#god i don’t even know what imm gonna do. i mean i do know but it’s just!!

[ectoplasmer]

hey. hey guess what monday is

[agaypanic]

could you wrote an angst smut for reese wilkerson after a fight where reese was in the wrong and wants to apologize? 💓 love your stuff

Making It Up (Reese Wilkerson X Reader)

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Summary: Sometimes, Reese isn’t good at apologizing with words. So he finds a new way to express his remorse after a fight.

CW: p in v intercourse, make up sex, oral sex (fem receiving), fingering

***

Reese seemed a little irritable this week. You have no clue what it was about but chalked it up to his family or school. One of the usual things that caused his sourness. You sat in his room while he walked back and forth, grumbling about something you couldn’t understand. Whenever you tried to ask, he just waved you off.

“Reese, do you want something to eat? Or maybe lay down or something?” You asked. Those usually seemed to put him in a better mood. Instead, he rolled his eyes.

“No.” He said, exasperated.

“Okay.” You stayed in the chair, drumming a light beat on your thighs as you tried to think of what to say. “Is there anything I can-“

“No!” He whipped around to stare at you. You flinched at his sudden outburst. “I don’t need you to do anything. God, it’s like you’re suffocating me; you’re so clingy.”

The two of you felt frozen in place as his words hung in the air. Reese had never been this harsh towards you; neither of you knew how to proceed.

“Y/n, I’m sorry-”

“No, it’s fine.” You stood up abruptly, grabbing your bag from the floor. “Obviously, you need space.”

“No, that’s not what I meant.”

“Clearly, that’s what you meant.” You walked to the door, opening it while he panicked behind you.

“Y/n-” You whipped around to face him, biting your lip to stop yourself from getting emotional. That could wait until you were entirely out of his sight.

“Reese, I’m leaving.” He started begging behind you, but you blocked it out. You knew if you listened to a word of it, you’d stay. But you also knew that you both needed space to cool down, even if Reese didn’t mean what he said. So you ignored the pleading, no matter how hard it was, and went home.

***

It had been a week since you last spoke to Reese. But it wasn’t for lack of trying. Reese tried talking to you during classes or passing periods, but you ignored him. Even if he had cooled down, you hadn’t. You were still so upset at his outburst.

Reese even tried calling you occasionally, but you’d simply tell him you weren’t ready to talk to him and hang up. You felt a little bad about it, but at the same time, you didn’t care because of how he treated you.

It was now Friday, and you had just gotten home from school. This was your favorite time of day. It was the last day of school for the week, and there were three hours that you got to spend alone in the house. Sometimes more if your parents were working late. Sometimes you spend these special hours with Reese, but obviously, you couldn’t do that today.

You were sitting on the couch eating a snack when you heard the door unlock and open. Immediately, you were confused. Neither of your parents told you that they’d be coming home early. You set your snack on the side table and hesitantly stood up.

“Jesus fuck, Reese! You’re breaking and entering now?” You asked as you saw your boyfriend walk through your house. 

“You’re the one who gave me a key, and I’m only using it as a last resort.” He pocketed said key and walked over to you, but you brushed past him.

“I don’t wanna talk to you, Reese.”

“Then can you at least listen, Y/n?” He asked, following you to your bedroom. Instead of answering, you sat on your bed, giving him a blank stare. Realizing you were finally giving him a chance to hear him out, Reese shut your door and leaned against it. “I’m sorry, okay?”

You rolled your eyes in response, making him frown. 

“Y/n-“

“You know what?” You interrupted, waving a hand to silence him. “No. ‘Sorry’ isn’t gonna fix it, Reese. You called me suffocating when I was trying to help you. Do you know how hurtful that is?”

“You’re right.” The immediate response shocked you. Reese didn’t like proving someone right, even when he knew he was wrong. He pushed off the door, sitting on the bed beside you. He made sure there was still a bit of space between you.

He looked at you nervously, expecting you to tell him to leave, that you never wanted to see him again. Instead, you drummed your fingers on your thighs, giving a slight nod.

“What were you even mad about?” Reese sighed at the question, not wanting to think about it for fear of getting mad again.

“Everything, to be honest. Mom, school. The usual.”

“But you’ve never taken that out on me before.”

“It felt worse than other times.” You nodded again, scooting closer to lay a hand on his back. 

“I’m sorry for pushing.” Reese looked up at you, giving you an incredulous look.

“Why are you sorry? You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“I kept bugging you when you clearly didn’t wanna talk. I just-“

“No, Y/n.” Reese cut you off, grabbing the hand on his shoulder. He trapped it between his two hands, rubbing over the knuckles. “You wanted to help me, and I was being a bitch.” You couldn’t help but laugh, and you saw a twitch of a smile from Reese. “Let me make it up to you.”

“How?” You asked. Reese stared, clearly trying to come up with something to suggest. One of his hands let go of yours, lingering on your thigh.

“I’ll do anything you want, Y/n.” He muttered, eyes darting to your lips for just a second. “Just tell me. I wanna make it right.”

He seemed so genuinely sorry; he just didn’t know how to put it all into words.

“I think we both know, Reese.”

“I need to hear you say it.”

“Touch me.” It was soft, and so were his touches. Reese’s hands dragged up and down on your skin, holding back from manhandling you like he usually would during intimate moments like this, as if he was trying to savor it. His kisses were gentle but needy, starting at your lips but then trailing down to your neck and chest. Your breath hitched as Reese squeezed your hip before trailing his hand up and under your shirt. “Please, Reese.”

“What do you want, baby?” He asked, too focused on trying to cover any exposed skin in licks and bites. You drove your hips upwards into his.

“Show me you’re sorry.” There was soon a blur of clothing, both yours and his, flying around your room until you were completely bare. You waited impatiently for Reese to give you what you craved, but instead, you whined as you watched him slide down the bed, moving further away from where you needed him most. “Reese, what are you- Fuck!” You jolted at the sudden contact of him dragging his tongue through your folds. An arm across your hips kept you pinned to the bed, preventing you from trying to push yourself more onto his face while he devoured you like a starved man.

Desperate for more than what Reese was giving you, which felt like so much, you squeezed your thighs around his head to keep him in place. He could’ve laughed right then and there. He had called you suffocating negatively, as if he wasn’t willing to die like this, smothering himself between your thighs.

Two of his fingers were added into the mix, curling into your g-spot repeatedly. Your back arched as you squirmed around, so close to release.

“You gonna come, baby?” you responded with incoherent babbling and nods, reaching down to tug at Reese’s hair to try to ground yourself. He continued his assault of licks and sucks, harshly and suddenly pushing you over the edge. But that didn’t stop Reese. He cleaned you up, taking everything you gave him and playing with your clit to ride you through your high. When you came down from your peak, you went limp and tried pushing Reese away from your now sensitive cunt.

Reese sat back on the balls of his feet, admiring you and what he had done. His lips and chin were shiny, coated in your arousal. It just made you want him more.

He hovered over you to give you a kiss, making you taste yourself. You surprised Reese by locking your legs around his hips and bringing him closer to you.

“Are you sure?” He asked, looking between you at his cock that was so close yet so far from your pussy, and then up to look at your face. You nodded, tiredly but eagerly. “Gotta hear you say it, Y/n.”

“Yes.” You used all your strength just to mutter it. “Yes, yes, yes.” 

That was all Reese needed. Trying not to move too far away from you, he reached into the bottom drawer of your nightstand and grabbed a condom. Once it was rolled on, Reese used a hand to guide himself into you while the other gripped your hip.

Reese’s head dropped onto your shoulder once he was buried in you. There was a moment of stillness where the two of you just laid there, basking in the quiet and the feeling of fullness.

“I love you so much, Y/n.” Reese was now looking at you, speaking weakly. “You know that, right?” You could’ve cried. He looked unsure of whether or not you did.

“Of course, I know.” You answered just as softly, pecking his lips. “And I love you just as much.”

Reese nodded, trying to ingrain your words in his head so he’d never forget them. Then he started pulling out, stopping when just the tip was in before thrusting.

It was slow and gentle, a stark contrast to how you usually had sex, to how Reese usually did anything. But you loved it. The hand that wasn’t on your hip interlocked with your own.

“Faster, Reese.” You begged. You loved the gentle love he gave you, but you both knew he was holding back. “Please.” He gave into your command and sped up his thrusts. His hand on your hip helped pull you closer to him so he could continuously hit that special sensitive spot inside you. You squirmed and moaned, reaching up for him, and he allowed it, lowering himself until his forehead was against yours. Matching pants and slaps of skin were all you could focus on.

Without having to ask him, Reese reached down to draw tight circles on your clit. He groaned when you squeezed his cock in response.

“Reese, I-“

“It’s okay, baby.” He said, kissing your cheek. “Come for me, Y/n. Please, honey.” 

It felt like you were blacking out, but in the best way. All you felt was Reese and the pleasure as you arched your back. Your pussy squeezed around him so deliciously that he couldn’t help but fall off the edge right after you.

You were a mess of naked, tangled limbs and heavy breathing as you both came down from your climaxes. Reese squeezed your waist, rubbing his hand up and down your side.

“I really am sorry, Y/n.” He mumbled into your chest. You smiled weakly, raking your fingers through his hair.

“I forgive you, Reese.”

[730hcck]

[ @itsyazmin ]

contact: yaz ✨

( sent ): i’n drunk, only god knniws wjere i aum, i htink im either e;thinkgin toi hard or ium having a heat struhjoke andn i known i fucked up

( sent ): i fucjed up the nonent the words left my mourh when you came uo to talk to me in the ljen fir the batgriom nad i mase youi wlak away grom me

( sent ): i fucke f uo the moment i didn’t just ask yiu to the party

( sent ): it was going tk be after my match on wednesday

( sent ): we were jb fhe trainers, rnemeber?

( sent ): i wa sholding ur habd, u were hilding uo an ice oakc ti me

( sent ): but when i nws gonna do it, you alreaydv said someone ekse asked yiu

( sent ): but that’s not reh inly time i fucked up

( sent ): i fucjmed up when j djdn’t kiss you at the mall

( sent ): wheb you grabbed my chin and yurned my head when j was lookjgn at us ib the mirror

( sent ): i shoudka kissed you an dtokd you nkt to go to the psrty with dom

( sent ): and be my date instemmmmed

( sent ): or at the djne r

( sent ): at ass o’clock in the mkrnjng - waking up early eveb though i’m nkt a morning person bc i didn’t wan tt o miss out on breakfast wirh you

( sent ): i shoild a just ignored that loud ass ugky ass bitch ass waitress who was far too happy on a morning

( sent ): or the nghtt at the club

( sent ): i dont remenber what happened after tbra asshole showed uo

( sent ): but j should have kissed you then

( sent ): at any point i shiudn shave kissed you

( sent ): ir that night i chdkdled you

( sent ): when you turne dalrind and i soooned yiu

( sent ): i shoukd gav turned y around and kissed your worries away

( sent ): or maybe that very first not-date. battlebsip

( sent ): i shoukd ahve told you i don’t car e what haooens to ys in the future - whether you’d “ruin” me ot nkt

( sent ): becaus e thatms a risk i’n willing to take if it means i get to know you

( sent ): but we bith didn’t expect that i’d be the one to ruin you, huh?

( sent ): i’ve been wanting to kiss you since that very first night.

( sent ): i think about kissing you all the time.

( sent ): would you have let me kiss you? did you want me to kiss you all those times?

( sent ): i’m sorry i suck at being just friends with you

( sent ): i’m sorry i let my jealousy blind me and treat you like shit today - you’re free to be with whoever you want. i guess seeing dom calling you his date had fucjifn blindsided me kien crazy even thi i alreaydvjnew you were comjng with him

( sent ): coming because of him. becayse be asked you, nkt me. becays e im always nksising the timjngs ont ehse things and now i’ve lost you.

( sent ): imn sorry it toon me so long to accept my own feelings and huritbg yours in the orocess

( sent ): the fucking doubeld stabdsrds are crayz and imm dk sorry evvayse you don’t deserve shit ljen that and i shouldnnt have been jeakous in the first when all i do is think with my dicke

( sent ): i’ll leave u alroen now, i hust saw your posts in the dashb and it’s oretty obvjous you din’t want me aroudn anymore

( sent ): but jf you want tk talk, just look uo at the stars ans talk to them

( sent ): i’m looking up at the stars and telling them all about my favorite person

( sent ): all about you

( sent ): and how much better you deserve that a dude who can’t even recognize his nown feldkngs of jealousy and resorts to ebeing a dickhead

[raleighcarrera]

29. Best Drunken Night vs Worst Drunken Night for Raleigh x MC perhaps? 🥺

best vs. worst prompts / 29. best drunken night vs. worst drunken night

the worst time 

“oh my god.” her voice is hushed -- awed, really, as she glances around the space they’ve closed themselves in with eyes so wide they feel likely to bug out of her head at any moment. “this is -- we’re in -- is this ariana spielman’s closet?”

cadence’s head whips around just in time to catch the disinterested, almost bored shrug of raleigh’s shoulders. “guess so.”

the door he’s leaning against is vibrating with the bass from the music blasting from downstairs. one of the silver buttons on raleigh’s jacket clanks against the wood loudly. 

“she has, like -- seventy birkin bags,” she breathes, slowly shaking her head as she takes in the expansive wall of purses to her right. “i can’t believe i’m in here. i can’t believe we’re even in her house.”

“i hate los angeles,” raleigh mumbles, pushing off from the wall and strolling over to her, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind. “this party sucks.”

admittedly, the party did sort of suck, but they’d had enough free drinks and free food to make the evening tolerable, even if the crowd at ariana’s house was mostly made up of the sort of c-list celebrities who were desperate to document everything on social media and tried to shove their cellphones in raleigh’s face every time he started mixing a drink.

it was never like this, at home in new york. most of their friends were cool and normal and while their parties were always the sort of events that kept them up until dawn they’d tended to be more low-key, lately, minimizing the amount of attention they got during what was supposed to be their down time.

out in LA everyone was looking for their fifteen minutes. so drinking downstairs with the rest of the crowd wasn’t just hanging out like it was in new york; it was a performance in and of itself. people were watching them, their thumbs already poised over a blank tweet.

she didn’t blame raleigh for disliking it. she disliked it, too. that was why she’d suggested finding some place they could be alone and let him drag her up here -- into ariana spielman’s beautiful, enormous closet.

cadence squeezes her hands affectionately on raleigh’s arms where they’re looped around her. “we can’t hook up in here.”

the sigh he expels into her ear is loud and exasperated. “why not?”

cadence lifts a hand to point up at the ceiling. “she has cameras.”

the pointed silence from behind her leads her to believe that raleigh doesn’t take issue with that as much as she does. “raleigh.”

“okay, okay. i’ll save it for the hotel. just -- i need a few minutes before we go back down there.”

she spins in his arms to look at his face. raleigh looks tired, in the awful in-between of drunk but not drunk enough. her expression softens.

ever-so-delicately, she leans in and presses her lips to the tip of his nose. raleigh sighs, tightening his grip on her. 

“you know,” cadence murmurs, “there was probably once a time where i wouldn’t have been able to drag you out of there even if i did want to have sex in ariana spielman’s closet.”

raleigh rolls his eyes. “untrue,” he argues, “i’d leave any party, anywhere, any time... for even five minutes alone with you.” there’s a beat where she tries to stifle her smile and he rolls his shoulders, pursing his lips before continuing, “but i know what you mean. i guess i just -- don’t see the appeal in playing along with all this fake shit.” his eyes focus on her face slowly, some of the cloud brought on by all the tequila they’d had downstairs lifting. “not anymore.”

she bounces up onto her tip-toes to kiss him, swallowing the drunk giggles that are threatening. if they weren’t going to commit, they probably should have drank a little bit less -- she’s wobbly and unsteady on her feet in a way that’s going to make their flight home tomorrow miserable, but not drunk enough to actually be having any fun at this party that is, admittedly, incredibly fucking lame.

raleigh’s hands squeeze her hips one last time before he pulls away. “we should probably go be seen for a little while longer, huh?”

her mouth twists sympathetically. “yeah. but we can leave in an hour.”

“here’s hoping.”

they shuffle back to the closed door together, though when raleigh reaches out for the handle it doesn’t budge, holding firmly in place. he frowns, jiggling the knob.

“what’s wrong?” she asks, blinking slowly, her brain struggling to process what’s happening.

raleigh’s frown deepens into a scowl. “i think it’s locked.”

“from the outside? no.” pushing his hand away, she tries the door, too, eyes widening when it holds resolutely still. “oh my god.”

“you’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” he says, stepping away with a groan. “can we call someone?”

“i don’t have her number. do you?”

she squeezes his shoulder as he pulls out his phone, mumbling to himself. her head is still swimming, but even she can understand that lately it feels like neither of them can quite catch a break -- there’s always something.

and she definitely had higher hopes for their weekend in LA, and even tonight. she’d expected this party to be a chance to get away from it all and let loose, not be some place where they had to constantly keep looking over their shoulders for cameras.

“maybe it’s a sign we should just stay up here,” she suggests, nuzzling her face into raleigh’s jacket. 

the hum he gives in response is equal parts interested and annoyed. “don’t tempt me.”

the best time

they’re definitely past capacity on their penthouse.

everywhere she looks there’s wall-to-wall people dancing and drinking, laughing and shouting. the floor beneath her feet feels like it’s shaking from how loud the music is.

raleigh’s standing on the countertop in their kitchen. his eyes light up when he sees her.

raising his voice to be heard above all the excitement, he screams, “cadence! come up here!”

the crowd parts to clear a path for her, cheering as she makes her way over. climbing up onto the counter in her miniskirt is far from the most graceful thing she’s ever done, especially after the bottle of wine she’d had at dinner and the four or five or forty-five martinis raleigh had poured her, but she manages, and soon she’s squeezed into the space beside their cabinets with her boyfriend and he’s got one strong arm slung warmly across her shoulders while the other lifts the bottle of dom in his left hand high enough that the top smacks into their kitchen ceiling.

“a toast!” raleigh declares, to the delight of the crowd below them. she tilts her head to grin at him and laughs loudly when raleigh glances at her out of the corners of his eyes and then grins back, wide and goofy like the both of them are in on the same private joke. “to the beautiful, phenomenal, exceptional, fantastic, talented --”

“jesus christ, raleigh.”

“ -- brilliant,” he continues, even more loudly, “can i get a drum roll please? thank you, visionary, otherworldly, and of course, devastatingly sexy vinyl award winning cadence dorian!”

he doesn’t give her a chance to bury her face in her hands like she so badly wants to. as soon as people start to cheer, he leans down and presses his lips forcefully against hers, smacking a loud, almost aggressive kiss onto her lips. 

then he shoves the bottle of champagne in her face and forces her to tilt her head back to accept the drink he’s quite literally pouring down her throat, her laughter giving way to coughs that make him laugh, too, the broad palm he’d had settled on her shoulder slowly making its way down her back to rest on the curve of her ass.

“to cadence!” roars someone again from the floor, and as everyone pounds their feet harder, she looks back to raleigh, flushed and grinning while he drains what’s left in the bottle and immediately switches it out for another. 

“speech!” raleigh crows into her ear, “speech, speech, speech --”

“oh my god, thank you everyone!” her palm claps over his mouth and doesn’t move even when his tongue licks across her hand slowly, back and forth and back again. “it means so much to celebrate with all of you tonight. thanks so much for coming and for all your support and -- remember that anything that happens here tonight was all raleigh’s fault, okay?”

the volume on the music increases as the crowd turns their attention back to dancing. raleigh slips both his arms around her waist from behind and presses up against her, somehow managing to stay on-beat with the swing of his hips despite the fact that he’s so drunk he can barely stand. she laughs as she rocks back against him, then laughs louder when he groans lowly into her ear.

“don’t think that you can get away with murder just ‘cause this party is for you, okay?” 

the words are said so quietly she almost misses them, each consonant soft and slurred. “i don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“yeah, right,” raleigh counters, the sharp bark of his laugh punctuated by the way he presses forward firmly, the hard line of his body shiver-inducing even through the layers of fabric between them. “you think i’m just gonna let you get away with that? i’m --”

“you should at least get down, if you’re going to do that.” cadence blinks, glancing down to see zadie screaming up at the both of them. “we don’t all need to see you dry hump each other.”

raleigh’s arms tighten around her before she can even think about moving, though her face feels hot beyond just what the alcohol should’ve done to her. “hey,” he calls back, “it’s her party.”

she wiggles down to her knees, plucking the mostly full bottle of dom from raleigh’s hand and holding it out to zadie with her eyebrows arched. “call it even?”

“totally,” she agrees, taking the bottle from cadence and departing back into the living room with barely a wave over her shoulder. 

cadence moves the rest of the way down and slides to the edge, letting her legs dangle off the counter. within moments raleigh is beside her, gangly limbs tangled around her again near-immediately. “are you having fun?”

“best time of my life,” she answers honestly, though that was how parties with raleigh always felt -- like he was in constant competition with himself to outdo their last evening out together. “thanks for making this so special for me.”

“i’d do anything for you.” his voice is suddenly oddly serious, out of sorts with the playful mood he’s been in. she blinks at him, then laughs when he shatters the stillness as quickly as it’d come by ducking back in to steal another kiss. 

raleigh jumps off the counter abruptly, before she can deepen the kiss to something more extreme, and hooks her legs around his waist from behind. “c’mon, popstar,” he directs, before she can question what he’s doing, and as if on autopilot, her body swings onto his back so he can carry her, her hands finding his hair and her lips spreading into a delighted smile. “let’s go get you the kudos you deserve, eh?”

[catcherkazuya]

😤⚾ daiya no ace, episode 18 liveblogging ⚾😤

- kuramochi came to get his manss lol

- ugh their relationship 💖 im in love w them - also we're not gonna skip over the fact that kuramochi has always been the most perceptive to other team members' wellbeing , including their physical and emotional health - he was the one who knew miyuki was injured, he was the one who knew sawamura was going through the yips before anyone else.. like, mochi is on it - and he knows all the little idiosyncrasies about miyuki like the difference when he's practicing for the sake of practice or actually using practice as a way to escape and thinking about stuff - mochi knows all 👁️ - also they so cute w miyuki's constant teasing and mochi's loud mouthed responses,, their personalities mesh so well together - lmao this was alot of analysis from the first 30 secs bc w/e 🤷🏾‍♀️ - WHAT THE FUCK ARE FIGHTING FOR 

- who lost ?? they are so dumb - lmao nabe cut that shit off so quick tho 😂 he was like "now now children" - YES KATAOKA CHANGE 👏🏾 THAT 👏🏾 FUCKING 👏🏾 ROSTER 👏🏾 - YALL KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS - NON-MANGA READERS, IVE BEEN HINTING THIS SHIT FOREVER - ITS HAPPENING - okay miyuki 👀 saying some captain-ly shit like that 

- lmao maezono always the hype man - oh shit this is when Miyuki starts talking about pitch calling and sequences and a bunch of other mess that I don't understand 😂 - usually I'm with it but I can't with this pitching theory my baby sounds so smart tho,, but imm let you handle that lol - OH MY FUCKING GOD CHRISSSS 💖💞💗💖💞💝💓💞💕

- I JUST LOST OXYGEN - I haven't seen him in 2 seasons I HAVEN'T HEARD HIS VOICE IN 2 SEASONS - 😱😱😭 I'm in love with him so much pls don't tell miyuki - oh the flashbacks to the third years I cry - oh okumura - he's backhanding compliments are an absolute gift - lmao sawamura was so willing to make a truce between them and okumura was like "no I'll pass ✋" - omg that image okumura has of miyuki in his mind is so devious I love it 

- also he's such a sad boi™ with your little middle school flashback - why don't any of these baseball boys know how to deal with their emotional baggage ?? like he is so fucking hurt and traumatized that his old coach left him that this boy doesn't even know what it's like to enjoy baseball without vengeance or anger behind it - fuck man get a therapist - WHAT what are these dreamy flashbacks okumura keeps having of miyuki like PICK A SIDE do you hate him or love him ?? 😂 - either way, CHARACTER GROWTH 😤😤

this week’s end card (ft. our precious first years) ♦

[modern-oedipus]

Rant I think

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I have to keep remind myself that even though the person I love the most in the world is suffering and is not likely to stop suffering for the rest of his life, it is not entirely my fault and me blaming and punishing myself or thinking about just destroying myself won’t bring them further happiness and I must not take my own happiness away by my own hands... or should I?

I always feel guilty enjoying my life when my dad’s so stressed, but I can’t ever change him to open up no matter what I do; and he always works hard & says I should just enjoy myself and live my life & provides me with all good for that, but then whenever I see him being so upset— for years— and whenever I just... I don’t know. I literally went suicidal because of guilt of existing and being a burden back then, even though he explictly states that it’s his own choice to have kids, that he loves me, that he’s proud of me, that I mean the world to him, etc, and he proved his words thousands of times, but-

But he doesn’t seem to understand I care about him as much as he cares about me.

And I feel so guilty living my life and being happy when he is not.

But I can’t make him happy ornsolve his problems— those are real adult stuff that’s beyond my power.

But when I live my life and enjoy it I feel like I’m being ignorant and I feel so guilty.

When I punish myself for that— emotionally and literally, I end up depressed and not good. And that’s dangerous. Depression is so dangerous especially in such a young age that I am in, so god forbid that-

I don’t know what to do, honestly. I feel so guilty enjoying myself and I feel downright shitty if I don’t enjoy myself. Nothing solves the problem.

The regret and fear is always eating me alive.

Even though there is nothing I can do.

It hs been like this from as long as I can remember my life.

I just want him to be happy, well-rested, and at peace. He wants same for me.

We never get both in once. Bwcause he’s always the one who gives. Always so self sacrificing. I used to think my dad is absolutely perfect but I think that’s very damgerous to give too muxh of yourself even if it’s... family. I’m... grateful of course... how can I not... but then I feel like a parazyte or something....... and I wouldn’t exchange his well being for anything else......... and yet.... I.... uh... my head’s gonna burst. I am just typing because I pushed this thought away so many times in these last days and if I pushed it away again it’d lead a really bad breakdown. I need to avoid that so I need to speak. Not to anyone particularly. Maybe I should seek a therapist. But still. Only place I can apply due outside conditions would he that in myncollege and I don’t think there’s place there. But still. I can’t afford another depression in the years that should be the most fun so I’ll have to keep my mental heath in check no matter what. So I guess it’s better to just write it out— maybe not scientifically most suggested or verified theory but I can’t expect things to be perfect to start working on them.

So yeah.

Basically.

I am so full of love and life and joy nowadays.

But I also feel so undeserving for all or them.

Sometimes I feel smart and beautiful and productive and loved. Mostly.

Then I feel guilty for itntoo, even though I worked so hard for all of them— I worked so hard to understand all scientific shit, not only textbook wise but actual effort to adapt to scientific thinking. I worked hard in gym to get the body I want and I paid attention to my appearance and manners and culture, yet I still feel undeservjngn of beauty aometimes. I overcame social anxiety years ago and every friendship & communication I make successfully are big amazing achievements that may come naturally to extroverts but to me they took hard work. Sometimes, mostly, I’m like, “Wow Nila, well done! Amazing!” Then other times I’m like “Do you even?? Deserve your food?? Or your life??????? Do you even?? Deserve a warm bed when there are homeless people?? Do you even??? Deserve all these friends????? When you’re just?? You??? Do you even deserve enjoying your life when your parents are being quite exhausted and upset to provide for your spoiled rich kid life????” and...... like... this got me in serious depression before which onlynupsetted them further and they couldnt understand what was wrong woth me because they “gave me all”, emotionally and financially. They just couldnt ser that I felt like a parayste that’s sucking life out of them, as if Imm killing them by my own hands, andnidk.

Maybe I’m being too dramatic. Maybe that’s not the case. My parents strictly say they’re proud, that zi’m loved, that itms theirnown decision and not mine, etc., etc. I have no dark past, a clean family with no sad stuff or abuse or anything, and honestly, I don’y know.

I just want to see them happy and at peace too. Thst’s only way I can feel content. But I can’t change them. I can’t control a big majority of the spendings I have. I don’t know shat to fo. Thjs has been a problem for so many years. Itms not sth that appeared yesterday. Sometimes I can ignore. But then the feeling comes back like a ghost. That I’m undeserving. That I must be ashamed for enjoying myself.

I want to tell that it’s a lie, that it’s just a depressed thought and as a scientist I can’t trust a brain in clinical depression cause that’s chemical imbalance. That’s literally what keeps me sane, knowing that depression is a medical condition and any depression triggering thoughts are NOT REAL snd they’re just some medical imbalance of hormones and transmitters so I am just fine.

I’m not depressed, not really, I still feel excited and hupe and happy today. But this thought lingers. I couldn’tbhave afforded to push this thought away for the fifth time in last two days otherwise it’d break me. So I’f rather write it.

I keep telling myself that I am truly deserving to live and enjoy live.

I seriously had to rmeind myself two days ago like “just because you got a bad grade does not validate you starving yourself, you are deserving to eat rven when you are not doing well” tben I did buy myself my healthy food and ate it but...

Can I even... prove that I’m worth it??

Scientificaly??

I know for a fact rhat me trying is a good reason. Me working hard is a good reason. But not an enough reason. I need to be productive. I need to make myself happy. I need to make people I love happy. I neef to bring smiles to faces people I love— I need to get accepted to that project so I can perform researches when I’m off school so I can design drugs and save people so that my life and existence can be allowed and appreciated. I need to write fanfics and news and produce creative content to let my heart out and share joy with friends so we feel happy and alive and connected so it has a meaning. I need to save street animals so I actually have a meaning living my life.

Am I really deserving????

I am, I say myself, but then a voice whispers, but... are you sure?

I again say yes, I’m sure.

So far, I’m surs.

A little hesitant, but tjat must be some invalid creeping thoughtrather than a feality. Sveryone is deservijg of a happy joyful life so why not me??? I’d never say someone is undeserving of happiness unless that someone had an inexcusable crime like murder or something; and since that doesnt really happen in real life i’d sAy yes we all are deserving but...

I dkn’t know.

Maybe I should talk to someoen instead of mindlessly typing.

A therapist sounds nice but not too affordable. I’ll still try on Monday— wait no I hVe a midterm. Tuesday. I’ll try. If it’s not abailable maybe I can try some online therapy which is more convenient. I don’t know. Imm still feeling alive an happy and not detachef which is good but I don’t want this feeling to lead anywhere bigger, if it makes sensez

I just keep reminding myself that I am worth safety and love and joy as much as everyone else is

[mcuspidey-archive]

@thelazypangolin-deactivated2019 i miss you so sO Much and idk if you’ll see this and i don’t wanna mention your other blog (idk if you want anyone else to know but also don’t know if you’ve been on there either),, AMY I MISS YOU !

it’s been. a few days that i haven’t said anything because it doesn’t really seem real? the day you deleted was the only day we HAVEN’T talked in months and it felt so weird and awful and I know what happened.. I feel terrible for not replying sooner, i keep thinking that if i had replied and been there. maybe you’d still be here and i just. i’m so sorry!

i know how hard things have been for you lately! but you are so incredibly strong. the strongest person i know and you deserve all the happiness and love in the entire world. i hope more than anything that you start believing that. but also that you aren’t alone! i love you so fucking mucH and i know that your followers/mutuals do too. we love and miss you and imm gonna start rambling here because i really am just not okay but listen!!!!!

take a break. take all the time you need. even if it’s for good. if you never come back on this site again, it’s okay! YOU ARE SO IMPORTANT, and taking care of yourself is the most important thing and i hope that you are. god i need to stop

before i rEally start crying but. i miss you;( i really really do and i want you to know that you mean everything to me. you’re my best friend and i can’t thank you enough for everything you’ve done for me. for always being there and just. being you.

just know,, i larb you💖

[uniformbravo]

my big long analytical-type text posts arent even good tbh like i kno this sounds rly self deprecatey but i dont mean it that way, it’s just literally every time i write one of those i have no idea what im talking abt & when i go back & reread them months later imm like “fuc what the fuck is this” bc its so Bad & my opinions/perspective changed since then ahhh like i thought u could only get embarrassed abt old art or fics but boy some of the dum shit ive written on this site & tried to pass off as meta oof!!!!! 

& thats probably part of the reason i dont finish my stuff now bc its like.,, im aware of the problem now & i know these posts arent watertight & later im gonna be like ‘’fuck what was i even tlakign about this is wrong” ??? i was workin on some hitball arc analysis a while back & i havent finished it yet bc im already thinking of other things that weaken my argument & it’s too big a project to try & rework stuff at this point like Damn im not a scholar im not some kind of pnat research student writing my dissertation on max’s character development it doesn’t have to be perfect but at the same time i don’t want to purposely ignore certain things to make my point look more Legit or whatever hgnfkdjgkgnf like. it’s a project i care abt but im a perfectionist & im afraid of criticism (even if it’s just imaginary crit that im projecting onto a hypothetical audience, it still stresses me) so i feel like i can’t do the project the justice it deserves bc it’s just such a huge energy suck after a certain point it’s almost not worth continuing with it u know

but then if i never finish the project i never get my thoughts out there regardless of whether they’re “right” or not so it’s just??? & then i spend 10 thousand years not doing it bc im paralyzed by all of the above so the posts get buried in my drafts bc im Outta Control so rn im like, sitting in this leaky boat bucketing out water but also im the one putting water in the boat in the first place bc the water is posts in my drafts & i keep adding more instead of working on the posts i need to finish it’s!!!! really a whole big thing!!!! gotta go back & save some of those drafts at this point rip... (did u know that if ur working on a post & u save it to ur drafts and then open it to edit again u can bookmark that page on ur browser & then u can access the post thru that bookmark!! i mean i’ve only tried it in chrome so whatever but that’s how i saved all my other buried drafts loooool im such a mess)

anyway sorry im in. this kinda rambly mood tonight, if i sound upset im not, im actually feeling totally fine abt all this like im not legit upset or anything so dont worry??? i just like to dump my thoughts sometimes it’s all good!! anyway i m gonna go in my drafts & find the posts im working on so i dont lose them,,, god

[thegeminisage]

Jace, Magnus, Raph :D

THATS SO MANY THANK U

JACE:

favorite thing about them: everyone likes to sort of categorize jace as this mostly douchey guy but he’s actually kind of Softe if you dig a little and like not to be basic but i like that about him

least favorite thing about them: WHY YOU ALWAYS LYIIIN

favorite line: “dazzle me” @cathy not one word

brOTP: JACE AND ALEC…give me more of that good parabatai shit…….my other favorite thing about jace is it’s implied he knew alec was in love with him for a long timeor at the very LEAST since alec’s bad reaction in 1.04 and he played dumb (partially because he hates talking about feelings yes but also) for alec’s benefit. just not to make things weird. it would have been easy to make him be weird about it. straight guys are assholes. but he wasnt and thats real nice.

OTP: he’d be miserable without clary to the point where he still wanted to smash even when he thought they were related, so

nOTP: jace and alec. STRICTLY platonic on jace’s end! it’s not necessarily that i think it’s ~problematic~ god knows you couldnt pay me to touch that discourse i just think the dynamic is much richer and deeper when it’s a one-sided romance and jace was still cool about it. idk i find that totally refreshing and fascinating and like a pretty new take, at least to me personally. why ruin it by turning it into run-of-the-mill slash? (i say this as someone who writes a lot of run-of-the-mill slash, don’t send me mean messages) 

random headcanon: he likes [REDACTED], which technically was cathy’s headcanon first

unpopular opinion: he’s never done anything wrong in his life ever…look i know he has but like leave him alone?? idek why i feel so strongly about this he isn’t my favorite character i don’t stan him i’m not super invested in him…i just don’t think he’s done anything wrong, aside from the fact that he lies a lot. i was totally siding with him over alec during their season 1 tiffs.

song i associate with them: natalia kills - kill my boyfriend :)

favorite picture of them: sorry but i dont really have one

MAGNUS:

favorite thing about them: his body language! he’s like always on the go, all his lil flourishes, how expressive he is–expression-wise and with his body language. he uses his hands to talk and since warlocks use their hands for magic that’s like an awesome character detail. my second favorite thing is how fucking cool he is. i love when he does magic. he’s so cool oh my god he’s like the HEIGHT of cool

least favorite thing about them: not to be problematic but he’s a little TOO perfect. let him fuck up once in awhile! so far all we’ve gotten was the seelie queen thing and that was half alec’s fault

favorite line: “i’m the high warlock of brooklyn” YOU TELL EM MAGNUS

brOTP: MAGNUS AND RAPHAEL IS CANONICAL ACE/BI SOLIDARITY AND I’M SO HERE FOR IT

OTP: well obviously magnus and alec

nOTP: i dont really?? see him shipped with anyone else??? i guess my notp is imm*rtal h*bands…alec would absolutely hate being immortal, whether by magic or being turned. he would HATE it. i have a series of fanfictions outlines to explain my feelings on this matter more thoroughly someday

random headcanon: i made a gifset about it on my other blog (you can see it at /post/172404479554/ if you know the url) but i think maybe he doesn’t always like being a warlock. like, the magic is great! he loves his people! he loves being able to do cool stuff! but his parents basically died because of it (trying not to be too spoilery, sorry coralie), and being immortal when you have to watch people die is hard. he’s pretty sensitive about his cat eyes, maybe in a way that’s more worried about what other people will think than someone who dislikes himself? i feel like maybe he used to dislike himself a lot more intensely and sort of had a long time to unlearn it and now most of the time it’s fine but he just still has his bad days and tender spots. i feel strongly anough this, clearly

unpopular opinion: again im gonna have to go with being anti imm*rtal h*bands…i mean obviously people can write what they want & no skin off my nose but i wish it wasnt QUITE so popular bc its hard to find fic i like w/o it

song i associate with them: man i have a really great one for alec like that could kinda be malec but not a magnus-only one sorry

favorite picture of them: literally any picture with cat eyes i love his cat eyes so much

RAPHAEL:

favorite thing about them: CANONICAL ASEXUAL!!!!!! i can’t tell you how much that means to me. it’s a first for me! i watched this whole show for raphael. second favorite thing: he’s still religious. that’s real brave imo

least favorite thing about them: WHY DID HE DO THAT…i cant say what he did on coralie’s post i already said a magnus spoiler but i cant believe he DID THAT im heartbroken for him and so angry at him what an idiot why didn’t he ask for help

favorite line: number one winner is the entire scene about the stars with rosa but close runner up is whenever he speaks spanish. not because it’s sexy or whatever but because he almost exclusively does it when he’s trying to be intimidating. literally i have a gif of him going “adios >:)” when he’s about to commit murder

brOTP: if i had an entire show about magnus and raphael i would be happy. alec who? but raphael and rosa kills me too

OTP: raphael and izzy, come on, come on, show, i’m begging you! simon who? this is where it’s at! i can’t believe she talked about his asexuality like it was a perk rather than a hurdle. i get weepy when i think about it for too long

nOTP: please for the love of god stop shipping with him with simon

random headcanon: dislikes kissing. i may be projecting a bit here ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ at least i finally have a character i can project on!

unpopular opinion: rizzy isn’t predatory on either side they both did that and they both owned up to it and got better stop trying to paint one of them like a creeper and the other like some precious innocent victim

song i associate with them: every single song i put on the ace playlist i made the other night

favorite picture of them: i made a gifset of him with the ace colors and that’s my favorite one. it’s at /post/172511018559/ on my other blog if you know the url

(send me characters!!)

[geek-gem]

Sonic Forces First Impressions

11:17 am just saying went to the submit thing twice but decided to click text the third time I went to it.

So I have finally played some Sonic Forces after months of waiting. Including I'm gonna say this. I can't play stage 15 or this secret mission 1 because the game is still installing. Even the first part of episode Shadow. It said the game has 55 more hours honestly over time it will get better hopefully I don't wanna doubt oh my head.

I'm gonna say I'm gonna post spoilers in this. Including I have a set of pictures mainly of the custom character. Including liked a ask about well fan indie thing taking over modern Sonic.

After playing for some hours but not long.

Now my opinions I honestly like it. I think it's very good. Just my head including I didn't wanna start off saying I honestly like it.

Yet really it's nice to play.

I'm gonna mainly say some good stuff.

First I wanna say the visuals are possibly some of the best in the franchise next to possibly Sonic Unleashed. Honestly I don't know which one is better. Mainly I wanna say that first because you really see it with this.

Now with gameplay. I'll talk about modern Sonic first.

I do like it. Yet honestly I've been thinking. This is mainly my opinion and I remember seeing this in the first gameplay video. But I don't like the idea that you have to get wisps instead of rings to boost. Unleashed started that first, Colors used wisps and Generations I think brought rings back. I feel it kind of holds me back.

Including the way the game is also I'm gonna mention this. Their are only two modes normal and hard. I'm surprised theirs only two modes. Yet in a way normal is basically the easier route also I'm playing the game on that difficulty. But I find it kind of stupid it doesn't record the time. You have to play on hard mode to do times. I'm guessing just they want you to play like that. I even question at times should I change the difficultly. Also maybe because they want to challenge you or I thought aware and some shit.

But back to gameplay. It's nice yet compared to Sonic Unleashed and Generations and I haven't played Colors in years and never played Lost World. The game feels a bit slow.

Yet it plays well. But also could be I have it on normal mode. It's the way it's set up where you get go to the extreme and even having to be careful when trying to spin dash well home attack enemies.

Including I'm gonna mention theirs no lives instead you can keep trying it doesn't matter how many times almost left lives but doesn't matter how many times you die. You still play the stage. In a way that's a nice thing. I died the most as modern Sonic on Egg Gate and Mystic Jungle seriously just....meh I think I like Sonic Unleashed a lot okay.

Now let's talk about Classic Sonic who comes up later in the story. It's kind of the same with updated visuals. Yet think theirs some new jump forgot what it is. But the gameplay is enjoyable. Including for anyone who likes the classic gameplay. Remember I didn't die as Classic Sonic on the boss with Eggman in his Egg Dragoon.

Yet honestly okay remember this. You need to be careful when getting close to enemies. Ether I thought I was pretty nice at classic stages a bit or whatever. Just be careful when getting close and using your jump and spin dash.

Yet despite that it still works well.

Honestly didn't die much as Classic Sonic yet Modern Sonic I seem to have that move fast while being awesome shit. No wonder I kept dying in Mystic Jungle even a part twice I think forgot where I had to just not jump and wait for the ramps.

Now the custom character something I've despise since the day it was announced.

It's honestly nice. Yet like I've said I'm just trying to play as the character we've been seeing the first time Buddy The Wolf and let me say this. I started over the game once to make sure if I didn't miss any gear and stuff. Turns out had to play without gear at first.

Including after completing stages and missions I'll talk about that later. You can unlock more gear for your character which is cool. Which is something makes playing levels worth it.

Honestly the custom character is okay. Yet even during that said in my head I still despise it. But honestly it's nice if your a big fan of customization. Yet it's honestly not for me.

Including I looked at my laptop first at the announcement trailer for the character and Google images but decided to look at my laptop to get a closer look. Seriously I tried to make it as the character from the cgi trailers and what we've seen. Because I just don't want to make my own version.

Luckily you can make your own character still while on this world map. Meaning you won't be stuck with the same get up the entire game.

Okay I chose this 2nd voice because I thought bit fit okay. I just really didn't wanna put any creativity alright.

Okay I should talk about the story. I wanna talk about other stuff. Yet I'll get to that later.

The story basically starts off with Eggman talking about so long Sonic has beaten him and he's found a way to beat Sonic.

Honestly the stages are short for some. Yet I did thought when writing that they are in the same place or whatever. So your not replaying levels.

Sonic is gonna save the day first saving Tails and civilians first. When all of a sudden Shadow stops Sonic from harming Eggman and Zavok, Metal Sonic, and Chaos in order. Honestly had a smile on my face hearing Sonic say Chaos's name again. Then we have Infinite appears yet because Infinite is too powerful and the help of these other villains.

They basically kick Sonic's ass before Sonic's eyes close when seeing Infinite's feet.

After that Eggman takes control most of the world because Sonic is gone. But what the game says a rag tag band of resistance members try to fight him off.

With people losing hope because Sonic is not around with characters doubting and hoping for a miracle. A character which is the custom character by the name of Rookie has joined the other characters to stop Eggman.

Really the custom character gameplay is nice and makes it different a bit compared to Sonic. Since it mainly plays like that without no boost.

Including during the story Classic Sonic appears out of nowhere to save Tails from Chaos. Along with Tails trying to fix Omega or something. Including before hand their were talks of Tails losing it without Sonic. Now happy to at least see another Sonic.

Also the other characters Sonic is still alive captive aboard a new Death Egg and Eggman kept him alive to have him see his finished empire. Then he would banish Sonic into space.

Including a boss I didn't die from yet difficult Zavok was pretty nice. Yet turns out that spoiler was true. Is that Zavok isn't real.....

Honestly before I was gonna write about Zavok I'm just thinking of Chaos and when I wrote a post talking about I want Tikal to return to try to relax Chaos..... really I'm fearing it might be the same thing for Chaos. Including I think over the course of the game just or that part how I feel it seems lazy for the developers to not even just I'm disappointed.

Yet honestly the Deadly Six hate Eggman but having to reason with them would be difficult. But it's idea that would make Eggman's empire more terrifying. Instead of this simple boss it's just lazy or some shit some what sorry wanna say not meh okay not sorry.

Oh wait I remember that comic with Chaos from IDW my God it is Chaos those comics better be damn canon. Seriously God damn I want at least Tikal in there. I can pass with Zavok but still.

Including the characters meet up later. I'm also gonna say really the game seems to have a problem with saying dead. Or the idea that Sonic could be dead. Honestly it seems to be quite hard for them. But I feel okay yeah even thought the developers are honestly panzies however that's spelt. Because seriously it's just the word dead. They can't even fucking said they when Lost World did exactly that saying stuff that was honestly dark. Yet the way the characters are it could make sense. I'm sorry or just was bothered. They don't even have to balls to say dead just some what sorry.

Also for the custom character I should just call him Buddy like those leaks months ago said do they still call the character that in this game I haven't heard it no head I need the name not sweet. Theirs this storyline or just a subplot along with Classic Sonic appearing.

Is that Infinite has met Buddy and basically let him live. Telling him he should just stop and be in fear. So from what I'm seeing theirs this subplot of Buddy trying to stand up against Infinite and basically just.... honestly that cutscene stuck with me. Basically this subplot of Buddy trying to brave and stand up to these larger then life threats. I'm guessing that is the arc yet I haven't played more of the game because it's still installing.

Now let's talk about well I should mention the tag team shit. It's basically both the custom character well Buddy and Sonic into one stage. It's don't lie just my head.... really I played it once I guess nice. Really I feel I should play it more after this.

Now to talk about something I wanted to talk about the missions. Also this is sounding like a review but it's not. I'm just being detailed about my first impressions that's all.

The missions is something nice. They give you tasks honestly simple as I've played it for the time being. Such as do a homing attack or slide as Sonic. Or use the astroid or lighting weapon as Buddy which I see doing these missions unlock more gear. Which gives me a reason to try them out. Basically making the experience different then the last sometimes.

Yet it's honestly nice and it's not that detailed as I've played it. But it gave me something to do while waiting for more of the game to install.

We also have these sos missions. Including the first time I saw you play as other people's custom characters. The green one shows you but as soon as I tried the red one on the Death Egg. I immediately paused the game and pressed give up seeing it wasn't mine.....

I really don't wanna play other people's character okay that's all.

Will say some other positive stuff yet I wanna talk about Infinite.

A character I honestly liked before the game was even released. I like him he's honestly cool. Also his song is still beautiful and just amazing to hear before the first boss fight against him. I didn't even die in the first boss against him.

His voice is great and he's a threat. Honestly very cool and something I wanted. Not like my extreme meme versions where he's the ultimate douchebag in history or this Darkseid/Thanos villain where he's just basically the devil. Basically stuff I thought about him.

Seriously the visuals are beautiful even when he appears it's lovely. Took off s behind villain but seriously he's super cool and kind of what I wanted from him. I'm just hoping during the game he gets better.

Including I wanna talk about this too. The voice acting is great said sucks in my head or just no or suck. Sorry just my random negative mind it was an emotional rollercoaster to get to this game why bother.

But honestly the voice acting is very nice. Despite some lines just... really from what I've heard that the characters don't take the situation as seriously. Yet at times they seem too. But it's not as extreme considering it's a E10 game but it's mainly Sonic at times. Despite I like his jokey nature to keep the stuff less stressful.

Really I shouldn't of thought this game being so stressful. Just that theme of Infinite's is beautiful and was expecting more of an end of the world situation where everyone seems to be out of control at times or some shit. Maybe not much.

Including the music is lovely even for the stages. Honestly just I never cared for Fist Bump yet I've been thinking about it and hearing exuse me burp in mouth. But hearing it in the tag team stage. Also it's the invincibility music for Classic Sonic it sounds nice. It's honestly my preference of metal music which is why I love Infinite's theme so much.

Also about the voice acting while I don't like Kirk Thornton as Shadow. Seems like he's gotten better. Even what I've seem with Lego Dimensions. Yet not as iconic or just good as David Humphrey and Jason Griffin. Really again all the voice acting is good. Even Roger Craig Smith as Sonic honestly. While quite a lot of the lines aren't the meaningful. It's still very nice to hear the voices.

Really I feel that's all of my first impressions. I'm gonna post a photo set after this. Overall good first impressions I honestly left my PS4 on to install the rest of the content

Got tags done honestly and retyped honestly oh God ticks and even typos. Just sorry yet again honestly good first impressions oh head seriously typos just I'm being weird. Again good first impressions 12:20 pm

[rosevined-blog]

can u do my url i need 2 smile i love you

( & ) @kissingdeaths !

( & ) meme : accepting !

Do I Follow Them? : YESYESYESYES A MILLION INFINITY YESES TBH ?? ITS HANNAH THIS IS HANNAH THIS IS THE ACTUAL LOML OKAY LIKE ??? IS THIS EVEN A QUESTION ??? HONESTLY MY HEART BEATS FOR HANNAH DON’T TOUCH ME DON’T EVEN LOOK AT ME ??

Why Did I Follow Them? : THE FIRST TIME I FOLLOWED HANNAH WAS ON MY ROSE ACCOUNT & THAT WAS ?? SO LONG AGO BUT ?? i followed her on hyeon’s blog & i was really like . i was hardcore tumblr crushing on hannah alright y’all don’t make fun of me bUT ??? HONESTLY ??? HER MUSES ARE SO WELL DEVELOPED & I LOVE LISTENING TO HER TALK ABOUT THEM & READING THE INTERACTIONS ?? HONESTLY LIKE ??? hannah ?? my heart . i followed her because i loved her blog & she seemed so chill & now ?? i love hannah with my whole heart y’all fight me on this my lil harambah .

Do We Role Play? : WE ??? do we roleplay rn ???? i’m not even sure but i know we’ve plotted ??? i’m not rping with a lot of people rn actually i do a lot of plotting though ?? & we’ve definitely plotted before ??? bUT WE ACTUALLY HAVE ROLEPLAYED ON PREVIOUS BLOGS SO ….. did i even answer this question right ??? idk but roleplaying with hannah is a blessing .

Do I Want To Role Play With Them : UM ? UM ?????? UM ????????? IS THIS EVEN A QUESTION ????? DUH ALL DAY EVERYDAY I LOVE HANNAH & HER WRITING & WRITING WITH HER IS ??? A TRUE BLESSING™ .

An AU Idea For Our Muses : i ….. i don’t even know ???? honestly give me all the muse aus like ???? we have so many & a big variety so …. HMM BUT ?? honestly ? that one au that we tried with rose ( who LOL i don’t have rn ….. ) ??? like a 1960s au or something ??? like that ??? IDK I JUST WANT ALL THE AUS WITH YOU OKAY  ??? SLAM IT ON MY DESK PLS

A Song For Our Muses : you know that one song ??? you’ve got a friend in me ??? hyuk @ ravi . HADSJKSDAS

Do I Ship Our Muses? : UM ??? do we like … ship rn ??? we’re planning ships i think but we don’t have any ships rn ???? BUT HONESTLY I WANT TO SHIP WITH YOU & ???? IT WOULD BE A BLESSING SOOO …

What I Think About The Mun : HOOOOO O KFMFMFFMFGGGG THIS IS GONNA BE SO LONG I FEEL IT IN MY VEINS OKAY FIRST OFF LIKE LET ME JUST SAY HOW MUCH I LOVE HANNAH ??? HONEST TO GOD TRUTH LIKE ???? HANNAH IS MY WHOLE HEART & SOUL & I LOVE HER SO MUCH ??? Y’ALL HAVE NO IDEA HANNAH IS THAT FRIEND THAT YOU JUST LIGHT UP WHEN YOU SEE HER MESSAGES BECAUSE YOU LOVE TALKING TO HER SO MUCH LIKE ??? HANNAH & I CLICK JUST ??? IDK LIKE ?? SHE’S HARAMBAH & I LOVE HER ALRIGHT MY CHEST IS SO WARM TYPING THIS ??? LIKE ??? honestly i love hannah . legitimately . sometimes when i think about it , i just sit there , yaknow ? like what would my life be without her ? LOL REALLY SHITTY IS THE ANSWER TO THAT QUESTION BECAUSE HANNAH JUST ?? IS AN ENHANCEMENT TO YOUR LIFE OKAY LIKE ?? honestly it’s really hard to say in words but ?? i love her & anyone that wants to hurt her or plans to or hurts her in anyway ???? we can square up rn .

Overall Opinion : i mean …. that previous section was really long but LOOK !!! HANNAH’S blogs are amazing & her muses are so ??? intricate & i love her & them ( & my babie hyeon ) DAJSKS IMMM IMM SO EMOTIONAL RN I LOVE YOU HANNAH

Blog Rate : 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | INFINITY .

[thelillzmonster]

bad | 03

↳   He was the cliché bad boy. He was the guy you couldn’t stand. He was the handsome, good-looking young man who made girls swoon for just a touch. He was a brat. You had never liked him one bit, but you had also stayed out of his business. Until one day, when you were in the wrong place, at the wrong time.

pairing; jeon jungkook x reader (ft. kim taehyung)

genre; romance, smutish, fluff

words; 2 856

| 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | coming soon ↠ 

A/N: I enjoy writing this, so the fact that you guys like it makes me so happy. thank you to everyone who sent a nice message, it means so much

“You look like shit.” Hyeim, your roommate, matter-of-factly announced from behind her round glasses. You only glared up at her, head sticking up from the cereal bowl in front of you. Her gaze was just as indifferent and uncaring as ever. She shrugged. “Just saying.”

And then she was sliding back into her room, door closing swiftly behind her. These were the kinds of times you hated having her as a roommate. She barely ever spoke to you, other than when she had something judgmental to say or served you the harsh truth. On one hand, it had taught you to be truthful to yourself and not deny what was obvious. On the other hand, usually when she had a reason to say something to you, it was a time when that really wasn’t what you needed to hear. Or wanted to hear, at least. She was too blunt.

But more often, you really appreciated her as a roommate. She never disturbed you. She never secretly borrowed anything from you. She never got into arguments or disagreements with you. She was always truthful. She never got in your way and usually stayed in her room whenever you had friends over. And she always let you vent your frustrations at her. Once, when you were really sad and heartbroken from a breakup, she had even given you a hug and ordered pizza, offering to watch a movie with you. She hadn’t really said anything; she had just done it.

This morning, however, just wasn’t one of those mornings when you remembered anything good about her. Or about anything in general. Because you were nothing but tired, nauseous and pissed.

The events from the previous night replayed like a broken record in your head, and you couldn’t make it stop for the life of you. You had danced with Park Jimin; you had made out with Kim Taehyung; and you had slapped Jeon Jungkook - the school’s bad boy trio. The weirdest and most frustrating part was, you didn’t really know any of them. There had never been so much regret bubbling in your stomach before, it hurt.

Another frustrated groan grumbled up from the back of your throat, ending in a whine as you exasperatedly laid your forehead down against the flat table top. You had fucked up, you had royally screwed yourself over. In a way, you were proud for having slapped Jungkook across the face; he had it coming. But in another way, it had gotten you even more involved than you already were after having walked in on him in the girls’ bathroom. This was why you never got involved with people from the same school - let alone the same class.

Your body felt heavier than ever before as you sighed, eyebrows furrowing in a displeased expression. What made it all even worse, was that you couldn’t even blame your behavior on alcohol, since you had only had about two sips of it.

‘I’m a fucking idiot.’

Desperate for a distraction, you picked up your phone that was lying on the table beside you, and were met by eighteen messages from Minyoung. She was probably dying to know about the party. You hadn’t texted her since you came home at about one in the morning, and weren’t planning on confronting her until school the next day. You needed the Sunday you had to get in a better mood and not talk about it, or you would probably explode. After all, it was only one party where you had gotten into a situation with only three people (or two, really). Soon, it would all be over and forgotten, you hoped.

Everyone knew.

You were more or less the talk of the school.

It hadn’t been as noticeable during first and second period, but by lunch, the odd and suspicious looks people shot you had increased wildly, and not being an idiot, you put the puzzle pieces together. The few instances you had heard ‘wait, who is she?’, ‘she’s in his class,’ or ‘she straight up bitch slapped him,’ had only confirmed your assumptions.

And never had you felt smaller and more vulnerable than in this situation. People weren’t necessarily giving you evil looks, but the sheer fact that they were even looking at you in the first place, was making your bones shake. You weren’t used to the attention, neither did you like it. But God must have been paying some kind of attention to you, because the three boys in question had decided not to show up for classes today, at least not yet.

You sighed heavily, head hung low as you scooped noodles into your mouth from the plastic bowl beneath you. Being too caught up in dealing with your own frustration over everything, it had somehow slipped your mind that the gossip would spread despite only having happened two days prior. Of course everyone would find out; always when it was about Jeon Jungkook. It was dumb, but it was the reality.

“I don’t know how you even managed this,” Minyoung frowned from opposite you, eyeing everyone suspiciously as they eyed her back. You had already verbally punished her for convincing you to go to the party, and you were finally back on even grounds. She still owed you, though.

You only shoved more noodles into your mouth, feeling far too many stares boring into you from every direction. You should have gone somewhere else to eat, not the cafeteria.

“But on the bright side, I don’t think they’re talking shit about you,” Minyoung made an attempt to make you feel better. “Honestly, they’re probably impressed that you dared to slap someone like him. It takes guts.”

You swallowed the chewed noodles and glared up at her, still trying to keep yourself hunched over and small.

“Minyoung, I don’t care what they’re saying. It bothers me enough that they even know. It makes the whole thing bigger than it is.”

“I guess you’re right.”

“I already heard people suspecting that Taehyung and I went second base, and if they find out, it’s gonna blow up even more.”

“What? How did they find out?”

“Someone must have seen us kissing at the party… Fuck.”

You inwardly groaned again, before redirecting your focus back on the noodles. How did people not seem to lose interest? They just fed off of drama.

Minyoung sighed, probably also uncomfortable at the attention but stayed silent.

But suddenly, you could hear everyone start whispering vigorously around you. You carefully glanced around and saw that people were looking in another direction. ‘Finally,’ you thought, but the bliss was cut short when Minyoung cussed, starting to look anxious, having looked in the direction everyone else had.

“(Y/N),” She called out with wide eyes, making you look at her, confused. “They’re here.”

You swore your blood ran cold at her words. There was a small glimpse of hope that told you ‘maybe she means someone else,’ but believing that would be lying to yourself. And it wouldn’t change the truth either way.

You carefully straightened your back to sneak a peek from behind the people blocking your view - noting that some of them were once again looking at you. If your blood had ran cold a second ago, it now froze.

���I take it back; God doesn’t care for me at all.’

In through the doors walked none other than the three bad boys themselves, making a dramatic entrance that would fit well in a high school movie. In fact, the whole scene would, considering that all the attention was on them - apart from the people glancing at you.

Immediately when you saw him, dark brown bangs covering half his eyes, red beanie contrasting his black leather jacket, and worn out Timberlands beginning to strut around the occupied tables, you ducked for your life.

“Shit, shit ,shit,” You hissed out, chin almost touching the table top. You had never felt such a strong taste of panic on your tongue before, and you would probably have puked if it wasn’t for the tense muscles that held it down.

The ironically loud sound of whispering didn’t make it any better; in fact, if nobody knew about the situation, you’d be almost perfectly fine. Almost.

Though, your eyes were braver than you were and before you could stop them, they were glancing towards the trio.

The said boys were only walking to the vending machines, probably there to buy something to eat for lunch (or most likely breakfast for them).

‘Why did they come here for that?’

“D-do you think they saw me?” You whispered out, voice pleading.

Minyoung’s eyes narrowed quizzically while looking in their direction.

“I’m not sure. But, I’m not gonna lie, they will probably notice considering everyone is… People aren’t that discreet.”

You sighed, finding agreement with her words and tried to find the best way to get out of the situation.

“Okay, let’s just-… I’ll just shove this down my throat and we’ll be out.” You announced before your grip tightened considerably around your chopsticks and you stuffed your mouth with the noodles. If you weren’t as hungry as you were, you would have left the food and ran. But dealing with a day like this on an empty stomach, was not going to cut it.

The people who were gossiping around you - more intensely now - had turned less bothersome as all your attention was on chewing and swallowing as fast as you physically could. But the truth of the fact that God really didn’t give a monkey’s about you wasn’t even funny anymore, because then you could make out from the corner of your eye, a figure was walking in your direction.

The reborn panic made you stutter in your chewing for only a second before you quickly returned to your actions, even faster this time.

‘Please, keep walking. Please, keep walking. Please, keep walking. Please, keep walking. Please, keep wa-’

Your thoughts were immediately interrupted when there was suddenly a shadow hovering over you.

“(Y/N),” a deep, familiar voice grumbled. You noticed the whispering around you had stopped.

Shakily, you turned your head to look up at who it was and swallowed the contents in your mouth with a loud gulp.

“T-Taehyung,” You greeted back, voice sounding small as a mouse.

Unsurprisingly, he had a smirk sitting proudly on his face as he looked down at you.

“How are you today?” He asked, glancing around at the people who were shamelessly staring at you two.

“Uhm, I’m fine.”

“Good. Oh, and I heard you landed a good one. Right on his left cheek, was it?” He was grinning now.

Your face started turning hot and you genuinely wished nothing but for the floor under you to open up and swallow you whole.

“That, uh-” You laughed awkwardly. “I-I did, but I-”

“Don’t worry about it. And I’m sorry that we were interrupted at the party when we were, ya know…… I had some, uh, business to take care of.”

You shook your head hastily.

“No, no. It’s fine.”

He grinned again.

“Great. You should have lunch with us sometime.”

“Us?” ‘-as in you, Jimin and… Jungkook?!’

“See you in class.” He only smirked, ignoring your question, and sent you a cheeky wink before he was off to the table where the other two boys were waiting.

Your wide eyes followed his figure as he sat down, the sound of whispers quickly being reborn again.

If they only suspected Taehyung and you had done something before, now they knew for sure.

‘Shit.’

You eyed the boy curiously, slowly sinking back into a bad posture, feeling more uncomfortable than you had that whole day. But then the feeling of another gaze boring into you caught your attention and it only took about a second for you to find that it was Jungkook, who was also sitting by the table.

A tingling shiver ran up your spine at the furious glare he sent you, staring right into your own eyes. His expression was calm, but his dark gaze carried nothing but dislike and anger. The eye contact felt like fire and ice and you were the ice, melting. You quickly looked away, not being able to take it anymore.

‘What have I gotten myself into?’

Minyoung sat stiffly in front of you, all but dumbfounded.

“(Y/N), are you done with your noodles so we can get the fuck out?” She whispered at you, probably uncomfortable because of the increase in unwanted attention.

You looked down at your forgotten bowl of noodles before daring to sneak one last glance at Jungkook, only to find that his glare was still determinedly directed at you, and suddenly you weren’t even hungry anymore.

“Ms (L/N), I’m sorry, but I will have to give you an F in this course if it keeps going like this. You have to start handing in your assignments before the deadline and this last report just wasn’t…”

Mrs Kwon’s words made you still in your place, face probably whiter than snow.

“I understand. I’m sorry.”

“Just make sure to work harder. Maybe look into a tutor.” She suggested, an apologetic, yet strict look on the English-teacher’s face.

You only managed a nod as a reply before you were walking out of the room and into the corridor.

School had gotten to be too much lately. Too many assignments to hand in at the same time had made you sloppy and worn out and a falling grade was bound to happen. But you couldn’t believe you were on the edge to an F. It had never happened before and that on top of the stress was just too much.

As soon as you reached your locker, instead of opening it, your back fell against the hard surface and you slid down until your butt was on the ground, wrapping your arms around your knees. The tight feeling in your chest boiled over and the next thing you knew you were silently sobbing into the fabric of your hoodie. The tears were probably caused by shock, because for some reason an F was impossible to you. It was something you had always stayed a good distance away from and it had fallen on you so suddenly that you weren’t steady enough to catch it.

‘It’s just a warning, (Y/N). You can still fix it.’ You thought, managing to still some of your tears.

“Bad day?”

At the sound of a voice, your head immediately snapped up. You had thought almost everyone had gone home. You felt yourself stiffen when you looked up at the source of the voice and instinctively stood up onto your feet, hastily wiping your cheeks clean of any remaining tear-trails.

Jungkook.

You eyed him warily, taking a few seconds to process that he had even spoken to you - discarding that he had basically appeared out of nowhere.

His eyebrow was raised as he sported a smirk, back leaned against the opposite wall, eyes looking back at you with an unwavering, unfriendly-feeling stare.

“You don’t care.” You stated bluntly.

He let out a sound that was some kind of mixture of a scoff and a snort.

“You’re right; I don’t.”

“Then why did you ask?” You were persistent, your situation already made worse because he was there.

“’Cause it’s humane,” He offered.

“You’re not humane.” You pointed out, words seemingly not affecting him at all.

“And you’re really ugly when you cry.”

You scoffed in disbelief at his insulting, blunt words.

His eyes narrowed as he frowned.

“But I guess it was for nothing, ‘cause you’re still ugly.”

You only rolled your eyes at that, shaking your head.

“Idiot.” You stated, only making him shrug. “Why are you even bothering talking to me?”

He sighed heavily, looking down at his fingers.

“I’m bored. Tzuyu’s so fucking slow.”

‘Zhou Tzuyu? The sophomore cheerleader?’

“You have nothing better to do than to insult someone who’s already feeling like shit?”

He looked up at you again.

“No. Besides, I don’t like you and I really don’t care if you feel like shit anyway.”

Ouch.

You huffed out a breath in distaste, but you weren’t going to let him get to you.

“Whatever, Jeon. I’m gonna leave now.”

“Please do, (L/N).”

You only sent him a glare, trying to ignore the fact that it was probably the first time you had heard him say your name - last name, to be precise. You hadn’t even been sure if he knew it up until that point.

You pivoted on your heel but only managed a few steps forward before you stopped yourself, turning back around to face him. He was still looking at you.

“Oh, and also, sorry I slapped you.”

His eyebrows furrowed when he frowned, looking slightly confused.

“Why? You’re not sorry, are you?”

“No.”

“Then why’d you apologize?”

You placed a mocking smile on your face.

“’Cause it’s humane. And I’m actually human, not a pig like you.“

He snorted.

But before he could respond, you were already walking away, small smirk threatening to sneak onto your lips.

[JAN 10 - 2017 2:07 AM]

[kaikeidou-backstage-blog]

Kaikeidou Ibun: M.c.s. - Tale of Shrine Migration, part 3

♪： Miss Shrine Maiden of Watatsumi (NicoCommons) (YouTube) "...And so, Lady Otohime went off to do an inspection of the outside world." "Did she really? I do worry that we may be causing her trouble..."

 Megumi informed Mikoto of Otohime's proposition. Mikoto, after receiving said message, replied somewhat apologetically.

"For now, let's just leave the location up to Lady Otohime. In the meantime, we'll get things ready for the shrine's construction."

"Yes, quite."

 Just as the two of them came to an agreement and made to leave, Mikoto clapped her hands together, apparently having remembered something.

"After that... we just have to recruit a human who can gather faith for us, and we'll have the perfect conditions to establish the branch shrine." ".....Huh?"  Mikoto's comment came completely out of left field for Megumi, who rubbed her eyes and stared at her.

"Um... Lady Mikoto, this is the first I've heard of that."

"Oh, did I not mention it? Well, I figured that if we want to obtain faith, it would be good to have someone who'll bear that role for us... that is to say, a human who would serve as a shrine maiden."

"Aaaa human?"

"Aaaa human."

"Can't we get away with using a mermaid? I mean, ningen, ningyo, it's only one syllable off..."

"Well, um... I'm not exactly an expert, myself..."

 First a location in the modern world, then the shrine's main building, and now this. Another problem for the new Kaikeidou to address had just sprung up. ......  Elsewhere, at a certain spot in the modern world. Otohime-- looking for all the world like a human child-- stood where the sunlight filtered through the tree leaves, her eyes fixed on a certain spot.

"...Yep. This is definitely gonna be it."

 She turned on her heel to look at the ocean, with its faintly-crested waves, and the seashore, burning both into her memory. This was her intended location for the Kaikeidou, and the foundation of her latest "idea". "Um, excuse me-- are you perhaps a tourist?"  As Otohime gazed at the sea, a young woman could be heard calling out to her. As soon as Otohime heard this, the corners of her mouth turned up, and she had to fight back the urge to laugh joyously right then and there. She turned to the woman in question, with a tranquil expression hiding her inner excitement.

"Mm? Oh man, sorry, couldn't hear you over the wind. Are you someone from around here, by any chance?"

"No, I'm just a student passing by here. Are you on vacation?"

 At Otohime's response, the young woman repeated her question. Otohime replied to the question she'd already heard with an answer that she'd already prepared.

"Well, I guess you could say that. I was hoping I could find someone who knows the lay of the land around here? Ask them a few questions, y'know?"

"Mmm... I am visiting this town as a student, but I came from elsewhere too, so compared to everyone else..."

"Hm~mmm..."

 The young woman answered Otohime with an awkward smile. Otohime didn't speak to her any further; she just gazed off into space absently. After briefly watching Otohime where she stood, the young woman, too, walked away in silence.

 And, as she watched the woman leave out of the corner of her eye, Otohime could hardly contain her excitement.

 Everything had been in line with Otohime's stratagem from the very beginning.

 The plan to move to a new location,

 the decision to use this particular spot,

 and the person who had talked to her, too... ...... "Lady Mikoto, are you gonna, like, move away?" "Lady Mikoto, are you really gonna go bye-bye?"

 Mikoto was speaking with the youngest Kai sisters in the Kaikeidou's entry hall. Minamo, the youngest of them all, was sitting on her lap, and Suzuri was clinging to her left shoulder. She was the spitting image of "the mother of the ocean", perfect and unmistakable.

Innocent Gatekeeper Minamo Kai

Immature Gatekeeper Suzuri Kai

 Following Mikoto's earlier discussion, the sisters both wore concerned expressions. Despite Mikoto's actual intentions, it appeared that they had taken the concepts they'd discussed literally.

"No, don't worry. I will always be here in the Kaikeidou. I'll still be right here with all of you, too."

 Creating a branch shrine involved splitting off the resident god's power; the divided units can then each provide 100% of the god's original power. As such-- if the shrines were constructed properly-- it was possible to create infinitely many shrines with exactly the same strength. Thus, even if Mikoto remained in the Kaikeidou, her divinity in the modern world's branch shrine... and, of course, Mikoto herself... could continue to exist. That was why Mikoto said she'd be right there with them "too".

"That aside, I'm surprised that we actually need a human's power. Even though both Lady Mikoto and Megumi bear the name of Yaobikuni..."

 Kasumi Shindou raised a concern of hers, while sending up a cloud of bubbles.

"That's just the way things are. Even if Yaobikuni has a well-known mainstream presence, I am a sea goddess, and Megumi is a mermaid. Just like how Kasumi is a shen, we each have a species whose constraints we must adhere to."

 Mikoto answered with a noncommittal smile, as if she didn't quite know what expression to make.

"If Gensokyo has no need for an ocean, I believe that getting back on our feet and setting our sights on the modern world will give the Kaikeidou deeper significance. Also..."

"Also?"

 Mikoto trailed off, and Megumi inquired further.

"All of us, from youkai to sea gods, need humans who can acknowledge us. No being can exist without humanity, after all."

 This was also the reason that the ten sisters of Kai were born.

 The Kaikeidou was beneath a deep, deep ocean. The span in which humans could forget about its existence, too, was extremely short. It was for that reason that they had previously welcomed a human visitor, paralleling the legend of Urashima Tarou. The Kaikeidou was able to maintain its current form as a result, but they had no idea when that could break down again. After all, they had no idea how long those humans (plural) would remain alive.

 At Mikoto's words, Megumi clapped her hands in realization.

"Oh, I get it! If we recruit a shrine maiden, we'll receive really strong acknowledgement. So both our Great Mother's power and the Kaikeidou's existence will become stronger too!"

"Yes, that about sums it up. Though, of course... we do have to find the all-important human in question, first."

 Megumi at last expressed strong assent, but none of the Kaikeidou's residents still had any idea where to find a shrine maiden who'd volunteer to work at this deep-sea Dragon Palace. Mikoto and the others, beginning to feel as if they were just spinning their wheels, let out a chorus of sighs. " " "*Sigh*..." " " "My, my, my! What's with these long faces, everyone?"  Just as the three sighed in unison, the familiar voice of a guest rang out from beyond the sea's depths.

"Hey, look, it's Lady Otohime!"

"Lady Otohime came back...!"

"Hey there, Minamo and Suzuri! You know, it's almost a shame you two aren't twins, with how similar you look."

 Otohime Kanpukugu rustled Minamo and Suzuri's hair as they ran up to welcome her. Her expression was soft and friendly, as if to say that everything was going according to plan.

"Welcome back, Lady Otohime. Did you enjoy your sightseeing in the outside world?"

 Mikoto gave a deeply reverential bow; not as a goddess, but as the leader of those who waited upon Otohime first and foremost. Megumi, Kasumi, Minamo and Suzuri bowed as well, following her lead. Otohime casually waved off the formal welcome, and began speaking to Mikoto.

"Well, for starters, I've found a potential site. It's not that far away, and as luck would have it, there's already a shrine related to Mikoto there too!"

"Oh, that sounds just wonderful. I'm so dearly looking forward to seeing it. Incidentally..."

 Just as Mikoto started to talk about the Kaikeidou's shrine maiden, Otohime stuck her hand out in front to signal her to stop.

"No need to worry about that! While I was looking for a good spot, I found a good human too. I think she'll fill the role of the Kaikeidou's administrator perfectly."

"Administrator... Lady Otohime, did you also realize that the Kaikeidou needs a human representative?!"

 Otohime's statement came as a shock to Megumi. Mikoto, too, couldn't help but raise a hand to her mouth in surprise.

"Eh, yeah, y'know. Not to say that I wasn't also searching for a human 'cause I wanna see a flashy shoot-out like with Owari and friends from before, though."

"I, ah, I see..."

 Otohime's joyful expression brought Megumi just a little bit of unease.

"...Well, leaving that second half aside, just what kind of human was she...?"

"Ah, well, you see..." ...... The sea of the modern world was calm.

Despite how its depths were rumbling, in anticipation of the coming banquet.

The wind of the modern world was excited.

Together with the sea goddess, for their ancestral god was listening to their song.

A girl of the modern world was gazing out.

Upon the sea that she was, however distantly, related to. Alright, then. I s'pose it's about time for us to get up and about. You youngsters want to see a nice spectacle soon too, don't you? In that case... Just hold on for a lil' while while we get the banquet started. ------- ---- -