trying to find Joel’s brother, Tommy. You were headed to Jackson too to find the only person that might’ve been alive in your family, your dad. You were no more than a year younger than Ellie, out there all by yourself and Joel couldn’t let you continue on that way. You were headed to the same place, so he let you tag along — plus, he figured Ellie might want a friend. So it turned out, your dad wasn’t the greatest guy. He was just as neglectful and angry since the last time you’d seen him as a child. After causing more damage, he packed up with his new family and left the safe haven of Jackson to live in a warmer climate (for whatever reason.) You were just a kid, a damaged and lonely kid — and Joel being the man he was, stepped up. He wasn’t just caring for Ellie, he now had you on his hands— making sure your needs were met and you were living comfortably in your new residence. The two of you had grown close over the years, he was the closest thing to a father you ever had.

“Y’asked to borrow sugar for those cookies you said you’d make for Maria’s thing?” He drawled, swinging his backpack off his shoulder to dig through it— having remembered the favour you’d briefly asked of him a week ago. “Got a whole tub of it, right here. Don’t let anyone else see that, they’ll come knockin’ and you’ll be out again in no time.” He presented you with a wooden tub, filled to the brim with brown sugar. Your expression softened, taking it in your hands as you looked up at him gratefully.

“Knew I could count on you, old man.” you grinned, the nickname you and Ellie had so kindly gifted him never losing its charm. He nodded, shy of affection but smiled anyway — your sweet ways poking him right in the soft spot. He stepped back to walk away, and before he could go any further your voice cut through, stopping him in his tracks.

“Joel.” you shot out, almost urgently. God, you felt a little desperate.

“Yeah?” He gruffed, and you paused for a moment, brows furrowed as you started to realise how late it was actually getting. Was Ellie coming at all? He saw right through your expression, knowing that something had to be bothering you. Joel stepped a little closer, tilting his head at your far away expression. “What’s up, kiddo?” Any other time you’d smile at the nickname. Ellie was kid, and you were kiddo. That, or ‘thing one’ and ‘thing two’ from that old Cat in the Hat book he’d shown you.

“Have you seen Ellie tonight, at all?” you gnawed on your bottom lip, trying to hide your concern and failing. Joel seemed to falter, his eyes skimming from you to behind you, noticing how you’d set up your living room. Jars of the skincare, face masks, the lot of it — laid out on the coffee table. Bowls of snacks sat out, untouched, with blankets strewn about to make the couch look comfy and fun. You’d even hung up some fairy lights that had been a pain to find batteries for if he remembers correctly, you begging him to always look for them on his hunts. He was piecing things together a little when your voice dragged his attention back to you, your frown deepening. “It’s just, she said she was gonna come round and hang out with me tonight. ‘Was gonna teach her about skin care. We haven’t hung out in ages and I guess… I just thought…” You trailed off, Joel’s eyes dropping down to his shoes briefly.

“Yeah, uh.” He cleared his throat a little awkwardly, unsure how to approach the situation that he was realising to be more delicate than he thought. “Saw ‘er at the bar with that Dina on the way over here. They… were gettin’ pretty wasted.” He sounded apologetic, like he knew just how pathetic you were and you couldn’t stop your face from falling — rejection and humiliation swiftly settling in making your cheeks heat up.

“Oh.” Your eyes widened, before they dropped away from Joel’s pitying gaze. “Yeah, makes sense I mean they were just on patrol together.” You rushed out a chuckle, hand resting back on your door like you wanted to close it. “Well thanks for stopping by with the sugar Joel, you’re the best.” You hurried, backing up so you could send him away, not wanting to give away how upset you were. It was no use though, Joel knew you. He knew the look on your face all too well, that same look of rejection on your face that he’d seen when your dad was still around. You had tells, your face would go all tight and rigid like you were afraid any display of emotion might send you hurtling over the edge into tears. Joel placed his hand on the door before you had even made an attempt to shut it, gazing at you for a moment trying to find the right words to say. It wasn’t often he had to do this kind of thing, a dad duty.

“You uh— you got room for me in there? I’m startin’ to look a little old, maybe I could… benefit from this typ’a thing.” He suggested, voice serious like it always was with a softness to his expression. You stared back at him, slightly surprised but considering it. You could send him away, spend the rest of the night in tears and eating all the snacks you’d prepared, or… “Until Ellie decides to show her sorry ass, of course.” He added, throwing in a jokey smile at the end. Joel smiling was rare, so when he did smile you always found it contagious. You pushed your door open wider, stepping aside.

“Welcome to my spa, mister Miller.”

Before long, Joel’s coat and boots were kicked off at your door and he was sat on your couch, your cold hands smearing your home made face mask over his face.

“You really need to shave. This beard is what’s making you look old.” You joked, the pink goo narrowly avoiding his beard hairs as you rubbed it into his cheek.

“Yeah yeah, you try findin’ a razor that’s worth shit around here.” He shook his head making you tut at his movement obstructing your application. “This supposed to burn?” He frowned, pointing to his face. Your eyes widened, pulling back. You were sure you had made it hypoallergenic, but the book you learnt how to make it from was pretty dated — maybe it was wrong. He chuckled at your expression, relaxing. “m’fuckin with ya, kiddo.”

You scrunched your nose angrily, scooping out some product and smearing it over his mouth so he couldn’t talk, his reaction to this making you burst out laughing. He wiped it off with the back of his hand, glaring at you, scrunching his own face up in disgust.

“Tastes like shit.”

“Well that’s because you’re not supposed to eat it, it’s to replenish the moisture barrier in your skin.” You enunciated, repeating what you’d read in your book proudly.

“To what?” He sarked and you rolled your eyes playfully, prodding his cheek gently to get him to turn it.

“No more questions. Let me finish this, grandpa.” You concentrated, applying the rest of the face mask to his skin. You leant back, admiring his glossy pink mask, all done. “Well, don’t you look pretty.” You held back your laugh, and he reached up to gently touch the sticky layer over his skin.

“What, you ain’t got no cucumbers for my eyes?” he leant back in his seat and you laughed at the imagery as you picked up your hand mirror, beginning to apply the face mask to your own skin.

“C’mon now Joel. You know that cucumbers are a luxury this time of year, I’m not wasting them on you.” You scooped out product, smoothing the refreshing slime across your cheek. He chuckled, raising his eyebrows as if to say ‘fair enough’ before falling quiet. You glanced his way, nodding at the popcorn bowl on the table. “Help yourself to the snacks, or i’m just gonna eat them all.” You chuckled lightly. He didn’t, as expected— arms crossed over his chest.

“So what do I do now? Just wait?” He looked around, taking in the way you’d decorated the place with hopes to impress Ellie. His heart was old and damaged, but it twinged in sympathy for you — knowing her repeated absence was probably weighing on you, the pair of you once joined at the hip.

“Yeah, it’ll dry and then you can peel it right off.” You smiled, your focus now centred in on making sure you didn’t get the mask in your eyebrows.

“Kiddo, I’m sorry you got stood up.” He turned to look at you and your movements froze, turning to look back at him caught off guard.

“Really, Joel— it’s okay, and I really appreciate you being here.” You smile, trying to convince him that you weren’t hurt by Ellie ditching you for Dina, the pure existence of the dark haired girl filling you with nerves and slight insecurity.

“But you’d rather her be here, right?” You wanted to put your defensives up, but his thick comforting accent made you sigh— putting down the jar and mirror, finished on your face. It was hard not to tell Joel the truth, maybe it would feel good to talk to someone about it. You opened your mouth to speak, and he cut you off. “You like’er.” He stated, and your words died in your throat. Surely he wasn’t calling you out like that?

“Of course I like Ellie, she’s my—”

“Not… like that. You love her.”

Your throat closed up and you blinked, how the fuck did he know? You said nothing, confirming his suspicions with your silence and your eyes got a little glassy, sure that this ordeal was making you look even more pathetic than before.

“And, hell— I want you to know it’s alright by me. Not that you need my permission or anythin’ but— i’m… i’m good with the gay stuff, always have been. N’ you two make sense together. I think i’ve always kinda known.” His forehead line deepened as he tried to word things sensitively, being gentle not exactly his forte.

“Well… thanks Joel. i’m sure i’ll just… get over it.”

“What I’m sayin’ is… You can talk to me. Alright?”

“Alright.”

You’d helped Joel peel off the mask, and now you were applying a cooling moisturiser that you’d made to his skin that was a little pink from the peel. “Now you’d better not go around tellin’ anyone I’d had a spa day with you. Don’t wanna damage my reputation.” He weakly threatened you as you smoothed the pearly product into his rough skin. Times like this, when he was going back and forth with you in such a humorous way made it easy to forget what he was capable of, how many people he’d killed effortlessly.

“And what’s your reputation. Grumpy old man?” You raised an eyebrow making him chuckle.

“Watch it.”

You moved on to apply the product to your own face, and he picked up your hand mirror, checking out your handiwork. To him, he looked the same — just a little shinier, though he wasn’t sure what he was expecting. A comfortable silence fell over you as you smoothed the product into your skin, reaching forward with your other hand and stuffing some popcorn into your mouth. His chuckle faded into a fond smile as he watched you miss your mouth with some of the kernels, giggling to yourself.

“You and Sarah would’a got on.”

Maybe he was feeling sentimental, it was always harder not to face your emotions later on in the night — and perhaps the ambience of your home that you’d made was reminding him of old times. You slowed your movements, as if you’d move too fast and burst his bubble of reminiscing. You wanted Joel to feel comfortable like he’d made you. You even chewed slower to be quieter, staying silent to let him speak as he stared into space at one of the lit candles on your fireplace. “She always liked doin’ this kinda thing. I always said no. Was too much of a manly man.” He scoffed with a sad smile at the silliness behind his reason, shaking his head slightly in regret.

“I would have liked to know her.” You admit softly, staring at his profile— still glowy from the product you’d applied.

“She was all girly, like you. Always wearin’ pink n’ purple. Would’a been the best of friends.” He finally turned to look at you, his eyes a little sad and glossy at the distant and lost possibility. Yours were too, you couldn’t imagine his loss— Joel never spoke about Sarah. You realised now, that he was sharing something vulnerable with you because you’d been brave enough to fess up to something vulnerable too that night, which made your heart expand in size by ten. For tonight, your Ellie wound was patched up by Joel. You touched his arm, and you shared a smile.

Joel stood with his boots on, pulling his coat on at the door — having just reached midnight and he figured it wasn’t appropriate to stay any longer.

“You feeling like a new man after that facial?” You jabbed with a grin. He chuckled, buttoning up his thick jacket preparing for the snowy weather.

“Damn right.” He went along with it making you laugh. He stood up straight after pulling his backpack on his back, looking down at you with more sincerity now. “You gonna be alright kiddo? Can talk to her if you want but I reckon you… got it handled.” He trailed off knowingly when your eyes widened at the suggestion.

“No, I’m sure me and her will talk… and i’m okay, thanks Joel.” You nod at him with more meaning than you’re both willing to address again and he nods back.

“I’ll see you.”

Jackson was quiet that time of night, watching his step as to not slip on melted ice. Joel’s eyes flit up from his boots to the figure fumbling away from the bar on the path towards the living spaces. Ellie, drunk as a skunk hobbling home, Dina in the distance stumbling her separate way.

“Ellie.” Joel greet, stepping up behind her and she swung around, gleefully throwing her arms up.

“Joel!”

“Let’s get you home.” He nodded, stepping by her side to make sure she didn’t fall and hurt herself. He wasn’t mad at her, she probably didn’t even know — but he couldn’t help but sigh at her thoughtless, joyful mood.

“Why’re you out so late, old man?” Ellie slurred slightly, head bowed to watch her step carefully.

“Don’t you worry about me kid.” He took a hold of her arm when she stumbled lightly, having lost the card game one too many times with Dina. Dina had needed cheering up after a spat with Jesse, and Ellie had stepped up to help being the good friend she was. It was mainly to get her to stop whining about it on their shared patrol trips.

“You had plans tonight. Shouldn’t’ve been in there gettin’ wasted. You know that.” His voice was quiet but meaningful and Ellie’s head rose from its position, staring ahead with a confused expression before it settled in realisation, saying your name.

“Shit.” She swore, wiping a hand down her face as she arrived at her house, right beside Joel’s. The thought of blowing you off so badly seemed sobering and she climbed the porch step, fumbling for her keys and turning to look at the man stood before her, even in her drunk state recognising the fatherly look of disappointment on his face. “Was she mad?” She squint and Joel stepped back.

“No.” He confirmed and she sighed, watching him for a moment. “Make it right, Ellie.” He nodded, before departing to his own house. Ellie sighed once more. She’d fucked up, bad.

♡ ♡ ♡

[milfjuulpod]

Guidance, Ch II

lunch, coffee, perfume, emails

read chapter one here

A/N: heyyyy sorry for my absence my writers block is insane rn….anyways i hope y’all enjoy the second chapter, lmk how u feel abt it and what u wanna see! also- i have posted both of these chapters on my ao3, same username. ok here u go bye

-

The office you resided in was dark, a soft light illuminating from the computer screen, gentle music playing from its speakers. The desk was littered with papers, folders, notes, pens—it was quite the mess. Ava had dropped off a stack of reports on students, those who were falling a bit behind and needed a bit of help. So naturally, you quickly got to work. You knew when you arrived at Abbott that you wanted to help as much as possible, and there was no point in waiting to get started. Sure, it was only the first couple of weeks, but you figured it was best to get a head start on things.

Thus, you launched yourself into work. Most of these students had struggled all last year, and you decided to take some preventative measures to help both the students and teachers. Organizing the files into different piles, you heard a knock at the door. You invited whoever it was inside, and were met with a delightful surprise. “Hi Melissa, how can I help you?” You asked, taking your eyes off of the mess sprawled in front of you. “I think you might be the one who needs help, kid, what's all of this?” She asked, almost laughing at how disheveled your workspace was.

You sighed and leaned back in your chair, as Melissa took place in the seat across from you. “Ava dropped off some files on students, so I’m trying to make plans for them for this year.” She looked at you with such care at that moment, before returning to her usual demeanor. “Well don’t run yourself into the ground before we get halfway into the school year, I have a feeling your desk is gonna look like this a lot,” she teased. You replied with a quiet yes, and went to turn the music down before Melissa stopped you.

“Hold on, is that Italian?” She asked, trying to hide the smile on her face. Glancing at the screen, you realized what was playing. “Yeah, it's called Salvatore, by Lana Del Rey, I listen to this song a lot.” Her smile grew at your statement, and took mental note of it. At this point, you wondered why Melissa came in here, she still has yet to say. As if she read your mind, she spoke again. “I came to bring this to you, I had some extra and wasn’t sure if you’d eaten already, and I’m gonna guess you haven’t,” She gestured to the desk once again before setting down a tupperware in front of you. As she stood up to take her leave, she said, “I hope you like this Italian food as much as you like listening to the language,” and walked out of your office. You felt nearly as warm as the food sitting in front of you. 

       

When five p.m. rolled around, you figured it was about time to call it. Many plans were made for students, the rest would have to wait until tomorrow. You packed up your things to leave, when you remembered the tupperware sitting on the edge of your desk. Melissa’s tupperware. Hoping she didn’t leave, you grabbed it and rushed to her door. Unfortunately, her lights were off and the door was locked. Looks like that will have to wait until tomorrow too. 

      On the way out, you were stopped by Janine. “Hey! how’s the first week going?” She asked, excited as ever. You told her about the work you had done, and what was still left to do. “I just gotta take this home and wash it now, it’s Melissa’s.” Janine’s eyes widened at that statement, making you feel like maybe you said something you shouldn’t have. “Oh, Melissa gave you that? It took weeks before she even remembered my name, let alone give me something,” She shuffled on her feet nervously. “I hope she’s not trying to butter you up for anything,” Janine’s rambling was cut off by Gregory pulling up to the two of you. “I’ll see you tomorrow!” 

      Walking to your own car, you wondered what Janine could’ve meant by that. Melissa had been nothing but kind to you, what could possibly make her say that? Sure, the older teacher had a bit of a tough exterior, but she already took a liking to you. Janine’s words echoed in your head, and the anxiety grew as you thought about what Melissa really wanted from you. 

        

The following morning, you walked to Melissa’s classroom with her clean tupperware and coffees in hand. One for you, one for her. You were just going to return her dish, give her the coffee, and leave. Nothing more, nothing less. The crush on her was a bit ridiculous at this point, you barely knew the redhead, and yet you wanted nothing more but to learn everything. Knocking lightly on the door, you let yourself in. “Good morning, you left yesterday before I could give this back to you. Oh, and here’s a coffee as a thank you.” You greeted Melissa with excitement. Except she didn’t match the energy, at all. She didn’t even look up from her computer as she quietly said “thank you.” 

        Okay, maybe you were planning on staying a bit longer and chatting with her before getting to your own work, and you felt a bit defeated. Silently, you left the classroom and walked to your own office, wondering if Janine was right about Melissa. It was hard to focus on work feeling this way, and slowly, but surely, it was lunch time. Opting to work through it, you didn’t visit the break room with everyone else. You missed Melissa anxiously looking for you in the break room. But her best friend didn’t. 

        

“Why do you keep looking at the door? Are you waiting for someone?” Barbara asked the woman next to her. Melissa glanced at the cameras, before deciding to lie. “Uh, no. Just…paying attention. You can never be too careful.” Barbara knew what that tone meant, but decided to let it go. Playing the events from this morning back in her mind, Melissa felt a little bad for ignoring you, and this made her upset. Why did she care? 

      “You’re shaking the whole table bouncing your leg, Melissa. What’s going on?” Barbara questioned. Melissa just sighed in response and leaned back in her chair. With a stern look from her friend, she started talking. “I don’t know. That new guidance counselor came by this morning to return my tupperware and I was busy so I didn’t really say much. And then she just left, but what was I supposed to do? She got me coffee too, I didn’t even realize until she was gone. It was good though, I haven’t been to the place she got it from. Maybe I should ask her where it is? Or…I don’t know…” The redhead trailed off. Across from her, Barbara tried her best to hide the shock from hearing her friend’s words. 

       “Why are you overthinking this? I’m sure she’s fine and wouldn’t mind you inquiring about the coffee. Go, before the break is over and I have to hear about this all over again tomorrow morning.” Barbara laughed as Melissa rolled her eyes, but she stood up to go searching. 

     

  You, on the other hand, decided to pick up a sandwich from the corner store across the street for lunch. Upon returning, you nearly jumped out of your skin when you opened the office door. “Melissa! Oh good god you scared me, what are you doing in here?” You whisper-screamed, adrenaline still rushing for a moment. “I had a question for ya,” she replied, so casually. As if it was normal for her to sneak into your office while you were out. Come to think of it, you remember locking the door, how exactly did she get in?

       “A question that couldn’t wait for me to get back from the store? And that’s my chair, scooch it,” You set the sandwich on the desk and leaned against it as well waiting for Melissa to move out of your seat. She didn’t. “Sorry for being so short with you this morning, kid. I was a little overwhelmed with making plans for both of my classes, but thank you for the coffee, that was sweet.” She smiled at you sincerely, and if this is what you get for buying her a coffee, it might become a daily thing. “Where did you get it by the way?”

        “Oh! It’s this new place that just opened up by my apartment, Opus. I’ve been a few times already, might become a regular there,” you told her. “Yeah, that makes two of us.” Melissa stood up to leave, and without thinking, you grabbed her hand to stop her. “Wait! Did you say both of your classes? You have two?” 

        Melissa was visibly surprised at your physical touch, but she didn’t pull back either. “Yeah, a combined second and third grade class. Gonna be a great year,” She informed you, rolling her eyes in the process. You let go of her hand finally and took in what she said. “If you need any help, with lesson plans or grading, you know where to find me.” 

        The teacher took your hand again and gently squeezed it before letting go, “Thanks hon, I’ll keep that in mind. And next time you need lunch, you know where to find me,” She said with a smirk before walking out the door. Sitting down, you took in the smell of her perfume that coated the area for a few moments more. The sweet scent was quickly forgotten when you looked at your computer screen. Many emails, forgotten assignments, but what caught your eye immediately, was a new email, from Melissa of all people. 

       Forgot to ask while I was still with you, but would you want to meet this afternoon or later this week to help me with some planning? Maybe we can enjoy a coffee inside the shop this time. Let me know. 

-Melissa Schemmenti

[meowmeowriley]

Dude... Does this count as NSFW? Well I'm gonna ask anyway and you can decide. I'm not sure how you feel about the reproductive possibility %, if it changes at all with Bun!Ghost. But I'm imagining Bun!Ghost who gets classically moody/impatient/entitled during mating season. Tries to hide it but around Soap he fails miserably. And the end result is Ghost and Soap with an entire litter of these adorable little babies.

I don't even know how that works, trans Ghost? I love that. Sorry I'm dumping and running (like Soap 😳) but the idea of them having a large litter was just too adorable a mental picture not to share. Bye bye now.

Mmmmmmmm i think Tumblr will let us talk about it, it's fine. 😁 and Ghost is trans in this fic, I was persuaded and honestly it works so well.

Rabbit breeding season is all summer long, practically half the year. It doesn't take a genius to notice the difference in Ghost as soon as fall sets in, and he suddenly mellows out. It hadn't always been a problem. Before he found himself attracted to Soap, he did just fine satisfying himself quickly and quietly. Once he'd realized he was so drawn to Soap, so desperate for him, he was doomed. His mood stayed a bit more sour because he couldn't have the man for himself, and he frequently came back to base from leave smelling like other rabbits that were also ready to breed. How very dare he.

Now I don't wanna give too much away, but I will say there will be no babies between the two, for plot reasons. However, that doesn't stop Soap from dreaming about it, once they get together.

Soap hadn't realized before finally bagging Ghost that he really liked the idea of having a few kids. He didn't care about gender, they could decide that for themselves. He wanted to teach them all there was about all he knew. How to draw, how to fight, how to shoot, how to skin a rab-... oh. Okay maybe not that.

He finds himself imagining how weird it would be, to be half rabbit and then find out that half your family makes a living killing them. Would the kids resent him for that? Would they fear him? It keeps him up at night, long after Ghost had nodded off, loafing beside or on top of Soap. (Sometimes shifted, sometimes not. Sometimes he's a full ass man sleeping curled up with his knees and arms underneath himself, face down in the mattress or Soap's gut. Fluffy bunny tail peeking out of the band of his sleep pants. Sorry, I got sidetracked 😅)

Maybe it's just as well they won't be having kids together. The implications of his own offspring looking at him like Simon's family does, like he could snap at any moment, skin and eat them alive. It makes him sick to his stomach.

It doesn't stop him from doing his best to keep Ghost satisfied during breeding season, but he does start to get a bit melancholic when Ghost murmurs about getting bred like a rabbit should in the heat of the moment. He doesn't mean it, he's just caught up in hormones. Tis the season. They rarely address their embarrasing pillow talk outside of doing the deed. Ghost doesn't actually want to get pregnant, he loves his career. Soap hates the idea of being seen as a monster by his own flesh and blood. They won't have children.

Sorry I took your wholesome happy family daydream and ruined it 😂 but thats what I do. Shouldn't stop you, Soap, or anyone from dreaming about them having a huge family of bun babies though!

[the-alien-stage]

This round has left me speechless. I watched it twice, with subtitles on and one without and so now let's get straight into the analysis. My hands are still shaking.

To begin, the human experimentation isn't as touched on as we thought, however it DOES foreshadow what the fuck is gonna happen in Luka's round. That, at least, seems to be what they are building up to.

This melody they have eeriely resembles what Ivan had for his round, which makes this all the more tragic. The lyrics themselves, however, are a mix of the two boys. Both of them had love songs, but Till's portion is more rough around the edges with it like his song while Ivan is straight to the point.

While they don't focus on human experimentation, it does seem to look like there was an intermission phase where both of the boys were advertised. This shows a soft moment between the two as Till lays unconscious and Ivan huddles up to him and does a very awkward cuddle.

Now, getting to the part where we all kind of lost our shit. Ivan sees the scoreboard off screen, looks at his mic and the Till and throws it as he walks to Till and makes out with him. This isn't an exaggeration, as a kiss implies one but he does multiple.

Till at first doesn't realize what is happening, he is still very much traumatized and zoned out over what happened to Mizi. Even the aliens that are caring for him seem to be hanging it over him. Whether they know his feelings for her or are just doing it because he is another contestant, who knows.

However, once he gets a handle on things, he pushes Ivan away who comes right back. This is when Ivan "chokes" Till and this, I took note of. Ivan does a specific hold, a safe-choke hold, when choking somebody that isn't actually choking the person. He purposely does this to protect Till and to fool the audience. This is when he begins to get shot at, the entire time his eyes are on Till.

I think it's also important to mention that they are wearing black and white, complete contrasts. However, it mimics Sua and Mizi who had the same fate. Sua and Ivan even had an interaction before all of this at Anakt Garden where Ivan made fun of her wanting to sacrifice herself for Mizi, and yet he shows himself to be a hypocrite as he smiles at Till before closing his eyes one last time.

Till has advanced to the next round to go against Luka and quite frankly, I'm terrified on how it's going to end. Mizi is a peace keeper but Luka was able to push her to violence. Till also has a personal vendetta against the blond for pushing Mizi. This won't end well.

Finally, for those that didn't watch till the end (HA), Dewey and Isaac are freaking out as their walkie-talkie system seems to be going off because Hyuna got injured. Mizi is fretting over her as she tries to stop the blood flow but it does seem that they have gotten caught.

Theory wise, I'm going to think that Hyuna is going to make Mizi a. Run or b. Hide to protect her as she gets taken away, and that's going to get her into Round 7.

Okay bye, I haven't emotionally recovered from Round 6 sorry pookies

[sailing-through-hawkins]

i got a much bigger response to my Harrington Charms Hellfire post than i expected so i wrote a little something that was along the lines of what i was thinking!

Part 1 ✧ Part 2 ✧ Part 3 ✧ Part 4 ✧ AO3

Sometimes Eddie thinks the real Upside-Down is his life after they close up the gates and pulverize Vecna ("they" in this situation being superhero Jane Hopper and the rest of her merry band of warriors), because past-Eddie would probably have a breakdown over...well, everything.

For one thing, Eddie is currently in the passenger seat of none other than Steve Harrington's Beemer, at the man's very request himself.

"Wait, I'll drop you off."

"'Preciate the thought, Steve but -"

"Munson. It's been like two weeks since you even started walking by yourself, sorry if I'm kinda worried about letting you go across town without me."

"Uh...just you?"

"Any of us, but me specifically since I'm clearly everyone's chauffeur. Might as well play the role, right?"

It's been like a month and every time Eddie wants to go anywhere in the slowly rebuilding town, Steve's right there with him. It'd be infuriating if it wasn't so obvious he liked doing it. If Steve wasn't so intent on just making sure Eddie's alright and yeah the mother-henning should have gotten old by now but if Eddie even thinks about telling him to stop, all he sees is sad eyes and hunched shoulders hiding under a complacent smile and wave bye-bye. God those eyes are fucking weapons.

They're heading over to Gareth's garage for a light-hearted band session. It's funny because Dustin was the one who convinced Eddie to "get your head out of your ass and talk to your friends, dick" and actually reach out to the rest of Hellfire about the whole 'not a murderer OR dead' thing. After some apologizing (ugh) and grovelling (double ugh), the rest of his sheep were willing to forgive him for ignoring their calls and visits while he was in recovery. Provided, of course, that he continue to check in with them on a bi-weekly basis at minimum. It's unfortunate that Steve, for all his head trauma, makes sure that Eddie actually sticks to that basis.

The things he does for love.

Or no, not love, definitely not love, it is way too fucking soon to call this teensy little infatuation anything as huge as love. No. Not love at all.

They're about to reach Gareth's place, that's important. By the time Steve rolls to a stop outside the garage, Eddie's panic (not panic, just a strong argument, this is not love) has simmered down. He has to take his time getting out of the car today, thank whatever deity is out there for quick-feet Steve, who runs around the front to help Eddie out onto his two feet. It's been a rough week but he had way worse back in that first month at the hospital, not to mention needing a little Steve-assistance isn't the worst thing in the world.

"Hey!"

Eddie blinks as Steve helps him lean against the car, the spots in his vision fading away to reveal Gareth right up in his space with a murderous gaze directed right at Steve.

Eddie worries that he's gonna start a fight even though it's been months since he's introduced Steve as his live-in-nurse (nobody takes Eddie's hints at a sexy nurse uniform to heart thankfully, he doesn't know what he'd do if Steve caught on that he's only half-joking) and Steve's been doing the best he can to make amends with Hellfire.

At least the guys aren't walking on eggshells around him anymore, judging by how Gareth barely took a glance to assess Eddie's wellbeing before going back to glaring at Steve with eyes ready to kill. Well fuck you too Gareth.

He crosses his arms, eyes burning with resentment as he continues go stare down a pretty nonchalant Steve who is very much in Eddie's space as he also leans against the car, fuck he's so close. When Eddie glances at him to scope out what the fuck is happening, he sees that gaze again. The gaze that reminds Eddie of Steve's days as King, looking over his reigning population with a boredom teetering on malicious negligence. That gaze used to send Eddie's mind into hysterics, painting images of crowding into the King's space just to see those big brown eyes waver. But that's not how it is anymore, Steve's eyes are usually brimming with concern, irritation or a spark of contentment as he watches his little nuggets run around screaming about Eddie's latest one-shot campaign.

Right now, there's no screaming teenagers. It's just silence for a few moments, a tension building in Eddie's bones until he thinks this must be what it's like to watch a sports match, head running back-and-forth between the two teams and waiting with baited breath.

"So?" Gareth spits out, squinting at Steve, just tilts his head in response and lets a few strands of perfect fall into his eyes, damn that bastard. Gareth grits his teeth and takes a breath, "What did you think?"

Steve watches Gareth, as if assessing his line delivery, shifting so he fully faces him but is still totally in Eddie's space with a hand on the car roof behind Eddie and the other crooked up on Steve's hip. The motion lets Eddie smell his aftershave and fuck, Steve still runs so warm. Whatever he finds in Gareth has to be what he wants because he gives them both a half-lidded smirk and shrugs his shoulders. "Eh, wasn't that into it."

Gareth sputters, face turning crimson and Eddie is like super confused because what the fuck is going on right now? 

Steve is the one to fully break his brain with a laugh that throws his head back, his neck stretching out so the light hits his jawline perfectly, that bastard. He looks back at Gareth's flushed face with a sunny grin that sets fire to Eddie's veins. "You totally liked it, didn't you?"

Eddie snaps his head to Gareth, who squirms before dropping his shoulders. His little mutter of, "Yeah, I did," sounds so defeated that Eddie feels a second-hand guilt, but over what? He has no fucking clue.

That small pit of guilt quickly dissolves into even more confusion when Steve laughs again, kicking himself off his car to land a hand on Gareth's shoulder and fucking wink at Eddie. "The miracle of Grease, huh Munson?"

Record-scratch. Sorry, what?

"Sorry, what?" Eddie snaps his eyes from the grinning god that is Steve and the sulking fluster that is a member of his club, one of his friends, one of his very overprotective sheep who has hated Steve's guts for a long time and is now letting the guy give him a fucking noogie in broad daylight with empty complaints.

"Looks like I've been corrupting your crew, Eds, if Gary being a Greaser -"

"I am NOT a Greaser, I just -"

Gary? Steve calls Gareth the Great...Gary? And he doesn't even comment on it? Last time Jeff tried that, Gareth threatened to hide a spider in his guitar case. But Steve Harrington, someone Gareth has had no qualms about verbally tearing apart, does it and it's fine?

"Eds? Hey, Eddie." And now Steve's looking at him with that concern-rotten gaze, eyes flitting over every inch of Eddie's face as if to pinpoint what's wrong and fix it with a smile and a soft you're okay now, I've got you. "Back with me?"

Swallowing down an incessant I'm always with you, sweetheart, Eddie nods. In his peripheral, Gareth is watching him with his hands out as if to catch Eddie from falling. Which is stupid because Eddie hasn't fallen from light-headedness in like two days (Eddie shuts up the part of his brain that reminds him Gareth wouldn't know that with a part that says Dustin probably gives the whole club daily medical chart updates) and wait fuck is that Steve's hand on his neck right now?

"So!" Eddie claps his hands, eye twitching as Steve's hand slowly trails to his shoulder, lingering for a moment before he takes it off entirely. Stupid jock bastard with his touchy-ness and his smile and - "What's this I hear about Grease, Gary?"

Oh yeah, there's that livid face of watch out for the tarantula bitch, Eddie's missed that. Well, Gareth still does it everyday but not at Eddie for a while there, probably because of the whole intensive injury recovery shit. Oh well. "None of your -"

"Gareth and I made a bet," Steve clamps his hand back onto Gareth to shove them closer together, pointedly ignoring Gareth glare of betrayal. The space on the back of Eddie's neck still burns with the ghost of Steve's touch, something ugly in his chest snarling at how that touch is now on Gareth's arm. He wonders if the bats left him with more than bites sometimes. "About some movies we recommended each other. And since I won, that means -"

"No way, I'm not -"

"Uh yeah you are, I won so -"

"Fuck you, Harrington -"

"Not on the first date, hotshot," Steve laughs as Gareth tries wrangling out of his hold, holding onto him by his shoulders with one gloriously bulging forearm. Eddie's starting to think the light-headedness might be a symptom of something other than his brush with the bats. Oh don't think about the bats, bad move, bad move. "Didn't know you raised a cheater, Eddie."

Steve's eyes are glowing with mirth, his grin wide as Gareth threatens to bite him with a smile of his own. And that's. Huh?

"And I didn't know you two were so close," Eddie manages to cough out, snapping his gaze to Gareth with a raised eyebrow. He squirms again, ducking out of Steve's grasp (Eddie can't imagine why anyone would want to) and dusting off his shirt. "Holding out on me, Harrington?"

Steve shrugs, his eyes fixating right next to Eddie's eyes. He steps closer, a firm and warm presence right in Eddie's space, right in front of him, and raises a hand to caress Eddie's hair, that fucker. Eddie stifles his gasp because he knows Steve's just getting something out of his hair, like he does every goddamn time he sees a leaf or dust or fucking anything in Eddie's mass of curls. "Just being friendly. Now giddy up, you two've got a session to do."

"Not sticking around?" Gareth looks back at the garage, the forced nonchalance in his tone nothing compared to the shadow of King Steve's gaze. "Frank wanted to ask you about those threads from last week."

"Shit," Steve slapped his forehead, looking into the garage at Frankie who - fucking waves at them?! Mr. "Do what you want but I'm never falling for that Harrington charm bullshit" is waving at Steve. Who, incidentally, waves back with an apologetic smile. "Sorry, Frankie, I can't make it today, got a shift with the supply run! Rain check on the wardrobe?"

And Frank the Unwavering, notorious for sticking to his guns with a grip tight enough to choke a man, gives Steve a thumbs up before going back to strumming with Jeff. What the fuck.

"Wardrobe?" Eddie chokes.

"Don't worry about it," Steve waves a hand in the air and gently pulls Eddie off the car, settling his arm around Gareth, who takes Eddie's weight with ease. "I'll tell you later. You'll be good to take him, or should I?"

Gareth scoffs but his eyebrows aren't scrunched with any irritation or anger. "I think I can handle it, Harrington. Go handle your hero shit."

And here's the thing. Steve has a thing about that word. Eddie's noticed because, well, he's always watching Steve and he has a rocky relationship with the word "hero." Sometimes his whole body glows with the praise, smile so wide and eyes so sparkly it makes Eddie want to scream. Other times, Steve shrinks just a little, barely noticeable, and his smile dims and his eyes are shadowed with something Eddie doesn't understand. Or can't understand. He's not sure.

This time, Steve seems to be on the glowing side of things but it's so subtle compared to usual that Eddie just has to blink and all that golden haze is gone already. He blinks again and Steve's waving bye to him, blinks and Steve's in his car, blinks and he's driving back on the road to wherever people need him to be.

Gareth snorts, tugging Eddie out of his daze and shuffling them both toward the sofa at the back of the garage, the brown beauty it is. "Wipe the drool, man, you're getting it all over my hair."

"Oh like you're one to talk," Eddie waits until Gareth settles him on the sofa and fully stands up before fluttering his eyelashes up at him. "Gary."

"Shut up!" Gareth flushes, stomping over to his (barely holding together, but Eddie likes to think they're made of the same stuff Steve is, to keep going after a fucking averted apocalypse) drums. Jeff laughs when he fumbles with his sticks and Eddie grins when Gareth's attempt at throwing them lands the fuckers right at Frank and that sets them all off.

Yeah, maybe some stuff has turned on its head, Steve and the town and Eddie's general worldview, but he's still got his inner circle and that's good enough for him.

[barefoothighlander]

could you imagine casually calling one of the boys "Daddy" in front of the other guys out of impulse like "Thanks daddy" or "Bye daddy!" 🫣🫣

stop this is so funny like everyone just freezes and they're like "Did I hear that correctly" omg

Ghost: you'd be drinking at the pub with the team after a mission and it would just slip out.

"Oi love can you grab me that bottle"

"Yes Daddy"

And the team is silent, Simon's eyes just go wide as you lock eyes and your cheeks blush, you hope the team has drunk enough that they won't remember it but the next day Soap and Gaz are teasing you, answering every command you give them with "yes daddy". You literally have to run and hide from them cause they're relentless, Simon just glares in their direction every time they make a joke.

Price: You didn't catch your slip-up till you got into your car, one of the guys offered to play a game of poker with you and the team.

"Can't, gotta get home to Daddy"

And the men just stand there sharing glances, they'd never heard anyone refer to Price as anything other than Captain, they're all just looking around to make sure they heard you correctly. Once you got into your car the realization hit you, you texted Price, knowing that Soap would've called him the second you were out of earshot

Small problem, didn't mean to, sorry

Get home. Now.

As you sat in your car, praying that either you or Soap would just burst into flames.

Soap: He was a lot cockier about it, the two of you positioned together on an op, you swore you turned your comms off before talking

"You got eyes lass?"

"Affirm Daddy" you winked at him

"Let's keep the comms clear please" You hear Price's voice, followed by muffled laughter from Gaz and an audible sigh from Ghost. You're mortified, turning to Johnny who's got a devilish grin plastered on his face, this was definitely gonna get you some discipline from Price.

Gaz: You liked to tease him with the term, he got all flustered when you used it outside the bedroom. You stopped teasing him after one morning he had brought you tea in the conference room and you failed to notice the rest of the 141 behind him, too focused on your paperwork.

"Thank you Daddy" you beamed,

He stood there, shell-shocked, usually his response was at least a small huff of laughter but when you turned to see the team, mouths open in astonishment you hid your face with your hands, mouthing a silent I'm sorry to Gaz who didn't speak for the entirety of the meeting.

bonus

Konig: He's just baffled, even behind the dark mask you can see the red tint of his face, he practically ran out of the room when he heard the words slip from your lips.

"Hi Daddy"

The rest of the team teased him relentlessly, seeing how flustered they could make him, watching his eyes go wide at the word, he refused to hang out with the team for a month after it happened, you had to reassure him that they all found it funny and it was okay.

Alex: Ever the flirt, Alex barely flinched when he heard you say it.

"Bye Daddy"

"See you later Mama," he said winking at you.

The team was dumbfounded, they were accustomed to Alex's flirts but they'd never heard him anything like that, whispering to each other as Alex just turned back toward them like nothing happened. No one brought it up, it didn't happen again, Soap was convinced it never even happened given how nonchalant the two of you were about it.

[moon-alight]

Hi, i loved ur "nightmares" jo fanfic and wanted to request an ot9 reaction where they have a nightmare where they lose their s/o and can't find their s/o (and they like cry a lil cuz i feel like nicho cuz he's a softie and maki would a bit but let's leave it at that cuz it's a ot9 reaction) and srry for my vad english, anyway i love ur writing so yeh bye-bye 💗💗

Hello! :) I like this idea, I think it's absolutely adorable. . . also, what does everyone have with nightmares? Do you guys need someone to talk to or something? I'm glad you like my writing and your English is good enough for me to understand so, you're good. <3

Masterlist

&Team reaction to waking up from a nightmare and not finding you

Warnings: fluff, angst, sad &team

Word Count: 1359

-K

He wakes up in the middle of the night with a thin layer of sweat on his forehead. The recent events of his nightmare still fresh in his mind, he reaches out to find you but somehow can't.

He quickly opens his eyes and looks around. The spot on the bed where you would usually be is empty and right now he really would've loved your support. He looks around before remembering that you are currently at your house because you have to wake up early tomorrow.

He turns on the lights, sits up on his bed and stares at his phone on his nightstand. He has a discussion in his head, contemplating whether or not to call you but he decides against it. 'It was just a nightmare anyways' he would tell himself.

(He would tell you the next morning and you'd both talk about it which makes him feel better)

-Fuma

He has had livid dreams, sure, but never did he have such a livid nightmare and honestly, it scares him. He opens his eyes and looks around wildly only to find your side of the bed empty.

"y/n?" His voice is shaky but he tries to hide his fear as much as possible. He throws the blankets off of him and stumbles through the hallway. He hears faint voices come from the living room and decides to check it out only to find you watching tik-toks on the couch.

"Hey, baby." You say, smiling softly.

"What are you doing here?" Fuma asks, sitting down next to you. You close your phone and put it down next to you.

"I had a nightmare and didn't want to wake you."

"Me too." Fuma replies and wraps his arms around you. "We shouldn't have watched Nightmares on Elmstreet last night."

-Nicholas

His nightmares are usually about bad performances or something but this one was much, much worse. He lost you, the love of his life, after an argument which he could've fixed. When he wanted to apologize, he got the news that you had died in a car accident.

It all felt so real.

Especially because you two fought literally right before going to bed. He reaches out once he wakes up but you're gone. Instant panic spreads through his body. Did you walk away? Did something happen? Are you gonna break up with him?

You walk inside the room two minutes later to find your boyfriend crying on the bed. "Nico?" You ask, your voice is soft as to not scare him. He looks up, his eyes red and there are tear stains on his cheek. You had never seen him like this.

"I'm sorry." He whispers, you run to his side and sit down next to him. "We fought and you left and then you died! I couldn't say how much I love you, I couldn't say how much you mean to me--" *Hiccup* "You were just gone."

"I'm here, love." You assure him. "I'm not going anywhere, I promise." You pull him in your arms. "I love you, doesn't matter how much we fight I will always love you."

-EJ

He is stressed out. He has been ever since he got the role of leader which meant that he now has so many responsibilities meanwhile he also tries to take care of you. . . it's a lot. Nightmares aren't very uncommon but you not being there is.

He wraps a blanket around his shaking body and he is off to find the love of his life in the middle of the night in the dark dorm. Boy is determined to find you and ultimately does. He sees you stand at the kitchen counter with a cup of milk in your hands.

He walks over and embraces you from behind, letting his body weight fall on you. You jump slightly but laugh when you realize it's your own personalized teddy bear.

"Hey, baby. What's wrong?" You ask, taking another sip of your drink.

"Nightmare." EJ mumbles back. "You weren't there."

"Oh, I'm sorry, bubba. Want some milk to make up for my absence?"

-Yuma

He is absolutely terrified but will pretend he isn't just for the sake of being the protective boyfriend who doesn't need protection but the moment he realizes you're not there. . . he freaks the hell out!

"Princess?" He sits up and looks around with sleepy eyes. "Angel?" A scary sound comes from outside and he's up. "Sweetheart?" He asks again. Nothing. "Bab---AAAAAHHHH!!!!"

You slam your hand over his mouth to stop him from waking the other boys though you're sure they're awake by now. "What's wrong?" You ask but Yuma doesn't reply, no, he wraps his arms around you and holds onto you like you're his lifeline.

"I thought you were kidnapped!" You chuckle and rub your hand through his hair gently.

"Let's go back to bed, shall we?"

-Jo

My baby. ( ˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈♡) Anyways, he would wake up and stare at the ceiling unable to move. When he finally catches his breath he feels around the mattress with his hand only to find that you're not there.

He would want to go look for you but he's absolutely terrified to even as much leave his bed so he waits this one out. When you finally return to the room he does sit up and looks at you with teary eyes.

"What's wrong?" You ask, cradling his face in your hands. He sobs lightly and you gently wipe his tears away.

"Just a nightmare, it's stupid." You reassure him that it isn't stupid and climb in beside him. Jo holds onto you like a koala for the rest of the night, just making sure you won't leave again.

-Harua

Has a dilemma when he wakes up. Harua had positioned himself against the wall with his phone in his hands, your contact is visible but he isn't sure if he should call you. You were at home, asleep peacefully, he shouldn't wake you but he had clicked 'call' before he could stop himself.

"Yes?" Your groggy morning voice sounds. Harua feels so damn guilty about waking you up. "Harua?"

"M sorry." He reaches to end the call but your voice stops him.

"What happened?" You sound so worried, so caring.

"Nightmare."

"Want to talk about it?" You ask. He hears blankets shuffle and knows you're sitting up now too. So he decides to talk to you about it.

-Taki

He feels indifferent. He had a nightmare but he has had them many times before. . . then why is he currently grabbing onto his phone like an idiot? It rings four times before you pick up.

"Yes?"

"Where are you?" Taki asks, knowing you should've been besides him but you weren't.

"Bathroom."

"Oh, ok." He hangs up and stumbles out of bed. He walks towards the bathroom and knocks a couple of times.

"Yes?" You ask again, still tired from waking up only seconds ago. The door suddenly opens and Taki walks inside. You're glad you just pulled your pants up before he came in. "Hello, a bit of privacy?"

"I had a nightmare." Taki tells you, he looks rather shaken up. You quickly wrap your arms around him and comfort him the best you can.

-Maki

Pain. He feels pain. So much that he can't breathe properly and tears stream down his face. It looked and felt so real. He reaches for his phone and calls you immediately.

"Sorry for waking you." He apologizes when you have picked up. "But I had a nightmare and didn't know what else to do." You were up, you couldn't sleep so this sounded like the perfect opportunity to go to the dorms since you live close by.

"On my way." You arrive about seven minutes later and find him on the couch. His hair is messy and he is still wiping away his tears. "Oh, Maki." You say softly and sit down next to him.

He clings to you and buries his face in the crook of your neck. You chuckle lightly and rub up and down his back, comforting him.

[awriterinthenight]

'It's ok love' Part 1-Anthony Lockwood

requested: anonymous

words: 1850

warnings: mentions of family being a bit horrible, uhhhhhh I might have put Lockwood instead of Anthony once or twice cause I totally re read this after writing this (I did not), also sorry I haven't posted in awhile, school is kicking my ass and I just went through some shit, oh also language maybe? idk. Sorry this is in multiple parts, it was just easier to write this way. This is kinda just the set up so its not the most intriguing, but just wait till part two and three, I suggest you bring tissues

summary: You get invited to your sister's engagement party and Anthony has a case near there, so you offer him to stay there when his hotel has to cancel his reservation. So what could possibly happen when your not so nice family invites you and you spend a night getting picked on, but luckily Anthony is there to comfort you. Then he tells your family you and him are dating, so what could possibly go wrong?

"That's wonderful, I can't wait to see you guys there. Alright, bye bye." As I hang up the phone Anthony walks down the stairs carrying one of his bags for a case.

"Who was that," he asks, placing the bag down.

"It was just my mom," I tell him, "She was telling how my sister just got engaged and they're having a whole engagement party for her. It's quite exciting really," I say, trying to hide my nerves. My family was...something to say the least. They were rather wealthy, but not the best of people. Which is what led me to leave when I was 15 and start working at Lockwood and Co.

He looks at me a bit shocked, "Really, well are you gonna go," he asks, shocked since he knew me and my family weren't on the best of terms, but he never really knew the full truth.

I shrug, "Yeah, probably," I tell him, but quickly switch the subject, "So, are you prepared for your case," I ask, since it was a solo case. Lucy was busy with Norrie the day of the case, George promised Flo they'd go bird watching, and I wasn't in much of a good condition to go on a case.

In our last case while fighting off a type two, I managed to twist my ankle on a rug when I slid out of its way when it almost ghost touched me. Since then Lockwood had put me on house arrest basically, so I haven't been on a case in about a week. I tried to convince him to let me go on this one, but he insisted I wait a bit longer, at least until we knew I would be fine. I guess it didn't matter anymore since I was going to my sister's engagement party.

Anthony looked down at the bag he dropped, letting out a sigh, "I think so, I've got extra flares just in case and George wouldn't let me leave without having at least half of our stalk in my bag," he says, chuckling a bit at his own comment.

I can't help but laugh too, "I guess you'll be well prepared then," I say, our conversation turning stale as George calls us for dinner.

***

I was heading downstairs to the library when I heard someone on the phone.

"Uh huh, no I completely understand. Alright, goodnight," the person says, hanging up the phone with a sigh.

I descended the stairs, seeing it was Anthony who was on the phone, "Who was that?" I ask, suspicious of who would call this late.

He sighs again, running a hand down his face, "The manager of the hotel I was staying at for my case. He had to cancel my reservation since they're overbooked. He offered compensation, but now I have to find a new hotel somewhere else. But, anything this late in advance is gonna be expensive," he tells me.

I nod, "I'm sorry, that sounds horrible," I say, trying to sympathize. We stand there a moment before a thought appears to me, "Hey, your case isn't too far from my family's house right?" I ask, smiling a bit.

"I guess so, but what does that have to do with anything," he questions, confused.

I giggle at his confusion, "I think you need to get some sleep, your brain seems to not be thinking properly," I joke, moving a stray strand of hair out of his face, making his cheeks turn a slight pink tint, "What I mean is, if your case isn't far away from my families place, why don't you stay there instead of paying for a hotel," I suggest.

Anthony shakes his head saying, "No, I wouldn't want to intrude on you and your family. Plus, there probably wouldn't be space for me."

"My family wouldn't mind, I promise. And, there will be space for you, trust me. They might not even notice you're there," I reassure him, but he still shakes his head. I let out a say, "Anthony it'll be fine. I promise, let me offer you this one thing. You let me stay in your house, so let me just offer you a night or two at mine," I try to reason with him.

He lets out a calm sigh, "I could never truly say no to you, can I, especially when you say my name," he says, looking at me with nothing but adoration. No one else called him Anthony, only I did. He never really corrected me when I would slip up, unlike he would do with Lucy and George. If one of them said it he would immediately joke at how they were using his government name, but when I say it, to him it was like the sweetest love song. It got to the point where I only called him Lockwood if I was mad at him over something, and he hated it when I called him Lockwood, so I only call him Anthony from now on. So sometimes I would take advantage of it, like just now.

"I'll stay at your place, but just this one time, okay," he says, unable to take his eyes off of me.

I smirk at him, happy that I successfully got him to agree, "Good, we're leaving in the morning since its quite the train ride, so I'll see you in the morning, night Anthony," I say, turning around to walk back up the stairs, when I feel a hand catch my arm.

His hand is around my arm and he uses it to spin me around, "Wait, one last thing. Just cause I let you live here doesn't mean you owe me anything you know that," he assures me.

I smile at him softly, "Of course I know that, but how else was I supposed to get you to agree," I tell him.

He smirks, his hand sliding down to my waist, "You're very cheeky, you know that," he tells me, unable to hide his vibrant smile.

The laugh that leaves my lips is small, but just enough to make his face turn a bit pink from how close I am to him, "Oh, you wouldn't have me any other way," I retort, tilting my head and smirking at him.

He breathes out a sigh, "No, no I would not," he tells me. We stay like that for a moment. Too scared to move, since it feels like if we do the fragile feeling of happiness and admiration might break apart.

Anthony speaks first saying, "You should get to bed, I'll see you in the morning love," he says, adding the pet name at the end out of impulse.

I can't help but feel the blush take over my face. "You too, night Anthony," I say, walking back up the stairs, feeling the loss of warmth from his hands on my waist. He stands there watching me go up the stairs, drinking up every last bit of my presence like it's the only way he'll stay alive, before he heads back to his own room for the night.

***

My alarm clock went off at 6am, waking me up as I smelt fresh coffee being brewed. I had to catch my train at 8am with Lockwood, so I had about an hour to get ready, since the cab ride was only a few minutes from the station.

I brush my teeth and hair, doing my usual hairstyle and makeup. I threw on rather comfy clothes, a sweater since the trains were always cold, and my favorite jeans.

Heading downstairs I find George brewing fresh coffee, and cooking eggs for breakfast. "Morning George," I greet, taking a seat at the table.

"Morning," is all he says, grumbling a bit since he's not a morning person. He continues to cook as Lucy and Anthony make their way downstairs.

When George finishes breakfast we all dig in immediately. Lucy tells us about her plans with Norrie and George talks about where he and Flo are spending the day. I listen to them talk as I eat, too tired to speak this early in the morning. Anthony eventually chimes in explaining the change in plans, and how he's now staying at my place. Both of them just nod, a bit shocked since I don't talk much about my family.

After breakfast we all split ways, Lucy leaving to go meet up with Norrie, George going back to the library to collect the rest of the research for Anthony, while I finish packing. I make sure I have everything and that Anthony does too, since I don't want to have to turn around mid cab ride if either of us forgot something.

At around 7 me and Anthony grab our stuff to head out as the cab arrives just on time. I say bye to George, telling him not to burn the house down while we're gone. He just laughs sarcastically and pushes me out the door, out of annoyance.

Our cab ride was rather silent. The only conversation being the couple of times I had to reassure Lockwood that he was fine for staying at my family's place, and that he didn't need to pay the expensive price of a hotel. Our cab ride was only about 20 minutes or so, leaving us plenty of time to board our train.

When we got on we got a decent seat, and I convinced Anthony to let me have the window seat, which wasn't particularly difficult since I wasn't a big fan of train rides and he knew that. Train rides made me nauseous for some reason and it was rather annoying, but Anthony understood and made sure I was fine the entire ride.

"You okay?" he asked every few minutes to make sure I was fine.

I nodded my head, "I'm fine," I reassured him. It wasn't just the train ride making me feel a bit sick, but also the nerves from seeing my family. I only visited once for Christmas since I left, which wasn't the best trip, so since then I just lied saying everyone else didn't have anyone else to spend Christmas with and I felt bad. Or, that I was too busy with work to make time to visit.

Eventually Anthony caught on, asking, "Are you sure you're okay, is it the train or something else?"

I shrug, "The train obviously is making me sick, but I guess just the nerves from seeing my family too. I just haven't seen them in awhile, so I guess I'm just a bit nervous," I tell him.

"Well I'm sure they'll be happy to see you. I know I'm always happy when I see you, so you'll be just fine," he says, making me blush a bit. He then wraps his arm around me, helping me to relax a bit.

Slowly I fall asleep with his arm around me thinking, 'maybe this trip won't be so bad'.

If only I knew the truth, but at least I would have Anthony