#gives me some serious whiplash every time i have to do a double take and figure out if it's one of THOSE red hats or just someone showing s

[sippakornj]

What I've got & been through: a JM310 reflection

What's the worst that could happen?

That was my thought over 60 kilometers away from where I was supposed to be at the time. It was the first class, and nothing ever really happened on the first day of class, right?

But as it turned out, a lot.

“You’re not coming? There are assignments,” a text message from a friend reads.

“Just wanted to let you know that the professor has a ton of assignments for us today,” another student wrote to me.

My first impression of the class is one that’s set from afar. I was constantly playing catch-ups with the class; student grouping, new chat and application to join, three homeworks assigned- one of them due the very same night. I remember going through the slides on my phone thinking, “this is a lot to take in.”

It was a genuine whiplash coming from the previous professor who was a bit more laid-back and made learning into a nice and comfortable atmosphere. This was different. It’s intense, strict, and nerve-racking. When I made it to the second class, the roll call started right before the clock struck 9.30 a.m. That’s when you know it’s serious.

I don’t have a problem with being on time, but it is a problem when I can’t seem to fall asleep ever since the mid-term period. It’s either a couple hours of sleep, or well into the double digits, no in between. It was a real struggle having to get up just about every time I was falling asleep. When Tuesdays ended, I almost always crashed at the foot of the bed the moment I’m at my place.

It was not all bad though. I got to work during the quiet hours of the night when I’m the most productive. Reading is something that I truly enjoyed. I like the idea of reading, but not as much as doing other things. So, it was nice having the necessary push for me to read something. The articles we had to read varied in quality in my opinion, and maybe that’s the point—finding the good and the bad.

Every piece that I had to read and write helps me in becoming a better writer which is the reason why I’m studying here in the first place. I could tell all that was taught in the class, but I can’t tell you exactly what I’ve learned from this class, except that I was able to grow from it—as a writer, a student, and a person. 

Working in a group has really put things into perspective. It showcased your strengths, but also exposed your weaknesses. For the first time, I had to accept that I cannot do everything alone, and that I needed help. I let things go and put faith in my teammates—most of whom I have never worked with prior to this. It took a few trials and errors, but we all eventually figured out the group dynamics. I adjusted. Sooner or later, we all have to. At least, that’s what our group did anyway. 

In the end, I’m really proud of the work that our group was able to accomplish even if the end result wasn’t exactly perfect. But there will always be another opportunity to learn and improve. Sure, it would be nice to have that interview with the member of the House of Representatives whom I’ve been talking to and waiting for since the middle of November. It’s a shame that this wasn't able to happen before the deadline.

But I’m not going to let that go. I’m still doing that by the way. I've been working on this for far too long to give it all up in the end. Tomorrow, I will interview this person for the work we submitted yesterday.

And maybe, finally, get some rest.

[cinematicnomad]

hi kat, what are some good and bad things about living in dc? (i know you technically commute buuuttt...). what are the general dc vibes like?

oh man, hey anon! yeah i can totally answer this.

so first things first, as you already mentioned, while i work in DC i actually commute from northern virginia (colloquially called NOVA). basically i live in the washington metropolitan area known as the DMV (which stands for DC-maryland-virginia).

second thing, i’ve been quarantining down in south carolina since mid-march because that’s where my parents retired (for who knows why?? we had no family or other connection to this state before they moved here in 2016) and my siblings wanted someone down here with them. 

but anyway! back to your question. 

i really love DC? i don’t know if it’s from growing up in a bunch of european cities, but i don’t really like HUGE cities like manhattan or LA. they tend to feel overwhelming to me. but cities like boston or DC are just the right size for me. and DC has the benefit of building height regulations?? so there are no massive skyscrapers in DC. here’s a little history lesson: back in 1894 the cairo hotel was built and it was 164 ft tall and basically it pissed everyone off. so in 1899 the city issued height regulations limiting their height to 90–110ft (depending on if it’s residential or business) OR to the width of the street in front, whichever was smaller. 

but i digress. anyway, i’m a fan of the look and feel of DC. the metro system is in no way the best i’ve ever been on, and wmata has a shit ton of issues, but i do love that i can get from maryland to virginia or anywhere else in the DMV region by hopping on the metro for a couple bucks. if you’re ever in the area download the app MetroHero bc it gives you so much more information about what’s going on on the metro—it’ll link up to twitter so you can see if people are tweeting about your line, it’ll tell you if the train has stalled somewhere, and more. one major bummer: wmata used to have later hours until a few years ago when they started doing all this upkeep and repairs on the metro (which they put off for literal decades) so if you live outside of the city and want to stay out late you either better have a place to crash or be willing to spend some money on an uber home. 

DC also just has a lot of shit for you to do? there’s always something going on in town—a new exhibit at one of the museums, a street festival, restaurant week, what have you. last year my friend called me up on a random saturday morning and was like “hey you want to go do this independent bookstore crawl that all the DC bookstore’s are participating in??” and i said yes and spent the entire day hopping between different neighborhoods and different bookstores until we wound up in georgetown at like 10PM and wandered into a bar we knew to eat a late dinner and down some fancy cocktails. like i’m rarely bored in DC when my friends want to get together and do something in the city. 

DC’s a big brunch city btw? that can be annoying if your’e not into it but i just feel like you should know it’s A Thing. it also has a big drinking culture. like that’s just a thing, it’s definitely a “let’s go to happy hour” type of city. drive like 15 miles out of the city and suddenly it’s not like that at all. (i worked at a major public university outside of DC and i think i went to happy hour like...less than 5 times the entire 4 years i was there, and then i started working at a university in DC and it’s like...an all the time thing). i have friends and coworkers who don’t drink and it’s definitely a thing they’ve noticed about DC.

be aware rent is pricey. obviously that’s why i live outside of actual DC. you can swing it if you have roommates or a partner to split the cost with but it’s something to keep in mind. the people i know who can afford to live alone make way more money than i do or don’t live in DC proper. or they’re willing to make certain sacrifices: i knew a girl who lived off of adams morgan  by herself and she didn’t have a washer or dryer? and her apt building didn’t have one either bc all the other apts in her building had their own in-house units. and the closest laundromat to her was like a $15 uber ride away. so sometimes you gotta make sacrifices if you want to live someplace specific. 

honestly there’s probably more to say but i’m kind of blanking at the moment so! if you have any specific questions i can def try to answer them. 

[sickficsies-and-whumpsies]

hi, may i ask you sick semi eita fic? he went amusement park with his team despite feeling a little bit unwell. Later he feels dizzy & nauseous, his team then take him to doctor/dorm. thank you 🥰

Oui oui, mon amie!!

TW: dizziness & nausea, vomiting, hospitals, brief mentions of IVs.

1.4k words, Gen.

ー ー ー

“Oh, the queue for that one isn’t too long!! Let’s go, guys!!”

Semi sighs. While Tendou’s volume doesn’t usually bother him, right now, stuck in the middle of Yagiyama Benyland, surrounded by screaming people and running children, he wishes his friend could turn it down a notch already.

The fabric around his neck feels constricting, suffocating. Semi tugs at the collar of his shirt lightly, clearing his throat silently as he trails behind the rest of the team.

He massages his stomach under the grey hoodie, feeling it gurgle under his touch. It was only two days ago when the pinch-server’s stomach first sent a painful, sudden jolt of white-hot pain throughout his body, making him shudder and gag, taken aback. But since his appendix has long been removed, Semi’s confident that it’s probably just a matter of too much coffee and too little water in his guts. It’s been a stressful week, after all. Nothing he can’t fix. It still hurts, though.

“Are you sure we’re tall enough for that ride?” Goshiki jokes, and everyone laughs, Tendou wrapping a lanky arm around the first-year and ruffling his head with the other hand. More laughter echoes among the group.

Semi shudders, chills running down his spine, stomach twisting. He struggles to even only force out a tiny smile.

ー

The safety belts press against his stomach and shoulders uncomfortably, and Semi doesn’t think he will make it. Next to him, Ushijima sits quietly, waiting for the ride to start. He briefly glances over, humming.

“Are you scared, Semi?”

There’s no malice in his voice, no curiosity either. It’s something along the lines of… Concern? Annoyance? Both?

“M’fine.” Semi gulps, “Just excited.”

“It’s okay to be scared.”

“M’not.”

“Alright. But if you were, it’d be okay.”

“Ushijiー!!” he gets cut off, abruptly, as the thing finally starts to move.

The higher it goes, the more Semi knows he’s not going to make it. There’s no doubt about it. He quickly tries to recall if there’s some sort of trashcan near the exit but he realises that he hasn’t seen any. 

His complexion bleaches rapidly. The thing is, Semi isn’t scared of roller coasters, he quite enjoys them, to be fair. Right now, the thing he fears the most is puking all over himself or worse, over the team’s captain.

And he knows it’s going to happen.

The people in the front row start screaming, Semi only a few rows back. It’s only a matter of seconds before he feels himself falling, and the world tunes out.

ー

He doesn’t actually pass out, really. Instead, once the operators remove his safety belts and wish him and his friends a fun day, he lets his shaky legs guide him down the metal staircase, eyes glazed over, blind. He’s not quite sure he’s moving, either. And he looks green.

Semi doesn’t even register that Ushijima’s strong hand is wrapped around his right upper arm, the left in the care of Tendou himself, eerily quiet. They set him down on the first empty bench they find, the team quiet behind the three.

It’s Reon to crouch in front of the ill teen, a firm hand squeezing his knee encouragingly. “Semi? Dude, hey.”

“...up…” he murmurs, seemingly catatonic, staring somewhere behind the team that has gathered in front of him, eyes filled to the brim with apprehension.

The setter swallows, a thin trail of saliva making its way down the corner of his chapped lips and down his twitching chin. He opens his mouth to speak, to say something, but nothing comes out, and soon enough he ducks his head between his knees and retches onto the pavement without a second warning. 

His teammates gasp, horrified and worried, but Reon is quick to avoid the onslaught and immediately usher the others away, leaving Tendou and Ushijima behind. The taller guy rubs at his back firmly, while the other puts a palm flat on Semi’s forehead, preventing him from giving himself a whiplash. 

His skin feels cold and clammy, ashen. Tendou hisses. 

Not long passes before Semi throws up again, more and more bile splashing between his feet, little droplets staining his shoes and jeans. He retches and gags, helpless, eyes stinging painfully, about to pop out of his skull.

Reon jogs back a minute later, stopping a couple of meters away to give Semi some breathing room. “Should we call an ambulance? He looks like death warmed over...”

Ushijima shakes his head. “We should try and make him drink something, first.”

“I don’t think he’s up to it, Toshi.” Tendou reasons, “Semi-Semi, hey, you need to take a breath, my man.” he adds, patting the boy’s shoulder while Ushijima keeps massaging circles on his back.

But Semi doesn’t. He can’t. His stomach twists and knots painfully, and he doubles over, arms wrapped protectively around his abdomen as he hiccup and dry-heaves weakly. 

“Does your stomach hurt?” Reon asks, careful, calm as ever, “Do you need an ambulance?”

“Yeah, we should call ‘em.” Tendou says, “It’s not normal to feel this sick after riding a roller coaster as bland as that one, andー”

“He was feeling ill before the ride, too. I didn’t think it was this bad, though. I apologize, Semi.” Ushijima interjects. “I think the ride was simply the last straw.”

The three stay quiet for a moment, Semi’s desperate struggles and pants and hiccups drowning out every other noise. And finally, blissfully, about ten minutes after sitting down, his jagged breaths come to a halt, and he slumps to the side, crashing into Tendou.

“Semi-Semi...? Oh shit. Is he dead? Semi-Semi?” Tendou gasps, “Guys, a little help?”

The ill teen is quick to blink his eyes open, glassy and dull, spent. “H’rts.”

“What hurts?” 

“S-stomach. Head.” 

Reon nods, serious. He then takes his phone out and quickly types something, before glancing at Ushijima and Tendou, who are both massaging Semi’s trembling back, subconsciously. 

“Okay, the closest bus stop is about five minutes away on foot from here, and then it takes about ten minutes to get to Sendai Red Cross Hospital by bus, and another minute on foot after that. What do you guys say?” Reon asks.

Tendou is fast to nod, “Let’s go, we might catch the first bus available if we hurry.”

“I’ll carry him.” Ushijima adds.

Semi then struggles, shaking his headー aggravating his nausea and gagging silently. “Th-the others, and y-you, th-the pa-park and- and the tickets andー”

“Woh, woh, slow down, Semi-Semi!! It’s fine, we’ve been here for hours already anyway, and the entrance fees aren’t that expensive. No worries, okay? Let us worry about the rest.” Tendou says, cheerful, “We’ll text the others to let them know we’re leaving. We can always reschedule for another time, alright?”

“Done.” Reon smiles, waving his phone, ‘Shiratorizawa Volleyball Club’ chat open and rapidly flooding with texts from everyone. “Let’s go.” 

ー

Luckily, and unsurprisingly, the bus is perfectly on time, and Semi doesn’t even have the time to register that he’s an eighteen year-old being offered a piggy-back ride from another eighteen year-old. He couldn’t care less. Instead, once he’s on the bus, he drifts, drained.

ー

“Anyone here for Semi Eita?”

Tendou, Reon and Ushijima are quick to reach the doctor, wide-eyed. “How is he!?”

She smiles, “Your friend will be okay, nothing to worry about. He was terribly dehydrated and overall exhausted, courtesy of the raging viral gastroenteritis he has. The nurses gave him an IV to pump some fluids into his system, and once it’s done, I’m going to prescribe him some probiotics to help with the infection and he’ll be free to leave.”

“Can we see him?” Tendou frets, “Is there anything else we should do? Are you sure he’s okay?”

The doctor nods, her expression firm and reassuring. “Viral infections are extremely common, we treat thousands of similar cases each day. I promise you, Semi-san will be okay. And yes, you may see him, of course. Come with me, please.” 

The three follow the kind doctor quietly as she leads them to Semi’s bed, in the ER, the thin curtains between his and other patients’ beds being his only source of privacy. 

Upon seeing them, Semi sits up, grinning sheepishly, cheeks tinted in red. “Hey there.” he grins.

His friends chuckle, rapidly making their way toward his bed, ruffling his hair and pushing him around with calculated motions.

He’ll be fine. 

ー ー ー

I got carried away and started researching how to get to the closest hospital from Yagiyama Benyland, a real amusement park in Miyagi. And yeah, the Red Cross Hospital’s real, too, and the bus as well. I had so much fun researching this stuff. So yeah, I hope you liked it, let me know!!

Also, anon, if you have an AO3 tell me so that I can gift this fic to you when I post it there in a few days.

September 2, 2021

[justsomefluff]

OMG I LOVED that reaction you did, and the scenario like thing was really good!! I loved it, thank you!! Can I request another reaction (mini-scenario)? Like ATEEZ confessing to their crush while they (ATEEZ) are drunk? (San said Yeo does aegyo/is cute when drunk I'd like to see this ^^)

This is so cute, I would pay good money to see them tipsy no lie lmao. also this is fluff and crack at the same time so...I hope you like it lmao

Hongjoong:

(^ he’d do this during a drunk confession you cant change my mind ^)

Okay so when he’s drunk I feel like he sees himself as being really composed and cool

but in reality... not so much

and, even if he hadn’t been planning on confessing to you

oh boy, his body starts shaking a lil and you’re low-key like... 911?

like his body is telling him to ABORT MISSION but once his drunk brain has made the decision there's no going back

So, in his mind, this is what he’s saying out loud okay

“Y/n, I just wanted to let you know that I have some serious feelings for you. I know you may not feel the same way, but I just needed to tell you.”

Super awesome, everyone wishes to be that composed right?

Well here’s what he really said:

“Listen here, you cute mother-, no I shouldn’t swear at you, my bad. I’m totally in love with you right? Watchu think bout dat?”

and then he’s quiet, and smiling bc he’s proud of himself and you’re just like um????

like that’s not how you imagined this would go

But you also know that he’s gonna be super embarrassed about this in the morning so you just say

“Let’s talk tomorrow, Joongie?”

and he smiles at the nickname and nods and kinda puts his head down

You honestly cant wait to tell him you feel the same when he’s sober

and make fun of him for getting wasted

Seonghwa:

so Seonghwa, unlike Joong, is actually pretty composed

like at first, he’s wildin’ and everything

but then he just calms down super fast

like so fast you get whiplash

and he just smiles at you and you’re like “...freak”

then he frowns and he’s like “I like to look at pretty things that make me smile”

“You make me smile too, Hwa” :)

then he just grabs you into a hug and starts swaying you guys side to side

like some awkward and forced middle school slow-dance 

“What are you doing?”

and he shushes you to preserve the moment but you're like “I want answers”

then he finally leans his head down and his lips are brushing the shell of your ear so softly you barely notice

“I think I love you”

he strikes me as the kind of person who wants to confess but also isn’t ever 100% sure he wants to confirm that he loves you so he throws that “I think” in there to cushion the blow if you reject him

but, luckily for him, you do feel the same

you just turn your head ever so slightly to the side and peck his temple

he smiles and rests his head on your shoulder and squeezes your hips before wrapping his arms around you completely

“I kinda need to hear you say it”

“I think I love you too, Hwa”

Yunho:

okay this big ole baby right

I feel like he’s the kind of drunk who is crazy for a little bit but gets tired really fast

so after like an hour of insanity, his eyes are drooping and you’ve settled on a couch (or seat, wherever your location might be)

and he smooshes his cheek into your thigh and you’re totally aware that he’s gonna fall asleep on you

but you’re cool with that, I mean who wouldn’t be

and after a couple minutes of silence, you think he’s knocked out completely

he suddenly turns his head to look up at you

and you look down at him to ask if he’s okay, or if he needs anything

he just starts laughing and then this IDIOT

pokes your double chin (bc I mean why does he have to look at you from that angle) and goes “How is it that I like you so much, even your double chin is cute?”

part of you is like “omg he likes me” and the other part of you is like “...im gonna slap him. don't talk about my double chin”

so, given your inner turmoil, you're silent for a minute and he starts to pout

“you don’t like my double chin?” and he makes a double chin and grabs your hand to make you poke it

“say you like my double chin too, please”

“Yunho, I like you too... double chin and all” (you had decided that you are not going to slap him after all)

and thats kind of the end of the night bc after that crackhead confession he actually falls asleep

but you are lucky enough that he remembers it all the next morning and it becomes kind of a thing in your relationship to make double chins at each other then say “I love you” 

Yeosang:

drunk Yeosang and aegyo here we go

whiny baby voice and big eyes and pouting all the way

like he’s not so much into doing the cutesy actions like finger hearts and stuff

but refers to himself as “Sangie” and talks about himself in third person too

CLINGY

not necessarily cuddly, but always has to be holding your hand or else he’ll cry

calls you pet names like Jagi and my love and stuff

and at first you’re like aw he’s a cute drunk and tease him a little bit

but then he pouts even harder and murmurs “I'm serious”

you’re like O.O

“you mean it? you really like me, Sangie?”

nods his head furiously like you seriously think he’s gonna get a concussion for about .5 seconds

like okay I get it, you mean it, please stop doing that your head is not a maraca

“I like you too”

cue the biggest, goofiest, toothiest grin you’ve ever seen

makes big ole fishy lips at you, and points at them to ask for a kiss

so you just give him a quick peck, bc you don't really want either of you to be drunk for your first real kiss

but that satisfies him for the time being :)

San:

Sannie best boy, I cannot stress that enough

the sweetest lil drunk okay

tries to take care of you even though he’s the drunk one

thirsty? he’s gonna get up and get you a glass of whatever you want even if he spills half of it trying to give it to you

hungry? he’ll get you some if you agree to share

so halfway through a tub of ice cream he decides to lay some truth on you okay

“I like my ice cream like I like you”

and you, of course, having seen that meme, respond with “ugly?” and you cackle at your own joke

but he’s so offended

“apologize to yourself and this ice cream”

“wtf? why?”

“because ice cream is the second most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen after you. apologize”

literally holds the tub of ice cream up to your face, and will literally carve a sad face into the ice cream to make you apologize quicker

and when you apologize he eats the sad face and draws a smile

sentimental cheeseball is all he is in that moment okay

“you really think I’m pretty?”

he looks at you like “...duh”

“I think you’re pretty too, Sannie” and he smiles so big :’)

and both of you know that this would be the start of a really happy relationship aww

Mingi:

I bet Mingi is the cutest drunk okay like if you thought he was a giant puppy before get ready you aint seen nothin yet

and you don't even get a warning before he confesses bc he says it so out of the blue

like his whole plan was to drink some liquid courage iykyk and then he was gonna confess

but he ended up getting a lil more tipsy than originally intended

and he just blurts it out and he’s stuttering and lisping and just struggling to get all the right words out

but you just think it’s super endearing

“Minnie, are you drunk?”

he starts blowing raspberries in the air and starts shaking his head “you think I’m drunk?” 

literally hiccuping after every word lmao

like yes, Mingi, I think you're drunk

still blowing incredulous raspberries all over the place

and you blow one on his cheek and he starts giggling like the baby he is

“why you do that”

“bc I like you too, Minnie! also you were starting to spit and I needed you to stop that”

he giggles and nods at you, just happy that you feel the same way

nuzzles his head into your shoulder and plays with your fingers for the rest of the time youre together

Wooyoung:

okay he’s a crackhead already so I don't even think alcohol would be something he’s even offered most of the time lmao

but when he is all hell breaks loose

no subtlety about his confession at all

like he literally screams it at you

he had been paying extra attention to you all night, which you didn't even notice bc you liked him too and never imagined he felt the same

so you’re like he so friendly and clingy when he’s drunk

but five minutes later he’s like “DID YOU KNOW IM IN LOVE WITH YOU”

and you’re so taken aback because

1.) he just screamed in your face

2.) he just screamed that in your face

and then he’s quiet and just staring at you, waiting for a response

you’re so dumbfounded that all you say is “you too”

but thats enough for him

“GOOD THATS AWESOME”

and thats basically the end of the conversation bc he gets easily distracted

you have to remind him the next day that that conversation had even happened actually

and he’s like “oh yeahhhhh”

then you’re able to actually talk about what you both feel and be almost normal for about ten minutes lmao

Jongho:

since he’s on the quieter side compared to the rest of the group, I think this shows even more when he’s been drinking

but it’s almost concerning how quiet he is

like if you had never seen him drunk before you’d probably be really worried

and that’s exactly what happened

you went to check on him to see why he wasn't joining in the fun and he looks at you, a little teary from the alcohol

or maybe he’s just deep in his feels who knows

we’ve all been there amiright

and he’s like “just like you a lot you know that?’

you’re like “I was most certainly unaware of that, sir”

and he apologizes??? like why???

“I like you too, doofus, why are you sorry”

then he smiles and means it for the first time that whole night

he feels like he could crack all of the apples in the world he’s so happy

side-note: he probably could break all them apples fr

so basically you just made him the happiest apple murderer in the world

he’ll break all the apples for you baby

[vs-redemption]

Crime is Common. Logic is Rare. (Ch 13)

Chapter Thirteen: Trust (HawksxGN!Reader)

Plot summary: You thought your hands were full as a regular quirk geneticist, but then you meet Hawks and things get even more exciting!

Warnings:�� 

⚠️This story contains spoilers from the manga.

⚠️Some events and plot points have been altered from the original manga

Tag List: @ gayforkeigo

Next Chapter : Chapter Guide

You tell yourself not to panic as you ride in the back of the taxi taking you to the area where Hawks was currently on patrol. You flip your phone over and over in your hands, looking for any signs that it had been tampered with. It was password protected, so there was no way the doctor could’ve done anything even if he had touched it, right? You shake your head and hold down the power button until the screen goes dark. Maybe you were being way too paranoid, but it made you feel safer for the moment.

“You sure you don’t have an exact address?” the taxi drive calls over his shoulder.

“Just look for a guy with giant red wings flying around,” you tell him impatiently.

“You seem eager to see Hawks.” He laughs, “You a fan of his or something?”

“Yeah.” It was the easy answer and you didn’t feel like trying to convince him of the truth at the moment. You were too busy trying to recall the details from the lost memories from Dr. Garaki’s lab. It was probably impossible to recall the stuff from when you’d actually used your quirk, but you should be able to remember something from the moments in between.

“There he is!” The driver announces suddenly while pulling over to the side of the road. “Looks like you were right about him patrolling this district right now. You’re not stalking the poor guy are you?”

“Nope, just a lucky guess,” You hand him some bills from your wallet. “Keep the change.” You hop out of the car, and head straight for the winged hero. You had told him to keep an eye out for you, so it wasn’t long before he spotted you and drifted down to meet you.

“Hey.” You greet him neutrally, but he was already picking up on your discomfort. His facial features turn serious and he tilts his head.

“Hey,” he lifts his visor off his face so he can see you more clearly. “How did the meeting with the doctor go?” You weren’t sure what to say. You look down at your phone which was still clutched in your hands.

“Well, it was interesting,” you shrug. “He’s going to help me improve my quirk I think. We did a few impromptu tests today, but then I had a bit of a dizzy spell so we had to stop.” Hawks raises his feathery eyebrows in concern.

“What do you mean a ‘dizzy spell’? Are you okay?” He asks. You look down at your phone again.

“I don’t know. I just passed out, I guess.” You were starting to feel ridiculous. There was no way the doctor had bugged your phone. You look back at Hawks with a new found resolve to tell him everything. “The doctor is making…” Hawks suddenly holds up his hand to stop you from finishing your sentence.

“Tell me about it after we get you something to eat, okay?” he gives you a strange, tight-lipped smile. “The place I’m renting isn’t too far from here. You cool to fly?”

“Uh… maybe.” Hawks lets out a small laugh at your hesitation.

“I promise not to drop you,” he says before scooping you up bridal style and taking off into the air at a more reasonable speed than he normally would. “I would be totally fine with taking a taxi if it weren’t for my wings,” he explains. “I don’t do well in cramped spaces.” You nod in understanding, wishing you didn’t have the doctor situation hovering over you so you could enjoy the flight a little more. You arrived at a small apartment complex in just a couple minutes. Hawks unlocks the door and leads you into the studio apartment.

“I thought you didn’t like small spaces,” you can’t help but remind him as you look around. It was basically empty except for the few pieces of furniture that came with the apartment.

“Ugh yeah,” he frowns while snatching a small magnetic note pad and pen off the refrigerator. “This place is just temporary. I really miss my apartment back in Kyushu.” He scribbles something down on the paper and then hands it to you. Before you can read the note Hawks extends one of his wings and points to the feathers. “I can never quite clean my wings properly in the tiny shower in this place.” Your eyes travel to the bright red wing and you notice something out of place. There was a small metal device tucked in between two of the feathers. If he hadn’t pointed it out specifically, you probably would never have noticed. You look back at Hawks in confusion but he just puts a finger over his lips before pointing to the paper in your hands. What was going on now? Was someone monitoring Hawks? You look down at the note and read: 

What’s the doctor making?

“Uh,” You look back up at Hawks, feeling uncertain as questions about the situation pile up in your mind. Was Hawks involved with the doctor somehow? Was this part of the top-secret mission he’d told you about? Could you even trust him? You’d always felt like there was a part of him he’d been hiding, but now you were wondering if it was better to keep that door closed.

“Hey,” Hawks pulls the paper back and writes something below his first question. “I’m kind of worried about the whole ‘dizzy spell’ thing. Has that ever happened before when you’ve used your quirk?” He hands the paper back to you.

Did he do something to you?

You read the question and then shrug to say you didn’t know. “I’ve never lost consciousness while using my quirk before,” You tell him while picking up the pen and answering his first question. You weren’t sure exactly what was going on, but you decided to trust Hawks completely for now. He definitely had some of his own secrets, but nothing he’d done had ever given you cause to think he was a bad guy.

I saw him synthesize Nomu DNA the first time I met him.

“I’ve gotten headaches from trying to push my limits but that’s about it,” you continue talking while passing him the paper. Hawks looks genuinely shocked when he reads your message, clearly surprised that you’d been holding onto that crazy information. The two of you continue having the double conversation. It was a little difficult, but eventually you’re able to fill him in on everything you wanted him to know about what had been happening with Dr. Garaki. Hawks was really curious about what the doctor had shown you while you were using your quirk, but no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t remember. One thing was certain though, if the Doctor was making Nomu blood in secret, perhaps he was making actual Nomus as well.

What is that thing on you wing? Why do we have to talk in like this?

You change the subject back to him now that you’d told your story and Hawks sighs after reading your questions. You can tell by the look he gives you that he’s trying to decide if he can trust you. This whole day had been surreal. All the stuff with the doctor was crazy of course, but now you had to adjust to this whole other side of Hawks. He holds your stare for a little longer than what was comfortable before making up his mind. He lets out a breath and then writes down his reply.

I infiltrated the League of Villains to gather intel for the Hero Commission. I’m letting the Villains keep an eye on me with their recording devices so that I can gain their trust.

It was your turn to go wide eyed in shock. Hawks was pretending to join the League of Villains?! But that sounded extremely dangerous. It made sense why he wanted to keep the conversation about the doctor quiet now though. He didn’t want the Villains to know he might’ve found the source of the Nomus. You snatch up the pen and pitch an idea.

I might be able to help you by working in the doctor’s lab.

Hawks grabs the pen back.

No. You shouldn’t go back there.

You scribble back.

If I don’t, that’ll be suspicious.

The paper started filling up fast as you both argued back and forth. You were scared to go back into the lab with the doctor. If you could gain his trust though, maybe you could pick up on something that would help the heroes take down the League of Villains. Hawks was worried about the doctor hurting you, but there was no way he’d try to knock you out every time you worked with him. In the end, you both came to a compromise. You would continue to work with the doctor unless something really extreme happened again, like you passing out for no reason.

“Are you sure you’re feeling all right now though?” Hawks asks once the paper and all its contents were destroyed. He pulls your face into his hands. “We don’t know what made you pass out, and I don’t want it to happen again.”

“I feel okay,” you promise, putting your hands over his. “Don’t you have to get back to your patrol?”

“Yeah,” He frowns. You could tell he was still trying to process everything you’d told him and everything he’d revealed to you. “This is a weird relationship.”

“Yes it is,” you agree with a small laugh. You wondered if your relationship with Hawks would be okay. It was still so new, and now you were taking a gamble by trusting each other with some pretty heavy secrets. It was nice that he had faith in you, but you were going to constantly worry about him now that you knew he was working with the League of Villains. If they found out he was a double agent, they’d probably kill him. You were going to have to be very careful around the doctor in case he was also working with the villains.

“Let me fly you to the train station,” Hawks breaks you out of your train of thought.

“How about we walk?” you suggest. “I don’t want to end up with whiplash.”

“Deal,” Hawks agrees as you both head for the door, “But you’re not going to have to let me fly you around sometimes. It comes with the territory of dating a bird.”

“Right,” you let out a short laugh. “If you say so.”

“I do say so,” he grins pleasantly and you can’t help but admire the way he can smile even on a day as stressful and confusing as this one. Whether it was an act or not, you were grateful to have someone as good and strong as Hawks to rely on and trust.

[whitherliliesbloom]

the instagram boyfriends club

[ ffxivwrite2020 ] ★ [ masterlist ] ★ [ prompt #16 - lucubration ]

[ various wol/npc ships ] ★ [ 2,576 words ] [ highschool / modern au ]

haurchefant greystone, estinien wyrmblood and alphinaud leveilleur. mentions laurelis by @ancientechos​, peppermint by @mintdrop​. illya is also mentioned and appears briefly at the end. may be a little ooc but do i care?? a lot of the jokes were stolen from this youtube video, which was also the main inspiration for this fic. 

instagram pics are #seriousbusiness

Saturday mornings were typically an uneventful affair, and thankfully so. His duties as the student council president often meant hectic school days filled with a mountain high of paperwork on top of his already impressive laundry list of assignments. Alphinaud was thankful for any little moment of peace he can get - weekends in particular were sacred, reserved only for either relaxation or outings with his family, friends or girlfriend.

And yet...

[[One unread message from Estinien]]

Estinien: meet me at haurchefant’s house in 1 hour. You: Wait. In an hour??? What for?? Estinien: just be there You: ???? You: This is so sudden. Is something wrong?? You: Estinien???

Of course he’d be left on read, as was common when texting Estinien.. sometimes at the most egregious of times. This in particular would be one of the absolute worst examples of Estinien’s utter lack of prudence. No matter how many times Alphinaud would dial his friend’s number, the unanswered ringing would only cause his nerves to spike.

Within the campus grounds he was a well respected figure who possessed more authority than any of the other students of his cohort.. and yet outside of it, he’d always be reduced to being something of a pushover, one who couldn’t help but to allow himself to be pulled by the whims of his friends. 

He could only pray that whatever it was Estinien’s decided to drag him into this time, it wouldn’t take too much of his precious saturday rest.

-------------------

“You want Haurchefant to teach us how to take instagram photos??” Alphinaud’s voice raises in pitch, nothing short of bewildered by Estinien’s request to their mutual friend as he stepped inside of the house. “I never took you to be the type who cared about that-”

“It’s not for me.” With a low grunt, Estinien mutters between grit teeth before settling himself onto the couch with a burdened thud. “It’s for Totomi.”

In an instant, it all made sense, and Alphinaud has to withhold himself from letting out an audible chuckle. It’s no surprise that an outgoing girl from the drama club who has a penchant for the extravagant and flare would like to post photos online for her following to see. Though Alphinaud himself wasn’t exactly an expert on the matter - his own instagram profile was only ever updated semi-regularly with ordinary photos of classmates and student council activities, he was at least aware that there were others who practically lived their entire lives on that app.

“Ah! You wish to learn how to take better pictures for your beloved! How wonderful!”

Haurchefant’s jovial tone elicits a grimace from Estinien, whose grip on his phone only tightens.

“I’m just sick of her asking me to constantly retake shots. I’d rather not have to stand in the middle of the street for ten minutes just to take a single picture of her in front of a brick wall.”

“And you thought to ask Haurchefant...why?” Alphinaud asks with an inquisitive tilt of his head.

“You seriously don’t know??”

“Know what?”

“Haurchefant is called the god of instagram boyfriends.. or some dumb shit like that.” 

“Uh... what?” He’s heard of instagram. He’s heard of instagram models... but what in twelves name was an instagram boyfriend?

Haurchefant’s shoulders pull back in pride upon hearing that indirect praise, however, evidently more than a little pleased that his reputation and ‘fame’.. if it could be considered that, was beginning to spread by word of mouth.

“I’m so truly flattered that you would think so highly of me!” With a raise of both his arms, Haurchefant grins. Estinien rolls his eyes and mutters ‘i wasn’t praising you’ beneath his breath. “Indeed! I will admit to be at least well experienced in the art of taking instagram pictures for my beloved!”

“Laurelis? Pardon me for asking.. I’m not surprised that she has an instagram account.. but what makes you so special?”

Right on cue, Haurchefant raises up the screen of his phone, proudly displaying the profile of the ever familiar pink-haired miqo’te. Admittedly, Alphinaud didn’t know very much about Laurelis. What little he did know was only informed to him by her best friend, who just so happened to be the very same young lady he was dating. And from the few times they’ve spoken, he could see the miqo’te as being quite an instagram addict too - as most extroverted types typically are.

Upon seeing the numbers listed on the profile, however, Alphinaud’s eyes very nearly pop out of his sockets.

“Over five thousand followers?!” That’s more than the entire student body and staff members of Eorzea academy combined. The twelve knows it will take an eternity for Alphinaud himself to see that amount of followers on his account. 

“My dear is something of a minor celebrity! And I take great pride in knowing that I was able to play a small part in helping her take the pristine, ‘aesthetically pleasing’ shots as they say that she is known for today!”

“Good for you.” If estinien’s eyes could roll any harder they’d roll to the back of his skull. 

“Ah, but what of you, Alphinaud? Are you here to learn how to take better photos for Illya?”

The shorter elezen widens his eyes in surprise, not having expected to have a question directed straight at him, but he is quick to shake his head in response. As far as he was aware, Illya wasn’t exactly more instagram savvy than he himself was. She did have an account, one he naturally followed, but it would only ever be updated once every several days - and rarely with actual photographs of herself. Food, plant life and animals made up the majority of her profile’s portfolio, not that Alphinaud ever failed to double tap on any of her pictures, no matter how menial they seemed. 

Though, he supposes she could be considered slightly internet famous as well - just not at all in the same way her best friend was. He hears that her gardening blog has just reached a 2 thousand subscriber milestone, recently.. which he imagines to be quite a feat especially considering it was by all accounts quite literally a website filled with nothing but gardening tips, tutorials and floral arrangement pictures.

“Not exactly. Estinien forced-” he nearly continues to speak, but the low grunt emitted from the couch causes Alphinaud to swallow his words “-encouraged me to come along for the lesson. He said it’d be....livelier with the three of us.”

“Well, there certainly is no harm in more company! Regardless of your reasons for being here, I’m sure the things you’ll learn today will help you and Illya in the future!” 

Haurchefant moves over to the couch, tapping on Estinien’s shoulder who could only let out a groan in annoyance.

“Now then.. shall we get on with the lesson?”

-----------------------------

“Now, let’s do some practice shots! Say that I have asked you to take an OOTD picture!” 

“The hell’s OOTD.”

“Ah, outfit of the day, my friend! Now let’s have you take a picture of me and I shall give you my candid feedback! Starting with you, Alphinaud!”

The shortest of the trio thinks to protest for a moment, but quickly presses his lips together and reluctantly holds his phone up to snap a photo of his taller peer, who has already taken station by the window and posed for the camera.

“Ah a perfectly serviceable photo, my friend! But it has one critical, devastating flaw.”

“I-It’s that serious?? What is it?”

Haurchefant points to the bottom of the picture where his legs were cut off and shakes his head.

“You must never, ever cut off the feet in a full body shot, especially for an outfit of the day picture! This is one of the most common pitfalls of instagram boyfriends!” With an exaggerated wave, he gestures to his boots. “Remember! The shoes are part of the outfit!”

The sheer enthusiasm of Haurchefant’s loud proclamation only gives Alphinaud further whiplash when he turns to look at Estinien, whose face has darkened with the deepest frown he’s seen his friend wear in a long while. 

“It’s just shoes... why the hell does it matter?”

He’s more than a little disgruntled as he recalled the way Totomi had asked him to take a photo of her new wool sweater and jeans, and her numerous loud demands for him to retake the shot with her bright red sneakers in frame. It wasn’t even a new pair - but one she’s worn for years...unable to appreciate the effort she’d went into making sure her entire wardrobe was perfectly color coordinated.

“Grumble all you wish, friend, but these are things of great importance in the eyes of our ladies! Now, repeat after me! The shoes are part of the outfit!”

“T-the shoes are part of the outfit...” Alphinaud mutters, as Estinien grumbles even further. His uncooperative behavior only causes Haurchefant to grow more pushy.

“Louder! With more gusto! THE SHOES ARE PART OF THE OUTFIT!”

“Nobody gives a damn about your shoes!”

No wonder Totomi has to nag him to retake her photos...

-----------------------------

“The angle you take the photo can either turn the picture into a stunning piece of work, or an unaesthetic disaster! Please Alphinaud my friend, demonstrate by taking a photo of Estinien sitting on this chair.”

Alphinaud has never held his phone in his hands for as long as he has on this day, so much that he can practically feel the heat from its overuse start to scald his palms and fingers. And yet he dares not to argue, and instead quickly snaps a photo of Estinien as instructed, who looks just as unamused and tired as he was, if not even more so. 

“Splendid, Alphinaud! The focus is just right! However, you would have done better were you to have taken the photo at a higher angle.”

“What difference would that have made?”

“A high-angled photo slims down the face, while a low-angled picture elongates the legs! Indeed, it may seem surprising, but such small, subtle differences in even the height at which you hold your camera could make all the difference in the world!” One would assume they were listening to a professional photographer speak from the way Haurchefant lectured them about the intricacies and importance of camera placement in taking instagram photographs.. and Alphinaud wasn’t sure if he was more exasperated or amazed. “Now, take a photo of Alphinaud and show me your fine work, Estinien!”

With yet another roll of his eyes, and a barely audible grumble, Estinien steps forward and holds up his phone, towering over his seated friend and quickly snaps a photo.

------------------------

“Now, we shall practice taking pictures of one another within an imaginary scenario.” The cups of coffee and plates of biscuit Haurchefant had fetched from the kitchen were gently placed upon the dining table, before he steps back and gestures towards Alphinaud. “Say your lady and you are on a date, and she asks you to take a photo of her at the table.”

 “Um.. well, something like this?”

Alphinaud holds his phone up to Haurchefant, whose smile falters for but a brief moment.

“Oh dear, my friend.. Did you not notice the misplaced broom in the background?” He leans down and taps on the side of the photograph, where sure enough a blurry and seemingly innocuous broom stood just on the edge of the frame. It seemed harmless enough to him, and yet that mistake seemed enough to cause even Haurchefant, whose joyous demeanor never seemed to be breakable, to slump his shoulders. “The secret to success is a keen eye and attention to detail, my friend.”

For the first time in three hours, Estinien lets out a smirk and a chuckle. It seems the only way he’d get any enjoyment out of this little photo taking lesson is to see Alphinaud be told off and dejected.

“You suck at this, don’t you?”

Alphinaud’s shoulders rise and fall with a nonchalant shrug.

“Pardon, but at least my photographs are in focus.” 

“You wanna say that a little louder again, punk?”

“Now, now! Let us not fight! We are brothers in arms, and there is still much and more to learn! For our next lesson, I shall teach you how to take pictures of food and drinks!”

-----------------------

Alphinaud’s phone battery has never once died on him in his life. Even with his normally liberal use of his applications such as the notepad, calculators and on the rare occasions, prolonged social media use, he’s never used his phone enough in a single day for the battery to ever run out.

That day had certainly been the first.. and it was also at the end of that saturday, upon watching the light and life from his smart phone die out on him, that Haurchefant urged him to get a portable charger... among other things such as a selfie stick. He’d even downloaded one of those photo editing applications, one that he has still yet to fully figure his way around. 

If there was anything he’d learn on that fateful day, and thought to himself as he walked home under the hues of the setting sun that evening, it was that taking instagram pictures was seriously not a joke.

And here he was on a date with the gardening club president a mere week later.. and a far changed... and scarred man.

“Is something wrong, Alphinaud?”

Illya had caught him staring at a brick wall with a piece of particularly ‘aesthetic’ looking graffiti, and for a moment his head had been filled with naught by red blaring sirens and a words that repeatedly chanted ‘photo op’ in his head. It was only by the grace of her voice, and a slight tug of her hand in his that his attention would be pulled away, a forced smile upon his expression.

“Oh, forgive me. I was just.. distracted.”

Illya has never asked him to take a photo of her, much less stopped their date dead in its tracks in order to take a picture for her social media. She never was the type who cared much for arbitrary internet fame and followers.. and he thought he had been as well. 

T’would seem however, that he’s taken Haurchefant’s advice to heart, a little too much for his own good.. and he’s certainly far more attentive of his surroundings and much to his own horror, of the outfits that the people around him wore. One thing he hadn’t exactly counted on however... was an interest being ignited within him, an urge to take photos at golden opportunities in life when he would have otherwise thought it too mundane to capture before his lesson with Haurchefant and Estinien.

And as he stands stock still with a phone in his hands, his adorable and well dressed girlfriend by his side.. and an incredibly aesthetically pleasing looking brick wall.. And the motto of the instagram boyfriends club Haurchefant had asked him to repeat like a mantra that day echoed incessantly in his ears.

‘Her likes are your likes’

The eyes of the camera were to be treated like a gods’.. and if they thought their girlfriends beautiful, what better way to express that love than to capture that beauty on camera and share it for the world to see?

“Would you like to take a picture, Illya?”

[vaguely-gestures-to-the-void]

Hindsight: My thoughts on Loki (2021)

Welcome back! Spoilers below!

I need to clarify that I watch Loki purely as an escape. I've got a biased perspective in that regard because I don’t actively try to find fault with the show, though there are definitely things I’m not so inclined to. This is more of what I noticed and think things mean and it’s something I’m doing for fun. Anyways, here's my thoughts on episode 2 my loves.

Episode 2: THE VARIANT

Pre-title scene

Miss Minutes’ monologue in the recap is different to the one last ep.

1985 Oshkosh, Wisconsin

C-20!

“Today’s guest performances” on a board. Don’t really know if it means anything tho.

The Iconic (TM) I Need A Hero scene.

Pony.

The green tent - the lair of Loki.

I know not everyone’s a fan of the lighting, but it made sense to me. They’re still in the dark about who Sylvie is.

Why does C-20 take off her helmet? For the drama?

I hope Sylvie cleaned her blade. Narnia taught me well.

The Time Samsung (I can’t remember what it’s called right now) says that the date’s 04/12/1985.

Loki’s first mission (?)

‘Volume 26’ - how many of these does Mobius have?? #giveMobiusajetski

“ONLY at your LOCAL AUTHORIZED DEALER” - subtext about the TVA being control freaks? Jet ski safety?

I googled Wake Magazine. They’re up to volume 20 from what I saw, whilst Loki is reading volume 26, so I guess that’s something

Loki and Miss Minutes lmaooo.

Behind Loki’s elbow is the taxidermy something from the last episode. Also confirms that Loki threatened Casey at Mobius’ desk lol.

The thing has an egg?? What the hell is Mobius collecting? (He’s a Harry Hart variant lmao).

There are little twitches in Miss Minnutes’ hands. That’s so cool!

The egg timer’s a nice easter egg (I’m a comedian).

Mobius! B-15! :)

Is it just me or do the minutemen look similar, but not exactly the same. Makes sense if they’re variants.

I just realised the lights are built into the ceiling. Whoops.

What’s Mobius’ favourite?

Couple of things:

The racks full of identical uniforms/ones just hung up on doors.

The music has started to pick up the pace, but not in the way we see later on in the episode.

There’s a sign saying ‘FARE THEE WELL’ on it. Google tells me that it’s ‘used to express good wishes on parting’. Dang that was some good foreshadowing!

The person that looks like Agatha is still present.

I wonder whether it was supposed to be colder or whether the weather was just like that when they filmed.

The pony’s still around.

I think B-15 certainty that “a Loki couldn’t have gotten the jump of C-20” comes from her experience with them. She constantly tries to make it clear that because she’s not a variant, she’d know Loki better than he would, which (personally) makes the revelation that she’s a variant feel more devastating.

Again with the lighting, they’re still in partial darkness, constantly moving in and out of the light. Whilst what Loki says about the variant setting a trap is true, it isn’t in the context that he says it. Sylvie whoops their asses later.

The black and red-orange flags remind me of tomb markers. It’s a stretch, ik.

B-15 only has tally marks on one side of her helmet.

Mobius has fake pockets in his suit jacket. They’re the worst.

The ticking increasing in tempo as they approach red line - great for setting up tension.

I believe that Loki uses personal space like a weapon - slowly approaching them from the front, and then going behind Mobius’ back when he wants his way. It would make anyone uncomfortable, especially on a subconscious level because there’s a threat behind you.

Or maybe it’s that I have different personal space boundaries, not everyone likes being approached from behind. Loki’s movement felt intentional at least.

Getting Mobius to physically turn his way because of that might have been very subtle manipulation?

Loki looking back and forth trying to judge their reactions lol.

I liked the music in this scene, it sets up tension for Loki’s first attempt at betraying Mobius but then doesn’t completely dismiss it when it’s resolved.

Ravonna Renslayer’s office

The music here is 18 morceaux, Op. 72, No. 2. Berceuse. 18 morceaux, Op. 72: No. 2, Berceuse (Arr. For Theremin and piano) by Clara Rockmore for anyone that’s curious. I found out through Natalie Holt’s Twitter (I think).

The score is, and always will be, perfection.

Mobius’ small talk amuses me.

“Why do you get to keep all the trophies from my cases in here, you don’t think I’d love having that roller skate?” Mobius, what about the thing on the shelf behind your desk????

Ravonna seems like she’s answered these questions before, but she has a fondness for him that makes me think they’re good friends.

Also does Ravonna have multiple complete collections of the Encyclopaedia Britannica in her office? What are those books??

“I hope it’s a double.” Me too Mobius, me too (drink responsibly).

I don’t get how people think Mobius doesn’t remember leaving the stains. It sounded like Ravonna was chiding him for a bad habit and Mobius just made up a remark, not confusion.

Although he does place the cup at a different spot to the rings.

The ship flying past in the windows is a wonderful detail.

“The variant likes to stall for time.” It's very satisfying to me how everything stays relevant. Every detail advances the plot/contributes to it.

“Look, I know you have a soft spot for broken things.”

“I don’t think so-”

“Yes you do.”

Both Mobius and Ravonna only look at the middle figure when referring to the time Keepers. Either the other two are side-lined or don’t contribute at all.

“I’ll delete him myself.” At this point in time, I think Mobius is serious. As the episode progresses, his status may have changed, especially after the Jet Ski philosophy session.

Ravonna’s sash on the peg reminds me of the ones the people talking to Casey were wearing in episode 1.

Man those doors are so cool.

Peak sitting outside the principal’s office energy.

Mobius whistles at Loki as opposed to talking to him like he does later.

Any screen shot from the following scene is pristine chaotic disaster bi Loki energy featuring tired-of-your-tomfoolery Mobius.

“Isn’t that precisely why I’m here?” This marked a change in Loki to me. Up until that point, he’d tried to use what he’d known, who he’d been by scheming his way to the Time Keepers. By admitting he wasn’t sure of his purpose, we’re back with the person at the end of the last episode. It’s very Loki to try all avenues to get what he wants, and after having his world turned upside-down a few times in a short period, maybe he just wanted the familiarity of his old tricks, who he thinks he is.

Loki tensing up and then trying to assert control again reaffirms what I just said.

Man, give Mobius a holiday after all of this. Loki really tested him, huh?

Loki definitely likes validation on some level.

TVA archives (a.k.a the Salad Scene)

I can’t believe that place really exists. The looks combined with the music are just *chef kisses*.

I’m not sure if I’m thinking of the right progression, but the music reminds me of a plagal cadence. Google examples and play it side-by-side, you’ll get what I mean, maybe someone knows what it really is?

On either side of the elevators near the Time Keeper statues are the signs TVA archives.

The symmetry pleases my goblin brain.

I believe the entire show was just flexing the skills of the Loki crew and I couldn’t be happier.

“Pretend your life depends on it. I’m gonna get a snack.” This was so funny in the trailers but Mobius is dead serious (delete him myself comment). And he couldn’t even enjoy his salad.

Love that the end of credits takes from some of the scenes in episode 2.

The archivist has neat glasses.

I want some TVA stationary y’all.

It’s that moment fam.

I can’t be the only one curious by the ‘DISPLACED by 000:000:002:162’. Is that in Units? It would explain why the time line looks slightly bendy whenever we see it, especially if Apocalypses are so frequent.

IT’S THE SALAD LADS!

Mobius is reading the magazine that Loki was looking at earlier. Jet skis are Mobius’ comfort character.

“Don’t set fire to the palace.”

Tom Hiddleston has so much energy, he can move so fast.

“Oh God.” - Mobius, Null Time Zone

“YOU.” - Casey, Null Time Zone

Casey!

No thoughts, head empty, the Salad (TM).

But seriously, people only seem to be at their tables with others that work in a similar section. Not hunters and analysts eating in tandem to me, folks.

Oh Casey. Please don’t hurt him.

Aw, Mobius’ little giggle warmed my heart. Owen Wilson’s giving me whiplash with Mobius. My heart can’t take this y’all.

79 AD Pompeii, Italy

They’re both so giddy, Your Honour, I love them.

Mobius snuck them out lol.

“Bird noises?”

“BE FREE MY HORNED FRIENDS, BE FREE!” The post wouldn’t be complete without this.

Loki just throwing food at people and telling them “...enjoy your last meal while you can” is top tier comedy to me.

This is the first time we see Loki openly say nothing matters. I feel like the case file on the destruction of Asgard really pushed him to treat fate as unchangeable.

LXXIX is 79. Nice one Loki crew!

Mobius’ eye twitching as he checks the variance is a nice touch.

Loki throws away the stick that was holding the goat pen closed at the end.

TVA Archives, TVA cafeteria

Mobius picked up those files so smoothly I had to re-watch it.

Their position reflected what they were talking about - when Loki thinks it’s his individual contribution, he’s walking separately to Mobius, but they meet up when working together. I loved the blocking in that little moment.

I seriously thought that Loki was unconscious when I first saw him asleep around Mobius. I’ll admit it, it felt out-of-character for someone with such bad trust issues. Both of them seem pretty tired tho.

It’s the Jet Ski conversation comrades!

I’m beaming. Mobius talking about Jet Skis was the only time I’ve really remembered it’s Owen Wilson talking. It’s such a fun line to think about!

Loki’s smile. Adorable.

Just go watch the scene, it’ll give you good brain juices.

Mobius does it all for the Jet Skis and nothing else. I don’t make the rules, the Time Keepers do.

“My own glorious purpose.” This is a recurring theme in the season. Ultimately, I think that Loki is going to run for as long as it brings in money/until Loki gets killed again. However, I do like to think that in following seasons we’ll move beyond setting up Phase 4 Marvel stuff and just get deep dives into Loki’s character, though it may happen in the later eps or not be as interesting. Part of what made this show so interesting is the new setting in the Marvel universe but it’s hard to make predictions as to whether it will last in a show featuring the God of Mischief. Whatever happens, I’m happy that we got to see Loki’s existential crisis together, lads.

The music picks up, signalling that this quiet moment is about to end.

“No one bad is ever truly bad. And no one good is every truly good.”

“Scared little boy.”

These lines mean a lot to me. Loki perceives Mobius as an equal, similar to himself but not completely identical. The TVA’s whole aesthetic is Kafkaesque (Disney+ used that word), the imperfections keeping the place from looking mechanical and orderly like what the TVA promotes itself to be. Loki wants Mobius to acknowledge it, but Mobius is in the past, not addressing what’s right in front of him, surrounding him. That’s probably because Mobius doesn’t believe, he accepts what he’s been told though Loki wants to change that. He’s still focused on his job, the variant. I don’t think Mobius will struggle against change in the ‘belief’ part as long as things are rational.

Kate Herron (director) said that the Kablooie scene was improv which makes me wish we had more B roll of Owen and Tom. They seem so professional, invested and fun on set.

“No wonder you’re so bitter.” I’m sorry Mobius you sound as salty as your salad.

‘Artificially flavoured chewing gum’ Has something happened causing artificial flavouring to be preferred?

‘Blue’ has canonically changed to ‘Bloo’ by 2050 in America in the MCU. I blame capitalism.

Why does Mobius look so tiny? I say that like Owen Wilson wouldn’t look like a giant next to me lol.

Owen Wilson is 3.5 inches (9 centimetres) shorter than Tom Hiddleston. Yet he is dwarfed as Mobius. I need to stop talking about this and move on.

There’s no ‘variance energy detected’ line in the report.

“You’re gonna take my job if I’m not careful.” Loki looks so chuffed.

One day, I’ll properly address my thoughts on the shipping. Until then, I just want no one to die.

“Yeah, he’s doing great.” Mobius is so hyped. Good for him.

Owen Wilson has dimples.

Ravonna’s screen doesn’t show the timeline like it does later.

Ravonna is the done mom friend. Sane, undeserving of this, please give her a jet ski moment.

Buckle up folks because the last twenty minutes of this episode are my favourite so far.

At 34 minutes in, we get the music fading in with “Okay. But Mobius...” and a transition to my favourite composition so far. Natalie Holt outdid herself. The soundtrack is nearly constant, there’s no break for a moment of clarity anymore. The progression of events is inevitable, tying the bow on a plot line created in an hour and a half. The little embellishment from the strings (possibly) as Mobius and Loki exit is perfect. Combined with Loki’s raised fist leading to a pan to the ceiling, it prepared the audience for everything being turned upside down.

The changing camera angles and shot lengths (the continuous shot when B-15 takes the knives, the circling behind as the briefing occurs) keep viewers on their toes. The continuous shot is fluid, B-15 doesn’t look at Loki or Mobius, her reaction is natural and that just proves that the timing on that scene was impeccable. The circling behind reminded me of Loki positioning himself behind Mobius as he did earlier, but now he’s on the same side, part of the team though he continues to distinguish between himself and the variant. The building sensation that change is coming is met by the incredible swell in the music as we watch the picturesque Haven Hills get destroyed by modern technology and face the terrifying reality that is the Roxxcart store. There’s a close up on the Roxxcart storefront with school buses with the words ‘Evacuation shuttle’ in the background as we see the TVA’s minutemen come out reinforcing that even when the end is nigh, large corporations will loom over. A storm is raging with worse to come. I can go on and on, but you get the point.

2050 Roxxcart Disaster

I love that y’all are calling this the Alabama supermarket breakup. Makes me chuckle, that’s for sure.

I too hate when people can hear my footsteps. Someone that gets the struggle.

Sylvie places the TVA Samsung over a Roxxcart Security manual. She’s overridden both and is in control.

The date is 03/15/2050.

I think that the way the Hunters and minutemen hold their baton things is so that they don’t get yeeted. Neat.

As always, the beats are slick yo.

I hope the Azaleas guy gets some Azaleas wherever he ended up.

I love the way Loki says “In this storm.” It’s so satisfying for no real reason.

The wonderful Wunmi Mosaku does not get the recognition she deserves for this scene. She switched from B-15 to Sylvie so effortlessly. They’re two distinct characters, her facial expressions, body language everything changed in that instant. Even from the one line, “No, they usually survive,” her delivery had changed in a way that was noticeable. It’s uncanny, exactly what was needed when facing a foe that remained unseen. And the smile? It’s before we know the variant as Sylvie, so naturally it’s that signature Loki smile with a hint of malice we associate with the variant. Damn y’all, Wunmi’s incredible! I really hope she’s recognised for being so talented in this series, if not in all her other work!

Mobius really cares about those people. I really want his redemption (?) arc.

It’s been pointed out that even in those conditions, Roxxcart were selling blankets and water. I think it means that by 2050, cash would be defunct. If only electronic payment existed, as long as there’s electricity they can run a business. Chew on that.

If the man they speak to is 50 to 60, he was a 90s kid.

There must be a difference in the reprogramming or kind of variant selected to be a hunter as compared to an analyst. The Hunters look after their own, but the analysts (or Mobius) go as far as empathising with variants.

C-20 is sitting in front of safety standards.

“A bit amateurish.” Loki knows that the variant isn’t as skilled with magic as he is.

As Loki and the possessed people walk, the lighting becomes brighter. He’s moving out of the shadows.

Me too Loki, I’m worried about B-15 too.

Sylvie unironically saying bless is hilarious.

Randy must be hella tall.

There’s a low angle shot as Loki and Randy face off with the flickering light above with a sign hanging above them like a sword of Damocles and a physical separation. Terror is nearly constant in Loki's life now, but he responds by letting go of his drive to survive.

The subtle swells in the music just add to my rising blood pressure.

C-20’s voice over is sad lads.

“I wanna go home,” we know she’s not referring to the TVA.

Mobius seems like a caring person.

When B-15 sits up and searches the room, I think it’s her realisation. Her shiver was from fear and shock, the music wasn’t about her not seeing Loki, it was about the TVA and what had happened to her.

The head snap and the score timing matching. So satisfying.

“I would never treat me like this. Hi.” I think that’s Loki realising that his foe is not willing to talk their way through conflict.

This fight scene contradicts all the magic we see later ik, but if he didn’t want to hurt anyone and was trying to draw out the real enemy it made sense.

Some of Sylvie’s powers must come into the people she possesses. The guy punched a glass screen and didn’t even bleed.

“I have shit to do.” Sylvie wasn’t raised with court etiquette (from what we know) and her lexical choice reflects that.

Dell computers survive into 2050 in the MCU. So do those robot dogs and Roombas. I am only happy about the Roombas. Where did the real dogs go? :(

“Mobius.”

“Where is he?”

“I lost him.”

“What happened?”

“I...”

Until now, B-15’s delivery has felt slightly rhythmic, like she was used to having the same arguments, particularly with Mobius. When she trails off however, I think it’s her trying to rationalise what she’s been through with Sylvie’s possession. Her devotion to the TVA was rooted in the fact that she wasn’t a variant, her life had a purpose and it was intentional. This must have rocked her, I’m invested in where she’ll go.

THE CUT TO BLACK OH GOOD GOSH.

Sylvie, my queen. I’d roll off a cliff for her.

The person with the moustache (you know the one) has pure fear on his face.

Ravonna knows what’s up.

And so do you, yes it’s the music, go listen to it.

THE RED LIGHTING

The zoom out to that incredible hallway shot and then stopping behind the time door. It was never about him after all, he was in the background of her plans.

Sylvie’s wave in Roxxcart vs. Loki’s on the train. Discuss.

The blackout, thunder and Loki’s pause under the flickering red and white light, do y’all really want me to talk about the s y m b o l i s m????

He’s conflicted, you know it, I know it, Mobius knows it.

Speaking of Mobius, there he is, we cut back to Loki and see him make his decision, zooming back in on him.

And with that final flourish in the score, we are done with episode 2!

Cue the most amazing end credits score you’ll ever hear.

Do yourself a favour, listen to all of it, including the part after the main credits, both are Works. Of. Art.

Ep 2 review

In case you didn’t notice, this is my favourite episode so far. There are parts I didn’t take to as much, but details from the previous episode being used in the plot as well as others being explained by Sylvie in episode 3. Rewatching it was easier than episode 1 though it left me wanting more. It will get more interesting from here, but until then, that was a fun romp.

See y'all next time. I hope whoever's reading this has a wonderful day!

Part 1, Episode 1 extend review link:

[glenncoco4]

Choices

Alternate plot to 9x23

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kensi tries as best as she can to hold back her tears as she, Sam and Callen continue to layout their plan. She’s not sure if they’re tears of anger or sadness but what she does know is that she’s never felt so defeated in her life. 

Walking out the mission door, she heads to the Audi for her go bag. 

Just as she walks back into the bullpen she sees the tech operator running down the stairs. “Kens.”

She takes a deep breath, whatever he’s about to say she really doesn’t want to hear it right now. Get the kid and get back is all she’s focused on. “Not now, Eric.”

“It’s Deeks.”

“Just tell him I’m busy.” Her focus stays on the map before her as she goes over the mission plan one more time in her head.

“Kensi.”

The tone in his voice catches her off-guard and she quickly turns her attention the blonde whose got an unsettled look on his face. “What?” 

For a brief moment he’s paralyzed. He can’t get out the words that so desperately need to be spoken.

“Eric, what happened?” Kensi abandons the bullpen and is about to come up the stairs when his next words stop her in her tracks. 

“I just heard over the scanner…Deeks was driving home and his truck got t-boned by a semi.”

No. No. This is not happening. “What?”

“Kensi, I don’t-“ A ringing interrupts him, cutting him off from finishing the rest of his sentence. 

Quickly pulling her phone out of her pocket, the brunette answers, combing her fingers through her hair worriedly. “Mikey, how is he?”

“It’s not looking good, Kensi.”

She paces back and forth in front of the bullpen trying to gather as much  information as she can before getting behind the steering wheel. “Where are they taking him?”

“Cedars.”

“I’m on my way.” With out saying another word she walks as fast as she can down the tunnel. She’s got to get to him.

Callen brow furrows in concern when he sees a distraught Kensi sprint towards her car and quickly walks over to her before she has time to drive off. “What’s going on?”

Her voice shakes answering him but not turning to look at him as she hops into the drive seat. “Deeks got t-boned by a semi.”

“Go. We have this handled.”

She starts the car with one last parting before driving off into the dark early morning streets of LA. “Thanks, but I was going with or without your permission.”

XXXX

She rushes into the ER looking around the chaotic room when she finally spots him. “Oh my god.”

A frazzled nurse walks up to her alerted when she sees the tears in Kensi’s eyes. “Excuse me, miss, can I help you?”

Kensi’s eyes stay focused on Deeks’ still form as a swarm of doctors and nurses poke and prod at his body. “That’s my fiancé.”

“Oh.” 

“Is he going to be okay?”

“Right now he’s stable but they have to rush him into emergency surgery. A large piece of glass nicked his heart.”

She takes a few strides meeting the gurney as they begin wheeling him down the hallway. Taking hold of his free hand, she has to say something, something that will keep him fighting. “Deeks. Baby, I need you to fight. I need you to fight because I can’t lose you.  I love you so much. Just fight like I know-“

Before she can get another word out the heart monitor goes crazy and she’s pushed aside by a nurse as she grabs the other side of the gurney and they charge the double doors towards the OR. “He’s crashing. Code blue.”

Those are the last words she hears before he’s pushed around the corner and suddenly out of sight. Her legs give out and she crumples against the wall, burrowing her face in her hand. He can’t die. Not now, not ever. 

XXXX

She hasn’t been able to sit down for the past 2 hours. Her mind is all over the place wondering how he’s doing.

“Miss. Blye?”

She quickly spins around at the sound of her name and walks over towards the doctor. “How is he?”

The redhead woman smiles reassuringly at the brunette putting Kensi somewhat at ease. “We almost lost him but he’s stable now. As you know a piece of glass nicked his heart, luckily it wasn’t that large and we were able to close the wound fairly quick. He’s also got a broken arm and some internal bleeding, but he’s gonna make it.”

“Can I see him?”

“Gives us about 20 minutes and I’ll have a nurse bring you to his room.”

Kensi shakes the woman’s hand unbelievably grateful that the man she loves is still breathing. “Thank you, doctor.”

XXXX

6 hours later

He slowly opens his eyes, becoming aware of his surroundings and the incessant beeping in his left ear. As he scans the room his gaze stops when it lands on a the familiar head of hair and the most beautiful face he’s ever laid his eyes on. Her eyes are closed and he suddenly realizes that the last time he saw those mismatched chocolate orbs that he so deeply loves were full of tears. 

That could’ve been the last time he ever got to see her and it terrifies him. 

His eyes roam her features taking her in, her head laying on top of his hand with her ring proudly displayed on her left hand which is kinda surprising to him. 

At the feeling of movement she startles awake, tears already springing to her eyes when she sees his beautiful cerulean blues. “Shouldn’t you be in Mexico?”

“Are you insane? You almost died, why on earth would I be in Mexico right now?” She can’t hide the sadness in her voice at his assumption. How could he think for one minute that she would be off in some other country when he needed her.

“I just thought-“

“No, Deeks, no. I love you and I know we have some things to work out and we may fight some times but know this…if I ever have to choose between you and the job, I’m choosing you.”

“That didn’t seem like the case earlier.” He looks down at their intertwined fingers, his eyes focusing on her ring as he rubs his thumb across the diamonds. 

“Well, I was just frustrated earlier and…”

“And what?”

“I was scared.”

He looks up so fast that he almost gives himself whiplash. “Baby, why on earth were you scared? You have nothing to be afraid of.”

Seeing the concern in his eyes, she bites her lip worried about what might come tumbling out. “Well I was and it has everything to do with you.”

“Me?”

“You just had our whole life planned out and you started talking about having kids.”

His brow furrows he’s not really sure if its the anesthesia that’s making it hard for him to follow or what. 

“And I know you want kids, I do too.”

“You-you do?”

“Of course I do but you have to understand that it’s different for women especially women in our line of work. I love my job, you know how much I love my job.”

“I do know.”

A teary eyed smile crosses her face when he places his hand against her cheek. It may be cheesy but just the feel of his touch gives her the courage and strength to gather her feelings and tell him what’s been running around in her head for so long. “But I love you more and that scares me. Ever since my dad died I’ve only had myself to rely on and I’ve never counted on anyone else for my happiness. For a long time NCIS was my happiness, I knew that I would be content in the life I had if I got to help others, but then I fell in love with you. We got engaged and I was happy-am happy. Bringing kids into our life would make me even more happy but then while I was trying to talk to Mosley to calm her down she said something to me that struck a nerve.”

“What did she say to you?”

“I told her that maybe one day I would understand…but she took it a different way than what I meant. It rattled me because it’s happened to us before.”

Now he’s really confused. “What do you mean?”

“Remember our conversation after you got tortured?”

“The one in the bullpen?”

A soft smile crosses her features when she thinks back to that day, the good part of that day when he told her that she was what got him through probably the most painful time in his life but her smile quickly disappears at the reason for his need to focus on her. “Yeah, I said I know what you’re going through and you said you hope that I never do but a few months later I did.”

That’s when everything starts to makes sense. The way she suddenly changed her mind or rather off-put about the thought of having kids. “And you think the same thing would happen to our kid as Mosley’s.”

She looks down afraid of the disappointment that she may see in his eyes.  “I know its irrational but-“

“No, no it’s not.” His heart breaks at the smallness in her voice. He places his finger under her chin, tilting her head up so that she’ll look at him. “Don’t hit me for what I’m about to say but you sound just like a mother.”

“I do?”

“Kens, the fact that you’re worried about the wellbeing for our hypothetical child - baby, that’s what every good parent goes through. What you’re feeling is normal, I just wish you would talk to me about it.”

“What do think I’m doing now?” Her lip curls into a smirk.

He huffs a laugh. God he loves this woman. “Touché.”

There’s a beat of silence as their eyes stay locked before he finally works up the nerve to ask her. “So we’re gonna work this out?”

She shakes her head. They’re a mess but they’re a perfect mess. “We were never not gonna work this out. But I need you do something for me.”

“You know I’d do anything for you.”

“Promise you’ll be patient with me.”

He rolls his eyes because even though she’s being completely serious right now he knows she needs a good laugh. “Please, I’ve been patient with you ever since I met you.”

She scrunches her noses knowing exactly what he’s trying to do. Standing up, she scoots closer towards the head of the bed, her hand finding the scruff of his jaw. 

He lays his hand atop of her and relishes in the feel of her touch. “I need you to promise me something too.”

“Anything.”

“Promise me you’ll marry me and spend the rest of your life with me.”

This time when the tear falls down her cheek its from happiness…pure elation. She leans forward bringing her lips to his. It’s not the most passionate kiss they’ve ever had, but they have all the time in the world for that. “I can do that.”

“I love you.” He leans in for another kiss, smiling.

Once their lips part they don’t lose contact for long as she places her forehead against his. “I love you.”

[kalypsichor]

oh darling [ beatles x reader ]

summary: backstage on the England leg of your tour, you meet the four Liverpool boys of your dreams

prompt: can i request a reader who’s a musician/singer and a big beatles fan so they sing their favorite songs at a concert (my peronal faves are “honey pie”, “oh, darling!” or “for no one”, but you can choose!) and the boys were secretly there!! the boys meet them after the show and the reader just loses it?? maybe some romance?? warnings: too much backstory, badly researched 60s slang

i’m fudging the timeline around so that in this fic oh! darling was released in the early 60s instead of in abbey road and reader is meeting them in the mid 60s. reader is american and I incorporated some romance but left it open-ended. more notes at the end!

masterlist

This is what you love most about touring. A thousand faces shining with the glow of the stage in dark concert halls; the satisfying dig of guitar strings into your fingertips; each inhale of breath that rushes into your lungs and is converted to notes ringing with clarity, clashing with dissonance; and the raw electricity of it all.

As the last chord of the song fades into the air, you allow yourself a giddy, adrenaline-fueled smile. The crowd roars and stomps their feet and you can feel the ground vibrating underneath your feet. It takes a while to get them to quiet down, and when they finally do, you lean in towards the mic.

“I’d like to thank y’all again for coming to tonight’s show!” Cue more screaming. “We’re going to close out with a song by a band you probably haven’t heard of— very underground, very obscure, you know. One of your lot. This is Oh! Darling.”

The crowd erupts into more cheers and you allow yourself to reminisce about the first time you’d heard this song on the radio. A few years younger and without a nickel to your name, your band had been just a hobby during the off-seasons of school. In the sweltering New Orleans summer, crammed into a friend’s garage, you wrote and played songs inspired by the local rhythm and blues so popular at the time. It was all just for your own enjoyment, of course— you didn’t think that anyone outside of Louisiana would like your kind of music. But you loved the slow grinding tempos and the strong backbeats that were so fun to dance to, even if you and your bandmates were the only ones who’d ever sing or dance to them.

Until, of course, you changed a radio station one day and suddenly heard that very same rhythm and blues from some internationally known band called The Beatles. “Well,” you said, turning to your bandmates, “if some pasty English boys can play it on the radio, why can’t we?” So the band began booking gigs at local bars, then theaters, then across the world as its popularity grew. All the while, you fell in love with the English band, buying every new record and learning your favorites on guitar.

And here you were on tour in Britain years later, living a dream you could barely believe. A giddy smile spreads across your face as you realize the enormity of being here at all, thousands of miles away from home and singing the song that started it all. Your fingers pluck the familiar strings and you feel yourself settle into a nostalgic beat.

Oh! Darling, please believe me I’ll never do you no harm…

When it’s over and you take your last bow, sweat beads your face and neck and you want nothing more than a cold shower and a bottle of champagne. The din of cheers and claps follows you into the wings of the stage where your manager waits with an odd smile on her face.

“Some people here to see you,” she says. You grab a cup of water from one of the assistants and down it like, well, water.

“I thought we weren’t letting fans backstage today.”

“Yes, but these aren’t the usual fans. They’re… you have to see for yourself.”

You set down the glass, already wishing you were in bed. “Look, Grace, I’m sorry but it’s just not a good time. I don’t care if it’s the Kennedy’s or Jesus Christ himself, tell them to come back later.”

“It’s been said that we’re bigger than Jesus, y’know.”

If you turned your head any faster you would’ve gotten whiplash. That familiar Scouse accent that you’ve only heard in records and interviews… but there was no way it was—

“John Lennon?” It’s your drummer, Thomas, who speaks. “You’re John Lennon. God, that’s unreal. I’m talking to John fucking Lennon.”

“Oh, don’t mind us, we’re just backdrop,” grumbles one of the other three. He’s got dark, intense eyes under heavy brows and a mop of hair. This is George Harrison in the flesh and blood, and he would seem very serious if it weren’t for his toothy, almost canine grin. You feel a thrill race down your spine from the almost predatory look that he gives you.

Kate, the bassist, peers over your shoulder. “Y’all are a lot shorter in person,” she comments. Then, quietly to you, “Close your mouth, honey. You’re catching flies out here.”

You really hope you’re not drooling. It’s no big deal, right? Except that your idols are standing right in front of your eyes, mop-tops and all. You suddenly become hyper-aware of how your hair is plastered to your face and yet somehow also sticking up in eighty different directions. Why didn’t you use more product? More importantly, why haven’t you said a single word yet? They must think you’re some kind of idiot. Okay, do something before it becomes awkward. A handshake! A handshake is good.

You stick out a trembling hand. “Hi,” you say, voice breathy and high like some kind of schoolgirl with a crush.

Too late, you realize that there’s no way all four of them can shake your hand, idiot, and you’ve already come up with four different ways to fake your own death and never speak to anyone again when Paul McCartney (Paul! Freaking! McCartney!) takes your palm with a gentle but steady grasp. He brings it to his lips in a mock bow, eyes peering up under fluttering eyelashes.

“M’lady.”

(Is this what cardiac arrest feels like?)

“Down, boy!” John pats the back of the bassist’s head, smirking, and before you can mourn the loss of his touch they’ve begun bickering like an old married couple.

A different hand takes yours. Thick, calloused fingers. Cold metal rings press into your skin. “Don’t mind them, they’re children. I’m Ringo.” And here was Ringo Starr with the signature grin. Something about his sweet, wide smile makes you relax instinctively. He’s just human, like you. They all are. Underneath the fame and fortune, you’re all just messy humans with a love for music. And with that realization, you let yourself settle back into your usual self.

“They’re not so bad,” you say. “I’ve seen worse. At least they’re potty trained, right?”

This gets an adorable laugh from him as well as George, the latter of which had been talking to Kate about guitars until now.

“Great job up there, by the way.” You blush at the compliment and George goes on, “Those are some wicked brilliant riffs! You’ve got to show them to me sometime.”

“What, and let you steal our band’s secrets? You’ll have to try a little harder than that, mister.”

The three of you fall into an easy banter, mostly gushing about each others’ musicianship. Eventually, John and Paul break their fight, realizing that they’re no longer the center of attention.

“Sorry ‘bout that,” John says a little breathlessly, still laughing from something Paul said. You try not to notice how pink his cheeks are or the way his hair falls perfectly into his eyes from the toustling. “Say, why don’t we take this somewhere with a booth and at least three pints of alcohol?”

“There’s a pub two blocks down,” Paul chimes in, “and they always let us take the back door. The fans can get crazy, y’know.”

Pru, the other lead vocalist, swings an arm around your shoulder and answers before you can. “Sounds boss. I’m ready to split if you are, mop-tops.”

They look confusedly at one another and you huff, elbowing her in the ribs. “What she means is that we’d be delighted to go. Right, Pru?”

She scoffs something along the lines of stuffy Brits but nods. With that, the two bands begin making their way to the exits, melding into one raucous group of overlapping conversations. Before you can make it there, however, your manager grabs you by the arm and looks you in the eye with a steely glare.

“I better not being seeing your face in the papers tomorrow.”

You roll your eyes. “Okay, Mom.”

“And be back at the hotel before three! You’ve all got interviews in the morning and I do not want another situation like Toronto on my hands. You hear me?”

“That reporter was a sexist pig and I meant what I said. Also, I wasn’t that hungover!”

“Don’t worry, ma’am,” George pipes up, “We’ll get her back in one piece. Maybe two, if we’re unlucky.”

You pat Grace’s hand and her glare softens. “Alright, get outta my sight.” She waves a hand and walks off, already rattling off instructions a mile a minute at some poor intern.

“Is yours like that too?” you ask, looking after Grace fondly as she picks up a costume rack without slowing down. If the terrified look on the intern’s face is any indication, she’s still berating him to high hell.

“Honestly,” George replies, “I think all managers are. Mum away from home, y’know. Eppy’s always right and it’s annoying as hell.”

You share a knowing smile before surging on to catch up with the group already at the door. John’s at the lead. Elbowing your way through, you make your way to his side.

“It’s a side entrance so it shouldn’t be too bad,” he says, pushing on the handle.

Immediately, a barrage of sound smacks you in the face hard enough to do a double-take. Apparently, you and every other person in London knew about the side entrance because you’re met with a sea of clamoring fans. Heads turn toward the opened door in a mesmerizing, horrifying ripple of motion. Someone mutters a heartfelt fuck under their breath. It’s probably you.

“There she is!” a girl screams.

“I love you! I LOVE YOU!”

“Is that the Beatles?”

“MARRY ME PAUL! I WANT YOUR BABIES!”

Amidst the chaos, someone intertwines their fingers in yours. It’s John. He looks down at you with a boyish grin and, not for the first time, you lose a bit of yourself in his gaze. The other three boys share the same wild glint in their eyes. He leans close until his lips brush your ear and for a moment you let yourself believe that you’re alone with him and nobody else.

“This is the part where we run, darling.”

And so you do.

notes: because i’m horny for music history, i spent way too much time researching oh! darling’s musical composition. the song is heavily influenced by new orleans rhythm and blues as well as louisiana swamp blues, music styles originating from african-americans/creoles/cajuns in the 50s (read more about it here!). so in my mind, reader is of the same ethnic background as the music she creates, but you’re free to interpret it however you want! 

[pretty-restless-insomniac]

Say Something (W.C. 1,842)

Fandom: Riverdale

Pairing: Sweet Pea / Reader

Rating: Teen and Up

Warnings: Cussing, Underage Drinking

Summary: Sweet Pea never thought he would be so f***ing ruined by a girl, but here he is, clutching the phone to his ear praying to anyone listening that you would pick up.

*Can be read as sequel to “I’m Not Her” or can be read alone*

Click Here for Ao3  or Click Keep Reading for on here!

     Sweet Pea never thought he would be so fucking ruined by a girl, but here he is, clutching the phone to his ear praying to anyone listening that you would pick up.

    "Hey this is y/n, I'm not around to pick up bu-"

    "Damn it!" He punches the red call button and leans back against his headboard, phone tossed away and his hands tugging through his hair. It's been a week since you walked out and he feels as if he's going fucking insane without you. The only other times he's cried so hard were when his parents abandoned him as a kid, and when he nearly lost his best friend. But this was different. When he's gone through hard times before, he had you. You were the light of his life and his fuck-up caused him to be alone. Sweet Pea struggles to swallow around the lump in his throat, eyes burning from continuous tears. He's a mess.

    He needs you. He knows that now. With you he felt powerful, attractive, safe... loved. But you're gone, and he feels like he might die from the aching in his chest, from every single fucking memory of you two running through his head. Beer, he needs a beer, multiple. Pea wobbles on his feet and slowly makes his way into the catastrophe of which is his den. He took all of his pain out on the trailer for the first three days, and it shows. Pea pushes the flipped couch out of his way, eyes trained on the dinky fridge that hold his newest best friend. Said fridge is bare of all edible substances aside from the four 6-packs Fang's gifted him when he heard of the breakup. Fuck, even the word makes his heart spasm. He grabs a bottle and pops it open, leaning against the counter. He takes a long swig, welcoming the bitter taste. 

          Pea doesn't know how much longer he could live like this. Hell, he's had to hold himself back from running to your house even if it's just to catch a glance at you. Because he sees everything but you anymore. The coat hook, empty. His shower void of all your soaps, your side of the closet... bare. He feels like you're a ghost now and he's frantic to just prove that you were ever in his life at all! But the loneliness that's slowly suffocating Pea proves that you are very much real. You were his, for a short while, but he was the one that never took 'being yours' seriously. He remembers your face when you begged him to just be honest about how he feels for you, that he loves you. But he couldn't. Not because of anything other than he's a coward that doesn't deserve you. He remembers when Betty and Jughead came to get the things you left behind, Jones had to almost sit on him so Betty could come in and out safely, taking all he had left of you.

      Pea starts to shake as the next wave of this ever-lasting mental breakdown comes upon him. He wishes this was all just some stupid fucking nightmare and he would wake up to you squirming away from his snores in your ear. He would let you go, but before you could get off the bed, he's grab you back and crawl on top of you. He'd whisper all the naughty things he wanted to do to you, watching the lust dance across your eyes. Pea would nearly lose it as you let out a little moan, grinding against his bottom half, him kissing your neck-

    "God fucking damn it!" Pea wails his bottle against the wall and slowly slides down to the floor, begging someone -anyone - to put him out of his misery.

    "Fuck, y/n," his voice cracking into uncontrollable sobs. He can't be bothered to try to make his way into the bed as his vision darkens, finally giving into exhaustion on the glass ridden tile. 

      A little while later, a few forceful pounds on his door stirs Pea out of his drunken stupor, but only to groan, hoping if he stays somewhat quiet that whoever out there will get the fucking hint. He wants to suffer, alone. Pea imagines you're doing the same thing, at least he hopes you're as broken up about this as he is. Soon the bangs stop, but before he could slip away again, a powerful shove sends his door nearly off its hinges, no doubt cracking the frame. Pea nearly uses all of his energy to sit up, seeing double of a certain purple haired vixen. Fuck he want her seeing him like this. He tries to scramble to his feet as Toni looks around in shock.

    "What the hell did you do? I was expecting a mess, but it's like a fucking war zone Pea!"

    "Why are you here?"

    "You're joking right? You haven't left here in a week and you've been ignoring every single person who's tried to get you. I'm the last resort!"

    Pea just lolls his head back against the counter and closes his eyes, trying to block out the spinning room.

    "Fuck off." Toni just snorts at that and makes her way into the kitchen, only sighing at the broken glass. Neither of them speak as she fetches the broom to clean it up. Soon she just slumps down next to Pea, slightly gagging at the alcohol rolling off of him in waves. Pea just hopes she'll get bored with his silence and just leave, but Toni just plays with her bracelet, trying to find the right words.

    "Do, do you want to talk about it?"  Pea finally turns to look at her, and she flinches slightly at his bloodshot eyes and red skin, making it clear how broken he feels right now. She's at a loss, never having seen him so torn up over something before. He usually is so good at burying his feels, so having his face being so easy to read shakes her a little.

    "Have you seen her?"       Toni takes a deep breath, hesitating a little before giving a solemn nod. She can't stand to look at him as she continues.

    "Yeah, I've seen her around lately." Pea swallows and then asks the inevitable.

    "H-how is she?"

    "She-e was very upset before, but-" Toni cuts off taking more interest in her jeans at the moment. Pea's anger spikes again as he shoves her shoulder.

    "But?" Toni just sighs and runs her fingers through her hair. 

     "I don't think you want to know-"

    "Quit fucking around."

    "She-s, she's... happy." Pea whips his head around, furrowing his brows. What the fuck does she mean you're happy. You should be a hermit, constantly crying like he is. You were never a good liar, so he's sure you aren't faking, but, but that just pisses him off! How fucking dare you being happy without him.

    "Happy? Happy! Are you fucking serious?!" Anyone else would be shocked, but Toni would expect this. Still, she couldn't help being a bit coy.

    "I though you're supposed to say that you're just happy because she's happy and all that sappy shit." He only just glares and then turns to face the wall.

    "No. I don't want her happy unless she's with me. I'm a selfish mother fucker. Who the fuck does she think she is? She should be wallowing in sadness and alcohol like I am, not fucking acting like she's celebrating! If she was here right now I'd-"

    "But shes not. And she's not your fucking problem anymore, so your opinion means shit."

     Pea just puts his head down, accepting the loss just a little more. Toni feels bad at cutting his rant off, but for Pea, being drunk and angry wouldn't do anyone good! She stands up and reaches her hand out to him. He stumbles to his feet and they make the journey to the bedroom. Pea just flops face down to the bed and Toni just stands there, unsure if it's safe to leave him right now.  

   "You don't have to fucking babysit me, I'm not gonna do anything stupid." Pea mumbles from his pillow. Knowing how Pea is when he's drunk, Toni just shifts and then grabs him a glass of water, and leaves with a final worried glance. Pea tries to fall back asleep, but Toni's words keep ringing through his head.  

   "She's happy."   

  He doesn't know if its the loneliness or alcohol that leads him to try calling you again, already expecting the same voicemail message.

      "What do you want Pea?"

    He nearly falls off the bed at the sound of your voice, you picked up! He fumbles with words and you only huff at the silence, ready to hang up.    

 "No,wait, y/n. I-I've been trying to get ahold of you," and then he pauses... the anger kicking in, "why the fuck haven't you been answering me?" He doesn't need to see you to know you're doing an eyeroll right about now.     

"Why the hell do you care? I'm not your girl Pea, so it's none of your business. Did you call just to fucking chew me out? Me life doesn't revolve around you anymore."  

   Pea takes a deep breath, eyes starting to blur with tears.

    "No-no. I'm sorry I didn't mean to- I, uh, I just," he takes a moment to collect himself, "I just really miss you... I lo-"

    "Don't say you love me."

    "W-what the fuck do you mean? Why not? Are you with someone," Pea rambles. His emotions giving both of you whiplash. You just ignore his ramble, trying to keep your voice steady.

    "Because with you, every time you say you love me, it means a little less."

    Your voice nearly cracks, and you wince, hoping he hadn't caught it. But he did, and it gave him hope to push a little more.

    "So you just want me to forget about you, about us? There definitely has to be someone else, who the fuck is he. Is it Andrews? Mantle?"

    "Oh just shut up Pea, can't you just accept that maybe I'd rather bealone than with you? Do you think I'm that much of a floozy?"

    "Fine, if that's how you feel. Then do this one thing for me. Then I'll leave you alone, you won't hear a fucking peep from me. Just, swear to me that this mean nothing to you."

    You nearly choke on your cries, but you know what he's doing. He playing you, even now.

    "That's not the po-"

    "I want an answer, dammit!"

    "You aren't gonna get the answer you want Pea."

    "Lie to me then."

    You need to stay strong, to prove that you will survive without him. That you don't need him.      

    "Don't call this number again."

    "Y/n, I'll keep calling for the rest of the night if I have to, until you answer me."

    "Guess you'll have a long night then."   

    You left him once again that night.

[mobius-prime]

23. Special - Sonic the Hedgehog in Your Face!

Previous / Table of Contents / Next

Oh dear GOD what am I looking at?! That's some serious mood whiplash after the last issue's ending.

Anyway, this is our first special issue, and it's extra long! Time to strap in.

Princess Sally's Crusade - Conclusion (The Quest)

Writers: Mike Kanterovich and Ken Penders Pencils: Art Mawhinney Colors: Barry Grossman

This story, like every other story with Penders' name on it, may list two different people as the writers, but really, it has Penders' mitts aaaallllllllll over it. This is the very first time we see the introduction of the Light Mobius timeline, though it's not named as such yet, and boy, we'll be seeing it again, many more times. But for now, onward!

Sally's been distracted ever since Julayla's death, and since Julayla has left her everything she owned, it's Sally's task now to go through it all. She finds a neat blue vest - which finally completes her look - as well as a strange map, which she resolves to look at tomorrow. That night, she's awakened by some strange noises, which turn out to be coming from the white ball - which dissolves into:

Eyy, took her long enough to show up! It's Nicole the artificial intelligence, and Sally's new best friend. After consulting Julayla's map, Sally discovers it leads her into the Forbidden Zone, a strange and deadly place where not even Robotnik himself will tread out of fear. Sally's determined to do this herself - with Nicole at her side - but of course, the rest of the team doesn't like being left out of things.

And so, with the Tornado as their ride (oh hey! There it is!) they fly to their drop zone, where they evade Robotnik's patrols and head into the Forbidden Zone itself. Rotor stays behind, as the pilot, but everyone else makes it in safely. And now, begin the challenges! First, they face a terrifying cyclops, which they defeat through the power of… not doing anything!

…fair enough! Next up is a ferocious griffin, which Tails attempts to fight, as he's the only one in the group who can fly. However, he needs a weapon, and so spotting a sword in a pedestal nearby he attempts to free it. Hey, any of this sounding familiar?

After this monster also is defeated in an unconventional manner, they're up against the final challenge: the classic "two heads, two doors" question.

Sally, being the quick study that she is, figures out the answer easily (ask one head what the other would counsel, then do the opposite), and they proceed through the correct door to the final room. There, they find a chest on a pedestal, a chest which unexpectedly contains a single scrap of paper - and at this point, we're suddenly thrust into a flashforward, which takes us forward a full two decades.

Sonic and Sally are married now - for real this time - and have two children together. Bunnie's been deroboticized, Sally's father is alive and well, and Robotnik was defeated in a decisive battle some time ago. And, amazingly, we finally find out where Nicole came from - the future!

That's right - Nicole was invented by Rotor in the future, after she was tragically destroyed in the final fight against Robotnik. And though future-Sally is delighted to see her again, she knows Nicole can't stay. After all, there's a stable time loop to be created, and she's at the beginning of it.

It's actually quite touching, if you ask me. This story sort of touches on the idea that it's not the destination, but the journey that makes you who you are, and the idea of "a gift to myself, from myself" is quite a nice one. But, as the end slide notes, this is only one possible future, and we're a long way away from seeing this come to pass. So looks like we'll be dealing with Robotnik's ugly mug for a while yet. Darn!

Tails' Tallest Tale

Writer/Pencils: Scott Shaw! Colors: Barry Grossman

Hey, remember Scott? He hasn't made an appearance since the very first couple of issues, and back then he was just the penciller. Now he's doing the story as well! Great to have you in the writer's seat, Scott!

Sonic claims in the first panel that this is Tails' first solo story, but c'mon, we know that's not true! He's had at least a couple before now. Tails is on his way to the local Sonic-Con, an event I would absolutely love to attend myself if only it existed. In lieu of Sonic himself making a personal appearance, the club decided having Tails make a speech would be the next best thing. Yay, Tails is finally getting some of the attention he deserves! While on his way, a toad scares him and he falls into a stream. Not a big deal, but when he arrives and realizes he forgot to actually prepare a speech…

Woo! Go Tails! He sure is a badass in his imagination - that's how it goes for most kids, I guess.

However, in the middle of his speech, who shows up to crash the party but… well, I'll let you fill in the blanks, it's a neverending cycle by now. No one there knows how to fight… except Tails, of course! If his speech is anything to go by, he has more than enough battle skill to take Robotnik down, right? Right?

Hey man, he tried. Give him some credit at least.

However, he can't give up. Everyone is still in danger, and so with lives at stake, Tails comes up with maybe one of the first real Tails-esque plans of the comic's run so far. If he can't defeat him with brawn, he'll use his brains!

And just like that, Robotnik is rendered so dizzy, he's unable to fight anymore, and runs away to get some sleep. Hooray for Tails' first real victory against Robotnik!

And just like that, we're at the end of the comic's very first double-length special! We're back to regular issues tomorrow, but there's a lot more of these to come.

[amazildoessomethingstupid]

Chapter 96: Unspoken Rule

Man I thought it would be a lot longer before I did another of these, but as it turns out I fucking hate in between pages.  Y’know, those pages between the actual good and interesting shit?  Y’know the parts that are in between the fun parts, but you have to have them to actually move characters to the good parts? The parts that are boring and filler?  Yeah as an artist/writer I hate those too and it took me most of the week to come up with a page to make it not boring as sin.  Sadly this means, ANOTHER RANT!  And this time we are taking a look at Unspoken Rule. But before we do, I’d like to share with you the bit of panic that set in and what kind of pressure I had on me when trying to force an update.  For a second I thought that this rant was going to be about…

And I was very, very, scared.

Thankfully a friend notified me that I don’t know how to count, so we’re talking about this chapter instead!  Boy what a relief that was, I thought.  But it seemed a bit disappointing.  I hadn’t heard anything of this page, seems like it’ll be a short rant.  That won’t do.  So I figured, “hey if there’s not much to say.  Fuck it, we’ll do a double feature with the carnival…”

Sadly, I have something to say.

And we start with a good lighthearted joke.  Although, that expression in the first panel throws it off a bit.  The dialogue on the initial read says snark and sassy, but the face says honest concern, but then we show it is snarky.  So the face is just, confusing.  Not worth kicking up a fuss about, but definitely a headscratcher.

Anyway, on to what’s actually happening.  Which is Mike is being nervous and back and forth about wanting to talk to Lucy and apologize.  And it’s so weird to me.  This is such a serious plot point, and major conflict in the story, yet this is played for laughs. And not even good laughs, just hollow jokes it feels almost tasteless.  But not as tasteless as this:

BIG OOF  

Alright guys, see this?

I am absolved of this being uncharacteristically brash and open.  If Taeshi can do that kind of rudeness, so can I.  Lucy is just so cold now, it feels bad.  Not out of character, not unrealistic, just…bad.

But moving from that, we get into these two.   And…

Awww…th-this is actually pretty sad. And engaging.

HEY! I SEE YOU REACHING FOR MY HEARTSTRINGS! YOU STAY THE FUCK AWAY!

But seriously, this a very nice scene. It’s kind of touching, and it’s a moment I wish we had more of.  

It’s…actually very nice. The characters are finally airing their grievances, and we’re getting somewhere. I…I actually like th-

OH YOU BACKSTABBING, HACK WRITING, BITCH! ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS RIGHT NOW?!

WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?! WHY ARE YOU STICKING YOUR DICK IN A GAS STATION MILKSHAKE?! BITCH,

ARE YOU FUCKING F’REAL SHAKES RIGHT NOW?!  WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU FEEL THE NEED TO ADD THAT?!  THIS JUST DESTROYS ALL IMMERSION, I ALMOST FELT SOMETHING THERE FOR A SECOND! BUT THEN YOU HAD TO DO SOMETHING SO DUMB!  THIS ISN’T EVEN ON THE CHARACTER, THIS IS A STRAIGHT UP WRITING ISSUE!  EVEN I WOULDN’T DO SOMETHING THIS DUMB!  IT’S SO OUT OF PLACE!  IT GIVES ME MENTAL WHIPLASH CAUSE I HAVE TO DO A DOUBLE TAKE TO MAKE SURE I’M NOT JUST FUCKING SEEING SHIT! AND YOU KNOW WHAT’S THE WORST PART ABOUT THIS FUCKING PANEL?!

IT’S IN THE PRINTED BOOK! Taeshi saw this, drew it, posted it, and got whatever feedback from it.  Then later came back, saw it, and edited a bunch of things for the book, and decided, “No that’s fine.  We’ll leave it there, that’s perfectly okay.”  And just left it there!  WHY?!  You had a good scene, an actual honest to god, good scene.  And you had to just make a dumb joke, and ruin the whole mood.  This is the sort of bad run and gun cheap gag sort of shtick that you’d expect to see from Volume 1!  Except, even Volume 1 knew when to take itself seriously, and maintain that serious tone!  I mean imagine if this happened in something like Zach’s talk with Lucy.

Any good graces this scene had, in setting up these two working out their problems and moving in a nice direction is thrown out the window now, and for what?!  What’s the purpose?  Why would yo-

Oh…Oh no…

Please, have mercy! You already stabbed my back, please don’t stab me in the heart! Please, not like this!

Aaaugh, no!  Not like this!  Poor Rachel!  It’s not fair I can’-

Wait….

I-is…Is that it?

Are you kidding me?

That’s it?  Two pages?  Really? That’s how you’re breaking it off?  This is how you’re going to stab me? Look, there’s like 3 more inches left in the knife, come on.  Push it deeper.  Twist it, I know you want to.  WHY ARE YOU HOLDING BACK? FUCKING WORK THIS SCENE AND MAKE ME CRY!  

NO FUCK YOU, WE’RE NOT MOVING PAST THIS!

YOU WROTE RACHEL’S BREAK UP. IN

TWO

FUCKING

PAGES!?

YOU WROTE OUT ONE OF THE MOST GROUNDED, HEALTHY, PRODUCTIVE RELATIONSHIPS IN YOUR COMIC IN TWO PAGES LIKE IT WAS NOTHING!  WITH A HORRIBLE ONE-SIDED DIALOGUE, WHERE RACHEL IS TALKING TO PAULO WHO HAS SUDDENLY INHERITED THE EMPATHY AND UNDERSTANDING OF A BRICK WALL!  HOW COULD YOU DO THAT AFTER EVERYTHING YOU DID IN BUILDING THIS CHARACTER’S ENTIRE ARC AND DEVELOPMENT!?  AFTER TRANSFORMING A CHARACTER WHO WAS PORTRAYED AS UNLIKABLE, BITCHY, ANNOYING, SLUTTY, AND DUMB.

To fleshing her out, to be deep, thoughtful, caring, and supportive.  Rachel is my favorite character, and it’s not because she’s a slut it’s because she represented something in this comic that had been absent.  

Natural character development.  That wasn’t brought on by some big event shaking their entire core, and changing them. In fact, one of the best things about Rachel is that despite how differently her character’s reception is from Volume 6 compared to Volume 1, her personality, her attitude, and her core is mostly unchanged.  

She’s still slutty, she’s overweight, she’s silly.  But a big part of why I love her as a character, and why I think many others do as well, is because never does it seem to be a negative to her.  We don’t see her get upset, or self-conscious about her weight, or her sexual behavior, because she’s confident in herself and accepts herself. Not only that, but she’s shown to take charge, stand up and not be afraid to call out what she sees is wrong. And outside of her character…

She was a role model for Paulo.  Unlike Jasmine whose relationship was more Paulo bending himself to fit her lifestyle, Rachel was a character who accepted and supported Paulo’s lifestyle, but at the same time helped steer him to do the right thing.  And in a comic where almost every fucking character is so intent on dancing around their issues and waiting until it blows up in their face, Rachel served as an example of someone who had it together.  A proactive person, who didn’t want to see these characters get worse.

I have ranted and gone off on a lot of decisions and actions that these characters have done, but not once did I ever scratch my head or think twice about something that Rachel did. Her character didn’t need a bunch of insight, and excuses about hormones or “they’re teenagers, lol!” to understand her.  She simply was who she was, and I respect that.

In short…

Despite everything that my history with this comic gave me, the feelings I developed from all the bullshit that has happened in this story, despite all of that.  It was this one character, what she brought to the table, and what she did for the comic and its characters, that gave me something I thought I’d long lost, and never thought I’d ever regain.

She gave me hope in this comic.  That it would finally have its characters be proactive, regain its humor, and bring itself out of the slump it made for itself.  With this character, and the writing behind her, I believed Taeshi was finally on the right track, and was setting up something great that would grow the characters and build upon them naturally.

But that’s not what we got. And the real bitch of it is, this could’ve been a real emotional moment. A well executed front-stab.  We knew it was coming, we saw the writing on the wall, but we still needed to face the music.  It was set up to be a wonderful tragedy, where both parties are well aware of the futility of their relationship.  They understand each other, and why it won’t work, but also don’t want to let go.  And I was going to make a comparison to Two Kinds, because they had a similar scenario with Trace’s wife and the whole idea of moving on is a recurring theme… But looking back I realized something.  I don’t need to bring a comparison to Two Kinds or someone else’s comic, and no I’m not even going to draw a comparison of what I would’ve done in this situation by drawing a comparison to False Idol’s future scene (although I was thinking about that).  No, we don’t need to look too far because you know what the real sad part about this is?

We’ve had this conversation before.

And just look at it. Look how heartbreaking this is.  This is how it should’ve been.  You see that Paulo understands what she’s saying, he knows what she means and how bittersweet their relationship is.  It is one of the best moments from the newer volumes, and their inevitable breakup should’ve been a turning point.  It should’ve marked a big life-changing moment for Paulo.  Where he is sad about how he’s making Rachel feel, but he’s unsure about his own feelings. Maybe Rachel makes the decision for him and breaks it off, and Paulo realizes how hurtful his behavior is, and that he can’t play games with people anymore, that it’s not fair.  It could be the moment Paulo turns a new leaf and becomes more mature, and in seeing that; Rachel can let go taking some solace in knowing that he is a better person now.

But instead we got this…

We’re not even halfway through this god damn chapter. Well where is it taking us now?

Huh…and it seems that the writing is not going to change pace either, I wonder where this is going.

Oh boy, everyone’s getting into teams!  And oh man, Lucy’s going up against Mike!  And boy is this contrived.  And what’s even worse, is that despite how much Taeshi has shunned Volume 1 and its stupid sense of humor, and how shoddy it was.  Volume 1 wasn’t THIS contrived, and when it was, it was pretty tongue in cheek about it.  In fact!

This sounds like something Volume 1 would MAKE FUN OF.  But let’s give the benefit of the doubt maybe it’s not that bad.  It might have something going on, an-

(It’s interesting, I think I have like 3 reaction pics of Sam trying to shoot herself, but this one just can not be matched.  And it’s not even meant for the rants.)

You know what?  I’m not even gonna bother going over this part. No one will be seated during the harrowing “Will they won’t they” inconsequential dodgeball fight. Although I will say,

Not gonna lie, that actually got a laugh out of me.  Good job. Anyway, Lucy catches the ball and wins the game who cares.  But then…

First of all

Look at those arms. Damn Lucy what happened?  You’re looking like two toothpicks in a marshmallow.   But more than that.  Did I read that right?

Yeah!  It’s not like you stopped practicing Martial Arts!  Why would you?  It’s not like you had some serious physical trauma happen to stop you-

OH WAIT!

RECOVERY PERIOD? PHYSICAL THERAPY?  PFFFT WHO THE FUCK NEEDS THAT?  YEAH SURE, YOU’RE TOTALLY FINE AND CAPABLE BEING A FUCKING BLACK BELT IN TAE KWON DO.  SURE!  NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT! WHAT THE FUCK ARE STITCHES AM I RIGHT?

But I’m just combing cotton here, this all just fluff.  There’s really only one thing left to talk about here.

And I’ll be honest.

This.

Is…

Pretty good.

This is honestly really well done.  There’s nothing I can say about this.  It’s a very serious moment, I can feel Taeshi reaching for my heartstrings but I…I’m okay with it.  This was the moment I wanted to see.  Finally these characters air out some of their grievances.  We get insight to how they feel, we are finally getting somewhere. It’s not nice, but it’s progress an-

…

THAT’S THE TH-….

*sigh*

Fuck you too, Taeshi.

Three times.

Three fucking times in one chapter, that you set up something good.  Had a good thing going, and then decided to fuck it up at the end. That’s a new record.  Even when I expected nothing out of this chapter, you manage to let me down.  You astound me with how much you disappoint me.  If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were doing it to intentionally troll me. But I’m not that vain.  Fuck you Taeshi, I’ve said this before but always with the tone of hyperbole, and a bit of optimistic cynicism.  But this time I really mean it.  I have no more faith in you as a writer.  Whatever you come up with, however this ride ends.  I don’t think you will pull it off anymore.  I don’t think you have the competence to tie this up in a proper way.  At one point you could’ve.  At one point, I think you had it in you with the mindset, the creativity, and the emotional drive to tell a well-crafted story.  But not anymore, and I despise what you’ve become.    Let’s get this stupid chapter over with.

What’s next?  What are we doing huh?  What are we getting at?

Oh…

I see.  This is where we’re going huh? That’s what all this was for?

ALRIGHT! Y’KNOW WHAT? FINE! I GUESS THIS IS WHAT WE’RE DOING BOYS!  THIS IS THE NEW DIRECTION FOR BCB!  LOOK! SHE CALLED PAULO CUTE! OMG THE SHIP IS SAILING, DON’T YOU GET IT?  IT’S JUST SHIPPING! THAT’S ALL THAT MATTERS! THAT’S HOW WE’RE DRIVING THE PLOT!

FUCK ALL THAT CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT, THIS IS WHY RACHEL GOT DROPPED!  IT WASN’T CAUSE OF CHARACTERS NATURALLY CONCLUDING RELATIONSHIPS, IT’S ALL BECAUSE LUCY’S HERE AND WE CAN’T HAVE PAULO’S RELATIONSHIP WITH RACHEL CLASH WITH THAT!  SHE’S OUTLIVED HER USEFULNESS! NOW IT’S ALL ABOUT PAULO X LUCY, OR PAULO X DAISY WHICH IS IT?  THIS IS THE REAL DRAMA YOU ALL ARE LOOKING FOR!  THIS IS HOW WE REALLY MOVE THE PLOT AND CHARACTERS!  CHOO CHOO BOYS!  ALL ABOARD THE SHIP!  LET’S JUST GO ALONG FOR THE RIDE WHERE WE GOING TAESHI?  I’M READY!  I DON’T HAVE ANYTHING LEFT TO FUCKING LOOK FORWARD TO OR LIVE FOR!  SO COME ON, WHERE ARE YOU SAILING US?

I give it a 2/10.  Until next time, guys. 

[alitheamateur]

The Grind- Chapter 8

Warnings: Language. Fluff.

A/N: OHHHH, CHAPTER 8, HOW I LOVE YOU. This is one of my favorite chapters in the entire book, and I only hope you do enjoy it! It’s Colton and Liv, intimately behind closed doors, just how I like them. AND, DRUM ROLL.....You’ll even get a little insight into the mind of our boy Colton Ritter!!!

(GIFS FROM GOOGLE)

I hadn’t attempted to track Colton down once the weigh in concluded. He had hands to shake, and plenty of pictures to pose for. And as for me, there were a few colleagues I needed to speak with amongst the mass of people as well, before stealing away to him upstairs. Kate was on the list, a reporter for one of the local television news stations, who happened to live in the same apartment complex as I did. We weren’t tight pals by any means, but always spoke in passing every morning before work, and there was the occasional invitation to her flat for a drink to unwind. As a matter of fact, it seemed unwinding was precisely what Kate had in mind this particular evening, too. Her whining insistence on sharing a Cosmo in the lounge wouldn’t cease unless I caved. But, I was certain to make it a clear point that I only had time for ONE quick drink, and discreetly sent Colton a text to inform him I may be arriving a little behind schedule. 

As promised, Kate let me part after a single drink order and some simple small talk over some perfectly salted mixed nuts. We exchanged predictions on how we thought tomorrow night would go and where she had bought the camel colored satchel bag she was displaying in the seat next to her. Then, out of the sheer goodness of my heart, I even sat quietly listening to the horror story of her latest blind date mishap. Bless that poor girl, she really was a catch. Confident, very intelligent, lightyears ahead of other anchors in the city her age. To most men though, her every quality was one that intimidated their sensitive ego, making it a struggle to find a match who would encourage her success, rather than smother it.

I left her alone in the bar with her sorrows, honestly feeling a bit bad for abandoning her to drown them, then aimlessly wandered to find the elevator. Thankfully, I reach Colton’s floor without any company in the confines of the metal box. Creepy, awkward elevator conversation was #4 on the list of things I hated as much as cherry licorice.  I walked down the lengthy hallway lined with plum and green patterned carpet, then patted two light knocks on room 1893, and waited zealously. My toes patted in anticipation, and my lips buzzed a bit from the leftover coating of my stout Cosmopolitan.  The door opened surprisingly quick after my tapping by a handsome fellow adorning a pair of light grey boxer shorts.

“Damn, I was really hopin’ you were that pizza I ordered from downstairs.”

I kicked the door open further sending him back to hit the papered wall to the left, and he snuffled from a closed mouth grin.

“Sorry to disappoint,” I snarled. “And come on now, Ritter. You can’t be opening your door looking like that. You’ll have the maids brawling for who gets to bring up your extra towels.” I gestured a hand toward him, alluding to his quite painfully sexy, underwear model-esque appearance.

The tv was muted on ESPN, only a gold desk lamp casting light into the rather large room. A king size bed stationed closest to the wall with the double windows, covers unturned, and curtains drawn. Faint music danced over my ears, something from the classic rock genre. Journey, maybe? Our taste in music had thankfully been another similarity discovered sometime in the days of our courtship. I bent over removing one shoe at a time, to hurl them in the corner. I so loved my beautiful collection of pumps, but my feet could only take small doses. My ankles begged for my past preference of high-top tennis to return.

“So, I thought we’d just hang out in bed. Watch a movie or somethin’? I kinda just wanna relax. Unless you wanna go out? I can get dressed.” His words offered to go out, but his crooked eyebrow & pursed lips said otherwise.

“Staying in is perfect, babe. As long as you promise to share that pizza you’ve got comin’. Black olives?”

“Yep. Jalapeños only on my half.” It was miracle. I had found a man who compromised on the most important thing in my life. Food.

“You know the way to my heart, Colt.” I smoothed tiny circles with my flattened hand over the comforter of the bed, enticing him to join me. Rather than lightly crawling up next to me, he lunged wildly to flop weightlessly in the empty spot.

“I brought ya’ a t-shirt if you wanna change. It’s in my bag by the bathroom, I think. Figured you’d be wearin’ one of those sexy lil’ business suits you’re always prancin’ around in t’ torture me.” He reiterated his remark by grazing the small line of my exposed stomach. “I didn’t want cha’ to be uncomfortable all night.”

“All night? Is that an invitation? Whatever on earth would make you think I’d want to spend the night in this gorgeous hotel room with you, Colton?” I threw a hand to my chest and closed my eyes in a prudish manner.

“ ‘Cause you, Liv Caroline Elliot, just cannot resist me.”

Although he was right, I wasn’t about to give in defeatedly and just admit guilt. He always gave an effort to come off so self-confident, and poised even, like he himself was the holy grail to mankind. Somewhat similar to how Mendez carried himself. But, I was well aware it was all an exterior front for the twisted, emotional mess he was inside. He was like one of those candies with the crunchy, seemingly unbreakable shell that had smooth filling in the middle. By this point I had pretty well pulverized that outer layer, and it really wasn’t as difficult as imagined.

“You’re just so sure about that, aren’t ya’? But I think I could say the same when it comes to you, my overly confident friend.” One finger prodded his flexed peck.

“I think we both know I can’t resist ya’, two-one. And I ain’t a bit scared to say so.” I had sat up ready to climb from the bed and retrieve the t-shirt he mentioned, but was immediately yanked in a near whiplash motion down on top of him. He gave me a look that I wished I could bottle up and carry in my purse every day. It was a look of total admiration, torturous passion, and loving fulfilment. There were no smiles, or laughing from either of us. The room was simply clouded with a haze of love so thick it was nearly visible to the human eye. I grazed my nose to his, not daring to disrupt the conversation our eyes were exchanging, and kissed him with opened lids. It was returned, with his addition of a spirited squeeze to my tail. One thing I had noted about Colton, was he could draw me into the deepest depths of a moment, hold it for delayed second or two, then undoubtedly jerk away from the overwhelming rush of emotion like he had been stung by an angry bee. But I’d wait for him to open the heavy iron gate to that conversation regarding his slightly detached demeanor.

“I love you, Colt.”

“And I love you, gorgeous. Now, go’n get changed. Imma pick a movie for us.”

The path of my outfit left behind me was enough payback for the little winking stunt he pulled earlier at the weigh in.

By the time I appeared from the bathroom, the pizza had been delivered, the covers turned back, a 6-pack on the night stand, and an unbelievably attractive man awaiting me. My makeup washed off and hair knotted into a messy bun, I was pant-less wearing a baggy soft t-shirt that smelled of Colton’s bodywash, and ready to sink into bed with him. I didn’t want tomorrow to come because I was certain there was no way it could measure up to this.  

“Okay, so we got The Purge, or one of my personal favorites, the classic Harold & Kumar go to White Castle. You pick.”

“Shouldn’t we watch something like Fight Club, or, I don’t know… Rocky instead? That seems more your style.” I suggested raising one knee on the bed to boost myself up into the chill of the sheets. I loved the way his tanned, furry legs looked bold against the bleached white of the bedsheets.

“Although Rocky does top my movie list any day of the week, I can watch things that don’t involve fist to face violence, you punk. I ain’t a total adrenaline whore. I’ll have you know that I even saw The Notebook. Twice.” He informed me very matter of factly.

“I’m gonna go out on a limb here & say that date ended very well for you.” My mouth mimicked the act of vomit thinking about the lines he cooed into the ears of that poor girl causing her to all but leap into bed with him.

“Is somebody jealous? C’mon now, babe. Past is the past.”

There had only been one suitor he had been semi-serious with previously. Her name was Amber, they dated for 6 months, and he caught her in the locker room at Mac’s in a quite compromising position with his Physical Therapist. That was really all the details he shared, & it was definitely all I needed to hear. However, I knew his lack of romantic relationships was plenty compensated by his plethora of casual sex partners. The fact that he was experienced was extremely clear to me after that night in the ring at the gym. He worked fervently taking metal notes of what dips in my skin he could kiss that caused a gentle hum of pleasure, and which ones caused an almost violent writhing. 14 partners in his twenty-six years, a number I was far from comfortable with, but it wasn’t about to send me running scared either.

“Your past just seems to be a lot more.. eventful than mine.”  I admitted placing the sweating beer bottle between my greasy lips, and dropped my head in sheepish discomfort.

“First of all, you know damn well that don’t mean shit to me. You gotta think more of me than that, Livvy. ‘N second, that’s just all the more fun I get to have bein’ your little teacher, huh?” Both brows raised and fell in unison at his perverse inuendo.

“Get over yourself, PUH-LEASE.”

By this very crude point in the conversation, he’d eaten his entire hearty side of the pizza in addition to two slices of my black olive half, and I was 3 beers deep. The chatting began rolling so immensely, the tv remained off, and instead we’d left his iPod to shuffle at random through his vast array of musical tastes. We prodded question upon question about the other, shoveling for every fiber of detail we could harvest.  I was stunned in utter disbelief that he had never even been out of the country, and he seemed nearly repulsed in the discovery that I still wasn’t a Steelers fan despite living in The Burgh for coming up on three years. At some point I can’t recall, he stepped from the bed to open the drawn curtains, exposing the twinkling illuminations of the still very lively city even at the hour approaching 1 a.m.

He observed the world below him like he had created this kingdom himself. Colton was Pittsburgh through and through down to the marrow, and I wouldn’t change it for all the money in the world. The grouping of blue moonlight and changing street lights coated him in a glow almost angelic. He was laid smooth on his back, a bended arm beneath is pillow, and I laid in sideways position with my head situated across the rippling muscles of his inked abdomen, his fingers twirled lazily around an escaped hair from my updo. With passing minutes his words slowly developed a raspy, almost thorny tenor and his answering and asking of questions now more dawdled. He was like a tenacious child battling the certain feeling of sleep that enraptured him, afraid he may miss a revelation of crucial importance if he dozed off.

“Baby, I know I haven’t told you, but I want ya’ to know your article is really, really excellent. And I’m damn proud a’ ya’.“

I was confused at the compliment since he hadn’t read as much as one sentence from my piece yet. “Colt, it’s not even done yet. And how would you know since you’ve yet to see it, ya’ goof.”

“It’s your work, Liv. You’re a natural, kinda like me with fighting, ya’ know? It’s what we do best. And besides, you’re always sayin’ how proud you are of me, so I want ya’ to know someone feels that way about you, too. You got no idea how amazing you really are, do ya’ girl?”

His compliments nearly made tears spill from my welling eyes. This simple, yet so utterly perplexing man loved me to his core. I could feel it in his words right that second, and in the way his scarred knuckles brushed my cheek sending a shockwave of serenity to my soul. I had never fallen so deeply for someone in such a way, much less in just a few months’ time, and I was honestly terrified at every feeling I harbored for him. I shifted to rest my palms on his chest making eye contact with his flecked eyes.

“Why are you always so good to me, huh? Better be careful, babe.. People may think you’re going soft.” I warned, raising my brows to appear concerned.

“Oh, but you’ll be able to assure them that Colton Ritter is far, farrrrr from soft, baby…” One swift, lascivious movement now rendered me pinned at my sides by both wrists under two strong, veined hands. Although the act seemed to be hinting toward a much more lustful direction, he simply touched his lips to the corner of my slightly gaped mouth with a single extended kiss, lilting a melodious “I love you.”

                                                        Colton

She dozed off an hour or so before I had. The barely noticeable, gentle buzzing of her snoring mouth gave her away. The cotton-like thickness of my dry tongue screamed for a drink shortly after, so I had to scoot her head from crease of my arm, careful not to pull on the hair fluffed on top of her head. She had wallowed trying to get comfortable, I’m sure the damn hardness of my bicep wasn’t the best replacement for a pillow, and tangled strands of her blonde hair were brushing over her lashes. I often wished maybe I could give the gym a little break, and soften up a bit. Just so she’d be able to sleep tucked into my chest at night without feeling like she’d get a black eye if I moved the wrong way.

My high-school wresting t-shirt she slept in climbed up her belly, exposing more of the clean shade of white boy-shorts she wore underneath, and a teasing curve of the underside of her breast. I had seen my fair share of naked women in life, more beyond Liv’s level of comfort. But her? Damn it… She wasn’t Playboy, plastic lipped, and chiseled from head to toe like most empty fuckers like me would look for. Liv’s beauty was more palatable, and desirable to the real man. Beauty that maybe most people would miss out on. But me? She entranced me the minute she stabbed me with those emerald green eyes.

Her buttery soft skin, her blonde hair usually wild like the winds of Chicago. Not the kitchen sink blonde like you’d see down at the infested strip clubs downtown either. No, this was the sunshine yellow she was born with. Sandy, smooth blonde intertwined with some strands of caramel like the inside of a chewy candy bar..

Her perfect, pink, creamy buds painted rosy circles on the inside of the thin cotton of her shirt, and I thought very much that she might’ve been the sexiest thing I had ever seen. The screaming hard on pinned under my boxers said so. And despite the trickle of drool out the side of her slumbering mouth, and the smearing black of yesterday’s makeup stained under her eyes, I couldn’t look away. As if I’d even want to. And hell, if I wasn’t in love with this Indiana girl in every sense of the word.

                                                         Liv

Despite my desperate prayers for time to halt for just one night, it insisted on passing into the morning. I had slid from the bed just before dawn to close the dark curtains of the room, wanting to make sure he got undisturbed, restful sleep for what this day was going to require from him. And selfishly, it as also an attempt to keep our room as black as the unexplored ocean, foolishly thinking maybe the rising sun would just pass us by if I didn’t allow its light in. We had eventually forced ourselves to sleep the night before, after several attempts to kiss goodnight. One kiss, lead to three more, which lead to fifteen more, each holding more and more desire to carry those kisses elsewhere over the span of the other persons body. But, painfully so, I squandered it insisting he better get some shut eye.

Now, the digital clock on the nightstand closest to his side of the bed flashed 5:49 a.m., and I expected his internal clock to start stirring him very soon. From the sliver of dawn intruding through the minimal crack of the patterned drapes, I watched him sleep. Admired would be a better word. His lids smoothly sealed, no crinkles of struggle about them, and his mouth gently puckered. I made mental note of his naturally suntanned, unscathed face in the state it was now, knowing full well tonight would render it not so.  There were no bruises, no splits in his lips, no blackened eyes. He was the nearest thing to physical perfection I had ever laid eyes on. I hoped he couldn’t sense my focused staring.

Suddenly, I felt a growing itch in my nose, a building sneeze approaching. Trying at all costs to avoid waking his lifeless form, I pinched my nostrils shut in effort to trap the noise from escaping. However, the harsh flinch my body released sent a jolt over the entire mattress. Colt inhaled a loud, groggy breath and stretched his hand to grasp for my side of the bed.

“Hey, you,” he said rubbing the rest from his waking eyes.

The hearty drift of his accent from the hours of 4 to 9 a.m. could very near send me straight into orgasm.

“Sorry, babe. I tried not to wake you.”

He rolled over to face me dragging his arm around my waist to pull me into his chest, I smiled and draped a bare leg over his warm body.

“I ain’t got no problem at all gettin’ woken up by the likes a’ you, baby.” He crowded me with a drowsy kiss, his tongue curling slightly under my top lip. I could feel him rattle with laughter at the sensual pant he sucked out of me.

“You’re not so bad yourself, sir. How’d you sleep?”

“Like a baby with a full belly. You?”

I kicked back the covers, breaking the wall of warmth it had closed around us and scooted to raise on the edge of the bed.

“Great. I’m thinking of getting one of these mattresses for my place. It may take up every inch of my entire bedroom, but it’d be well worth it.”

“Hey hey hey, where you think you’re going, little lady?!” Colton was propped on both arms, scowling at me under a lined forehead. “You ain’t even gonna have breakfast with a man? I feel so cheap.”

Always so witty, this one. “I just assumed you had a lot on your agenda today, Colt. I don’t want to hover.”

I was puzzled constantly over when to stick around, and when to leave him be. Appear as committed, but not obsessed. Interested but not overbearing. I had never been with an older man before, were the rules different?  Sure, he was only 26 to my almost 23, but nonetheless older. Did the “hard to get rule” expire with men in their late-twenties?

“Livvy, stop worryin’, baby. Mornings before a fight are actually pretty laid back. I’ll spend most of the day with my headphones in my ears, prolly take a dip in the jacuzzi,” he was rolling his eyes, motioning his hands back and forth to explain the boring schedule of his day. “Then, meet the guys in Mac’s room to talk things out before we head to the venue. So, at least lemme order us some room service so I can enjoy breakfast with my girl, ight? Unless you got somethin’ else I could eat for breakfast? It’s the most important meal of the day, y’know…”

Damn this pig. This sexy, magnificently tantalizing pig.

I hurled the hotel menu on the desk speedily toward him, “Cold shower, Ritter. Cold shower.”

If he wanted breakfast in bed with me, who I was I to deny? Rolling my puffy morning eyes at him, I crept back into bed.

“Waffles, please! And bacon. Oh! Fruit on the side, too. And coffee. Don’t forget coffee.”

Like he said, breakfast is the most important meal of the day, right?

The man was impressed with my appetite for food, among other things as well. “Yes, ma’am!” he obliged. “Anythin’ else for the princess?”

“Maybe some whipped cream? For the waffles, of course….”

I was even surprised at myself for the boldness he brought out in me. Sex was a very.. taboo thing back home. Matter of fact, I never even got “the talk” from my parents, and instead was left to the uneducated murmurs of my fellow sheltered classmates. But with Colton, I felt audacious when it came to the topic. Mind you, the things he said most of the time could sent me blushing under the table, but I was growing more comfortable with his dirty remarks and was even starting to throw in my own ornery overtone on occasion.

“Oh shit. You a damn tease, Liv Elliott. A dirty, dirty tease.”

Our indulgent spread of breakfast variety was carted to the door in a very prompt fashion. I obviously indulged more than he, devouring two Belgian waffles, 3 strips of the crispiest peppered bacon I’d ever had the pleasure of eating, a grapefruit, and two cups of coffee. He enlightened me that he could’ve eaten every morsel in front of him, but it wouldn’t be a good idea to cram all the carbs and fat into his stomach, in case it made him feel sluggish. So, regretfully it was egg whites, two slices of dry wheat toast, and a protein shake for him. I did entice him to take just one bite of my syrup sopped waffle though.

“Sheesh, I’m gonna need a solid nap later to recover from that overload.” I crashed backwards onto the feather pillow behind me, crossing my hands over the settling food baby in my stomach.

“Hey, do me a favor will ya’? Wear that sexy fuckin’ leather jacket o’ yours I like so much tonight? I know I won’t see ya’ before the fight, but I want you to wear it out to celebrate after. My little badass, front-page writer out on the town.” He was kissing my individual fingertips one at a time.

“Sounds like you’ve got it all planned out then.” My gut bubbled with hope that tonight would bring to pass every detail he had said. Him, the newly crowned Middleweight Champ on my arm, and me, the newest front-page writer for the Pitt Pilot. Could life be that perfect for us?

“Course. A man with a plan.”  I admired how he trampled every aspect of life with blinding confidence, and I wished he could somehow hypnotize me to do the same. “As much as I hate to leave good company, babe, I should get home. Let you get all angry and pouty and what not.” I sighed into a near pout, sincerely wishing I could spend the entire day as a part of his prep team.

“You’re probably right, baby doll. I can’t believe Mac ain’t been here beatin’ my door down yet.”

I was gathering my day-old clothes to redress, and Colt rose to begin lightly packing his gym bag. He threw in an unfolded change of shorts, his red headphones, then I saw him pick up the gloves I’d gifted him.

“C’mere, two-one..” I zipped my khakis up and lifted my hair out from under the neck of my shirt, then obliged to his request. He held one glove in each hand and squared them even to my chin. 

“Kiss ‘em for luck?”

My heart hiccupped, and I topped his hands with mine and dipped my puckered lips to the padded mitts with an audible “mwah.”

“That’s it. The magic touch! The final nail in that jackoff Mendez’s coffin. A kiss of luck from my girl. Now, got one more kiss on that pretty little mouth for these?” he begged, one finger pointing to his own sinful lips.

I closed in on him with fierce eye contact. “I think I may have just one little measly kiss left in here somewhere for you, champ.”

My mouth was so close to his that the words nearly vibrated off of his parting lips, and I gently cupped his dimpled cheek. It was a lethal concoction made of salaciousness and loving romance that was slowly poisoning my entire body with bliss. Colton’s hand swept down the side of my head, combing through the tangled hair he had gathered it into his fist at the back of my neck. I was locked to him and I never knew being captured could feel so, so good. My tongue covered almost every surface in his mouth, mapping it out. He withdrew and I could feel his lips spreading upward into a smile.

“Wow. I think I may need to drown myself in an ice bath now. A cold shower ain’t gonna wipe that one outta my mind.”

I was pleased that I had to same affect on him, and his did on me.

“Good luck tonight. You don’t need it. You’ve got this. Step into that cage ready to battle. Clear eyes, okay? I love you, Colt.”

“Clear eyes. I got it, baby. And I love you too, Elliott. More than you fuckin’ know.”

TAGS: @torialeysha @eap1935

[thegeminisage]

merlin thots about the s5 opening episodes.......

here’s your courtesy cut

one of my favorite things about s5 so far is how very nicely arthur and merlin have both 1. grown up and 2. grown into each other...they still give each other shit 24/7 but it’s a lot more companionable and comfortable now than it ever has been. furthermore, both of them exhibit the use of MULTIPLE braincells even at the SAME TIME. they work very well together as a team even in the heat of battle (we did see shades of this near the end of s4), despite merlin being kind of useless at physical combat when he couldn’t rely on his magic for a boost. they can have entire conversations without a word and they’re just INCREDIBLY synchronized. the whole #vibe has really gotten a level up

timeline-wise, it’s been roughly a decade since season 1. in s1 they said the purge began 20 years ago (upon arthur’s birth), and shortly after, he had a coming of age ceremony - 21′s an important number, so in season 1 arthur began as being 20 and turned 21 before the end. season 2 = 22. gap year for s2-s3 = 23. season 3 = 24. s3-s4 gap year = 25. season 4 = 26. 3 gap years betweeen s4-s5 = 27, 28, 29. season 5 = 30. i don’t know how long it was in real life between seasons 4 and 5 (definitely not three years), but i really do feel like they’ve both aged SO much and they absolutely act like people who have known each other for a decade.

gwen as queen is AMAZINGNGLSDKJGHDSLFG she’s SO PRETTY i love her SO MUCH. love that she has her own serving girl now! this is what she deserves

the round table is good too altho it looks a bit too big for that room. it’s amazing though like...FUCK uther pendragon arthur has come SO FAR

merlin being nice to the new girl is very charming. makes him seem older and w-w-WISER (love that word) by comparison

also love that merlin gets to ride a horse while some of the footsoldiers walk. that’s #status. that’s *** ******

pretty sure i had a stroke during merlin’s vision of arthur’s death. the whole thing was done SO well - they go from the battlefield and arthur’s incredibly dirty face as he very realistically looks like he’s falling down and dying and then cut to a very alive and present arthur asking what’s wrong. you can really FEEL the whiplash, and also the dread settles in nice and deep, at least it does if you’re me and you’ve read spoilers, like, “only you can keep arthur safe” BUT I KNOW HE DOESN’T I KNOW HE CAN’T I KNOW HE FAILS and merlin might as well know it too because he looks ready to CRY and thru the rest of this 2-parter opening he acts like he thinks arthur may drop dead at any moment

i feel like i read somewhere once that actors don’t like to eat during a scene unless absolutely necessary because when you do 30 takes of something you get very full very quickly and some even go so far as to have a spit bucket just out of sight so that they can just get rid of it without having to eat any more. which makes it absolutely bananas to me that so often in merlin the characters are not only eating but eating very quickly as though they really have been roughing it in the wilderness all day & are absolutely famished...they don’t have to show them eating so often BUT THEY DO

arthur getting merlin into a tight spot by insisting he perform, planning on laughing at his failure? funny. merlin ACTUALLY USING MAGIC TO TEACH HIMSELF TO JUGGLE so that he could watch arthur’s jaw hit the floor? PRICELESS. i wonder how long it took him to do that, he definitely wasn’t using a body double

merlin is acting so bleak and dire in these episodes that even mr no-empathy himself asks him whats wrong, multiple times. they’re doing a VERY good job at really driving home the fact that arthur’s time is running short and there’s nothing anyone can do about it. merlin’s so sick with dread he’s making ME sick with dread. arthur’s here and being his normal dumbass self but the distance between them feels HUGE during the moments merlin is thinking about arthur’s impending doom

arthur all “i cant believe u can juggle i didnt even know you could catch” and then throwing the boots at merlin only for merlin to NOT CATCH THEM and arthur goes “see explain that” and merlin goes “wish i could” and i D I E 

because he’s KNOWN HIM FOR A DECADE and he still can’t explain the magic and at this point it must feel like to him that he never, ever will UUUUUGH it’s funny how they can feel so close to each other one second and like THIS the next i am DYING

the little conversation they have when they make camp the next night is the same. the sad music plays, merlin keeps looking at arthur like it might be the last time he sees him, and arthur keeps insisting on asking merlin what’s wrong and trying to make him feel better...they’re really for real friends!!! they’re so serious and grown up!!!!!

ive lost count of how many times either merlin or arthur has been nearly dead and had to get hauled around by the other one

also of how many times merlin used his magic in a way that should have been obvious to bystanders and wasn’t

“if morgana doesnt kill you i will" “threatening a king is treason merlin” “what about threatening an ASS” listen. look me in the eyes. this is TOP TIER banter

remember how in the early seasons they’d bend over backwards to leave plausible deniability when expressing affection? like “we’d be good friends if you weren’t a prince” or “you’re not wise or anything but yeah you’re wise” or whatever dumb toxic masculinity bullshit...those days are OVER with. merlin speaks DIRECTLY from the heart. “i’m worried about you” and “i swear i’ll protect you or die at your side” he is not fucking around even a little bit. this fool is in love

they were ALMOST cuddling when they slept together under that overhang

the two of them trapped in that net was PRICELESS. in the early seasons i got a little tired of the frequent slapstick/juvenile humor and wished the series was a bit more serious but now that they’re here i cling to every shred of levity with my whole heart

i was SO relieved to realize gwen wasn’t actually planning on killing that poor girl - i kept saying the entire time it was very out of character for her, no way could she be that cruel

arthur: “you wanna kill me fine but my last request is for you not to kill merlin” merlin: “you wanna kill arthur fine but you’re gonna have to go through me” arthur: “for fucks sake”

merlin: i never do as i’m told! that’s *** ******

i dont care if mordred DID save their lives i NEVER wanted to see him less i am so full of dread

i can’t BELIEVE morgana also has a pet dragon. she and merlin could have been the BEST foils and i’m STAYING mad about it. she was actually so good in this episode - way less full of evil smirks - that i briefly rejoined the morgana defense squad and got REAL pissed when mordred eventually shanked her, ESPECIALLY after she was so happy she was nearly crying to see him again. WHAT IS IT WITH THAT KID AND STABBING PEOPLE KNOCK IT OFF

the snowy environments in this episode were soooo good. the scenery was just...top fucking tier and it’s nice to see them somewhere other than the same old places. also like NO allo but arthur looks really nice just wandering around through a bunch of fucking snowbanks with dirt all over his face

arthur and merlin’s little ploy to steal that dagger by arthur faking a collapse was SO GOOD. they’re SO IN SYNC. i was THRILLED. better still: he winked when he was done. he used like FIVE WHOLE BRAIN CELLS AT ONCE and he was ALMOST as proud of himself as i am proud of him. what a guy, that arthur pendragon

their escape was really good too. the nonverbal communication? top tier! they just give each other little looks and then proceed to wreck the whole scene. doubly funny when the slaver is like WHO SPILLED THAT STUFF and arthur just kind of jerks his head over at merlin. snitches get stitches, YOUR HIGHNESS

i barely felt one whole emotion for sefa or her dad but him dying was like. sad. this show is sad. why the fuck am i watching it. i hate character death. they were hugging

arthur seemed like he was having just the time of his LIFE sneaking into that big ol tower of doom. dude was all cute little quips and smiles. popped his head outta that lil minecart like a kid at christmas

i love also that you give percival nothing but a single sword and in short order he goes about liberating all the slaves, killing all the slavers, and then reappropriating their swords to a better cause. he’s a one-man army. i was SO impressed. and he really looked like he was having fun too

merlin seeing that lil baby dragon again was SO fucked up and sad. why can’t it TALK :(((

also lmao “merlin you cant be that stupid” “no i am if you dont believe me watch” and merlin bolts and arthur sighs with SO much longsuffering and says “im going after him”

the light in morgana’s eyes when she talks about wanting to have arthur’s head and then her stabbing him over and over without actually killing him...she’s batshit insane. rip

i do like that arthur sort of TRIED to talk her around...it’s the first time he’s really gotten to speak with her since the end of season 3 when he found out who she was

on a final note, though, i am less than thrilled with the knighting of mordred...how is it arthur can KNOW who he is, that he’s a druid, and can do magic, and LET HIM INTO THE KNIGHTS, and still have sorcery be outlawed in camelot?? it doesnt make any SENSE

[beer-me-strcngth]

Something Wicked This Way Comes

When: June 22 Where: By the river Who: Bree & Eerb  (Please forgive the lack of editing on this, I’ll update it at a later date I just wanted to get it posted for now)

The river is placid today, its surface calmer than usual and sparkling under the midday sun. Birds chirp in the trees on the island’s shoreline. Summer heat settles over everything, blanketing it in humidity that manages to be almost pleasant, if still a little stifling. The current begins to pick up, gradually at first, but then the river starts to rush. Waves form on its surface. A figure comes skating through them, light bouncing off of her sun-bleached hair. Her feet are bare, floating upon water which bends perfectly to her whims. Her grin is wild and her laughter unbridled; seaweed strands are tangled up in her hair, and a fine film of salt coats her suntanned skin wherever it hasn’t recently been splashed. Despite all the little details, Bree may as well be looking into the flat waters of a clear lake, or a perfectly clean mirror - this person is a perfect reflection of her. When she opens her mouth to speak, even her accent is the same. “You look like you could be having a lot more fun right now.”

Bree blinks at the alternate version of herself -- part of her had been preparing for this since the others had their encounters, but it was still weird. Really weird. "Riiiight. Sure, okay. If this is a parent trap type situation and you're here to tell me that your mom has a picture with half of my dad's face and we're twins separated at birth, I'm gonna need a drink."

"I wish. How funny would that be?" She laughs. Liberty in a single sound. The water around her shifts like it finds Bree amusing, too. "We're not really twins. I mean, I guess we are? In a sense? But not literally in a shared-a-womb way. Besides, I'm too busy doing whatever I want to worry too much about schemes and hijinks. There are always waves to catch and magic to use, you know."

"Sure, I guess. But have you tried schemes and hijinks? They're pretty awesome," Bree said, moving closer to the water. "Like, recently I put out a bunch of catnip for a friend who... you know what, long story. Complicated story. But I digress. You know rivers aren't really great for surfing, right? White water rafting, maybe."

"I remember the catnip! That was fantastic. Aeron never quite puts that in the past, watch out." Her hands are on her hips and she wiggles her toes in the water, perfectly at ease suspended just above it. "I'd be on the open ocean now, but you happen to be on a river. You make do with what you've got. Actually, I'd rather be in the Bermuda Triangle." Her eyes are alight with mischief. "Once, just for fun, I pulled the whole area into a giant whirlpool and sped around so fast I gave myself whiplash. Worth. It."

She frowned at that, trying to figure out what exactly all the implications of those statements were. But that wasn't really her strong suit. "What if I get Aeron like..... a cool sword or something? Will he forgive me? I honestly didn't mean it for him. But also, what the fuck, dude? Are you gonna explain who you are or what you're doing here? Or are we going to just hang out, I'm leaning toward the second one if you want my opinion, always figured I'd be fun to hangout with."

"You could give him magic the likes of which he's never seen. Worked wonders on me." Her smile is completely unbothered even as Bree tries to usher them to the point. "Right right, I came here for a reason. We could totally hang out. Come with me to Bermuda! And, you know, stay." She tilts her head, watching Bree intently. "Sticking around here... It's fine. It's whatever. A little bit stifling though. I was okay with that at first, until I found out that magic doesn't work like we think it does. Bree, there's so much more we can do. I love everyone on the Council, for sure, even the grumps, but the thing itself is kinda... Unnecessary. I've found something better. So I came to tell you about it."

"I never doubted there was more," she said honestly. "The trouble with being reincarnated and relying on my shitty note-taking skills to learn from. But if I'm going anywhere, it's home. Australia home. I mean, Bermuda is officially on the bucket list now because that sounds awesome, but these people would literally die without me. Of boredom, probably. Gimme your spiel. And your cell number. And your go-to karaoke song."

For perhaps a split second, something serious, maybe even solemn, crosses her face. "They really do struggle not to let their seriousness swallow them whole." Water laps at the river shore, inching closer to Bree. "You can go anywhere, Bree. Surf Bermuda, check out some arctic glaciers, be back at Bondi in a second. I'm telling you, the magic we've had hidden away from us all this time? Total game-changer." With a puff of air she blows a lock of hair out of her eyes. "You've kinda gotta throw yourself at it, though. It's a whole-ass-or-nothing deal, and it'll tear the Council right apart if you aren't careful. Guess that's what happens when nobody is in charge."

"Yeah, I'm not actually worried about getting more magic for myself, I'm pretty happy with what I have. It's way more than most people have. But if you know where Feiyan is, that I'm interested in."

She groans almost playfully. "You're asking me the one thing I'm incapable of answering. Or, actually, one of like five. I can try, but I think the effect is supposed to make me look like a fish out of water. All lip, no noise. Feiyan can be found, though, that's the good news. I used all this magic to do that." She hardly lifts a finger and two columns of water rise to flank her. Then they begin to twirl, graceful as dancers, before sliding back into the river. "It's not just raw power - although it's that, too. Have you ever dreamed of commanding the entire ocean, Bree?" The reflection smiles like she's looking right through Bree. Her eyes are a little wild, focused on the horizon. "We are the ocean. Have you ever thought about that? What's a better embodiment of Strength than that?" Her words fall to silence and it lasts for several long beats, until she shakes her head and brings herself back. "But it's not just that. It's being about to teleport just like Mitch, or walk through the world with all your Spidey senses dialed up as high as they go like Justice. It's what The Ancients meant to take away, I suppose, and it's the key to finding Feiyan. Or to destroying the Council as you know it."

"What are the other four things?" Bree asked curiously. She sat on the river bank and leaned back on her elbows, face toward the sun to soak up as much vitamin D as she could. "The ones you can't answer. I know you can't tell me the answers but what are the questions?" Part of her doubted her double would answer that, either. Maybe it was question two. She turned her head toward the bizarro-Bree and shaded her face with one hand. "So, you're me. You made your choice, got the power, whatever. You're here to tempt me to do the same. Why? What do you care, you got your eeveelution, why does it matter if I make a different choice?"

She hummed, looking down at Bree from where the water held her high. "Five wasn't literal, buuuuut, I can't just give you the secret to using other magic - I can only tell you it's drawn from ley lines. I can't tell you who's about to come meddle in the Council's whole shtick, but I can tell you someone is. Stuff like that. I'm allowed to warn you, but I can't give you the answers you need." No emotion shifts over her face to cover her serene contentedness. Even if what she says seems urgent, she herself is as carefree as the ocean. "You're me, right? I'm you. And I kinda care about myself and what I need. Not enough to try to make you do anything, because when has that ever worked on us, but enough to warn you. There's a lot more to being Strength than you know, and was exhilarating to figure out for me. Helped me find Fei. Helped me figure out where I belong. Spread the happiness, babe."

"Yeah, we went to the ley lines. Someone is fucking with them. You know anything about that?" Bree asked. She sighed, this alternate version of her was too.... stoic. The fact that her face didn't give away her every thought spoke volumes to how different the two girls really were. Everything she was offering felt too good to be true -- the proverbial snake in the garden offering endless knowledge in exchange for eternal damnation. "Here's the thing Eerb... You're me, I'm you, so I feel like we know each other pretty well. And... I just don't trust you. There's an ulterior motive here, I don't know what it is, but I know it's there. I know that because I'm a terrible fucking person and given the chance at adventure and excitement I throw caution to the wind every time and fuck things up -- I've read about it over and over and over and I'm trying to break the cycle here."

Her calm surface gives no hint of any currents which may run beneath. "I do. I can tell you it's, uh, interference from others who..." She's thinking of words which won't get her in trouble, that much is clear. "Who know about magic and how to use it. Who aren't on the Council. Is that a good enough hint? I'm not discussing unicorns here or anything. That would be fun, though." She chuckles at 'Eerb' and doesn't bat an eyelash at Bree's candor. Doesn't seem moved by anything at all, really. Maybe her expression gains a hint of seriousness, but even that isn't easily proved. "You don't have to trust me. That seems fair enough. I did just show up out of the blue while you were minding your business. And I'm not asking you to decide anything now! I have to come back later to show you the full extent of this power anyway. So I'll come back, and you can decide then to trust me or tell me to get lost, if you like. Right now is just for giving you everything I can. Right now is for telling you that you an be the ocean, Bree. You can be a lot more than just some person or some Councilor. The Council is going to fall apart over this magic one way or another. You might as well become the force of nature you are, find Feiyan, and get a taste of that adventure before someone steals it from you for good."

saltlord06/22/2019

glittersatan06/22/2019

(,kjhgfghj) (that was so funny i broke character)

saltlord06/22/2019

(you're welcome)

"Come back for Halloween, we can get one of those two person horse costumes but a unicorn. We'll be super fucking magical," she said with a grin. "I'll keep an eye out for Death Eaters screwing with the leylines, if I can... And, for the record, I'm not saying get lost, do what you want as long as it's not hurting anyone, I just don't know what I'm going to do. In my experience when someone offers you something that sounds too good to be true, it usually is. The only exception has been Feiyan. What you're offering sounds a bit like Ultimate Cosmic Power, ITTY-BITTY living space, ya know? So I'll think about it. You can stick around, if you want. We can go do karaoke or like... freak people out with twin-y things."

"Are you afraid of me being some kind of magical used car salesman? I guess that makes sense. I can't promise people won't get hurt." She cants her head, expression pensive. "But that's true no matter what you do. See, once Marcy or Dan or Azra gets their hands on this power... yikes. Let's just say things went to hell right quick and my first instinct was to run away to Australia. Getting between them and their precious power wasn't easy. Hard decisions come with the territory." The little river waves around her grow agitated, sliding back and forth to the rhythm of the reflection's toes tapping the water's surface. "It took me a while to get used to all this... raw power. But magic is a force of nature, and nature's gonna be around long after us." She shrugs and then her grin starts up again. She starts to hum, a little off-key and without much attention to being nice to listen to, before a song tumbles from her laughing lips. "If you change your mind, I'm the first in line! Honey, I'm still free, take a chance on me." She steps onto the shore to accompany her singing with a dance, the water responding in kind. "I dunno the words, duh-nuh nuh nuh nah, something somethi-i-ing, take a chance on me-" She dissolves into her laughter for a moment and then straightens her spine again. "Karaoke rules and we are obviously fantastic at it. I can't stick around too long, though. Bermuda's my hot date."

“See, now I know you’re evil. How can you not know the words to ABBA? I’m going to kick your ass at karaoke.”

glittersatan06/22/2019

(is that her response for real kjhgf)

saltlord06/22/2019

Yeah. That’s it. She intends to think about the rest of it and try to sort it out in her head but talking to her double doesn’t seem to be getting her anywhere? Probably because she’s not asking good questions because she’s... a dummy lol

glittersatan06/22/2019

(i love everything about her)

saltlord06/22/2019

(I’m glad someone does lol)

glittersatan06/22/2019

"I mean, do you want me to be evil?" she asks, not remotely put out by the thought or Bree's lack of faith. "I can try. Not sure I'll be all that good at it since, like, all I can think about is ABBa and curly fries now, but you know how it is."

“No, that seems counterproductive. But I remember learning about doppelgängers and they’re like... always evil so.” She shrugged. “Damn, now I want curly fries. I think there a food truck nearby. Wanna see?”

"Oh, that's totally another thing I can't explain. What exactly I am. Or from when or- well, I can hint, but specifics don't come through. Let's get curly fries. I think the last time I had any was before Nadine went totally nuts and black magicked the whole Lair to pieces." She says it like she's commenting on the weather and then rubs her hands together excitedly. "You know what I love about food trucks? No dress code. I'm totally barefoot and they can just suck it."

“If anyone was gonna do it, it’d be her,” Bree sighed. “But also, I don’t like that you’re just so blasé about Nadine going bat shit and blowing things up. That’s... not ideal.” She looks down at her alternate self’s feet and cocks her head to the side. “If you’ve got access to everyone’s powers, couldn’t you just bamf some shoes here?”

"I got her to stop, so I mean..." She shrugs. "She can't hurt anyone now, and that's what matters, isn't it?" She does a mock tap dance in the sand just for Bree. "I could. I could do anything I wanted, though. Turn my feet into pterodactyl claws if I feel like it. Barefoot is nice, I like sand between my toes."

"Okay, but, ya know... it's June. And this isn't like a beach beach. Gonna be walking on asphalt soon enough. But hey, you do you."

She beams at the suggestion and pulls her knee up to take a step forward. Water rushes from the river to form a bubble floating just barely above the ground, and it supports her weight when she steps onto it. "Shoes are boring unless they're shaped like animals. And I could just bamf up some narwhal-shaped slippers, but this feels more fun."

"It's also super conspicuous? There are muggles around."

At that she groans. "Does that really matter? What are they gonna do, arrest us? Just tell them I'm a street magician and everyone else will come up with some rational explanation for what they're seeing."

"Yeah, and then you disappear and everyone looks at me with questions and I get blamed. Don't tell me you're too spoiled to walk."

"You're the one who just warned me about asphalt!"

"So put on some shoes! Damn, girl. There does not need to be this much drama. And that's coming from me."

She rolls her eyes but there's humor in the curve of her lips. It's the way someone who knows they're being purposefully unhelpful smiles. One moment her feet are bare, the next they're supported by beachy sandals. "Better, Miss Snippy?"

"Yes. And those are cute, you can leave them when you go." With that, she flips her hair and starts walking toward the food truck.

"Bossy bossy," she says as she strolls along after Bree. "And you think you wouldn't be a good leader."

"I wouldn't. There's a big difference between being bossy and making good decisions."

"Well, duh, but you aren't bossy to Azra or Eve or Aeron or anyone when you need them to listen to you." She arches her eyebrows like she's daring Bree to tell her otherwise. "You're a great listener when you try, and you know how to command attention without ever actually commanding. Sounds like leadership to me, but what do I know, I'm only you."

"You know as well as I do that people like Salma and Marcy will never take me seriously, nor should they. And I don't want to be in charge."

"They let their massive egos get in the way. How do they walk around like that all the time? Gotta be hard on their necks, am I right or am I right?" She stops in her tracks, her head cocked to the side. "Well if you won't be in charge, how can you trust anything will get done?"

"I'm not one of those if you want something done right you have to do it yourself types. I trust the people I'm with - yeah, they'll fuck some things up but we're all fuck ups so, what can you do? Micromanaging is exhausting and time consuming and ultimately counterproductive. So says the one book on management I read when I was seventeen. But it was written by flipping Navy Seals, so..."

"Did the Navy train them to flip, do you think?" She hasn't budged. "It's not really micromanaging if you tell them what to do and they do it. It's kind of just, managing. We are all fuck ups, though, that's totally true."

"Who knows," she replied with a shrug, moving around her double to continue toward the food truck -- the more important goal at the moment. "I'm not a manager."

She watches Bree's back as she walks away, her smile vanishing for a moment as her eyes narrow dangerously. Pleasantly she asks, "Then what are you?" and re-schools her face into something cheerful and benign, if a little tight around the eyes.

"A happy -- and hungry -- peon."

"I didn't realize you'd back down so easy from a challenge." It's an obvious attempt to goad her, but then, her carefree smile is starting to strain.

Bree smirked and shrugged. She didn't really think of herself as a happy peon -- it was true that she didn't want to be in charge, but there was also a part of her that wanted to see what would happen with this double if she just continued to do the opposite of what Eerb seemed to want. "Yup. We're pushovers, you ought to know that."

Now she makes no effort to hide her slitted gaze. "What about helping people? Protecting magic? Rescuing Feiyan? You'd rather just stand by and see what happens?"

Bree can't help but roll her eyes and sigh. "Calm down, okay? I'm partially messing with you because I know you're sure as fuck messing with me. But all that other stuff is going to work out -- we're going to find Fei. Magic is always chaotic and it will continue to be chaotic but we'll figure it out and we'll manage as a team -- it's what we do. I'm going to keep helping the council as much as I can, as annoyingly as I can, because they're my family and that's what you do with family. You, on the other hand, are probably an evil double sent from The Darkest Timeline™ to steal my soul, half my socks, and probably my favorite t-shirt, then stir shit up and either leave or replace me like a changeling. I'm not really cool with that but I also don't know how to stop it and I'm morbidly curious so I figure my best bet is to be myself -- an annoying troll -- and hope you get bored and either kill me or that we get a bicycle built for two."

There is a long silence. Nothing seems to move around them, and neither does the reflection. She just watches Bree. There is curiosity leeching into her face now, but it's tempered by wariness, or perhaps disappointment. Then she moves just a little too fast for comfort, coming to a stop right in front of Bree. Their eyes would be perfectly level if her head was not tilted slightly. Her gaze searches Bree's face. "I don't know what to make of you," she says softly, dissatisfaction evident.

She flinched slightly as her double moved in front of her, because that's weird af. "Yeah, I get that a lot." Her voice is nonchalant, but she's tensed to run if needed. (NOT THAT IT'D DO ANY GOOD BECAUSE HOLY SHIT HER DOUBLE JUST BASICALLY NARUTO RAN IN FRONT OF HER)

Her nose twitches. "You're so... tame." She's not bothered by their closeness, leaning her neck back only to get another look at Bree, then closing that distance yet again. "All the jokes and the pretenses. You're like a puppy. You aren't interested in power or doing important things or anything, are you? You just want to play."

"You're supposed to be me, you should know." She takes a step back and to the side, moving toward the food truck again. (She's such a little shit, I'm sorry. Because she knows her evil twin wants her do do something she's going to do NOTHING out of spite. #TheWorst )

"Maybe I should take your place."

"You'd be bored."

"I had such fun before, though... And I'm out of my own friends to drown."

Bree arches an eyebrow, turning and walking backward so she can look at her double while still making her way toward the food truck. "This is the part where I'm supposed to say something like 'touch them and I'll kill you' but if you really were me, you'd know that so I don't have to say it. Thing is, I can tell you're trying to get a rise out of me, I'm just not sure why. You want my life? Seems like you're more powerful than I am, you could murder me right here and now and take it. But you're not doing that, so there's either a bigger goal or something stopping you. I'm not the brightest bulb, but I'm also pretty sure that you're not actually me. I watched Back to the Future, interacting with your past/future self like...erases photos and fucks with the time space continuum. So, if you want something, do us both a favor and come out with it."

Disinterest filters into her expression and she shrugs. "I came here to offer what I have. You don't have to take it, but then I don't have a reason to stick around. Your life isn't important in the grand scheme of things." She turns away, looking back toward the water. "You just get reborn."

"If I'm so unimportant, why bother making the offer at all?"

"I never said you weren't important."

"So I'm important, just not my life? Meaning, what? Strength matters but not the current incarnation?"

She settles a sidelong glance over her shoulder at Bree, her face hard and inscrutable. "You could be the ocean, you know. Unfathomable. Powerful beyond belief, and vital. I don't know why you wouldn't choose that. But you don't have to - it's not something I can force. What comes next will be painful for you if you choose to watch from the sidelines, that's the best I can explain. Too afraid to take a risk and rise to the challenge? Then be afraid."

"Dually noted." She rolls her eyes and starts turns to walk away before turning back and adding, "Oh, and fuck you, too."

She smiles at that, an expression too wide and sharp for Bree's features, but she says nothing at all in return. (bree can exit orrrr engage, anything you want)

saltlordToday at 2:49 AM

Yeah, she's done with this bish

Bored of your threats now, i'm gonna get a snow cone

glittersatanToday at 2:50 AM

in that case picture eerb walking off into the water and sliding right into it to disappear - fancy exits are for chumps 

saltlordToday at 2:52 AM

LOL And then there's bree who's just like, "I thought we were getting food? I think your threats might be more effective when not on an empty stomach." Bree also 100% had a hermione moment as Eerb was walking away and was like "is that really what my hair (and ass) look like from the back?"

[klimpaloon-loves-superwholock]

I know this is a bit late, and I don’t usually make original posts, but I want to gather my thoughts on VLD s7, even though I literally never participate in fandom discourse lol. So I guess we’ll see how this goes. 

There were great parts of this season. Let’s start with that. 

First of all, Hunk was incredible and I’m so glad he finally got an arc where he could shine, even if I feel like it was long overdue. Seriously, I feel like Hunk was the best part of this season and I cannot state enough how much effect he had on my overall impression of the season. He basically carried the season singlehandedly and I don’t understand why searching through the tag rn I can hardly find any appreciation for him this season. (yeah jk I know why ha)

Everything they did with the Paladins’ families (from Hunk’s arc about rescuing his parents to Lance reuniting with his family and his relationship with Veronica to freaking Colleen!!!! just straight up stealing the show for two episodes!!! What an icon I love her so much!) was absolutely perfect. (I will say I’ve seen speculation that Hunk’s sister and her kids died since they weren’t there in his hospital room, which I desperately hope is not the case since that really should have been mentioned.) 

I also loved seeing Shiro take charge and become Captain of the Atlas without even seeming to realize that he was the man for the job. 

Sendak was a formidable and interesting villain who raised the stakes, which made it more satisfying when they defeated him. 

I enjoyed getting to know Romelle more and see her in action.

Coran and the mice’s team up to break out the rest of the gang was very good and funny.

KOSMO!!!!!!! A GOOD PUPPY!!!!!! HE HAS A NAME!! I LOVE HIM SO!!!

I enjoyed seeing Lotor’s ex-generals again (because I love them), although I do have some issues which I’ll get to later.

The new characters they introduced, mainly Rizavi, Leifsdottir, Kinkade, Veronica, and Griffin were all great and I loved them! They did a great job of making me care about these new people. (And Kinkade is drawn so pretty what the heck y’all sleepin on this beautiful dude)

Seriously Colleen was so great I cannot stress this enough. I’ve been feeling for this poor woman who thought that she’d lost her whole family since season 1 so I’m so glad to finally see her in action, fighting for her family and her planet.

They did a good job of setting up Admiral Sanda’s inevitable betrayal, even if it was a really stupid thing for her to do.

Ep 5 was great; I was super excited to see what the Druids looked like under their masks, Macidus and Keith’s teleporting fight was awesome, and it’s always great to see Allura’s magic develop more, even when I wish it wasn’t so unclear how/what she’s doing.

Lots of the fights were so cool, from the Voltron team taking down the Galra drones in the cave system in Ep 2 to all the MFE fights to Shiro’s rematch against Sendak to even Voltron’s fight against the Robeast. These fights, I’ve noticed, are always especially cool when they unlock a new ability like Hunk’s turrets and Voltron’s double swords. Also I forgot how strong Alteans are until Romelle just straight up ripped apart a drone.

As much as I overall didn’t like The Feud as an episode, it did have some great moments with Pidge taking down Bob, Allura and Hunk being cute in the background, and the team being overall really supportive and loving of each other. 

Shay came to visit Hunk!!!!!!!

Unfortunately, as you may have guessed, I also have a lot of problems with this season. Ones that, for me, are too serious to ignore. But let’s start with my more minor grievances, then work our way up to the big ones, shall we?

I don’t like Shiro’s new arm. It reminds me too much of Sendak’s and is too bulky/strange looking for for my taste. And for some reason my eyes have a hard time finding it? Like they’re drawn to the light emanating from his shoulder and not the forearm/hand. Idk, but I’m not a fan.

I wish Griffin had apologized to Keith for being such a jerk about his parents. I kept waiting for it since they had all these long glances with each other. I came to like him despite the bad initial impression only because he proved to be a good leader who valued every member of his team and knew when to step aside because someone else was better at a job. But I still kinda needed resolution for his rudeness, especially since he’s obviously grown since then and should want to make amends. 

Admiral Sanda’s just so freaking stupid????? Like, how did she get that high in ranking when she consistently makes such bad decisions???? Clearly the dictator who’s controlling earth who comes from a war-mongering culture that enslaves and destroys planets isn’t just gonna let y’all go once he gets Voltron. He’s either gonna continue using you as slaves because nothing’s stopping him or destroy you because you’re no longer useful. Listen to people who know the Galra better than you!!

I saw somewhere that Matt has a girlfriend now???? When did this happen????

They somehow got the ENTIRE BALMERA to Earth?!!!????!!?!?!?!? How did they build a teleduv big enough to do that!?!

Also, where did they get a teleduv? Did the Atlas have one? Or was that something that they built during the epilogue montage??

How did Keith summon his bayard telepathically?? Was that a Galra thing or a new Paladin ability?

How did Shiro manage to survive falling from space to earth on the outside of a ship while fighting Sendak?? I mean I’m really glad he lived, but??? How??

I don’t think we needed so much time dedicated to Sam Holt updating the Garrison and then the rest of earth on what happened in space. I kinda appreciated it since it’s been a long time since I watched the early seasons, but at the same time he didn’t tell them anything that was new information to us as viewers. The only things we gained from those scenes were how others reacted to this info. (And we still didn’t get to see the reaction of the person I was most interested in, Adam, but I’ll get to that later.)

This is a problem I’ve been having with the show since like season 3 or so, but how much time has passed? They actually explicitly said it at a couple of points this season, what with 3 years having gone by for most people but only a few weeks for the Voltron team, but why did that time difference happen? Also, how much time passed between the team leaving Earth and them fighting Lotor in last season’s finale? Because I could believe any time frame between 6 months to a few years for that, which makes a big difference in how old the paladins are. According to the show, Sam landed on earth 4 years before the team gets back to the Milky Way, so I guess Sam left the team a year before they faught Lotor??

I didn’t get the thing with Allura’s crown gem? Since when is that a power source? And I was really struck by the imagery of her literally throwing her crown away to help her friend, but I feel like it would’ve been more powerful if we had been given some information about what exactly that gem is and what it means for her. Just make this more clear for me. Also, Shiro has already lashed out and hurt people against his will, so I really didn’t need that angsty moment for him.

The B-plot in Ep 1 was tonally dissonant from the A-plot of Shiro’s flashbacks, and it ended up being totally useless anyway. As much as I enjoyed Romelle and Hunk’s banter in those parts, they would’ve been better placed somewhere else. They should’ve just dedicated the whole episode to Shiro’s flashbacks and given us more information about him.

If they were going to mention that Shiro had a progressive disease in his flashbacks, then they need to explicitly mention in the show that he doesn’t have it anymore. As it is, people who don’t know about the SDCC announcements are just gonna assume he still has it. If it doesn’t happen in the show, it’s not canon. Also, if he’s had this disease the whole time, then why is s7 the first time it’s mentioned? The way he held his arm in the flashback reminded me of the way he held it when his Galra arm activated for the first time. Did the arm help fight the progression of the disease like that lil wristband did? If so, that should’ve been explained and made clear a long time ago. It just bothers me that this is the first time we’re hearing about this major part of Shiro’s life that he’s been fighting with, and that in show we’re given absolutely no resolution for it.

I guess the gem powering Shiro’s arm and the Castleship diamond powering the Atlas connected somehow?? Which is how Shiro turned it into a giant robot?     ??????????????? I’m genuinely very confused on what was going on there. It needed to be made more clear. I was on board for whatever they were doing at first just because Shiro looked so pretty in that lighting, but they took it in the weirdest direction possible. Why would anyone care about Voltron anymore when you’ve got a bigger, stronger robot now? Voltron’s no longer the most powerful weapon in the universe - the Atlas is. And it only became such by coincidence. Which is just. Irritating.

The Feud episode. Oh boy. First of all, I got some serious emotional whiplash from the change to this episode. It just didn’t seem to fit in with the rest of the season at all. Second, they just really did not have to spend that much time making fun of Lance for being stupid. Especially when he’s not. Also, the first two of the people he had to identify had masks on, and Lance had only met them briefly. ALSO you’re telling me that Lance, the most social and outgoing of the Voltron team, is the one who’s bad with names/faces????? ALSO spending less time teasing Lance would’ve opened up more time for giving Hunk and Allura their own activities. ALSO everyone else on the team gets a little speech about how they’re valuable, but Lance just gets “I don’t want to be stuck with him forever”?????? That’s so freaking messed up. Third, the whole premise of the episode was strange to me. Like why would an all powerful being who tests heroes do it in this way? It seems to me that that premise fits Ep 6, where they were stranded in space, much better. They were genuinely tested then, and the forces that attacked them and propelled them through lightyears of space were never explained, so saying that Bob did it and propelled them towards their goal as a reward for passing the test could’ve been a satisfying answer to those questions. And fourth, can I also ask why Morvok was the fourth player?? Like he’s a nonentity in terms of villains. And they still didn’t have the same number of players as team Voltron. Haggar’s still alive, so they could’ve put Sendak on there too. And for the fifth player they could’ve put on a fan favorite villain character. One who showed up in more episodes than Morvok did. One who died a while back and who the fans have wanted to see again ever since. Like, I don’t know, NARTI!! Ugh.

The Robeast. I just. This season could’ve ended on a pretty high note if they had just cut that out and just went straight to the lil epilogue after defeating Sendak. As cool as that fight was at parts, it caused a pretty low finale, which is pretty disappointing after last season’s incredible finale. I get that they needed to foreshadow Haggar’s return to this fight or whatever they’re doing for next season and that she’s been working on the lost Alteans, apparently, but it was just a strange note to end on. Especially with the weird addition of Atlas to the Giant Robot Squad. And Allura’s line “Seriously? We just defeated Sendak and now we gotta deal with this?!?!” (I’m paraphrasing) was a MOOD.

Okay, so this post has gotten kinda out of control, so I’m gonna have to save the biggest issue I had (betcha can guess what it is) for another post. So. Look out for Part 2 of this nonsense. Feel free to reblog with your own ideas/input!