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asirensrage · 2 years ago

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Caught in the Crossfire - 3/53

Title: Caught in the Crossfire Rating: M Pairings: Michelle (OC) x Sam side pairing: Kelly (OC) x Dean Fandom: Supernatural. Includes characters from BtvS, The Darkest Powers Series by Kelley Armstrong, True Blood, Veronica Mars, X-Men, Harry Potter Warnings: PTSD, trauma, violence, murder, loss of time, demonic possession, mentions of starvation, anger, slow burn, learning to fight and survive Summary: Takes place during s5. Michelle was just trying to gain some semblance of normality. She didn’t expect to be a part of a fail-safe for the apocalypse. Reuniting with her best friend who should be dead, she struggles with trying to survive this world while being forced into a position that has her taking care of others who also don’t belong. She just wants to go home.

Notes: and we're back to Michelle's POV

also on ffn and ao3

Chapter 3: Balance and Solidarity

You get nothin' for nothin' Tell me who can you trust - If You Want Blood (You Got It) by AC/DC

I woke up slowly. It felt like I had slept for weeks. My head felt groggy. My eyes felt like they were sealed shut. I rubbed them hard to get them open. I was lying on the cot in the panic room. It was still real. It wasn’t a dream.

I sat up slowly. Despite not feeling anywhere near awake, I felt okay. I didn’t feel like everything hurt, or that I was suffering from starvation. It was odd. I stood up and I didn’t feel like I was going to fall.

I looked around the room. The cold iron was comfortable to have around me, but I headed to the door. I needed to figure out what was happening. I needed to find Kelly.

The door was open. The basement was ominous when it was empty. I headed up the stairs. When I got to the top, I paused. Kelly was coming in the back door with Dean following her.

“Kels?”

She grinned at me. “Mish!” She walked up to me. I hugged her tightly. I felt her stiffen before she hugged me back. “This is weird,” she muttered.

“I wasn’t sure you were real,” I said. “I thought I was dreaming.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” she whispered. “We’re okay. We gotta whole lot of weird to deal with, but we’re okay.”

I let go and pulled back. “What happened?”

“You’ve been asleep for two days. Castiel knocked you out.” She looked back at Dean.

“He healed you,” Dean said. “Least, physically.” I nodded. That explained how I felt okay, at least, to a point.

“Hey, not to like...push things,” Kelly said, looking over at Dean. “But we kind of need a huge favour. I smell. Jane smells. Mish...definitely smells.” I went to protest then stopped myself. She wasn’t wrong. “We need to go shopping for essentials. I don’t know about them, but I didn’t need to change as a ghost. Pretty sure that Jane stole the clothes she’s wearing.” Kelly looked at me.

“I didn’t have time to grab anything. I left with what I had,” I tried not to think about the diner and how I only had time to run.

“We’ll...also need to use your credit cards.”

“Right,” Dean said. He looked both of us over before he nodded. “I’ll grab Sam. Find Jane and meet us at the car.”

My eyes widened and I looked at Kelly. “ The car?”

“Oh god,” Kelly muttered. She looked at Dean. “Now you’ve done it.” She turned back to me. “Best friend comes back from the dead, you’re merely happy. Get to ride in the Impala? Exuberant. I see where I stand.” I hit her, smacking her shoulder with my hand. It felt instantly like she had never left. My throat tightened, remembering what it was like when she died.

“Five minutes!” I jumped at Dean’s voice as he moved past us.

“Mish, you’re starting to scare them.”

I jolted out of my staring. “Sorry,” I muttered. The car was beautiful. It was pretty much exactly what it looked like in the show. I stepped forward. Both the men were watching. “I’m sorry,” I said louder. “It’s just...it’s a beautiful car.”

Dean grinned and nodded. “Damn right she is. Get in.”

Sam opened the back passenger door. Jane entered first, looking around the car slowly. I went next and Kelly came in after me. I looked around. The leather bench seats felt real and there were some wrappers on the floor. I couldn’t stop my excitement. It still felt surreal but for a second, it was almost like I could forget everything that brought me here. I leaned over the front seat as the boys got in.

“Dean! Can you play AC/DC and blast it?” I asked. I heard Sam groan but Dean gave a small laugh and popped in a tape. The sound of TNT came on and I started to sing along.

“I thought you were terrible at staying awake in cars?” Kelly half yelled. She had never been a fan of loud music.

“I am!” I yelled back. She sighed, closed her eyes and leaned her head against the window. The music would help keep me awake.

Jane leaned over from next to me. “I do not understand your affection for this noise.”

“It’s not noise,” I said. “It’s music. Good music.”

“Hell yeah!” Dean said up at the front, banging his hands against the steering wheel to the beat. The music continued without further protest. After a few songs, the car finally slowed to a stop. We were in front of a Walmart.

“We’re here.” Sam turned to face us. “Go in, get what you need and we’ll call you. Here.” He started to hand a cellphone to Jane before he realized who it was and gave it to me. “Take my cell. We’ll be back in a bit to pay for everything.”

Kelly opened her eyes and sat up. “You aren’t coming in?” I paused. I hadn’t considered that. I looked out the window. There were people in there. People who didn’t know about the truth of this world, people who could be things that weren’t human.

“You need us to hold your hands?” Dean looked over the seat. “Unless you’re planning on running off, you don’t need us standing ‘round while you shop. We’re going for food. We’ll be back in half an hour. If anyone else but me calls, you don’t answer.” He pointed at me. I nodded automatically. “Now go!”

Kelly turned and opened the door. I didn’t move. There was so much that could go wrong. Jane pushed on my back. I went out slowly.

The boys drove off and I stared at the store, instantly regretting coming. I should have just told them to buy me things and to guess at the size. There were too many people here.

“Hey,” I looked over at Kelly. “It’ll be okay.”

“Yeah,” I said. I didn’t tell her that the thought of going in there, being surrounded by people who could be anything, was making my heart pound and my palms sweat. “Let’s get this over with quickly.”

I stared at the mirror. It was odd looking at myself. My brown hair fell limp against my head. My cheeks were a little sunken. I used to think my eyes were my best feature. Now they just looked haunted.

Nothing fit. Not like it was supposed to. I had never been thin back home, but the stress of this world had played havoc on me. I used to wear a large in shirts because of my stomach and chest. Now it felt too big. The only thing that hadn’t changed was the size of my feet.

“Michelle?” I jumped slightly at Kelly’s voice. I hadn’t wanted either of them out of sight, but that didn’t work when it came to trying on clothes. “You done?”

“Yeah,” I opened the change room door. “I need new sizes though.”

“In what?”

“Everything.”

“Really?” she looked me up and down. “Well, I guess you are thinner. Come on,” she said. “I need you to help me convince Jane to wear a bra.”

“What?”

“She says, and I quote, the contraptions are confusing and a binding is easier.”

“Where is she now?” I asked.

“At the knives. She tried stuff on and once it fit, she left it in my basket. She’s still wearing the bindings but I took the bras in her size and added it to the stuff.” Kelly motioned to a cart she had next to her. “Come on, let’s grab the sizes you need and find her before the boys call. She’s demanding we grab work out clothes or clothes you can move freely in.”

“What? Why?”

“Hell if I know!” Kelly raised her hands in the air and then dropped them. She looked frustrated, which was understandable. “Come on, we also need essentials. Like toothbrushes and deodorant. Don’t tell the guys but I’ve been using whoever’s deodorant is in the bathroom. I smell like a dude.”

“It’s probably Bobby’s…”

“Eh…” she shrugged. “Then he’s even less likely to know or complain. Come on, maybe we can freak the guys out and buy a ton of tampons. After all we are three girls and it's bound to happen eventually.”

By the time the boys had called and found us, we were ready to go.

“You sure you got everything?” Dean asked, looking at the full cart. “You don’t need more? Like the kitchen sink?”

“What’d you expect with three women who literally only have the clothes on their backs?” Kelly said.

“You guys didn’t even get coats,” he said, peering into the cart.

“We got coats. And layers.” She pulled out one of the thin coats we had grabbed. It was more of a fall type of coat.

“It’s freaking freezing outside and you’re telling me you just got that?”

Kelly and I both looked at each other.

“It’s not that cold?” I phrased it like a question even if I didn’t mean it that way.

“It’s twenty degrees!” Dean looked like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

I frowned. “What? It’s not hot out.”

“He means Fahrenheit,” Kelly said leaning towards me. “It’s like...maybe minus ten?”

“Dean,” Sam said. The cashiers were watching us now. “They’re Canadian, remember?”

“Yeah,” Kelly said. “This isn’t cold. I mean, it’s cold, but it’s not fuck my face cold.”

“Oh yeah,” I said. “Now that’s cold.” Both the boys stared at us in shock.

“Don’t worry, if we need to, I’m sure we can come back, right?” she grinned at him, “this is a relationship I could get used to.”

Dean turned away, grumbling under his breath as the cashier rang everything up. I would have felt bad if I hadn’t known they were using a credit card with a fake name. There was no plan to actually pay for any of this.

The cashier was flirting with Dean while giving us dismissive once overs. Everyone in the store had given us looks, though not as much as they would have in any other place. We were not the oddest thing in Walmart. Another woman came up to the cashier, smiling and looking over at Sam. I leaned over to Kelly.

“I think the environment’s getting a little hostile,” I tried to tease. It didn’t quite feel right but I was just trying to relieve some of the tension I felt.

Kelly rolled her eyes. “No kidding.” She made a face as one of the women laughed and I tried not to smile at it. Instead, I turned to Sam and handed him back the phone that I was still holding.

“Here.”

“Thanks,” he took it and quickly pocketed it. “You get used to it,” he said.

“Hmm?” I looked up at him, not entirely sure what he meant.

He motioned at Dean and the cashiers. “Them. It takes longer but he’s flirting and they haven’t noticed that they haven’t actually scanned everything they’re passing through.”

“Oh!” I had never even thought of that. Dean flirting with you would be a distraction. I turned to look and sure enough, the girl flirting back didn’t notice when one of the shirts she slid over the scanner didn’t scan. “Wow.”

“Yeah,” he said. “It usually works, though occasionally not well with certain old ladies.”

I snorted, then covered my mouth with my hand trying to hide my giggles. I could see Kelly looking at me confused but I could perfectly imagine Dean trying and failing to flirt with an old lady. It felt like forever since I had laughed. I stopped, realizing the truth in that. I definitely hadn’t laughed since I left the diner but before that…before that was rare too. Even before leaving my world, I didn’t laugh much after Kelly died.

The shower was heaven. I didn’t realize how filthy I was until I kept washing. I eventually had to force myself to stop. Scrubbing my skin raw wasn’t going to erase the memories that were burned into me.

I couldn’t sleep. Every time I closed my eyes, the demon was waiting for me. The memories of the blood and the bodies were there. I looked around the dark room that Bobby had offered up to us. Kelly had dragged me upstairs to force me to shower and catch up. She had passed out while I had showered. I didn’t want to leave her, but I couldn’t sleep. She was sprawled across the bed and facing away from me. I stared at her for a moment, watching her breathe. It was still real. She was still here.

I climbed over her carefully. Jane wasn’t in the room but there were sounds coming from the main floor. I went to the washroom to clean up before I headed down the stairs, trying to be as quiet as possible. It wasn’t that I wanted to hide my presence, but I hadn’t had much interaction with the men outside of the first meeting and shopping. I was far too aware that people generally said more than they intended to when they didn’t realize you could hear them.

It wasn’t anything more than “pass me that book”. I moved closer. I caught sight of the clock. It was just after two in the morning. It didn’t feel like we had been upstairs that long. I didn’t want to intrude on the men. I just...I couldn’t be in the dark anymore. Even if it was slightly better feeling someone sleeping next to me, it just brought me back to nights alone. I couldn’t stay in that room, but I didn’t really have anywhere to go. I wanted Kelly to wake up so I wasn’t alone.

“You gonna stand there all day or come in?” I looked up, startled at Bobby’s voice. I had made it to the doorway without realizing it.

“Yeah, sorry,” I said, quickly stepping into the room. “I just…” I trailed off, unsure of what to say.

“Keep moving,” Dean appeared behind me, beer in hand. He ushered me further into the room before walking around me. “We have some questions for you.”

“Questions?”

Dean sat down in a chair and looked up at me. All of them were sitting and looking at me. It was a little surreal and really unnerving. Anxiety started to creep up my spine.

Sam stood up. “Why don’t you sit down?” He moved a stack of books off of a chair before pushing the chair towards me.

“Thanks,” I said. I stayed standing. It felt like I was being ganged up on already and my body was gearing up, as if ready to run. “What questions?”

Dean leaned forward. “How old are you?”

“What’s that got to do with anything?” I asked, confused at the topic.

“Fact-checking,” he said.

I frowned. That didn’t make any sense. “Fact…” I looked at all of them, watching their expressions when it clicked. “Like a lie detector. You already know the answers, but you want to see if I’ll give the same ones.” I scoffed and shook my head.

“Answer the question.”

Anger welled up in me and I suddenly pictured taking up the book near him and hitting him with it, over and over, just to make him stop looking at me like that. Like I was something he needed to hunt. I shoved the intrusive thought out of my head and took a deep breath. I could work with this.

“Only if you answer mine,” I said. I waited as the brothers looked at each other before Dean nodded. “I’m twenty-seven. Where in the timeline are we?” They looked confused so I elaborated. “How long ago did you release Lucifer out of the cage?”

Sam shifted in his seat before answering quietly. “About four months ago.”

I nodded. The timeline was confusing. It didn’t match up with the show if Kelly was already into the next season. I remembered what Kelly said about how long I was gone. Time worked differently.

“How did you get into…this world?” Sam asked. I frowned at him. I told this story. This had to be more fact-checking. A good way to see if people were telling the truth was to ask them the same question at different times, see if they had the same answer.

“I walked,” I said. “I was job hunting, walking around and handing out resumes. Not a lot of work for someone who dropped out of a university master’s program. Least, nowhere I wanted to work. I walked out of a store and suddenly I was just on a dirt road. There was no sign of anything. I didn’t even realize the scenery was different until after I took that step. I looked back and there was just…more road.” I stared at the bookshelf, thinking back into the moment. I had panicked. I had screamed. I was just so confused.

“You didn’t feel anything?”

I jolted out of my thoughts, looking around the room as I remembered where I was. Sam was leaning forwards, his arms on his knees and a concerned look on his face.

I shook my head. “No. It was just one second in the city and the next somewhere I had never even seen before.” My throat tightened. The fear from that moment had never quite left. I tried to change the subject. “What happened after I...after Castiel knocked me out? Is there a plan?”

“You’re staying here,” Bobby said. “For now.” There was a slight threat lingering there but I didn’t pay any mind to it. That was understandable. I opened my mouth to thank him but he stopped me. “Don’t thank me just yet. We still don’t know why you’re here…or how to get you home.”

Home. I swallowed tightly and clenched my jaw. I took a deep breath. Gods, all I wanted was to go home. To tell my family I was alive and that I was okay. Sort of. I tried not to think about the fact that it might not be possible.

“What happened after that?”

I looked sharply at Dean. “I already told you that.”

“So tell it again,” he said.

“Dean…” Sam called out. Both of us ignored him.

“No,” I said. I crossed my arms over my chest and stared at him. “When you said you wanted to ask questions, I figured it was something about what I knew about you. Not the Spanish inquisition. I didn’t agree to be put on trial.”

“That’s not what’s happening here,” Sam said.

“Isn’t it?” I snapped, looking at him. “You waited until I was alone, most likely still sleep-deprived despite being put into a coma by an angel, and traumatized considering what you know I’ve been through so far so that you could force whatever truth you want out of me? Way to go. Points to you for trying to take advantage of what I’ve dealt with so far.” I gave a hard smile before turning to walk away. I had enough.

“Michelle,” Jane stood in the entranceway to the room. Her red curls were wild, looking as if she had been running through trees and had caught pieces of them in it. I had no idea how long she had been there or how much she heard. “You’re awake. I wish to speak with you.” I tried not to sigh. So did everyone it seemed.

“Wait your turn darling,” Dean said from behind me. “We’re not done.”

“The hell we aren’t,” I snapped.

Jane walked towards me and looked at the men. “I care not for your trivial words, man-child. I wish to speak with her and so I shall. Presently.” Jane took my wrist and pulled me out of the room. She let go once we were in the hallway but motioned for me to follow her. She led me out of the house. The air was crisp and I could almost see my breath. I went as far as the porch.

She stopped once she realized I was not following further. She sat down on the ground at the bottom of the stairs and motioned for me to join her. I sat on the top stair and waited. I didn’t know her. I had no idea what she wanted, but I was nervous. Again, I wished Kelly was with me.

“What did you want to speak about?” I finally asked.

“You were uncomfortable,” she leaned back on her hands. “No man should make a woman uncomfortable. If we were in my world, he would pay for the disservice.”

I stared at her for a moment. Woman solidarity transcended worlds. I had to admit, that was kind of cool. “Thanks.” She nodded in return and it was silent for a moment before I spoke again. “Why outside?”

Jane seemed to sigh. “This world is stifling. All these…machines and steel. You take no pride in what the Goddess gifts you and your world is lacking.” She looked up to the sky. “The stars will not even shine here.” I watched her for a moment. There was a look on her face that almost seemed sad and resigned. She looked back at me. “Despite this, I am more free outside, more connected to the earth than when I am within those walls.”

“Will you tell me about your world?” I asked.

She smiled and it seemed to lighten her entire face. She suddenly looked so much younger than I expected. “It is very different from this one. We do not have these barriers between ourselves and the earth, nor do we have the same machines. All are welcomed and cherished by the Goddess. Women are the leaders of our clans; we hunt and provide for our young ones and the ones who cannot care for themselves any longer….”

The sun rose as we spoke. Everything in Jane’s world sounded rather primitive compared to what I was used to…but also nice. You could hear how much she cared for her community, and it was a community. They took care of each other in their clans. A cooperative living environment. Something that would rarely happen in our society, and if it did, would be looked down upon by others. It sounded like I would have been much safer had I landed in her world instead of this one.

It also explained a lot about Jane. She was a leader in her clan, in line to become the head. A skilled hunter and fighter, often in the front lines of any skirmishes they had with other clans or animals. It made me wonder.

“What do you think of this? Of…being here?”

She didn’t hesitate before answering. “It is a trial from my Goddess and I will prove myself worthy of her.” She looked determined, and I was tempted to dig further, to know why she thought this was a test and if she thought we’d ever return. I just wanted someone to know and she seemed so confident that I would believe her. Or pretend I did.

My stomach growled suddenly and Jane looked at me sharply. She stood up quickly.

“You need sustenance. Go, find yourself food. If they deny you it, inform me. I do not trust these men and I shall deal with them if I must.”

“I’m sure it won’t come to that,” I said as I stood up. “Despite everything, they are good men. They’re just…stressed. Like all of us.” I gave her a small smile. “Thank you.” She nodded at me and I turned and walked inside.

I passed Sam in the hallway who was on the phone, heading towards the back door. I walked into the kitchen and stiffened. I forgot it was connected to the library. Dean was leaning into the fridge. He looked up when he heard me and straightened. I pressed my lips together as we both tried to figure out how to proceed. I took a deep breath and tried to let go of any residual anger that I felt from earlier. It wouldn’t do any good.

“Got anything light to eat?” I asked tentatively. An awkward peace offering if any.

“Uh, not really,” he looked back in the fridge. He looked up at me, confused. “Can’t you eat normal? Cas healed you.”

I hadn’t thought about that. “I don’t know. I...I haven’t eaten in days. Better safe than sorry,” I shrugged. The thought of eating felt strange after days of trying to scavenge.

He seemed to think about it, his head tilted as he nodded. “Soup?”

I sighed before nodding. “Sure. I’ll try it.”

“Cans are on the shelf next to the sink. Pots under it.” He motioned. He finally closed the fridge and poured himself a cup of coffee. It didn’t look fresh.

I opened the cupboards, looking at the cans of soup. Suddenly, the thought of making food exhausted me. I closed the cupboard and opened one after another until I found cups. I grabbed some water from the sink and leaned against the counter. I drank one cup and then another. I held back on drinking more. I knew better than to drink too quickly, I just wanted the hunger to subside.

“Not eating?” Dean was staring at me, taking a sip of his drink.

I shook my head before looking at him. “I’m tired. Can’t be bothered to make anything.”

Dean made a noise as if he agreed. “Sam’s grabbing food.”

I nodded, though it wasn’t likely it’d be anything I could eat, or wanted to. “I’ll make soup later.”

He didn’t say anything but didn’t leave either. It was awkward and I felt like I should say more. I could see Bobby in the library. Sam, I assumed, was gone. I had no idea if Jane was where I left her. I pushed away from the counter, put the glass in the sink and walked away.

taglist: @raith-way @arrthurpendragon @veetlegeuse @chickensarentcheap @nejires-hado @residentdormouse @endless-oc-creations @stanshollaand @wordspin-shares @chrissymunson

#fic: caught in the crossfire #fic update #fyeahspnocs #sam winchester x oc #dean winchester x oc #well dean x oc is the side pairing

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