#fuck all'y'all

[rrrick]

🤣

[jodjuya]

Part six of my Chrono Trigger liveblog!

Fought my way through the Ocean Palace. Going to attempt to take out Lavos on my first try, using Crono, Marle, and Robo.

They have the Lifeline triple-tech, and here're their setups:

Fingers crossed I can make it!

Oh cool, the mcguffin knife transformed into Masamune!

Okay, The Boss Fight. Let's go!

Marle went down in the first volley, Crono and Robo are still up!

Crono raises Marle, Robo heal-beams the party!

Lavos takes out Marle again, Crono and Robo use Shield spheres to try to stay alive!

Lavos wipes the party!

Grrr!

Okay, reset and trying a new strategy. Golden Earring on Crono, and Green Dream on Marle. Let's go!

Wiped again. Grrrr. Giving it a third attempt and then I'll just accept the loss.

Yeah, third time down. Just not strong enough to win a fight that I'm supposed to lose.

Magus was the prophet, and he had sworn revenge against Lavos?? I guess we haven't seen that Inciting Incident yet, because I have no idea what he's talking about. Stupid time-travel... 😒

Man, this Queen really had her psyche scrambled by Lavos. Stupid Planetary Parasite... 😒

"why not do as Schala says, and run away, tail betwixt your legs?" Uh, cause your monster is about to destroy the planet and there's nowhere to run to?

Woah, Jesus fuck, my soul escaped before my very eyes and then my body disintegrated. That's certainly a way to die... 😬

"please don't hate my mother, or our kingdom" bro she literally destroyed the entire planet... 😒

So is Magus a reincarnated time-travelling Crono, or...? 🤔

Well, at least Crono wasn't wearing the Golden Stud when he got disintegrated and I only lost the Golden Earring. Small consolation... :(

All-female party!

Something something sun stone, moon stone, sun temple. People keep talking of these things. What's the deal?? 🤔 Are sun stones the Red Stones we've been using for Masamune purposes??

These earthbound people are being surprisingly kind to the Zeal survivors. It's nice to see.

Urrrrrrrrrrgh, Dalton you piece of shit. I should have killed you every other time I had the chance. If only you didn't keep running away like a little bitch!

I seriously seriously want to kill this guy. Biggest asshole on the planet.

Gunna Girl Power my way through the destruction of this entire airship. Fuck all'y'all this bird is going down!

Oh, I thought all those switches I could see through the air vents were labelled "1", but no, they're arrows showing which way the conveyor belts are going.

What?? Why can't Marle and Lucca use their magic??? Bogus!!

Dalton is going to use our fucking time machine for his "air throne"? This guy is the stupidest motherfucker on the planet. I'm gunna regicide his ass!!

Ayla's equipment recovered, Marle's equipment recovered. All I'm missing is Lucca's and then I can properly wreck havoc... 😈

Party equipment recovered, so I can equip Lucca from the spares, but still haven't found her gear yet...

Okay! All gear and money found! Let's crash this plane!

Oh, Janus is Magus!

Oh whoops, he was summoning Lavos to kill him, and we were those meddling kids who busted up his plans, whoops

Sigh, no, we won't fight you. There's been enough death.

Oh cool, he is a Crono replacement after all, and we can replace the real Crono by talking to the guru of time! New quest!

Haha! He flies instead of running! So extra!

Exploring the Lost Sanctum. World's last reptite isn't exactly an observant fellow, it seems 😅

Bro, who are you calling an ape? You're talking to a robot, a frog man, and some kind of dark elf... 😅

Aforementioned dark elf putting his dark elf racism to good use:

Aww, poor widdle reptites oppressed by monsters, boo hoo. Now it's our turn to oppress you little shits! Bow before your new amphibious robotic fae overlords! Cower and tremble! Grovel!

Ooh, quests with rewards? Why didn't you say so!

Fetch: golden hammer!

But first, Fetch: golden sand!

Then: sprinkle on sapling to get golden wood for golden hammer!

Fetch: secret thing in dark cave, through narrow passage to the west! Bro, what narrow passage???

Found: golden sand!

Found: dark cave!

Applied: golden sand to sapling!

Timeskip: using time machine!

Let's go exploring in 600ad now that we have a plane to get around in.

To do list:

Find stolen carpentry tools

Pour one out for Toma when he dies

(Finally find that rainbow shell Toma is supposed to be looking for?)

Monster in cave? With treasure?

Find golden tree

(Get tree shaped into hammer by carpenter?? & If the tools are rusty now, get that one reptite to restore them??)

Woah hey wtf why does the carpenter have 4 identical apprentice clones??

Nothing to see in North Ruins...

Oh, Ozzie is still here. Let's kick his ass!

LMFAO at the battle music slowing to an abrupt halt when Ozzie's goons immediately fell down a pit.

Killed by a kitten lmao 🤣

Okay, back to looking for that golden hammer...

Ooh, MORE quests with rewards?! Heck yeah

Kill: monsters!

Fetch: lumicite!

The golden tree was cut down, probably by Ogans?! 😡

Guy: wants to build a bridge!

Other Guy: wants to build a ladder!

I wonder if I can wear Ozzie's Pants and counteract the negative effect with Schala's Amulet? 🤔

I cannot 🙁

Obtained: golden hammer!

Defeated: monsters in the woods!

Obtained: steel ingot! (idk why tho 🤷🏻‍♂️)

Delivered: golden hammer!

Fetch: prismastone!

Obtained AND Delivered: prismastone!

You know, I bet the ONLY reason Magus flies everywhere instead of walking is to make his cape and hair billow majestically in the breeze, the dramatic bitch 🤣

Fetch: second prismastone!

Fuse: two prismastones into some kind of super-gem!

Imma go grind in the hunting grounds for a bit to get enough stuff to trade for the fancy new ruby armour...

I wonder what was up with that alternate future I got a brief glimpse at, wherein Marle married Deadbeat Depression Crono...? 🤔🤔🤔

Ruby armours: get!

Wellness Check: lonely guy!

Wellness Check guy has been training for 65 million years to challenge us to a rematch?! Jesus, are Nu immortal????

Fetch: ladder!

Wasn't there a guy who wanted to build a ladder? 🤔

Fetch: vines, sturdy!

Fetch: sturdy lumber!

Fetch: strong metal!

Fetch: durable hammer!

Hey buddy, I got your vines right here, are you gunna make me a ladder or not??

Do I gotta diy?

Oh, diy with time-travel!

Obtained: sturdy wood!

Borrowed: golden hammer!

Hung: sturdy vines! (But guys, seriously, 65 MILLION YEARS! how the fuck are they gunna last that long?? A far better plan would have simply been for Robo to just yeet Ayla up the cliff face...)

It would be funny as fuck if I returned to find the new ladder collapsed and the old one still intact.

Delivered: building supplies!

Oh man, the Haste Helm is dope!

I wonder if the new bridge will be part of the Wellness Check or if it'll be got something else...

Wellness: checked!

Nu learned ✨ The Power Of Friendship! ✨

Locate: missing bridge builder!

Fetch: helper!

Fetch: lunch for helper!

Jesus fucking christ these quests have an insulting amount of backtracking! Sheer contempt for the players. The payoff for going through all this bullshit better be worth it!

Fetch: prehistoric banana!

Fetch: Repmark!

Fuse: two shiny stones!

Recharge: saintstone!

Cool, I finally have a lantern and can explore that dark cave

Vanquished: evil monsters!

Robo is fully a dragon now, which is very exciting. He's equipped with the Dragon Arm, Dragonhead, Dragon Armor, and Dragon's Tear.

🐲🤖

Investigate: creepy tower!

Probably should have revived Crono before doing all this side-questing. I hope he's not massively underlevelled when I get him back... 😬

Vanquished: Some Guy Who Was Just Minding His Own Business But His Castle Made The Reptites Feel Creeped Out So We Killed Him

Scored me some: Lumicite!

Wandering around and keep discovering new side-quests to go on, and forcing myself to ignore them until I get Crono back so he doesn't end up absurdly underlevelled...

Fuck Death Mountain. All my homies hate Death Mountain. Especially the second windy section. Fuck that section with the force of ten thousand suns!

Oh sweet!!!! Crono has been keeping up with the party throughout his demise. He's the same level as everyone else!

Side quest time!

Fought a flaming eyeball, obtained Moon Stone.

Put it in the shrine. Oh no somebody stole it!

Found Tomo's grave and poured one out for him. His ghost seemed pretty happy about that.

Bloke in the pub says we can borrow his carpentry tools from his wife. I'll go do that even though I can no longer remember who wanted them... 🤔

Scrolled back through my own liveblog, and there's some guy in 600ad whose tools were stolen? I guess I'll just give him the drunk's tools to replace them.

Ghosts in the north ruins??

It's the ghost of Cyrus! But I can't hurt him in any way. :/

Maybe I'll put Frog at the head of the party? Cyrus tried to talk to him when we stopped fighting... 🤔

Nope, that didn't help. Guess I'll time-travel about it...

Went back in time, gave carpentry tools to the guy, he says he'll fix up the northern ruins. Neat!

Moon Stone still here, so I guess it was stolen in 1000ad then after all... 🤔

Bloke says he can't finish fixing the joint until we clear out all the monsters. Righto, chief, I'll let you know when it's done!

Bumbling around & found out who nicked my Moon Stone before it hatched. Got it back and returned it to the incubator.

Sun Stone get!

Cleared out monsters and restored ruins to shrine. Touching reunion and then Frog unlocked ✨ The Power Of Self-Respect! ✨

Unable to get the carpentry tools back. I guess that drunk will just have to buy himself some new tools lol

Investigating cave where a Tomo's ghost said the shell was

It's a royal heirloom now? So Marle can go back to The Present and claim it??

THIS FUCKING CHANCELLOR!!!!!

"Nadia, help! I hired a leopard that eats faces as my Chancellor and now it's eating MY face!!!1! 😭😭😭"

"bring the rainbow shell before the court! Not that I expect you'll succeed, nyeh-heh-heh..." It is literally too heavy to lift, you son of a bitch

Lmao, Ayla is freaking PUMPED that Marle is old enough to leave home and have sex 🤣

"The line of Guardia has ended. This kingdom shall be mine!" Bro, the king is standing right there and it is still his prerogative as king to order you cut down where you stand. Maybe wait until AFTER he's been completely deposed before you start your cackling... 🙄

Marle:

"even the king is subject to our laws." And you are subject to my foot up your ass! Stfu!

Fucking Yakra again!!!!!

13 generations of him in 400 years. At least the monsters know how to fuck...

You dense motherfucker how could you not understand what those words meant?????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Was the Chancellor slipping Stupid Pills info your breakfast each morning or what???

This post is long enough now.

[handypolymath]

I have five languages running and I'm getting top slot in diamond league this week I've been training all pandemic and then some for this fuck all'y'all eat my dust.

[prismadog]

this is a PSA from a tired guy [me] who just wants some peace and quiet in his neighborhood.

look, I like fireworks as much as the next guy [I actually don't, but that's beside the point] but for the love of fucking GOD or whatever, would ya'll please not set the things off above the houses?

I don't care where all'y'all live in the world, that don't matter. just listen.

y'all wanna set fireworks off, knock yourself out.

but please.

fucking. PLEASE!

consider your neighbors. DO NOT set the fireworks off above anyone's house.

if you're gonna set them off, please do it in a nice OPEN area where there's less potential damage or pissed off people.

that's all I ask. PSA over because if I don't leave now, I'm gonna do a backflip off the handle and start ranting.

[corevirtua]

2020 so far...

Safe inside from COVID woes I'm warm and safe from head to toes how this will end no one knows being on lock-down really blows

The virus spreads, yet people go out can't even hear you, even if you shout the world is full of itself with clout because that's what this is really about

The rich will get healthcare, the poor will go hungry meanwhile, you're going to go vote for some dummy you think that you and your candidate agree but it's only you that's blind as can be

"But, muh voting privileges," they say "They may take my gun away!" "I actually like that Donald J!" "Why do I get no fucking pay?"

"Vaccines, are bad! Take the natural path!" "Don't need healthcare, just took a GOOOP bath!" "A tax break for each billionaire psychopath!" "COVID's a hoax! No aftermath!"

"Essential oils will save the day!" "Can't you just... pray away your 'gay'?" "I bought all the toilet paper today!" 'Idiocracy,' served on a tray.

So as I sit here and watch the rain, and watch the world wreck like a train, so many people in suffering an pain, I write this poem to explain...

It's YOU, you stupid fucking ingrate You think the way you are is great Rolling coal and overweight "Don't you think Uh'murica's great?"

And then there's Karen, worst of the bunch yelling at the hostess to get her free lunch later she wonders 'bout the economy crunch contributing NOTHING, 'cept her panty bunch

Rednecks are dumb, racist as hell their intelligence likely thrown down a well love filling their diesel, down at the Shell HOW dumb are they? No one can tell!

And then there's the gamer teen: "Man, he knows it all!" thinks the Joker is cool, and that Hatsune is tall Comes into a pillow, or an anime doll But will insist that he knows more, than all'y'all

Egdgelord edglord, please leave Earth No one is impressed by your stench or your girth, Your neckbeard has no manly worth And everyone regrets the day of your birth

Wall Street is a psychopaths place Leopards wondering "What happened to my face?" the religious demanding "When will WE see grace?" It's all just a big fucking disgrace

So I'm biding time here inside my home online, watching the virus roam writing you this stupid poem "HELL YEAH! That'll fuckin' show'em!!!"

I sit back as the world does world rend The recoil's a bitch, because karma DOES bend Just here to remind you, my friend Everybody, gets 'theirs' in the end

[digital-magus]

Saw an ad for Depends using a head nurse as someone who needs dependability etc etc. And, no offense to those that use them, all'y'all valid, but all I can think watching it was "We're overworking our medical institutions so much the staff don't even have the time to take a shit. It's a national tragedy and we at Depends are gonna capitalize the fuck out of it."

[junkyard-trash-blog]

Merlin: Wanna say something? Go ahead, I fucking dare you

Elyan: that's right, boys, I've stolen this magic boi from all'y'alls. Merlin's mine now

because thats not even a bit gay

[fandeadgloves]

Will the ghost of Carrie Fisher appear in a Prozac explosion wearing a pink pussy hat and riding a giant French Bulldog to accept a lifetime achievement award?

People who answered with ‘Other:’

katythereader: In our dreams! disastermychild: Yes, and there will be GLITTER avacynner: i fucking hope so chasingriver: Is this even in doubt? They've already booked an extra half hour into the ceremony for it. a-forger-and-a-point-man: if this doesn't happen i'm switching off the tv earlgreytea68: Yes, but also Tweeting the whole time dremiel: Yes, during a commercial break.

What will be the most memorable quote from her posthumous speech?

deadgloves: Darth Vader was a better dresser, a better orator, and a better puppet for his dark lord and master. I'm glad I'm dead because there isn't enough Prozac in the world to deal with this shit. brookebond: Why do they make some bras so tight? A woman needs to breathe, you know. disastermychild: Drown fascists in glitter! entrecomillas: I wish I was as witty and brave as Carrie, alas I'm not so I can't begin to imagine what she'd say corinnetags: Let's take the orange coke fiend dictator down! avacynner: The whole thing. God fucking bless her thingsbeginningwitha: Fuck off. bookshop: You guys, don't worry. The cocktails in heaven are phenomenal. chasingriver: "In the afterlife, everything is revealed, and it turns out Donald's penis is even tinier than his hands." amysnotdeadyet: Fuck Lord Dampnut, the Force WINS! a-forger-and-a-point-man: "i'll be back"  --  no wait that's not the right movie... konoyo: And fuck all'y'all earlgreytea68: When women put all three of their feelings together, it's a sounds you can hear around the world. guiltypuknowme: "LITERALLY GO FUCK EVERYTHING UP" teacuphuman09: Fuck yourself, President Cheese Sauce flosculatory: Help me obi Juan whoever the fuck you are....You're my only ho (said to show her support for the Mexican community)

Links

Main Results

Bonus Round Summary

Incepting Lord Dampnut

Carrie Fisher Posthumous Speech

[traiil-blog]

( so, i’m heading to bed now because it’s legit 5 am and i can see sound, but feel free to send me some memes or questions for newt. i’ll enjoy answering them tomorrow and, if you do send one and want to turn it into a thread, we can perfectly do so! i hope everyone’s having a great day, night or afternoon. if it’s your birthday, happy birthday. and keep being awesome, you beautiful people, you. )

[handypolymath]

I posted 5,408 times in 2021

94 posts created (2%)

5314 posts reblogged (98%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 56.5 posts.

I added 237 tags in 2021

#tasty meta - 55 posts

#black widow - 31 posts

#natasha romanoff - 26 posts

#farscape - 19 posts

#behold nature you fuck - 18 posts

#bruce banner - 18 posts

#verdad - 18 posts

#black widow movie - 18 posts

#sweet burns - 17 posts

#solidarity - 17 posts

Longest Tag: 103 characters

#just as i assumed that lizzy's aunt and uncle are quite aware of the true characters of fitz and george

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Black women launch directory connecting POC with therapists of color | Afro

16 notes • Posted 2021-01-10 14:43:35 GMT

#4

homesick

feral

eleven

gloaming

kitchen

six

metastatic

diaspora

zero

airplane.

16 notes • Posted 2021-07-13 02:27:44 GMT

#3

Every time I read these, I'm struck by how well the author lays out exactly how fucking rational these choices ARE when you're stuck, and how much poverty requires you that sell out your own future health and best interests for the chance to survive week to week. And that's trauma. And it takes time and effort and pain to put those survival skills into perspective, even when you're lucky enough to catch a break and climb out for bit.

17 notes • Posted 2021-05-17 18:29:43 GMT

#2

I have five languages running and I'm getting top slot in diamond league this week I've been training all pandemic and then some for this fuck all'y'all eat my dust.

17 notes • Posted 2021-06-29 14:45:33 GMT

#1

Alexei’s career comeback was over the moment he picked up the stuffy instead of the gun.

31 notes • Posted 2021-07-27 19:57:33 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[burdenedwithgloriouskawaiii]

So I thought I was done with this. I'd gone through elementary school, Middle school, High school, college, I've fucking graduated, I'm done with school shit!

So please tell me why I'm still dealing with a presentation on something I don't care about with group members who won't do their share?

[sisterwho-refuses-togetatumbl-r]

NO it is fuck all'y'alls you Kentucky fried poser.

KFC

Kentucky Fucky Chucky