#fucking frederick the second dude

[prussianmemes]

everyone that replied to this post is extremely annoying and are also extremely tone deaf because no, the op was not saying 'life in the 1600s rocked' - yes we know antibiotics were not around. we know childhood mortality was sky high. we know you worked back breaking labor in the fields as a peasant and your quality of life was definitively much worse than today, but that literally was not the point.

the point is that you people act like the past was a time when literally everybody was beheaded at the immediate first sign of deviancy, and that in fact nobody could have handled you being a quirky blorbo chungus or whatever, when infact, most people throughout history have acted in a pretty consistent way. your undiagnosed autism or adhd or anything is something literally nobody cares about. you being a random person who says silly things is actually not noteworthy at all and not going to make you a witch omg burn this woman / queer / whatever minority immediately. society was not some totally homogenous 100% uniform super straight hetero catholic paradise where everyone obsessively policed and tormented each other.

also to the one person saying "uhm actually we're fighting against a neo-reactionary trend of glorifying the past..." you are quite literally doing the same thing in the same vein as the reddit morons who pushed "the dark ages.... the middle ages were a time when society slid back from the roman golden ages... nothing happened for 700 years and people burned witches... muddled about in the dirt... and dogmatically worshipped the pope" as if the entire period wasn't mostly nobles having sex disputes with each other and sending guys to behead the pope because they didn't want to pay taxes for some doorframe.

i actually really hate those posts where everyone is like "ough oigh i would have died in 1600 because of [reason]" like its annoying and its actually fucking sad how so many of you seem to view the past and the people in it. Autistic people in the past had full and happy lives. Jewish people in the past had full and happy lives. You would not have been "burned as a witch" for having adhd, you have a persecution complex thats deeply annoying and ahistorical. The lives of marginalised people in the past were not just strife and suffering and dying violently and frankly its offensive that yall keep trying to reduce it down to such. Why are you so obsessed with erasing the spectrum of human existence why are you so obsessed with erasing joy why are you so obsessed with denying the capacity for marginalised people to have been happy

[monowritestoomuch]

Rant time part 2 for imperium

I’m back yall. Sorry I didn’t do the second part last night but doing it now ig

Vincent is up first and I am so scared (actually it was Sam but I didn’t realize)

RANT TIME

He's dating someone? Is it lovely? He seems okay but it’s literally been a minute

“I’ll never have to miss you again” excuse me my brother what exactly do you mean by that 🤨☝️

Hey so like if there’s a dentist appointment at 8pm don’t fucking take it the fuck????? Especially if you’re a new patient like brother huh the fuck?

“Welcome to our family” OH HELL TO THE FUCK OF NO GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE

“Doctor’s type” THIS IS WHEN YOU RUN MOTHERFUCKER

“Blood type” suspicious as fuck

Why the fuck he asking about night shift?

I am so so worried bro like I don’t think this turning is voluntary

OH ITS SAM NOT VINCENT

Every single dentist office I’ve ever been to had windows. Or at least one small one.

Dude this is going to destroy me emotionally

no because Sam in the main universe lore was turned against his will and was a healer like bestie what the fuck he’s going to turn us

Is Vincent even a vampire in this universe?

he thrall’d us we are such a dumbass we looked into his eyes we are A FUCKING IDIOT

oh it’s a trance

doesn’t make it better bro

FUCK YOU MEAN NICE CLEAN CUT

THIS ISN’T OLIVE GARDEN IM NOT JOINING THIS FUCKING FAMILY AH HELL TO THE FUCK OF NAW

A bonified vampire tf?

Plans for me? Oh fuck no. Why does he work for the Imperium fucking dammit.

Sam isn’t going to invoke us right?

Okay so indentured servitude so this system is like super fucked

can people like stop moving to dahlia this seems like the pop up stop for the Imperium

ECHO. WHEN I CATCH YOU ECHO YOU BASTARD—

I’m not handing my phone OH FUCK THIS IS BABY NOT LOVELY

IM STUPID

WAIT IS IVAN GOOD IN THIS UNIVERSE

Sam is such a sadistic fuck what the hell

DO NOT NOD YOU DUMBASS

THIS ISN’T FUCKING OLIVE GARDEN

Pack is next and I’m more scared bc why is Asher alpha—

Who the hell is this—British fellow??

OH ITS CHRIS

Oh Asher’s here

Oh no that’s Milo

HES THE BETA

Okay they work at the academy. Security team.

SWEETHEART IS STILL ALIVE

Is this Asher’s listener?

“What were you after?” I was after yo mama

okay why the fuck we steal papers

Records? Meridian??? Ah fuck. We’re fucked.

ASHER

WHAT DID THEY DO TO MY BOY HE’S GONE EMO

WHY DID ECHO EMO MY BOY

damn we going in the white free candy van

Hey maybe Asher is a good alpha. Look I’m trying to be positive here guys—nevermind—

DAMN HE IS FUCKING CHRISTIAN UP OKAY UHHHHHHHH

he’s calling him out damn

oh fuck Asher got the Peter Parker special with David as Uncle Ben

My guy needs some serious fucking therapy fucking hell where is Cam when you need him?

oh Darlin is also dead oh fuck

Oh we have a resistance? Ooooooo

WE HAVE SPIES FUCK YEAH

WAIT NO WHY ARE WE TALKING

There’s only two of us-wait freelancer coordinator? Wait is that our Freelancer or is that—STARLIGHT!!! AVIOR’S LISTENER BABY—

Yeah we been knew that the Imperium is a piece of shit

Oh Asher is pissed. Damn brother has really bad trauma and probably depression. Hook him up with a therapist please

FUCK YOU QUINN

ECHO WHY DID YOU KILL DAVID WHAT THE HELL

Ooooookkkkkaaaayyyyyy

Okay wow Imperium!Asher is spitting bars

Oh the world is ending we been knew

OH HE BELIEVES US FUCK YEAH

YAY

“You’re serious about this?” serious as a heart attack

Oh wait how did Gabe die? Car crash?

PACK’S DEN HELL YEAH HE’S GONNA WORK WITH US

IT’S A STEP FORWARD HELL YEAH—

He’s gonna help us 😁👏

Sadistic vamps are next and then the welcome back video—let’s get started:

VINCENT??? or is it porter I can’t tell. I think it’s Vincent

Oh. Oh no.

ON HALLOWEEN ARE WE STUPID???

wait we aren’t empowered here?

ADAM AND VINCENT WHAT T HE FUCK

wait is it toxic yaoi?

I WAS FUCJING RIGHT LOL

DAMN ADAM IS AIRING HIM OUT

It is toxic yaoi. Y’all I didn’t think Erik would make toxic yaoi canon

FREDERICK AND BRIGHT EYES ARE DEAD?!

ruh roh lovely run

I’m sorry what are we trying to do 😃☝️

”while I explore a bit” NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE

Ah shit

ALEXIS WENT TO THE DEPARTMENT

Bro is losing his shit to blood he hasn’t even tasted uhhhhh WEIRDO

NO NO GET YOUR FANGS AWAY

I have two hands, not two vampire boyfriends, or idk vampire creeps

The sounds coming through my earphones unsettle me

Damn we have good ass blood—oh wait cuz when’re empowered oh yeah we’re electric

Okay Cerevantes from Escaped audios I see you—(I’m sorry I had to) THEY ACT LIKE HIM AND THE OTHER VAMP

*sigh* toxic yaoi at it’s finest

“You are a King’s mistake” HOT DAMN ADAM

NECK SNAP

Damn Adam’s dead.

TOXIC YAOI AT IT’S FINEST

we tried to run and failed *sigh*

hold them down starts playing

Buddy I don’t like this

At least Adam is dead

I still don’t like this

*sigh* men *shakes head*

“Lovely bloodbag” well fuck

Time for the welcome back echo’s gonna psych me out again

“Was that as good for you as it was for me?” NO THE FUCK???

Surprise???

Yeah I kinda assumed the Imperium was piece of shit

*sigh* tHe cANoN

“I certainly learned a lot over the course of these videos” man is shaming us lol

respite? Bro doesn’t get shiiiiiiiiiiiitttttt

“Or a living Adam” YOU SIMPS HE FOUND YOU LOL 🫵🫵🫵

I’m betting redacted just reads through his comments when he needs to write echo

are we finally going back to Asher?

FUCKING FINALLY HES BACK REGULAR ASHER

I HAVE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER TO SEE HIM

Y’all I am glad that we are back

WHY IS ASHER FLIRTING MAN IS MAKING MORE YAOI

Awwww David

ANGEL AND DAVID TOGETHER IM SO HAPPY YOU HAVE NO IDEA

PIZZA AND WINGS FUCK YEAH

Awwwww he’s being so niiiiiiccccceeeee

I forgot this takes place before the Inversion

Ah f u c k—

awwwww your honor they’re bonding

They’re besties your honor—

“I love you Buddy” “I love you too, now shut up” FUCK IM SO HAPPY

“Bug guy thinks he’s so tough” he’s alive and I’m happy okay?

Lesson learned: a world without caelum goes to literal shit

Anyways hope you enjoyed my silly rant

[oym-a-wii-deleted-you-au]

So how's your version on Nathan and Will?

(Sorry I couldn’t understand whether you meant the blog’s AU or the admin’s lore, plus I’ve yet to make a design for OyM!Nathan, so imma just assume the OG for this one)

Forgive me for my awful grammar, I’m not that good at English-

About Nathan:

•Basic infos, he’s 17, about Kyle’s age— just a month or two older than him.

•Of Brazilian descent but has Chilean blood in him.

•Full name is Nathaniel Frederick Bernadez.

•Has undiagnosed ADHD.

•He has an older sister Lucille (basically Luna from OnC but she’s more normal about CJ than her canon counterpart). They both fan about On Command together.

•Transgender FtM and biromantic with a preferable lean for guys. (Pronouns He/they/dusk)

•Was scared of EteleD shitless, so much that he basically cut ties with Kyle for taking it for a prank, and told everyone on school about it, which lead to them getting bullied for 9 years straight.

Kyle forgives him for it but they’ve made it clear they don’t want anything to do with him for the timebeing. The closest they get to interact is just small talk and hello’s.

Kyle did promise he’d open up to him in the future, he is just not ready to see him as of current.

•Has a crush on Will but is kinda scared to ask him out because of his own insecurities and also since Will’s already seeing someone else at the moment.

•Keeps a heart-shaped locket at all times on himself— a gift from his grandmother, before she passed.

The locket contains a photo of her holding a newborn Nathan, with Kyle’s mom beside them. That’s how he and Kyle knew each other since their birth.

•He is the man that drinks milk before cereal and then eats the cereal dry /j

•Has that friendship-rivalry-thing with Sam as a joke because they used to hate each other in the past, but now are getting along pretty well.

•Basically the cool dad of the group. Also he’s the second tallest after Dan.

About Will:

•He’s 16— only 25 days younger than Sam.

•Of Belgian origin.

•Has three siblings and a cousin— basically the same people Rudolph (OyM) is related to

•Has never been close with their parents for unknown reasons, which means he and his younger sister was practically raised by their 2 older siblings in their absence.

•Their real name is actually Rudolph Forgers, but for confidentiality reasons had to psuedofy himself, so he currently goes by William Roberts.

•Currently figuring out their gender identity but knows they’re omnisexual. (Pronouns they/ey/he/she/rex)

•Does have a big crush on Nathan, but is scared they’d get rejected so they instead tone themselves and pretend he’s crushing on Cooper.

•He used to be jealous of Sam since Middle School because she was better than him in almost everything, and even had a loving mom. It never went beyond taunting and small shoving, though.

They’ve since sorted themselves out and are cool buddies.

•Looks abrasive and brash, but is a sweetheart who’d give their life to protect anybody dear to him.

•Only a tad bit shorter than Dan and Nathan, but taller than Sam, Cooper and and Kyle combined.

•Small fact: They’ve got little fangs. It’s a birth gene.

•No kidding, this dude looks like he’d kill you, but is actually a cinnamon roll.

Wait fuck that’s the same thing as the other point help-

[kingdoms-and-empires]

Given that Daerin II was the father of Otto, it's no wonder that he didn't accept Frederick. I mean, grandpa probably dealt with a lot of bastard siblings during his youth. Also, from what I read, Queen Calmiel ruled in the same era as that hedonist, what would happen if Daerin II flirted with her in one of the peace treaty meetings🤣?

Okay, first of all,

Second of all, IF that happened (it wouldnt because dude was too busy drowning in NSFW and couldnt be bothered about a literal war) Queen Calmiel, hilariously would fuck him.

She

fucks

HIM.

Just to say she fucked the empire both literally and figuratively.

Honestly MC gets his/her hoe genes from the both of em lmaoooo

[anonymous-dentist]

can I still ask for a fun fact :3c

Europe has always been among the cringiest places on the planet, and uh.

Crusades? Yeah. Let’s talk about the Third Crusade aka the Kings’ Crusade, but specifically about how it started out because ooooooh boy

So the Crusades, for anyone unfamiliar, were basically a bunch of wars between Western Europe and the guys living in what they called the Holy Land, aka modern-day Israel and Palestine and the areas around there. See, Jerusalem was being held by an Islamic empire, and Europe fucking HATED that, so they got on a bunch of boats and went to terrorize the Middle East because that’s white people’s historically-proven cultural pastime

The Third Crusade came off of the Second Crusade, which the Zengid Dynasty wound up winning. The Europeans were pissed, so they headed off on their third attempt at retaking the Holy Land

Our first king is Holy Roman Emperor Frederick Barbarossa. He had a pretty good run, all things considered, getting all the way from what we now call Germany clear to what is now Turkey at the ripe old age of 66. He won several battles, lost a few, fucked with the Byzantines, and devastated Turkish forces.

That sounds like a win, right?

Well, it was, but then his horse slipped in a river somewhere in Turkey and he fucking died. His son, another Frederick, was so bad at getting his dad’s bones to Acre and everything that he had to outsource help to this dude called Conrad of Montferrat, who was technically the King of Jerusalem, but he himself would get assassinated by the Assassins (and they were assassins) literal days before his crowning

Our second king is Philip II of France, who is legit so unremarkable in terms of the Crusades that most of his involvement in them is him leaving them after getting dysentery and almost dying after being Very Bad At Crusading

Our third king is the only semi-competent one, Richard I of England, aka Richard the Lionheart, and he’s technically our fourth king because it was the king before him, Henry II, that tried the whole Crusade Thing before dying in a tragically British fashion. So we’ve got Richard, and he’s the only king here who actually managed to get to the Holy Land.

At first, Richard and Philip were at war. And then they said “hey wait let’s go just beat up Muslims instead”. And then they said “I hate you more than Muslims actually” and they started beating each other up, hence why Philip ended up leaving in the end.

Drama Happens! There’s some whole bullshit regarding marriage and then that dude from earlier, Conrad, because, guess what? Richard might’ve been the one to send the Assassins after that dude. Omg!!

But honestly? Not much to say about Richard. He did his (terrible horrible racist) job, and he won the Third Crusade. Sort of.

Well, Europe didn’t end up taking back Jerusalem. They would not, in fact, get Jerusalem back… ever! They had it for like two minutes during the Sixth Crusade, but they still don’t have control over the Holy Land to this day, much to their obvious annoyance

What happened with the two living kings? Well, they went back to war, of course! Richard would eventually die in an extremely comical and tragic and British fashion, getting killed by an arrow fired by a literal child. Philip would eventually die of Being Too Hot because he went traveling in the middle of summer while being pathetic and middle aged and French

[greyroses02]

so many. Things HAPPENING! GIVE ME A SECOND!!

First of all as a Luca lover since day one:

HES HES REAL REAL REAL!!!

He’s gorgeous beautiful! THRIVING!! Once skin is real!!! AAAASHDJWJSKKSJEHWB I’m tired I thought it was an evolved version of the ivory tower series or some shit lmaooahshajjahs

Idk if you’re a child or a grown man but my poor dude who did this to you I want to have a talk. Your doll is so fucking ugly but I’ll forgive it cause you look cool. Lily getting an a-tier so soon I’m shocked!! But it’s cute and I love it. Night watch is kinda ugly looking (it’s the mask-helmet thingie that’s why lol) maybe HOPEFULLY the model looks better and they gave him dark hair too! 🥰🥰

SO I’m gonna wear it anyway cause he still beautiful and finally got an atier besides deduction Star 🥰

Oh hand in MARRIAGE MAAM PLS IM ON MY KNEES!!

You’re so pretty I definitely gonna get you even tho I don’t play you as much anymore 😭😭

a.

Time to suffer in rank again… 🫠

And oh.

Oh oh oh oh. I like this. I like this concept a lot. Emil. Mr. Emil Mesmer!! I want him the most!! 🤲

Feaster looks so cool, I don’t really like (playing against) him but this skin…damn I almost want to get it…

So hyped for the COA animations!! And it looks like Frederick’s the leader I like that. Appoint the man who has experience with guns, smart. 🤣

Honorary mentions: Ann and Mary are slaying goodness gracious. And if I said I nearly choked on my spit when I saw Naiad and Wu Chang’s nymph-whatever-it’s-called would you believe me? My mouth was AGAPE! They are all beautiful 😭😭😭

This is gonna be torture for f2ps and low spenders (me included(

[simyunie]

i finally finished fe: awakening (for the second time; i played it around a decade ago so i forgot most of it and wanted to replay it)

post-game thought dump below

i played it on hard-classic and MY GOD was it difficult. i can't fathom lunatic at this point. that fucking tree chapter was THE worst.

it really felt like an uphill climb until mid-game when i started to get the 2nd gen units. my unit married libra and apparently this is not meta but my morgan still ended up sooooo busted it was actually terrifying.

my morgan was a magic user that was on par with kellam for tankiness. having inherited libra's renewal, my lil dude was practically unkillable. (except for that one time i got a bad rng roll and had to reload but shhhhh)

characters were cute and all but awakening really did feel like chrom and robin's story. i wish the characters' tropes weren't so exaggerated because it made them feel a bit one-dimensional. i am still very sad over how kellam turns out in the end—dude deserves more recognition after being my main tank.

i was also pretty sub-optimal with my pair ups and xp + support farming so i only ended up with a few couples and some children were not available. i wasn't able to increase the early game characters' stats so i missed out on kjelle, brady, inigo, and laurent. i only figured out how to boost them when it was too late ;______;

i ended up with the following couples: MU/libra, chrom/sumia, frederick/nowi, lon'qu/panne, lissa/vaike, tharja/henry, cordelia/kellam, and cherche/virion

i don't really ship most of these and honestly i don't really have a lot of actual ships from awakening? i mean compared to three houses. they weren't really super compelling, though they were cute. chrom/sumia just happened because the pair-up bonus was good and i ran with it. MU/libra happened because i love libra. thank you.

libra made me realize i probably have a type LMAO i thought linhardt, and yuri were a coincidence, but after libra... i just knew.

cordelia/kellam gave me a really busted severa. one-woman army, that one. i would have her and morgan fend off wave after wave of reinforcements.

tharja/henry i did for the lulz but also i regretted it a bit because i didn't plan properly and ended up with two dark mages to sorcerers with the same skills passed onto noire... who was not a mage.

i don't really have much incentive to play it for a third time but i wish i played a bit smarter so i could have gotten more out of my save file, lol. i still feel sad over all the other characters i didn't get to develop.

i will now move on to another fe game, but i'm not sure if i want to do path of radiance/radiant dawn, or the fates trilogy... or maybe genealogy? lol i would probably cry though, i heard the older FE games were HARD hard.

[blacklist-notary]

#101: The Alchemist

Synopsis: Reddington gives Elizabeth a lead on the next Blacklister, a character known as the Alchemist. He's capable of manipulating people's DNA and dental records to such a degree that he can ostensibly change one person into another one - or at the very least, he can make one corpse seem like it belongs to an entirely different person.

Of course, you can't just put a dead body on a crashing plane and expect the autopsy to overlook the discrepancy between the impact of the plane and the time of death; the people he transforms are still alive when he works on them, and they may even be conscious when they end up dying in place of the Alchemist's clients. He uses this system to sell entirely new identities and lives to the criminal underworld at the expense of the innocent people who die in their place.

The Tom/Liz storyline gets picked back up with this episode - specifically, the topic of adoption comes back up. Their mutual friend is due in six weeks, and she wants to give Tom and Liz her baby for them to raise as their own. Of course, Liz is married to the job and Tom is trying to come to terms with her current work/life balance, which comes up later when one of Tom's colleagues throws the pair a baby shower.

And Reddington is still pursuing the mole who allowed Anslo Garrick into the Post Office. This time, he has a data guy with a room full of shredded documents - second-rate information at best, and almost impossible to reconstruct. But Reddington, as the guy who's bankrolling this whole operation, decides that he wants everybody to drop what they're doing and piece those documents back together - one strip at a time.

Thoughts: The Tom/Liz plot falls a bit flat. Keeping with my personal theory that Season 1 of the Blacklist was split into two filming blocks - with the Anslo Garrick two-parter marking the end of the first filming block in case the show got cancelled - this episode helps to reboot that initial plotline and bring Liz and Tom's home life back into the forefront just in time for the second half of the season.

And the reality is that they had life goals and responsibilities they were pursuing before Reddington complicated things - and with Liz's work taking up all of her time now, Tom feels like she's neglecting the life they've been trying to build. Tom's role in this episode is to serve as an anchor for his and Liz's pre-FBI life, and that puts Liz between a rock and a hard place; she loves Tom and wants to start a family with him, but at the FBI, she spends this episode hunting down a dude who can CHANGE A PERSON'S FUCKING DNA.

On a character level, this sort of work/life imbalance conflict is understandable through both Liz's and Tom's eyes.

In practice, it's kinda maudlin character drama.

I'm in two minds about this aspect - but I'll put a pin in that. Taken wholly at face value, though, I will say this plotline is kind of angsty and cliche, and I don't like it.

Reddington is in decent form, though this episode is fairly light on his usual presence. His appearance in the episode's cold open is literally just to give Liz the Alchemist; the scene opens with them in the same room and Reddington just... tells her about the Alchemist.

There's no biting remark or remarkably bitchy comment - I remember a line in an early episode where Liz and the task force are waiting for people to call into an FBI tip line, and Reddington calls in a tip for Liz: "dress in darker blues, you're more of a Winter than an Autumn".

That leads into Liz walking in on Red to hear what he has to say about the perp of the week - whereas in this episode, there's no "foreplay" (for lack of a better term) to the way this scene is written.

I don't dislike this episode, if only because I thought that the Blacklister of the week was a cool concept and a fun character. If I was being more critical, I would say he's a bit of a rehash of Frederick Barnes - but still, I like the character and I like the whole Alchemist angle where he kidnaps people, implants them with DNA and modifies their teeth enough to fool any forensics teams who find their bodies. The scene they use to demonstrate the concept at the start of the episode is absolutely horrifying.

Weaker than usual episode imo, but I do think that the shredded document storyline is a much-needed breath of fresh air that the episode needed.

[maxthewickedgoblin]

after two years of putting it off and side-eyeing it a little bit I finally got FE Engage for cheap (€20), and am currently about 4 hours in.

First impressions under the cut, spoilers..? (if that's even a big concern for engage)

non-battle impressions

Number one, the opening actually had me cackling. I'm used to corny anime openings, and I KNEW this game had one, but it still managed to completely catch me off guard. Like I'm speaking of "exiting to the Switch homescreen" kind of shock reaction.

While I'm not rlly huge on the art style, I have to say that this game is very pretty. Certainly looks very polished and like they knew how to push the Switch's capabilities, but without overworking it. Console is quiet as a mouse and that's nice.

I hope the next FE that has you choosing a gender for the main character actually gives them a fixed name. Like, God please just call me Alear. I didn't mind it too much in Awakening, Fates, or 3H because they had kinda sensible replacements for "name", but even in those games it got a little old by the end. Being addressed as professor by your students/colleagues or sister/brother by your siblings felt a hell of a lot more natural than "Divine One" and "Divine Dragon" by everyone around you. This would be fixed if they just called them Alear, because "I am the Divine Dragon" "That's a great name" sounds fucking stupid.

The Somniel looks very nice but god by now I just yearn for the Castle that Fates had. A top-down hub where you'd spend maybe five minutes to gather your essentials if you needed anything, less than 20 seconds if you didn't, and go onto the next battle, supports excluded. Where you didn't need to traverse for an eternity. A perfect in-between of Awakenings barracks and the monestary. The Somniel certainly seems smaller than the monestary but has so many twisted paths from what I've seen so far. I hope it gets a bit more interesting as the story goes on because if not I'll probably skip out on conversing with all my allies. (if fates ever gets a remake and they replace mycastle with a 3d hub I will eat rocks)

I like how they kind of kept the uniform concept from Houses. It's nothing groundbreaking for characters to have casual fits in a hub but I just really like how they switch out of battle attire when they're simply chilling.

Speaking of them though I like how Alear's Stewards refuse to let them do anything mundane. They waited a 1000 years for this so they're gonna wash that fucking laundry goddammit. I like that. It's very Jakob, with a sprinkle of Frederick.

I've only had three support convos so far (w the Jaegen looking dude, Clanne and Framme. idk if this changes, but they're unbelievably short. Like over in less than a minute.

This game's Auto-Advance with VA'd text is too fast. It can't just be me right? There's no natural gap inbetween text boxes and it irritates me more than I think it should.

The voice acting is Fine™️ so far but they really bit themselves not fully voicing everything in here. It's hard to go from 3H to this. Especially since Houses feels miles ahead when it comes to the acting itself as well.

I was barely 90 minutes in and could already see where people are coming from when they say this story sucks, but I dare to propose a theory here. The story seems real simple which isn't a problem for me, make me attached to the characters living through it and we're golden. It's the writing. It's so... Stiff? Stilted? Short? I'm not sure what to call it but it's certainly something. The text speed and (sometimes) odd delivery doesn't help it.

battle impressions

IntSys needs to lean more into mothers very obviously dying like two hours in. Either make it kind of funny or turn them into actual characters. It didn't work with Mikoto and it doesn't work here. I'm so sorry but I feel absolutely no emotion when I see this character who I know is gonna die in 20 minutes. Another option would be to not have their kids be separated from them for long enough to not even remember who their mother is. Jeralt wasn't perfect but certainly a step in the right direction. Why go back on that?

So far the music is the most disappointing part of this game, to me, specifically.

The Emblems telling you that you're overpolishing their tings is pretty funny

Why, why, do new FEs want to HIDE THE GRID IN AN OPTIONS MENU FROM ME!! (found it tho)

moving the unit instead of the cursor feels like the devil is slowly eating away at my brain as I play the game (thank GOD you can change this too but. the default feels so wrong.)

I like how your first healer has fists as her weapon of choice. Not even knuckles or anything. Just fists.

I'm curious to see how many Backup units you get that can perform Counter attacks. Maybe this'll be essential, maybe it'll be something I forget to utilize immediately. 50/50 chance I'd say.

The Emblem mechanic seems like a fun gimmick to scale when you get more users for it, but so far I'm not terribly impressed by it. Other than that it uh. Sure is fire emblem? You stab they stab back.

I'd say I'm pretty neutral about it all so far.

[arwainian]

Reading This Week 2023 #4

First week of the last semester of school and so school focused reading begins. A lot of these things i will be reading incrementally as the semester moves on so they will just keep showing up. Also uh, my cat died this morning. So this week and in the coming weeks there is gonna be a lot of fanfic and comfort fiction reading I think.

Finished:

Mountains and Badgermolehills by Glass_Onion on ao3

this was cute and funny and serious in a way that I think really accurately matched the original show's tone. my friend and I agree that Sokka and Katara are a tad too nice, BUT the pitch perfect characterization for Zuko and Aang makes up for it

Started and FInished:

Even Though I Knew the End by C.L. Polk

really compelling novella, where i think I caught most of the reveals coming and yet was thoroughly entertained the whole way through

Prologue to Highbrow/Lowbrow by Lawrence W. Levine (pp. 1-9)

compelling discussion about how we divide and discuss various entertainments, which will be relevant as I study 19th c. North American pop culture this semester

fe3h fic, all on ao3 (which yes, I'm still reading a ton of):

Your hairpin breaks my shield and my sword by signalbeam fell star (and those that keep it lit) by fearthedeeer Point of No Return by Panny In Obscurum by wearwind The Principle of Uncertainty by wearwind A Promise, Snow-Swept by wearwind

I physically cannot recommend wearwind's work enough. They write such a wonderful Claude, and In Obscurum was both long enough and compelling enough to keep me occupied the entire morning yesterday when I was generally having a pretty sucky day waiting to get home. Also it's a hilarious rarepair. *shakes Hubert as he appears in that fic* why did you make yourself so miserable and doomed you stupid fucking bitch

Soft Things by Arpad on ao3

cute lil fatt fic that has tided me over for the flood of fanworks that will arrive on the morrow

Started and Ongoing:

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

this is my second time reading through P&P, though the first time was through an audiobook. it's just as much of a delight the second time through, and I'm really looking forward to discussing it in class

The Cambridge Companion to Jane Austen edited by Edward Copeland and Juliet McMaster

The Making of Jane Austen by Devoney Looser

These two are obviously companion reads to the Jane Austen class I'm taking, and I am not that far into them yet. Mostly they serve to give historical context to austen's life and works, which is really cool

Sam Patch, the famous Jumper by Paul E. Johnson

reading for that historical pop culture class. this dude jumped off oa waterfalls! and fucking lived!

War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy, translated by Constance Garnett, narrated by Frederick Davidson

unlike literally every other book in this section, this is actually a leisure read, because as I might have mentioned elsewhere, this is my dad's favorite book! It. Is very long. And even with an audiobook I have enough mandatory reading elsewhere that it's just gonna take a while no matter what. However I'm really delighted by what I have read so far and I am excited to continue

[three-moving]

Lissa or Henry from Awakening!

put this one off until i could do it from my computer so i can properly look through the wiki so sorry for the delay!

lissa first:

My general thoughts & opinions on them

i did not expect to like lissa as much as i do. she's cute and bubbly and is my sunshine child in a game with so many hardships. it took me some time to warm up to her but i now absolutely adore her (and it doesn't hurt that in warriors she's swinging around a bigass axe like it's nothing -- girlboss shit right there)

Favorite moment of theirs

i've always liked the scene after fighting "marth" in ferox where lissa starts going on about how "he's so dark and mysterious... he's so dreamy..." it's just very funny to me knowing that it's actually her niece she's talking about. i don't have a great recollection of awakening because it's been a while since i last played but every so often i think about that bit and have a little giggle.

Favorite support chain

good LORD i do not remember. i went through some of her supports and the ones with frederick are standing out among them (also, i don't think i unlocked half of those in game! they feel very new to me). i think the idea of lissa teaching frederick to relax is goddamn hilarious and would be a sight to see.

My dream FEH alt for them

okay so she's already got valentines and winter yeah? i'd love to see a halloween alt for her. she's got the right energy to really have a good time in costume and i just think it'd be a fun little time!

Headcanons and/or ships I have

i didn't ship it until finishing the game and looking through tumblr, but lissa x maribelle is super cute and i just. i appreciate their dynamic a lot.

Favorite art of them

had to do a bit of searching but the one at the bottom of this post is everything to me

henry time!

My general thoughts & opinions on them

he's just a silly funny dude having a good time and i love that for him! his fucked up humour always makes me laugh

Favorite moment of theirs

his intro all the way. he's on screen for like ten seconds and you've already figured out his personality just from that. it's great.

Favorite support chain

it's not my favourite chain but henry's a-support with miriel makes me laugh. they're just. they're trying to figure out where babies come from. that's really funny to me (and also henry is just trying to be helpful to a pregnant mom and that's so sweeeeeeeeeeeeet)

My dream FEH alt for them

if he didn't already have a halloween one i'd say that for him but alas. aside from that, i'd kill for a plegian alt. if anyone deserves it it's the character that's actually from plegia. i think he'd look great!

Headcanons and/or ships I have

i can't actually think of any at the moment! i believe i had one when i was playing through the game but it's slipped my mind and i am tired of going through supports lmao

Favorite art of them

i haven't seen a lot so for now i don't have an answer, sorry!

thanks for asking and sorry for the long post lol :)

[hiddentrails7]

A few more gay-wakening quotes + a few ikesoren quotes for you raccoons (Ily u guys thank u for the support-)

Lon'qu: Hey dad- wait- I mean-

Basilio: No, no, no.

Basilio: No take backs.

Maribelle: Brady’s anger management classes are a fucking scam, mf told him to hit Owain with a brick yesterday! 

Frederick: It’s called Reverse Psychology, Maribelle…

Maribelle: Reverse? Bitch this isn’t UNO!

Ricken: Can we please stay in your tent?

Robin: Why?

Ricken: We played with a Ouija board and cursed mine....

Ricken: And Henry isn’t much help. He doesn’t know how to banish spirits so he just throws salt at them and yells “does this look like a hotel to you?!”

Vaike: Beauty and the Beast, but reversed. I kiss the girl and she turns into a monster and it’s awesome

Sully: Shrek.

Vaike:

Vaike: This post is canceled

Sumia: Coward

Lissa, pretending a hairbrush is a microphone: And now for a gay update with Henry. How's it going?

Henry, starring at Ricken: Getting gayer.

Lissa: Thank you, Henry.

Donnel: Do you ever feel bugs on you when there aren't any?

Sully: Those are the ghosts of all the bugs you've killed.

Donnel:

Stahl: Look what you did, you scared him!

Robin: You're the love of my life and my best friend, I would do anything for you.

Chron: I want you to eat three meals a day and have a healthy sleep schedule.

Robin: Absolutely not.

Brady: Ok guys shut up *Answers phone* Hey, mom.

Owain: miSsEs MaRiBeLlE tEll yOuR sOn tO coMe bAcK tO bEd

Inigo: *Sex noises*

Owain: BABE, WE CANT HAVE A THREESOME WITHOUT YOU!

Cynthia: Tell her i say hiii!!!

Severa: pAss the wEeEEeEeeEeEeeeE-

Ike, peaking under the bed: Soren, are you ready to come out and interact with people?

Soren: *Demonic screeching*

Ike: Understandable, have a good day

Stahl: Why is there blood everywhere!??

Lon'qu: I may have aggressivelly poked someone with my blade.

Stahl: yoU STABBED SOMEONE!?!?

Lon'qu: No no, aggressively poked them with my blade..

Robin: Chrom. Is that your hand on my ass?

Chrom: Oops. My bad. It was an accident.

Robin: Your hand is still on my ass.

Chrom: Still an accident.

Doctor: Mr? Your boyfriend's awake.

Ike: Really? How is he? Has he said anything-

Doctor: Yes, he said "Tell the priest to fuck off, I'm not dead yet."

Soren, hoarse: I lost my voice. 

Ike: Well, that’s good. that means you can’t insult kings yell at me anymore!

*The next day*

Ike: So apparently, Soren's scarier when he’s quiet.

Ike: *Being Ike*

Soren: You better shut the fuck up before I look at you one day, feel warm and realize I've fallen in love with you.

Ike: Wait wh-

Soren: I'm serious, quit it! FUCK!

Ricken: Olivia, can I talk to you for a second?

Olivia: Yeah, what’s up-? Lemme guess. You have a crush on Henry and you want me to teach you how to kiss?

Ricken: What? No, stop that. I know how to kiss. I’ve read books.

Ricken: What time is it?

Henry: I don’t know; pass me that saxophone and we’ll find out

Henry: *Plays sax loudly and extremely out of tune*

Lon'qu: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT TWO IN THE MORNING

Henry: It’s 2 am

Some dude: We have your son.

Basilio: I don't have a so-

Basilio: Oh wait. You have Lon'qu. Lmao good luck with that.

Five minutes later: PLEASE TAKE HIM BACK-

` I'm bed, bath and beyond disappointed in you. ` Gaius, after Laurent pulled another all-nighter

[sroloc--elbisivni]

A modern Voltaire....

[image text: the first image is part of a book page reading: but Casanova’s comic anecdote does reflect a common notion that sex could also be an intellectual adventure. Voltaire is said to have conducted a similar experiment with an Englishman at the court of Frederick the Great. A few days later, the Englishman told him that he had repeated the experiment, to which Voltaire replied: “Once, a philosopher; twice, a sodomite.” second image is a tweet from @ scraftpunk reading: if an individuaal has never tried broccoli, and another has tried it once, and both say “I do not like broccoli,” who has the more valid claim? in this essay, i’ll explain why it is more straight to fuck a dude in the ass once, than not at all.]

[mallorykeen]

get down on your hands and knees and pray

Magnus walked into the funeral home, leaving Hearth to stand guard outside. 

He forced himself inside, determined to find the stupid sword before any handsome firey lord dudes with excellent fashion taste did and was so focused that he didn’t notice that there were people inside, like at a funeral. 

His funeral. 

Fuck.

His entrance had now made everyone stare at him as if he was a ghost - which to them, he supposed, he was - all the remaining Chases were there, sans Frederick’s wife and his other children. 

Annabeth had now gotten to her feet and was running over. Whether to embrace him or tackle him, Magnus didn’t know but he stayed there, feet frozen to the floor, immobile. 

“Magnus? Magnus! How - I knew you weren’t dead! I knew it.”

And now he was getting hugged. Great. 

“I am dead, what are you talking about, my body’s right there, I’m just a glamour, a ghost thing to trick you. I’m not real, this is a figment of your imagination. Now if you could help me find the sword and-” 

Where the hell had Annabeth gotten a sword? A bone one too. Who the fuck owned swords nowadays unless they were medieval recrationists or- or demigods. 

He could get and/or give an explanation later. Right now he had a sword to retrieve. 

Dodging the blade at his throat, somehow, he ran over to the body and flipped it over. No sword. 

Great. Another dead end. 

“What the fuck’s going on?” And Frederick had noticed at last. “Magnus? What? I don’t understand.”

He glanced around. There was a window he could break behind the coffin. He certainly didn’t want to go near Annabeth at that moment, she looked way too scary, guarding the door, waiting for him to make an attempt at escape. Every second he lingered was a second Annabeth could tackle him in. He was under no illusions that she could easily kick his ass, even with his einherji powers. 

Randolph could foot the bill for this one. He hurdled his casket, kicking it onto the floor, making the other him fall out in a way that was truly grotesque, and smashed through the window, feet first, landing outside in the alley before running into the crowd. 

He could find Hearth later and deal with Annabeth once he had the stupid world ending sword. 

Time to make a run for it

[plush-anon]

after many hours spent pausing the show bc good lord why did they do that, i have now finished Love Never Dies

annnnnd yikes 😬😬😬

I’ll start with the few positives I did enjoy from the recorded Australian production on Youtube:

1.) the camera work. This is the kind of thing I dream of for professionally recorded shows - it really allows for some lovely close-up shots of how the emotions play over their faces, it’s lush

2.) the costumes are well-crafted, and I desperately Want the Phantom’s long-ass swooshy trenchcoat cape thing he wore for the first half-hour 

3.) the sets used throughout this are honestly very impressively used and put together for some really fantastic shots

4.) the opening, with ‘Til’ I Hear You Sing Once More’. This song is honestly very lovely, and really articulates the Phantom’s loss and heartache for Christine. It’s sung very earnestly, and had the rest of the show been more like this I might have liked it more. 

5.) the Fucking Song, ‘Beneath a Moonless Sky’, is a guilty pleasure. It’s so over the top, and it is only about recounting that One Time they totally banged yo, and I love it. I think it’s the orchestration, but it’s also enjoyably silly even while it takes itself 100% serious. 

6.) As much as I hate to say this? ‘Devil Take the Hindmost’. While I hate the gist of the song - that being Raoul and Erik betting on who Christine will choose, and pretty much deciding for her who will get to be her one true love forever, completely negating the entire point of the OF musical where her choice was the most important factor for all of them - the pacing and the lyrics as they dance around each other are absolutely fantastic. It’s kind of sad to say, but Raoul and the Phantom, in this scene alone, display more chemistry in their singing than they do with anyone else. Let the hatefcuking commence~

7.) Some parts of ‘The Beauty Underneath’ I enjoy, particularly the ending scene where the Phantom is trying to talk Meg down. It’s very slow, melodic, and shows his more manipulative side, as well as how he can crawl into someone’s head, I love it. 

8.) This very interesting visual with a mirror in Christine’s dressing room. There are two separate scenes where someone is in the mirror singing. The first is the Phantom, between Raoul and Christine. The second is Raoul between the Phantom and Christine. It’s honestly a nice touch.

9.) The main three are excellent singers. 

 Unfortunately, that’s all on the list of what I liked. Everything else is a Giant Fcuking Mess. 

1.) The Phantom is no longer a complex, messed-up, but still somewhat sympathetic character, no; this is just a giant asshole who takes everyone for granted and barely realizes that anyone else exists except Christine, and even then only really as his personal instrument. 

He never actually apologizes to Christine for the shit he’s put her through and continues to put her through, but still demands obedience and forgiveness and understanding. It completely negates the entire point of POTO’s ending, where he actually realizes he’s done wrong by her and his actions pertaining her, and lets her go from his world entirely, and RESPECTING HER CHOICES AND LEAVING HER ALONE. 

Not to mention This Bitch also threatens to kidnap/possible “lose” her child if she doesn’t sing for him, keeps pushing her around and telling her what to do, and manipulating her life to change her decisions for her. 

AND HE’S FRAMED AS THE BETTER OPTION HERE

2.) Which reminds of me of the next big asshat: Raoul de Chagny, who has now become an alcoholic gambler who pushes his wife to do things she’s not comfortable doing to repay his debts, neglects his son entirely, and also is abrasive and controlling of Christine, to the point he yanks her back and forth on doing shit. Play this role! We should leave bc he was an asshole! No now we should leave bc Phantom is back! No take the role he’s paying triple! I’ll make a bet on whether she loves me to pay my debts! No wait you should quit ten minutes before you go on-stage bc I don’t want to lose you! MAKE UP YOUR GODDAMN MIND YOU MISERABLE PISSANT SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

Like I can understand being overprotective to a certain degree, which could eventually morph into being controlling. But neglecting your son, your wife, drinking and gambling your fortune away? ALL of that?!? Really???

Shouldn’t he be desperate to keep his wife and son close to him at all times after the events of POTO? Never leave, never go anywhere, only do what’s safe? You COULD have set this up as a continuation of Safety versus Freedom with Raoul and the Phantom, show the good and bad of both and have her choose from there. Show the dichotomies and hypocrisies of both men’s standards. 

But nope! We’re just totes gonna make the husband like this for no goddamn reason, especially since Raoul doesn’t start suspecting that Gustave (his son) isn’t really his until Devil Take the Hindmost. He’s just that much of an idiot!

3.) The presence of Madame Giry and Meg Giry. Oh gods, where to even begin? They’re pretty much only here so that Sir Andy doesn’t have to make new characters with different backstories and motivations and introduce them accordingly. Nope! Now both women are blaming Christine for leaving the Phantom Man-Baby, and talking about everything they sacrificed to help him make his stupid-ass circus, and talking about how they love him and GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH Madame Giry in the POTO musical YOU LED RAOUL DIRECTLY TO THE PHANTOM’S LAIR SO HE COULD RESCUE CHRISTINE WHY ARE YOU COMPLAINING ABOUT HOW SHE BETRAYED HIM

And, oh, Meg... she reaaaaaaaaaaaaally got the short end of the stick here. I just... poor dear, she was horribly treated in this. 

Neither of them deserved to be like this, honestly. 

4.) Christine, to a lesser extent. Experienced Literal Character Assassination, forced to choose between two horrible options, stripped of her agency entirely, used as a bet in a game between said two horrible options, lied to and dragged around constantly, should have taken Gustave and run off with Meg to run a music store together. Fcuk you Sir Andy, for using POTO characters to act out your bitterness and frustration at your ex. 

5.) The entirety of the whole Boardwalk Circus schtick, spawning an additional Fuck You to Frederick Forsythe, who thought this was a tenable option for the story to progress. 

6.) The Phantom’s deformity was literally just four lines drawn onto his face with crayon and some smeared lipstick:

what even the fcuk, you couldn’t make the make-up crayon drawing more detailed??? take more than ten minutes to draw it on???

I never thought I would say this, but even the 2004 film’s depiction was better than this! At least that one partially drew from a real medical condition, Sturge-Weber Syndrome. What the fcuk is your excuse LND?!?

7.)  The Lyrics. Oh gods, the lyrics. Some songs were decent, mostly the ones I listed up top. But the rest? Did someone forget to give the writer a more advanced/creative guide to rhyming lyrics? I wrote better shit in middle school than Glenn Slater did for the majority of these lyrics. 

Glenn my dude, what the fcuk is this nonsense? You’ve written good shit like the Tangled songs and stuff for Galavant! Why are you writing worse than an angst-ridden middle schooler? It is immensely frustrating, to say the least. 

8.) The really WEIRD direction in acting. No one here acts like they know how to move their arms or hands naturally; there’s a lot of really odd and unnecessary gesturing that makes it look like everyone has just had their limbs replaced with faulty robotic arms. There’s also a lot of leaning the characters do, with their arms perfectly straight by their side and it just looks wrong. 

9.) The Phantom’s pseudonym is Mr. Y. No, they never explain why it is he chose that particular moniker. 

10.) Bathing Beauty. Just... all of it, here, tied to POTO, present and here. 

11.) It’s been exactly 10 years since Christine saw/banged the Phantom, and her son is precisely 10 years old. 

That’s... not how pregnancy works. At all. 

12.) This weird scene with the American press, where they are absolutely obsessed with Christine, despite the facts they present, such as:

- She hasn’t performed in 10 years anywhere. 

- She was a French performer, and

- She only starred in three operas at the Populaire (Hannibal, Il Muto, and Don Juan Triumphant, which wasn’t even finished. So technically 2.2 operas that we know of). 

Why, precisely, would American reporters be so obsessed with her upon hearing she’s coming? I could see some interest given the whole shebang with the Phantom, but after 10 years of radio silence, would she really garner an entire crowd of reporters and photographers... in America, no less? 

France I could definitely see. America? Not so much. 

13.) Gustave is a flat, generic kid character, who apparently is totes the Phantom’s son because... he can play the piano well. And also has the same ideas of music as the Phantom, despite never being taught about them, or discussed such things with his mother. 

Is musical talent only inherited through the father’s side of the family in this universe? I mean, we never learn about Christine’s mother, just her famous violinist father. Otherwise, why is it Gustave’s musical talent isn’t attributed to - oh, I don’t know - HIS FAMOUS OPERA SINGER MOTHER?!?

14.) Apparently the Phantom is also now the one who invented cars OH I MEAN “horseless carriages” 🙄 A carriage with no engine and a “ghost horse” appears, and everyone is just fcuking stunned by this, like they’ve never seen a vehicle move without a horse before. In 1907. 22 years after the first functional automobile was invented. Ugh. 

15.) seriously tho who thought basing a sequel on the Frederick Forsythe novel was a good idea why did nobody think to stop him apart from Sir Andy’s pet cat Otto. why.

16) The Phantom’s interactions with Gustave are distinctly creepy and unsettling. I keep getting pedo vibes from him and I Do Not Like It.

17.) The death scene at the end is so goddamn over-the-top and out of nowhere I just want to throw something, ugh

18.) And finally, my last gripe with this mess: This takes place in 1907, and declares that it’s ten years after the original musical. Despite the fact that the OG took place in 1885. Yippy skippy. 😑

I can honestly say I am Not a Fan of this musical as a whole, mostly based on the plot and the character assassinations (one quite literal) and the poor lyrics. I can admire the camera work, the basic singing ability, the scenery and costumes, and maybe two or three songs. But I just do not enjoy it. It took me two days to finish watching it because I kept cringing from what shit kept happening, and had to walk around and listen to other shit to get it out of my head. 

HOWEVER: People do enjoy this one on the sake of it being so bad and over-the-top, and I can honestly see the whys. It helps that most of the cast can sing, and the orchestration is done well. There’s a TON of stupid to mock, and a lot of over-the-top awkwardness to laugh at. This is a good one to watch and mock with friends, IMO. 

For those of you who do enjoy it, I’m afraid I have to disagree on most of it. Still, it is nice being able to watch this one for free, even if it is a giant hot mess.

And that’s all for me on this one! Have a good week guys!

[the-molecularbio-kitten]

Just a random thought that’s been bothering me. As I come up with more ideas for future fanfics, I keep coming back one of my top OTPs of fe awakening, and first lemme say that Frederick/Sumia is like, the CUTEST of her supports. Second, I don’t care what the fucking people who made it say, there’s absolutely no way I consider Chrom/Sumia canon. Number one, and this is just a minor thing/personal opinion, but why, if Chrom/Sumia is canon would they make their supports SO unappealing? It’s just... not cute, and boring. SECOND, and this is the biggest thing, if Chrom/Sumia was canon, why would Cynthia join the bandit group she joined, thinking the boss dude was Chrom? She calls the boss bandit “father” if Chrom is her dad, and she’s not Morgan so she doesn’t have amnesia, and I can’t accept that she’s just that fucking dumb that she can’t recognize her own father. No, in my opinion that is the biggest (probably only) legitimate proof that Chrom/Sumia is NOT canon