#fucking mustard nemesis

[damnprecious]

do you ever open the local newspaper and get greeted by the face of your nemesis

[thecherrygod]

man someone sent me how to crochet a capybara and like. i know how to read instructions. i dont do this stuff often enough to remember how to follow them

[ohanny]

okay, i am starting bed friend and since watching alone makes me stressed you are once again exposed to my initial reactions:

i love how the first minute of this show is uea being all "i am just your average guy... except i am so hot everyone desires me and it makes my life so hard. sigh."

HELLO YIM IN YOUR BOWL CUT NERD MULLET YES YES YOU ARE MY BABY MY SUNSHINE MY ETERNAL LOVE PLS TAKE ME AWAY IN YOUR SPACESHIP

so mark is like fine fine in that grown ass man way. pls someone tell me he is a lead in a show because i need

also like... am i the only one who thinks james is the soft, godly lovechild of yim and nat?

how can you dislike king and his jawline of doom. wait. oh my god. are having enemies to lovers thrown in this too?!?!? are they gonna hit all my fave tropes?!?

oh boy. OH BOY. something happened that night for sure sure

no but as a low voices appreciator this theme song is tickling my ears in a good way

ooh not the shiny shoes. damn, you really don't like the man.

oh this does not sound good but the stubble but OH FUUUUUCK

i have known uea for literally 5 minutes and 16 seconds and i am ready to murder anyone who hurts him

oh no. trauma.

yeah no, murdering anyone who hurts him is not enough. i need to go full vegas in a torture poncho on their ass.

the fuckboy has got the feels already 11/10 look at that face

in the non-creepiest way possible: i need to put these child actors into my pocket and feed them cupcakes

okay so the mom belongs in the bin

oh bitch DON'T YOU DARE call him

give my boy all the fuzzy blankets to cover up his sadness

noooo when do these boys learn pulling someone's metaphorical pigtails as a method of flirting will never work

ksdjfkalsfjasdlfj james since when have you been this PRETTY

king: babe, what can i do to make you like me uea: die

pock rhymes with cock which is exactly what you have to be to mess with my baby. a musty, unwashed, diseased cock.

jade is such a sweet bean and also a mood at the end of the day

i love how their gc is called "domundi"

what in the workplace parking garage showdown is this. also mark, daddy, step on me. respectfully.

okay, free karaoke emergencies are my kind of emergencies.

why does no one want to ride with the boss? I VOLUNTEER AS A TRIBUTE

lol, poor jade being thrown under the bus

is it gay to be unable to go through a single interaction with your workplace nemesis without standing face to face, intensely staring at one another? asking for a friend

ohhh cock is calling. hang up. that's a good boy.

this karaoke makes me miss my early twenties. also noooo, my baby jade letting loose while uea is like "pls god someone save me. end my suffering. existence is pain."

jade: i am about to vomit everyone else: THE FUCK YOU ARE WEAKLING boss: also you still have to work lmfao

butt. hehet.

oh nooo he has a cute lil man purse on top of the confidence to wear white pants? damn.

oooh he is drunk. i can see where this is going and i have conflicting feelings about it :')

i do not have conflicting feelings about these collarbones though. they are very much fire.

piggyback rides T T

okay but do i have to move to thailand to afford these condos on a single income?

one day these bl boys will be this gentle and soft yet also capable of resisting the urge to ravish their drunk crushes

(un)holy spiderman o.o

*distressed noises*

oh if you left snow white in bed all alone i am going to kill you

okay yes that is some tongue

i do love a strategically placed mustard yellow pillow

ooooh, it was king who had to wake up alone. oh my sweet babies. why do i feel so bad for both of them?

seriously, that bathroom is custom made. how much do these average salary men make?

JADE IN THE ICONIC YELLOW CARDIGAN

jade: omg what is wrong bestie uea: *war flashbacks to cock* sleep deprivaton

the fact jade is always drinking boba is just so in character. not that we know much all about his character but the point still stands. he is a boba boy.

oh that "mom" needs the bin asap. and you can't add a "we need to talk" text to that, king, you and your jawline need to time things better.

oh no. shit is about to go down in the copy room.

i love the alleged king of one night stands not comprehending one night stand etiquette. boy is down bad.

king: seriously uea: i am avoiding avoiding the subject, that's how deep my avoidance goes

they are just so laskdfjasdklfjsadlkfjaslkjfoierjudfj

why do i feel uea almost running people down with his car is a character trait

ugh, my poor baby is in pain and i don't know how to help (T⌓T)

THIS CAT

[eijispumpkin]

Okay okay okay, since Eiji is the one who can cook (it was displayed several times in the anime and manga), let's just say that Ash can't cook for shit, and I know that there's official art of him cooking, but no. He may be a great marksman and all that stuff, but he's absolutely clumsy in the kitchen - while trying to flip a pancake he just slaps himself in the face with one, while trying to simmer some sauce (also wearing wearing kitchen mittens cause he KNOWS he shouldn't be trusted alone in a kitchen) he turns around and knocks over the pot, despite all his efforts (I'm not good with scenarios). He may be observant as hell, but he has to try his best to be careful when working in the kitchen, but it just doesn't work. The kitchen is his nemesis, while Eiji is just a god at cooking and the kitchen is his paradise. Of course Eiji tries to help Ash out, but he can't help but make fun of him when the opportunity arises, of course playfully and with no bad intent or whatsoever. It's just nice to better at something than Ash Lynx. Needless to say, Eiji enjoys working with Ash in the kitchen, tho Ash causes some problems from time to time, but it's still all fun and games, since it's something they can do together and like in the gun scene in Cape Cod, Eiji stands behind Ash and leads his hand when he tries to cut some vegetables or whatever. You know, just them enjoying their domestic life

i absolutely love asheiji living their best domestic life, yes.

however i DO disagree that ash cant cook. i dont think he's like, a gourmet chef or anything, but given that he strives so hard for freedom and chafes at chains and the idea of depending on someone (especially someone like dino), i just can't see him not learning at the very least the BASICS of cooking - you can't live on your own and be independent if you can't feed yourself, and his independence is v important to him. so maybe he's not making a souffle or a fancy three-layer cake, but he can scramble some eggs or throw together a soup or stir-fry out of whatever he scrounges up in the fridge.

that being said i absolutely love learning curves and fully believe he's like. completely confounded by how to roll a good sushi roll that doesn't either a) come undone, b) fall apart from being overstuffed, c) get squished and mutilated while being sliced, or d) have the seaweed get too wet while he's working on packing in the filling. eiji's like "it's not THAT hard" and ash is like "fuck you don't talk to me until you can eat mustard without crying."

speaking of eiji: he's quite good in the kitchen most of the time... but his arch-nemesis is the air fryer. he can never get a feel for the right amount of heat and cook time and constantly has to adjust and add more time after stirring and checking and stirring and checking. he's like "what is the POINT of this it's such a PAIN!!! i may as well just deep fry it in a cast-iron pot like l LEARNED to do" and ash is like "ok old man, any other 'back in my day' feelings you wanna get out while you're at it?"

[reioka-reads]

I took a few days off and what do I come back to but Plague. Boo! >:( Oh, oof, that’s embarrassing John. I, personally, would simply pass away if my pharmacist was teasing me. Ah, so the rich wanted us to die for the economy  during the cholera pandemic too, huh? Eat the rich, then and now. Bro I thought TB was eradicated omg 😭 “Faulkner went on to argue that humans will not merely endure but will prevail,” Well, head death of the universe seems pretty insurmountable, personally. Bro this despair filling me is untenable. “...the extensively precedented tragedy of not being able to hold the hand of your beloved and say goodbye.” Ah, some people didn’t get to say goodbye to their loved ones at all. :( You’d think we as a species would learn. Your daughter is wise beyond her years, John. Or maybe she is wise because she is not yet grown up.

I thought Wintry Mix was a type of trail mix kill me. “Pathetic fallacy”? I don’t think it’s pathetic at all. “My nemesis has been alive and consuming the garden I cultivate for at least eight years.” Those other groundhogs weren’t in your garden tho. You have an Adirondack chair ins ide of your house?! Graupel? Sounds miserable. Also sounds like if I, a PNWer, said that to you, you would take it as an insult. Wilson Bentley?! Love that guy! John Ruskin? What a fucking asshole. Nobody tell me if he has redeeming features. Aw, what a beautiful way to fight your nemesis, John.

I can’t believe we have a second entry centering around hotdogs, but The Hot Dogs of Bæjarins Beztu Pylsur are here. Getting shitfaced and then getting knocked into a lake? Despite the glasses being damaged, this ultimately sounds like the most bangin’ trip ever. Oh wait oh my god I’ve heard him tell this story before, where they arrived just as Iceland was getting it’s first gold medal at the Olympics! What a beautiful moment, for all its weirdness. “Even now, I cannot look at a waterfall without thinking, ‘Very historic.’” But was the tour guide wrong? Are you? “Remoulade, sweet mustard, and bits of fried onion” This sounds fucking decadent. I have never wanted a hotdog so badly. Five stars and absolutely, beautifully deserved. I had no idea how a hotdog would get five stars, but now I understand.

The Notes App? Like from Apple? Okay. “I want to be a person who journals,” doesn’t everyone? Oh, he wrote in his books before the notes app. Somehow that’s very beautiful to me. Can’t get the visual out of my head. But how sweet that so many of his notes are a reminder to send something to his wife. Unfortunately, nothing ever tastes as good as it did in high school. Nothing. Ah. Sometimes the only good decision on a story is to scrap everything. 

Ugh, the Mountain Goats. God, I wish I could like the Mountain Goats. Everyone who likes them, loves them. I wish I could see what everyone else sees, but I just can’t. I like a song or two, but I can’t get into them as a whole. Their discography doesn’t interest me.

The QWERTY keyboard. “The reasons for this involve typewriter mechanics, a militant vegetarian, and a Wisconsin politician who belonged to three different political parties in the span of eight years.” Nothing could have gotten me more intrigued. Childhood ingenuity. Absolutely nothing like it in the world. Sholes sounds like a good guy. I’m gonna research him later. “Literary piano?” Love that! There’s a paper on the history of QWERTY. Why am I surprised. “Densmore was a passionate vegetarian who survived primarily on raw apples and was known for getting into arguments at restaurants...” Maybe because he was CONSTANTLY CONSTIPATED?! 

The World’s Largest Ball of Paint. Huh, that’s actually kinda beautiful? Starting something with his three-year-old and then having it become something huge. I had no idea where this was going but am absolutely mystified by how much I loved it.

[strangesmallbard]

bill/yaz! bill/yaz! bill/yaz!

It is Bill who is noticed first. This catches her off-guard.

"Is that work for astrophysics?" says this very pretty girl. The waning Oxford sun catches in her dark hair, spooled up into space buns. "I'm tryin' to get into that class, but the professor keeps blowing off my emails. I swear, I'm about to camp outside his office."

Bill laughs, though it's more of a nasally snort. "Might be a good idea, actually."

There are golden bloody flecks haloing this girl's irises! Her brow is set so determinedly! She needs to forgive herself for the absolute mess being an absolute lesbian is about to get her into, again.

"So it is astrophysics?"

Christ.

"Oh! Sort of." She looks down at the equation she's in the middle of solving. Maxwell's Equation, her nemesis. In her other hand there's a half-eaten ham sandwich from Tesco. There's a spot of mustard on one of her fingerless gloves. So sexy. "I'm auditing. Technically."

"But you know the professor, right? You could introduce me. I've seen you talking to him after class."

Okay, there's something in her eyes besides molten chemical number seventy-nine. It's around her eyes, actually; a tightness and a curling-in. Like she hasn't slept for days and like, Bill sees a lot of that around campus, particularly in the cafeteria. But her hands are on her hips, her shoulders are hiked up to her ears. She looks like she's about to punt God Herself into—

Hold on. "Wait, so you are in the...class already."

There's silence for a moment. The girl blinks a few times. As though Bill just scrambled her neurons with a few stupid words.

"Never mind, no worries. Yeah, I can totally introduce you to Dr. Smith. I really should warn you, though, he's a—"

The girl starts to cry. Oh fuck. Oh no. Oh fuck oh no.

"Sorry." She laughs, a harsh thing. "I haven't slept today."

"That's okay," Bill says, very gently. She takes a deep breath and holds out her sandwich like it's a basket full of warm chips. Then, she realizes that it's still an unsexy ham sandwich and has her teeth marks in it. She scooches on the stone bench and finally dumps the whole thing into the garbage can next to her. "Sitting down can help with all kinds of. Bodily secretion. That's....an astrophysics law?"

The Girl’s beautiful brow furrows deeply, as though she's trying to parse out exactly which astrophysics law it is, and then solve it all in her head. Perhaps she can do that, like the professor in question. In the last six months, this amount of frenetic energy has become very familiar. "No, I have to go. Besides, I've been a weirdo enough today—sorry, didn't catch your name before."

"Bill," she says. She holds out her hand, grins. "And you're really pretty normal, in my book. At least compared to some other books around here."

"Yaz Khan," Yaz Khan says, sticking her hands in her pockets. Her shoulders finally lower into a standard range of relaxed. She looks at the bench like she wants to say yes. Her long stare has too much yearning for Bill's big, gay heart. She wants to ask Yaz what is making her so sad and so devoid of melatonin.

It also piques her interest, she realizes. That Yaz wants to see the Doctor, specifically.

"Hey, can I get you a coffee?"

"What?"

"A coffee." She closes her notebook. Maxwell will just have to wait. "You know, the caffeinated beverage. It's all the rage."

"You just met me. For all you know, I'm a Dalek symbiont."

A what. "A what?"

The corner of Yaz's mouth turns up. "Don't worry about it." She wrings her hands together, once. Looks panicky. "I really do have to go."

Bill feels the gears in her head turning, clicking, sliding into place behind doors she can't quite find the key for yet. It's that hazy moment before a complete realization; when all of the Doctor's bizarre ramblings coalesce into one, unified theory. Einstein has nothing compared to Yaz Khan, however, that much Bill knows for certain. Relativity might as well be a slice of wheat bread.

That's a lie. Relativity is so fucking cool.

"No worries, Yaz. Here!" She rummages through her folders for the Doctor's stupidly formatted syllabus. She's certain his office hours are listed there, although she would not be surprised if they were missing. Bill's never seen a student in his office besides her. "I can give you my—"

She looks up. Yaz is gone.

Like. Literally gone.

No, wait. That's her over there by the Schwarzman Centre, making a grand getaway. Bill drops her folders again, frowning. Her shoulders droop, her heart pounds a million beats per second. That door, it's about to unlock. Yeah. There's something about this girl, alright.

[rynn-png]

Here’s more things I said @seabunnythatlikeshorror

Tw mentions of suicide (yes I cope with humour why do you ask?)

135:tumblr is like the NYC of apps

136:love the homocidal vibes

137:you are not queer unless you used Tumblr at least once

138:sorry was laughing at my dumb ass sister

139:thanks me I knew I made a good decision to hate you

140:I haven’t eaten this good since the last day of school party

141:you’re the main character and take that as an insult

142:I’m abt remake the bible with ATLA characters

143:sleep tight don’t survive the night

144:he looks like he’s abt to say “I’m a big boy and big boys don’t cry”

145:can I freestyle about suicide?

146:can we not mention Bruce Wayne’s Emo and I’m 37 and this is deep phase thank you

147:my asexuality said no

148:if my Pinterest page doesn’t turn out like that I will commit arson

149:I don’t understand jack shit and I don’t want to

150: No, just gonna feel bad for your older self having to deal with that while trying to sleep at 1 am

151: Gonna go pray what ever the fuck that was away

*101:you know I have the pain tolerance of a youngest sibling

*108:im about to do something called a “fuck you move”

152:finally geometry has a good use

153:nyehehe body dysmorphia my arch nemesis

154:if she cuts me with that voice it would be smooth like butter

155:so you’re a simp (unlike most of these I said that irl)

156: You might be less mentally ill but at least I’m older

157:I want to gag him and not the Doja Cat way

158:she’s adorable being crushed flat

159:and you didn’t even say “bad night”

160:I hope my hamster poops on you

161:it’s like thanos

162:I deep throated a camera

163:I accidentally spat on my own face

164: I just realized something, full on Mental instability is imaging your fav characters in a music vid instead of yourself

165:your honour…they’re gay

166:don’t think you’re hot shit when you aren’t even a shit

167:damn he be rocking that my chemical romance fit tho

168:am I a furry?

169:where can I find mascara that stays after death

170:I trust him cus he screams and I kin that

171:it’s hard being a main character okay

172: eyyy * i-need-therapy-finger-guns*

173: ✨ arson✨

174:and gulag is gulag

175:Tito president of Yugoslavia my beloved

176:you made one mistake there, it’s thinking I understood anything (said that to my math teacher)

177:it’s a minion flute want me to play something on it?

178:its too early anytime for everything

179:but who’s gonna be the poop?

180: But they’re cute and traumatized

181:not attracted you mentally unstable sicko’s

182:I’m an ok sign away from killing myself

183:her existing is some sort of phobic

184:just be careful gaslighting girlbossing and gatekeeping

185: okay lover mustard’s

186:this could be an album cover in a bad way

187:he’s my fav gender

188:I found a telatubbies fic at one am again

189:not in an among us way

190:don’t ask if I have a life

191:you yawn in German

192:MY SLINKY DOESNT SLINK

193:what does support even do in rpg games? Be a therapist friend

194: What deserved that reaction the Sam and max vore or the Freddy x chucky cheese

195: another day another gay

196:why *do* birds sing so gay

[psycheros]

my favorite pjo moment was probably when percy came back to camp just in time for inspections and finds out that tyson has completely decked out the cabin so it looks absolutely beautiful?

i fucking love tyson and they are such loving brothers i-

username: mayo | ranch | mustard | ketchup | honey mustard

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who i think ur godly parent is: hades or nemesis

help support black trans women!

[musikat18]

Eobard

Eobard Thawne’s Speedy Bastard Tea

Sandwich: Eobard, like Harry, also really likes burgers, but since there are no cows in the future, he’d probably shank me for trying to pass off a roast beef sandwich as a burger, so he gets a Cheeseburger Slider with Mustard and Tomato. Those two are very important toppings. This is an On-Brand-Only Tea.

Scone: The scone for Eobard is a Raspberry Scone with Lemon Curd.  Eobard does not get any cream to cut through the sour curd because his scone already has the word “berry” in it, which sounds too much like his nemesis already, and he will not have the ingredient representing his signature yellow dampened in any way.

Dessert: Eobard’s dessert is a Lemon Cupcake filled with Raspberry Jelly Beans and Buttercream. The cupcake is topped with yellow buttercream and a chocolate mold Reverse-Flash logo. Again, we are On-Brand-Only. Eobard lives for the brand. And jelly beans.

Tea: Because he needs to chill the fuck out, Eobard should get an herbal tea, like chamomile.

(Fandom Teatime!)

[envision-fandom]

Reputation

Peter Pan and Felix Fanfiction

What if Peter Pan and the other lost boys had been transported over to Storybrooke when Regina set off the curse and had lived an almost ordinary life growing up there? And what would that mean for you and your online pen pal?

Peter Pan was your childhood friend, next door neighbour and most recently your arch nemesis. 

You had been brought up together in the small town known as Story Brooke and you were inseparable as children. But now that you were older, and had more sense, you knew to keep him as far away from you as humanly possible.

You see Peter had created a type of reputation for himself since you both began high school four years ago and he was now the most feared boy in school, and in fact, the whole town. 

He had gathered a group of followers ‘The lost boys’, consisting of the meanest, largest, nastiest bunch of guys in school and to your confusion, the most gorgeous guy you had ever laid your eyes on- Felix. 

The Lost boys always got themselves into unholy situations, such as underage drinking, drug use, sex, stealing, but most of all fighting. By God did they all like to fight. 

It came to no surprise anymore when they would walk through the halls, covered in cuts and bruises or even on the odd occasion blood and you had grown so used to it, you would find it unusual to see them without a black eye or busted lip. 

They were the centre of attention and rumours spread about them everyday like wildfire, which would always leave you rolling your eyes and sighing at the absurdity of high school life. 

You swore you were the only one who wasn’t obsessed with the lost boys, or at least not all of them. 

But Felix was so much different compared to the rest of them. 

He was tall and skinny, with just the right amount of muscle. 

His long, wavy blonde hair always looked like perfection and his sharp jawline and shy smile was enough to make you drool. 

He had perfect grades and hardly ever took part in the crazy schemes Peter had come up with and yet for some strange reason, he was selected as second in command, which meant his popularity instantly shot through the roof. 

You had liked him since your first day of school, when he sat beside you in class and borrowed you a pencil. 

He had seemed like the most kindest and generous guy you had met and soon enough you had fallen in love with him. 

So when Peter had taken him away from you to join his ridiculous gang, you were furious and swore your hatred towards Peter, making him your arch nemesis. 

From that day forward you tried to ignore Pan and keep him and his gang as far from you as possible, but of course that only meant he wanted to annoy you more.

You always found yourself at the forefront of his childish pranks and although he never put you in any real danger, he had threatened your reputation as a moral student and you were sick of the mistreatment against you.

All you wanted was a normal high school life. Not to be followed around and embarrassed constantly in front of the boy you liked by a misogynistic asshole like Peter Pan. 

Thankfully, you were able to release your stress to your secret online Pen pal. Who goes by the username ‘Neverland99′.

You had met on the school’s chat line, when you were looking for information on an English playwright and he had come forward and provided you with a bunch of useful information. 

After that, you had begun talking ever night after school, which then lead to Good morning texts and even a few cheeky messages during the school day. 

Both of your identity’s still remained secret, but you knew almost everything about him. All except his name. 

He is in the same year group as you and his dream is to study poetry at college- which is a secret he has never told anyone before. 

You felt so connected to him and you easily found yourself revealing your secrets to him too, which lead to you becoming an emotional support for each other and he was always there for you when times were tough. 

You dream about him a lot and even though you have no idea who he is or what he looks like, you always pictured him with Felix’s face and just prayed that maybe your mysterious Pen Pal was him. 

You were thankful it was the weekend, as it meant you wouldn’t have to be pestered by Pan and his minions. 

You got up early and headed into work at Granny’s diner, excited to see your best friend Wendy. 

She attended the girls private school next to yours, which meant you never got to see her much. But you were glad you both worked together, as you could rant to her about your awful week and your dislike for Peter and like for Felix. 

You were just beginning to tell her about your late night messages with your pen pal, when your phone buzzed in your pocket. 

You glanced down to reveal a message from him saying ‘Are you working right now?’, which sent a smile straight to your face. 

Wendy lent over your shoulder and laughed “Speak of the devil.” She joked and you playfully hit her on the arm. 

“Nothing could ruin my mood right now.” You tell her and you instantly curse your words, because Peter and his lost boys had just walked in. 

“Ahh Y/N, my oldest friend!” Pan declares, as he sits down at the bar in front of you “How about you serve me a sandwich love?” A few of the lost boys laugh at his mocking tone and you are forced to refrain yourself from punching him right on his smug face, not wanting to risk losing your job. 

You take in a deep sigh, before meeting Pan’s eyes “Sure, what would you like on it?” 

You hated how his smirk widened and the way and evil glint flashes in his eyes “Surprise me.”

You turn on your heel and head to the kitchen to begin making his sandwich, slightly glad to be away from his intense stare- it had always sent a shiver down your spine. 

You buttered the bread and then smiled darkly to yourself, beginning to plan the best revenge. 

Being ex best friends with Pan meant that it did have it’s perks and growing up with him, you had noted the exact foods that he loved, as well as the one’s he hated. 

You placed pickles, mustard and tinned sardines on the bread, which he hates and then covered them up with layers of lettuce and cheese, which he likes. 

You took the sandwich out with your brightest customer service smile on your face, which you used to get more tips and placed the plate in front of him. 

You were slightly shocked to see him in deep conversation with Wendy and the fact that he was making her laugh. But you didn’t dwell to long on this, as you were excited to see the shocked look on his face when you “Surprised” him with his sandwich. 

He glances over at you and knots his brows in confusion at your bright smile, “Cheese and Lettuce.” You state and he nods in response, clearly he was expecting you to be pissed off for having to wait on him. 

“Thanks, you remembered what I like, what a good little servant you are.” He mocks and you roll your eyes, before glancing over at Felix, just to make it seem less conspicuous and if you had to look somewhere, it may as well be at the guy you like. 

You returned your eyes back on Pan, just as he took a bite of the sandwich and his reaction did not disappoint.

His face went as green as the pickles and he certainly didn’t look as attractive spitting out his food, on the verge of throwing up. 

He ran out of the diner, his followers chasing after him. You couldn’t help but laugh out loud that your plan had worked, but you instantly stopped when you noticed Felix still in the doorway, watching you. 

Your smile faltered as you stared at each other for a while, before he winked at you and left, leaving your heart beat pounding in your chest. 

You couldn’t believe Felix had winked at you and you were still flushed, even after returning home after work. 

You ran up to your bedroom, wanting to replay the moment in your head and revel in your victory, but stopped dead in your tracks as you swung your bedroom door open. 

Peter was lying down on your bed asleep. 

You sighed in disgust, it had been years since he had broken into your bedroom. 

He used to climb his way up onto your balcony every night and would sometimes stay the night, but that was before he became a complete asshole. 

You stood over his sleeping body and hated how attractive he looked not snearing at you. You shook him vigorously, wanting to get rid of him as soon as possible and hating the fact that for a brief moment you admitted he was attractive. 

He looked up at you with gentle eyes, before pulling you down onto the bed and hovering above you, his hands pressing against your wrists, preventing you from breaking free “Welcome back love, hard day at work?” 

You look up at him and smile “Actually it was quite pleasant after you had left.” 

He glared at you and the sight of his dark green eyes caused your body to shiver “You know I didn’t appreciate you making a fool out of me in front of my friends.” 

You try and push him off, but you are unable to move “Well now you know how it feels!” You spit back, annoyed at his arrogance. 

“Oh Y/N, you know I can make your life a whole lot worse. What I do to you, it’s child's play. I could turn your whole world upside down.” 

You glare back at him, shocked at his threatening behaviour.

“But I won’t...” He continues “If you help me out.” 

“Why should I help you?” You ask, curiously. 

“Because, as I just said, I could make your life a whole lot worse and you’re the only one who can help me...” He trails off at the end and finally lets go of your arms. 

You sit up questioningly, intrigued that Pan would come to you for help “What do you need help with?”

He stares out of your window awkwardly “Well, truth be told. There’s this girl I like- your friend Wendy.” He finally looks back at you with pleading eyes “I was hoping you could help set me up with her.” 

You laughed mockingly “You can’t be serious. As if I would help sadistic fuck boy like you, get with my innocent best friend! She’s way too good for you.” 

You stand up and gesture to your balcony “So you won’t help me?” 

You sigh, annoyed that he didn’t take your obvious hint for him to leave “No I won’t, now can you go?” 

You weren’t sure what would happen when you refused to help Pan, but it wasn’t what you were expecting. 

He simply lay back down on your bed and closed his eyes. 

“What the hell are you doing?” You ask. 

He opened one eye to look at you and shrugged “I’m staying here until you agree to help me.” 

You raised your eyebrows at him in response “Seriously? You’re going to resort to these childish games?” 

He ignored you, so you sighed in defeat and headed to your bathroom to get changed out of your work uniform and ready for bed. 

You were hoping Pan would be gone when you returned, but of course he was in the same position as when you left him. 

You were exhausted after work and wanted to sleep, bu couldn’t because he was taking up all of the room on your bed. You began to make a makeshift bed on the floor for yourself, when finally an idea popped into your mind. 

“Peter?” 

“Yes?” He responded almost instantly. 

“I’ll help you... only if you help me in return.”

He turns to face you and rests his head on his arm “I’m listening.” 

You cough awkwardly “I will help you with Wendy, as long as you help me with Felix.” 

He raises his eyebrow at you and smirks darkly “You like Felix?”

You could not believing you were about to admit your feelings to Pan, but you felt you had no other choice “Yes. Yes I do.” 

He laughs mockingly, before reaching his hand out towards you “You’ve got yourself a deal.”

[nightitan]

8  PEOPLE  YOU’D  LIKE  TO  KNOW  BETTER .

ONE ( ALIAS / NAME ):    Shannon / Non  TWO ( BIRTHDAY ): september 22nd  THREE ( ZODIAC SIGN ):    virgo  FOUR ( HEIGHT ):   5′8 FIVE ( HOBBIES ):   writing ,  video games , movies , baking , cocktail making ( drinking )  SIX ( FAVORITE COLOR(S) ): mustard yellow . oxblood & royal blue  SEVEN ( FAVORITE BOOKS ): great gatsby , bird box , nemesis  EIGHT ( LAST SONG LISTENED TO: )   langdon house , ISSUES  NINE ( LAST FILM WATCHED ):   glass TEN ( INSPIRATION FOR MUSE ):   fuck all i just wing everything i do  ELEVEN ( MEANING BEHIND YOUR URL ):   its dual , so its a split between night && titan but also it reads nigh titan and that’s hinting at impending doom 

TAGGED  BY :  @backspell  TAGGING : whomever is reading this 

[penaltybox14]

An imcomplete list of actual things that have occurred or are a thing at my job:

-16 straight hours making fun of my partner (with his partner, while I was third riding) because he didn’t get the diarrhea he wanted from a McGriddle Sandwich

-A firefighter whose company-wide nickname is “Schmedium” for his propensity to show off his muscles by wearing shirts ever so slightly too small for him

-Regular jokes about having HR on speed-dial

-Our supervisor sings “Happy slaves are here again! :D” every time he sees us/we go out on a call

-Same supervisor buys us snacks (ramen, hot chocolate, popcorn) and sometimes cake on his way into work-

-Basic EMT gave me a rubber mushroom to ward off evil at work

-Paramedic jumping the truck at 3am in boxers and socks because maybe it won’t work and we can go back to bed

-Firmly believed, for two years, that two medics were married to each other, only to find out they’re just work married.

-Apologies for catching air on that patch of roadwork at speed

-Deliberate attempts to catch are on that patch of roadwork at speed

-Fell asleep in the cath lab doing a standby

-Responded to dispatch’s “transfer of a patient with hypernatremia” with “to [hospital] for the salty patient, received”.

-Partner alternating cigarette breaks with double-fisting his inhalers

-Long-standing running joke about regular patient - “It’s Monday, must be seizure girl!”

-Advising nemesis ambulance company that seizure girl is absolutely going to seize in transit, have the midazolam ready

-Refer to coworker’s partner as his side-piece, coworker gets offended that I refer to partner as “just” his side-piece.

- “Unrelated, do you know anybody who needs a huge quantity of horseshit?”

- Can’t go to the detail without stopping for scratch tickets first!

- Coworker back at work: scratch tickets failed

- Absolutely no one wants to tuck in their uniform shirt at 2am I’m sorry.  Here’s to zipping up jackets and job shirts real tight and hoping no one notices!

Literally nothing about Johnny and Roy or Brice and Bellingham would surprise me at this point.  Roy is possibly the sanest medic we’ve met at this juncture.  Brice, while ruthlessly well-organized, is, as noted, the kind of medic that even the firemen know about.  But so is Bellingham. 

Hank accepted that Brice and Roy were not meant to be together, but that’s because he knows that Roy and Johnny are work-married (or whatever the 60s precursor to “heterosexual life partners” is, or maybe just that they belong on the Group W bench).  For the Cap at 36s (I think this is where they end up?), it’s sort of like watching the fable of the mouse and the lion unfold, but the mouse is obsessed with order and the lion is covered in blood and snores.  Sort of.  Something like that.  As long as the lion doesn’t roll over on the mouse in his sleep or - well, the metaphor gets complicated and Cap is just happy that SOMEBODY actually LIKES doing dishes.  Bellingham even helps and they’re just chatting the fuck away about weird medical shit, and like, that’s fine, but if Bellingham starts using the ketchup and mustard to draw diagrams on the plates at dinner again he’s gonna lose his shit, guys, we are trying to eat food here. 

The first time Bob realizes that something is maybe not quite normal (paramedic normal) between them is when Craig does something that is technically, within the rules but technically, really fucking stupid.  But okay, it was only like 1am, so it wasn’t full-crazy hour (which is somewhere between 2:45 and 4am, the quietest hour when everyone in the city is asleep however briefly), and yeah, you take a set of vitals, sure, and it’s a garden-level apartment so who would’ve figured the patient would have a roommate?  Maybe a pulse, maybe, but a roommate? 

The LAPD officer backing them up doesn’t put a damn thing in his report because who is going to believe that he saw a paramedic throw a grown-ass man across a room?  It was a small room anyway, and the medics are out the door with the gurney and a couple of attendants and a whole cadre of firemen who can absolutely handle a bruised noggin. 

It takes two medics to work a code, anyhow.  That’s what they call it: a code.  Short for code blue, like the hospital says.  The patient was kind of grey. 

Bob realizes after the call that the adrenaline has not subsided by the time they get back in the squad, which it is supposed to do, like the heart-rate of a well-trained athlete after a race.  Craig remarks that his jacket is ripped.  That’s news.  They go back to bed and Bob forgets about it til he’s home and shaving and holy shit some rando goddamn tackled his partner and he threw the sonofabitch into a couch.  Jesus, he thinks.  He should yell at Brice for being an idiot.  Getting his heart pumping like that, at one in the morning. 

He falls asleep instead.

Texts from Station 51

(well, at least I’m amusing myself)