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wraithdance · 1 month

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The Five Year Plan | Gaz x Reader

Synopsis: When your fiancé breaks up with you, you start to question your timeline; who needs a man when you can have a baby yourself? Who better to ask for help on creating one than your arch-nemesis Kyle Garrick?

Note: F!Reader, Fat/Plus sized Reader, Reader is implied to be Black but can be read as WoC, Readers nickname is 'Siggy', there will be no y/n use Content warning: none; besides a terrible grasp of british-isms

Chapter One: Piss off Kyle

It was while sitting beneath the awning of your favorite bistro that you’d come to a great realization. Hugo Montclair, your fiance of three years, was not just a bore but a bit of a jackass.

Also, the lavender cake was no longer listed on Le Misa’s menu. So, technically two great realizations. As bad as it sounded, one concerned you more than the other.

Squinting you give the laminated sheet another thorough read to confirm your suspicions and… ah, yes. It’s not there. Where it should be between the ladies fingers and the lemon cake is an empty, discolored space.

With a manicured finger you chip away at the corners to reveal the sloping letter ‘L’ beneath the meticulously placed correction tape.

This was no good.

“Siggy, darling have you heard a word I said?”

You hum in reply, still deeply baffled with the current conundrum. Hugo calls your name again, not satisfied until you’ve given him your attention.

He leans his head down to be in your line of sight. He’s a bit too blonde and polished for you not to focus your attention on. Like a shiny beacon. You try not to sigh deeply and instead plaster on a smile.

“Yes, I heard you darling, you want to break up because you’re seeing Maddie from downstairs.”

Hugo extends his dainty manicured hands across the small table to cover yours above the menu.

“I’m so sorry, I never wanted to hurt you this way.”

His eyes are carefully soft and his expression does that awkward stretch people do when attempting to project a facsimile of contriteness. In this case it just makes the skin around his mouth pucker oddly, displacing the filler he swears he gets for preventive measures.

You pat his hand politely with a smile “It’s fine, Hugo, really. Do you think I can borrow your menu? I think there's been a bit of a mistake.”

You are sliding the paper to your side of the table before you can finish the sentence. Hugo is a bit taken aback and blanches.

Another sweeping glance at Hugo’s menu reveals much of the same.

There’s no lavender cake.

“Look, I know this is hard to take in but I want us to try to at least be amicable. We’ve been together for years and your parents and friends adore me.”

At this you snort but quickly cover it with a cough. Your parents tolerated him at best and your friends had made it well known they disapproved of Hugo. (Something about being a posh chihuahua enamored with its own self importance.)

You frown thinking of the dramatics his mother would put on inevitably, so sure you’d ruined the engagement to her son on purpose.

But really what could you do?

It wasn’t the most convenient thing to have your boss's beloved son kick you to the metaphorical curb, but technically you were the one who had been cheated on. Totally not your fault this time!

“I said I got it, you can’t help who you love and etcetera.” You give a cluck of your tongue before looking up once more hoping to catch the circling barista's eye.

The mid afternoon lunch crowd at Le Misa’s is blessedly tame for a Thursday. The gloomy weather outside makes it easier to spot the jittery teen in a crimson red apron. The poor girl is glued to a corner, hunched over and clutching a notepad in white knuckle grip.

She sees you shift in her periphery and snaps terrified eyes to your half raised arm. You do your best to smile sans teeth as you wave her over, coaxing her closer with small fluid movements.

You hope you’re projecting calming vibes because she looks a bit green around the gills from the very thought of being needed by a customer.

When she’s meters from your table you lean forward, your tits and belly squash a bit over the table causing your empty saucer to clatter before settling. Hugo, despite his offended chittering, stops long enough to stare at your chest. With a roll of your eyes you ignore his open panting. Typical.

“Hi darling,” you chirp in an octave higher than your usual. “I just had a quick question about the cakes? There used to be a lavender one here, I’ve been ordering it for years. Can you tell me what happened to it?”

“Um w-well.” The trembling girl blinks are twitchy and rapid, sputtering out um’s and oh’s.

‘Oh, no’ you think to yourself.

You might have broken her. Still, you nod your head in support waiting for her to gather her wits. The poor thing was obviously a new employ with a bitch of a case of social anxiety.

Your efforts are for nothing in the end because a loud clearing throat causes you both to freeze, just as it’s seem she’d gotten up her courage.

Your cheek ticks as you watch the skittish girl clam up again. Hugo’s gaze has pried off your cleavage long enough to laser something disapproving and pointed at the side of your forehead.

He’s even doing that thing with his face that you’ve always hated. His cheeks suck in like a goldfish and he does the eyebrow raise and head cock that screams ‘I am very displeased.’

“What? I just need to ask her something. I'll be just a sec.”

Hugo’s frown only deepens and he lets out the most dramatic sigh you’ve ever heard from a thirty two year old man.

It causes you to roll your eyes. Really, why couldn’t he just break up with you through text? This whole kerfuffle was starting to drag on and ruin your already limited lunch hour.

What happened to just saying ‘it’s not you, it’s me?’ or ghosting like a normal person?

You give the hovering teenager a tight smile and lift a single manicured finger to signify the need for a moment. She scurries back into the safety of the French doors into the cafe's interior before your hand has a chance to lower.

“Hugo darling,” Your tone is careful, neutral like the one you use to disarm your irate clients.

“I’m really not upset I promise, we’d barely begun planning the wedding and we never got around to moving in with each other. Really there’s no harm-”

“She's pregnant.” he blurts out suddenly.

A record scratches in your brain because, “What?”

Hugo grimaces. “She’s about three months pregnant. I didn’t know how to tell you.”

One blink. Two… before you’re sure there wasn’t a punchline coming.

“Are you taking the piss right now?”

“Sweetheart,” His hands raise in defense “don’t get upset-”

“Oh what the actual FUCK Hugo? You told me you wanted to wait until marriage before considering children!” Your hiss is low and dark.

More than a small part of you is satisfied with his flinch back to avoid your venom. You're slightly aware of the scene you’re causing but really! The man had kept his sperm under lock and key like his swimmers were precious jewels!

It’s the one thing he’d put his foot down about, content to let you drive the relationship otherwise.

‘I have to be considerate of my legacy as a Montclair, Siggy.’

‘We can talk about it after the wedding, Siggy.’

You didn’t understand the hang up because the Montclair clan were as distant from the crown as you were to Beyoncé! Still he’d been adamant about not having a child out of wedlock.

You’re not very kind about reminding him of the fact either.

“I did mean that, I swear,” he ruffles his coiffed blonde hair, the pomade holding firm but is no match for the havoc his slender fingers trail. “It just happened and Madelyn and I decided it was a good thing.”

He huffs “I mean let’s be realistic Siggy, she’s different from you. She’s a bit more equipped to take care of a child than you are.”

Oh ho! Now that was rich. You were chomping at the bit to hear how the barely legal heiress was better equipped to birth a baby than you were!

“How so!” Your tone is one translating the utmost disbelief and sarcasm.

Hugo waves a hand in the air, it’s so dismissive and you consider punching him in the nose for it. “She’s just much more flexible.”

Well ouch?

There’s a Rolodex of adjectives your litany of exes used to describe you before they dumped you.

Uptight, strict, aloof, intense. ‘Heartless harpy who feeds on the souls of innocent men’.

The last one came from a starving poet who’d been freeloading on your nice suede green couch before you'd kicked him and his lute out. How you managed to find the one man in London with dreams of being a modern day bard, who knows.

(You did admire his ways with words and his tongue was capable of art). It had admittedly stung a bit more than the others and you needed an extra hen session with the girls to unpack the resulting feels.

Nonetheless, you’ve never been called inflexible.

Matter of fact, you were pretty fucking flexible! Your Pilates teacher had crowed about it several times during class, thank you very much. (Maybe he was just trying to get you to put out but still, a compliment was a compliment.)

Momentarily you consider if that was actually supposed to be a dig at your weight but Hugo frantically rambles on as if reading your mind.

“I just mean that you work long hours at Mum’s firm and you’ve told me yourself you wouldn’t stop working even if you were pregnant.”

“So what!”

“So, that’s an awful way to raise a child Siggy! Madelyn works for herself and has the time to dedicate to a baby that you don’t.”

“Of course she has the time!” you cry out in exasperation, ignoring Hugo’s shushing. If he wanted you to react better he shouldn’t have dropped this bomb in public!

“She teaches yoga to the elderly in her perfect fucking apartment! I’ve been a barrister for all of 2 seconds and I can’t just give up my position!”

Hugo rolls his eyes with the dramatic flare only an aristocrat could pull off. “I’ve been trying to work on our relationship for months; you’ve blown me off every time saying you were working or there was a crisis with your friends.”

“I thought proposing would change things but…” The sad look does make some guilt well up into your veins.

Hugo’s shoulder drop and his blue eyes are a bit misty. It makes your throat close with panic. Hugo was prone to sobbing and you really needed to intercept that train before it derailed.

“Hugo-”

“It doesn’t even feel like you like me sometimes!” He’s hiccuping and throwing his hands in the air in exasperation before you know it.

Oh for fucks sake!

“It’s like you view me as more of a convenience than a partner. I’ve only ever seen you truly happy over coupons or work or cakes!”

Fat tears roll down his face and you’re handing him your linen napkin with a sigh. He thanks you and blows his nose loudly enough for other tables to glance your way. Wonderful.

When he composes himself you try to refute him.

“Hugo, that's not true, I like you,” His gives you a look of complete disbelief that sets you on the defense. “Really I do! I just…”

Your brows furrow as words evade you. You really wish he would have just broken up with you via text.

“I show it differently that’s all.” Your shoulders sag in defeat.

Hugo gives you a sad smile. It’s watery and his face is still a bit splotchy.

“But not like Madelyn does. Be honest, did you ever love me?”

You feel like an absolute bitch because you can’t answer him. After a while you both accept that it was about as much as you could say.

It’s only when you’re halfway to the office that you realize you never did get an answer about the cake.

Kyle Garrick had a radar for when you were about to make a fool of yourself. The man had somehow been privy to every embarrassing moment you’ve had in your shared building. You couldn’t prove it, but he had to have some kind of sixth sense for your personal humiliation.

There was no other explanation because the entire six years you’d lived across from him, he was always conveniently near when shit went awry.

Like that time you locked yourself out wearing only a ratty towel when reaching for a parcel. His stupidly pretty face only twitched in amusement seeing you hunched over and dripping wet.

You’d been attempting to jimmy the cheap lock with a stray paper clip you found discarded nearby. It hadn’t gone well, as you’d been more focused on trying to keep your tits and thighs within the thin, cotton fabric.

(They really should make towels for bigger girls more accessible, honestly it was ridiculous!)

It hadn’t been your finest moment but he could have had the decency to look away. Instead, he leaned his broad shoulder against his doorway, content to watch you struggle.

You’d snapped at him asking what his problem was and his only reply was ‘nippy in here, isn’t it?’

He did eventually help you break into your flat, but only after you’d called him as many names as you could think of. He’d waited out your tantrum without as much of a twitch. He’d simply taken the paper clip from you and sank to the floor in front of the doorknob.

His big hands were surprisingly much more dexterous than yours. You’d never admit to the lump in your throat or the shudder starting at your toes while staring at the long brown digits.

It didn’t help that his whiskey colored eyes bore into yours with an unspoken question when you made a panicked sound. The side of his head had grazed your breasts and the back of the hand holding your towel when he shifted on his knees. The light touch was clearly accidental, but still molten lava shot through you like a rocket on fire.

Intrusive thoughts of him kneeling before you in another context caused you to choke on your saliva. You tried so hard to clear your throat subtly but an embarrassing wheezing sound still managed to escape. Add insult to injury, the infuriating man had to pat your back when your body wracked with coughs.

You weren’t proud that you told him to fuck right off when he finally got the door open. You ignored his sarcastic ‘You’re welcome, luv” and slammed the door in his smug face.

That was nearly two years ago and the start of your vendetta against the irritating neighbor.

Per usual, he finds you just outside your doorway causing a scene. This time, you’re being clung to by your now ex-fiancés mistress.

Madelyn’s wails are loud, keening things that are razor sharp against your eardrums. Her tearful pleading is loud enough for you to miss the ding of the elevator as it stops on your floor.

Kyle strides from the lift like a living bronzed Adonis.

With gritted teeth you curse every deity known to mankind.

Wonderful. Truly, amazing actually!

He’s clearly coming back from a run, His arms are comically large and gleaming with a thin layer of sweat on his brown skin. You’re able to make out the intricate tattooed shield containing the numbers ‘141’ on his bicep. It’s the first you’d seen of it (not that you were keeping an eye out for it before).

His sleeveless jumper is damp and half zipped to show off a view of his firm pectorals and the first row of his 6-pack. You’re about to peak lower to his loose gym shorts when he catches your stray perusal and raises a singular brow.

“Everything alright, love?”

“Just peachy, Kyle, thank you.” you snipe in a clipped tone. “Please feel free to run along.”

Your snarky dismissal is prickly enough that most people would call you a cunt but would blessedly sod off.

The disgustingly fit nuisance just removes his headphones from around the cartilage of his ears and continues to linger just outside his door with crossed arms. Behind Madelyn’s trembling back you make a harried shoo-ing gesture. It’s meant to somehow relay that you had everything under control.

You did not of course, but the last thing you could stand right now is Kyle fucking Garrick in the mix of this shit-show. No matter how angelic the bastard looked in the dim lighting of the hallway, he had an uncanny ability to piss on all of your emotional reserves.

“Siggy!” Madelyn’s blubbering cuts off Kyle's next words. “I’m so, SO sorry!” She immediately descends into another fit of sobs against your cleavage.

There’s a bit of an awkward lull when Kyle snorts out a laugh.“You think she can breathe in there?”

With closed eyes you lean your head back to look at the ceiling, shooting a ‘fuck you very much’ to the universe.

You’d come home 20 minutes prior with murderous miasma cloaking you like a second skin. After being publicly dumped (without even the comfort of sweets to soothe the humiliation) you’d gone straight back to work just to deal with piles upon piles of paperwork.

Your only reprieve was Hugo’s mother canceling her standing appointment with you. You’d still been forced to work with the old woman’s assistant and to your disdain, he was just as persnickety as his employer.

By the time you’d made it home on aching feet and a splitting headache your thoughts were filled with the desire to stuff yourself with a big fat American cheeseburger. Specifically one from the shady shop around the corner that you suspect may be a mafia front. They made damn good cheeseburgers though.

Your mind had then of course wondered to the possibility of being caught up in a police raid and if ‘wanting to support local business’ be a good enough excuse to get you off the hook.

It’s how you missed the pint sized ambush lying in wait for you.

Madelyn had been planted outside your door in electric pink spandex and light up sneakers. She’d spotted you coming out of the lift and attached herself onto you before you could make a proper run for it.

Since then you’d been stuck holding her instead of the greasy end of a heart attack masquerading as a sandwich. Fat tears continue to wet the collar of the fleece outer coat you’d nabbed at a bargain sale.

“How long has she been like this?” Kyle asks with a raised brow.

Ignoring him, you do your best to wrestle Madelyn’s stiff form back enough to meet her eyes.

The younger girl’s face is red and splotchy, snot and mascara darkened tears stain her usually fair skin. Her mousy brown hair could use a wash as well but you aren’t unkind enough to point it out. Even though she did shag your husband to be, it was clear the girl was torturing herself with guilt.

It is a bit unfair that the smudged makeup does nothing to detract from her beauty, much to your petty disdain.

She’d make gorgeous babies with Hugo…

The thought makes you scowl. It was time to make a retreat.

“Madelyn, I’d really like to get into my flat. I don’t want to speak to you to be honest and I need you to let me go.”

More helpless wailing comes out of the younger woman.

“P-Please Siggy, I just need you to know I never meant for this to happen! Hugo and I tried to keep away from each other and I don't want you to hate me or the b-baby!” By the end she’s blubbering herself into hyperventilation.

From the corner of your eyes you can make out the door of your neighbor adjacent to you crack open. Whipping your neck to get a look at the nosy pissant gets the older woman to slam the door closed with a fearful squeak.

This had gone on too long.

Forcibly you use your hip and extra weight to maneuver the hysterical woman from your person. You hold her flailing arms to prevent her from launching herself back to your front. When she whines you’ve finally reached your breaking point.

“For fucks sake, you’re making a bloody scene!” You bark out, “I don’t care about Hugo!”

Madelyn flinches.

“But you care that we’re having a baby, right?”

It’s only when Madelyn lets out a whine of pain that you notice you’d been holding her thin wrists in a vice-like grip.

A forgotten Kyle chooses that moment to slink closer, his hands cup Madelyn’s shoulder carefully, despite your death glare.

“Maddy, darling, why don’t you let go for me.”

The brunette woman startles having finally noticed his presence in the vicinity.

“Oh, Kyle! I didn’t know you were here!” It’s insulting how quickly she wriggles from your hold to catapult herself into Kyle’s waiting arms.

With disgust you watch Kyle pat the shorter woman’s hair much like one would do a pet. Something about watching him with her makes your hackles rise farther.

“Why don’t you come in and calm down, hm? I’ll make you that tea you like and we can watch something.” Kyle makes a humming noise meant to soothe. It pisses you off but seems to work like a charm.

Madelyn’s sniffles subside dramatically and she rubs her hand across her button nose.

“Yes, that does sound lovely, but I need to talk to Siggy...”

You flinch as the two turn towards you once more. Kyle must see the cornered look in your eyes because he rubs his hands along Madelyn’s shoulders and whispers something in her ear.

Madelyn nods and enters Kyle’s flat without any further hesitation.

It’s like the nearly thirty minutes of being held hostage outside your own home means nothing against his soft words.

God, you hate this man with every fiber of your being.

With a scowl you rummage through your bag for your house keys. Why did you have so many gum wrappers inside? You really need to clean your bag out.

It’s not until you hear a throat clear that you realize Kyle still watches you from the threshold of his home.

“What?” Your tone makes a muscle in his cheek twitch. You hate to say it but it satisfies you to know at least you have some effect on him.

“Are you alright, love?”

That causes you to abandon your search. You squint at his open expression and the genuine concern you see there. It’s unexpected and makes you a bit uncomfortable. How pathetic did you look that even your enemies pity you?

“I’m fine. Not like you actually care anyways.”

The last part was said in a mumble but Kyle’s sharp ears catch it.

“Oy, what is that supposed to mean?” He steps closer to you crowding your space.

Your senses are bombarded by the heady scent of the bergamot and cedar wood notes in his cologne. Coupled with the tangy smell of his natural musk, your brain does that thing where it shuts off and reboots itself.

“Siggy.” Kyle reaches out to touch your arm sending an electric current between you two that causes you to jolt back. He frowns, stepping closer, crowding you before you wield your bag in front of you like a shield and sword.

“Garrick, I really, really don’t want to talk right now.”

“Sig-”

“No, no, no! I don’t want to hear it! I’ve had a shite day and the cause of it is currently waiting for tea and cakes in your flat! I’m the one that deserves bloody tea and cakes for fucks sake!”

Enraged, you shove your hand through your bag and come in contact with the puff ball attached to your keys.

You’re frantically unlocking your door and shoving inside your home, refusing to give the universe another moment to make a mess of your ruined day.

You look at Kyle as he stands in utter confusion and give him the dirtiest look in your arsenal.

“Cheers, I hope you enjoy your sweets with Madelyn but you can piss right off, Kyle!”

You slam the door with finality.

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#the five year plan #I promise there's a point to the cakes conundrum!#baby face #kyle gaz garrick #wraith writes #kyle garrick x black reader #kyle garrick x reader

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darklydeliciousdesires · 8 months

Text

Wet Sheets - A John Shelby/Reader One Shot Story.

Because we all love a bit of smutty John of a Monday morning. Yes, we do!

Words - 1,079

Warnings - Smut below the cut, minors DNI!

He wasn’t very adept at it, back when you first met him. You wouldn’t exactly say lousy, but he needed a little tutelage. Of course, John being John, he didn’t take it all too well to begin with, either.

“What the bloody hell d’you mean? Ain’t had any complaints before. I find everything I’ve gotta find down there alright, don’t I?”

Oh yes. With his fingers, he needed absolutely no guidance. Push in, hook over, rake, and there he’d take you right on a clear trajectory to the stars. His tongue, though? Hm.

“What you’re seeking with your tongue, John... it’s about half an inch from where you think it is.”

He’d huffed. He’d pulled his undershirt and trousers on, muttering about going for a smoke. You’d wondered if he was coming back at all after he’d been gone for fifteen minutes, but he did eventually return, smelling of tobacco and whiskey, pulling himself out of his clothes. His face had been set in steely determination.

“Right. Fucking get your legs open and show me.”

You did, showing him exactly where and how to use his tongue against you, and goodness, how you reaped the rewards of him deciding to stuff his pride down, be a good boy and listen. Now, whenever John has his mouth between your legs, you are reluctant to let him surface. Now, he has your pouring for him like warm honey without fail. Every single time.

“Fucking hell,” he mumbles, his fingers taking over as he pauses from beating the tip of his tongue rapidly over your clit. “I need gills!”

You arch an eyebrow, snorting softly with laughter. “Are you seriously complaining?”

“Nah, bab. Ain’t complaining at all, just saying, like. Got a right fucking little sex puddle on me sheets already, you have.” His words are delivered with much triumph, pressing his tongue against the wet of you, flat, firm heat dragging over your bud again and again. Your hips judder, John smiling at your reactions, long licks continuing as his eyes close and his buries his mouth against you.

His lips bathe your clit in a soft suck, kissing it, moaning around you, hands gripped tight upon your thighs as your soft cries fill the space. Each lick gilds you golden, pleasure thrumming through you, the swell of it rolling tighter the faster his tongue begins to move. Your thighs lock tight against his head, wailing as it builds, the dawn of your undoing spilling over his horizon as the glimmers burst forth.

Yet, he doesn’t cease.

“John... I... oh!” You whimper, shaking from oversensitivity, hands fisting the sheets. “But I already...”

He snorts softly. “I know, but just cos’ you came, it don’t mean I’m done. I ain’t no Johnny fuckin’ half a job, sweetheart.”

His teeth gently graze your bud, and it sends sparks glimmering through you, tongue rolling over you again firmly, heat misting your spine. His licks are gently placed to begin with, little flickers chased to skittered heat once more, the hot wrap of pillowy heat from his lips encircling your clit, your body shivering in response.

He sucks a fever at you, tongue circling, hands gliding over your thighs, your cunt trickling onto his tongue as he opens his mouth to drag a firm lick through your folds. The fever of it rushes over you, winds tight, held in the orbit of his control as moonbeams shine through the darkest depths of you once more, coming apart again quickly.

Those little pin pricks of ecstasy are still tingling as he kisses his way back up your body, sating you with the thick intrusion of his cock, his mouth landing upon yours as he begins to fuck you slowly into the little puddle his tongue created.

“Like this big, hard cock, don’t ya, love?”

“Mmm,” you groan, your nails trailing the shortly shaven sides of his head. “You know I do.”

He gives you a few more long thrusts a little punt of his hips daggering him deep each time he pushes forth, head dipping to lay kisses over your clavicles. “Turn over, bab. I wanna watch your arse bounce as I fuck ya.”

He slips out, lust blown eyes watching as you arrange yourself accordingly to his wishes, John giving you a little spank on the bum before returning himself to you with a lust-soaked groan. Anticipation creeps over your muscles, feeling him push against you, the stretch of him sending tingles through your walls. He splits you wide, fills you deep, his hands gripping your waist as he fills and empties you with long, even strokes, and god, if you could see the smile on his face at how good you feel.

It rolls through you like a storm, your gangster lover not remaining contained for long before he’s pounding into you savagely, his abs trembling as his hands fist tight in your hair, pulling your head back. Mutual moans fill the room with the sexiest harmony of sin, your walls fluttering around him, heat creeping up through him like a vine ascending, taking hold of his senses in a swirling tempest.

White hot pleasure glints through you, tumbling down your spine like a shooting star, John reaching beneath you to rub circles at your clit as his cock punches you deep, splits you wide, remakes you around him. He grits, a groan like tumbling boulders echoing through his chest as he fucks a storm of nirvana through your body, your hips pushing back against him as you cry out.

Your voice breaks on his name, your waves flooding his shore as you come with a feral wail, his body rapidly driving against you until his cock jerks and he’s joining you, tight bliss come undone, his head resting upon your back.

“Fucking hell,” he pants, laying soft kisses against your spine, “that’s proper done me in, that has.”

You giggle softly, feeling him slide from you, pulling your spent body to rest against his in the messy tangle of bed linen. “Not so much that you won’t be able to do it all over again a bit later though, I hope?”

His grin is wide and devilish. “Like I said, bab. I ain’t no Johnny half a job.

Some of his god-given talents truly required no further instruction. The way he fucks you remains as beyond perfect as it ever was, ensuring the sheets beneath you never stay bone dry once he's done.

#john shelby fanfiction #john shelby smut #peaky blinders fanfiction #peaky blinders smut #john shelby x reader #john shelby x you #john shelby fanfic #john shelby fic #peaky blinders fanfic #peaky blinders fic

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minniesmutt · 1 month

Note

Oooh okay congrats btw and I have TWO b/c I can't make up my mind and you can just pick one PLEASE!!

1. Wolf!Chan X human!reader

'Oh no not until you beg'

OR...

1. Siren!Hyunjin X human!reader

'You look good enough to eat'

Because get it??? He's a siren haha

Hope these are good! Thank you 🙏

☾ ━━━ PAIRING: HYUNJIN X READER ☾ ━━━ PROMPT: 25 “You look just about good enough to eat.” ☾ ━━━ CONTENT: SIREN!HYUNJIN, HUMAN!READER, FEAR OF THE OCEAN, ORAL (F. REC), PORN W/O PLOT, FINGERING, IMPLIED MORE ROUNDS ☾ ━━━ WC: 0.5K ☾ ━━━ 18+ work!! minors and ageless/blank blogs DNI! you will be blocked, put an indicator on your blog somewhere that you are 18+ before interacting with this work/blog

The ocean was dangerous; heavily unexplored and no one knew what lurked below. But if the creatures below wanted to be seen, they’d show.

“You’re back,” Hyunjin smiled as he swam from the ocean entrance to the enclosed cove.

“I promised I would be,” Y/n smiled as she dropped her bag down and sat on the ledge, dipping her feet in the water as the siren swam closer.

“Going to actually get in the water with me today?” Hyunjin asked

“I’m not going out in the ocean,” Y/n told him

“We won’t. Just float in here,” Hyunjin offered

“Alright,” Y/n agreed, standing up and taking off her shorts and top, leaving her in the swimsuit she wore underneath.

Hyunjin helped her into the water, instantly pulling her close to him to lap her afloat easier. He’d never deny his attraction to the human, but that didn’t mean he’d say it to her either. He knew their relationship could never work. Two different worlds and they were sneaking around in coves. But having her this close and the way she looked in the swimsuit was making him question all of it.

“Hyunjin?” Y/n asked

“Hm?” He hummed

“What are you thinking about?” She asked, brushing back his wet hair

“Thinking how you look just about good enough to eat.”

“Coming from a siren, that’s a little scary.”

“Not like that.”

Even in the cold water, Y/n felt like her body was on fire. Hyunjin just weirdly confessed to her and all she could do was kiss him. The siren wrapped her legs around his hips and pushed them up against the rocky wall of the cave. “Hyunjin,” Y/n moaned

“Need you,” Hyunjin said, practically tearing the fabric off her before disappearing underwater. Y/n looked down, seeing the black hair floating as he moved her legs over his shoulders.

Y/n barely managed to grab hold of the rocks behind her when she felt his plump lips she spent hours staring at wrap around her clit. A gasp left her as he sucked on the bud, his nails digging into the tops of her thighs to keep her close to him.

She felt a twinge of guilt that she might be covering his gills but the way his tongue danced with her clit made her forget quickly. She let her head fall back against the rocky wall. Her moans echoing off the walls as Hyunjin pushed tw webbed fingers into her. She managed to reach underwater and grab a handful of his hair.

She couldn’t hear him moan but she could definetly feel the sound vibrating her clit. His lips and tongue working the small bundle of nerves all while his fingers brushed up against her walls. She didn’t know how much longer she was going to last between his lips and fingers.

Her body felt hot as her back arched off the wall of the cave and the knot she barely felt forming snapped. Cumming on the siren’s fingers and feeling his tongue on her entrance too. If it wasn’t for Hyunjin holding her up she would sink into the water. He came up from the water and wrapped his arms around her waist to keep her steady.

“Taste better than I thought,” he teased

“Think you’re tongue works better than a siren song,” Y/n told him, arms wrapping around his shoulders

“Let’s get you on land, maybe get to our main course.”

☾ ━━━━━━ M.LIST TIP JAR WANNA JOIN MY TAGLIST?

☾ ━━━ please support writers by reblogging and/or leaving feedback

☾ ━━━ 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐒: @puckmaidens @onlyhyunjin @minh0scat @auroratiseee @oddracha

@hanniemylovelyquokka @amarecerasus @highkeyinlovewithhanjisung @bookswillfindyouaway @skz-supernovaa

@fun-fanfics @trixiekaulitz @oddracha @trickskz @yeetmehome

@sailorkoss @h0rnyp0t @lunearta

#☾━━━━ [𝐊𝐀𝐑𝐌𝐀 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐒]#stray kids #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #stray kids x reader smut #skz smut #skz x reader smut #skz #stray kids smut #hyunjin x reader smut #hyunjin x reader #hyunjin smut #hwang hyunjin x reader #hwang hyunjin x reader smut #hwang hyunjin smut #☾━━━━ [karma's 1k event]

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bethanythebogwitch · 1 year

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It's big, it's strong, its scaly, it's this week's Wet Beast Wednesday topic! An arapaima, also known as a pirarucu or paiche, is any of four species of fish in the genus Arapaima in the order of bony-tongued fish. There is som ongoing debate about the classification of the species, so to keep thing simple, I'm going to use the most common species names of Arapaima gigas (the type species and most well known, and the one with the most confusion about its classification), Arapaima agassizii, Arapaima leptosoma, and Arapaima mapae. Because A. gigas is the most well-studied of the species, unless I say otherwise you can assume everything I say in this post applies to it.

(image: an arapaima)

Arapaimas are bony fish that retain several primitive traits, causing them to sometimes be identified as "living fossils". They are most notable for their size, with A. gigas being a contender for the largest freshwater fish in the world. The maximum recorded size for one was 3.7 meters (10 ft) and 200 kg (400 lbs), but most get to around 2 meters (6.6 ft) long and 200 kg (440 lbs). That average length is decreasing as overfishing of the largest individuals is resulting in a selective pressure for smaller sizes. In addition to their size, they are extremely strong and can move fast if needed. Arapaima are fully capable of leaping out of the water if disturbed or they feel their current pond in unsuitable. Because of their strength, specimens in captivity must be handled with care as they can easy break bones if they slap someone. They live in rivers and lakes in South America, where they are often the top predators.

(image: several anglers with an arapaima)

Arapaimas are obligate air-breathers and will drown if they can't get to the surface to breathe. This is accomplished with a specialized swim bladder. The swim bladder is filled with highly vascularized tissue, letting it act like a lung. This pseudo-lung opens into the mouth using a modified gill arch known as the labyrinth organ. Arapaima gills are too small to sustain them, but they can supplement their oxygen intake with the gills. Juveniles are born exclusively using their gills and transition into air-breathers shortly after hatching. Arapaimas can survive up to a full day out of the water. They typically surface to gulp in air every 15-20 minutes. Breathing makes a loud gulping sound that anglers use to target them.

(image: an arapaima at the surface)

Because of their ability to breathe air, arapaimas are top predators in low-oxygen environments. Non-air breathing fish are forced to slow down in water with low levels of dissolved oxygen as they can't get enough oxygen through their gills. Since Arapaimas breathe air, they can easily chase down lethargic smaller fish. They are especially potent predators during the low season, when water levels lower. A combination of rotting vegetation reducing oxygen levels and ponds getting cut off from rivers and losing a supply of oxygen lets the arapaima reign supreme. Arapaimas are primarily predators that feed on smaller fish, though they will hunt other types of animals and eat fruits and seeds. Even land animals aren't safe as arapaimas have been known to launch themselves out of the water to catch animals near the shore. A combination of sharp teeth and their bony tongues are used to debilitate prey.

(image: an arapaima with its mouth open)

Not content with powerleveling their attack stat, arapaimas also have excellent defense. Their scales have been compared to bullet proof vests. Each has a hard, mineralized outer layer over multiple layers of collagen fibers. These layers are all oriented at an angle to each other to provide extra strength. This orientation of layers is called a Bouligand-type arrangement and is similar to how plywood is assembled. The harder outer layers and flexible inner layers work together to allow for both strength and flexibility. These scales help provide protection form large predators such as caiman and small threats like biting piranha. They also like provide protection from other arapaima, as the fish are aggressive and will fight each other.

(image: a diagram showing the composition of arapaima scales. source)

You probably wouldn't expect a swimming tank of an animal to be a good parent, but you'd be wrong. Arapaimas work together in mated pairs to build nests for their eggs, then cooperate to guard the nest. Once the eggs hatch, the male will practice mouth brooding, keeping his young safe in his mouth. The female will also help by patrolling the area around the male to ward off predators. They secrete pheromones from their heads to ensure the young don't swim too far away. Eggs are laid either in in the low season or as water levels are starting to rise, ensuring that the young become independent during the high season.

(Image: baby arapaimas)

Arapaima are classified as "data deficient" by the IUCN. This means there isn't enough data to properly assess their conservation needs. They are known to be threatened by overfishing. Arapaima make up a large part of the diet of many South American populations. Habitat loss and pollution are also believed to threaten them. They have been introduced to many areas out of their native range and are an invasive species in placed like Florida, Malaysia, and India.

Does anyone else remember these cards? (image: the arapaima card from Weird n' Wild Creatures)

#wet beast wednesday #fishblr #fish #biology #zoology #ecology #animals #aquatic biology #animal facts #absolute unit #arapaima #pirarucu #paiche

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miasmaghoul · 4 months

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Rain and Mountain working in the greenhouse when it starts to sprinkle. It's a sunshower, all fat springtime raindrops that splash against the glass and catch Rain's attention immediately, his ears and tail twitching as the pitter patter of those droplets picks up.

Mountain doesn't have time to blink before he finds himself being dragged by the apron towards the door. Rain's gills flutter as he shoves his way outside, shucking his own apron and sucking down a deep lungful of rich, damp air with a pleased trill. Mountain stumbles out behind him, tripping over his own feet and Rain's eagerness, huddling under the vestibule while the water ghoul strolls out into the deluge. It's gotten heavier, the sort of quick storm that will undoubtedly be done in 20 minutes and leave the ground dry in an hour, but for now?

For now, Mountain smiles as he watches Rain bask in his namesake. Staring up at the sky with his arms stretched over his head and his spine curved in an arch that makes Mountain's back hurt and yet is clearly pleasant for the other ghoul. Mountain watches those heavy drops soak his shirt, watches the thin cotton of the pale blue tee start to go dark and cling to his skin.

It takes nothing for Mountain to imagine those droplets sliding down his bare chest instead, tracing winding paths over the light muscling of his belly and catching in his happy trail. It's a memory from this morning, of a wonderfully decadent shared shower that had made them late to breakfast. He watches Rain's curls soak through, twisting tighter and sticking to his forehead and pointed ears. Mountain recalls working conditioner through those strands while Rain purred and purred, the pair of them pressed back to chest in a cloak of herbal steam. It all brings a warmth to his chest, one that only grows when the water ghoul turns to him.

Rain's smiling in the way he only does at times like this, soft and genuine in a way that makes his ocean eyes sparkle. He holds out an elegant arm in seeming invitation and Mountain tilts his head.

"Dance with me."

It isn't a question, and Mountain huffs out a laugh. Shakes his head even as he steps out into the downpour, quick to take Rain's offered hand and get an arm around his waist. To settle a large palm on his lower back and pull the smaller ghoul in close, relishing the feel of warm skin through cool fabric. Rain looks up at him with crinkled eyes and a fanged smile, and Mountain truly doesn't understand how anything can be so beautiful.

And so they dance, until they're soaked to the bone and muddy to their ankles, and when they kiss Mountain thinks it tastes like springtime.

#miasma's work #the band ghost ficlets #mountain ghoul #rain ghoul #mountrain #mountain x rain #mountain/rain #this is the first thing ive written in over a month woah #idk ive been Thinking of them lately

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hanasnx · 9 months

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arm kink: revisited

MINORS DNI 18+ NOTES: for @justadmiringanakin WARNINGS: f!reader | arm kink | size difference | choking | squirt & hump mention.

“Anakin?” you call, craning your neck over equipment to spot MODERN!ANAKIN SKYWALKER as he works through his set of pull-ups. You swallow, coming to a stop a couple feet away from him. Ashamedly, you’re in awe. With every jut of his chin over the bar, his biceps swell with the effort of lifting himself. Ankles crossed neatly behind him in perfect stance, there’s not a muscle of his out of place. All of it on display while he wears a black side slit shirt. Precise, and well-taught, he releases grunts through his teeth with each crest, controlling his breathing to the second to maximize his energy. That concentrated crease in his brows is intimidating, set features, pursed lips that expel a shot of air, eyes that unwaveringly focus on his task.

You don’t know how many of these things he’s done, but there’s a sheen of sweat that glistens on his skin in such a delectable way you just wanna lick him clean. Curly hair weighed down from moisture, beads at his forehead, you feel faint.

Tendons emphasize their paths through his arms, swollen biceps thick and veined pulse as he moves. Briefly you fantasize what it’d be like wrapped around your neck, and the fantasy furthers the longer you watch how his muscle redistributed his weight on his limbs. His brutish hands that connect to his hefty wrists dwarf the bar they’re wrapped on. His sides, exposed by the cut of his top, ripple with motion, like a bag of fucking ropes. You can see a flash of his abs every so often, but the defined lines of his serratus catch your eye as they shift under his skin. They remind you of the cut of a shark’s gills.

You barely register he’s stopped while your mind runs away with you. He drops to the floor, wipes his face with a towel, and chugs water all while you stand practically comatose. If you hadn’t been, you would’ve drooled over the way his larynx bobbed from every gulp. With how horny you are now, you could’ve sexualized that as well, conjuring a plan to sit on his neck to hump his Adam’s apple and choke him with your thighs.

“Angel?” his affectionate nickname for you snaps you out of it, jumping in place as you recognize the towering figure looming over you. Failing to explain yourself, you trip over your silent words, re-forming your gaping mouth until he quiets you indefinitely. “Let’s go home.”

By home he means the shower, he means bed, he means cunt. Forced to swipe at your clit with your own hand while he’s rolling his hips into you, showcasing every muscle that works so hard for you. He peacocks for you, deliberately this time, and you would’ve been soaked even without his fat cock shoving its way into you. Massive hands rest on your legs to keep your spread while he’s on his knees, arching his spine to push his cock into your propped-up pussy. “Getting fucking tired of your staring, you know that?” he breathes, hypocritical considering his most obvious staring problem, and his most obvious enjoyment of your voyeurism. He likes showing off. As if to scold him for it, you squirm and try to escape him, weakly crawling back on your hands only for him to yank you back easy. “Gimme that cunt, baby, don’t run away.” You’d disobeyed him taking your fingers off your clit, so he keeps his grip on your hips to draw you into his thrusts which makes his already bruising and long cock fit that much deeper into your hole. Practically kisses your cervix, jerking your entire body.

“I can’t take it, Ani! Can’t take it!” you insist, thrashing and clawing at the sheets.

“Well, if you listened to me—“ he begins, speaking while he rearranges you harshly, manhandling you onto your stomach and peeling your pelvis off the mattress to meet his. He muscles his dick back in, feeding it right to your puffy folds. You cry out, but he doesn’t even afford you that dignity. He curls over you, making you feel small with his hot skin against yours, enveloping you. An arm winds around your neck, tucking your larynx into the crook of his elbow. When he gets a good grasp, he ruts into you, and you’re slick as fuck. “Now get your fucking hand back on that clit.” he spits into your ear, his swollen bicep pushing into the side of your neck. Eager to please him again, you do as he says, clumsy fingers massaging your bud. “Atta’girl.” You breathe hard through your open mouth, pulling in air as his arm keeps you right where he wants you, using it to pin you into taking whatever he gives you until you squirt all over him from just his cock.

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fishyfishyfishtimes · 3 months

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Daily fish fact #792

Palauan primitive cave eel!

This eel species was discovered in a single cave in a single reef off the coast of Palau in 2009. This single species is a sister group to all other extant eels, having diverged from all others 200 million years ago! It retains several primitive features like a retained pseudobranch (the very first reduced gill arch), certain jaw bones, distinct caudal fin rays and toothed gill rakers, some features being even more primitive than those found in eel fossils from the Cretaceous!

#fish #fish facts #fishfact #fishblr #marine biology #marine animals #marine life #sea animals #sea creatures #sea life #zoology #biology #eel #eels #palauan primitive cave eel

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dinogoofymutated · 5 months

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Enemies to lovers! Quicksilver/GN!Reader

So no one requested this but I can't get it out of my head so it's going here!! I absolutely love quicksilver in the comics and the animated shows but most of his content is from the movies. I'm not complaining! But I wanted to branch that out a bit lol. I guess you can imagine almost any Pietro, but I was picturing his personality from Wolverine and the X-men. Haven't seen it in a while so forgive me if this is OOC.

This is set pre-dead professor. I might have also gotten a little carried away with this one, lol, and there will be a part 2! Fights and stuff are kept super vague for my mental health sorry if it's shitty.

-ps- someone let me know if Pietro's super speed counts for swimming too??

TWS: Tlasophobia (possibly?) Almost drowning. Dehydration, wounds.

You weren't sure if you considered Quicksilver an enemy, a rival, or an arch-nemesis, but the one thing you did know was that Pietro Maximoff was the most annoying motherfucker on the planet. Seriously! As part of the X-men, he seemed to always be in your way in every major fight.

What didn't help was that you were a speedster in your own right- well, not on land that is. The same gene that blessed others with powers beyond comprehension turned you into... a fish? Sure, you were fine on land, able to blend in with regular humans, but the moment you hit the water you were completely different. Gills, fins, the works. And you were fast. Really fucking fast.

Now when you first met Pietro while on a mission, he was being a snarky bastard. Can't catch me this, too slow that, ha! The guy may be able to run on water, but he's clumsy when he's in it. You're sure you have his face memorized from the time you caught up with him beneath the waves, tugging on his ankle and pulling him into the sea. His eyes practically bulged out of his head when realized what had happened. Of course, you're sure his face was even funnier when he watched you speed off into the depths, having neutralized him for the moment.

Every fight after that turned into a contest. Who can beat who where, Who stranded the other first, easily taking them out of the battle quickly and efficiently. Things like that. The professor had to remind you sometimes that the goal is to protect others, protect humanity, not quarrel with Quicksilver. You knew that, of course. You're thankful for the professor and what he's trying to do- but every time you saw Pietro's stupid arrogant smile you just got so- aggravated!

That being said, just because he aggravated you, didn't mean you wanted him dead. In fact, fate would keep pulling the two of you together in the least expected ways.

First, it was you, saving him from a sinking ship. He had slipped and managed to knock himself out during the fight, you having found him while trying to ensure everyone was off the boat. You were conflicted at first, knowing he was your enemy but not wanting to leave him to drown. In the end, you had grabbed him. The problem was that he wasn't breathing when you made it to the shore.

Some aggressive CPR and a few broken ribs later, he was coughing up water from his lungs. You, surprisingly, were at his side, holding him steady. Pietro was confused at first, letting you help him sit up as he coughed his lungs out, but his expression completely changes when he looks up and realises who's been holding him up. He makes an incredulous face at first, then rising to his feet in a split second, although not without swaying. He eyed you suspiciously as you stood to face him.

"You shouldn't be moving so fast straight away. I'm sure I broke a few ribs trying to get you back." You said. He sets a hand on his side wincing as he Most likely prods at a few bruises.

"Why did you...?" He can't seem to finish the scentace, and you simply shrug. You couldn't leave him there. As annoying as he was, you wouldn't wish a death by drowning on anyone. You're pretty sure you'd have saved him in any other circumstances as well, but you choose not to think about that right now. His face of confusion morphs into slight seriousness, and when he looks back to the ocean to see the Brotherhood is long gone he stands for a moment. You can almost see the gears whirring in his head, and reach out to take his arm.

"Look, I get that you recover fast and all, but you should really take it easy-" Before you finish your scentace, you've been shoved back into the sand dune. Pietro is standing further away from you than before, arms crossed as the sand settles from his quick movement. You stare at him in shock.

"Your loss." He says, sticking his tongue out before speeding off and across the water, kicking up sand in your face as he does so. UGH! Even when you go out of your way to be nice, He's a dick!

Despite him being a straight up asshole the last time you saw him, it's safe to say something between you has changed. You couldn't quite place it, but you could see it in the way you would fight. What would have been brutal punches shifted to major inconveniences, like handcuffing you to a railing and things like that. Incapacitating you without dragging you further into the fight. In fact, he hadn't even snatched you up to run and drop you off hours away from the fight for a while. Beforehand, he loved to strand you somewhere land-locked, forcing you to wait until the X-men came to pick you up. Sometimes it would take days for them to get to you, so you were almost always on guard, staying close to or in the water so he couldn't catch you.

You had gotten used to the new Quicksilver, and what used to be a rock-solid defence and begun to crumble. That was your mistake. The next time you saw Pietro, there most definitely a shift in the air. This fight was going to be brutal, but you and the team had prepared for it. You thought you had anyway. But with your friends getting injured, the fight dragging on, taking a turn for the worse, you were genuinely beginning to fear for everyone's lives.

It wasn't long after that relvation that your head was spinning, and you were being plopped down on a gritty, sandy surface.

"Sorry babe, you'll thank me later!" You clench your jaw at the sound of his voice, catching the sight of sandy dunes as you tried to turn around to rip into the man.

"Pietro!-" Your venomous words were cut off as a blur of silver rushes off, kicking up a gust of wind and leaving you stranded. Worse than stranded, you would say. Pietro had left you in a desert. A bright, dry, hot ass desert. And it was not going well for you.

Not only did you have no clue where you were going, but you were beginning to realize that you were in a really bad position. It was like every drop of moisture was being sucked out of your body. Your mouth felt dry and cottony, exhaustion setting in a little too easily. You were dizzy, dehydrated, and hopelessly lost. The sun had no mercy for you. Eventually, you have to lie down, doing your best to stay awake and not fall asleep, worrying about the worst, but eventually your drooping eyes win over your will to remain awake.

The sun is starting to set when you wake up, throat dry as a bone, both sickly and exhausted. You can hear the sound of something approaching, and do your best to sit up on your knees, doubling over for a moment before forcing your body to move. A pair of legs step right in front of you as you do.

"Wow, You look terrible." Quicksilver says, and if you didn't know any better, you would almost say he looks concerned. You don't have the energy to roll your eyes or speak to him at the moment, stars flickering in your eyes as you start to sway. You start to teeter, before you're snatched off the desert sand, Pietro having caught you and scooped you up into his arms.

"Worse than terrible, actually." He mumbles this time. His concern is clear now, face close enough to your own for you to properly see him. You scoff, or at least attempt to.

"You... left an aquatic mutant... in the middle of the desert. What were you expecting?" You say, having to pace yourself. You're fully leaning your head against his shoulder now, not having the energy to keep your head up anymore. You can feel him suck in a breath and tense up as you begin to go limp against him. His hold tightens up on you before he takes off running.

You've always been accustomed to extreme speeds, at least mostly, but the combination of how ill you feel and his sudden stop makes you want to puke. You can't bear to open your eyes at the moment, choosing instead to bury your face in Quicksilver's shoulder. You're sure he's taken you to some random place to leave you to die, but he sets you down on something soft and cushioned.

"...Where-?"

"You're in the mansion." He says quickly, cutting you off. You stare at him in disbelief as he stands back up, and you realise he's taken you to the medbay. You and Pietro make eyecontact for a moment, both wondering what to say. Eventually, you watch as pietro moves across the room to purposely set off the alarm, which you know for a fact he knew how to avoid. He turns back to you, winking as he readies himself to speed off again.

"See you soon, slowpoke." He says. You make a face at him and he laughs. In a blink, he's gone, just as the doors bust open, Beast running in frantically, with the professor rolling close behind him.

You cant quite figure out this man. Normally, he'd just leave you to fend for yourself. He's never come back to get you before. Why would he do it then? At first you were sure he put you out in the desert as a deliberate attempt to leave you for dead, but now? He seemed genuinely concerned for you, and you're not sure how to feel about that.

In the end, only Pietro knew why he came back. Or did he? Maybe he was just as confused and conflicted as you were.

#x men 97 #x men #x men comics #x men 97 x reader #x men headcannons #quicksilver #quicksilver x reader #pietro maximoff #pietro maximov #pietro maximoff x reader #quicksilver headcannons #x men headcanons #wolverine and the x men

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the-bad-boys · 2 years

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hi there hello

welcome to erm. my blog. hi. my name is Ren! you can also call me Scar if you need to differentiate between another person. he/they/it :]

do YOU like limited life? so do i, follow me

this blog is centered around the Bad Boys. i am their #1 fan. if you wanna see Bad Boys stuff every day…well, that’s what I'm here for!

i like to rp sometimes...if you're interested in some MCYT rp or something dm me :D

PFP by wasyago, banner by virtual-paint !!!!

tags under cut [yes they are silly and weird on purpose!! some are references, maybe send an ask if you think you've figured one out?]

BASIC TAGS

#the bad boy rambles - random posts

#the opposite side of us - stuff about the mean gills

#sure life may be limited but it's all the same - stuff about Limited Life

#or i could go with double trouble - stuff about Double Life

#it's all just true to the name - stuff about Hermitcraft

#oh but we know it's just a big circle - stuff about Empires SMP

#can you swear to me that it'll be no good? - stuff about Witchcraft SMP

#do you remember back there? all the memories we shared? - stuff about the Evolution SMP

#they're watching and listening. they're in your walls; can you hear them whispering? - Watchers Lore

#vdhau !! - @/kiwinatorwaffles’ Hermitcraft AU YAY!

#what? it's otherworldly! - stuff outside of MCYT

#the moving pictures stream across the screen - videos

#tsk tsk tsk! they go; questioning your every move - asks i get

#saved for next time !! - important posts

#reblogs - er. reblogs

MUTUAL TAGS

#me n' you!!! - general posts from mutuals/that include mutuals

#arch nemesis tag!

#pinned #the bad boy rambles #reblogs #vdhau !!#or I could go with double trouble [double life]#the moving pictures stream across the screen [videos]#saved for next time !! [saved]#arch nemesis tag! [@mean-gills]#the opposite side of us [mean gills]#it's all just true to the name [hermitcraft]#sure life may be limited but it's all the same [limited life]#what? it's otherworldly! [not MCYT]#oh but we know it's just a big circle [empires]#can you swear to me that it'll be no good? [witchcraft smp]#do you remember back there? all those memories we shared? [evo]#they're watching and listening. they're in your walls; can you hear them whispering? [watchers lore]#tsk tsk tsk! they go; questioning your every move [asks]#me n' you!!! [mutual posts]

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coffeeghoulie · 1 month

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“God, you always make me blush so damn much.” And uhhhhhh gimme rain and mountain ? (:

I need to write more mount/rain. they're so good.

divider by @ghuleh-recs <3

The junebugs sing, a sharp steady drone cutting through the laketide lapping at the pebble beach. Mountain sits at the end of the dock, pants cuffed up his past his knees, boots and socks set on the sunworn wood next to him. The water is cool and refreshing against his feet, sore after a long day's work in the gardens and greenhouses.

He's content in the calm, his element calling to him, but he knows he's not alone. Mountain stares out over the lake, the surface calm and glassy-still. His eyes lock onto a dark shape under the water, moving elegantly a dozen yards out, getting closer.

If he were anything else, Mountain would be worried. Even so, he feels the tickle of instinctive fear in the back of his brain. He ignores it, dragging his feet through the water, ripples radiating out from it.

He knows better.

Mountain leans forward as the dark shape gets closer, and closer, and closer, and he can't hide the way the smile grows on his face. He most certainly doesn't yelp when a hand shoots up from the water and grabs his ankle. It's cold against his sunwarm skin.

A ghoul follows the hand, a splash rippling out from where he surfaces. Even soaking wet and hair hanging in dark, dripping rivulets around his face, Rain is the most beautiful thing Mountain's ever had the privilege of laying eyes on. Unglamoured, cerulean skin, spattered with little silver freckles across shoulders and cheekbones and the bridge of his Roman nose. His finned ears and gills flare teal, fluttering as the air hits them, and dark sapphire eyes shine in the sunlight.

"Why, hello there, handsome," Rain croons, thumb smoothing in an arch over the dimple on the inside of Mountain's ankle. He hauls himself up until he settles half out of the water between Mountain's legs. "I didn't know I had an audience."

Mountain's lips quirk up in a playful smirk. "Can you blame me?"

Rain cocks his head, leaning his wet hair against the inside of Mountain's thigh. "Not at all," he says, serrated teeth flashing. Mountain can feel the magick dripping from his voice, siren's song tugging at the animal part of his brain.

If he were a human man, he would have dove into the water the moment Rain opened his mouth. As it stands, Mountain's still considering it.

He'd be happy to admit it wouldn't take any of Rain's magick to convince him.

Rain rubs his cheek against the rough denim inseam, eyes wide and almost innocent. "The water's very nice today, sunflower."

Mountain nods, still smiling. "I know," he says, raking the foot Rain isn't grabbing through the water and watching the ripples it makes. "Very nice indeed."

The water ghoul rolls his eyes, but he's still smiling up at him. He turns to press a kiss to the inside of his thigh, putting his finned ear directly in Mountain's line of sight.

He smiles fondly, gently running a finger along the arches of his ear, laughing kindly as it flicks against Rain's head. The noise it draws from him is a far cry from the confident siren from a few moments ago.

A violet blush starts to spread over Rain's face, making the silver freckles really stand out on his cheeks. They flicker iridescent in the sun, silver and rainbow glittering in the light. Mountain smiles, continuing the path of his finger along the edge of Rain's ear.

Rain stammers, stock still between Mountain's legs. "Lucifer, you always make me blush so damn much," Rain spits out. But Mountain knows him too well. He's only pretending to be embarrassed. Mountain can't see it, but he knows his tail is flicking through the water behind him. He doesn't move away from Mountain's touch, the most damning evidence of all.

"Oh, come on, pretty little siren," Mountain says, finger trailing from the shell of his ear down the line of his jaw. He takes the point of Rain's chin between his fingers, guiding him to look up at him. "What's wrong with that?"

Rain's expression softens, leaning into Mountain's hand. "Oh, nothing," he says, cheeks dimpling. His thumb still smooths little patterns against his ankle, and his other hand comes up to rest against his wrist. "Nothing at all."

Mountain leans in to press a kiss to Rain's dusky violet lips. Rain's grip on his limbs shifts, suddenly irontight around his joints.

He has just a moment for his eyes to go wide before Rain dives under the surface, the force yanking him into the lake with a crash of water.

It's freezing. His eyes are still open, and he can see Rain's laughter bubbling from his gills and mouth. If he didn't have to worry about breathing, he could live in this moment forever.

They both breach the surface, Mountain sucking in a gasp and spitting out water. "Rain!" He gasps, faux-admonished as he treads water. Rain laughs, and it's more beautiful than any siren's song. He runs his fingers through his hair, shoving tangled auburn strands back from his antlers.

Once the initial shock of cold ebbs, Mountain grins, something wicked in his emerald eyes as he splashes Rain. The water ghoul splutters, before splashing him back.

Their laughter carries all the way back to the Abbey.

#god i forget how much i love mountrain #i need to do more with them #dot's writing #the band ghost #the band ghost fanfiction #mountain ghoul #rain ghoul #mountain/rain

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t00thpasteface · 1 month

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This is a reference guide to establish a clear foundation for the anatomy of the catcatfish, with attention paid to where the sarcopterygian half and actinopterygian half may be in conflict. I'm famously averse to drawing stuff on-model, and my own designs are no exception... I'll tweak a catcatfish's proportions as the piece demands it, and I like trying out different ways to stylize stuff. I made this to counterbalance/compensate for that, and reveal the baseline I've personally been working off of.

MUSCULOSKELETAL

Catcatfish have short, stocky limbs and a significant amount of body fat, giving them a hydrodynamic silhouette. The limbs are also widely spaced so that the catcatfish may undulate its trunk along with its tail during aerobic swimming. The body fat helps maintain buoyancy, as does the air that is held in the lungs while swimming. Nearly all of the catcatfish's body is covered in a short, dense, oily fur, with the exception of the fins, barbels, and toe pads; this fur traps body heat underwater and dries quickly on land.

The catcatfish's dorsal fin has one hard spine on the anterior edge, followed by several soft rays consistent with the number seen in the corresponding catfish species. These join to pterygiophores that interlock with the vertebrae to anchor the fin above the spinal column. The spine and rays of the fin are capable of a lever-like movement, allowing the fin to be raised and lowered for locomotion, communication, and thermoregulation. The adipose fin on the tail is composed of a thin, hairless skin without any spines or rays.

The tail vertebrae have pronounced neural and haemal spines to anchor the swimming muscles. Most of the muscles in the tail are white (glycolytic) muscle, which is used for short bursts of extremely rapid movement. Narrow bands of red (oxidative) muscle run down the length of the tail along the horizontal septum for slow, aerobic swimming. The limbs are used in a paddling motion during slow swimming and tucked in close to the body during fast swimming.

SKULL AND HEAD

Catcatfish have a feline skull, but its shape is more depressed than those of housecats.

The eyes and eyesockets are greatly reduced and widely spaced in most species, with more of the skull space devoted to the enlarged oral and nasal cavities, as they do most of their hunting by smell and hearing and are not very discerning about prey type.

Barbels are present in all life stages. The barbels are hairless and highly enervated so that they may function as smell/taste organs. Catcatfish will flex and wiggle their barbels to pinpoint food, navigate a low-visibility environment, and communicate with other members of their species.

Catcatfish have prominent canine teeth, but their molars and premolars are absent. They eat by swallowing prey whole, and prefer to hunt underwater by catching prey with their forelimbs and gulping it with powerful suction. If hunting on land, they may dunk their prey in a nearby body of water to make it easier to swallow. They are capable of pulling their lips relatively far back on their face and will do this as a threat display. They use their raspy tongues to groom themselves like other felids, distributing oils throughout their fur.

RESPIRATION

The gills of the catcatfish are located in the neck, just anterior to the clavicles. The throat is very wide to accommodate both the gill arches and whole swallowed prey. The esophagus and windpipe separate posterior to the gill arches so that the gill rakers can catch additional food as water is sifted through. Due to both the size and structure of the throat, the catcatfish's "meow" is very low and hoarse, and it will also vocalize with growling and grunting. Most communication between catcatfish is through body language, and vocalization is not possible underwater.

Air is inhaled through a negative pressure system, i.e. through the manipulation of a diaphragm below the lungs. Water intake uses a positive pressure system in which water is gulped into the mouth and "swallowed" via pressure from the tongue and hyomandibular complex to force it outward through the gill openings. While swimming at high speeds, the catcatfish will hold its mouth open to allow a continuous oxygenation without the additional energy expenditure of the gulping motion.

The lungs are comprised of seven separate lobes, nearly identical to those of a domestic cat. To prevent aspiration of water into the lungs, the windpipe has a fleshy valve that reflexively seals off the lungs as the animal goes underwater. Air held in the lungs maintains the catcatfish's buoyancy, and the catcatfish will periodically breach to exhale and inhale at the water's surface to supplement its oxygen intake while swimming.

Breaching occurs more frequently in waters with higher temperatures and/or salinities due to decreased oxygen saturation in the water. Catcatfish have a lower body temperature and slower metabolism than mammals, and during the winter, when temperatures are low and prey is scarce, they may periodically enter a state of torpor where they will exhale the air from their lungs and lie still on the bottom of a body of water without breaching to conserve energy for prolonged periods of time. Catcatfish prefer to sleep on land, but may sleep underwater in short thirty-minute naps if the water's oxygen saturation is high and the currents are relatively calm.

While on land, the operculum is pressed flat against the gills as a protective mucus is secreted over the sensitive filaments to prevent the gills from being damaged or drying out; this mucus sheds quickly when the catcatfish returns to the water.

REPRODUCTION

Catcatfish have one mating season annually, beginning in early spring shortly after the last major cold snap in the area (typically late March or early April) and lasting until autumn begins about six or seven months later. Within this window, a catcatfish may raise up to two litters, one immediately after the other, but may only raise one if conditions are not ideal.

The courtship process of the catcatfish involves the male building a nest on land very close to shore by digging a shallow pit into the earth, then padding and fencing it with soft plant matter gathered from the nearby area; catcatfish have also been observed collecting scrap fabric and discarded apparel for nest construction. The male will wait near the nest for a female to approach and the pair will engage in an elaborate courtship dance. They will remain in the immediate area for the next three months as the young gestate, nurse, and wean. Catcatfish are monogamous in a given mating season.

Catcatfish are oviparous; they lay eggs that hatch outside of the mother. The gestation time is about two months, but for the first half of the gestation, the eggs are retained inside the mother as they each develop a large yolk sac. Unlike egg-laying mammals, which lay waterproof leathery eggs, catcatfish eggs resemble those of bony fish; they are translucent, with the embryo visible inside, and they must be submerged in water for the embryo to receive oxygen.

Like many species of catfish, catcatfish are mouthbrooders. During the first half of gestation, and often even well before courtship, the male catcatfish will gorge himself to gain massive stores of body fat. After the eggs have gestated for a little over a month, the female will lay the full litter of eggs (typically 3 to 5 total) within the mouth of the male. Over the course of the next few weeks, the male will subsist on his fat stores, as well any small food items collected by his gill rakers, as he continuously carries the eggs in his mouth until they hatch. This protects the eggs from predators and ensures constant oxygenation via the water constantly being pumped into the mouth and out through the gills. The male is fairly inactive during this time and remains mostly underwater, with periodic breaches to gulp air; cooler water temperatures are preferred for the higher dissolved oxygen content. The female will remain close by to offer further protection, and she maintains their nest on land.

Mouthbrooding ceases once the eggs hatch. The larvae, called "kitterlings", hatch with a yolk sac still attached, which depletes over the next 24-48 hours, as well as with open eyes and all four limbs visibly developed, though they are virtually immobile while on land. They are also toothless and have no venemous barbs yet. As they hatch, the male will bring them onto land and deposit them from his mouth onto the soft bed of the nest. They will spend much of their time sleeping and nursing during the first two weeks after hatching, and the female will nurse them in the nest instead of underwater. The male will guard the kitterlings as the female occasionally hunts for her own food, but he may also carry prey to her while she nurses or rests. The rest of the time, the male will be eating frequently to replenish his greatly expended fat stores. The kitterlings grow and develop quickly and will be weaned after four to six weeks.

Hope you got a kick out of this! In the future, I'd like to explore a few of the many, many wonderful species of catcatfish in similar detail, as the one pictured in this post, the blue catcatfish, is only one of several known (and unknown) varieties.

I wrote about the "why" of their design on this post, and I recommend checking that out if you enjoyed learning about the "how". All the fun stuff I've posted about catcatfish is in my catcatfish tag.

Thanks for all the love so far, everyone! The catcatfish project is very near and dear to my heart, as you can tell... so your enthusiasm means more to me than I could possibly express. 🐈🐈🐟

#art #orig #catcatfish #speculative biology #original species #cat #fish #catfish

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