#generosity; hope; dewdrops ;;

[alwaysjustmina]

Whispers of Rain

Chapter 8: For So Long I Have Waited

Thank you @kamonart for this beautiful artwork!

Also thank you to @papaslittlesunshine for beta reading and @midnight-moth for listening to all my feelings on this story!

Eidolon didn’t know what to do, Dew hadn’t said anything since he had returned from his lunch with Ifrit. He looked hollow, the little spark he still had in his eyes had gone out completely. All he could do was hold Dew, hoping he wasn’t overstepping again.

Their days turned back into a monotonous routine, get up, shower, eat, sleep, repeat. Ifrit didn’t stop by, but he made sure the servants checked on them and relayed messages often. It was through the servants that he found out what had happened at lunch. Or at least the part about Beltane. Dew would just look through the servants as they carried on about plans that were taking place. They didn’t need to ask questions, it wasn’t like Dew would be allowed to make any decisions.

Eidolon found out at these “meetings” he would be attending the festival as well, he could enjoy some freedom there as both Dew and Ifrit would be busy “entertaining” others. He couldn’t leave the grounds, there was a fence covering the grounds that barred that. As it was his first time off a leash, he was to behave or he would not have further demonstrations of Ifrit’s generosity. Got it, follow the rules, or be punished. He tried not to roll his eyes, did they think he was stupid? His responsibility was to get Dewdrop ready for the big day, make sure he looked presentable and was ready to go.

Eidolon figured this is what had upset Dew, how couldn’t it? Once he and Ifrit were mated, the only separation of that bond was true death. He would not be able to be with Rain again. Eidolon had never seen the bond forced on someone before, he didn't know how that would work, but he had seen people who weren’t in love to the depth they were after the ceremony, did it take away free will? He grieved for what this would do to Dewdrop.

He had calculated it had been a few weeks since they had left the room, from what he understood Beltane was the following week, not much longer now. He awoke before dawn one morning, to Dewdrop staring at him from across the bed. His eyes looked partially clear for the first time in weeks.

“Hi,” Eidolon whispered in hopes of not scaring Dew now that he looked he may be ready to talk.

Dewdrop’s eyes closed, his face scrunching up, as if he was fighting an inner battle to emerge from within his cocoon of depression. Eidolon was thrilled when he opened his eyes back up to look back at him.

“I’m sorry,” He could barely hear Dew.

“You have nothing-”

“Don’t, Don’t play it off like it was nothing, and I left you here, having to deal with what happened between us by yourself. I am sorry, I should have stayed and talked to you, even if it was just a few moments. To make sure you were ok.” Dew closed his eyes as he talked, the pain of the last few days playing across his features, the pain of what he left Eidolon to deal with.

“Dew, it-”

“I am serious Eidolon, I know I hurt you, I am sorry.”

He brought his eyes back up to meet Eidolon's eyes, both trying to not lay more hurt on the other. They stared at each other for a while, both trying to read the other's expression, unable to tell what the other felt.

Dew dragged his hands through his hair, untangling the knots as he went, looking away from Eidolon as he did it. He wasn’t sure why he felt calm, he should be breaking apart still, after what Ifrit told him. Maybe he was just numb. Maybe him and Rain were only meant to burn fast and bright? He hoped Rain hadn’t suffered, that he didn’t know Dew wasn’t there with him in the end. That he couldn’t see him now. He just had to make this right with Eidolon, make sure he was ok.

“Dew,” Eidolon started quietly, “I should have stopped, I thought you knew it was me, I-I should have realized, should have known, should have-known better.”

“Eidolon.” He didn’t know what to say. He liked him, he did but he was in no place to offer anyone anything. Least of all someone he cared about, who had cared for him like he had.

Eidolon’s heart broke when his name was uttered from Dew’s mouth. He wanted him so badly, he wished Dew felt the same way he did, but he didn’t, he knew he didn’t. He would offer his friendship, even if that is all he would get in return.

“It’s ok, really, Dewdrop, I care about you, I am sorry I didn’t stop it sooner.”

Dew looked at him questioningly, but he nodded his assent. If that is what Eidolon wanted to say for the moment, he could accept it.

“Do you want to talk about what Ifrit said at lunch?”

“Not really-I assume you heard about the festival though?”

Eidolon nodded, he didn’t want to hurt him by asking questions he wasn’t ready to answer.

“I will be there with you, every step of the way, if you want?”

Dew reached out his hand and took Eidolon’s in his, squeezing his thanks, while nodding his head.

They stayed like this for a while, both in and out of subconscious as the day went on. Dew finally fell back asleep.

His dreams were plagued with Rain, as always. The one he found him in today, was comforting at least. It was the second time they had a hotel room together. Both were exhausted from the earlier ritual, they barely carried themselves through the hotel room door. They had both looked at the one bed, then back at each other, laughing.

“Want to share?” Raising his eyes, in shock Rain laughed at Dew’s question.

“Share, what would the others think?”

Even through their haze of tiredness, Dew reached out to Rain, grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the bathroom.

“You can share with me on one condition.” He shut the door behind them, turning from Rain and reaching into the shower, turning the water to warm before turning back around.

Read the rest on Ao3

[thecpdiary]

A Farida Haque Poem

"I am chained to the wind.

I am bound to a tree and I hear sap buzzing

up and down, up and down.

It warms me, especially when it snows.

Who was it, I wonder who fettered my ankles?

How foolish, I thought, to never ask.

But when you’re happy, foolishness can be forgiven.

I am chained to a rock.

While songbirds spin a web of bright strains around me, reeds whistle and cataracts of butterflies go about their fragile business.

Laughter of children carries me about and my rock becomes a cloud.

It is love that chains me to a rock.

I said to it, keep me grounded.

And the rock loved me back.

Some days, I am not happy.

The wind sweeps me over calderas of war.

How can it expect me to disown blackened babies far below whose mothers lie still,

eyes turned to opals?

Weep I must, chained to humanity.

How can I disown distant sorrow and silences of death?

They grow into me they become me I exhale them as prayers I become nothing —

it is as it should be.

I am chained to humanity.

The wind smiles.

Generosity of time and hope —

a hoary alchemist whose hands dance to music we can never hear and make balms, which rest a while

on weary warriors then gently turn into vapors and are gone —

their work is done.

Who resets my hourglass when the last grain of sand sinks into oblivion?

I never think to ask,

for I know what comes in last can be the first to be reborn.

I begin to honor every life lost celebrate those yet to be

and that is how I reclaim a transformed heart.

The tree and I, we celebrate for it is a triumph of sorts to forget.

It is autumn and green-gold leaves drop like blessings.

It is time for sap to rest.

Too often we exhaust ourselves for what, I ask the tree.

Its answer is a weary sadness.

The vagabond wind ah, such capriciousness —

tugs me along.

I taste sweet waters of icecaps.

Air is shards of blue icicles which my breath turns liquid and it drips from my thirsty fingers.

The wind’s labors are written in stone.

Brother rock, sister wind.

It often drags me through fields upon fields of red and purple wildflowers

then gardens full of barbs and I say to myself, you are invincible!

You are invincible, Calderas of war forgotten.

When you’re happy, better to not question terrains…

Most days, fragrant light of colors walks with me.

And today,

I saw one sleepy folded flower.

I knew a whole galaxy swirled inside it.

How foolish, I thought to want to own it.

I waited for sunrise.

Imagine if you can, dewdrops in a panicked dance slowly become phantoms…

And together, the sun and I, we set the galaxy free."

Farida Haque

[makotokyoqoku-archived]

someone: guy gardner is an asshole, he is-- 

me, an intellectual: guy gardner pulled himself through multiple traumas through a sheer force of willpower, he had suffered so much during his life; he was emotionally and physically abused by his father, he was comatose twice, he battled depression through most of his life, he broke both of his legs saving a child and he genuinely believed that the reason why the child was in danger was because of him. he majored in psychology and education, he married someone and then divorced her because he knew that the relationship was not going to work due to his depression, he toured the world to help himself through it. he loves with everything he has in his body and he would literally die for everyone he loves, he loves the green lantern corps with all of his being because they are the only family he has ever known, the only ones who truly cared for him. guy knows when he is wrong and apologizes, he never knows when to steps down from a fight with anyone because he genuinely believes that there is a way for everything, there has to be. he doesnt take shit from anyone because he is tired of doing that, he has anger management issues due to his traumas and the injustice he sees in the world. he knows when to step down, he knows when something is not working, despite everything, thats why he quit as a counselor for prison inmates, because he knew his anger would not help anyone. he wants to help people, he wants to help children grow up to be good. guy gardner might be an asshole but he has a heart made of diamond and gold, indestructible and precious.

[wistful-giselle]

Hello Giselle! I don't know if you have seen my two other asks, but I wan't try my luck three times. I hope you would answer this because I have no one to talk to. My days are very dull and dark, I am an aspiring writer/poet, people like us are made to love and be passionate...but these past few weeks I could not write my heart out. I am very heart broken, and the thought of being lonely kills me. I have been depressed, but what's more painful than sadness is the fact that you can't feel anymore and that is what I'm going through. Hope you advices to ease my pain and longing. As I mention that I am an aspiring writer, can you recommend me some steps and what to do to a procrastinating and chaotic mind like mine? My vocabulary is also not that good as English is not my first language, I hope that you can suggest me many words that reflect beauty and ethereal. And also poetry and books that can help my way out of this. My heart goes on to you, my sweet fairy💓💗 I really hope that you get to see this... :)

oh my love, I genuinely feel so heartbroken after reading this... I might cry... I am so sorry that I have not replied sooner; I very very rarely check my inbox and often asks get lost in the aether. I am deeply glad that you persisted though, I want to help as best I can. you write beautifully by the way- even with english not being your first language you are able to express yourself in a way that holds a lot of emotion and intensity. ♡

I understand loneliness; I understand being unfeeling. although, strangely, I feel that when I am so dissociated from the world, I write best. I simply write what I feel- I don’t try and make it ‘good’, or beautiful, just a reflection of what is happening within my mind or soul. even when one can’t feel anything, there is still something to encapsulate- a hollowness, an absence, a white, blank space or a dark, winding forest that can objectified and made less engulfing for being put into words.

as for some words that I feel are some of the most beautiful in the english language, they include for me:

♡ pearlescent, ephemeral, drowsy, moonbeam, languid, selkie, ethereal, mellifluous, enthralled, lull, ambrosia, translucent, lilting, twilight, enchanting, murmurous, dream, eglantine, wistful, aurora, reminiscent, dewdrop, seraphic, liminal, melancholy, faery, ineffable, haunting, sylph, enamoured, iridescence, lavender, spectre, eerie, luminescence, illicit, petrichor, perfumed, sublime, gossamer, lithe, ingenue ♡

as for books- I put so much of my faith and my heart in children’s books. it might have something to do with nostalgia, but I also believe that children’s books- especially older ones- are often so steeped in messages about light and love and generosity of the heart. and subtle, joyous threads of magic. my very favourites are ‘the little white horse’ by elizabeth gouge, ‘the secret garden’ and ‘the little princess’ by frances hodgson burnett, and ‘howl’s moving castle’ by diana wynne jones. when I find my mind to be ‘chaotic’ and unfocused, I know I can find solace in these books and others- there is a joy in rereading books over and over until reading them takes no effort at all, just like falling asleep or daydreaming.

if you, like me, are particularly drawn towards more ethereal and metaphysical elements of language, shakespeare is unparalleled- parts of ‘a midsummer night’s dream’, ‘the tempest’ and ‘romeo and juliet’ especially are truly, truly exquisite. similarly, there is some victorian and romantic poetry that is completely hauntingly beautiful. I adore ‘the lotos-eaters’ by tennyson, for instance, and absolutely anything by keats. I have been reading ‘to autumn’, of course, as it is late september- but I always return most of all to ‘ode to a nightingale’ when it comes to loneliness…

the passage where the monster is describing his flight in ‘frankenstein’ by mary shelley also makes me cry- it is also about loneliness, heartbreak, grief. and I feel so profoundly glad whenever I cry at a novel- it makes me feel human and connected to something and someone else and so relieves that ache of isolation. virginia woolf uses language in intricate and lovely ways too- ‘to the lighthouse’ and ‘orlando’ have such an innate musicality to them, they cut deep to what it is like to live and be alive. ‘jane eyre’ by charlotte bronte too, as well as ‘david copperfield’ by dickens and ‘adam bede’ by george eliot. they are long novels, and require patience and a little love, but perhaps finding a book like that might help relieve that ache for you too.

find a dream-like corner someplace quiet, light a candle, absorb yourself in someone else’s world and their troubles. please be kind to yourself, truly; you won’t feel like this forever. I promise you are not alone, and you may come and talk to me anytime, I promise I shall pay extra care to my inbox and private messages from now on. you have my sympathy and love and friendship if you need it angel ♡

[cupsofsuga]

𝐋𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄 ━ 𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐁𝐓𝐒 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍 *:·。.

{ ⚠️} WARNING - This is a yandere au, meaning the following may be triggering to some viewers.  I am not trying to discriminate the boys in any way, this is for entertainment purposes. Viewer discretion is advised!!!

{ ☕️} NOTE - this is in the order of the member’s obtained! thanks for the request, daisy! also, creds for idea goes to @bangtans-apollo​!!!

{ 💐} ANON ASKED - ❝ Headcanons on how the fanclub discovered each other and reacted to each other’s obsession for YN? ❞

━━━ 𝐊𝐈𝐌 𝐒𝐄𝐎𝐊𝐉𝐈𝐍

ah, the melancholic suffering of a lovelorn teenager

how he holds nothing but an eternity in the crevices of his heart

the serene sunlight, words dripped in saccharine, cloyed gestures

nothing hurts more than praying to whatever god truly exists that you’ll return the adoration but finding the fatal fate of no response

and that leaves jin now, seething with envy that could intimidate a pack of wolves

how dare the teacher not pair you up with your soulmate!? it’s just blasphemy!

someone gets to soak in the glitter of your presence, they get to bathe in the rain after a century in sunlight

all while he has to waste precious hours of his time with some plastic nobody

he has to waste time with bland, boring kim taehyung

he’s a dull star amongst a million planets, a saturated wasteland amongst an oasis of color

and how jin’s blood burns seeing that you flash that summer smile to someone who most certainly doesn’t deserve it

ditching the dinner date with his soulmate, jin is forced to work on this godforsaken project with the loner

if only you two had run away when you got the chance, relishing in each other’s warmth as he holds the privilege of looking into your eyes, which he finds resemble dewdrops held upon spider’s silk

that is the honeyed heaven he so badly craves to taste

and as he stumbles around taehyung’s adobe, the curiosity held within jin get’s the best of him as he stumbles into his bedroom

and oh god, what secrets did he uncover

your face, his lover’s face plastered all over the walls and ceiling

some even had his face punctured out of them, some taken without your consent, one’s that jin even took himself

and there’s that one sweater you once ranted to jin how you swore it vanished into thin air, and how he teased that ghost in your attic probably snatched it

if it was physically possible, there’d be steam seeping out of jin’s ears

he clutches his fists so tight, there would most likely be blood drawn; he clenches his teeth so tightly, he fears they might crack under the pressure

but, before jin turns tail, he then sees taehyung as fear swims in his irises

and then jin feels it,

a revelation, an act of generosity

❝ i think you could be useful… ❞

━━━ 𝐊𝐈𝐌 𝐓𝐀𝐄𝐇𝐘𝐔𝐍𝐆

with every breath he takes, there lies humiliation

shame, a ruthless emotion he swore he’d never live to see the depths of

the summer amongst the dark clouds, all lied on a silver platter for your supposed boyfriend to see

but there is kindness in jin’s eyes, a sliver of evil dripped with every word he speaks

and therein, we have witnessed the blooming of the “writing club,” whose only members were lovelorn kids who’ve infatuation got the best of them

with some sugar-laced words, jin had managed to maintain a room for their meetings after school, taehyung quickly ditching his art club for these fleeting moments spent with the man closest to his love

no, taehyung had never been fond of jin, but, holds undying respect for him, anyways

his heaven lies in his words, his sunlight is seen in his eyes, the fate he craves so desperately is clutched in his hands

and it’s only so long before his grip weakens, and taehyung can rob jin of his pleasures in his moment of vulnerability

but, that future must wait as it frolics in the back of taehyung’s head

he must gain the trust of your childhood best friend before he catches his infinity like a firefly in a jar

but, with that being said, taehyung doesn’t mind all the hours he spent huddled in the tree outside your house, hiding behind a canopy of leaves as he admires the dream before him

he’ll sketch your face (which he can now draw from memory) in his notepad, ethereal poetry and doodles held around your sparkling face

he’ll snap a few photos, catching the fireworks and shooting stars in the purity of the fleeting moment

to simply have the privilege to love you silently holds the light of a million stars

oh, how he loves you…

how the earth bruises your cheeks, the moon litters your skin, the stars possess your eyes and the rings of saturn held in your touch

there’s pure bliss within every heartbeat lept

and there’s only so much time before he has you all to himself

he just hopes no burden will stop him from such…

━━━ 𝐉𝐄𝐎𝐍 𝐉𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐊𝐎𝐎𝐊

the student’s that litter around these halls resemble parasites

all feeding off the others, annoying them with their deafening disunity, and all trailing behind others like burdens

but, there’s always been that one, that one that stands out like a sore thumb

bland, boring kim taehyung

a boy capable of summoning enough envy and rage within jungkook to crumble planets to nothing but ashes floating throughout the galaxy

how he denies his infatuation for you with red cheeks, but anyone with eyes can see those “adorable” dimples puncture his cheeks whenever he sees you in the halls

how he isn’t burdened by the overwhelming fate of unrequited love, drowning in his jealousy when you simply look at someone else

how he stalks in class you like a hawk would to prey, probably undressing you with his eyes like the freak he is!

how he simply exists, and how it makes jungkook churn with rage

and that leaves him now, dodging students as the race out of the school, hot on the tail of his rival

he must end him before he could potentially hold your heart in his hands

that single idea makes jungkook gag…

he hears taehyung’s voice, shoving a scoff back down his throat that could potentially jeopardize his identity

there’s another voice, too, but, jungkook assumes it’s another one of those art freaks who’s also pretentious with coincidences

then there’s your name, and it would’ve sounded like it was dripped in gold if it didn’t leave the mouth of his sworn enemy

and then he hears of this writing club, and jungkook seethes

these lowlifes get to breathe in the fragrance of those fleeting moments, which is a fate jungkook whose he is well-deserving of, not them

to simply touch the crevices of your soul carved in silk for just a mere second is a privilege

and letting these cretins possess that opportunity is simply unholy

despite holding a burning hatred for the rest of the memories, for you, jungkook would drag himself through the depths of hell

he just prays that the club members don’t pray too far under his skin

he doesn’t know if he can control himself.

━━━ 𝐊𝐈𝐌 𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐉𝐎𝐎𝐍

oh, y/n l/n…

an angel in the purest form, a humid june afternoon

they are a touch softer than autumn’s breeze, their word’s sharper than winter’s embrace, eyes starlit like the dreamy land of springtime, their presence like the bliss of summer and the melancholic longing after it’s demise

they hold within them the entire galaxy and namjoon can’t help but stare

but, there’s another pair of eyes

and they are burning bullet wounds into his soul with a craving to mutilate him swimming in their irises

as the bell rings its tumultuous song and deadbeat kids begin to litter the halls, namjoon is suddenly shoved against the locker by no other than the modern-day jeffrey dahmer

jeon jungkook, dust amongst a field of flowers

his sadistic pleasures and his lust for blood, the holy scent of iron that smoothes out all the creases

❝ if i catch you staring at my Y/N like that again, i’ll tear you apart limb from limb. ‘got it, dipshit? ❞

he is in all means terrifying, but, is nothing but a little boy to namjoon

time has passed, a damn near million tabs are held upon the screen all containing the history of namjoon and his family’s wealth

jin, who had been reported the incident by a fuming jungkook had found an opportunity in the depths of his teenage angst

he’ll feed into namjoon’s desire to touch you across hundreds of separating years

he’ll pray into his craving to kiss you as the naked moon sets for the final time

he’ll reach into his heart and use namjoon for his benefit

and how the rest of the members all fed off of his wealth like parasites

anything their little heart desired, they’d hold in their possession

as much as namjoon longs to deny them pleasure, he had been threatened to lose his place in the club and every inkling of access he has to you if he dared disobey

and namjoon would rather die than lose his love to the eternal night

the strange and enigmatic masterpiece, the ancient moon across a sea of stars

his violet lover has been sawed through by nostalgia, and his infatuation glows harder than a summer sunset

although jin’s intentions have a mile or two to run before they stab him in the back, namjoon still has a clear vision of his goal

and there shall be no burden before he meets his longed fate.

━━━ 𝐉𝐔𝐍𝐆 𝐇𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐎𝐊

you, a flower itself, flood his brains like a tsunami to a pitiful city

you, a strawberry in winter, hold sly ways of slithering your way into the recesses of his heart once more

that leaves jung hoseok here, letting the teacher’s words fade to white noise as he doodles your name adorned with hearts on flowers in his notebook

there is distant gossip and whispers that echo from afar, which hoseok picks up due to his childlike curiosity

it begun with useless chitter-chatter, then dissolving to the melodic sound of your name which tumbles from their lips

he listens as the two boys curse the teacher for giving you a D on your exam, them mentioning this supposed ‘club’ that circled everything around you

hoseok was smart, he could raise your grade!

oh, how hoseok would just die to help you with your studies!

with a paradise sparkling in his eyes, he sparks up a conversation with the group, also known as kim namjoon and jeon jungkook

but, the doe-eyed teenager hisses at him, barking at him to ‘keep his fucking mouth shut’

he takes the hint, leaving the conversation with a silent ocean welling up in his eyes

but, this is the embodiment of hope that sits in this dull classroom

he’ll crawl around the corners of his soul till he’s enervate to retrieve what he has longed for

and that leads us up to now, as hoseok stalks to the two from a safe distance, watching as they disappear to the writing club

and just before the door closes, hoseok peeks through the crack of the door and finds the identity of kim seokjin, a boy he’s seen accompany you multiple times

the following day, while the students all stare in confusion for the small boy walking through the halls, hoseok finds him and confronts him

by the look of purified fear, this ‘writing club’ was a hushed secret, and him knowing of this secret was dangerous enough, as it is

after negotiating about how he’d contribute to your satisfaction, jin had no choice but to accept his offer

he doesn’t want this loud-mouthed kid to run up and down the halls preaching about their sins, anyways

the rest of the club members didn’t favor his arrival, all shooting looks of envy and hatred

but, there was no other choice

their fate is written in the stars and complimented with a wax steal upon an envelope.

━━━ 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐉𝐈𝐌𝐈𝐍

opening his locker, jimin finds a taste of eden’s garden as he finds your face strung upon the wall

there’s irises, rivers, fairies, and peaches within the single picture cutout from the yearbook as he sighs dreamily at the sight

his daydream of honeyed days is quickly disrupted as his best friend, hoseok interrupts his thoughts with stars circling in his eyes

before he can find the words to scold him, hoseok begins rambling about this ‘club’ at a rate to fast for jimin to decipher

he hears tales of his dreams, a chance to taste your beauty

this most definitely sparked his undying interest, ushering his best friend to continue with his intentions to get the boy warped in this world

thus, we are taken to the night where the clock reads 3:38 AM in it’s bright, neon hues

the boys would never dream of staying up this late, especially on a tuesday night as the fear for the scolding of their parents’ echos, but, the adrenaline that seeps through their veins serves as a protection

because of the prophecy of this new club, they are rebelling

and as a new day rises and the sun shimmers in all of its celestial beauty, the boys have come up with a plan

every club needs a mission manager!

and who else would be perfect for this job no other than park jimin…? right?

well, let’s just say, despite his unreasonable, childish, and almost dangerous plans, the rest of the boys weren’t happy upon his arrival

the sighs of annoyance to his careless nature, the scoffs of envy when he speaks words of poetry about everything as little as when you made eye contact that one time 2 months ago

jimin’s contribution isn’t favored, but, if it’s for you, all 6 boys are willing to drag themselves through hell and back

every member holds an undying love for the god/goddess themself, all possessing a wild heart that they’d bled dry if you asked

and jimin is just one branch of the group who also holds an intense infatuation

the water to his parched heart, the flowering spring in a winter haze

he has found the sun as it shimmers against the snow

and nothing is as holy as this.

━━━ 𝐌𝐈𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐈

another dull day at the café, yoongi listens to his longing for spring’s voice

his hatred for this place burns bright and softly, as he dwells in the anger held within his small body

the college kids, the early morning joggers, all possessing ways of churning yoongi’s anger, one-by-one

obligated to put on a plastic smile for their sake has wars prancing through his head

but then, there’s you

oh, and those lively eyes he craves to gaze into for eternity and the soft furrow in your brow when you stare at the menu

he is mesmerized and listens to the songs of summer as he drowns in your stare

you haven’t taken notice to the hearts that swirl within his eyes as you order, unfortunately, and therefore leave a boy longing for a taste of the sun

during this fit of a daydream, 6 boys stumble in, all conversing at abnormally obnoxious levels

yoongi has to shove a scoff back down his throat and bring a halt to the urge to roll his eyes and dresses himself in the facade

as they all order and then continue their chatter elsewhere, yoongi can resume his illusions about your sparkled presence

whilst in the process of finishing a cappuccino, he hears the sugary melody of your name

he freezes, then concludes he must be hallucinating, resuming the process of the drink in his hands

after all, spending hours upon hours in this sacred place causes his mind to go hazy at times

the lilied waters of your eyes, skin like roses in the evening

you are so, so very loved by the boy at the café

starting up the hot chocolate with “extra sugar,” he hears it once more

does he need to stretch out his sleeping schedule or was this real?

were they truly speaking of you, or has he truly gone insane in the late afternoon?

peeking over his shoulder, that’s when yoongi sees it

your face was drawn upon a notepad, all fluttered hearts and empty petals around your face

the soul of the planets, the green pigment of the gardens, all held in this stranger’s arms

with determination, yoongi is required to learn more of this guest who spoke hushed tales of you

he’d do anything to know more about the star who enlightens his grey days

and now, the club is complete.

[ask-the-clergy-bc]

First Ritual

I’ll write a long and a TL;DR version. Long under the cut!! 

TL;DR - My first ritual was utterly fantastic!! 

~First and foremost, they passed my live band test with FLYING COLORS!! They sound SO GOOD, and some of my favorite songs sound BETTER live!! Getting to see Copia and the Ghouls interact was a treat. 

~Notable stage moments- Cardi putting a Papa dollar in Dewdrop’s pants because he plays guitar so well. Dew proceeded to snap his suspender and nod. Aether and Dew having a friendly guitar duel. The ghoulettes being their wonderful selves and dancing with the songs. And Papa Nil looking like he was going to faint after every solo and the stage hands having to help him up. That and Cardi told us Aether is made of muscle and good stuff and salad. His introduction for all the ghouls was perfect. He couldn’t find water for a second, either!! 

~All the people I met vip were awesome and I met another hardcore ghost cosplayer and we hung out- it was a blast!!!

~SOMEONE GAVE ME THEIR VIP PHOTO OP!!! So, it turns out the website I bought from failed to mention that (EVEN THOUGH LISTED AS A PERK) did not sell the vip package with the op. But one guy didn’t want his so the people who knew how crushed I was sent him my way!! I GAVE HIM THE BIGGEST HUG THANK YOU FELLOW FAN WHO I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO REPAY!!! 

~Got a LOT of compliments on my rings <3 People couldn’t believe I made them from clay.

~I MET CARDI C AND I MET TOBIAS FORGE AFTER THE SHOW!! HE’S SUPER NICE AND FRIENDLY AND SIGNED MY ITA BAG!! CARDI EVEN SQUEEZED MY HAND TIGHTER WHEN I IMPULSIVELY GRABBED IT TO TELL MY FEELINGS AHSAHDHSJDSAJDFJ

~10/10 would concert again. The music is great, the people are dedicated and awesome, and the atmosphere is fantastic. 

LONG VERSION WITH MY FEELINGS THESIS

So, I cannot get over the generosity of one fan last night. As it turns out, you should double check your ViP packages EVERY TIME!! The way I bought my ticket, it was implied or worded weird that if I bought one color it had the photo op. But, as I found out at the pass table, there were TWO packages (one of which wasn’t listed where I bought it). So the one guy explained it and felt bad, but there was nothing they could do. In fact, the other package was supposed to cost more. I was sUPER bummed and on the verge of tears, not gonna lie. But I went and took a lot of pictures with Papa III and of the others, because they were still on display (it was nice to get to see them!) 

Later, I just sat down to wait for the costume contest (did not place, but the people who did looked incredible!! (THERE WAS AN ELVIS PAPA AND OMDFNDJFSJD )). Later, as I was hanging out with another cosplayer this guy randomly comes up and offers to give me his op. I was so stunned, because that’s a huge deal!! Turns out that he rather have a good front row seat and the photo bleeds into the time to get one. I don’t know what force of nature or karma allowed this to happen, but I nearly cried. Apparently the other vip fan I made friends with and guy at the table pointed him my way. We ended up switching passes and I gave him a huge hug (people even aw’ed). I got ushered away and he took off before I could get his name. But truly, I will never forget what an insane act of generosity and kindness that was. I hope he got the front row view he wanted. 

There are truly some amazing people out in the world, and that guy is one of them. If I could talk to him again I’d hug him even more. Cheers to you, dude- we need more people in the world like you!! 

SO I got to meet Cardi C, and let me tell you he is delightful in character- and he’s taller than I expected him to be- especially with my shoes on!! Side note- DON’T WEAR BIG HEELS TO CONCERTS I CANT FEEL MY MIDDLE TOES!! XDXD But he complimented my outfit and I told him he should have worn his, we could have twinned!! I got an answer like, “aaah but I will wear mine later!” 

I think he said something else but I like panicked and impulsively reached out to take his hand. Normally I don’t touch people without permission, but my level of feels was through the roof. What was even better is that he let me AND SQUEEZED MY HAND TIGHTER. After I spurted out a, “IMSOSORRYFORGRABBINGYOURHANDBUT-” I finally got to tell him what Ghost meant to me, and all the personal things it helped me get through. I told him how it made me love music again, and thank you for what you do, and keep on at it. He didn’;t break eye contact and it was a very nice moment. I think he thanked me or said something, but I honestly can’t remember- I just remember looking down at his hands the moment I grabbed them and feeling him squeeze back. He ushered for me to take a pic, and after asking, let me put my arm around him!! It was a nice picture I think!! I haven’t seen them yet, but when they are posted I will share <3 

After that, he told me enjoy the show and I thanked him and said he was going to do fabulous. I skittered out of there as fast as I could, ngl. I don’t know how I didn’t have fangirl tears!! 

THE SHOW WAS GREAT!! As I said above, a total delight and sounded good. It was fantastic when the crowd sung Faith, Square Hammer, Year Zero, and Monstrace Clock together. They sound soooo good live. Bonus was a gent filming didn’t even mind that I was screaming next to him. 

After, I went out back to the tour bus. It actually didn’t take as long. One of the ghoulettes came out, but no one recognized her but one guy next to me. Then Chris Catalyst came out, and the crowd cheered- idk what happened or if he waved because they were blocking my view. Unfortunately, did not do signings but hey- he deserves a break. 

THE GUY WORKING THE VENUE WAS SO NICE!! He helped us set up and set up a line so we could meet Tobias. It’s so weird seeing him in person, especially when all you see is pictures. He’s super sweet and it’s neat to see him out of character and being himself. Very nice dude, and it made me happy to know.

I told him the show was fantastic, and it was my first ritual- I had a blast. He smiled and didn’t break eye contact, so he was making sure he listened to each of his fans. 

I went on to tell him about ya’ll. I didn’t go into detail but I said I run a Ghost blog and that a lot of us on here have gotten through some tough times thanks to Ghost. I told him how a lot of fans feel safe and better having Ghost and what he made for us. I also said that it especially means a lot to his LBGTA fans. It’s something I had been thinking on and wanted him to know, call it strange. It was something I felt like he would be happy to know, and something I would want to be told if I was in his shows. Call me odd, but I told him how much it means to have a safe space where fans can relate- and how his characters like Copia and Papa III were super relatable. Again, I thanked him for being so open and having such a loving space for his fans. He thanked me in return.

Then I asked him to sing my ita bag, and I was delighted because HE WAS SUPER IMPRESSED! He actually held my bag and looked at all the pins. He asked about it and I went on to say how some of them were from fans and where I found them. Tobias pointed out which ones he knew and could tell what was what, but he pretty much said, “I just have never seen them altogether like this!!” It was awesome to know he thought it was cool and the staff next to him also loved my bag too!! I even got to explain what the fad of ita bags was as he signed. 

I then stood awkwardly for a few heartbeats as I debated whether I should ask for a hug or not, and he patiently waited for me to say anything if I was going to. Thank you Tobias for knowing the fan struggle of words! XD I didn’t but I didn’t feel the need to. Though I think he would of had I asked! I’m grateful he loves his fans enough to do that. 

After that I went home. But, omg ya’ll- if you have the opportunity definitely go to see them! No words can describe how much it means that my first ritual went to wonderfully well <3 Now excuse me, I will catch up on RP’s and Asks!! XD 

[makotokyoqoku-archived]

who said i was an angel?

[makotokyoqoku-archived]

what a great day to remember that america chavez is an afro-latina lesbian. @ marvel when is she gonna get a girlfriend?

[makotokyoqoku-archived]

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[makotokyoqoku-archived]

@voidfort HONESTLY SAME thats exactly the very reason why all of my stories have muslims and arabs in them because there arent enough of them and if there are, they are mostly stereotyped and im fucking tired of this. thats exactly the reason why i started making arabs and muslim characters.

[makotokyoqoku-archived]

ahem. please go read The Different Degrees of Suffering by KamalasFanfiction of AO3 because its the most beautifully well-written fic that focuses on damian wayne's struggles in american schools as an arab, and seeing this type of thing means so much to me. i love this fic with my entire heart. please read it.

[makotokyoqoku-archived]

i. literally stopped writing in a middle of a fic to write another fic of another ship because i cant get a certain idea out of my hea d.

[makotokyoqoku-archived]

you know i had a thought a few days ago about pharah's popular line, "justice rains from above" and how she and her mother are muslims; God is just and fair. "justice rains from above" doesnt mean that she is the one dealing justice, it means that God will do it...

[makotokyoqoku-archived]

when you look at me, what do you see?

[makotokyoqoku-archived]

hi hello this is your passive aggressive friendly fucking REMINDER THAT BTS ARE HUMAN BEINGS NOT FICTIONAL CHARACTERS AND YOU SHOULDNT MAKE UP HEADCANONS OF FUCKING HUMAN BEINGS AS IF THEY WERE FICTIONAL CHARACTERS

i.e. posting a pic of a convo and saying "this is jungkook" like bitch shut the fuck up and go outside for a change how about that. hes real, hes human, he isnt a fucking fictional character for you to make hcs about.

[makotokyoqoku-archived]

god. i actually still love the bratz dolls so much like they played a large role in my life growing up...