#god someone get me a fuckin mentor

[gcballet]

Physically exhausted now just from four hours close-reading fr where did my stamina go

[sethvzekiel]

what could have been | 141 x cold!reader

a passing admission proceeds to completely take over his mind

141 x cold! reader. callsign azrael. gn! reader. mild angst + pining. multiple POV, no established relationship. flashback central, marked in red + italics.

part 1/same AU as this

Long hc/short fic. 3.6k words.

It was banter — really, just mindless chatter to fill the silence on the way back home. Something to wear off the adrenaline from the previous battle. It spilled from lips like loose threads, mindless ramblings about past experiences and feelings and army stories.

Stories like “LT, what do ye mean I wasn’t first place? That was a solid run I just did, solid!” and “When you were our age, Captain, they didn’t have telly,” between snickers and friendly insults.

You were the contractor, not one of them: a position you were keen on protecting as you kept to the far corner of the army plane, typing up your own report for Laswell. The chatter droned on in the back of your mind as you spared only the barest sliver of attention for emergencies. It was only when someone mentioned your name that you looked up from your laptop.

Gaz tilted his head at you, a spark of mischief in his eyes. He’d been getting bold lately, fully confident that he was your favorite comrade. Gaz did always have a sharp tongue, even for Price.

“Have you ever been in love?”

You scoffed, fully ready to get back to your report.

“What are we, schoolgirls at a sleepover? Don’t ask stupid questions.”

Someone closed your laptop. Soap.

“No, no, answer his question!”

“Scotsman. Get your hand off something that’s five times your salary, or I’ll remove it myself.”

You were only half kidding; the laptop was six times his salary. Merc money was a lovely thing.

Soap quickly retreated, muttering something about being on the wrong career path and “five times my fuckin’ salary, get off yer arse,” but nudged you nevertheless.

It felt as if the conversation was finally going to move on when another spoke.

“Answer the question, Azrael.”

This was a joke. You didn’t hide your disdain as you glared at Price.

“Really, Captain?”

Price took a long drag of his cigar.

“Answer it and I’ll tell Kate you’re on good behavior. She’ll be over the moon to hear you’re getting some social interaction.”

Unfortunately, he wasn’t lying. Laswell did not hide her hopes of getting you true comrades, not just contracted acquaintances, when she introduced you to the 141 — a hope you’d gone out of your way to quash for a long time. If a false reassurance from Price would get her mind off that ridiculous idea and focus on getting you more kill contracts…

Well, not a bad trade-off for pretending to be friends for one plane ride.

You let out a sigh from deep within your soul, opened your laptop again, and pulled up the report. Almost mindlessly, you spoke whatever came to your mind at that very moment, not knowing how badly it would change the 141.

“Sure.”

God, you could feel the whole plane lean in with anticipation.

“Never had the time to fall in love, but…” 

You mentally shrugged. This was fine to admit, right?

“... I was briefly interested in one of you. Now, if you’ll excuse me.”

You popped on your headphones, leaving the boys to dwell with that answer.

The plane couldn’t have gone any faster.

◈ GAZ

Interested? Like, interested-interested?

There was no getting you out of those headphones—he’d tried before, didn’t end well. The entire task force was stunned silent for a minute, each one picking apart your casual admission and grappling with the idea of Oh God, is it me?

It was Soap who broke first, exploding into a shocked yell that boomed throughout the tiny plane. That shook Gaz out of his stunned silence, but he still blinked rapidly as he tried to comprehend what you’d just said.

Interested. In one of them.

There was a one in four chance that it was him. Five, if Laswell counted, but he was certain that you saw her more as a mentor and confidant than a romantic prospect. Besides, she wasn’t even in the plane. It was between him, Soap, LT, and the Captain, and this was a battle royale he was keen on winning.

Gaz wasn’t blind. He was the first to notice the changing opinions of his teammates on you. Bearing the combined advantage of brains and emotional awareness, things the 141 usually lacked one or the other of, he picked up on Price’s constant attention towards you that increasingly felt less like a professional checkup. He knew about Ghost’s rivalry with you that brought a tinge of tenderness to his gruff exterior as he complimented your skill. And who could miss Soap locking onto you like a missile from day one?

But it had to be him, right? He was the only one you spoke to of your own accord, the one whose name you called when arranging for shared night shifts. The one who’s actually been to your room (he happily ignored the fact that he was just there to fetch a report for Laswell). The one who, at a drunken night out where you’d actually gotten tipsy for once, you’d stuck to like glue, no matter how rowdy the pub got.

Gaz was your first defender in the 141. When even Price was wary of your cold nature and mercenary background, Gaz was always up at arms, ready to express the simple truth that you were just a professional, and Price could look at Ghost for an example, couldn’t he? Always jumping the gun, fighting back even Soap’s teases at your expense simply because you weren’t present to defend your attitude and the unfairness of their assumptions felt real to Gaz. They didn’t see the you he saw. They just had to.

You were soft around him. Safe. And Gaz felt the same way, too. As much as you’d listen to his ramblings of whatever’s going on in his life, he looked forward to your own stories, hanging off of every rough-toned word as you shared your wisdom from past fights and your assessment of his skills, which he’d known was your way of caring for him. Making sure that he’d live long to fight good.

“In another world,” he’d said one night as you watched the last hours of your watch tick away. “Would you be back on the field again? If you had a choice to walk away from all this, live a normal life?”

Back then, your moonlit expression was intense, but sorrowful as you considered your answer. Gaz thought that you were only being sincere in answering him when you’d gazed deep into his eyes, but now, he couldn’t help but wonder if you meant something else when you replied:

“I don’t know. Where would you be?”

“Dunno either. Always wanted to protect people. Make some real change. Don’t think I’d handle being an artist or bloody stockbroker all my life.”

He was so fucking stupid. Why didn’t he actually listen to what you’d said when he was too busy imagining living some alternate life, when you were right in front of him and so close?

You smelled nice.

“Then I’ll follow you back to the fight, Kyle.”

“Aw mate, I’ll look forward to it, yeah?”

The memory, the regrets, and the what-could’ve-been’s swirled in Gaz’s mind and stung at his eyes.

He wanted to look at you again, but he wasn’t going to risk anyone seeing his face right now with how he’s feeling.

He was a bloody moron, and he lost his chance.

◈ SOAP

“Yer taking the piss!”

Laughter was always Johnny’s first response. Little Johnny-boy giggling nervously as his mother demanded to know where he’d been after playing outside until dark. Freshly-recruited MacTavish snickering as he far surpassed the other recruits in exercises, again, to their dismay. Sergeant Johnny ‘Soap’ MacTavish cackling with delight and adrenaline as he fired off the C4, lighting up the battlefield with plumes of orange fire.

Laughter was also a defense mechanism: difficult personalities, hard questions, bad days. Heal it or shrug it off, Soap was never one to make things more complicated than they should be.

This laughter… he wasn’t sure if it was one of joy or nerves.

You were interested. Were, he tried to remind himself, but his mind kept on latching onto the ‘interested’ part. One of them—which could’ve been him. 

He was delusional now, flailing around and being the jokester when it was all just an act to hide his inner turmoil. Fuck, did you know that he had it bad for you? It was his fault for not bothering to hide it and trailing after you, but he thought that you already shrugged it off as a joke. Did… did you take him seriously, after all?

Or worse, what if it wasn’t him? 

His glance went to Gaz, remembering how he’d fallen asleep on the truck that one time and accidentally leaned on your shoulder, how you stiffened, then slowly settled down, even adjusting your shoulder for the entire two-hour drive. How, no matter the situation or your mood, you always called upon Gaz with a decidedly softer tone than the one you used on him.

Surely, he wasn’t that attached to you. You were comrades, a passing fancy wouldn’t hurt anything.

He’d never seen LT smile, ever. Part of it’s the mask, but it was clear in his voice and the lack of crinkling around his eyes that smiling wasn’t his thing. But then Ghost and you had that sniper competition, dragged Soap in to referee, and when you hit dead-center for all moving targets, Soap wrenched his gaze away to catch a shine of something in Ghost’s eyes as he watched you.

Friends and professionals. That was all you were, right?

“Good health makes good men, MacTavish,” you said sharply as he sat up on his bed. Soap was forced into the medbay after a particularly grueling op. Long, sleepless nights, absolute hellfire, and blood loss all culminated in him passing out from shock mid-battle. His memories of the exact moment he collapsed were hazy, but he knew that he heard someone call his name in a choked scream.

Was it Gaz who screamed then? He was always the worrywart. Soap scratched his head, wincing as pain flared up his side at the simple motion. He shot you a shining, albeit weak, grin.

“Don’t lose yer head over me, was just the one time.”

Your glare narrowed.

“One time is all it takes, soldier.” 

Fuck, you were calling him ‘soldier’ now? You were pissed. Soap raised his hands in surrender.

“I give, I give. I’ll take my meds a day and all that shite. No trouble from me.”

For a moment, he was expecting more scolding, admonishments of his recklessness or a possible lack of skill. A “stop dragging the rest of us down with you,” considering your pride in your own battle prowess. But he got no such thing.

You sighed, looking a thousand nights older as you did, and he caught the marks of sleepless nights under your eyes. The roughness of your hands as you held his good shoulder. The miniscule caress of your thumb that he assumed (back then) was purely accidental.

“Make good on that, Johnny,” you whispered, gaze drifting off elsewhere. “You have to.”

Your voice was hoarse—why? When you left and the medic had taken your place, refreshing Soap’s bandages, he asked about how long he was out.

“Three days, sergeant,” the medic replied. “And your scary friend insisted on staying here for all of it. Tended to you like one of our own staff.”

“Psh, LT? Knew he was soft.”

“No, no, not the lieutenant. Your PMC friend.”

Without even thinking about it, Johnny laughed.

◈ GHOST

He definitely wasn’t paying attention to the mindless gossip, and anyone who’d say otherwise will have months of latrine duty awaiting them. Gaz calling your name piqued his attention, but only barely, and brought a tickle of amusement when he asked you such a ridiculous question.

He was much less amused at your answer.

It was sarcastic, he tried to reason. Spouting off bullshit to keep the boys off your trail and get back to work as soon as possible. That’s what you’re always like, and that’s what he liked about you.

He also liked your shots. The pride you took in your expertise. The devotion to your warcraft. How you always took his challenges as if your name was on the line. How you’d smirk if you won, or promise comeuppance if you lost.

He liked your loyalty to Laswell — and envied it. You obeyed him and Price, yes, but he would never forget the brief gleam of admiration when the boys asked you about Laswell over lunch. He liked and envied your closeness with Gaz: a sign that you might be a true ally of the 141 after all, but a closeness that he wondered if you could extend to anyone else. He respected your ferocious protectiveness of Soap when he’d (stupidly) collapsed mid-battle, but watching you tend to Soap for nights on end wrenched something awful from within his chest.

You were a shade more casual with Price. According to the captain, you had some snark to you when not in work mode: a privilege Price had gotten purely because you were both friends of Laswell. You bonded with Price like you were fellow leaders, people down similar paths instead of mere colleagues, and when planning missions, you and Price made up a tactical machine to be reckoned with.

It was whenever he’d deliver late night reports to Price’s office, that he’d listen before knocking on the door. Muffled conversation—most of it Price’s, but every so often, there was a quick chuckle that wasn’t his, or a quiet snark followed by Price’s gravelly laughter. The office would be thick with cigar smoke when Ghost was allowed in, but what was harder to swallow was the cigar hanging from your lips that you’d returned to Price, and he’d popped it between his teeth without question.

Ghost was in deep. He’d never admit it to anyone, not even to himself, but he was. That chilling, anxiety-inducing truth nudged at the back of his head as he silently watched Soap cackle and holler throughout the plane while you intentionally ignored them, eyes trained on your report like your life depended on it.

You and the laptop. A familiar sight when he’d pass by the rec room on late nights, where you’d be tapping away at the laptop with stacks of coffee cups and energy bars littered across the table.

“Bloody hell, that can’t wait until tomorrow?” He’d asked, exasperated, by the fifth night.

You took a moment more to work before responding.

“The mob won’t wait for tomorrow. This mission needs to go down tonight.”

“Don’t let me stop you.”

He didn’t know why he stayed there with you, sharing the couch as he made tea for two and set a cup beside you without a word. He could have actually tucked in for the night, gotten some well-deserved sleep lest he be grouchier than ever for the next day’s training drills. Or popped open a book if he felt like it. Anything more productive than sit beside you all night as you silently blazed through reports and phone calls, arranging operations that he had no business in caring about.

You were exhausted, but you were determined and alert as you ferried reports on the trafficking ring takedown. The calm, effortless strength in your voice as you spoke—sometimes strongly—with operatives much higher up the chain than you, because you knew what you were doing and were going to see this op to the end. A flicker of silent gratitude as Ghost refilled your tea again and tidied up your makeshift workspace.

A call by the first sliver of sunrise made you sag into the couch with relief.

“Mission accomplished?” Ghost asked.

You slid your tired gaze to him, and this close to you, he caught your tiny, sleepy grin.

“G’job, LT,” you murmured, voice thick with lethargy. “Mmh… needta phone Kate…”

“I’ll do it.”

“Not your op.”

“Don’t think Laswell’d understand a word of what you’re saying right now. C’mon, let’s get you some rest.”

He beckoned for you to stand up, only to hear a soft, muffled snore. You… were sleeping, knocked-out dead, with a hint of your grin remaining, probably dreaming about a job well done. Disheveled, snoring, and surrounded in loose notes and coffee stains, you were far from the cold professional that you normally made yourself to be.

The rec room was no place for sleeping. Soap would be here any minute, booming and hollering as him and Gaz would raid the fridge, again. You needed to be anywhere else.

And if Ghost was going to carry you in his arms all the way back to your room and go through the trouble of arranging for your sudden day-off, then he was going to do it silently, and pretend it never happened when you approached him the next day.

◈ PRICE

That… was a surprise.

While Price was the most privy to your story as your commanding officer and, more importantly, Laswell’s friend, much of your life was still a mystery to him. Laswell only gave him a few pointers: “They’ve had a long life, John,” and “Trust is a double-edged sword for them.”

He could guess when you entered Laswell’s life. It was some years ago, when she was busier than ever, to the point that he’d considered staging an intervention alongside her wife when Laswell refused with fire in her eyes. She was fighting for something, he could tell, but he didn’t know what exactly until she told him about you.

Somewhere in the gaps between what little he knew about you, Price hoped you had some normalcy to your life. Enough memories on hand to look back fondly upon, to carry you through the darker days. Yet he had a feeling that you had little of such memories to yourself. Perhaps, that was why he decided to share with you some of his own.

Foolishness in his youth. Summers from his wilder days. Dreams he’d had and lost, but never mourned—the kinds of men he’d wanted to become before making peace with himself. You understood, somehow: you were an old soul, no matter your age, a wealth of experiences and wisdom in you with just as many unanswered questions.

You can be safe with me, his soul all but screamed in your nightly chats. The doubt and fear and sorrow layered on your shoulders like dust was easy for him to see when he could feel the same thing. You weren’t delicate, not by a long shot. You were one of the strongest people he knew, but there was nothing Price could do to stifle the yearning in his chest to hold you, let you rest in his shadow and believe for once that everything was going to be alright.

“Do you have any interest in living long, sir?” You muttered as Price brought out his first cigar of the night. He wouldn’t be smoking this early in the night, but he had to deal with higher-ups and red tape all day just for some damn clearance. You were the only person he’d actually looked forward to speaking with that day.

“Smoking won’t kill me, Azrael—” You scoffed, then. “—it’s the bloody Pentagon that will.”

“And the UN. And the UK.”

“If the boys don’t get to me first. Where’s my lighter?”

“Here you go.” You didn’t have his lighter, but you had your own up and ready.

“Picked up the habit, did you?”

“No. You’ve lost your lighter enough times that I bought one myself.”

He offered you a gruff thanks and sank into his chair, watching the smoke swirl up to the amber light. You leaned back on his desk, your body barely brushing his—something that he was used to by then that he was second-guessing now.

It was beautiful and terrible, how close his hand was to yours.

Stupid stories made you laugh, but not foolish ones. Your concern for the boys was evident even in simple retellings of the past; a fact that burned in his heart when he noticed. So he told you about how Gaz tried to fix a leaky shower only to explode the entire camp’s plumbing system, he clung to your brief chuckle like a lifeline. The mirth lighting up your face was going to be his second addiction.

“Want to try, soldier?” He asked as he held out his cigar, not for the first time.

“Just this once. If it’s ass, you’re not getting another light out of me.”

He was going to offer you a new one, but you’d taken the one he’d been smoking and casually placed it between your lips, as if the very sight hadn’t made the blood roar in Price’s ears. You frowned at the taste—he laughed, ignored the flush of heat across his body.

A knock on the door: Simon, turning in his papers. He froze when he saw you and Price, and though obscured by his mask, Price knew the lieutenant well enough to recognize the hesitation in his steps.

Why did he do it?—Price wondered now as he recalled that night, how you’d returned the cigar and he, without thinking, popped it right back to his mouth in front of Simon. And why did he feel proud?

But Price had to hold himself in check. As captain, he had boundaries that he mustn’t cross. The team’s well-being was his top priority, that was always the truth of it, and as he watched the boys dwell in the fallout of your shocking admission, he had no place in making this rivalry worse, no matter how he felt about you.

[angel-of-the-moons]

Ballet dancer reader x khonshu who tries to be his mysterious scary self and the reader just WHIPS her leg up to uppercut his head and crack his skull. Khonshu grabs her leg at the last second and he’s VERY surprised as she looks him DEAD in the eye, “I will FUCK you up. My ballet teacher has been a Russian matriarch since I was 5. You can’t scare me, bitch”. And khonshu’s just “Well mark me down as nervous AND horny!!”

I fucking cackled at this it's so fucking gorgeous

I changed it up a bit for comedic effect but asfghhkkll

Old Birds and New Tricks

Khonshu x Fem!Dancer!Reader

TW/CW: Attempted mugging, reader is a badass, Khonshu pops a boner for the first time in like ever, but nothing explicit happens :)

A/N: I figured you'd get a kick outta this one @drinkingwithkhonshu @juneknight because I'm on the floor with it lmao

🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑

You were walking home after a long practice session, your toes and legs ached from straining to stay on your tippy toes for so long, your arms cried for relief from the strain of holding the bar, performing so many sweeps and graceful flares alongside your troupe and mentor.

Your mentor, Katja Ivanov was a good teacher and a harsh mentor. She was a hulk of a woman, roped with muscles built over her long period of performing dance (you yourself thought she must have been in prison at some point, too but when you shot the question as a joke she merely laughed; but didn't deny it).

Katja was a woman who took no shit from rude people, and she instilled that in all of you, her dancers, her "baby birds" she called you. She made sure that all of you knew that just because you were dancers, people couldn't take you for granted.

So, after "official" dance practice had ended... Katja taught all of you how to use your strength and flexibility to defend yourselves as well as perform graceful maneuvers.

And it came in handy. Really, really handy.

London was dangerous after dark, the empty streets crawling with bad things in the shadows, like an infection beneath the skin.

That was how you found yourself in an alley, a large drunk man between you and freedom.

You were no quitter, no coward, and instantly, like a computer scanning a file, your brain recollected each one of Katja's lessons and put them into action.

Your body flushed with fresh adrenaline, your heart hammering within the confines of your chest as you whipped around on one foot, your other flying out to kick your assailant in his gut, knocking him back and making him dry heave with the strain.

"I told you, asshole." You hissed, bringing your fists up to guard your face.

"All I got in my bag is my gear. Now piss off before I break your jaw."

"Fuckin'... bitch." The man wheezed as he stumbled out of the alleyway, leaving you behind and feeling the high of victory.

You pick up your bag where you dropped it and slipped the strap back over your chest, the band squishing a bit between your breasts as you tightened it.

"Amusing." A deep, raspy voice mused.

You whipped around, trying in vain to locate the source of the voice. It came from nowhere, but at the same time... it came from everywhere.

"I was merely passing through when I thought to aid you, human." It spoke again, your very bones trembling as the voice bored into your very brain.

"But you seem to have been able to handle that threat on your own."

You pressed your ears hard beneath your hands, gritting your teeth at the invasive feeling the voice left as it crawled in and out of you.

"God! Just--get out of my head!" You say through your gnashed teeth.

You hear an exasperated sigh, and you feel the air shift around you as you lift your gaze, your eyes trailing the body of someone who just appeared in front of you.

He looked like a cliché monster from one of The Mummy movies, draped in linen and flowy robes and everything. The freakin' bird skull completed the freaky visage.

"The hell--" You sputter, dropping your hands from around your ears, taking a step back from the... the thing in front of you.

"Seeing you handle an opponent so large was amusing." He--and you were most certain that he was a he--chuckled grimly. "A tiny little waif like you."

Okay, you didn't care how big and imposing this otherworldly bastard was, the fact he was jabbing at your stature and visual "weaknesses" irked you. You could swear you heard Katja's voice from over your shoulder.

"Kick his ass, да, маленький?" She would jeer.

"You... think I'm... small?" You say slowly, your eyes narrowing to a dangerous glint as he leans in, the smell of the spices clinging to his body wafting into your nose, heat radiating from his lithe body as he bent to your level.

You were giving him a chance to walk it back, maybe apologize for being a judgmental prick, so you wouldn't have to prove once again that you were just the opposite.

He did not.

"You are not as weak as you appear... Little one." He huffed, his head moving in a slight jerking motion, indicating his amusement.

Yeah, no. You had enough of big assholes thinking you were easy pickin's tonight.

You smiled sweetly up at him, your expression completely devoid of any innocence behind the mask of charm. You could see his shoulders drop and head tilt in confusion, but he was given not another moment longer to ponder why you would be smiling.

He expected you to retort, to snap, to--his thoughts were immediately cut off, as you moved in a blur.

Because you effortlessly raised your leg with lightning speed brought on by years of practice, and curled your foot in the classic ballerina's stance and kicked him in his stupid ass beak.

When your shoe made contact, you swore you heard the dry bones crunch as he stumbled back, almost falling flat on his ass before he caught himself with his staff, a grunt coming away from him.

Your hands gripped your bag strap as you looked down at him indignantly, a sense of smug superiority washing over you.

"Not as weak as you thought, now, huh?" You huffed victoriously, before turning on your heels and storming out of the alley.

Khonshu, the god of the Moon, dispenser of Justice and protector of those in the night...

...was just kicked in the face by a tiny woman.

And she actually did manage to crack his bones. They healed almost instantly, of course, thanks to his divinity.

But what didn't heal was his pride as he kneeled in the dirty alley, leaning on his staff for support as he watched you leave.

The look in your eyes, the power behind your legs... It was like the sun came up early and rose with your kick, to wash out the cool light of his moon with the harsh burning rays of daylight.

And it left him stunned. Stunned in a way no mortal has ever been able to.

And, frankly, he found his body responding in... other ways, too. Ways he hadn't indulged in what felt like... eons.

He was a god, yes, but divinity doesn't automatically grant piousness; and he found himself imagining you using your legs in a different way.

Had Khonshu a human mouth, he would be smiling.

He needed to see you again.

🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑

да (pronounced da) = Yes

маленький (pronounced malen'kiy) = Little One

(Forgive me if it's butchered, I used Google translate for it asdfghjkl)

[gaymurdersalad]

Hey, David, what do you think is your relationship with the Sport? Friends? Employee? Somethin’ else?

>Em- Employe?? Gah, no! Funny, funny one Asker… Sportsy? Where are…-

>Well… Well it’s a morning for complicated questions, id’n’t it? Heh heh…!

>He’s a lotta things to me, Asker. Groupin’ all our experiences and emotions ‘nd feelings ‘n eveythin’ under one title would be… I-It would be crazy— Disrespectful, even!

>He… Sportsy started out as a strong friend, though, I’d think. Y— Heh, Y’see, back in Colorado, he took up quite nice wit’ me. You shoulda seen the glimmer in those cute little blue eyes when I pitched the whole murderin’ thing to him! He ran his lil’ hands through his buzz cut, all bashful, and he looked me square in the eyes when he said he wanted to take down that stupid fuckin’ Bear Cult wit’ me— whatever it takes, he said! That beautiful bastard, him…

>… For a while we were close like that. Maybe less business-y and more… Y’know, like I said! Friend-like. Shared a lot of good moments in Vegas. If I recall right— which, Jesus, it’s gettin’ harder by the day— that was the first time I ever really felt… Close wit’ someone like that, Y’know, Asker? He wasn’t a mentor to me, or some sorta… Heh, Father figure like Henry, but he was… He was close to me. He had me at a level that no one else had ever had me.

>… That sounds— Hah! That sounds real gay! Pfft. Heheheheh. Asker, I promise we ain’t gay. I— Heheh, got me fuckin’ laughing and shit! No. No, that ain’t us, we ain’t some couple livin’ together behind a white picket fence, thank god. That always sounded like a nightmare to me.

>Though. I mean, if Sportsy wus… If… If he wanted t’…

>G— Guh, uhhh, busiensss parters now, we’re business partners. For now. That might be the best label to describe it Asker, yeah. Still friends, but we so more business than friend stuff now, Y’know how’s it goes with the- the uhm, passage of time and whatnot… heheh.

>…

>S- Say, do you know where the fucker is? I can’t find him nowhere, I-I’m startin’ to get… Nervous. I- He ain’t in his workshop, in the bedroom— the sheets are cold— no where in the livin’ room, I— Oh, god, uhm… A-Asker, where is he? Asker?

[yakool-foolio]

"Exactly as I instructed" RRRRRRRRRRR STAY THE FUCK BACK STRONGHART I DON'T LIKE YOUR TONE! Hi Kazuma :D Bye Kazuma ;-;

I doubt Kazuma is prosecuting Van Zieks to avenge his father. I still think that someone (main suspect being Stronghart) is pushing him into believing that Van Zieks really is the Reaper, which would make his mentor no better than his serial killer father. Regardless, Kazuma's not gonna submit himself to Stronghart's rules! He will not be boxed and stuck in your single file line!

I don't believe Gregson's the Reaper for a diddly darn SECOND. Waiter, one assassin with an identity crisis, please!

SHINN?!

Not the assassin I was expecting at all. So why the hell was she part of the morse code message?! She killed Wilson! The person/people behind that message really didn't think this through. It's like that one brain game where ya have to get a bag of grain, a chicken, and a fox across a river without the animals eating anything, but in this case it's four randos trying not to kill each other and failing miserably.

Genshin protected Van Zieks? I'm now suffering from mixed feelings, cause if Genshin was wrongfully accused as the Professor, I'm going to have to reevaluate everything I've thought of him and Kazuma's motives uh oh.

Wilson wasn't Sholmes' partner, huh. And now Jigoku's gone missing. Everything keeps going further and further downhill these days. "So where does that leave me?" OWOWOWOW MY HEART NOOOOO RYUNOSUKE YA CAN STRIVE TO HELP KAZUMA STILL HE NEEDS SOMEONE TO HELP HIM SORT THINGS OUT

SHOLMES JUMPSCARE

Aw Kazuma n Ryunosuke both apologized to Daley, it's good that they both recognized that they pushed him too hard. If the coroner was there during Genshin's 'execution' then could it be that Sithe is the one who let him escape? Genshin said he ended another man's life, but he said nothing about killing the noblemen. Oh man I'm really gonna regret painting him as an irredeemable killer aren't I? That note must hold the truth of what really happened with the Professor killings, and someone must've stolen it. Kazuma never got to read his father's last words.

Ryunosuke when he's told not to leak a government secret:

Kazuma spotted! OH JESUS I GOT JUMPSCARED BY BATS I DIDN'T KNOW THEY'D DO THAT Aww Ryunosuke thought a sparrow would be nice for Kazuma as an animal companion, that's so cuuuute ;w;

NAHHHHHHHH SAD BACKSTORY IS GONNA MAKE ME EMOTIONAL ACK! And Kazuma was lied to about Genshin's true cause of death, only for it to be revealed that hey your dad's actually a mass murderer, ouch. AND HIS MOM DIED TOO NOOOOOO! I WAS RIGHT HE DOES THINK VAN ZIEKS IS THE REAPER! He believes his father is innocent and that Van Zieks doomed him to die. That's why Kazuma's prosecuting against him. The real reason Kazuma cut down the wax model was because he believed it's a horrid defamation of a justful protector.

GOD DAMN THAT SHIFT IN TONE WAS FUCKIN PERFECT AUGH Ryunosuke and Kazuma were able to reminisce fondly together, but as soon as Van Zieks wedged its way into the conversation, they realized that they're on completely different wavelengths and they don't understand each other like they used to. That shift being so expressively presented through the sudden change between Nocturne and A Prosecutor Reborn is UNBEATABLE it's gotta be one of my favorite scenes in this series now.

(To Whom It May Concern - @raymondshields)

[junglefurytrash]

WE HAVE BEEN FED! I'VE BEEN WAITING SO EAGERLY FOR THIS TO GET UPLOADED BY SOMEONE!!

So I got around to watching the PRJF Panel that got uploaded very recently, and as one of the resident regulars of JF's community I wanted to make a post sharing my favourite bits and thoughts/ramblings. Because I love this show, I love these doofuses, and this panel makes me laugh so damn much.

This panel once again reminds us all that Bede is so damn tall (so is Oliver [Swoop's actor] honestly), meanwhile Holly and Aljin are so teeny by comparison.

"And it was so fantastic, it was such a wonderfully set up.." >Anna proceeds to have a brain bluescreen and Bede comes to her rescue

"The best part of it [Power Rangers] now is coming to these and seeing all of you guys, meeting all of you guys, and hearing what it means to you", David oh my god you absolute sweetheart. 😭

Anna, instantly after: "Can you see why he's our mentor?"

"Personally, I have a lot of fond memories of sitting in a dark set, with this one over here" as she gestures to Bede and he gives an innocent little wave, oh my god these two give me so much happiness and life.

Additional happiness and life with Holly and Bede, I find it so funny that her strongest memories are of all the damn takes it took for him to do the Dramatic Cloak Flip ™️ in a way where it didn't land on anybody, her included (it absolutely had to have landed on her at least once during recording for her to say that which makes me cackle laughing), and the amount of fur that got flung everywhere on them from the cloak.

Even MORE from these two, Bede telling his goofy ass story while Holly is one chair away from him literally CRYING with laughter for the majority of it.

"You have the pizza you wanna have, babe." The way I thought of Fran saying that to Camille post-season o h my god do not tempt me, Sarah-

Anna: "Once a Ranger.." The Entire Room: "Always a Ranger!" Ya'll have me in tears again,,

I find it really sweet that even after so many years since Jungle Fury happened, those who worked with the stuntees and martial art professional trainers still remember the names of the people who taught them and did the stunt work and show a lot of appreciation towards them.

RJ's mannerisms being inspired by Johnny Depp and Keanu Reeves makes so much sense, oh my god.

LITERALLY EVERYBODY MIMICKING RJ'S MANNERISMS IMMEDIATELY AFTERWARDS IS THE F UNNIEST THING.

I love the answers to the first audience-asked question of "What would YOUR animal spirits be?" David - Wolf or Husky (totally not influenced by the character he played, as he insists) Aljin - Lion (because he's a Leo, fair enough) Holly - Hummingbird (because she's chatty. ALSO I LOVE THAT, YES, please can someone give us a Hummingbird outfit for Camille) Anna - Cheetah (because she likes running even though she apparently sucks at it, honestly mood) Bede - Dragon (because he was born on the Year of the Dragon, if that's not a fuckin s ign idk what is) Nikolai - Lynx or Bobcat (because he's in the same boat as Anna, likes running and agility), but also perhaps a Chicken because of his birth year LMAO Paul (Finn's actor) - Lion also (also a Leo, and also likes lounging in the sun, honestly mood pt.2) Sarah - Goose (because it looks elegant initially but just shrieks a lot and she relates, honestly mood pt.3) Oliver - Ostrich (for no reason, bro just says that's what he thinks works)

"Would you go back and do it [the show] all again?" The entire cast: "YES!" 😭 ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Anna's eagerness about being part of the Power Rangers franchise and how much she loved/loves her character Lily is so pure and sweet, she's amazing.

"What do we think everybody, 16 year anniversary special?" YES, PLEASE, I WANT AN OUNCE OF HOPE FOR THE FUTURE OF THE FRANCHISE!

THE FANDOM'S QUESTIONS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED! FRAN WOULD BE THE ORANGE OWL RANGER! I eagerly await to see any possible fanart from this.

"I got to do lots of backlanded slap moves which I really loved, and she [Camille] was a bit backhanded." Camille is the Master of Sarcastic Compliments confirmed.

I also love the cast (David especially) speaking so nicely of the writers even during the strike and complimenting them for how well they did the arcs for the characters, villains especially.

"What would be your choice of Ranger team to team up with if you had the choice to do so?" Holly, immediately: "Mystic Force!" <- Was in Mystic Force Sarah, also immediately: "Space Patrol Delta!" <- Was in SPD

The hypothetical villain team-up of Dai Shi, Lothor, and Mesogog would be hilarious, purely because Dai Shi and Mesogog have roughly the same ideals (erasing humanity so their own people can rule and live on the planet), and then there's Lothor who is c ompletely just off on his own adventure fighting ninjas.

Also Anna shrieking at the idea of the Rangers fighting Double Dai Shi is SO funny.

"This is my first ever one [convention], and I've just really loved meeting all of you, it's been incredible." SARAAAHHH 😭

"Would you guys be interested, those that are Rangers and whoever wants to, to end it with the morph pose?" Anna, in the most elated voice I've ever heard from a person: "I THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER ASK!" I will repeat again, thIS WOMAN IS SO AMAZING IN HOW MUCH SHE LOVES THIS FRANCHISE!

Bede and Holly trying their best in the group morph, because they have one but Jarrod's is literally just standing menacingly and Camille's is mostly a super fancy spirit-summoning arm and hand movement. Have I said how much I adore these two yet??

Nikolai, literally in the middle of the group selfie: "WAIT, WHICH CAMERA ARE WE LOOKING AT???" Holly: "I DON'T KNOW!"

This panel is just the most amazing thing, seeing almost all the cast of Jungle Fury together answering questions, laughing and being silly with each other during it, genuinely makes me so happy given JF is my favourite season (and honestly my comfort show).

❤️💛💙💜🤍🖤💚

[kharonion]

if you're still doing these 🥃 with your bois!!

core meme-ories | oc list [note: these are for the Cyberpunk 2077 blorbos]

��- Rogue Amendiares

• VIKT — Rogue was one of the first people Vikt took gigs from immediately after being tossed into the city gutters, and really, both of them thought they'd detest one another—a regular occurrence considering his past employment. Seeing potential in him, though, she helps him get his footing, learn the tools of the trade, and eventually (and unintentionally) takes a role that's more parental than mentor, and the two develop a strong bond like mother-son.

"Hey, má, you okay?" "Why you gotta call me that?" "Why not? You're family. Only one I have. Figure it's appropriate." "God, it's weird to feel it again... like I have a son." "Hopefully that isn't a bad feeling." "No... No, it's not, kid. Now, quit distracting me, I've got work to do." "As do I. But I think this is a better use of our time."

They're always there for each other, especially after Mikoshi. Giving advice, checking in, Vikt doing the very rare job for her if absolutely needed (despite his insistence that he's retired). For both, they are the only family they have.

• SÖREN — For Sören, Rogue is merely a legendary name tossed around the streets growing up. The infamous Queen of the Afterlife was someone he and many of the other kids dreamed of meeting—and better yet, of working for.

So, when River drags him there on a lead and Sören catches her out of the corner of his eye, it's almost surreal. And, of course, he has to go over and make a fool of himself.

"Holy hell, are you... are you really her?" "Depends on who you think that is. And why you're asking." "Fuck, you so are! Afterlife's Queen Bitch! In the flesh." "Why don't you go sit and have a drink on me? Before you blow a circuit." "I... I get a drink... from Rogue... holy fuck holy fuck holy—" "Okay, punk, you can fuck off now." "Oh, uh, yes, ma'am! Promptly fuckin' off!"

[dracothedeatheatingcupcake-ao3]

Director's Commentary! ☆☆☆: Chapter 14 from "The Problem With Mondo" although I can be specific if you wish it

"Oh, shit, if it ain’t lil’ Mondo Fuckin’ Owada, goddamn. How the fuck is it goin’, kid? S’only been, what... a year, two, since ya last called?"

"Oh, yeah? Yer just ‘in Tokyo’ now? Like I don’t fuckin’ know that yer attendin’ that pretentious as fuck institute. Ya don’t call me since yer brother died, an’ all I fuckin’ get is ‘I’ve been busy,’ ‘fore ya go on with yer request. Well, if ya want me ta do whatever the fuck ya need done, yer gonna hafta give more detail than that, squirt. How the fuck did that even happen? Didn’t think Hope’s fuckin’ Peak would be the kind ta take in a biker. Ain’t like ya don’t deserve it, but damn, kid. Goin’ places, ain’t ya?"

"So, fucking... leave me the hell alone. I’m gonna fucking leave now and I- I don’t ever wanna see yer goddamn face again. Forget my number and never contact me again. You understand me?"

"I... shit. Fuckin’... shit. Still so fuckin’ stubborn, ain’t ya...? God... god fuckin’ dammit. Fine. Fine. Ya wanna live the rest a’ yer life with yer head in the goddamn sand, be my fuckin’ guest. Cut me out, don’t talk ta me ever again. Do whatever the fuck ya like. "

I care deeply for Daisuke and Mondo's relationship

Oooh, thank you!! Honestly I had forgotten I had reblogged this, so when I saw this ask when I was at my internship this morning I was like "..... HUH????"

😅😅😅

But! I do have a lot of commentary for that chapter, so this is a great one to do! And I'm glad you like their relationship!! I love it too, so I'm happy that other people do as well.

First, I'll do a general commentary, then do the specific ones you asked about. I'll do a read more here to prevent this from ruining someone's dash, ha.

What this ask is referring to:

Fanfic Writers: Director’s Cut

So, chapter 14. Originally, it had been a lot different when I came up with it than what I ended up writing. I actually remember that I had been at work when I came up with the idea for the chapter. I had been walking with the kids (I'm an elementary after school teacher) during their walking/running club during our weird COVID return year, and I had been thinking of what I wanted to write later when I got home. Originally, I had wanted Mondo to call in a favor from an old friend to get the helmet and wine all in one. The friend was going to be about his age, maybe Daiya's age, and I think I was going to have them be more like a lackey or something. Someone who wasn't super important to Mondo. They still were going to be all "dude that sounds like a date, wow." Mondo wasn't going to get angry or anything, though, more like "pssh, NO IT ISN'T, ugh."

However, when I got to writing it, I got the idea for the "old friend" to be an older biker. And then I thought it would be cool if it were like... an old mentor. And then I was like... but wait. What if it was an old mentor of DAIYA'S???? And then... Daisuke was born, ha. Also, random, but I hadn't meant for both Daiya and Daisuke to have Dai in their names, I just was looking at male Japanese names, and liked that one. It also means "great help," apparently, which may also have been part of why I named him that, but I don't quite remember.

The more I wrote Daisuke and Mondo together, the more I liked them, honestly. I began to really like the idea of Daiya having a mentor that Mondo was distant with, mostly due to guilt and wanting to prove himself. I kind of regretted not being able to have Daisuke in the story more, since it wouldn't have made much sense with the constraints I had with following TPWP. But I think it makes sense why Mondo wouldn't want to talk to Daisuke again after everything that happened. With how repressed Mondo was, he couldn't even think of seeing Daisuke again after everything he said. Even with where Mondo is now in the story, which him being more accepting of his feelings, the thought of talking to Daisuke would be unbearable to him.

Now! As much as I'd love to go on and on forever, I do need to stop or else this ask will be the length of TPWP and TPWM combined. So, here's the commentary on your sections.

"Oh, shit, if it ain’t lil’ Mondo Fuckin’ Owada, goddamn. How the fuck is it goin’, kid? S’only been, what... a year, two, since ya last called?"

"Oh, yeah? Yer just ‘in Tokyo’ now? Like I don’t fuckin’ know that yer attendin’ that pretentious as fuck institute. Ya don’t call me since yer brother died, an’ all I fuckin’ get is ‘I’ve been busy,’ ‘fore ya go on with yer request. Well, if ya want me ta do whatever the fuck ya need done, yer gonna hafta give more detail than that, squirt. How the fuck did that even happen? Didn’t think Hope’s fuckin’ Peak would be the kind ta take in a biker. Ain’t like ya don’t deserve it, but damn, kid. Goin’ places, ain’t ya?"

(I'm going to talk about the entire scene with Mondo and Daisuke here, since it will be easier than just the paragraphs you put, if that's okay.)

For this scene, I mostly wanted to get some exposition about Mondo and Daisuke's relationship out of the way, letting y'all know how Mondo knew this person he's calling, as well as explaining why the man was never mentioned before this scene. An estranged mentor figure seemed the best way to go. Also, fun fact: I kind of based Daisuke off of Bobby Singer, from Supernatural. I had written my SPN fic before writing TPWP, so I was familiar with writing Bobby.

When looking at the rest of that scene, I mostly wanted to show that Daisuke knew Mondo really well, and that he could tell pretty much immediately that Mondo at least really liked Taka, if not was in love with him. Daisuke always suspected Mondo was bi, and even suspected that of Daiya (since in this universe, I kind of figure that Daiya was also bi, but because of his hatred of his father, denied it as strongly as Mondo always did. Maybe even more so, since Daiya had to be the "big brother" and take care of his little bro), which I wanted to show in this scene without being too explicit.

Overall, I just... wanted to have Mondo and Daisuke to have a realistic relationship to one another. I wanted to show that Mondo has someone out there who knows him and who cares about him, even if Mondo is too damaged and guilt ridden to see it. I also wanted to set up for the next scene, which I'll talk about next.

"So, fucking... leave me the hell alone. I’m gonna fucking leave now and I- I don’t ever wanna see yer goddamn face again. Forget my number and never contact me again. You understand me?"

"I... shit. Fuckin’... shit. Still so fuckin’ stubborn, ain’t ya...? God... god fuckin’ dammit. Fine. Fine. Ya wanna live the rest a’ yer life with yer head in the goddamn sand, be my fuckin’ guest. Cut me out, don’t talk ta me ever again. Do whatever the fuck ya like. "

Now, THIS scene... so, the whole second scene with Mondo and Daisuke was where I wanted Mondo to hear from someone who knows him intimately that he is straight up in love with Taka. Rather than just hearing it from a newly acquired friend, like Leon, he's hearing it from someone who has known him since he was "a snot nosed little kid," which makes it more meaningful to Mondo.

This scene here, this is Mondo rejecting it. He doesn't want to hear what Daisuke has to say. He doesn't want to acknowledge his love for Taka, or hear from someone who knows him that what he's feeling isn't platonic, brotherly feelings. So, he reacts the only way he knows how, which is to push people away through any means possible. However, instead of getting blindingly angry, he grows cold and closed off. This is my way of showing that Mondo is truly upset by what Daisuke said. He's not responding with his usual anger, but a different, more potent and frigid anger. Anger mixed with fear, I suppose. I just... wanted to show how terrified Mondo was to love Taka. He wasn't just angry with Daisuke. He was terrified.

And Daisuke saw that. He realized in this moment just how repressed Mondo was, and in that paragraph, Daisuke was seeing just how dead set Mondo was on being miserable for the rest of his life. And it made him feel both angry on Mondo's behalf, but also resigned. You can't make anyone do anything or see things the way you see them, even people you love, and Daisuke was feeling that there. It's why I had him go on to say that Mondo shouldn't let Taka go easily, to hold on and never let go. He knew Mondo was stubborn as a bull and would likely never contact him again, so he didn't want him to leave without having someone-- anyone-- tell him how important Taka was for him.

Mostly, I wanted Mondo to hear from a source that knew him how important Taka was, and I wanted to show how violently Mondo reacted to hearing it. But not just violently; differently, too. It's not his usual anger. It's more. But then, later on, he still goes on that not-a-date date with Taka, he still holds him close and looks up at the stars. He still loves him, even with how terrified he is, since it's not something he can just ignore anymore. Even if he wants to reject Taka and his love, he physically can't. That's why he got the wine and not the whiskey. That's why he took Taka on the ride even despite his earlier terror. He loves him so much that he can't be away from him even when he's scared.

Overall, Daisuke's role was to open Mondo's eyes to his feelings, and for Mondo to force his eyes shut. I wanted y'all to know that MONDO KNOWS how he feels. He knows, he knows, he knows. But he doesn't want to know, and so he doesn't. If any of that makes any sense and isn't just pretentious babble 😅

So! I'm done, ha. Sorry for the avalanche of text, but I guess that's what you signed up for with that ask. Basically, I have a lot of thoughts and feelings about Daisuke and Mondo's relationship, and if I weren't so burnt out with everything going on, I would write a sequel with Daisuke in it. I had been starting a fic with Taka accidentally meeting Daisuke, based on an ask I got, but it's sadly on the indefinite backburner too. I really like the idea of Mondo having an older, mentor figure who was close to Daiya, though, and it makes me very happy to know other people liked that dynamic too. Thanks a lot for the ask, I really appreciated it!! :-D

[ganymedesbussy]

idea: sexually transmitted witcherdom

so, reading fanfic, as one does, and I really appreciate it when folks give Geralt black jizz when he's taken potions

I could see a scenario where he doesn't fuck people when he's on potions because what if it's toxic, but ALSO what if getting fucked by a be-potioned Witcher makes the person... I dunno, in some manner more compatible to being fucked again by one in the future

like whoops looks like you fucked me so hard I heal faster now or whoops I can take a knot now without issue

mutates someone into a Witcher but real slowly, and actually safely or at least, if it's unsafe, the person feels unwell and can just. you know. stop.

god there's all kinds of terrible ways that could go if that was the case and the knowledge got out there

but you could also have, like mentor-mentee relationships out on the Path, training up your witcher trainee and fuckin' on the reg to mutate them

and then there's Jaskier, the Witcher Bard, who doesn't fight (though he could), and made his ass the laboratory that led to this discovery

jask being like 'is it me, or is this town way louder than normal?

surely someone has thought of this before

like I'm imagining the progression was Geralt comes back from a hunt still hopped up on go juice, Jask is into it, but he's like 'no it's probably toxic'

'I've had your blood on me so much if it was toxic we'd know'

then it becomes a regular thing to work out the extra potion energy could even explain why he doesn't age

I wonder how long it would take before you could have your witcher bar mitzvah

[evilminji]

Oh God No. Y-Young Midoriya. Please! J-Just back away from the wild animal and don't give in to his sweet, sweet, corrupting words of mental stimulation. Just come to your mentor, young Midoriya! Don't make eye contact with him, they start lecturing!!

It's like the curse of "May Your Children Be JUST LIKE YOOOOOOU" but somehow worse.

As though OfA took that curse, said "BET" and combined ALL OF THEM into one nightmare child for Yagi to parent. Young Midoriya, NO! He may love Dave like a brother, but HE NEARLY FUCKING DIED! And Dave had a GIRLFRIEND. Who WASN'T insane!

That child is twice as feral and has no minder!

Don't you DARE look at me with those "I Can Fix Him" eyes, young Midoriya! You have a problem and need to stop! Young Bakugo is complicated ENOUGH! Please stop collecting terrible nightmare chil-! And he's already gone. Took his notes too. Off to feed the feral beast, like THAT won't have him crawling in through Young Midoriya's windows and vents for the rest of his natural life.

FffffffffFUUU-[REDACTED IN AMERICAN!!!]

It? Would honestly? Be hilarious? If THIS is what derails Kamino Ward?

The museum IN Kamino Ward.

And since All Might didn't use up his last bit off power? Is sorta dying but held together by modern medicine? Him constantly being AROUND Danny? Is actually probably IMPROVING him health.

Because he's becoming fuckin Limnal. That sweet, sweet Ecto is like "yeah we can take over for these missing organs, no PROBLEM". And for the first time in over a decade? He's starting to first... NOT lose weight. Then? Gain? A little? Is... is that a vaguely healthy flush? Huh. He's breathing a bit... a LOT easier?

But his lung is still gone? How?

And! While HE is confused and trying to wrangle: his health, this nightmare engineering racoon space child, young Midoriya, that B-[REDACTED, All Might you are on RECORD!], and you know... TEACHING?

Midoriya is trying to "Pspspspsps" the Interesting New Friend™! AND keep him away from... HIM. All for One. Who is CLEARLY here for EVIL and Friend Corrupting EVIL purposes! Crime probably! PROBABLY WANTS TO DO SPACE CRIME! Conquer other planets! He's ON TO YOU, ALL FOR ONE! He's going to STOP YOU!

And?

AfO? Waaaasn't THAT invested? Until someone tried to STOP him. Specifically, the OfA idiots tried to stop him.

Well now he's GOTTA.

He could care less about Space and the sciences. Even the money to be made is tangential. The theoretical exploration and possible conquest of the stars? Mildly intriguing, but he's more of a homebody at the moment. But! He always HAS had a thing about people telling him "No". Expressly forbidding.

And really, he was already HERE to humor himself and the deranged crime child. See what he could make from that. He honestly doesn't CARE if Space is his passion project. We all have ours. The doctor's is the Nomu project. He himself collects things. We all have our hobbies.

But?

Then the Oaf's obnoxious little successor blunders in, while he's mid conversion. INTERRUPTING said Actually Interesting Conversation. And nearly destroys the museum AGAIN. Tsk, tsk! For SHAME~ Obnoxious Oaf Number 2! Have you no respect for history or the sciences? The future of mankind?

He unfortunately refuses to LEAVE. Even after the delightful Feral one tears him a new one for threatening his precious collection (perfectly understandable. He too, would murder everyone and everything, if someone dared damage his collection). No, he gets that ANNOYING bullheaded, stubborn glint in his putrid little beady eyes and declares he's going to "help too".

Excuse you? You will NOT.

The little RAT has the GAUL to grin at him, (bare his teeth like a FUCKING ANIMAL!) a practically CHIRP in an OBNOXIOUSLY fake little cutesy voice "why NOT? You're not UP to something, ARE you? We're all here for the pursuit of science and space exploration! Are you afraid you CANT KEEP UP, REPAIR GUY~☆?"

Murder.

He's going to kill this one. It's going to be SLOW. And he's going to ENJOY IT.

You want to fucking GO, you green little boot licker? He has more PHDs then you have years of LIFE. He could carry this program to completion with one hand, concussed, and barely TRYING. If he ACTUALLY puts in any effort? We'd all be sipping champagne in deep space by summers end!

Izuku just stances up, shoulders back, head up. Teeth bared in a "grin".

Fuckin PROVE it then!

Danny? Danny was getting his new team members refreshments and food. Comes back to them at each other's throats but NOT fighting, physically at least, in "his" museum. So..... yay! They're getting along! Proper ghostly communication and friendships all around! Who wants onigiri? I also got some tea.

It becomes the latest installment of the:

✨️AfO vs OfA - THROWNDOWN✨️

Now going on Season (cough, generation, cough) NINE!

Is Danny aware they are using his Space program to war their lil pissing match and try to one up each other? Yes. Will he STOP it? Ha! Fuck no! This is getting SO MUCH done! He sees nothing, knows nothing. Fenton himbo genetics, activate! Fufufufufu~

Okay but? We of the DPxDC? Are COMPLETELY Sleeping on DPXBNHA?

And not even for the Main Plot Shenanigans!

Just?? It has ALL of DC's super powers? But MORE OF THEM. And like 80% of the population has um! Danny can?? Finally achieve his DREAM of being???

JUST SOME DUDE™!

Yeah, he's in Japan. That's a bit of a learning curve. And YEAH, there was a cataclysmic war like a few centuries back that sorta... fucked everybody up. No one wants to talk about it. There may be mass graves and Never Forget memorials. But?

On the SURFACE!

This place seems utopian!

No ghost hunters! Advanced technology! Robust social services*!

Wait... what was that asterisk? What do you mean "corrupt shadowy government organizations"? What do you MEAN "Immortal Supervillians"? NO SPACE PROGRAM!?!? AaaaaAAAAAAAAAAH?!?!? I'M IN HELL!!! This is ACTUALLY THE BAD PLACE, THIS IS HELL, OH GOD NOOOOOOO-!!!!!!

Cause see?

There are SO MANY REASONS he'd end up there?

Think about it! Wish that he lived somewhere his weird biology wouldn't exclude him from becoming an astronaut? In Quirks having Bnha Japan EVERYBODY has weird biology! Y'ain't special! You could TOTALLY be an astronaut!..... if we HAD those! We do not. Shut down that program during the Quirk Wars and never really started it again. (And somewhere, Desiree LAUGHS)

Or MAYBE? Things are getting a little hot on the ground? Bit TOO spicy. The Family Fenton and Friends have fallen back, behind the barely holding shields. Not even the Mansons considerable political maneuvering could stop the inevitably of human fear and blind unthinking hatred. Money can't buy everything, in the end. There is only ONE(1) way out.

Through the Zone.

Plan: Strangers In A Strange World is a go.

They're all Limnal enough to fake it. Sam with her plants. Tucker with his technology and persuasion. Jazz with her limited empathy. Their parents with their... well, weirdness. And with a touch of ghostly assisted meddling? Well, they've always BEEN there! Haven't they?

And that's not to MENTION the random 4 year olds with no control! JUST coming into their powers! With all those big emotions in tiny bodies? Startling events and tantrums? Villian attacks? What could THEY possibly hope to do to control or guide that fresh new power? It does what it does and the rest of us are just along for the ride!

If Danny happens to be minding his business and gets accidentally kidnapped by a VERY distraught 4 year old? Well, that's hardly the KIDS fault, now is it? They're FOUR! That is basically a toddler! Tiny child! They are upset, confused, and didn't mean to do ANYTHING. He's a hero. And Heros don't blame little kids from accidents, no matter HOW stressed it makes them.

No, the curse like a sailor INSIDE their head. Like an ADULT.

Just? Imagine~☆

The slow transition from *starry eyed shoujo sparkles* "This is SO COOL~!" to "huh, that's... kinda weird. And Sus. Weird Sus. Maybe nothing... oh! A distraction!" To "okay, this KEEPS happening, that was shady. You all saw that right? You realize that's not NORMAL, right? That that's fucked up? Not cool?" To "oh god, oh God, OH GOD! I'm in HELL! This is actually HELL! I'm trapped in HELL!!! WHAT THE FUC-"

Like? This kid LOVES space. LOVES the stars. And this is one of the few Superhero Cannon that SPECIFICALLY MENTIONS that IN CANNON? Thanks to Quirks? As in Superpowers? That VERY THING got fuckin SCRAPPED. Gutted. Consigned to be a relic of the past so they could all focus on punching each other Real Good.

He would weep BLOOD. Chew the WALLS. The LEVEL of unhinged this child would unleash? Not as Danny Phantom... but as DANNY J. FENTON? Beautiful. Vaguely psychotic. Definitely doing the Fenton Name proud. God, the NOISE HE WOULD MAKE would be inhuman and yet somehow? Come entirely from his human half.

They👏 Would👏 Hear👏 BOSS👏 MUSIC👏

I don't even know if he'd CARE about the main characters. They'd be tangential at best. The man would be in a one man war with I-Island over their lack of space program and hoarding of scientific progress. Probably living out of an abandoned building or forgotten subway station. Just? The MOST bedraggled, feral genius to ever haunt Japan.

As opposed to the REFINED feral genius. Who is Nedzu.

I bet Danny stands outside his school at one AM waving his scientific papers at a camera and YELLS. Like a deranged lunatic. Mismatched slippers and a "haven't slept in a week" crazed glint in his eyes.

He's Nedzu's new best friend. They GET each other.

And, yes, Nedzu COULD let him in... but it's faster to just let him yell and read the papers through the camera. Who CARES if they both seem insane! Let's shout about advanced physics and engineering at 1 am! Over the speakers!!! Oh? You need to physically SHOW me the notes? Well I COULD unlock the gates... OR just wait for you to finish scrambling up the walls like a feral Racoon, to then throw yourself OVER them.

Either, Or.

I'm just SAYING! We are SLEEPING on this! There is so, SO much fun to be had! Danny breaks rules and minds! His outrage over injustice and the complete lack of SPACE! His protection instincts going BUCK FUCKIN WILD. The INDESCRIBABLE hate boner he would have for Mr. "Lemme just rip parts of your soul out so I can collect your powers like pokemon cards" AfO.

There? Is SO MUCH, guys. SO MUCH!

@hdgnj @the-witchhunter @babbling-babull @hypewinter @nerdpoe @lolottes @dcxdpdabbles @mutable-manifestation

[dialovers-translations]

Diabolik Lovers LOST EDEN ー Ayato Dark [Epilogue]

ー The scene starts in front of the Sakamaki manor

???: Ahーah. He really went all out again. 

Yui: ...?

*Rustle*

???: Everything alright? Are you hurt in any way?

Yui: ( Who is this guy...? )

I’m fine...Anyway, who are you...?

Kino: Ah, right, I have yet to introduce myself, don’t I? My bad. My name’s Kino. 

Yet another son of the almighty Karlheinz...In other words, I guess you could say I’m the Demon World’s Prince Zero. 

Yui: Karlheinz-san’s...son...?

( Then, this guy is also...One of the guys’ brothers...!? )

( But that was never brought up even once up until now... )

Kino: I don’t blame you for being surprised, but don’t you think we should move away from here first?

ー They can hear a siren in the background

Yui: ...

( A police car... )

( Right. Last time Reiji-san skillfully handled the situation. )

( But things will get sticky if the police and a bunch of lookie-looks show up. )

( It’s not like they’ll believe us...if we say that someone’s magic went out of control... )

*Rustle rustle*

Yui: Y-You guys...! Wake up! We have to hurry and...

Kanato: ...

Laito: ...

Yui: ( ...It’s no use...Seems like everyone is still out cold... )

Kino: No need to panic. Just leave it to me, okay? Hey gang! I’m leaving the rest up to you!

*Whistle*

ー A bunch of ghouls arrive

Yui: ( ...Who are these men...? )

Monologue

The group of men, 

which arrived on Kino-kun’s command,

lifted the Sakamaki brothers on their backs without speaking a word. 

Escorted by Kino-kun,

I also left the place. 

While the only thing on my mind,

was Ayato-kun’s sudden disappearance,

for now I had no other choice but to go with him. 

*TIMESKIP*

ー The scene shifts to Eden

Ruki: I see. Good job. You may leave now.

*Flap flap flap*

Ruki: ...

ー The others walk up to him

Kou: Huh~? What’s wrong, Ruki-kun? You look awfully conflicted for some reason.

Azusa: Did that Familiar just now come to report something...?

Ruki: Yes. It appears that trouble has occurred in the human world.

Yuma: The human world...Don’t tell me those Sakamaki’s fucked up again? 

Ruki: Unfortunately, that is exactly what happened.

Yuma: Haah? For real? They’re just as hopeless as ever...God...

Kou: So? What happened exactly?

Ruki: Apparently Sakamaki Ayato’s powers went berserk again. As a result, the manor was flattened with the ground once more...

Kou: ...Ahーah. Didn’t they just finish rebuilding it too?

Yuma: That guy never learns, does he...? Will everythin’ be ‘kay with an heir like that...?

Ruki: Of course, that is what we feared. That is exactly why that man’s younger brother, Lord Richter, willingly offered to head to the human world to become Ayato’s mentor, however...

Kou: ...Lord Richter did...?

Yuma: Are ya sure that’s a good idea? Didn’t that guy plot some shit with the Founders before...?

Ruki: That is what had me worried as well. Therefore, I was actually just about to send my Familiars over to the human world to check up on the situation. 

But what could have happened over there...? I believe I will have to look into the matter. 

Kou: Yeah. I just hope it’s nothing serious. 

Like he got a bit too overly excited and it was just a mere slip of the hand~? 

Yuma: Ya don’t blow up a whole manor from a lil’ ‘slip of the hand’, do ya?

Besides, since he’s the heir to the throne, that makes him the current Vampire King, right? 

So can he really be fuckin’ ‘round like that...? There’s a bunch of shit goin’ on over here in the Demon World too.

Kou: How should I put it? Sure, he might officially be the ‘King’, but right now, Ayato-kun reminds me more of the guy from the ‘Emperor’s New Clothes.’ (1)

Ruki: The Emperor’s New Clothes, huh? You might not be too far off...

Ever since Karlheinz-san’s passing, Eden has been decaying.

The current situation shows that the current King - Ayato - is still mentally unstable. 

Azusa: We don’t know what happened but...I wonder if Eden will return to normal...once Ayato-san learns to keep his calm...

Ruki: I...can not answer that question either. 

Eden is a place which reflects its owner’s state of mind. 

If Ayato truly has what it takes to become a King just like that man was by finding peace of mind again, this place should return to its previous state. 

However, the problem is whether or not he...

Kou: ...What’s wrong?

Ruki: No, it’s nothing. Anyway, I’m going to head out.

ー Ruki walks towards the door

Yuma: Headin’ out? At this hour? Where are ya goin’?

Ruki: Yes. There is someone I must meet as soon as possible. 

I might not return right away, but I will send a message through my Familiars if something happens. 

Kou: S-Sure...Gotcha...

Azusa: Be careful, okay...? 

ー Ruki steps out into the hallway

Ruki: ...This time around, I am not very confident in the situation either.

Is this truly the right course of events...?

ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー

Translation notes

(1) 裸の王様 or ‘hadaka no ou-sama’ which literally means ‘the naked King’, is the Japanese title of the popular fairytale ‘The Emperor’s New Clothes’. It is also used to describe someone who, despite their high position, does not know how to set their own priorities and has a warped version of reality. (Just like how the emperor in the story would spend all his money on clothes)

[miss-lucy-not-westenra]

okay hi hello it is Late, i am Tired, and i have Thoughts About Dracula And Misogyny and i’m going to make that your problem

i’ve read a lot of things talking about dracula and women, ranging from the role that women play in the story, how the story demonizes women, and how the story is one big example of bram stoker’s misogyny. and oh my GOD this pisses me off so fucking much

i’m not trying to say bram stoker wasn’t a misogynist. i don’t know him. maybe he hated women. but when it comes to female characters who are written by men, lucy and mina are actually uhhhhh pretty fuckin’ dope. or at least nowhere near as bad as other examples. their voices may be similar, sure, but they’re distinct enough that if you give me two excerpts from dracula, one from lucy’s diary and one from mina’s diary, i would be able to venture a guess with a good amount of confidence. there are tonal differences that suit them as characters, and differences in length that remain consistent to their previous characterization. they aren’t the deepest, most multi-layered female characters to exist ever, but they certainly aren’t noticeably less complex than the male characters. like, when you look at the story, it’s kinda centered around them and the men tend to be referred to as “lucy’s suitors” and “mina’s husband” (and then van helsing, resident wacky mentor)

and i also feel like the way someone talks about lucy westenra is just going to be so revealing as to how they view women and femininity. because the amount of things i’ve read that call her “ditzy” and “shallow” and “oversexualized” are alarming. it just makes me wonder, where are they getting these words from? is it because lucy is characterized as a friendly and likable person? is it because she’s shown to be sensitive? is it because she fulfills the role of the damsel in distress? is it because she gets three proposals in one day?

all of the criticism around lucy being an “icon of misogyny” comes back to the fact that she possesses purely feminine traits. she’s sweet, she’s sensitive, and people like her. she’s not physically strong, she’s not a brainiac, and she can’t fight the vampire off on her own. but why does that make her bad representation? there are real women whose strengths don’t lie in physical ability or academic intelligence, and instead lie in their social skills and the ways that they connect with and care about others

(not to mention the whole “woman gets three proposals in one day = whore” conclusion, which is just wrong on so many goddamn levels)

and like, i’m (not) sorry, but what do you WANT from her? do you want her to stand up to van helsing and yell at him? she’s NINETEEN. he has MULTIPLE DEGREES. she is being REGULARLY MENACED BY A SEVERE GOTHIC THREAT. and nobody knows what the fuck a vampire is! not to mention the fact that i don’t think van helsing would actually listen to her even if she did try to stand up to him, regardless of whether or not she knew what she was talking about!

i just have so many thoughts about her. she deserves better than most interpretations, and it’s insulting how every single adaptation completely fucks her up. jazzy crows, i’m going to bed. goodnight.

[yb-cringe]

Pspspsps please go off about somft rose bling stuff, maybe perhaps a bit of something to do with Gem being frozen/corrupted 👀👀

GOD thank you for the excuse to pop off abt these two.

I have a Lot of thoughts abt c!Gem and im starting this by saying like. 90% of this is speculation and im just having a grand ole time w the character stuff and despite this i will defend this until i die sorry /j

ah yes. the corruption crumb. also known as the golden age of roseblings—

- the first thing fwhip does upon seeing gem w the white hair streak is ask what happened. whys this important? cause roseblings are Not confrontational. they’re violent, sure, but when push comes to shove they don’t stick around and ask questions (think sausage’s corruption arc. they fuckin RAN) they are Self Interest Motivated. the only exception being when the other is in danger/at risk.

- the other side of their non confrontation is pretending everything is fine when its not as to not worry someone. fwhip’s grimland castle has a space to two leaders, but one throne is covered in cobwebs and empty, while his is well used. obviously- this bothers him. and it can be assumed the throne is for gem, though she’s never been the monarch type like her brother. Gem, on the other hand, fully ignored everything to do with how Not Fine she is after the ice blast, and does whatever it takes to assure Fwhip that shes Okay, even though she clearly knows she’s not.

- a bit unrelated but gem’s never snapped at anyone like she snapped at scott, and i think its worth mentioning that it happened in an educational student to mentor situation. and that gem mightve been mirroring a behavior. im just saying.

- fwhip 👏 trying 👏 to kill 👏 scott 👏 for hurting 👏 his sister 👏 was SUCH a good bit! especially cause at the time gem wasnt even seriously hurt but thats! the rosebling! way! they fuck ppl up!

- also to note that gem seemed to Probably be aware that Fwhip was doing something (“wouldnt want fwhip to be getting into any danger, I happen to need him. quite a lot.”) (“scott’s ice powers are pretty serious so I don’t think you should… tinker with him.”) but her issue isnt immorality she’s more concerned that fwhip could get himself hurt in the process

- I don’t even think this whole corruption thing made Fwhip scared I think it made him more Nervous than anything. because it felt like he definitely saw the potential of what this could be, maybe from seeing it unravel Sausage, and he just couldn’t watch his sister go through it. so he ends up nervously flittering around the topic and the room and mumbling “nope, no, no.” as like. a verbal self soothe of ‘this isnt happening. its not happening. this isnt happening to her’

- super interesting that gem Completely hid everything that had to do with her own personal issues away from Fwhip. he had to pry the info from her. which makes me think she doesnt Usually tell him when something is wrong, in her own secretive way of protecting him. What he doesnt know can’t hurt him, and Fwhip shows some minor signs of overthinking and general nervousness like Gem, so I wonder if she recognized that habit and started hiding things in hopes that he could potentially be less stressed than her? but instead that gave them distance, leading to the sort of. awkward empty vibe that two grimland thrones but only one ruler, gives? food for thought

[lovestoned-ophelia]

BRIDGERTON SEASON 2 TRAILER BREAKDOWN

(As someone who’s working her way though the books, and is on number four, and has found a new hyperfixation)

HOOOOOOOOOOLY SHIT IM SO HYPED!! BOOK 2 WAS MY FAV SO FAR, (I’m on book four) AND I CANT WAIT TO DIE ABT IT

OKOKOKOKOK HERE ARE SOME OBSERVATIONS:

it looks like they’re really gonna play with the whole Whistledown/Penelope thing this season, so that’ll definitely keep things fresh & off book. I kinda forgot the Queen existed in the world of the show, and personally, it’s a welcome addition now that I know what to expect from the main plot, so I can be surprised by tv exclusive characters and plot lines.

KATE AND EDWINA!!!!! EDWINA AND KATE!!! MY DARLINGS! MY BELOVEDS!!! The casting is so insanely perfect!! Edwina seems just as cute, proper, and doe eyed as she was in the book, LOOK AT HER LIL PINK DRESSES MY B A B E Y!!! She’s canonically like 17 so I’m positive they’re gonna age her up, which is very rad.

It looks like Lady Danbury is going to be sponsoring the girls, and for the route the show takes, it’s such a great choice!! Lady Danbury isn’t an integral character in the books, especially not the first few, and making her a matriarchal or mentor figure for other characters in the show is SUCCHHHH an amazing idea. Love a bad bitch💜

I like the teeny differences I see already! Like Newton being uneasy with Anthony from the start, instead of being a Good Boy™️ right away.

ALSO NEWTON :DDDDD DOGGY

I can bet money they’re going to change the word Pall Mall to croquet.

From the promo pics, I assume they’re gonna do hunting flashbacks with Anthony and Edmund. I can’t find exactly where Kate fits in there though.

GOD I HOPE THE BEE STING MOMENT®️ IS STILL THERE!!! MAYBE THE FUNNIEST PART IN THE BOOK, AND A GOOFY HILARIOUS MISCOMMUNICATION.

I like the consistency with wardrobe, (particularly the featheringtons) and how they’re keeping Penelope in the gaudy fits until much later.

Eloise is out now ig! Ik her and Penelope are sort of having their own little B plot throughout the season, and idk if I’m looking forward to it. I kind of lean in favor of book Eloise as opposed to Netflix Eloise ngl. That might change though!

I LOOOVE the snippet we got of the Bridgerton Boys at the races with nearly identical fits bc all they talk about in the books is how it’s hard to tell them apart sometimes.

Speaking of, if seems like we’ll be getting more Benedict and Colin this season!!!

Benedict had more of a personality in the first season of the show than he did in the books until his own, and even then it didn’t exactly feel like something earned. J like how we’re building up to him (maybe my fav brother)

Hyped to see further Colin mischief

I SAW ANTHONY WITH THE PINK MALLET IM SO EXCITED

Seeing Daphne again made me smile. Simon is in the Pall Mall game in the book, but we already know he’s not showing up this season. But we DO get a baby!!! That child looks so fuckin precious!!

The way he LOOKS at Kate!! WMMMMM ghhhhhhhhhhh

Kinda sad that the River incident doesn’t happen via Newton chase, but I’m satiated because of that bit where he’s angrily getting out of the water.

speaking of,,,,,,, W-WROW🥵😳

Kate Sharma is a lucky lucky woman 😭😭😭😭

I think that’s all I have to say about it for now but AAAAAAAAAAA

I wont be able to stop blabbing about it, and I know I’m going to be veeeeery frustrated when it gets more hype again. I watched/read the bridgerton series once the hype died, and now I don’t think I’m gonna survive its return. I’m gonna have to try and zip my lips at every turn and force my own opinions down my throat so I don’t,,,, y’know,,,,, kill ppl-

ANYWAY THATS IT

Love y’all!!

[bitter-sweet-coffee]

more late night thoughts because i cant sleep and i wanna talk abt shadow!

now... look. i'm not gonna meme this and slap a #daddyissues on the guy, but let's unpack his strong preference for female companions (and that wasn't an intentional doctor who joke, @authorleaandres has to stop enabling the crossovers)

maria: self explanatory, but basically the blueprint!

rouge: the person closest to him, whom he trusts the most (debatable but i believe it to be true and y'all know i'm the only correct sonic opinion ever)

amy: the person who literally made him remember his purpose, which enabled him to sacrifice himself for the earth. also, when she hugged him by mistake in SA2 he didn't react negatively, despite showing a distaste for physical contact in canon (especially unannounced or nonconsentually!)

let's compare this to:

sonic: his literal rival. say what you want about sonadow and i'm not denying their mutual unspoken respect and bond, but their arrogance clashes for a reason: they're meant to not get along!

knuckles: they're literally so fuckin tense and bitter with each other, it's amusing but unsurprising given their respective isolations, arrogance, and tendency to rival others and question everyone's actions with distaste

silver: kicKS HIM IN THE FUCKING HEAD! yeah he's somewhat impressed with the guy and mentors him, but onwards they seldom get along unless it's for the greater good (silver doesn't trust him).

okay, these are the biggest ones but i'll do some other brief ones:

infinite: generated his villain arc and kicked him in the head too

vector: mehhh... walks away from him and only half helps him (plus it's up to you!) in his game. if you count sonic x he's kind of a dick to vector too lmao

eggman: respects him more than most of the cast, but also fucks his shit up a lot

black doom: ... skip so i dont make the lamest joke

gerald: ... skip again for the same reasons

mephiles: arguably shadow's best foe because their relationship fucking rules i love it UGH someone remind me to make a post on them

okay okay you get the point, shadow and guys don't seem to work out off the bat... but it feels like i'm skipping some important male characters, right? AM I...? NO.

omega: his other best friend alongside rouge who he cares for so damn much i don't even need to elaborate. aha, omega is a ROBOT.

metal sonic: he has such a sad yet beautiful sense of compassion for the lil fella; him and omega recover his body in heroes, shadow is always looking out for him, and also THE ENTIRETY OF RIVALS 2 OH MY GOD. oh yeah, metal sonic is also a robot!

charmy bee: now it might seem weird to bring him up because shadow doesn't have to be nice to him (just like with vector) but unlike the chill croc, charmy IDOLIZES shadow and is generally considered the most annoying character besides like, omochao. (sorry charmy you irritating thing, i love you but i get why others don't!). just like with amy, shadow could very explicitly tell charmy to fuck off, but he doesn't. why? HE IS A CHILD. the fact he lets charmy stick around and has been present enough in the kid's life to be a role model... i need to draw them 🥺

tails: even though they've worked against each other, shadow seems to admire tails' intelligence and innovation, and has worked with him on occasion. besides boom and x where he beats the shit out of tails, shadow does like the guy. why? he is ALSO A CHILD! however he is a wee bit older which is why shadow sometimes wants to kick him around a bit :") (side note: these are the only two *main canons that give tails a confirmed love interest: cosmo and zooey. old enough to date? old enough to get kicked by shadow!)

notice a trend? yeah. by just taking a handful of characters (arguably the ones closest to shadow in game lore) it's clear that shadow is drawn to the female cast and generally more comfortable with them. robots can be gendered i GUESS, but they're literally non binary y'all idk what to tell you 😭 also children don't count. unless you're holding hands which means you'll catch those hands!

i'm not saying shadow hates men or anything (i mean it would be funny though for the memes) but it's clear that he has issues with authority... male authority. male... fathers who have manipulated and weaponized him... and his only positive formative experience pre big T trauma was a girl... maria... y'all see it right? i dont have to spell it out or make a joke 😎

if you're wondering why i left espio out specifically because they get along really well off the bat, it's because clearly they have mutual unspoken crushes bc they're fruity. i'm literally not biased lmao WHAT no i'm not debunking sonadow and infinadow and whatever other ships y'all have because i'm getting shadpio brainrot... lol no thats not me!

SO TLDR: shadow feels safer with female identifying characters, technically genderless characters, and non binary entities even if they're masc coded bc robot brr. GOT THAT? NO FUCKING TERFS HERE BC EVERYONE IN SONIC IS GAY AND TRANS SO DONT EVEN TRY RUINING THIS

if you made it this far into one of my late night shenanigan posts, then you know me well enough that the bar is on the floor so uh:

(it's muffled bc he's blasting it on the ARK and this is what the planet hears)

[garrothromeave]

let’s talk about minecraft diaries rebirth.

and why it’s literally amazing. (warning: this will contain spoilers. lots of them. also, long post ahead.)

i think a lot of people hate mcdr because they were expecting a remake; but the point of rebirth is for jess to rewrite it. it wasn't supposed to be exactly the same.

honestly i went into mcdr with a closed mind. as an og mcd fan, i thought that this was going to suck ass and that i'd rant about how bad it was to my friends later. but actually watching it, i just... couldn't help but immediately fall in love with it.

ik im probably the only motherfucker that likes mcdr, but honestly how could i not? for one, garroth and zenix actually have personalities at the beginning. AND; the villagers? actually amazing. donna made me smile, visher made me laugh and cry, brendan was just bein as good as ever. like... i even didn't despise emmalyn with every ounce of my soul like i usually do?? the characterizations of them were GOOD, man.

and honestly, aphmau like--the way she spoke, her whole thing. it was reallyyy well done in my opinion. she was oblivious to things, but it wasn't overdone and wasn't done in a way to make her annoying. she's a very appealing character in mcdr, a main protagonist i do not mind following along with. her dynamics to the characters are really cool and all very unique.  gonna cut it here so i don’t clog y’all’s feed cuz i got a lot to say :)

the early use of aphmau’s powers was actually pretty cool as well, it also really showed how clueless aphmau really was to everything going on around her. AND UH, THE FACT THAT SHE THOUGHT THAT GARROTH FELT FAMILIAR? GOLDEN. absolutely golden.

AND GENE OH BOY, the early introduction of gene? ik a lot of people are upset about it, but god DAMN i love it so much. his role in the story is very important in original, and i cannot express how much joy this brought me learning that he was actually getting the proper attention for it. and the fact that gene and aphmau were working together?? i mean ik gene was just trying to use her to get back to the "shadow abyss" (pretty pog replacement for the nether, gg) but god DAMN i loved every moment of it. i found their dynamic to be pretty fuckin funny to be honest, would absolutely love to see more of it.

i might be biased considering gene is one of my absolute favorite characters, but i honestly think that introducing gene this early on in the story was a good move. again, he's literally the right-hand man to the shadow lord. it makes you really wonder why he didn't have as much of an important role in season 1 or even 2 of the original mcd plotline. also, we get some of that good-ol-fashioned exposition with seeing early on how vylad and gene interact. vylad’s at a very strange point in the story right now; his motives are unclear, even to the side he’s ‘supposed’ to be taking (aka, a shadow knight.)  another early introduction to a character is zane! this, my friends, is good. really good. i’d say that zane is the main antagonist of season 1 in the original series--and he wasn’t even introduced until like, episode 50. it’s not necessarily a bad thing, but him being introduced this early on really gives the audience a better understanding of what threats are out there and what our protagonist will have to encounter in the future. in the original series, there’s not much explanation as to why lords are disappearing/dying left and right--and while yes, that was supposed to be the mystery of it, having some of that early information is a better move in terms of writing. 

AND IVAN?? BEING A PART OF THE JURY OF NINE?? I COULD NOT HAVE ASKED FOR ANYTHING MORE LIKE GOD DAMN that was a very pleasant surprise i'll just say that, thank you jess :)

and no i did not loop the 4 minutes of screentime laurance got in that one episode haha who would do that i would never do that anyways

SPEAKING of laurance, im so glad jess actually wrote him in this early :) she totally could have just waited for the first time aphmau visits meteli and meets him there, but no! she put him in an early episode. i dont even care if she did it just to shut up the fans about laurance but man that made me so happy seeing him, even if it was only for a bit.

okay i kinda wanna go over the guards real fast firstly; garroth. ignoring how weird the helmet showing emotions is, i really like how garroth is portrayed. he's under a lot of pressure because the village is putting a lot of the blame on him for malik's death, and he's trying his hardest to keep things running. the fact that garroth utterly refused the to take up the position of lord and even got a little snappy about it was actually really cool to see as well. and while he doesn’t have that same “reserved, quiet, observant” feel as the original mcd version of him had, this version of garroth is absolutely awesome. he’s more direct and blunt, is significantly more sarcastic, and isn’t as stiff or as much as a pushover as he is in the original. he even has a sense of humour. also, no homo, but he’s kinda adorable.  plus, the desperation that he goes through during the whole thing is just--it’s really cool to see how hard he’s trying to prove himself and help the village. my rating for mcdr garroth? 9/10. the helmet... the helmet is the main thing throwin me off, i can’t lie. next, zenix. oh BOY do i have a lot to say about this man. first of all, his and garroth’s dynamic is incredible. when i saw how the interacted with each other, my first thought was: father and son. zenix has this immaturity to him that is so fucking fun and interesting to watch, and seeing how garroth scolds him is so fuckin good man. and! seeing how he interacts with the rest of the village... honestly, if jess ever picks this story up again, i would probably cry when zenix (literally) backstabs garroth. HELL, i hope that’s something that still happens, it’d be heartbreaking to witness this character that we’ve come to love hurting his mentor, the man who took him in. he’s just a really good character all in all, and much more appealing than the original mcd zenix. ...except season 3 zenix. no zenix can be better than that one.  either way, zenix is amazing written to be the comic relief and he’s just an all-out lovable character in this series.  finally, dale and brian. yes i’m going to group them up because there’s not much to say regarding them, but i do want to address them. for starters, we have brian; who’s already 16 when the story starts. good on jess for doing that, because in the original aphmau watched brian be born and age INCREDIBLY quick, haha. THOUGH i do feel like there’s a slight connection lost there--one of the hardest things about brian’s betrayal in the original series in the fact that we watched him grow up in phoenix drop. we were there from the moment he was born, to the second he betrayed phoenix drop. BUT OF COURSE, this version is a lot more realistic, so it’s understandable. i just think that if it’s brian who’ll be betraying phoenix drop again (if it even goes down that same route), it won’t hit as hard unless jess really takes the time to grow the connection between brian and aphmau.  as for dale; gotta admit, love it. and like, i think one of the main things about how good of a call it was to make him a drunkard from the beginning is considering how much the village is struggling. the fact that the second-in-command is literally drunk all of the time really conveys the message of, “yeah. this village needs help.” plus, he’s another good comic relief character. i loved seeing molly and dale’s relationship too, it was very funny.  PLUS. we were blessed with a well scene, in which aphmau had to help villagers out of the well. i don’t know about you guys, but that was one of my favorite nods to the original series. i cannot thank jess enough for that, there was a smile on my face the entire time. another amazing thing--visher’s character. instead of just being introduced to this quirky lil merchant who only had one or two interactions with aphmau like in the first one, we got to sit there and really get a feel for someone worth remembering and worth mourning over. we had a reason to be sad over his death, it wasn’t just some npc getting blown up suddenly. this was different, and this hurt.  one of the major things that i hope is to come out of this is for jess to fix the major mistakes she had when writing the first series. she’d expressed how unhappy she was with some of the decisions she made, and i’m glad that she’s getting that second chance to undo the things she didn’t like. this series also gives her a second chance to really, really dig into characters and their motives. like, gimme laurance backstory in better detail. or like, garroth and zane’s relationship from back when they were kids? or how vylad died and who killed him? etc etc. she’s already done an excellent job so far, and i can’t wait to see where this goes. that is, if she ever continues it. god, i wish there were more episodes so that i could seriously let you guys know how beautiful of a series this is. there’s so much i want to say about rebirth, but i think i’ll stop here. i might say some more shit about it later, but if there’s anything i’d want you to take away from this, it’s: give minecraft diaries rebirth a chance. there’s a lot of potential, and this is a chance for jess to really change things for the better! ... but again, that is if this ever is continued.