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Rewriting Veilguard Part 1 - The World State
Disclaimer: I don't hate the game, I actually think it's quite great given the development hell Bioware went through in those 10 years. This is more of a hypothetical universe where there was less of that behind the scenes drama. Just a fun writing exercise.
Expanding Veilguard's World State Editor
Like many of us, I was disappointed with the total amount of choices carrying over from past games being only three, one of which dealt with romance, two with decisions made in the Trespasser DLC, and all of them being from Inquisition. This already set the precedent that we shouldn’t really be expecting the game to be as connected to our unique Thedas as we have come to be used to from previous titles—no more uniquely flavoured codex entries, no more small but sweet cameos here and there that make the world itself feel like a larger place that we had helped shape.
Given The Veilguard’s very troubled production history of multiple delays, staff layoffs, and all-around restarts of the entire project, it is honestly a surprise that we even got three choices, so credit where credit is due. They made with what they had. But what if The Veilguard had this vision from the start? What if there wasn’t any of this meddling? What if Bioware simply had more time and control? What if they could truly let us import the World State this game deserved?
Now, for this hypothetical rewritten playthrough, I’m going off from the fact that the Dragon Age Keep will not be used; I actually found it a neat idea to tick my three choices in the character creator, and it would have probably been better had Inquisition done something similar. Why do I think that? Because it means we are not running into any dangers of servers potentially shutting down, leaving us trapped in the canon we happened to have imported last. Converting the Keep into an offline editor was a good idea, but unfortunately not executed nearly enough as, let’s face it, we all expected. So we’re gonna have some fun for Veilguard.
Disclaimer: I’m going to refer to the game’s title as Veilguard from now on, not “the” Veilguard. I really don’t like the change of having a “the” in a series of otherwise one-word, or one-number, titles.
Of course, we have to be realistic about this. It is virtually impossible to implement every single decision from across all three games, and those that can be implanted can’t alter the main plot too much. Certainly, we like to imagine and picture things, but let’s approach this from an actually doable point of view.
Right, so imagine you just finalised your Rook, and then get a screen titled “Past Adventures”. Not just “The Inquisition”. And it would take up the entire screen instead of being shoved somewhere in the corner of the final CC page, which many people missed. I could have missed it too, had I not known beforehand that it was going to be there!
It would say something akin to “You can customise the protagonists and several events from the games Dragon Age: Origins, Dragon Age II, and Dragon Age: Inquisition. These choices will have both major and minor effects on the plot of Veilguard. If this is your first Dragon Age title, you would be advised to skip this section for now, as you may otherwise risk getting overwhelmed. A default World State has been pre-generated for the game.”
Why did I add this disclaimer? Because it would show us, right from the get-go, that we respect both new and old players. If you’re a new player, feel free to skip this part as it won’t matter to you anyway and, quite frankly, you wouldn’t want to spend an eternity in the character creator doing things you might not even be familiar with. But if you’re a returning player or someone who has read up on recaps and watched countless lore videos, come on right in, we’ve got you covered, don’t worry! We know how much time you spent meticulously crafting your World State for Inquisition, so join us and customise to your heart’s content.
If you choose to not skip ahead (honestly the only time I would click “skip” on that shit is if I was a new player), you will be presented with three tarot cards, one shows the griffon, the Grey Warden symbol, one shows Kirkwall’s heraldry, and one shows the Inquisition’s banner. Here’s your previous three games. And now we get to customise them a little. The little gremlin in me would be quite gleefully rubbing his hands at this prospect.
Past Adventures: The Blight
We open the first slide and are immediately hit with a crimson screen and an ambient reprise of several of Inon Zur’s themes from DAO. I loved this part in the game, when you click to customise your Inquisitor and are immediately hit with “Calling the Inquisition”. Really great stuff for early emotions. Now let’s actually customise things.
The Hero of Ferelden
I do not expect us to actually be able to recreate the Warden in the flesh, but I believe they should be at least brought up in conversation or mentioned in codex entries and letters. Here are the things we get to customise about them specifically:
The Hero: Here, we get to tick the race, gender, class, and background for our Warden. Again, no character creator, just fancy tarot cards. But guess what? That would already be more than enough for what we can do. At least we know the game acknowledges their continued existence.
The Warden’s fate: Did the Hero of Ferelden perform the ultimate sacrifice?
Romance: Who did your Warden romance, if at all?
The Companions
Now that our Warden is set, we jump over to DAO’s companions. Each companion has their own little mini-section. The first few questions will always be “Did you even recruit them? And if so, did they survive? If so, were you on good terms or not?” These questions, depending on the answers, will immediately lock or open the more specific ones. Which are, as follows:
Did the Warden have Morrigan perform the Dark Ritual?
What is Alistair’s ultimate fate?
Was Sten reunited with his sword?
What happened to Loghain?
What happened to Marjorlaine?
The Battle of Ostagar
What happened to the prisoner at Ostagar?
The Arl of Redcliffe
What is Connor’s fate?
Is Isolde alive?
Did you help Bevin and return his sword?
The Urn of Sacred Ashes
What happened to the Urn?
The Nature of the Beast
How was the situation between the Dalish and the werewolves resolved?
A Paragon of Her Kind
What happened to the Anvil of the Void?
Who rules Orzammar?
Did the Warden help Brother Burkel create a Chantry in Orzammar?
Did the Warden prove the Legion of the Dead was connected to a noble house?
Did Orta join the Assembly?
Warden’s Keep
What happened to Sophia and Avernus?
Denerim
Did the Warden complete Slim Couldry’s crime wave?
Who rules Ferelden?
Who killed Urthemiel?
Awakening
What happened to Nathaniel?
What happened to the Architect?
What happened to Vigil’s Keep and Amaranthine?
As you can see, I have not included all the choices, just the ones I think can be carried over in both realistic and interesting manners. Not all of them will heavily feature in the game; in fact, many of them are for flavour and codex entries only, but there is still merit in those. We know there is a whole lot of stuff happening in the South thanks to the letters the Inquisitor regales us with. So let’s put some world-state uniqueness to those letters. But in this rewrite, some of these choices will, in fact, feature in a more substantial manner.
And that’s Dragon Age: Origins done! Moving on to the next one!
Past Adventures: The Tale of the Champion
When we enter this screen, the CC assumes Kirkwall’s orangey-yellow tone and we get a reprisal of the key DA2 themes by Inon Zur, the most prominent one being, of course, Hawke’s family theme. This one is not going to be as big as DAO, but there are a few important factors nevertheless, especially concerning possible deaths and survivals.
The Champion of Kirkwall
Unlike the Hero of Ferelden, Hawke will actually be customisable in this one. Because no matter whether or not they were sent to the Fade or Weisshaupt, there is always the potential for them to still be alive. So, here are the choices regarding Hawke:
The Champion: Here you can customise Hawke’s gender, class, and personality.
Who did Hawke romance, if at all?
The Party
Pretty much every companion’s card, aside from a few, will have the questions “Did you recruit them?”, “Are they still alive?”, and “Were they friend or rival to Hawke?” at the forefront. Most of it is gonna be flavour, but it’s still my flavour, dammit!
What happened to Bethany or Carver?
What happened to Isabela and the Tome of Koslun?
What happened to Fenris and Danarius?
What happened to Merrill, her eluvian, and Clan Sabrae?
What happened to Bartrand?
What happened to Anders when the Chantry exploded?
Did Hawke approve of Ander’s actions?
Did Aveline marry Donnic?
The Tale of the Champion
Did Hawke protect the Bone Pit from all its dangers?
What happened to Feynriel?
Did Hawke let Zevran go?
Did Nathaniel survive?
Did Hawke side with the mages or the templars?
Fewer choices are carrying over here compared to DAO, but many of the events that occurred in DA2 are only relevant to Kirkwall’s immediate fate, which is already resolved by the time of DAI. Many of these will be flavour again, but some of them, I’m not going to say which, will definitely have a bigger impact.
Right, we’re done with DA2, let’s move on to the last one!
Past Adventures: The Inquisition
And here we get to the big one, the game that most directly impacts much of DAV’s story. We click on the last page and get the green shades and DAI’s ambience themes, a beautiful reprisal of Trevor Morris’ great hits. I would like to once again reiterate how emotional the CC music made me feel here when I was playing the game. Let us now customise our choices.
The Inquisitor
While the Hero of Ferelden will be a background figure in letters and codex entries, and Hawke more of a minor character with a significant role, the Inquisitor will have a much larger presence. Just how large, you’ll find out soon. But for now, let’s customise them:
The Inquisitor: Here you can customise your Inquisitor’s race, gender, class, and specialisation. Their personality as well, for while it wasn’t as apparent as with Hawke, the Inquisitor does still have a distinct range of dialogue choices. You can still be diplomatic, lighthearted, or even rough.
Who did the Inquisitor romance, if at all?
The Inner Circle
As with the other companion sections, pretty much all slides here will feature the “Did you actually recruit them?”, “Are they still around?”, and “Are you friends or not?” questions. Alongside a few specific ones that will definitely have more of an impact here.
Did Dorian resolve the issue with his father?
What happened to Blackwall?
Did the Iron Bull remain loyal to the Qun?
Did Cassandra rebuild the Seekers of Truth?
Did Cassandra discover the book of secrets and what did she do with it?
What happened to Harmond?
Which path did Cole choose?
What happened to Solas’ friend?
Did Varric track down the red lyrium source?
Did the Inquisitor give Vivienne the heart of a snow wyvern?
How was Cullen’s lyrium dilemma resolved?
How did the Inquisitor help Josephine resolve her family’s fortunes?
Was Leliana hardened or softened?
The Path of the Inquisitor
Did the Inquisitor embrace or denounce their title of Herald of Andraste?
Did the Inquisition side with the mages or the templars?
What was the general principle upon which the Inquisition was founded?
Who rules Orlais?
Who stayed behind in the Fade?
What happened to the Grey Wardens after Adamant Fortress?
What happened to Samson or Calpernia?
Who drank from the Well of Sorrows?
Did the Inquisitor respect the rituals at the Temple of Mythal?
Who became Divine Victoria?
The Inquisition’s Influence
Did the Inquisitor ally with the Hinterland cultists?
Was the rift in Crestwood closed?
Was Caer Bronach captured?
Did the Inquisitor make a deal with Imshael?
Was Suledin Keep captured?
Was Griffon Wing Keep captured?
Was Sutherland’s company formed?
What tone did the Inquisitor’s judgments take?
Jaws of Hakkon
Did the Inquisitor learn Ameridan’s fate?
Was Hakkon slain?
Did the Inquisitor share the truth about Ameridan?
The Descent
Did the Inquisitor stop the earthquakes from destroying the Deep Roads?
Trespasser
What is the ultimate fate of the Inquisition?
What is the Inquisitor’s final goal regarding Solas?
Again, this looks like a lot, and it is, but bear in mind that a lot of these will only have minor impacts on the story in the form of cameos and codex entries. However, there are several major DAI choices that will have significant impact.
For our hypothetical rewrite, I shall not list every single choice I made for my imaginary playthrough. Instead, I shall reveal them as we go along so as not to clutter the space too much. And it’s a bit more fun this way.
And that’s the World State editor finally done! I believe all of these choices are able to feature in some capacity, be it big or small. But no matter if it’s a big world-changing consequence or simple flavour texts and cameos, it will still be our Thedas, our own unique version of it that we helped shape.
Now that the past is dealt with, let’s look at the present. Next time we’ll talk about Rook, the six factions, and why a DAO-style origin story selection would have not only been beneficial but very doable.
#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#veilguard spoilers#dav#rewrite#rewritingveilguard#veilguard critical#dragon age origins#dragon age 2#dragon age inquisition#world states#character creation
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"Low quality" is entirely subjective. It's totally understandable and expected that players won't all enjoy every facet of the game equally. You might think that certain content is "low quality" but other players will absolutely love it. I've personally seen plenty of people complaining about how much they hate WW and FabSnap, but I've also seen just as many people gushing about how much they love those features. This isn't ever going to be a good metric to use when discussing game development because literally every player will have different tastes and opinions. Not discrediting your feelings about it, just saying that it's not an objective measure.
As for the point about dating characters in a dating game - this is an issue that probably could have been mitigated somewhat by giving the new feature a different name. If they had called it "Private Moments" or "Private Time" with your favourite character, that might have helped. I've seen plenty of people making this point, and while I understand where you're coming from, it's still just a bonus feature. It's optional, it's not mandatory for progressing in the main game, you're not obligated to buy it. There's still romantic moments in the Main Story, and in Pop Quiz events, and in Devilgrams. There's still kisses and romance with the characters in the rest of the game. Believe me, I would love if they leaned harder into the romance aspect. It's one of the things I've personally told them myself, both in Player Feedback Surveys and when talking to the staff face-to-face. But the idea that they're locking the romance and dating behind a paywall is simply false. They aren't removing romance from the main game, it's still there.
As for Lucifer and Mammon being the first two characters available...you don't think that has anything to do with them literally being #1 and #2 in the character lineup? They tend to release these things in order, which means Lucifer first, then the rest of the brothers, then Diavolo and Barbatos, etc. Just like the release schedule for the Character Songs. And multiple sets of merch. And so on, and so forth. If they're doing it in batches of two, then we can expect Levi and Satan to come next (or perhaps Levi, Satan, and Asmo will be released together, then Beel and Belphie as a pair, etc) like they're literally just going through the characters in order. The fact that Lucifer and Mammon are also the most popular is coincidental.
Anyway.
Yes, they can definitely improve this feature by adjusting the price or providing more options. Yes, people's grievances are valid and no one is telling you that you're not allowed to be disappointed. Yes, I would also love it if they leaned harder into the romance in all aspects of the game. But at the end of the day, it's a completely optional bonus feature. It doesn't impact the gameplay and it's not required for story progression. It's just a fun little side thing that you can get if you want to get it. And if you don't want to, you don't have to. It's all good.
Here's the link to Solmare's contact page, where players can email the Support Team directly. I encourage you guys to actually email them and let them know your thoughts. Because the concerns about prices ARE valid. The desire to see more romantic elements in the game is valid! I'm in complete agreement with you there! And telling Solmare directly is the best way to make your feedback heard.
Going to play Devil's Advocate (ha) here for a moment, as someone who has experience working in the industry & game development:
Remember, every single time that any new feature is added to the game (even if that new feature is "just a new artwork and phone call") it means that Solmare is -
Paying artists for the new artwork
Paying writers for the new scripts
Paying the voice actors to record the new voice lines
Paying the game devs, coders, debuggers, etc, to actually implement the new feature into the game without breaking anything
Paying for QA
Paying the translators for all the different language versions (Obey Me is currently available in 4 different languages)
Paying the localisers for all different language versions
Etc, etc
This is all on top of the monthly costs of keeping a live service mobage like OM running smoothly. Anything that isn't paid for by the players is being operated at a loss. This isn't a flaw with OM itself, this is a fact that exists on an industry-wide level.
Secondly, while any concerns about the price are entirely valid, I think that a lot of people are glossing over an important point - Solmare is not charging you $30 for a Date Ticket. Solmare is charging $30 for a BUNDLE, which includes the Date Ticket as well as 300 DP. So this is similar to all the other sales bundles that have been rolled out in the past.
And the price is consistent with the standard price for DP in Akuzon. It has always been about $30 for 300 DP, so the price has not actually changed or been increased. This is an optional, $30 bundle for 300 DP that essentially includes the Date Ticket as a bonus for free.
You're totally justified if you don't want to spend $30 on this. I'm definitely not arguing that. While I think that this feature isn't as bad as some people are saying (I never would have expected any new features to be totally free) I do think that Solmare could have rolled this out in a better way than they did.
I think that most, if not all, of the complaints would disappear if they simply offered different bundles for different price tiers. This is something they've already done in the past, even! Just give people alternatives, like...
$1.39 for the Date Ticket by itself
$10 for 100 DP + Date Ticket
$20 for 200 DP + Date Ticket
$30 for 300 DP + Date Ticket
And so on. I think this probably would have alleviated many people's concerns, and would have made the new feature more accessible for more players.
Now, I don't think that harassing the official Twitter account is the way to go about communicating your thoughts. There's a difference between genuine constructive criticism/feedback given in good faith, and needlessly rude hate comments. "Fuck you, hope your game goes broke" doesn't help anybody, and will only make Solmare less likely to listen to the EN fandom. They've dealt with a lot of harassment from Western fans before, including death threats, and you aren't communicating anything useful or constructive by sending hate to the EN social media account.
Solmare has a Support team that you can email, if you have feedback and you actually want to reach the JP game devs. If you want to let them know that you want other/more affordable options for the new Date Ticket feature, this is the best way to do that. Just remember to be civil, since harassment and hate mail are extremely likely to simply be thrown out before it reaches the hands of anyone in charge.
#saying all this with respect!#i do agree with a lot of your points#price adjustments (or just more options for cheaper bundles) would be a huge improvement!#we DO need more romance in the game#the romance isn't being removed or paywalled by the addition of the Date Tickets! but it would be great if we got more romance in general!#like pump up the romance throughout the ENTIRE game! yes!
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OC Fact #62
Happy mermay! Let's talk about my lil' guy!
Affectionately called Guppy (a nickname from @corrupted-tale that just stuck since I can't come up with names lmaoo), he's a little ghost mermaid that accompanies Myrie :)
He's based off a lamprey, and therefore is a parasite! Unfortunately, his body wasn't found by other mermaid communities, so his soul couldn't be released, so he lives as a ghost. In order to thrive, he feasts off happiness.
Cut to Myrie, the angstiest teen ever, maybe.
Guppy is able to cause strong visions that make people feel happy, and then he feeds off that. That's what he did with Myrie for so long.
He's just a lil' guy :) lil' baby boy little kid did nothing wrong in his life little meow meow
#oc#oc fun fact#sona: Myrie#oc: Guppy#don't have a name for this specific world lol#fun to develop! but I don't have many ideas#the og idea for guppy was a lot different but I like him more :)#artbabble-tm
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this tree from my new drawing looking goated afffffff 👑👑
#yes this is a nel/vas drawing get off me😂#text#i wanted everyone to see it but also since i draw on paper in total silence i think a lot about everything so i wanted to voice some -#- thoughts too's. tbh i've been veeery self indulgent lately#actually i'm happy that n*lv*s is getting actual hits out of me that i like looking at#especially on-paper stuff that i can recall being fun for me to draw. all traditional art is fun to draw#and digital has turned into an actual task for me (only sometimes tho maybe i;m lying.. mspaint we're still bffs)#i think i just don't see the joy in trying to scrap up a ''' finished ''' piece in an art program .. pencil i love you and i love the -#- feeling of it scratching along the paper....sigh............ Rabu#i don't want my blog or thoughts to turn into traditional art suck-off ventures bc ik not everyone can get into it for many possible -#- reasons but if u feel like it U can ok? do it for Pencil✏️ and for me? for silusvesuius? 𝖎 𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖑 𝖕𝖗𝖔𝖙𝖊𝖈𝖙 𝖞𝖔𝖚#but Lord i hope i don't also come off as one of those people that r like 'to improve in art just draw that one fictional character u -#- rly like 😂😂' bruh gtfo my face with that.#i'm noticing 'improvement' in my stuff mainly...i think... because i'm always striving to impress#not so much other people that are here just for my art but more so myself#i have a very huge ego (Mind Battle)#also it makes me sad to think about how big egos or genuine (not obnoxious) flauntiness are looked down on#and i can tell bc i used to look down on people that would express the things i'm expressing now#especially in art focused spaces. now i'd rather be in a circle of artists that love to J*rk off their own brain for it's ideas -#-and talent than be w/ very self-conscious artists that are never expressing pride about any of their work#worse if it's to the point where they actively start to fish for compliments bc of it#fishing for compliments is always OK i just wish it didn't stem from insecurity in that context if that makes sense#but maybe that's very easy for me to say and admit bc i did develop a very big ego around my art and ... Creativity? like it's a sims skill#not that i still don't seek out 'attention' or compliments from others to soothe myself but hmmmmmm i hope u feel me.#it just turns me into a very competitive person#who am i competing with? Myself#i'm always in 'you can do better Because you're YOU' mode#which is much better i believe than comparing yourself 2 other artists#i don't think a lot of people read my tag ramblings but if u do i wonder how one feels about a very pompous artist#like me .......(?)
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the CEO of NIANTIC liked my art on twitter?!?!?!?! 🫠 I am passing away 👻
#auropost#also i erased one of those ugly as shit ape nfts in the icons#no one needs to see that#ANYWAYS UH#THIS IS GETTING A LITTLE.......... REAL.........#i had the realization earlier that i'm pretty sure mark fucking zuckerberg has walked around inside of my artwork#because figmin xr was part of the world press tour of the launch of the latest meta headset#and he was like. there. yknow#and it's slowly dawning on me how batshit insane my trajectory as an artist has been over the past year#like this is sooooooooo not normal. i didn't go to college and i had zero industry experience#for many intents and purposes i don't know shit lmao#and yet?!?!? i am considered an expert in this field?#i literally just got off a call with a developer asking me to help with their vr art app#and i'm going to soon be hosting regular xr art workshops in LA#and as someone who has social anxiety i have literally no idea how i'm doing any of this#i just really love art and i really love helping people make art#and somehow that overrides the anxious part of my brain i guess?!?#I DUNNO!!!!! i'm just playing around and having fun!!!!!#anyways if you've read this far thanks for sticking with me on this journey#i know it's been a huge pivot from celestial prints to Futuristic Hologram Art#but i appreciate everyone who has been curious enough to stick around and see where this leads
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2024 Fic Masterpost - Voltron
Realizing I used to have a nice clean Tumblr page for this, but I figured I should have SOMETHING to put all my recent fics together somewhere!
In case this breaches containment, I write hurt/comfort pretty exclusively, and most of my works have minor TWs. I'm a Keith stan at heart, but I've been trying to branch out on how much I involve other characters.
Short Chapter Fics:
5 Times Lance Doesn't Matter +1 Time He Finally Does
15k - complete
Lance-centric with a strong focus on Keith later
mid-canon to post-canon timeline & canon plausible
gen platonic paladins & Lance; implied pre-Klance
TW for short-term alcohol abuse & emeto
14k for the main story, +1k at the end as an optional bonus chapter (how I was originally going to write the fic before it turned into a 5+1)
Smiling 'cause you're used to it (a house that's always haunted)
12k - complete
Keith-centric
pre-Kerberos & canon plausible
Broganes
lots of TWs! emeto, implied child abuse, implied off-screen alcohol abuse by an OC, description of injury, implied bullying, implied self-harm, implied eating disorder
chapter 4 has art!
Chemicals, chemicals in my brain (where'd you go, where'd you go anyway?)
7k - reads as complete, but may get one more chapter
Keith-centric
early canon & canon plausible-ish
Broganes & implied pre-Klance
TW for forced drug use & emeto
5 Times Keith Relies on the Blade +1 Time...
10k - 5/6 chapters published
Keith-centric
mid-canon, during Keith's time as a Blade
mostly Keith & Blades, some Keith & paladins
TW for injury, but it's not super detailed
intended to follow On it, yes, indeed (on it, watch me bleed) but like... I'm not gonna stop you from reading it on its own
Oneshots:
On it, yes, indeed (on it, watch me bleed)
2.5k - complete
Keith-centric
mid-canon, just before Keith joins the BOM full-time & canon-plausible
gen with some implied Kuron fuckery
TW for injury, not very detailed
art in progress for this one!
Ficlets:
Nowhere to call home (so I'll pack and run away)
5k - complete ficlet collection (though it's the basis for a longer fic I'm working on, so you'll see more in the future if you want to)
Keith-centric
pre-canon, post-Kerberos launch, up to you whether you consider it canon plausible because I took some liberties (but it converges back to canon episode 1 by the end)
gen (it's Keith alone in the desert; kind of hard to explore relationships in isolation)
the most TWs I've ever put into one work, so don't feel like you HAVE to read this fic! it's not for everyone; it's mainly for me. recreational drug use, vehicular accident, basic description of injuries, my personal experiences with poverty (which may not match up with yours and that's okay), starvation, emeto, mentioned animal death, slight suicidal ideation
it has a playlist linked in the first author's note!
art is also in progress
What are you wondering? (What do you know?)
<1k - may get a second chapter, but reads as a complete ficlet now
Shiro-centric
pre-canon, post Galra capture, & canon plausible
gen
TW for body horror and human experimentation maybe? it's not super detailed
#my writing#i am in SHOCK that i only wrote one true oneshot this year#i know if you just joined in for my voltron phase you didn't see the way i wrote for my last fandom but#to summarize that shit was near 100% oneshots#and now i write short chapter fics#character development baby#(i like the chapter fic writing process a lot more)#and i swear i don't normally write so many ficlets but it's just something about this year#i've been really into using them to explore an idea real quick without having to go too in-depth#i know a lot of people don't like reading fics that short#but i have fun writing them so it's okay#i'll read 'em myself and you guys can just scroll past those ones if you want
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you ever think about how vegas and kinn’s (and tankhun’s) age differences play into their rivalry, esp during their formative years? i am obsessed with/heartbroken by the notion of vegas being born essentially for the purpose of competing with his 4-6 years older cousins and no one acknowledging the inherent developmental disadvantage because, well, he is gun’s heir.
I DOOOO think about this! I'm so obsessed w/ trying to figure out what their age difference actually is, and how old Tankhun was when he was traumatized out of his role and Kinn took over, because I think a lotttt about Vegas being taught to hate and undermine Tankhun (and how clumsy he probably was when he was young, and how that impacted the overt cartoonish ire between Tankhun and Vegas-Macau), and looking up to his cool, and possibly even NICE!!!, older cousin Kinn before he was taught to view him as a threat. But yeah! As soon as Kinn becomes the heir!! Suddenly Vegas goes from encouraged to undermine his much older cousin, to expected to clone and displace his old-enough-to-have-skills-and-capabilities-Vegas-lacks, but-not-so-old-it's-patently-insane-for-his-dad-to-act-like-Vegas-should-somehow-overcompensate-for-all-of-those things, cousin. What a ridiculous situation... Gun acts like he's a failure for his natural developmental disadvantage, and Kinn/Tankhun/the main family act like it's a hard-earned win for Kinn every time Vegas fails because of expected age gap foibles, and I would headcanon that any of the wins he does get are not because he successfully overtakes Kinn in strength or intelligence before he's at least 20 or so, but probably through sneakiness or cruelty or both, so he internalizes early that those are his special talents, but talents that get him treated with pathologized disgust/disdain/resentment by his entire family...
:)
#kinnvegas#asks#again it's not about meowmeowing vegas! he does many very bad things#that would certainly make me or anyone who isn't pete treat him with great suspicion/fear/horror#but it's fun to lean into the ways :) he suffers :) delicious for me personally :)#kpts#also don't come for me about the 'at least 20 or so' lmao i have no sense of when bodies develop my late teens to early 20s were a haze#BUT YOU GET THE IDEA he's internalized his special talents before he can realistically outrun or outsmart his cousin
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thinking so many thoughts abt iris fresh out of the vault so scared, confused, vulnerable, alone, grief about to hit in full force, and still malleable, just for poppy to be the first person to find her and she has iris wrapped around her finger for a while
#thinking lots of gut-wrenching thoughts to make miss ma'ams mental state even worse this early in her story#also to help solidify some details for funsies + actually develop the poppyiris dynamic and the complexities that come with it#was even thinking abt them both being the ones to give the other their face scars#plus I can have fun with iris's design bc I decided her fresh out the vault look is one of her older iterations from way back when–#and her current look is after she meets and becomes closer with nicky and he cuts her hair for her :]#I love rambling abt iris bc I just /don't/ talk abt her in depth beyond a select few close friends lmao so like iykyk I guess#I just have SO many new ideas since thinking up poppy being iris's first companion bc it just hurts so fucking good#also random nonsense that only I care abt:#a few weeks ago went bananas over imaging them playing co-op vampire survivors bc likeeee#the implications of iris picking luminaire foscari and poppy picking genevieve gruyere..#oooo ooouuuoughoughhhgggggoougggh#rambling#miss ma'am iris is that you#poppy
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tears of the kingdom could have been so good if it were built around like, its story or its characters instead of being a clunky shell to show off the mechanic no one asked for that it forces you to use
#*#text#totk#mechanics#i had fun scuttling around in the depths for a while but that got old eventually. for obvious reasons#what i liked about zelda games was always the atmosphere and character interactions#like. one of my favorite games is twilight princess. which is. deeply unserious in many ways#bit it COMMITTED to its setting and what the writers went ham making sure#that it was still full of whimsy and affection.#totk doesn't have that. the characters are all 1) instruction manuals or 2) vehicles for what small and disparate semblances of plot#survived whatever disaster must have happened in development that made them cannibalize several different ideas#and stick them into the shell for the fucking. arm#totk plays like a gallery or again just an engine for the building thing.#it's pretty. the music is good. the building thing is well made. but as a zelda game totk Fucking Tanks#i HATE overinvolved mechanics. i HATE having to stop and rely on a Whole Process that i have to keep stocked#to get anything done. i've always liked loz again bc of characters and whimsy but also bc it's always been mechanically vert streamlined#and accessible to someone like me who is disabled and finds fiddling EXTREMELY tedious#you have one required tool per dungeon and they're QUICK they're SIMPLE they're A GOOD TIME#totk. to me. is just clunky and has no redeeming qualities outside of again being pretty and still sort of nominally letting you run around#collecting things. some of the side quests were cute. but even then the characters were very.#THE THING ABOUT ZELDA GAMES IS THAT IM used TO THEM BEING ABOUT. NOT JUST THE FUNCTION!!!!!!#there were things— many of them! sometimes most of them even!!!— there just for fun. again almost especially The Characters#totk is so goddamn UTILITARIAN on all levels ITS. CLUNKY and BORING i don't WANT to have to do 30 things just so i can do something else.#hey nintendo. if you have to force people to play your game. like if you specifically have an ''open'' game and then subsequently have to#manufacturer MANY blocks and caveats to the idea of ''do whatever have fun!!'' so that it's''but only how WE want you to''. maybe thats bad.#maybe you've done a bad job. if again. you have to FORCE players to go about things in the way and order that you want. it's no fun.#like even zelda games where you have less options and linear progression feel less restrictive bc like. they don't fucking punish you.#for. playing the game. you just can't do things. totk really punishes you for going off script. which like. why even do that.#anyway. this is all probably incoherent. i'm right tho.#wow there are so many typos. pretend there are not <3
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Except they're not all wrong and they're not "paid fanfiction." They were written with Lucas' approval and they developed the Star Wars universe in a dry spell that lasted years. The only reason they're claimed to be "not canon" now is only because of the decision Disney made ... and that was after it passed out of Lucas' hands. He never claimed any such thing. So as far as Lucas is concerned, they're as canon as anything else.
And it's true that at the same time there are story points that conflict. All that means is that you get to explore how they might or might not still fit with other pieces of the universe, such as the movies, and which pieces you think make more sense.
There is no hard core "this is wrong" statement that you can apply to published material. The EU books are just as valid as anything else. The Star Wars universe is NOT just the movies, whether anyone likes it or not. It's a bad faith move to blockade off totally valid discussion points just because you want to gatekeep the fandom. The books exist, people read them and like them, and they get to talk about them, and no one is capable of undermining that. You don't get to invalidate real SW resources just because you don't like the conclusions some people make from them.
At the point that you want to keep your headcanons informed only by the movies, that is certainly a choice you can make. But in the wider fandom, people can and do use all the material available to them. And they will have different opinions. You don't have to like them, but there's also nothing you can do to wipe them out or to somehow magically trump them because you like your resources better than theirs.
If you don't want to see those points come up in discussions then don't have those discussions. Or frame the discussion properly up front, and it can be a fun little exercise to only consider the movies.
This is just how fandom works.
I really dislike it when anti-Jedi and Jedi-critical crowd uses EU books as a prove for their points. Why they’re all wrong:
a) The books were written by various people who didn’t consult George Lucas about what they’re going to write. Everyone understood SW as they did. When an original author has never claimed such art as canon and actually refused it – this is a definition of fanfiction, isn’t it? Paid, yes, but fanfiction nonetheless.
b) Most of these books were created way before PT. They didn’t know about the Jedi things what we know now. It becomes quite hypocritical – I mean, in the EU the clones were enemies, not allies, but somehow I don’t see any claims ‘but the clones are enemies! The EU says so!’. Even in Karen Traviss books not all the clones have a personality, but we all ignore it now, aren’t we? She wrote her books before the TCW, not knowing how the series would spin the story. So EU retcon works for the clones, but not for the Jedi?
#I'm pro Jedi as much as anybody but i absolutely recognize the toxic nature of gatekeeping totally valid SW resources#there's no such thing as saying 'your positions don't matter because i don't believe in your sources'#the sources are published material. full stop. they're valid#you HAVE to do better than that to make a legitimate argument#if you don't know enough to refute the EU you can just say so#or if those discussions aren't fun for you to explore then don't explore them#nothing you can do can invalidate those sources or get rid of those positions#so you can either treat them respectfully or stay out of those fandom corners#personally i find it weird and boring to not entertain different points of view. they're all fun and they lend themselves to cool new#stories and rp and fanfic#the movies aren't great themselves btw. EU did SO many things better. (like the original clone concept)#but I'm not out there crying about the clones because i prefer the EU. i recognize that SW material is SW material#if people want to use it to headcanon all these noncanon clone representations then that's fine#likewise there's room to develop positions on the Jedi that are both supported and different from each other#and that's great actually#i don't care about the positions themselves so much as the wrong-headed idea of invalidating arguments because of personal beef with#with totally valid sources#commentary#Star Wars#also like. as mere fans your opinion simply doesn't trump real published authors. you don't have the authority or position to say published#work is 'wrong'. you can choose not to use it in your personal playground but that's all the power you get.#ordering people to not use the EU is not a thoughtful or well-developed position
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still haven't properly Drawn my lorule map yet but oooh the ideas........
#libra.txt#it's almost a vertical mirror to hyrule#but not quite. ugh idk#they aren't 1:1 mirrors anymore#anyway i'm thinking about making a chain of volcanic islands#but idk......#sigh. i don't think it work quite right#like how is hilda going to get there?#but maybe i'll have it as one major volcano still on the continent#and then a ring of islands leading up toward zora's domain#nothing is going to line up right anymore#like yes i suppose things are moving so that my gerudo alts are in swampland generally in the same area as the faron region#which is arguably swampish#and death mountain is still in the same place. it's just that it's snowy now#(which is of course canon to albw)#i originally wanted to have the [redacted] area similar to some of the tabantha region#the dry areas and the cliffs and canyons#and some of the northern gerudo region area#like where the yiga cave is in totk#but more of an interconnected cave / tunnel system#kinda like what little i remember of minish cap#but so many worldbuilding ideas.........#like i thought the islands could be fun bc i could also allude to a pirate history on the high seas#since i am Not going to write a ww lorule fic any time soon#(the sws lorule fic is the only loz alt i'm going to allow myself to do besides the botw fic rn)#(and that's only bc unfortunately it will help me develop lore for the botw fic. and also maybe help me work on a ghirahim voice)#(why's ghirahim here? don't worry about it)
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even 2 years ago people still said autism with a whisper. it was also how people sometimes whisper lesbian, like they're afraid of uttering a slur. autistic was either an insult or it was something terrible, a horrible burden only select people endure. "select people" were usually 9 year old boys and skinny white men.
they are not hispanic young adults with a dog and a life and friends. i can make (sustained, calculated, painful) eye contact. with certain people, i don't even have to count how many seconds i am holding their vision - i can just look at them. i can wear clothes that bother me, i will just have a worse day than usual. i might cry about any changes to my schedule - but change is scary! this is normal!
when i was 16 it was OCD. i mean that was the thing everyone said. i totally have ocd. they would arrange 6 colors of gel pen in rainbow order (no worry for indigo feeling left out) and they'd be "so ocd" about it.
if you struggle with intrusive thoughts, be careful at this next paragraph, but. at 16 i developed a compulsion that involved self-harm. my ocd was convinced i was simply forgetting that i'd hurt someone terribly - a thought that persisted for no clear or delineated reason.
at some point i will probably write about how the idea of "morally pure thoughts" was hell for me and others with ocd, but this was the odd dichotomy for many of us: they liked our "aesthetic", but were genuinely repulsed by our lived experience. "intrusive thoughts" now means "cutting your hair in the sink" instead of talking yourself down from believing horrible things. "so ocd" is a label without any true understanding.
it's something i've talked about before - in multiplicity - but i firmly believe in the veracity and necessity of self-diagnosis. i think it saves lives and it saves tragedies from occurring. as someone raised in a house that wasn't safe, self-diagnosis was, for many years, the only viable option. 15 and honestly googling: am i depressed or are there demons affecting my behavior.
but it is not genuine self-diagnosis anymore, most of the time. it is a strange, blanched version of that whispered word autism. now certain traits are constantly seen as "autistic" - any passing intense interest. any flubbed social interaction. people say it while laughing - a touch of the 'tism.
and i like the acceptance! i do. i like that people are talking about it. i like that if i self-identify, more people speak up and say me too, bitch. but there is something-else quietly happening, the way it happened to OCD. the quirky, "fun" parts have been washed and sanitized and removed of all suffering. now it is just something that makes you "a little bit silly."
it took me 27 years on this planet before i learned to make friends. something about me just seems incredibly odd, i guess, some kind of radiation monitoring. someone once (in a way that was almost friendly) told me i am doing the right things, but in a way that's off-putting. i have scoured myself raw attempting to be charming.
someone on tiktok does a deep dive into their particular passion. the top comment says "what kind of autism is this lol". like we are a breed of animal. like it has no influence on our experience. like our life is a fresh breeze, an open meadow.
more often for me, life was a drowning.
#warm up#spilled ink#writeblr#it's hard to explain bc i do like the acceptance but it's like the ocd thing#autism is . an entire neurotype. yes we get 'cool autism powers' but we mostly say that#for OUR sake. on the autism website.#the cool autism powers do come with like. quality of life problems.#girl being in a room with LEDs gives me a headache. so you can kind of imagine how that might#in some way#influence my ability to function#will defend self diagnosis to the death as long as it is CLEAR AND LEGITIMATE. not like.#oooo i struggle talking 2 women i must be autistic#girl what. i struggle with the act of TALKING.
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on worldbuilding, and what people think is going on
there is one facet of fantasy worldbuilding that is, to me, the most interesting and essential but i don't see it come up in worldbuilding guides or writing prompts or anything, and that is the question of:
what do the inhabitants of your world believe about how the world works, and how are they wrong? a lot of fantasy media will set up their cosmology, gods, magic systems, planar systems, concepts of the afterlife, &c., and proceed as though the inhabitants of the world know and understand them.
from someone whose entire academic career is focused on studying human culture in various regions and time periods, with a focus on belief systems (religion, occultism, mythology, folklore): that sort of worldbuilding is unrealistic and missing out on so much fun.
people are always seeking new understanding about how the world works, and they are mostly wrong. how many models of the solar system were proposed before we reached our current one? look at the long, turbulent history of medicine and our various bizarre models for understanding the human body and how to fix it. so many religions and occult/magical traditions arise from people disagreeing with or adapting various models of the world based on new ideas, methods, technologies. many of them are wrong, but all of them are interesting and reflect a lot about the culture, beliefs, values, and fears of the people creating/practising them.
there is so much more to the story of what people believe about the world than just what is true.
to be clear: i think it's fine and important for the author to have a coherent explanation for where magic comes from or who the gods are, so they can maintain consistency in their story. but they should also be asking what people in the world (especially different people, in different regions/nations and different times) think is happening when they do magic, or say a prayer, or practise medicine, or grieve their dead. it is a rich vein for conflict between individuals and nations alike when two models of the world disagree. it is fascinating how different magic systems might develop according to different underlying beliefs.
personally, i think it is the most fun to spawn many diverse models of the world, but give none of them the 'right' answer.
(bonus points if you also have a thriving academic system in the world with its own theory, research, and discourse between factions! as an academic, it is very fun to imagine fictional academic debate over the topics i'm worldbuilding. sometimes i will be working out details for some underlying mechanic of the world and start imagining the papers being written by scholars researching it)
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The Great Goodreads Diss List (Part 1)
Context: For many years now, I have been collecting funny lines from Goodreads reviews to share with my coworkers. (I do collection development, reader's advisory, and weeding at a public library, so I read a LOT of reviews)
Are some of these, perhaps, rather mean? Yes, but they are also very funny, and come from a place of honest frustration. In the tradition of Bargepole threads and lists everywhere, names and titles have been censored.
"First, I want to say that I understand how hard it is to write a book and how amazing it is when it is actually published. Congrats to the author for that accomplishment. That said--"
"Warning: This review will be lengthy due to pure hatred."
"I found myself feeling really, really annoyed with the world that this book is allowed to exist. We live in a universe where the passenger pigeon is extinct but this book goes along merrily being read by unsuspecting lovers of words and ideas and stories? It just seems like too much, you know?"
"Don't do it. Don't spring the cash for the hardcover. Instead, eat an entire bag of Twizzlers, spend some money you don't have at a high-end department store, look up on Facebook the shady college boyfriend that made you cry, research the current value of your home or 401K and then read all about how the big hedge fund managers are faring during the economic crisis. You'll feel about the same stomach pain if you waste your time reading this book."
"This wretched novel begins with the mugging of an old lady and it appears I may be in the process of repeating that loathsome crime as [author] was 78 when she wrote it. It is not nice to put the boot into such a poor defenseless old creature lying there with only a damehood, a Booker Prize and a few million quid. It’s a nasty job but somebody has to do it."
"I think this is the way dead people would write, if they could."
"I am considering setting up SPABB: Society for the Protection of Accurate Book Blurb. This blurb appears to have been written by someone from the publishers who met [the author] the night before, got very drunk, lost his notes and then constructed something in a fug of hangover the next morning."
"I congratulate [the author] on the early half of his book, which was thoroughly fun and made me laugh and think. I congratulate [the author] on the second half of his book, for finishing it. It reads like that was difficult."
"…a woman whose taste in contemporary literature has roughly the same batting average as a pitcher in the National League."
"The author is a pompous windbag."
"Recommends it for: No one. Recommended to me by: A friend who apparently wished to cause me great suffering."
"Makes me wonder: is it possible to obtain similes at a volume discount?"
"The repeated phrases made me want to mail a thesaurus to the author."
"I'm disappointed in myself for finishing this book."
"if the author described [character's] eyes as "obsidian" one more time I was tempted to write her and ask if her thesaurus broke."
"They say that an infinite number of monkeys with an infinite number of typewriters would, if given infinite time, eventually produce the complete works of William Shakespeare. [This book], on the other hand, would probably take the average monkey just under two hours."
"I can't imagine what the author had to do to get this nadir of Western literature printed on innocent trees, but he does seem to know a LOT about being well-connected in New York."
"This book is so bad it is almost worth reading just to make you appreciate the other books you are reading."
"Reads like it was written by a brilliant author, the night before it was due."
"raises interesting questions, like: can a book be so bad as to constitute an act of terrorism"
"has this author ever spoken to a human woman"
"This acorn has fallen so far from the tree that it can’t even see the forest."
"I’m guessing they are touted as ‘beach reads’ because no one will care if they get dropped into the ocean."
"This book begins with all the energy of a hand vacuum near the end of its battery life, and the pace doesn't quicken much from there."
"At least everybody’s eyes stayed the same color this time around.”
Part 2
Part 3
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i legit love when a character's gender is so integral to their personality (and perception obviously.) like so concrete that if genderbent their whole shtick would just be absolute dookie. anyways i'm just writing this text so i can talk in the tags (My beautiful safe haven)
youtube
this 14 minute song is soooooooooooo FYRE
#text#actually i'm thinkinbg about this only cus i'm drawing female neloff and i'm just like#Elder dookies fans already hate females..... imagine them tryign to handle a woman with NPD that is reaching toxic waste levels#old decaying female with NPD.#but i'm also drawing female neloff for fun cus i have an idea for a look; i don't think it's a good idea#and he is just one of those characters that feel very good in the strict cismale box.#i also feel silly talking about gender-anything in any fiction because that's a topic only Am*ricans with no real problems sweat about#if that makes sense#just not something that interests me in the slightest#actually this might jsut be fascinating 2me because it is interesting indeed to see the different ways narcissism is treated. in characters#if i keep saying females instead of women it's bc i legit love that word. Sorry#and el*nwen+ulfr*c too are those female+male respectively perfectly fitting characters too#but notice how i didn't say cis. exactly. i'm thinking about the person that said elly did his top surgery in the torture basement. 4 free#or maybe i said that and they jsut said they're both t4t. Mmmaybe#the absolute W we copped with elly being the ' ' Big Bad ' ' th*lmor as a woman who is just obsessed with the luxuries of life.#stereotypical high society woman#she's so cute#i might just be obsessed with exploring very traditional dynamics too. i love keeping it grounded yk#Me after reading too many geriatric centuries old novels and huffing copium on sk*rim#i think i legit hate having fun with wilder character personality-morphism (because it is useless) that's not working with what u have#i'm just saying things that will make sense only 2 me now. Bye#why did i develop interest-related nihilism that extends to me hating fantasy franchises and anything that isn't non-fiction#i love it tho makes me feel so sophisticated#this is what happens when nobody humbles you while you draw regurgitated glorified studentXteacher (with a medieval twist) for a year.#i'm so excited for the year to be over not bc it's bad for me but bc i wanna see what all of the n*lvas art i drew looks like together#i wanna compile it like i did with eltl in 2023#n*lvas been treating me so well though liek i've been at such an artistic Peak especially after may#i'm always at my artistic peak tho.#i have a picture of n*relion on my mspaint canvas and it keeps looking at me while i'm drawing . he scares me because who gave him -#- the t*lvas hairstyle and the n*loth beard Bro.
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How would Fan react when learning about the reveal? Read my fun long ramble!
I need to put this down somewhere. Here is my fun not so structured analysis!!!! this is something i think a lot about. of course I do.
I doodled a small little graph of reactions I think he would go through that I will elaborate on further in the paragraphs below. I'm not sure about the order but it'd be something like these stages when processing it - most likely.
This is analyzed from the idea that Fan did not previously predict this in any way or expect it, but I do also suspect he might know! (Which, I'll explain later for his reaction to that.)
Fan's an incredibly emotional and impulsive person, he would definitely have a strong outer reaction to the information. This may be biased coming from me since Fan is my favorite to analyze but aside from Suitcase he would probably be handling it the worst after being told about it, OR just having the most notable reaction! This is considering he was not made to be a contestant but to devote his love, identity, and purpose to the show, which makes him revolve around the show much more than anyone else - since it is a built-in interest in him that he's dedicated his entire existence to, even when he tried to build himself beyond it- he still surrounds himself with Inanimate Insanity even after his elimination. It is forever tied to his mind and interests contrary to many contestants who try to separate from the show and competition entirely.
Fan's most substantial development in Hatching The Plan was the fact that there were many possibilities out there for him to discover for himself (and that others were there for him through that change and discovery). While he recognizes this and states on Fan's Fantastic Features that he's trying to test his limit and push past his comfort zone (notably while in a safe controlled environment where this change can occur comfortably for him) he is still "stuck" in Inanimate Insanity whether he recognizes this or not. He is at Hotel OJ, surrounded by the contestants, and he is still on MePhone4's island, like any other contestant. While Fan has convinced himself that he is more than just a fan of the show and that he is improving as a person, this development is still slow (obvious, coming from a person such as Fan who struggles with it) and he is still heavily attached to the core of his personality - the core which he was built to be in the first place. His love for the show is so clearly his own dedication and passion, and it truly does feel like his own CHOICE to love the show as much as he does. Even if he was created for it, it is a part of him that he loves and puts confidence into.
I swear these earlier points play into this bear with me,
So once Fan is told he was created by MePhone4, after the initial shock dies down, he would be in denial of it, of course, as Fan would react to any new information he had not considered about the show. Some "It can't be"s and some "There is absolutely no way"s being said by him, especially if he had not foreseen this coming. An instinctive reaction coming from Fan (which would also apply to Test Tube) is immediately questioning it, wanting answers- most definitely from MePhone4 himself. I don't think he'd believe Cobs if he told him, maybe not even Suitcase or Test Tube, he'd need to find the evidence for it and piece together if this even made sense at all.
Once he starts to consider it and all the pieces fit together for him as he looks back on everything, he'll let go of that denial. That's when it first really hits him. One of his first reactions is positive. He'd find validation in the fact he was created specifically for the show, he'd be honored and glad he was an actual piece of the show- not just a viewer or contestant, he was actually part of the show he loved so much. Fan puts a lot of his confidence into being the number 1 fan of inanimate insanity, as everyone knows, and being questioned on this or having people challenge him always strongly shows his insecurity over it. But knowing that he quite literally is, without a doubt, the biggest fan of inanimate insanity- and that he actually had this purpose and that he was made for what he loved to do- that would validate him immensely. He would thrive on his notion for a while until the existential crisis started to leap in.
He'd try to be acceptant of it, and this time around he would be in denial of his own emotions. He'd try to show how well he was taking this and to pride himself in being the biggest ii fan ever, so he puts up a confident front which is obviously not normal to anyone who sees him. He'd try his best not to think about the other implications of his existence being made for reality TV. He would try his best to appear in control and unburdened to prove to both others and himself that he was taking it well. I don't think this stage in his realization will go on for long. I think this would fluctuate a LOT depending on his mood.
At one point he does start to question himself. He overthinks his existence and his emotions, and if they are genuine- what if what he feels is fake? Just generated love? What if he truly doesn't like Inanimate Insanity? What's a real feeling from him and what's a fake one?! A million thoughts that some may not even make sense but this is where the existentialism really gets to him. Every time he felt excitement or love for the show, was that even his own emotions? Was that just made by MePhone4 so he could get some appreciation for his show- and maybe he'd get mad that MePhone4 kept dismissing him. Maybe he'd wonder why he was made if he's not being recognized and rewarded for how much dedication- if it was even his own- that he put into appreciating MePhone4, a dedication that was going unnoticed or deemed annoying by him.
Something I mentioned earlier, about Fan learning to embrace new opportunities for himself and about how he was still trapped in the show. He realizes he is forever tied to the show, and all his attempts at making changes for himself and being more than just a fan suddenly feel... meaningless to him. All he was ever made for from the start was to be a fanboy of the show, and he had tried to build himself around that. But those efforts were for nothing if this is all he ever was- just a fan. That was his entire identity, he was never anything other than that. This is all that could ever come out of him. So what was the point in trying? His shell might've been the only place he'd ever felt safe in anyways- and once he remembers it, his old coping mechanisms seem incredibly tempting. Fan would retreat back into his shell. Things just seemed so much simpler if he did, he wouldn't have to deal with all this overthinking if he just stuck to what he was made for, something he already had found so much comfort and significance in. He uses his shell to cope once again, regressing, turning back to his purpose. This would be how he copes with this new information, by embracing what it taught him that he was. He'd be in this state for a while, he'd probably try to pretend he never even learned anything and creating a false reality of his own security. Being a fan is still important to him, and something he feels so deeply about that he's urged into fully embracing it again. early season 2 fan is back babyyyy!
Not sure how long it would go on for, or even how long it would take for him to go through these stages, but this is somewhat of the process I believe he'd have! I think Suitcase and Fan should have a talk about dealing with all of this. possibly. I feel like it will boil down to "if it feels true to you, that's all that matters." for Fan dealing with this. I could definitely see Suitcase saying something similar to him.
As for him reacting to it after already having theorized this would happen or at the very least suspect it, I think it would go similar to that one drawing I made. He'd be proud at first, and it wouldn't sink in as fast because his pride comes first! But to have it actually confirmed to him would then send him into that same realization as stage 3 of processing it. Something something, it goes the same after this.
Anyways i love fannnn i could talk about him for hours boy i love you i wonder if we'll even get everyone's reactions to the reveal or if they'll even tell anyone else but if we do Fan would definitely have a prominent reaction to it <- guy who loves fan saying this. look at this bias
#ii#inanimate insanity#ii fan#pankie yap#ii spoilers#inanimate insanity spoilers#fan ii#pankie ramble
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