#funnier in my head

[milk-ducts]

dont drag me on here,, this is how i cope

[puppy-rats]

please internet I can't ship ford with the fucking triangle stop invading my brain

[captainwaffles]

Will: thanks for coming with me to visit my mom Nico

Nico hearing cicadas for the first time: why are the trees screaming!!

[metashard]

[le-agent-egg]

whatever

[sordidmusings]

Sanji: ah, love! A quick question. Any reason you keep requesting pineapple? Is it your favorite?”

Y/n: *glances nervously at the Buggy Bag*

Y/n: uhh, yeah! Totally!! No other reasons at all!!

[dyinggirldied]

Maddie the cat eloped with Alfred the cat.

One fine day the Wayne family wakes up to find another cat in their home (possible even pregnant) and the shady millionaire Vlad Masters publicly declared war on them.

Danny is enjoying this with his popcorns.

[wibbley-wobble]

Miss Pauling: Um, I don’t swing that way

Scout: Wow! You play baseball too?

[blood-red-ocean]

It's always 'where is that filthy manthing' and never 'HOW is that filthy manthing'

[coiled-dragon]

Man this sucks I need to (remembers that suicide jokes only worsen your mental health and that the first step to healing is stopping) make a deal with Bill Cipher

[akascow]

*actively running away from babydoll demon spider in hell*

charles: hey hotstuff fancy seeing you here

edwin: charles i appreciate the sentiment but now really is not the best time

[bioshocked-astroghost]

Forest Keepers will see a hardworking employee just trying to make a fucking living and be like “is anyone going to eat that” and then not wait for an answer

[orphic-exe-archived]

“kill them with kindness” WRONG. FLOWER POWER 🌺🌸🌺🌸🌼🌺🌸🌺🌹🌺🌸💐🌺🌺🌼🌺🌸🌺🌹🌸🌼🌸🌼🌺🌷🌸🌼🌺🌷🌼🌹🌷🌼🌷🌹🌷🌷🌷🌹🌸🌺🌷

[whenyourehome]

jeremy: it's pride month, keanu reeves. you know what that means.

jeremy's squip: huh. what

jeremy's squip: do you want us to make like. gay squips. what

[aprofessionalwithoutstandards]

Idk why but it feels like high-up administrative positions are for she/hers and dying violently in the gravel war is for he/hims

[edgy-dragon-trash]

Adding to the list of men Ganondorf is mega divorced to.