#get flashbanged idiot

[tinnedmarlin]

FULL BRIGHT

[bravecrab]

Can't help but imagine some poor bastard in Hyrule finding a dazzlefruit for the first time, taking a bite, and getting flashbanged in the face.

[joelemmons]

gneeperton

[fyllophobia]

never knew what hit him

[betweenblackberrybranches]

Okay ready with the sketches of the next automaton au comic update

Yay

Now the actual work begins...

[yankee-in-wyndon]

Magic anon, a smiting, your fine though it's just light and sound

[automatic audio recording]

"huh?"

There's the sound of something metallic hitting the floor, followed by a loud noise.

"FUCKIN' HELL!!!"

[tahnisreu]

if any of ya'll wanna ever co-op in fop you're more than welcome to add me : heartonpins (PSN)

[chryzuree]

well, that post i made right after i woke up from my nightmare is unreadable. thanks for playing along, everyone

[yurischolar]

My mom did this to our old lady by accident...sea urchin....

[atypi-cals]

I feel like there's some sort of demon clinging to my shoulder causing my insomnia...

[mikaorangeart]

I call this one "CMYK" aka "I can't believe I managed to do this in a single afternoon" aka "get flashbanged idiot lol"

No readmore this time. You're watching the timelapse whether you like it or not

[aurae-rori]

DR RATIO ANALYSIS: PART 2, ELECTRIC BOOGALOO

SPOILERS FOR 2.1 CONTENT.

Now, you might be saying - "Aurae, you already did one, why do you need a second?" And my answer is, "LORD, I FORGOT TO TALK ABOUT HOW HIS DEFINITION OF 'IDIOT' IS DIFFERENT. AND ALSO HE DOES NOT HATE AVENTURINE NOR DOES HE THINK AVENTURINE IS STUPID." Once again, here is my disclaimer - although I have been researching psychology for a solid six years, I am NOT a professional. (I will be, one day. Just you wait, just youuuu wait-) So understand that everything I say has been analyzed with personal judgement, with my own conclusions, come to with logic and my personal interpretation. This is just what I have concluded, and you are always free to disagree.

This is my legacy. To be an analyzer. So let's go.

Okay, now that my disclaimer is over, let's take off Ratio's plaster head and chuck it into the sea, and see - what does he mean by 'idiot'?

This will be much shorter than my last, so don't worry - I will not be flashbanging you with another 4k words. This is more like a follow up, than anything else, because there's a few things I wish to touch on.

Dr. Ratio doesn't hate idiots in the sense that he hates people that have 'low IQ' or are 'stupid' in terms of being 'slow to understand'. I definitely touched on this in my last analysis, but he hates people who take their education for granted and don't go places with the gifts that they've been given. He hates "idiots" - "narrow minded" people who have the capabilities to do more and perceive more than they choose to do. People who deliberately look away or take what they know and what they could do for granted. He wants to open people's eyes and allow them to see life from multiple different angles and he believes that everyone should have a chance to learn - with the whole "knowledge for everyone" thing he's got rolling.

He wears a plaster head around people he doesn't seem to know too well in order to think more, or so that he doesn't have to see the faces of the people he dislikes. Pretty good roast. However, he does NOT wear that plaster head around Aventurine. Let's listen to the doctor's judgement - Aventurine is far from stupid. Although he likes to chalk up a lot of the things he does to his own luck, he is an INCREDIBLY capable individual who's managed to get this far because of his own form of genius. He's a man who relies on chance and good fortune, yes, but his charm, his way of scheming, and the way that he's good with people? That's skill. A talent he doesn't take for granted. Dr. Ratio respects him for this - because despite the fact that he has no proper education, he has his eyes wide open to the world and doesn't take shit for granted. He learns what he can in order to survive and he does it fucking well - Aventurine is a very smart man. He's observant, quick on his feet, and great at going with the flow and thinking in the moment.

Aventio aside, I actually believe that Dr. Ratio would be a really good teacher to those who struggle. He's patient where it's needed to be, even if he's got a quick temper, and I believe in his pursuit for knowledge he would do his best to go out of his way to find strategies that would work for their individuals. We're all unique, and he's aware of this - and because he wants to allow people to think for themselves, whatever helps the individual works. Depression? He's got a psych degree, I'm sure bro could give you some strategies. Autism? He has a touch of the 'tism himself. ADHD, and not feeling organized? Bro will help you. It's canon that he's a great fucking teacher - those who finish his classes go on to become successful people who are intelligent and critical thinkers. Round of applause for Ratio, the man that kins my father. He's shit at emotions, but great at knowledge.

Also, on that note, I believe that he would most likely hate parents that push thier "gifted" students to the limit without any compassion for the person that they really are. He's most definitely got some of that academic trauma so I believe that bro holds a secret disdain for parents who just use their children to gain more recgonition. Well, not so secret. He'd cuss them out. (Ratio please cuss out the horrible parents.)

Dr. Ratio, the Teacher ever. (Hey, maybe he'd get along with Kunikida...)

Also, I am definitely planning on making a fic where he teaches Aventurine Latin. As long as you're eager to learn and willing to look past the chalk being thrown, he's got a place for you.

Thanks for coming to my tedtalk. I did not read this through, so this is not edited. Take my unedited rambles.

[teecupangel]

I had this unhinged crossover idea, Desmond getting yeeted into left 4 dead. Consider this like a really, really late Halloween thing.

I hadn't thought too much on how things would play out for Desmond but all I know is he fucking hates it, he's thought he hated being the main target for Abstergo? Oh he's gonna hate the undead despite feeling a bit of sympathy for them.

I mean, the green flu appeared to have started slowly before things spiraled out of control continuing to evolve and further spread, and the next thing people knew, their loved ones were dropping like flies only to rise once more and begin just attacking out of nowhere. Heartbreaking to him but now his fight for survival just got worse, there's no innocents anymore, and survivors who were once kind and generous are now willing to kill other survivors just to stay safe and get supplies.

He did find some of the saferoom wall writing hilarious though, if he found a marker he totally adds his two cents in.

Absolutely hates the special infected, avoiding witches? He can manage that unless some idiot startles her, first encounter he had was not fun- he swore his heart stopped for a second hearing the witch screech. And don't get him started on the hunters, they boggle his mind and make him internally rage. Of all special infected, he's 100,000% certain if he drops and all he'd end up a hunter, and that thought terrifies him above all else.

Like, could you imagine that? Hunter!Desmond would be a freaking menace, and unlike other hunters who aren't all that silent due to his training and bleeding effects, his stealth goes above and beyond what the typical hunter is capable of. Nightmare fuel for sure.

Well, this is obviously a very late Halloween thing because I just answered this today XD

I have fond memories of L4D as it was the game me and my friends would play between classes if we were quite bored. I even play Back 4 Blood with my friend a few months back just to get back to that L4D feel (and also because it was one of the few games we both had that we could play together hahahaha).

Out of all the infected, I prefer being the Hunter so there’s definitely some bias when I say that I agree with you that Desmond would definitely be the worst kind of Hunter.

Made for stealth and speed, compounded by his unique genetics that makes him the closest Isu among the humans if we don’t count the Sages.

He wouldn’t just be a Hunter, he’d be a mutated Hunter.

One might even call him the Apex Hunter.

His vision would stay in a heightened state of Eagle Vision, unaffected by flashbangs or any kind of tools that might impede his visions or other senses.

The heightened state of Eagle Vision meant that not even walls can hide his preys and he has… ‘favorites’, one might say.

The Apex Hunter would prioritize hunting and turning specific humans.

Humans that would turn into Hunters as well, joining him with some kind of strange pack-like intuition.

To the humans, it would seem random and they won’t realize it but the Apex Hunter…

He turns those that glowed bright to him.

Those with higher Isu genes that the rest.

And it is those nightmares that plague Desmond’s sleep.

It makes him fear being infected.

Not that it was easy for him to be infected.

He wore a mask to cover his face and lessen the chance of being hit by blood or any kind of body fluids from those he takes down. He goes to the nearest museum and ransacks their historical weapon and armor displays, going for the chainmail and leather armor instead of a full metal armor. It was as light as he could get it while offering the necessary protections as he sometimes has no choice but to get into close combat with them.

He goes for weapons his Bleeds are familiar with, a hunting bow for stealth kills that wouldn’t alert the hordes, a sword with the nearest weight to what he was familiar with, a hunting dagger that he uses more as a utility tool than anything else and an emergency pistol he got from an undead police officer he took down.

He kept his identity a secret. There was no need to tell everyone he was Desmond Miles, not when he’s not sure yet if Abstergo had already been wiped out or if they’re not behind the scenes, protected by the best security money can buy.

He woke up alone, in a room that had enough clues for him to figure out that he was about to be dissected (or vivisected since he wasn’t dead yet).

No clues on where the Assassins were.

If there were even Assassins left.

All he knew was that he woke up and the world had turned into a post zombie apocalypse.

So he continues to travel, focusing on the rooftops to traverse and only making contact with other survivors when it was necessary (or if his kindness gets the better of him).

He does not give a name.

But his existence is whispered regardless.

The White Hood.

A man clad in a white hoodie with a blank mask that covers his entire face.

You know when you see him because…

His white clothes do not have a speck of blood at all.

[definitelynotstable]

Matching [Ghost x fem!Reader]

AN: My essay is due tomorrow at 5pm and I still haven’t started. I’m really trying my luck here. 

Synopsis: You and your Lieutenant manage to get matching wounds. A certain Scottish sergeant finds it amusing. Word count: 930 Warnings: Canon compliant violence, blood, guns, field medicine etc Ghost x fem!reader (callsign Red): No explicit romance but the chemistry is there babes. Veeeeery slight angst but mostly fluff. 

[][][][][][][][][][]

“You’re an idiot,” the Lieutenant gritted out as he tore your pant leg. If you hadn’t been so out of it you might’ve found it hot.

“Save the lecture for later, LT.” You groan as he wraps his belt around your upper thigh, pulling it tight as a makeshift tourniquet. “Suffering enough as is, yeah?”

He mutters something intelligible under his breath, shaking his head as he gives the belt one last tug. You hiss in surprise, batting weakly at his firm grip. He defends himself easily, shoving your arms back against your sides.

“Hold still,” he growls sternly and you still your wriggling. His eyes sharp and hard. No room for argument. 

Bullets thud and ricochet off of the crate the Lieutenant has dragged you behind. Happy with the tourniquet, he settles you against the wall, leg stretched out in front of you. 

“Stay.”

You scoff at the order but do as he says. Ghost turns his back to you, inching forwards to fire a round back at the hostiles. There’s a yell and a thump. The constant fire ceases. The Lieutenant edges around the crate, gun poised. 

“Bravo, this is Ghost. Main atrium is clear.”

“Copy, LT. We heard disturbance through Red’s comms, you seen her?”

You reach for your comms before the Lieutenant has a chance to reply. “I’m with the LT, nothing major, Gaz.”

Ghost scoffs, you glare at him. 

“Copy that, Red. Moving in now, LT.”

Ghost nods, hand against his ear. “Copy. We’ll cover you.”

You press your hands against the cool brick behind you, stumbling to your feet. You grab the ACR leaning against the wall next to you, slinging it over your shoulder. 

“Think you’ll last, sergeant?” The Lieutenant’s eyes are questioning, watching as you limp over to his side. He’d call EXFIL if you even gave him the slightest indication you couldn’t soldier on. 

So you grin, giving the stoic man a clap on the back. “We’ve got a terrorist to catch, LT.”

[][][][][][][][][][]

The Lieutenant’s pace is fast and unwavering. Bodies fall and bullets ping as you clear the hallways of the compound, providing cover for Bravo team who were attempting to secure the HVT. 

“On my six, Red.” Ghost barks, sending a round into the second atrium. The room is teaming with hostiles. Your leg throbs with a heartbeat of its own but do as your asked while the Lieutenant readies a flashbang. He lobs it into the room, ducking around the corner to take cover. You step past him, firing a couple of rounds at the flailing hostiles. 

A classic stun-’n-gun. 

Ghost joins you, providing cover as you together clear the room. 

“Bravo this is Red,” you pant in exertion, pressing a gloved finger to your comms, “second atrium is clear, copy?”

“Copy.” Soap’s accent is strong as he responds, “Target acquired, heading to EXFIL now.”

You raise your hand to reply when you catch a movement out of the corner of your eyes, a hostile on the floor fumbles for his gun. Someone barrels into you. Pain flares through your leg you hit the ground. You manage to send a bullet into his skull, the man slumps back, dead.

Ghost groans from where he lies atop you. You grit your teeth, shoving him over. “Christ, LT. Buy a girl a drink first.”

The Lieutenant huffs, clutching at his leg. “Noted.”

You notice the crimson soaking his right thigh, swearing under your breath and ignoring the pain in your own leg, you bat his hands away. Loosing your belt, you work it up his leg; just as he’d done for you earlier. 

“Eager to match, hm?” You joke, pulling the belt tight around his upper thigh. Exactly where his own belt sat on your own leg. Ghost doesn’t make a sound but his jaw clenches beneath his mask. The blood flow slows and you sigh.

“Fuckin’ hell.” He breathes, clambering to his feet, “Johnny’ll have a right laugh when he sees us.”

You nod, breathing sharply as you put pressure on your leg. Ghost takes note immediately, kneeling back at your side. He grips the belt around your own thigh, meeting your eyes with a questioning gaze. You bite your lip but give him quick jut of your chin. The Lieutenant gives the make-shift tourniquet a sharp yank and you yelp, grasping his shoulder to prevent yourself from falling over. 

“Sorry,” he mumbles, squeezing your calf for a second before dusting off his hands and returning to his feet once again. 

“Don’t worry about it, LT,” you assure him with a quick quirk of your lips, “matching, remember?”

[][][][][][][][][][]

Soap’s guffaw as he spots you both stumble towards the heli is music to your ears. 

“Now this’ll be a good story,” he chortles, racing over with Gaz who wraps an arm behind your back. Soap deposits Ghost in the seat opposite you, kneeling at the Lieutenant’s side as Gaz kneels at yours - a medkit open beside them. 

You sigh, resting your head against the rattling metal of the chopper as it starts its ascent. Your tired eyes meet Ghost’s, his cobalt irises twinkling. The Lieutenant pulls his mask up slightly, revealing his smirking mouth.

“Told you,” He mouths before yanking it back down, mirroring you and leaning back as Soap cuts away at his pant leg. 

You roll your eyes but can’t stop the tired smile from settling over your lips.

[][][][][][][][][][]

Masterlist

[its-a-me-mango]

Hello hai! You're such a cool SMG4 artist and I love Mango! Bro is just a Mario duplicate that's got a PHD and a job, I love them for that <3

Anyways, I thought of a funny little scenario between Hexsy and Mango, where when he's doing a check-up on her, they scare her pretty bad by grabbing it suddenly, so she accidentally FLASHBANGS him with the light on the end of it

*drops art and runs like a maniac into the sunset*

KTXYKHLFHLCCHLCHKDCHKKGSKXHLH I LOVE THISSSSS, GET FLASHBANGED IDIOT!!!!! THIS IS SO GOOD HEXSY IS SUCH A COOL CHARACTER, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS I ALWAYS LOVE SEEING MANGO INTERACT WITH OTHER CHARACTERS SO THIS RULES!!! THANK YOU, HEXSY FLASHBANG THIS MOTHER FUCKER AGAIN LCHKXGXYKIXTHKXGKCYCYOIT

[cryptic-bee]

yknow what Tumblr. you guys can have this thing I accidentally made. Get flashbanged, idiot.

putting the exploding one down here because it's fast and made my head hurt a lil when staring at it too long. smile