#genuinely believed id dreamt this show up

[witchofthemidlands]

seeing that she is trending reminded me that the first character of gwendoline christie's i ever saw was when i was twelve in the most surreal show called wizards vs aliens, that i ended up watching after severe dental work. i did not know i was gay at that point so i just thought that i really ‘admired’ the beautiful alien she played but no, as it turns out, i had a crush on said alien.

[theunconcernedembalmer]

ok i got the aesvic out of my system now time to pick apart the letter n why i wont really be following aesops diary exactly here. literally no one asked but i wanted to get my thoughts down somewhere cos i have. a lot

just gonna put a quick rundown of aesops diary entry as a refresher (mostly for myself so i dont miss anything): he dreamt that he was helping jerry with what was probably a murder n was affirmed n he thinks its a sign congratulating him on carrying out his duty. over the years, he carries out his duties as an undertaker n comes to the manor looking for a “fresh start” aka what sounds like his first victim. according to aesop, said victim should be quiet, n potential victim number 1 is victor. something about badly needing him to become his “silent friend” n he mentions he’ll get to wick n the 2 other survivors in due time, but for now he’s very eager to start his “mission”.

im generally okay with the letter (i have seen so many fights over this aha) cos there is no surprise he wants to kill ppl (ppl who r fighting over this point. did u even read his deductions?? guy happily killed his mentor??). but i didnt quite like the fact that he still looks up to jerry (although. i guess thats valid i just. dont like it). i was also initially kind of confused about the real reason why he would want to kill ppl since as u progress through the letter it sounds less like he kills for duty (cos of the whole dream thing at the start) but more “because i want to :)”, which is an okayish edgy kinda take imo. like not that u cant characterize aesop as Kill Kill Murder Die, but i kinda find that. pretty boring in the long term.

im just gonna put what my original take on aesop was, like all of it. first off, he hates jerry. u cannot tell me a psychotic serial killer like that can raise a child without emotional trauma. like any child, this isnt even counting the extra damage done because hes autistic. (n i also hc that aesop has read his moms letter to him at some point, n he should have come to the conclusion that it was somewhat also jerrys fault, whether through logic or denial that his mom would want to leave him, so that just adds to it.) but as much as he hates him, his teachings are the only ones hes been exposed to, n its been so ingrained in him since young so even if he hates jerry he would still subscribe to whatever twisted ideology jerry was feeding him, which ill get to in a sec.

going through his accessories, he has that origami that he folds for each of his clients, n it shows that underneath it all, aesop is still kind. this isnt expected of him n its definitely not part of his job scope as an embalmer. he (still?) has the heart to wish the best for those that have departed n takes the time n effort to fold one for each n every client he sends off, which is probably a lot. so going off on that, my hc is that jerry, being the manipulative asshole that he is (who probably definitely manipulated his mom into indirect suicide) probably used his kindness against him to make him believe that by murdering ppl he is helping them, framing all of his serial kills as a sort of mercy kill (like his mom). so the thing that aesop takes away from all this is the very twisted logic that by killing ppl he is helping them, therefore being a good embalmer and a good person in general. n everyone wants to be a sort of good person, or at least for aesop that is part of his job description to be a good embalmer. n we all know aesop is very serious about his job.

i also hc that he has killed several ppl between killing jerry n coming to the manor, cos i follow the story that he took the invitation from that poor lady n thats how he ended up at the manor. surely the lady didnt come to him right after jerry died?? but anyway, the way i see it is that he thought he liked to kill. like he finally truly understood why jerry kills so much (which is interesting now that i think about it. guy really just went along with all those murders without truly believing huh), because it felt good to kill. at least thats what he thought, the revelation that killing felt good n is good, but i say its because he hated jerry, n offing someone u kinda hate should probably feel pretty gucci. n its also so much easier to pick clients off the streets than in the manor, so i would think that he has killed ppl like his mentor did, but each time he did the great feeling that came with ending ppls life just. wasnt as good as the first time round. it just became a sort of normal satisfaction of a successful embalming.

this can go two ways: 1. he keeps on killing to try to find that great feeling again, which is cool i guess (n probably what canon would want, except canon states that he hasnt killed since jerry), but id like to go with 2. he just stops because jerry isnt around to enforce it whenever he isnt feeling up to psychoing someone to their death (which is probably how jerry got his victims, n damn if that doesnt take a lot of mind games that i dont think aesop has the mental capacity for since half of it is fighting with his social anxiety n other issues. dealing with alive strangers?? no thanks?? i doubt he would have learnt properly how to lure in clients as efficiently as jerry because of this, mostly cos he was only needed for the murder afterparty aka embalming n funerals). n as much as he stays professional, there is no. professional way of gaslighting someone to their death.

(n also since ppl have pointed out that his twitter replies n other kinda informal stuff have shown that aesop does have reverent respect for life, which also adds to him not being so blindly bloodthirsty as implied in the letter. i dont really see the twitter replies as very canon, but it does make sense that he would come to revere life with his unique take and obsession over death, for one cannot exist without the other)

so this leads me to the motive that aesop brings to the manor, at least how i see it. he isnt exactly coming to the manor to kill per se (like from the very early story, he came to the manor to return the letter to a relative of the deceased lady, something about respecting her last wishes. something like that, its really been a while since i saw that exerpt), so like killing ppl isnt his main purpose of visit. its more of hes always on the lookout for weaker (or at least those that take less mind games to kill) people to mercy kill, n it just so happens that he knows the manor n his mentor almost died from there, so theres a pretty good chance he can find some ppl that fall into this category n so it just so happens that he also has a job to do there. its still counted as a Job for him since no ones gonna tell him that embalmers dont actually. murder. 

so in my version, aesop only tries to sway ppl that he knows he can convince, n these ppl would typically be those very sickly ones like his mom (andrew im looking at u) or those with an actual death wish/ very weak will to live. but here aesop is choosing his “first victim”, and the criteria for that is... quiet? never mind “not evading him” and “not cranky” being on the list too, but that isnt quite what i was expecting from someone so dedicated to their duty of murder. sure he wants an easy first kill, but like. i dont think its consistent if his motive was really to continue jerrys bastard legacy. especially when the next paragraph is essentially him gushing over victor, that... sort of implies something else. or at least in the way i see it, since i believe that canon wants us to think that aesop just really loves to kill.

aesop likes victor. very much so. so much till he wants to kill him. which i guess makes sense cos he likes death, n now he likes victor. so he just. puts the two things he likes together. whats better than victor? dead victor. anyway the rest of the letter is more like “whatever, i technically should kill the others too but my priority is victor” so like. he confuses his (dare i say) yandere tendencies with his duty since the end goal for both is a body in a coffin.

having said that. i know i have aesvic brainrot but i also know this is one sided as hell (at least from the letter alone, not counting the letter shaped cookies in his birthday art that apparently belonged to victors birthday cake aha) n lowkey alarming since. the goal is to kill victor. i kinda want to interpret it as him genuinely wanting to be friends with victor (really wanting him to be a “silent friend”, maybe cos he doesnt actually know how to be friends with living ppl n is better with dead ones? therefore victor should be dead to be friends?) but not knowing how to n throwing in his obsession with death ends up with. this minor disaster waiting to happen. but i uh. dont know if this is valid. its valid to me at least, with my original interpretation of aesop. n again cos of his ingrained professionalism, he also kinda sees this as part of his job to send ppl off, so its another plus. not for victor, tho.

idk if ill add this yandere side in my aesop. i mean my boi has technically tried to kill victor multiple times in the past HAHAHAHA. maybe like sometimes he can be a bit obsessive. as a treat. but generally nah cos thats definitely gonna end up in a murder somewhere somehow n i cant. just kill victors here on the ask blog scene lashjflkjhdlfkjhas

so yeah that kinda takes care of the last part of the letter, as for the first part. as much as aesop hates jerry, i would also think hes pretty starved for affirmation (like i said jerry isnt going to be a good parent figure ever) n i guess it makes sense if the only times jerry has ever complimented him was aiding him in his kills n hiding the evidence, which might (?) add to his desire to kill (but that probably dies with jerry aha). so the way i see it as aesop is getting affirmation n takes it as a good sign instead of. remotely liking jerry. idk if im stretching it a little but i really dont like the take where hes okay with jerry. anyway we are ignoring that he hasnt killed before entering the manor cos that doesnt quite make sense to me (i wasnt dreaming about the letter from a lady stabbed in the face 36 times or so right???? right???????)

im also not like. trying to defend him, im just trying to make sense of his diary. boi has issues n is a little too far gone (not as far as canon tho), in my take very deluded in his way of showing kindness. literally cool motive still murder (or in canon, just murder?), please get therapy. but i just dont really like the direction that the letter was originally trying to imply, with him really just hell bent on murder without like. a clear motive (at least to me it isnt very clear since the last part really doesnt sound consistent with his supposed intentions). i mean i love being edgy with aesop every now n then but i dont think it would make for meaningful characterizations in the long run so. ill still be sticking with my original take on aesop with maybe a bit of yandere for victor cos thats always fun

[fulltimereviewer]

50 Best Zootopia Fanfiction On The Internet

Top 50 Best Zootopia Fanfiction That You Haven't Read

Our Title and Heading say' it all today we have some of the best Zootopia fanfiction stories for you fanfiction lovers, and if you guys were searching for these Fanfiction Zootopia stories the search no further. we hope you guys love our best collection of top-rated series, anime, games and movie collection.

Zootopia was released in 2016 in America that too in 3d, it is basically a computer-animated comedy film. From this journey, there have been many Zootopia Fanfiction Lovers all around the globe. Zootopia was released by Walt Disney pictures and the exact release date of Zootopia is February 13, 2016. Let's Begin Our Collection of the Best Zootopia Fanfiction on the internet.

Straight_up_geek Why did Disney make me ship and bunny and a fox together??

Kido Zootopia is one of the few Disney movies I feel actually NEEDS a sequel. There’s so much more world and character building they could do.

zootman Ive never gone crazy with any disney princess couples, but now im shipping a bunny and a fox so hard. Omg

arman-shk If you ship Judy and Nick put a thumbs up. And if you want to let me know why you ship them.

peolk.s Ok but low key Judy and nick remind me so much of rapunzel and Eugene. Must be the similarities that make both of them my favorite movies and characters😍

super35 Why Did Disney Tell Me To Ship Them , THEN NO KISSING SCENE?!?!

love_u I'd be more than happy to see them as an official couple. And if there's a sequel on the way...lead down that road

here_i_am That's now what I say to my friends in gta when somebody attacks me. "Boys, Ice Em "

dum dudu If ever there was an Oscar for best animated performance, Nick Wilde would easily win. Jason Bateman really delivered with this role, especially the fact that he improvised a lot of the dialogue.

c@re They are cute couple specially the fox ia handsome and the bunny is so cute Zootopia was the 55th Disney feature animated movie, Byron Howard and Rich Moore were the directors of this movie. Fanfiction Zootopia lovers are also huge fans of these two individuals. The Co-director of Zootopia was Jared Bush. Zootopia Fanfiction Human Voice lovers who love the voice in the film are mentioned below.

We hope you guys liked our collection of the best Zootopia Fanfiction Updates, that we are providing you guys. Please share this as much as possible.

Zootopia Fanfiction Human version 2020

The voices that rocked the movie all around the world were Ginnifer Goodwin, Jason Bateman, Idris Elba, and others are mentioned down below in the other section of this Zootopia Fanfiction Stories article. The reason why we give the emphasis on these Zootopia fanfiction human voice personalities were the real reason for the blockbuster of Zootopia. YB Judy: it just burns me up to see such a bad attitude forwards foxes.. Also Judy: carries an anti fox spray Alyssa Love the subtle racism. She is surprised that a fox can be smart, and condescendingly praises him for being "articulate." Nick sarcastically calls her non-patronizing afterwards. 😂 Fallen Tacozz Judy: Are your costumers aware... They are getting snot and mucus with there cookies and cream. Boy elephant: Spits out ice cream on girl elephant: )X Random person Judy: are your customers aware their getting snot and mucus in their cookies and cream The couple with cookies and cream: OH FUC- Brandon Christopher The initial prejudice by the cop to assume that violence (reaching for her weapon) was the best way to handle the Fox... That's how it is and feels. Plus being judged by the owner of the ice cream shop in front of everyone is demeaning as well...for example when you're followed around the store and treated poorly wherever you go. (Black people of color equal income and credit get less money for loans for homes and businesses than white people of the exact same qualifications.) Rhonda howard Even when she thinks she's done something nice she's still treating them like they're less than with her tone as the Fox points out. lego nightwing Prejudice is going away but it's still very real. I appreciate all people white, black and all colors and backgrounds who understand this and fights against it. jackson selqiust "Now that is high praise. It's rare that I find someone so non-patronizing." blitz sapphire This is a great subtle jab Nick makes at Judy here that flew over my head the first time I heard it. The praise that Judy gives him is so condescending when you really think about it. It's that "wow, you're really well-spoken for a black person" compliment. Roeland Farah The fur textures in this movie are amazing. Blows my mind tbh Hoping that you guys liked our collection of the best Zootopia Fanfiction Human Version, that we are providing you guys. Please share this as much as possible. Fanfiction Zootopia Stories Updated in 2020 The Story of Zootopia revolves around the unlikely relationship or you can say the partnership between a very smart red fox and a rabbit police officer(who always dreamt of being an officer since Her Childhood). That's why people love Such Fanfiction Zootopia stories. These two try to find out a criminal conspiracy that connects them to the unusual disappearance of the predators.   miss anime "I'd lose my head if it weren't attached to my neck. That's the truth." So me😂😂 dylingr The writing in this scene is so well-written. It captures both the big and small instances of racism that often happens; both the hostile side and the non-hostile side. Favorite moments: "I'm such a..." "You probably can't read, fox" "I just want to say you're a great dad and a real articulate fellow" "Oh, well that is high praise. It's rare that I find someone so non-patronizing. *fake smile*" citavalo If it ended it like that, you can call it a short animation with a message behind it. animal fafic I love this movie so much. It makes me smile, brings up all sort of expressions I'm not aware of until afterwards. That's how you know it's a good movie. You're so invested in it that you don't even know what your face looks like. You're just totally in the world of the film. John martin "real articulate fella" that's the best compliment you could come up with. Did you think he couldn't speak English or something and are pleased he can. Dude you deserved to be had xxlinuxxx Fashionably late guys. Or a sloth uploaded it or something "new and hip" like that lmao. bazil I had this happen at a store when I came in to do some grocery shopping. I'm the type to wear band tees and jeans (it goes with the story I'm about to tell) and that's my usual attire. takimg a shower, dried my hair (which is always wavy and voluminous) brushed my teeth, had to go out to get food. already had some items in my basket when I was looking around in one aisle and an employee who was stocking items was watching me. I smiled at them and went back to looking at the boxes of pasta in front of me. Next thing I know, I have the manager asking me what I was doing and the guy I smiled at standing behind him. bazil I was asked for my ID and when I did, they said that it was fake. I do look younger than I am. They asked me to leave. I said I had money and wanted to pay for my items. They said I won't be paying with anything that's not mine (they thought my ID was fake and my credit cards were fake, therefore, believing I am a thief..like I was just going to walk out with my basket) I said, no everything I have is real and that I'm not a teen looking to steal. Even when I showed the manager my credit cards, he automatically said, "That doesn't mean anything to me." I got a full "up down" look from the stocking guy, like just because I'm very skinny with wild hair and had on a band tee and ripped jeans didn't mean shit. I put my basket down and left. odinia legend has it you can still her the toot toot to this day raven paruli Me: this cookies and cream ice cream is really great! News Cast says that there is bacteria in ice cream We are sure that you people loved our collection of the best Fanfiction Zootopia stories, that we are providing you guys. Please share this as much as possible. Zootopia Fanfiction Lemon Series As the Story continues the fox fond himself having a crush on the lady rabbit officer. We are sure that we have some of the dirty-minded people here visiting this webpage about Zootopia Fanfiction Lemon Stories. Zootopia was released in Belgium in 2d, Digital 3d and also in ReadD 3d, the best was Imax 3d formats in the united states. Mr Choice "We reserve the right to refuse service to anyone" Some establishments are still like that sadly mr abby wabby The moment I first seen this movie and I seen the elephant don't got gloves for they trunks I was like HEALTH HAZARD! 😂lmao puffered fish The ONLY thing I can think of when I see this scene is how unsanitary that ice cream place is XD xin yi zou The thing that always is in my mind is that Judy is my name as well 😂😂😂 warrior dragon564 Got a genuine laugh outta me when i read the description about he uncensored version, lol The killer Me: sees naked animals gagging Also me: sees Marina without her off the hook outfit THIS JUST GROSS AND DISGUSTANG blazelth Only real flaw I can spot: showing Bellweather as the villain in the "trailer". They went out of their way to hide the fact that she was the villain in all the advertising so it could be a big shock once the reveal happened in the movie sea slat Welcome to the Kill Count, where we tally up the victim in all our favorite horror movies! I'm James A. Janisse and today we're looking at Zootopia anonymous FINALLY I GOT WHAT THE HELL I WANTED HE KILLED HER YASS IT FINALLY MAKES SENS Battlr bin me: expects a short fan film casually looks at the duration bar at the bottom left corner me: confused screaming Make sure that you people loved our collection of the best Zootopia Fanfiction Lemon stories, that we are providing you guys. Please share this as much as possible. Zootopia fanfiction Crossover People Also Like the Zootopia Fanfiction crossover stories that why! we also have a series of the best zootopia crossover fanfiction and we can also Zootopia Fanfiction Crossover as well. joseph lay Judy:“You have to let me go” Nick:“I don’t want to let you go” That broke my heart 😭 unfc Judy: "I'm in love with a fox" The entire zootopia universe: "Say sike rn" susanana Nick: “honey tell them to buzz off” “honey who is it?” Awe he already has little names to call Judy ���🥰😂 skelei bones Me: sees Miles Walker Miles Walker: future mayor Me: he is evil 😏 max jordon "i call bull.." Nick: "close.. but no dice.. its a buffalo!" swear jokes no3 drive Is everyone just going to skip past the part where Nick goes “and I’m her boy toy 😏 ¯\_(ツ)_/¯” jennings Y'all see the phone, during Nick's song, that shows the sheep holding a gun? destiny ganfic " I bet you use your hand everynight" I laughed so hard when judy said that Alpha 3.o Disney wouldn't have the guts to make a sequel like this. kurt langberg Coffee? You know what that means? Yes, we’ve watched Luke Cage. We know what “coffee” means. we are sure that you guys liked our collection the 50 best Zootopia Fanfiction Stories and people can also say that fanfiction Zootopia stories. It depends on the fanfiction lovers interset. If you people have any suggestions or want any other fanfiction stories like this Zootopia Fanfiction Stories, you can comment down in the comment section below of this article on Fanfiction Zootopia Updates. We just want to make sure that you guys love these Zootopia Fanfiction stories and always keep on reading such Zootopia Fanfiction Crossover. Share these Zootopia Fanfiction Crossover Series to the other fanfiction lovers who are searching for such Fanfiction Zootopia Stories all over the internet. Thank you Best Pokemon Fanfiction Stories     Read the full article

[blackseouls]

Void

(Gif is not mine, credit to the owner)

Title: Void (Part I)

Pairing: Reader x Choi Seunghyun (TOP)

Genre: Fluff/Angst

Void

          It finally happened. After years of being together you boyfriend Mark finally proposed to you. You had dreamt of this moment for so long, to finally feel truly wanted, to feel as if you undoubtedly belong in his life, that he, without a doubt, wanted you by his side forever. You had waited so long for this type of commitment, a stamp of permanence to solidify your relationship so you can be free of the uncertainties that surround your ties to one another. This was it, the reassurance you craved, to know that you were wanted in return. But as the disbelief and excitement dissipated you became aware of a lingering haze encasing you. A sense of emptiness that followed the brief, intoxicating, high that perched itself onto your shoulders and whispered in your ear, the truth behind the façade and spectacle… that this proposal did nothing to fill the void within your relationship; it failed to make you whole. You blink back the tears that your friends and family believe to be manifestations of your happiness and force a smile that you desperately wish will reach your heart as you slowly drift into denial chanting, “This is what I wanted.”

           Little did you know, in the back left corner of the luxurious bar your best friend, Choi Seunghyun, looks on in revulsion as he sees the love of his life pledging to tie herself to a man who not only fails to love her the way she deserves but, fails to see the pain and distance behind her eyes as he parades her around the posh and overdone room.

—————————————————————————————————

           As time passes, you feel more comfortable with your relationship and the impending marriage, throwing yourself full force into planning the immaculate and large wedding requested by Mark as he “needs to impress his fellow associates and clients who will be attending.” Although you only wanted a small affair with close friends and family, Mark wanted to invite everyone, turning your desire for a humble gathering into a full-blown show rivaling the likes of the Vegas Strip… well that’s at least how you saw it. You were brought out of your thoughts by your phone’s incessant ringing, quickly answering it in hopes of returning to the wedding planning sooner rather than later.

“Hello?” you say, completely forgetting to glance at the caller id.

“Hey Babe, What are you up to?” Mark says cheerfully, although he sounds tired.

“Hey Mark, I’m just going over some of the wedding details…a lot of stuff to do you know? What’s going on though?”

“I just wanted to let you know that I can’t make it to the tasting at 6:00, some of the guys from the office are going to have a drink at Bar 9 and I need to be there to monitor potential deals.”

You glanced at the clock and realized it was 4:45. You sighed as you began to rub your temples, taking a deep breath before saying, “Are you sure you can’t come? This is pretty important, and I really don’t want to do it alone…”

Frustration began to seep into Mark’s voice as he answered, “Y/n, you know I wouldn’t miss this if I didn’t have to. I gotta to go now, but why don’t you invited Seunghyun? I am sure you guys will have a great time! Later Babe, love you.”

           With a frustrated groan you throw your phone to the side, why does Mark seem so disinterested in a wedding he wants? As you lay your head on your arms beyond frustrated with the amount of work that goes into a spectacle of this size you hear a knock on the door.

          Gathering what’s left of your sanity you make you way to the door, opening it to find your very wet best friend holding a tray full of drinks and sporting a very serious expression. “I got wet.” Is all he says as he makes his way into your home taking off his drenched coat and soggy shoes, handing you the drinks in the process. You look at him and say “Why did you come out in this weather then Hyunie?”

“You know you are far too fancy for this!” You remark with a chuckle as you walk into the kitchen and take a seat at the bar. Seunghyun follows suit and takes a seat next to you as he retorts, “Normally I wouldn’t venture out in this but I knew my “Y/n” would need a pick me up with all the work she has been putting into this wedding, so here I am! I bring two cups of your favorite tea!” He says gesturing to the two large cups in front of you. You laugh as you reply, “and what are these two?” pointing to the two other cups nestled into the tray.

           Seunghyun smiles as he takes one of the cups into his hand and says, “This one is for me” his eyes travel to the last remaining beverage as his tone falls ever so slightly murmuring, “And that is for Mark.” You sigh as you look to Seunghyun who is eyeing you closely stating, “He’s not here… I don’t know when he will be back, I just know that he isn’t coming to the tasting tonight.” A sadness washed over you briefly, the sadness that you try so avidly to keep at bay, the reminder of how empty you feel underneath all the planning and details that paint the fairytale you once thought would complete you.

           Seunghyun broke through you thoughts by grabbing your hand, squeezing it to assure you he was there and he always would be. Little did you know that while he maintained his collected veneer, deep inside Seunghyun was livid, noting yet another instance of Mark failing to be the man you need.

—————————————————————————————————

          You and Seunghyun met at a gallery in the city, you working for the gallery itself while Seunghyun was sponsoring an exhibition to be held over an extended weekend. One morning he came in fairly early, expecting to finalize the arrangement of the pieces to find you in front of a painting, staring as if you were attempting to  eh brush stroke and secret the piece had to offer. He walked up beside you, moved by the attention you were giving the piece, and asked for you interpretation.

           As you looked to him, you couldn’t help the feeling that washed over you… you felt comfortable, as if you had known this man for years. He held your eyes with his genuine curiosity and a flash of something you couldn’t quite pinpoint, compelling you to express how you felt about the piece, no editing or doubt, just the emotions that swallowed you whole as you lost yourself in this painting.

           “She is alone,” you say, looking back to the painting, “… trapped by the emptiness around her but she will never crumble. She holds herself up as she shatters internally keeping the appearance of control, as she unravels from the inside,” you mutter as you push a strand of hair behind your ear, never once looking away from the painting as you continue, “But she is not broken from what others have done to her, she is empty because of what she will never have, what she wants more than anything… to belong. To belong in this world, to belong in her body… to belong to someone… to feel complete.”

            You take a deep breath, “The dark greys and light blues surround her, but despite the nothingness that binds itself to her… she stands there, completely upright… as if nothing is wrong… It is incredibly moving, the texture is also excellent.” As you finish your statement, you turn your head to the right to find a pair of dark eyes intently trained on yours. He looks at you as if he is desperately trying to find the right words to say.

           After a few moments he takes a step closer to you and simply states, “Wow, you’re really passionate when you speak.” There is a beat of silence before you both laugh. He then introduces himself and you reciprocate, not knowing that ever since you first locked eyes, before you expressed such raw emotion that resonated so deeply in the man to your right, Choi Seunghyun has been completely enchanted by you, and you alone.

           The seriousness you felt during the initial moments of your first encounter two years ago soon dissipated, giving way to the ridiculous and whimsical nature of your current relationship, but you know that under all the silliness, teasing, and deadly glares, that you both shared an understanding of each other, and if one of you needed anything, from a shoulder to cry on to someone to shroud you from the cold world, you would both be there for each other… you’d be there in a heartbeat.

—————————————————————————————————

           You stay that way for a while, Seunghyun holding your hand as you stare off into space. He is never one to push you, he is the one that will stay by your side no matter how long the wait because he just wants to be there for you. You clear your throat, forcing yourself back into reality stating, “So…Seunghyun,” you turn slightly and smile at him, “Want to go to a food tasting tonight?” Seunghyun lets go of your hand opting to place his hand upon you cheek, stroking it in such a way you would think that you were made of glass. He smiles as he says, without any hesitation, “Of course, I would do anything for you, Y/n.”

—————————————————————————————————

          The ride to the restaurant is peaceful. Seunghyun insists on driving, so you sit comfortably in the front seat listening to the rain pound against the windshield as the car travels ever so carefully down the road. The restaurant is beautiful, you enter the establishment and are immediately whisked away to a private room. It is gorgeous, the exposed brick walls, the large window to the side gives a remarkable view of a small lake, and the space is lit with glowing string lights that are draped from the ceiling, giving the room a warm glow that stuns you.

           After you are seated you turn to Seunghyun and mutter, “This place is gorgeous.” He smiles as he glances around at the space before returning his eyes to you and responding, “It really is, I like how it is simple and more about a pleasant atmosphere than trying to appear extravagant.”

           You respond with a smirk as you challenge, “Is it too simple for my dear Seunghyun?” chuckling to yourself you don’t notice the way Seunghyun tenses at your use of  “my,” as he thinks to himself “She has never called me hers before…” But before Seunghyun can respond, the chef walks in and greets you both and explains the courses you both will be trying this evening as you are presented with the first plate.

           It is delicious, as are the four plates that followed. You and Seunghyun are both in awe of the dishes you had both consumed, completely immersed in the dinner and the silly conversations you two found yourselves in. It isn’t until you both are halfway through the desert that the conversation turns more serious as Seunghyun can no longer keep his curiosity, or frustration, at bay. “So… why couldn’t Mark come tonight?” He asks as he places his wine down and turns to face you. You look up from your food, stunned by the abrupt shift in tone and conversation as you express a meek, “What?”

           Seunghyun just continues to stare at you, waiting for a response. You shift uncomfortably in your seat, not expecting this subject to be brought up so soon. You clear your throat and state, “He said he needed to go to the bar with guys from work.”

            You keep your head down as you speak because as hard as it is for you to admit, it’s embarrassing, your own fiancé choosing them over you. Seunghyun lets out a dark chuckle and your head snaps up to find him shaking his head as he says, “He is… he is something else…” His expression grows darker as he continues, “Y/n, he is an idiot, he can’t see past his own ludicrous ambitions to notice that he is hurting you, to see that you aren’t happy with any of this… with him.”

           He paused and you finally meet his eyes because he knows, Seunghyun has seen right through you this entire time, he can see that you don’t want this… you are knocked out of your thoughts when Seunghyun continues, “He should be here with you, he should take every chance he gets to hold you, kiss you, love you because that’s what you do when you love someone, but most of all, you just show up.”

           He pauses to grab your hand as you sit, stunned by the words leaving your best friends mouth. “Do you know what you mean to me? Y/n, you mean everything to me and I will always be there for you and I will always support you, but I need you to look me in the eye and tell me you are happy. Tell me this, all of this, is what you want, tell me so I can support you…”

           As Seunghyun finishes, you find yourself trapped. You want to tell him no. You want to scream it. You want to say “No, I’m not happy! I can’t breathe. I don’t know how to get out of this, to escape from this mess I have created.” You want to throw yourself into Seunghyun’s arms and finally ask the question that has been haunting you for far longer than you care to admit… “Should it really be this way?” But you remain still as you battle with yourself, eyes trained on his; you see nothing but the incoherent images of your relationship flash through your mind. Seunghyun stares at you, and although your body remains still he sees the pain painted on your face and the conflict raging within you; above all else he sees the fear that you perpetually try to bury underneath humor and master showmanship. He knows now that he can’t support your relationship because he loves you and even if you don’t find contentment with him, you deserve all the happiness in the world and Mark wasn’t giving it to you.

          Just as you open your mouth to speak the chef returns, asking for feedback and comments on the meal. You both snap back into reality focusing on the woman in front of you and the delicious food you had both enjoyed. After finalizing the date and times for your upcoming ceremony she begins to make her way out of the room before abruptly turning to say, “Serving you two was an honor. You are both respectful and kind and that is something we could really use more of around here… You know I have prepared food for many couples, but the way you look at each other is truly moving, you look at each other as if the world begins and ends with the other and that is something you do not see often. The comfort you have with one another is something you should treasure;, you are both blessed. I look forward to seeing you on your special day. It was wonderful meeting you.” With that she exits the room, leaving you and Seunghyun in silence.

[bloodinhershoesrpg]

WHEN THE CURTAIN DROPS...

From the instant you could stand on your own small feet, you knew what you wanted them to be capable of, delicate tricks that would make you a living one day. It had always been so crystal clear to you, your future shining in vivid shades of pastel dreams and blinding stage lights and the odds were in your favour as long as they could be, catapulting a girl to stardom who could not yet celebrate her successes with anything stronger than weakly concentrated wine. Through the nightly streets of Paris, your name echoed in anguish and awe alike, the suspicion of something so supreme inevitably crumbling to pieces instilled in your admirer’s minds long before you could have ever seen it coming. It came in the form of a man, the beginning of the swan’s end, in love and a change of perspective, in a fragile heart besotted to otherworldly extents. The girl who only ever dreamt of being a prima ballerina longed for it all: marriage, a house, maybe a child or two once the time was right. The ring you got, the house you were working towards — all of that in exchange for nothing more than your career, a small sacrifice in relation to the wonders of happily ever after. And you came so close to it you could graze the vision with your fingertips as lightly as your lover’s jawline until the day came on which he was never to return. The day your misery commenced.

...YOU SHOW YOUR TRUE COLOURS

'The boy died,’ a line in A Streetcar Named Desire tearing on your heartstrings since childhood had become your reality, abruptly so, without even the faintest hint of a warning. Destiny had turned its cruel back to you, a fallen star, your shine too dim for Paris’ boulevards as you spiralled further and further into the gloominess of your unendurable grief. They’d give you another chance, they claimed mercifully, but you knew all too well that they would never cease to see the weeping widow in black silk in you, your past a heavy shadow pushing you back onto your soles whenever en pointe. Only word of your glory had reached neighbouring shores, the light at the end of the tunnel for you appearing to be making your escape, a Parisienne delight fallen from grace packing her bags for Birmingham and never looking back. Your youth you had wasted along with your skill, your time in the spotlight had passed, the realisation sinking in as they eyed your ID with unconcealed disdain after praising your performance. Albeit age having never been just a number in your business you would not cave, not completely, never again. Your current employment comes with its ups and downs, responsibility at times making your head spin more than the pressure of perfection on stage but you pull through with a smile on your face, the genuinity of it no longer your concern. It is what it is, je ne regrette rien you whisper to yourself as La Môme Piaf lulls you to restless slumber. One day, in a world of such unpredictable mortality, this too shall pass.

VICTIM OR CULPRIT?

With your sights set on the stage, your mind roaming behind the curtains, your physical form remains banned to the rehearsal rooms. Adeline Moreau, the former star du spectacle turned ballet mistress, the most appropriate position, they say, for a danseuse of the age of forty. Ethereal beauty had become your trademark in your days of glory, many likening you to Dita von Teese, but the eyes that stare back at you from the mirror now have lost their shine long ago, the glow of liveliness only returning to your features for fleeting moments of success. Oh, don’t you wish you could make it last?

IN RELATION TO

MILLICENT BABIČ: No relationship has ever been as conflicting as the one you share with this woman, your boss, your saviour but also a frequent thorn in your side. Piteous stares were glued to your steps as you first entered the Queen Victoria’s Opera House’s main stage with the exception of hers, alert and riveted, glimmering with a fierceness commonly mistaken for viciousness. Friend and foe alike, she has believed in you when no one else was willing to yet her way of ruling over creative freedom distresses a woman used to getting her way, not to even mention the colleague she has cursed you with. In the end, you keep your lips sealed, tightly pressed together in detestation, always the smart one, always giving in, with the hope that suppressed accusations may never bubble out in a fit of unladylike rage. BARBARA DONNE: In no other danseuse have you ever spied so much of yourself, the urge to take her under your wing inexorable. A biased frown directed at everyone underestimating talent and composure laced with vulnerability, you’ve shown her the occasional trick or two a nobler woman would have shared with the entire company, however you know when you are merely wasting your breath and that such would never be the case as long as Barbie is the one addressed. With your help, she has finally increased in rank and the gratefulness in her smile is enough to console you for another night, another week, her joy your reward, a blissful feeling you imagine a woman normally harbours only for her own flesh and blood. FRANCISCO GARCÍA: You hang your head in shame at the thoughts he evokes, passively stirring up memories you’ve been so insistent on forgetting for too many years of your tragic life. Too akin are his mannerisms to those of the man you lost, too deeply rooted is your despair for those similarities to not oscillate you to the core. At times you fear he interprets your distant demeanour as dislike for both his performance and his person when, in reality, there is no other danseur whose skill you admire quite like his. If only yours words didn’t fail to sound sincere, the sadness that swings in your tone too heavily weighing them down for them to not sound like excuses, carefully selected to avoid hurting a struggling artist’s feelings; if only you could look at him without your husband’s features morphing into his.

WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW

Chances of Survival: Slim Applicant must be open to portraying intrusive thoughts Faceclaim is non-negotiable

Taking auditions!