#fucking default one guys come on... leave them be

[viktormaru]

as a lover of games that are hell and make u feel pain and suffering i often think abt the topic of the last post i reblogged

like... i remember seeing a guy posting on reddit like "hey, im enjoying dark souls a lot rn but i have kids and a job and dont have as much time to learn it as id like and i'm stuck at this part, does anyone know any ways to cheat or make my characters stronger so I can finish the game" and a bunch of gamer dudes just replied with a bunch of inspirational quotes about learning from defeat and never giving up but its like... dudes... the guy already got the gist of the game... he understands the philosophy he just doesnt have the time.... give him the fucking cheat so he can see the rest.... like damn!!! damn!!!

that guy is not gonna be like "oh dark souls is boring bcs its too easy i never die to anything" he knows already!!! he knows hes cheating!! its fine!!! he can still enjoy the world and the boss designs and stuff in a way.

As long as you're aware youre missing stuff by using easy mode or walkthroughs or hacks or savescumming in sigle player games... youre totally fine doing so!!!!!!! you PAID FOR HTE GAME ALREADY!!!! you can enjoy it however you want man... guiltless, just do ur thing, have fun. be free.

[ettawrites]

Could you make genin Naruto, Sasuke, Gaara, Rock Lee and Neji x reader who is their crush and they end up having to fight reader in the chunin exam?

Yessss, yes I will 😊

Fighting Them During The Chunin Exam

A/N: half of this was written with writers blocks the other half was written when I was high, so don’t judge the quality okay 😊

Naruto

- One by one you both watched as everyone was drawn. When it was just down to four of you, Naruto prayed he would get Kiba

- You both gave a side eye when you were the last opponents

- Oh fucking shit

- He was actually a bit (really) mad, protesting that he could not fight you because you were a friend but when the only response was fight or surrender he bit the inside of his cheek

- “Friend”… yuh uh, he means totally smitten to the point he feels like a dog

- But he couldn’t surrender, not when he was this close to getting his chunin but he didn’t know where you guys would stand after it

- When you reassured him this is just how it was supposed to be and said you’d be honoured to fight him, he only frowned and scratched his head.

There he stood, across from you on this dirty cement floor and he was mesmerized on how you could just smile.

“This gotta be a joke, can you just redraw?” He asked the , displeased evident.

“There’s nobody to draw from, you both are the last opponents,” he irked, finding Naruto’s stupidly uncharming.

“Naruto it’s fine, let’s just do this, I’m hungry,” You slumpt, anxious to get this over with.

- he went easy at the start, only throwing kunais and he played defence

- When he realized you weren’t going easy, he was caught off guard as you punched him right in the face

- He stumbled, looking at you with somehow even more admiration

- Then he got serious and the fight really started

- You lost, but some part of you kind of anticipated it

- You were sprawled out on the floor, head pounding from the attack and you were honestly just so tired from the forest

- When you surrendered he felt relieved, he didn’t know how much longer he could take fighting you

- He ran over to you, he wasn’t happy with the win

- He apologized over and over, helping you up and taking you to the infirmary

- He was so glad you guys were still friends, you meant so much to him

- Totally just friends

- He takes you out for ramen after

- He still is on edge for quite some time, he makes excuses why he can’t train with you and he definitely won’t rough house like you guys use too

——

Sasuke

- king of looking like he doesn’t give a shit

- He does

- He’s literally panicking internally and in private probably bites his nails from anxiety

- He thinks he’s anxious to fight you, that has to be it? Out of everyone you are most worthy to him potential wise

- He’s lying to himself, he doesn’t wanna believe that he’s scared to fight you because you mean a lot to him

- He’ll avoid you for the month of training and when you come to confront him about it he’s eerily upset

“We’re not friends, I am getting my chunen license even if it means hurting you,” he says, stopped inside his door frame as he watches you fold your arms over your chest.

“So that’s it, friendship over because of a silly competition?” You respond, you knew sasuke was aloof and stubborn, but really?

“We never were friends,” he replied, as casual as one could and he hated the way your eyes got glossy. He watched you leave, regretting it but he won’t take it back.

- you were nervous, standing in the podium as the crowd was watching you

- Sasuke wasn’t here yet, which you’d hope he wouldn’t show up at all

- You were a bit annoyed as he spawned in with kakashi, trying to be ‘cool’

- He was surprised when you actually put up a fight, a good one too

- But also kind of proud

- He did not go easy on you, at all and was definitely being yelled at by Naruto on the stands

- he won, by default as you had passed out and could not continue to fight

- He wanted to check on you, instead lurking outside your door and kinda of just shuffling around

- He’ll ask the nurses if you’re okay, but he won’t dare go in already knowing he’s fucked up your guys friendship

——

Gaara

- low key you were shitting your pants cause WHATT???

- You saw what that boy did to Rock Lee, and now you have to fight him?

- He on the other hand doesn’t care, but the more it gets closer to the fight he starts feeling uneasy

- He’s… what they refer to as a monster? So why is he kind of concerned for this nobody wannabe?

- He had sat beside you during the first test, intrigued by you

- Your the first person that has ever smiled at him so.. genuinely

- And now he has to fight you? A big part of him was set on absolutely destroying you to stop this uneasiness in his chest

- I mean, he didn’t even know if he had a gentle bone in his body, all he knows how to do is ruin things

“You…” his cold voice came, you were walking home in the dusk from the ramen shop after hanging out with Naruto.

“Uh.. yeah? Hey?” You responded, confused and a bit anxious as you stuffed your hands in your pockets. He came closer, a blank look on his face.

“Forfeit,”

“Huh?”

“Forfeit the fight, I will kill you,” He explained, blinking so casually as he watched your complexed reaction.

- he, in his own scary way, was trying to warn you that he could not control himself

- He was kind of happy when you got his underlying message.. you really were different

- You forfeited privately, to your sensei who completely understood

- Gaara was grateful when the next night Baki had told him his opponent had changed

——

Rock Lee

- When you were paired with him for the semi finals he had frowned

- He apologized to Neji and his sensei

- Both were very confused

- He had that cute little ‘hmpf’ look on his face with an even cuter pout as he walked down the steps

- When he came face to face to you you saw this look in his eyes

- Both of you didn’t say anything when the ref asked if anyone wanted to forfeit before he called fight

You braced, drawing your Kunai when the fight began. Rock Lee raised his hand, looking like his traditional taijustu pose.

“I cannot fight you (y/n)! Please forgive me I forfeit,” he yelled, clasping his hands together and falling to his knees before you in a bow.

“…wha…?” You deadpanned, uneased by how loud he had just shouted that. He looked up, seriousness written all over him.

- You guys didn’t talk until after everyone had battled, finding him hiding from you behind the tree outside

- He slumped as you yelled at him

- He let you rant before he started his own ramble, explaining how he couldn’t fight you

- He would never lay a hand on you, it was against his ninja way

- His eyes started to water and his top lip twitched, clearly upset

- You rolled your eyes and went to go get ice cream with him

——

Neji

- you guys were paired to fight for the finals

- He was stubborn and if you’re a girl.. low key sexist about it

- He thinks he’s being a gentlemen but absolutely obliterating you with ‘facts’

- King of backhanded compliments

- But what he doesn’t know is you started to train with a really powerful sensei who was travelling through the village and offered to help you

- Throughout the whole month training time he was focusing on his fighting, but you were on the back of his mind

- He knew he wanted to win, but he also knew he didn’t want to hurt you either nor ruin your relationship

- So he spent a lot of late nights trying to figure out ways he could knock you out as quick and painless as possible

- This was all internally and completely private to him, he never expressed any weakness on the outside

- He was pretty confident in himself

- When the fight began and he realized.. you were actually catching him off guard he was perplexed

“I don’t-… how?” He coughed up blood, knees weak as he swayed to try and stay up right. You frowned, he hated that.

“I’m not weak Neji, don’t underestimate your opponent. You don’t know me,” Those words were said in order to hurt him, he had ruined your patience with his opinion of you.

“I.. thought I did,” he pondered, eyes lost.

- you gave the final blow to him and he was carried away to infirmary

- When he awoke he stared up at the ceiling for a long time after, feeling his wounds and thinking he deserved the pain for how much he took your abilities unseriously

- He vowed to never make you feel inferior to him and started to rekindle your friendship in hopes he didn’t ruin his chance

——

[hitlikehammers]

Rockstar!Eddie Leaves What He Had With Steve Behind in Hawkins 💔 to Chase His Dreams 🎸

(so why is it that he’s back in Steve’s bed Hawkins every couple months for ‘very pressing reasons’ that are straining Steve’s heart honestly anything but? 🫤❤️‍🩹🥺)

NOTE: this was originally a fill from @eddiemunsonbingo AGES ago, and I’m only bringing it over here NOW because something for the @steddielovemonth is going to be posted soon that is a standalone in its universe, but also very much a sequel to it ♥️

Steve really does try not to think about it in terms of…time.

Maybe that’s foolish. It’s mostly denial. Lots of it isn’t reliable anyway: the score his body keeps isn’t accurate, war-time left over from too many near-misses with a fucking alternate dimension but the popping in his joints and the ringing in his ears and the white hair he pulled out of his scalp and stared blankly at in the sink for a good twenty minutes: those are real things, but they don’t chart the passage of days, of hours, months and fucking years with any real meaning.

It’s been four years. Roughly. Depending on what the start point is. Whether it’s that Spring Break. Whether it’s the first winter. Or the spring after, when Robin begged him to go with her—there’s still time. She still begs, because they still talk given the thread inside them stays tied unbreakable to one another, oblivious to miles between. Maybe it’s measuring from the graduations, the kids—only Erica’s left at Hawkins High, now, though Steve gets calls from the whole bunch of them, Eleven the most, which was maybe surprising, then it’s a good split between Dustin and Will, another surprise. Max calls enough but her calls are calls, with a weight most of the others lack. Lucas’s calls aren’t super frequent but always long, mostly because he talks around the point forever, whatever the point happens to be. Even Mike usually ends up on the other end of the line once a month. It’s…that could be where the time starts from.

Or it could be the summer, that first summer. The one that taught Steve what it was to have a heart just to fucking break it.

Could be that. Impossible to say.

(It’s been 3 years, 7 months, and 14 days. Steve had only counted in retrospect, in the wreckage left behind, because while he’d known there was a deadline in it, to it all, he’d thought he could be enough. That he could change a mind. He’d thought…

Foolish things. Bullshit. Didn’t matter. Could be any fucking date.)

But since the point's come up, and it’s front of Steve’s mind, his least favorite (most favorite) place to find it: he hadn’t expected it. Robin liked to say she saw the signs but. Steve hadn’t watched it happen in slow motion because there wasn’t a single goddamn slow thing about it. Which was…for whatever it was worth, Steve knew falling fast and hard and with everything he was had maybe failed him every time, thus far, but at least he knows that for him?

That means it’s real. He’s all in. He might not be met equal on the other side of the equation—hadn’t been yet, maybe wouldn’t be ever, but he wasn’t having any luck trying to fucking change that fact so, learning to work with what he had was the best he could do. And he had love. He’d never been able to name it to himself so far: not before, and certainly never since. But.

Figuring out the sexuality thing had been a not-bathroom-but-definitely-floor talk on the shitty Family Video carpet sometime around November of ‘85. Slow days, idle comments, and Robin’s suspiciously-but-reliably-gentle-when-the-need-was-dire hand to his shoulder to say no, no: actually wanting to kiss people of any gender wasn’t really…the default Steve had always expected it had to be. How could anyone look at, say, Harrison Ford and not think, oh yeah, I would at least suck his face?

Turned out probably at least half the people on the planet. As in the straight guys and the lesbians. Steve had spent the majority of three days on that disgusting fucking carpet, open to close, popping up to ask Robin if she was sure because what about—

She was sure. And eventually, through a couple of needs for deep breathing and a handful of assurances that it was okay to cry—he appreciated that, but he kept the crying to his room after these long-ass shifts and if Robin stayed for some of those times, that was because she was half his head, half his heart, and she knew what he was going to do sometimes before he did.

They did end up on the floor of his bathroom, a clean one for once, at one point. Maybe because they both held to tradition. Maybe because Steve had largely come to terms with the mindfuck of yet another piece of his world, his self unravelling and rewriting itself, and thought the vodka in his dad’s liquor cabinet was a good way to celebrate. The label was entirely in Russian and Robin had been practicing on hers, said she was pretty sure it was the good shit.

Sometimes you can drink enough of the best shit on an empty stomach, though, and still spew the whole of it up.

Steve sometimes does think he drinks his dad’s best liquor that way on purpose, though. Delightful going down and yeah, it sucks to chuck it up but. The idea that it’s ultimately wasted feels…right.

Anyway: Steve had settled with it all by New Year's, and while he’d hosted the rugrats who could only blabber about their latest campaign with their epic DM, and he’d kissed Robin when the clock turned, well. It felt like a new start, a fresh page.

Something that had the chance at being a good thing.

And nothing much happened in the two-and-a-half-months that followed save for finally catching a glimpse of the D&D god who ran their little club while he was idling in his car to pick up the shitheads, this legendary DM who did not make Steve jealous one tiny bit and who was cool and was edgy and was so fuckin’ cool, Steve, did we tell you got cool he is?! and Steve had said language as monotone as he could before he squinted as out came all the metal and the ink and he’d said your club president dude is Eddie goddamn Munson and he should have kept his mouth shut because the amount of talking that ensued left him with a headache the size of Montana; but.

That was really all that happened until about…mid-March.

Then Spring Break happened.

It could be argued Eddie and Steve grew close enough to pass the acquaintances benchmark, ended up as at least tentative friends on top of necessary battle mates as early as the Upside Down. Whatever reason Eddie gave, he jumped in after Steve. Whatever speech Steve landed on, he didn’t want Dustin orEddie hurt.

It could be argued Steve wasn’t paying attention and didn’t stop in time and landed in the land of Tentative Friends You Wouldn’t Mind Added Benefits With after the…at least after the way Eddie leaned in close and his lips we so red and he called Steve big boy and…

Yeah.

When Steve carries what may or may not be Eddie’s still fucking corpse out of the Upside Down—he can’t tell, every time he tries to check again his own heart's too loud, his own breaths too shaky—but by then, they’re family. Bound in blood. Steve would die for him, like the others. He won’t let him die, if he can fucking help it.

Between him and Max, Steve almost crashes, breaks. Steve’s there when Max’s fingers twitch and he laughs with tears in his eyes and hands over hands and tells her he loves her and he’s sorry and he’s there, tries to talk around the letter he opened and resealed without evidence because Steve knows some tricks too, okay, and her words had broken him but now he could live up to what she thought she was leaving behind, could make sure she had every goddamn thing she thought she was giving up in spades, to roll around in in abundance. He was going to take care of her, whatever she needed. Whatever it took.

Her lips had quirked and the doctors called coincidence, don’t get your hopes up but; Steve knew Max. That was all her.

And there were more tears, he let her fucking feel them; he fucking hoped she’d notice, and remember, and give him so much shit.

Eddie takes longer, pulls out of the woods enough to exhale a few days later, and the way Steve slips out to find the hospital chapel, the only goddamn place he won’t be found by anyone he knows, and bawls his goddamn eyes out?

It’s family, and it’s love because it’s family but…it’s been so quick. It’s been intense, and that probably speeds it along but…

Shit. Shit.

That’s when Steve knows he sets a new goddamn record for himself and falls hard and heavy and stupidin, like, a week and change. Jesus Christ.

It’s in the recovery that they build something though. Something that’s not trauma or terror or the threat of imminent death. Steve spends most of his hours between two hospital rooms listening to progress reports and taking notes and the kids gravitate toward Max—Dustin would have been the outlier but Steve knows he’s not ready, and so he gives his own updates just to his brother when he drives him home after visiting hours—but that means Steve’s Eddie’s most common conversation partner. They talk about bullshit. Steve defends a-ha to the last breath he has. Eddie’s rendered speechless for a second and then frantic when challenged to pick his favorite band. Again when it’s his favorite song, from his favorite band. And again when it’s his favorite song of any song, ever at all. Steve's heart swells in the watching. He’s foolish enough to bask in the glittering of Eddie’s eyes when Steve indulges in talking, scene by scene as guided by the master in the bed beside him, about what his opinions on Star Wars really were. And then guided by no one, just invited to share what his opinions are on the last movie he saw and loved: which was Weird Science, the last movie he watched in a theatre because he and Robin had gone to face their fear or some shit after Starcourt and it was easier than he’d expected. Eddie listens, and nods, and asks if they can rent it when he’s out, before making sure to add  but you should really have a new choice like, eight months later, man, you work at a video store.

Steve was mostly just focused on Eddie more than implying, of his own volition, that he wanted to have a movie night.

Eddie’s released before Max, largely for mobility reasons, so they both go to visit her now. Robin’s put on the night shift when they schedule their movie night and Steve immediately moves to reschedule but she says no, she’s seen it, make Eddie suffer this time. So it’s just them.

They sit closer than they have to, on the couch.

And it’s little things that build from there. Max’s physical therapy is a government secret, like some fancy space-age protocol that has real hopes to put her on her feet again so she needs a ride, and while they could take turns, Steve and Eddie just take turns as to which vehicle they hop into to drive her. They stay when she needs them—not when she asks because she’s Max and she never asks—but it ends up three days a week back and forth and during: together.

And a lot of nights, for a movie or a smoke or a nightmare or a pulled stitch before they’re all taken out: together.

And shifts where Steve doesn’t even bother to bring his own lunch because Eddie Munson, unpredictable and wholly forgetful super-super senior—who Nancy and Hopper and most of all Joyce convinced the School would be finishing his final senior year at home save for tests, and only that once he was cleared by his doctors—that Eddie Munson brought Steve something every single time he worked. A burger, a chili dog, chicken fucking nuggets. A PB&J clearly homemade and cut diagonal.

So yeah. It starts out how it does when Steve’s in trouble. But it builds like…Steve’s never known before.

They kiss in May. Maybe so that it’s not their first, and a total cliche, when Steve kisses him for graduation behind the bleachers.

The sleep together after graduation, high on the thrill of it, and that’s maybe a cliche but Steve could not give a shit less.

And then they're EddieandSteve, only to find out they have been for a while; and this is just something a little deeper, a little bit more.

In ways that mean everything.

Looking back, Steve knows Eddie never minced words about his plan to leave Hawkins in the fall. With a mixtape and a prayer if I have to, Stevie-boy, he’d said once even, and Steve had laughed.

He’d fucking laughed.

So he’d known.

But July bleeds into August and Steve…Steve’s in love, okay, for real in a way that he’s never felt before. Right in a way he’s never felt before. He kinda just…overlooks it. Because Eddie seems to be at least on the same wavelength. Touches him first, reaches for him first: wants him. Looks at him with not just desire or attraction but…something no one’s ever looked at Steve with before.

And so he hopes. More than hopes.

But when Eddie starts packing, Steve can’t breathe.

He buys a set of luggage and goes home to start the same, has half of his not-excessive possessions shoved in when he realizes:

He’s not invited. Eddie’s never asked him to come.

Looking back, he’s afraid he wasted too much of those last weeks. Scared of giving too much away, the hurt from so many sides and the heartache that’s already taking root, but also: the way he clings, but tries not to make it obvious.

Fuck; but of course it was gonna be obvious, and how much energy did he waste, how many opportunities slipped by, because Steve was trying not to give away that Eddie leaving—to get away from a town that hated him, to try and make a real go with his music, to be anywhere without Steve so he could live out the dreams that predated Steve, that Steve had no place in—to try not to give away that all of it; it’d fucking destroy him.

Steve doesn’t know, to this day, how he stood and let Eddie kiss him breathless out the driver-side window, how he waved until Eddie was out of sight. He doesn’t know.

Kind of like he doesn’t know how he fucking keeps doing it.

Eddie throws tapes to every radio station with Van Halen or other top-played bands written on the insert in sharpie like that gives nothing away, and sneaks a demo in every underpaid delivery boy’s hands to record executives as he drives to the West Coast, sends Steve postcards what seems like has to be every goddamn day, filled up with his rambling until there’s no space left, has to draw lines around Steve’s address to make it clear where the damn thing’s going lest it get confused. Like they’re SteveandEddie still. Like only…only the things that changed after graduation are gone.

Steve sobs after about a month of it all, grateful and resentful, hateful and still so goddamn full of love it’s sickening. Literally, it makes him feel nauseous. He…

He keeps every postcard.

When one of them comes to say some idiot in San Francisco accidentally played Corroded Coffin on what’s apparently an important station, and Eddie got a letter in response from one of the labels, he says he’s coming back for the boys, they need to be ready. Steve knows he’s not one of the boys, but.

Eddie wouldn’t have told Steve he was coming if it wouldn’t matter to Steve. And maybe Eddie wasn’t in love with him anymore, maybe never was in love with him.

But he’d be lying if he said he thought Eddie didn’t love him. In a different way. A…you-don’t-get-to-come-with-me-but-I’d-still-want-to-see-you-when-I-stop-back kind of way.

And Steve…Steve’s not a fucking monk or anything. But even Robin doesn’t try to push him when he finally just tells her what he feels, lovesick and pathetic as it is:

I gave everything I had to someone else, and it’d be different if I wanted to back, to give again, but…I don’t.

I don’t want it back, not from him. Not if any part of him, wants to keep any part of it.

And because she’s Robin, she knows he means something else when he says ‘it’. And because she’s Robin? She’d push if she thought it was worth it.

She just holds him, and that’s really the best thing he could ask for.

But it becomes a thing. The boys go with Eddie, and they record new shit to impress...whoever. And they do. They come back for Halloween, because Eddie loves it. The label’s dragging its feet, but they’re not deterred, they’re energized. They come back for Thanksgiving because Wayne loves it—except he doesn’t, Steve knows that, Wayne actually hates trying to make a bird and Eddie had lamented more than once that they ended up with lunchmeat cut into cubes one year when Wayne was particularly frustrated with the process. They go out East, and try a few studios in New York. They come back for Christmas.

Eddie spends most of his time with Steve. Steve doesn’t fucking fight that; wants it…like…

There’s nothing to compare how he wants it to. Nothing exists that fits.

Eddie spends most of the time that he spends with Steve, though?

In Steve’s bed.

And here’s the thing: Steve had a decent amount of experience to compare to, but once they’d fallen into a rhythm, got past the awkward bits, the learning curve? Sex with Eddie had been a goddamn revelation. Not just because he was a man—after he’d left, Steve had forced himself to try, and dispelled that possibility quick as hell—and now?

Now, it’s like they never stopped. Every fucking time, it’s like they never stopped.

Steve’s not surprised in the slightest that he remembers every give and tell of Eddie’s body—of course he goddamn does—but that Eddie doesn’t miss a beat in touching, sucking, licking, worshippingSteve’s? That’s insane. That’s…

Unexpected. Every time it’s unexpected and every time Steve’s shown he wasn’t forgotten when he probably should have been. Eddie’s building a life that doesn’t include him.

He’ll only get in the way.

But Steve is selfish and stubborn and maybe it’s often, like almost strangely so, but it’s only a week or two at a go so he tells himself he’s allowed. He tells himself that it felt like making love in the beginning because Steve was in love, and that it still feels exactly the same because Steve…Steve never stopped.

Steve is still just as goddamn in love.

So yeah. Steve sleeps with Eddie and it’s like…it’s like rationed air. He gets a regular taste and he gets to keep breathing.

And it’s okay. Probably more then. Because he gets Eddie—even a little bit. Even just in scraps. When he has Eddie?

He has him, even for moments that were never made to last.

It’s Easter, this time. The band put out their first record in January. It’s doing really well. Eddie’s over the moon. Someone called about a magazine cover for a publication in Cleveland that’s apparently kind of a big deal, Alt..something. Steve will buy every copy in a fucking 100-mile radius. 200 miles. 500—

It’s Easter. Eddie didn’t lament not celebrating it after Spring Break in ‘86 but he’s back every year now. And if it’s just…come to mean something, or maybe did then and circumstances won out against it? Steve will be here. Steve will be comfort and a reprieve or a hot as hell romp with a familiar body, Steve will…

Yeah. Steve will do whatever’s needed. Wanted. Anything.

Pathetic.

But so much better than nothing.

Case in point: they’re both naked, sweat mostly dried, sharing a joint and it’s comfortable. It’s quiet and gentle and put up against sitting alone on a weeknight, not with Eddie?

It’s heaven.

“So when’s the dream happening?”

Steve looks cross-eyed toward his lips; he hasn’t smoked this thing long enough to have heard wrong. He squints up at Eddie, whose chest he’s laid out on, confused. Offers him the smoke but he waves it away.

“The dream?” Steve asks finally, when Eddie doesn’t seem to want to answer on his own.

Eddie looks at him weird. Not weird for its own sake but like: like he’s staring into him, and then like he’s disbelieving, but then also like he’s seeing him for the first time.

That kind of weird.

“Getting the fuck out of here,” Eddie answers like it’s obvious. “White picket fence. Little nuggets.” He spreads his hands as wide as possible without tossing Steve from where he lies. “See the sights.”

And Steve’s response is immediate. Doesn’t even require a thought.

He laughs. Like, ugly-laughs.

“Man,” he shakes his head as he catches his breath, and passes the joint off this time with purpose, not an offer or a choice as he snorts a little; “that’s not the dream.”

When Eddie doesn’t grab the smoke, Steve finally looks up. Eddie…

Eddie looks like what Steve’s always struggled to understand the word ‘poleaxed’ to mean. He thinks it might be this.

He looks…like something stuck him through the gut. Slapped him silly across the face.

“What d’ya mean?” And it’s just three words, one that’s a cheat, and he says it slow enough to take an age.

Steve breathes out, and then, if he’s gonna be honest, and if he has to keep holding the damn thing anyway, decides to take another drag before speaking:

“Figured out what the dream was, inside the dream,” Steve says, wondering if he’ll get away with the vagary; knowing he won’t.

“All we see or seem?” Eddie jokes a little, but it falls flat, his tone eerily kinda…strained but hollow.

“I like poetry.” Steve smiles up at him, soft, and offers the joint again straight to Eddie’s lips. He takes it this time.

“It was about family. It was about stability, not,” Steve shakes his head, stops talking half-assed around the lungful he’s holding, and lets it out slow; “not in a place, fuck, not in a house, but,” a person he doesn’t say, but he hears it in his head; “it was about sharing it.”

And that's it. That’s the simplest, most straightforward truth. Steve doesn’t think there’s anything complicated, or offensive in it. Hard to swallow. Even if he’s come to terms with it. Is mostly at peace with it.

Which is why it’s weird, that Eddie feels suddenly rigid beneath him.

So Steve turns, and braces his hand on Eddie's chest for balance, and frowns when he doesn’t even have to push down to feel the way his heart’s a fucking riot.

“What?” Steve asks, gentle; Eddie’s face is a portrait of conflict, of distress and Steve can’t fucking figure out why, they just came like four times between them and are sharing some very nice Cali weed—they’re nestled close, they’re together, it’s…

Eddie’s quiet, his breath disconcertingly steady for how his pulse pounds, and then he breathes out slow before covering his face:

“I don’t think I can fuck this up any worse than I already have, so,” he mutters, dejected for reasons Steve can’t even guess, then he laughs, humorless, shakes his head:

“Let me try, I guess.”

Steve frowns, uncomprehending, until:

“I’ve been in love with you forever.”

Steve thinks the world stops. His heart does, at least. Suspended. Silent so he doesn’t miss a syllable.

“And I told myself,” Eddie bites at his lip, worries at the bottom swell; “end of that summer, from the very first, I said: don’t ask him to come with you, even if it breaks your heart,” and oh god, oh god after all this time: Steve doesn’t think he’s projecting to hear the genuinely broken heart in those words for just remembering.

“Don’t ask him to settle, you’re not even in the same universe of what he wants,” fuck, what lies Eddie’s saying; did he believe them? Has he always—“what he needs.”

But Eddie is everything he needs, always was, will always be—

“You’ll never have the picket fence. You can’t give him his nuggets. You should never be trusted to park a Winnebago.”

They could have had a shitty studio apartment. They could have had the kids in college. They could have run the BMW until it died, or sold it to put toward a better van for equipment. They could have—

“You’re selfish, Munson, you’re a rat fucking bastard but,” Eddie’s still going, heart still hammering under Steve’s touch even as Eddie swallows hard and fails to smile, looks ill with the attempt like it hurts to try: “you love him too much for that.”

Oh. Oh god.

“It didn’t break my heart, though,” Eddie clears his throat and glances away, to the ceiling, eyes too bright: oh fuck; “broke my goddamn soul,” and a tear falls, and Steve can’t help but wipe it away, and kiss the track. Even just once.

So he does.

“When I saw you again that first time back,” Eddie starts again, voice rougher and shakier as he reaches a hand for Steve’s. “I could have asked the boys to fly out, the execs offered, but,” and this time, the attempt to grin is more successful, like a weight’s lifted from it: “and you smiled at me, it felt like,” and when he shakes his head this time it’s for disbelief, but the kind that comes with awe; “and when we slotted back together like we’d never been apart, it was…”

Eddie’s voice trails, but it cracks at the end—Steve doesn’t know which does more to stop his words.

He’s grateful, relieved, when they come back. He’s powerless but to give when Eddie touches his cheek so gentle and breathes:

“And I had to tell myself again, and again,” he murmurs, stroking Steve’s skin like he’s precious: “you love him too much to take his dream away from him.”

“What did it matter?” Steve can’t help but ask, no malice in it, just the need to understand. “You had your dream, you have—“

They have a contract. They have an album climbing the charts. They’re not just on their way—they’re there. The only next step is to get bigger, and bigger, and—

“Dreams within dreams, wasn’t it?” Eddie murmurs close to Steve’s cheek, where maybe he’s pressing to be close, or maybe he’s hiding a little, so Steve strokes his hair because he can either way and relishes how Eddie leans, melts into it like always. “Inside the dream?”

Steve nods, more to encourage more words. More Eddie.

“Break my dream open and there’s you with me, every step,” Eddie whispers, his lips warm on Steve’s skin. “Break my heart open, same damn thing,” and that causes Steve to shudder, and his heart to pick up now, too. “Both just kinda crumble if you take out the center.”

Steve can’t quite believe what he’s hearing. Wants to. Doesn’t think they’re lies. It’s just, he…

“Those,” Steve tries to speak but his voice cracks; he clears his throat and kicks his lips while he tucks Eddie into his neck, under his chin: “those would be good lyrics.”

“No,” Eddie shakes his head and nuzzles Steve’s throat with the motion and this can’t be happening.

This can’t be happening, can it?

“No, those words were only ever meant just for you.”

And Eddie kisses the pulse point close to his mouth and holds there, like a sentry and a miser, and holy shit.

Holy shit.

“And I don’t know,” Eddie’s saying more, but it’s pitchy, thready, like he’s barely holding the words together at all; “I don’t know if it’s nostalgia, or convenience, or routine,” his voice breaks again and the sob’s in the word when it comes even if it’s not streaming down on his cheeks: “pity,” and no, no, not fucking ever, how—

“I was never your dream then, and I don’t even know if I can be your inside-dream now, and,” Eddie’s rambling, and he does that when he’s desperate, when he’s overwhelmed and overfull with feeling—and Steve knows that. Steve knows that about him.

Steve knows. Better than he knows himself, Steve still knows him.

“I just want the world for you,” Eddie whispers, stroking up and down Steve’s jaw; “my sweetheart. My sunshine,” he smiles so real and soft and Steve melts, like the heart in his chest starts spilling through his ribs, warm and liquid: “you deserve more than the world, more than fuckin’ me and I,” Eddie shakes his head again, more this time like he’s stopping himself, like it’s a defense mechanism and Steve reaches for his cheeks, broad palms on either side to hold him still because…he doesn’t want Eddie to stop.

Ever.

“Did I ruin it?” Eddie breathes, and barely at that, eyes so wide and swimming and oh, god; “did I—"

And Steve can’t help it. He can’t help but kiss him with all he’s got, even if it couldn’t be all Eddie’s worth in all the world. Steve can’t contain all that Eddie’s worth.

But he can give everything, because this is the man who already has it.

“What the hell was I supposed to be to a rockstar?” Steve tries to talk through his own tight throat, his own growing smile, his own threat of tears bubbling close to the surface. “How the fuck was I ever going to measure up, ever do anything but hold you back when you could have—“

“I come back to you, for you,” Eddie answers immediate; it’s not what Steve’s asking but he won’t lie and say he didn’t want to know, at least a little. “The handful of times I’ve tried,” Eddie shakes his head once now, definitive; “I have always left my everything with you.”

The idea that Steve’s spent all this time feeling empty, and hollow, and missing the best of himself where it lived in the man he loved—the idea he was wrong, that they both were so fucking wrong is…insanity.

“I had a bag half packed.”

Steve doesn’t need to explain further. The noise Eddie makes is pure pain.

“Baby,” he nearly croons, falls into Steve somehow closer, wraps him up tighter; “I wanted to kidnap you in the night.”

“I sobbed in my bed after you were out of sight.”

“I pulled over before the town sign, because I couldn’t see the goddamn road.”

And Steve…Steve doesn’t really have a decision to make about what he says next. What dream he wants; always has.

“I never got rid of the luggage.”

And Eddie hears everything he says in those words, because after everything, Eddie Munson knows him, and…yeah.

Steve’s been kissed in a lot of ways before. By this man in particular, even.

But this: if leaving broke Eddie’s soul, if somehow the lack of Steve somehow did that?

This is…this is the body meeting another body, heart to heart and tasting the way a soul slides back in place. It's Eddie’s hands in his hair like hell never let go and he’s happy about the idea; blissful for it, even. It’s—beyond anything Steve’s ever known. So: yeah.

It’s not a decision. It’s just a fucking given.

♥️

🎸also on ao3

✨permanent tag list: OPEN (lmk if you want to be added/removed): @ajeff855 @askitwithflours @awkwardgravity1 @bookworm0690 @bumblebeecuttlefishes @captain--low @depressed-freak13 @dragoon-ze-great @dreamercec @dreamwatch @dreamy-jeans137 @estrellami-1 @goodolefashionedloverboi @grtwdsmwhr @gunsknivesandplaid @hiei-harringtonmunson @hbyrde36 @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @kimsnooks @live-laugh-love-dietrich @mensch-anthropos-human @nerdyglassescheeseychick @notaqueenakhaleesi @ollyxar @pearynice @perseus-notjackson @pretend-theres-a-name-here

divider credit here

[aerchivez]

idk if you take requests but if you do, can you do a little drabble where readers a biology student trying to study meanwhile sukunas trying to distract them

𐙚 annoying bugger : ryomen sukuna !

synopsis : midterms are coming up and you have been studying for way too long… ‘kuna feels neglected.

note : no ‘cuz i study so much too… where’s sukuna to distract me from all this ૮ ◞ ﻌ ◟ ა also, i’ll respond to requests as much as i can!

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘

“what the fuck are you reading and why are you not even looking at me.” your boyfriend never uses this tone on you. you only hear this when he’s talking to other people.

“the fuck you using that tone for?” irritated, you reciprocated sukuna’s disrespectful tone leaving him surprised. “damn, sorry baby. never gonna happen again, but seriously midterms isn’t until a couple months.”

he was kinda right and wrong, it’s never too soon to start preparing for midterms. biology is an absolute bitch, you have to fully understand how each component works, systems, reproduction, regulation, and all that jazz.

you were smart, but not the kind where it naturally just comes to you. you have to work hard to be able to do well and you do just that.

though he’s an engineering student, sukuna helps you study from time to time but his approach in studying is very different than yours. he’s a ‘i’ll just wing it’ kinda guy and to everyone’s surprise, he does!

“i’m having some difficulties evolutionary biology, i wanna do well for the exam ‘kuna.” you look absolutely devoid of life after studying for how many fuckass hours, trying to embed all the information in one go.

“okay, but i don’t think you should do all that shit at once. do it slowly?” sukuna stands up from your bed and went to your desk to give you a little kiss on the cheek.

“be more angry at me, i literally will not stop.”

“fuck’s wrong with you, i don’t think i can. not with you.”

“that’s bullshit you can do it!” why were you even having this conversation…

sukuna is a lot of things, especially a very angry man. he just can’t with you. he still talks to you with irate cadence in his voice, that’s just his default tone but he’s not actually mad. when he talks to his frat brothers though, he’s 70% of the time angry.

“i’ll help ya’ study if you have dinner with me, deal?”

“you seducing me or what?” you say with a giggle. “if that’s what it takes, then yes. get the fuck up, we’re doing that olive garden endless pasta shit.” your whole face lit up with pure joy, he knows you too well.

sukuna was laying down the bed the whole time you were getting ready. once you were finished you sit by his side and just stare at his face. lovingly, might you add.

“what’cha looking at? my face dirty?” you shook your head and gave him a quick smile as you near his face, smothering him with kisses all over.

“i’m not opposed ‘ta this but, you good?” he makes you laugh again, but he always does. a grumpy asshole to everyone, but he’s just your little baby gremlin!!

“yes, you annoying bugger.”

[lailols]

Kai’s Pretty Girlfriend [4]: Confusion?

OT5 x f!reader

Warnings: lots of kisses and a little dry humping <3

Ever since the game things have been pretty tense in the dorm. Well, maybe tense isn’t the right word but awkward? Not between you and Kai, never between you and Kai, but there’s definitely a difference in the way the guys treat you.

It’s not even spoken about and if you hadn’t known them all for so long, maybe you wouldn’t have realized. But you can tell. It’s almost as if when they’re with you they default to their ‘idol’ personalities.

You feel it when you visit the practice room to drop off food on a long day and while Kai greets you with a hug and a kiss, the guys simply thank you and disperse to eat.

You feel it when you’re watching anime with Soobin in the living room instead of his room and rather than you leaning against each other and borderline falling asleep on top of the other, he keeps a large distance between the two of you.

You feel it when you’re talking with Beomgyu and instead of having conversations that range from deep and intense to silly and random, he keeps it surface level before he makes an excuse to leave.

You feel it when you stay up late to make sure Taehyun eats when he makes it to the dorm after he stays to practice more, and he politely thanks you but tells you he already ate and then you wake up to him sneaking out of the room later to go eat.

You feel it when your messages with Yeonjun go from being filled with silly pictures, and videos of some new choreography he’s come up with to read messages and reactions rather than actual responses.

You especially feel it when you come into the dorm when Kai is out to wait for him to get back and sit in the living room to watch whatever’s on and everyone scatters suddenly having other things to do. Or when everyone starts eating out of the dorm instead of begging you to cook or ordering takeout. Or when… yeah, it’s been a lot.

It’s not hard for you and Kai to make a plan to corner the guys and address the tension that’s settled over you all. It took a bit of convincing from Kai because you’re, admittedly, feeling a little rejected. What else are you meant to feel when they go from having you in an intimate way to flat-out ignoring you?

It's a perfect reflection of the talk they gave you and Kai after the movie incident. You and Kai standing in front of them while they're sitting on the couch.

"You guys have been avoiding me."

"No, we haven't. We literally had dinner together yesterday." Beomgyu is right but the dinner was shrouded in silence with them leaving immediately after they finished eating.

"It wasn't the same as it used to be, and you know it." You take a breath before continuing. "Listen, if we... If I made you guys uncomfortable, I'm truly sorry. We don't have to do anything like that again, I just want us to be good again."

"There wasn't anything wrong with what we did. We're just... confused." Taehyun's words are accompanied by his brows furrowing as if he's trying to figure out the answer to a problem. You would probably consider it cute in another situation.

"Confused about what?"

"What you want from this. What you both want from this. Even if we didn't do much, you can't expect us to act as if nothing changed when something did."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Was it just a one-off thing? Are you guys experimenting or something? You went from begging us to leave the dorm for you to have alone time or doing things quietly to fucking in front of us and letting us participate. It's a big change and while we were okay with it, we don't want to push boundaries."

You expect Kai to answer, but he turns to you first.

"Well, I guess experimenting is the best way to put it.”

“So, Kai wants to watch us fuck you?”

“No!” Kai exclaims in answer to Beomgyu's question but then continues in a softer voice with red crawling up his face. “Well, maybe, at some point. But what I mean is, I don’t mind if you want to do that or anything really.”

“Anything like?”

“Anything that y/n is comfortable with. Actually, she should really lead this." All eyes turn to you.

"Um, like Kai said we're okay with me being more intimate with you all if you're okay with that."

“Why?” Taehyun asks, and, really, why does anyone do anything? You don't need to do this with them. You and Kai are as close to perfect as you can be. You shouldn't need to seek anything else, but you are. Is that so bad? Is it selfish? Probably. But you want it and you think they might want it too, so it can't be that bad.

"We don't really have a reason. Just a feeling and we wanted to try it out with you."

“So you guys have an open relationship?”

“No!” Both of you exclaim.

“No, not that there’s anything wrong with that but, ugh, I wouldn’t trust anyone else with y/n the way I do with you guys. So, maybe, but not with anyone else. If that makes sense.”

"It doesn't, but I think we get the gist. What do you want exactly from us?" Soobin asks, and though you've never seen him in the setting yourself, you imagine it's similar to when he's in meetings speaking on behalf of his members. Making sure he knows what's expected so he can make a decision that doesn't make the group fall apart. And, really, this is one of those decisions.

“I want us to be close like we were. And maybe more? It feels kind of selfish but you guys are all so good to me, why wouldn’t I want to be doted on by you?”

“So we get to have you?” Beomgyu's getting excited, shifting forward in his seat.

“Yes, if that’s okay with you all.”

“All of us?”

“Yes. Or no? If any of you don’t want to, you don’t have to, obviously, but I’m okay with it. With you. All of you.”

“Oh.” It’s quiet until the four form a circle and start playing rock, paper, scissors.

“Um…” you and Kai stare awkwardly at them. “What are you doing?”

“Seeing who gets to kiss you first, duh. Use that big brain of yours. Go ahead and prepare yourself.”

“Wait! I want to play, what the hell?!” Kai cries indignantly.

“You get to kiss her all the time, suck it up. Shit. Do you see what you caused?” Beomgyu is out.

“Fuuuuuuuck.” There goes Soobin.

It’s a war of nerves between Taehyun and Yeonjun. They don’t even notice Kai turning you to him and planting a kiss on your lips until a moan leaves you when he bites on your bottom lip.

“Hey! No! That’s cheating!” Beomgyu’s words startle Taehyun out of his thinking and Yeonjun ends up winning the round, jumping up and letting out a screech of victory before pulling you out of Kai’s arms.

“So, you come here often?” Yeonjun brings a hand out to tilt your head up at him with the other making a home on your waist.

You let out a giggle before playing along, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. “Sometimes, I haven’t seen you around before though.”

“Well, this may come as a surprise to you, but I do in fact live here.” He’s steadily closing the distance between your faces as he speaks.

“Are you sure?” You tilt your head up until your lips are barely touching. “I swear I would’ve remembered a face as pretty as yours.”

You cut off his screech of ‘you stole my line’ by pressing your lips to his. He freezes for a bit before relaxing and returning the kiss. His lips are soft and plump and taste faintly like a strawberry chapstick you're sure you lost a while back. He squeezes your waist once, twice, before rubbing his tongue gently against your lips to get you to open up for him, which you obviously do.

He pulls you impossibly closer to him and deepens the kiss before a different set of hands wraps around your body and pulls you away.

"Hey! Keep it in your pants, old man! We still haven't gotten to kiss her yet." Beomgyu is holding you against his chest as he shouts.

"I won! I can do whatever I want. It doesn't seem like y/n was complaining about it either!"

"Well, she couldn't with your tongue two miles down her throat," Taehyun interjects smoothly before taking your hand and pulling you away from Beomgyu. He gives you a soft smile before bringing a hand up to your face and caressing your cheek. "This okay?"

"Yes. It's okay, I'm okay." A bright smile rises on his face in response to your words and he brings your lips together in a short, but sweet kiss that leaves you wanting more. You can’t help but lean into him again. He smiles into your next kiss and his free hand moves down to your hip giving it a short squeeze before pulling away. This time he uses the grip he has on you to keep you separated but the look in his eyes is so warm that you don’t doubt you’ll find yourselves in a similar situation soon.

Taehyun has always been a bit reserved with his relationships, wanting them to be known but kept private. Though your situation isn’t anything like that, it makes sense he would want to fall into you away from the prying eyes. You look around for Soobin to see him still sitting on the couch.

“Yah! Choi Soobin don’t make her chase you!”

“I’m not! I just want her to be comfortable. Four first kisses is a lot in one night.”

“Thank you for wanting to make me comfortable, Bin.” You say as you slowly walk over to where he is on the couch, hesitating a bit before straddling his lap. “But I want to kiss you now, is that okay?”

“Yeah, yep. Totally! So okay with me it’s actually insane.” He finishes with a soft smile that is so cute, you can’t help but indulge yourself a little. Leaning down to press a short kiss to each of his dimples and nose before bringing your lips to his. He sighs softly and moves his hands up to your waist, drawing little circles with his thumbs.

You know that this is meant to be a small kiss, something of a marker of the new relationship you’re stepping into with the guys, but the implications of that new relationship are finally catching up with you. Maybe you should've pulled him off the couch to kiss him because this can quickly get out of control. Especially with the way he puts his all into the kiss. The way he’s not even trying to dominate the kiss but going with the flow whether that means you’re leading or him. You can’t help but shift your hips down to meet his. And, oh, the sounds that leave him after that make you want to drag him to your (Kai’s) room and see what other sounds he could make. But you forgot about the people watching.

“As hot as this is, I would like to kiss y/n before I turn fifty.” And with that, a familiar set of hands are wrapping around your waist in an attempt to pull you off Soobin. Too bad, Soobin doesn’t seem to want to let go. Just as you’re starting to wonder how far he’s willing to go with the others as an audience, he pulls away and presses a last peck to your lips before taking his hands off you.

“Hey, you.” Beimgyu says after wrapping your securely in his embrace.

“Hey.” You smile up at him.

“Ready for the best kiss of your life?” Kai lets out a prompt ‘Hey!’ at his words.

“You can try your best.” You challenge.

Rather than responding to your words, he just cradles your face and presses your lips together. It feels like something clicked into place in your mind. There's no doubt in your mind that there is nowhere else you should be than right here surrounded by these five men.

Beomgyu's thumbs rub back and forth across your cheeks as your lips move in tandem. Against your expectations, he does not try to deepen it more than this. He just kisses you as if he has all the time in the world.

When you pull away from Beomgyu, you look around to find five fond smiles turned towards you. You don’t really know where this is going to lead but you trust these men so fully that you know they’ll treat you right. You only hope your heart can handle it.

Step four is “completed”, yippie! I don’t really like this chapter so if you see it updated at some point, mind your business. >:(. If it’s unclear, you and Kai had a talk off-screen about what you wanted. Now we get into the member specific chapters! Guess which member goes with which description! Masterlist

[hgfictionwriter]

Teasing

Jessie Fleming x Reader

Summary: Jessie's not a particularly jealous person, but when it comes to you, well, things are different. You and Jessie are missing each other while Jessie's out with the team and you're at an event.

A/N / Warning: Inspiration finally struck again. The usual warnings still apply - smut, language, etc.. Hope you all enjoy! Oh, and I defaulted back to Jessie being with Chelsea. I'll switch over eventually!

gif credit to @glimmerofawesome

"How's your night going, beautiful?" Jessie blocked out the din of the bar she and the team were in as she sent you a text.

"It's fine. Missing you, wish you were here. How's your night?"

"It's okay. Pretty boring, but I've still gotta stay for a while longer. You know, fulfill my social duty and all."

"Too bad. I'm heading out soon. I hate these networking events. I've dealt with enough drunk flirting for one night."

Jessie sat up a bit in her seat, eyes narrowing at her phone. "Sorry, what?" She typed out.

"You know. Smarmy partners from out of town getting a bit too confident after a few drinks. I'm okay - please don't worry, but yeah, promises of dancing and a good time despite me explicitly saying I have a girlfriend. A gorgeous and wonderful one, at that."

Jessie's chest tightened and burned as she read the message. You were beautiful and charming, so it was really no surprised that someone would hit on you. Still, she didn't have to like it.

"Well, I'm glad you're leaving. I'm sorry you had to deal with that. Hopefully it hasn't been too bad."

"As if you're a stranger to being flirt with lol. I've seen the way the girls look at you ;) I mean, I should know, I'm one of them. But no, it's all good. Like I said, just makes me miss you."

"Well, text me when you're home so I know you made it safe. And get away from all those lecherous girls (and guys?). I don't like hearing about them looking at my girl ;)"

"I know, baby. Believe me, when their eyes were raking over me, all I thought about was you and the way you look at me when you're on top of me."

Jessie's eyes widened momentarily as her head snapped up to look around, suddenly very aware of everyone around her. Thankfully, everyone seemed mostly preoccupied. Before she could think beyond the visual of pinning you to the bed beneath her, her phone buzzed again.

"They don't know how good you fuck me. They don't know how good you make me feel."

"Fuck," Jessie whispered before she could stop herself. The feeling that went through her was instantaneous. She fidgeted in her seat, eyes darting around self-consciously before tapping out a reply.

"Jesus christ, baby girl." Send. "What are you trying to do to me?" She exhaled shakily and tried to ignore the heat she felt rising to her cheeks.

"What do you mean?"

She smirked. You knew damn well what you were doing.

"Babe."

"I mean, I guess it wouldn't hurt to stay out longer. Go dancing."

Jessie's grip tightened subconsciously on her phone as her eyes bore into the characters on the screen.

"Well then I'm coming there." Jessie rapidly typed out her reply, holding back the desire to write "Not without me, you're not." Jessie didn't consider herself a controlling person, she trusted you and you were both secure in your relationship together, but well, you just had a way of working her up. The thought of someone else wanting you, touching you, having you - she knew it was all harmless, but it drove her crazy nonetheless.

"Yeah? And what?"

Jessie looked around again before responding.

"And I'll make sure the only person who's grinding on you is me."

"Mm, baby. I love when you get like this."

A smirk tugged at the corner of Jessie's mouth.

"Your hips against mine. I'll move your hair to the side and kiss down your neck, my hand on your back and pulling you close to me." Jessie bit her lip briefly. "And if you're good, I'll lead you by the hand to the bathroom and fuck you. Your cum pooling in my hand as you tighten around me."

"Oh my fucking God, Jess. You're so hot. You've nearly got me touching myself in the back of this cab. I can picture you next to me, your hand moving up my thigh. I'd give anything to have your fingers inside of me."

Jessie exhaled again, looking around the room as she steeled herself. She checked the time on her phone.

"Baby, please. I need you so bad already. I want you on top of me."

Jessie's eyes scanned the text before she locked her screen again. This was getting out of hand. It buzzed once more.

"Show me I'm yours. I wanna scream your name."

"Hey, you okay?"

Jessie startled, nearly jumping out of her seat as her head snapped up to see Niamh looking at her with concern.

"Oh! Yeah, yeah," she nodded, doing her damnedest to seem nonchalant. She grimaced a bit. "I'm just not feeling that good. My head's pounding." She really should try to stay longer...but fuck it. "I think I'm gonna go."

"Oh okay, well, feel better. I'll see you at practice tomorrow?" Niamh asked as she gave Jessie's shoulder a squeeze.

"Yeah, for sure. I'm gonna go - you can let people know if they ask, right?"

"Don't worry. Rest up."

Jessie gave a half-hearted smile and wave and was out the door.

"Where are you?"

"On my way home. I'm so wet for you. I need to do something about it."

"Fuck," Jess breathed again. She typed, "I'm headed home, too. My baby needs me to take care of her."

"You have no idea. No one makes me feel like you do."

"They better not." She replied simply, biting her tongue on the matter as she climbed into the back of the car.

"Well, I guess you better get home soon and show me who this pussy belongs to."

Jessie exhaled sharply before readjusting her position. The tension that was mounting between her legs kept her from sitting still. Her mind was racing with thoughts and images of the two of you together. She needed you. She wanted to take you. And even with how much she loved and respected you, she wanted to claim you.

She rolled out her shoulders and gripped her knee tightly as she tried to relax.

Time went by achingly slowly as you sent teasing message after teasing message. Your messages were exhilarating, but taunting at times. It only made matters worse when her phone buzzed showing a phone call from you. She swallowed as she picked up.

"Hi, my love," your voice came through from the other end of the line. Jessie gulped once more as her nails dug into her leg again. "Don't say anything. I just got home. I'm getting undressed and I'm getting ready for you. Here - listen." Jessie's eyes fluttered shut and her jaw dropped as sounds of your wetness filled her head. Her eyes only opened again when your voice filtered back in. "That's how much I need you. It's all for you."

"I love you so much," Jessie said as she bundled her shirt in a fist, loss for words otherwise and desperate for some kind of release.

"I love you too, baby," you replied softly. "I can't wait until you fill me up."

Jessie's mouth fell agape once more. The craziest part of it all is that you were nearly as reserved as she was in day to day life. The fact that you were like this with her and her alone made her feel like she was on top of the world. She'd allowed you into a special place in her heart, in her being, and you'd done the same for her. Nothing could be better.

By the time the cab pulled up in front of your apartment, Jessie felt like she might burst out of her skin.

She took the stairs two at a time as she ascended the stairwell up to where you were waiting. She grunted in frustration as she fumbled with the keys before the lock turned and she threw the door open. Her gaze was immediately drawn to the light coming from your room down the hall. She'd taken off her shirt and thrown it aside and was already undoing her jeans by the time she rounded the doorframe to see you lying on the bed, head thrown back, fingers massaging your clit.

"Fuck, babe," Jessie breathed as she quickly finished undressing and climbed up onto the bed, immediately grasping your hand and giving you a kiss on the back of it before pushing your legs back and tasting you.

You let out a cry at the touch and placed your hand on the back of Jessie's head as she began to lap up your juices.

"Oh my god, baby," you moaned, hips gyrating up into her mouth. "I love you. I needed you so bad. Oh my god."

She moaned in appreciation as her lips closed around your clit and she sucked hard at the sensitive bud. She smiled as your hips jerked at the action.

"You taste so good," she mumbled as her tongue trailed up and down between your folds. "And you're all mine." She grinned again as your fingers tightened in her hair.

"No one else's," you affirmed in a breathy voice, followed up by another moan as she flicked her tongue across your clit. She continued to devour you and it wasn't long before your cries filled the room. "Don't stop," you pleaded as you gripped her hair tightly and began to cum. She moaned deeply as your legs flexed around her head and she continued to lap up your juices like it was the only thing that mattered in this world.

When your legs finally relaxed and your hips fell back down to the bed, she laid one more kiss on your lips before wiping her chin and climbing up your body. As she did, ran two fingers along your folds and grinned at the small cry you let out as your hands gripped her biceps. She leaned down and whispered in your ear as her fingers traced around your entrance.

"You still want me to fill you up, baby?" She nipped at your earlobe. "Make your pussy mine all over again? Make sure you keep thinking of me and only me anytime someone else wants you?"

"Oh god," you moaned in need as you writhed beneath her.

"Do you want me, baby?" She asked softly as her fingers continued to tease you.

"Always," you whimpered. "Oh god, Jess. Please, I need you inside me."

She wrapped her free arm around your back and leaned down to tenderly kiss your jawline.

"You're the only one for me," she said before sinking her fingers deep inside of you. Your breath caught in your throat and she bit down on your collarbone, stopping herself before it got to be too much.

"Fuck, you feel so amazing," she breathed in reverie. "You feel incredible every time." She shook her head as she slowly pulled out and moved back in. "God, so tight."

You didn't hold back, your moans filling the room as Jessie began to pick up her pace. "You feel so good inside me, Jess." You clutched her to you. "You fill me perfectly."

Jessie growled in approval as she began to fuck you harder. Even if you hadn't laid a finger on her, she was dizzy with pleasure from knowing how good she made you feel and to know it was because of her - no one else - her.

"Baby, you're perfect for me," she praised as she took you in.

A night out with her team, fan adoring her and flirting with her, she didn't need it - all she wanted was to be with you right now. To be the one to take you high and over the edge. To fall asleep with you, wake up with you and breathe you in.

Your grip tightened on her and your cries rose in pitch. She kissed your neck tenderly.

"Go ahead, baby. I'm here, I won't let go," she coaxed you as your sounds echoed off the walls and you began to tighten around her fingers.

Her name fell from your lips as your whole body tensed up and all the pleasure building inside of you released. You were vaguely aware of the whimpers that came from her as she bucked against you and pulled you ever closer.

As you drifted down from your orgasm, she slowly and gently kissed up your neck and face. Your mind and body finally calmed and she reached your lips. She gave you a soft kiss coupled with a sly grin.

"Hi," she said. You were still catching your breath, but managed to nod and return a lazy smile.

"Hi," you chuckled. You brought your hands up to cup her face and kissed her again, deeper this time. She returned it earnestly, grazing a thumb across your cheekbone. You smiled once more and gave her a soft peck. "Thanks for coming home. I missed you."

She laughed and kissed your cheek. "I missed you, too. Could you tell?"

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

The meta text of Vaggie hating when people don't use her name or try calling her by another one THEY think she should use, bc they think her name is too vulgar or demeaning or too silly not to joke about -> and then parts of the fandom doing the same thing, is honestly really hitting home in a queer way

here's a character who we know wants people to use her chosen name.

we know she does because she corrects Adam to his face "Actually, it's pronounced Vaggie" drawing a hard line of NO between the old name he gave her with that soft G and the one her girlfriend uses for her now

her exasperation even during the battle, answering Pentious's call out of Vaggatha but still also tiredly pointing out "Not my name", and

ironically. The second miss-naming hurts me more than the first

the Adam thing makes me hate the guy on a personal level, with his stupid smug little "Hmmmmmm- no. Anyway-" saying Vaggie isn't ALLOWED to name herself something new as if he has any claim over her, as if her name has anything to do with him after he abandoned her

But the Pentious thing almost hurts worse for how well meant and casual it is. How familiar that is.

Here it's coming from a friend and the misnaming is a sign of affection from him, a show of respect. He's not calling her the purple female anymore. This is Pentious and his tick of getting polite and formal when addressing people he likes, him snapping his earnest salutes, him as we saw earlier that episode with his shy "Miss Bomb" towards Cherri.

And the way Vaggie just kinda rolls her eye and takes it from him while still clearly not liking it...

She used to wear a uniform that made her almost identical to the other Exorcists around her, she was given her old name by the man in charge of her, a name based on how useful to him she was, she's still got all that soldier stuff marching through her head making her grab for her spear and leaving her with no idea how to get people to bond other than throwing them bodily into a warzone

It just makes sense that the woman she's in a long term happy relationship with be so normal about her chosen 'vulgar' and 'inappropriate' name

Being together that long means Charlie probably knows this specific frustration her girlfriend has and cares enough about her to just say "Vaggie" like its nothing. Or maybe she just thinks, duh, of course she'll use the name Vaggie tells her to use

Maybe Charlie being that kinda person is part of what Vaggie loves about her in the first place. The amount of trust Charlie places in people, just by default

Because there could be good and bad reasons Vaggie's using a version of her old name after leaving that life behind

She could be doing it to remind herself of the shit person she was and feels she has to still make up for being, it could be tied to her self imposed new life purpose of helping make Charlie's dreams come true, it could be Vaggie keeping part of something she hates (herself) so she can feel a bit of "deserved" pain over it even when she was too scared to admit her past to anyone else- a sneaky way to always be reminded of it by the new people in her new life anyway

but that's her choice. People are allowed to make bad decisions for themselves

there's that ethos of the whole hotel and redemption plan again, Charlie's dreams and ideals swinging back into action even when Charlie maybe doesn't know it

what's the idea of redemption or personal change other than accepting that people CAN make choices for themselves? They can even make shitty ones, and that's not a reason to drop them forever or take the choice away like they don't deserve it anymore

What's the permanent extermination of souls other than saying they forever lost the right to say what happens to themselves?

a gay woman is calling herself after vag while switching out her soldier gear to wear miniskirts and giant as fuck hair bow ribbons while kissing and cuddling her girlfriend. Maybe it's cringe. Maybe it's camp. Even if Vaggie obviously isn't meant to be literally trans, it's that deliberate choice thing again, a kinda switcheroo from Adam naming her Vagina just bc it's something that he likes for how it makes him feel good, to Vaggie saying no this is MY thing now.

The Vagina to Vaggie thing is the difference between putting a name on someone else verses taking it for your own.

and Charlie affirms that choice, that right of Vaggie to be called the name she choses, no matter WHAT it sounds like or how awkward it makes some people feel

like, if someone in real life told you their name was Vaggie, would you use their name for them?

Would you accept feeling a bit weird for their sake?

Or would you do what happens so much in real life, when people who care still think they know better or feel like someone being who they are infringes too much on their own sense of comfort or even on that person's own safety, and with all the good intentions and love in the world, someone hurts someone else without understanding that they're evening doing it.

Like Pentious

Who is really and truly Vaggie's friend. The guy she got off to a rough start with but ends up rooting for, shoving her gf out of the room so he can talk to his own crush in peace. He dies to try protecting his friends, including her, and she misses him when he's gone

and he still thought he was doing a nice thing by calling her the more 'normal' sounding "Vagatha". Either because he assumed Vaggie couldn't really be her full name, or thought she deserved better

Charlie doesn't think Vaggie needs a better name

Charlie says her name all the time like it's her favorite word ever, if only because it belongs to the woman she loves

i feel a lot of things about that.

[sk3tch404]

How do you feel about yan jojo characters using there stand to harm there darling ? Or use it to there advantage.I like to imagine some characters like jotaro, jolyne , Joseph using there stands to kidnap or threaten their darling

YES!! I LOVE THIS QUESTION!!!

I really hate it, but sort of love the idea because of the power imbalance it brings. Especially if darling isnt a stand user themselves.

I'm pretty sure darling would have a mental break because how the fuck is an invisible force dragging them up by the ankle?? Gravity?? Hello? Not to mention being HURT BY IT? Yeah ur all checked out.

Using the Joestar bloodline specifically for this was diabolical, thank you.

Jotaro would be one to use Star Platinum to intimidate his darling-- as if he himself wouldn't already be enough-- but he would never use Star to hurt them. Only if it were necessary. Afterward, he'd feel obligated to treat his darling be it tending to their wounds or gifts to make it up if they deserve it. He's a pretty closed off guy, so showing remorse face-to-face is a hard thing. Younger Jotaro would have a lot more difficulty with saying sorry. He'd say things he didn't really mean, "Then don't be a pain." Okay, he kind of meant it, but that's just his default response. Jotaro would make it up in some way or another to get rid of that cold shoulder of yours.

That's only if you're ballsy enough to even let him loom over you in dead silence for more than a few seconds.

Older Jotaro using his stand to hurt his darling is reserved for worst case scenarios only as well. He has more resources and has come a long way since his teenage years. He doesn't expect for his darling to magically get comfortable around him instantly or even in several months following the revelation of his yandere tendencies. He finds that using violence to get ones way doesn't really get what people want in the end, so its useless to him. It only applies if his his darling is actively running or trying to kill him.

Something he'd do in general with Star to intimidate his darling is scare tactics. Jotaro is pretty straightforward and tells it how it is, but he isn't above telling a few lies to get you on his side. He sees no point in hurting himself or you for some brownie points, so he does the obvious. Break shit around you. Though, not in some fit or tantrum. Rather, just to showcase the control he has in each situation. It seems to be way easier to crack a table in half, leaving concern for splinters around you two, (not that he cares much), and have you willingly be smart than grabbing you by the arm and dragging you away kicking and screaming. So damn annoying. It'd stress him out, and again, he hates screaming.

Jotaro would 100% use the help of Star to kidnap his darling. He utilizes Star well and gets the job DONE. Not to mention having the Speedwagon Foundation backing him up as well.

Old Joseph would use Hermit Purple occasionally. Assuming he had a falling out with Suzie, he wants to appear as best as he can for his darling. He'd be a gentleman. Well, as gentlemanly as an eccentric elder who's main focus is breaking and talking to screens can get. Joseph wouldn't use Hermit Purple to teach his darling a lesson or scare them at all. The only times he'd feel inclined to whip his stand out is to restrain his darling if they decide to attempt escaping, or to... do what old people do. Yeah.... But anyway, those are the only two most likely scenarios that come to mind if he were to ever use ol' H.P on his darling. Joseph would rather focus on wooing and winning over his darling rather than forcing them into submission all the time.

I do want to be like, "He would put pedal to the metal," or, "A little elbow grease does the trick," but honestly, that belongs to Young Joseph. Same guy basically, just more unhinged and less wise. Young Joseph would intentionally push his darling, but would suffer the unintentional consequences. He just wants some luv 💔 "Oh no! I made my darling cry because I kept dragging them away from the people they love and continuously pushed their boundaries! I tried to do everything right, how could this happen?" WHY ARE YOU DENSE SIR. GEEZ LA WHEEZ.

Jolyne would use Stone Free to mess with the stuff in her darling's life so they come running to her instead of scaring them into submission. She's a romantic at heart, but her darling doesn't make it easier by pushing her away. In the usual prison setting, she'd whisk away your stuff so you have to come asking if she has any commissary to spare. Other times, she's petty enough to mess with others in front of you if she feels threatened by them. Although, she'd either make sure to be low-key about it, or brush it off if you really have an issue with it, "So what? It's not like they're our friend right? This ain't a daycare or whatever. And besides, its not even a big deal. Don't worry about it." Gets sort of defensive, but always backs her "claims" up in some way. A bit foolish, but quick thinking.

She tries to tone it down usually due to there being potential hundreds of stand users that could get back at her for something stupid she did. If her darling ever caught on to her antics, (probably because the crazy shit always gotta happen around her), she'd deny it HARDCORE at first, but would feel bad eventually and confess because what's a relationship without communication and trust? She'd never want to lie and snowball that into something she can't control anymore. Jolyne might get emotional, but her drive outweighs the doubt in her. She'd make it up to you in any way she can, and with her friends, she can make prison life a whole lot easier or harder. Darling's choice.

[ronearoundblindly]

For Cevans + Bucky.. I curious what is each of their ‘toxic traits’ or ‘red flags’ in a relationship… assuming characters like Lloyd do find themselves in an actual monogamous relationship. Whether it’s jealousy, excessive possessiveness, manipulative behavior.. etc I’m curious to know your thoughts on whose what 🥰🖤

o.0 ok this is interesting...

And since you specifically brought him up, I'll start with Lloyd--Warnings for sexual references and toxic behaviors. MINORS DNI.

Lloyd Hansen

Not sure if there's a name for this trait, but I believe Lloyd would have a huge issue merging sex and feelings. He can fuck without thinking and be selfish. If he grows to actually respect someone?? Well...if he does care, I'm not sure he can bring himself to use a partner the same way he would a throwaway hole. Lloyd might have a bit of trouble bringing that pedestal down once he puts you up there.

That's what was so beautiful and easy for him before: he never cared; he could just enjoy himself and not give a shit about anyone else. This might lead to him finding release with others (cheating) when he can't bring himself to treat you the same way he did before catching feelings.

Steve Rogers

Passivity. (Is that a real word for this? Whoops.)

He's so patient and so stoic and so fucking passive, you just want to wring his neck sometimes. He will not ask if/when something seems off/awkward between you. Steve just waits for you to bring it up if you ever do. He doesn't really take charge inside your relationship. He will answer any question you pose straight to him, but otherwise, fucking nothing.

Bucky Barnes

Doomsday mindset. Buck spirals like crazy and always assumes the worst. If you laugh really loud at someone else's joke? You like them better. You're going to leave him. If you don't text or call him for one day? You don't want to talk to him, aren't thinking about him, and have moved on.

He relies heavily on proximity to assuage these fears, so leaving on extended missions is akin to torture. There's always a period of having to smother him in reassurance once he returns. Every. Single. Time.

James Mace

His greatest strength is his greatest weakness: practicality.

Mace is the fucking worst at casual romance; I bet you didn't even know this guy liked you until his tongue was deep in your mouth. It all seemed just professional, or just friendly, until suddenly it didn't, meaning Mace offers zero reassurance that you two are going anywhere. He may assume you two are fine...all the time...because he said he was fine and happy that one time three months ago. That's good enough, right?

Y'all know I love this boi to the sun and back, but his emotional openness is extremely lacking. He's the type I can see being broken up with A LOT simply because he won't fight to stay together/connected. He takes it for granted that you are together.

Curtis Everett

Lack of communication. Curtis will let things fester until the last second. He is a bit of a procrastinator when it comes to everything, bless, but Curtis is not a fan of deep and emotional conversations. This can--and often does--make you feel like your relationship develops super slowly and isn't solid/stable. He cares for you, but it's difficult to tell if you two are ever on exactly the same page until the end of the chapter. Playing catchup is frustrating.

Jimmy Dobyne

Womp. My least favorite of the toxic traits (weirdly, because it's not even the actual worst)--Jimmy is that old-school, typical man who expects a certain amount of subservience from his partner. He's not going to cook if you're there. He's not going to clean when you can instead. When it comes to you're own kids, he's defers to you unless specifically asked (when alone), not when in public.

And that's really the problem with this behavior: it looks to outsiders that he treats you equally and pulls his weight because he absolutely can. He just defaults to being the breadwinner/man of the house.

This could be overcome but only if you force the conversation a bunch of times. You work and are tired at the end of the day, but for some reason it's 'different' when he is tired from working and unwilling to do anything at the end of the day.

Johnny Storm

Petty, mindgame, stereotypical manipulations. Johnny is notoriously 'in-tune' with the ladies, but he is SO USED TO bimbos who play the games of dating (i.e. acting uninterested to make men chase them, saying the opposite of what they mean, etc.) that he plays them, too. He doesn't act as interested as he is. He plays it cool and hard to get and indifferent. He behaves as if any decent amount of time and affection is smothering and clingy. He doesn't let himself be vulnerable in any way...

...until well after most girls would have given up.

Jake Jensen

Insecurity. He's inexperienced and second-guesses everything he does. He takes advise from all the wrong people and gets it from places. Jake is not confident enough to trust his instincts, and it gets him into more trouble than he even realizes. After an extremely long time (and endless patience from his partner), Jake comes into his own, gets comfortable, and might take the lead every now and then.

Ari Levinson

Excessive possessiveness 100%. I've touched on this in a B&B story, but Ari doesn't own a whole lot. One of those few things is you.

I actually believe he's able to tamp this urge down a good portion of the time. However, if Ari is worn down or drunk, he can't moderate that you are his, he wants you right here, and he will fucking fight. You have to keep him on his best behavior around newer friends or business folk. He doesn't understand that professional courtesy might look similar to flirting. Sometimes you'll need to butter up men, but you'll also need Ari to not be around for that.

Ransom Drysdale

Also possessive but mostly JEALOUS. Jealous to the point a frequent stocking stuffer at xmastime is Jelly Bellies. It's a running joke; even if he doesn't particularly like every flavor in the bag, they are his jelly beans. Ran won't share. He fucking hates it. He hates sharing you for any amount of time or reason. Having family and friends is vaguely okay (male friends...eh, attractive male friends can eat shit), but having coworkers who get your attention? Fuck right off with that. Come home to him. Hold his hand. Sit in his lap. Don't smile at that person. Don't go out when you could stay with him.

[Main Masterlist; Who Would... Masterlist; Ko-Fi]

[smokeypeaches-and-honeyplums]

First i just wanna say your headcanons are seriously top notch, excellent work 👌. Ok now onto the actual request, could you do the NSFW alphaber for Macaque like you did for Redson? Don't forget to have a lovely day. 💙

What a way for me to return lmao. Thank you for the compliment, I tend to get self conscious about my writing.

You've heard it all before. Sorry for being inactive, I'm coming back, especially with the new specials coming out. I have more time on my hands. Gonna go through the box until I can start accepting again.

Edit post-s5: all is hell and I just need to cope atp what the FUCK was that season/pos

Reader is Gender-Neutral by default!

// NSFW!! MINORS DNI //

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

I like to imagine Macaque is very cuddly for aftercare. Tapping into his primal side, he's more possessive and protective. So, he holds onto you, petting you as he whispers in your ear, helping you down from subspace if he has to (or domspace if you topped).

Given he has portals, shadow travel and clones, he can get all your needs met without leaving you. So, you get cuddles AND resources provided. The perfect aftercare.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Macaque honestly doesn't like much about himself. He can talk the talk, looking as if he has a healthy or overbearing ego, but get him alone for long enough? He'll be second guessing how he even blinks

Exaggerating, of course

Point is, there's not much. A lot of it has been marred as well, so it makes it worse. Though, he's come to love his face. With or without the glamour, you've gotten this far with him and loved him through his roughest time. And it's one of the things you seemed to fall for

Besides, he's gotta admit, he does look a bit on the good side.

On you though, if you're Masc leaning, he loves your arms. Shows your strength and capabilities, and their nice to look at. It feels nice to be vulnerable in them

If you're Fem leaning, he'll admit, he's a bit of an ass guy. Ass and thighs, specifically. Their nice to lay on. And they also feel so nice between his fingers, against his hips...

Ahem.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Leaning into that more primal side, Macaque likes to mark you now and then. He isn't very fond of making messes, borderline germaphobe if you asked me, but there's a part of him that likes to make a mess out of you specifically, in such a way no one else could, in such an intimate setting

It gives him a sense of control and possession of something intimate he's honestly been lacking for... however long its been honestly

However, if you make big messes/are a squirter, he's eating that shit up, figuratively and literally

It's like ambrosia on his tongue

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Believe it or not? Macaque doesn't really have a dirty secret. None he would consider one, anyways.

But, a secret at ALL would be how Macaque really wants to be cherished. He DOES want to give up control to a degree, he's just scared of getting hurt again. You can only do so much to heal his soul, so when he DOES bottom, CHERISH it. He doesn't do it easy

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Can I say no? Not really?

Okay, well, not completely, but he's a quick learner

Macaque has been dead for however long it's been. And in that time, he definitely kept to himself A LOT. Hard to make connections when you're supposed to be, ya know, DEAD. So he didn't pick up much. But he did pick up SOMETHING

But, he's a quick learner. So don't worry too much. He does ask that you tell him if he's doing something wrong though, he doesn't wanna hurt you

That's the last thing he wants to do

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Honestly, in contrast to Redson, Macaque hates any position where you can see his face in turn. Sure, he loves to see yours, but contrary to popular belief, he HATES how he looks.

He knows how to fake it til he makes it, so that confidence is very exaggerated

But hey, at least he still gets to have a good show as he has his way with you

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He'll pop a joke now and again, don't get me wrong. Macaque isn't AS much of a hardass about it in comparison to how Redson would be about the moment. Though he doesn't want it completely ruined

He won't hesitate to make you laugh though. Especially if it helps ease tension

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He's a monkey. Hair goes crazy

Macaque never thought to really groom down there. I mean, why would he? He never expected to get to this point with anyone again.

So no, he's not really "well groomed," so I hope you don't mind fur in your mouth if you go to town on him in either regard on either side

He does develop a habit to get better groomed though.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Macaque is very intimate. He cherishes this, cherishes YOU. You mean so, so much. You've gotten this far with him, so he treasures you and whenever you guys get down and dirty, he does it with the intention of love making.

No primal urges

No biting (unless you want to, that is)

Just pure and utter devotion.

Maybe it's because it's all he's known, but it's how he shows his love to you. Praise and devotion.

uh- where were we again?

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Macaque only really starts to masturbate proper when he gets in a relationship with you and start to get intimate (or just, getting intimate in general if you're just fwb)

Don't get me wrong! It's not like he HASN'T touched himself before. He's a demon at the end of the day, urges happen

It just increased in frequency when he got tangled up with you

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Honestly? BDSM. Especially Bondage. Bondage specifically on you, though. For... obvious and not so obvious reasons

Roleplay! He's an actor, he's dramatic, he's a theater kid. He's gotta put it somewhere, right?

He's very partial to oral and might even have an Asphyxiation kink, in regard to both of you. Especially you though. And, in moderation so neither of you get hurt

Likes to use his clones on you now and again. It's fun to see

Would you believe me if I said he has a slight Exhibition kink? Listen to my vision-

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

As far away from FFM as possible /hj

Macaque prefers it to be somewhere he can have you to himself. In the future, or some point in time, he could entertain the idea of sharing. Maybe. But until then, no one gets to see the faces you make.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Macaque is a simple man/demon. Anything on average to get ANYONE going would get him going

Show a bit of skin in the right places, curve a certain way, bend over in front of him

He's a simple man/demon. He's allowed to give in to his vices when he's tempted by the likes of you

If you're Masc leaning, he'll start to get going just from seeing your arms and muscles flex, even if you're doing something simple. He folds easy

If you're Fem leaning, anything that shows off your ass and/or thighs has him weak in the knees and absolutely unable to keep his hands to himself. He folds easy²

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Macaque absolutely REFUSES to be bound. He'll entertain the idea of holding himself back, but he REFUSES to have his legs and arms bound. For, again, obvious and not-so obvious reasons

Macaque REFUSES to hurt you in any way beyond the asphyxiation. He regards you in such a high light, that he refuses to purposefully hurt you. It'd destroy him, no matter how much you would tell him its okay, no matter the context. So no knifeplay, bloodplay, or anything of that sort.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Macaque's asphyxiation kink purely stems from oral, I am gonna be honest

He'dchokeonthestrap

He prefers to give than to receive, but if offered, he'll DEFINITELY take the chance. You didn't hear that from me though

He also likes the praise he gets from it too, but again, didn't hear that from me

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

If you couldn't tell from how much I say it, Macaque revels in you as a whole, so he likes to take it slow.

He tends to take things slow, no matter what it is, so you better best believe that he is taking his time with you. He'll squeeze in some teasing too to make you feel good

He wants to savour you

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Just because Macaque wants to savour you, doesn't mean he can't also have appetizers now and again

He'll have a quickie now and again, but don't be surprised if he asks for more. But it's also not impossible for it to be enough for him, so if he needs to get off, he'll settle

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

If you can't tell, the answer is No. For most things

Macaque is still willing to experiment, don't get me wrong, but he has very set boundaries for what area he'll be willing to experiment with and what he won't.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Look at him. Look at him and tell me you don't think he wouldn't be able to LAST.

Macaque's capable of a lot of things in and out of combat, so he definitely has the Stamina to last. Honestly, I have a general headcanon that demons, especially more powerful ones, have tons of stamina.

Have fun walking if you teased him :D

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Toys are a possibility. Macaque doesn't own em, so you'd have to bring them into the fray first.

Tease him though, and watch him melt in your hands when you get him to bottom. He makes the sweetest sounds

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Macaque's only unfair if you're unfair. And he'll always return the favor tenfold, no matter how badly you teased him. It's only fair, right? And besides, it's not like he's the only one that makes such sweet sounds

But trust, if Macaque starts teasing, you're in for a LONG night

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Macaque has sensitive hearing, if you couldn't tell, but that makes it all the better to him

He loves to growl in your ear if he tops, hear his pants and moans as he makes both of you feel good, hitting that spot you told him felt so good that one time, feeling you cling to him

And when he bottoms? He goes the full fucking MILE

Macaque is LOUD when he bottoms. If he's being this vulnerable, he might as well go all out. So he WHINES, he CRIES and by the great sage, does he MOAN.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Macaque's a dom-leaning switch, if you couldn't tell by now from what I've been implying, only bottoming once he's comfortable enough to and with his initiation the first go around

Also, whenever he teases, I like to imagine he likes to use his shadow abilities for various ideas (with your approval, of course). This includes Bondage, his clones, transformation. I mean, shit, sky's the limit

I also like to think he's not very good with the usual things at first. Things like dirty talk, foreplay, stuff like that. He will ask for guidance. He doesn't wanna fuck it up with you

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

I can FINALLY talk about it

Macaque's not some "well-endowed" sex master, so he's not gonna be packing some star-seeing dick either. Well, he could, when he knows how to use it

The guy's above average, at 7.1 inches and 5 in. in width lacking in curvature. He's never thought anything of it, since he never needed to use it often

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Demons have a naturally high libido, and Macaque is no different.

Same as I said with Redson, Macaque isn't some raging, horny demon just because of the type of demon he is. He can be primal, but he has control over it

Entertain it though...

Have mercy on your legs

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Once Macaque finishes for the night (or, however long,) he can be seen almost passing out. He'll make sure you're fine, hence why he kinda leans on his clones to care for you while he cuddles into you, but he kinda crashes out once he's officially spent. A bad habit of his

[peanutbubba]

This one might make me a freak but "I'm cringe but I AM FREE" is like my slogan at this point so popping off I will be again.

I am half awake

Younger Law, 20-22, finally loosing his virginity after trying since he turned 17. He'd gotten close with plenty of people before, it's just that he'd either get cold feet and leave his partner confused and with a leaf in their bed or he his expectations weren't met so he pushed them away. Personally I don't label Law's sexuality, don't care much for labeling sexuality in my headcanons much, so he has tried attempted with both sexs but because I want to (I don't think I could type what I wanna so I'll let you figure out what I was gonna say) I'm thinking of a scenario where he looses his virginity to a dude, maybe just amab, I feel like virgin Law would be scared of a strap.

Guy's probably older by maybe 3 years, and it makes a difference, first person to get Law to calm down enough to not instantly ghost them once more than a shirt comes off, first person to make Law want to be heard by the neighbors, first person to fuck Law so sweet and good he almost considers offering them a place on his crew cause god all mighty the dick is that persuasive. Also, as a treat, they switch at some point or a few, still a lot of his partner talking Law through it and giving him special attention for doing so good at fucking them. I feel like Law is a default soft top/sub top, he can lay pipe when asked but bro just wanna be praised for doing a good job fr. Jesus christ if you've seen some of the other shit I say in people inboxes I love the aftercare scene like the most. Law is doing nothing after he cums!! Doesn't matter, carry him or push him off if you must but he is not participating in the movement of his body unless you're injured. Image you get done plowing Trafalgar D. Water Law and he pouts when you expect him to help clean up or he lies on you chest (BOOBY ENJOYER LAW TRUTHERS RISE) after plowing you and is pouting when you mention you guys need to get up.

This is not nearly as freaky as I had first thought it to be. Another day then I will bring you something that make Deadpool and Wolverine fans blush.

- ✨️💀✨️

Virgin Law being afraid of a strap is the funniest thing to me, like I can just imagine him making that face he usually does when he’s in complete shock, except now it’s also mixed with a touch of terrified because this colorful piece of silicone is threatening to destroy his hole. It also probably freaks him out that it isn’t real.

Anyways, as for my input, imagine marine hunter, or solo pirate reader actually being the one that helps him get over his fear. He already doesn’t have a good rep with either, but you’re able to smooth talk him enough to get him in a hotel room with you (bonus points if reader has an accent, or is just really fucking good with their words.), only to see how tense and awkward this man is.

You spend like a good 10-15 minutes just calming him down and setting up some boundaries with him, and he’s surprised as fuck because A.) you’re this super dangerous person but you’re actually super sweet?? And B.) you’re one of the first people to take the time to check in constantly with him.

Except at some point it pisses him off how nice you are, you’re balls deep in him and have already checked in with him 3 fucking times! If you don’t just make him scream your god damn name!

And now the fun part is that because you’re a marine hunter/solo pirate you’re usually just wandering from island to island with your own agenda, sometimes you just stop by wherever the fuck Law is now because you’re both in this unlabeled relationship with each other.

Sometimes you get him coins, medical books, more coins, just any gift you’d think he’d appreciate because you like seeing that stupid grin he gets when something he likes is in his hands.

As a thanks he always takes you to his captain quarter, the next morning you’re stumbling out completely dazed and fumbling with your ship as you mumble sweet flustered goodbyes, mean while he looks perfectly fine like you two didn’t spend the entire day exerting yourselves in his bed.

It’s always something new with him too, for a once virgin he can get down and freaky!

But one particular day you guys decided to switch roles, instead he’s on top now and good golly is this man so gentle. It can’t even be considered fucking anymore, this man is practically making genuine love to you.

Not that you’re mad about it, especially when you spew whispered praises about how he’s doing so good, or how he’s filling you up so well, and you can see his skin prickling with goosebumps in a good way.

Whimpering as he melts under your soft words, the soft sex somehow becoming even softer?! It’s great.

And when both of you are satisfied and done he’s laying his head on top of your chest and just resting, burying himself as far as he can between your tits. If you even try to protest this 6 foot almost 200 pound man just gets grumpy, plus all it gets him to do is close his arms around your waist and pull you even closer to him, burrowing himself even further in your chest like he’s trying to fuse with you.

It’s kind of cute, but also nasty because you’re both so sweaty, plus your legs are dripping with drying lube and cum and you terribly badly want to shower.

The only way you’re getting him off of you is if you physically pull him off and carry him to the bathtub. Yes you have to fill it with water, yes you have to wash him, and yes he is once more all up on your fucking boobs again.

It doesn’t matter if you’re on his lap or he’s on yours, either way you’re dealing with this until you have to clean your chest, or his face.

Best believe afterwards all he’s doing is putting some boxers on, you have to change the bedsheets and after that his cozying himself all up on you, he is the little spoon no objections.

On a side note, this idea get even 10x funnier if instead reader is already apart of a crew. He knows that you’re loyal to your captain and all but like… c’mon, he’s so much better!

It’s even WORSE if your captain is Luffy or Kidd, this man is not accepting it. What do they have that he can’t literally do 100x better 😒.

Join him instead… pretty please… with a cherry on top??

—

I love this freak, please never stop talking about him with me 🙏.

Also as a Deadpool and Wolverine fan I take this as a challenge, hit me with the freakiest shot you got.

[unseemingowl]

Saga Anderson, and Nordic rep in Alan Wake 2

Early on in Saga Anderson’s exploration in Alan Wake 2, she runs into Ilmo Koskela. Fiercely proud of his Finnish heritage, Ilmo gregariously makes note of Saga’s Nordic sounding name and the familiar design of her knitted sweater. Perhaps a fellow Finn?

Alas no, Saga’s mom is Swedish she informs him. Immediately Ilmo’s face falls. I’m not sure if it’s actually just the animated character defaulting to his resting face, but either way the timing is too perfect. Cue uproarious laughter from me. People in the Nordics are on friendly terms of course, but we gotta have the tiniest bit of… scornfor each other. All in good fun of course. It’s traditional.

Now, I’m Danish, not Finnish, but still, I feel right at home in the towns of Bright Falls and Watery in Alan Wake 2. All of the little nods to Nordic culture and mindset feel so wonderfully familiar to me. The melancholia, the irreverent sense of humor, the affection for the Finnish and Swedish quirks of the characters. The game feels all the stronger in tone and narrative for Remedy embracing the Finnish roots of the studio.

Which is exactly why it sucks that I almost immediately saw the charm of those narrative decisions weaponised against Saga.

I first watched the scene between Ilmo and Saga on a lets play when I was trying to figure out if I should finally dip my toes into survival horror and buy the game. Delighted by the writing I took a look into the comments to see if people were vibing as hard with it as I was. They were. But I also saw a comment that made me frown.

Paraphrasing, it basically went, come on, like hell a guy like Ilmo would make the assumption that a black woman is Finnish. There are a multitude of reasons why I think that person was wrong, mainly that Nordic people love it when we run into each other in other countries, but it also just made me sad.

Saga being black does not negate her Swedish heritage. Formally, she is American, sure (I assume, not sure how that works in the US), but she’s raised by her single Swedish mom, of course she’s going to identify heavily with that part of her herself. It’s a profound and essential part of who she is.

But hey, I’m a white potato Dane, so I’m not gonna argue that I know much about the experience of being biracial. I’m gonna stick to what I know, which is that Saga is a very moving and beautiful example of something that I’m actually not used to seeing much of - a story about connecting with your Nordic heritage and roots. And it’s part of why I love her so much.

When Nordic people show up in big, international productions, it’s usually as Vikings, and sure, it’s fun to see our wild ancestors, but contemporary questions of Nordic identity and heritage is not something I often see explored. Not even in our own productions.

So much of Saga’s story is about family. Fighting for her current one, Logan and Casey (and sure, David too, lol), and rediscovering her first one. Tor and Odin.

Her discovering her ties to Tor and Odin is profoundly moving and made me teary-eyed several times over. And sure, a lot of those ties are fantastical in nature, but they still feel very much grounded - and what makes us Nordic if not the ties to our myths and legends that Tor and Odin have made themselves the living avatars of.

While Saga’s mom, Freya, had good reasons for leaving the Anderson seer magics behind, seeing them as part of what made her family fucked up, she also cut Saga off from the fullness of her capabilities. It is only through Saga reforming her family, healing its scars and fully embracing the Anderson heritage that she becomes as powerful a parautilitarian as she is at the end of the game. That’s beautiful.

And in fact I think Saga being black only deepens the richness of those themes rather than negate them or make them irrelevant. Because yes, Saga’s story would have been moving if she was a white character too, but I am very well aware that a lot of biracial people of Nordic ancestry can feel alienated from that part of themselves. Not least because questions of who gets to claim a Nordic heritage can get pretty ugly around here. There are most definitely people who share the racist mindset of that commentator. It adds an extra dimension. Which is why seeing Tor and Odin’s eagerness to claim Saga as part of the Anderson heritage is all the more moving. Through her magics, she’s just so obviously an Anderson, and they’re so damn proud to call her theirs and fight alongside her. Because they all got that wild Viking blood in them. They’re part of her and she’s part of them.

Roger Ebert, the film critic once called movies empathy machines. I think games, when they’re at their best, can be an even more intense variation of that. Which is exactly why it baffles me that some people can play through Alan Wake 2 and still think Saga is a stunt-woke character rather than someone fully and beautifully integrated in the narrative. A narrative which, at its most basic level – in my opinion – is about the mystical bonds we form with each other and the rest of the world through art and love and blood and family and heritage. All the great horror doesn’t negate that either, it amplifies it. Kind of like that clicker.

[intimidating-fettuccine]

Can I request headcanons about Jason when he start organizing everything for his wedding with the reader? Not that specific day, I mean when the reader agrees to marry him and this man starts planning everything, I wonder what it will be like 👀

This got a bit long, but I hope you enjoy :)

Jason is SO FUCKING EXCITED to plan your wedding?? I mean the guy likes creating and organizing things, and so your wedding is like the magnum opus of all of the things he's ever wanted to do, especially because he gets to do it with you. As I have said before though, in any request about marrying Jason, your wedding is going to have to be pretty big. Jason has a reputation he's made and clawed his way up to the higher class society of the Underworld, and there are quite a lot of higher class demons and eldritch beings expecting invitations to your wedding once it's announced that the two of you are engaged. However, now that this thought is finally occurring to me, I think if you'd like to have a secret smaller wedding first with just you two and your closest friends and families, he's absolutely fine with that and would plan accordingly. He's very put together and mature about how he handles things, and he has such an eye for details that he wouldn't forget anything or let anything slip past him and end up incorrect.

Due to this, for the big wedding, Jason ends up quite particular. I've always seen the reception in my head happening in a very large and open ballroom, and I think he'd like the actual ceremony to be in a beautiful, open field with lots of flowers and trees surrounding you. I think he'd want the wedding colors to be red and black, but if you'd like different colors Jason is also fine to do a split theme. He does ask your opinion on literally everything he does because as much as he loves planning things, it is your day as well. When it comes to the flowers, I think he'd actually default to your opinion. He may want a say in the color, but when it comes to the actual flowers he wants them to be your favorite flowers. If you suggest doing half your favorites, and half of them his favorites, he feels quite flustered and happy about that and is very willing to go with that idea. I feel like he would also leave most of the menu up to you as well. It's taking place in the Underworld, but if you want all of your favorite human dishes to make up the entire menu, he wouldn't mind, as he'd want you to be able to eat and enjoy every single food item the two of you would have there.

When it comes to desserts, I think he'd want the entire wedding cake to be for just the two of you. It's something I personally have seen at a couple of weddings, and I feel like Jason would absolutely love it. When it comes to the guests, you can have separate cakes and other desserts for them to enjoy that the two of you could also partake in, but the actual wedding cake Jason feels would be more special if the two of you picked a flavor you both liked and had a small, personal cake of for the two of you to cut and eat together. Jason would also TOTALLY hand make little wedding toppers that look like the two of you. When it comes to the outfits the two of you will be wearing, Jason wants to definitely make his own outfit himself. When it comes to yours, if you'd indulge him and be okay with it, Jason would really, truly love it if you'd let him make your own outfit so the two of you could match. However, if you insist it has to be a secret from him, he would probably request that you allow Trender to make it (as Trender is pretty much one of the only fashion designers in the Underworld Jason trusts), and he'd give Trender Jason's plans for his own outfit, that way even if it's not exactly what Jason wanted, the two of you could still match (I would just let Jason do it personally though if you really could). When it comes to music, he'd let you both go 50/50 on the playlists, and I think he'd let you choose the first dance song. While Jason wants creative freedom in the wedding, he's definitely not a groomzilla of any sort, and he is very fair and open with whatever you might like to be in the wedding as well. He views it as a day for both of you and thinks you should both be equally happy with the ceremony and reception. He loves you more than anything in the entire universe, and he truly just wants the wedding to be done and over with so he can call you his spouse both emotionally and legally, and get started on spending the rest of your lives together.

[pansy-picnics]

hi:3

im veryyyyy much a lurker i do not put myslef "out there" alot(most of my asks r to my mutuals but im TRYING to het out of mh shell so...)

ANYWYAS HAI:3 uhhh one of ur uknighted dream/new dream kids looks reallh pretyy(i think its the oldest one idk hlp), BTW I LOVE emery but i wanna know more about the ukd kids, so like if u have the past posts u made about them or like... IDK HELP i just wanna know more aboutvtjem bcuz ive seen them a couple times and theyre really cutie☹️

also like i scream whenever you use she/her on hugo because YOU LITERALLY GET IT LIEK OMG🙏🙏🙏 i apologize this is very rambly but liek ur art is so sosososoososo pretty & ur hcs and aus and AUGH iys so GRASHSH, so like ya byebhue:33

AHHH THANK YOU FOR THE ASK IM SOSO HAPPY 🥹🥹💕💕💕 I LOVE ALL MY LURKERS BUT I LOVE IT SM WHEN YOU GUYS COMMENT OR ASK ME STUFF TEEHEE

All three of the ukd kids are GORGEOUS ngl so i assume you’re thinking of ilmari but i can’t rule out the twins either…..Eugene and raps have some good ass genes I’ll tell you that.

Also i’m glad people appreciate my feminization of hugo. I just she/her him by default atp i refuse to hide it any longer this is what the WOKE LEFT WANTS!!!!! He’s so androgynous it’s like if a man and a woman had a baby. I need to kick that f slur into the sun

Anyways…Ough….I HAVE been neglecting the ukd kids a lot lately though i hate to admit it. i love them just as much and i know what’s going on with them too… but the truth is their characters just didn’t “click” into place quite as well emery’s did i think

To be quite honest emery came to me in a vision. Like. “Eccentric cutesy teenage girl who reads bad smut and practices dubiously ethical medicine”. And that is the perfect archetype to me. Literally no notes. Ilmari and the twins on the other hand have….Taken a little longer to perfect. and ive had a LOT of people tell me they want to know more about them but i just haven’t gotten to it yet. Sometimes i wonder why emery is the fan favorite but then i remember i Barely talk about anyone else so. Oops

I have a pretty good idea of them now though i THINK? so i for SURE need to infodump AHSJSJDJFFG Ill put the rest of my more detailed thoughts below the cut uhhhh

Uhhh. Basically. Ryder is the golden child whos really expressive and energetic like raps but very anxious and neurotic. He’s honestly kind of the straight man of yhe group. Most people think it’s ilmari but this is Wrong. Eldest child syndrome despite being the middle child. Workaholic but he fucking hates his job. Stressed out 24/7 and hasn’t slept in 2 weeks. needs to be liked by EVERYONE or he will DIE.

Alina is the baby she’s kinda varian and cass core. Always in the shadow of ryder or ilmari, but shes had support where it matters, so she’s never really cared. She was the shy quiet kid growing up but now he is full of Rage. very clingy, headstrong and stubborn. Strong leader and always tries to take control but his older siblings dont rlly take him seriously. Kind of a smartass and a drama queen but specifically in an old hollywood detective kind of way

ilmari……quiet, blunt, dry and emotionally unavailable. Horse girl and the king of not giving a fuck. they’re a free spirit, and since they were the first to leave the nest theyre always just kinda Wandering. Doesn’t speak unless spoken to. They typically come off as very weird and unsettling, but they are very gentle and compassionate when it comes down to it, they’re just Bad at feelings. They’re silly i promise but they have that like dry ass adira ttpe humor.

I think one of the main reasons the twins are so hard for me to describe is bc i’ve failed to disclose their Main Gimmick, which is that they’re meant to start out as the the typical boy/girl twin trope— where ones shy, anxious and kinda nerdy, and the other one is charismatic, eccentric and extroverted— but by their teenage years, they’ve pretty much completely swapped in every regard: fashion sense and presentation, personality, mannerisms, etc.

they both have some core traits that are stuck to them for their entire lives, and are obviously still undeniably the same characters, but their overall archetypes kind of swap entirely.

as little kids, alina is the timid, reserved, kind of fluttershy-esque type, and is a bit more of the observant, logical “by-the-books” one. meanwhile ryder is the bouncy, outspoken wild child, to the point of being kind of ditzy and careless at times, but hes very emotional and has no trouble making his voice heard.

as they get older, though, alina, with a strong support system, is eventually able to find his voice and speak up for himself, and after years of being silent, he becomes kind of the rebel of the family. he’s intelligent, calculated, and very stubborn about what he believes in. plus, shes spent most of her life observing, so she has a very good understanding of whats going on around her- and a passion for leadership that’s reminiscent of cassandra’s. alina ends up being a very hardheaded, outspoken and emotional individual who’s eager to take a stand and is deeply afraid of being a burden on her loved ones, or worse, never accomplishing anything at all. She is also Soooo fucking angry like all the time and she NEEDS constant validation SO BAD or she will DIE. #Teenagerthings.

Meanwhile ryder, as coronas Golden Child, has the most pressure on him out of all the kids, and slowly becomes more anxious and closed off as he gets older. at his core he’s compassionate, creative, and kind of weird and snarky, but he gets lost in his own head very easily. he cares WAYYYYY too much what other people think of him and is 100% willing to just. Change and/or destroy himself to meet other peoples expectations. this is why he is a horrible choice for coronas heir and unfortunately, because hes REALLY good at masking, it takes everyone WAY TOO LONG to realize this. Even when he learns some decent coping mechanisms ryder always remains kind of a workaholic, neurotic and anxious person. Massive perfectionist also. he has ISSUES. 😭😭😭

the court: We’ve made the perfect heir for corona

rapunzel, gesturing to ryder: You fucked up my perfectly good kid is what you did!!!! Look at him!!!! He’s got anxiety!!!!!!

ILMARI!! ILMARI MY BABYGIRL!!!!!! Ilmaris honestly so so SO bad at feelings they are so distant but i swear they TRY THEIR BEST they just have AUTISM 😭🙏Unlike the twins ilmari doesn’t really have a huge change in character LOL…But i need to talk more about the trios dynamic, cuz they’re all VERY close especially when they were little. Once ilmaris traveling on their own, though, their relationship is a little more strained……..like i said ilmari is very much a wanderer, and they don’t write much either. Obviously they send like monthly letters to ukd out of obligation (cass and eugene especially get CRAZY paranoid otherwise…..) as well as some gifts to the family whenever they can but. Their letters highkey read like business emails LOL.

Ilmaris in a weird place where they do truly care about their family but like….They still feel a big disconnect from their identity and relationships in general. The emotional neglect from their birth mother and the autism have mixed together in the worst way possible and emotions are just never something they really Get.

I think especially in early adulthood they dont really have anywhere where they truly feel like they belong- So they kinda just fuck off to do whatever. They don’t see much of a need to communicate with anyone, mostly cuz i dont think it clicks in their head that people might Want to know about that stuff GAHAHAHAAHA

this is hard on ukd and the twins who end up feeling like mari just…. slips in and out of their lives so easily 💔 DO NOT FRET THOUGH!!!!! They do visit and they improve at communicating over time….their letters are still Corporate email core but they’re more frequent at least. And they eventually come back to corona for good to take over the library when var and hugo retire

Uhhhh I think thats it for rn this is kind of just me screaming incoherently but this ask has made me start working on a new art post abt the ukd kids FOR THE MASSES. 🤞🤞🤞🤞 i need you guys to understand my autistic brainwaves. Heres some incorrect quotes i did with them also cuz they’re sillyyyyyy

[alyssawritcs]

SUMMER  HOUSE  (  a  rafe  cameron  au  fanfic  )  . chapter one .

love  interest  :  au!rafe  cameron rating  :  pg  -  13  …  for  now  ( drinking , tension ) wc  :  5.2k  author's  note  :  eep  ,  first  chapter  for  this  .  obv  inspired  by  summer  house  /  summer  house  :  martha's  vineyard  .  lmk  if  yall  want  a  full  cast  list  for  the  other  members  of  the  house  or  anything  like  that  !  i  hope  you  enjoy  <3

The trill of the phone ringing as it was propped up against the window allowed for Tae to put herself directly in line with the Hamptons sun streaming through. That seven step skincare routine was showing the fuck out at the moment. She’d have to keep her phone here after she hung up with her cousin in order to get some selfies off for her IG Story later.

Distracted by her own reflection, she almost jumped when her image shrunk and Pope’s replaced it. “Cuzzo! Damn, you made it up there fast as shit.” He was eyeing the lush background she was standing in front of. He’d seen it plenty in their various FaceTime calls over the last four summers.

“Unlike the rest of you heathens, I wake up with the sun as the good Lord intended.” And as was hammered into her head by their shared grandmother. Tae and her mother had lived in Nana Joy’s house for the majority of her childhood so waking up at the crack of dawn to the sounds of BeBe and CeCe Winans was her default. “You what, an hour out?”

“That's what the GPS says. You shoulda stayed with us this summer, I know you ain’t even wanna be around them.” Tae rolled her eyes, though Pope was not wrong. Four previous summers at the 115 House (as the returning summer residents liked to call it) had convinced her that this would actually not be that bad, despite the circumstances.

“Wait, they’re all still going there?” Came another voice on Pope’s end of the line. She recognized it as his good friend JJ, a long time background listener of Tae’s various problems. They had been roommates when she attended Morehouse and they were running amok at UNC Chapel Hill so when she called her favorite cousin Sunday mornings to rant and rave about whatever new person had done whatever shiesty shit, JJ was always there listening. Tae wasn’t particularly shy about letting him listen in on her shit. Very little had changed in the seven years since, even after all of them had moved to New York. The two of them were still roommates and Tae still talked to Pope about her problems on Sunday, only this time she did it on his couch, while they ate bagels (with the occasional guest appearance by JJ).

“Yes, bro. Shit is weird, why would they even wanna share a house with you after all that?” Pope replied and she shrugged.

“I’ve been trying to figure that out my damn self. With Duke, I can sorta see it but Jalen’s being a weirdo - as per usual.” Tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear, she let out a long breath. “Did I show you how he was blatantly ignoring me in the groupchat? I literally would write something for us to do, he would say nothing. Then I had Fallon or Isaiah write the same thing and suddenly, ‘oh that’s a great idea guys hell yeah’. If I could reach through the phone ...” She let the sentence trail off as she made a choking motion with her hands. Pope chuckled. 

“See? I told yo’ ass, you do not need to be around all that weird ass shit. Come stay at ours.” She thought about the proposition for a second but almost immediately shook it off.

“Nah, I’m not leaving my primary bedroom privileges to go share a room with your funky ass.”

“Funky? Never been that, don’t try to play me.” 

“Whatever, I’ll just suffer in silence. You know me, I hate to complain.”

“Is this a new development? Because ...”

“Shut up!” The timer on the oven dinged, letting Tae know that the baked treats she’d set to start baking when she first got to the house were now officially done. She slid out the first tray, regular chocolate chip and placed it on the counter to cool, followed by a tray of chocolate raspberry crinkle cookies and then lemon tarts. 

“You stress baking, huh?” Her cousin grinned knowingly. She flipped him off as she removed the oven mitts. “You mixed all that shit that fast?”

“There’s two mixers here and the third is my own two hands.” She wiggled her fingers. “I want everyone to have a cute little snack when they get here. You can have some too.”

“In your words, pur!” Pope laughed as Tae threw her head back in a cackle, watching her move around the kitchen to get some plates for the treats. “Rafe, lemme change the address in the GPS, we gotta stop at 115 first.”

“Cool man.” Tae’s head snapped up at the phone so fast, she nearly got whiplash.

“Pope, I thought it was just you and JJ in the car.” She rushed over to the phone.

“Nah, Rafe is driving us. He’s the one with the Cayenne, we wanna arrive in style, girl. It’s the Hamptons!” He set the phone on some kind of stand, allowing her to finally get a full view of the inside of the car. Cherry red interior, she almost moaned out loud. JJ was in the backseat, Pope was passenger princess’d out, even nearly fully reclined, and the buff ass arm of their friend Rafe trailed up to his very handsome face. She could’ve died right there and then.

“Hi Taelor.” He smirked at her and she gave a small smile and waved back. “Who’s Jalen?”

In for a penny, in for a pound, right? 

“He’s my ex ... fling, I guess you could say? Okay so basically, two years ago, I spent most of the summer here hooking up with one of my roommates, Duke. He had just gotten out of a relationship, I was single, cool, whatever. It was just someone to have on the weekends up here and we sorta both understood that. He let me know, after Labor Day, that he had had dinner with his ex and they got back together. Okay, I’m cool with that. The next summer, last year, he and her decide that they’re gonna spend it out west with her people and I’m happy as a clam because no potential awkwardness. I’m chilling here and Keith, one of the other roomies, brings along his friend Jalen who proceeds to spend most of the summer all up under me, flirting with me, and leading me to believe that he wants me, right? Silly me, the boy tells me he wants me and I believed him!” Rafe snorted at that and she mentally patted herself on the back for making him laugh. She moved around the kitchen again, beginning to plate the cookies.

“So what did he do wrong that he’s now ignoring your messages?” He asked.

“You were listening for real, for real!” She grinned. “I didn’t wanna hook up with him that summer because I didn’t want a repeat of the Duke incident to happen, like I was actively avoiding that shit. However! He took me out on a couple of dates in the fall, in the city. I was literally one date away from taking it to the next level when he sent me a text ... A TEXT! Saying oh ‘my ex is back, she wants me again, sorry babe’. Could you fucking imagine how I felt reading that? I almost threw up!”

“That’s actually foul, Jesus Christ.”

“That’s what I said!” She sighed, organizing the plates on the counter and returning to her phone. “Anyway, now Duke is coming this summer and so is Jalen, and their girlfriends, and I’m Little Miss Rebound Girl that’s just gonna look like the sad and single and jealous one as they all canoodle.”

“We’ll be your buffer, Tae, don’t worry.” Pope chimed in.

“Yeah, you can come to ours whenever shit gets a little too romantic over there.” JJ offered.

“And I’ll be your fake boyfriend you can cuddle up with when they get to be too much.” Rafe was joking, she thought, but what a tempting offer.

The boys all worked, alongside their other friends Topper, John B, and Kelce, at a finance firm on Wall Street. During one of their after work bar crawls on a random Friday over a year ago, Pope had called Tae to meet them. She herself had just gotten off of work, a prestigious job as the producer for a hit radio show and subsequent podcasts for several clients. The show ran three mornings a week and the two podcasts she worked on recorded on Tuesdays and Thursdays, working out perfectly for as it left weekends open. In the summers, the morning show took a break which allowed Tae the option to get to 115 earlier than everybody else on Fridays and stay until Monday evening, while everyone else usually had to leave by Sunday night. The good pay also allowed her to pay a little extra so she could keep the primary for herself. Anyways!

She had gone to meet her cousin and his friend and ended up meeting their whole little crew, most of whom would be sharing the house this summer. That’s where she met Rafe, the oldest member of them all (only by two years, one in Kelce’s case) and also, the senior most member of their office in the group. None of them needed to say it but judging by the very understated Breguet on his wrist the first time they met, he was very clearly the richest one, yet surprisingly humble. He wasn’t excessively flashy with his shit, just liked to sit there and laugh along with the jokes. She figured he liked the boys because they were far from the classic finance bro types, more frat bro than anything else.

The entire night she’d been there with them, and every other time she’d hung out with them since (which had only been a handful), he’d listened intently as she yapped on and on. She knew he was listening because he always made sure to ask follow up questions and everything, which turned her on in a way she hadn’t even expected.

“Aw, thanks y’all. You’re all so sweet.” She giggled. Behind her the alarm on the door chimed, letting her know someone had entered the home. 

“Taelor Marie Hastings, come greet me girl!” Isaiah’s voice carried through the foyer and Tae grinned, turning to the phone. 

“I’ll see y’all in a little bit!” She waved goodbye and hung up the call, setting her phone on the kitchen island before taking off to hug her friend. “Zay!”

The two practically leaped into each other’s arms. You would think they lived on opposite sides of the country but nope, just in different boroughs. Tae was a Hell’s Kitchen girlie and Isaiah stayed his ass in Brooklyn, only ever crossing the bridge at night when one of his many boyfriends called him an Uber Black. They talked on the phone nearly every night but if she wanted to see him, she knew she had to go to him. That was fine, he lived near all the good Jamaican food spots anyways.

“Girl, look at you in a little workout set. Body by Tae, huh?” He spun her around, looking her up and down as the bright red biker shorts and matching sports bra with the jacket stood out on her skin tone. Tae wiggled her ass a little as the two of them laughed. “And it smell like cookies, ooh! I love you bad.”

“Where’s Fallon? I thought y’all were coming together?” She asked his back as he beelined for the kitchen and the aforementioned cookies. He didn’t need to answer as Fallon slammed her suitcase on the ground at the entryway.

“This Beis luggage ain’t shit, bro. My arm hurts.” She wiggled her shoulder, letting Tae put her arm around her. Now, they saw each other damn near everyday. The two girls lived less than five blocks from each other and regularly went to each other’s apartments for dinner and some sort of Bravo show. Zay would typically be on the phone to recap what had just happened on their screens.

“C’mon, you can rest it and rejuvenate yourself with a lemon tart.”

“Now you know I can’t resist one of your little lemon tarts.” They both walked into the kitchen, leaving the three bags the two of them brought in, to the side in the foyer.

“Because you are a tart. You are what you eat.” Zay smirked and let Fallon shove him. 

“He’s been starting with me ever since he was supposed to pick me up. My arm hurts because I was standing outside of my place for a half an hour waiting on him!” She picked up the little square treat and let her eyes roll back as soon as she tasted it. 

“I told you, I had an emergency!”

“Suckin’ and fuckin’ on your ex does not constitute as an emergency, Zay.” She retorted and he gasped.

“Don’t go tellin’ my business!”

Tae smiled as she looked at her friends. Fallon had been her randomly assigned roommate freshman year but they got on like a house on fire. Isaiah was the missing piece of their trio, meeting in their English 101 class and cutting up with them in the back all semester long. They had not left each other’s sides since then, initially moving to New York together as roommates in a tiny three bedroom in the Bronx while they got their feet wet in their respective careers. They all felt lucky that by the time they were twenty-five, Tae had her producing job, Isaiah was a licensed psychologist, and Fallon was a highly revered art teacher at a Manhattan private school. 

Staying in the Hamptons had been their idea when they were still living together, finding 115 after one of Fallon’s student’s parents let slip that they rented out their second summer home. They told her that since she was their kid’s favorite teacher, they’d rent it out to her and her friends for a heavily discounted rate, thus launching the search for said friends. Isaiah roped in Charlie and Duke, two of his gym buddies, a lawyer for the Knicks and a physical therapist for the Nets, respectively. Fallon got Jason, a former fling of hers who clearly still wanted her bad and worked as a highly sought after tattoo artist. That left Tae, who got Keith and Amber, two models who were Fashion Week regulars that she had gotten to know through various events she attended in the city. That had been the standing crew for the past four years and it worked well for them - well, at least until this year.

“When are your loverboys getting here?” Isaiah asked, sneaking a second crinkle cookie. Tae gave him the evil eye, both for his words and his actions.

“They’re not my loverboys. One of them won’t even acknowledge my existence.”

“It’s so weird that they’re bringing their girlfriends, I’m sorry. Why set yourselves up for awkwardness like that?” Fallon asked, finishing up her own tart. She opened the fridge and took out the papaya green tea that Tae kept stocked in the fridge, as the two of them could chug gallons of that shit.

“Duke’s fine. Leslie’s nice, I told you we talked at his birthday dinner a couple months back. No grudges, all is Gucci. But Jalen? He can suck my dick.”

“You have such a way with words, Tae.” Isaiah said. She gave him a fake smile and tilted her head. “Your fine ass cousin still coming up too?”

“Ew, yes, ew still. I was just on the phone with him. They’re gonna stop over here before they go to their own place.”

“Ooh yay, Fal, we can ogle him together.” He and Fallon began London Tipton clapping and Tae rolled her eyes at their antics. 

Within the hour, the rest of the housemates filtered in at nearly fifteen minute intervals. The last of them was Jalen, though Tae didn’t realize that as she, Amber and Fallon were sitting outside, checking on the pool. 

“Thank God you called a pool boy because I already have a bikini on and I’m about to jump in right now actually.” Amber was saying as they opened the door, Fallon nodding in agreement. 

“Me too bitch. Lemme go change right now actually.” She held the door for Tae who was grinning, faltering a bit as she spotted Jalen across the kitchen, munching on a chocolate chip cookie and feeding bits of it to his girlfriend, Juliana. He avoided her eyes but Juliana was staring her down and if Tae was being honest, it was damn near sinister.

“Oh you must be Taelor! Jalen has told me so much about you.” She rounded the island, sticking her hand out for the other girl to shake. She was a good five inches taller than her with perfectly done goddess braids and an evil little smirk on her face. “Jay, babe, you didn’t tell me she was so pretty.”

“Ye-yeah, right.” He caught up with her, slipping his arm around her impossibly thin waist. “Hi, Tae.”

“Hi Jay.”

“Oop, Tae and Jay, that’s cute.” Juliana sang. “I hope it’s not weird that I’m gonna be here. He told me you guys had a thing last year but that it was like, just a summer thing?”

The use of the word ‘thing’ was grating on her nerves a bit. “Yup, not a big deal at all. Happy to have you.” Keep it cute, Taelor, she thought to herself.

“Bom!” She turned to plant a huge kiss on Jalen’s lips which Isaiah fake gagged at behind them and Tae simply walked away, resisting the urge to do the same.

The chime on the door rang out again as she headed into the living room where Keith and Jason sat, already playing ESPN on the flatscreen. Her head turned at the sound of Pope’s exclamation of ‘CUZZO!’ and she could literally feel herself begin to fully relax. Her favorite people were in the house, she could temporarily forget Jalen and Juliana for a couple minutes. 

He rushed over to hug her, rocking her back and forth a bit before pulling away. “You good?”

“Better now.” She whispered and he nodded, pulling away so he could dap up the boys. JJ and Rafe were right behind him, with the former giving her a hug first. “Hi J.”

“Hey there, pretty lady. Where’s my lemon tarts?” She laughed at that, wiggling her finger toward the kitchen. He turned to head in that direction, greeting Duke there. Suddenly, that left her face to face with Drew, who was sporting a new buzzcut and arms even bigger than they’d been on FaceTime. 

“Hi, sweetheart.” They also hugged, except his was a bit tighter than JJ's and his large hands settled very comfortably on her lower back, which sent a shiver through her that he undoubtedly felt. He whispered into her ear. “Is Jalen the one standing the kitchen with the curly hair staring into my fucking soul?”

“Probably.” She pulled back with a chuckle though he kept his hands where they were.

“Still want me to play fake boyfriend?” He was smirking down at her as she raised an eyebrow.

“I don’t remember asking you to do that. In fact, I think it was actually you that offered.”

“And you should take me up on that offer because right now, he’s practically got steam coming out of his ears.” She didn’t have to look over at Jalen to know Rafe was probably telling the truth. “C’mon, you can introduce me. Be all coy and shit, so he starts to speculate.” She scoffed but led the way to the kitchen anyway.

“Y’all know Pope, my cousin.” He’d come up at least once every summer, though this was his first time staying in the Hamptons himself, and for more than just the one weekend in their guest room. “This is his roommate JJ.” He waved, mouth full of lemon tart. “And this is ... my friend Rafe.”

His hand was still on her back and he patted it as if to say ‘good girl’. Another shiver. He waved too and everyone began to chat, mingling amongst each other. Jalen stood on the other side of the room again, only this time he was staring her down. Tae bit her lip to hold back a laugh as she looked up at Rafe.

“You play a lot of fake boyfriends? Is that like, your side hustle? You rent yourself out to girls who need a hot guy to pretend to be into them?” She leaned on the kitchen island as he maintained eye contact. 

“Yeah, but I’m not a cheap bitch either so this is gonna run you a lot of money.” Tae let out a cackle and he placed his hand on the other side of her, on the counter, boxing her in a bit. “And who said I’m pretending?”

The eye contact remained for another minute before Isaiah gathered everyone’s attention by the sink. “Jungle juice is done y���all! Champagne, Mtn. Dew, pineapple, mango, freshly cut strawberries, oranges, and kiwis, one whole bottle of tequila and one of coconut rum, all in each. You’re all very welcome!” He stepped aside to reveal a pair of 1 gallon pitchers with spouts, filled with identical liquids and floating fruits. 

“You want some?” Tae asked Rafe who shook his head.

“Nah, I gotta drive those two miscreants to our place still.” He jutted his chin in Pope and JJ’s direction, both of whom were rushing to the pitchers to get their cups filled. Fallon, now clad in a bikini like Amber, approached Tae with a cup of her own. 

“Here you go.” She looked up at Rafe with a grin and her hand extended. “Hi, I’m Fallon, her best friend.”

“Rafe.” He shook her hand.

“Her good friend.” Fallon gave Tae a look that practically screamed ‘we’re gonna talk about this later’. Once everyone had a cup and Rafe had a Celsius from the fridge, Charlie kneeled on a bar stool to deliver his annual first drink of summer speech. 

“Here’s to a summer of good times, impeccable vibes, Tae’s famous breakfasts, Zay’s infamous drinks, Duke’s exhausting workouts, Fallon’s paint and sip afternoons, Amber’s photo dumps with her film camera, Jalen’s hour long showers, Keith’s basketball tournaments, Jason’s phenomenal DJing and my delicious Sunday family dinners. Cheers!”

Everyone shouted in agreement, going for their first sip. Rafe’s hand was still hot on her hip as Tae threw back the drink.

“That boy wants you bad.” Fallon was saying, laying on a towel on the window seat in Tae’s room. Isaiah was perched on the bed and Amber on her own towel on the chair in the corner of the room. Tae was busy unpacking her bag, hanging up her dress for the next day. They were hosting a little day party in the afternoon.

“Girl I was wet just looking at y’all.” Isaiah agreed. “He got eye contact for days and I know how much you like that shit.”

She was glad she wasn’t facing them as the smile on her face would’ve given away just how much she agreed with her friends. “Whatever y’all, he’s just being helpful.”

“Helpful would’ve been him hanging up a picture for you. He wants to put you through a mattress, Tae.” Amber offered this time. 

The boys left after the cheers, rushing to join the rest of their housemates at their house. They were being joined by both JJ and John B’s girlfriend, Kiara and Sarah, with Pope’s girlfriend Cleo coming up the next day. Sarah was apparently also Rafe’s sister. She yet had to meet any of them other than Cleo, who she loved, but they would be attending the party tomorrow.

“Regardless of if he does or not, I’m not getting involved with any more summer flings. My track record clearly sucks.”

“Who says he’s gotta be a summer fling? He can transfer into a fall babe then a winter cuddle and so on.” Fallon said. 

“Right, because that’s what always happens huh?” Retrieving a pair of baggy jeans and a leather corset top from her closet, she turned to her friends. “Are y’all gonna go get ready to go or you gonna sit here and discuss my nonexistent love life?”

They grumbled out responses, filing out to their respective rooms as she shut the door behind them and entered the bathroom.

A couple of hours and some pre-game shots of Don Julio later, the group piled into two separate Ubers. Tae, Zay, Fallon, Amber, and Jason in one, leaving Charlie, Duke, Leslie, Jalen, Juliana, and Keith to ride in the other. They all poured out of the cars twenty minutes later and walked into Hendrix, a beach club that had been their go-to since first coming to the Hamptons. It played the best music, poured the best drinks, and had really good air conditioning, which truly was key. 

At some point, Tae found herself sitting with Leslie as she took puffs of her pen on the back patio of the club, both slightly sweating and just a level above tipsy.

“I told him that maybe we shouldn’t have even come because how awkward was this gonna be for you, ya know?”

“Girl, it’s fine, we were never anything serious and he was very respectful the whole time. Plus, he pays for the house too, he’s entitled to come!”

“Yeah, I guess. You’re mad chill for the situation you’re in.” Leslie took a pull of her pen and then got a little twinkle in your eye. “I guess it’s hard to be awkward when you’ve got that Rafe guy eyeing you up like a piece of meat.”

Tae groaned and threw her head in her hands. “Not you too! Have you been talking to Zay and them?”

“I don’t need to talk to anyone, girl, I have eyes! I thought he was gonna fuck you in that kitchen!”

“Who was gonna fuck who in the kitchen?” The girls both jumped, looking from their seats at Rafe who had quietly approached them. “Hi.”

“Hey.” Tae replied simply.

“I gotta go ... talk to Zay apparently.” Leslie hurried off, leaving the two of them behind on an otherwise empty patio.

“Smooth, Les.” Tae mumbled. “Welcome to Hendrix, you having fun?”

“I was about to then I saw your boy in there with his tongue down his girlfriend’s throat.” Tae rolled her eyes.

“Yeah, they’ve been at it all day.” It was true. Since the boys had left and everyone had dispersed earlier, Jalen had taken Juliana back to his room down the hall from Tae’s and proceeded to have the loudest sex humanly possible. If they were trying to make her jealous, it was not working but it sure was getting on her nerves. They had come down and canoodled on the stairs, done body shots for whatever reason, and had spent the majority of their time at Hendrix wrapped in each other’s arms, working up to, presumably, an indecent exposure charge at this point.

“So were they ones that were gonna fuck in the kitchen?” Rafe smirked as he sat in the seat Leslie had been occupying. He knew exactly what she had said, the glint in his eyes told her as much. 

“Yup, you got it. Right next to the leftover crinkle cookies.”

“Oof, those were fantastic by the way. I wish I had taken more for the road.” 

“Well, we have plenty left back at the house, you’re more than welcome to them.” Tae offered and he smiled back at her.

He leaned forward with his elbows on his thighs, their legs nearly touching. His finger traced over her denim clad knee. “Shit, I’ll go back with you right now for ‘em.”

“Okay, great, let’s go.” She was half-joking, though when he took out his keys and dangled them in front of her she raised an eyebrow. “You drove here?”

“I’m permanent DD.” He paused and shrugged. “I don’t drink, at least nothing more than the occasional beer or glass of wine.”

“Hm. Well, I’m a little drunk so you can drive me home and I’ll give you some cookies.” She caught herself. “The cookies. The cookies.”

“Right.” He stood up from the chair, offering his hand to her. “C’mon then.”

A quick push through the Hendrix crowd to get to her friends, Tae pointed at Rafe and they all began to aggressively give her a thumbs up. He led her out of the club, past her cousin and their friends, and if she had been a little more sober, she might’ve even noticed Jalen watching her leave but she wasn’t so she didn’t.

The cherry red interior was just as plush as she imagined and his playlist was exceptionally crafted, made up of indie pop and some Kaytranada tracks. The ride was quiet as the wind whipped her hair around her face and she thought she’d sobered up a bit by the time they got to 115. However, the staggering she did after he opened her door and helped her out of the car said otherwise. Still, he chuckled and steadied her, keeping that damn hand on her damn back as she walked to the front door and opened it.

Immediately kicking off her mules haphazardly by the steps, she walked straight to the kitchen while he lingered behind her a bit. The crinkle cookies sat in a Pyrex on the island and she popped off the cover to remove two to give to Rafe. She could feel the heat radiating off of him as she walked up behind her.

“Thanks. ‘Preciate it.” When she turned around, they were chest to chest. Damn, he smelled good as fuck! Her breathing picked up, as opposed to his even keeled breaths and when she looked up at him, making that eye contact she really did love so much, Tae wanted to lean in so bad. Their lips were practically already touching. 

“You’re welcome. I’m glad you enjoyed them.” Their lips were centimeters away from one another but he didn’t close the gap. Instead, he whispered.

“I did wanna fuck you in this kitchen today. I’ve wanted to fuck you since that first time you joined us at the bar last year.” The sound Tae let out was somewhere between a whimper and moan. “But not right now. Not when you’re drunk. The first time I kiss you, the first time I make you cum, I want you fully aware and sober, so you can remember all of it. Understand?”

She nodded.

“Use your words.”

“I understand, Rafe.”

He hummed. “Good girl.” 

Rafe took a step back from her, her breathing still heavy and his cologne hanging in the air. He grabbed one of the cookies and took a bite with a smile. 

“Goodnight, sweetheart.” He said, turning to leave the kitchen and then, the house. Tae stood there for a couple more minutes, fanning herself with her hand as she crossed over to the other side of the dark kitchen and grabbed a cup to pour herself some water.

Remembering her Owala sitting on her bedside table, she turned to walk back to the foyer and the stairs, stopping only when she saw her mules neatly sitting at the base of the staircase, waiting for her. Fuck.

[waters-and-the-wilde]

hehe scenario. jupeter coming out the other side of All That with a bit of 'wow you're just straight up a bit codependent but maybe that's actually the best-case scenario for you right now carry on fellas'

oh they've Had Their Talk in the aftermath, and, okay, it's agreed that they are Not Doing Romance because Nureyev needs Time To Grieve and it would be better to Take The Pressure Off Of Being In A Relationship and they will Reevaluate when Nureyev's had a chance to be a guy who doesn't have to worry about where his next meal is coming from. but also Like Hell is Juno just going to Leave Him Alone after all this. and the result is that they spend the Big Crash just. completely unhinged about each other. Nureyev's shot past 'feeling vulnerable around Juno scares the shit out of him' and well into 'raw nerves and gaping wounds and compound trauma and feeling vulnerable about literally anything and everything all the time and being around Juno is integral to not spiraling into the abandonment hell vortex'. meanwhile Juno's like 'holy shit Nureyev is letting me be there for him. this is already incredible progress'

u think they were insufferable on the Carte Blanche well. on the Carte Blanche Nureyev was still working on things like trusting Juno enough to let him back in at all and he Had An Image To Maintain and lots of Private Stuff to Deal With and Juno was still figuring out how not to be a prickly ass all the time and 'when is it appropriate to give your bf his space when your default mode is to Investigate Shit' and none of that is a going concern right now

'sometimes you gotta be a little bit mentally ill to handle the mental illness' they have so much separation anxiety and they are clipping their carabiners together. hooking pinky fingers and following each other when one needs to do something in the next room. where's Nureyev? sitting in Juno's lap again. his ass is experiencing 'nervous system doesn't know how to respond to the sudden removal of constant crushing dread and just goes fucking haywire at unpredictable intervals'. he gets random-ass panic attacks and there's only so much the breathing exercises and the grounding exercises and self-soothing techniques can do compared to 'Juno is here and he's fine and he's safe and he is more than happily providing prolonged physical contact' to get him to calm down on a physiological level

meanwhile Juno's like 'i chased this idiot across half the galaxy because he wouldn't ask for help and had to deal with him being all stone-faced and cold about it, do I look like i mind that he's clingy now? a lady does not need his personal space at this time. a lady is living for this. a lady is also maybe feeling clingy have u considered that'

everyone who isn't rita (idek who. melee? the other vivopolis refugees??) is assuming they are just getting a very bad grade in taking it slow and are barely humoring them about it. and neither bothers with denying the boyfriend allegations but it's not bc it's true it's they're just. too exhausted to get defensive about it

rita: and i mean they ain't actually smooching too loud in the kitchen or whatever

melee probably: he just came out of Juno's room wearing Juno's shirt

juno: he's a thief that's his shirt now

(12 hours earlier:)

nureyev: (shows up to juno's room at 3am) im sorry for waking you i had nightmares about [the bomb/the carte blanche raid/dokana capturing you] i just needed to see that you were alive and make sure im in the reality timeline and then i will go back to-

juno: get in loser we're watching bad cops

rita: hi mista' n do you want some of this blanket

nureyev: that's very kind but im afraid im

juno: yeah hold up he's like really sweaty im gonna get him a clean shirt

nureyev: you really don't need to-

juno: how are you even still standing up when you're shaking like that

nureyev: that is. an excellent question

juno: anyway welcome to the club i fired rita like an hour ago bc i had nightmares about her dying on the asteroid

rita: i had one where i was gettin chased by this big stompy plant monster with lotsa teeth and i had to distract it by throwing all my snacks behind me and then i was outta snacks and then i was up getting more snacks when mista' steel fired me

rita: you know i think only reason i ain't got separation anxiety about mista' steel is because we spent all that time in the ruby together while we were chasin' after you and that gets a gal over it real fast

juno: thanks rita :P