#gimmie your monet

[sergeant-macho-nacho]

Jean ‘Moebius’ Gira

[bitterkarella]

Midnight Pals: Monetizing Twitter

Stephen King: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of Elon Musk: [emerging from bushes] eeeey stephano king Barker: hey look steve it's your best pal! King: King: do we have to keep doing this King: we've had like literally 2 interactions ever

Musk: so stephano king you say you no pay $8 for twitter King: no elon i am not going to pay $8 to post on the internet Musk:   Musk: mama mia i no getta it Musk: it work forra lowtax

Musk: [praying at shrine to Lowtax] Santa Lowtax, heara my prayers Musk: tella me what i musta do Musk: how i getta $8 from posters Musk: mama mia my god hassa forsaken me!

Musk: eeeey stephano king i getta it now Musk: santa lowtax, he maka da website people want to pay $8 to post on Musk: i do-a the same! pixelated ape emoji w/hexagonal avatar: hot new girl on onlyfans pixelated ape emoji w/hexagonal avatar: hot wet girl

King: submitted for the pixelated ape emoji w/hexagonal avatar: suck and fuck King: approval of the pixelated ape emoji w/hexagonal avatar: would you fuck her King: mid pixelated ape emoji w/hexagonal avatar: girls girls girls

Musk: eeeey stephano king how you like my website now? issa better now eh? King: no, now it's clogged with spambots Musk: so now you wanna pay $8 eh? King: no, i want to pay for it even less now Musk: Musk: mama mia where i go wrong

Musk: mama mia dis a problem worthy ova da smartest man inna da world Musk: i justa apply da facts and logic Musk: and ussa my genius science-a brain Musk: anna che bello! i gotta da answer Musk: [pointing flintlock at king] NOW you pay da $8

King: whoa elon let's not do anything hasty! Musk: you force-a me to use-a force stephano king Musk: i solve-a this like i getta da cyberpunk videogame cameo Musk: [pouring black powder into flintlock] now you no-a move Musk: [packing lead shot with ramrod] just gimmie a sec

Musk: [aiming flintlock] santa lowtax guide-a my hand King: let's talk this over elon Barker: elon, don't do it! think of your hero lowtax. he wouldn't commit murder for $8! Barker: just think -- what would lowtax do? Musk: well he woulda Musk: Musk: he woulda Musk: Musk: Musk:

[lafrantumaglia]

🌱💫🔮MY RANDOM HOROSCOPE🔮💫🌱

which includes: colors, planets, food, flowers, dog breeds, painters, tarot cards, pokemons, songs from carly rae jepsen’s album “emotion”, novels by haruki murakami and movies from studio ghibli

(2019 edition)

aries:

color: yellow /// celestial object: mars /// food: curried rice /// flower: daffodil /// dog breed: siberian husky /// famous painter: joan miró /// tarot card: the lovers (VI) /// pokemon: ninetales /// song from carly rae jepsen’s album “emotion”: warm blood /// haruki murakami novel: a wild sheep chase ///studio ghibli movie: my neighbor totoro

taurus:

color: brown /// celestial object: saturn /// food: burger and fries /// flower: carnation /// dog breed: shar pei /// famous painter: frida kahlo /// tarot card: the chariot (VII) /// pokemon: tauros /// song from carly rae jepsen’s album “emotion”: gimmie love /// haruki murakami novel: hear the wind sing, pinball 1973 /// studio ghibli movie: porco rosso

gemini:

color: white /// celestial object: mercury /// food: blue cheese /// flower: tulip /// dog breed: dachshund /// famous painter: edvard munch /// tarot card: the wheel of fortune (X) /// pokemon: ditto /// song from carly rae jepsen’s album “emotion”: when i needed you /// haruki murakami novel: norwegian wood /// studio ghibli movie: nausicaä of the valley of the wind

cancer:

color: purple /// celestial object: the moon /// food: soup /// flower: chrysanthemum /// dog breed: saint bernard /// famous painter: giotto /// tarot card: the moon (XVIII) /// pokemon: kingler /// song from carly rae jepsen’s album “emotion”: i didn't just come here to dance /// haruki murakami novel: 1Q84 /// studio ghibli movie: from up on poppy hill

leo:

color: gold /// celestial object: the sun /// food: creamy noodles /// flower: sunflower /// dog breed: chow chow /// famous painter: gustav klimt /// tarot card: the strenght (XI), the sun (XIX) ///pokemon: ho-oh /// song from carly rae jepsen’s album “emotion”: emotion /// haruki murakami novel: kafka on the shore /// studio ghibli movie: whisper of the heart

virgo:

color: pink /// celestial object: stars /// food: salad ///flower: jasmine /// dog breed: corgi /// famous painter: hieronymus bosch /// tarot card: the star (XVII) /// pokemon: gloom /// song from carly rae jepsen’s album “emotion”: boy problems /// haruki murakami novel: south of the border, west of the sun /// studio ghibli movie: ocean waves

libra:

color: lilac /// celestial object: venus /// food: ice cream /// flower: lotus flower /// dog breed: collie /// famous painter: claude monet /// tarot card: the justice (VIII) /// pokemon: alakazam /// song from carly rae jepsen’s album “emotion”: making the most of the night /// haruki murakami novel: after dark /// studio ghibli movie: only yesterday

scorpio:

color: black, silver /// celestial object: pluto /// food: pizza with black olives /// flower: rose /// dog breed: german shepherd /// famous painter: francisco de goya /// tarot card: the devil (XV) /// pokemon: gengar /// song from carly rae jepsen’s album “emotion”: black heart /// haruki murakami novel: hard-boiled wonderland and the end of the world /// studio ghibli movie: kiki's delivery service

sagittarius:

color: red /// celestial object: the earth /// food: tacos /// flower: gerbera /// dog breed: golden retriever /// famous painter: wassily kandinsky /// tarot card: the magician (I) /// pokemon: charizard /// song from carly rae jepsen’s album “emotion”: run away with me /// haruki murakami novel: the wind-up bird chronicle /// studio ghibli movie: princess mononoke

capricorn:

color: dark green /// celestial object: jupiter /// food: barbecue /// flower: lily /// dog breed: greyhound /// famous painter: raphael /// tarot card: the empress (III), the emperor (IV) /// pokemon: ampharos /// song from carly rae jepsen’s album “emotion”: your type /// haruki murakami novel: dance dance dance /// studio ghibli movie: spirited away

aquarius:

color: light blue /// celestial object: uranus /// food: sushi /// flower: cherry blossom /// dog breed: shiba inu /// famous painter: henri matisse /// tarot card: the temperance (XIV) /// pokemon: lugia /// song from carly rae jepsen’s album “emotion”: all that /// haruki murakami novel: sputnik sweetheart /// studio ghibli movie: the wind rises

pisces:

color: dark blue /// celestial object: neptune /// food: black coffee /// flower: hydrangea /// dog breed: beagle /// famous painter: pablo picasso /// tarot card: the high priestess (II), the hierophant (V) /// pokemon: tentacruel /// song from carly rae jepsen’s album “emotion”: LA hallucinations /// haruki murakami novel: colorless tsukuru tazaki and his years of pilgrimage /// studio ghibli movie: howl's moving castle

can you guess my sign???

[godedits]

playlist

1 night - charli xcx

TG4M - zara larsson

WILD - troye sivan

YOUTH - troye sivan

adore - ariana grande

again - noah cyrus

all the years - camila cabello

angel - fifth harmony

bad liar - selena gomez

be alright - ariana grande

better days - ariana grande

break your heart right back - ariana grande

casanova - allie x

consideration - rihanna

doo wop - glee cast

ease - troye sivan

dumb dumb - red velvet

everybody dies in their nightmares - XXXTENTACION

faithful - justin bieber

feels - kiiara

gimmie love - carly rae jepsen

high luv - victoria monet

home to mama - justin bieber

i don't care - ariana grande

i'll show you - justin bieber

i'm stuck - noah cyrus

intro - ariana grande

knew better / forever boy - ariana grande

let me love you - ariana grande

life is worth living - justin bieber

make me (cry) - noah cyrus

lifted - allie x 

maniac - jhené aiko

moves - big sean

mrs. potato head - melanie martinez

my everything - ariana grande

need you - allie x

new rules - dua lipa

no pressure - justin bieber

night changes - one direction

nobody - selena gomez

now or never - halsey

old habits die hard - allie x

omg - camila cabello

one last time - ariana grande

only 1 - ariana grande

plz don't go - jhené aiko

overdose - alessia cara

quit - ariana grande

rooting for my baby - miley cyrus

real friends - camila cabello

say it - tove lo

the way - ariana grande

thinking bout you - ariana grande

too much to dream - allie x

true love - ariana grande

u don't know - justine skye

trust - justin bieber

undercover - khelani

underdog - banks

what's hatnin' - justin bieber

whippin - kiiara

why try - ariana grande

wild thoughts - rihanna

woo - rihanna

you & i - onde direction

playlist no spotify

[loveisaviolence2]

halsey sentence meme. from hopeless fountain kingdom. part two.              (   part one.   )

lie.

breakfast is cold, as cold as our bed.

i’m watching you choke down the words that you said.

i watch you devour, mistake me for bread.

well boy, is you fed? or are you misled?

i gave you the messiest head.

you give me the messiest head.

you turnin’ red.

you wish i was dead.

see you ‘bouta break a sweat.

i won’t let us finish yet.

please don’t take this as a threat.

if you don’t love me no more, then lie.

i heard what you said.

i know that it’s fire flame.

your mouth make a hurricane.

you notice that we in love.

there’s something we cannot change.

it’s the plans we should arrange.

treat her right and she won’t complain.

bring back the title.

got no one to lie to.

there’s no need to lie no more.

bring me a trial.

every move’s vital.

what you gon’ die for, when everyday you told lies.

walls could talk.

been about three days, and i’m comin’ back.

i’m about four days from a heart attack.

i think you make me a maniac. 

we’ve both been seventeen.

fist fight in a limousine. 

but they don’t know.

we both hope there’s something.

we both keep fronting.

it’s a closed discussion.

i'm thinking, ' damn, if these walls could talk. '

shit is crazy, right?

i ain’t your baby no more.

been about two weeks since you went away.

i’m about half way through a cabernet. 

i’m wasting a saturday.

you’re so damn good with a bobby pin.

now you’re gonna play me like a violin.

bad at love.

it tastes like jack when i’m kissing him.

so i told him i never really liked his friends.

now he’s gone and he’s calling me a bitch again.

he told me we don’t make it ‘til we graduate.

i told him the music would be worth the wait.

he wants me in the kitchen with a dinner plate.

i believe that we’re meant to be.

jealousy gets the best of me.

i don’t mean to frustrate.

i always make the same mistakes.

i’m bad at love.

i’m bad at love, but you can’t blame me for trying.

you can’t blame me for trying.

you know i’d be lying saying you were the one that could finally fix me.

looking at my history, i’m bad at love.

i thought that she could really be the one this time.

i never got the chance to make her mine.

she fell in love with little thin white lines.

we never told no one but we look so cute.

i always think about it when i’m riding through.

i know you’re afraid i’m gonna walk away.

each time the feeling fades.

don’t play.

lookin' as fine as a damn monet.

everybody thirsty, drinks on me.

tryna take back what you say to me.

i don't give a damn what you say to me.

there ain't no time for games and me.

i’m moving on.

i’m getting paid.

i’m on my own.

i had some space to deal with it.

it’s getting late.

go and grab someone and find a place to deal with it.

motherfucker, don’t play with me.

i am not the type to be out past dawn.

i am not the type to admit i’m on.

women don’t play no games.

strangers.

she doesn't kiss me on the mouth anymore.

it's more intimate than she thinks we should get.

she doesn't look me in the eyes anymore.

too scared of what she'll see, somebody holding me.

when i wake up all alone, and i’m thinking of your skin, i remember what you told me.

we’re not lovers, we’re not strangers.

we're just strangers with the same damn hunger to be touched, to be loved, to feel anything at all.

she doesn’t call me on the phone anymore.

she’s never listening.

she says it’s innocent.

i must’ve crossed a line.

i must’ve lost my mind.

i miss the mornings with you laying in my bed.

i miss the memories replaying in my head.

i miss the thought of a forever, you and me.

all you’re missing is my body.

you lost it.

angel on fire.

i woke up to another mess in the living room.

they came again in the night under crescent moon, didn’t wake me in my sleep.

they talk and drink and laugh 'bout things and fall in love in my backyard.  

i hide and cower in the corner.

conversation’s getting hard.

nobody seems to ask about me anymore.

nobody seems to care about anything i think.

nobody seems to recognize me in the crowd in the background screaming,  ‘ everybody, look at me. ’

i’m faded away.

you know, i used to be on fire.

i’m standing on the ashes of who i used to be.

i used to be a darling starlet like a centerpiece, had the whole world wrapped around my ring.

i flew too closely to the sun that's setting in the east and now I'm melting from my wings.

i'd talk and drink and laugh 'bout things and fall in love in my backyard.

now it’s my own anxiety that makes the conversation hard.

devil in me.

you said i would've hit the ceiling.

you said i should eat my feelings, head held high.

i won't take anyone down if I cry tonight.

i still let everyone down when i change in size.

i went tumbling down trying to reach your high.

i scream too loud if I speak my mind.

i don’t wanna wake it up, the devil in me.

gotta wake up.

come back to life.

you said i’m too much to handle.

you said i shine too bright.

i burnt the candle, flew too high.

now i gotta wake it up, the devil in me.

hopeless.

you make it look so easy.

promise that I'm gonna call you back in five.

sorry baby girl, but I can't tonight.

you make it look so simple.

i've known that girl for like my whole life.

back in my hotel and I'm alone inside.

the truth hurts, but secrets kill.

can’t help but thinking that i love it still.

there must be something real.

the good die young, but so did this.

it must be better than i think it is.

gimmie those eyes.

it’s easy to forgive.

you and all your friends all hate me.

you think i’m better when i’m not around.

hear me on the radio and turn it down.

i can’t help the way you made me.

hope that she believin' in the truth you found.

i can’t find out.

i hope hopeless changes over time.

[topicprinter]

Hi r/Entrepreneur,My name is Kevin and I design, develop, and market a series of light show apps for iOS and Android under the Light DJ brand. 2 years ago, I made a post about my journey into Entrepreneurship which you can find here. Today I’d like to provide an update on my business and answer any questions that you may have about my methods.From 2017-2018 I had few major projects. My first priority was to update the Android app to match the effects of the iOS version. Previously I had decided to build these as two native apps rather than a hybrid app and that’s resulted in two slightly different feature sets between the apps as they’ve grown at different paces. Now the apps produce the same lighting effects and I intend to maintain effect parity going forward. I still think having two native apps is the right option for my purposes. Using native tools and support makes it easy to integrate third-party libraries and debug on Stack Overflow when things go awry. I develop on iOS first because it’s easier to prototype with Swift, then I port the feature to Android/Java from there. Writing the code the second time isn’t too bad since going from Swift to Java is fairly simple, plus translating it forces you to do a thorough review of your own code. I’ve fixed more than a few bugs this way.Nanoleaf Aurora support was another focus this period. The hardware had just been released and I was excited to branch out from bulb-based effects to panels. Integrating with new third-party hardware is risky and exponentially increases testing time so I have to be selective as to who I integrate with. I chose Nanoleaf because I could see the potential of the product and because they have mass-market availability in Apple Stores and Best Buy. I’ve had the pleasure of meeting Nanoleaf's CEO Gimmy Chu and his team a few times. They’ve been great to work with, open to suggestions, and are just really cool people. My latest version includes support for the new square Canvas tiles too and I’ll continue to update the code as new shapes are released.In September 2017 I released a moonshot app called Light DJ Studio which presents a new concept in mobile light shows. Users record a light track guitar-hero style, in sync to any Apple Music track. They can save the track for later playback or (as of Oct 2018) share it with the Light DJ community so that others can enjoy it too. Currently the app is completely free while the library of user-submitted tracks slowly grows (currently ~40) and anyone that submits a track gets free access for life if I ever do monetize it. I designed the light recordings so that they work with any light setup, so even if the creator makes their light recording on Hue it will still work on Nanoleaf or LIFX or vice-versa. There’s a ton of potential in this app and I hope to one day work with DJs and other musicians to release exclusive light shows for the app.In January 2018, Philips Hue announced its Hue Entertainment API, which provided an opportunity for my app to stand out from the other entertainment apps for Hue. Hue Entertainment allows games and other media to stream real-time effects to your living room. For me, this meant high-performance effects like faster strobes and smoother waves that travel across the room. I spent about 2 months redesigning all 40+ effects in my app to work with the new API and Light DJ was one of the first apps to have this support. While the performance improvements were astounding, sales were not. Since my business model was "pay-once, get everything” the power users who really wanted this feature got it for free, but users who were new to Hue or my app didn’t care or know what it was, so it did not add much apparent value. Add to that the traditional spring slump that happens as people start getting outdoors more around April & May and my daily proceeds started to dropping to double-digits. Clearly drastic changes were needed to save my business.I considered creating more in-app purchases for new hardware support, but I really hate nickle-and-diming users for every little thing and it results in a ton of extra code to handle all the extra limitations. If my business is to be successful then consistent recurring revenue is a must and so in the end I decided that the only rational option was to move to a subscription model. This has provided many benefits:Recurring subscription revenue is easier to predict. That makes me more comfortable hiring people to help me grow my business and helps me sleep at night.I can afford to pay for marketing since the average revenue per user is higher.Users are more engaged. Average time-in-app is up, and so are daily/monthly active users. The theory is that users who pay more for an app value it more and are more likely to use it.I can continue to add features and hardware support freely without having to be concerned with things like selling a certain feature then moving/merging it later and having to figure out how to continue to give partial access.50% reduction in Apple fees on subscriptions over 1 year.Ability to support cross-platform subscriptions (coming soon).There were a few downsides to moving to subscriptions, however. The move was not popular with users who were used to the previous freemium model and hadn’t upgraded, resulting in negative reviews. Previous purchasers received free lifetime updates, so they are not a source of revenue. The price of the Android subscription started the same as iOS even though it had fewer features so I lowered the price after a month of dismal sales. Though the subscription includes a 7-day free trial, users were hesitant to sign-up so I introduced a preview period for users to try out the app for a bit before committing. Additionally in order to sell auto-renewable subscriptions on the App Store you need to sell something “of substance”. For me, that means I’m obligated to produce and provide 2 bonus effects per month to users as part of the subscription (abstract promises like “future updates�� won’t cut it). I make the effects in batches of a dozen or so and it takes me a few weeks to create and test them for both OSs. While I generally enjoy making these it’s still a task that I’ll be required to do every 6 months or so for as long as the app is producing revenue.Metrics:Ok, so here’s why a lot of you clicked. The truth is that I don’t spend all day staring at my metrics looking for incremental improvements. My focus is always on finding the best way to add value to my service and creating a valuable service is what will drive good numbers. I follow the Valve Manifesto as I believe that it’s a better way to create a quality product.Of note in the sales data: New Years Eve continues to be the biggest day for downloads and sales of the app. Subscriptions were introduced July 1, resulting in 1 week of no sales (there was a last chance sale on June 30). In addition to subscriptions I continue to offer a fully unlocked version of the app in both app stores (at a higher price) for users that don’t want to deal with the subscription.Sales data (viewable for a limited time): https://lightdjapp.com/sales (password: ilovereddit)Daily Active Users: ~1,200Monthly Active Users: ~33,000Subscription conversion: 59%Subscription retention: 74%Outlook:For 2019 my focus is on improving retention by increasing the value of subscriptions through new community features including pattern and sheet sharing, cross-platform subscriptions, cloud-backed settings, and a web portal where users can purchase and manage subscriptions. Nanoleaf Canvas support will be a big help when it comes to marketing content creation since the square panels are easier to work with than the triangles. Aside from that I have a whole laundry list of app features that I’ve been wanting to create and a dozen or so unfulfilled user requests that will keep me busy. I’ll also be on the lookout for any new hardware that could work with the app.I hope this post provides a bit of insight into my business and helps encourage future developers to give it a shot on the App Store. I'd love to answer any questions you have about my business or development practices.Cheers,Kevin

[sergeant-macho-nacho]

Jean ‘Moebius’ Gira

[sergeant-macho-nacho]

Forced reset trigger for Glock all 3d printed babee. It's on "the sea" under the name Chuckle button.

[sergeant-macho-nacho]

You know the argument for gun control is bull by the fact that they haven't started expanding public transportation. Cars are dangerous, expensive to regulate, bad for the environment, make it easier for criminals to do crimes, ect.

So if we can get rid of guns then pay the police more to protect us then why can't we get rid of cars and have public transportation?

I think the same reason during the great depression they stopped Corn farmers from making automobile fuel and someone who makes $100 a year still has to pay income tax.

[sergeant-macho-nacho]