#genre: swedish lit

[misireads]

Män som hatar kvinnor ("Men who hate women") by Stieg Larsson

[ audiobook, listened in finnish ]

an investigative journalist and the head of a magazine named millennium is convicted of publishing a fradulent article defaming some billionaire guy and decides to step down from his position. he's then hired by an elderly former CEO of a powerful family enterprise to travel to some tiny ass town in the middle of nowhere to investigate what happened to this old man's great niece who disappeared 40 years ago. mikael the journalist accepts the assignment, not expecting to find anything new at this point, but is drawn in deep into the vanger family's troubling history and broken relationships with each other. his research is eventually joined by a very weird young woman named lisbeth who turns out to be one hell of a hacker, and together they not only solve the lost niece's case but also reveal how that billionaire that mikael originally wrote about is even shadier than expected.

➕ this is really three stories in one: the story of mikael and millennium and the wennerström guy he wrote the article about; the story of the vanger family and the mystery of harriet's disappearance; and the story of lisbeth, her past and present, a total deep dive into what made her the kind of person she now is and how she operates. and i looove that, i really enjoy layered storytelling. when you go in, you don't know what to expect and there's the intrigue about mikael's sentencing, then you're thrown a curveball about this really complicated family, all while lisbeth's story kinda plays in the background seemingly unrelated. this captured my attention wholly and completely.

➕ i adore lisbeth's character. she's implied to be neurodivergent, a total bad bitch who doesn't take shit from anyone, defies all expectations, is independent and resourceful despite nobody having any faith in her. she gets back at her tormentors in the most satisfying way.

➕ the vanger family deserves its own plus point because i just love stories about weird families with internal conflict and tons of skeletons in the closet and the protag has to kind of dig it all out because nobody is willing to speak but it's obvious there's something very wrong about these people. though the truth about them turned out to be so gross instead of just weird, it's really off-putting but

➕ i liked that this was a mystery solved by a journalist and a… well whatever lisbeth is, because i'm not really a fan of police or detective novels. i mean i've read some good ones but i dunno, i always prefer stories about laypeople solving mysteries and crime.

➕ this is soooo swedish.

➖ could have been a bit shorter, some parts kinda dragged on. although i liked the ending, there were like 3 hours left of the audiobook by the time the harriet mystery had been solved which made me kinda… okay time to speed the audio up to 1.25x because this is gonna drag the fuck oooon.

➖ content-wise this gets really really gruesome. it was almost a bit much even for me.

➖ not a minus about the book itself but i find it in such poor taste that the english translation is titled "the girl with the dragon tattoo" which is a reference to a very minor detail about lisbeth and it just does nothing for this novel or anything in general. i can understand maybe they didn't want to call this "men who hate women" (which is the literal translation they kept for the finnish title) for international marketing purposes because it would deter so much of the male target audience lmao (i don't think it does in sweden and finland??? just saying). but the original title packs way more of a punch because that's exactly what this book is about, it's about misogynism. and that title is so self aware. but no, instead you make it "the girl with the dragon tattoo" and lisbeth isn't even the main character. she's a secondary one, a sidekick to mikael. this book isn't about her per se and most definitely not about her tattoos. what a stupid choice. i don't want to watch the film versions because i worry they made this way more about her than it should be.

⭐ score: 4- -- one of the better mysteries i've read in a long time for sure. i don't think i'll go for the sequels though, i had my share of mikael and lisbeth already. the audiobook was like 18 hours long.

[snooyaki]

𓂃.ᐟ 𖦹 MOTH TO A FLAME

paring ୨୧ : taesan x female reader

genre ୨୧ : angst

warnings ୨୧ : taesan is an ass, alcohol, aggressive makeout, cussing

wc ୨୧ : 2669

a/n : im back w a taesan fic FINALLYYY!! pls listen to this song while reading!! moth to a flame by the weeknd is what inspired me! hope u all enjoy 💋

all your friends say hes the one, his love for you is true.

SHE COULD NOT STOP thinking about the way his hands cupped her face, smashing his soft plush lips against hers as they kissed roughly to the point it left her lips all swollen and bruised the next morning.

or the feeling of his fingertips grazing over her waist before giving it a tight squeeze as he pressed her up against the wall, nipping at the thin skin of her neck.

god, y/n could think about him all day long.

“y/n! you should totally go for him!”

y/n snapped out of her daydreams, her eyes trailing from the wall, to her friend who sat in front of her. the girl blinked a few times, realization slowly hitting her.

she had just dozed off for the third time that day. she needed to get a hold of herself.

y/n rubbed the nape of her neck with a soft embarrassed chuckle, tilting her head to the side with slight shame.

“sorry … what are we talking about again..?”

wonyoung groaned as she rolled her eyes in annoyance. “hellooo, we’re talking about myeong jaehyun!” she reminded, her lips pouted slightly as she frowned at you not listening to her.

right, the upperyear myeong jaehyun. the captain of the soccer team and the school’s sweetheart. y/n’s friends had been trying hard to set the two up after finding out that jaehyun had just a little crush on you, a little meaning a lot.

you were pretty, kind, and lit up a room with your warm smile. how could myeong jaehyun not fall for a girl like you?

despite all the attention she received at school, she showed no interest in any of the boys around her. sure jaehyun was good looking, played soccer, and had such a good personality, but y/n showed little to no interest in the soccer boy. the girl’s friends had always wondered why, but never wondered because of who.

“he obviously likes you y/n, why dont you just give it a shot?” minji piped in, finally lifting her nose out of her book she had been hooked on for days.

y/n shook her head with a sigh, reaching into her bag to bring out the compact mirror she planned on using to make herself look “busy”.

“im not interested in myeong jaehyun.” you stated, staring at the three girls surrounding you before opening up your mirror as your eyes scanned your face.

the lipstain was rubbing off, slightly revealing your bruised lips. y/n had decided to wear a darker plum coloured lip shade in attempts to hide the bruising. it seemed to be doing a good job considering none of her friends had noticed. at least the concealer covering your dark hickey was holding up.

“but y/nnn! myeong jaehyun is so good for you, hes perfect!” sullyoon beamed excitedly, her eyes watching as you swipe the soft applicator across your bottom lip while concentrating on your reflection in the mirror.

“cant talk, busy.” you mutter, causing all three girls to let out an exasperated groan.

“myeong jaehyun huh? i agree.”

y/n knit her eyes brows as she gazed up, only wishing she hadnt. it wasn’t odd for him to show up whenever y/n was hanging out with her friends. his best friends, jungwon and leehan, were friends with hers, wonyoung and sullyoon. but no matter how many times she could see him in a day, she would always be taken by surprise.

“see, even jungwon agrees.” minji sighed, shaking her head as the three boys came to sit with the girls.

y/n felt a shiver go down her spine seeing him take a seat diagonally across from her, fighting every urge she had to not look his way.

“jaehyun is a good guy, right taesan?”

leehan nudged his friends shoulder to get his attention, watching as the boy shrugged his shoulders with a disinterested nod. “hes alright.”

“y/n, hey!”

speak of the devil.

the group look up to be met with none other than a smiling myeong jaehyun, whos attention was all on you. it took your friends everything in them to not stop squealing, hitting each other in excitement.

y/n smiled lightly back at the male, slowly scooting down in her seat to make room for the other. “hi jaehyun, no soccer practice today?” you question as the male takes a seat next to you happily.

jaehyun shakes his head like an obedient puppy, gazing at you with nothing but love in his eyes. “not today, i thought id come see you.” he chuckled, as you lightly smile in response.

“so cute ….” wonyoung whispered to minji next to her as they fangirled at the sight of you two together.

no one seemed to notice the smirk playing over taesans lips, as he watched you and jaehyun interact closely, and carefully.

no one seemed to notice but you.

ೀ

but does he know you call me when he sleeps?

“so, myeong jaehyun huh?”

you roll his eyes at the mention of his name, running a hand through your hair as you flipped onto your stomach, laying on the bed with your feet in the air.

“dont mention his name, taesan.” the girl sighed, resting her chin against the palm of her hand.

you could hear taesans sinister chuckle on the other side of the line. you can just see the stupid smirk he has on his face.

“why? i wanna talk about it.” taesan hummed in response.

“does he know about me?”

y/n shook her head with a light huff. in all honesty, you were a bit upset at taesan. y/n didn’t know why or how she ended up on the phone with him at 1:16 am. but thats how every night went. well, those nights they werent together.

but does he know the pictures that you keep?

y/n had been spending her night peacefully on her bed, soft music playing from her speakers as she scrolled through her phone aimlessly, before finding herself going through her photos. more specifically, the photos you and taesan had taken together the morning after a steamy night. all bundled in your bedsheets, naked, and holding each other close.

thats how you found your way to the phone app, pressing on taesans contact.

in all honesty, you were upset at him after finding him in the washroom of a party kissing another girl. after catching him you two broke out in a huge fight. its not the first time it had happened. you two were nothing but friends with benefits. but of course, as always someone catches feelings within that relationship. that someone was you.

“im not talking about this with you taesan.” you reply shortly, and bluntly. taesan could tell you were upset.

“are you still upset?” taesan questioned in a taunting and irritated tone. that was enough to get you all riled up again.

“i dont know, you tell me.” she spat viciously, hearing a scoff coming from the male on the other line.

“oh dont start-“

“you were supposed to be with me that night!” you shouted at him, your hands catching a hold on one of your stuffed animals as you squeezed it to your chest for comfort, sitting up from your laid position before taking a deep breath, “but no, like the dick you are you just had to be fucking another girl when you told me you would stick by me that night- you know what i dont know why i trusted you. this always fucking happens with you!!” y/n finally concluded, feeling herself get choked up with tears at the end.

but does he know the reasons that you cry?

you were crying again. crying all because of han taesan.

“the fuck did i tell you that night, y/n?” taesan spat, causing you to almost flinch from the venom dripping from his voice.

“stop acting like we’re dating.”

y/n held her breath at his words. right. they weren’t dating. she had somehow forgot that when spilling out her emotions just now.

“youre really fucking annoying, you know that? god. we arent even dating and you’re just so suffocating.” taesan groaned.

his words hit her like a stone. tears were spilling from her eyes as she tried her best to keep quiet. she could not let han taesan hear her cry, although she knew he knew.

“we’re over taesan. i fucking mean it.” your shaky voice concluded. you couldnt take it anymore. you needed to be free from satan himself.

“baby, there wasnt even a beginning to start with.”

“go to hell.” you growled, ready to just hang up the phone before taesan had spoke, causing you to pause in your tracks.

“no matter how much love he gives you, you’ll always come back.” taesans voice spoke eerily, causing you to run a hand through your hair frustratedly, a sniffle coming from you as you continued to silently sob.

you knew it was true.

“you’ll never escape me.”

ೀ

buzz, buzz, buzz!

y/n’s phone would not stop buzzing as the girl stared at the device that lay on her bed in distress. no. you couldnt. you cant answer that damn phone.

you could not give in to han taesan this time.

“y/n!” sullyoon, snapping y/n out of her thoughts as she gazed her attention up towards the girl appearing from out of her closet. “should i wear this tonight?” the girl questioned, as she smiled, nodding her head in approval.

“you’ll look so pretty yoon.” you hummed, as she nodded her head retreating back into the closet.

it had been two weeks since your last argument with taesan over the phone, and two weeks since you last spoke to him.

it had never went on for that long. y/n was scared. no matter how badly taesan treated her, she was scared of losing him.

so, she decided to spend a lot more time with jaehyun.

she knew it was wrong, using jaehyun to get over taesan, as well as get back at him. all of her friends approved of this sudden change. they really believed jaehyun was the perfect guy for her.

“your boyfriend is the best y/n, tell him thanks for getting us into this party.” minji hummed, focusing as she dabbed eyeshadow onto her eyelid.

y/n shook her head with a soft sigh and an eyeroll as she sat at her vanity, gazing into the mirror and lightly curling her hair.

“hes not my boyfriend.”

“yet.” wonyoung intervened, spritzing perfume on her neck before looking at you. “not your boyfriend yet.” she snickered.

after an eternity y/n and the girls had finally finished getting ready, making their way inside the huge house party as the booming music rang through their ears.

“oh! guys its jaehyun- y/nnn its jaehyunnn!” wonyoung slurred, as minji and sullyoon squealed in excitement.

maybe you four went a little hardcore during your pregame.

“hey … you guys okay?” jaehyun chuckled lightly, eyes widening at the sight of you stumbling.

jaehyun quickly wrapped his arms around your waist, steadying your balance. you, drunk and in heels was not a good combination.

y/n’s red face gazed up at jaehyun, a tipsy smile playing over her lips. “jaehyun!” she cheered, wrapping her arms around the males neck latching onto him with her dear life.

jaehyun was flustered. it was her first time making physical contact with him. although you were drunk, he loved it.

“hey y/n,” jaehyun chuckled, snaking his arm around your waist as he gazed down at you with a blush over his cheeks. “come on, lets get you some water.” jaehyun suggested, guiding you through the busy crowd.

“no!” you exclaimed, grabbing jaehyuns hand before dragging him with much force towards the dance floor. “come on, lets dance.”

it didnt take much for jaehyun to give in, and forget about grabbing the drunken girl a cup of water. here he was, dancing with you on the dance floor as your bodies pressed against each other from the crowd.

you knew he was watching.

there taesan stood, a drink in his hand as he leaned up against the kitchen doorway, watching you and jaehyun like a hawk. his grip on his red solo cup grew tighter, and tighter as he watched you and jaehyun get closer, and closer.

he didnt know why he was so upset. taesan swore he only liked y/n for casual hookups. but no, with the feeling of jealousy raising inside of him, he didnt have time to think and reason with himself.

“hey, han. you okay?” a voice spoke, although not catching taesans attention whatsoever as his eyes remained on the pair.

taesan downed his drink in one harsh gulp, wiping the alcohol spilling from the sides of his mouth before throwing his cup aside.

“im fine.” he stated coldly, fiercely making his way towards you.

taesan shoved past the crowd aggressively causing others to stumble at the determination. the boy grabbed jaehyun’s shoulder, pulling him away from you with much force.

“hey- what the fuck man??” jaehyun shouted, displeased. but it didnt phase taesan, who was busy staring down at the girl.

“youre coming with me.” he growled, causing you to raise your eyebrows in shock.

taesan grabbed your wrist, making his way through the crowd as he yanked you with him.

“hey!- hey taesan- ow! stop!!” you shouted, although taesan paid no attention to your discomfort.

or tell me does he know where your heart lies?

y/n took a deep breath of crisp air when finally out of the crowd, gazing around curiously in attempt to identify where they were headed.

“slow down tae!” you exclaim, drunkly struggling to keep up with his pace.

it all happened so fast.

taesan grabbed the bathroom door, yanking it open as he pulled you inside and shoved you up against the wall. the taller then slammed his hands on either side of your head, causing a small flinch.

you would be lying if you said you hadn’t found this action deadly attractive.

“what the fuck was that stunt you pulled over there?” taesan questioned, cocking his head to the side in a taunting way.

“what are you talking about? why does it matter to you.” y/n hissed back, gazing into taesans eyes daringly.

your reply only infuriated him more, lifting a hand from the wall as he harshly grabbed your face, a sound in surprise escaping past your glossed lips.

“fuck. you drive me crazy.”

with that, taesans lips came crashing down onto yours. the two shared a heated, yet passionate and longing kiss. a kiss full of desire, and desperation. it was different from all your other kisses. a good different.

“i want you, y/n. shit i want you so bad.” taesan muttered into the kiss as you felt the butterflies fluttering in your stomach.

god this boy will be the death of you.

taesan wrapped his free arm around your waist, grazing and touching you as much as he could as his hand landed on your ass, giving it a tight squeeze. y/n knit her eyebrows, moaning into the messy kiss and arching her back in response.

“then have me. for real.” you replied, causing him to pull away. your eyes trailed down to his swollen lips, seeing your tinted lip gloss smeared all over his chin. it was quite a sight to see.

taesan stood quiet, his heavy eyes gazing into the girls as nothing but the muffled booming music and their heavy breaths echoing through their ears.

“youre mine, l/n y/n.” taesan finally stated. “youre mine, and no one else’s. you hear me?” the male spoke, his hand tugging your face closer to his.

y/n nodded in response, a playful smile over her lips. “i hear you han taesan.”

where it truly lies.

— nari ¨̮

#ˋ ୨୧ ˊTAGS !

[erieautumnskies]

(This will be constantly updated!)

About Me:

My name is Claire but you can call me Eri or Echo! I go by they/them pronouns (also found in my bio). I'm an 20 year old based in the United States.

Since I was young, art and writing have played a major role in my life. Hense, it has been a passion of mine that I'm endlessly turning back to. I'm currently studying creative writing, book publishing, and graphic design online; later hoping to study art history and print production. If I could, I'd indulge in every form of art that there is. I deeply enjoy helping other indie writers and creatives alike out in their journey, from ARC reading to showcasing their small business'!

To date, my poetry has been published in 100+ magazines and lit journals across the globe, in 14+ countries overall. I plan on releasing 4+ poetry/prose chapbooks, so keep an eye out for any updates regarding them! Moreover, I'm in the process of writing a few novels in an array of genres, sneak peaks of the stories may be shone!

You can find out more about me on my Website as well as on Instagram, Pinterest, and Spotify.

Languages I know: English (native), Vietnamese, Thai, Norwegian, Irish, Japanese, Hebrew, Czech, Indonesian, Hungarian, Hindi, Finnish, Ukrainian, Italian, Icelandic, Arabic, French, Malayalam, Swahili, and Swedish.

Languages learning: ASL, Korean, Mandarin, Urdu and Spanish.

Some of my favorite things: Rainy days, any kind of tea, flowers, exploring, the night sky, sunsets/sunrises, bookstores, cozy coffeeshops, nature walks, old books, sweaters, making art, creating playlists, volunteering, and learning about other cultures!

Fun Facts: I have undiagnosed ADHD, dyslexia, am queer identifying, gender non-conforming, and practice Shintō.

Blog:

Erie Autumn Skies will center around creativity and where I find inspiration. Expect postcard-poems, letters of prose, possible short stories, translated works of original poems, artwork, and so forth! I may post book reviews and travel photos now and then, too! This will be a writeblr blog and a personal blog! I am open to tag games, asks, etc. as long as they are writing related.

I'm open to DMs and collaborations if you ever want to chat or write together! Everything is okay to reblog. However, no resharing my work outside of Tumblr without my permission. Additionally, I'm open to requests for short poems as long as the prefered theme is included in your request and credit is given wherever the poem is shared.

WIPs:

Poetry Chapbooks

Fiction Novels

Colorblock Interlude

Book Recs:

Winterwood by Shea Ernshaw

The Littlest Tea Shop in Lower by J. Lofton

The Mirror Visitor Quartet by Christelle Dablos

Secrets & Stars by Alix Klingenberg

Sakura Park by Bailey Rae

And numerous others!

Pov My Pinterest Feed:

All original posts will be tagged under erieautumn! Tag games will be tagged under erieautumn tags. Asks are under erieautumn asks.

It was nice to meet you! Happy to have you along on my creative journey and hang around for as long as you'd like! 🌸

[funwithchickenjane]

did someone say speculative wlw !!

Amatka - Karin Tidbeck: a bizarre, poetic swedish dystopian where the heart of the novel is a heartbreakingly beautiful romance between two housemates.

Fractured Fairy Tales - Alix E Harrow: what if you were sleeping beauty and the evil queen was a milf? silly style but heartfelt fairy tale retellings. (series of novellas)

Jane Unlimited - Kristin Cashore: in an ode to creepy classic lit, one bisexual will face several speculative iterations of a mystery in a mansion. imagine glass onion with more dimensions.

Kissing the Witch - Emma Donoghue: lesbian fairy tale retellings, but this time it's a little sexier and a little more grim(m).

Our Lady of Endless Worlds - Lina Rather: lesbian nuns in space 2, but more the vibes of the nuns in the sound of music breaking the nazi cars. (series of novellas)

The Singing Hills Cycle - Nghi Vo : one (1) nonbinary monk collects the stories of the hottest, gayest women to walk the face of the (kind of?) jianghu. (series of novellas)

Siren Queen - Nghi Vo: evelyn hugo adjacent, but with like 300% more monsters, magic, and literal devil deals. exquisite vibes.

Small Game - Blair Braverman: horror/survival lesbians in a survival reality show gone wrong. not very super spec fic, but. i love them.

The Space Between Worlds - Micaiah Johnson: parallel universe exploration workplace lesbians. takes a long stroll through some very fun genres while uncovering the truth of their world.

Spear - Nicola Griffith: arthurian lesbians.

also, not strictly wlw (not suggesting nonbinary characters are women lite) but playing around in the gender and sexuality are complex sandbox in a way some lesbians (me) might enjoy:

Upright Women Wanted - Sarah Gailey: lesbian! librarian! cowboys!! in a wild west dystopia!!

The Salt Grows Heavy - Cassandra Khaw: very dark little mermaid retelling that digs with both hands into the body horror and weird fiction pit.

Litenverse - Nino Cipri : what if ikea contained portals to another world. and what if your coworker was your very recent ex. (series of novellas)

I feel like I’ve been able to read so many speculative fiction wlw books in the past few years that I get a little frustrated when ppl complain that wlw relationships are always sidelined in stories. So I’m just gonna make a list of the ones I’ve completed, for posterity. There are so many interesting books out there and all of these deserve more attention.

To reiterate, this is speculative fiction (sci-if/fantasy) where the primary relationship is wlw.

Ash: Chinese and fae influenced retelling of Cinderella (+Huntress, a prequel)

A Restless Truth: historical magical murder mystery set on a Titanic sister-ship. This is the second book in a series but my favorite so far

Burning Roses: European fairy-tale/Chinese legend mashup featuring older ladies

Cinderella is Dead: YA fairy tale dystopia

Crier’s War: human x android enemies to lovers political intrigue

Even Though I Knew the End: supernatural detective noir, super quick and super fun

In the Vanisher’s Palace: Viet influenced Beauty and the Beast where the Beast is a dragon lady

Juniper Harvey and the Vanishing Kingdom: middle school age mythological fantasy adventure, I wish I had this growing up

Labyrinth Lost: bruja fantasy underworld adventure

Legends and Lattes: Simple and sweet DND inspired cafe AU

Once and Future: King Arthur but in space with ladies. Wish this one had been poly

Roots of Chaos series: high fantasy with dragons and so many queers.

Strictly No Heroics: the struggles of villain henchmen

The Abyss Surrounds us/The Edge of the Abyss: kaiju pirates, enemies to lovers

The Locked Tomb: wlw necromancers in space. Enemies to ???

The Luminous Dead: spelunking thriller set on another planet—this one is fucky everyone should read it

The Memory Librarian: short stories set in Janelle Monae’s android world

The Red Scholar’s Wake: space pirates, enemies to lovers, human x spaceship

The Space Between Worlds: inter dimensional corporate exploitation, handler x agent mutual pining, this one is so underappreciated

The Witch and the Vampire: YA vampire x vampire hunter

This is How You Lose the Time War: everyone knows this one

If you have any others please add, I’m always looking to grow my reading list

[abbynx]

Gotham Edward Nygma with a bubbly lab partner

Genre: Platonic, because I can't pass up an opportunity to give Eddie a good bestie who gives him good influence, headcanons

Warning: Cursing, violence, it is Gotham baby

A/N: So my definition of bubbly maybe borders on being one of those girls (keep in mind, I always writing in gender neutral, this is just how I describe it) who are extremely outgoing, maybe I can hear them talking with a valley girl accent, girly, maybe a bit of a fashionista, always limping their wrist, uttering slangs, unexpectedly smart— I love these type of people.

So this is perhaps a Pre-season 1-season 1 kinda thing and may deviate from the show so ye.

Ed: "What's yours but others use it more? Your name. I-Im Edward Nygma um... Nice to meet you! Mx. L/N..."

- You adopted him, there's no other way of seeing it. Upon meeting with him, then and there you decided to adopt him.

You, internally:

You externally: Nice to meet you too, Eddie :D

- Eddie has a lot to get used to— for example you were extremely chatty person. Admittedly it can be very annoying to him, but he got used to it. Besides, you never did have him a nasty look if he were sharing "stupid riddles and theories" with you, in fact you always encourage him to go off.

- He never realised it before, but being allowed to finish a sentence without being given the stink-eye was refreshing to him! He loves how engaged you are with the conversation and though sometimes you miserably fail at riddles, you still try your best! And he loves how you don't get butthurt when you don't answer his riddles correctly.

- "What has an ear but unable to hear?" Edward waits for you to consider for a moment, his smile widening at the moment your face lit up.

"Hmm... Newborn puppy!" You were particularly proud of your answer, having been quicker than usual to come up with an answer.

"The answer was ear of a corn, but technically you are correct!"

"Awww yiee!"

- Okay but the first few times he goes off into a tangent, rambling on and on, he would look sheepish and apologize. And you know we are not going to let Eddie feel apologetic because he is talking about his interests 😤

"Eddie, honey, you can chant the alphabet three letter back or forward with the Swedish chef from the Muppets' accent and I will still encourage you to go on."

- Calling him cute petnames admittedly makes him blush, but then realises you do this with everyone.

- If you are into make up and into practicing on other people... Eddie wouldn't protest.

"Ohhhh.... This shade of green looks lovely on you, sweetie... Omg with the winged eyeliner too, sharp and can cut a man! So do you like Genieva red or Abigayle pink?"

Ed raises furrows a brow in confusion. "But those are not shades of colours?"

You gasp out, as if having an epiphany. "Omg, what if we mix it? Then put a gloss on top? OH! Can I paint your nails? I mean... Ugh, omg I forgot it might violate regulations but LIKE hypothetically, would you?"

"Uh... Of course! What colour?"

- When you found out about the workplace bullying that takes place in the precinct... Oh boy...

"Either green or black or purple, or all of it! I've been watching a lot of nail art online! It is SO gorgeous and it seems doable—"

- If you're into fashion and adores styling people... Edward wouldn't protest if you gave him fashion advice or drag him in a store to be your personal dress-up doll.

"Omg, so you give off dark academia vibes, but like... I want to see you in more vibrant colours, green specifically so what if like..." You pull a white button-up shirt, a brown knitted sweater before running off to get a green necktie from another stand of the store before shoving it in his arms. "Here! I'll be waiting!"

He had no time to process anything, before you shove him in the dressing room. Having no qualms with your request, he shrugs and indulges you, and came out of the dressing room with the clothes you have chosen for him.

"OMG!" you excitedly clap at the sight of him. "You know what else would look cute? Or hot? Like, try folding the sleeves up to your elbow, mhhm, like that... Omg! Perfect! Can I see it without the necktie?"

It honestly raises his confidence and appreciate how you implore him to dress more stylishly.

"Listen here you catterpillar-having-eyebrows, women's-touch deprived, egotistical testicle— without Edward around here, your workforce is only effective by one percent." You turn away from the shocked officer only to then snatch equally shocked Eddie away from the scene, almost skipping off. "C'mon! I found like the best moisturizer yesterday let's test it out!"

- You are always roped into the little mess in the precinct, aka, sneaking behind the Medical Examiner's back and do the autopsy yourselves. At first you are hesitant and tried to talk him out of it, and he respects that... Then you realise how much details the Medical Examiner missed on previous investigations, and that convinced you to accompany Mister Nygma on these medical endeavours.

- "Forensic examination by Edward Nygma,"

"And Y/N L/N," Edward hands you the device and you cheerfully spoke on it, as if you're hosting a radio station channel..

"At exactly eight forty two AM, at GCPD morgue. It is approximately ninety three degree—"

"One hundred and ninety nine Fahrenheit." You cut in with a grin after snatching the device from Edward. He only smiles at the shared enthusiasm as you handed it back to him.

"I ate half a cranberry muffin earlier, saving the rest for later." He then passes the recording device to you again.

"I didn't eat because I'm on a diet today."

- You two were caught, but not after finding myriads of details. You hated how Eddie did not stand his ground, as you assume into position to chastise the current medical examiner, when Ed left and all you wanted to do was to console him instead of wasting your breath on the sloppy ignoramus.

- He appreciates the fact that you're there to appreciate him, reminding him how much of a good job he's done and cursing people at the fact that they forget to thank him.

"Like... Detective Bullock is a dick, yeah? Don't listen to him and keep telling your riddles. FYI, he is totes jel that you're waaaay smarter than him." He slightly winced at your usage of a vulgar word, but he did not allow that overshadow the amount of praises he's been getting from you. "So anyways, I replaced all ink cartridges in his pens with almost empty ones."

"Oh..." Ed panders outloud. So that's why there's a random stack of ink cartridges on your desk, unorganized.

- There are times when certain officers assume that your bubbly and airheaded nature is a proxy to your intelligence and capabilities, and it was insulting. You try not to let it get to you, as you assure your bestie that you're okay. At the beginning of the friendship, Ed doesn't pry further because he truly does believe you're okay— you're a self-assured genius who knows their worth and so he lets you be... But the longer you've been friends, he knows you're lying.

"What is the saddest fruit?"

"Durian because people judge them by their exterior and scent and throw them away without seeing their insides and eating it..."

"Correct!" The answer was blueberry, but he lets you be because it made you slightly smile. "Would you like to get some snacks with me? Also, there's a new cosmetic store that opened up if you would like—"

- As you can see, he is bad with emotions and he wishes he can cheer you up the way you do to him, but it felt insincere of him. And, you can see that and you appreciate him for trying his best.

- Oh the amount of names given to you on the precinct... Bobblehead, airhead, dumbo, that one h/c idiot— it was upsetting how they call you this behind your back.

- Maybe at some point, Ed thinks he has fallen for you. His thought process goes along the lines like this, "I love them... I think I'm in love with them... Am I? I mean, I do love them, but I don't see myself kissing them... Is this what love feels like?"

The moment he resolved this dilemma is when he slipped and fell while you walk on the jcey sidewalks. Instead of helping him out, you burst out of laughing. It was funny because he didn't feel offended by it, in fact, he started to laugh with you too. Wanting to pull you into it, he pulls on your ankle causing you to fall as well.

There, he realised he didn't want to change your relationship.

- Everyone in the precinct saw your friendship as unlikely— they were judgemental to think you would be more likely to befriend the party people in the precinct instead of sticking around the bookish nerd that is Eddie.

- Even Eddie thought of that and when confronted about it, he couldn't help but to shed a tear of two.

"I don't know what goes around that head of yours to think that I'm only hanging out with your because I pity you, well that's wrong. I genuinely like your company and I wouldn't trade it for anything."

Ed's face soften, allowing the reservoir in his eyes to open and when he felt the first drop, he removes his glasses and feverishly swiped it off with the cuff of his sleeves. "Sorry Y/N um... It's just that... I've never heard that from someone before... Referring to me..."

"Awww, Eddie! C'mere," you pull him to your chest and allowed his tears to soak through your clothes. You ran a soothing hand on his back. "How 'bout we go to that one Chinese place you've been wanting to try, then after that lets go to my house to test out some new mud masks."

- The both of you are on both ends of a spectrum of socialising, and he knows how much of an outgoing person you are. He feels guilty whenever you turn down invitations from coworkers to attend a social gathering because you excuse yourself to hang out with him.

- Playful banter on the daily and it is top tier

- You being an absolute wingman and impulse control for Mister Riddleman.

"Okay, so you tell her that she smells nice, WITHOUT sniffing her neck, mkay?"

"But how would I know if she smells nice?"

"Then her perfume is totes ripping her off."

Or alternatively:

"Heyyy, Eddie, buddy, honey... Mind if you tone it down with Kringle before you get a lawsuit—"

- Okay whether you hate or like Kringle, you will snap at her if her judgements are uncalled for.

"I don't get how you can stand him, Mx. L/N—"

"Maybe because he and I are on the same level of intellect. Low IQ's tend to be annoyed at what they cannot understand." You say under your breath, but loud enough for her to hear.

Kristen blinks owlishly at you, and indignantly says, "I'm sorry—"

- Ed is a stubborn nut when he was pursuing Kristen, it was getting out of hand. He was ignoring you and ignoring Kristen's discomfort that you had to step in and put it for him bluntly:

"You are forgiven. Now, could you please hand me the files I've been asking for?"

Or alternatively:

"He is such a freak..."

"People label things with negativity when they don't understand it."

"Hey Ed, I don't think Kristen will bite—"

"You speak of her as if she's a mere fish I'm trying to catch, I'm not—"

"That's not the point! It's honestly painful to watch you get rejected and how uncomfortable she looks when you try to pursue her! Didn't it occur to you why she surrounds herself with towering buff guys from work?" He stares at you, his hardened face softening as time goes by. "There's a line between being persevering and asking for a harassment report— fuck it, make it a restraining order! If you continue chasing something that isn't worth it, you're just throwing your life away all for a girl who doesn't care!"

That hit him hard and had him speechless. It's not worth it. Why did he do it? He doesn't know, he thought she was a lovely woman, but now he realises how right you are.

"Do you understand what I'm telling you, Eddie?"

"Yes... I'm sorry..." He sighs.

"Don't apologize to me, go to Kristen. Then after that, let's not harass her again." You take him in your arms and he immediately found solace within your warmth. "There's a sweet calling my name back home, but I'm sharing it with you because you're my bestie. Also, I just received my face mask package from Korea, so we can try them out—"

- A lot of people thought you were a couple, there will always be people who will say that the two of you look cute together. And honestly, they are right, but both of you consider each other as platonic soulmates.

- In this verse, the Abbynxverse, maybe Eddie would not stray to become the Riddler because honestly, with a bestie like you, he cannot imagine you being scared and disappointed in him. You keep him sane, feel like the best version of himself and just feels great.

[torillatavataan]

#have no clue what convo is about #but video is lit lmao #also accurate

“Self-pitying ballads”, a Finnish music genre and how it’s simply not possible to make one that’s “too much”. Any attempt to parody it will just result in a hit. Just like with noir detective stories, so the two genres should be combined.

A famous example of an attempt to parody a self-pitying ballad is Pasila’s (Finnish animated sitcom) Karrelle palanut enkeli (basically Charred Angel, but not 100% direct translation):

Rai rai rai rai rai...

Vaimoani heikkouttani liian kovaa löin Lauteilla hän vielä lepäs’ saunamakkaraa kun söin Silloin sivusilmälläin nuo liekit roihuavat näin Vaimo vietiin paikkaan parempaan mä tänne yksin jäin

Out of weakness, I hit my wife too hard She still rested on the sauna benches While I ate a sausage [prepared on the sauna stove] Then from the corner of my eye, I saw those blazing flames Wife was taken to a better place, I was left here all alone

Sinne hiilenmusta enkelini lentää Hiljaa liitää yli miehen murtuneen Niin se menee ymmärrän vaan herrat ymmärrä mua ei Kaikkeni mä yritin silti veivät pellot työn ja talonkin

To that place my charcoal-black angel flies Slowly/soundlessly glides above the broken man That’s how it goes, I understand, but the sirs do not understand me * I gave it my all, regardless they took the fields, the job, and even the house

Rai rai rai rai rai...

Olen yksinäinen susi mutta lauman tarvitsen Olen kivi joka kukkii lailla hauraan joutsenen Jalat vievät helvettiin minä katson taivaaseen Sieltä hiilenmusta enkelini alas hymyilee

I’m a lone wolf, but I need a pack I’m a stone that blooms like a fragile swan Feet are taking me to hell, I look up into the heavens From there my charcoal-black angel smiles down upon me

Siellä hiilenmusta enkelini lentää Hiljaa liitää yli miehen murtuneen Niin se menee ymmärrän vaan herrat ymmärrä mua ei Uhri olen itsekin talven routa tappaa pihatontutkin

There my charcoal-black angel flies Slowly/soundlessly glides above the broken man That’s how it goes, I understand, but the sirs do not understand me * I’m a victim myself, too, the winter frost kills even the garden gnomes

Rai rai rai rai rai...

Sinne hiilenmusta enkelini lentää Hiljaa liitää yli miehen murtuneen Niin se menee ymmärrän vaan herrat ymmärrä mua ei Kaikkeni mä yritin silti veivät pellot työn ja talonkin

To that place my charcoal-black angel flies Slowly/soundlessly glides above the broken man That’s how it goes, I understand, but the sirs do not understand me * I gave it my all, regardless they took the fields, the job, and even the house

Rai rai rai rai rai...

Rai rai rai is like la la la, but especially associated with drunken singing.

* “herrat” aka sirs, masters, lords. Those with money, influence, and power in society. The general public’s hatred for “herrat” comes from times of past oppression. The ruling class in Finland used to be Swedish, so that adds to an extra othering factor to “herrat”.

Suomalainen itsesääliballadi on kyllä niin upea genre siitä että se on täysin järkähtämätön. Ei ole fyysisesti mahdollista tehdä siitä niin naurettavaa överiksi vedettyä parodiaa ettei löytyisi ainakin viisi suomalaista jotka epäironisesti fiilaa tätä kappaletta, Tuhansien surullisten laulujen maa yritti, mutta jopa Pasilan mahtava Karrelle palanut enkeli olisi voinut olla hitti jos sitä olisi soitettu vakavissaan radiosta.

Siinä mielessä se on genrenä melkein rinnakkaislaji överimacholle power metallille. Siinä vaiheessa kun on jo lyöty yli niin jarrut on vaan tiellä ja on parempi tähdätä lähimpään seinään kovimmalla pamauksella minkä vaan saa aikaan, pelkästään tylsillä ihmisillä on aikaa pohtia että onko tämä mahdollisesti noloa.

Balls to the wall and unfortunately I cannot be stopped.

[nenko-dreams]

Thank you @seethemflying for tagging me!

And here are 5 books I plan to read this year:

1. Bot by Max Kidruk. One summer I've visited every damn bookstore in Lviv trying to get this book but I couldn't find it anywhere. Recently I gave up and downloaded epub version and I can't wait to get into it even if technothriller is not the genre I usually tend to read.

2. First Blood by David Morrell. Since Rambo First Blood is one of my favourite action movies, I couldn't go without reading the book it was based on. I managed to get an old second hand copy of this book, I started reading and then I lost the book. I found it two years later in my travelling bag and I hope I'll finish it soon.

3. The Martian by Andy Weir. I took the copy of this book from a dusted shelf in a place I was having my summer internship thinking that no one would read it anyway. Well, now I have to do it.

4. The Girl in the Spider's Web by David Lagercrantz (original title in Swedish: Det som inte dödar oss, lit. 'That which does not kill us' I have no idea who comes up with such titles in English). It is the fourth novel in the Millennium series about Lisbeth Salander and Mikael Blomkvist. The first three books were written by Stieg Larsson and I absolutely adore them. After his death the series was continued by David Lagercrantz and this is probably the reason why I'm postponing reading it as I don't trust the new author with that story.

5. The Quantum Thief by Hannu Rajaniemi. This book was highly recommend to me on my first serious date. It was over seven years ago and I still haven't read it. But I plan to. I definitely do!

I'm going to tag @pettania @nightreaderenigma and anyone who'd like to do it!

[pom-hello]

And You Shall Sleep in Peace // Chapter 2: Sheathed in Scarlet

Summary (excerpt included below):

Two hundred years after Swedish rule in Finland begins, it becomes clear that Tino is dying.

Yes, Tino is dying, and it is Berwald's fault. He had been there when the conquest had begun, and he is still here now, watching the one he has grown to care for grow sicker and sicker as the final flickers of Finnish resistance are snuffed out. It is for the good of the Swedish people, the officials of his government say to placate him, but he has not been able to believe that lie for a while. Not when they summon him time after time to lead the cavalry into a battle that is never a battle, but a massacre; not when he always emerges the victor and never the vanquished.

Not when he returns to Tino and hears the muted anguish in his voice, sees the pallor of his skin and the deepening shadows under his eyes.

No, he finally vows. He cannot stand by. He cannot let this happen. He cannot let Tino and his people be struck from this world.

But two hundred years have passed, and the damage might well be irreversible.

Link: AO3

Status: 2/4 chapters up. In progress and updating every Thursday!

Pairing: Sweden/Finland

Word count: 2684

Genre and rating: historical, drama, romance, angst; teen and up

Excerpt from Chapter 2:

He straightens his back and opens his tired eyes, and he strides forward and through the gates. Through the grand front entryway and up the stairs, his steps echoing in the still and silent air.

They are watching him, he knows. They are unsure of what he will do, for he has returned. He has defied orders.

Berwald pays them no heed. He is here for them no longer.

And then he stops before that door. He raises a hand and knocks.

Once, twice, three times.

But there is no sound from within, so he knocks again.

Still nothing.

Cautiously, he gives the panel of wood a push—

—and steps back in surprise when it gives, swinging into the space beyond.

“…Tino?” he calls softly. “Are you awake?”

When there is no response, he takes one step forward, and another, and another, and another, the floorboards creaking under his careful tread. The room is dimly lit; a single candle burns in its holder, placed atop the nightstand. Tino lies on his back under the covers, hands palm-up atop the blankets. His hair glints dully in the candlelight.

It is quiet. Too quiet.

A note: Half of the inspiration from this story came from the AusHun story “Full Circle” by the wonderful @yudonomi! The other half comes from a very obscure song, which shall be revealed in time :D

[x--daughters-of-darkness--x]

Amaranthe’s Elize Ryd: ‘You cannot take music forward if you sound like everyone else’

Amaranthe’s Elize Ryd is unashamed of her band’s metal-goes-Eurovision sound. But behind the bombastic tunes lies personal tragedy

Elize Ryd grew up in the Swedish Bible Belt in Värnamo, a small, picturesque town dotted with churches, two hours from Gothenburg, where heavy music was the devil. “To be a metal fan was… well, people had their opinions,” she says today, chatting animatedly down the phone to Metal Hammer as she recalls her journey from Sweden’s conservative centre, to genre-hopping melodic metallers Amaranthe.

Despite the outrage of their neighbours, the Ryd family worshipped fervently at the altar of the riff. Elize’s father was a hard rock lover who played bass, while her mother was a singer/songwriter who listened to punk. Like most kids, Elize lapped up the pop music and Eurodance she heard on the radio, nurturing the tastes that would go on to inform Amaranthe’s dynamic blend of metal, synth pop and euphoric EDM. But it was her older brother and metaller, Johan Carlzon, vocalist in local doom band Abandon, who ‘schooled’ her in metal and alternative rock.

“The first three years of a baby’s life is where you shape that person to what it will become,” she says. “I think I listened to more metal growing up than other kinds of music.”

When Elize was two years old, Metallica’s tourbus skidded off the road, killing bassist Cliff Burton, just a 20-minute drive from her house. Although she was too young to remember the accident, she can recall the impact it had on Johan, who was a massive Metallica fan. From then onwards, he was determined to impress on her the importance of Cliff and the music he had stood for, buying Elize her first metal album – The Black Album on cassette – followed by albums by Queen, Kiss and Maiden.

“I’m forever grateful that he introduced me to metal,” Elize says. “I went to his concerts when I was seven or eight years old, sitting on my mother’s shoulders.”

Surrounded by music throughout her childhood, Elize quickly set her sights on becoming a singer. In 2004, she enrolled on a three-year course at Gothenburg’s Performing Arts School and began laying down guest vocals for local power metallers Falconer and Dreamland. But two years later, things really kicked up a notch when she met Amaranthe’s Olof Mörck, then the guitarist in power metal band Dragonland, in a nightclub.

“He knew my brother, everyone knew my brother,” she says. “He was a local celebrity because he was so great at growling. I think he was impressed I was the little sister of this extreme metal growler.”

Olof was just as impressed with Elize’s powerful voice, though. And when he heard Nightwish were seeking a new singer to replace Tarja Turunen, who had been fired from the band in 2005, he secretly sent over the tapes of Elize’s Dragonland and Falconer guest vocals.

“It was the one of the nicest things anyone had ever done for me,” laughs Elize. “I was very shy, I would never have sent in my audition tape. He said, ‘Let’s try and see what happens, and if they don’t like it, we start our own band.” Much to her shock though, the symphonic giants were interested, and responded, asking her to record demo vocals for two tracks, Nemo and I Wish I Had An Angel.

The gig eventually went to Anette Olzon, who fronted Nightwish from 2007-2012, but although Elize was disappointed, she was far from disheartened by the decision. “That lit up a fire inside of me,” she says. “I didn’t sing opera and thought, ‘Maybe I’m not the best for them’, but when they announced Annette as the singer, I got it. They didn’t want an opera singer. They were interested in my voice; that meant my voice might not be so wrong for this.”

Energised, she and Olaf started recording the material that would go on to be Amaranthe’s 2009 EP, Leave Everything Behind, but as they were finishing the songs, Elize was dealt a devastating blow; her brother had passed away after an overdose. He was just 32 years old. “It was unconsciously based around making my brother proud,” Elize says of her decision to pursue a career in metal. “I wanted to carry on the legacy of him. I [felt I] was staying in contact with him through the music.”

Elize and Olof initially posted the early Amaranthe songs to MySpace, attracting the attention of their first record label, Spinefarm, who signed them in 2010 and released their first five albums. The tracks also grabbed the lugs of power metallers Kamelot, who invited Elize to join them on their 2012 US tour as a backing vocalist – supporting Nightwish. “It was a surreal situation,” she says. “I didn’t dare remind them of the audition so I don’t know if they remembered.”

On the evening of September 28 2012, as the tour rolled into Denver, Anette was taken ill and rushed to hospital just a few hours before showtime. With the Ogden Theatre packed with 1,600 expectant fans, Nightwish asked Elize if she would fill in on vocals. “I remembered the songs I recorded for my audition tape, but I wasn’t so sure about the other ones,” she remembers, revealing she was so nervous she asked Alissa White-Gluz, now current Arch Enemy singer, who was also on the tour providing backing vocals for Kamelot, to join her. The singers had just 55 frantic minutes to learn the setlist, and took to the stage with the lyrics written on sheets of paper. “We were thinking the audience would be very disappointed, but they wanted so bad to hear the band play,” she says. “The mood was amazing.”

Since then, although Elize is still most comfortable as part of an ensemble – she’s one third of a vocal trio in Amaranthe, alongside growler Henrik Englund Wilhelmsson and new recruit, Nils Molin – she’s grown in confidence. “We have a superhero theme with the new album [Amaranthe’s sixth album, Manifest] and this is exactly what it means,” she says. “You overcome your fears, you do things you never think you would do, or be able to do.”

Sonically too, Manifest is the band’s most assured effort yet, taking their vivid, yet undoubtedly divisive, pop metal to the next level and turning their gigantic hooks and sparkling choruses up to skyscraper levels. And while the purists can sneer, Elize insists the band are bringing something new to the table.  

“I haven’t heard anyone say it’s cheesy,” she argues when we ask how fans have reacted to the overblown nature of their music. “We want to give people an endorphin kick. You cannot take music forward if you try and sound the same as everyone else.”

Over half a decade of slow burn experimentation, Amaranthe have arrived at a sound that would fit as much competing at Eurovision as it would on the Download Fest line-up. This is perhaps unsurprising, given both Elize and Nils have competed in the competition – Elize in 2015, with opera singer Rickard Söderberg, and Nils in 2011, with his band Dynazty. Neither made the live finals, but Elize agrees it’s something Amaranthe would definitely be open to in the future. “People have opinions, [like] you shouldn’t sell yourself to ‘corporate things’, but we are giving people a gift,” she enthuses. “If we did Eurovision, we would give people something great they didn’t even know existed.”

[blazinbeautywrites]

Band Wars: Rise of the Phoenix

Note: Due to the rampant uprising of plagiarism on this site and others I am stating once and once only that this is my ORIGINAL work. If I find out that you have stolen/taken any part of my work I will handle you and the situation the way I see fit.

None of the pics or gifs I use belong to me so full credit goes to the originators of said gifs and pics.

Length: 2,356 words

A/N: Sorry it took me so long to get this out guys. I was not happy with the final results and when I was I still was unsure so I rewrote it again and decided to just post it. I’ll let yall be the judge lol.

Genre: Honestly idk lmao

Chapter 1

 Universal Music Group (UMG) decides to debut a new girl group, PHOENIX on their first ever reality show “Next Big Thing.” The winners of the show get a 5 year, 5 album recording contract and will tour with CNCO 1 year after they debut. The winner of the show was Zania Reye Bloom, followed by London Monroe Jones, Jolene Maria Sanchez, Siane Rei Choi, and Avery Lynn O'Reilly. The band is composed of 5 talented women with different ethnic backgrounds, ages 24-25. 

Since the show served as the girl’s training they were immediately thrusted into the spotlight after the show ended. They went to work on their debut album and as the release date approached the girls were getting antsy. Now only were they about to release their baby onto the world, but they were finally meeting CNCO today and discussing ideas for their tour.

*UMG headquarters in LA*

“Yoooo I’m fucking excited! Can yall believe our debut album is coming out in a couple days?” London said as she led a couple of her members to the elevators.

“Girl this tour bout to be lit as fuck. Bruuuh we’re going to fucking Sweden. I didn’t even think we had fans out there.” Zania said.

“Yeah you can thank that girl Astrid who made the finals. She was Swedish.” Avery said.

The girls finally heard the elevator ding at their floor and immediately got out. The girls walked into a meeting room where they saw their other 2 members Jolene and Siane bonding with the boys of CNCO.

“Finally you bitches show up. What took yall so long?” Siane asked.

“Avery thinks she’s still in Ireland and almost drove us into a damn ditch.” Zania said.

“You’re alive aren’t you? So quit complaining.” Avery said as she took a seat opposite Erick.

“Anyways if yall are done….THIS is CNCO ladies. This is Zabdiel, Christopher, Erick, Joel, and this is Richard.” Siane said as she pointed to each boy as she introduced them. Richard definitely caught Zania’s eye and she quickly averted her eyes so he wouldn’t catch her ogling him. Little did she know, he was checking her out too.

“And I’m Zania, and of course yall met Jolene and Siane. This is London and Avery.” She said as she gestured to her other bandmates. She was about to say something else when a tall, slender woman walked into the room followed by a man wearing the loudest shade of yellow and another woman dressed in all black.

“Okay let’s make this short and sweet. I’m Veronica Pierce, you can call me Vee or Ms. Pierce, never Veronica. Get it? Got it? Good. I am your tour  creative director. I’ll be working closely with you all to design your tour. And please, let’s all collectively agree on a specific concept. I will not have my people designing 2 separate stages. To my left is Chez Moa, your set designer. And to my right is Mel Carter she and her team will be styling you all so meet with her some time this week so she can get an idea of what you guys want and need. And ladies you have a busy weekend ahead. Friday you have your album release, press runs, then your album release party later that night. Saturday you’ll be on Good Day LA where you’ll be interviewed and then perform your lead single. Sunday you have a mini showcase where yall will perform some fan fave covers from the show and a few songs from the album, including your single with CNCO. You’ll have tomorrow, Wednesday, and Thursday to learn choreo for both performances. You’ll meet your choreographer tomorrow. Any questions?” 

The whole room was silent as both groups stared at Veronica and her associates. Zania raised her hand and the other members of Phoenix sighed. They knew how this shit was about to play out.

“So do we get to breathe? Or do we have to pencil that in too?” Zania asked. She knew she was being an asshole but this shit was ridiculous.

“Hmmmm you must be Zania Bloom. They told me you had a mouth on you. Listen up sweetie this my show. I call the shots and if they bother you, you can leave.” Veronica said. Zania smirked at her and leaned back in her chair.

“Nah I’m good. You may continue, Ms. Pierce.” Zana said. Sarcasm dripping from her words.

“Anyways that’s all for now. And remember this is a once in a lifetime opportunity. It can be taken away in the blink of an eye so watch yourselves.” Veronica spoke. She eyed the room but everyone knew exactly who that was meant for. She, Mel, and Chez exited the room in silence. Once they left, Siane burst out laughing.

“Yo I was clenching my fucking ass cheeks. She’s soo fucking hot.” Siane said.

“Keep it in your pants Siane. And Zania, girl why did you do that? You made that shit more intense than it needed to be.” London asked.

“You know me, I just had to say something. She was a bitch to us when we did the show, now they’re making her the tour director, wtf?” Zania said.

“Am I the only one who noticed that guy had on too much yellow?” Chris said. Everyone turned to him and started laughing.

“Look, I ain’t wanna say anything but he was so wrong for that. And it was a complete contrast to Mel who had on all black.” Jolene said.

“But real shit Vee ain’t no joke, she can make or break you. So just be careful.” Richard said. He made eye contact with Zania and she smiled at him.

“Oh I’m not afraid of her. She’s on a power trip so I’ll entertain her mess for the sake of this tour. You don’t have to worry bout me baby boy.” Zania said. Everyone got up to leave but on her way to the door she was stopped by Richard.

“I don’t know if you realized but I’m a grown ass man so that baby boy shit not gon fly with me.” Richard said. Zania was amused.

“Oh did I bruise your whittle ego babe? Look it’s not that serious-”

“But it is that serious so treat me with respect or keep it moving baby girl.” Richard said as he cut her off. He walked away leaving Zania stunned in silence. She walked back to her group and chuckled.

“Yall…...that guy Richard just lowkey put me in my fucking place. Oh this tour is gonna be so damn fun.” Zania said. She and her bandmates went to find their stylists to get started on designing their perfect tour outfits.

                                             ______________

It had been a full 5 hours and the girls were hard at work on their choreo. They were thankful that most of the songs they performed were their covers from their reality show so the moves were ingrained in their heads. They breezed through their choreo for their own singles and just finished running through them a final time before Laurieann Gibson called for lunch. The girls were beyond starved and as they walked to the cafe area of the upscale dance studio they saw CNCO walk through the door.

“Oop the boys are here.” Jolene said as she fixed her slightly messy hair. She made eye contact with Zabdiel as he and the other boys walked into the dance studio they’s just left.

“Ooooohhh do I sense a little crush? London teased.

“See that tall one, Zabdiel? I promise you, I will climb him like a fucking tree.” Jolene said, much to the amusement of her group. 

“Woah. Down girl, we have a whole ass tour to get through.” Avery said.

“Look if I can’t fuck Vee, you can’t fuck Zabdiel.” Siane argued.

“Girl. Zabdiel is fair game, Vee is our fucking boss. There’s a difference.” Zania said as the girls found a table near the back of the cafe. Avery went to order them some food and soon a waiter came back with a tray of fruit, some finger sandwiches, and a basket of the cafe’s homemade potato chips.

“This looks so good and I’m starving.” London said. As the girls ate they discussed the difficult choreo.

“I really thought Laureiann was gonna throw her shoe or some shit at you cuz you couldn’t get that one move down.” Siane said.

“I wish she would throw some shit at me.” Jolene said while the others laughed at her.

“What kind of shit yall think they’ll have us do with the boys?” London asked.

“Probably something sexy, ya kno to pander to the fans.” Avery answered.

“I heard that they’re partnering us up with them for the collab so whomever we pick is our dance partner for the song.” Siane added.

“Well. this should be fun.” Zania said. The girls chat a little bit longer before cleaning up and heading back into the dance studio. When they arrived they heard their song with CNCO playing. Laurieann was teaching them their choreo and once saw the girls she turned the music off and immediately began assigning pairs.

“Okay London you’re with Joel, Jolene with Eric, Zabdiel and Siane, Avery and Chris are partners and lastly, Zania, you’re with Richard. Everyone please stand with your partner. I’m only gonna do the dance two times and then you’re gonna do it and we’ll fine tune everything afterwards” Lauriann said as she read off her list. Before the girls could even process anything they quickly got into formation to do the choreo.

                                            ______________

A few hours later, both Phoenix and CNCO were spread out on the floor, exasperated. Lauriann told them to rest up and that she’d see them in the morning before she left them all a sweaty mess in the studio.

“I swear there are parts of me that are sweating I ain’t know could sweat.” Siane said as she attempted to lift her head to no avail.

“Girl I feel like my fucking feet are gonna fall off.” Zania said.

“I can’t feel my left asss cheek.” Jolene mumbled.

“Bruh at least yall voices aren’t hoarse as fuck.” Richard said.

“We should probably start heading out because I need an ice bath or some shit.” Avery said as she willed her body to move. Everyone followed suit and struggled getting to their feet. When the girls began packing up to leave, Zabdiel strolled on over to pull Jolene to the side. Zania looked on and smirked to herself. All she hoped was that whatever they had going on didn’t get in the way of her group’s path to success. She snapped out of her little daze just as Jolene made it back.

“Well, what was that about?” Zania asked.

“Girl he asked for my number. I was like no and he said can you really say no to this face. I almost fucking melted so I gave him my number. He’s so fucking cocky. I love it.” Jolene beamed. Zania could tell her friend was happy so she chose to keep her mouth shut. The girls finally made it to the elevator when Zania realized she’d left her phone in the dance studio.

“Shut yall I left my phone. Yall go on I’ll text yall once I get home.” Zania said.

“Girl we’ll wait, just hurry up.” London said. Zania jogged back to the building and ran up the stairs to be quicker. Once she got to the door of the studio she heard the boys talking.

“I really like that girl London. She’s classy, yet has a sexy side. I like that.” Joel said.

“Now see Jolene….them lips. I bet her head game on point.” Zabdiel said.

“Ew bro what the hell!” Eric exclaimed.

“I know you of all people are not talking.” Richard said.

“Even though I think she’s kind of a bitch, Zania fine as fuck too.” Christopher said.

“Yeah she is fine. Yall seen that ass? I’d love to get behind that.” Richard said. Zania had heard enough and walked into the room.

“Yall should really make sure that the door is completely closed before you talk about us. Anyways I left my phone and just came back to get it. Oh and Richard, Zabdiel? I understand that Jolene and I are attractive but please don’t talk about us like we’re pieces of meat mkay?” With that she grabbed her phone and walked out, leaving the boys a little dumbfounded. Once she got back outside she filled her girls on what she heard.

“You know. We should teach them a lesson.” Jolene said.

“Oop I sense an infamous Jolene Sanchez prank.” Siane said.

“Yep. Okay so here’s the plan.” Jolene explains the little prank they’ll play on the boys at the showcase. They’d messed with the wrong girls.

                                            _____________

The rest of the week went by in a blur and before they knew it, their album release day was finally here. It’d only been a few hours and their album was already number 1 on a few of the urban and pop album charts. Siane screenshot the Billboard charts where their album was number 1 and sent it to their group chat. She then called them all on a video chat.

“WAKE UP BITCHES! WE NUMBER 1 BABYYYYYY!!!!1!” She yelled into the phone. The others, as groggy as they were, laughed at how hyped their member was.

“Girl you are so lucky I was up getting ready or I’d curse you the fuck out.” Zania said. 

“Bitch whatever. Anyways I love yall so much! We’ve officially ARRIVED! Like we in the fucking building forreal now. WHEW! Let me start getting my shit together. See yall soon. Love ya! Siane said as she hung up the video call. The girls were buzzing and couldn’t be any happier that after almost 6 months, their hard work has finally paid off and that their fans love their album as much as they do. They couldn’t wait to see what lie ahead for them. They knew whatever it was, it was gonna be big.

[cinema-of-cruelty]

MIDSOMMAR (2019)—Ingmar Bergman told me there’d be days like these 

by Cinema of Cruelty • A podcast on Anchor and Spotify

On this week’s annotated deep dive, The Cultists Present Ari Aster’s ‘Midsommar’ (2019). The horror genre has long been a place of shadows. And yet, what happens when those horrors are brought into direct light? Can grief, heartbreak, graduate thesis work, and human sacrifice all still thrive under the warm glowing rays of the midnight sun? Aster’s sophomore film sets forth to find out. As such, London and Benji welcome in the encroaching autumn with a scenic tour through the incredible landscape of Aster’s re-imagined lore-laden fairy tale. (Because nothing says “summer” like downing home grown psychedelics in the warm lit sunshine with a folksy Swedish death cult.)

(Topics include: allusions and inspirations from Swedish folk artists (John Bauer to Hilma af Klint); the challenge of filming in the bright outdoors; and so much Nordic folklore (Ättestupa, the old “blood eagle,” runes, beserkers, and more!)

Episode Safeword: “metropolitan”

[rootsofthepinetree]

It’s astonishing to me how Sweden keeps coming up as the single country outside of the US that just keeps spitting out amazing folk-rock records. There seems to be an engrained culture of respecting the tradition of rootsy music, ranging from the other-worldly finger-picking country-folk of Tallest Man on Earth to the rugged minimalistic folk-blues of Daniel Norgren. However, even though these guys do heavy duty maintenance on the framework of these loosely labeled genres, they manage to cement themselves as unique voices of their own.

The freshest voice coming out of the Swedish folk-factory is the soulful humming of Arvid Nero.

Back in 2019 I had the pleasure of seeing Arvid perform in person at the famed SPOT Festival in Aarhus. Playing in one of the dark-lit concert halls of Aarhus, Arvid’s down to earth, yet confident presence was a strange juxtaposition to the amazing weather and all-around carnival vibe going on outside the walls of the stage. Just as his personality that day, his song ‘Out Of The Blue’ serves as a refreshing contrast to what is being played on the radio these days.

Arvid kicks off with some shy electric guitar, nicely dubbing one of his vocal lines before the drums, bass and electric piano join in, filling the void of one of the tastiest breaks I have heard in a while. There isn’t really more to say about the instrumentation as it stays the same for the rest of the song, but that is in and of itself a major compliment to the songwriting and the presence of mind of his band. There is no overplaying going on from anybody, necessitating other instruments or background vocals to back up the song.

Don’t even get me started on Arvid’s singing. It is so god damn soulful and pleasant. It is in control of the whole thing at all times, it never wanders to places where it doesn’t belong, and the occasional vibrato is all the spice you need to stay engaged in the song.

The experience of listening is so organic, and the way Arvid’s vocals seem to control every move of the band, makes me quite convinced that they recorded this live, which requires real synergy from the band.

Even though I began this review by referencing other Swedish artists before even mentioning Arvid’s name, there is no doubt in my mind that he firmly stands on his own two feet in the whole wide world of singer-songwriters.

‘Out Of The Blue’ is the 3rd song from Arvid Nero’s 2021 album ‘Little White Dove’.

[sweetsmellosuccess]

Sundance 2021: Days 6 & 7

Films: 5 Best Film of the Day(s): Users

All Light, Everywhere: In 2015, during the riots and rebellion in the immediate aftermath of the Freddy Gray killing by local police, the Baltimore Police department agreed with a private entrepreneur to send up a secret surveillance plane over the city, in order to monitor, in clear HD images, those neighborhoods most primed for a violent reaction. They did this without informing the mayor’s office, or other local government agencies. This is only a facet of Theo Anthony’s far-reaching doc on the subject, not just of surveillance, but also the Act of Looking as any type of objective measure of reality. Anthony stays fixated on Baltimore, his hometown, when he tours the AXON corporate headquarters in Arizona, the makers of the most used police body cams and taser weapons, where the company CEO enthusiastically walks through the offices and production warehouse, as these items are being manufactured. Not surprisingly, despite their near-ubiquity amongst American police stations, AXON’s most lucrative asset is its intense data collection, via its evidence.com portal, where law enforcement uploads thousands of hours of video each day. Anthony also spends time with marketing focus groups, camera-toting carrier pigeons, and scientists exploring the framework of our visual understanding. It’s at times an abstract experience  —  the film communicates its intentions largely through bracketed text blocks, and a voice-actor, who acknowledges their role in your understanding the film’s premise. He also makes frequent use of past scientific thought on the subject, including the creation of the earliest forms of motion picture recording, to best exemplify the more we attempt to create visual “truth,” the more the standard slips through our fingers. Notably, the AXON recording equipment is designed to give the idea of full-disclosure with respect to the police’ behavior, as a means of protecting the community, but it’s clear that the appeal to law-enforcement is actually quite the opposite: Providing enough legally permissible evidence to either exonerate their officers, or to put the plaintiff behind bars. As Anthony’s pithy film points out, the act of seeing is still an act.

The World to Come: It is, of course, deeply unfair to compare each film to the highwater mark in a given genre  —  to say, for example, ‘Well, I quite liked that hard-boiled egg, but it’s no souffle au fromage’  —  but the current spate of turn-of-the-century hardship lesbian romance films makes it near impossible not to put them in canonical order. Leading the way, it must be said, is the first of this current iterations of romances, Céline Sicamma’s excellent Portrait of a Lady on Fire, which took my breath away. If the low-water mark of this triad is last year’s Ammonite, which relied far too much on its esteemed leads to do all the heavy lifting; Mona Fastvold’s film nestles somewhere close to the latter, but nowhere near the rarefied air of the former. What Fastvold does make use of is the natural environment in which the film was shot (Bucharest, as a believable stand-in for Upstate New York), filled with snow, and mud, and the damp gray features of that clump of woods in the valley of the mountains nearby. The story gives us two farming couples, both miserable, albeit in slightly different ways. Abigail (Katherine Waterston) and Dyer (Casey Affleck) genuinely care about one another, but the loss of their young daughter to diphtheria has turned their marriage into a sort of continual wake; and Tallie (Vanessa Kirby) and her dour husband, Finney (Christopher Abbott), who don’t have any children, and with Finney’s grimly cruel nature, aren’t likely to have any. In their shared loneliness and misery, Abigail and Tallie become friends, then eventually lovers, finding in each other’s arms, the wonder of worlds and joys otherwise lost to them. The film certainly means well, but as told mainly in journal entry and letter VO  —  Waterston’s voice so muted and unwavering, she sounds like an NPR journalist reporting a story  —  it's so modulated and chaste, the emotional arc never rises beyond the slightly bowed. We aren’t given enough privvy into Tallie’s own state of mind, so thoroughly are we inside the consciousness of Abigail, to feel the full weight of her decisions. It’s earnest, but not particularly moving.

Flee: You don’t see a ton of animated documentaries, but in the case of Jonas Poher Rasmussen’s harrowing immigrant’s survivor tale, there was no way to catalogue the early life of Amin, the film’s subject, without extensive recreations in the first place. As a result, there is a strikingly evocative visual element to the manner Rasmussen and his animation team document Amin’s journey from war-torn Afghanistan, to Moscow, to Estonia, back to Moscow, and finally to Copenhagen. After his father is taken into custody by the Mujahideen in the late ‘80s, Amin and his mother, brother, and sisters fly out to Russia, in the months just after the fall of communism. From one chaotic country to another, the family desperately try to leave Russia for western Europe, but with unreliable traffickers, and a lone older sibling in Sweden, having to scrounge every penny he makes in order to make arrangements, things move in an agonizingly halting way. Eventually, Amin gets safely to Copenhagen, but is allowed to stay only by having to lie to Swedish authorities that the rest of his family is dead. If that weren’t enough, adding to Amin’s fears, he feels the need to tell his family  —  now scattered about Europe  —  about his being gay. Through extended interviews with Amin, Rasmussen teases out his friend’s full story, spread out over multiple flashbacks, while interlocking with Amin’s current serious relationship in Copenhagen, with a man he plans to marry, if only he can finally accept and trust in the idea of having a permanent home. Rasmussen’s genuine friendship with Amin adds a warm sheen of empathy to the proceedings, even in the ways not everything makes perfect sense. You get the understanding that Amin, having long buried his extremely difficult past journeys, is hesitating, even now, to fully unburden himself all at once, as if he has to take the time to reconcile all the different versions of his own story he’s had to live with, in order to make sense of it all.

Hive: In the era of #metoo, and Sundance’s continued efforts to represent female-helmed films at the festival, it’s becoming ever more clear in film after film, the biggest impediment to systemic change in culture and government is the ever-so-delicate male ego, which protects itself from damage more often than not by absolutely brutalizing anything that would dare threaten it. In Blerta Basholli’s excellent debut feature, based on a true story, the year is 1999, and in the aftermath of the grisly Serbian War, many communities are still awaiting word on the many missing, presumed dead family members who were taken away and will very likely not be coming back. One such half-widow is a fierce woman named Fahirje (Yllka Gashi), who still takes care of her missing husband’s father (Cun Lajci), as well as her two children. With funds dwindling, and her honey business not faring as well without her husband, a seasoned beekeeper, Fahirje gets a drivers’ license and begins a new business, hand-crafting jars of ajvar, the Serbian roasted red pepper sauce, and selling them at the local grocery. Despite violent, brutish opposition from many of the men in her small village of Krusha, whose favorite put-down is to call her a “whore,” Fahirje soldiers on, eventually enlisting many of the other village widows to join her business. Through it all, she has to contend with her own emotional pain  —  her husband vanished years ago, but has yet to be identified amongst the remains of the mass graves that become the final resting place for many Serbians. Basholli shoots the film primarily as handheld verite, documenting the day-to-day building of the business as well as the emotional upheaval of her protagonist. In this, Gashi, with her smoldering eyes, the lines of determination etched into her face, is a revelation. Fahrije suffers the multitude of slings and arrows  —  most miserably coming from her own teen daughter, who is embarrassed at first at the attention and gossip her mother is getting   —  with dignified solemnity. By the end, she has empowered a generation of women, while paving the way for countless others. Not all revolutions are won on the battlefield.

Users: It’s indeed jarring to see a film so dedicated to visual sumptuousness, so satisfyingly transfixing in its use of pattern, motion, and juxtaposition, but all in service towards an epitaph to our inevitable extinction. Natalia Almada’s cinematic essay uses its visual poetics to lure us in, to bewitch us with its beauty as it gently eases the blade of the knife deep in our midsection. A mother of two young children, Almada begins the film contemplating her babies, and the world in which they have been brought into, voracious in its use of natural materials, polluting the oceans with miles of fiber-optic cable, burning our forests to the ground, exploiting the Earth for every gram of mineable material, every ounce of oil, all to fill the growing chasm between ourselves and the formerly natural world in which we used to inhabit. The film moves at a placid, even-keeled pace. There are many beautifully composed slow-fixed shots of fields, trees, cityscapes from high above; juxtaposed against contrasting conceptions: an overhead drone shot of the Pacific’s cresting coastline cutting to an AT&T manhole cover; her own child’s face lit by the glow of a computer as he fixates on the screen in front of him, to a distant plane’s long vapor trail through a swath of sky; an infant breast-feeding to the endless rows of sprouts in a hydroponic lab. There is so much stuff, so many things, from shipping crates to solar panels, all slipping past the lens of DP Bennett Cerf’s cameras, so as to become something akin to a sort of visual intervention: You can see it, the film is telling us, you know very well how this is going to end. Almada doesn’t provide answers, or even firm conclusions, exactly. These are the things she is wrestling with in her own conscience, the horrific implications of otherwise deeply pleasing symmetric images. The film is a stunning ode to our demise.

Sundance goes mostly virtual for this year’s edition, sparing filmgoers the altitude, long waits, standing lines, and panicked eating binges  —  but also, these things and more that make the festival so damn endearing. In any event, Sundance via living room is still a hell of a lot better than no Sundance. A daily report.

[thevividgreenmoss]

Like much folk horror, The Wicker Man first appears to be a rural exploitation story in which an urbanite stumbles across a backwater burg where society’s standardized pieties aren’t observed. But it twists into a story about how useful a naive scapegoat—the “fool,” as Howie is positioned by Summerisle—can be in keeping the pitchforks pointed down at the land and never up at the landowner. Whether Lee’s character buys into his folksy, back-to-the-land heresy is irrelevant. For all his rituals and ceremonies, he remains gentry. This is what governs his actions, and what seals Howie’s fiery fate.

In Ari Aster’s Midsommar (2019), a group of curious American millennials decamp to a remote Swedish hamlet for a highly Instagrammable solstice festival (think Maypoles, peasant dresses, flower crowns, and all the other summery, Coachella-chic accoutrements). In Wicker Man fashion, their arrival is more auspicious than it initially appears, as they end up embroiled in a conspiratorial pagan plot, unfolding against the ceaseless daylight of the Scandinavian mid-summer. Even before Midsommar, the ideas and imagery of The Wicker Man have sprouted up across the landscape of contemporary horror cinema, tapping into fears about manipulation, xenophobia, urban-rural divides, crowds gone mad, post-truth epistemology, and a lurking sense that personal agency is illusory, with the actions of the individual governed by forces that are (or are presented as being) beyond our ken.

In Folk Horror: Hours Dreadful and Things Strange, Adam Scovell identifies isolation, landscape, skewed morality, and a happening/summoning (often in the form of ritual sacrifice) as the four links in the “folk horror chain.” In Robert Eggers’s The Witch (2015), a family of seventeenth century Puritans banished from their New England village must carve out their place in a hostile, unforgiving landscape. Crops fail, family members disappear, livestock is unsettled, and adolescent girls fall prey to the hysterical throes of puberty. In Eggers’s film, it’s as if nature—that immortal “devil’s playground”—is avenging itself on the colonizers who came to tame it.

...In contrast to horror films that teach us to fear Satanists simply because they are Satanists (Rosemary’s Baby, The Mephisto Waltz, House of the Devil), The Wicker Man and its progeny force us to reckon with the deeper implications of the hooting-and-hollering heretic cabal. Folk horror may be best distinguished not by its mere depiction of Satanists, pagans, witches, buxom nudes wreathed in summer garlands, but by the manner in which they pose threats to our fundamental beliefs. Unlike most horror, in which an interloping monster is either destroyed (in order to purge a threat to an established order) or otherwise incorporated into that order, folk horror operates by implicating the viewer in the dissolution and destruction of that order.

...The first wave of folk horror crested during the waning of a vital counter-culture that had wholesale rejected long-held beliefs about social order, gender, sexuality, and imperialism. If 1968, the year Witchfinder General was released, marks the beginning of the folk horror cycle, it also marks the moment where utopian visions of social revolution were abandoning a politics of collective liberation and ceding to New Age philosophies of personal transformation. The genre’s development maps onto the what Scovell describes as “a backdrop of confident optimism disintegrating impossibly quickly into a nihilistic pessimism.” The films crack open the space between the promise of Paris 1968 and the repression of Kent State 1970, between the dream of Woodstock and the nightmare of Altamont, between The Beatles and Black Sabbath.

Folk horror’s original social context saw the energy animating the 1960s collectivist repudiation of traditional values fizzle and fade into the following decade’s interest in esotericism, astrology, and the occult. Some hippies who suspected that the existing social order could not be willed away with songs about peace and love reasoned that they could at least build their own Buckminster Fuller-style domes and settled into agricultural communes to experiment with pantheistic spiritualties.

...While The Wicker Man’s viewers are not exactly invited to cheer as Howie burns, the merry music and free love of the Summerislanders does seem more fun than the dour abstention of the film’s ostensible protagonist. Teenage daughter Tomasin’s entry into the forest at the end of The Witch is also treated with similar ambiguity. The witches’ coven is both a source of fear for the viewer and freedom for the character, who after accepting the enticing offer of a talking goat—“Wouldst thou like to live deliciously?”—gets to literally fly away from her overbearing, repressive family.

The overlapping intention here is not mere proselytizing, or preaching the ethical superiority of some alternative, some hippy-dippy, left-liberal, or openly Satanic worldview. Indeed, some read the end of The Wicker Man as a defense of Howie’s beliefs (a reading encouraged by the rictus grinning Summerislanders who gaze upon his burning body, joined together to sing some sinister folk shanty). But finding horror in the space between opposing belief systems, rather than in the content of belief systems themselves, allows these films to appeal both to the permaculture-curious anarchist sporting a “Cops for Crops” back patch and the Christian viewer scared of the Beltane-observing freaks who hate their un-freedom.

A 1998 reappraisal of The Wicker Man in a Scottish broadsheet identified the shifting appeal of a film that, since its release, was regarded as little more than a relatively obscure Brit-film cult classic:

Now, as demonstrated by the enthusiastic remarks of a group of New Age twenty-somethings with Celtic tattoos (that’s Celtic with a hard C, folks) and faces full of ironmongery, The Wicker Man has become keenly appreciated not only by mainstream film buffs and horror hounds but by people who find it a vindication of their own mystical beliefs. It is as though a movie of The Diary of Anne Frank were to become a hit with Nazis, who’d come along to cheer the feel-good ending when the storm troopers haul the Frank family out of the attic.

It’s a sarcastic quip that probably seemed absurd at the time, invoking a comparison so far outside the sphere of consensus that it’s easy to brush off as a harmless joke. But it seems, like so many historical absurdities, considerably less funny now, as white supremacist attacks on synagogues and racially motivated murders regularly dominate the fickle news cycle. The surge of blood-and-soil, volkish fascism in North America makes the counter-cultural embrace of folk horror antagonists seem more deeply uncomfortable, especially when groups like the Soldiers of Odin and the Wolves of Vinland incorporate runic symbols and pagan iconography that seems culled from some hard-bound Compendium of Folk Horror.

In Gods of the Blood: The Pagan Revival and White Separatism, Mattias Gardell argues that during the 1990s, Ariosophic occultism and Norse heathen religions like Asatru overtook Christian Identity as the spiritual dimension of the white supremacist movement. This might seem like a crude projection of the fears of the present onto the films of the past, demanding a revision of that old Mark Twain quote: “To a man with a Hammer film, every nail driven into the palms of a scapegoat looks like brigades of /pol/ cybernazis unleashing Pepes of pestilence to trigger the libs.” But the association between the appeals of paganism and fascism was not lost on The Wicker Man helmer Robin Hardy, who in a 1979 interview was quoted as saying: “It was no accident that Hitler brought back all those pagan feasts at the Nuremberg rallies. The ovens would be lit later.”

Such evaluations may be reasonably deemed a little suspect; like a variation of the internet-favorite Reductio ad Hitlerum fallacy, in which the themes of Hardy’s film gain consequence in their evocation of the world-historic cataclysm of the Holocaust. But they gain a renewed (and again, sinisterly absurd) significance in the present moment, where symbols of paganism and white nationalism are being revived not only in conspicuous tandem, but confused confluence. In place of a more conspicuous swastika, a more obscure runic symbol—a Celtic cross, Thor’s hammer, the German Wolfsangel—will suffice. Once again, the symbols and regalia of the past (be it the imagined distant past of pre-Christian heathenry or the more recent past of the Third Reich) are being revived. We live in an age where, ludicrous as it may seem, certain viewers may well cheer the Nazis hauling Anne Frank out of her annex.

...At its core, folk horror is speculative fiction about the failures of the Age of Enlightenment. In Tentacles Longer than the Night, Eugene Thacker explains how the universal maxims of Enlightenment thinkers are conditional. Kant’s categorical imperative requires one to act “as if” the values dictating their actions are universally valid. In supernatural horror, the conditions of this logic are violated by the appearance of some entity that threatens the anthropocentric view of the world, evoking terror from the knowledge that Enlightenment rationality is bumping up against its limit.

Folk horror, by contrast, inverts rather than negates Enlightenment philosophy: the mob sacrifices the individual, peasant superstitions supplant science and reason as the true source of knowledge, a holistic and animistic conception of the universe overtakes an atomistic and mechanistic one. The genre presents a return of these things that had to be repressed in the transition towards a rational, individualistic, and ultimately capitalist social order: witchcraft, female empowerment, sexuality, and an organismic, earth-based conception of the universe.

Here the idea is not so much that logic and reason have reached some natural limit, but rather that the promises of the Enlightenment are always provisional, subject to revocation following one too many bad harvests. Again, the ideological structure may seem warped and inverted, but it possesses an internal, contingent consistency. The death of Sergeant Howie turns the standard horror trope of sexuality and impropriety leading to death on its ear. Unlike the many slain corpses stacked elsewhere in the horror genre, Howie’s sin is precisely his dopey virginity and piousness.

For all its dabbling with the supernatural, the folk horror genre is ultimately one rooted in materialism. The landscape holds considerable power over its people, but not in a mystical way. Allan Brown argues that The Wicker Man specifically can be read as a sci-fi story about technological failure—without the barren fruit trees caused by the poor performance of Lord Summerisle’s experimental botany, no sacrifice would be needed. If the Enlightenment philosophy that provides the grounds for contemporary liberalism involves a faith in humanity’s ability to transcend material conditions, to behave as if laws were universal and human ingenuity had no natural limits, then The Wicker Man brings us back down to earth, and we are reminded of the material conditions that make modern society possible.

Chained up in the wooden structure, Howie attempts to reason with the Lord:

Your crops failed because your strains failed. Fruit is not meant to be grown on these islands. It’s against nature. Don’t you see that killing me is not going to bring back your apples? . . . Don’t you understand that if your crops fail this year, next year you’re going to have to have another blood sacrifice? And next year, no one less than the king of Summerisle himself will do.

In this moment, Adam Scovell argues, the film is “laying down the law/lore of folk horror; that fear supplanted into communities comes back to haunt those who sowed its first seeds.” Burning to death, Howie calls out to his Christian god; the villagers sing and dance as they offer him up to their pagan lords. The viewer may feel that Howie is right, the apples won’t come next year, but the horror comes from the realization that Summerisle is also right: the sacrifice will be accepted.

Like the detestable vogue in white nationalist movements, which cop their iconography and philosophy from the rubbish heap of some imagined pre-Christian, Aryanist past, the renewal of folk horror (particularly in the American context) speaks to an unsettling truth, festering in contemporary political and cultural life. The return to symbology of Neo-Paganism, or the back-to-the-land return to the supposed “realness” inherent in far-off solstice festivals (an attraction of authenticity alluring the lambs of Midsommar), suggests not so much an antidote to the cult of Enlightenment rationality as its uncanny complement. Think only of Julius Caesar himself, whose grisly imagery of human bodies crammed into a flaming wicker statue was utterly self-serving: casting Gauls and Celts as paranoid pagans in order to justify their slaughter and conquest at the tips of legionnaires’ spearheads.

The horror latent in folk horror, then as now, is not an abject fear of pagans or free-loving hippies or straight-up Satanists. It’s the unsettling knowledge that the people are often all too willing to trade one form of power and subjugation for an aesthetically different manifestation of those same conditions, if only to restore faith in power itself. Even if the crops continue to fail, and the heathens of Summerisle never again taste a locally sourced organic apple, it doesn’t matter: the sacrifice succeeds. Killing Howie need not bring back the damn apples themselves, so long as it restores faith in ritual, mysticism, heathen magick, and the other counter-Enlightenment energies that Lee’s Summerisle, in all his sinisterness and sartorial preposterousness, wields in a perverse seasonal pageant, all undertaken to consolidate his own power: as gentry and patriarch, one Lord substituted for another.

[scary-movies-on-netflix]

SEA FEVER (2019)

A young doctoral candidate goes on a fishing boat as part of her studies.  At first, everyone is flabbergasted because she has red hair!  Shit!  We have some “The Perfect Storm” (2000) vibes, because the captain and his wife are desperate to catch some fish, and he takes them through illegal waters.  Everyone sees some whales, and then something big catches them and holds the boat in place.  (”We’re gonna need a bigger boat!”  Heh.)  Our student goes diving to take a look, and she sees long glowing tentacles attached to a large body down below. 

The boat gets moving again, but now people are infected with larva from the sea creature!  Shit!  I mean, it left goo everywhere, filled with larva, and people with cuts are being infected. One guy’s eyes burst open, and another guy just expires in bed.  The student insists that they have to quarantine themselves (SOCIAL DISTANCING), but everyone else just wants to go home.  (”LIBERATE BOAT”)  

The student’s not wrong, of course.  She’s probably seen “The Thing” (1982), so she knows that no one can reach land, lest they unleash a terrible creature.  She disables the ship, and everyone finally accepts what’s happening to them.  Some more people die, and one larva they captured earlier in the water tank busts out through the bottom and the boat starts to sink.  The student and the engineer light the boat on fire (as a signal) and climb into a raft, but the creature grabs the guy with its tentacles!  The student dives down to save him, but she cuts herself in the process.  She stares into the water, and then she plunges below to get a good, final, look at the creature.  The final guy sits in the raft, lit up by the bioluminescent algae floating over the ocean, and waits for an approaching rescue boat.  Cue the soulful music and THE END.

This is a Swedish-Irish-Wallonian (that’s in Belgium) production, and it’s an adequate entry into the “sea monster” genre.  Both the acting and production are solid, if the plot is just a little bit predictable.  We have the typical tropes-queasy body horror, squishy creature, ocean born paranoia (the “sea fever”)-but that’s not what this movie is about.  Instead, we have an introverted student, who hates being with people, but she learns to get along with her crewmates before discovering how to assert herself in a terrible situation.  That’s what I’ll remember.

Currently available for streaming all over the place.

[othernecessarythings]

i’m sick and bored, let’s go

2020-02-10 (i’m 16)

1: How tall or short do you wish you were?

i’m really content with being 167 cm

2: What’s your dream pet? (Real or not)

a dog, preferably a german shepherd

3: Do you have a favorite clothing style?

um i switch between alternative/emo-ish and hipster ig fashion girl, i like both of them

4: What was your favorite video game growing up?

mario kart at nintendo ds

5: What three things/people do you think of most each day:

my best friend, music (hayley williams) and my sister

6: If you had a warning label, what would yours say?

way too indecisive for their own good or may not be brave enough to voice their own opinion

7: What is your opinion on [insert person/thing here]?

winter, way too overrated it’s unbelievably boring and depressing

8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic]

?? idk

9: Are you ticklish?

ye

10: Are you allergic to anything?

oh boy am i allergic,, in short yes i fucking am, to soap and shampoo and perfume and makeup and nickel and grass pollen and dog saliva and laundry detergent and the list just continues

11: What’s your sexuality?

umm idk bi maybe

12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa?

neither, i’m not much of a hot drink person, but cocoa

13: Are you a cat or dog person?

DOG (idontreallytrustcats)

14: Would you rather be a vampire, elf, or merperson?

mermaid!! oh to be a free woman with shiny scales

15: Do you have a favorite Youtuber?

exurb1a or apri park, and um guilty pleasure of mine but daniel howell

16: How tall are you?

167 cm, and with some googling, ≈5.5 feet

17: If you had to change your name, what would you change it to?

ah my middle name i think

18: How much do you weigh? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]

i actually don’t know, we don’t own a scale,, but like somewhere between 50-60 kg

19: Do you believe in ghosts/spirits?

umm no

20: Do you like space or the ocean more?

i love love love the ocean!!

21: Are you religious?

yeah i kinda am and all my friends around me are atheists (very few in sweden are devoted religious people) but i am maybe? like i don’t believe in any god, but i believe in the good every religion speaks about, and i appreciate the christian concept of love and acceptance,, idk

22: Pet peeves?

ah many, i never do something about them though, but for example some swedish grammatical errors (de/dem sigh)

23: Would you rather be nocturnal or diurnal [opposite of nocturnal]?

nocturnal

24: Favorite constellation?

cassiopeia

25: Favorite star?

?? i don’t know any stars

26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls?

i don’t like any dolls

27: Any phobias or fears?

not really

28: Do you think global warming is real?

of course?? how could you not?? i mean come on i’m swedish we knew it was real before greta represented our country’s fight against it

29: Do you believe in reincarnation?

um no but i don’t believe that nothing happens after you die either so maybe

30: Favorite movie?

right now little women

31: Do you get scared easily?

yeah i never watch horror movies or stuff like that, but unlike from my friends am i not afraid of walking alone at night or similar things

32: How many pets have you own in your lifetime?

a few fishes and a dog

33: Blog rate? [You’ll rate the blog of the one who’s asking.]

i’ll rate my own blog instead, it’s shitty but it helps me relax and enjoy myself, it’s a safe space for only me

34: What is a color that calms you?

blue

35: Where would you like to travel and/or live?

oh so many places, i’d like to travel to asia and later live in the center of europe maybe

36: Where were you born?

sweden

37: What is your eye color?

dark brown

38: Introvert or extrovert?

definitely introvert

39: Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs?

no but i find it quite entertaining to read them and see if any applies to me or my friends

40: Hugs or kisses?

good hugs

41: Who is someone you would like to see/visit right now?

like hayley williams would be great

42: Who is someone you love deeply?

my sister and my best friends

43: Any piercings you want?

more in my ears

44: Do you like tattoos and piercings?

depends, i’ve got a few myself and i love them

45: Do you smoke or have you eiver done so?

yeah i do, both this and that lol

46: Talk about your crush, if you have one!

not really, i’m not the crush type of people,, it’s really hard for me to find someone i like

47: What is a sound you really hate?

i’ve never had a problem with specific sounds, but some feelings like the one when your hands are slightly damp and you lightly rub them against each other?? uhhhrhs i can’t stand it,, wait i know one sound!! i can’t sleep when it’s raining outside! and that’s quite unusual i guess, but it really isn’t calming for me

48: A sound you really love?

laughter from people i love, the waves by the sea, a candle being lit, the sparkle from an open fire

49: Can you do a backflip?

no

50: Can you do the splits?

no

51: Favorite actor and/or actress?

i’m not that much of a movie fan, i don’t really know any

52: Favorite movie?

right now little women

53: How are you feeling right now?

sick and tired, but overall pretty happy!! i went to a wonderful concert yesterday and spent a few days in another city with my best friends

54: What color would you like your hair to be right now?

oh so many but right now black and dark red

55: When did you feel happiest?

last year at a tøp concert i think

56: Something that calms you down?

puzzles and music

57: Have any mental disorders? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]

nothing diagnosed and nothing right now, but i’m pretty sure i was depressed and had anxiety for some time ago

58: What does your URL mean?

um i just had to come up with a name quick and this was what i felt at the moment, and i guess it fits me, i am in fact a stupid goddamn fan of many things,, neon places are a combo of tøp related stuff and the song perfect places by lorde, and blasphemypilots is the song blasphemy by just twenty one pilots (see i am a stupid goddamn fan huh sigh)

59: What three words describe you the most?

oh um probably intelligent, indecisive and realistic

60: Do you believe in evolution?

what??? of course i do?? how could u not,, like seriously though i’ve never met any who don’t believe in it? what would u otherwise believe in? gods creation of the world or something? nah, as i said before, no one in sweden are really religious

61: What makes you unfollow a blog?

usually them posting about stuff i’m not in to, but ofcourse if they’re being homophobic/racist/sexist etc

62: What makes you follow a blog?

content i like, majorly just text posts about relatable stuff

63: Favorite kind of person:

intelligent, witty people with wide smiles and lots of adventurous spirit and spontaneous ideas

64: Favorite animal(s):

idk maybe dogs

65: Name three of your favorite blogs.

i really don’t know any specific

66: Favorite emoticon:

:) ;) not that original ik

67: Favorite meme:

hmm idk

68: What is your MBTI personality type?

oh i’ve done it plenty of times and got different results each time, but in the most recent was i infj-t

69: What is your star sign?

pisces

70: Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog?

if i had, i’d probably teach them to be able to do it

71: What outfit out of all your clothes do you like to wear the most?

black, wide jeans with a large grey reebok sweatshirt is probably my comfiest, but i’ve got other fits i feel more good looking in like my beige, wide jeans with a white turtleneck, a bright green sweater and jewelry

72: Post a selfie or two?

no thanks

73: Do you have platform shoes?

no, and i don’t think i want either

74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself?

i can’t for my life imitate other people or dialects or stuff like that

75: Can you do a front flip?

hah no

76: Do you like birds?

yeah sure

77: Do you like to swim?

love it!! swimming in the ocean is wonderful, and in pools are okay i guess

78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you?

depends on mood, i like both, it’s kinda dependable on season lol

79: Something you wish didn’t exist:

some music genres lol like swedish rap or trump

80: Some thing you wish did exist:

i’m not that creative but more concerts in my hometown would be lovely, and for stuff that doesn’t exist? maybe hot ice cream or a speaker that played silence so the room got quiet hmm

continuing in the next post