#get in my beak(er)
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I was so scare when i saw this
Rei.... what are you going to do to those slimes where my party is at serious risk of die
#instantly imagines rei running after them in his thigh high boots like#get in my beak(er)#aims a comically large straw at the slimes and increases clacking speed#sorcerer's trials#nu carnival rei
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Day 8 - Reunion
Drew out a little snippet from @donze-trash's fic for @mesdelostrescaballeros2024!!
Part of a larger continuity being uploaded on ao3! Read it below ⬇️
Donald pulled up outside the apartment where Panchito was staying and took a deep, fortifying breath. Of course he was excited to see his friend again! Of course he was excited for The Three Caballeros to be once more reunited, even if only for a day. There was just that one catch—he felt bad even calling it a catch, like it was somehow a bad thing that he and Zé had finally professed their love for one another—but it would always be awkward telling Panchito. Surely, the duck thought with an internal groan, things would unavoidably change within the trio.
To make it all worse, José had been away on flight shifts when Panchito arrived in town, and Donald had agreed to only break the news when his new boyfriend had returned. He was a terrible liar about this kind of thing: his tongue got all tied up and his beak chattered when he spoke. How in the hell was he supposed to—?
The Donald Duck Pity Party was cut short as sharp, energetic chatter caught his ear from the street: Panchito was being seen off and heading straight for the car. Donald flung himself toward the back seat, toward the gift José had planned to hand over today, and hastily threw a spare blanket over it. The thick, scratchy wool did a decent job of concealing the obvious shape of a brand new guitar, at least if you didn't pay it mind. They'd give it to him when they were all together. That's how they were supposed to do things. Together.
Panchito appeared, waving goodbye to someone before bounding out of the apartment complex. His face lit up when he saw Donald, and before Donald could even get a word out, Panchito had leapt into the front seat, pulling him into a bear hug. His wide sombrero wobbled dangerously, but he didn't seem to care.
"¡Ay caramba, amigo! What took you so long to get here?" Panchito exclaimed, yanking Donald into his arms despite protest from his seatbelt, all to kiss Donald's cheek with his usual enthusiasm.
"'Ey, Pancho! How you doin' amigo?" The duck choked out, finding it a little easier to act natural amid the strangulation.
Panchito released Donald to pinch his cheek playfully. "Better with you here! I've been working on that new song I told you about last night! What about you? What have you been up to all day?"
"I'm doin' swell! And nothing much! Been taking 'er easy today." He lied, and not well—he was already talking too much. "Excited, though! Not every day I get to hang out with my two best pals!" Donald pulled away from Panchito's hold in order to return his attention to driving, feeling too awkward to linger in the warm hold, however much he usually would.
The charro clicked the seatbelt into place and leaned back in his seat, apparently unfazed by the duck's haste. "Ay güey, I'm just hyped that we are finally getting together again for a change. So, what are we doing this time? Are we gonna hit up the club so hard we get kicked out again? Or maybe reopen the Magical Mythical Monster Petting Zoo from Scrooge's secret vault? Or how about we raid the Anvilania embassy and get the ambassador drunk again? You know she still calls me."
Donald nodded, absolutely not absorbing anything the rooster was clucking about in favor of focusing on the road. He was happy, of course; his friend's exuberance was infectious to say the least. It had indeed been too long since they got to hang out like this as a group… but a part of him still felt tense. He chanced another glance at the vaquero—oblivious, humming merrily, a long leg resting against the door as he propped up his foot on his knee and took up what little space his seat offered. He wished he could feel so carefree.
When they arrived at the little airport, Panchito's excitement was hard to miss. Before the car could even finish pulling up to the 15-minute zone, he'd unbuckled and bolted out of the car window, running ahead towards the tarmac and calling out for Zé at the top of his lungs.
"Yeah, don't wait up or nothing!" Donald called after him with a roll of his eyes. Crazy bird, he hadn't even put the car into park yet! The lighthearted atmosphere Panchito had cultivated was at war with the impulse to complain bubbling inside him because he wanted see Zé first, to get a chance to hold his boyfriend first before they had to act respectably platonic in front of their none the wiser companion. It wasn't jealousy, not exactly, just…
One hug, one second to let the weight of the week melt off was all he wanted. But that wasn't happening. Not yet. Instead, he'd have to wait and keep playing the part.
"Great," he muttered, jerking on the car's parking brake. "Just act natural. Simple."
The airport, while always abuzz with people from all walks of life and from every corner of the globe, was relatively less hectic on a weekday like this, and José was all the more grateful for it. Deplaning the small jet from Panama was fairly routine and done quickly, leaving Zé with a little free time before he met up with his friends. He brought with him his single suitcase, loaded with more clothes than his usual amount, plus some souvenirs from Brazil and the several other countries he had stopped in during the work week. There were things for the kids back at the manor, plus a homemade gaúcho style poncho pala made by his vovó for Della (whom the old bird had assumed was still freezing from her time on the Moon). Strapped to the outside of the suitcase (because it could not fit) and wrapped in cloth was José's gift to Donald, a new hammock for his houseboat. He hoped he would like it.
Walking to the exit, Zé attempted to steal himself for the reunion to come. Not so much for seeing Donald, though his blood ran quick with excitement for him to be sure. But Panchito, whom he had not seen since they met for that ill-fated holiday to Bahia that never came to fruition. They had kept in constant contact even after their break up, though it caused pain on both sides. They had been determined to preserve their eternal friendship even in the face of romantic disappointment. And though it took some years for Zé to be able to look the rooster in the face without the unbearable ache in his chest urging him to take it all back and try again, he never wanted to lose sight of what drew him and the other two Caballeros together in the first place. They were his family, no matter what happened.
Even when I act like a stupid teenager and run crying to my ex-boyfriend about my hopeless crush, which turned out to be not so hopeless after all because we're together now and— Merda!
Zé closed his eyes and inhaled slowly. It was very good that he had this spare moment to compose himself as he entered the airport proper.
The distant sound of a familiar crow cut through the din of the crowd, stopping Zé in his tracks. That voice—there was no mistaking it. And like the call to sunrise, it made his heart want to leap into the sky. Spotting a tall flash of red, and a hat that he insisted was too big for his head, standing tall amongst the crowd, Zé dropped his suitcase and his umbrella and ran forward like his tail was on fire. Before he even had time to think about it, he was launching himself into Panchito's arms. The rooster caught him instantly, just like old times.
"¡¡AAAAAAJAJAJAJAJA!!" Panchito's triumphant grito echoed across the terminal. His grip was tight, almost desperate, and his wide grin spoke volumes. Zé could feel the emotion radiating from him—Panchito had missed him more than words could ever say, that much was clear. His whole body seemed to hum with excitement.
"José!! Mi cielo!" Panchito crowed, his voice overflowing with affection as he slowly, reluctantly, released the green parrot.
Zé smiled warmly, returning the sentiment. "It is so good to see you, docinho!" His tone was as light and affectionate as ever. "It has been too long!"
"No manches, pendejo, it's only been a few months!" Panchito guffawed, his eyes sparkling with unfiltered happiness. His grin stretched wide as he shook his head in disbelief, the warmth in his expression unmistakable. The man was an open book, his emotions always worn on his sleeve.
The malandro chuckled softly, adjusting his hat. "Well, yes, but it has been twice as long since the three of us have been—" He stopped, scanning the area. "Espere, onde está o Donald?"
Panchito's expression shifted briefly—a flicker of realization, maybe impatience. He glanced back toward the car, where Zé knew Donald must still be catching up. The vaquero's elation had clearly driven him to rush ahead, leaving their other friend behind. Zé could almost feel the mixture of emotions brewing under Panchito's playful exterior, a familiar tug of longing buried in the joy of reunion.
But Zé knew better than to bring that up. He simply smiled again, his voice calm, teasing. "Always in a rush, eh mano?"
"Life is too short to sit still," the rooster replied assuredly, and his hand which still rested on his waist in a half hug pulled him in for just an instant, a punctuation to the point.
"Hey, ya found 'im! Over here, guys!!!!" a distinctive voice cut through the busy hum of the arrival hall and Zé immediately turned towards the sound, his heart immediately catapulting into the stratosphere.
"DONAL'!" he and Panchito shouted in unison, their voices echoing across the platform. The moment the malandro caught sight of Donald looking flustered and determined as ever as he weaved through the crowd, all the excitement, the nerves, the longing came rushing back to him. He broke from Panchito's hold to sprint to him with ever increasing urgency, his heart pounding not from exertion but from sheer jubilation.
Quickly he closed the distance between them, throwing his arms around the sailor and pulling him into a tight embrace. He fit into his arms perfectly, and for a moment he didn't want to let go. Donald absorbed the impact with ease and let Zé down safely, the rest of the world seeming to melt away in an instant. Zé quickly buried his face into Donald's shoulder, feeling the comforting weight of his lover's arms around him. There was relief, adoration, and an overwhelming sense of peace. Even for just a fleeting moment, everything felt right—like he was where he belonged.
"Meu querido..." Zé whispered softly, just for Donald, though he didn't linger on the words. He knew this interlude was fleeting.
Sure enough, as if sensing their private moment was up, Donald's voice broke through their quiet intimacy. "Panchito...?" Donald called, one arm still wrapped around Zé as he extended the other towards their rambunctious rooster to include him.
Zé was too distracted with cuddling up to his sailor's side to register the gleam in Panchito's eye, at first. As it was, it was only the loud, triumphant yell that signaled their impending doom, and the parrot felt he had little choice but to make sure he didn't endure it alone, his arm holding his duck in place.
"No, wait—!" Donald started, but it was too late.
Panchito came down hard from where he had launched himself into the air like a luchador delivering his finishing move. Elbow extended, he crashed into the two of them with the energy of a firecracker bursting on impact. Donald let out a choked WAK! of surprise, his arms flailing as he was knocked clean off balance. Zé, caught in the middle of it all, simply accepted his fate with a laugh, not even trying to brace for the collision.
They tumbled down in a heap of feathers, beaks, and limbs, Zé wedged between his two best friends, both of them piled on top of Donald, who lay sprawled at the bottom. He could feel Donald wheezing beneath him, dazed from the sudden assault, while Panchito—of course—was perched victoriously at the top of the pile, leaning on one elbow like he owned the world.
"Órale! ¿Que te pasa? You were supposed to catch me!" Panchito chortled, looking entirely too pleased with himself as he flashed a wide, playful grin down at the both of them. "I could have gotten hurt!"
"God forbid…" Donald rasped weakly.
Zé couldn't help but chuckle, even as he lay squashed in the middle. Completely unconcerned by the chaos, he wiggled into a more comfortable position between them, his head resting against Donald's back. He could feel the frantic beat of his partner's heart beneath his cheek, could hear the shallow breaths as Donald tried to recover. There was no tension, no frustration. Just pure, unbridled affection. Even in moments like this—especially in moments like this—Zé felt nothing but love for the both of them.
This was how it had always been with the three of them. Chaos and laughter, roughhousing and tenderness, all tangled together in one messy, beautiful friendship.
"Well, caras," Zé sighed contentedly, "it is good to be back where I belong."
"Where, with all of ya on top of me?" the sailor beneath him groaned, barely able to get out a full breath with all the pressure bearing down on him.
Don't tempt me, the malandro thought before immediately shelving it for later.
#mesdelostrescaballeros2024#donze#three gay caballeros#donald duck#ze carioca#panchito pistoles#omg it's so bonkers late
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Oh! Do you think it’s possible for you to do a drabble about Julian & Portia getting more in tune with magic and subsequently their familier’s? Maybe one about Julian finally being able to understand Malak in some way, shape, or form?
You know that, technically, this could be considered cheating, but both of your students have really been working at the "getting in touch with my familiar" thing and seeing either of them discouraged is like ice to your chest. You approach the Devorak siblings with the pouch of dust you've spent all the previous day on and hope this goes as well as you've planned.
"MC? What's that?"
"It's a communication enchantment. It'll only last a few minutes, but if I sprinkle this on Pepi and Malak you should be able to understand their voices."
Julian perks up. Portia claps her hands in excitement. Pepi hops off of her lap to approach you, tail up in anticipation. Malak is uncharacteristically calm, watching his master's obliviousness to him, and seemingly brewing the calm before the storm. You're a little worried about that but it's too late to back out now.
"Could you please stand in front of me and hold your familiars?"
The two redheads follow your cues, the animals involved holding still as you murmur a few words under your breath and upend the pouch over them. There's a moment of expectant silence. Portia looks down at where her cat is cradled in her arms.
"Pepi? Can you hear me okay, baby?"
"I'm always hearing you, peep!"
You turn from where they're both erupting into happy giggles and excited talking to where Malak is still perched on Julian's glove, eerily silent. The doctor glances nervously from your face to the raven's cold, menacing aura and back to you. You give him an encouraging nod.
"Go on."
"Ah - er, Malak -"
"You BASTARD!"
You stand frozen in shock as the raven lets out years of pent up stress and loving frustration in an unholy screech. Julian starts to stammer as Malak unloads a relationship's worth of miscommunications on him.
"DO YOU REMEMBER FIRENT? I WAS TELLING YOU TO GO LEFT. LEFT, TO THE PUB, YOU MADMAN, NOT RUNNING BACK TOWARDS THE GUARDS WHILE YOU TOLD ME TO GET AWAY! I'M A BIRD! DO YOU THINK THEY CAN FOLLOW ME INTO THE AIR?!?"
"M-Malak, my old friend -"
"OLD FRIENDS? IS THAT WHAT WE ARE? ALL YOU CALL ME IS 'THE RAVEN'! I DON'T KNOW IF YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT ME OR THE TAVERN!"
"Well, yes, I ah - I suppose I haven't been very fair to you -"
"FAIR?! YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT'S NOT FAIR?! I'VE BEEN KEEPING WATCH OVER YOU EVERY NIGHT FOR YEARS AND YOU STILL ACT LIKE IT'S NOT SAFE TO SLEEP. OH, AND YOU REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED IN THE CROW'S NEST?!"
"Let's not get ahead of ourselves -"
"I TOLD YOU TO STAY SAFE UP THERE, BUT NOOO, YOU JUST HAD TO GET TANGLED IN THE RIGGING WHILE THE SHIP WAS ATTACKED. AND ABOUT THAT PASSING IN THE STRAIT OF SEALS -"
"You're right!" Julian's started to cower in front of Malak's onslaught, clearly regretful. "I'm a terrible master! You don't deserve - no, you never deserved to be stuck with someone like me. I've brought nothing but misery to you -"
"YOU'RE MISSING THE POINT, YOU -"
And Malak's tirade cuts off with a loud squawk, wings flapping up a whirlwind of feathers as the spell wears off. Julian straightens up at the realization with his attempt at a dastardly grin.
"Hah! Not so easy to torment this wretched man now, is it?"
He winces when the enraged corvid lets out an ear-piercing screech. Malak takes advantage of his eyepatched blind side, hops up the doctor's arm, seizes a clump of red curls in his beak, and gives them a firm tweak with a twitch of his head. Julian yelps.
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I take it back!"
You glance from the ongoing kerfuffle to where Portia and Pepi are sitting wide-eyed on the floor, cuddling each other peacefully and soaking up the drama with the occasional catlike smirk.
"It's about time he had someone besides me give him a real talking-to."
"Peep!"
#ask arcana brainrot#the arcana#the arcana game#the arcana drabble#the arcana imagine#the arcana fanfic#julian devorak#julian the arcana#portia the arcana#portia devorak
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Imagine Jaune as Scott Sterling(from Studio C). How funny would that be? Pyrrha would probably sue the coach and let Nora beat up the team.
Oobleck: Welcome back to our coverage of the game between Teams RWBY and JNPR.
Port: If you're just joining us today, you've missed most of an unbelievably well fought match between two incredible teams tonight. It has all come down to the final, penalty shots. All it takes is enough points for either team. Here comes the kick...
Pyrrha: (Kicks, Scores goal)
Oobleck: OH! SPECTACULAR! Team JNPR's star player, Pyrrha Nikos, has just landed a goal for her team, so now the burden rests on Team JNPR's goal-keeper, Jaune Arc.
Port: Here he comes. A fine lad with nerves of steel. He's got more hanging over him than the city of Mantle right now.
Oobleck: Indeed, and it seems the fans are showing their appreciation for it. Yang Xiao Long places the ball on the spot, getting ready.
Port: That girl literally has a cannon for a leg, and here she comes! Winding up for the shot and-
Yang: (Kicks)
Jaune: (Pelted in the face)
Oobleck/Port: OOOOOOOOOOOOH!
Port: THE CANNON HAS FIRED AND HAS STRUCK JAUNE ARC IN THE FACE DIRECTLY!
Oobleck: We clocked that at a stunning 116 kilometers per hour!
Port: Now that's a lot of, er, miles per hour!
Oobleck: Even with aura, there is no chance that young man's nose isn't broken right now.
Port: Oh, indeed!
Jaune: (Dazed)
Goodwitch: (Shining a light in his face, Nods, Leaves)
Port: Now it seems Team JNPR's coach, Professor Goodwitch, is examining him and deems him fit for duty after a short rest. Sadly, he's not out of the woods yet.
Oobleck: On his feet now, a bit shaken.
Port: But not stirred!
Oobleck/Port: HAHAHAHA!
Port: This crowd absolutely loves this young man.
Oobleck: He returns to his team, who welcome him back as a hero. And now comes another penalty kick, and scoring here would make it two nil. Nora Valkyrie approaches the ball with determination!
Nora: (Kicks, Misses goal)
Port: She hits high and wide, way off target!
Oobleck: She must have thought she was playing Mantle Football and attempting a field goal!
Port: Wrong kind of football, I'd say! And back now to Jaune Arc, looking a bit worse for wear, but ready for round two.
Oobleck: The shot takes a moment, but here comes Belladonna!
Blake: (Kicks)
Jaune: (Beaned in the schnozz)
Oobleck/Port: OOOOOOOOOOOOH!
Port: Jaune Arc with the fantastic dive! The ball flies straight through the air and his hands and whacks Jaune Arc right in the sniffer!
Oobleck: Looking again on the instant replay and OH! EVERY EXCRUCIATING DETAIL IS CAPTURED PERFECTLY IN HIGH-DEFINITION PERFECTION! Clocked in at 129 kilometers per hour.
Port: Arc does not look well. Two wonderful saves compounding two DEFINITE concussions.
Goodwitch: (Carries Jaune on shoulder)
Jaune: (Falls, Dragged away)
Oobleck: This seems to be the end of Jaune Arc's performance tonight.
Port: Indeed, as his coach pulls him through the grass and off the field, like a large-breasted lioness dragging a gazelle with a broken nose across the savannah.
Oobleck: Adieu, Jaune Arc. Adieu.
Port: JNPR now with their third PK. Weiss bouncing at the goal like an infant. The crowd holds their breath as Valkyrie moves in... OH! Very anticlimactic there. Let's see who they got to replace Jaune Ar-
Oobleck/Port: JAUNE ARC!
Port: JAUNE ARC IS BACK!
Oobleck: Jaune Arc is still in the game! Oh my, and it seems he's taken a very odd tactic now!
Port: He seems to be in the fetal position, covering his face.
Oobleck: Not a recommended technique, but here it co- Oh, wait! It seems Weiss Schnee is stopping to tie her shoe.
Port: Ho ho! And that's why you do a double-knot, kids!
Oobleck: Arc, still waiting for the kick to happen. He's probably wondering when the-
Jaune: (Looks up)
Weiss: (Kicks, Pops him in the beak)
Oobleck/Port: OOOOOOOOOOOOH!
Oobleck: SWEET, CREAMY DECAF!
Port: The ball strikes Arc right in the face, further crushing his nostrils into thin slits! He must be breathing only blood by now! He's going to look like one of those cartoon characters that just ran into a frying pan while they were chasing after a mouse!
Oobleck: I don't even care that we missed Lie Ren's attempt! Let's go back to-
Oobleck/Port: JAUNE ARC!
Port: THE MAN!
Oobleck: THE MYTH!
Oobleck/Port: THE LEGEND!
Jaune: (Stumbling to the goal, Bloodied and battered)
Port: I can't wait to see Arc and his catlike face reflexes!
Oobleck: Absolutely incredible, though I must say that Arc does not look well at all lying on the ground there.
Port: Well, you know athletes. They like to add a bit of drama to their performances.
Jaune: (Picked up by Ren and Nora)
Port: Are they taking him out?
Pyrrha: (Runs out with chair)
Oobleck: They brought him a chair! A bold move by their coach!
Jaune: (Reaches for his team leaving)
Oobleck: This is basically a gimme! Ruby Rose has to literally kick it anywhere that isn't where Jaune Arc is!
Port: There is no way Team RWBY can mess up this shot!
Jaune: (Begging Ruby)
Ruby: (Kicks, Craters his face)
Oobleck/Port: OOOOOOOOOOOOH!
Oobleck: ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY-EIGHT KILOMETERS PER HOUR!
Port: THIS MAN CAN DO NO WRONG! Just look at him in this instant replay, begging for mercy when it should be mercy begging for him!
Oobleck: He has looked Death in the eye and said, "Take your best shot!" To which Death replies with repeated punches to Arc's face! Just over and over and over again!
Port: If Team JNPR make this final shot, it's all over! But-
Oobleck/Port: OOOOOOOOOOOOH!
Port: No! Pyrrha Nikos misses, clearly too distracted by the wounds her partner, Jaune Arc, has sustained in this game! Speaking of, it's time we go back to-
Oobleck/Port: JAUNE! ARC!
Port: His face is like a brick wall!
Oobleck: A brick wall that can feel only pain and cries a lot!
Port: Wait a minute... I see Team RWBY's star kicker, Penny Polendina, but where's Jaune Arc?
Oobleck: ...Oh! It seems Arc is crawling away from the goal! WHAT IS HE DOING?!
Port: HE'S THROWING AWAY THE MATCH!
Penny: (Kicks exactly where she needs to)
Jaune: (...Words cannot describe the calamity of what just happened. At least, they fail to accurately depict what could be described as what really happened. The only accuracy that could be described in this space is that there was physical contact between Jaune Arc's face and a large, head-sized ball, and that there was a lot of bodily fluids that resulted from this contact, and that Jaune Arc was in so much pain that it's likely he passed out or away, though it's also just as likely that he didn't.)
Oobleck/Port: OOOOOOOOOOOOH!
Port: ARC HAS DONE THE IMPOSSIBLE!
Oobleck: ICAN'TBELIEVEIT! LOOKATTHAT! HE'SDONETHEIMPOSSIBLE! He was hit just right! What incredible instincts he had to just crawl away from the goal like that!
Port: His team rushes to the field, happy as a lark, as they all slide in and accidentally kick Jaune Arc in the face!
Oobleck: And now his team his carrying him off and away on an orange stretch of victory, glory, and emergency medical attention! Jaune Arc and his face of steel have won it all!
#rwby#scott sterling#studio c#pyrrha nikos#nora valkyrie#jaune arc#peter port#bartholomew oobleck#lie ren#ruby rose#weiss schnee#blake belladona#penny polendina#yang xiao long#glynda goodwitch
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The Door Knocker Considers Retirement.
Since Aurélie's birthday didn't get a mention in Villain (because of er, reasons pertaining to angst), I wanted to honour the occasion with a oneshot. This was supposed to be super duper fluffy, but for reasons pertaining to my chaos brain not knowing how to be normal, uh… this happened instead.
Content warnings: none, just some good old fashioned sfw chaos in which a birthday gift goes horribly awry and the door knocker cops a fist to the beak. Sebastian x Garreth rivalry. Sebastian Sallow x F!OC Aurélie Collins.
Word count: 2.3k
Preview: The girls’ screamed like banshee's, pushing and shoving each other in their desperation to flee. One of them fell over, dragging two of her friends down with her. The door knocker let out an almighty screech as another girl somehow punched it square in the beak. Somebody was crying for their mother.
When January twenty-sixth finally rolled around, frozen over with snow and misery, Aurélie woke early in her dorm (as was usual) with cold fingers and toes (also usual) determined that she would have the most usual, non-eventful, non-birthdayish day that it was possible for anyone to have.
Unfortunately, life at Hogwarts was neither usual nor non-eventful, for the second her feet touched the cold floor, she was assaulted with a rousing 'Happy birthday!' from the bunk above her. A moment later, a potted Dittany popped through Samantha's bed curtains, followed shortly by her smiling face.
'I've been lying awake for ages waiting for you to wake up!' she grinned, hopping lightly from her bunk and bequeathing the potted plant like a crown. 'I grew this one especially for you! I'm not sure why, but ever since you arrived, my Dittany's have been growing exceptionally well.'
Months earlier, Aurélie had found a thriving Dittany to replace the half-dead specimen of Samantha's she'd accidentally poofed into the ether, and Samantha, as expected, had attributed the miraculous recovery of her sick plant to an equally miraculous recovery of her questionable Herbology skills. Now, considering herself something of an expert, she'd taken to gifting her friends so many Dittany plants that the common room, according to Everett Clopton, was beginning to resemble that of the Hufflepuff's. Little did anyone realise that Aurélie, feeling a sense of misplaced responsibility, had been secretly keeping them all alive with little offshoots of her Ancient Magic whenever she could.
'Oh, um, thank you,' said Aurélie, accepting her gift, and ultimately her fate to endure unwanted birthday wishes with as much grace as she could muster. 'But how did you know it was my birthday?'
Though she asked the question, she hardly needed an answer: the funny feeling in her tummy, something halfway between fluttering butterflies and angry ants, told her that one tenacious, freckled Slytherin boy was behind this most egregious betrayal of highly personal information. After all, Aurélie had made it a point — a point! – not to disclose her birthday to anyone, not even to Sebastian, who, despite his studious need to learn her like she was the most interesting book he'd ever read, had never actually asked when it was. — Which, now that she thought about it, should've been the first clue that he already knew.
She didn't have to wait long to find out.
Expecting the worst, she was unsurprised to find her trio of unlikely companions waiting for her outside the Ravenclaw common room: Mouse, small and, well, mousey; Poppy, who squealed with delight while brandishing what was clearly a birthday gift; and Sebastian, who knew he was in trouble by the look Aurélie sent him.
‘Happy birthday!’ Poppy sang, throwing her arms around Aurélie's middle with a force that almost sent them toppling over.
‘Thank you,’ she returned flatly, leveling Sebastian a glare over Poppy's shoulder. ‘How ever did you know?’
While Poppy flat-out ignored the question, Sebastian returned her glare with one of his slow-spreading smiles that made her chest tighten and her stomach flip.
Stupid handsome smile.
‘Happy birthday,’ he said once she was freed from Poppy's tight embrace. He made no move to touch her, but his fingers flexed and his eyes had that gleam in them that said I want to kiss you ‘til you can't remember your own name.
She promptly averted her attention, trying to ignore the way her heart was beating all over her body by politely refusing the gift Poppy was pressing into her hands.
‘This is from all of us,’ Poppy said breathlessly. ‘The Hufflepuff's, I mean. We all put in for it. It's a book!’ She bounced excitedly on the balls of her feet. ‘Because, well, you are a Ravenclaw, but it's a pretty book, because you're French and —’
‘Why don't you let her open it first, Poppy,’ Sebastian cut in, while at the same time, Mouse scurried forward to present her with a half-empty box of chocolate frogs, and Samantha Dale popped her head out from the common room to tell her, ‘I've just set your Dittany by the windowsill, Aurélie. They always used to die whenever I left them there, but now they absolutely thrive! It's the strangest thing. — Oh, hello Poppy, Sebastian! What's that you've got there? Another birthday gift? Well, go on, then, open it!’
Suddenly surrounded by a small, eager audience, Aurélie had no choice but to unwrap the gift while Poppy shuffled impatiently from foot to foot, and Mouse stole another chocolate frog from the box under her arm, and Sebastian watched with far, far too much amusement for someone who was minutes away from dealing with a very unhappy girlfriend.
Prepared to discover the aforementioned book as she peeled back the plain brown wrapping paper, she was instead met with something brown and hairy that growled at her. She froze, clutching the book-shaped thing in her hands while Samantha shrieked and Poppy spluttered in confusion.
Immediately, Sebastian elbowed his way closer.
‘What is that?’ he demanded, snatching the half-wrapped thing from her hands. ‘Poppy, what the fu—’
But he was cut short when the thing tore through the wrapping paper, leapt to the ground and began scuttling around on spindly little legs: not a book, but some sort of narrow, semi-sentient wooden chest.
Poppy was beside herself. ‘That's not the gift I wrapped yesterday!’ she wailed as Sebastian made a lunge for it. ‘I don't understand! What happened to the book?’
‘Don't worry about that now!’ Sebastian cried, leaping out of the way as the thing came for his ankles. ‘Just help me catch it!’
Somewhere in the midst of the chaos, Samantha Dale disappeared and Mouse made off with Aurélie's box of chocolates, leaving the three of them to deal with the rogue gift on their own.
‘Quick, usher it towards me!’ Sebastian, brandishing his wand, wore the same unadulterated expression of glee he often wore in Crossed Wands sessions. Given his propensity for fire spells, Aurélie thought it unlikely the Ravenclaw tower would go unscorched for much longer.
As if sensing its impending death-by-Slytherin, the thing made a wide circle around them, but when it turned abruptly and came for Aurélie, she shrieked in panic, hopping absurdly on the spot as it nipped at her shoes.
Sebastian launched into action. Diving toward her, he caught her by the waist and scooped her off the ground.
‘OI!’ he shouted, aiming a kick that connected with empty air. 'That's my girlfriend, you numpty!’
The thing took off again, growling chaotically as it went. Poppy, quicker on her feet than she looked, diverted it away from the stairs, but no sooner had she cornered it by the common room door did a group of fourth-year Ravenclaw's decide that now was the best time to make their way down to breakfast. Seeking an out, the thing made a bolt for the open door behind them, inspiring a chorus of horrified squeals and shouts as it scampered clumsily around the girls’ feet.
‘What is that?’ one of them shrieked.
‘It's a giant rat!’ another screamed, completely losing her head.
Pandemonium ensued.
The girls’ screamed like banshee's, pushing and shoving each other in their desperation to flee. One of them fell over, dragging two of her friends down with her. The door knocker let out an almighty screech as another girl somehow punched it square in the beak. Somebody was crying for their mother.
‘Shut the door!’ Sebastian roared over the screaming, but nobody listened. Swearing under his breath, he cast a well-aimed Accio that slammed the door closed before the thing could disappear into Ravenclaw tower. Running full tilt, it had no time to correct its course — it smacked bang into the closed door, bounced onto its back and flailed its little legs about like a hapless turtle caught on its shell. Aurélie seized the opportunity and hit it with a rather forceful Levioso, launching it upwards like a spring. Spinning wildly through the air, it smashed against the ceiling only to come barrelling back toward them at full speed.
‘Duck!’ Sebastian yelled, yanking her down.
The thing whizzed by, missing their heads by an inch. Unperturbed, Sebastian leapt up and cast another Accio as the last of the screaming Ravenclaw's fled to safety down the winding staircase, catching it before it could sail off after them to terrorise the school proper.
‘Gotcha!’ he said triumphantly. The thing, trembling in his grip, gave a pitiful little whine.
‘Don't hurt it!’ Aurélie fretted.
Sebastian threw her quite possibly the most incredulous side eye he'd ever cast and was ever likely to cast again. ‘It's not an animal, Aura!’
‘It's got legs though, doesn't it?’ Poppy panted, rushing over with her robes askew.
‘Yeah, so do tables and chairs but you don't go around worrying for their well being, do you?’ Holding it at arm's length, Sebastian studied the thing with a funny mix of curiosity, admiration, and mild disgust as it shook timidly in his hands, whimpering like some sort of cursed jewellery box for werewolves. ‘What is this thing, anyway?’
Poppy wrung her hands in distress. ‘I have no idea,’ she wailed, ‘but I swear to you, Aurélie, this is not the book I wrapped last — wait —’
Suddenly, her face went slack and her mouth fell open in horror, and as if on cue, Garreth Weasley came bolting up the marble stairs, red faced and so out of breath he could only flap his hands and grunt for several moments. Sebastian pointed his wand at him. Aurélie pushed it away.
‘Poppy —!’ Garreth gasped, gripping her shoulder while he fought valiantly not to asphyxiate. ‘Poppy — thank Godric I found you — the packages —’ He bent over double, resting his hands on his knees. ‘How — the bloody hell — do Ravenclaw's — live like this —’
Tucked under his arm was a book-shaped package, wrapped in brown paper much like the one Aurélie had just been gifted. Sebastian snatched it up with his free hand.
‘You,’ he growled. ‘I should have known this was your doing.’
Garreth looked up, his eyes falling first onto Sebastian's seething expression and then onto the package clutched in his hands. ‘Ah,’ he gulped. ‘I see you've found my Weasley's Wonders Potion Safe.’
‘Your what?’ demanded Sebastian as Aurélie caught his wand hand by the wrist again.
‘No, Sebastian,’ she hissed. Sebastian pouted.
‘Seems there was a mix up with our conveniently identical-looking packages when we spoke in the Great Hall yesterday, Poppy,’ Garreth explained with a sheepish grin.
Sebastian's expression was livid. ‘This monstrosity is yours?’
‘Hey, now!’ Garreth made a grab for it, but Sebastian held it out of reach. ‘It's a work in progress, alright?’
‘It almost ate my girlfriend!’
‘Look, it's not dangerous, it's just a new product I've been working on. Not a potion — obviously, you can see that, but a potion safe. Weasley's Wonders Potion Safe,’ he said with a flourish. When three pairs of eyes stared blankly back at him, he hurried on to explain, ‘It's a portable lockbox to store all your rare ingredients and keep your concoctions safe from the prying eyes of your competitors. It's supposed to, uh, be a bit aggressive about protecting its contents, you see,’ he added, grimacing as the thing snarled at him. ‘As I said, it's a work in progress.’
‘Why's it got legs if you're trying to keep your potions safe?’ Sebastian scowled.
‘And why is it hairy?’ Poppy put it.
‘That — uh, well, those were all accidental. I'm trying to figure out how to get rid of them, actually — the legs and, uh, the hair. I was going for something with a bit of bite, you know, but I don't think it's very, uh, marketable in its current state. Anyway!’ He extended his hand. ‘I'm happy to take it off your hands and get out of your hair.’
Sebastian squinted at him, and Aurélie could practically hear the Slytherin cogs whirring around in his brain; her hand tightened around his wrist lest he decide hexing a Gryffindor was more desirable than blackmailing one.
‘Maybe I should return this to your aunt,’ he said, evidently deciding on the latter.
Garreth rolled his eyes. ‘Bloody Slytherin's,’ he muttered darkly. ‘What do you want, Sallow? If it's gold, I have none.’
‘Pffsh, I don't want gold. I want a duel.’
‘What?’ Aurélie turned to him. ‘Oh, please no duelling, Sebastian,’ she implored while Poppy practically vibrated with excitement beside her. ‘Not today.’
‘No, not today,’ he replied, softening a little. ‘I have special plans for today.’
This time, it was her heart that summersaulted over itself. Stupid charming Slytherin with his eyes and his face.
‘Won't be much of a victory for you, Sallow,’ Garreth said. ‘I'm rubbish at duelling. Unless —’ his expression brightened considerably, ‘— we forgo the norm and employ the use of some fun additions.’
Sebastian quirked a brow. ‘Such as?’
‘Such as my Weasley's Wonder's Combat Potions!’
‘You want us to… throw potions at each other?’
‘Trust me, once you see these babies in action, you'll be begging me for an order form.’
‘I doubt that, but fine,’ Sebastian conceded, handing the so-called potion safe back to its master. ‘I'll owl you the time and place.’
‘Brilliant!’ Garreth nodded triumphantly as if he'd just completed a lucrative business deal. ‘Oh, and by the way…’ he adding, turning to Aurélie with a wink, and before Sebastian could say absolutely fucking not, he withdrew (with much difficulty) a sparkling lilac potion from within the growling box. ‘Happy birthday!’
Aurélie felt her ears grow warm with fresh indignation. Even Garreth bloody Weasley knew it was her birthday?
‘Have you got a fucking death wish, Weasley?’ Sebastian snarled, raising his wand again. ‘I told you to keep your experiments away from her!’
Garreth gave a dramatic start. ‘Welp, best be off!’ he said, taking the stairs two at a time. ‘Sorry again about the mishap! Won't happen again. Oh, do let me know how you get on with that potion, Aurélie. It's designed to help the drinker face a truth they've been avoiding — like having an overbearing, arrogant Slytherin twat as a boyfriend.’
Sebastian took off after him. ‘Weasley, you prat, I've changed my mind! Duel me right now, you coward!’
#morelikeravenbore writes#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow#aurelie collins#hogwarts legacy fandom#hogwarts legacy oneshot#sebastian sallow oneshot#hogwarts legacy fanfiction#sebastian sallow fanfiction#hogwarts legacy oc
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Prompt 16 - Invisible
@jegulus-microfic August 16, Word count 1000
Previous part First Wolfstar part
Dumbledore’s answer came swiftly, carried with his phoenix patronus. Regulus didn’t think it was nearly as impressive as James’s stag, but he kept that to himself as his old headmaster’s voice sounded from the bird’s open beak.
“You are welcome, of course, whenever you are available. The password for the Slytherin Common room is, Oxyuranus microlepidotus. I would ask that you come to my office to discuss a few things once you have done whatever it is that you are doing.” The message ended there.
"Oxyuranus microlepidotus, that’s a weird one,” James said, his face screwed up as he tried to decipher the meaning.
“It’s the Latin name for the most poisonous snake in the world, the Inland taipan,” Regulus told him. “It’s found in Australia. It’s tiny but packs a punch when it bites.” Regulus shrugged his shoulders. Barty had called him one before, as the snake tends to be quite shy unless provoked, and then you’d better watch out.
“Fair enough. Right cloak on we’re going back to school,” James grinned at him. Regulus threw the cloak over himself and took James’s proffered hand and they apparated.
They landed just outside of Hogsmeade, not far from the shrieking shack. Regulus shivered when he looked at the dilapidated abandoned house. James began to walk forward and, after checking no one was watching him, made his way towards the shrieking shack.
“James, we can’t go near it. It’s haunted!” Regulus hissed as quietly as he could at James’s side.
“It’s not,” James’s face had a tightness to it that Regulus hadn’t seen before, tinged with sadness. “Trust me, it’s fine,” He said, pushing open the cracked front door. Regulus paused only a moment before he followed James into the gloomy house, the door closing far quieter than it should have behind him.
“Lumos,” James muttered, raising his wand as the tip shone bright, lighting up the dusty room. Regulus stared around the neglected room, taking in the peeling wallpaper and broken furniture. He looked down at a broken chair leg by his feet. It had strange indents in it all the way down, and it looked like some of the wood had been stripped away. It clicked what this place had been used for when he saw the odd grooves in the floorboards that continued up the walls.
“Please tell me this isn’t where they put Remus when he was at school?” He asked, knowing the answer. James just nodded, swallowing thickly.
“We managed to get him out into the forest for his last few years. That’s why we’re all animagi. We figured out how to do it in fifth year. Before that, he’d just attack himself. That’s why he has so many scars.” James pointed out some long dried brown stains and patches of dust-clung silvery fur. “It was incredibly reckless, and we were total idiots for even attempting it, but it’s what was best for Remus. If we hadn’t done it, I hate to think what he would have been like.”
"Wait, you're animagi?!" Regulus questioned, his brows shooting up his head. James nodded.
"Er, yeah, sorry I thought you knew,"
"What are you?" Regulus whispered.
"A stag," James smiled widely. Just like his patronus, Regulus thought.
James led him to a door on the other side of the room. Behind it was a tunnel carved right into the earth leading away from the shack. Regulus was happy to leave that sorry little house, he could almost feel the misery there, not unlike Grimmauld Place.
He had to stoop low to get through the tunnel. James was almost on his hands and knees, he was so tall. It took them a while to get to the end of it where it opened up again for them to stand. Above his head was a narrow opening, letting in the pale moonlight from above. The moon was half full already. Where had the time gone? Soon, Sirius, Remus and the rest of the pack would be turning into deadly werewolves. He and James would have to leave the camp. He realised it wouldn’t be safe for them, well him, as he couldn’t turn into an animal at will. He found he hated the idea of James in his animal form surrounded by those twenty wolves. Maybe they could hide away in Potter Manor for the night. He could cuddle up with James again, just the two of them.
“Love?” James squeezed his shoulder gently, bringing him back to the present.
“Sorry, did you say something?” He apologised, giving his full attention to James now. He realised that James must have been calling him for a while before he found him, as he, of course, was invisible.“Yes,” James chuckled quietly. “I’ll go up and freeze the tree, and you follow once I’m out. It’ll be safer if you don’t talk once we’re up, just in case.” James then scrambled up the side of the wall, using protruding tree roots as hand and footholds, and disappeared. Regulus took the same path as James did, finding it a lot harder than James made it look, especially under the cloak.
When he finally emerged, he gasped when he took in which tree James had been on about. He’d thought it sounded weird when James had said about freezing the tree. The whomping willow towered above them, its usually flailing branches were completely still. James turned away from it and began to walk towards the castle, faintly glowing in the distance. Regulus looked up at it and felt nothing. This was the place that had managed to snatch his brother away from him, and he’d never forgive it for all the time they’d lost being at each other’s throats because some mouldy old hat had split them up and put them as far away from each other as the castle could manage. He spat on the floor glaring up at the pale stone walls, vowing after tonight he’d never step foot in it again.
Next part
#august 16#jegulus#jegulus microfic#jegulus fanfiction#jegulus fic#jegulus angst#jegulus fluff#jegulus au#regulus black#james potter#dead gay wizards#regulus arcturus black#james fleamont potter#r.a.b#jfp#albus dumbledore#fawkes#prongs#the shrieking shack#the whomping willows#hogwarts castle#hogsmeade#back to school#regulus x james#james x regulus#regulus and james#james and regulus#james potter x regulus black#what the shack was used for#regulus makes a vow
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A Chatot hums throughout the hallways of the academy, enjoying a rare and short-lived moment of tranquility. CHORD: Hrn?
Unfortunately, said tranquility comes to a halt once he looks through the window to his side. CHORD: ...What the heck is that?
Realization sets in as Chord looks closer, witnessing Nova helping themself to a delicious lamppost.
CHORD: CROOAAAARR!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! The Chatot, predictably, flips the hell out, wasting no time in running through the building at incredible speeds and making way to where Nova is. CHORD: Y-YOU THERE! You can't just climb and CHEW on the lamp post!
NOVA: Why CHORD: This is INCREDIBLY dangerous! You could get INJURED doing that, young mon! Get down from there this instant! NOVA: But This Is One Of The Posts That Make Light Right NOVA: I Just Thought It Looked Tasty CHORD: T-Tasty?! The avian is left slack-beaked for a few seconds as he tries to process what he just heard. CHORD: S-SQUAAWK! This isn't a joking matter! MAEDA: Oh, there you are, Chord!
MAEDA: I was just looking for you! CHORD: Tomoe! This is unbelieveable! This Espurr just tried to climb the lamp post, and said it's because they thought it looked TASTY! MAEDA: Oh, it's you! Nova, was it? I guess I should have expected to see you again soon. NOVA: Hi Mr. Maeda lets out a hearty laugh to the confusion of his coworker. CHORD: Er... You KNOW this one? MAEDA: Indeed, Ouka introduced me to them yesterday, as a friend of theirs. According to her, they're an amnesiac human. CHORD: ...There is NO way you actually believe that, yes? MAEDA: Hey now, Ouka is a good student. She can be a bit overexcited and is prone to day-dreaming a lot, but I am willing to at least believe this little mon is more than they appear. NOVA: I Am? MAEDA: Hehe, don't worry about it. Chord, could you please make your way to 2-B? You are up next. CHORD: O-Oh right! My apologies Tomoe, I'll go now! Chord leaves the scene hurriedly. MAEDA: You know, Nova, Chord may be a bit harsh, but he's just looking out for others. These things aren't food! Here...
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#pokemon#pokemon mystery dungeon#pmd#pmd comic#pmd nightfall#arc 1 chapter 2#nova the espurr#espurr#tomoe maeda#wigglytuff#chord the chatot#chatot
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Worriz’s Challenge
Eris perched on a rock and gazed down at the ground far below, her brow knitted with concern.
Just as she had for the last six days, she could see Wolves prowling at the base of the cliffs that the Eagles called home. Now and then, one of the Wolves would look up at her, flash a savage grin, and give a short howl. She did her best to ignore the taunts. But this was becoming a concern.
Ever since the battle for CHI had begun among the tribes, the Wolves had been encroaching on Eagle teritory.
Normally, the Wolf pack was constantly on the move. But this pack was acting like they were here to stay. They were noisy, messy, and threw loud parties late into the night so that none of the Eagles could sleep.
It might have just been a little inconvenience, except for two things: One, the Eagles needed to be able to fly down to the ground to find food, and the Wolves were making that dangerous to do. And two, it was almost time for the Eagles to get their monthly share of the powerful CHi from the Lions, and Eris was sure the Wolves were here to prevent that from happening.
if only we could find some way to make them go away, she thought. But how?
Just then, Eglor flew by. He was very excited, and kept shouting, "I've done it! 've done it!" All the Wolves looked up to see what the commotion was about.
"Shhhh!" warned Eris. "What have you done?"
But Eglor was too excited to speak quietly. "I've perfected a machine that can hurl an Eagle all the way from one end of the forest to the other, faster than any beast that runs or flies. From now on, instead of flap, flap, flap to get from one place to another, it will be zip, zip, zip!"
"Zip, zip, zip?" said one of the Wolves, laughing.
"Sounds more like flop, flop, flop to me!"
Eglor wheeled in the air and looked down at the Wolf.
"Ha! With my machine, any Eagle could outrace a Wolf by twice the speed. That's just scientific fact. There's not even the teeniest, tiniest, most microscopic room for doubt."
"Want to bet?" growled Worriz. The pack leader had wandered over to see what the rest of the Wolves were so interested in. Now he eyed Eglor with a mocking smile.
"Eglor, don't." Eris tried to hold her friend back.
"No good can come from arguing with the Wolves."
But Eglor's pride as an inventor was at stake now.
"Yes, I do want to bet!" he announced loudly.
"All right, then," said Worriz. "I'll bet you I can make it to the far end of the woods faster than any Eagle launched from your machine. If I win, you Eagles give up your share of CHI to us this month."
"And if you lose," said
Eglor, "you go away and leave our nesting area alone!"
Eris slapped a wing against her forehead. What had Eglor just gotten them into?
"Deal," said Worriz. "We race tomorrow ... That is, if you can find someone foolish enough to challenge me."
"Tomorrow?" stammered Eglor. He suddenly sounded a bit nervous. "Now, see here, the machine works— know it does—but it hasn't been fully tested yet, and there are still a few things—"
The Wolves howled with laughter. One of them said,
"You know what they say about Eagles—all flash and feathers."
"If you want to back down, bird," Worriz sneered,
"then I guess-"
"'ll do it!" Eris interrupted him. "I'll race you!"
After she had said it, she could hardly believe the words had come out of her beak. But the Wolves were getting under her feathers with all their insults, and maybe this was the one way to get them to leave their nesting grounds for good. Besides, Eglor was a great inventor. If he said his machine could make her go zip, zip, zip, then it could.
"All right then," Worriz snarled. "Tomorrow. Dawn.
Be here."
The Wolves turned to talk amongst themselves.
Suddenly, Worriz looked sharply back up at Eris. "Oh, and one more rule," he snapped. "No help from the Lions, right, Eagle? For this challenge, you fly solo."
All the Wolves laughed.
—————
"It doesn't work," said Eglor sadly. "I don't know what happened, but it's not working."
"What do you mean?" asked Eris, in shock. "You told the Wolves there wasn't the teeniest, tiniest room for doubt."
It was the middle of the night. Eglor had taken Eris to see his machine, which consisted of a catapult with a bowl at the end attached to a much bigger metal apparatus by tightly wound springs. When Eglor triggered the contraption, the bowl would be propelled forward and anything inside it would go flying... at least, in theory.
But now the inventor Eagle didn't look so sure.
"When I tested it this afternoon, it worked fine," Eglor explained. "But then I started practicing tonight with things actually in the bowl, like bunches of apples, and . .. well, look for yourself."
Eris looked. There were smashed apples splattered all over the floor of Eglor's workshop. The machine just hurled them straight down at the ground.
"So if I get in this thing tomorrow morning. . . no zip?" she asked.
"More like splat," said Eglor. "We'll have to call off the bet."
"We can't," insisted Eris. "We'll lose our CHI to the Wolves, which will hurt the balance in Chima, and the Wolves will stay down there forever! I have to win the race... somehow. I just have to."
——————
"Did you do it?" whispered Worriz.
Wilhurt, another Wolf in the pack, nodded. "It was easy. I used a bellow plant to float up the mountain and then tied it down. I got to Eglor's workshop, and broke off part of his machine. Then let the air out of the bellow plant little by little so I could float back down. That Eagle won't be zipping anywhere, boss."
"Good," Worriz said with a wicked grin. "All that Eagle CHI is practically ours. Hey, maybe we'll challenge the Bears and the Gorillas to races, too. Let the Crocs fight battles we'll get all the CHI we want the old-fashioned way: We'll cheat."
——————
By dawn, Eris had a plan ... sort of. It started with not telling Worriz the machine didn't work. The second part involved getting some help from someone she would normally stay far away from.
Skinnit the Skunk was actually a very nice animal who didn't have an enemy in the world. But no one really wanted to spend any time around him because ... well, he smelled really bad. It wasn't his fault. But no one wanted to risk keeping him company and maybe winding up smelling terribly, too. Still, Eris had always made an effort to be polite to him.
"Skinnit, can you do me a favor?" she asked, talking to him from high up in a tree.
"Me? Really? You want me to do you a favor?" Skinnit replied eagerly. No one ever asked him to do anything other than go away.
"That's right," said Eris. "It's nothing hard. I just want you to do ... that thing you do at a certain place and a certain time."
Skinnit frowned. "You mean you want me to make a stink?" he asked. That was what he did best, but it always made other animals run away. Why would Eris want him to do that?
"Just trust me," Eris reassured him. "You'll be doing something nice for all the Eagles."
"If you say so," Skinnit answered, smiling. "But you had better hold your beak—it's going to get smelly around here!"
Eris grinned. "Thanks, Skinnit," she said. "I knew I could count on you." With that, she flew off. She had a few more non-rule-breaking favors to ask of some old friends.
———————
After making a few more stops, Eris was ready for the start of the race. She perched in Eglor's lab, waiting for the signal to start. Down below, Worriz was crouched down, ready to run.
"You might as well hand over that CHI now, bird,"
Worriz called up. "It's as good as ours!"
"We'll just see about that," Eris shouted back down.
She glanced over at Eglor, and gave him a wink. The inventor Eagle looked very nervous, but he nodded back.
One of the Wolves stood at the base of the rock spire, holding a palm leaf to start the race. A moment later, he waved the leaf high in the air, and the race was on!
Eris leaped out from Eglor's lab, flying as fast as she could, so anyone looking from below would think she had been rocketed out into the sky. Worriz was running at top speed, too, hoping to put some distance between himself and the Eagle.
As she soared above the canopy of trees, Eris did her best to keep an eye on Worriz, even if she could only see him for a few seconds now and then. She knew the Wolf would would take the fastest path through the forest. In fact, she was counting on it.
In the woods, Worriz was feeling confident. The pack had blazed a new trail through the forest lately, one that made getting from one end to the other a snap. All he had to do was follow the scent the vehicles had left and he couldn't go wrong. He put his nose to the ground, took a big sniff...
... and he almost fell over! His nose was full of an incredibly horrible smell, so bad it made his eyes water.
He shook his head, trying to make the odor go away. But it didn't. It was so overpowering that now he couldn't smell anything else. Worriz knew there was only one animal in the forest who could make a smell that bad.
"Skinnit!" he howled.
Off to the side of the path, the little skunk ran away, disappearing into the trees.
"All right, I don't need my nose," Worriz
grumbled to himself. "I can remember the path .. sort of. I know there were trees ... and a big rock... and some dirt... hmm...
Worriz picked a direction that looked right and started to run again. At one point, he glanced up and spotted Eris through the trees. The Eagle was falling behind.
All he needed to do was put on an extra burst of speed and he was sure to win.
Just then, he heard an enormous rustling in the woods ahead. It sounded like a huge herd of creatures on the move. But there were no sounds of foliage tearing or ground being ripped up the way he would have expected. As he rounded a bend, he discovered why: It was a tribe of Gorillas in their massive Gorilla Machines. But instead of smashing through the jungle the way the Wolf Vehicles did, the Gorillas were being extra careful not to disturb anything as they passed.
The Gorillas' respect for nature meant that they had to move very slowly in their huge machines so they didn't accidentally trample any flowers or even weeds.
"Come on!" Worriz growled. "Hurry it up!"
Three of the Gorillas stopped right in Worriz's path.
"Hey, Wolf, why are you in such a hurry?" said the first Gorilla, looking down from the cockpit of his huge vehicle.
"Yeah, you have to savor every minute of life, the way you do a really good banana," said the second.
"Maybe you just don't see it," said the third. "You Wolves always have your noses to the ground, and you don't look up to see the sky!"
Over Worriz's protests, the Gorillas proceeded to tell him all about how much better life was when you were in tune with all of nature. Even worse, all the other Gorillas stopped to listen, nodding their heads and smiling. It felt like forever before they finally finished and moved on, their machines going even slower than before.
When the Gorillas had finally passed, Worriz ran faster than he ever had in his life. He was heading for the quick-moving river that flowed through this part of the forest. If he dove in and let the waters carry him, he could still beat Eris. Sure, he wouldn't technically be racing. But so what? The only thing that mattered to him was winning!
He was just about to dive into the river when, from behind the trees, a bunch of small figures appeared in his path. Worriz nearly skidded to a halt. He couldn't believe his eyes. Nearly two dozen teenage foxes were blocking him, all smiling and yipping and jumping up and down. Because as everyone in Chima knew, teenage foxes thought that the Wolves were the coolest animals in the forest. Especially the Wolf Pack leader, Worriz.
"Look, it's Worriz!" cried one.
"I told you he was coming!" squealed another.
"Wow, look how cool he is!"
"I just have to get his autograph! I have to!" Before Worriz knew what was happening, he was being mobbed by the teenage foxes! They were tugging at his fur, running back and forth in front of him, and begging for his signature.
"We're your biggest fans," said one of the foxes breathlessly. "You're the coolest Wolf in Chima!"
"I won," said the Eagle. "So pack up your pack and move on."
But Worriz sneered. "Ha!" he said. "That's what you think. Your Lion pals aren't here, so you can't prove you won the race. Looks like your CHI for this month is ours. Hand it over!"
Eris shook her head, a knowing grin crossing her face. She pointed up at the sky. A whole flock of sparrows was circling overhead, cheering wildly for Eris.
"I don't need the Lions to prove I beat you," she said.
"Those sparrows saw the entire race. It's over, Worriz."
Worriz smacked his head and groaned. Even with cheating, he had still lost to the Eagles! "Fine," he grumbled. "You got lucky this time. But next time, mark my words, you won't be so lucky!"
Eris chuckled. "It wasn't luck," she said as a sparrow came and landed on her hand. "Don't you know by now? I have lots of friends."
#f u tumblr for closing out the damn thing without saving#the genuinely good art in this book makes up for how frustrating it was to post this#mostly#sorry this took so long#schools almost over so I should have more time for myself#tho I do want to do more fics#I just posted a recent one right now called Teeth and Tails go check it out#every chapter will be getting a accompanying piece of art to go with it :3#I’m working on the third one right now#legends of chima#lego chima#chima#lego legends of chima#for chima#eris the eagle#worriz the wolf#lego chima eris#lego chima worriz#chima worriz#chima Eris
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Aaaand blog officially revamped, Dewey style! You're welcome!
...
I have some notes.
For one thing, that picture was taken BEFORE I knew how awful Mark Beaks is, and having that picture up there makes it look like I condone his actions, which I DO NOT.
What if I edit it to show Gizmoduck instead?
Would you? That would be AMAZING!!!!
Hey, a superhero like Gizmoduck is one hundred times better than a superfraud like Mark Beaks.
True. Another thing, I get you were going for some sort of pun with our names, but what exactly is it supposed to mean?
You see, brother, not only does it sound cool, but the meaning hails back to TV, which come together in perfect harmony to represent... ummm...
You have no clue, do you?
I do too have a clue! It represents our, uh, brotherhood!
And what exactly does it say about our brotherhood?
Why do you have to be so detail-oriented? It's just a pun! Er, a pun that represents our brotherhood, I mean. Together, we are the High-Dewfinition Adventure Crewey! Or should I say that we're the Adventure Dew-o? Eh? Eh?
I prefer Crewey. One Dewey pun is more than enough.
There are never dew many Dewey puns.
*He smirks and rolls his eyes.* The font you chose is nearly unreadable, by the way.
Oh come on! It's a great font! Do you have anything other than critism for my perfect blog layout?
One last note, and then I'll tell you what I like about it. I didn't say you could make the whole blog blue. I mean, look at my former layout. Nothing like the warmth and passion of the color red!
Oh come on! You had the whole blog red for how long? I think it could use a fresh paint of cool dew blue.
Fine, we can keep it like this. For now. Here's what I like about your blog design. It is a good header picture, besides Mark Beaks. HD Adventure Crewey is a pretty good team name. And I love the profile picture you chose for us.
And there you have it folks! Two brothers, one blog. What crazy adventures and trouble will they get into next??? Only time and following our blog will tell! Be sure to click that little heart to show how much you like the blog/me and reblog to show other people how much you like the blog/me!
*Huey raises his eyebrow.*
Me and Huey! I totally meant to say both of us.
#ooc: I don't really wanna edit Gizmoduck into the picture#pretend he's there I guess?#I am incredibly rambly and don't know how to shut up when I'm writing
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You and Your Human: Part 2
Part 1
You let yourself fall apart with your human for a few more moments before pulling yourself up. You are not helpless. You have your own ship now. You can keep yourself and your human safe. But you need a new crew. Loyal ones, who are good at their jobs and don't mind humans. Which... isn't so easy to find.
Luckily, you and your human are at one of the largest trading posts this side of the Starry Abyss. If there's anywhere you can find someone who won't much mind working with a human, it's here.
You do not actually end up finding your first crew member, they find you. In fact, they run up to you, beaming.
"Pronouns?" they say, speaking to you in your native language. You are stunned.
"Er... she/her variance?" you say.
They nod and keep speaking, words tumbling out, accent like that of a native speaker. But unless the setup of the trading posts has very much changed since your last visit, they cannot be a native speaker. They are tall, with feathered wings and puffy gray-white hair. They wear flowing white robes and their beak makes a satisfying clicking noise as they speak.
"Oh my gosh thank you so much, I'm not sure why they sent you as opposed to one of my superiors... are you working for one of the ambassadors? You know what, it doesn't really matter. Anyway, thank you for reconsidering I swear I won't let you down--"
You puff your tail up and step in front of your human. "Pronouns?"
"They/them variant."
You nod. "Excuse me, but who are you and what do you want?"
The Equilian backed up. They looked genuinely remorseful, which made you feel a bit bad.
"Oh my gosh I am so sorry," they say. They chuckle nervously, teeth retracted into their beak. "I didn't-- I have been a mess today, Saints. I'll just tangle my way out of here then...?"
They start to walk away, but you let out a high-pitched squeak, a signal to wait. You aren't sure why. Your human squeaks at you, but it has the pitch wrong and you can't tell what it's trying to say. You pat its ankle reassuringly and then turn back to the Equilian.
"How do you know Pyricese so well?" you ask. Most people do not know more than their standard language, and maybe a second one they learned at school. It is the reason why most ships are only one species, why the United Galactic Council failed so badly, and why translators are one of the most coveted resources in the Abyss. Someone like you-- who speaks nearly every language a person might need-- well, everybody wants you. It's why you have to be careful.
"I spent five years as part of an aid program, for the alliance between our two planets." Their head bounces up and down, almost like a nod, and you notice your human copying the motion. "I'm essentially fluent!"
"Aid?" you say. There is a cold spiral of dread in your stomach. You feel sick. "What happened?"
"Oh. Oh Saints you don't know."
"What. Happened." Your human is babbling comforting nonsense in the background. Normally you would be happy to hear it speaking its native language, but you are too hopped up on adrenaline right now. When you get back to your ship, you are going to have a nice hot bath and a long lie down. This much adrenaline cannot be healthy.
"It was a sandstorm," the Equilian says. "A bad one. A lot of things were destroyed, pretty soon after the alliance was formed. So they sent over aid groups to help."
"You were one of them?" you clarify. You are starting to have an idea.
"Yeah." The Equilians wings slump. Their feathers are messy, they must not have preened in a while. "Was. My contract ran out and I wasn't a citizen so... I wasn't allowed to stay."
You realize that you are leaning forward, tail perked up. You look too invested in this, you don't even know this person. You're always emotional after a breakdown. "What I am hearing," you say, recovering magnificently if you do say so yourself, "is that you are in need of a job."
"Are you offering?" the Equilian says.
Your tail shakes upwards. "I am. What can you do?"
"I'm a builder, or have been for a while, but I've always liked to think that I'm a good pilot," the Equilian says.
You smile. "It just so happens that I have acquired a new ship. And I'm not a particuarly good pilot."
The Equilians wings flap in and out. "That's-- that's great! Are you ready to go, or do you have any other business? Is there somewhere I should meet you?"
Your human is making soft muttering noises. From what you can parse, although it is difficult to follow two languages at once, it is trying to figure out what you are saying. It does not seem to be having much luck, which makes sense, you've only taught it it/its variance and this whole conversation has been in she/her and they/them variance.
"Meet me at the docks, in the crow section," you say. "I'll show you where the ship is once I get there." You do not think your pilot would steal the ship, but it is standard procedure, and you do not want to risk getting stranded, especially not now that you have a human to protect.
The Equilian nods, and flutter-walks away. You grab your human by the hand, and head off into the crowd. You have more crew members to find.
#story#story snippet#original character#writblr#second person#humans are space orcs#if anyone wants more details-- about any of this really-- send me an ask! I love talking about my worldbuilding#Part 3: Prequel Time!#you and your human
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Skylanders Trap Team Trappable Villains in a nutshell
(This was just because I was bored. Treat it like Vegetable Justice and don't be offended easy if I roast your favorite one.)
Life
Sheep Creep: The first baddie you shove in that emerald hammer, sorta like your first bug type with a pokeball.
Broccoli Guy: Useful... For everything not fighting.
Chompy Mage: Beloved old loon since 2012
Cuckoo Clocker: Where's the fighting element? No problem! Put him in life!
Shield Shredder: I guess they would've put you in tech, but all the chairs were taken.
Chompy: WHY ARE YOU DLC-
Water
The Gulper: A walking sin of Gluttony
Slobber Trap: Hey, boy! I think the Earth Element was that way.
Chill Bill: Was cool before it was cool.
Brawl and Chain: Somebody needs to give him a teddy bear, STAT.
Cross Crow: I guess water comes from your arrows...?
Threatpack: NEEERD-
Earth
Tussle Sprout: Hey, wanna swap elements with Cuckoo Clocker?
Chomp Chest: Yeaaah... That chest wasn't sus at all!
Grave Clobber: Why did you change to water in Imaginatiors...?
Golden Queen: Entitled to all the gold in Skylands, is female, and yells a lot... Is she Skylands' Karen?
Air
Buzzer Beak: Uhh... Okay.
Dreamcatcher: Oh... How she'd dream of having a better fight... Oh wait, Pain-Yatta and Hood Sickle have that? And they're in the same level as her?
Krankenstein: Are you trying to copy Jet-Vac? Is that why you're in Air?
Bad Juju: Why you don't mess with voodoo.
Tech
Bruiser Cruiser: Hey, your mech is kinda clever.
Shreadnaut: Double trouble!
Brawlrus: You gotta pick him!
Krankcase: Dude, you can take the hat off, you don't need to put that other hat ON TOP OF IT.
Trolling Thunder: How does THAT fit in the trap WITH him?!
Mab Lobs: What's with mirror people and facial hair?!
Magic
Bomb Shell: No another "Should be in tech"!
Pain-Yatta: Everything about you is great!... Expect the evolved form.
Rage Mage: Brocc but not useful.
Fire
Chef Pepperjack: How did you get into that baking contest?!
Scrap Shooter: GARBAGE DAY!
Grinnade: I'm sure Activision would've been sued if you didn't get a mouth.
Smoke Scream: Mr. "I have the best Skystone", which is better than KAOS.
Undead
Masker Mind: Green is not a creative COLOR.
Hood Sickle: I think my bestie has a crush on you.
Wolfgang: First you break others' eardrums, now you copy off of Snap Shot in Imaginators?
Bone Chompy: HOW ARE YOU NOT DLC?
Light
Eye-Five: You're lucky I'm convinced you're a living plushie.
Blaster-tron: Systems indicate: You are a very cool bot.
Lob Goblin: Not again with another "should be in tech"!
Luminious: Actually, I got nothing. You're good.
Dark
Eye-Scream: Would I need to call a dentist or an eye doctor...?
Fisticuffs: I guess you're meant to be like the Pokemon version of the Dark Ty- er, Element?
Tae Kwon Crow: WHO DARES PUT ME IN A NUTSHELL?!
Nightshade: ...Now I'm going to give the "Worst Doom Raider Fight" medal to you. And that's because I can't think of any way to fix yours!
Kaos
.... Basically the Joker, but bald, the size of a dwarf, and has nothing to do with clowns... He's a metamorphic one.
#skylanders#skylanders trap team#in a nutshell#don't take this too seriously#it's a silly post#skylanders kaos
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The garrulous Slagzogg
My response to this week’s BestiaryPosting challenge from @maniculum
A little rough this week, but wanted to get it out there (perfect is the enemy of good :p).
Jinhao shark fountain pen with fine, hooded nib, with Monteverde Raven Noir ink, over initial 5.6mm HB pencil sketch.
Process and resoning notes below the cut...
"The Slagzogg marks the watches of the night by its constant cry. No other creature picks up the scent of man as it does. There are two kinds of Slagzoggs, domestic and wild. Wild Slagzoggs fly high, in a an orderly fashion, signifying those who, far away from earthly things, preserve a rule of virtuous conduct. Domestic Slagzoggs live together in villages, they cackle together all the time and rend each other with their beaks; they signify those who, although they like conventual life, nevertheless find time to gossip and slander. All wild Slagzoggs are grey in colour; I have not seen any that were of mixed colour or white. But among domestic Slagzoggs, there are not only grey but variegated and white ones. Wild Slagzoggs are the colour of ashes, that is to say, those who keep apart from this world wear the modest garb of penitence."
Okay, we know they fly. We know they have beaks. Hence, it's pretty obvious what kind of creature this is...
A pterosaur! Er... Well, there's no mention of feathers (which is probably reasonable...), perhaps I'm just tickled by the thought of medieval domesticated pterosaurs? I probably spent way too much time trying to draw a wattle fence, too. We have a farmer feeding her flock of domesticated miniature azhdarchid pterosaurs, while a few wild slagzoggs fly high overhead, looking down on their cousins below.
I went with azhdarchid pterosaurs since I felt that would be more visually distictive, and fit better in the picture given their more upright and distinctive method of locomotion on the ground. I also love the idea of a slagzogg 'village' cackling (like the one spreading its wings on top of the fence), clacking beaks, preening themselves, and generally making noise!
We also know that 'no other creature picks up the scent of man' as well as the slagzogg... We do know at this point that the bestiary authors love their superlatives almost as much as Pokedex descriptions, but we have no reason to doubt it. So, looking at modern archosaurs with a great sense of smell... Apparently, crocodiles actually have a fairly good sense of smell, but we're looking at birds to work out how best to represent this in a creature with a beak. Now kiwis have nostrils at the end of the beak, vultures also have a great sense of smell (though they completely slipped my mind until I was most of the way through), which left me with petrels... Petrels are diving seabirds with a distinctive 'tubenose' (their nostrils form a tubular nasal passage atop the beak), and use their sense of smell to detect prey (and their colonies) at sea. It's definitely a distinctive look!
What do they use their great sense of smell for (apart from identifying their keepers, one assumes)? Maybe these are truffle hunting pterosaurs? ;)
Actually, my first thought on reading the description was the dog vultures from the Judge Dredd comics (unfortunately I can't find any pictures online), until I re-read the description and noticed the reference to beaks!
This all raises an interesting question about how I (we? I don't want to assume too much) approach these challenges.
I feel like most of the time, I'm trying very hard to approach the prompts with a completely open mind; in many ways, a lot of the fun of these challenges is seeing what designs we come up with compared to the bestiary illustrators, given the same prompts.
Occasionally I'll have a pretty good idea what the creature is meant to be, in which case I will sometimes exercise a form of 'malicious compliance' where I'm either sticking as closely as possible to the description, or more rarely pursuing a parallel direction that I know is not the 'correct' one, in order to avoid drawing anything too close to the animal I believe the prompt is referencing.
Most rarely, I just have a cool idea from the prompt (like the Blisheag) and head off in that direction instead.
Guess which one this is :D
So what I'm also learning here is that I need more practice drawing humans, and drawing pterosaurs!
As an aside, this week I discovered this site;
It's basically a giant repository of links to various images and sites relating to medieval life and culture (so for example, I looked up the links for straw hats to get some medieval straw hat references this week...). There's so many links in here that some of them will inevitably have moved or expired, but it's potentially a really good source of references! I was able to find this image (partway through drafting the drawing) that I ended up taking heavy influence from;
#maniculum bestiaryposting#bestiaryposting#my art#pterosaur#azhdarchid#art challenge#slagzogg#Slagzogg
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~ Oh So Fly! ~
From the rockin’ street doves to the coo-l Capuchines We’ll pick and peck apart every piece of bird-based bling Warmers, collars, capes… Gramma’s cornbread cowls? You might as well go back home with your head in a towel!
~ A nonsensical poem I wrote on pigeons and their Fabulous! Bread! Necklaces! for the recent "Toasty Mart" bread x animals zine hosted by @bycmykae. Thanks for the pun fun-filled experience!
Shoutout to @katsuayumu too for making all the super cute and delicious pigeon character art for this piece :D
🕊 [ Read the full poem on AO3 or under the cut! ]
🍞 [ Read the free zine via itch.io! ]
Greetings! Salutations! Birds of a feather! Welcome to the Bread Derby, sisters and brothers! The name’s Pasquale and I’m your host for today— Colomba of keen eye for fashions of the day ~✦
It’s party pigeon time down here in the square Where every-birdy’s decked in their fanciest neckwear Where the have-its flaunt it! And the have-nots want it! Where upper crusts and lower crumbs clash in showers of grit!
From the rockin’ street doves to the coo-l Capuchines We’ll pick and peck apart every piece of bird-based bling Warmers, collars, capes... Gramma’s cornbread cowls? You might as well go back home with your head in a towel!
We’ll see who’s the boss in their oven-baked best! And who’s burnt toast that’s only good for lining nests! Beaks up and b-ready, we’re starting the show Coo! Here’s our first lady—let’s fluffin’ go!
———
Behold! This uppity—I mean, blue-crowned royalty: The Duchess of Dovershire, come to visit from her county With her pearl-tipped crest as though dipped in icing And draped with a most exquisite braided bread ring Such graze! Delicacy! (Maybe a hint of power?) The air and flair of fresh-milled flour—
“How do you do? Your reds and greens are lovely!” Hold up, did... she just say something to me? Why yes ma’am, thank you! I adore them too! It’s just avocado bruschetta, nothing too frou-frou~ She chortles, nods; then away she struts: A portly, pleasant presence in her posh, plaited doughnut.
———
Kerfuffle from the crowds! Cue the world’s favourite Frillback: Pop idol Pae-Dae, in a cushy cape of flatbread Luscious curls of feathers bronze all across his wings A dishy dove indeed: he’s every fledgling’s prince! His shuffling feet pause, his misty eyes find mine I wonder what words might leave a beak so sublime...?
“Wish I could sleep, Mister Host, but I’ll do my best Ask me about the dramas I’ve been filming without rest Or how everyone thinks my wings are hazelnut flakes...” Sigh, a celeb’s life! You can’t ever get a break I’ll interview you next week! Now go and catch some Z’s Your tortilla blanket should be cosy—but don’t let your fans see!
———
An emerald dove patters by, sleeves shimmering green Donning the airiest, fairiest sourdough I’ve seen: Scored like a flower, flour dusted like a lace veil Aw, she’s proud of it! Look at her bobbing tail~ “My name’s Paige Pidgerton, I baked it just today I hope to open my artisan beak-ery someday!”
You’re a natural, miss, this here’s a work of art! But really, is that all you dream of deep inside your heart? She flusters, she flushes, her white headband askew The rosy eyes of a heroine’s fairytale come true! “Maybe... if I can’t bake for everyone in town Then at least for some-birdy I’m happy to be around.♥”
———
You hear them before you see them: Two lean, rugged doves Squabbling, squawking, crash-landing (on the) square from above “I told you to hurry, old man, now we’re late for the parade!” ‘Why don’t you stop by a corner shop again, you ingrate!’ Good day, gentlemen! I might have seen you somewhere, sir Aren’t you G.I. Low, that decorated war officer?
‘Some eye you’ve got, chap! Sharp as this one I’ve got left Better than my grandkid here who thinks he’s bloody EMS.’ “If this thumbdrive don’t reach later, I’ll be toast-er than my toast! Name’s Payload Swift, mister, I’m a racer turned pigeon post.”
(Aha! Do I sense a glorious generation gap? A question trap to set their wings and tempers aflap!) Living life in the fast lane? Your intake must be insane! Care to share with us your go-to holy grains?
“This grilled tuna sandwich melt from Leaven-Eleven’s Is the best thing since sliced bread—a taste made in heaven!” ‘It IS sliced bread, for heavens’ sake! See the junk this boy is eating? Not like this chipped beef on toast from back when I was serving It’s provisions! Nourishment! Blessings for the whole flock!’ “Yeah sure, if only you can eat it without a fork...”
———
A zig-zagging, a tango-ing, a high bird-song and dance A kererū, post-dine-and-wine, down on the bench in a trance That passé office plumage versus bland-as-heck handbag— Lady, your tastebuds are wrecked! And that fruit loaf’s a big red flag!
She waves her bottle—budget Pigeot Noir!—before my eyes “I’ve seen your shows on CooTube, you’re that real fly guy! That Nicobar fella who’s gone way up the pecking order...” Lady, your tastebuds are just fine! Ignore what I said earlier—
“Can you tell me how you’ve been eating every-birdy’s lunch? You’re now rolling in dough, but I’m just rolling off the branch... How can a common quill-pusher like me, Karolie Flee Fly to the top, eat all I want, and still be this carefree?”
Oh Miss Flee, let’s first put my inspiring haute coo-ture aside No matter what you’re doing, you should do it with pride! Push all the quills (and your bosses’ too) until you’re seen and heard But remember: there’s more to you than just this corporate bird!
Sure, your whites, greens and purples may not be the hottest stuff But if you’re a better you than yesterday then that’s good enough~★ That said, please just toss that brick of cursed candied fruit Get a loaf that tastes more chic! With marmalade to boot!
———
So there we go, folks—our roundup of this Derby: A true-blue cross-section of our bling-based society I’ve seen a future star baker, courier, wine connoisseur Stay inspiring, inspired and well rested, you youngsters!
Boast your bread-lace loud and proud, bake it till you make it The true slice-of-life is how you wear it and what you make of it! And to every-birdy else who’s stayed with us throughout— Beak thanks to you all! This is Col. Pasquale, signing out~♫
~ end ~
#toasty mart zine#zine#writing#poetry#pigeons#birbs#BREAD#art#shitpost#shitty puns#shitty trivia: i identify with the kererū best#happy reading!#contributor pieces#tangentials
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Tighnari|Event-Interested|
Hello! Thanks for being interested and willing to dedicate time. Or you’re here just curious or maybe you’re scrolling… However which way you found it does not bother me.
Above is how much I’m looking for. I’m not planning to triple crown as soon as I reach 90. Below the cut is more information. If you’re scrolling you can simply ignore. Please reblog to others. <3
Information:
Hawaii Timezone
Tighnari grinding,(only certain stuff)
7am-11pm most likely.
Taking effect on June 20th
Ends on… October 8th. Most likely.
exp books/mora/quests/commissions etc for first 20 days. Still joinable.
Uid: 63083256, Yoimiya pfp, Jean Namecard
Will I skip days? Most likely. There’s just some days where I’m too busy.
No negative stuff in chat, lmk if you don’t want to be recorded. I’ll either record others with interviews and stuff or just not record completely.
Be patient if a video does come out. It could revive my channel maybe. I’m CaramelStarlight with a Tighnari PFP.
(FateTracker)
(Active on June 20th-Oct 8th. Playing actively on 10am-11pm my time.)
NOTE: I do NOT have sassy fox boy. This is just me preparing for when he comes home. (Hopefully.)
(Lmk in comments and/or ask box. With name,uid,pfp.)
(120 days= 4 months. Aka October 8th. Those first 20 is for books and mora then the rest is actually for Tighnari where I’m getting his stuff,artifacts,ascension etc)
G A T H E R E D: •Dendro ascension •Crowns •Raiden boss drop •Nilotpala Lotuses •Mushroom drops •Talent Books N E E D •Mora •Exp books •Beaks
A R T I F A C T S (WIP) / W E A P O N 2pc wanderers troupe.(WIP) •Crit rate wanderers troupe hat -Crit dmg=12.4% |EM/DEF= +37 |HP= +568 -Lamp of the lost (DEF) •Crit dmg= +21%, 2.1% Crit rate| HP= +568| ER= +11.7% -Concerts final hour •EM +16|Crit Dmg +12.4% |ATK +18 | HP +1018 (TOO MUCHH) -Bards arrow feather •HP +508|Crit Dmg +12.4% |EM +58|ER +12.3% -The first days of the city of kings •EM +65 | ER +5.2% | Crit Dmg +14% | Def+42|
Weapon: Hanayumi, r2 Stringless or Ibis piercer r3.
#sumeru#dendro#tighnari#genshin impact#tighnari x reader#genshin tighnari#Genshin Tighnari#Tighnari#event#tighnari genshin
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Take some videos of glitch Pokemon like missingno to show us their “true forms” (show us what the invisible bits look like), or see what those broken hit box items look like under it?
[A VIDEO IS UPLOADD AT 7:30 PM ON 7/28/24 * Video begins outside, in what appears to be a back yard in PT town. The familiar buzz of static accompanies the beginning of the video as the camera is set up. On Camera Simon appears to have a red outline tracing the entirety of his body. It conforms to his body for the most part, but diverges around his right arm, where it starts to become erratic, not quite lining up with where his arm is meant to be, and bending and pitching in spots. Simon- Okay, it looks like it's rolling. Hi there anon! This is a great question, and I'm going to answer it right here. Zee- And I'm here to help! * From behind Simon, Zee, the pink clad oddity hunter can be seen flashing her trademark winning grin. If a voice could make a 'sparkling' effect, Zee's would do it. Her red 'hitbox' outline appears to be rather normal, not diverging from her body at all. Simon- So, of course not every glitch pokemon has an abnormal hitbox. Of the ones I raise, there are really only a few with divergent collision. But that's why I asked Zee to come out here with her Deinglitch, Basillio. Zee can you do the honors? Zee- Of course! Come on, Silly!
A very small, Deino like pokemon bounds forward into frame of the camera. It has a deep purple coat, and what appears to be two static like wings that protrude from its body. It appears to have a strangely striped hitbox, that doesn't line up much at all with its physical form. While it vaguely follows its outline, it's clear this pokemon is not as solid as it appears to be. Its wings have a very erratic line around them that flickers in and out of view randomly. Simon- Basillio here you can see has a really interesting hitbox. It's pretty clear it doesn't line up with his body. But you can see these jagged edges that make it easy for him to clip right through a solid object and phase right through it.
Zee: Silly's a girl, Si Guy.
Simon: ah- sorry Silly. But.. er-.. here as a demonstration. If I position Silly next to this gate here. It's got a pretty solid hitbox, so if Silly just rushes at it, she's probably not going through it.
He moves to gently coax Basilio next to the gate. As he'd indicated, the pokemon can press against it, but doesn't seem able to pass through it. Simon- But if she were to, say, have a reason to want to get to the other side, like say.. a treat?
Zee flashes a grin as she steps behind the gate and holds up a Pokemon treat. Immediately smelling food Basilio rushes headlong right into the gate and after a bit of pushing clips right through. Zee: Good girl, Silly! Come to Mommy!
Simon: As you can see, she slips right through based on the angle that she impacts the gate. Now, as a point of comparison, we can look at Eve, my Missingno.
* He releases a rather large, black and white feathered Missingno from it's pokeball. Immediately its clear on camera that there is more to this pokemon's form than what is visible. The outline of a pair of eyes and a lightly hooked beak can be seen on its usually blank face, and its thin, clawed legs can be seen as well, no longer giving it the appearance of it floating in mid air. Simon- As you can see, Eve's body appears much more clearly when on camera. You can see where her legs and beak are meant to be, and some of her more unique facial features, like the slight hook to her beak. * As he talks Eve starts to slowly approach the camera, head tilting, a gleam in her eyes. She has found something that could be HERS and she desires it! Simon seems to pick up on this and quickly recalls her to his pokeball. Simon- Ah, and maybe that's enough of Eve, come back! * He swiftly recalls Eve to her pokeball as Zee chuckles at him from behind.
Simon: Anyway that's really about the strangest Hitbox abnormality that can be observed on any of my pokemon. Like I said, not every pokemon has abnormal collision. Just like as you can see, Zee's collision here lines up perfectly with her sprite.
Zee: Wouldn't it be fun if I had an odd hitbox too? Might make going to the gym a bit harder though.
Simon: Hm... I'm not sure.
From off camera �aver can be heard chiming in, "Rascal!". Simon: Oh! Right! Rascal has an odd hitbox! I should show him too!
He tosses another pokeball, this time revealing Rascal, the great golden 94. It stares wide and wild eyed at the camera and lets out a loud 'Wark'! It sounds like Rascal is in a mood today. Of what can be seen of Rascal's hitbox it appears to be flickering in and out of view, as if its entire body were only actually there half of the time. As it stares at the camera, however, the picture starts to tear, Rascal's image swiftly becoming overtaken with static. Simon: Er... Okay maybe not today Rascal! I think that's enough, ah-! Simon very quickly recalls Rascal to its pokeball, and the video feed swiftly cuts out. END OF VIDEO FEED]
Camera is ok! No need to worry about that!! But Rascal did deliver a bit of a near miss there. Heh. I guess Zee and may be having a battle anyhow though. Hopefully this goes better with OUR Zee, heh.
-Simon
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Ride West, Young Chocomate!
Day 01 - Steer
ARR (2.0) - Lv 20. My Little Chocobo
CW: Animal Death, Trauma based PTSD
Having just gotten her birder license. Yujo attempts to befriend her new chocobo companion.
Yujo yelped as she landed back first on the soft sands of Central Thanalan. Her chocobo, without warning, came to a stop and threw her off just as he ducked over to inspect the ground. She got up with a groan, dusted herself off, and looked at the bird as it pecked at the ground.
"Oh, honestly, Chocomate!" she said, shaking her head before walking towards the bird- who was still far more interested in the invisible plate of bird seed in front of him than anything the puny animate sack of popotos had to say- and grabbed the reigns.
The belah'dian jennet took one good look at the lalafell, quacked out a dismissive "kewh", and went back to inspecting the ground.
An exasperated sigh escaped Yujo's mouth. She knew that Mimigun, the Immortal Flame's stable hand, had warned her that Chocomate- as Yujo had christened him- was one of the more disruptive chocobos in the ranch and she only got him because he was the last jennet they had available but one look at the bird immediately had her in tears and insisting that he was perfect.
All she could see in Chocomate was Bokko.
The chocobo she befriended all those years ago back home on Spira.
Her friend.
The one who shielded her at the cost of his life from the wave, created from Dalamund's shattered form dashing the land of Eoreza, that devastated Spira during the Calamity.
The chocobo she couldn't bring herself to send with the rite of Yunalesca's prayer and instead had to watch as her mother did it in her stead and he faded away into a swam of pyreflies.
The sight of the pryerflies, the butterfly like fragments of aether that broke off from beings with corrupted or otherwise damaged aether in their death, still made her stomach lurch because of that day.
It wasn't fair. She knew it wasn't fair to try and imprint her memories of her friend onto Chocomate, and she still did it.
Coming to the realisation the she was being a heel. She looked at her feet for a moment before she walked up the Chocobo.
"Chocomate," she said, commanding the bird's attention.
He looked at her, if only because he had nothing better to do.
"I know we've only just met and all, but…"
Chocomate tilted his head as the lalafell tried to think about the right words to say.
"…I want to…"
The bird yawned as Yujo tried to sort out her feelings.
She closed her eyes and shook her head. "We are going to be partners. OK? So, what I want- would 'like' to do- is to ride you. I want to try riding you down to that bar down there."
She pointed to the lone building in the desert, The Coffer & Coin. A favourite haunt of adventurers.
Carefully, Yujo approached the Chocobo and placed her hands on his beak. She said nothing, hoping that she could communicate her want to the bird without words.
Chocomate took a moment to consider what the lalafell said to him. Understanding the talk of the two legged folk was a sensation that was new to the bird. In spite of not knowing word one of common- as was the case with all chocobos- he somehow understood, in his own birdish way, what the lalafell was saying to him.
After thinking it for a moment he lowered his head and body and allowed the lalafell on.
A small sense of relief washed over Yujo and she carefully got onto the bird who whistled a tune before lifting its head and body.
Yujo leaned in, "You see the building, Chocomate?"
Understanding what the lalafell meant. He whistled again.
"Let's try going to that. Just to get to know each other, OK?"
Another whistle.
Yujo took a breath to get herself ready before she pulled the reigns.
Taking immediate offence to the motion, the chocobo squawked and turned around to look at her with the closest thing to disdain that he understood.
"Oh, er. Sorry. I… I guess you don't like that, huh?"
Chocomate squawked again. He had enough of being rough-handled by those brutes back in that place with the snow and the jerks in the warm place so he was absolutely putting his claw down with this sack of popotos.
A pang of shame overtook Yujo. She had been following the instructions she had gotten when she went through the training to get her licence but she also knew for a fact that she was dealing with a living being with their own wants and desires.
"I'm sorry." Yujo apologised, rubbing the back of the birds nape, an act that had always calmed Bokko down.
Somehow understanding the popoto sack's feelings- and quite liking this new senstation, thank you very much- Chocomate chirped and started to trot slowly.
Yujo bounced up and down off the saddle. She was not used to riding a chocobo like this. For one thing Bokko was, as far as anyone could tell, a through-bread and would have been ridden by a huyr if he was bread for that sort of thing. This meant riding him was less telling him where to go and more being shoved into his plumage and being taken to where he thought was important.
As the pair made it to the bridge at the bottom of the hill, Yujo slowly gripped the reigns and lightly pulled the right side to get Chocomate to turn. Understanding without a second though, the bird turned, allowing for safe passage across the bridge.
A rush of excitement shot through Yujo, causing her to laugh. "That's it!" she said, allowing herself to go of the reigns with her hand so she could pet Chocomate's nape.
The bird chirped a song in response, its earlier misgivings seemingly giving way as he and the lalafell rode on towards the tavern. This song lasted the entire trip, which wasn't too arduous given the average stride of a chocobo, even one going at the relatively slow speed he was going, meant the trip took all of ten minutes.
The pair slowly made it to the tavern and Chocomate finished his song. He squawked out another kewh and lowered himself to allow Yujo off.
"That's a good boy, Chocomate." Yujo said as she tied the reins to the watering hole. "I'm going to just be a moment, OK?" she said before she went into the tavern.
The chocobo was now alone to think his birdish thoughts. He still wasn't quite sure what to make of the sack of popotos. She seemed nicer than the other two legged sorts, and shorter than most, but she still was one of them so he didn't quite feel that comfortable with her just yet.
As he was thinking his thoughts and drinking at the trough. A squad of tanned thugs rode in, their leader a woman in padded armour riding a purple plumed chocobo. They looked at the unsuspecting Chocomate with his neophyte Immortal Flames barding and sneered as they drew a sinister plan upon him.
To Be Continued.
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