#fuck streaming services it's a pirates life for me

[sylvthara]

so that watcher news huh

[parkercore-69]

me offhandedly telling a friend that i’d really like to get a few of the saw dvds from cex to add to my dvd collection but being unable to due to complications with being a minor who can’t by 18s alone, to which she responded ��yeah but is it really a matter of life or death??” while i sat mouth agape gawking at the audacity she had to say such a thing.

[angel-of-the-moons]

A Benevolent Hand

Khonshu x Fem!Moon Knight!Reader

TW/CW: NSFW, Smut, masturbation (Fem), fingering, dirty talking, degradation(?), Khonshu wants to actually fuck you but won't admit it because he's a prideful shithead

MINORS DNI I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR CONTENT YOU CONSUME

A/N: did I stay up until ten last 4am to spit this shit out? Enjoy whatever horny poetry my sleep deprived brain supplies you. Be free, my horny little doves *yeets y'all into a field*

Also idk why but this gif does things to me

🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑

It was a dull, dead night. There were no evildoers to stop, no killers to send to the sands of the Duat.

Even Badr told you to go home and rest, you deserved it after your diligent work and devotion to your god.

But, of course... "settling in" for the night wasn't something you know how to do anymore.

You've been Moon Knight for so long you weren't even sure what normal people did during quiet nights at home, anymore.

You ate, showered, exercised in the cramped space of your seedy apartment, before sitting on the couch to idly flip through channels, clicking your tongue and reminding yourself to sign up for some streaming services or pirate some stuff at the local library.

You were so bored you settled on an old corny horror film from the 80s, R-Rated and strangely enough, uncensored. But then again, adult channels were still a thing apparently, so you settled in for some cheap blood and guts, stupid busty camp counselors and a masked killer.

But of course, the sex scenes were there, as well. It didn't show anything like porn would, but the actors did a good job of "having" sex beneath the covers, their bodies flushed and sweaty as they went at it like rabbits, panting and saying things to each other in shared breaths.

They were gonna die, that's how these things went. You have sex in a horror movie, you die. The psychos from Scream got that part right about the ole cliché.

But... The way they acted with each other, playing out the part of a couple very much in love and very horny had you... bothered.

You craved that kind of intimacy. Sure, you can go out and find someone to hook up with, have a forgettable one night stand with some idiot at a bar... but it didn't have the physical closeness that was acted out on the cheap flat screen in front of you.

Being a Fist of Khonshu was often lonely life. You couldn't engage in the seeming frivolity of a relationship that was seen every day you walked down the street. No bed warmed by another body, no good morning kisses, no... love?

You shoved those melancholy feelings aside for now, deciding to focus on the throbbing heat blossoming between your legs.

You bit your lip and slid your hand down your front, slipping it beneath the waistband of your pajamas and beneath your underwear, touching the slick wetness that began to coat and soak through the fabric covering you as the movie droned on.

Your fingers slowly started circling your clit as you breathed out a hot puff of air, eyes closing momentarily as you imagined it.

You, with a man who was head over heels with you, tangled up in the sheets.

Sweaty, groping hands pawing at slick skin, tongues dancing as you kissed like you were all the two of you needed to breathe--

Your fingers began to increase their movements, gathering your sweet juices on your fingers to lubricate your clit as you circled with more need.

You dropped your head onto the back of your couch with a pathetic groan, eyes closing as you let the mental image take a better shape, using the sounds from the TV to help mold the scene for you and your faceless, imaginary lover.

You grunted and kicked off your bottoms and underwear, discarding them on the floor as you spread your legs, one foot resting on the cushion to allow better access as your other hand groped at your breast over the fabric of your threadbare tank top.

"Fuck." You cursed aloud to yourself, falling back into your fantasy as your fingers played with your wet, puffed folds.

Your lover would slowly slink down your body, his lips and tongue pressing on your skin until his mouth reached your hip bones.

He would kiss your clit before licking up your slit, his tongue teasing your entrance, tracing it before he wrapped his lips around the bundle of nerves at the top.

You let out a heady moan, your toes curling as you held back the urge to plunge your fingers inside of you; for now settling on focusing your attention on your twitching clit.

You roll your hips in time with your hand, sliding your hand beneath your top to squeeze your breasts and roll your nipple between your fingertips.

Your lover would lick, kiss, nip, and tease you. He would rut his nose against your clit as his tongue--

Your mental fantasy bubble popped when you felt a very large, very warm, and very real hand slide down your torso, leaving a blazing trail beneath your skin in its wake.

"I sometimes forget how often mortals have these urges." The deep, raspy voice that the hand belonged to sighed out, his tone dripping with... disappointment? Boredom?

You snatch your hand away from your core and instinctively try to close your legs, to conceal your shame as the ancient being crowded around you, the dry smell of sand and spices assaulting your nose as his heat threatened to overwhelm you as he leaned over the back of the couch.

"K-Khonshu--!" You sputter, almost gawking as his bare hand slides to replace yours, his large, thick fingers spreading your lips and gathering your wetness on his digits.

"A rather needy thing, aren't you?" His voice murmured, almost a humored huff coming from him as his thumb circled your clit, sending bolts of pleasure jolt up your spine.

You bite your lip to stifle the whimper that wanted to come out; shame blending in an intoxicating cocktail as your very ethereal and otherworldly benefactor began to pick up where you left off.

"You were being so loud a moment ago." He chastised, his fingers moving very quickly over your clit, his mind focused on how the little nub was swollen and twitched beneath his grasp.

"Don't bother concealing it from me, now, you needy little thing. You're like a cat in heat, right now." You could feel his voice rumble through your, your bones trembling and the deep baritone vibrating your clit as your hand gripped weakly at his forearm.

Your stubborn pride told you not to, not to give in, that this was probably one of the most shameful things a god could catch their follower doing, but...

Most gods wouldn't participate, now would they? Surely, they would chastise you, or walk away and leave you alone to tend to yourself.

When you didn't comply, he grunted and pulled his hand away, your dripping cunt lamenting the loss of his warm touch; hips chasing him for more.

The characters in the movie long moved past the intense love-making between the protagonists. One of them screamed as they found the dead body of one of their friends.

"Disobedient little runt. I will not give you what you want so easily, especially not if you defy me."

The threat was cold, and... oh, fuck it.

"I--I'm sorry." You whimpered, your head dropping back once more, this time hitting the stiff bicep of his other arm he used to brace himself on the couch.

"Good girl." He purred, his hand once more resuming his cruel, blissful torture.

You hiccuped and moaned, rolling your hips once more, this time into the touch of another as heat bloomed low in your belly; molten lava creeping through your veins like thick molasses.

Your chest heaved as his other arm curled around you, his hand taking the soft weight of your breast into his palm, kneading the mound of flesh and pulling your nipple in perfect synchronicity with his other.

"Oh, ffuuuh--" You panted, your body caged from behind as the ancient deity whose age was beyond counting helped you rub one out on your dingey, shitty couch in the dead of night.

You felt your womb throb, wanting desperately to have something inside--

"Poor thing." Khonshu tsk'd. "Could you not find someone--something--to satisfy you? Here you are, rutting against my hand like it is all you know how to do. Pathetic."

You moaned louder this time, arching your back at the words he spat at you. You weren't one for this kind of dirty talk... but having it come from him had your head spinning like you had just gotten off of the tilt-a-whirl on Coney Island--but in a sinfully delicious way.

"Perhaps I should have left you alone. You seemed quite consumed by your little fantasy." He mused, his thumb pressing so hard against your clit that it had you seeing stars behind your eyelids.

"What were you imagining, little dove?" He rasped lowly, the dry, smooth side of his beak sweeping against you, feeling almost cool to your blazing cheek as you leaned into it.

"A nobody? Playing house with you? Laying you down in bed and devouring you like a banquet, perhaps?"

Oh, little did he know how close to the truth he actually was.

Or maybe he did know, and was using it to merely drive you over that mind-numbing precipice you wanted so desperately to fling yourself off of?

You could never tell with him, not when he was playing his mind games.

"I... Uh--ah--" You whine.

Khonshu's fingers pull up enough to slap your clit, the sudden feeling making your body jerk against him as the sound of your went cunt was heard even over the volume of your forgotten movie.

"I am reciting rhetoric. I will talk, and you will listen." He growls, his hand sliding down, his palm grinding against your clit as his fingers toy with your fluttering entrance.

Oh, you were so close, so fucking close. If he would just--

"I don't understand how mortals can function when urges like these are so strong." He sighed boredly, as if he wasn't currently fucking you with his hand, teasing your needy hole but not giving what you were truly craving...

"You are destined for more than a pathetic little house with a yard and a garden. You were meant to carry out my will."

That irked you, deep down. Yes, you knew attaining that very thing was highly unlikely for you, but he didn't have to insult you for fantasizing about being normal.

"F-fuck you." You managed to spit out, eyes crossing as they rolled back into your skull, your voice lacking the conviction and venom you wanted it to.

"You seem to be doing just that, my dear." He tipped his head to the side in a jerking motion.

He gave you not a moment to ponder his words as he hooked a thick finger inside of you, curving upwards and pressing hard against that textured spot inside your spongy walls, making you cry out and lift your hips off of the couch

"...In a manner of speaking." He sighed, pumping his finger in and out, paying extra attention to that oh so delicious spot within you, mapping out your very insides with methodical precision, quickly finding the method to get the best reactions out of you as your walls clenched down around him.

"Look at you, so desperate that you are letting me do this to you." Khonshu mocked softly, a chuckle coming from him as his fingers plucked your nipple and his palm ground hard onto your clit.

"Do you like this? Your god giving you such special attention?"

You keened, panting hard as your orgasm began to swell, each pulsing wave battering down the shores of pride and resolve you had struggled to build over the years of serving out the will of this... god.

"Ah... You are close, are you not?" He teased you, "Let's see..."

He managed to slip another finger inside of you, a groan actually rumbling out of him. You never thought you'd heard a sound like that from him.

But then again, you never expected him to finger-fuck you in your own couch before, either.

"You're tight, little bird." He growled, his voice strained as he scissored his fingers in and out of you, shoving you forcefully to the edge of the shores of your oblivion.

"When was the last time you bedded anyone other than your own hand? Months? Years?" He huffed, pumping them in and out of you rapidly, now.

You were so close you could feel the waters of sybaritism that you could taste the very petals of a lotus on the tip of your tongue.

"No wonder you have been so testy as of late."

Almost.

So close.

Just a bit more!

He leaned over, holding you to him almost like a child clutching a beloved toy; only it was far from something so innocent as you ride his hand like your life depended on it.

Your mouth open, your tongue just barely peaking over your bottom lip as you finally dove into the warm waters, silently waiting for the petals of a lotus to fall onto the wet, writhing muscle; drowning in each drop as your orgasm dragged you out to tide, drowning you as your god dabbled with your most intimate parts in such hedonistic fashion.

You were so lost in your post-coital haze that you didn't even register his hand leaving you until his body retracted; leaving you bereft of his warmth.

You turned your head in time, your eyes bleary, blood-shot and faraway as you watched him turn, toying with the sticky wetness coating his skin.

"Don't fall into this trap again, little dove." The god of the moon tells you over his shoulder, before disappearing in a cloud of mist.

But most certainly not before you had taken notice of the prominent bulge beneath his bandages and robes...

[monstersw1thv1bes]

the AUDACITY of thinking starting a streaming service is the move here. like, I get that maybe YouTube isn't the place for watcher anymore, but then put your content on another place that already exists, don't create yet another subscription based streaming service. we don't need more of them.

gonna just say it: pirating is completely morally sound in this day and age. the ONLY reason I was willing to stop doing it at any point was because Netflix came along and put all the content I wanted to watch in ONE (1) place, which was convenient for me so I was willing to pay for it. before that if a show was on TV and I missed it because, you know, I had a life, I'd download or have my grandfather record it for me on his VCR (yeah, ig im getting old).

Hundreds of different streaming services are not convenient, and I'm not paying for a whole other subscription (I already have 2 and honestly that's too many) just so I can watch content made by TWO GUYS (sorry Steven. you seem nice but I'm just not that into you).

Also, removing content from YouTube that has been free and available on there the whole time until now is straight up just a scummy move.

I don't even wish the Watcher guys the best with this. They could have done literally anything else without being capitalist scumbags. I hope this whole idea goes up in flames, because this is the most bullshit idea ever and if we as consumers keep going along with all these subscription-based models, this is going to be a continuing trend (like it already is but people don't seem to realize that it'll stop happening once it stops being profitable. they just complain and still pay for it). and fuck that.

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Homesick

Frustrated by the lack of any solution to her not so little tadpole problem, Selene Longsong receives comfort from an unexpected source---Rolan. SFW.

Selene Longsong yelled, tears streaming down her pale red cheeks and tail wagging behind her. She then picked up yet another rock and threw it into the water. After a truly depressing dinner with her companions, she explained that she needed some time alone to “process everything.”

Process.

Process that so far, we’ve found no cure. That Nettie had a bloody branch coated in a lethal toxin in case I didn’t tell her everything.

WHICH I DID BECAUSE I THOUGHT HEALERS ARE SUPPOSED TO HEAL. FUCK ME, I GUESS!

“FUCK!”

“A good evening to you too.”

WHAT?!?!?

Selene turned suddenly around to see quite possibly the last person I expected to see. “Rolan.” She sniffled, wiping her eyes. “I, um, didn’t hear you coming.”

He rolled his eyes. “Well, it must be hard to hear among the screaming and splashes.” Any bravado and humor he might have had disappeared as he observed her. “Are you alright?”

He looks worried.

Can I trust him?

Should I trust him?

Or will he—

He tentatively stepped towards her, holding out one of his hands. “If I might be of any service, my friend, then please—”

Her lower lip quivered as more tears fell. “Rolan…I just want to go home…”

“I know, my dear. I know.”

Between his sad smile, tender tone, and kind eyes, Selene allowed herself to let go for the first time since she was abducted and began to weep. Rolan immediately took her hand, and with his other arm around her thick waist, he led her to a nearby bench. “There, there. There, there. Why don’t we sit down?” He murmured softly, and she felt herself practically melting in his hold.

After they settled on the bench, I’m not letting go of his hand. Feels too nice. And he smells nice. “I’m sorry. I…” Sorry, it’s been a shit in a shit week. “I just want to go home…”

Home.

Mum and Dad.

My cat.

My friends.

Brownies.

Where there’s no tadpoles or racist druids or cults…

“You said home is Baldur’s Gate, did you not?” He asked as he squeezed her hand. “Do you have family there?”

She nodded. “My parents. Mum’s a cook at Wildheart Manor. Dad runs his gran’s bakery, where I work in between adventuring jobs.” Finally stopped crying. Thank gods. “Though he wasn’t always a baker.” She smiled and squeezed his hand. “He was a pirate when he was a young man. Mum was a barmaid at the Elfsong Tavern. But when they found out they were having me,” What a fucking surprise that was, according to Mum. “Mum got the job at Wildheart Manor, and Dad decided to help his gran and the bakery. And now I do too.” As much as I love being a barbarian…being an adventurer…protecting people…I don’t know. Mum and Dad are getting older. I should…I wish…No. Best not to speak of this in front of a very handsome man.

There was a kindness in his yellow eyes that she swooned over on the inside. I’m not making a fool of out of myself…not in front of him…oh gods. “You’re close with your family. That’s admirable. Wonderful, even.” Rolan chuckled nervously. “Lia and Cal annoy the hells out of me sometimes, but I don’t know what my life would like without them.” He glanced at her quickly, cheeks flushed. “Your parents must be very proud of you.”

“From the day I was born, they’ve been proud. Wanna hear something wild?” Haha get it, I’m a wild magic barbarian. Please laugh. Oh thank fuck, he laughed! “My parents are human—”

Rolan’s eyes widened. “Y-you mean, you were born to human parents or were you adopted?”

Uh oh, maybe I should keep my mouth shut. He looks even more nervous. Shit.

She released his hand and fidgeted slightly. “Yeah, born to them. Um, if this makes you uncomfortable…” Maybe he thinks I’m a freak?

He reached for her hand again. “My apologies. It’s not that I’m uncomfortable. Far from it.” THANK GOODNESS. “It’s just…erm, I’ve never heard of a tiefling born to human parents who actually…kept the baby. You’re the first.” He shook his head, then met her gaze, smiling politely. “But please continue. I want to hear where this story is headed, as it were.” Rolan, you’re such a fucking dork and I love it.

Selene grinned. “So, when I was born, the midwife tried to tell Mum and Dad I could be ‘removed’ or some shit. Do you want to know what they did?” Upon hearing him hum in assent, she continued. “Mum clutched me and said, ‘If you try to take my baby, I’ll fucking kill you.’ Dad apparently was ready to enter a rage and was looking for something blunt to knock out the midwife if necessary.”

He barked a laugh. “Goodness me, your parents do love you very much. Yes, yes…” Stop being so nervous, Rolan. Do I make him nervous? Shit. “You’re very lucky, you know.”

Yes.

Yes, I am.

And I miss them so much.

Okay, before I start crying again, I need to change the subject.

“I’m also very lucky because I have a cat.” Selene giggled. “His name is Mortimer, and he’s my baby.”

Rolan snorted. “Mortimer?”

“Mortimer. I found him when he was a kitten…”

Selene did not know how long she and Rolan sat and talked, nor did she care, only admitting the passage of time when he stifled a yawn.

“Forgive me, I think the hour is now quite late.” He said with a rueful smile. “May I walk you back to your camp, my dear? You never know what lurks in the shadows.” Rising, he offered his hand, which she took with a warm smile.

Rolan, I’m a barbarian.

She shook her head and stood. “No, I’ll be fine. Thanks for tonight. For listening. For being a friend. Thank you.”

Her bright blue demonic eyes stared into his yellow ones.

Should I?

I SHOULD!

Heart pounding in her chest, she quickly kissed his cheek, wished him a good night, and turned to return to her camp, giggling like a giddy schoolgirl.

Rolan stood frozen for several moments before he lifted a hand to where she had kissed him.

“Good gods, she’s going to be the death of me.”

[mrghostrat]

I've been trying to find fics to read and I hate that I can't find anything that hits the same as your fics (I could explain why for days, mostly because your writing is fucking amazing and also because it appeals to me specifically with the style and the fact that I fucking love footnotes), so I'll be scouring the far corners of the interwebs for more of your writing and fics that are written similarly.

thptptfhptdhkjs this kills the bilv 😭😭😭

allow me to help <3 my favourite human AU writer is @feraltuxedo, they have a huge backlog of fics in all different kinds of settings at various different lengths. they make me so happy and hopefully they'll make you happy too. not even gonna list my faves bc it's too hard to narrow it down. (feraltuxedo on ao3)

meanwhile:

Black Vitrum (2021)

(It's the first thing I wrote after a loooong time of not writing, so the prose isn't as strong as my others, but people continue to express love for the story 🥺💛)

Mads' ordinary life is turned upside down the day he reunites with an old school friend, is attacked by a demon, and learns he has a guardian angel. Now he has to make it through the already difficult journeys of university and love, with an angel on his shoulder and a demon in his head.

Paranomads (2022)

🤌 very fandom, very tropey, lots of pining and sneaking around. here's my good omens crossover concept i want to write eventually!!

The Paranomads are a trio of Aussies who’ve been best friends since primary school. When their skeptical paranormal investigation show finally lands a contract with an online streaming service, Beau, Isaac, and Adelaide fly to the United States to promote their series at various pop culture conventions across the country. Beau’s crush on Isaac has been manageable until now, but living for three months in a tiny tour bus provides some new challenges in keeping his heart in check.

Temptations Adrift (2023)

SEXY HORNY PIRATES WITH STUPIDLY FANCY PROSE 👏👏👏

Jude only wants to forget his worries when he abandons his small town to join a pirating crew. He's never yearned for romance, but loneliness drives him into the arms of his crew mates and leaves him tangled between two very different men. Confused by their intentions and conflicting truths, Jude struggles to figure out who is right for him, and what he truly wants.

[tenrose]

I gave up, the website is too shitty, literally nothing functions. Idk if the payment really failed or if those suckers are just not able to properly write 'it's sold out'

Now that I'm slightly annoyed...

I'm gonna rant.

First of all theaters can go fuck themselves if they are not able to provide proper services. The cinema I'm talking about in particular is not indie by the way, it's one of the biggest chains here (fuck you UGC) so the bare minimum they could do is provide with actual functional website so people can actually use it and make reservations. Don't even get me started on the price. 11,60€ for me to fucking go out and see people???? And we know seats aren't as good as they used to be in the past. Don't know about the snack prices, I bet it costs two kidneys.

That being said...

FUCK STREAMING PLATFORMS TOO OR EVEN ESPECIALLY

obviously I ain't paying for any. I won't pay for 10 different platforms, and especially not Amazon they can literally rot in hell. Don't even get me started on netflix. I used to pay sometimes back then. Honestly they had something. They used to do an actual effort and trying to show different stuff. They let creative direction to their writers. We wouldn't never have sense8 with today mentality tbh. Everything is just a reboot, a book adaptation emptied from its substance, a reboot, and book adaptation a reboot, a book a- you see the thing. I mean I shouldn't be bitching as pretty much never watch anything new for years so what do I know? I mean I would like to, but every time I watch a trailer, I'm tired just by watching it. Latest exemple I'm thinking about is the three body problem... Like having read the book just watching the trailer you could see the Americanism all over it... For a chinese book. And it's the problem with everything. I mean American TV shows have always be like this, maybe being younger I wasn't aware back then idk. But it feels so empty, so soulless? They can give me all the diversity they want, that doesn't change that it's still empty. And for TV shows (actually I'm talking more specifically about TV shows cause I'm not a big cinephile so I don't have the legitimacy to criticise) I know it's because of that stupid ass 8 episodes format. I've already talked about it. But it's literally draining the whole industry imo. Also writers clearly having little creative freedom since they have to make stuff that sells. But yeah, TV shows lasted physically and in memories because we were watching them slowly instead of this boulimie stuff we have now. Everything is like consume, forget, consume forget and pay shit ton of money.

And I'm thinking I am actually not built for this shit. I felt so burn out not being able to enjoy anything. So now I don't even try. I don't try new shows cause it's not worth it even when there's an actual good one. Because it's gonna be cancelled anyway. Who wants to emotionally invest in shows that get cancelled (I did so many time).

But when I do.

Be sure I will pirate the shit out of it. None of these industries deserve our money.

To finish on a positive note, if there's one thing I'm really happy for in the end. It's books. Sure the book industry is oversaturated too and there's ton of shit to criticise too (but I won't here). But it's so vast there are books everywhere for everyone, and even if tomorrow not a single book would be published (which I don't believe in), there are enough books for my entire life anyway. But yes books, even if formatted too (looking at us french snobs with our novel format), are like the only place writers can still let go of their creativity. Plus you can have cheap books (I'm starting to get there) and obviously free books thanks to libraries, and also you can pirate books too. Yes I pirate books too but tbh it doesn't even compensate how much I spend buying books so I'm not feeling guilty and I either pirate popular books or old books (if they are really old it's free anyway). But yes if you go out unlike me go buy books if you have money, to your local bookstore, or if you can't library is your way.

Reading is my anchor ⚓

[murcielagatito]

picture in picture was the only good thing to come out of streaming services and now its gone. youre telling me i coulda been watching AND talking about the silly little show from my handheld computer at the same fucking time and you took it away??? one of the few joys in life gone... at least pirating websites let me do it

[mallowmaenad]

19, 26, 34?

19:A fact about your personality

I have multiple.

26:My biggest pet peeves

Being rude to servers, wasting food, people that project their feelings onto the actions of domesticated animals and babies for fun, when an easily recognizable thing in a foreign piece of media gets localized into something stupid, "cute" animal videos where the animal is being mistreated, exotic pet owners, expensive rice, expensive soda, when tv shows' seasons are spread over multiple streaming services vs. all being on one or more, people that find kate upton attractive, people raising their voices, cars that have the bass turned up so loud you hear the chassis rattling like its going to explode more than you hear the actual music, people that tell you to "just google it", ghosting, people making arguments against nobody because they want to look enlightened, christians acting oppressed, people that hate the homestuck and hlvrai fanbase, people that make fandom their whole personalities, conspicuous consumption, people who talk about firebombing walmarts n shit who have never done anything in their lives to help their communities, when I send something to someone for them to read and they never get around to reading it because they don't have the patience to, overconfident men, when someone eggs me on and on to play a video game so we can play together and then when I start playing it they suddenly don't have any time to play it with me anymore, when settings have lore than make whole swaths of species ontologically evil, people who are picky about grammar and spelling, people who say skyrim is the worst elder scrolls game, having to play tabletop RPGs by "official play" guidelines, delivery fees that don't even go to the delivery driver, people who talk about cool weapons "not being practical", hats with poor craftsmanship, the feel of wearing converse shoes, youtube accent, cis white dudes being at the forefront of progressiveness in pop culture, people assuming you understand whatever references they make to a thing adjacent to something you do know about but personally don't care about, farting in my direction, uncreative misappropriation of the word "golem", wanting to fuck league of legends characters, people that think cat girls are more popular than puppy girls in real life, deodorant, people that get pissy about buying pre-minced garlic, when arizona ice tea is more expensive than 1 dollar a can, mr. beast's face, the term "thicc" and its consequences, people who like fat asses and thick thighs who hate it when girls are fat, when people conflate the dnd class list as having actual ramifications in wider fantasy media, people who think weed is bad, asking for criticism and only receiving complaints, people that say chinese-american or texmex cuisine isnt "authentic", formalities, out of character lewd fanart especially if it's of a strong, dominant woman in a submissive position with toned down muscles, when RPGs butch bait me,

blonde girls with no personality, NHentai's tag search system, mid shounen dominating the western anime scene, when someone says something is "so gay" but its just their fandom headcanons, when one take from a post or article gets so popular when you bring up the thing it's related to people can't not bring it up every time the topic appears, people that try to get the attention of zoo animals, people that own over 700 dollars worth of firearms that aren't collectors like actual collectors not fuckin Clint from the suburbs that feels like a man only cause he owns an AR-15 and a Desert Eagle , lack of cool and edgy plus size character designs, when people call transphobic caricatures "GNC AF", gum immediately losing its flavor, the olive oil industry, when people tell me "just emulate it" or "just pirate it" and roll their eyes when I tell them I'm worried about viruses, games that rip off grand theft auto, when charity bundles on itch.io are 80% unfinished PWYW proof of concept demos put there to get good will advertising, people who are concerned with Wario's honor, lack of plus size yuri, people who turn their noses up to foreign foods, RPGs with character customization that won't let you play as a girl, doing my taxes, when people are coy about details, dudes that want to fuck alstolfo, slowed with reverb remixes, the memeification of phonk, the price of video games, waiting on game downloads after putting the disc into the console, people doing me favors and getting passive-aggressive about it later when I didn't ask for it/tried to ease the burden of it as much as possible, when people ask me what I want on my burger when the menu clearly outlines what toppings the burger is meant to come with, trying to find a tf2 classic server without additional weapon mods that break the game, polo shirts

34:What I find attractive in women

Interesting personality, eager to praise, understanding, warm, enjoys eating, weird, decent fashion sense, messy bedroom/car, doesn't wear any strong artificial scents, progressive stances on neurodivergence and psychology, physically affectionate, has incorporated something like a kind of animal or fantastical concept into their identity, caring, vaguely maternal at times, willing to play video games and watch youtube poops, sense of humor, soft, will do drugs with me in a level-headed manner, likes goofy looking cocktails and desserts, not above eating a 5 dollar hamburger on a date, into fat girls, has a broad definition of what sex is, ideally transgender, nice lap to lay head in, endurance to have 300lbs on top of them for some period of time, willing to buy things for me, kinky in a cringe way, a bit ugly (by society's standards), older than me, into obscure animes and music, appreciates a good cup of coffee, lax style, cringe resistant, quiet, into plushies, total nerd, in terms of appearance I like a very diverse range of those to the point where it doesn't factor in as much but I find conventionally attractive people boring and visible ribs make me feel concerned and uncomfortable

[shmreduplication]

I’m glad the HBO Cartoon Network thing spurred my friends into buying physical media (I bought a dvd player!) but uh

what about original content from streaming platforms?  

Palm Springs is such a good movie that it kicked off the timeloop project but.......it’s a Hulu original.  a quick search of the internet tells me a dvd and bluray was released in Spain, I guess a bluray player is cheaper than paying for hulu for the rest of my life but it has to be “region unlocked”, whatever that means

and again as we saw with the HBO Cartoon Network thing, streaming services don’t always keep up stuff they have the rights for.  Marvel’s Defenders shows were Netflix originals, they made like ten seasons of stuff between all four heros and the crossover season, and now they are gone from netflix.  Presumably they’ve moved to Disney+ altho I haven’t asked anyone who has a legal subscription to it.  Daredevil got DVD sets for the first two seasons but none for S3 

like.........I guess hypothetically someone, not me of course, could figure out how to burn dvds from the websites that people hypothetically use to stream pirated shows+movies.  But what about when dvd players stop being made?  What about when my dvd player breaks after I can’t buy a new one?  Is it just a Sisyphean task to constantly port my collection to the newest technology?  OK I guess that’s doable, my brother has been digitizing cassettes for his music hobby for a few years now.......But what about the dvd special features?  Is there going to be a day when I watch my last director’s commentary?  

idk dude I spent so much of my childhood fantasizing about being able to afford the stuff I wanted and I did it but it turns out a lot of it no longer fucking exists :( 

I feel like there’s a stereotype of old people who re-experience the media of their youths and don’t partake in any new media, but now we live in this funhouse mirror world where it feels like the vast majority of media is media from my youth due to the extended universes of star wars+superheros+lotr+game of thrones, but it’s against my will, and on the other hand of it I’ll only be able to enjoy physical media from my youth because physical media of new stuff is not going to be continued to be made.  The legal options are going to be subscribe and stream new episodes of old media or buy dvds of old media but like probably secondhand 

[forcryingoutbat]

thinking about when someone told me they pay for 5 different streaming services and have never pirated a film in their life. what the fuck my dude

[eddwardtheseventhspacewizard]

I ranted a shit ton so summery: Updates are supposed to be free, fuck corps, yo ho ho, use that cash to support smaller groups and individual artists and the people actually working on the games you enjoy, and basic needs should be free btw.

I put my rant under the cut so I don’t accidentally eat someone’s dash

I got really into Cult of The Lamb last month and an update recently came out. Before it came out I kept seeing people asking “how much will it cost”Like bestie, it’s an UPDATE. Updates are supposed to be free. If it’s not it’s dlc. I saw articles talking about how “crazy” it is that they’re giving us a “free update” like updates are supposed to be free! What world are you all from!!?? What games, what companies have done this to you!?!? Who tricked you into thinking dlcs and updates are the same?!?! Who is making you pay for everything??!! I was talking to my mom the other day and she plays the sims 4. She hasn’t been able to play for a year so now there’s a ton of packs and stuff. She was agonizing over what she wanted because “I already see over a hundred dollars of stuff I want!”. I have all the sims 4 content. You know why? I don’t respect EA. The internet is a marvelous thing with some smart people. People who also don’t respect EA. I’m not necessarily saying we should all become pirates but when companies get stupid and expect people to pay for stuff that should be pretty basic like seasons in a fucking life simulator I stop caring. I haven’t bought shit for the sims but I have payed for all the cosmetic packs in Cult of The Lamb. It’s almost like when you do good with your thing and don’t make basic shit and set it for 30 bucks people actually respect you. I’ve seen lots of other people say they’ve also bought all the packs for Cult of Them Lamb even if they don’t use them. Why? They like the game and the creators and want to support them. Hey, while I’m talking about piracy I’m gonna mention the bullshitery that is streaming services. I’m not fucking paying for three subscriptions to watch My Little Pony but you know what I will do? Find it online. Maybe if the whole show was in one spot I wouldn’t have turned to pirates. Maybe if companies didn’t try to get every penny from me I’d give them a few dollars. Maybe I respect smaller groups and individuals more than companies because I’ve personally seen them have a better track record with morality. Maybe it’s just that companies aren’t people and I don’t humanize them but I will do so with small teams. Idk, capitalism sucks the joy out of live and everyone deserves food, shelter, water, clothes, healthcare, and to fucking live. I wouldn’t be so mad about dumb ass prices on fun things if the things people literally need to live weren’t so damn expensive. Call me crazy but I don’t think things people will die without should have a price on them.

it really is unbelievable that gamers aren't the most anticapitalist demographic ever. like imagine if mobile game devs had their needs met and could make actual videogames instead of brainless filler between ads for other games that are also brainless filler between ads. imagine if games didn't need to be shoved out the door a year before they're ready filled with microtransactions because shareholders wanna see a line go up. imagine if studios were owned and run by the people making the games and not business bros who have never touched a videogame. how is this not an automatically won battle

[irrolyphant]

FX is owned by Disney as well, so it's not even like they're having to make deals with some other company. I really don't like "all at once" drops either, add to that how often it's combined with near zero advertising it's like streaming services want these tv shows to die (let's not get into the new "we're deleting this thing less than a year after releasing it" trend either). Ugh :( At least with the promo they're doing for City Primeval it seems like they actually want the show to succeed

I agree with everything.

Streaming services were great when they first started, but now they’re getting so greedy and lazy. With the Internet being such a huge part of daily life now, we’re all worldwide, interacting with people and media from practically everywhere on the planet, so the fact that these services withhold their content from certain countries/regions/continents ‘just because’ is such a strange thing?? They don’t want people to pirate their media, but they make it difficult-to-impossible for people to watch things legitimately. How are things supposed to be popular if they don’t let people watch them??? This is supposed to be a business, how do they expect to make money from shows only a small percentage of people can see????

Oh god, the promotion for some things! It took AGES for the Daisy Jones promo to finally start. And then there’s Full Circle. That show starts next week, and there’s still so little promo for it? A teaser trailer and one full trailer?? What the fuck. (And let’s not get me started on the worldwide distribution of that show! Sheesh!)

But yeah, I’m thrilled with how City Primeval’s being promoted! So many trailers and photos, and their social medias are frequently dropping content, and interacting with fans. 🫶🏻

[undead-potatoes]

The new Suicide Squad movie has more personality and character in its first 5 minutes than the entire first movie combined, and it’s actually an okay movie with a coherent plot

Isn’t it amazing what you can accomplish when you have a halfway competent director and producers

[matchbet-allofthetime]

Not fucking shocking.

Between all of the above points and the rapid loss of physical media in favour of everything digital (which is both environmentally helpful and helpful for moving/keeping all your shit together, I GET it), and the insistence that "buying ≠ owning", it's just fucking easier to pirate.

As a kid I saw this starting when more streaming services started. And I am not shocked at all.

Fuck the companies- a pirate's life for me, bitch!

yarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr you greedy fucks

[kissingdeadgirls]

this weekend i watched iwtv, the terror (first half very beautiful and comprehendable, second half i have some questions), the bear (everything tumblr said it was), and the expanse (almost done the second season)

some thots on the expanse so far

i wasn’t sure i liked most of the first season, but was stuck in bed, so i powered through it. and i miss shitty cable sci-fi. it’s the first space show i’ve seen since sgu, lmao.

the first season very much Feels Like A Book. that way books are so particular about all the threads connecting, where television (esp kinda b sci-fi shows) are more lax. this is especially charming.

the expanse has a very small amount of fanfic? i am avoiding spoilers, i just wanted to see!, but it’s f/f is the biggest category? and the top ship is the hot milf? god is good? i love chrisjen. holy shit.

i also do not know anyones name and spoiled myself trying to look some up. you should not pay for streaming services ever, and esp not pr*me who gives you a fucking ad in between each eps, but on the other hand if you want to know characters names without looking them up on the database where you will learn the number of eps they’re in, or a wiki which will spoil everything in a single sentence, the nightmare x-ray gimmick is actually pretty useful. sorry.

i just wanted to know drummer’s name so i could more adequately imagine her and naomi getting married in the mormon chapel (slow burn, 200k, au) (racket ball after game, 5k, explicit) (anarchist book club coffee shop au, 20k, archive locked).

took a lil break because i am currently frustrated with naomi’s characterization, where it doesn’t feel like she’s being given the room to be the moral centrepiece but actually just a wet blanket. like. this truncated version of her is making me want to scream. she’s not that!!!! and it’s so close to being a good continuation of her arc but fails to be and it’s driving me to violence.

trying to imagine changes that would have taken up the same amount of screen time but would have been more effective:

having the crew bust in to the aid ship in 2x09 the weeping somnambulist, being like: i am holden, saver of worlds, instead of mars cosplay. using this to really lead in to naomi’s distaste for Causes and jim’s newfound expediency through violence. having the pirates only go for the 10% (20% if you want to give a bone to jim, which i don’t) and not be especially murderous, (which also reaffirms the mundanity of this kind of violence, it’s structural) and then still having jim choose to be the hero to deleterious effect. those scenes dragged for a thousand years and blew chunks, and they seriously undercut naomi’s character and politics (and the politics of the show).

like. wrt the vulture preying on families looking to get reunited with stolen security access. is that the best example of violence as expediency and holden’s impaired judgement coming to align with amos (my belovéd)? i would personally break his legs for free. which again leaves…. wet blanket :(

idk i just think that would be a more useful base to cut from. idk!!! just really truncated her!!! the 10 second scene of her and pax mentioning her lost son in the hallway. like. the narrative about state experimentation on children doesn’t care about these kids at all huh.

a final note: having miller and julie die naked while being consumed by the alien life force, embracing a nuclear bomb is so comically close to being My Shit™ but i do not condone heterosexuality like that. also having an ingenue and not having her be gay about it is simply bad writing. and finally having her naked in her final scene (which is also the only one where we see her in real time) be naked (literal male gaze) is just so fucking boring. if they weren’t going to put her in the razorback gear (and then transforming to her dead self as they embraced etc) they should have just used the consumed state. i also hated that her solar plexus was exposed. we deserve so much better than that.