#fuck that old man 2k24!

[charcubed]

I kinda think odds of it happening THIS SEASON may be low since there’s so much left to address in past AND present but ??? hmmm

and yes I see the devil’s minion stuff in there being hinted at but I’m not sure how much further we’ll go down that road until other seasons unfortunately... but where will things leave off with Daniel… idk

[shotmrmiller]

expanding on the konig ask // it turned a bit nsfw sorry

könig would mistake your simple kindness as a crush.

he'd been slightly startled when you gently rapped on his office door to ask him if he wanted a cup of warm caffeine before breakfast since you're already getting one for yourself. (he hasn't a clue that horangi had practically begged for one too.)

then was the one time you'd offered to stitch the tear in his hood. he'd sputtered, completely taken aback by how brazen you'd been. "nein." he'd stiffly walked away apple-cheeked; hands balled into fists in his pockets. (no one knows how to sew for shit, you're the team medic of both bodies and clothing.)

then you bring him an apple pastry. the pencil (könig, please. we are in 2k24 use a pen) snaps in his hand when you choke out, "apfel strudel". his mother tongue rolling off of yours is truly too much and when you leave, he fists himself under his desk with the butchered words echoing inside his head. shame roils in his gut after— post-nut clarity hitting like nothing else— and with a snarl, he wipes the thick cum off of his hand on his pants while using the other to eat the treat that you so kindly baked for him. (the pastry was cold and made of tart green apples which he's hated since he was a lad.)

and now, with your head resting on his padded shoulder, dozing off. his tongue is tied in a knot and there's a lump in his throat because no one's ever really dared to be so forward with him. not only is he a walking pussy deterrent— what with his height and creepy, blank stare— but he's also a colonel; your superior. he can only have him under you in one way and that's under his command. so he makes his choice. once the helo lands back at base, könig taps the side of your helmet with his finger and mutedly asks you to meet him in his office.

"i am flattered, ja? but you must cease this behavior."

"sir?"

he clenches his jaw, crooked teeth gnashing together in determination. he won't let your pretty, round face deter him from his duty to his country, the team, nor you. it simply wouldn't be fair. he's your leader so it's up to him to put a stop to this. könig refuses to acknowledge the look of disappointment on your face. (delusional. you look confused because you literally have no idea what he's talking about.)

"the food—"

"you didn't like it? the apfel strudel?" he chokes on his spit when you say it and turns around to pound at his chest. he doesn't hear how you had told fender to not order that dessert. 'just because it's austrian doesn't mean the colonel will like it.'

he's fortunate to have such a tall backrest on his office chair because his cock is already at half-mast and your dulcet voice reverberating off the plain walls of his small office is doing him no favors. könig stands directly behind it and dismisses you with a wave of his hand and a hoarse command.

how tantalizing you are, so bold to be showcasing your talent in home economics just like a frigatebird puffing its chest out to attract a mate. his grip on the chair tightens, the leather protesting with a soft creak.

it's just a crush. time will erode these frail sentiments you've come to have for him (for him! an old, ugly man whose virginity has practically grown back since the last time he slept with someone was a paid sex worker years ago) and so he'll just ignore them.

(he doesn't. he fucks his pillow every night— jaw trembling and saliva pooling— thinking it's you taking him instead and confuses your s/o as a relative.)

[hiding-from-reality-56]

Blue Hair and Pronouns - Leon Draisaitl

Word Count: 2230 Pairing: Leon Draisaitl x Original Nonbinary Character Rating: Teen and Up (see warnings) Summary: Blake and Leon have been friends for seven years. Leon's fresh off a game-seven loss, and has a month before he's attending Connor McDavid's wedding as one of the Best Men. He also happens to need a date. Tags: Getting together, angst with a happy ending, friends to lovers, fake relationships Warnings: Mentions of intoxication and alcohol (please let me know if I'm missing anything)

Hi, welcome to my submission for the Summer Fic Exchange 2k24, put on by the amazing @wyattjohnston! This fic is written for @nhl-stories, and features a pairing of Leon Draisaitl/Original Nonbinary OC! I've never written RPF with an OC insert, so please be gentle! This was certainly an unforgettable experience, and I'm so glad I tried branching out in my writing! I hope you like it!

“I’m coming, I’m coming, you can stop ringing-” Blake throws open the door with an exasperated sigh. “What are you, six?”

“You were taking forever, I was just making sure you knew I was here. You got my e-transfer?”

Blake rolls their eyes, prepared to retort with ‘Six-year-old behaviour,’ but decides to answer the question anyhow, albeit with a hint of mischief in their tone. “No, you should send it again, make sure I really got it.”

“Nice try, where’s my dog?”

Blake huffs out a laugh, stepping aside to let Leon in. “Probably eating my couch cushions again-” they put up a hand to stop Leon’s retort before it can even leave his mouth, “I know that was “only once,” but we’ve established I’m never letting you live that down. He was taking a post-walk nap, but I doubt he’s still asleep after that.”

After Leon’s toed off his shoes and lined them up neatly on the edge of the mat in the entryway, he follows Blake into the master bedroom, where a somehow still snoring Bowie lays, snuggled up in the exact spot Blake considers their side of the bed.

“Hey Bowie, I missed you,” Leon coos, flopping onto the other side of the bed and pulling the dog to his chest. Suddenly alert, the scruff of brown fur starts yipping excitedly and licking every square inch of Leon’s face he can reach.

Blake stands opposite the bed, observing the reunion with a bright smile. It’s only been a few days since Leon took off for Florida with the team in their quest for the Stanley Cup, the Oilers unfortunately falling short of glory in the end.

The Leon they’d seen on the ice in the dying seconds and in post-game interviews is far removed from the one they’re looking at now - for one, the hideously long ugly beard’s been shorn. The tears and sweat have been wiped away, and an air of happiness has replaced the defeated expression from just yesterday.

“Alright. Traditions are traditions; to the couch!”

The post-playoffs loss “Tipsy Time,” as Blake had dubbed it, became a thing back in 2017. Blake’s Uber had dropped them off at the wrong house, and they were a few too many drinks deep in their post-breakup misery when they’d staggered up the walkway and decided to just relax for a bit on the doorstep before figuring out their way home. They hadn’t been there for long, or at least they’d thought, before the door they were leaning against was being pulled open, and a slightly scowling Leon Draisaitl was looking down at them. Ever the gentleman, he invited Blake in, disregarding their smeared eye makeup and disheveled demeanor. After an impromptu nap on the couch and some water, Blake drunkenly spilled about their latest failed relationship while Leon listened, clearly a little buzzed himself. 

When pressed on why he’d been drinking alone in his home, he roughly mumbled about “playoffs,” and “the fucking Ducks, man,” leading to Blake’s sobering realization that they were in an NHL player’s house. Of course, they’d recognized him when the door had opened, but the reality of it all took a while to sink in. Blake was mortified, as one would expect, rapidly apologized, and tried to leave (which wound up with them on the ground contemplating their shitty depth perception). Leon had insisted they stay until they were “at least sober enough to walk in a straight line,” and sat opposite them on the couch while he nursed his drink and some trashy reality show played in the background. 

Of course, once you’ve drunkenly cried over an ex on Leon Draisaitl’s couch, a connection is formed, whether either party wants it or not. It turned into a very careful escorting down the block, exchanging numbers so Leon would know that Blake hadn’t “died or something,” progressing rapidly into a weekly binge-watch of 90 Day Fiancé, and eventually Blake becoming Bowie’s dog-sitter when Leon was away. It definitely made for an interesting whirlwind of a summer, but the unlikely friendship blossomed like they’d known each other for years.

Blake picks up the shot glasses they’d filled and walks carefully across the floor, sitting gingerly beside Leon and managing to not spill any alcohol. They extend their hand, holding out one of the shots for Leon to take. “So. Game seven. I’m sorry it didn’t go the way you guys wanted.” 

Leon doesn’t answer, just grunts before taking the offered vodka shot from Blake’s hand and downing it without even a slight wince at the burn. 

“Sucks, yeah - nothing we can do about it now. Bigger problems to worry about.”

“You know you’re allowed to be upset about this, right?” Blake places a gentle hand on Leon’s shoulder while flipping through the channels.

Leon shrugs in response, setting the shot glass down on the side table.

“It’s been less than forty-eight hours, you don’t have to pretend everything is fine again.”

“I really can’t worry about it right now. Done enough crying and yelling and swearing down in Florida. Besides, I have to worry about Davo’s wedding now.”

“What do you mean? You just have to show up.”

“I mean there’s the fact that I’m one of his Best Men. And then there’s the issue where I don’t have a date. So I guess what I’m asking is if you’ll come to the wedding as my date. I’ll get lit up if I don’t bring someone.” “So you decided to ask the world’s least gender-conforming weirdo to be your date? Yeah, I can see how that’ll be received so much better,” Blake says wryly.

“Blake, please. I’ll buy you a dress, or a suit, whatever you want to wear, and cover your airfare and accommodations. I’m kinda desperate here.”

“You’re asking someone who was bullied out of hockey the minute they were perceived as different to be your date. At a wedding full of guests who got to live the life I never got to. Do you see why maybe I’m not too interested in being around constant reminders of my own failures?” 

“I’m sorry. I guess I never thought about it that way.”

“Besides, nobody is gonna believe we’re an item anyways. I’m like, the polar opposite of a WAG,” Blake adds, trying to lighten the suddenly sombre mood.

“Blue hair and pronouns has been my type for a while,” Leon replies with a smile.

Blake’s not too sure why that one stung more than it probably had any right to, but the next thing they know, their face hardens and they’re snapping back, “You’re not fucking funny, Leon. Fuck you, go on Tinder or wherever it is you find your one night stands, and take someone from there.” 

Leon opens his mouth, takes one look at Blake, then closes it before crossing the room, sliding on his shoes, and leaving with Bowie hot on his heels.

“I’m gonna kill Leon Draisaitl. Nobody will ever find his body.” 

“You can’t do that, Jade,” Blake replies, tipping their head over the arm of the couch to squint at their best friend. 

“And why the fuck not?” She sounds far more affronted than Blake had initially thought she would be. Which, valid - the pair has been through a lot in the last few years, and Blake wouldn’t hesitate to punch someone for Jade. So they suppose it makes sense that Jade would be ready to commit murder for them.

“Because he’s like the second most popular guy in the city, and him being dead would seriously fuck with the Oilers’ dynamic.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

“I appreciate the offer, though. Shit, hang on. Speak of the devil,” Blake rolls their eyes, holding up their phone to show Jade Leon’s caller ID. They hold a finger up to their lips and swipe to answer. “What do you want, Leon.” Blake winces at the bite in their own tone, not expecting to sound this aggressive. It’s been less than twenty-four hours since the argument, but Blake still feels a little bad for the way they’d snapped.

“Hey. I’m- uh. I just wanted to apologize for last night. I shouldn’t have said that, it wasn’t right. I’m also sorry that I didn’t stop to consider why you might not want to go, and I get it if you don’t want to. I guess what I’m trying to say is, the wedding’s in a month, just- let me know if you change your mind, alright?”

“I appreciate the apology, but I think I’m gonna need some time to think about it. I know you didn’t mean to hurt me, but it still did hurt. I’m also sorry for yelling at you, there’s probably a better way that I could’ve responded. But yeah, let me sleep on it for a bit, okay?”

“You were more than justified to yell at me the way you did. I crossed a pretty big line. Take care of yourself, alright? I’m sorry again.”

Blake hangs up after a quick goodbye and drops their phone onto the rug. “You don’t have to kill him, Jade. I’m still hurt but he acknowledged his mistake and his apology felt genuine. And he’s never said anything like that before. I dunno. But enough about me, let’s order a pizza and watch sad movies,” Blake smiles.

Blake calls Leon back a week and a half later to accept his offer. Fuck it, what’s the worst that could happen? 

They’d tried to insist on paying for their own flight, but Leon simply emailed them a flight confirmation five minutes later with nothing but “Oops.” in the body.

Fast-forward a couple weeks, several hours of trying on clothes, six arguments about who was allowed to pay for what, and a four-hour flight, Blake is standing in the most gorgeous wedding venue. They’re having a wonderfully animated discussion with Leon and Derek Ryan about the Olympics when their next point is interrupted.

“Blake?” 

They stop mid-sentence, they’d know that voice anywhere. They turn around to confirm, and a huge smile breaks out across their face. “Oh my god, everyone shut up, my bestie is here,” they gasp, running forward to scoop the owner of the voice up into an excited hug. Blake does a little spin before setting their friend down again. 

“Kailer!!!!! It’s been sooo long! I missed you this season, you should come back so I can tell people I’m taller than an Oiler again.”

Kailer straightens his tie and sighs dramatically. “You’re taller than Hammer, you’ll survive.” 

“Hammer’s a child, he doesn’t count.”

“He’s not even a year younger than me, and you know that,” Kailer replies with an exaggerated eye roll. “So I see you and Leon got your shit together, then,” he continues with a shit-eating grin. Blake is confused for a moment, before remembering they came to this thing with Leon. Confusion must’ve shown on their face, because Kailer groans. “If I can figure out a proposal, surely you guys can work out whatever the hell it is you have going on between you.”

“There’s nothing ‘going on’ between us, we’re just friends,” Blake insists. Kailer gives them a ‘sure, bud,’ look, and seems like he’s going to retort with something, when his fiancée comes over with a glass of champagne in hand.

“Bailey, oh my god, you’re such a sight for sore eyes,” Blake exclaims, opening their arms excitedly. Kailer holds out a hand to take Bailey’s drink so the pair can embrace. 

“Congrats on the engagement, you guys are so gross and in love and I couldn’t be more excited for you,” Blake rambles as they pull away. “Show me the ring?”

Bailey blushes happily and extends her hand to show off the frankly enormous rock sparkling on her finger. 

“Damn, Yamo, you picked well,” Blake whistles in appreciation.

“I sure did,” he replies with a bright smile, but somehow Blake doesn’t think he’s referring to the ring.

“I’ll let you two go now, apparently Foegs is supposed to be floating around here somewhere, and Leon promised me he’d get him to find us so I can bug him and Alex,” Blake grins, opening their arms for one more quick hug from both of them before turning back to Leon.

After a beautiful ceremony, several speeches, and an amazing dinner, Leon holds out a hand, inviting Blake to dance. It’s a slow song, and Blake can’t help but rest their head on Leon’s shoulder as they move gracefully, every movement seamless like they’re made for each other.

Leon pulls Blake in after a twirl, holding their gaze with what can only be described as genuine fondness. Blake feels their cheeks warm, but doesn’t break eye contact. Leon leans down, and their lips are so close, they can feel his warm breath on their face as he speaks, “I was serious, you know.”

“About what,” Blake asks breathlessly. They might actually pass out if what they think is about to happen does. 

“Blue hair and pronouns being my type,” Leon murmurs with a grin. Blake huffs out a quiet laugh. So he had meant what he’d said last month - just not in the way Blake had interpreted it. Either way, Kailer will be glad they’re figuring their shit out, or whatever he’d said. 

“Shut up and kiss me,” they breathe. And he does.

[luvdive]

✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ* wanted connections *･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ✧

some of these are romantic, some are platonic, some could go either way. if you’re interested in any of them, give this post a little like & i’ll come ask you about it!! the ones with a little ✨ next to them are the ones i’m most interested in!!

woo wonjae ✨

i don’t have as much to write for this one lmao. from the age of 16 to 22, wonjae was an illegal underground fighter who people only ever knew as 'boy' because he wouldn't tell anyone his name. he's a loved up househusband now but i want to do more stuff from when he was a street fighter !!!

woo nawon

again now much to say on this one lmao she's interning at her dad's entertainment company i just want her to have industry friends

kim chaerim

hi can i get a boyfriend for chaerim that’s just as directionless as she is?? bonus points if he’s a musician like her & they can just have cliché jam sessions together. alternate plot, because she’s a stubborn Indie Chick™ can i get a bf for her that’s the ceo of an entertainment company or something?? someone that’s linked to the music industry but in a way that she wouldn’t jump at the chance to get a record deal u know??

jung seri ✨

seri is a full time nanny stuck in a relationship with a man that doesn't appreciate her. pspsps a single dad who needs a nanny? cue them flirting with each other (intentionally or unintentionally) until seri realises actually maybe he treats her better than her bf does

sasha shepard

mass effect. mass effect!! mass effect!!! mass effect canons, mass effect ocs, other shepards, aliens with no affiliation to the mass effect universe i don’t fucking care i just love mass effect & i want to do things with sasha already

yi wonju

tw death wonju is a pansori singer first and a witch second!! her husband was her gosu but he died </3 and now she's in need of a new one. must be okay with killing people but living forever as a result xoxo

sadie hwang

tw death lowkey based on you've reached sam & some story i saw on r/nosleep once. sadie's boyfriend died in a car accident & now every friday he calls her and she tries to save him. maybe your muse is one of her friends and is worried about her, maybe they're a new love interest, maybe if we plot it out really well they're her dead boyfriend???

kim eunji

get eunji a boyfriend 2k24 that's all

nam sangchul ✨

tw super junior fc sangchul’s former members!! tl;dr sangchul was the maknae of a boy group called attention when he was 18 until he got into a car accident & after a year of being unhappy he decided to leave the group. it’s been sixteen years & he’s managed to find something that works for him but!!! please god imagine threads w/ him & the rest of attention!! we can decide how successful they were or weren’t, whether they’re still together now or whether they disbanded, all that fun stuff

bong sungmin

ahem celebrity friends with benefits plot?? except maybe your muse catches feelings & sungmin doesn’t know how to deal with that because maybe he’s catching feelings too & trying to pretend he isn’t 🤧

shin raewon pt.1

i’m just a big old sucker for regular customer plots so like?? a girl ( or maybe a guy u know, try and catch him off guard ) that’s been coming to the cafe since it opened & knows all the staff and is just super nice & non-creepy and yeah that’s all i got man

shin raewon pt.2

raewon works at a yaoi cafe and i want coworkers for him that’s it that’s the connection. give him work pals to hang out with away from the cafe, work pals to bitch about weird customers with & gossip about customers they think are Hot™ ( except don’t let his gf find out about that bit lmao ) 

park seunghyun ✨

if you’ve seen cherry magic that’s a bonus but the tl;dr is u get magic powers if ur still a virgin by the time u turn 30. enter seunghyun, our 30 year old virgin. once again the opportunities are plentiful. nosy colleagues, overbearing family members, someone to deflower him, take your pick

aloïs fournier ✨

god how does anyone not know what’s coming for this one i have posted about it 9000 times ever since this stupid cb was announced. A SET OF CONNECTED TBZ MUSES BASED ON THE CONCEPT FOR THE STEALER BUT INSTEAD OF THIS STEALING HEARTS PUSSY SHIT THEY’RE JUST REGULAR CAREER CRIMINALS!!! aloïs is ur resident diamond thief & he’s ready 2 be in a criminal gang

bae seolwoo

tw super junior fc he's divorced! he's a high functioning alcoholic! he's a deadbeat dad! he's the perfect candidate for a university student with terrible taste in men! to talk in fanfic/booktok terms, a sappy grumpy/sunshine cliche. it doesn't have to be a university student (he's a lecturer, that's bad!) but no one in their 30s is going to tolerate him if we're being honest

kwon sanggyun ✨

sanggyun hunts monsters with his besties but only because his main bestie is super hot & sanggyun's in love with him. except seungmin (the bff) has a boyfriend or whatever ugh. what if a cunning shapeshifter pretended to be seungmin & sanggyun was none the wiser???

[cinematicendevaourz]

"Memoir Of A Snail" is the most disappointing claymation film I've seen - and I grew up watching Gumby re-runs. Thank fuck for Aardman ! Adam Elliot's joint uses claymation as a vehicle to get a chick flick narrative across about a plain jane who goes through a series of unfortunate events after she is orphaned and separated from her brother through the foster system. The old Cuban woman was cool, a foil to keep the main alive as she lives through her odessey and her brother was great too - a rebellious youth looking to escape a foster home that is a front for a sweatshop and an Abrahamic cult. This character, Gilbert Pudel, happened to be homosexual. The main, Grace Pudel, happened to live with foster parents who were nudist colony members. And then there was a homeless man who got disbarred because he was masturbating during a court session. Sexual themes used for shock and humor just didn't feel right wielded in Adam Elliot's hands. But this is what a majority of the film was based on. Without it, "Memoir Of A Snail" would be as boring as Grace laying in bed eating fish sandwiches all day wondering why she was a virgin until late in her autobiography. Some tales just shouldn't be told. Even the snail Sylvia races as fast as she could to get out of earshot as Grace goes over her narrative to her.

The saddest part of the melancholic pity party though is that Sylvia gets off screen before the credits run, while audience stays transfixed by a trainwreck in claymation - which when proposed sounds way better ideally than what "Memoir Of A Snail" actually is.

-

C.V.R. The Bard

16th/Nov.2k24

[depressedhouseplant]

Just Fucking Write 2k24 - Day 14

Prompt: Felix’s boyfriend is a serial cheater so clearly the best revenge is fucking his dad

A/N: I never intended on having a sequel / continuation for this fic, but have a little sneak peek into what happened

“So are you going to tell me why you brought me to this restaurant? The one you brought me to on our first date when it’s not our anniversary?” Felix asked. He watched Chris shift in his seat.

“I know our age difference is…sizable,” Chris began.

“Twenty four years, eleven months, and thirteen days,” Felix interjected. “The internet told me.”

“Thank you internet,” Chris chuckled. Felix watched as Chris relaxed a little.

“Sorry I interrupted. Please continue,” Felix said.

“And I know you’ve just started your graduate program so you are still in school, but I’ve given this a lot of thought,” Chris continued.

“Chris, are you proposing?” Felix studied the older man closely.

“Yes, I am. I absolutely adore you and want to be with you forever even though I know you’ve got an entirely different set of priorities than I do, but I can’t see myself with anyone else,” he let out. Chris produced a small box from his pocket and opened it. Inside was a diamond encrusted band ring. “Felix Lee, will you marry me?”

Felix was out of his seat and kissing Chris before either of them fully registered what was going on.

“Yes, of course I’ll marry you. Why would you ever think I wouldn’t?” he asked as Chris slid the ring on Felix’s finger.

“I know you’ll find this hard to believe, but I do have some insecurities. Like the fact my boyfriend-,”

“Fiancé,” Felix corrected.

“Like the fact my fiancé was my son’s ex-boyfriend and is therefore young enough to be my son,” Chris replied.

“That’s funny, I brag about how I met my fiance through my ex,” Felix grinned.

“You’re too much,” Chris shook his head.

“What? Can’t keep up with me any more, old man?” Felix teased.

“If I didn’t want to actually eat I’d say we leave now to consummate our engagement,” Chris said.

“Ahem,”

They looked over to see the waitress staring at them. It was then Felix realized he was still in Chris’s lap.

“How about to go?” Chris suggested.

“Good idea,” Felix agreed.

[kindchenschema]

even their canon ones get sloppy treatment like helm/yasuda? incredible was a waste (why is helm even still there they clearly don’t give af about her) and monica/amelia never gave anything but blah. although i would take blah over the winston shit that was horrible. ik ur rejoicing 😭 bc you want kaimelia back and i love that for you (would love someone other than cristina to uphold their child free stance but im rooting for them resolve the kid thing) but i also don’t trust the writers not to slip a male in there while amelia ‘figures’ things out for like, that bisexual ‘rep’ or something idk. just a vibe i get.

also i so agree about catherine. they’ve always written her as cartoonishly evil but the actress pulls it off so well. everyone hates her but mean women are sexy sustain me and she’s never shit on my fave so she’s okay in my book idc lol. i kinda found everyone else boring this ep. jo/link esp. they need to be written off sooo badly because literally who gives a fuck. duller than dirt and idgaf about their fetus either like but other than zola and tuck, the kids on this show add absolutely nothing. 2/3

i'm honestly not that offended at how they treat lesbian ships because isn't that just... how they treat everything? bc the writing sucks and they won't touch the very sensible advice of "follow through with a storyline" with a ten foot pole. so

(but i think that's because 95% of my ships have never been canon and never will be, so i'm used to it. let's face it i'm simply more enlightened than the writers 😌)

oh girl i was cackling... i mean as a lesbian i was like damn y'all really baited us for the whole season (well they did like. the bare minimum. but) just to have her end up with this man .. like hmm okay supercorp if it did not slay and they had no chemistry and you bought katie mcgrath from wish

yes, back in s19 i fully believed they would resolve the kid thing. because i mean kaimelia's whole thing is that they're not an "ordinary" couple, like with amelia's speech to teddy about things not needing to be defined in order to be loved etc. like, scout already has two parents, sure it wouldn't be the traditional way of doing things but just bc you're dating someone who's a mom doesn't mean you also need to become a mom/dad. imo at least (but i know literally nothing and maybe this is wishful thinking because i'm only into 45 year olds)

you're so right, like nobody wants to watch that 😭 let amelia shepherd eat pussy 2k24 !

i'm like very anti-children and i hate that all my favs have kids EXCEPT for meredith/zola. i love zola. ever since she came onto the show she was the only kid i could tolerate and i grew to love her even. like she was sooo cute, so smart, never caused any trouble, i loved her adoption storyline, and now as a tween/teen she's also super adorable and a GENIUS like hello?? she rlly became a fav of mine these recent seasons because of the giftedness storyline and how the actress pulled it off (PLUS she's the OG merluca hater like it was sooo funny how much she hated his guts and ALSO inch resting how, when addison visited, she was super sweet and kind to her like ok zola really said meddison rights ! )

tldr she's just the superior grey's kid 🙌

[bratdykebarbie]

🔪 age in bio 🔪

transmisogynists fix your hearts or die 🫀🔪

🛑 pls leave me alone if you are a MINOR (i prefer if you’re over 21), a terf and/or transmisogynist of any kind, a radfem, a transandrophobia ~tRuThEr~, an ED/self-injury blog, a Zionist/racist/general shithead, or a sissy/tr*p blog run by a cis man 🛑

💖💕💖💕💖💕💖💕💖💕💖

hi I’m bratdykebarbie 🍒🐰

(formerly cherryykitten, cherryybunny)

cherry/Barbie/anything sweet

late 20s lesbian femme dyke, US, she/they, TME

not a girl but not, like, NOT a girl

bratty bottom sub baby

taken, collared, owned by the best Mommy and dreaming of wife life

trans girls I love you beyond words, i will always do my very best to cultivate this space to be safe and comfortable and full of love for y’all

couple of random things—

I follow/send asks/like from sa*************ht

header art is “The Mortal and the Goddess” by Relm of RelmArtist 🌸

“my gender is just left of girl” post by the lovely @femmedummy (formerly femmeidiot)

you can block posts w/ mommy content by blacklisting the tag “#mommyposting 💓”

you can ask me anything, I love y’all 💖

(updated 1/22/25)

rules/dni, kinks/likes, and tags under the cut ⬇️💖

some preferences even though I don’t think anyone reads them:

❤️ put ur age in ur bio ❤️

❌ no minors/under 21/TERFs/transmisogynists/other bigots/cishets/Nazis/gross old men w/ stolen porn blogs/etc ❌

❌ no “afab transfem” shit/no TME ppl who call themselves transfem(me), no ~transandrophobia truther~ losers, no transmisogynists of any flavor, fix your shit ❌

❌ no non-transfem sissy/cd/trap blogs ❌

❌ pls don’t follow if you post any extreme cnc/violence, actual non-consent, pedophilia, the word r*pe, gore, thinspo, self-harm, anything with blood (vampire stuff is fine), “icky kiddo” stuff, actual incest, scat/emeto, gun play, drowning/suffocation, necro, bestiality (furries incl sexual are fine), or gaslighting/kidnapping/extreme psychological stuff ��

❌ absolutely no fucking TERFs/rAdFeM/“gender critical” bullshit, get the fuck off my blog and genuinely please fix your hearts or die ❌

🩷: being a brat, loving degradation, breeding, sucking girls’ dicks, “Mommy” as a title, dirty talk, being slapped, and being choked

want to try 🤔: Shibari/rope/bondage, light somno, being shared/passed around, proper spanking, free use, leashes,

I 👎

💚 kinks/things I like & post fairly often 💚

—“good girl”, brat play, breeding*, sucking girls’ dicks, cum/swallowing/facials, teasing, dirty talk/talking me through an orgasm, overstim, “mommy” as a title, gentle/soft domination, loving degradation, hickeys/bruises/marks/scratching/biting, the words “cunt”/“pussy”/“cock”/“dick”/“hole”, the word “little”**, being gagged, being called “baby”, using the vibe during, collars, being called bunny/kitten/puppy/pet, having my ass smacked during, taking pictures, making audios, face slapping,

* NOT pregnancy but “I’m gonna put a baby in you/knock you up” is 🥵

** “little slut”, “little pet”, “little angel”, “[perfect/precious/sweet/good/etc] little [noun]”

⚠️ things I like a little/in concept and want to explore/do more & don’t post as much ⚠️

—free use, light spanking/impact, bondage/shibari, bigger toys, service topping, giving prostate orgasms, VERY light somno (sleepy but not asleep), leashes, being recorded, “daddy” as a title, being passed around by more than one girl at a time

🏷️ tags (need updating) 🏷️

horny text posts - #bratdykebarbie.txt; also #cherryykitten.txt and #cherryybunny.txt 💞

miscellaneous/personal text posts - #bratdykebarbie.misc; also #cherryykitten.misc and #cherryybunny.misc ✏️

any pics I post - #bratdykebarbie.jpg; also #cherryykitten.jpg and #cherryybunny.jpg 📸

posts from Dyke Week 2024, spent with 2 tumblr friends and full of the hottest nastiest gay sex - ​#dyke week 2k24 💖🌈🍊🐰🐝🌈💖

asks and submissions—

#bratdykebarbie asks / #bratdykebarbie subs

old asks/submissions—

#cherrybunny asks / #cherryybunny submissions

&

#cherrykitten asks / #cherryykitten submissions

〰️ this section was last updated 12/17/2024 〰️