#god and here i am wanting to find love when i'd be the worst most dull partner ever fuck me

[theholtster]

To all the people I've had conversations with that end with me barely saying anything or just nothing at all it's not because I'm disinterested it's just because I'm a stupid failure who can't communicate at all like a normal human being sorry for the mixup

[tan1shere]

Do you think you could please do something with eva like hurt/comfort ig? If you're comfortable maybe like reader had super bad anxiety and something triggers her and she basically has an anxiety attack and closes herself in her room but eva comforts her?

Here For You

Eva x female reader !

A/n: yes ofcourse ! If you are new here, welcome I am more than comfortable doing anxiety as I suffer from it and I know a thing or two about the stupid thing ! This is for my anxiety girlies I love you deeply <3 YOU ARE LOVED HEAPS !!!!!!

Summary: Eva helps calm you down when you need it most.

Warnings: anxiety, anxiety attack, think that's the main ones, lmk if I missed anything major !

Masterlist

It was as if you had been on edge lately and you had absolutely no idea why. Which worried you, why did you feel like this with no reasonable explanation. You have been traveling for awhile now to go see your long distance girlfriend, Eva. She had moved awhile back and you wanted to see a tour of her new place. You were tired, sick of driving. So you were incredibly thankful once you had pulled in, looking at the massive house infront of you. She greets you outside with a smile. "Hi baby girl." Her feet move towards your door instantly opening it. Your energy comes back, leaping out and into her arms. Wrapping your legs around her torso in the process. "I missed you." You say into her neck as you hug her tightly. Her hand makes its way into your hair gently stroking. "Not as much as I missed you."

After a few kisses it was time to see the inside. "This place is huge!" You beam, turning around in a circle to get a look at everything. "It is, has many rooms." You then look at her, smiling tiredly. "You look exhausted." She then says, coming over to you. You nod as a reply, sinking back into her touch. "I have some people coming over later on-" You pull away slightly to look at her. You were always an anxious person, social anxiety was a main. You hated meeting new people, you felt so incredibly awkward. Your brain makes you overthink, not to mention the panic and anxiety attacks you'd get.

"I know, but its ok I'll be here with you I promise. Besides I'd love for you to meet my friends. They'll love you." You sigh. "They won't once they find out im an anxious idiot." She looks at you sadly. "You're not an anxious idiot baby. I swear to you. You're the sweetest thing in this world." She speaks delicately as she goes to hold your face in her soft hands. You close your eyes, taking a breath. "I'm still unsure.." Her thumb rubs your cheek. "I'm right here. - promise."

You trusted that she'd keep that promise, and she did. But you couldn't help feeling judged by all these new people. Even if they weren't you couldn't shake the thought. You were staying super close to Eva, honestly wanting this to be all over so you could sleep, and spend your time with her. You tried your hardest to put on a smile, make out you weren't shaking in your boots. You felt pathetic, why did you get like this.

Then the worst happens. A question was being asked. "So, Y/n. How long have you known Eva?" A girl named Cricket asks. You pause for a bit. "Uhm, 3 years now?" You look at Eva, wanting a little bit of backup. You were so stupid God. "Yes! 3 years and more to come." She smiles at you, a smile that sets your nerves at ease for a moment. Feeling like all of this went away. But then she speaks again. "And where abouts are you from again?" Your head turns to her. "A few hours, uhm from here." You try so hard to sound confident but your voice indeed comes out shakey. And you heard it. The worst part.

Your overthinking comes into play.

Shes going to think I'm a weirdo. Why can't I just talk normal. What's. Wrong. With. Me.

That little voice clouds your brain making you miss what she had asked you next, you feel a hand come in contact with your back. Bringing you out of the thoughts slightly. "W-what?" You ask, more shakey than before. Eva rubs lightly. "Are you alright love-?" Cricket asks sweetly. The thoughts had time to creep back up on you in that small space of time. "I- excuse me.." You rushed upstairs into Eva's room, locking the door in the process so no one could come in. You clutch your chest, trying to calm down but you couldn't. It felt heavy, making you freak out more.

Tears begin to stream uncontrollably. Taking in breaths as you choke on air. You slide down the door, gripping your hair. Having the same little voice repeat.

You're stupid.

You're awkward.

You are weak.

"I'm stupid.." You breathe out, still holding onto your chest. Then there was a knock at the door, startling you. "Baby?" Eva's soft voice was heard. You don't respond, not trusting your voice. "Please let me in you're worrying me, beautiful." You hear the door knob, reluctantly going to open it. Moving a bit for her to come in. Shes on the floor with you in an instant. Considering she's been with you through many of these. "Hey hey, look at me ok." You couldn't as you're freaking out continues. "Baby.." Your eyes shut. "Can I touch you?" You just nod, shed always ask that just to make sure she wouldn't startle you.

Her hands come to your face, getting you to look at her. "Breathe angel breathe." Her eyes dart from yours, concern writen all over them. "You're ok, I'm here for you." "You are safe." You nod, understandingly. Slowly coming back. "I'm stupid Eva.. why am I like this." Her thumbs come to wipe your tears. "You are far from stupid my girl. For one you're tired. You've been driving all day, and you just feel things heavily. That's ok." Your head tilts slightly, taking in her words. "You're special, in the best way possible. And I love you so fucking much." She finishes, still having her hands on your face. "Im sorry." You apologize.

"Don't be, its ok. They're leaving now anyways." Your eyes widen. Was it because of- "And before that brain of yours tricks you. They were always going to leave at this time. I assure you." Her tone was steady and calm. Making your nerves ease again. "Do they think I'm weird?" Her head shakes side to side. "Crick, loved you. She said you were a breath of fresh air." The corners of your mouth move up, smiling as she says that. It only makes her smile too. "There she is." Her arms bring you into a tight hug. "My brain is stupid." You then say. She nods. "Incredibly." The smiles were still lingering. Just grateful to have someone like her. "Why don't we sleep this long day off?"

"Sounds, amazing."

[stargazer2709]

The Boogeyman & The Hangman | 1. After Hours

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I'm a Gotham man from birth. A man who lived under the wing of a Falcone for twenty years, even since I was just a young boy. Doing what I was good at made me who others think I am. Loving made me who I really am.

After the best part of my life, the job was just dealing with obstacles for the Family that I chose, or maybe they chose me. However, that didn't stop me from being kicked out, despite working there for almost half my life. Who doesn't love receiving nothing but pats on the back for their hard work?

The worst part about being unemployed is that you have nothing else to think about, and I can't deal with the absence of the woman who gave me hope at the lowest point in my life.

My former boss, Carmine Falcone, was killed a few days ago, and I can say that he has left a very big space to fill. Things have not been the same since he passed away, and with it the end of my service to the Family.

Anyway, today, November 23, I just finished one last pending matter, returning to my apartment tired, it being still very dark before dawn. Just when I think this early part of the day has been stressful enough, I get a phone call. No one but my good friend Oswald Cobb, calling at this hour, I'd be willing to bet he's screwed up somewhere and needs help or it's going to be a night of drinking.

“What's the matter, Oz?” I say as soon as I answer the call, and the phone is on my ear.

“Hey, what's up? Listen here, somethin' big just happened, and I'm gonna need a hand.” Yes, indeed, he screwed up. “Come on, I'm at the Iceberg Lounge, it'll be a quick matter.”

Oh God.

“Fine. I’ll be there.” As we finish talking, the call ends and I can only theorize what the hell mess Oz has gotten himself into this time to ask me for help.

Do I have another choice? Of course not, I don't. Since any Oz-related business involves a car, I have no need to use mine. I hail a cab outside my apartment and ask to be taken to the club. I pray that this little matter will not be so important and I can return home early.

Fast forward a few minutes and I'm here, at the Iceberg Lounge, closed for obvious reasons, after the blood of Gotham's most dangerous bastard was spilled literally right at that entrance. Getting out of the cab, my most reasonable option to find Oz would be in the back, and I was right. I can see the beautiful Maserati parked, but no sign of good old Oz.

I'm about to call him, when I'm surprised by the sound of a door opening and there's the man. Apparently he doesn't come alone. He looks at me with a certain sparkle in his eyes. He seems pleased to see me.

“Hey, come here now, I need someone strong. This kid is a fuckin' spaghetti strand, he's not helpin' me at all.” He sounds exhausted, apparently carrying something. Or someone.

“'Kid'? What kid?” The moment I approach to help, just after Oz, a young man comes out of the place, with a worried and completely scared expression. I don't know which part of this strikes me as weirder, the part where Oz is removing a corpse from his own club or that he just adopted a stray.

I help load the bagged corpse with the help of Oz and the guy I barely know and together we get to the trunk of the Maserati to leave the place. Closing the trunk, I finally get a breather and head over to Oz to talk.

“I don't know if I want to know who this poor idiot is, and what he did to end up like this." I say this jokingly, and receive a brief awkward silence, which is then softened by that oh-so-sarcastic Oz tone.

“You're right, you don't want to.” He pats me on the shoulder and walks with his classic limp towards the boy. “Now, you wanted my car so badly, you can drive.” After that, he gives the car keys to the young man, to which he agrees and takes them. “Go on.”

It was all a long, uncomfortable car ride to specific points in the city that would eventually end at a junkyard where Oz would dispose of the body. I waited in the car for a couple of minutes for the two guys to finish the job, sitting in the back seats, in this case, like a child with two parents arguing while he looks out the window.

As we return, the boy is back behind the wheel and Oz is in the passenger seat. The whole atmosphere feels lighter and my good friend turns to look at me with a more carefree smile.

“Hey, man, the kid's stayin' with us, okay? This is, uh... Victor.” He returns to his seat and continues smiling at me through the rearview mirror.

“Nice to meet you, Victor.” Now I lean over to the front seats and pat the boy on the shoulder, trying to comfort him, because I could tell he had had a bitter experience just now.

“N-nice... Nice to meet you too, sir.” He answers me and seems less nervous than he was a few minutes ago.

Oz smiles as he assures us that we are all in the same boat, as this mess seems to have only just begun. An issue later got in the way, as Oz was in charge of the Falcone Family's Drop operation, and he had to keep an eye on it, especially in these tough days. It's not all good news when it's time to start the engine once again to head to the Falcone Mansion, as my good friend has been requested for a 'business meeting'.

Holy crap, it's even dawn already.

And so, our journey ends at the entrance of the mansion, parking there, planning our next steps carefully.

“Alright, listen, if we don't come out...” There is a slight pause in his words and in an instant he continues. “Nah, we'll be fine. You'll be fine. It's gonna be fine.” The boy at this point doesn't know whether to actually be scared or not. Maybe it's just Oz playing one of his practical jokes on matters like this. For God's sake. “I'm messing with you, kid! Alright, just sit tight, you know? Maybe look for your sense of humor. It's gotta be here somewhere.”

Oh man, this guy. Before he interacted with his door to leave, I stopped him by putting my hand on his shoulder having approached him.

“Hey, hey, what do you mean by 'we'? Do I really have to go in there?”

“I need you to be there. That way they'll know I have your back, you know? Come on, they're just weak pricks, they couldn't do anything to you if they wanted to. You just have to be there, dammit." Without even letting me respond, he opens the door and walks out, leaving me behind.

As always, I can't let good old Oz go in there without me.

“Easy, Vic. It's just in and out. Just stay here.” Just like Oz did, I'm just trying to make the boy feel safe even in these circumstances. I open my door too and follow Oz into the mansion.

The doors open into a small dining room where the guys behind this stupid business are waiting for us.

“Johnny. Milos.” My good friend greets them both, walking around the place until he sits down. The two men pay attention to him, and then notice the anomaly here. Me.

“What the hell is he doing here?” The man sitting at the end of the table asks, clearly not happy to see me here.

“Hey, calm down, Johnny, he's with me, okay? If we can finish this soon, go ahead.” Oz has my back even when I'm not welcome in this house, at least not now, not when I have no one else to owe loyalty to.

Viti and Milos prefer to leave the matter aside so as not to make it bigger than it is. It's just blah blah, business, and they will move the operations to Robbinsville. Oz tries to counter-argue with an alleged shipment that will arrive in the next few days. I admit this guy always has an ace up his sleeve.

At this, the two subjects in front divert their attention to the other side of the room, leaving everything in an awkward silence. What the hell are they looking at?

“Sofia, please, join us.” Now Milos motions with his hand for the person they were looking at to come closer. But hearing 'Sofia', just that, makes my heart, without exaggeration, want to jump straight out of my chest.

Damn. Is it really her? It's been ten long years. Maybe I've gone mad and this is a product of my fatigue and exhaustion from long days of work.

“Oh, I didn't mean to interrupt.” That melodious voice echoes in my head over and over again. I'm so afraid of turning around and discovering that voice is just in my imagination, or maybe I'm hallucinating.

The fact that Oz turns to look behind him gives me some hope. Maybe I'm not hallucinating it. Maybe... it is her.

“Oz, you remember Carmine’s daughter?”

“Yeah.”

Oh my God. Seriously, it's her. I immediately turn around and what a surprise, it's her, Sofia Falcone, finally and after ten years, without a window in between to separate us.

“Sofia. I thought you were still at, uh...”

“Arkham?”

“Yeah.”

“No. I've been rehabilitated.” That lovely, subtle, elegant voice, along with a smile are so far the best damn thing that has happened to me this crazy week.

Just seeing her, out in the open, without that striped suit, finally within my reach, makes me feel so many things right now. I could take her in my arms, hug her, kiss her, as if the day after this one didn't exist, but I can't take that risk. Not even for me. For her. I would love to be able to obey my feelings, my heart, but the show must go on.

“Miss Sofia, it's... A pleasure to have you back home.” And there it is, my best attempt at the proper, formal man the Falcones had hired long ago, the one who would never dare even look in the same direction as the princess of the family.

She looks at me, instantly deducing my false role as a bodyguard who is just doing his job, without any personal motives or love affairs involved. That smile on her face could mean many things. To those in the room except me, it might just seem like a polite response to my greeting. But for me, I think it's the best way she finds to reciprocate without pulling back the curtain of fiction.

“Yes, quite a pleasure, indeed.” She answers dryly, as if my presence doesn't keep her awake at night, as if I'm just someone else standing in the room like the rest of the guards at home. Without anything else to add, she looks back at the back of the room, now addressing Milos. “Have you asked him about my brother?”

“I thought we agreed-” The bearded man tries to reply but is interrupted by the beautiful and elegant newcomer.

“Have you heard from Alberto?” Now she asks Oz the questions, maybe he might have answers.

“Al?”

“He went out last night, he refused his bodyguards, and he never came home.” She remains sharp with her words, but I can bet that deep down she is dying of anguish to know the whereabouts of her brother.

“Sofia, that's enough.” Viti breaks the tense atmosphere, putting his word over hers.

“I-I better get out of here.” Feeling this atmosphere as much as everyone else, like water almost reaching the point of drowning him, Oz decides to leave before this gets worse. He walks to the exit, but not before saying goodbye. “And, uh... It's good to see you.” After this, he walks away, not even making sure I'm following behind him.

“Well, uh... I think... I should go too.” Personally, I also feel the tide rising over me until I almost drown and I decide to leave too before the bomb explodes. “Excuse me, gentlemen.” I nod my head to the two men, and then to the beautiful young lady. “Miss.”

I'm about to start walking out of the room when Sofia stops me in my tracks, mentioning my name, and having all my attention to herself, she speaks up. “Don’t go yet. We have a lot to talk about. I’ll wait for you at the end of the hall.”

At this point I have no idea how to react. Maybe this really is Sofia's new mood, or maybe it's her wonderful acting tool in front of the judging eyes of the Family. Whatever it is, it's Sofia, and I would do anything for her. I nod again and I can leave the room, still trying to come to terms with what has happened. The woman I once loved and still love is here, just when I thought I couldn't miss her anymore in life. Once upon a time this seemed like something far away from happening.

Only a few minutes pass when I see Sofia coming towards me. That white outfit of hers suits her incredibly well, and I've noticed that over time she looks even more beautiful than she did years ago. She stops right in front of me, looking up at me with her gaze that now seems more vulnerable than a moment ago, as if just passing through the door made her mood change.

With her so close, I can only think about the time we missed each other, and which I plan to make up for. Starting now.

Finally, after a long time, I can feel Sofia's body and the warmth of it close to me, having surrounded her tightly with my arms, bringing her closer to me. Every part of me shivers at the feeling of this kind of physical contact with her. Her hands touching my back in response to my hug causes something in my body that I haven't felt in years, and I'm not exaggerating. It feels like we haven't hugged like this in a lifetime. After all, I've waited a whole decade for this.

“I... I don't know what to say, honey, I... I missed you so much.” Along with my body shaking, my voice shakes being so close to her, and I can't find a better time to speak than now, hugging her body.

“I know, love, I know.” Her voice so close to my ear is just one of many reasons why my knees might give out and let me fall to the floor. She buries her face in my neck area, feeling her hot breath on my skin, which only makes me want more. “I'm finally here, just for you...”

We separate from each other's embrace and, standing face to face once again, the kiss we've been waiting for years is a reality. Every second Sofia's lips press against mine makes the seconds I spend missing her, wanting her, worth it. I just want to stay like this forever, enjoying this moment for longer than circumstances could offer me. A caress on my cheek gives me the reassurance I needed. My love is back, and she's not going anywhere from now on, and I wouldn't let her go again.

Sofia's slender fingers slide over my cheek after she pulls away from me once our kiss is over. I can still taste her on my lips, and though I could have a lot more of them another time, her presence is enough for me. A warm smile appears on her face and that's when she speaks again.

“Like I said before, honey, we have a lot to talk about, so I hope you're hungry. We'll go get lunch.” Damn, she's so straight-laced when she wants something. And I'm certainly in.

This day just gets better and better.

[anonzentimes]

hi zen!! my friends and i are doing a powerpoint night this monday and like any self-respecting person almost 7 months deep in a dangan hyperfixation (i'm never getting out of here) i am using it as a platform for an all-encompassing kmhn infodump. this powerpoint is going to be the komahina bible and i want to hit Every Stop. i will grab everything i can find. no hesitation. however !! the danganronpa franchise is A Lot. so there's always a chance i will miss something. so! as a fellow kmhn understander and enthusiast, is there any particular Komahina Moment or piece of analysis you feel people often miss or overlook? could be big or small, or involve just one of the two of them, but i'd appreciate the input! <3 have a good one :D

OH MY GOD??? I’LL TRY TO ANSWER IN TIME FOR YOUR POWERPOINT LMAO THAT SOUNDS AWESOME?????? You should record it! Well, you probably will, but I’m still saying it anyways just in case you aren’t, because something that fun going unrecorded sounds like a tragedy!

I’ve had ideas of doing all encompassing komahina rambles for a video or something, but I’m already working on other projects so It’ll be a long time before I even try lmao. Makes me happy someone is trying something similar, and with friends no less! I’d be happy to help in any way I can, I hope you and your friends have fun! :D

ANYWAYS. I’ll say a huge ramble of Komahina things and hope it helps LOL.

This is more of a silly statement, but for a FULL Komahina coverage I think it’s most satisfying to cover the different flavors of komahina, if that makes sense? Like, depending on what approach you’re taking you may not cover kamukoma, since to a degree that’s an entirely different ship, but you’d still cover the canon adjacent other flavors. Basically, try including the canon adjacent variations!!! The Dangan island events are good for analyzing their dynamic with less horrible circumstances bringing them to worst and causing them to hurt each other. The stage plays are also great to mention since there’s some komahina content that is play original, and seeing them physically interact is fun! Can’t forget the Komahina CD too Lol. There’s also smaller things like their anniversary outfits, especially the matching purple ones, their animal outfits, and their Danganronpa S Swimsuits!

Little details that are so special to me are things like the parallel of Nagito waking Hajime up being reserved in Danganronpa 2.5, and there’s also how things like Hajime’s grief for Nagito that’s so compelling, special, and telling about their dynamic.

I think my main thing to actually add on properly is that, a lot of people say Hajime hates Nagito which is absolutely incorrect. I don’t think I’d try so hard or care enough to revive and or wait until a person I hated woke up. Hajime displays he actively cares a lot, they just happen to feel hurt and betrayed by each other due to the circumstances. Komahina is unhealthy but it isn’t toxic, if that phrase makes sense. The beauty of it is that they grow TO be healthier, they learn to love each other, understand each other, and in the process learn to understand and love themselves. Komahina is reciprocal, it gets unhealthy due to circumstances, but it is reciprocal and the beauty of it is them becoming healthier together.

Nagito is not a malicious psychopath, and Hajime is not an overly horny person with no personality, I see them misinterpreted and characterized like that constantly It’s ridiculous. Hajime is awkward, conflicted, introverted, caring, and tries to be positive but ultimately is usually a realist. Hajime gets attached to people easily and deals with discrimination, insecurity, and self esteem. Hajime is relatable enough to where he’s empathetic but unique enough to where he’s special.

Nagito is a mentally ill queer coded man who is an antagonist and an anti-hero. He is morally gray when it comes to his unhealthy coping mechanism and has complicated beliefs, he’s honest, intelligent, struggles with insecurity, struggles with self esteem, has absolute beliefs influenced by hope’s peak, is a parallel and warped version of Makoto while being his own person, and he’s very sweet. Nagito’s love language seems to be mostly playful teasing, he rambles a lot and weirds people out just by saying what he thinks is fact. He has tonal issues and usually isn’t self aware, despite this he also worries about the impression he gives off if he thinks it matters. His beliefs are very hierarchy based and he thinks he’s all the way at the bottom, he doesn’t absolutely hate people like him but he thinks they have no purpose other than to help those more capable and projects onto them. Nagito is a very complex character, he is numb to intense situations due to the immense trauma of it being normal for him. He’s optimistic but also pessimistic, he’s positive but also incredibly anxious, he’s well intentioned but also thinks anything is okay if it’s for hope, there’s a lot to Nagito but in the end once it clicks it really clicks. He is contradictory in a way that perfectly makes sense, creating the perfect character. There’s a lot to him but when you understand him there’s no need for words, you just get it. There’s a feeling to him, an understanding, and I think that’s really special. He really is amazing.

Anyways, the ramble on summarizing both of their characters simply is to more expand on points about their dynamic! Nagito and Hajime are sides of the same coin. Nagito is irrational when it comes to Hajime in the way that he defies his normal behaviors because he usually avoids others and thinks he’s not worth the ultimates time, it means so much to me that Nagito just immediately had a feeling and connection with him. I’ve seen some people not think about it, but genuinely Komaeda feels something upon first sight and it’s irrational given his regular behavior it’s so sweet.

This has been just a lot of me rambling, but hopefully some of it helps! I had fun yapping haha, thanks for you ask!

[ernmark]

Juno Steel and the Case Closed (part 1) reaction

It's been a while since I've done one of these, hasn't it?

But it's the last episode, and I wanted to be here for the end. So if you'd like, some thoughts and theories under the cut:

It was a solid choice to have Nureyev go-- to make this final story about Juno and his world and his life, rather than specifically about their relationship. But also, the choices made around Nureyev's leaving-- holy shit.

Because here's a man who's spent the last twenty years entirely defined by his relationship with one man, and now he's cut loose and of course he's flailing to re-establish himself in a different orbit. And you can hear it in his voice, where it rises into something halfway to panic (amazing job, Noah Simes), and you can feel exactly how horribly wrong it's going to go if he goes down that road. And then there's Juno, who's healthy enough to be the voice of reason, even when it hurts him? Who makes it clear he's willing to wait until Nureyev is ready for him? Oh my god, that's perfection. (And Nureyev going maybe back to Brahma-- my little fanfic writer heart did a leap there). Nureyev may very well be back next episode (I suspect he will, if only for the final moments), but I really like this as an ending of their arc-- not the neatly laced up riding off into the sunset together, but looking forward to that sunset and being actually ready for it when it comes. It makes my heart feel so good.

--

And from that happy moment, to have Juno go back to Hyperion, to his office, and immediately start slipping back into his worst self? Oh, that's too real-- in a way that I am very happy with. Because he isn't 'fixed'. Juno 'born-a-sad-baby' Steel won't ever be 'fixed', not by romance or a vacation or a wonderful new family dropping him reminders of how much they love him. What's wrong with him isn't something that can be fixed-- but this time around it's different. This time around, when he yells at Rita she stands up to him (with a small, tremulous voice, because goddamn standing up to people you love is terrifying). I am so proud of her for that, and of him for backing off. It takes a palpable effort for him to rein himself in, but he's making that effort-- and he knows how, in a way that I don't think he did in those early seasons. It's a choice he's making, over and over again, just like it's a choice he makes to keep replaying Jet's wisdom instead of drowning his misery in tequila.

(Another kudos there: that Juno's problem isn't addiction, not the same way it is for Jet-- alcohol isn't a problem for him when things are going well, but it's easier to retreat into a bottle than to deal with his feelings. It's a distinction you don't see very often. Honestly, the way this show has dealt with addiction has been really refreshing to see.)

I've said from the beginning that one of the things that really drew me to this show was how it handles Juno's depression-- as a genuine mental illness that's an inherent part of him. And it's enheartening to see him struggle with it, but now be able to reach out for the tools and the support he needs. And that support doesn't have to be Jet literally talking him away from the bottle, or Rita or Nureyev petting him and making him feel better. He can reach for the pieces of them that they leave behind. And he can wish the Ruby 7 a good journey home, and send Nureyev to find himself, not without pain and grief, but without completely losing himself to it.

That kind of story gives me so much more hope than any kind of 'happily ever after' ever could.

--

And then the designated mystery, which has me so freakin' excited:

Nightmare.

She is the culmination of so many plot threads that I've been picking up on for so long and I'd completely forgotten about, and I am so freaking excited to see it.

I was in such a rough place emotionally when we last visited the most obvious of those threads, I genuinely don't remember if I posted meta about it or not, but it definitely struck some bells:

When Juno rescued Rita from Dark Matters, the safehouse she was in was described as being full of items that were clearly meant for a child. At the same time, Sasha was having Rita destroy all evidence of her own life so thoroughly that not even Rita herself would be able to find traces afterward.

It seemed most obvious to me that she was hiding a child (one that, I didn't realize until Juno remarked on Nightmare's area code, could have been hidden in the suddenly repopulated New Town without anybody asking inconvenient questions about who she was or where she came from). Also her taking care of a child would explain her ever-escalating reactionary tendencies-- she certainly wouldn't be the first parent who descended into authoritarianism in a misguided attempt to protect someone.

So some theories about who and what Nightmare is:

Alessandra's daughter is the most obvious, of course. (I still hold onto that theory that Sasha was either the Worst Client that Juno told Alessandra Strong about, or else that Sasha was the cheating spouse in that story.)

Nightmare could be Annie Wire's daughter-- assuming that Annie survived the factory, grew up, had a child of her own, and then died for real this time, leaving her grieving sister to raise her niece.

Nightmare could be Annie Wire herself-- dead, kept in stasis, revived by Dark Matters technology, and then whisked away to the safe house.

Nightmare could be a clone of Sasha and/or Annie. Honestly, not digging this theory, but I might as well throw it out there.

Nightmare could herself be a Radical, not unlike the Ruby 7, who's taken on Sasha's appearance and stayed that way ever since (after all, Sasha would have been at just about the right age when she was recruited by Dark Matters)

From a narrative standpoint, I'm most fond of the idea of Nightmare either being Annie or Annie's daughter, personally. Because that's literally the second mystery we were given, and it was pointedly never solved. As much as I like the idea that some mysteries just aren't and you have to make peace with that, I'm a big fan of long games like this, and of tugging on threads from the beginning of a story when you're wrapping up the end. That's especially true for Sasha's arc closing here, back in Hyperion City. Sasha's voice was one of the very first that we heard in this series, and Sasha's trajectory has always been a funhouse mirror version of Juno's. She's always been an integral part of his story. It seems fitting that her story gets wrapped up alongside his.

[ellieluvr420]

We meet again, darling pt.19 (detective Abby Anderson x criminal reader x detective Ellie Williams)

Synopsis: Abby Anderson is a skilled detective that's never let a criminal escape her grasp, until you. You've infiltrated every part of her life and she still can't get you. As she grows more and more intrigued by you she finds herself descending further into darkness until there's no way back. She takes your hand and follows you as if your presence is the only thing giving her life knowing that you are the most dangerous thing for her. Her life will never be hers again and she will stop at nothing to keep following you down your path of corruption.

7.32 PM

"I'd love to." You take a seat in the chair he's gesturing to and return his stony glare. "Tell me sweetheart. Who'd you have to fuck to get yourself here?"

You laugh at his comment more than you should and it leaves him confused.

"Well I could give you the list but it wouldn't do much, I'm here because I'm good at this. That's why you've never been able to beat me." His face turns to a scowl as he takes a drag of his cigar. He chuckles a little and then goes silent once again.

"You're arrogant. Didn't your parents teach you manners?"

"Nope."

"You must've been a very dislikeable little girl then. Nothing's changed I see."

"You seem to have a fascination with my childhood. Is there a question on your mind? or is that just your thing?" His head snaps up as he puts the cigar down.

"How dare you accuse me of such a thing." His voice is low and gravelly as he says it and you can't hide your amusement at his frustration. "I am fascinated though as to what happened in your childhood to make you turn out this way. Were you an orphan?"

"Nope. One brother, my best friend, and two parents that were in a loving marriage and loved us both very much. Perfect, picturesque family. But what way have I turned out? Different from you? Because that would be a mighty high horse for you to be sitting on if that's what you're saying."

"I've heard stories about the things you've done, always vague and never any details about who was committing the heinous acts, but I heard about the acts."

"Yeah? Tell me the worst story you've heard."

"Tell me the worst thing you've done."

"You first." He stays still for a moment until he picks up his cigar again and begins to speak.

"What?"

"Hello to you too, jesus." Ellie scoffed at Abby's rude greeting as she answered the phone. "I don't know what to pack because I don't know if we're going somewhere hot or cold."

"You really think there won't be a whole new wardrobe waiting for us when we get there?"

"True... She'll probably have bought us matching wardrobes."

"Ha yeah I swear we're like dolls to her."

"I've never had someone take so much pleasure in dressing me up, usually the joy happens when the clothes come off." Abby can practically see the smirk on Ellie's face just as Ellie can see the eyeroll coming from Abby.

"Was that all?"

"No actually, I was wondering if you wanted me to grab food from Michael's and then come to yours, can wait for her together."

"Oh right yeah, sounds good, thanks."

"The usual?"

"Yeah please."

"Okay, cool." Ellie hangs up before Abby can even say bye.

"Rude." She mutters to herself but internally she finds Ellie's bluntness charming, she'd always laugh to herself when she'd observe a conversation between Ellie and someone at work that ended in Ellie walking away obliviously while the other person stormed off cursing her rudeness under their breath. Abby returns to packing while thinking about what you're doing right now.

"You first."

"Fine. I heard of you killing a man's wife when he failed to repay his debts to you."

"That's the worst you heard? God people must think I'm pathetic."

He grimaces at your words. "Your turn."

"I set fire to a home where a family, two parents and two kids, were sleeping peacefully inside, I left the daughter to burn and I took the son with me, I killed him separately after I made him live through the pain of losing his perfect family and his perfect life, he became a monster just like me and then I slaughtered him like one too."

"Why?"

"Because I felt like it. Because I needed to. Why does it matter? Doesn't change what I did, see this is what limits people, always trying to find a justification for someone's actions. Once you accept that your actions can't and shouldn't be justified, you're free."

"Is that what you are? Free?"

"Exactly."

8.07 PM

Abby turns her attention from the TV as a knock sounds on her door, she opens it to see Ellie standing outside with takeout and her comically small suitcase.

"Is that seriously all your bringing?"

"Leave me alone this is a regular sized suitcase." Abby stands aside to let her come in.

"Yeah for a two week holiday. Hate to break it to you but this is not that."

"Oh whatever. Can't believe I got you food."

"From Michael's as well? You're too cute."

"Shut up. Figured we should have it at least once more before we leave."

"Do you remember how much we used to go there when we were officers, makes me feel old thinking about it."

"That's because you are old."

"You're two years younger than me."

"Still..." They had both sat on the sofa and were ripping open the bag of food when Ellie paused. "Has she ever told you how old she is?"

Abby goes to reply back acerbically and then she realises you hadn't, you hadn't asked how old Abby was either though, she assumed you knew anyway but she realised she didn't know how old you are, she had always guessed you'd be a similar age to her because of the time it would take you to build your business to the level it is now but she didn't actually know. "Er no she hasn't. I'm ashamed to say I've never asked."

"Has there ever been time for small talk like that?" Ellie looks at Abby knowingly as they both chuckle.

"No I guess not."

"I wonder what it will be like, you know being with her just us 3 on our own, no business."

"I think there's a high likelihood of us driving her up the wall and ending up buried somewhere."

"Yeah that's a fair guess." They both waste no time in stuffing their faces with the huge burgers Ellie had bought as Abby presses play on the Family guy episode she was watching.

8.45 PM

You checked your watch to see that, provided everything went to plan, your men would be done seizing all of the Met's shipments, you wanted to wait until you knew everything had gone smoothly for them before you killed him and judging by the fact none of his guys had burst through the door to alert him of your plan you assumed everything went as it should have.

"Got somewhere to be sweetheart?" Your roll your eyes at the pet name and stand.

"Yes actually." You pull your gun from its holster and at the same time two huge men burst into the room and lunge at you. You manage to shoot one and he drops to the ground but the other made it to you before you could stop him. He lands a punch so forceful you hear your cheekbone crack. It disorients you so much you don't notice him grabbing you at first and when you do realise its too late as he has you held tightly to him with an arm around your waist trapping you hands by your sides and the other arm round your neck choking you slightly.

"Richter warned me you'd be paying me a visit, I was shocked to be contacted by him, you must've really pissed him off for him to side with me."

"I wouldn't be hasty to take his side, unless you want to end up like him."

"Yeah? And how has he ended up?"

"Dead." You smile through the throbbing in your cheek as he moves his face closer to yours.

"I'm giving you a chance here, I'll let you walk off unharmed if you beg for your life... and transfer everything you're worth over to me. You can run away to go hide in a hole somewhere and be thankful everyday for the rest of your life for my mercy." You chuckle at the man before you as you realise he is so similar to Richter, never misses an opportunity to assert his dominance over a woman and a complete pussy that can't do a job properly. He didn't even give you a chance to fear for your life before he offered you a chance to live, he doesn't understand the game the way you do, doesn't enjoy it like you, you like to play with your victims before you end them and he's making this no fun at all. The gutlessness of it all disgusts you, no one is ever willing to do what needs to be done and that's why you rose to the top so quick, that's why you'd rather die than beg this pathetic man for your life, you'll do what has to be done to die the way you lived.

"I'm not begging for shit." You spit in his face and he falls back yelling at your grotesque action. He wipes his face and storms back over to you so there is barely any space between your faces, his breath smells of cigars and bourbon, a smell you had grown familiar with after all these years that still never failed to make your nose scrunch up. A menacing smile grows on his face as he utters the words:

"I am going to enjoy killing you so much. Everything you have is mine now, sweetheart."

As he finishes his sentence he nods at the man holding you, you hear a shuffle behind you as his grip around your neck disappears for a moment, you keep eye contact with the victorious looking man in front of you until you feel a cold, solid object being slammed into your temple. The ringing in your ears starts immediately as does the spinning in your vision, your legs shake and everything around you turns sideways and rushes upwards. You don't realise you're falling to the floor until you hit it, the last thing you see before your vision goes black is the huge man standing over you clutching a brick spattered with blood in his hand.

psa: sorry this chapter is a little shorter but pt.20 will make up for it (i hope), finale next! Can't believe I've actually made it this close to finishing the story, i have never stuck with anything creative enough to finish it so this is crazy to me

[submissivegayfrenchboy2]

Rank these scenarios from which one you would love the most to which one you would love the least.

A) You are cuddling in the couch with Aaron Taylor Johnson, he is incredibly gassy and farting under the covers, warming up both of your bodies

B) You are on a date with Anthony Mackie, it's going well and out of nowhere he asks you to go to the bathroom to make you worship his muscles

C) You are a butler for Michael B Jordan, you must have everything ready for him, put his shoes on for him and and massage his feet nightly

D) You are the lover of Adil Rami, but he has terrible gas and you have to continuously endure his large burps and fart

E) You run into Carlos Sainz at the restroom of a formula 1 race, you get to listen to him fart and burp as he pisses

07 / 01 / 2025

Game with celebrities

It is way too difficult! I want to live everything! How am I supposed to chose a scenario that is the best or the worst? They are all soooooo exciting!!!! 🥵 I want to marry and/or have sex with all these alpha male celebs! And thanks for including Black men!

It may sounds weird but if I had to rank my preferences in order to the one i want the most to the one i want the least, it would be as you classified them when you did your question. Understand me well : I loved all of them 😁

A : being the lover of Aaron Taylor-Johnson is already perfect, so he can do absolutely anything he wants to me. If it's farting on me, then do it 😍

B : I'm in love with Anthony Mackie so if I chosed to rank this erotic plot in second it's because it takes place in the toilets

C : you know that I am a whiteboi addicted to Black supremacy so obviously being owned by a Black man as godly as Michael B. Jordan, and being a butler being my dream job, I would dedicate my life to his service 🙏🏻

D : Adil Rami is a gassy god and I'd love to be married to him. Why I put him here? Maybe because I loved the others men more or because the gif you chosed didn't turned me on...

E : Carlos Sainz is a god, but listening to him farting isn't exciting. However, eating his turds or smelling his ass, now that's something I'd love to experience!

Aaron Taylor-Johnson

I have said why I would love to smell Aaron Taylor-Johnson's farts here

you'll find the link of the story where he farts a lot :

Michael B. Jordan

Here is my story where there is several moments of farts, domination, humiliation :

I've explained here why I love him :

Anthony Mackie

You'll find in this article I wrote about him at the 82th Golden Globes Ceremony 2025 links of articles about why I love him so much

Adil Rami

Here is the link of the love story I wrote about Adil Rami and there is gassy scenes :

And here is the link of my previous game about him, you can still answer the question :

Carlos Sainz

@carlossainzbutthole @aarontaylorjohnsonfans @anthonymackiesource @adilramifc-blog @michaelbjordan @adil-rami-fans @anthonymackienet @aarontjsource @carlossainzsource-blog @adilrami @aarontveitisonfire @anthonymackiesworld

[inchidentally]

I love love love your landoscar (and carlando and dando) deep dives and analysis and in one of them you mentioned how Carlos acts very differently with Charles than he does with Lando and that charlos is its own different topic so I was wondering about your thoughts on their dynamic👀 Would love to read them but no pressure of course!

(these asks are literally from last year and I am soso soooo sorry for taking so long <3<3)

god anon I love all three too even if the multishipping thing is wayyy too uncommon for me to do it out here publicly on my blog anymore!

truly - and this is fully rpf projecting switched off - the Charles/Carlos and Carlos/Lando dynamics are so different and it was so sweet during the Melbourne 2024 celebrations watching Carlos switching between the two aslfhsalfh. bc Carlos literally helped raise Lando from the kid Lando's closest friends and even Zak described as a loner and intensely shy, to someone who could borrow quite a lot from Carlos' persona for himself and even learned a social hobby in golf to integrate him more with other drivers. it's not as 'sweet' per se but even the fact that Lando a while ago was like 'oh I only date Spanish girls' during that golf stream bc Carlos literally helped Lando meet girls (this was before Luisa). straight up he functioned as Lando's F1 and PR social lifeline in a way where Lando was still pretty clingy even up to like late 2022? bc Daniel was another great big alpha personality to do a lot of the heavy lifting like Carlos did but Lando and Daniel are more of a friendship of equals.

but for Carlos, Lando's mostly stayed in that little brother position - even moreso I'd say as Carlos approaches 30 bc his lifestyle now is way more grown-up than Lando's and his approach to his career and racing is vaaaastly different to Lando's. and tbh it's one of many reasons I was glad they didn't stay teammates bc regardless of what fans wanted and PR pushed, that would either not have ended well or it would have had truly excruciating moments (similar to that 'breakup' moment in 2022). I think ultimately they'd always have ended up ok but it's good to not have had to wait and find out how.

I genuinely think it'll only be in retrospect that people learn to appreciate how impressive and cohesive Carlos and Charles' partnership has been bc I only ever see a few people say this. and again, ignoring the whole PR bromance aspect of it, this is in how they have weathered the absolute WORST of everything that could be thrown at a pairing and always come out unified. their fanbases have been at bloody war since day one, the Tifosi have been embroiled in civil war, their own families use multiple platforms to stir up enmity, Ferrari's Borgia-esque culture has directly and indirectly worked to disrupt communication and good will between the two garages. team orders has been Russian roulette every race. the literal racing gods seem to roll the dice when it comes to which of them will be favored and who will be left burning with anger. and even when both suffer equally due to the many forces outside their control, guaranteed everyone but themselves will be trying to somehow pin blame on the other.

a tiny fraction of this amount of drama has been enough to destroy partnerships plenty of times in racing history and even throughout their time as teammates.

AND YET !! every hasty word or outburst is smoothed over within hours or even minutes!

bc the common aortic valve they've mutually decided to share between them has stayed strong, vital and healthy. I cannot wait for their biographies or a docu series bc the amount of obvious communication going on between them fully behind the scenes from absolutely everyone is the only reason they haven't both been locked in a br0cedes degree battle royale. absolutely no one but themselves has wanted them to be harmonious.

and when the most shocking headline probably for a decade happened, they decided the very day after being told (in advance of the public what would turn out to be just a few days) to drive together to Maranello and sign autographs and have photos taken of them in Carlos' car. the rest of us only found out later when the rumors were confirmed that this was a hugely symbolic display of solidarity.

even their intense and fun physicality, when you take the gay chicken aspect of it away, remains in the form of physically finding warmth and steadiness in each other as the only two people who can relate in full detail to the other. they're both your typical super physical European guys with other guys, but even when they're not horsing around there is a comfort and ease in being able to lean close or clap a hand on a shoulder and share closed-eyes embraces.

and that's why Melbourne was a Charles and Carlos affair with little Lando along for it getting his hugs and paternal kisses. when Carlos and Lando looked at each other it was right back to that chummy mischief sparkle in the eye thing they've always had. Lando still inhabits the rosy world of possibility and cresting the height of his career and a vastly different new teammate who is playing a part in that. but when Charles ran over for a private celebration before Carlos had even gotten out of his car - and when they sat together in the cool down room like two bone-weary parents watching TV while Lando buzzed about - and would turn to each other on the podium and lock eyes, it's bc they both get it in exactly the same way. Carlos faces uncertainty but opportunity, Charles faces uncertainty but certain difficulty. all of which was paralleled in Monaco for Charles' win. elation is mixed with grim satisfaction as much as joy.

the relief, the exhaustion, the bitterness of years without the WDC and the long stretches between wins in the back of the throat mixing with the champagne, even their tears of joy this season mixing with the fact that both of them have had tears in their eyes when asked about the end of their partnership - even down to the parallel in each if their wins this year of having a McLaren rugrat scurrying around the edge of drama neither of their pretty young heads has ever experienced even by proximity - both boys already assured by contract and by their performance of steadiness for years to come. the gold of their feelings on podiums hasn't tarnished or worn yet.

as always, the reality of these guys' actual friendships is rarely known until well after retirement. but the fact that Carlos and Charles held something so strong between them that made them reject the much easier option of simply hating each other or just neutrally existing in separate spheres (like so many other partnerships have done) means that mutual respect or mutual agreement or sympathetic personalities - or all three - was their choice, even if it's made their own careers and lives far more complicated and difficult.

[perspectivestarters]

Perspective's Sentence Starters; The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess by Chappell Roan (Part II)

MY KINK IS KARMA

We broke up on a Tuesday.

Who knew that we'd let it get this bad when it ended.

Karma's real.

Hope it's your turn.

I heard from *Name*, you're losing it lately.

It's hot when you have a meltdown.

It's hot when you're drinking downtown.

You're getting called out 'cause you're running your mouth.

It's coming around.

People say I'm jealous but my kink is watching you ruining your life.

People say I'm jealous but my kink is karma.

Wishing you the best, in the worst way.

Using your distress as foreplay.

Six months since April and I'm doing better.

No need to be hateful in your fake Gucci sweater.

It's hot when you're going through hell.

I'm feeling myself.

It's hot when you know that you're caught and you're getting pissed off.

It's getting me off.

PICTURE YOU

Draw the blinds.

Slip off my pretty dress down my chest.

It's ritualistic.

Counting lipstick stains where you should be.

I need you around.

I'm getting close now.

Do you picture me like I picture you?

Am I in the frame from your point of view?

Do you feel the same?

I'm too scared to say half of the things I do when I picture you.

So, tell me now all your perversions.

KALEIDOSCOPE

Here we go again.

Everything is fine.

I guess we could pretend we didn't cross a line.

Ever since that day, everything has changed.

The way I write your name

If you really wanna leave, I'll never make you stay.

Whatever you decide, I will understand.

It will all be fine.

Love is a kaleidoscope.

How it works, I'll never know.

It's somehow all the same

It's beautiful somehow.

It's never just a shape alone.

Well, I'd love to see them try.

There's no one else who could.

The only one is you.

If you change your mind, I will understand.

It'll just take time to go back to being friends.

Don't be afraid to hold it close.

PINK PONY CLUB

I know you wanted me to stay.

I can't ignore the crazy visions of me in *Place*.

I heard that there's a special place where boys and girls can all be queens every single day.

I'm having wicked dreams of leaving.

I swear it's calling me.

Won't make my mama proud.

It's gonna cause a scene.

I know she's gonna scream.

God, what have you done?

I'm just having fun.

It's where I belong.

I'm gonna keep on dancing.

Every night's another reason why I left it all.

I thank my wicked dreams.

You've been too good to me.

Don't think I've left you all behind.

You're always on my mind.

I can hear your southern drawl a thousand miles away.

NAKED IN MANHATTAN

I know you just landed.

I know you're probably busy but I would love to see you.

Call me when you can.

I'll never cross the line.

I pushed you down a million times.

I'd love if you knew you were on my mind.

Boys suck and girls I've never tried.

We both know we're getting drunk tonight.

Touch me, baby.

Put your lips on mine

Could go to hell but we'll probably be fine.

I know you want it.

You can have it.

I've never done it.

Let's make it cinematic

I wanna know, baby, what is it like?

An inch away from more than just friends.

If I don't try, then it's my loss.

Won't you fucking touch me?

I just want to touch you.

I want all of your love.

CALIFORNIA

I stretched myself across four states.

I trade amber clay roads for the sea foam and the endless sun rays.

I was never told that I wasn't gonna get the things I want the most.

If it hasn't happened yet, then maybe you should go.

Come get me out.

Thought I'd be cool in here.

I'd make you proud

To think I almost had it going, but I let you down.

Too hard to find reasons to stay.

GUILTY PLEASURES

Learned it on the internet.

Wild thoughts that make me melt.

Sometimes I scare myself.

I can't help what I can't help.

So shame on me, and shame on you.

I fantasize what we would do.

How would it taste?

Some good girls do bad things too.

I want this like a cigarette.

Can we drag it out and never quit?

Oh my god, you are heaven sent.

You give me guilty plеasure.

You're a pothead.

You're a cinephile.

It's been awhile since you turned up the dial.

[cult-of-the-eye]

If you had to kill one archivas assistant, who would you pick?

Oh my god this is the worst question in the entire fucking world wow!!! I love all of them!!!!

But I'm gonna answer it from a potential for Angst kinda way and which one I'd find the most interesting.

Sasha

Well first things first she did die but we're ignoring that for the sake of this question

If everyone realised she died directly after the Jane Prentiss Attack i think it would eliminate the added layer of guilt of not noticing her being taken by the Not Them and maybe allow them each to grieve a bit more? I think if they were smacked in the face with Sasha's death, then they could communally grieve before Tim got massively resentful and maybe Jon would be distracted by the grief to fall into his paranoia as intensely and actually try to support Tim instead. I guess it's a sad world where we're choosing between one type of death for Sasha and another but here we are.

Tim:

I know that hes gonna die but I haven't gotten there yet so I'm gonna imagine what would happen if he died in the Jane Prentiss Attack instead of Sasha. Sasha wouldn't have the same resentment and fury that Tim has, I feel like she'd would be determined to avenge Tim, I think she'd be a better protagonist than Jon, which would cause him extra Jon Guilt cause he'd be like why am I the leader of this whole thing Sasha would've been so much better than meeee and Sasha would eventually be like yeah bitch get out of my way. Sasha being alive would actually solve so many problems like actually. RIP Tim though, everyone would mourn his bisexual ass. Jon and Martin would grieve him normally and Sasha might make them go to therapy/talk to someone about it.

Martin:

If he died during the Prentiss Attack, he'd come back as a ghost. There's no other option, that's just what has to happen. Maybe it would be a chance for slight humour, cause Jon resolutely believed he's hallucinating for an embarrassingly long time before Martin's like nah bro...im a ghost. And he keeps Martin's reappearance to himself cause he wants something good for himself that no one can take away and they get closer and fall in love and everything but there's the added angst that he's a literal fucking ghost. The whole Peter Lukas arc is him slowly fading away as a ghost and Jon nearly kills himself to bring him back. In the end he does stab himself but he feels Martin push the knife in when he dies and he dies knowing that he'll join him.

Or alternatively, he's just gone. Jon would spiral with guilt and anxiety knowing that his last conversation with him doesn't excuse his poor treatment of him and that he died getting cut off from the others in the tunnels, he died scared and alone and worse, he died with the little bit of hope that things might get better. Tim and Sasha would both be devastated, they'd stare out at his empty desk and lash out with anger and fear and cry but in the end at least have each other to lean on. But Jon would be alone in his office with no one to give him tea. His physical health spirals and everyone's worried about him, the way Sasha and Tim have stuck together makes him even more paranoid that they somehow killed Gertrude together and no matter how soft with him they are, he still barrells towards the end with an even stronger need to martyr himself. It's bleak guys. My man is not ok.

So I guess if I could kill one of them off, I'd probably go for Tim's death cause Sasha being a better horror protagonist than Jon is actually so funny to me I think that would be so interesting but Ghost!Martin as a close second cause that would actually add so much depth.

Thank you for your ask!! I really enjoyed answering it!!

[y2ksnowglobe]

Deep appreciation for episode 30 (Van on the Run)

This is a long post where I just ramble on all the moments that make me love this episode.

The dethroning of fleshlight tag as the worst thing that anyone ever said.

The "Hey Andrew" story

Big old butt crack down the middle of the orb

Terry Jr. asking why Ron isn't wearing pants

"I'd better write that down as a note. Terry Jr., easy to lie to."

Lark literally taking a note about how unpaid interns die sometimes. (This turns into my firm belief that Mae Hailes is a paid intern)

Ron insisting Paeden is his half-brother. "My dad is my dad too!"

just gonna weep and tear my hair out real quick over that one.

Ron's insights on the patriarchy

"My stepson is here, and I am looking at him in the eye right now and it's not weird at all. It's not weird. We're just making eye contact right here." "It's a little weird. You have not blinked in several minutes." "Now it hurts to blink, so I'm not going to ever…" "That's not how it works. You have to blink." "No. It's like my eyes are getting…" "Dad, blink." Like what a way to start normalizing Terry Jr. calling Ron "Dad"

Sparrow's stealth hug

Just...starting to really see the dead inside Grant is both heartbreaking and really funny.

Nick's shaky fist bump makes me wanna cry.

I am always there for a good low perception roll joke.

Reveal that Ron just carries to lure that killed Willy around with him.

"Yeah! Your dad is George Washington!"

THEORY TIME: Like this episode is where we get most of our information about the kids' time in Ravenloft, and like...I don't buy it. Looking at how the kids phrase things, I've been solidly convinced that the O-Dads have Geas'ed the hell out of these kids so they can't give any specific details about what was done to them, but I feel like there's a loophole where they can talk about things that weren't done. So, for example: Nick specifies that Bill ignored him. I'll keep coming back to this as we keep going.

Weird detail: Darryl is with Glenn on the murder Henry's dad train at the start.

God I love to hate Barry Oak so much, he makes me skin crawl and he is in top form in this episode.

"I AM DRIVING WITH MY FRIENDS, FATHER! I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER!" It's such a teenager-y thing to say and I feel like it really gives a snapshot into what their relationship was like back in the day.

I really wanna get a snapshot into Nick's mind as he hears his dad completely lose his cool about Barry. Like, my boy did such a good job trying to act unbothered and brave, and then Glenn just is deeply and visibly upset about Barry almost killing him (which is valid, I just feel like it's a new experience for Nick)

Lark and Sparrow jumping in to drive when Henry lets go of the wheel. Like, not sure what happened with Sparrow, but Lark has been an epic driver from the get-go.

ANOTHER THEORY: Sparrow is really interesting in this episode. He willingly covers his ears when asked by Henry, and he's the one who hits the brakes when Henry tells them to stop the car. He's also just weirdly chill and forgiving, and like...I do not buy this as love wolf shit, he is clearly under some kind of magical influence to make him more compliant. You do not get the Sparrow that looks scared in the drone footage in episode 28 to this remarkably chill and forgiving kid without magical interference.

Freddie putting his foot down that Glenn would not mess with firearms while drunk

Barry's "Oh kakaw kakaw" when he's shot is probably in my top ten vocal stims from this show.

Lark enthusiastically supporting Glenn shooting Barry makes me so happy

Henry going from trying to be firm and calm as Glenn loses his shit, and immediately shifting to "ooooh, I hate you so much" as soon as Barry starts talking to him is so funny. Just all the ideals fly out the window.

Find it super interesting how Henry cites "respecting his choices" as a thing here considering what happens later on with the bracelets.

I both do and don't want to know if Anthony already had the idea for the Lark and Sparrow homunculi when Barry offers letting Henry take his kids and run and giving up all the other kids. Like regardless of whether or not it was planned, I do love the idea that Barry is giving this offer because he knows he's got the real ones tucked back in Oakvale.

I love the word abscond, okay?

Love Barry framing his failure as a father as disappointment in Henry's choices. I want to kick him in the face.

Mr. Mustache calling Ron "Honey"

"No. You just exasperatedly asked why a bunch of times. A.k.a. the Henry Oak special."

Geas theory follow up: Lark telling them they forgot to feed them fits into the loophole of being something the granddads didn't do, so they're allowed to mention it. Also this part of starting to hint at what exactly went down is so just *chefs kiss.*

Freddie's "WHY?" When Matt asks if Darryl can perceive that Ron peed his pants.

Freddie being told the charm needs to be in an enclosed space and immediately going "What if we had an umbrella?"

Freddie picking the first audio result for Fantasy Tavern for the sound.

"Bring us your hottest moms!"

This next bit always slays me and I don't even know why:

The jokes about the level one adventurer group is beautiful. I hope things turned out okay for that fighter and four rogues.

Henry making up Mr. X only for Mr. X to be real.

Ron thoroughly describing the fake voice he's going to do, only to reveal it's just his normal voice.

Ron's whole exchange with the other rogues.

Henry describing Glenn's fantasy voice as Italian

Anthony trying to keep up with what the crew are trying to do as they're attempting to get a room.

Also, everything is in shillings now for no adequately explained reason?

The random bar patrons who are gonna be so disappointed when they make it to the other side of town to find out that Hi I'm Ron is not playing.

The start of the NPCs realizing they could have asked for more money gag.

Glenn almost going to see what's up with Mr. X but then getting bored.

Anthony doing a C3P0 impression

Geas Theory update: Grant phrases it as "they weren't nice" and the most detail we get from Grant is that "Willy's really mean" only for him to then say, "It was fine, I guess." Terry tops out at saying that Willy "shouted at them a fair number of times" and that's as intense as any of their descriptions get. Like this is sus as heck. Especially since at minimum, we know that Lark and Sparrow got homunclui'd and that somehow, Barry got the twins to sit quietly. The boys are underselling this and the only one that would be in character for would be like...Nick (who we already saw was super shaky). Darryl even prompts Grant saying it's okay if it was rough and they were scared and we still get no further information.

Ron's scary story is so good for so many reasons. Like the way he tries to make it spookier by making Willy a man with a fishingpole for an arm, by calling fish "food that breathes underwater" like that mixed with the realization that he's telling the story of how Willy died is just...an excellent combo of scary and not scary and it's just a baffling bunch of weird that is pure Ron.

Terry being baffled by Ron asking if they want to sing Rock-a-bye Baby, only for it to turn out Ron doesn't know the words.

"You find more knives than not knife in his pants."

The fact that Lark was smuggling knives for a breakout attempt is just so lovely, go off my murderous little weirdo.

Also seeing Henry taking weapons from his kids knowing where this ends up is just (collapses into a ball of sad)

Henry deflecting from the werewolf questions by just switching to the topic of puberty, only for Sparrow to be too receptive to wanting to learn.

Darryl overhearing Paeden saying that Grant's dad is cool only for Grant to not say anything in response.

"Did Ron kill his dad?"

Seeing Darryl be actually upset about the fact that he's the only one who'd want to see his dad, but his dad's not there. And seeing Darryl actually grapple with the idea that he doesn't understand Glenn, Henry, and Ron's relationships with their dads, and like the weird feeling of not being able to relate being isolating, but still realizing it's an isolation you should be thankful for.

Ghost football ft. George Washington and one of his slaves

"Dude, that was the entire snarling id of the American masculine psyche in one image…It was like football, George Washington, your dad, and the Sword of Damocles that is slavery."

Glenn in the dream space

Bill Close calling Glenn tiger is just like such a small detail but it's like one of those moments that we really can actually see him being a dad, I think?

The gut punch of "Do you love me?" and "You wake up." like God DAMN!!!!!

Like this episode is such a buffet of character dynamics, and jokes, and lore, and room for theories, and I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!!! WHY DID IT TAKE ME SO LONG TO REALIZE IT'S MY FAVORITE????????

[narrators-journal]

Chapter 4

Ngl, this one might be a tad rushed. I was originally gonna make this longer, but I found a good spot to end it that served the flow better so it didn’t drag and get painfully slow. So, it’s shorter than intended, but you get an extra chapter lololol. Hope you enjoy!

Previous part: Here

Next part: Here

Masterlist: Here

Despite the weight of his mother that lingered in his skull, Ryoji made his way back to class to drop himself into his chair and lay his head down. “I’m hurt that you’ve been so warped by that disgusting human that you’d refuse my help.” His mother whispered in his head. The weight of her hands still on the back of his shoulders while he muttered back. You don’t want to help, you only want to possess my body. “That is not true, my child.” She assured, "I do not only want to use you; but I don't have much of a choice." Yet, the brunette didn't respond to her that time. His annoyance furthered when he felt someone tug at his scarf.

Another one was quick to follow, though. Until the brunette finally raised his head and looked over to the culprit. Only to find that Junpei had moved from his desk to the one behind him. “Hey dude, you doing okay?” The persona user asked, and Ryoji nodded without a word. “You sure? I heard from Kenji that Minato carried you back inside yesterday, you good today?” and as he spoke, he kept hold of the brunette's long, sun-colored scarf, his curious, brown eyes all but a crowbar to Ryoji's mouth. “Oh, yeah I’m fine now." He promised, the false joy in his words too easy to summon. "I was sick is all, and yesterday was the worst of it. But! I’m better now, so that was just the illness breaking or something. Uh, how have you been though? I heard...I heard some rumors that you’ve been a bit off yourself, y'know.” He asked in return. And, in that instant, the baseball-clad brunette’s expression darkened. “Oh. Yeah. I have been kinda struggling recently…” he confirmed. His brown eyes as dark as mud while he stared off into the space just over Ryoji’s shoulder before he recovered. “But! I’m doing a bit better, it was a personal issue but I’m getting through it.” Junpei assured with the best smile he could muster. Though, he was swift to change topics after a heartbeat.

God that was an asshole tactic to pull. I didn't need to jab into Chidori's death like that. He scolded himself while Junpei told him about the most recent sports scores. At least, until the next lesson started and the persona user had to return to his seat before he got scolded. And, thankfully, Ryoji was somewhat left alone by his classmates for the rest of the morning.

Even when Minato returned to class from the break, he left Ryoji to his own devices. Which, was a small bit of cold comfort against the presence that haunted his skull still. Though, once the bell rang to release them to lunch, Minato became the brunette's shadow. And while he didn’t say anything during their walk, his presence alone weighed on Ryoji.

God, if this had happened before that cursed night, I'd love this. Ryoji thought when he sat at a table with his shadow and watched the other students talk and joke around them. What am I supposed to do now though? I can't flirt with him anymore, it'd be completely fake. At the same time, though, I can't outright ask him 'hey, if you had to kill me to save humanity, would you choose humanity or me?' That'd only tip him off and get me cornered. Then what? If I told him the truth, he'd hate me! He'd choose to try and stop Nyx if I let him!

"-Heya you two, hope I’m not destroying a lunch date.” Kenji joked as he plopped himself across from Ryoji and yanked him out of his thoughts. “Oh...you’re not,” Ryoji assured. Hit with the stomach-churning scent of the day's attempt at fried rice as he spoke. Not that the food smelled disgusting, though, it smelled fine to him as Kenji began to talk their ears off. There was simply something about the smell of food that had the brunette's stomach on the verge of revolt. If, of course, there was anything in him to start.

The milf-obsessed brunette talked without a care to the duo's silence after that. After all, he'd been Minato's friend first, and had gotten used to his low conversation interest. So, Ryoji somewhat tuned the boy out in favor of a study of Minato's hands.

With chipped black nail polish and callouses on his palms, it was clear that the midnight-haired teen had trained hard. Yet, the nocturnal nature of his mission was most evident in the paleness of Mina's skin, and the bags under his eyes. There was no mistake, the Dark Hour had already drained the wildcard enough for one lifetime. I already took his sleep, then Aigis. I don't need to ruin his life further… In contrast, Ryoji’s own hands looked pale and emaciated now, with hair-thin threads of black mold just beneath the skin. Almost as if the days he’d spent in pain in bed had sapped away his life force and left him to rot like Kenji had joked. His fingers were boney, skeletal. He could almost swear that he could see his veins beneath his skin of his palm when he turned his hand over. No, they were no longer his hands. The hands he looked down on as Kenji talked about homework and Minato slept were the hands of Death.

No! No, stop thinking about it! Ryoji scolded himself while he squeezed his eyes shut. Do NOT spiral in school. If I have some existential melt down here, Minato will get suspicious. He’ll pry into me until I crack! No. No, no, no. Stop focusing on it. He told himself, only to jump when the wildcard finally spoke once again. “Are you sure you’re okay? You look like you’re in pain.” He hummed, and Ryoji had to force open his eyes to look into Minato’s storm cloud eyes with a smile. “Of course, funeral lily. I’m not in pain.” “Are you going to be sick, then? I can get you a trashcan if so.” Kenji offered through a mouthful of rice, but Ryoji’s hand shot out to grab the teen’s wrist before he could get to his feet. “No! I’m not going to be sick either, please trust me when I say I’m fine.” He plead, internally wincing at how desperate he sounded, even to himself. “L-look,” he tried, in a far more relaxed tone as he kept a vice-like grip on Kenji to pull him back into his seat, “I’m not in pain and I’m not sick. I’m just...thinking about some family stuff, okay? It’s not a fun train of thought.” “Oh…” The milf-hunter-wannabe said, his tone softened by the experience he had with his own family troubles. After all, he was a wealthy young adult, there was no doubt in Ryoji’s mind that he understood the pains that could be caused by his false homelife. “Well...is it anything you’d like to talk about? I can’t help, but me and Mina can listen.” He offered, but the taller brunette finally released his wrist to wave his offer off without a glance at the wildcard beside him. “Maybe later, the context of the whole drama would take far too long to break down right now. Just, know that I’m fine. Simply thinking about stuff.”

Kenji gave an understanding nod and changed the subject without further question, but the shadow knew better than to give the wildcard a glance to read into. The last thing he needed right then was for Minato to know how to read him the same way that he could the persona user. So, instead, he kept his focus on the chatty teen across from them for the remainder of the lunch period, and when the bell finally rang, he didn’t say a word to Minato as they made their way back to class.

Though, that didn’t keep Minato from talking this time. “So, do you plan on returning to work anytime soon?” “Dunno, do I even have a job at this point?” Ryoji chuckled as he weaved through the stream of students. “Oh yeah, I guess you should ask before you come in, huh? It’d be pretty fucking awkward if you came in expecting to work and were fired.” He hummed, quick to grab onto the brunette’s suspender so that he couldn’t be swept away or left behind in the crowd. “Well then, I guess the question is, do you plan to check if you have a job still?” “Honestly? I might not,” the brunette shrugged nonchalantly as he spoke, though he could feel the glare that response got him. “You should. You said you’d help me pay off that businessman, remember?” Minato huffed, which made Ryoji snort, “Y’know, I could just give you the money you still need for that-”

The abrupt stop he was forced into told him he’d fucked up even before he met the thunderous glare. The anger and hurt that mixed in those dark clouds sure to leave lichtenburg figures in his skin, but when the brunette tried to correct himself, the wildcard shoved him aside and pushed ahead to get to class. And, for the third or fourth time that day, he couldn’t recall, Ryoji felt himself slip into that dark headspace. But, that time, it stemmed from a deep thorn of pain that sat stubbornly in his chest. Not the sickly pale color of his skin, or the weight of his mother in the back of his mind.

Though, those factors were of no help to him while he stood in the hall and let the chatter of the student body pass him by. One glance at his palms seemed to ensure that, as he watched the darkness that he’d assumed were his veins spread like a spider’s thread over his pale skin for what felt like an hour. The world seemingly at a stand still as he watched in icy horror as ink inched its way over his flesh.

Thankfully, he was snapped out of the moment when Junpei bumped into him and reminded him of the many, many students that trickled into classrooms around him. Every single one of them unaware of the monster that numbly followed the class clown back to his desk with his fists clenched and an iceberg in his gut.

[devotion-that-corrupts]

10 Characters / 10 Fandoms / 10 Tags

pick 10 characters from 10 fandoms and tag 10 people. thank you for tagging me @ithinkthiswasabadidea :)

apparently you don't have to comment on them. HOWEVER, i love talking about my interests, and you've given me an excuse to do it, so let's go!

(not in any particular order, i love them all.)

constantin d'orsay (greedfall) baby boy. has done nothing wrong ever in his entire life. seeing him activates my knight instinct. i would fight lord and lady d'orsay for him. i would fight the high king guy for him. i would fight god for him. if he is wrong i would reshape reality to make him right. all of this to say, i love him a normal amount.

viego (league of legends / ruination / runeterra) if i had a nickel for every time a character i love was born a second son of a ruler and so was never intended to lead, yet became an heir after his brother's death, was supposed to die because of poison, had only one person he cared about deeply, in something between eternal love and obsession caused immense destruction for the sake of that person (who has never asked for any of this), had some sort of transformation during which his hair turned from fair/blond to platinum, his eye color changed, and there appeared some weird magic-related thing on his head symbolizing his becoming a villain (or, rather, making it clear that he was wrong all along), then i'd have two nickels. which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice. ok, now for a more normal explanation. bringing your kingdom & then entire realm to ruin for your wife? in grief, in hopeless attempt to revive her? i love this! i love it when love turns people evil.

camilla hect (the locked tomb) i don't have coherent thoughts about her. i simply adore her with my whole heart. here's to camilla hect, yet another of devotion's casualties!!!

gale dekarios aka gale of waterdeep (baldur's gate 3) i will kill mystra.

gabrielle de lioncourt (the vampire chronicles) there is much to analyze about her background and her relationships, esp with lestat, and i am most definitely unfit for this. let me just say that if i were a vampire, i would also ditch humanity and explore some jungle instead. and probably wear men's clothes.

millions knives (trigun) unhinged codependent siblings… <3

fang runin (the poppy war) my darling girl who fell in love with the war, and nobody told her it ended. i think she should get to burn the world down, as a treat.

breezepelt (warrior cats) i am including him because he is my og blorbo. 10-year old me really looked at the worst guy ever and said yeah that's the one. my love for writing about dysfunctional families and defying religion could probably be traced back to him.

constance blackwood (we have always lived in the castle) i NEED to teleport into the world of this book and ask constance her perspective. because she knew it, i mean, she knew what must have actually happened the whole time. i wonder what she felt after the accident, and if/how her view changed since then. i wonder what she thought of her parents, and of merricat, and of the life they came to lead. we get some of it from the dialogue and interactions ofc, but it doesn't stop me from contemplating all of this.

august (the wicker king) guard dog of a boy. 'I like following him. Following orders. Doing whatever he wants.' 'I’m always going to want to be at your heels, fighting for you. Hurting myself because you tell me to.' i hope belonging to someone else brings him peace.

anyways, i had to open the book to find these quotes, and now i want to reread it all over again. let me just tag some mutuals and then i'm gonna go read.

(no pressure!) (also you don't have to elaborate on them) @kuramirocket @grin-unsettling @boygirltwins @fairylightfairlybright @drizzit @msnormandy @darkvisionvamp @gardenbastard @cjflint @pups-2-dust & anyone else who wants to :)

[waitmyturtles]

BL/QL Ask Game : The Ugly, the Bad and the Worst

Thanks so much to my fellow Only Friends Ephemerality Squad compatriot, @clara-maybe-ontheroad, for the tag on this FASCINATING tag game! I will admit: I don't think I've seen quite enough BLs to have a strong opinion for a lot of these questions -- so I will answer those that I can. (And here's a link to the original post with all of the questions listed!) Of course, many of the shows I'll reference below came from the Old GMMTV Challenge, so I'm focusing on Thailand here!

Worst soundtrack / weirdest song choice in a BL --> I cannot STAND the original SOTUS theme song. It was actually a kind of perfect theme song for the early-college-years setting that SOTUS was situated in, but -- oh god, I had to FF it every time it came on.

Most cringe-inducing line (cute) --> "Do you like to eat grilled fish?" --> Pharm, to Dean, at the AQUARIUM (Until We Meet Again) LOLLLLL

Most cringe-inducing line (actually bad) -->This isn't quite fair to Type, but when he says to Tharn, "The slap was nothing compared to what I did to her," and you hear that out of context, as I mistakenly did the first time I saw this particular scene, it just -- made me want to throw my computer out of a window. I'd say 95% of the lines in TharnType were bad cringe.

Most stupid decision made by a character --> For fucking Nan to get together with fucking Phu in The Promise. Nan, you were WAY TOO GOOD for Phu, and you should have gotten with Party. FUCK.

Worst plot line --> All of TharnType

The most problematic show you've watched --> All of TharnType

A show people love but you find bad --> TharnType?

A show people find bad but you will defend --> KinnPorsche. It was a cultural zeitgeist for a reason, and it's worth a defense for its symbolism in the scope of Thai BL

A show that is just objectively bad but you enjoyed it --> YYY, 100% bad show that I totally love

A bad show that you kept watching because you were intrigued/fascinated --> LOL, Dangerous Romance?

A bad show that you kept watching because you were horny --> DEFINITELY DANGEROUS ROMANCE

A bad show that you kept watching because of that one character --> UNFORTUNATELY THE PROMISE BECAUSE OF COFFEE DUDES, to which I am susceptible

A bad show that you would still recommend --> YYY, if people want to see critical commentary in an utterly BONKERS show

The character that ruined a show the most --> FUCKING PHU IN THE PROMISE

Most awful character that you hated --> Type, TharnType

Most awful character that you loved --> BOSTON.

A character that wasn't awful but that you just don't like --> Hmmmmmmm. I can't really think of one.... maayyyyybe Boss from 2gether? But that's not fair because I love Gunsmile. I dunno on this one!

A hero that should have been a villain --> SHOULD have been a villain... Dan from Not Me.

A morally bad character you're into --> Boston

A morally bad character you're not into and you wish people would stop being into --> That guy James from I Feel You Linger in the Air (Pat's shooter, get grazed motherlskfjlwker)

The show that disappointed you the most --> The Promise

The Worst Show of Them All Because of Your Own Reasons --> TharnType

I did it! TAGS! @solitaryandwandering @omarandjohnny @amerain-k @nieves-de-sugui @he-is-lightning-in-a-bottle @thatgirl4815 @invisiblegarters @clairificusrex @so-much-yet-to-learn @tm-trx and whoever else wants to join in!

[kindred-sims]

Caleb felt downright terrible.

It'd never been his intention for Henry to have heard any of those things he'd said, nor had he ever really meant to say them out loud. He liked to consider himself a private man when it came to these issues, but when he'd come back from town to find Henry gone and not tending to his chores, something inside of him had been ignited and he hadn't been able to stop himself from exploding.

He wasn't proud of himself for it, not for his choice of words, or for the way the way he'd harshly and loudly spoken to his wife. Far as he was concerned, you never raised your voice or your hand to a woman, his father had always been clear on telling him that.

But it was the fact that Henry had heard all of it that ate away at him the most.

He glanced up to Jo upon her entering the room, certain that nothing but a pain-filled grimace was on his face.

"....is he alright?" he asked, quietly.

"Alright as can be, I was able to convince him to come and eat something, at least," Jo sighed. "Oh Caleb, it was terrible. He was so certain that you hated him, I think he'd even convinced himself of it!"

"Oh God..." Caleb wilted, dropping his face into his hand. "Oh God, I never---I didn't mean any of those things, Jo, you know I didn't--I just wanted to know that he was taking his responsibilities seriously, that's all! He needs to, its important, I--"

He broke down, letting out a harsh, muffled sob.

"He needs to be prepared. I want to know the farm is going to be alright."

"Caleb, don't talk like that! You have a good many years ahead of you, you don't need to be worrying about these things right now--"

"Yes, I do! I'm the same age as he was, Jo!"

He'd done it. He'd shouted again, but he not out of anger this time. Instead, there was something more fearful in his voice, something that was terrified.

"...my father. He wasn't much younger than I am now when he died," he said. "I keep thinking about it, I can't stop...maybe that's why I got so angry earlier. It just...it kept replaying in my head, what if I'd gotten into an accident on the way home today, like he had? What if I'd been killed, and Henry wasn't ready? What if none of you were ready?"

Tender compassion flooded Jo's heart as she looked down upon her defeated husband, swearing to herself that she'd never seen once seen him look so broken before. He'd always been her anchor, the one to ground her in her worst moments, while he himself had bottled away the troubles in his own mind.

Oh, what a big heart he held. If it came down to sacrificing for the sake of the world, she knew he'd do it in a heartbeat.

Only that didn't mean she was willing to let him bear it alone.

"Oh, my love...we're all here, we're all safe. We have our health..." She reminded him, pulling him close to her as his body shuddered. "I doubt the Good Lord would let lightning strike in the same place twice, anyhow. Things will turn out right, you've always said they will."

He had. He'd always told her, from the minute they'd met. And she was going to keep believing so, no matter what.

[bitegore]

🍄♻️🤔

🍄Describe your wip/one of your wips in the format of “_ + =__”

okay for the sake of my fucking sanity i am NOT going to presume I get any real wiggle room here. or i will do another 400 line proof. because it is fun but oh my god it takes so long.

((Felyx + Taran)(Rex + Haven + Taran) + fake dating)^spite = fireworks

♻️A scrapped idea for your current WIP(s)

not sure it qualifies as a "wip" because I haven't actually decided to pull it out of the graveyard of abandoned-works out-of-progress yet - call it a wip-aspirational or something lol - but the more I poke at Haven and Taran's actual story the more fun I have thinking about siccing Rex on the two of them. In like 2020 or 2021, so, a good while ago at this point and at a time I'd describe myself as "rusty" I started working on whatever the worst version of a meetcute is (ending in the equation above) lol. If I recall correctly my endgame then was that the three of them would fall into a stable orbit. I think that's kind of silly now. They're not that kind of people.

other scrapped idea, same story: Rex and Taran were meant to get along. That's not happening. It's a lot funnier if Rex and Haven (both deeply, deeply difficult people to get along with who hate accommodating for other people) can find a way to coexist pleasantly but Taran, resident NormalGuy who is extremely accustomed to unpleasant asshole bullshit, genuinely cannot get over Rex's various fuckeries beyond, like, the civility of "I recognize that you are living in my house now because the other person who lives here really likes you, and I don't want to have a screaming match in my own fucking kitchen." I tend to make Rex tolerable to speak to when I write him on his own because it's narratively difficult to use a protagonist who will just spit anything handed to him in someone else's face, but in this particular setup he is actively attempting to get Taran's genuine actual hatred on purpose because he's under the impression that's the goal and he's having fun with it also, so it lets me just make him a huge cunt asshole too which is more fun than having him show any scraps of humanity anyway :D

ok let me come up with something you have actual interest in lol

The Rex & Casey conversation fic I was working on ran into an unrecoverable roadblock (I decided the premise needed work) and has to be restarted in a different place with a slightly different version of Casey (tragic!), so one of the things I had to scrap to keep it rolling is Rex commenting on the color of the sky. It's really sad for me because I always think it's funny when you have a guy In a hell dimension like "damn... this place is weird.... the sky isn't bright red, it's eerie". But I can't justify The Story bringing Rex into The Real World as a Plot Element now that I know more about how it works, so I

......

Aha. Well. Actually. I can't justify Alan using The Story to bring Rex into The Real World, because I know how he works. Might have fixed my opinion on my own premise.

We'll see, I'll sleep on it. It needs to cook longer anyway. I also realized (aw2 spoilers) (for serious) (skip this paragraph now if you havent at least finished the first run of the game) if it happens in The Story In The Real World it's got to be situated between Saga's first time going through the loop with Alan and the Final Draft, but I still haven't found enough time to watch t full playthrough of Final Draft, so I'm sure when I hit Zane's part in there and then endgame I'll know a bit more about the direction I want to take.

🤔What’s a story you’d love to write but haven’t even started yet

Anything like that I have, either it's so busy being a concept I cannot write it yet, or I've started it just to make sure I won't forget it XD so it's hard to come up with. And most of the concepts are less "this is the kind of story I want to write", so much as "this is the kind of effect I want it to have". You know. I want to write something ~mind-bending~ or I want to ~do talking animals but cool~ or whatever.

A lot of words to say I'm drawing a huge blank on this question.

I think - and this is something I keep approaching with different stories but not leaning into, because, frankly, I'm the first line of concept-check for myself, and i get bored - I'd really like to try a story that works as one extended record-scratch. You start at the very end, in a scene that means basically nothing to anyone, and then in the events of reading the entire rest of the story you get more and more context until the very end of the book is the exact same scene as the first part, like, down to the description, and then it just loops infinitely. Something you could read spiral-binding style so it doesn't really have a "start" or an "end", just points between chapters with cardboard so you can close it anywhere, if it's a physical book. you know, some experimental shit.

Unfortunately I find time loops boring as hell to write. This would be ONE loop, so it'd maybe be better, but I'm still kind of burnt on being willing to touch another timeloop from how badly I did not enjoy the one I wrote for an exchange like two full calendar years ago. And also I do have other things to be doing.

That's also not a story! That's a plot structure! I might as well say I want to write The Hero's Journey for all it really tells you 😂 at my heart I'm a parodist, I'm going to need to see someone do it wrong and decide to do a better job than they did to really get a fire lit for an actual narrative here. I do love me some themes of insurmountable stupid bullshit you put yourself into on purpose because you decided you could surmount it and then discovered you couldn't, and some futile attempts at some stupid shit for retroactively-really-dumb reasons that weren't worth it, so it'll have that. as seasoning. because what is a permanent stable timeloop but one person committing suicide over and over? I'm only really able to approach the properly frozen-in-sequence ones as either Hand Of God (boring) or Sunk Cost Fallacy On Steroids (fun! interesting! miserable in a slightly unusual way!) so...

....well, it's going to have to keep simmering, because I like what I've got in the broth, but there's no meat in there yet, only spices. It would make a terrible meal right now. But it answers the question, I think.