#from the top they kinda look like pop tarts .

[masatos-wig]

YAUUUP guess who tried to make mille feuilles emphasis on tried

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

🧁 cupcake analysis 🧁

YES, YOU READ THAT CORRECTLY 🤡 I’m still fixated on the cute character-themed cupcakes we got from the recent TsumTsums x TWST collab… so I’m going to talk about more things I noticed in the cupcake designs by dorm + by individual characters!

Mmm, cupcakes… 🧁 I would make these if only I had the tools to make all of the painstaking little details—

Heartslabyul

They all have checkered cupcake liners with a half-painted white rose. Famous Heartslabyul iconography!

Their names are written out in a white cursive font. Not the wackiest they could have gone with, but it fits the whimsical style of these cupcakes.

Riddle

Of course, we have strawberries—a fruit from Riddle’s favorite dessert, his beloved strawberry tarts (which also have personal significance to him, being as it was a strawberry tart’s taste that entranced him and made him late to return home as a child). The ring of frosting piped around the strawberries kind of creates the illusion of a tart’s puff pastry with the fruit nesting inside.

Red frosting made with a piping tip to resemble a big rose! Again, more famous Heartslabyul iconography.

IT HAS RIDDLE’S HEART AHOGE 😭

The cupcake also has the crown and a ribbon similar to the ones he wears in his Dorm Uniform~

Unlike the other Heartslabyul cupcakes, Riddle’s is predominantly one color: red. This could be referring to how Riddle is the most rigid in the dorm and someone who demands uniformity and preaches absolutism (“follow the rules”, “paint all the roses red”, etc.).

Even so! There are still little gold and blue sprinkles (though still in a neat arrangement)! I like to think of them as sprinkles of hope and a willingness to change… the first step he’s taking outside of his comfort zone!

No card; this makes sense since Riddle is also the only one without a card suit mark on his face.

Trey

The cookie iced to look like his hat…

Another cookie iced to look like the three of clubs heart (for obvious reasons)!

Trey’s cupcake looks kinda fuzzy like moss, so that leads me to believe the frosting got dipped in sanding sugar to give it texture or something. This makes the cupcake look like it’s an unassuming shrub—and really, isn’t that what Trey claims to be? He’s not an exciting red rose like Riddle, he’s the mild-mannered “normal” guy there to support the flower as the leaves and shoots.

Sugared violets as a topping! Nice way of incorporating Trey’s favorite food into this.

He has a little dusting of sprinkles too; maybe because it was him that showed Riddle “a whole new world”.

There seems to be a layer of jagged chunks (maybe crushed pistachios) along the rim. Feels quite different than the rest of the cake—maybe it’s to represent the less kind side of himself that Trey sometimes alludes to.

Two cookie sticks, which remind me of like two spears crossing to block off a path to the queen. On-brand for Trey, who initially follows Riddle’s orders to a T and kicks out his rule-breaking underclassmen.

Cater

There’s a LOT going on here, and I wonder if that’s in part because Cater is a Magicam fiend and in part because he’s using his flashiness to distract from looking deeper into him. This cupcake reflects that idea well, especially with the colorful sprinkles in the center (as opposed to spread out like Trey or Riddle’s) to make the otherwise mainly orange and red cake pop out more on a social media feed. It also could mean that Cater really keeps to himself, as the sprinkles are not spread outward.

If you look closely, the frosting vaguely resembles Cater’s hair. There’s a larger dollop in the middle which sort of looks like the middle section of his hair that’s pulled back.

There’s lots of little decorations that resembles the decorations on Cater’s phone case—an item near and dear to his heart.

The orange slices can be sweet—the impression that Cater tries to give off—but the pretzel implies a savory taste—what he actually prefers to eat.

There’s a squiggle of darker orange under his name. Is it to call attention to his identity? Cater tries to seek validation and attention from socials, so maybe this is a call to action.

Cater’s cupcake is the only one in his entire dorm that has TWO cards (both four of diamonds). One is probably a cookie and is in full color whole the other is one solid color (brown) and made of chocolate. Most likely this is referring to his UM, which allows Cater to create clones of himself. I wonder if the second card being chocolate alludes to something else too… Namely, the more melancholy and downtrodden part of himself that Cater usually does not let his peers know about 😔

Also two cookie sticks! Similar meaning as Trey’s, especially given that Cater was the first upperclassman to toss Adeuce out (after he gets them to paint the roses for him).

Ace

Ace of hearts card!

A sprinkle of hearts… Are any of us surprised??

His frosting is very ruffled and playful, much like his personality.

The cupcake is more on the simple side compared to many of the others; this is also very “Ace” of him, as Ace is commonly described as “the average high school boy” and has indicated himself that he has no particular goals or ambitions yet.

There’s a cherry on top! Very bright and cheeky, just like Ace—oh, and let’s not forget, cherry pie is his favorite food!

There’s also what appears to be almond shavings on Ace’s cupcake; almonds are actually very closely related to cherries so it’s a great pairing! If we really wanna stretch it, maybe it’s a reference to how Ace is skilled at mimicking or copying others, as the taste/smell of almond and cherries can be commonly mistaken for one another.

Deuce

Two of spades card!

Deuce’s cupcake has a very different texture to it. Unlike the others, his is very smoothed out and almost shiny (like a mirror glazed cake!). It makes me think this is to help him stand out as someone who is trying to reform and reinvent himself into something sparkling—especially seeing as the blue part of the cake seems to be covering up/glooping over the body of the cupcake itself.

Little candy eggs (one with a crack in it) and a baby chick! A callback to him liking egg dishes and the utter despair he experienced when he first learned that supermarket eggs aren’t fertilized…

The light blue squiggle makes me think of Deuce meandering and not knowing where he wants to go in life, representative of his delinquent phase or perhaps struggling to stay on the straight and narrow path of an honors student.

Finally, we have the grey marks on the cupcake which look like tire marks left from skidding around on a magical wheel/blastcycle, Deuce’s preferred mode of transportation!

Deuce's cupcake goes from blonde/yellowish to blue, which probably refers to him going from bleached hair as a delinquent to his natural hair color as he tries to reform himself.

Savanaclaw

Golden yellow cupcake liners with Savanaclaw’s signature horizontal zigzag pattern.

Their names seem to be done in a blocky text on chocolate. Fits the tough, somewhat rigid hierarchical feel of the dorm.

Leona

A crescent moon-shaped candy invokes the imagery of Scar singing the final line to Be Prepared as he and the hyenas ready themselves for the coup.

The darker frosting swirled on the side be interpreted as his scar or maybe the end of his tail.

Cacao nibs kind of remind me of rocks, perhaps to symbolize the hard childhood Leona had, desperately trying to prove himself to people who didn’t like him in the first place. There’s notably also golden specks there—a ray of hope for him to be better? Or maybe a nod to his noble lineage.

The chocolate sauce makes this cupcake feel very decadent but also adds to the dark look of it. I would say it resembles blot, but none of the other OB boys have this same feature. Maybe a hint at Leona’s depressive traits?

Wishful thinking on my part, but Leona’s cupcake is the only one in his dorm with a large splash of green (thanks to the leaves there). I like to think it’s him “turning over a new leaf” and turning his sights onto his internship + working toward helping to help preserve nature and discover energy efficient methods to help his country.

His cupcake is the “tallest” in Savanaclaw (because of how high his frosting is)—he’s obviously the leader of the pack.

Ruggie

Very decadent cupcake. A large scoop of ice-cream, nuts, pastries, tons of cream and frosting… it looks like someone just piled on all their favorite desserts (which suits a glutton like him). Even his own cake looks like it’s about to burst out of the liner!

Two donuts inserted in, because 1) they’re Ruggie’s favorite and 2) two is better than one!

The scattered chunks of chocolate resemble the pattern on the coat of a spotted hyena, which is what Ruggie is.

Jack

WHY DOES HIS CUPCAKE JUST STRAIGHT UP LOOK LIKE HIM… The two paler frosting peaks are his ears, the two-tone swirl results in his hair but also results in the high peak of his tail.

This cupcake has a lot of nuts (I see a walnut, a cashew, maybe crushed peanuts, and many whole hazelnuts). Maybe because Jack is “a tough nut to crack” due to his stoic and standoffish attitude? But we all know he’s a sweetheart deep down, perhaps why the most abundant of these nuts is hazelnuts, often used in many desserts and especially paired with chocolate.

xvsjwveiwk This is a slightly unserious note but there’s something whitish that night be dried coconut??? Sprinkled on the cake… I-Is that Jack shedding/j

Octavinelle

Each Octavinelle cupcake has a black macaron decorated to resemble their dorm uniform hats! The filling is purple (like Octa’s usual color) and has candy pearls (since they’re from the sea).

Their names are written in an elegant flowing font, with emphasis on the first letter of their names (slightly bigger than the other letters). It provides an impression that differs from the other letters in their names, much like how the Octatrio themselves can be deceptive.

A bowtie that matches what each boy wears in his dorm uniform.

The sprinkling of little purple pearls could really be nothing, but they could also be all the powers/abilities they have collected together.

Azul

The single chocolate stick (not two, unlike Cater and Trey’s) could pass as a straw, making the whole cupcake appear like a drink. Makes sense, the Mostro Lounge has a 1 drink minimum + his Dorm Uniform vignette is all about how he wants to buy the rights for the popular Mystery Drink from Sam.

A little contract and writhing chocolate tentacles pair nicely together. Together, they represent his UM and how his tendrils reach out to pull people into deals.

Azul also has a scoop of ice-cream, but it is notably VERY different looking than Ruggie’s. Azul’s is much smaller (because he moderates what he eats and how much) and neater too (because he cares about his tidy appearance).

There is a swirl of purple frosting on the bottom but most of the frosting is white and piled high. The former must be Ursula’s skin, and the latter her hair, as it is similar in shape.

His cupcake liner has the widest stripes (because he used to be overweight in the past) and has little purple dots (maybe in reference to the suctions on his tentacles).

Azul keeps the spiral seashell that resembles Ursula’s necklace.

Azul's cupcake goes from purple to white, which may denote his transition from octopus merman to human.

Tweels

The twins have a scalloped seashell that splits in half, representing the other brother. The way the shell divets also makes it look like a heart shape, implying the brothers “share a heart” or perhaps calling back to how both of their UMs involve “the heart” (Shock/Bind the Heart).

Their frosting is the color of their hair, even containing a stripe of black (in opposite directions) to match their hair. The frosting also seems to be slightly textured, which matches the gills and scales on their merforms.

The peak of the frosting resembles the ends of their eel tails flicking in opposite directions.

Three diamond-shaped “scales” on each cupcake; this is ghe same shape and design as the earrings they wear.

A ring of purple frosting is included; this could represent Azul, someone whom the twins closely work with and consider a great source of amusement. It’s telling that the purple frosting is below the teal frosting, as the twins have made it clear before that they’re not his minions or “below” him, they act independently and choose to follow Azul because they want to (and have the agency to leave whenever).

Jade

Jade’s cupcake liner has the most numerous and thinnest vertical stripes. There is also a very fine zigzag running through the liner. Very similar to Jade’s teeth arrangement and how they present as small but frequent.

Jade's cupcake stays a consistent color throughout the creation process.

Floyd

Floyd’s cupcake liner is in the middle of Azul and Jade’s in terms of line spread and thickness. The zigzag is also more elongated than Jade’s, matching Floyd’s more easygoing personality between the two twins. He’s also more likely to show his full teeth!

Floyd's cupcake goes from gold to teal, but Jade does not do the same or even the reverse. Maybe this hints at how Floyd is the more fickle brother?

Scarabia

Scarabia cupcake liners are color blocked with solid black and a deep red with an intricate golden pattern. Matches their dorm uniforms well!

They have snake biscuits with their names in bold, blocky all capital letters for impact. The biscuit shape suits the Sorcerer of the Sands. The text choice… I’m not sure, maybe to match the “casual streetwear” style of the dorm…? Or the dorm leader’s brazenness and overt friendliness?

Kalim

His earrings have been made into an edible version!

Thumbprint cookies that resemble glistening jewels! This, plus the colorful sugar pearls, represents Kalim’s immense wealth.

There’s a bow tied around his cupcake liner, which matches the cloth he wears around his head in many outfits of his.

The feathers that transition in color are for Kalim’s love of animals and willingness to accept others of all kinds (“colors”). This could also be a reference to his Dorm Uniform vignettes, where he pulled off a trick that made white birds appear to be “rainbow”.

At first I thought the white puffy frosting was to look like the Sultan’s turban, but wouldn’t they make it smoother and resemble one cohesive lump in that case…? Then I realized the white frosting actually resembles a CLOUD 😭 which fits Kalim so well, since he takes his friends out on magic carpet rides…

The red peak poking out of the top could be like… the domed roof of a tower, since there is one both for the Sultan’s palace and in Scarabia dorm. The white sprinkles/coconut shreds on the red part also gives the impression that the roof just poked through the clouds www

VERY tiny detail but if you look closely you’ll notice that Kalim’s cupcake is… lumpy… almost as though he tried baking for the first time himself and messed it up a little, so Jamil took over decorating for him to cover up the mistakes. (That’s headcanon anyway, lol)

Jamil

Jamil’s cupcake is a two-tone twirl thar matches the colors of his dorm AND the turban he wears when he overblots.

We have the classic red feather, three golden orbs, and a thumprint cookie (again, resembling a jewel) to match Kalim’s and to match Jamil’s hair accessories!

The little bits of gold sprinkled around are hard to place but maybe it’s to show how Jamil has to put Kalim first and foremost while his own feelings get dismissed/belittled/treated as less important.

Large chunks of chocolate on top! Not sure what this could be, but a part of me wants to believe it’s his depressive or defeatist traits, since Leona also has chocolate, but scattered. (Can you tell I loved these two’s interactions in book 6?)

Finally, we come to the enigmatic and out-of-place golden squiggle. Someone as meticulous as Jamil couldn’t possibly have intentionally placed that there, right…? Allow me, if you will, to circle back to the “Kalim was trying to bake with Jamil” theory… What if, while Jamil was decorating Kalim’s cupcake to cover up the unevenness of the cake, Kalim tried to thank Jamil and repay the favor by decorating Jamil’s cupcake??? And it resulted in… that squiggle… so Jamil had to roll with it and make the rest of his cupcake look as aesthetically pleasing as possible.

Pomefiore

All Pomefiore names are written in elegant script on a chocolate disc that is also stamped with the stars and moons of their dorm.

The cupcake liners have the same stars and moons pattern and has the colors of Pomefiore.

Vil

Similar to Riddle, Vil has a crown to show that he is the dorm leader. His is, of course, a different design to reflect a different queen (the Fairest Queen, not the Queen of Hearts).

The frosting has a slight gradient which is the same as the tips his hair.

The golden leaves match the leaves on the back of his dorm leader tiara/crown.

There are berries on top; notably, a red one still has a bit of leaf and branch stuck to it, making the berry look like a red apple (you know, cuz the Evil Queen used one to poison Snow White).

Vil has golden dust and two types of round candies evenly dispersed on the cupcake. It shows us how clean and yet elegant his personal style is.

Rook

Rook's cupcake has a very unique shape that is not quite like any other student's. Indeed, his cupcake resembles his hat (note the little feather sticking out of the top purple part) and bangs (the lower yellow part).

The purple part looks like it is made with an extruder and results in a texture similar to the top of a mont blanc; this is probably to help differentiate it from the smoother texture of the yellow beneath. Since the purple is a hat, the texture is most likely to make it seem more "fabric-like".

The yellow part + the color change from yellow to purple may also be a reference to how he was originally in Savanaclaw, but then transferred to Pomefiore.

An edible bow and arrow motif befitting of a skilled huntsman!

The squiggle line here seems to be showing the path of his arrow, which always finds its mark. Additionally, Rook himself is a tricky person and usually employs roundabout strategies or misdirecting ways to achieve his goals.

At the end of the arrow's path is a cluster of what seems to be pomegranate seeds, which seems odd and something more befitting of Idia or Ortho (who have ties with Hades; there is a tale about Hades having Persephone eat a pomegranate fruit which dooms her to spending half of her time in the Underworld). However, I think here the pomegranate seeds are meant to be... like... an artistic, abstract depiction of blood once the arrow strikes its target.

There's blueberries on top, an element he has in common with Vil (someone whom he devotes himself to). The leaves here with the berries tie Rook to the wild, both as a huntsman and has an ex-Savanaclaw student.

Epel

The pale purple color of the frosting is the same as Epel’s hair!

Unlike Vil’s sprinkled-on decorations, Epel’s are not spread out evenly and instead cluster at the top. This may be attributed to their different levels of maturity, as Vil and more knowledgable than Epel, who expresses outdated views on gender and has a limited understanding of the world due to coming from a very rural area.

There’s a fine shimmer on Epel’s cupcake—probably because his arc in book 5 was about learning to appreciate and weaponize his beauty.

Two apple slices because… well, when you think of Epel, you think of apples and the Felmier family business!

There seems to be a little bit of yellow peaking out from the cake? Are those more apple slices or an apple filling…?

The pale frilled strip of frosting resembles a lace collar, something which Epel wears in his school uniform.

Epel is the only member of Pomefiore to have a cupcake which LACKS a blueberry (or really any berries at all). This is a subtle indication that he is the “odd one out” within the dorm, as he, unlike Rook, is not conforming to the standards set by his dorm leader.

Ignihyde

The Ignihyde cupcake liner has the same black and blue geometric look as their dorm uniform jackets.

I don’t know how to really describe the font their names are written in, but the way the letters are cut reminds me of a “Greek” style of text (similar to this).

Their names seem to be displayed on Oreos chocolate sandwich cookies with Ignihyde blue fillings. Counting the parts (2 cookies, the cream filling), there’s three in total, which matches the count of the heads of Cerberus, as well as how many Shroud brothers there are.

Both Idia and Ortho have what look to be confetti cakes as the base for their cupcakes, Because of the dark color of the cake and the bright color of the sprinkles, it creates the impression of stars in the night sky—maybe to reference Star Rogue, their favorite video game.

Idia

The skull-shaped technomantic device Ida uses to launch his magic spells tops off his cupcake.

On either side of the skull device are candies (?) that look like the same light sticks Idia is super into waving around at his beloved idols’ concerts.

The blue frosting is meant to look like his fiery hair!

Idia’s cupcake goes from a red gradient to a blue one. His hair actually goes change color like this based (on his mood), We’ve seen his hair go from blue to red from anger and/or determination and passion in both book 7 and in his Dorm Uniform vignettes.

Ortho

This cupcake seems to represent both the deceased Ortho and the current android Ortho.

Not sure what it is, but there’s something with a cybernetic glowing design that implies a circuit board; this is part of the internal parts which make up robo!Ortho.

There’s some kind of sauce with sprinkles over the top of that layer; this could be the blot that makes up phantom!Ortho, since we usually don’t associate the “dripping” of the sauce with robo!Ortho.

The smaller dollop of blue frosting is Ortho’s fiery blue hair. He’s smaller and younger than Idia, so the flames do not consume the entire cupcake. (Alternatively, this could also be the fire-shaped bottle that serves as phantom!Ortho’s head.)

Under the frosting is a cookie and a thin ring which resembles the ring of glowing triangles that appears around robo!Ortho’s neck. A similar pattern appears around the neck of phantom!Ortho.

This cupcake’s cake is a lighter color than Idia’s cake. It also has a larger variety in the sprinkle colors, maybe as a nod to Ortho’s cheerier and more hopeful personality compared to Idia’s gloomier and pessimistic one.

Diasomnia

The Diasomnia cupcake liners are black with a green briar pattern.

Each student’s name is piped in chocolate, with the third years in white and the underclassmen in what seems to be milk chocolate.

The cupcakes seem to be malformed or sort of puffy like Kalim’s is. I wonder if that means Lilia roped all of his kids to bake with him as a bonding exercise www

Malleus

Malleus’s cupcake goes from Diasomnia green to black (the royal color of the Draconia bloodline), symbolizing the eventual transition he must make from student to king of his country.

The frosting on top is the same colors as he night sky sprinkled with silver stars. Malleus likes to take solitary strolls under the cover of night, so this suits him.

Malleus wouldn’t be Hornton/Tsunotaro without the horns! Of course we’ve gotta include a chocolate version of his iconic horns.

Extra frosting in a bright green; these are meant to be Malleus’s apocalyptic green fire that he spouts.

There’s a purple grape cut into two (I’m sure Rollo would be furious/j) to reveal the green insides. How curious! These colors are also considered accent colors for Maleficent. Another nice detail about the grapes is that the veining of the flesh makes the insides resemble reptilian eyes—like those of a dragon.

Lilia

The frosting is black for Lilia’s hair and has magenta (berry?) sauce to reflect his hair streaks.

Lots of berries (Lilia loves his berry juice) and irregular pink sprinkles or candy shards. It’s cute, punky, and whimsical, just like he is.

Chocolate bats for the bats that swarm Lilia in many animations. He’s also shown taking care of a bat in his Dorm Uniform vignettes.

I’ve been trying to figure out what the whole cream is… My best guess is they’re representing Malleus, Sebek, and Silver??? Silver and Sebek are the smaller two dollops since they grew up and trained together + are the most immature of the group. Malleus is the big, textured swirl on the left—he is older and more powerful than Sebek and Silver. This analogy also works when you consider that these three sit upon Lilia (the cupcake), who is the oldest and serves as the father figure and foundation for their dorm to get along with each other and with others.

I don’t know what that ahoge-like thing is supposed to be or mean—

Silver

His cupcake goes from a deep blonde/yellowish brown to silver. This reflects his hair color change following Lilia’s blessing.

Silver’s cupcake has a very dreamy and cloud-like quality to it because of the abundance of pastel-colored cream. The top of the frosting even droops over, sort of like a head dropping in sleep.

Crushed bits of an aurora-colored candy are sprinkled over the cake. They’re the same color as his eyes, as well as the ring gifted to him by his parents.

Two birds and some mint (?) leaves make up the colors of the Three Good Fairies (Flora, Fauna, and Merryweather). They also speak to Silver’s familiarity with the forest creatures.

Sebek

The pastel green frosting for Sebek’s cupcakes is sloped, and it is the only one styled this way. It may represent his lopsidedly views and understanding of the world, as he is easily one of the most rigid thinking within his dorm.

Many different things are sprinkles on the cupcake; it looks like someone threw them on thinking they would look cool with very little thought or planning. It fits how brazen Sebek is and also (funnily enough) matches his struggle with the arts.

Sebek is the only student with triangular sprinkles; is this meant to look like scales?? Or maybe particles of lighting?

There’s a massive chocolate lightning bolt topping off the cupcake. Nothing subtle or tactful about it, much like Sebek’s personality and voice.

There are two pieces of sliced grape to mimic Malleus’s cupcake. Interestingly, the grape halves seem to come from entirely different kinds of grapes: one green (unlike Malleus’s), the other red (like Malleus’s). Assuming the red half (which Malleus has two of) implies fae heritage (Malleus is full fae), then the green half is one’s human heritage. The grapes, then, denote Sebek being of half fae, half human descent.

Extra

Grim

He has a unique black and white vertically striped cupcake liner to represent Ramshackle dorm!

Grim’s name is written on a cookie that looks like a puffy manga text box. Makes sense, he’s usually being the mouth piece for Yuu when they don’t get dialogue options or even when they do.

Seems to be covered in sanding sugar to achieve the fuzzy texture of fur!

Little wafer (?) shaped like Grim’s tail! And cookies (?) iced to resemble his ears! Two paw prints 🥺 to match Grim’s toe beans… The cupcake truly is made in his image!!

The white shell border is probably a stand-in for the white tuft of fur that Grim has.

[j0kers-light]

His Lighthouse: Love In The Club (LedgerJoker x f!reader)

Love In The Club

series summary:  

Y/n is an aspiring writer living in Gotham City and struggling to find her next muse. Her recent novel is getting all the buzz, earning her far more attention than she signed up for. But when a chance encounter results in her nursing The Joker back to health, will she find the time to write another best seller or will her own story become front page of the Gotham Gazette?

chapter summary:

Girl's night has finally arrived bringing more issues and drama for both Joker and Y/n to face. More separation will put their growing relationship to the test or will an unknown variable bring them even closer?

author’s note: 

Hey hi! Thank you for patiently waiting as I crafted this looong chapter! It's over 15K!! I thought about cutting it in half but again, where's the fun in that? Sit back with a snack and a drink and enjoy the ride!

PLEASE READ: I recommend listening to "Love In The Club" by Jvck James both his original version and the Apple Music Home Session release to really immerse yourself in the inspiration for this chapter. You won't regret it! 

Taglist!

@blackreaderatrisk   @twinkledinkle @clemdango04 @l3ejm @tears-of-amber @what-an-angell @kaidennnnn @darthjokerisyourfather @thatsnoteii @nanalover00

Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!

Last Chapter  | Next Chapter 

Joker was on the move the second you entered the florist center.

He considered the grocery trip over and hauled the cart full of goods towards the checkout area. He tossed some junk food into the cart along the way knowing you would scold him out for it later but honestly, he didn't care. Late night munchies hit him hard and at the most random of times. If he didn't have pop tarts or something equivalent, well.. you didn't want him blowing up buildings to fight off a sugar craving now did you?

It was either sweets or citywide destruction. The box was $4.98.

He did find it odd that an organic and healthy food store like EverFresh sold fattening products. He'd contemplate that contradiction later.

He approached a cashier dreading this portion of the trip. Even though he flirted with various customers and employees in the store, actually talking to one person for an extended period of time would be more than what he signed up for.

Joker just wanted to stay by your side but you denied him that simple request. He was not going to patiently wait around while you talked to your friend. He had better things to do like worry about tonight's festivities.

Like hell he was letting you leave Gotham's city limits without some form of security. You didn't understand just how serious Dent's bounty on your head was. Hiding at Wayne's Manor for eighteen days did absolutely nothing but get on Joker's nerves.

When you had beef with a crime boss, it was for life. You would never be safe until Dent was removed from the picture because Joker refused for you to be killed by the former district attorney.

Your safety remained a top priority to Joker even though you considered the situation officially handled. He didn't expect you to know any better (especially since you were a civilian) so he made it his responsibility to look after you.

It was kinda like his way of paying you back for barging into your life and for letting him use your penthouse as a hiding place. You were already risking so much for him. He wouldn't know what he'd do if you died on his watch.

Joker slammed the cartons of milk on the conveyor belt too roughly just thinking about it.

The cashier jumped but still smiled sheepishly at him. She took her sweet time enjoying the view, i.e Joker, although he hardly noticed. Bright and cheery blondes weren't his type. You ruined him for any future women.

"Find everything okay?" The repetitive beeping noise was amplified when Joker didn't reply.

He watched as each item appeared on the display screen and calculated up the total in his head. His mask covered his lips from view as he mouthed each brand name as a stress reliever. The cashier eyed her coworker who was bagging the groceries. Antisocial, but he was still hot.

"Would you like to opt in for our same-day home delivery? It's ideal for members that live further– Excuse me? Sir?" She got Joker's attention by shaking a bag of granola before scanning it.

His glare pinned her to the spot. She never saw eyes so complex. A chill went up her spine at the vibrant pine staring straight into her soul.

She spooked when she heard his voice, "That sounds.. lovely."

It was low and raspy yet she could hear the power it held. Authoritative and captivating; she was instantly weak in the knees.

"O-oh-okay um wow. I-I, um do you have your member's card?"

Joker twirled your white EverFresh card in between his fingers and quirked an eyebrow.

He had to sell the mysterious musician or whatever you said he looked like. It didn't make a difference to him. As long as he wasn't discovered. Joker could tell this bimbo of a cashier was buying into his disguise. The bagger too. All because he looked like their dream man he was able to avoid detection. Pathetic.

"I need to scan it sir. Can you–" She reached out to take the card from Joker but he kept it out of her grasp all because he wanted to toy with her. He hummed when she blushed and eventually snatched the card from him.

Sexual frustration was oozing off of her. Easy prey. Joker thought.

Her eyes widened when she read the profile assigned to it. "Oh! This is Y/n L/n's card. What's your relation to her?"

"She's my.." Joker stopped himself. What is Y/n to me? He pondered. An asset? Lover? A means to an end?

Joker wasn't one to put labels on things but he felt you were worthy of one. "She's my roommate." He replied. It left a sour taste in his mouth.

The cashier made an unsure noise and typed something on her register keyboard.

"I'm sorry but Miss L/n is the sole user. I can't use this card without her verbal authorization when she's not present."

This woman was gonna be a pain in the rear it seems.

Joker sighed and out of the corner of his eye he spotted the bagger walk off, hopefully not to bring unwanted attention to the scene. A noisy manager was the last thing Joker needed. He couldn't blow his cover but he still had a few tricks up his sleeve to get his way.

He curled his fingers for the poor cashier to come closer. As much as she knew it was a bad idea, she did, and Joker quickly leaned over to whisper in her ear.

Good thing you were distracted with your friend. Joker didn't know if you would've been intrigued or jealous. In two seconds flat the cashier was giggling uncontrollably and bypassing the block on the card.

"I'm so sorry! Haha! Don't worry about the home delivery, it's free on this transaction but keep that between us. Blythe!" She signaled to her coworker who was returning with more recyclable bags.

"Contact delivery and let them know they have an expedited service to complete." She winked at Joker and tapped her screen again.

"Alrighty then, your total is... $382.41. Cash or card?"

Joker grinned behind his mask. "Cash."

Joker stepped out of EverFresh vowing to never return. The healthy conscious cult-like store sucked the last of his patience dry and he had half a mind to level the establishment to the ground with explosives.

Today he learned that organic toilet paper existed. It was a fact he could have gone without. He really needed a cigarette or something to get his mind off of committing acts of violence. He patted his pockets but remembered that he wasn't wearing his suit with its infinite pockets and secret stashes.

Joker rolled his eyes to the sky and let a string of curses fly from his mouth. A lady walking by covered her son's ears and scoffed. He held back the urge to flip her off. Or worse, stalk her back to her place and kill her and the rest of her family in their sleep. It was a good idea the longer he thought about it...

No! What would Y/n think? It's not worth it.

He didn't want you thinking so poorly of him. He couldn't return to your side with their blood smeared on his hands and expect your love. He didn't want to scare you away; this dark side of him always scared people and yet his mind continued down a dark spiral.

Monster. Freak. She'll never love you. Why should she? It spat into his eardrums and he almost believed it.

It wasn't healthy to listen, however he was powerless to stop the voices once they began. He needed a distraction. Then he remembered one. He had to protect you somehow tonight. Your safety was important. You were important. No matter how loud the voices were, he could never forget you.

You didn't see him as The Joker but as a normal human being. No matter how broken and twisted he was, you still looked at him with those adoring eyes of yours. You always gave him your undivided attention. Your patience and kindness were everything to him. You gave Joker a sense of meaning. A sense of peace. He gave you nothing but pain.

Regardless of that fact, you let Joker in. Not just into your life, oh no. Joker knew he had a place in your heart as well. He didn't deserve to but he was a greedy man. He'd fight tooth and nail to get what he wanted.

And he wanted everything you could give and even then, it still wouldn't be enough.

Joker exhaled from his nose and finally calmed down. What would he do without you? He couldn't thank you enough for being the buffer between him and his more.. violent self.

You knew who Joker was and what he represented and he wanted to maintain that façade you created of him. You saw Joker as a roommate. Not a monster. So he would play the part. But behind your back? He was evil personified.

Joker moved off to the side and pulled out his burner phone. He dialed the only number programmed on it and waited. It rang exactly four times before someone answered. They knew not to speak until Joker said something.

"Did you pick up the dry cleaning?" It was an average conversation to the untrained ear but the person on the other end knew the code.

"I forgot, but I can." They replied before hanging up.

Joker placed his phone back into his pocket and made his way to the meeting spot. It wasn't far of a walk but he didn't want to rush and bring unwanted attention to himself. He had to keep in mind he was still on the run from the authorities and Batman.

He kept things low key as he walked towards the back alley of a laundromat business twenty minutes after the call.

Joker walked in and acknowledged the workers on duty washing, folding, and steaming linens. The place reeked of bleach and other cleaning chemicals. The temperature was stifling but Joker chose to ignore it and walked to an unmarked door and knocked thrice. It opened and Frost stepped to the side for his boss to enter. Since it was a last minute meeting, only need-to-know personnel was there which consisted of the top three.

Mac's blond hair was tipped back and hanging over his chair but he sat up when the main man walked in. "Nice fit, Boss!"

Neo was texting on his phone but took the time to smack Mac upside the head. The latter flipped him off until Frost's hands slammed on the cheap folding table in the center of the room. "Knock it off." He warned.

Joker rolled his eyes at their antics.

He made himself comfy at the head of the table and then proceeded to rip his mask off. All three men were shocked to see him sans makeup. It was rare that Joker went around without his signature makeup and out of everyone in his organization, only the three men present had the pleasure of seeing his bare face.

Frost was the veteran of the group and he still shifted in his seat at the sight. "So what's on the table? Is Two Face acting up again?"

Grumbles and expletives erupted from the table. Everyone had a bone to pick with the binary burn victim. Joker smacked his lips and waved off their concern.

"Now that? ThaT.. would be easy to handle but no. I need a lit-le favor. It's Y/n again. Ya see—"

Mac sighed, earning Joker's curiosity, although he didn't miss a beat filling them in on your plans tonight. The other two goons nodded along and even shared some good insight but Mac wasn't having it.

"Great, so now we're beefing up our security because little Miss writer wants to party? I call bulls__t."

Only the sound of laundering done in the next room could be heard after his outcry.

Frost shook his head. Neo's hazel eyes darted back and forth between Joker and Mac before he focused back on his phone.

He didn't want to see this. It was finna get ugly real quick. That would've been the case before when Joker didn't have any patience. Now he just patiently waited and that was even more terrifying.

"I didn't know you had issues with Y/n. Care to tell me the source of that, uhh, frustration?"

Mac was the most opinionated of the top three but the pretty boy knew when to keep his mouth shut. The bad blood between you and him must've really bothered him to speak up about it.

It was becoming a big inconvenience that Joker wasn't wearing his normal suit. His ripped jeans and long sleeve shirt couldn't conceal all the knives and other goodies he used to carry around to intimidate people with. That's not to say he couldn't harm a person without a weapon. Joker's glare alone had Mac squirming in his seat.

And he quickly backtracked to save his skin. "N-No it's nuthing like that I promise, Boss. She and I exchanged some words back at her publisher's office that I feel she ain't redeemed herself from."

Neo tossed his phone on the table and rounded on the blonde with an attitude. "Come off it my guy. I pointed a gun at her and we still on speaking terms!"

"You did whaT?" Joker growled. Neo paled, realizing he let that slip out.

Frost face palmed. They were asking for Joker's wrath at this point. Out of these three you had more cause to dislike him the most. But did you see him complaining about it?

Frost decided to bring order back to this meeting. "So.. is this club here in Gotham? We'll assign some goons around the place. No biggie."

Green eyes flickered away from Mac and Neo to his right hand man. Deep breathes. No need to blow a fuse. Maybe he wasn't explaining the situation properly because they weren't seeing the issue here.

"No. It's out of state." Joker saw when the lightbulbs clicked on. Finally everyone was on the same page.

"I want this kept between us. Under-stand? Yes?" He looked around the table for any naysayers.

Light brown eyes hesitated and Joker zeroed in on it. "Will thaT be a problem, Neo?"

He sighed. "No Boss. I had plans but I can work around 'em."

Frost raised an eyebrow to tease his fellow coworker. "I'd cancel them if I were you"

Neo seethed. "It won't be a problem."

"Great!" Joker clapped his hands once. All eyes were back on him. "Now that's settled. Frost, I trust you with the finer details. The rest.. I'll leave to the two of you. I don't want anyy mistakes." Joker looked down at an imaginary watch. "Well. Gotta run!"

His jester smile was more unnerving without his red paint on. They all watched Joker place his mask back over his face and stand. If they didn't know beforehand, their Boss looked like an average citizen. It was his best disguise to date.

Each of them waited until he left the room to finally relax. Mac breathed a heavy sigh of relief. He was off the hook for now. Frost and Neo shared a look and took pity on their fellow henchman. Were it so easy.

Joker wouldn't forget any grievances against Y/n. You were a touchy subject best left alone. The blond would have to tread carefully for the next few weeks to get back on Joker's good side. Not like there is one to begin with.

Nevertheless, it would be a long night and it was almost two pm.

The subway ride back to your place was excruciatingly boring. It was completely uneventful if you ignored the fact just about every male catcalled or eye raped you on the way there.

You were instantly self conscious of your dressy outfit and blamed Joker for giving you the initial confidence to walk to the grocery store with Louboutin heels and a halter top in broad daylight. Make no mistake you felt amazing when Joker shadowed you. Now that he was gone, you questioned your tight jeans and exposed shoulders.

You ducked behind corners, stuck with the crowd, and kept your head down all the way to your place. The tall white building welcomed you back with open arms.

Your heels clicked loudly on the lobby's marble floors and you jumped when the front desk employee called your name.

"Just a second Miss L/n! There's a delivery from EverFresh here for you." Henry said.

You glanced at the person standing near the front. It was a male wearing a white polo with an EverFresh logo printed on its collar. He waved at you expectantly.

"Is it alright to bring your groceries up?"

How did he beat you here? Then you remembered they had a van whereas you were stuck to public transit and then forced to endure even more walking. You almost agreed but then stopped yourself. You didn't know if Joker was back or not.

"Yes well.. actually. I need to check and make sure my cat isn't out. He's not too friendly with strangers."

Using that little white lie again? Classy, real classy, Y/n. You shushed your subconscious.

They both watched as you power walked to the elevator. With a mash of a button, the shiny doors opened with a soft ding. You stepped inside and stared at your reflection in the mirrored walls as they boxed you in.

You looked stunning yet you felt the exact opposite. Your mental state hadn't fully recovered from the last twenty four hours. The physical reminders were hidden under concealer and tight smiles but the memories remained. Tonight would prove to be a much needed reset for you. Eight o'clock couldn't get here fast enough.

The trip to the twelfth floor was done in silence and you stepped onto your private floor, rehearsing your lines. You were gonna read Joker to filth for charging your card to high heaven. But as you unlocked the door, the foyer was vacant.

You prowled the open space searching for your green haired roommate. He wasn't in the massive living room nor in the dining space that flowed into the kitchen. A peek inside your spare room and the main bath turned up empty. You checked the storage room, laundry, and your empty fourth bedroom that Joker didn't know about before stopping in front of his guest room.

The door was closed but that didn't stop you from barging in with an insult hot on your tongue. However it died on your lips when no Joker was found.

He wasn't here. Your heart skipped a beat.

You blinked back your tears and spoke aloud to calm your nerves. "No need to get all bent out of shape Y/n. Joker is a big boy, he can handle his own. A heads up would have been nice.. but worry about your missing roommate later. Call the front desk. Focus on getting ready for tonight. Joker can wait."

You nodded to yourself and closed his door, mentally and physically pushing him into a corner of your mind, before pulling your cell out.

You scrolled until you found the front desk logo and hit the dial button. It rang a bit until Henry's voice answered the phone. "NGR front desk, how can I assist you today?"

You smiled at his kind voice. "Um yes hi. This is Y/n, you can send the delivery up. Thank you."

He hung up to authorize access.

You tidied up the kitchen a bit knowing the groceries would be brought directly in here. You and Joker cleaned the dishes before leaving but it was a nervous habit to clean. You couldn't stand a dirty environment.

Your nervous tick spread from the kitchen to the living room as you straightened up the couch pillows, groaning at the layer of dust on your furniture, and you considered hiring housekeeping downstairs to clean your place back up to your standards.

The two weeks and four days hiding at Wayne Manor did quite a number on your place. You could start cleaning now but Florence would literally murder you if you called and cancelled tonight's plans. And there was no way you could cook lunch, wash and style your hair, find an outfit, get dressed, and clean up before eight.

The clock in the kitchen ticked closer and closer to the top of the hour. Hopefully the girls would overlook the one time your home wasn't picture perfect.

You did however pick up Joker's ridiculous panda suit and shove it in the back of the coat closet in the hall. And just in time. The doorbell rang and its posh tone sent a shiver down your spine. You hated your doorbell. Your closest friends knew to knock.

You opened the sleek black door to the charming fellow you saw downstairs. He waved again and you swept your arm, gesturing for him to come in. He pushed a delivery dolly inside loaded with white crates that held your groceries.

He must've noticed your look of confusion. "Hi. This is just the first load. I couldn't carry everything up by myself."

"Oh no worries. If you set that down in the kitchen I can start unloading while you go back down and grab the next trip."

"That'll be great! Good idea." He parked the dolly and heaved the crates onto your counter. Then he scanned the barcode on the side with his powerpad before stepping out to retrieve the next load.

You rolled your eyes at the advanced delivery system EverFresh had. You dreaded the survey they would send to your email to rate your experience with us so we can improve! Times like this you wonder why you didn't shop at a regular store.

'I'm supporting Morgana and I like their selection of meat. Hang in there, Y/n'.

The logo painted crates opened up to recyclable boxes lined with dry ice. You took care not to touch them as you took out the dairy, meats, and vegetables to stock up your barren fridge. The front door opened again and the delivery guy wheeled in another load of groceries and also sat down a handheld tote on the island counter containing fragile goods.

"That's everything. Do you mind signing off?" He looked up from his pad at your backside sticking out the fridge. "D__n.."

You poked your head out of the veggies drawer to blink at him. "Did you say something?"

You didn't hear him. It would've been awkward if you did. His nervous laugh made you eye him warily "Ah nothing Miss. Can you sign off on the shipment?"

You fixed your face and signed your name electronically before walking him to the door. He hesitated but spun around, preparing to ask you out when you cut him off. "Have a great day!"

The door closed right in his stunned face. You didn't need that in your life. Joker was M.I.A and you were getting worried.

"Okay... lunch. What to make for lunch?" You said to distract yourself. It made no sense how you always drew a blank on what to cook after spending so much on groceries. And since Joker was the one that checked out, you wouldn't know the total until you got the monthly statement.

Just thinking about the delivery fee made you want to choke him. "Tsk. He probably thinks it's funny."

You put the last of the groceries in their rightful place and decided on making chicken salad sandwiches once you spotted the artisan bread Joker picked out. That way no matter what time he returned, nothing would go to waste. The leftovers could keep in the fridge.

You made another cheeseboard to go along with the girl's portion of sandwiches, knowing Barbara's motherly instincts would ensure that everyone was hydrated and fed before hitting the streets. It doubled as lunch and dinner since you didn't feel like making anything heavy. Plus if Joker didn't bother to show up why bother cooking for him?

You chopped the green apple a little too aggressively and the dill was practically microscopic in your anger.

It was funny how he scolded you for running away but he could disappear at a moment's notice and it was totally fine. And heaven forbid if you brought it up then you'd be instigating things! You stopped chopping and rested your palms on the counter. The apartment was too quiet and that only made your current mood worse.

The dull sound of chopping echoed in the kitchen as you prepared lunch. Alone.

It was nearing two in the afternoon when you finished up the sandwiches.

They were placed on your favorite glass serving trays and placed in the fridge right next to the cheeseboard for the ladies. Florence thought you were such a housewife for calling it by its actual name, charcuterie board, but she secretly loved them. You always picked the best cheeses and fruits and you designed them around your friend's favorites and what was in season.

You were washing your hands when a loud thud hit your front door. It made you turn off the faucet and back away until you heard keys in deadbolt turning.

It was too early for Florence and Barb to be here and the front desk would've called beforehand rather than just barge in.

You grabbed the chef knife from its holder and braced yourself for anything. Joker did a great job making you forget for the time being that Two Face's men kidnapped you from your home. You couldn't lower your guard not for a second.

Much to your relief it was Joker who walked in like he owned the place. He said nothing, just barreled straight towards your balcony like a man on a mission.

You didn't know whether to be glad he was back or insulted by the cold shoulder. Then you remembered, he left you at the store and racked up a hefty fine with the delivery cost. That alone made you stomp barefoot out onto your private balcony.

Cindy always wondered why you chose the top floor of such an average apartment building. When she came over and saw your massive balcony she understood why.

The large space was divided in half; one portion was protected by the building's glass roof almost like a sunroom but much bigger. It was easily mistaken as an extension of your living room since you kept the sliding door open most of the time. Your houseplants dwelled here amongst a reading hammock, wicker couches, and ottomans. 

The actual 'balcony' was beyond another set of glass sliding doors and was completely open air. A custom dining table similar to the one indoors sat atop a platform and a built in grilling area sat nearby itching to be fired up. It wasn't hot enough for it yet. A string of lights made this part of the balcony cozy and intimate on dark nights and when needed, you and guests could retreat to the enclosed space. It was quite handy for Gotham's notorious rainy days.

But getting back to the matter at hand. You made sure to rattle the door on its track so Joker could hear you coming. If he did hear it, he didn't bother turning around. He remained hunched over the stone railing looking down at the view.

"You forgot something at the store, not like you care about how I made it back but still. Joker? Hello..? I'm talking to you."

You reached the railing and turned him around by his shoulder. Your argument fizzled away once you saw a plume of smoke leave Joker's mouth. You were in awe. He took another drag and respectfully blew it over the edge. The wind carried it away before you could comment about the smell.

"What? Cat got your tongue?" He mumbled after an extended period of silence.

"N-No, I just.. I didn't know you smoked. I mean. I never smelled it on you."

The tip of the cigarette glowed a fiery red in light of your discovery. You were still fascinated by the sight.

Growing up smoking was a nasty habit your mother imprinted in your brain. You tried it once with your poetry club just to know what it was like. One hit, a few coughs, and more laughs from your friends and you were banned from rotation. They never let you take a hit again. Whenever Florence lit up she never did it in your presence although she would accidentally leave her grinder lying around for you to find.

But seeing Joker breathing in nicotine as if it were second nature was hypnotic. Paired with his bad boy attire, he looked every bit the guy you didn't bring home to mom.

He smirked and let the smoke escape his nostrils like the dragon he was. "Hmm. Then whaT do I smell like, doll?"

He let his plume of smoke curl around your head. You weren't standing close enough to get second hand smoking, but it burned your nose a bit. It had a unique smell actually. Nothing like the cheap smokes that clogged your senses and made you gag, no. Joker's was more robust. Along with actually smelling good, it triggered a key sensory response.

You were so dumb.

"You smell like gunpowder, lighter fluid, and something metallic with a hint of peppermint. Wait, that's what it is!" You pointed at his cigarette. "I mistook it for peppermint but it's more akin to cinnamon or that of a cozy fire during the winter. Spicy and heady. I.. like it. It suits you."

Joker froze like a statue. That's what he smelled like to you? He never thought about it honestly.

He worked with knives and blood and his greasepaint at times had a strong smell to it but the way you described him, all comforting and alluring, had Joker's chest tightening up. You made it worse by walking up to him and running your hands from his chest up to his broad shoulders.

He felt you loop your arms around his neck and he held his cigarette away thinking you were planning on kissing him.

"I was supposed to be mad at you for charging my debit card but I can't stay mad at you for long." You sighed to yourself and gazed up at him affectionately.

Joker found himself becoming bashful. Which was a first.

"It wasn't that much Bunny.." Joker mumbled in his defense. Your e/c glare said otherwise.

"They charge by mileage. It might not seem far but to my building, delivery averages out to about a hundred dollars? And with how quickly they got here you probably selected the expedited service. On top of the groceries itself that's what? Five hundred dollars you swiped?"

Joker sighed and flicked his cigarette bud over the balcony. He wasted no time wrapping his arms around you. His scars caught your eye when his tongue darted out to wet his lips.

"Don't. Worry. Your. Pretty. Little. Head." He exaggerated each word with a tap on your nose. You blinked wildly and frowned up. 

"Joker.."

He bent down to steal a kiss. You expected it to be bitter from his cigarette but an explosion of spice hit your tongue instead. He was changing your perspective of smokers big time.

You wondered if it was exclusively a Joker thing. You weren't gonna go around kissing smokers either to collect appropriate data. Joker would have a fit.

"Stooop worrying. You got your groceries. It's... in the past. Shouldn't you be uh, getting ready?"

And just like that the moment you shared was broken.

You squeaked and gripped your hair. "You're right! I have to start getting ready!" You tried to escape Joker's hold but he wouldn't let go.

In fact, he pulled you closer. "Can I help?" He mumbled on the side of your neck.

You glared at him sourly. He was the reason why you had to uninstall your loc braids in the first place. Yet his kisses felt remorseful so you began to cave.

"Or watch..." He suggested with a flick of his tongue on the shell of your ear. "I'm ~perfectly~ fine with just watchin.'

No one could see you up here but the flush of your skin must've been profound. Joker knew exactly how to rile you up.

"Fine." You pushed against his chest. "Meet me in the bathroom. I'll go grab my stuff."

You spun to go but he dragged you back by your wrist. It felt like a dance; it happened so fluidly.

"Ya know Y/n. It would be easier if you just let meee in your room. So you don't have to, uh, keep hauling things back and forth."

Joker knew he said the wrong thing when you tensed up in his arms. He could really use an undo button right about now because your eyes looked sharper than the knives he owned.

"Good point. I don't need your help. I'll get ready in my room instead." You noted.

You managed to escape his hold and was halfway to the sunroom door when Joker grabbed you again. He hated when you got like this. All defensive and distant. He really had to choose his words carefully around you.

"Let go Joker." You mumbled as he held your back to his chest.

He didn't. "Whyyy? So you can hide in your room till time to go? If I'm not allowed to go with you, at least lemme see my Princess get all dolled up."

He used his new nickname for you and it had the same effect as before.

Now there were some names that Joker made up that you absolutely hated, but something about him calling you Princess, or his all time favorite, Bunny, that sent heat straight to your core. He saw you shift your weight from foot to foot.

"Fine. You can w-watch but I swear if you distract me I'll leave!" You sent him a warning glare over your shoulder.

"Mmmm yes ma'am. LooK but don'T touch." Joker thought it would be an easy task until a few minutes later, he realized just how hard this would be.

He sat on the wooden bench in the main bathroom ready for a show and boy did you deliver.

You came in wearing a bikini the same color as your skin complexion. The illusion of being nude was spot on and Joker had to have his hands on you.

You were busy de-tangling your hair but saw his dark figure approaching you from behind through the mirror. His hands grazed your waist before you slapped them away. "No!"

"Yes."

You brandished your comb like a sword and spun around to face him. "You promised! The plan was to look but no touching!"

Joker sucked air through his teeth and made a show of checking you out. "Yeahhhh, but. Do I look like a guy with a plan?"

You weren't buying it. "Sit. Down."

He grinned and returned to his seat at the entrance to the shower. Here he could watch you while avoiding the spray of water. Not like he cared about getting wet; he actually planned on seeing you dripping wet and crying out his name.

You didn't know that would be happening soon. He liked having the element of surprise. What could he say? Ever since Joker got a taste of you he was hooked. He focused back on the present when you walked past him to hop in the shower.

You locked eyes with him for a brief second. A, don't you dare, warning was evident in your e/c orbs but he wasn't phased by it.

You thought you could order Joker around but he was uncontrollable. Many before you have tried. He wished you good luck. It put a smile on his face to know you'll fail just like the rest.

The water absorbing into your bikini and slicking your hair down your back also put a smile on his face. Joker got to see your natural curls appear in real time. Each one was a perfect coil that he wanted to wrap around his finger. With a pout he remembered he was stuck with watching the game from the sidelines. For now.

Once your hair was wet enough you squeezed almost half of the bottle into your hands and worked the shampoo into your curls. You were so lost in your own world you seemed to forget you had an audience when you started to hum.

Joker was mesmerized as your body swayed to a tune of your own creation. Suds fell from the crown of your hair down to your shoulders after the second round of shampoo. He could watch this all day.

That distinctive scent of yours wafted in the air and Joker almost groaned aloud.

Your hair products would be his undoing. Rosemary, lavender, peppermint, and that elusive fruit he still couldn't quite name, invaded his mind. If you smelling this good had this effect on him then he could only imagine how he affected you with his own.

You drugged his senses and the scent was amplified by the hot water you used.

Sitting by the shower door was torture. The smell hit him dead on as it escaped into the bathroom behind him.

He didn't realize just how much time had passed as you stood underneath the spray of water to rinse your hair. Once the water at your feet ran clear you turned the shower off and applied your conditioner. You were thinking of styling your hair into a natural updo so a plastic shower cap was secured over your head to seal in the moisture like a deep conditioner.

You were about to step out of the shower when Joker decided to make his move. He stood to his full height and blocked the entrance. You actually forgot he was there.

"Geez you scared me. Did you enjoy the show?" You chuckled with a roll of your eyes.

You didn't expect Joker to wordlessly nod his head. His eyes were hooded and never left yours, causing you to look away. "Great. Um.. can you move out the way?" You asked. 

He didn't want to. He wanted to advance forward until your back hit the subway tiles and you gasped at him in disbelief. He wanted to rip that stupid plastic off your head— bury his hands in your curly mane and kiss you until you forgot how to breathe. Joker wanted to pick you up, wrap your legs around his waist and make you so late that you couldn't go out with your friends tonight.

Then you would be stuck here with him, tangled in the sheets, begging for him to stop. He wouldn't though. Not until this primal urge, this unknown hunger for you was stated.

But that would be selfish. Joker knew how much tonight meant to you. And since you asked him so nicely, practically begged to go with those teary eyes of yours, it would be cruel of him to foil your plans.

That didn't mean he couldn't get a teeny tiny taste before you left. It would be a long night for him while you were gone. Why not give him something to occupy his mind with until you came back? You had mere seconds before the big bad wolf descended on you.

"Just a little taste, Bunny."

Joker was 'nice' enough to wash your conditioner and comb your freshly washed strands out.

You were going for bouncy effortless curls tamed into a messy, but still stylish updo to offset your dress.

It was the perfect LBD to wear to the club tonight. Not too short that it looked trashy but sparkly enough for the occasion. Florence didn't assign an official dress code so you were following the hot girl summer idea you told Morgana about.

However there was no need for you to dress up when the real party was standing behind you. You were too busy stewing in your seat, mourning the time Joker wasted indulging in his own party. You pleaded for him not to leave any more hickeys before you lost the ability to string coherent sentences together.

Technically he listened. They just weren't on your neck or arms.

Joker ripped your poor bikini to shreds before diving straight into his meal. You swore your eyes rolled to the ceiling and stayed there for the full hour. He stopped to give you breaks and to feed your praise kink before grinning wildly at your dazed expression struggling to stay awake.

Joker was truly a sadist yet in the same breath his aftercare was superb. He helped you wash up in the shower and carried you out when your legs were reduced to jello.

His hands mapped out every inch of your skin while applying lotion and his eyes dared you to move a muscle or stop him. The 'look but don't touch' rule was long forgotten mkay?

All of Joker's sweet gestures were for naught when he dropped you in a chair and ordered you to stay still. He applied the right products you asked him to use and carefully rolled your hair before dragging you to the kitchen. There he ordered you to eat and rehydrate– "Because you lost a lot of fluids, Bunny."

"That you stole." You thought you kicked his leg, unfortunately it was just the island barstool.

That earned you a belly laugh from Joker. You liked the sound of it even if your foot was screaming in pain. It was worth it. Time seemed to fly as you talked about this and that, just enjoying Joker's company as the two of you ate.

His deep hums and short nods were comforting as you discussed something serious and he proved that not only was he listening, but he was retaining the information by firing questions right back at you or repeating something to clarify.

It felt.. nice. Joker soaked up this domestic bliss. He couldn't help but reach over and brush your bottom lip with his thumb.

"You'd look realllly pretty with my red lipstick on baby doll."

You choked on your water. New nickname: unlocked. When you composed yourself and glanced up, Joker was still eyeing your lips. "Y-you want me to wear your lipstick tonight?"

"Yeah. I wanna see it. See you." He left out the part where it was him inadvertently staking his claim on you.

He knew you agreed the moment your eyes dilated.

A jingle chirped from your phone interrupting the moment. You glanced down at the device and paled. "Oh my gosh! It's almost six?!" You pushed your chair back and grabbed the dishes that you and Joker made.

Another chime rang but you were already at the sink, preparing to wash.

"Can you read that new message to me, Joker?" He raised an eyebrow but did as you asked. He leaned over and squinted.

"Mm, poor Cindy can't make it tonight." He sang.

The message came from the girl's group chat and with the girl boss active, everyone else chimed in. He watched your friend Florence send a string of sad emojis followed by Morgana also expressing her disappointment. Then a text came through that he knew you wouldn't like.

He glanced over at the clock and winced. "Uh... Y/n?"

You hummed a yes with your back still turned. It was now or never to tell you.

"Uhhhhh they're coming early. As in. Seven instead of eight earlyyyy."

Joker saw how the information straightened your spine. He eyed your robe and then your hair still in its rollers and knew you would panic. It was an instant reaction. One minute you were washing dishes the next? You were acting like a chicken with its head cut off.

Joker didn't feel awful for grabbing hold of you and shaking you silly. "Go finish getting dressed. I'll handle.. whatever."

You didn't question what his version of whatever was you just ran to your room to get ready.

Joker rolled his eyes hearing the door slam but made his way to the bathroom. If the Commissioner's daughter was on her way, any and all evidence of him being here needed to be erased.

He planned on watching you finish getting all dolled up but the new meeting time put a wrench in those plans. Maybe he could catch a glimpse when you came home.

The first knock came a little after 7pm. Joker had already locked himself in his room for the night. Hopefully none of the girls questioned why that room was off limits.

You were dressed in your mini dress and fastening some drop earrings on when you went to open the door. Morgana was waiting on the other side holding a bouquet of spring flowers.

"Ahh! You remembered. Thank you!" You took the flowers from her but did a double take at her outfit of choice once they were out of the way.

"Is it too much?" She whined. You were speechless. "No. No.."

Her long hair was slicked back with hair gel, giving it a wet look that did wonders for her stunning dress. It was silver and with its drastic plunging neckline, your gaze was drawn to her breasts. She brought more attention to them with a long necklace that was actually a body chain.

"You look..." You trailed off.

She laughed and walked into your apartment with flair. "Sickening!" Her matching heels clicking on the floor confirmed it. Then you saw the back of her dress. Sickening indeed.

"The flowers are gorgeous by the way!" You closed the door softly.

The two of you were talking and munching on fruit from the cheeseboard when the second knock of the night sounded.

"Be right back." Morgana waved you off, too busy checking her phone to care.

You opened the door and Barbara's fiery locks were the first thing you saw. "Okay. I'm feeling super underdressed here." You groaned.

Barbara chuckled and wheeled herself in. "That sounds like a personal problem my friend. We are going clubbing right?"

Wrong answer. Barbara was dressed for the runway. Even seated, you fell in love with her short sequined dress that screamed glamor biker vibes.

When she moved you saw the cut outs traveling down her front. And her shoes!! Black leather thigh highs that glistened in the lights. Various silver rings adorned her fingers and she even added silver embellishments into her high frizzy ponytail. Her natural red mane was the only color to her outfit.

"She is her. Not a crumb left!" She ate up your hype and joined Morgana in the living room.

"So where's the girl of the hour?" She snagged a sandwich and a glass of water that you offered her.

Morgana's focus was on her phone. "Stuck in traffic but almost here. I love how we all coordinated our outfits without consulting with one another!"

The three of you glanced around and sure enough, each of you wore sequins of black and silver.

A round of laughter was shared before Barbara spoke. "Oh wow, I wonder what Florence is wearing then."

"If she's matching we gotta take pictures!" Morgana added.

During their little chit chat, you snuck over to your floor length mirror in the room to add the final touches to your outfit. Joker didn't get to see you before he locked himself in his room and you kinda wanted his opinion on your attire.

Although you matched with the girls you were starting to feel self conscious in your plain dress and heels. Your hair was flawless and came out exactly how you wanted it but something was missing.

While Morgana and Barbara weren't looking you went and grabbed Joker's red lipstick from the bathroom. You held it firmly but for some unknown reason, your hand shook as it hovered near your lips.

Maybe because it was sentimental? It was Joker's. It was his color, his tool to taunt and terrify the city with. Sure it was just an innocent shade found in any beauty store, but the power it held was insurmountable.

You didn't know if it would compliment your skin tone but there was no time to grab another color. The hour was getting closer and closer to eight. You closed your eyes and swiped the hue over your lips.

It was soft to the touch and when you opened your eyes, the opacity was extraordinary. It was perfect. Crazy how a shade of lipstick made you feel powerful. You smirked at your reflection and strutted to the front door to answer Florence's urgent knocking.

The second it unlocked she too sauntered in, a thousand apologies spewing from her dark painted lips.

"Alright b___hes! Sorry I'm late, my Uber driver tried to hoe me. But I have arrived." She raised her arms like an Egyptian and spun in her silver strappy heels.

Everyone's eyes started there and followed the straps up her legs before taking in the scandalous sight that was Florence.

"D__n girl. Is this Euphoria place secretly a strip club?" Morgana whistled. Barbara nodded along thinking the same. 

You on the other hand threw your hands up, huffing. "That's it, I'm done. I'm not going. Why bother when Florence shows up wearing nothing! Do you even have on underwear?"

Florence stopped spinning and struck a pose. 'Um yes?" She pointed to her crystal thong. "I am not getting arrested for public indecency."

"Again." Morgana mentioned. Everyone burst out laughing as Flo made her way to the living room.

"Yeah yeah. Real funny. That was one time and I looked phenomenal. Oooh food!" She picked up a sandwich, thanking you in passing for preparing it.

After a bite or two she took a gander at her squad. "Not all of us matching!" Her feathery sleeves danced in the air as she snapped her fingers. "Question. Is your titties buckled in girl?" She asked once she noticed Morgana adjusting them.

"I have so much tape securing these puppies. Trust me, nothing is slipping. Can't say the same for you potentially flashing someone tonight." She tossed back.

"My goodies are covered in Swarovski crystals darling!" She quoted a famous celebrity and flicked her waist length braids over her shoulder.

Her exotic eyes glanced over at you. "Are my eyes deceiving me? Is Y/n wearing makeup?! Oh, and what time is it?"

Barbara leaned in closer to see. "She is! That red looks beautiful on you Y/n and it's... ten minutes til Flo."

If only Barbara knew who's lipstick she just complimented. It would be your secret for the night.

The time however had everyone jumping to action. Everyone moved as a unit cleaning up the remnants of dinner and polishing off the cheeseboard. Everything else vanished in the rush to leave. Barbara was scheduling an Uber to the airport, Morgana magically acquired alcohol from thin air, and Florence was live streaming and taking shots with her for the 'gram.

This was it. The night had officially begun. Your heart was racing, utterly ecstatic that tonight was about to happen but you still cast a forlorn glance at Joker's bedroom door wishing you weren't leaving him behind.

It felt wrong somehow leaving the state in light of your situation but what could you do? You refused to hide forever. That much was certain, plus you deserved to have some fun.

Morgana was holding the door open for Barbara and Florence was yelling at you to 'put ya heels on and let's go! before you could call off the night. It was too late for cold feet. They would drag you to the plane kicking and screaming if you tried backing out now.

With the girls waiting for you out in the hallway you quickly grabbed your phone and evening clutch before locking your roommate inside.

Florence insisted on giving the Uber driver five stars simply because she was a real one and blasted music the entire way to the airport.

She understood the vibes and scored more brownie points for having a handicap lift installed in her SUV for Barbara to use. The night was off to a good start that only got better once the SUV came to a stop on the tarmac.

A private jet stood waiting with a crew on the steps to greet you all. It was dark but you noticed the red carpet laid out for the girls to walk on. Whoever Florence's client was, he meant business.

The crew was very accommodating to Barbara and her disability. She was the first aboard using a modified lift built into the hull and with the open layout of the plane, she didn't have to worry about leaving the comfort of her personal chair to save non-existent aisle space.

Barbara thanked each personnel that helped and asked for names so she could write a stellar review. If only this were the treatment with commercial flights. She wasn't the only one enjoying the experience. Morgana had yet to shut up about the fancy jet claiming she 'wanted one.'

Along with being handicap accessible, the interior was cream against a wood finish and there was a fresh smell lingering on everything. Florence was too busy taking selfies with you to notice that something was wrong.

The crew went over the required preflight safety demonstration and offered drinks to everyone, however twenty minutes had passed since boarding the plane and it had yet to taxi down the runway.

"Why aint we moving yet?" Florence asked in general.

Morgana looked out the window like the answers were somehow out there. All she could see was a sea of blinking lights and another plane landing on a nearby runway. Almost on cue an announcement sounded from the plane's intercom.

"Hello ladies! This is your Captain speaking. There's been a slight hiccup that we're actively resolving. Please enjoy your refreshments and I'll have us airborne in ten minutes!"

"I hope everything is alright." You said.

Barbara flagged down a stewardess who repeated the same message as the pilot but with a lot more reassurance. True to their word nine minutes later, you all felt the plane start to move. And just in time. Florence was beginning to tap her heels on the floor.

"Hello ladies. Captain speaking again! You know the drill, buckle up until the seatbelt lights are off. In roughly two hours I'll have you all safe and sound in ATL."

You struck up a conversation with Barbara for the duration of the flight while Morgana and Flo charged their phones and talked amongst themselves. The flight itself wasn't long and relatively smooth until the landing wheels roughly touched down on the ground.

"Welcome to Atlanta ladies! Hope everyone enjoyed the flight. Please make sure you don't leave any personal belongings on your way out. Enjoy the rest of the night and I'll be here waiting to take you back home!"

"Geez, he is too hyper for a Captain." Morgana joked while riding the lift down to the tarmac with Barbara.

It was a little odd in your opinion but you still thanked the crew for their hospitality on the way out. You all climbed into the sleek Cadillac idling near the plane.

This one also was modified to accommodate Barbara and she couldn't keep quiet anymore. "I can't wait to meet this client of yours Flo. He thought of everything!"

You and Morgana buckled in your seatbelts, a row in front of them. You verbally agreed, having never seen a modified plane before until today.

Morgana turnt in her seat to face them. "Just confess that you and him been f__ing. It's the only explanation for all of this." The florist teased.

"I just might." Florence said to herself. All she told him was that she and three of her friends were coming to his club. This was all a shock to her too.

He was pulling out all the stops and it was another shock when the SUV pulled up to a massive club in the heart of Midtown. From the street view, the party was in full swing with a long line trailing down the sidewalk. A lo fi beat shook the exterior and street, striking one's curiosity of the place.

"Woah..." Morgana awed.

The dark three story building was illuminated with lights ranging in purple and blue with the title, Euphoria, in bold cursive font on the front. It put clubs in Gotham to shame.

The driver turned the car onto a side street and then pulled into a designated VIP/Valet drop off area. There were two cars ahead being greeted and ushered into the club. The driver whispered something into his suit sleeve and Barbara's former Batgirl instincts bristled.

Her green eyes darted to the side door that was blocked by a heavyweight bouncer who intercepted the driver's message. Even though she was disabled didn't mean she didn't have her wit about her. This was top level security for just an average nightclub.

"Did this.. client of yours ever tell you what he did for a living Flo?" She asked. Her question would have to wait because the SUV door was yanked open from the outside.

"Welcome to Euphoria ladies."

It didn't matter who said it, everyone knew to exit the car. Barbara grumbled to herself and decided to keep her eyes open for the night until she got answers.

Entering the club was like stepping into another dimension.

The spotlights matched the ones outside, purple and blue, and the entire place was rather cool despite the large crowd of swaying bodies out on the dancefloor. The floors were some kind of marble and it absorbed the shock of the many heels clicking on it. Fog machines kept the atmosphere mysterious and three long bars at the front of the establishment were pumping out drinks by the hundreds. Everything moved in sync yet nothing was overbearing.

The first few minutes after arriving to a club were awkward. You had to get your bearings of the place, fall in love with the music, etc.

Morgana pointed out a row of tables off to the side and suggested setting up base there to start off the night. Along the way Barbara was scooping out exit points and other key information, a habit Batman ingrained in her mind. You followed along eyeing the crowd in intrigue.

Florence was over the moon. Her body was already moving to the beat all the way to the table.

Ironic how this one offered a clear view of the exits and the dance floor. Barbara approved of Morgana's choice. Everyone got situated and decided on ordering a round of drinks. You were officially assigned as the DD however you protested that unanimous decision.

"No one is driving! An entire private plane is taking us home!" You shouted over the music.

"Doesn't matter!" The trio shouted back. You sunk into your seat dejected yet still with a smile on your face.

A round of drinks turned into several and before you knew it, girl's night was at its peak. Everyone was loose but had yet to venture out onto the dance floor. The current song drew to a close courtesy of the live DJ who hyped up the crowd and introduced a new but familiar beat to the crowd.

You locked eyes with Florence and the spark was kinetic.

"I know this ain't what I think it is!" She hollered. You shimmied your shoulders along to the intro. "Yessssss it is!" The two of you were scrambling to your feet when you heard Barbara shout.

"Go have fun, we'll be right here!" She and Morgana shared a laugh when Florence all but dragged you to the dance floor.

By then the song was playing into the chorus and the two of you immediately stole the attention of nearby onlookers with your moves. The beat was pulsing through your veins and any lingering thoughts about your dress, or Joker, hell even Two Face wanting you dead, quickly evaporated.

I'm just here for the touch and the rush.. Don't wanna make it better.. Don't wanna make it better..

The lyrics spoke to you personally. Florence must've felt the same since she twirled around you in an impromptu dance routine the two of you performed with a purpose.

It brought you back to Friday nights back in high school when Flo snuck you out of your parent's home to a football game after party or wherever the music was jumping that night. The two of you were from completely different cliques. You from the poetry club and she the stereotypical cheerleader but on the dance floor, you moved as one. Music formed the friendship you had with her today.

So it was safe to say personal space was non-existent between you two. You and Florence suddenly faced each other, lips nearly touching to sing the lyrics to the song.

Girl, leave your ex on read! Don't get in your head....

Whistles erupted from the crowd at the tease but you paid them no mind as you whipped around to slowly grind down Florence's front. Her hands guided you down as she held a note. All eyes were on the two of you when you began to throw it back on Flo.

The Haitian even smacked your behind for fun and giggles, much to the crowd's delight.

Morgana choked on her drink and Barbara cackled at her friend's reaction. "They're really getting into it tonight." Morgana commented.

She watched the both of you grind on each other when the second verse came and went. It was hot to watch yet it fit the atmosphere in the room. There was a break in the scene when you tripped up a bit when Flo spun you around too fast. People were too drunk to notice anyways.

The song began to fade out but Morgana still kept an eye on you and Florence, unable to look away.

"Yeah they are.. I'm glad we all came. So! Let's talk about you! How's that new storefront coming along?" Barbara asked.

The crowd broke out in cheers once the DJ transitioned the song into another popular hit. The second their eyes shifted away, Florence felt a tap on her shoulder. She smiled at the newcomer and shouted something in your direction. You were letting the music control you and didn't hear.

The R&B soul beat was strong and it swiftly guided you through the motions. Nothing else mattered. You drowned out all background noise except for the music.

Men and women came and went trying to dance on you after Florence left but they were scared away by an individual keeping an eye on you. Someone had to. You were too lost in the moment and none the wiser to be aware of your surroundings. But one guy was brave enough and stepped forward.

Usually, you only let Florence dance with you but the person behind you could be an exception to the rule. The body felt familiar somehow so you allowed it.

Someone must've dimmed the nights because the shadows grew and cloaked your new dancing partner with an air of mystery.

At first their hands rested on your hips but they grew embolden and slid up the front of your dress to your breasts. If the music wasn't lowering your inhibitions (you did drink a bit, much to everyone's shock) you still wouldn't have told them to stop once you felt their lips on your neck. It just felt too good.

You tipped your head back onto their shoulder and whined your hips harder on theirs.

You earned a deep satisfied groan for your efforts. The hand fondling your body snaked up to your neck like a custom necklace and the thrill of it resting there had you moaning out loud too.

"I wonder... If I weren't here, would you let any man touch you like this, Bunny?" You paid no mind to the voice but the nickname they used had your eyes blinking open in shock.

You tried to turn around but the hand on your neck squeezed in warning. "Don't. Stop. Now. Keep being a slut and work those hips of yours. Noooo one has to know you've been naughty.. 'cept me."

Joker chuckled in your ear before biting down hard on your neck. You cried out in pain. The current song's bass drowned it out instantly.

His hand bunched the fabric of your dress up and he growled on your skin when he found you bare for him. You tensed up at the angry notes creeping in your ear.

"No panties Y/n? You flew to another city with no.. Oh. Princess. My dirty f__ing slut. You want me to lose my mind huh? No much left of it buuuuut. Why else would you be naked underneath this dress hmm?"

Joker kept up appearances and swayed with your body although you hardly cared. All of your senses were on Joker behind you.

Your brain failed to form sentences. "I-I that's not.."

You didn't want any panty lines in your dress so you went commando. He'd flip his ish when he discovered you weren't wearing a bra either but screw all of that. You were still in shock as to how he got here. Once again you tried to turn around but Joker was always thinking two steps ahead of you.

Nothing could prepare you for the feeling of Joker's fingers rubbing your clit right there on the dance floor.

Your hips bucked involuntarily trying to run away from the assault but Joker pushed you back flush to his body. Your jaw hit the floor in disbelief when he rubbed even faster.

It felt wrong yet so right even as you locked eyes with a girl from across the way.

The dim lights reflected off her dyed hair. She winked at you, almost as if she knew what Joker was doing, and your cheeks tingled in shame. You looked away but it didn't help relieve the pleasure Joker was giving you.

"Joker.. stop. This isn't right.." You glanced at the table where Barbara and Morgana sat but found it empty.

A wave of fear washed over you. Where did they go? Maybe that was what Florence was trying to tell you before she disappeared.

You were snatched from your thoughts by Joker inserting a finger inside. "Your lips are tellin me to stop but she's begging me to keep going." Both of you felt how wet you were. You were practically dripping with arousal. It confirmed Joker's teasing.

Your body was working against you and it didn't take long for a knot to build just beneath your navel.

It was amplified by being out in the open. An energetic couple danced into your line of vision, blissfully unaware you were seconds away from coming. "Go on. Do. It." Joker cajoled in your ear.

Right as you were about to let go, Joker and his touch disappeared. You pitched forward until another pair of hands caught you.

"Girl?! What are you doing!? Florence's friend invited us to the private lounge upstairs." Morgana noticed your shaky legs and flushed cheeks and raised an eyebrow.

You probably looked a hot mess under the flashing lights.

"S-Sorry I ah.. ahem. Lead the way." You pulled your dress back down to its original length and cleared your throat.

She didn't say anything but dragged you to the elevators where Barbara was waiting.

"Took you two long enough." The redhead mashed the button to call the elevator and discreetly eyed your dazed state.

She glanced at Morgana who simply shrugged. The three of you rode the lift to the second floor that overlooked the sea of moving bodies down below.

Only a plane of glass separated you from the crowd below. It felt like a completely different club up here. There was another dance floor up here that was flanked by plush couches and tables with important looking people and their entrange sprinkled about.

The same music from downstairs was playing and people were dancing to it but you could carry on a conversation up here and not have to scream in someone's ear to hear them.

Off to the side of the room was an iron spiral staircase leading up into the unknown. The level above was devoid of light and you surmised shady business was handled therein. You hoped Florence's client wasn't waiting for everyone up there.

Thankfully an attractive man dressed in an all black suit approached your trio. "You girls with Florence?"

He eyed the group's outfits, lingering much longer on Morgana's dress and she definitely noticed.

"Yeah. Wanna show us the way?" She leaned forward so he could see the valley of cleavage she sported.

Barbara smacked her forehead at the flirtatious reply. Typical Morgana to flirt with a stranger. Maybe that's why her business was so successful?

He grinned and waved everyone over to a booth. The lights were dimmer on this floor, almost completely dark, so you had to squint to see Florence's feathery sleeves wrapped around someone at the table.

A guy sat in the middle with your friend practically in his lap with a blonde African female on his left, who smiled in greeting when the three of you showed up. Florence was still laughing at whatever that was said but stopped when she saw her friends.

"There y'all are! I told Y/n we were invited up to VIP like, thirty minutes ago!" Everyone stared at you with disappointment but your mind was elsewhere.

Flo paid it no mind and continued. "Barbara, Morgana, Y/n, I'd like you to meet my client...."

Neo.

He acknowledged the others before locking eyes with you. One subtle shake of his head told you everything. Florence didn't know she was sitting on one of Joker's henchmen's lap. It felt like someone shoved your head underwater. Joker was here; Neo's smug grin confirmed it.

You didn't hallucinate your stolen orgasm downstairs. Joker traveled over nine hundred miles just to mess with you. You didn't know whether to be concerned or flattered.

".. and that's Iris. She's his assistant. Which means she's the secret assassin bodyguard. Ooh! Y/n you should interview her for inspiration for one of your books!"

Florence was just babbling at this point. Iris stood to give Morgana her seat but not before whispering in Neo's ear. Both of them glanced at you and she walked off with a knowing smile. Barbara noticed the exchange but without any context she couldn't pry.

She parked her wheelchair in front of the table and struck up a conversation with Neo that Morgana soon joined. It was time she got some answers. Which left you sliding into the booth next to Florence who quickly slung her arm around your shoulders.

The beautician was intoxicated at this point although she was nowhere near her goal of being drunkity drunk. Whatever that meant. You refused to carry her tonight if that was her goal.

"B__ch ain't he fine? Like tall, dark and handsome, reeking of BDE, fine? I might stay the night and get some of that Georgia peach's dick."

You didn't have the heart to tell Florence that Neo lived in Gotham City but nodded along regardless. Flo thought she whispered this to you but judging by Barbara stuttering mid sentence, unfortunately it was said too loud.

The redhead eyed the two of you with a mother-like glare. Strike one. She resumed her discussion with Neo like nothing happened. He paused to wink at Florence. Only Barb would talk business and acquisitions in a club with the owner. Morgana was no better; she was serious when asking Neo what the margins were like for running Euphoria.

And you were the sober one.

You sighed before responding. "Y-Yeah.. sure he's hot and you did an amazing job with his braids, might I add. You are dressed to get laid so.." You gestured at her see through attire as if held the answer.

She laughed, "True, true. And I did go crazy on his hair design." A waiter walked by and she flagged him down to order a drink. "Can I–"

"Hold on Mama, you're with me." Neo stopped Florence from ordering and locked eyes with the waiter. "Bottle service. Top shelf my man."

He kissed Florence's cheek and she melted in her seat. "That aight with y'all?" Neo asked the table. Everyone was in agreement until Florence scoffed. "Y/n doesn't drink!"

You and Barbara just sighed. Did she forget you drank with her and the girls downstairs?

Neo's light brown eyes flickered over to you. And so the staring match began. You and Neo weren't on good terms. Not since he waved a gun in your face outside of Luigi's pizza.

You tolerated Frost the most out of Joker's trusted three and that said something. His driving skills still horrified you. Neo reeked of arrogance. You weren't a fan.

"Is that so? I can order you some juice... water. Some warm milk?"

Morgana snorted at the joke. "That's not necessary. She drank a (insert fav drink) just a while ago. Florence just can't remember cuz she's too drunk. Isn't that right, Y/n/n?"

"Y/n/n?" Neo repeated sarcastically.

Barbara noticed your annoyed eye roll and elaborated. "It's an inside joke between us four. She hates it although it suits her well." She then launched into the story behind your nickname with Morgana adding funny details along the way.

Neo nodded along, learning more about you. In between the story, the waiter returned with two chilled bottles sitting in a bucket of ice with five champagne glasses, the extra one holding lit sparklers. Your order was placed during the grand spectacle.

Other tables looked over at the lively service in intrigue. Neo popped the bottles open and dutifully filled three glasses for your friends before pouring his own. Cheers were being made but someone tapped your shoulder and stole your attention. You were about to thank the waiter for bringing your drink when you locked eyes with green.

Joker was bold. He looked like an average employee, holding a serving tray. "Your drink, miss."

Your eyes flickered to his lips stressing the syllables only to find that he wasn't wearing a mask. You were flabbergasted. It was dark but not enough for him to walk around so exposed!

"Y/n, do you know him or something? He look familiar." You wiped your head around to face Florence.

She sipped on her flute of champagne eyeing Joker pensively.

Neo was too busy staring at her body but he glanced at his boss in shock after hearing her words. Florence was getting too curious about Joker and soon, so would Barbara and Morgana. He was cloaked in darkness but that would only do so much against a native Gothamite. If anyone could identify a wanted criminal it was a suspicious black woman.

Joker narrowed his eyes at Neo. It issued a silent order, one that Neo quickly translated, since he moved to distract his date faster than the Flash on crack.

"Florence baby, you wanna dance a bit?" He suggested.

She readily agreed and off they went to the dancefloor. Crisis avoided. Thank goodness she was drunk. You exhaled but remembered you weren't alone.

At the same time that Florence got curious, Morgana had caught the eye of a man from a different table and proceeded to flirt over the rim of her champagne glass. Barbara was preoccupied with texting on her phone.

You would bet twenty dollars she was texting Grayson. That or she was using her phone as a mobile access point to her PC back in Gotham. Either way, no one was paying attention to you and Joker took advantage of that.

He set your drink on the glass table and whispered in your ear while doing so. "Go up the spiral stairs in five minutes. Second door and, uh, don't keep me waiting."

With that said, he was gone, blending in with the club's shadows.

Play it off Y/n. Don't make it too obvious. You told yourself.

You nursed your drink and scanned the room in fake interest while counting down the minutes. More people were on the dance floor and the vibe was slowly matching the one on the floor below. Morgana left the table to talk directly to her crush and Barbara was nodding her head to the music, practicing glued to her phone.

The low glow from it highlighted her amused grin. She was definitely texting Dick.

"Hey.. uh. I'll be right back." You said in her direction.

"Yeah sure." She didn't spare you a glance and you didn't waste any time making your escape. 

You grabbed your clutch and dipped. It felt like the entire floor was watching you rush up the stairs yet you made it there with no issues. True to his word, there was a hallway up here lined with doors. Joker mentioned the second, so you approached it cautiously.

The inside was dark but you could tell it was a finance office of sorts. An ornate desk sat in the center and you walked up to it. The surface was cool to the touch and dust free.

The door clicking shut behind you made you drop your clutch on the floor. Before you could panic, warm hands held you close. You knew these arms.

"Joker! What— seriously you gotta stop scaring me! And have you lost your mind?"

He turned you around to face him and looked up at the ceiling, thinking it over. "Yes."

You frowned. "That's not what I meant. Did you really follow me to Atlanta? What if someone sees—"

He cut you off with a kiss. It quickly turned heated and you soon lost track of what you were upset about. His hands roamed your body in reverence and made you dizzy.

"You didn't get to.. ahh cum downstairs. Are ya up for it now?" He asked while licking your pulse.

How could you forget? You thought you imagined it since it happened so abruptly. "Seriously? Now?" 

He seared a yes on your skin and tried pushing your dress up but your hands stopped him halfway. He groaned in defeat and rocked his hips into yours instead.

You were shocked by his sense of urgency. "Joker, quit it! Someone will hear us!"

"Hear what? Hmm? The sounds of you screaming my name or.. the musiC?" Right as he said that, someone turned up the volume.

The crowd shouted their thanks and you had no further excuses to use. His words made your face hot. Just how much control did he have here?

"Dress. Off." Joker ordered. Apparently more than what you were expecting.

"But—"

The clicking sound of a switchblade echoed in the room. "Or I'll cut it off. Looks expensive too." Joker licked his scars eyeing your designer dress.

You knew Joker wasn't one for empty threats. You pouted and turned around to present your zipper to him. His deep hum of approval caused more slick to run down your thigh and you rubbed them together hoping he wouldn't notice.

"Sooo.. needy."

Of course he noticed. Nothing got past Joker.

The sharp sting of the blade nicking your skin was your only warning before he cut your dress off. You hunched forward clutching the ruined fabric to your chest in shock.

"Joker!"

"Ahttt aht ttt. I said take it off, not show me your a** no matter how sexy it is. No bra either? Tsk tsk." He smacked your behind causing you to yelp.

Suddenly Joker was hot and heavy against your back.

"You gonna be my good girl, Y/n? There's still time to.." He reached around and cupped your pussy. "Well. Someone is sopping wet. Does this excite you Bunny?" He circled his thumb on your clit.

He already knew the answer. Joker didn't bother locking the door and anyone could walk in and see your body giving in to his control over it.

You were panting and struggling to keep yourself upright. Your nipples had already hardened to stiff peaks and you were a mess even though Joker had yet to do anything serious.

He was right though. The fear, the overall excitement of being caught, had you wetter than you've ever been. The pleasure he created made you lightheaded and the sensation spurred you on.

"I wanna be your good girl." You gasped. He repeated your sentiment right back into your ear, mocking you for no reason only because he could.

"Yeah? You do? Well good girls don't leave the house without panties or a bra. Goood girls aren't uh.. greedy sluts in public." He slipped a finger inside your pussy, growling at the lack of resistance. "They saw you chasing that high doll. Out on the dance floor. You were so close.. They wanted you to let go. To feel that high. That. Rush. I want you to let go. Right. Now. Can you? For meee? Let go, c'mon on. Do iT."

Joker pumped his fingers faster into you as he talked you through it. His unique voice guiding you was the perfect accelerant to throw you over the edge.

He was notorious for his grand speeches. The way he carefully articulated his words and captivated an audience was riveting. Too bad your head was so far in the clouds you barely understood a single word. A string of yes's tumbled from your lips as you came on Joker's fingers.

His right hand rested atop yours on the desk to prevent your nails from clawing into its wood finish.

The pleasure washed over you leaving your ears ringing. You tried to regulate your breathing but it was all too much.

The music playing in the other room was just buzzing noise in your ear. You weren't a good girl. Even after coming you ached for more. You wanted Joker and he knew your body better than yourself.

"Shhhh shhh. I know. It's never enough." You whimpered as he turned you around to prop you up on the desk.

His hands came up to cradle your head as he devoured your lips. Joker always made you feel small in his arms. And when you parted lips and gazed into juniper eyes, you knew he wanted you to completely submit to him.

Giving that much of yourself was like a drug to him. Joker looked high off the idea alone. When he backed away you reached out for him.

He said nothing as he rounded the desk and sat down in the big executive chair. You looked over your shoulder at him, a question already forming on your tongue. With a lone finger he ordered you to come closer.

The desk was oddly bare but it worked in your favor for what you were about to do.

It was awkward at first since you still wore your heels and nothing else, but you slowly crawled over the desk to face Joker. He looked every bit the Prince of Crime seated on his throne. All that was missing was his—

"Sit on my lap Princess."

The gap between the table and his lap was scary but Joker was right there to catch you.

There was power alluding from his body as you sat completely bare on his clothed lap. You ran your hands against the dark fabric of his chest.

He was wearing a suit but not his signature one. This one was designer and oozing with dominance. Another perfect disguise for him to do what he wanted. It made you squirm in anticipation. You went about unbuttoning the black dress shirt but faced backlash.

"Did I tell you to undress me?" He asked. You shook your head. "Then don'T."

Joker's hands slid up and down your back mapping out your dips and curves while kneading your backside. You braced for the sting that never came. Instead he struck you elsewhere.

His teeth sank into your neck and you keened sharply.

He let go with a wet pop. "Too much? Orrr? Not enough?"

You fisted his shirt and choked out a sob. Joker eyed you hungrily and reached over to flick the table lamp on to see you fully. The area was bathed in warm gold and Joker finally got to see his long awaited treat.

"Look... at you Bunny." His thumb swiped at the stubborn red adorning your lips. Something about you completely nude with his shade of red on, sent him into a state.

You didn't know what had gotten into Joker but he declared no more words were needed and quickly unzipped his fly to free himself.

He didn't bother removing his pants all the way; they were hastily shoved to his knees before he hovered you above his aching cock. Harsh pants were shared in the small space between your lips and Joker's. He interpreted your gentle nod as permission to continue.

Your eyes locked with his lust blown green and your jaw slackened as the slow stretch stole your breath away.

"Oh my god."

"That ain't my name bunny but mmm. Close enough." He pushed you down until you were flush with his hips. You cried out at the fullness. Joker wrapped his arms around you when he felt you shivering.

He wasn't any better. It made no sense how tight you were. He tipped his head back laughing to keep from whining like some virgin schoolboy. It took all of his willpower not to ravish your body for his own pleasure. Instead, Joker rocked your hips back and forth, churning his dick in your insides as payback for making him feel so weak.

Your voice got caught in your throat after a rough buck of his hips. "Jo—ker!"

"That'ssss it. That's my name." Joker buried his head on your shoulder, biting down on it to stifle his moan.

What soon followed was straight out of a fever dream.

If anyone dared to venture up the spiral staircase the distinctive sound of sex would greet them. You let each and every pornographic moan rip from your throat in the throes of ecstasy.

Joker didn't hold back his strength and slammed you down on his cock and teased you in between his own heavy pants. He praised you for being so tight, scolded you for being a greedy slut, and for always running away, don't ever run from him was pounded deep into your pussy.

He laughed at you when your eyes rolled back into your skull and slapped your face to force your eyes back on him in the same millisecond. Your eye makeup was ruined but Joker's line of sight was trained on your pristine red lips moving a mile a minute.

You didn't know what you were saying. "P-Please please oh hmph.. Please!"

It was just mindless nonsense in the wave of pleasure consuming your senses. Yet Joker was always attentive.

"Whatcha begging for, Bunny? Breathe n' tell meee." He growled and grabbed a handful of your hair.

The sharp pain had you staring at him with watery eyes and a pouty lip. Joker never seen a more prettier sight.

You didn't know what you wanted. It was all too much for his pathetic bunny. Joker's grin was horrifying in the limited light in the room yet it was the most beautiful sight to you. Your eyes watered up even more.

"Shush shush Y/n. You ahh.. you knooow.. I hate it. I hate when you cry. Mhm. It. Drives. Me. Crazy."

Each word was pounded into you as Joker finally snapped.

He secured a bruising grip on your hips and rose to his feet. You felt weightless for a spell until the cool surface of the desk hit your back. You arched away from it but Joker's sweltering body forced you back down. There was nowhere to go and Joker's shoulders were your only anchor to Earth. All you had to do was keep your legs pulled back and accept the brutal f__k Joker subjected you to.

He groaned uncontrollably and picked up the pace.

You were uncertain if it was the new angle or simply the level of intensity Joker pounded your pussy with but the moment he shifted and started bullying your g spot, you were done. He knew you were close by the strength you used to push at his shoulders.

Always running away... but not this time.

"Aww right there? C'mon doll, give it to me, give it to me." Joker mumbled under his breath. He held your head still and grinned down at your pain stricken face each delicious time the tip of his dick hit your sweet spot. "You can do iT.."

Your lips, stained his signature red, opened in a silent scream as the final cusp of pleasure tipped you over into the nether.

Joker hissed at the death grip your pussy had on his dick. He managed to fight through it although he was seconds from coming undone too. He didn't know why he kept talking; you wouldn't understand a thing. It was mostly done to chase his own high.

"Your pussy is gonna take everything I give her, mkay? T-Take everything I give you Bunny." Maybe it was best that you couldn't hear.

Joker was lost in pleasure, he sounded so unlike himself in that moment.

The things you did to him. He'd endure the feeling of being pulled apart one piece at a time, only to be forcefully slammed back together again any day with you. He grabbed the edge of the desk and let the last few thrusts into your worn pussy echo loudly in the room.

Only then was it quiet.

It took a while for Joker to get his bearings straight. Every time he had sex with you it got better than before.

You were turning him into a drug addict with you being the most refined drug to grace the Earth. Joker relocated you back into his lap and sat back down in the office chair. You were sound asleep, cuddled up to his dress shirt and shivering from the cold, not arousal.

He drew a breath and raked a hand through his hair, thinking of how to get you out of here without any clothes.

Cutting your dress seemed hot in the heat of the moment but now he eyed the ruined fabric on the floor with a grimace. He refused to let anyone see you in such a state and yet he couldn't resist destroying any and all barriers between him and your body during sex.

Your beauty was for Joker's eyes only, yet there was an entire two floor's worth of people separating you from the exit. He was forming a plan in his head when a series of beeps rang from your phone.

Oddly enough your clutch, and subsequently, your phone survived the fall to the floor and landed near the desk. Joker didn't have to reach far to grab it.

He didn't know your passcode yet but thankfully you enabled messages to be visible from the lock screen. There were a slew of other notifications mixed in with a few missed calls.

The most recent notification were concerned texts from your friends.

If Joker remembered correctly Florence was the girl you danced with earlier. She was very outspoken and... confident. Her sheer covering, (Joker refused to call it a dress) was eye-catching, but she wasn't his type.

Joker liked you and only you. Awkward and skittish Y/n. He grumbled at his soft thoughts and read your text messages.

'B__h wtf?' Sent from Florence.

Exactly two minutes later Barbara, the Commissioner's daughter, Joker said sarcastically to himself, sent a message.

'where r u hello? Y/n/n seriously you said you'd be right back'

Morgana chimed in instantly. '$100 she's getting some!'

Joker smirked at that. She wasn't wrong and he liked bets but he continued to read. He watched as the funny check-ins turned into serious concern. They already searched the first floor and came up empty and the most recent message from your friend Flo read as follows.

'this isn't funny Y/n I asked Neo to look for you

Joker sighed. It was posted seven minutes ago which meant his henchmen was making his way up here soon.

Joker glanced at the time on your cell before settling his eyes on you tuckered out on his chest. You'd hate him later for it but his thumbs were already holding down the blue bubble and typing out a response.

Y/n: 😏👌🏾👉🏾🍆

Immediately three messages popped up simultaneously. He read them in order, Florence being the first.

'whore! Lead with that next time ugh I swear!

Your florist friend was next with her priorities in order.

'Run me my money!! Cashapp me'

Barbara seemed to be the most responsible of the group. Her strict upbringing no doubt at play.

'Ok seriously don't scare us like that Y/n. Morgana is flying back with me. Flo, can you make sure Y/n gets back to Gotham safely? The club is closing in the nxt hour'

Euphoria's public hours were nine pm to three in the morning. But those hours didn't phase Joker when he was the owner. Neo just ran things legally.

Although the base of operations was in Gotham City, Joker took pride in being a national threat. In every major city, he had a sector with enough influence to be respected but not as large as his reputation in Gotham. He took great pride in being feared across the country. A new message chimed in and his eyes flickered down to read it.

'uh uh get someone else to do it, I gotta get mines 🤪🍆'

He liked this Florence gal. He knew any sensible man wouldn't leave her company and that meant Neo wouldn't come sniffing around where he didn't belong.

The noise level had greatly diminished as the closing hour approached. Joker decided to wait until the club closed to the public before searching for some clothes for you.

You mumbled something in your sleep and he took pity on the goosebumps rising on your dark skin. He wasn't getting soft. Honestly he wasn't.

His discarded suit jacket would have to do for the next forty five minutes to keep you warm. It practically swallowed your frame with how small you were.

Joker brushed a curl away so he could see your face better. You were curled up in his arms with his red lipstick highlighting the small smile on your face even as you slept.  

[skellebonez]

Cotton Tails and Borrowed Time: Aftermath and Remix... and Some Stuff Between. Chapter 4

For Now and For Forever.

This can technically take place before the last chapter, but I had to save this for today. Happy Pride ya'll! Also, sorry for the long delay in fic uploads/updates. I was in a car accident and had a concussion/wrist bone contusion and couldn't really write anything for like a month. But I'm ok now!

AO3 Link!

"Tang, wake up," Pigsy said softly. He couldn't believe he was doing this, but... He had made all these plans. He needed to follow through. "I have something for ya."

Tang yawned and stretched, blinking open his eyes. A slow, lazy smile spread across his face at the sight of the silver tray with the dome lid that sat on the bed between them.

"What's all this?" He asked. "And... it's almost lunch? Did you let me sleep in?"

"I, um..." Pigsy faltered, rubbing the back of his neck with a nervous chuckle as he slowly lifted the lid. "I have a surprise for you."

"Strawberries!" Tang exclaimed. Under the tray was delicious treat and fruit juice that Pigsy took extra time to prepare himself. "White chocolate strawberries! How did we not think of that!? This isn't exactly breakfast food, but... I'm not gonna complain!"

"I thought you'd appreciate that," Pigsy said with a fond chuckle. "They're all yours, honey bun. I kinda helped myself to some of the fruit as I made all this already."

"Really?" Tang asked, eyes wide in awe as his leg thumped in excitement under the blanket.

"Really," Pigsy said with a nod. "Except this one."

With a chuckle he reached out, snatching one of the smaller ones and popping it into his mouth. The fake offended "THIEF" Tang whisper shouted was worth it, as was the chuckle they shared and the delicious sweet-tartness of the treat he had made up for his... boyfriend?

Boyfriend didn't feel right any more. Not strong enough for the bond they shared. That was at least half the reason he decided to do this. It felt like it was time to take the next step. They had to.

Tang ate happily, listening to Pigsy explain that the shop was closed for the day and that he planned a special day for just the two of them.

"You're hiding something," Tang said plainly as he licked the strawberry juice off his mouth fur.

"Am I that obvious?" Pigsy asked with a chuckle. He might have been more flustered or upset that Tang caught on if he hadn't gotten so used to the scholar picking up on things so quickly (and if he didn't find it both endearing and less anxiety inducing to know he was noticing things). "Got any guesses?"

"Nope," Tang said with a chuckle. "Something tells me this would be better if it was a surprise. Let's see what you have in store for me today."

Pigsy breathed a quiet sigh of relief, settling onto the bed beside Tang. His love for the bunny demon was overwhelming at that moment, banishing... MOST of his remaining fears and doubts. Not all of them. But enough to make him feel that, maybe, today was going to be perfect after all. At least... he hoped it would be.

It took almost no time for the two of them to get ready, Pigsy having informed Tang it would be dressed for an outdoor day.

He looked... so handsome to Pigsy. It wasn't every day that Tang wore something shorter than his usual longer top, opting for a similar outfit that had something he could tuck into his pants instead, but the few times Pigsy saw him in this outfit he couldn't help but find it made him look amazing.

"If you're gonna stare," Tang said with a smirk. "You should probably take a picture."

"S-shush," Pigsy eventually stammered out, averting his gaze with a flush. "And uh... bend down a bit? No peaking."

Tang looked at him with a raised brow, a bemused smile on his face as he did so. The smile faltered for a moment as Pigsy pulled a piece of cloth out of his pocket before slowly, carefully, blindfolding the rabbit.

"Is this really necessary?" Tang asked, the first bit of uncertainty Pigsy has heard from him that morning. But he didn't stop the chef, patiently waiting for him to finish.

"No, but it's part of the surprise. Remember, no peaking!" Pigsy said as he tightened the blindfold. "And hold on."

"Hold on to wh-AH!"

Pigsy closed his eyes, holding onto Tang's hands as the feeling of the magic surrounding them almost pulled him down into the shadows. Then thrust them upwards, more gently than he had expected actually. When he opened them again, they were no longer in the bedroom.

"Hmnn... sounds like... were on Mount Huaguo," Tang said after a small gasp with wide smile. "On the beach! But the smell gave that away first."

"Knew having Macaque teleport us wouldn't stop you from figuring that much out," Pigsy said with a chuckle. "I owe him for that... Keep that blindfold on though. We're still heading a bit farther."

Tang huffed in amusement but didn't protest, allowing Pigsy to guide him along the  slightly rocky path. Though, to be fair, Tang didn't need nearly as much help as he used to. His new rabbit paws made traversing the outdoors second nature to the bunny demon, the fur protecting him from any sharper corners he may inadvertently step on. His ears twitched and swiveled, as much as they could in their lop state, no doubt picking up all the sounds of the wildlife around them.

After a few minutes of walking, Pigsy said, "We're here. You can look now."

Tang pulled off the blindfold, blinking at the sight before him. A picnic blanket was laid out on the ground, laden with all of Tang's favorite foods. All of Tang's NEW favorite foods, he should clarify. They were very particular about making sure they knew exactly what foods his new hybrid rabbit stomach could handle.

"Red Son and Sandy helped me set this up before they left," Pigsy explained, rubbing the back of his neck. "I saw them leaving on the other path once they spotted us. I wanted today to be perfect for you."

Tang turned to him, eyes soft. He cupped Pigsy's cheek, bending down to meet his other cheek in a gentle kiss. "Every day with you is perfect, PIgsy. You didn't have to do all this."

Pigsy's cheeks flushed as he ducked his head, embarrassed but pleased. Tang always knew exactly what to say to set his heart at ease.

"I know but...you deserve the world, Tang," he said. "And I want to give it to you."

Tang smiled, bumping their noses together.

"You've already given me everything I could ever want."

Pigsy's heart swelled, almost feeling as if it might just explode with love for the demon in his arms. Today was turning out even better than he'd imagined.

They settled in to enjoy the picnic, chatting and laughing as the sun slowly rose and began it's descent towards the other side of the horizon. They talked about everything and nothing at all, almost feeling like they had too much time to catch up on and not enough time to talk about because they'd been inseparable this past year. A comfortable silence fell between them in time, the only sounds the chirping of crickets and the rustle of leaves in the breeze.

Tang eventually leaned back on his hands, gazing out at the scenic view.

"I'd forgotten how beautiful it is up here. We haven't had a chance to come in so long." He sighed, shoulders drooping. "Things have been so busy lately. Feels like we haven't had a moment to ourselves in... ages! I missed this."

"Missed what?" Pigsy asked at the sudden interjection.

"Us just... taking things slow," Tang answered with a chuckle. "After everything with Lady Bone Demon and then my transformation and then my rehabilitation and all the Monkie Kid stuff MK has to deal with? It's been a while since we just had a full day to each other properly. It's been almost three months since the last proper date we had."

Pigsy had been so busy planning this and dealing with the aftermath of the latest world ending disaster that actually wasn't that he hadn't noticed.

"Aw, Tang, I'm... I'm sorry."

"Don't be!" Tang countered with a laugh. "Things happen sometimes. I don't expect our lives to be a whirlwind romance every week. But today? More then eclipses the last 3 months entirely."

Pigsy scooted closer, wrapping an arm around Tang's shoulders.

"I know what you mean. I miss this too—just the two of us, no responsibilities, no deadlines to worry about. We've been neglecting ourselves."

"Mmm," Tang hummed in agreement, nestling into Pigsy's side. "Promise we won't leave it so long before our next date, ok?"

"Never," Pigsy vowed, pressing a kiss to Tang's temple. "You're stuck with me, Tang."

"Good," Tang said with a chuckle.

"But, uh, don't make yourself too comfy," Pigsy said with a shrug to dislodge the bunny from his side. He stood, walking over to a nearby bush. "We're not done yet."

"You mean there's MORE?" Tang asked in surprise. "We’ve already had breakfast in bed, strawberries, a blindfolded walk to lunch. What else do you have planned?"

"Oh, you'll see," Pigsy said with a slightly nervous chuckle. He tried not to notice the weight in his pocket as he pulled out two hiking backpacks. "We've still got a long walk to our next destination though."

"A romantic hike through the woods of Mount Huaguo dooooes sound nice," Tang admitted with a smile.

~

A hike was putting it mildly. Pigsy wished that Sun Wukong had warned them that it would be as intense as it was, but... well, perhaps he was to blame. This WAS a mountain.

But despite his misgivings about the difficulty of the terrain, he wouldn't change it for the world. Not when he could see Tang having so much fun.

He wasn't sure when the last time he saw the bunny demon looking so care free and natural was. He ran across logs, jumped over rocks on the rivers they crossed, chased at least one butterfly. By all accounts he was having the time of his life.

It took them hours to get to where they were. But that was the point. A day to hike and take in everything. They were in no rush, they could stop for a snack or a drink at any time. They could stop so Tang could pull out one of his notebooks and draw any of the wildlife they saw, pick a flower and press it to take home.

They talked and walked in mutual silence in equal measure. It felt... amazing.

Pigsy felt amazing.

He felt more amazing when they reached their destination just 15 minutes before sundown, running a little later than he expected but also still making it there in time. Sun Wukong really did know all the best spots on the mountain. On this side you couldn't see the city at all, and with the wind blowing in their direction the sky was clear before them. They could see the island beneath them and the vast sea laid out around them, so high that they couldn't even see the beach anymore.

And as Tang helped him lay out a blanket on the side of a hill, as well as their much more modest dinner from Pigsy's hiking bag, he started to feel nervous.

The day was almost gone, he thought to himself as they ate their fruit and sandwiches. As Tang once again leaned against him, both reclined on the hill as they watched the sun slowly setting.

Tang smiled, relaxed and care free, and together they watched it finally dip below the horizon and bathe the sky in vivid oranges and reds. A deep contentment settled in Pigsy's chest, holding Tang close as the stars began to emerge in the darkening sky. They had all the time in the world, and for now, that was enough.

Pigsy watched Tang as he took in the breeze, letting it flow through his fur. Watched as the last rays of the setting sun shove off his brown fur, giving him an almost amber glow. Watched as the other closed his eyes and started to grind his teeth in contentment.

It was almost time.

He could do this. He could last just a bit longer.

It was after the first few starts started to look down at them that Tang next spoke.

"What's wrong, Pigsy?" Tang asked suddenly.

"What?" PIgsy asked, staring at the other. "Wh-what makes you think something's wrong?"

"Pigsy, I'm not stupid," Tang said softly, but also bluntly. "I can tell something has been on your mind all day. What's wrong?"

"Nothing!" Pigsy said quickly. Too quickly. "That-that's kinda the problem... Everything always goes wrong! Eventually! When is something going to snap, a demon going to attack, MK call us to say the shop is on fire!?"

"The shop isn't going to be on fire-"

"You don't know!" PIgsy said, taking a deep breath. "Sorry... sorry, I just... my nerves are getting to me because there's something I've been meaning to ask you..."

"What-"

"What do you think of MK?" Pigsy asked quickly, rushing the question out before he lost his nerve. "Like, how do you see him?"

"Huh?" Tang asked, looking at him in confusion. "Pigsy, you know how I feel about MK."

"I know, but... but I wanna hear it again!"

This was stupid... this was stupid, he was stupid and Tang probably hated him for asking such a stupid question and-

"He's practically my son too," Tang said softly. "I wasn't posturing or making things up or using him to make myself feel cooler when I told Spider Queen I was a father figure to him. That's how I felt."

Pigsy felt like he's been hit in the chest with a sledgehammer, but not in a bad way, somehow. His stomach almost filled with butterflies, his head felt light at the words of the other.

He couldn't psych himself out now.

"OK... OK, ok, uh..." Pigsy cleared his throat, heart pounding. It was now or never. "Tang, there's something else I've been meaning to ask you."

Tang glanced up at him, brows furrowing slightly in concern. "What is it?"

"I know it hasn't been easy, with your transformation and all the changes in our lives recently," Pigsy began, choosing his words carefully. "But you and MK are the best things that have ever happened to me. You've made me happier than I ever thought I could be, and I don't want to imagine my life without you in it."

He took a deep breath, steeling his nerves as he pulled the small box out of his pocket and opened it and climbed to one knee.

"Tang, will you marry me?"

~

Pigsy peered into the glass case, eyeing a simple silver band inlaid with tiny rubies that matched Tang's favorite color. At least, he hoped they did. They were the same color at his outfit that he wore everyday... His heart raced. Was it too much? Was it not enough?

Mei nudged his arm, smirking at him. "It's perfect. He's gonna to love it!"

"Do you think it's too much?" Pigsy asked, hands fidgeting with the credit card they held. "Too little? This ain't gonna scare him off, is it?"

"I don't think there IS a way for you to scare him off, " Mei said with a shrug. "Not with this, anyway. If anything, he's going to be even clingier."

"And you're sure MK doesn't... you know, have any reason to object to this?" Pigsy continued. "Maybe I should ask him if he's ready for this kind of change."

"I think he was ready the day he called Tang 'hop pop', Piggy."

Pigsy took a deep breath, steadying his nerves. Mei was right. He knew in his heart that Tang and MK were his family, and they deserved to make this official. MK deserved to have his two dads, like he had been hinting at for ages... if you could call calling both of them his dads hinting.

"OK... Excuse me, sir?" He called out, clearing his throat when his voice cracked a little under the nerves of the moment. "How much is this one?

~

There was a moment of stunned silence. Then Tang surged forward, throwing his arms around Pigsy in an ecstatic embrace (nearly knocking the box out of his grasp before he set it aside).

"Yes, yes of course I'll marry you!" he exclaimed, voice muffled where his face was pressed into Pigsy's chest.

Pigsy's heart soared, and he spun Tang around with a shout of joy, hugging him close. When he finally puled back, it was to find Tang's face streaming with tears as he continued to smile wide. Pigsy brushed them away with his thumbs, cupping Tang's face in his hands.

"I love you so much," he whispered, gazing deep into Tang's eyes. "You and MK are my world, and I want to spend the rest of my life proving that to you."

"You already have," Tang assured him, smile soft and radiant as the sunrise. "The moment you kissed me back when I confessed. I love you too, Pigsy, with all my heart."

Pigsy kissed him then, slow and sweet, pouring all the love and devotion in his soul into that one perfect moment. He and Tang were going to be together, forever, and this was only the beginning of a new journey for the two of them.

Pigsy drew back reluctantly, aware they still to breathe. But he kept one hand encased in Tang's unwilling to let him go completely.

"We should head back," he said with a sigh. "MK will be wondering where we've gotten to. I'm pretty sure we're going to be home later than I told him."

Tang nodded, though he looked just as loath to end their moment.

"You're right. And we have so much to plan!" His whole face lit up again at the thought. "A wedding to organize! We need flowers, food, a venue, oh my gosh we have so much! We're going to need a lot of help!"

"I think we can figure that all out together," Pigsy said with the easiest smile he had mustered all day.

Tang's smile brightened, if that was even possible, soft and radiant as the starlight above them.

"That's all I've ever wanted."

"Then it's decided," Pigsy said as he squeezed his hands, blinking back a fresh swell of tears. "From now on, we face every challenge together. Just like we always have. But, you know, more official!"

"Together," Tang echoed firmly. He stood on his toes to steal one last lingering kiss. "Now, let's go tell our son the good news!"

Pigsy's heart swelled with joy at the words our son. He had a full official family at long last. Hand in hand, they made their way back through the fading sunset, ready to embark on a new chapter of their lives.

Together.

[hernakedmuse]

Amberline

Part III

DISCLAIMER: NOT PROOFREAD.

Warnings: Orgasms by kissing.

----------------------------------------------☆☆☆

I told Gretchen that I didn't feel well and was heading straight home, my mom was going to pick me up.

But my mom wouldn't pick me up; she'd make me take the bus anyway, but Gretchen didn't have to know that.

I followed the instructions on Kyle's literary note. I was half worried it was just a prank, and his friends were waiting for me, so they could all laugh at the witch.

But Kyle was there, with no friends. He sat on top of the trunk of his car with a book in his hand about communism. He looked up with his usual fallen curl in his face, his sleepy bedroom eyes widened a little before returning to its normal state. A half smile curled part of his lip and he closed his book slowly as his gaze caressed my appearance.

"Why do you do that?" I asked as I readjusted the strap of my backpack on my shoulder. I wish I kept my hair up, but I let it fall to my waist, for Kyle, just like I freshened up in the bathroom with my love spell body mist for him.

"Do what?" He asked calmly.

"Stare at me." I said in a whisper.

He smiled, eyes lowered to my chest. "I pride myself in controlling impulses, desires, and such….but…" he didn't finish. "You read during lunch, let's get something to eat." He hopped off of his car and opened the passenger door for me. I got in without question and he went to his side.

We were next to each other now, side by side only the console between us and my heart pulsed.

He started driving and he put the radio on, the local rock station. They were playing Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls. The song is so intimate I felt embarrassed beside Kyle who I was already growing feelings for.

We didn't talk the entire car ride to the mall, and to be honest…I didn't hate it. The song embarrassed me at first but the silence between us became comfortable, and then we both mumbled along to the song bobbing our heads.

It was the most relaxing car ride I have ever been on. I was almost sad when we arrived at the Arden fair, your typical huge American mall. He actually did something very un high school and opened my door. Not only that, but he placed his hands on my waist to briefly help me down from the SUV.

"I used to hang out here all the time with my old friends. " I don't know why I just blurted that out, perhaps because I get too comfortable too easily.

"Why are they old?"

Instead of answering his question, I took his hand and ran to the food court. "Hurry up, I only ate a shitty pop tart today!"

I heard him laugh and it sounded like what I'd imagine gold to sound like.

I panted when we stopped in the middle of the food court.

"You're so tiny."

I was caught off guard by his random remark. "Huh?"

"You're so tiny your entire hand could barely hold my wrist. " but he didn't say it in a mocking way, he actually sounded intrigued.

I felt self conscious being so short. "So?"

But he just smiled, something I have yet to see him do, until now. "What are we eating?"

I smiled. "A&W. I would die for a burger right now."

"You shouldn't have to die for anything."

I was going to ask him what he meant by that when he already began to order, and gave me no chance to pay for it. Setting his cash down quicker than lightning

"Gretchen said you don't participate in the economy. " I said with a suspicious gaze.

He shrugged and took the food leading me to our table. "You're hungry, it's no big deal. Eat scream queen."

I smiled and bit back a laugh before biting into the greasy perfection. Kyle watched me and I felt self conscious about my eating.

I stopped and put down my burger before wiping my lips. Kyle takes a fry and puts it in his mouth before leaning in and connecting our mouths.

To say I was shocked was the understatement of the century. Our lips were connected, his surprisingly kinda soft. He didn't pull away until that fry was in my mouth.

When I finished the fry I was about to say something when a stunning girl with sun kissed skin, chamomile blonde hair and the kind of blue eyes that popped sashayed over to Kyle and plopped right down in his lap.

I didn't wait, I just got up heading toward the nearest store, a WB store. But before I could make it to the bronze Bugs Bunny, I felt someone yank me back against their chest, and I turned to see it was Kyle. I have no right to be upset, we just met and I'm well aware of his playboy status, but I'm the kind of girl who demands too much attention. Blame it on the lack of attention I get from my parents, being the only child, or this new toxic world of internet and reality TV but I attach myself to people easier than I care to admit.

And right now as I look up at Kyle Scheible's carelessly tousled hair and dark green eyes, I wanted to yell at him for getting me attached. Oh God, maybe I'm just like Sonia. But when I opened my mouth to tell him to leave me alone, he didn't let me.

He had me moving backwards, slammed me against the wall and lowered his forehead to mine. His eyes poured into mine, pupils dilated and his large hand moved down between my clothed breasts, the stomach I loathed and to the hem of my school skirt. He pushed it up and brushed his fingers beneath the waistband of my panties, the part that rested on my hip. I couldn't breathe and I know my eyes widened comically. Kyle lowered his face to my neck, and audibly inhaled. I gasped and his lips started kissing my neck, it felt so nice, it felt so fucking good I felt like I was alive for the first time in so long. It made me soaked because that spot was like an on button, and I grasped at his shirt as he sucked on my button and squeezed my naked hip. I felt teeth and hard sucking, my eyes rolled back and I felt a knot in my stomach as my thighs squirmed together as I whined pathetically. I didn't care that we were nestled away In a little alcove by the bathrooms, I could care less about the disgraced face of some woman who was mortified by a couple of Catholic kids going To first at the mall. Something big was happening to my body, a pressuring sensation with an addictive feeling. And like a wave it happened, I soaked my panties, I wet my underwear and I let out a horrified cry that I did that while Kyle was making out with my neck.

He kissed up to my ear and let out a breathy; "What's wrong?"

I wiped my eyes and gestured to my panties and the dripping spot on the mall floor, too embarrassed to even say it.

He looked down and did something I didn't expect, he moved his hand to my pussy, forcing a moan from me as he rubbed between my slit. "You pretty little thing, you orgasmed from just me giving you a hickey? Fuck youre perfect." He stole my mouth in a lewd, French kiss. It was wet and naughty and greedy, I didn't want him to stop. But he kept rubbing me and no one felt his thumb roll that little bud between my folds and I cried out in his mouth and he cried out I mine.

Orgasm, that's what I had. I knew what they were but until Kyle told me I had no idea how it felt. With a gasp we pulled our mouths apart when we couldn't breathe anymore, and when I looked down the wet patch on Kyle's khakis told me he orgasmed too.

@meetmyothersouls

[theplaypenparklogs]

LOG 1 - [Divorce Pop Tarts]

So frankly, I don’t recall much of it, but since you’ve asked, sure. But also, why would you even want to hear this? It’s been too long, for me and for you.

…

You still wanna?

…

Mkay.

…

So you remember when she used to hit us with those plastic hangers? The big fat ones? Compact and slightly heavy? Hurts like a bitch when you would accidentally fling it off into your face? Yeah, don’t remember? Yeah, thought so too, don’t worry, I also don’t, I just made that up.

Since all I remember is the pain, then I’ll be as dramatic as possible and also I hope you stop listening at some point and I can drop this retelling or whatever so we can get to other important stuff.

…

You still wanna?

…

Damn sure. Ok, so when she used to hit us, I wished super duper hard she would be quick yknow? Like, I don’t know about you, since you don’t remember much, but I knew, she would never completely stop, just sometimes it would last longer or sometimes, it was quick. So yeah, I usually hoped she would go at it quicker and then ignore us cuz it always hurt more when she dragged the hanger sessions on and off.

Yeah, anyways, so one day, I remember, she hit my head, it dragged out my hair and by some whatever bad luck, also dragged my body to hit the corner of the table. The mahogany table yknow? The super solid, clunky one, we hid under the table and all? You don’t remember?

…

You still wanna?

…

Yeah, so I was saying, old table, kinda stank. Like old people yeah? It was from our grandparents, grandparents, grandparents and so on it went, super ancient. Never asked how old it really was. Decrepit looking. Yeah. That table. Hit my head there, started bleeding, got all woozy and shit. Table was dark wood so It didn’t show much but still, it was the first time the pain actually registered as serious. It was also the last time.

It hurt.

Like a lot, I’m thankful you never got hurt as seriously as I did cuz I’m pretty sure I lost half of my braincells that day. Like the permanent vacation kinda lost. Yeah, so she saw the bleeding, and I like to think she thought she fucked up and all because she ran outta the room and called a number, which now that I think of it. Was probably our aunt, because no self-respecting people like her would actually call the emergency to treat the kid they were hitting.

She started whispering and i just sat there, near the table, kinda cloudy and all. Couldn’t think straight at all, at that time. But there was one clear thing I really wanted.

I didn’t wanna see her anymore and I didn’t wanna be hit by her anymore.

It hurt. It still hurts sometimes yknow?

So yeah, oh, and I also wanted pop tarts.

I really wanted it yeah.

And that’s all I can remember about that day. After, I remember, our aunt came to treat me, and she brought a box of pop tarts, so that was nice, cuz yknow, I really wanted some! I’m still surprised  though, she usually always brought that same flavour of pop tarts, I think it was called .

uhh, the blueberyy one, like, tasted kinda mediocre-ish? You don’t remember?

…

You still wanna?

…

Uhh, yeah, so she brough this time a different flavour, it was like, plain on top, but with white frosting in the center with some dark specks in it. I’m not too sure, maybe chocolate? Dunno. But yeah, that day, she brought a new flavour of pop tarts, bandaged my head and then left.

She was really nice. She’s still really nice, I should bring you to her one of these days, I don’t think we’ve met up with her often these past few years.

My bad, I keep going off onto other things, sorry.

So right, im sorry, it’s just the taste of those pop tarts, it was really good, I dont even know what it actually tasted like, but It was just so good. Delicious.

Uhrgh, sorry, sorry. Ok, yeah, so I ate those, and then during our cousins sleepover, we all finished the box. I was pretty sad about it not gonna lie. But it was enough for a few days since they couldn’t cook for us. I think they were really busy that time of the year, so no time for breakfast or lunch or anything.

So yeah, anyways, I wished for her to stop it and miraculously, after that day, she did! They got a divorce like you know. It went as well as it could and here we are, both housing with him.

You don’t remember?

…

You still wannaaa??

…

Then I don’t have much to say anymore. All I can remember is pop tarts, a really bad headache and lucky us divorce!

Yeah that’s it.

Ok, now, go to sleep. I know you won’t be studying tonight since I saw you buying that new game, the dating sim one, yeah, I know what you’re doing, ok, now, bye bye.

[luvfy0dor]

“Rise and Shine, Sweetheart ♡⁠˖” BSD x GN!Reader ੈ✩‧₊˚

╰┈➤ Osamu Dazai, Chuuya Nakahara, Fyodor Dostoevsky

warnings; probably a little ooc

description; morning routines with select BSD men

A/n; (edit a few days later I'm sorry I used a sigma and nikolai panel and didn't include them I was supposed 😭😭) I'm tired of these hoes omfg but anyways req break cause I think I've done 2 in a row now ^^ 3 more to go! Some of them are kinda harder to write out, but I'll give it my best, even if in the end I have to put them into short headcannons.

Dazai Osamu ★

Dazais morning routine consists of clinging onto your arm, trying to coax you back into a couple more blissful minutes in bed before you go off to work while he makes his decision on whether he's gonna go at all. Needless to say, you're the first one up, but he usually follows soon after, going to the bathroom to shower some mornings and emerging with wet hair and a towel wrapped around his waist while he rewraps his bandages. Sometimes he even asks for your help if you don't seem like you're running short on time, and he loves it when you assist him. He'll usually sit on the bed while you stand between his knees with the roll of cloth being passed back and forth between your left and right hands until you cover his arm. When he doesn't have you help him re-mumify himself, he'll find something for you to do for him. If he chooses to wear a tie, you're the one tying it. He likes when you hold his coat out for him to put on just so he can shrug it on and turn around to kiss you. His hand goes to cusp your cheek familiarly as he hums against your lips and lets his eyes flutter shut.

“Have a good day, y/n! I'll see you tonight, yeah? Don't take too long getting home, I was thinking we could do takeout and movie night! Maybe this time we'll even pay attention to the screen instead of each other the whole time, hehe.”

Chuuya Nakahara ★

Most mornings, Chuuya wakes up first. Sometimes he'll step onto the balcony to smoke a cigarette before you wake up from the disappearance of his warmth and watch the sunrise. It reminds him of you. When he's done with his cigarette, he'll come back inside and either scooch back onto the bed or lean over you to kiss your forehead and wake you up. He'll shake your shoulder gently and call out your name with his messy ginger hair pointing in all different directions. He'll smile down at you when your eyes peek open and place a kiss on your lips, greeting you and rubbing your arm lovingly. Other mornings, ones on the rare occasion that he had off, he would snooze in bed with you for as long as possible. You'd both cook something for breakfast, far from just grabbing a banana or pop tart like you would before work. Afterwards, he'd head to the shower, which you're always welcome to join, and afterwards brush his teeth and hair.

“Hey...time to wake up, y/n. I'm not comin' in here to get ya again, so you gotta get up the first time. No, no five more minutes- I gotta leave soon, so get up before I gotta leave without a goodbye kiss cuz you're still snoozing.”

Fyodor Dostoevsky ★

Fyodor is often up before you are, whether he slept last night or not you don't know, but you certainly don't mind when moments after you open your eyes he's gotten you some tea or coffee. He's great to be woken up by, because he's making sure you're up. He'll come back into the bedroom every two minutes if he needs to, calling out your name from the doorway and warning you that you're going to be late. While you're getting up and ready, he busies himself with reading and peering out the window at the sunrise. When you're finished, he'll kiss you goodbye at the door, his cold hand lingering on your waist as you turn to open the door. After you're gone, he dresses himself in his worn in white button down and pants, topping his outfit off with his boots, cape, and ushanka. He'll look around at the photos hanging on the wall of the two of you and smile to himself, swinging the door opening and leaving as well.

"Ah, good morning Myshka. I see you're finally awake, it only took me waking you up 6 times. I've brought you tea, but you've got to drink it quickly or else you'll hardly have time to get ready for yourself."

A/n; I cry a lot but I am so productive!!! It's an art!! (⁠人⁠*⁠´⁠∀⁠｀⁠)⁠｡⁠*ﾟ⁠+

[dragetunge]

[❇]—;

He's a bit quiet for a bit as he regains his thoughts about him. He would tell her once he had a bit to eat. He felt hungry but he knew he shouldn't push eating too much if he could help it. He was still recovering after eating nothing but broth and mush for gods knows how long he was out. Once everything was going he would probably ask for a lot more pillows to prop himself up. Kinda hurt sitting this way and awkwardly. "I'll tell you while we eat." He tells her gently before she disappears out the door. His gaze shifts from the door to the dragon as he gives him a look. "You need to be nice." The dragon gave him a look and hissed before returning his head onto his lap. "I know you're over protective. But she isn't a threat. So be nice." He accented the last of his words with gentle taps to the dragons nose. Causing Toothless to huff at him as he smiles.

Hiccup dozed a bit while he waited for Merida's return. Almost falling back asleep before jolting a bit as the door creaked back open and hissing at the pain because of it.

"They made all of that for me?" He asks gently. He reaches for the waterskin first as he gently pops the top to take a deep drink from it. Once he was done he wiped his mouth gently with his sleeve before closing its cap and putting it on the table beside him. He had noticed the furniture had been rearranged to be withing reach distance. Taking two of the biscuits he offers one to the dragon who gives it a good smell before taking it. "He usually eats fish. But we'll see later." He smiles gently.

Now where to start....

He started to tell her about the past few months or well year. How his father went off in search of the dragons nest before big ice storms settled onto the isle. How he was left alone with lots of time to himself. He shot down a dragon during a raid and eventually leading up to freeing him and finding him in the cove. "After dragon training that day I brought him food. What Gobber said just....stuck in my mind and when I offered it to him like you I had assumed he had teeth like I had seen in the woods. But.." He motions for Toothless to show her. The dragon merely rolled his eyes as he raised his head. A gummy grin appearing before he unsheathes his teeth before huffing in annoyance. Lowering his head back onto the boys lap as Hiccup chuckles. "That. Before you ask yes I tried other names. No he doesn't want to be called anything else and no he isn't a pet." He gives her a look knowing her a bit too well.

He reached for another tart to eat before he continued and paused to let Merida ask her questions first.

"Ya say that now. But once ya meet 'em... I think tha' feelin' may change. Wee little devils, they are." She scrunched her nose with a laugh before shaking her head. "Mum has banned them from the guest wing until yer well." Her gaze slowly shifted to the dragon and she couldn't help but chuckle sheepishly. "Tho', that might be impossible once they figure out that ya got a dragon in 'ere."

"Outside." She stated dryly, shifting her gaze from Hiccup to Toothless, then to Hiccup once more. "Aye I figured that much. Wanna tell me the real story?" She knew him better than that, but she wouldn't push him for the truth just yet. She would save that for later when she could push him without hurting him. Or perhaps Stoick would fill her in once she asked him about the war... but she wouldn't be surprised if he didn't know the whole story. "Me? I'm always on my best behavior. Can't say the same for your lizard tho'." She teased, smirking at the dragon before nodding. "I'll be right back."

After her trek across the castle to the kitchen, Merida finally returned with a tray of biscuit tarts, despite it being so early in the morning. "Well luckily, Mum and Maudie started out early for ya." She beamed, placing the tray on the nightstand beside him; they always got the best food when visitors were in. She stole one off the top and took a bite before removing the bag from her back. "Mum wanted you to have as much as you needed, she also said she would be up 'ere soon to help with the bandages." She handed him a leather waterskin, it was one she usually took on long trips with Angus so it should last him a few hours at least.

"She also gave me something for him. We weren't sure what he ate so there are a few different cuts of meat and fish." Instead of sitting at his side again, she placed the bag of food for Toothless. She knew Angus wouldn't take anything from strangers, so she figured his friend might be the same. "Did ya call him Toothless? Why?" She saw a full set of teeth when he was snarling at her earlier.

[chenyann]

Cake Bake!!

All boys!!

Today there is a cake bake!, if you don't know what that means let me explain, all students will have to bake a cake in 2 and a half hours.The best cake wins a date with the lovely prefect of ramshackle!

cw: gn!reader, crack & fluff, not much of my normal but I digress, unedited,based off someone who never play the cooking event💀.

Riddle

It looks good

But it's not🥲

It has 3 cups of salt in it

Trey told him it make the sugar sweeter

Plain cake

Plain icing

Plain in general

Yako score:

2/10

Was 0/10

+2 points because the flower

Trey

Looks cute(ˊᗜˋ )

strawberries 😍😍😍😍

tastes just right ✅

He probably added real strawberries inside (´-﹏-`)

Could it be better?

Yes

yako score:

8/10

-2 points because of too much icing

Carter

Looks like red velvet

It's not

It actually paprika

Butter cream icing

It looks like fish food at the top🤢

It's not? I hope

He tried(„• ֊ •„)੭

Yako score:

2/10

-8 because of me thinking it was red velvet.

Ace

No

Let me be like Gordon Ramsay real quick

ITS FUCKING RAW!

Done(•v•)

not only is it ugly

But it's raw

Done eat it babe 😔😔

it's chocolate

Too much chocolate

He probably put salt in it on purpose

Yako score:

0/10

He is gonna kill us both prefect 😪

Deuce

Ummm(·•᷄‎ࡇ•᷅ )

He tried

It tastes ok....

I think

Was ment to be a marble cake

Failed

Too much egg in the icing

it's a plain cake

But with a little chocolate

So In taste wise

It's good

Yako score:

5/10

-5 cause it's ugly

Leona

ruggie made it

Told ruggie to write that

Plain

Plain

Plain

Atleast there is a heart

He gonna drag you to nap after the cake bake

Yako score:

1/10

-9 points because it's rude

Kept one because ruggie made it

Ruggie

Yum

It's plain

But it's from grandma bucchis cook book

😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋

I WOULD EAT IT LIKES ITS A **** I just said tart chill yall

4 layers!!!!!

Butter cream icing 😋

It's a bit original but there is bits of orange in it

That's what makes it a granny bucchi special!

Yako score:

10/10

It's a original, it has a twist,the buttercream makes it sweet but the orange makes it pop!

Jack

Oh?

This was unexpected 🤨

I like it

the sweetness of the berries makes the chocolate more flavourful

I would be better if icing was all around it but it's okay ig

he did his best(˶ᵔᴗᵔ˶)

the icing in the middle is lacking tbh

Yako score:

8/10

The aesthetic wasn't there

Azul

Guys

HEAR ME OUT

He can't bake

Poor boy wants that date tho

So who better to bake than the sea witch

He did Ursula dirty💀💀💀

It would taste good tho

It would taste like berries

Don't ask

But other than the...."lovely" art.

It's okay

Yako score:

6/10

-4 cause of the art

jade

Okay

It delightful

Very cute

may or maynot be real mushrooms...😅

Be careful

You dodon'want to be poisoned now do we(˶ᵔᴗᵔ˶)

butter cream flavored ^^

Yako Score:

9/10

I don't want him to poison me okay

floyd

...

Honestly I don't even know wtf this is

Don't eat

Someone put a caution sign on it

I'm so scared

DOES IT HAVE GRAVEY ON IT*@[++[[]*+

Oh no

God no

I think we are gonna die

I quit

It looks like my cats food

This makes me fr sick

Yako score:......

.......no

Kalim

Jamil done it

BUT!!!!

But. Kalim wrote a long and surprisingly good description of what he wanted made

Don't get me wrong tho, he wanted to make it

It's good

I don't like the nut tho..IM SORRY!😭😭

yako score:

7/10

-3 because of the nuts

Jamil

I didn't really try 🤓

He is lying

Wants to 1 up Kamil so bad

Probably sabotaged kalim💀💀💀

if you praise him istg prefect I will wack you

lives off fondant

Vanilla cake:0

It's really plain tbh

Yako score:

8/10

-2 because it's plain

And boring

Vil

Custom made(๑•̀ㅁ•́๑)

But very pretty 😍

Can I eat the butterflies?????

If not this is a scam

Half of it is organic icing

1/3 is cake

2/3 is icing and air

Don't ask

The design is kinda everywhere

But it somehow works

I think its the pink

Strawberry.

That it

MAYBE CHERRY??????

Yako score: 10/10 if I can eat the butterflies

If not then it's 7/10

Rook

Simple

Uhm

It's simple

It's cute

The colors look divine

positive message

I love it

Maybe a plain cake?

I would eat this

He would put a bit of salt too keep you on ur toes😌

Yako score:100/10

I love the vibes he is making

Epel

...

Don't get me wrong it would taste delightful

I just think he wouldn't know how to decorate it

So he did minions

Ummmmm

Rook offered to give tips but epel said no🙂🙂

Should have let him tbh

but i digress

Yalo score:

4/10

-6 for the minions

Idia

Let's be honest now

It's gonna be one of these

Yucky

Ew

No.

Yako score:

-100000000000000000000000/10

I'm being honest

Ortho

Sweet lil bby♡♡

he is a robot

There is no flaws

Unless he wants one

It is kinda plain

He would have done more

But it's still good

A lil bland

Because he won't eyeball the sugar🙄

But still good

Yako score:

7/10

-3 could be better

Malleus

Why yes that is a wedding cake

*hint hint wink wink*

He cheated and used magic

But you don't need to know

HE WILL DO ANYTHING TO WIN THST DATE WITH YOU PREFCET

he would say yall should cut it together

Smh

Down bad 😔

Plain

If it was me I would say no

Because it's plain

Sorry

Yako score:

3/10

-7 plain and cheated

Lilia

Run

And don't even think about eating it

You will get food poisoning

And it won't be pretty

If you wanna sit on the toilet for the next week then be my guest and eat it

Mayo acts as icing

.....the hotdog looks like a penis

Idk what that yellow stuff is😰😰

Yako score:

- ♾/10

We all know why

Silver

Made 3

His animal friend helped

Probably one of the best hand decorator and baker here

He did nice

It's cute

It's fun

Aesthetic was on point

The flavors would clash

the flowers add taste

Yako score:

10/10

This one is going places

Sebek

Nobody said that

It's okay

Everyone loves you

Sebek is just mad

he will get over it

Plain

I like the rainbow tho

Yako score:

2/10

I Liked the rainbow(〃⌒⤙⌒)ゞ

That all folks!!

Who do you think should win?

[twistedmusings]

A/N: Planning to post some finished requests tonight thankfully but I wanted to share something super self indulgent with you guys since I just recently got an Alexa! I'm still kind of in a funk (since classes are STILL not over with) so thank you everyone for your kind words in my inbox q wq For now I only have Riddle and Leona...but if everyone likes it I'll make an effort to finish! I kinda am working on Azul's as we speak >:3 Warnings: Boys missing you terribly, Riddle justifying the breaking of rules and Leona realizing that he is talking to an inanimate object.

The Ramshackle Prefect leaves to go to RSA for a month, following a lead that could get them back home. And while the dorm leaders do miss them terribly, it seems one of them is hiding something.

. .

“AZUL-SHI DO SOMETHING.”

The Octavinelle dorm leader barely listened to his friend's request as he also crowded over Idia’s phone, the other five dorm leaders looking down at the screen as a pair of familiar eyes stared back at them.

“Where is Idia? Can you please hand me back to him?”

Riddle blinked at the sprite on the screen before looking back at Idia with a frown.

“Explain yourself, Shroud.”

Idia whimpered as he hung his head low in shame.

“[Y/N]-san...I mean...the Prefect left to go to RSA for a whole month, right? Crowley said it was to help them find a way back home but apparently there was some trouble there too and...and he brought them to fix it...”

Malleus’s neutral expression changes into something a bit sadder while Kalim lets out what everybody was thinking.

“To take them away so suddenly...I didn’t even get a chance to give them a goodbye party!”

“They’re only away for a month, Kalim.” Vil’s eyes stay on Idia’s phone screen.

“But I’m sure a party would have let them know how much I would miss them!”

Riddle clears his throat, “That still doesn’t explain anything about what I am seeing. Why in the world do you have something that looks like...that looks so much like them on your phone!”

Idia was sure this was hell. Of all the people to catch him using his phone during a dorm leader meeting, why did it have to be Riddle? What was he even supposed to answer to that question! That he missed talking to [Y/N]-san about the new animes that were releasing this week that he had purposefully made an AI from data Ortho had collected on them and their mannerisms?

He would rather die!

“I--I was testing a new AI! Just...for schedules and stuff like that! And I didn’t have anything else to base it on so I just took [Y/N]-san’s information and made a prototype! It’s not just going to go out to the public like that! They can customize it however they like--!”

Azul hums as he taps the screen, the sprite giggling as he touches their cheek before looking up at all of them expectantly.

“...A prototype, huh.” he smiles and leans back while taking his phone out, “Everybody stop crowding around him, we might as well be breaking his arm slowly at this point.”

The rest of the dorm leader's move back with only some protest, Idia’s eyes shining as he looks up at his other friend.

“Azul-shi…”

The dorm leader of Octavinelle grins, “If it’s a prototype then that means it needs users, correct? More people to test it out?”

“Eh?”

Azul puts his phone in front of Idia and smiles at him like he was just about to close a rather important business transaction.

“Well then I want the prototype as well. Download it to my phone, will you?”

“Eh?!”

Idia presses his phone to his chest as if Azul was about to take it, looking around nervously as the other dorm leaders take their phones out and set it in front of him.

“If it’s an application for scheduling then I could use it to keep Heartslabyul’s matters in check. I’ll take one too.”

“Ruggie is gonna be busy during exams...this thing better work as an alarm.”

“Surely this would help me keep track of my schedule for both the Monstro Lounge and school. I’ll take one with a statistics program built in, Idia”

“Oh!! I want mine to be able to sing! And can I also get them in Scarabia’s dorm uniform? I want to see what [Y/N]-san would look like!’

“I’ll take that as well. I also want a photo re-touch feature as well as one hour updates as to what is going on in my Magicam account.”

Each phone was placed in front of him as Idia felt his head start to spin. He just wanted to keep this thing a secret only for himself! He wasn’t even planning to release it, it was all just a lie so they wouldn’t know his greatest shame!

A shadow was casted over him, Idia looking up slowly as Malleus smiled and placed his phone down.

“I am eager to see your finished product, Shroud.”

The tarts in front of him looked absolutely delicious.

Trey had really outdone himself this time. The strawberries were cut into perfectly neat shapes and the glaze over them made them so mouth wateringly shiny that he could practically taste the sweet treat without even having to taste it!

Which only made his want of one grow even more.

“And here comes the next batch.” Trey smiles as he puts down another plate in front of him, Riddle’s eyes now staring at that plate while his vice dorm leader cleans himself up.

“When did you say the Unbirthday party was going to be today?”

“A-At three o’clock sharp.”

Trey nods as he looks at the clock in the kitchen.

“Perfect. I promised to meet Jade to get some herbs he has been growing as well as letting him teach me how to make this one soup they had in the Monstro Lounge about a week ago.”

He grabs his phone and heads out, leaving Riddle with a quick goodbye and a promise that he would make it back as quick as possible.

Leaving him all alone with two plates filled with his favourite treat.

The dorm leader looks around once...then twice...checking if anybody was coming into the kitchen before going back to stare at the plates.

It wasn’t like he was going to grab one

The Unbirthday party today would be using pastries that Trey had made yesterday. It was the third of the month so the rules required a completely different pastry. The strawberry tarts were most likely for tomorrow.

So Riddle could wait. He was the Heartslabyul dorm leader after all so not only could he wait but he was required to wait! As the dorm leader he was to set an example and he couldn’t let himself be seduced so easily by just two plates of such yummy looking tarts--!

He quickly takes his phone out and looks down at the screen, face flushing as he tries to remember how Idia told him to open up the new app.

“[Y/N]-san…?”

A face peeks out from the corner of his phone, smiling as it recognizes his face and steps out while giving him a polite bow.

“Good morning, Riddle-san! What can I help you with?”

He can’t help a small rush of excitement at seeing the Prefect’s face after not seeing them for two weeks. Riddle would make an effort to stop and talk to them whenever they made their way to Heartslabyul that not seeing them for so long had almost thrown him off his schedule.

And...he missed the conversations he had with them.

As the dorm leader and a student in NRC he didn’t necessarily have time to go to any other events or take part in any of the shenanigans others would get up to, not that he necessarily wanted to, but it was entertaining when the Prefect talked about it with him.

It felt like they were letting him into their world.

So maybe this substitute would suffice...it was a scheduling app after all so it wasn’t like he was using it for pleasure only.

“Would you please repeat rule 56 of the Queen’s handbook?”

The AI clears their throat as a book animation appears before them.

“Rule number 56: On the third of April, black tea should be served along with pineapple tarts. Followed by a game of cards in which the loser must pour the Queen tea for the rest of the Unbirthday party.”

Riddle sighs as he looks back at the plate of tarts.

“...I guess I’ll wait until tomorrow…”

“Wait until what?”

He looks down at the AI, the sprite blinking in confusion as it waits for an answer. Idia had mentioned adding a conversational feature…

“There is no rule about what to eat tomorrow so I decided that we would have strawberry tarts.”

“Are those your favourite?”

Riddle nods and steps out of the kitchen, making his way to his room as he stared back at the open door.

“They are. Ever since I was little. I couldn’t have many because of--”

He decides to not go deep into the subject.

“I’m sure Trey’s pineapple tarts will be excellent. I will just have to wait until tomorrow to enjoy the strawberry ones.”

The AI hums before the book animation pops up again, looking down and flipping a couple of pages before speaking up.

“Riddle-san. While it does say that black tea should be served with pineapple tarts...it does state that it should be done for the Unbirthday party and the Unbirthday party only.”

He frowns, “Your point?”

“I am sure no rule would be broken if only the Queen has a tea party before the Unbirthday party. From what I am seeing here--”

They flip a couple more pages.

“There is no rule about a tea party of one enjoying a strawberry tart.”

Riddle blinks before looking down at his phone, the sprite smiling as they shut the small book and lets it disappear with a ‘poof.’

No rule would be broken...if it was only a tea part of one?

He looks down at the AI when he hears them giggle.

“Riddle-san looks really happy.”

A blush covers his face at being called out on how big his smile probably was.

“Did I help in any way?”

The dorm leader takes a deep breath before smiling as he looks down at the phone and presses his fingertip on top of their head, rubbing it back and forth as if they were petting them. Something he knew he could never really do with them in real life lest he was looking to get odd looks.

“More than enough. Would you like to accompany me during this tea party?”

“Yes please!”

Riddle nods before looking around once more and clearing his throat.

“And...would you refer to me as ‘dorm leader’ from now on?”

The sprite nods as they give him a polite bow.

“Yes, dorm leader!”

He would need to send his report of the app as quickly as possible, Idia had really outdone himself this time...maybe he could ask if he could get them dressed up in the Heartslabyul uniform?

Riddle still wished you would hurry back.

“Leona-san! Please wake up!”

The blankets on the bed wriggled a bit as the phone was tousled over from one side of the bed to the other, the sprite inside frowning as they tried again.

“Leona-san! Please wake up! Ruggie-san texted you!”

A hand comes out of the blankets before holding the phone up.

“Read the text out loud then.”

Sighing, the AI pulls the text up and reads out loud.

“Please be awake by the time I get there, Leona. I need to make sure I get your signature on these papers for the dorm budget. If you don’t I’ll hold your lunch captive!”

Leona’s face finally pops up from under the blanket, the man sitting up and running a hand through his hair as he speaks up again.

‘Oi. What time is it?”

“It is 3:14 in the afternoon, Leona-san.”

“And when did Ruggie send the text?”

“At 3:00 o'clock.”

He groans and lays back down, the pillows flying about as he holds the phone to his face and smiling when he sees the sprite looking down at him worriedly.

“You really do look like them…” Leona whispers before tapping the screen so that he is poking the sprite’s cheek, “What is that face for?”

“I’m just worried for you, Leona-san. Too much sleep is a symptom of some sicknesses so--”

“Hah? You think I would get sick so easily?” he yawns and stretches, “I’m different from humans. Beastmen need a lot more sleep than regular humans do so...I’m just doing what my body tells me.”

Green eyes watch a notepad appear before the AI as they write down the information, smiling as they close it up and watch it disappear.

“I’ll keep that information in mind so I can serve Leona-san better. Thank you so much.”

Leona blinks at the words before a lazy smile crosses his face.

“Serve me better, huh? Never thought I would hear you say that.”

Usually the herbivore would be frowning and telling him to get up and actually take charge of his dorm and how he didn’t act like any grown up they knew. The sprite, however, tilts their head in confusion before speaking up once again.

“I am yours, after all.”

“Damn right you are.”

He looked at the phone a bit more, the sprite smiling up at him as he poked their cheek or patted their head. A part of him wondered if you would react like that with him as well. You always seemed so annoyed with his antics yet you never failed to come back to talk to him, telling him how he needs to get his act together if he is ever planning to go back to the Afterglow.

Leona would bet money that if he patted your head out of nowhere you would be highly flustered. Getting praise from him was something that didn’t happen often, after all.

“What day is it?”

“The 12th day of April, Leona-san.”

Another two weeks of you being gone. He frowns and closes his eyes as he thinks about you meeting those other students. RSA was just full of idiots...like his brother--

“Dammit.”

He slams the phone down but blinks when he hears a small yelp, turning the phone back around to find the AI looking rather frazzled with their eyes closed and hair all over the place.

“Shit. Are you....okay?”

Great, he was asking an application if it was okay. He could understand why Idia would hide this, right now he felt like he was crazy.

“Y--Yes! It was just unexpected!”

The sprite fixed itself up quickly and smiled back at Leona.

“Are you okay though, Leona-san?”

The dorm leader chuckled and nodded as they set the phone down gently and laid down next to it. At least that part was very much like you, worrying about others before focusing on yourself.

“You’re not going to complain? I almost just threw you.”

Without missing a beat, the AI stands up and looks at him.

“Leona-san is still working hard despite his body telling him to sleep. My program tells me that it would be a natural emotion to feel frustrated if you are not allowed to do something you want. Normal actions of frustration speak of physical manifestations such as kicking, punching or throwing. I was simply calculating it for it to be the latter and for it to happen towards a pillow. I’ll make sure to fix my calculations next time.”

He shakes his head and sets the phone down gently.

“Weird thing. You shouldn’t forgive someone so easily after they wronged you.”

“But you didn’t wrong me, Leona-san. I didn’t feel any pain. I just want to make sure you are feeling your best! You are my number one priority!”

This machine is going to make him go insane, he knows you would never say that but the fact that Idia had gotten your voice down so well that it was almost as if you had just told him he was your number one---

He was already getting a headache.

“Set an alarm for an hour. Ruggie will take around that long anyway.” Leona lays down and wraps the blankets around him.

“Of course. Alarm set for one hour. Would you like to be woken up with a personalized message?”

Leona hummed before grinning.

“Wake me up by calling me ‘King’.”

The sprite fixes its settings before giving a polite bow.

“Yes, my King. Please enjoy your rest.”

After this he would send his report to Shroud and maybe ask for an outfit upgrade. He only needed to show him some Afterglow clothes and the nerd would probably be able to make the AI wear them, right?

Whatever, the moment you came back Leona would make sure that you gave him some headpats for making him wait so long.

[lilxberry]

That’s My Girl - Scott Lang

Requested by: @bnhaxreaderquotes​

Could I have a Scott Lang x longterm girlfriend fic?? Where she’s like super strong but super dumb?? Like she’s Thor but human and female XD bonus if she lifts Thor’s hammer to get to something and everyone’s like 👀 and she’s like ??? And scots like 🥰 “that’s my gf”

I loved this idea, I just really didn’t want to use the word stupid so much lmao I mostly referred to reader as “slow” I believe but like, this whole thing is kinda cute asf so I’m happy with it. I hope you’re happy with it too

Warnings: Like, a singular swear. Sweet ass Scott. Upset!Reader? IDEK ANYMORE.

Words: 1,645

Pairings: Scott Lang x Reader (female reader) (super strong reader?)

Unplanned sequel; That’s My Wife

_______________

There’re many words to describe you.

Sweet? Yes. Kind? Yep. Selfless? Definitely. Beautiful? 100%. Strong? No doubt.

Stupid?

No, just…slow.

It’s not that you lacked intelligence, just, your brain worked at a different pace to that of others. Your fellow teammates could tell you that. Especially your partner Scott.

Scott, the sweetie pie that he is, certainly tries his best to help you catch up, to understand things that hadn’t really made sense to you at first. He’s no stranger to defending you either, no matter who or what it’s against.

Including your teammates.

“So, like C-3P0?”

Your head was tilted in confusion and your face was scrunched up as you tried desperately to understand what Tony was talking about.

You had walked into the lab finding all of the Avengers surrounding Tony rambling on about his newest creation, engineering some crazy new robotic tech. The others that had been subjected to his showcasing had explained to you that he’d called them in, forced them to watch the unveiling of Frankenstarks newest monster.

When you had asked why you hadn’t been called in, you’d missed the way Tony and the others tensed up. They knew that you wouldn’t understand a word Stark was speaking, as if the man were speaking some foreign language to you, but they didn’t want to explain that it was because you were ‘dense’.

The heaven-sent that is Scott stepped forward, a big, bright smile on his face as he entwined his fingers with your own as he came up with an excuse for the billionaire, saving Starks’ skin and sparing your feelings.

“He thought you’d find it boring. We all do to be honest honey but only so many of us are lucky enough to have an out,” was the sugar-coated explanation he conjured up on the spot.

You bought it easily, nodding in understanding with the sweetest of smiles before reaching up on your tiptoes to plant a kiss on his cheek. The others visibly relaxed, though you were oblivious as you stared up at Scott with a love-sick expression.

You had then gone on to ask what exactly it was that Tony had been working on which had led to a longwinded explanation with wild gestures and a heap of words you certainly didn’t understand whatsoever. Truth be told, he’d lost you within the first sentence.

Tony heaved a sigh. “No, not like C-3P0. The design is completely different and the level of A.I. being used it higher than that of C-3P0,” he spoke exasperatedly, a mocking tone taking over his tone near the end.

Feeling even more confused that what you had originally felt, you tried once more to understand.

“So…like Vision?”

Sam snorted as majority of the others smirked or tried to supress their smiles, Vision unsurprisingly seemed stoic as ever. Tony, on the other hand, had a look of genuine surprise. Almost looking proud.

“Uh, yeah, actually. You worked that out a lot faster than I thought you would honestly,” Tony said as an off-handed comment causing the others to still and Scott to tense slightly beside you while your brows furrowed.

“What’d you mean?”

Scott once again interjected to save the day, dragging your attention to him instead. “None of us really got it, that’s all. I’m pretty sure Thor still doesn’t, honestly.” He whispered the last part as he pointed his thumb towards the towering, blonde Asgardian.

Although your heart fluttered at the thought of Scott trying to be so sweet and kind to you, you couldn’t help the hurt that spread through you. You knew how the others viewed you, how they thought you were stupid, how you don’t understand anything.

Rather than show it affected you, you forced a smile on to your face and a tiny giggle to pass your lips.

Glancing at the others before allowing your eyes to fall back on to your boyfriend, you kept the feigned smile on your lips as you spoke. “I just remembered I gotta load of stuff to do. I’ll see you guys later.”

Scott flashed you his pearly whites in a wide smile before pecking your forehead and giving you a quiet “Sure babe.”

Walking backwards, you called out loudly to the group before exiting the room. “Have fun with Vision 2.0.”

Usually, when the team unintentionally commented on you in such a way, it would never really affect in such a negative way but today, it was just a series of failure after failure, your day all-round being bad.

From the comment in the lab, to the accidental breaking of a trainee’s arm due to you forgetting the strength you held over others, to Steve and Bucky taking the last of the coffee in the pot of the coffee machine which you had no idea how to work.

You had even bumped into someone in the hallway, the file you had been carrying falling to the ground and the papers inside scattering across the floor in disarray, leaving you to try reorganising the lot, taking a whole hour and a half.

It’s unfortunate that the person to be at the end of your disgruntled mood would be someone who you strongly considered a friend.

The Avengers who were currently residing at the compound were all scattered within the main living area and the open kitchen when you walked in, looking dishevelled as you frantically searched for a package that you had been notified had been delivered.

Walking through, you looked to see if the damn thing was atop any table you passed. Hell, you even lifted one of the chairs slightly to see if someone was cruel enough to hide the thing under it.

Although everyone had opted to watch you curiously, it was your sweet Scott to break the silence.

“Hey honey, whatcha’ doing there?” he asked curiously.

You grumbled out your answer, honestly ready for the day to be over with. “I’m looking for my delivery.”

Sam snorted before pointing towards the island in the centre of the kitchen. “You mean that massive package right there?”

Low and behold, there sat your package on top of the cool, marble surface, just with an added feature. You scowled, storming over towards the thing. You turned your fiery gaze to Thor, who was overall minding his own business chowing down on the entire contents of a Pop Tart box.

“WHY DID YOU PUT YOUR HAMMER ON MY FUCKING DELIVERY?!” You roared out, everyone’s eyes widened in complete and utter shock, Thor even jumped at the sudden loud booming. As he opened and reclosed his mouth repeatedly in a pathetic attempt to say something, anything, you continued.

“There could’ve been something really important in there! Or-or super fragile or something! What if you broke it?!”

During your explosion at the poor Asgardian, you happened to grasp the handle of Mjölnir and lift it with ease, causing everyone’s eyes to widen further and even a few mouths to drop open, gaping at the sight in front of them, Tony choking on his drink that he had been taking a sip of. Although Scott was just as shocked as those around him, he more so looked like a small child who’s completely wonder-struck, a twinkle in his eye.

“Never, and I mean NEVER, put your hammer on my damn things again. GOT IT?!” You shoved the hammer into Thors’ chest harshly, causing him to fumble to get a hold of it.

Once certain he had a tight grasp on the thing, you released your hold and spun on the spot, now becoming witness to everyone’s flabbergasted expressions. “WHAT?” you asked in exasperation and confusion, today completely tiring you out mentally and emotionally.

A pregnant silence befell you all before Scott suddenly jumped out of his seat, face ecstatic, arms raised high into the air above his head, hands balled up into fists, a loud and excited shout escaping him.

“YES!”

“You-you’re worthy?” Thor asked quietly to no one in particular.

Your brows furrowed deeply, now entirely confused and ever so slightly self-conscious. “What?”

“You’re worthy babe! Hell yeah! Up top!” he had made his way over towards you, now one arm raised with his hand now relaxed, waiting on you to give him a high five.

“I’m not following…”

“Only Thor could lift the hammer ‘cause he was the only one who’s worthy or whatever. It’s like impossible for anyone else to lift it,” Clint started to explain before being cut off by Natasha.

“Until you, that is. You’re the only other one whose been able to lift it.”

“Oh,” was all you said before shrugging your shoulders and waddling your way past Scott and towards your package on the kitchen island, picking it up and beginning to walk away.

Before you left though, you thought this to be the perfect opportunity to finally boast about something that you had been able to do that the others couldn’t. “Well, I may be stupid but at least I don’t put my back out by trying to lift a little hammer.”

You smirked as you continued to walk away, your destination being your room, package what would be heavy to most in your arms. Scott laughed loudly, something you could hear as you continued to retreat to your bedroom.

Meanwhile…

“HELL YEAH! THAT’S MY GIRL! WOO!” Scott began to follow after you, still shouting out every single word he spoke. “HONEY! THAT WAS LIKE THE COOLEST THING EVER! DID YOU SEE THEIR FACES?! Oh man, I can’t wait to tell Cass. SHE’S GONNA FREAK!”

The Avengers were still suck in their retrieves of shock, all unmoving, all trying to process the newfound information that you could lift the hammer.

Thor seemed to be taking it the worst, looking ever so slightly frightened, gulping loudly.

“I believe I have new matters to discuss with my father...”

_______________

.

.

.

.

.

I love any Paul Rudd character just as much as him

I even have a t-shirt with his beautiful ass face on lmao

If you want to be added to a taglist lemme know

Anywho, I hope you enjoy

As always, constructive criticism and requests are welcomed and greatly appreciated :D

_______________

Marvel taglist:

@thanossexual

[shreddedparchment]

What is your dream date with on Thor Odinson? Also, don't be shy, why want all the deets on the aftershow, hehe.

Ooof, okay. So, dream date? Thor would pick me up at my door but I live in a city where I can walk to places and don't have to drive. So, we literally just walk down a couple blocks to get some coffee and end up taking it to go to sit on some bench in some park and just talk.

I invite him back to my place to eat dinner and he volunteers to cook but all I have in my fridge is stuff for pancakes so he makes pancakes and he has a side of pop tarts. We end up moving into the living room and I boot up probably Mario Party but Thor’s hands are too big for the joycons so it makes him bad at all the mini games and he loses but he's playful about it and nudges me repeatedly with his shoulder when I tease him about sucking. He laughs a lot.

We end up making some tea and settling into the sofa to watch a movie but as soon as the lights go out and in that darkness before the movie starts, there's a literal electric charge in the air and when the TV flares to life, Thor’s sitting closer. He smiles at me confidently and I'm a little shier but return the smile.

As the movie gets going he openly takes my hand with one hand and after a few minutes of sitting kinda stiff, I relax and sit a little more comfortably by folding my leg up onto the seat next to him. This puts my leg almost on top of his knee so he makes room for it and holds my hand over it but also brings his other hand to rest on my knee.

We're both highly aware of the parts of us touching the other and we don't concentrate on the movie much. Halfway through I steal a glance at him but find him watching me and he looks like he's been doing so for a while instead of the TV so I just stare back and he leans over, no hesitation whatsoever, and kisses me.

His hand on my leg is a little more firm as he pulls it up further on his lap and instinctively I put my other up with it. This gives him the space to snake his arm around my waist and as we're lost in the kissing and the way his hand flexes around my hip, he lays me down and settles his weight over me.

Our kissing grows more intense, the movie forgotten, our breathing heavy as his hands start to search for bits of my skin to touch. He pushes his hand under my dress and our makeout turns into full groping as I also reach down to feel his bum through his jeans.

There's gunfire coming from the movie and it's loud but our heavy pants and gasping is louder.

He suddenly pulls me up, sitting down on the sofa again as he yanks me into his lap to straddle his hips. He's a little wild in his movements to pull the top of my dress down and I hear a rip somewhere but don't care enough to wonder what just tore.

Once he has me topless he's licking circles between my breasts and up along my collarbone. I'm breathless with anticipation and my skin erupts into goosebumps as his lips close around one of my nipples.

Of course, this isn't his first romp with me so he knows I'm done with that attention somewhat quickly and starts to grope my butt, flicking the skirt of my dress up so he can get some skin to skin touching.

I'm already grinding down against him. The fabric of his jeans chaffs a little but the feeling of him pressing against me overrides that.

His hands get rougher as he yanks me against his pelvis and unable to help it anymore he stands up and takes me with him as he carries me to the bedroom.

He drops me onto my bed and I remove my tattered dress while he pulls his own shirt over his head and removes his pants.

Before I can strip anymore he's on his knees, shoving my legs up, removing my undies, and pushes my legs wide as he dips his head between them and starts to devour me with abandon.

I fist his hair, pulling him up to my clit because I'm impatient and he growls at my enthusiasm, hands tightening around my thighs while he laps me up.

He reaches underneath his mouth and begins to press his fingers along the muscles of my entrance not penetrating me but spreading me open.

The added pressure pushes me over and I orgasm. Legs trembling, toes curled, feet at the verge of cramping.

I'm gasping, stunned, and start to sit up to get my own taste of his own thunder thighs but he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and takes hold of my shoulders, pushing me back down as he climbs up. He knee-walks the very short distance to me and only stops when his thighs are pressed against the back of mine. He falls heavy against me.

He strokes himself but he's impatient too and he pushes into me fairly quickly. He doesn't stop until he's all the way in and I'm tensed. My hands are claws along his lower stomach and he waits a few seconds for me to adjust. Meanwhile he's got his thumb doing circles around my sensitive spot, making me twitch with overstimulation.

When my hands relax and I take hold of his wrists, he knows I'm ready.

He nudges my legs wider, around his hips as he lays himself over me, one hand cupping my breast while the other he places on the back of my neck and squeezes.

It's a compact position and he's right on me, no space between our bodies. He thrusts once. Twice. Three times slow then harder. He kisses me and his hips are cracking against mine in desperate desire.

Every thrust hits my sweet spot and his kiss is endless. He finally breaks it but only to groan. His grunts get louder as he starts to pick up the pace just a little and the rhythm he finds is perfection and I beg him not to stop.

"Just like that."

He buries his head into my neck, tongue out and wild as he licks at my skin and bites gently with well trained restraint. He'd break the skin otherwise.

He suddenly thrusts into me hard, his hips stuttering as he releases into me, but he doesn't stop until he feels my legs wrap around his hips and hold him still as I reach my own peak.

This time I actually get a cramp in my calf and cry out.

He scrambles up, with wide blue eyes and his blonde hair absolutely everywhere and sticking to his sweaty neck, terrified that he's hurt me but I can only hold up my leg and grimace as the cramp gets worse.

Thor relaxes and starts to chuckle, sitting back down and reaching over to take my leg and massage the tired spot.

It hurts and I grab a pillow and smack him with it but he just laughs and takes the smack.

When my cramp is gone, he lays down with me, arms wrapping around my waist again as he pulls me close.

Then his stomach growls and we end up getting up to eat again. 🥴

[abundanceofnots]

Prompt! After seeing that ball gag in the basketball hoop in their room, I’m hilariously imagining Franny wandering downstairs with it during breakfast or something and everyone freaks out about it, or something similar lol

Forewarning: As you could’ve guessed, this one is pretty dirty. In fact, I’ll probably never recover from writing some of these words. You’ll know which ones I mean. Damn it, Shameless, why are these things canon?!

---

They were talking again. Loud, like they didn’t give two shits who could hear them, even though the house was full of people.

Lately, it’d become almost nonstop, and Debbie had just about enough of it – and them.

“Take it, you insatiable slut!” 

“Yes, fuckin’ impale me with your monster cock!”

As she stood behind the closed accordion door, which frankly did nothing to silence all the bizarre exclamations and assorted sex noises, she scrunched her face in disgust. Thankfully, her ears only felt like they were bleeding, and the real damage was happening just to her inner calm.

This time, Ian and Mickey were going at it at half past seven on a Sunday, throwing around words that would make even the creators of bad pornos cringe. 

They’d been on her shitlist ever since she found several dried come stains on her lilac bath robe, and really, her frustration with them only grew stronger from there. It was one thing that they apparently made sex into a full-time hobby; sounding like absolute perverts throughout their daily (and nightly) numerous rounds was another. 

Debbie could take it no more. She was long past the point of finding it funny. There were now very specific, lewd details about her older brother forever embedded in her mind – and she fondly looked back at the days when Ian was still behind bars and dearly missed.

Checking that her palm was covering Franny’s eyes, she squeezed her own eyes tightly before getting a blind hold on the accordion door. She yanked it open, immediately causing the verbal vomit to stop.

“The actual fuck, Debbie!” 

She heard scrambling and annoyed groans and, eventually, to what sounded like a fight over the comforter, the bed creaked as someone got off it. She took that as her cue and secured her hold on Franny, who started to dig her little fingers into Debbie’s palm.

“I’ve had it with you two assholes!” she raged, using her free hand to gesticulate wildly. “I was fine with the exaggerated moans and the fact that seeing your ugly naked asses around on a daily basis was now a given, but if I have to hear the words uber-masculine slut and dom top daddy one more time, I’m gonna make sure you won’t be able to stick your dicks anywhere. For a long time.” 

She paused, becoming faintly aware that someone was hurriedly trying to get dressed somewhere to her left.

“Now, I’m gonna go back to bed,” she continued, much calmer, satisfied that her case was being heard without protests, “and you’re gonna watch Franny because you both owe me. Big time.”

The room was silent, the atmosphere tense. Debbie let out a frustrated huff. 

“Just tell me when,” she prompted, too scared to open her eyes. 

For a second, it seemed like Ian and Mickey argued without saying a thing out loud. Then, settling on whatever, Ian cleared his throat. 

“Yeah.”

Debbie immediately regretted not leaving without sparing them another glance. Because while Ian was at least dressed, standing in front of her in his boxers and a T-shirt that was both too tight and inside-out, Mickey sat on the bed only with the comforter bunched in his lap. 

They were both sweaty and out of breath, and Debbie felt herself flush when she noticed the visible handprints on Mickey’s neck. 

Still, she recovered fast, piercing them both alternately with a hard stare. “Can’t believe I even have to say this, but no fucking in front of my kid!” she warned, pointing her finger at them.

---

The slam of Debbie’s bedroom door successfully burst the strange bubble they got themselves caught up in. Their eyes instantly snapped to each other. 

“I call shower,” Ian announced plainly.

“Fuck you, I call shower first,” Mickey countered. “I was about to bust a nut anyway.”

“What’s bustanut?”

It was the first thing they heard Franny say, and, yeah, Debbie was definitely going to break both of their dicks after this, wasn’t she?

“Well, Franny,” Ian started as he leaned down to her, maneuvering her a little so that she wouldn’t catch a glimpse of Mickey’s naked form as he untangled himself from the comforter, “that’s a thing adults say when they have to brush their teeth. And your Uncle Mickey has a really stinky breath this morning.”

“Like you’re one to talk, bitch.” 

Ian looked up to Mickey poking his tongue in his cheek, his loosely curled fist moving in front of his face in a rather obvious motion. He shot him a glare, but Mickey just pulled his boxers up and left the room, chuckling.

The good news was that Franny seemed content with that. Shrugging her shoulders, she hopped on their rumpled bed and started jumping on it. Ian decided it was better than having to crack the ol’ concept of male ejaculation to her on an early Sunday morning and went about his routine as usual. 

It didn’t take long until something else caught Franny’s attention and she started making low frustrated noises.

Putting on his deodorant, Ian watched in the mirror as she struggled with the cap of their lube. 

“Is this a special sauce?” she asked, all bright-eyed and curious.

Ian snickered. Franny knew all about special sauces ever since Liam started experimenting with making his own in the kitchen a few weeks ago. 

“Yeah, I guess it kinda is a special sauce, in a way,” he replied amusedly. “Uncle Mickey says he doesn’t like it, but he’s a filthy liar.” 

“Smells like strawberries.”

“Yeah, it does.” He turned, grinning at her. “Nice, huh?” 

She held the tube out for him. “Can I try?”

Instead of opening it for her like she probably expected, Ian took it from her and shoved it in the closest drawer.  

“Maybe in a few years.” 

Franny sighed dramatically, and Ian observed in real-time as he started losing his fun uncle points with her. But it didn’t matter how pouty she got; he couldn’t actually let her play with their lube. Mickey was right – that shit was expensive.

It only took about a minute this time before she got bored again. Kicking the bed involuntarily with her feet hanging over its edge, she scanned the messy room. Finally, her eyes fell on a black leathery thing laid on top of the laundry basket by the bed. 

“What’s that?”

Ian pursed his lips as he thought of the best answer, but before he could give her any, he got interrupted.

“It’s a ball gag,” Mickey supplied as he strode into the room with only a towel around his hips. His hair was wet, and the unashamedly self-satisfied smirk on his face had Ian roll his eyes.

“What’s a ball gag?”

“It’s—”

“A toy!” Ian said, a little panicky. “A toy that Uncle Ian and Uncle Mickey like to play with. Especially Uncle Mickey.”

Pausing on his way to their closet, Mickey smacked Ian’s ass. Waggling his eyebrows, he then leaned in to lightly peck his cheek.

“You betcha.” 

Franny’s eyes widened with excitement. “Can I play, too?” 

She got her hands on the contraption at the same time as Ian, who at first tried to scare her off with a stern look. Failing that, he started pulling on the strap, giving out a somewhat tentative laugh.

“Really not a good idea.”

“I wanna play, too! Please!”

“Franny—”

With an ear-splitting screech, she slipped the ball gag from Ian’s grasp and set off running out of the room.

“Crap,” Ian muttered, slapping hard at Mickey’s arm when he had the nerve to chuckle. “Dumbass, your dick’s on the line here, too, you know?”

In the kitchen, he found Franny making rounds around the table; the sex toy held over her head victoriously like a golden trophy. Thankfully, the only person sitting there was Lip, who seemed genuinely entertained by the sudden spectacle.

“Uncle Lip, Uncle Lip, do you wanna play with my ball gag?” Franny asked mid-run.

“Uh, maybe later?” Still smiling, Lip shot his brother a look, pointedly raising a brow.

“Franny?” Ian tried playing nice with a sing-song voice. When the kid slipped past him over and over again, he decided to change his tactics. “Franny! Gimme that!”

“No!” she yelled stubbornly as she took off toward the living room. Unluckily for her, that’s where Mickey, having come down the other set of stairs, caught her. 

As he walked back with her, he held her under his arm so that her tiny legs kicked the air behind his back as she tried to wiggle free. “Sorry, kid, but Uncle Mickey doesn’t share his toys,” he told her as he settled her down in the kitchen. 

Lip sniggered into his mug. 

“So, breakfast?” Mickey suggested after he passed the ball gag to Ian. “I’m fuckin’ starving.”

While Ian hid the sex toy upstairs, Mickey made Pop-Tarts. And Franny, being the good girl she was, sat there through all that and quietly sulked. 

Then, after nibbling on her breakfast for some time, she stood up resolutely.

“I’m gonna go bustanut,” she stated loudly, nearly prompting Lip to choke on his coffee.

He watched as Mickey cackled, and shook his head.

“Debbie’s gonna kill you both, you know?”

Mickey just smirked. “Can’t wait to see her try.”

[xaphrin]

Jason groaned as he sunk down on the floor, gasping for breath. “You have got to learn to be more gentle with my body. I’m a finely tuned machine, you can’t just go throwing me around on the mats.” 

Raven gave him a flat stare, pushing her sweaty hair out of her eyes. “A finely tuned machine? That runs on cigarettes, pop tarts, and booze?” She leaned over and started stretching, something he often ignored after their sparring sessions. 

Jason shrugged and stood up, walking outside the ring to grab their water bottles. “Fuel is fuel.” 

When he turned back, he caught an eyeful of her plump, round ass as she bent over to stretch her hamstrings. Biting back a curse, he glanced away and shook his head, trying to clear the images from his memory. Honestly, she was a temptation he couldn’t afford right now. But… he glanced back at her and she rolled her spine back to standing … there was no harm in just looking at her, right? 

“Mm. I am going to disagree with you there.” Raven grabbed her water from his hand and swallowed several mouthfuls, the water sliding over her chin, down her neck, and falling against her breasts. She wiped at her mouth and cocked her head to the side, watching him. “I don’t think there are enough calories in your day to even keep you alive, let alone actually function as a finely tuned machine.” She twisted her shoulders and lifted her eyes to the ceiling, thinking. “You need to eat real food.” 

He snorted. “And are you going to cook it for me? Resident water-burner?” 

“No.” She rolled her eyes. “You have access to the Wayne accounts. We order takeaway like normal adults who don’t cook.” 

He smirked and followed her out of the training room. Raven was in Gotham helping his family with a case, but tonight the manor was surprisingly empty - even Alfred was out for the night. That left Raven and Jason perusing websites on their cell phones, looking for the best takeaway they could get their hands on. 

“Thai?”

“No, we had that two days ago.” Raven sighed and glanced up at him. “Sushi?”

Jason made a face. “I hate the sushi place that delivers out here, and I’m not driving to the other one.” 

“Well, you better pick somewhere soon, because I’m getting hungry.” Raven stood up and turned to the electric kettle, putting water in it to boil. With a sigh, she turned back to Jason. “What are you doing here tonight anyway? Don’t you have some drug ring to bust?”

Jason shrugged. “B’s out of town, and sometimes I like to enjoy all the comforts of the manor, without having to deal with its residents.” He stood up and grabbed her favorite tea from the top shelf, handing it to her. “I don’t think there’s anything wrong with wanting to lounge by the indoor pool and use fiber optic internet to watch porn.”

Raven rolled her eyes and grabbed the box of tea from him. “You do not watch porn by the pool. You watch Die Hard for the millionth time. I’ve seen your play history.”

“Hey!” Jason placed a hand on his chest, pretending to be indignant. “I’ll have you know that last week I watched Busty Broads Six - Vegas Temptations. The plot didn’t follow the first five, but the cinematography was en pointe.”

Raven tried to look annoyed, but she cracked a smile at the corner of her mouth and glanced up at him from beneath her lashes. A small, musical giggle escaped and she leaned back against the counter, her eyes searching his face. “Do you ever listen to yourself speak? Or do you let it rush out in a string of crass comments?” 

“Not listening to myself speak has saved me from a world of social embarrassment.” He grinned at her, and reached for his phone. “Pizza it is.”

Jason ordered dinner for them both, a little bit proud of himself that he remembered what toppings Raven liked on her pizza. She was pouring boiling water over a tea bag when he finally hung up, and she glanced over her shoulder at him. The light in the kitchen was always a stark white, but in this moment, Raven looked so soft and touchable. He could feel his fingers itch to reach out and brush a lock of hair from her eyes. 

“So…” Raven turned around to face him, a smirk playing on her lips. “Should we start Die Hard again, or would you rather watch Busty Broads Seven - Tits in Toronto?” 

Jason couldn’t stop the laughter if he tried, and he leaned back on his heels, watching her. Something in his chest twisted almost painfully and he found himself wanting to kiss her. He had always harbored somewhat of a crush towards her, but now he was beginning to understand how deep those feelings really ran. Raven was smart and funny, and she was so beautiful it almost hurt to look at her sometimes. She knew just how to push him to make him succeed, and when to back off and give him space. 

“You look lost in thought there, Jay.” She stepped forward and poked at his chest, looking up at him with another smirk. “Does it surprise you that I offered to watch porn with you?”

He shook his head free of his thoughts and forced a teasing grin on his lips, trying to hide where his mind had been. “Nah. I’d always figured you’d be kinda kinky like that. I’m more surprised you’re familiar with Busty Broads.” 

Raven laughed and stepped back, moving towards the kitchen door. She motioned for him to follow her. “Come on. If we’re gonna do this, then we should at least crack open some liquor. Now, remind me, where does Bruce keep the good stuff…”

Jason stumbled after her, his grin so wide it almost hurt. Oh, yeah. He was definitely in love with her. 

[blu-eh]

Prompt request if your up to it (kinda specific idk how I came up with it). You know the idea that Peter steals the Avenger's food when they don't yet know who he is? I was thinking if he were ever stealing Thor's poptarts (or whatever other food) and Thor decided to put Mjolnir on top, maybe record footage of it at night, and Peter is half asleep while moving the hammer and taking the pop tarts leaving everyone watching him super confused at the whole situation. Weird I know but I thought this could be super funny, do with it what you'd like.

as per what I usually do with prompts: I took this and then ran with it in the opposite direction. messy & unedited ofc

“I know the hazing rituals for the Avengers would probably be a ride or die but this is just ridiculous,” Peter says.  

“It’s punishment,” Mr. Stark tells him. 

All in all, it’s pretty terrible punishment. Peter had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar—or the poptart box, in this very specific case—no less than three times in the past mouth which, yeah. Peter can’t really say he was the best at sneaking around but, to be fair, it wasn’t like he knew the poptarts were Thor’s specifically. 

Following a very important Avengers level meeting that involved the entire team, the conclusion to protect Thor’s poptarts was not to write his name on them like any sensible person but instead to take his very large and very magical hammer and leave it on a box of poptarts so Peter could no longer access them. 

Which is the exact scene that Peter Parker walked into on that early Sunday morning after taking a car to the side and getting smashed around by the lizard. Devastated seems a little dramatic to describe the feelings Peter experienced upon realization, but there had been nothing he’d been looking to more than taking a poptart and possibly a nap. And as cool as it is to see Thor’s hammer up close, it’s currently in the way of Peter’s very important weekend cooldown that usually involves some tasty preserved parties and a bed. 

Now that won’t happen because the Avengers put Thor’s hammer on said box of poptarts. 

Still. You would think the Avengers would be more creative in their Anti-Spider-Man Stealing Mechanisms. 

Peter tells Mr. Stark as much. 

“Doesn’t need to be creative if it works,” Mr. Stark says which is more than a little hypocritical considering Mr. Stark takes the word creative to the extreme on a good day. “It’s stopping you right now, isn’t it?” 

Peter sighs with all of the exasperation of a super-powered teenager who hasn’t had food in at least two hours and a truck load of determination to spare, rolls up his nonexistent sleeves on his t-shirt, and says, “Okay. No one can say I don’t like challenges.”

 - 

“If you can put Thor’s hammer in an elevator and the elevator still moves up, then we’re working on the assumption that the hammer is only heavy when something interacts with it so—hey, Mr. Stark, could one of your suits lift it?” 

“Not with me in it,” Mr. Stark says. 

The rest of the Avengers had taken to watching Peter try and figure out the like it was some 90s soap opera—which is to say, they have been absolutely invested since the moment that Peter started writing on the whiteboard and pacing around the common room. 

“He’s still going at this?” Mr. Steve whispers to Ms. Nat. 

“He hasn’t stopped since he came here,” Ms. Nat says right back. 

Peter dutifully ignores outside conversations and scribbles his notes on the Avengers- approved whiteboard that he’d dug out of Mr. Stark’s lab for the sole purpose of trying to figure out how to free a box of poptarts from a magic hammer. “Yeah, you’re not worthy so you wouldn’t be able to lift it—”

“Thank you for the reminder, Underroos.” 

“But I’m talking about like, if it were just the suit. Hey, would FRIDAY be worthy? Could she drive a suit and lift the hammer? She’s not technically alive so maybe…Never mind, we’ll test that later. Would something like a pulley work? If I’m not directly lifting it, would that still influence the magic still? Dr. Banner, what do you think?”

“Truthfully, I have no opinion on this, Peter,” Dr. Banner says.  

“I think,” Sam says. “That you are putting way too much thought into a magic hammer.” 

“A magic hammer that’s on my food.” 

“It’s Thor’s,” Sam says. “Not yours.” 

“That hammer? I figured that was pretty obvious.” 

“Sam looks two seconds away from lunging and wringing Peter’s neck. He takes a deep breath and says, “No. The food.” 

“Minor detail,” Peter says. “Hey, do you think—”

 -

Clint whistles. “Impressive.”

Sam’s got that mom-friend worrying look in his eyes and a hand on his cellphone already to dial emergency services or, worse, Peter’s aunt. “Is that…is that going to work?” 

“Honestly, I have no idea,” Peter says. 

‘That’ is a cumulation of nuts and pipes and bolts and various scrap metal that Peter has managed to scrape up and put together in the last two hours. It towers over the living area and into the kitchen. A roller coaster of science, compacted down into a Rube Goldberg constructed out of more than a couple thousand dollars of junk pieces and starts with a single marble that’s no bigger than a quarter. 

Peter’s done a look of cool stuff in his two years of Avengering—missions, messing around in Mr. Stark’s lab, working on top secret projects for an even more top secret government—but he’s not quite sure anything lives up to this masterful creation. 

Mr. Steve and Mr. Stark are off to the side with the rest of the Avengers who cared enough to watch him construct everything after the five hour mark. Mr. Steve leans over to Mr. Stark and whispers, almost too quiet for Peter to hear, “Should you stop him?”

“The good mentor slash guardian thing would be to stop him,” Mr. Stark says right back. “But at this point, I’m invested so no.” 

That’s about as good of permission as Peter’s ever going to get so he takes the first step and drops the marble into a pipe. From there, it moves through wood pieces, metal sculpted into ramps and tunnels and pulleys until it’s caused a cascade of reactions. It takes a solid three minutes before it nears the end and Peter can only wait with baited breath and the whole mechanism comes to a valiant conclusion and the last piece slams into the hammer and…

The hammer doesn’t move. 

Sam doesn’t even bother hiding his laugh. “Better luck next time, spider-kid.” 

Clint shrugs. “It was a good effort.” 

In science, it’s not uncommon for things not to work. Peter’s had his fair share of exploding inventions, spider webs in his face, and code that doesn’t run. It still doesn’t prepare him for the crushing disappointment that he feels upon seeing that magic hammer still sitting on a box of poptarts that he so desperately wants to free.

At this point, it’s not even about the food anymore. Peter’s too invested to not see this through some way or another. 

So he starts building and tries it again. And again. And again. 

By the time night had fallen and the starts were covered by light pollution in the heart of New York, Peter’s no closer to those poptarts than he was during the early afternoon. The rest of the Avengers had lost interest at this point—content to longue around the lobby with a movie playing in the background and an ear peeled just to make sure Peter hasn’t accidently injured himself yet. 

Eventually, Mr. Stark wanders back into the room and knocks on the wall. When Peter looks up, Mr. Stark says, “Alright, Underoors, it’s bed time.” 

“But I’m not done,” Peter says. “I’m so close, Mr. Stark!”

Mr. Stark takes in the scattered pieces of junk and the hammer still sitting atop the poptart box, unscaved and unmoved. “Uh huh. Right. Well, I’m sure it will still be there next time you stop by but it’s a school night and I don’t want to face your aunt’s wrath if I bring you home too late.” 

“But…” 

“I am sure you can thwart the poptart box some other time,” Mr. Stark says which is really just the tipping point for this entire situation. 

By the end of it, Peter’s so frustrated the he goes to yank the poptart box out from under the hammer itself, damned if the poptarts get crushed, ripped, or otherwise destroyed in the process. He puts one hand on the hammer and one hand on the box and just pulls.

It’s not the poptart box that comes loose. 

There’s a hammer in his hand that hadn’t been there before, lightweight in a way that made Peter think he had been holding a piece of paper and not an extremely destructive magic weapon. The room around him goes so quiet that a pen could be dropped and the echo would be heard all the way down the hall. 

“Oh,” Peter says. “Huh.” 

“He did not just do that,” Sam says. “Please tell me the fourteen year old did not just do that.”

Peter pivots on his heel and points the hammer at him. “I’m sixteen.” 

The rest of the Avengers are looking at him in a way that Peter can’t quite really describe in a totality. Dr. Banner has a hand over his mouth, Clint’s jaw is about as close to the ground as it can be, Ms. Nat looks somewhat amused but there’s something else there—Peter’s not fantastic at reading expressions and even less fantastic when it’s reading expressions of a superspy so he doesn’t even try there. Mr. Stark looks a bit more exasperated than surprised but it’s that exasperation when you think your kid can’t do something and are pleasantly surprised to see them succeed. Mr. Steve is standing, white-knuckled grip on the couch’s arm and eyes wide in an expression of shock that Peter’s never really seen on him before.

Peter’s surprised the Avengers a handful of times but he thinks, with the hammer in his hands and the poptart box freed, that this is situation is the best. 

“I think,” Mr. Stark says in the same tone voice he always has when he’s trying to take control of a situation where he has very little control in. “That we need Thor. Right now.” 

[kyber-crystal]

Be Careful

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Words: ~2.7k

Summary: You patch up an injured Captain after he comes back from a rather rough mission late at night.

Warnings: mentions of blood, violence, soft steve, cocky steve :)

A/N: this was one of my older oneshots...so it sucks

"Thor, it's 3 in the morning. Why are you trying to cook Pop-Tarts in the toaster at this ungodly hour?"

"My apologies, Lady Y/N. I did not mean to wake you," the Norse god gave you an innocent smile. "I heard toaster Pop-Tarts are quite delicious, so I decided to try my hand at making some myself."

"No no, it's fine," you waved him off, "I've been awake for a while, anyways. You can just carry on if you want, but try not to blow anything up, alright?"

"Yes, ma'am."

You'd been waiting for Steve to return from his solo mission, and currently, you, Thor, and Sam were the only ones awake in the compound. Not wanting to fall asleep without knowing if he was alright and returned in one piece, you were planning to stay up for as long as necessary. Fatigue was tugging at your eyes for a while now, but you couldn't care less. You'd handled worse things than sleep deprivation.

Just as the Pop-Tarts finished cooking and Thor took them to his room to eat as he watched Gossip Girl by himself on his MacBook, you decided to watch TV to fill the silence that had settled in around the lounge.

Around half an hour later you heard the elevator doors slide open, revealing an exhausted-looking Steve Rogers. His face was streaked with dust and debris, dried blood sticking to his dirty-blonde hair and a tired look in his icy-blue eyes, but you still thought he looked perfect regardless.

"Hey," you greeted him as he stepped forward, setting his duffel bag off to the side.

"I made it," he exhaled, "it was a bit of a pain trying to escape, but other than that, it ran pretty smoothly."

"That's good," you nodded. He inhaled deeply as he sat down at the edge of the couch.

It was only until you looked down and saw he was clutching his side that you realized he'd been severely injured.

"Shit shit shit shit, Rogers, what the hell happened," you muttered frantically as you tried to pull him into a more upright position to examine his wound. "Who hurt you?"

"HYDRA. And language," he croaked out, laughing lightly before being overcome by a coughing fit, wincing in pain. "Ow, that hurt. But I'm fine."

"No, you're not fine!" you whisper-shouted. Blood was seeping through his uniform and gushing out of his wound at an alarming pace. "You think you can stand and walk for a bit? I need to get you down to the lab to treat your wound. Bruce is asleep so I can't get him."

"Maybe?"

You let out a sigh of disbelief, slinging an arm across his shoulders and helping him down the hall to the lab, sitting him down in a chair you pulled up next to the examination table. You quickly grabbed all the necessary medical supplies and set them down next to him.

Steve took his hand off his stomach and you tried not to faint at the sight of it coming away covered in blood, making bile rise up in your throat.

"That bad, huh," he joked, but grimaced when he tried to move slightly.

"Stop moving!" you scolded as you came forward, "you're gonna make it worse if you do! I need to take the bullet out, so don't move."

"I'm fine," he reassured you.

"No, you're not. Now shut up and stay still."

"What's with the hesitation?"

"Um...you need to...remove your suit..." you spluttered.

A smirk came across Steve's face. "Sure."

"Not here!" you raised your voice. "You know what...just...take off the top...part..so I can get to your wound easily..."

"If you wanted a piece of this, you could've just asked," he grinned cheekily.

"Shut up!" you squeaked. "Just...take it off."

You sucked in a breath as he slid the top part of his suit off, revealing his toned shoulders and torso.

"I'm sorry for making you all flustered."

"Shut! Up!" you whisper-shouted as you began to treat his wound, flinching at the spark you felt running up your body when your skin came in contact with his during the process. "I'm not flustered!"

You almost cringed as he hissed in pain when the metal tweezers came in contact with his skin, trying to keep your fingers from shaking as you removed the bullet. "Sorry, sorry, sorry, this'll only take another minute..."

Letting out a breath of relief you didn't know you'd been holding inside, you dropped the bullet onto a tray off to your side and wiped your hands before grabbing the thick roll of bandages to wrap up his wound.

"There," you dusted off your hands, "it's over. I'm gonna clean up your face now, and then you're going to not overwork yourself by not sparring four hours a day for the next week."

"Y/N..."

"Listen to me, Steve. You aren't gonna get better if you keep overworking yourself, so you're gonna do as I say and rest."

"Aye aye, Captain," he mock saluted you.

"Now," you sighed, "if you aren't tired, I can go make us some coffee if you want."

"That sounds nice," the super-soldier agreed.

"Try standing up on your own now," you said, "if you can't I'll help you over there."

"Y/N, I'm fine," he reassured you as he gripped the edge of the table and stood up, "see? Stop worrying. I can handle myself perfectly well."

You sighed again. "Alright, fine. Let's go, then. Get changed first, then meet me in the lounge once you're done."

You headed to the kitchen and as he sat down at the couch, now changed into a soft white T-shirt and grey sweats, you plugged in the coffee maker and got out the pods from the pantry. Hopefully, Tony wouldn't mind you using a few of them.

God, you really needed to stop staring at him so much.

But it's not my fault he wears tight shirts all the time! another voice yelled back inside your head.

"You okay, Y/N? You look kinda pale," Steve commented as he looked back to see your now-pale face.

"Yes, what, huh?" you blinked several times, shaking your head and snapping out of your momentary daze. "Yeah, I'm okay. You want your coffee black, or with milk?"

"Black," he replied simply, rubbing his forehead and yawning, stretching his arms up in the air.

You poured the coffee into two separate mugs once they were ready, putting milk in one and handing one over to Steve before taking a seat next to him on the sofa. "Now, will you tell me how the hell you got hit? I should know that, at least."

"Caught in the crossfire," Steve replied simply. "Got unlucky, and took a hit, right as I was getting the data files downloaded."

"Sounds like a repeat of Montpellier," you raised an eyebrow at him in suspicion, "except that time, it was me."

"Trouble always seems to find us, huh," he hummed, taking a sip of his drink.

"When I was the one to get hit, I knew what I was getting myself into. I jumped in front of Peter to take a bullet meant for him. You, on the other hand, decided to just jump into the fight without looking at the possible outcomes."

"Wow, sounds like you actually care about the great Captain," he smirked. "Thought you had no heart."

"You're funny. I'm not completely heartless, you know. I care about people."

"Well, well, well, look what we have here," you heard someone clap slowly from behind you and when you turned around, there stood a rather smug-looking Pietro. "Heartless warrior and Cap finally getting some action. Nice."

"Since when were you awake? I thought you were sleeping," you were now confused.

"I was playing against Sam in Mario Kart this entire time. I think that's a solid enough reason to stay up," the speedster explained. "Steve, when'd you get back?"

"Fifteen minutes ago."

"You didn't die?"

"I'm here right now, so no."

"Oh, Y/N, when you were patching him up did you get to see his abs? He's totally ripped, you know, I hope you didn't get too carried away staring—"

"Pietro!" you snapped, cheeks going bright red, much to his amusement. "Really?"

"What? I'm curious!"

"I had no choice but to see!"

"You make it sound like you didn't enjoy it."

Steve chuckled as your cheeks grew an even deeper shade of scarlet. You groaned loudly, gulping down your coffee in just three more large gulps to save yourself from having to reply to his comment.

“Okay, Speedy, I’ve had it with your comments, now shoo,” you waved a hand at him. “Go to bed.”

“Need I remind you I’m no longer a teenager and I don’t have a bedtime,” he scoffed before walking away. “Also, ship it!”

You sighed and let your head fall into your hands. 

After several more minutes of the strained silence, Steve cleared his throat. “Thanks for fixing me up back there. I would’ve bled out if it weren’t for you.”

“That’s not reassuring at all,” you mumbled into your hands. 

He chuckled again. “I’m sorry. I’ll try not to get shot next time.”

You lifted your head to glance up at him. “You said that when Fury sent us on that mission to Montenegro and I had to drag you back to the jet because you got shot, twice. And I did it with a concussion, dislocated shoulder, and a severely sprained ankle. Wanda brought me breakfast in bed for four days after that.”

“You’re making me sound a lot heavier than I really am.”

“Yeah, you outweigh me by sixty pounds at least. Of course you’re gonna feel heavy to me.”

“I thought you could bench press 300? That’s over twice your weight.”

“That’s not an actual human being.”

“I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that someone like you who’s so light can lift so much.”

“I’m lightweight?”

“Compared to 300, or in my case, 180, then yes. But hey, most of that’s muscle,” he winked at you, rolling his sleeve up slightly and flexing his bicep. “So how’s the view, Y/N?”

You rolled your eyes. “Showoff.”

“You love me.”

“That’s debatable.”

“Seriously, though...” Steve’s voice softened, as did his gaze on you, “thank you.”

“...For?”

“For staying up late to wait for me, even though you don’t like doing so. It’s nice to have someone to look forward to when I’m coming back home.”

“I never said I didn’t like staying up.”

“Y/N, I know you like the back of my hand,” the corners of his mouth turned up in a small grin, “I’m pretty sure I know you better than you know yourself.”

“Bet. What’s my favorite color?”

“That’s easy. It’s blue. But like you consistently remind everyone who asks, it’s not just plain blue. It’s the blue only found in the deepest corners of the ocean that are furthest from the shore. You had the highlights of your suit changed from grey to this shade, after Fury forced us on that vacation to Sicily and you refused to leave the beach because you’d fallen so in love with gazing at the horizon. When we returned, Clint kept teasing us because it looked like we were trying to coordinate our stealth suits with one another.”

You were shocked and taken aback, not expecting for him to memorize what you’d told him word for word. “Okay...what’s my biggest fear?”

“Failure. Failing to protect those you love, failing to succeed in your job as an Avenger,” he said softly, “Ever since Phil gave word of your parents’ passing four years ago, you grew extremely overprotective over what family you had left, which happened to be the team. You refused to let your mission partners out of your sight and if they did, forced them to stay on call at all times. You couldn’t afford to have whatever happened to your parents happen to your teammates, because bearing that burden would be too much for you to handle.”

You swallowed hard, blinking back tears. “Yeah...um. What was my job before joining the initiative, and what made me join the team in the first place?”

“A brilliant student, you graduated two years early to become a trauma surgeon for the next four years. At first, you were reluctant to accept Fury’s offer because you’d dedicated your life saving people instead of doing the opposite. Violence was the very last thing on your mind so the Battle of New York was rather difficult for you to cope with after it ended. Continuing to be able to save people in your new line of work and seeing thousands more look up to you was what pushed you to keep going; you didn’t want to let them all down.

He laughed to himself, recalling the memory. “I didn’t expect you to be so relentless on the battlefield. You never told any of us you were also training under SHIELD at the same time you were going through med school, so Nat and I were blown away when we saw you fight. I’m pretty sure Clint fainted when he saw you shoot out electricity bolts. Thor was insistent on seeing if you could lift Mjolnir afterwards.”

“I offered to be SHIELD’s lab rat because nobody else was willing to step up, so here I am,” you chuckled lightly, “those powers ended up coming in handy in the operating room sometimes...during emergency surgeries.”

“You’re amazing,” Steve exhaled. “I can see why so many people look up to you as a role model.”

You laughed awkwardly, rubbing the back of your neck. “I’m not that special.”

“You are. You’ve impacted millions of lives, Y/N. The world owes you a debt.”

“You know me so well, Captain. I’m surprised you remember the little details...Tony sometimes forgets my birthday and here you are, listing off every little thing easily.”

“I’m just observant, that’s all...” he hummed, a ghost of a smile on his face. 

“If you answer this question right, then you’ve won it all,” you challenged. “What’s my opinion on finding love?”

“You always claim to be opposed to falling in love, but I know you better than that,” he explained. “You’ve only started showing the signs of being in love a few months ago, but your heart was stolen many years prior by one man.”

Was it just you, or did Steve look almost...hurt as he spoke?

“Who’s that one man?”

“You’re asking me?” he raised an eyebrow at you, shifting slightly into a more comfortable position that wouldn’t put too much pressure on his abdomen. “How would I know that?”

“Because you know me better than anyone else in the compound,” you stated. 

“Why don’t you describe him for me, then.”

“For starters, he’s extremely loyal. Always sticks by your side and will stay loyal to you until the very end of his days.”

“Sam?”

“No. I’m not finished,” you held up a finger to interrupt him. “He’s a great leader and the slightest bit cocky, but he’s got a great sense of humor and at the same time, he can be very serious. He always knows how to make you feel better even when you’re in the worst mood, and gives the best hugs known to man. My favorite color isn’t just because of the ocean, but his eyes...I think that’s what made me start loving blue in the first place.”

Your eyes widened and you immediately shut your mouth, realizing you’d gone off on a mini tangent. Steve didn’t look all that surprised, but rather amused. 

“You’re in love with me?” A smirk tugged at the corners of his lips. 

“Don’t let it get to your head, Rogers,” you muttered.

“If you’re in love with me, then that’s good because I’m in love with you too.”

Now it was time to be taken aback a second time. “W-what?”

“You heard me right.”

“I think the medication I gave you is making you a bit too loopy.”

“I’m being honest. This is the real me talking here, Y/N.”

A red light going off in the corner of the ceiling made you both look up and groan. 

“Well done for finally fessing up, kiddies?" Tony’s smug voice came over the intercom. “When’s the wedding?”

You flipped off the camera before standing up and walking away. Steve just shook his head and chuckled.