#freak in question -> hisoka

[movedto-mrs-bluemarine]

Actually I love looooveee the character designs in HxH. It's all so good. There's so much personality in each design alone. Unfortunately they gave the biggest fucking freak one of the best ones (pic unrelated)

[0asisbliss]

Pretty pretty please with sugar on top, could we maybe perchance get some headcanons for the vampire phantom troupe biting reader for the first time?? Since doing all of them would be a lot maybe just Chrollo, Machi, Pakunoda, Feitan, and Shalnark please? Also just as a side question for future requests, do you consider Illumi and Hisoka part of the troupe?

A/N: Hiii anon! I do consider Illumi and hisoka a part of the troupe, but I don’t really write much for Hisoka. So his is less likely to be answered than others. Though you all are free to request him!

Other note: Also, the characters won’t automatically turn you when bitten.🤷🏽‍♀️

Warnings: Mentions if sex, oral, Shalnark is freak.

Chrollo:

Chrollo doesn't sneak nor does he just up and grab a hold of you a take a bite.

First of off all for Chrollo to bite someone he has to have strong feelings for such person for him to even consider biting them.

He really observes the way you act once he finally bites down on your skin.

Once he does it the first time he’ll continuously do it

It was already known that you were going to be turned into a vampire like him at some point.

The reason being Chrollo knows how fast a humans like can go by. He’s had continuous human lovers and has had his little cold heart broken plenty times.

The first time he bites you, oh he’s serious and he means business. Straight down. No soft nibbles, or licks just full teeth.

This doesn’t mean he loves you any less though.

He does patch up the wound, and cleans it as a little sorry if you are upset.

Pakunoda:

She’s sneaky with it definitely.

You’ll be all relaxed in the bathtub, and just lathered up in the finest smelling soaps, and chomp.

And the bite doesn’t even hurt as bad. I mean it’s so soft you just look at her, and then she looks at you with big puppy eyes almost like she’s apologizing.

You laugh it off, and she does too.

Over time she gets more and more comfortable with biting you.

But for the first time in forever she bites you for real it surprises you.

She finally drew blood. Once this happens and she gets a slightest taste of you be prepared to get bitten at least a couple times a day.

Though if she turns you then she’ll show you all of the places to get a yummy little snack.

Gives a little kiss on the marking afterwards.

Machi:

She’s shy.

She’s the only one in this list that’ll ask you before she starts to nibble.

You two would be eating dinner and she would randomly start mumbling about how nice it would be.

Then she finally asks, but it’s a mumble more than anything you barely hear her.

It when she goes quiet and say it again then she speaks about it.

I completely understand if you don’t want to-

Then you cut her off saying about how much you wanted her to do it anyway.

Also, she wouldn’t do it right away.

Once you two are cuddled up, or even when you’re sleeping is when she makes her move.

Machi is the only one that doesn’t plan on turning you, so she won’t actually go deep just a little nibble.

Shalnark:

He doesn’t even ask. He just does it.

He would be fucking your brains out and bite the shit out of you out of nowhere.

It’s not a slow bite but a big and sharp one.

He has the 5th sharpest teeth in the troupe. Chrollo being first, and Feitan being fourth.

He's mean about it too. Always teasing you about his markings.

No matter if they are big or small.

It's almost certain that he'll turn you, and when he does the biting doesn't stop there.

The biting further increases if anything, flooding your body with bruises also may occur when you're still in your human form.

He and Chrollo are the most passionate about turning you on this list.

While eating you, he might just bite you then. (He has a biting kink)

He'll lick where he bite you every time to gather every little flavor.

Feitan:

His bite is purposely harsh.

No warning, no context, just chomp.

He won't turn you within the couple weeks he's done it like the other have mainly because of the fact that he enjoys you being human.

Feitan is the only one in the Troupe that considers having you be a human way more than you being a vamp like him.

Humans bruise easily. Adorable. Humans make the cutest little expressions when seeing blood. Adorable. Humans make the prettiest little noises when hurt. Adorable.

His bite may also be fatal.

Feitan really has forgotten how fragile humans are, but he'll soon find out when you are bleeding from a wound and it doesn't stop.

And then he will have no choice but to turn you.

[hxhhasmysoul]

HOT TAKE : I dont understand why Chrollo is so damn popular. He is so boring to me. So yes, they have a fucked up childhood, yes he cares about his members, and yes he has identity crisis or something but still, he is so freaking boring. Maybe I just dont understand how he is one of the most complex villains to ever exist and how he is so deep etc etc.

Same with kurapika. I dont understand why its an unpopular opinion that he is a bad friend when it is evidently shown in the manga . Also his situation is very black and white. Its boring. Nothing much changed from him tbh.

Sorry it took me so long to answer your ask but you came to the right blog with these questions, you’ll find my understanding and support.

I also don’t get Chrollo’s popularity at all. Especially prior to the recent chapters.

I agree with you that he’s boring. His whole persona feels very fake, very rehearsed, like he practised edginess in front of the mirror. His words to Kurapika that other Spiders won’t try to save him felt to me so fake, especially how everything in that conversation was him trying to yank Kurapika’s chain (sorry for a bad pun XD). 

Even his mourning of Uvo feels like a performance. Like sure, I’m not denying he’s sad at that moment but he’s still very much in control of himself and performs the requiem. Even gets himself a captive audience to take a little edge off how shallow and silly his behaviour is. We see him truly affected after Hisoka kills Shalnark and Korotopi. After Chrollo fails to kill Hisoka despite pulling every dirty trick he could and his friends lose their lives as a direct result because he left them powerless. Before that we don’t even see him grieve Pakunoda. 

It all makes sense of course. Chrollo is a theatre kid as we learned recently. He really just took that theatre shit and made it his personality.

And that's boring because he’s a bad actor. He can trick a sheltered teenager, he can provoke an already unstable victim of his crimes. His little cult worships him. But people who look at him from the outside and have life experience like Zeno instantly see through him. 

Even Killua comments on how Chrollo just produces words with his mouth and they mean nothing. It’s such an amazing fourth wall break because it’s Togashi literally pointing at Chrollo and telling the audience this man is full of nothing but hot air. The way Chrollo speaks often feels like he read some deep sounding line in a book and he’s repeating it to wow the audience.

It is all very cult leader charm, you need to be primed for it to affect you properly. For me it’s boring and grating at times. Especially when we see him contrasted with almost all the other characters in the York New arc. We see the vivid connections the spiders have among them, how their levels of connection differ, how they have different attitudes to one another. It’s full of life and personality. And Chrollo there above them, always remaining above the fray, always performing his persona… he’s just such a nothing burger compared to that. 

Because there’s no pizzazz in his performance, no sprezzatura. It’s just fakedeep edgy boi acting like a throwaway cult leader while performatively denying he’s one… 

Chrollo’s kinda cutesy backstory doesn’t really make me care more about him. It just kind of highlights how fake he feels as an adult.

Why do fans like him? My uncharitable and biased guess is that they consider him hot and they like the edgy bad boi performance and just pour their desires of what they want Chrollo to be into that that vacuous husk.

As to Kurapika. Yeah, Kurapika is a bad friend and I have written it down here, I don’t have much to add to it.

Apart from that Togashi muddying the waters on the Kurta genocide makes things worse. It makes his whole narrative treatment of the genocide topic even worse than it’s been so far.

It may turn out that the Kurta did something horrible. And then the Phantom Troupe fans will use that as an excuse to whitewash the Spiders, even if one horrible act by a member or members of a group will never justify a genocide because nothing ever will. 

Even if it turns out that the Kurta did nothing to horrible, the seed of doubt is already there and the door to speculation whether their genocide was justified has been opened. 

And it also allows Phantom Troupe fans to skirt all the other murder that their favs have committed.

[animeyanderetalker]

Continuing from a similar question I posted to you, who are the three Hunter x Hunter characters who you think would generally work the best with a yandere s/o? Assuming said s/o is mutually yandere towards said character, of course.

Hisoka is the first who would come to mind because it would be like finding someone who matches your freak. It's going to be so toxic though because with someone who is also obsessed with him he would probably constantly make his s/o jealous only to take pleasure in his s/o killing said person only to experience the same when his darling returns that energy.

Illumi could be a candidate though it depends on how his darling would behave. If his darling is mainly clingy and obsessed it would work better than someone who is too active which would bother Illumi since he views himself as the provider and the one who controls everything.

Pariston is someone who I haven't talked a lot about yet but honestly, he would be a pretty good candidate for this question too. He is after all someone who treats danger and threats like mere games and loves playing around which is going to make for quite a twisted and unpredictable play he is going to have with a darling who is also obsessed with him.

[whoopsieintheuniverse]

Getting..."Elevated"...with the Phantom Troupe

CW: dr00g use, "leaf", the phantom troupe, chrollo, MDNI

this was so funny to make and ngl i have been ruminating on it for 3 days. all of this is canon to ME

Chrollo - Philosopher smoker. No surprise there. What is surprising is that he does not entertain deeper questions while stoned. They freak him out. Instead, he focuses on more "shower thoughts" like thinking. "How do we know blue is blue?" "Do pufferfish know that they can puff?" Please give him an answer, he will not be satisfied until he receives one.

Feitan - PROCEED WITH CAUTION. Feitan has strands that no one has ever seen before, and they sound dangerous. He smokes stuff like "Heartstopper" and "Trainwreck" and lets people smoke with him without letting them know that they are in for a ride. Phinks has been a victim of Fei's favorite: "Double Homicide." Everyone is convinced that that particular one might be laced with something harder.

Phinks - Munchies, munchies, and more munchies. He is hungry when he's high. Edibles make his head hurt, but Phinks can and will out-smoke you. The only problem is he will smoke at any time when offered, no questions asked... which gets him in trouble sometimes. ((Feitan...))

Machi - No thanks. She doesn't smoke anything other than cigarettes. Machi is a pretty okay trip sitter for the most part, as long as you don't start freaking out. Then, you're on your own. ((Looking at you Nobunaga))

Franklin - Sleeper. Takes nap after nap until the weed is out of his system. He doesn't really care about strain or type because he's out like a light regardless. Prefers edibles if he wants to have a good time or stay up a bit longer, and often smokes to sleep.

Nobunaga - Bless him. He overestimated himself one time with Feitan and Phinks. Greened out something fierce. Hates it now. Is the best trip sitter, however. He's cheerful and willing to do whatever, especially if you're too zoned out to focus on much.

Uvogin - Uvo can never get his doses right. He either greens out or doesn't get anything out of it at all. He will sometimes get a little lucky with edibles, but honestly, he prefers to trip sit. Likes watching people freak out a bit.

Bonolenov - Bonolenov is familiar with weed, bit doesn't partake himself. Likens it to an herb his tribe ate after a successful battle. Trip sitter by chance but will not realize if you're greened out.

Pakunoda - Will relax with a little teeny tiny bby joint but will not overdo it. Only does indica, she's a lady, dammit.

Shizuku - Shizuku can and will finish the blunt because she forgets to pass all. the. time. Nightmare to have in rotation. She and Phinks always walk away with the lighters too.

Shalnark - Opposite of Pakunoda. Only does Sativa. Has a habit of getting stoned and finishing games, only to not remember a lick of it when he sobers up.

Hisoka* - Surprisingly, he is the most chill about it. Does not smoke often, but when he does, he is usually in one of his rooms in the Heavens Arena. Uses a bong, and it stays clean. Tried to smoke with Illumi... and it is one of his few regrets.

Illumi* - Did not and does not see the point. To stop Hisoka from whining one day, Illumi indulged. Smoked up all the clown's stock and said he didn't feel anything, but the way he ate Hisoka out of house and home begged to differ. c

[mayxo-hxh]

extremely specific queer hisoillu ramblings & hcs. question prompt was: How and when do you think Hisoillu found out they were queer?

i worked around the demi hc so for both of them.

For Hisoka I think it was obvious to him that he wasnt even close to cis and he knew he wouldve felt more comfortable generally being perceived as a man instead of a woman (i hc him transmasc) most of the time despite liking feminine stuff anyways.

TW FOR TRANSPHOBIA:

i do think kid hisoka, who very much first presented as a lil guy before his chest grew out, had heard multiple slurs thrown at him and was definitely physically and mentally abused for liking "feminine things" when he looked like a boy. and for the very short period of time where he grew a chest and saw the fact that his chest suddenly had him being called a girl no matter what.

its when it clicked with him that "normal" societal cis standards are absolute fucking bullshit and that hes gonna be whatever he fucking wanted. He actually didn't care about having a chest until they grew to their full size and he just naturally grew to dislike /always/ having them yknow. if he had the option to take them on and off when he felt like it, he'd go for it. (hehe. bungee boobs after top surgery)

That was for his trans realization. For his sexuality, well. I think he just thought he never liked people in the first place so sexuality was something he was extremely indifferent to. He saw ppl in love and heard of what they do when theyre in love and he was like. "yeah absolutely fucking not thats not for me. not even close" and the thought of sex just disgusted him because he can never imagine being this intimate with some random person (considering he literally had 0 people in his life that were even considered friends until illumi) i think its obvious. who his awakening was lmfao

illumis was basically, he knew he did not conform to cis standards and that was that. he didnt rlly think of any labels or any possibilities, he just did not give a fuck whether he was called this or that and knew he sometimes wished he was. neither. nothing at all. and his parents had no restrictions on his representation when he started to branch out and discover what he liked to present as (after his short hair teen days)

TW FOR ARO/ACEPHOBIA (probably)

mw for sexuality. same thing as hisoka basically. he knew he was gonna "have to" marry someone someday because this was the "normal" and what his parents expected but he just felt 0 attraction to anyone and everyone around him. he had a period where he thought it was normal to not feel attraction and people just put up with each other for the sake of either procreation or not living alone, then he thought he was broken because he realized akshually his parents DO love each other very much and hes the "abnormal" one.

unfortunately i dont think hes the type to realize that whatever he had going on for him was normal and completely fine, he was just extremely relieved when he realized he wasn't "broken" when he felt attracted to hisoka. but it probably took him a while to realize it was actual. yknow. that type of attraction. especially since illumi probably never formed any connections to anyone outside his family so when he did start feeling stuff with hisoka it was probably first brushed off as well. oh maybe this is normal when ure friends with someone haha. no illumi not in your case at least

basically in terms of sexuality, theyre the same but perceived their situation in complete opposite ways. Hisoka was completely fine with the thought of being alone but it freaked Illumi out 😭

[mylittlesecrethaven]

That Episode Was... Something...

Season 1 episode 8 of One Punch Man was great.

Main reason?

This freak.

AND OF COURSE he's voiced by Hisoka's English voice actor.

Like this doesn't look and act like a fish version of Hisoka.

Man's got heart nipples.

And the other dude? The prison dude who's name I can't remember? He was something else, too. He was definitely.... something.

I liked the episode though. It was chaotic and random and made me question why I watched it. Amazing. 8/10

(Bet you didn't think you'd see that image. I didn't either when I was checking my queue)

[vroomian]

Have you considered a hunterxhunter au where yrz is born into the zoldyck family with white hair? if not, feel free to ignore this, but the thought of yrz being born into a family of psycho assassins all obsessed with him bc of his hair colour (bc white hair = heir? ive been reading fic) and not helped by his work ethic bc he would def end up op, is just too funny to me. (And then killua is born and yrz takes off like an energizer bunny bc, distraction!! from him!! quick! run!)

I can safely say that no I have not considered this incredibly specific au lol. Well Yrz raised by an Assassins family would be both screwed up And terrifying. Morals? Throw em out! He’s definitely not sticking around for long tho.

[cat3ch1sm]

could u possibly write the hxh adult trio’s reaction to y/n getting a bit too drunk after being out with them on a special occasion. for illumi/hisoka, they could be celebrating a successful mission with drinks, or hisoka being hisoka, simply wanting to get y/n tipsy enough to figure out just what is going on in her head😏. but yeah how would they reacttt, would they take her back to their room, take care of her, let her spend the night? let your imagination decideee💕

💚| as you wish💚 this is kinda a mix of messy scenarios and headcanons!!! enjoy and ilyy<33

hisoka

༊* mf was definitely looking to get u drunk

༊* you guys probably were crashing another person's party tbh 😭 hisoka isn't a special occasion person himself, so he doesn't really 'celebrate' things. but he's a huge fan of dressing up like a stripper to someone else's celebration, so off you guys went💀💀

"Y/N, you look a bit disoriented. Perhaps I shouldn't have let you drink so much..." Hisoka mused, although he didn't seem very displeased. His nails dug into your waist as your weight rested on his side, you stumbling ahead while he supported you. "Although, admittedly, it is exciting to see you this way...tsk...you're always too composed..." He pushed the door to his apartment open with his free arm, essentially carrying you inside, and you only responded with a weak groan.

Hisoka released you and allowed you to stagger over to the bed while he stood in the doorway, the door swinging shut behind him. He seemed to be either observing you or wondering whether to stay with you or simply abandon you in his own bed. After a few minutes of silence except for your moving in the bed, Hisoka finally opted to stay and moved towards you, his heels clicking as he walked.

༊* you're surprised he stays- but don't get to comfortable. he's probably only staying to ask you questions you normally wouldn't answer when sober

༊* 100 percent would not be surprised if he avoided alcohol himself all night just to interrogate you.

༊* actually, though, hisoka doesn't suck at tending to you while intoxicated. he might cover you with the blankets or provide you with some water, but of course he has his own reasons for doing it (or so he tells himself)

༊* chances are, if hisoka is actually not looking to get answers from you and not being selfish, he'll wait until you fall asleep before taking off somewhere. if you're really lucky, he'll stay and help you with the awful hangover you'll definitely have in the morning

"Regretting last night's decisions, Y/N?"

Hisoka was propped up in the doorway, fully dressed and fiddling with his jewelry as he observed your doubled-over figure with an unconcerned smirk.

You rolled over and pulled a pillow over your ears with an exaggerated groan. "Shut the hell up."

chrollo

༊* you were probably out just for a special night. chrollo isn't a fan of fast food or cheap, generic stuff like that. so just to change the mood, chrollo took you to this fancy bar instead

༊* he's actually just a bit freaked out when he sees how drunk you are, and he begins to wonder if he made the right call taking you out tonight. but then he starts to wonder if someone did something to your drink...

"Y/N? Oh, dear-" You stumbled and tripped, Chrollo catching you just before you hit the ground as he helped you into your apartment. "I knew I should have made you stop after that last drink..." He shook his head as if displeased with his own incompetence, walking you over to your bed and laying your body down gently. "Stay there for a bit while I run out and get you some cold water and aspirin."

༊* doesn't take you to his apartment for fear of accidentally getting into something with you

༊* he'd definitely feel like a weirdo if you initiated intimacy while drunk

You offered only a muffled moan in reply, burying your face into your pillow, your stomach aching. Chrollo smiled pitifully at you before slipping out the door, mouthing, "I'll be right back."

He arrived back within ten to fifteen minutes, a chilled water bottle in one hand and a bottle of pills in the other- but even through your drunk haze, you could see that he was covered in blood, the wine red color splattered all across his dapper suit. Chrollo didn't even seem to notice the mess as he rushed over to you and placed both items beside you on the bed as you peered up at him in confusion. But you were too out of it to ask, and Chrollo seemed to know that.

"Sleep well, Y/N. I'll explain this tomorrow- alright?"

༊* in the morning, though, chrollo is nowhere to be found. however, beside you on your nightstand, you see a single, partially dissolved white capsule.

illumi

༊* Illumi probably just wanted to have a regular conversation (or about as regular as a conversation can get with Illumi) over drinks. he's not much of a "go out and celebrate" person either. it's just like, he did something, who cares.

"You don't look very well, Y/N," Illumi noted without a hint of sympathy in his voice as he lowered you into your bed, his expression stoic. "However, I'm afraid I won't be much help- I'm sure you're aware that I am incapable of getting intoxicated. So if you need anything specific, you're going to have to let me know."

Your answer was only a fatigued sigh. Illumi blinked at you expectantly, unamused and straight-faced as he replied: "That is not an answer."

༊* illumi has no idea how to take care of you. it's pretty likely he'll just wind up leaving after you go to sleep- but don't be surprised if he just walks out while you're still up.

༊* if he doesn't know how to respond to a situation, he just walks out, pretty much

[animeyanderelover]

Genuinely curious abt this; Gon with a Darling concerned but also afraid of him. Basically they have conflicted feelings for him; they always viewed him as this sweet innocent ray of sunshine capable of no wrong, he always has this sense of justice that Reader admired. They followed him on his journey to find his Father in the Hunter Exams, all the way to Chimera Arc.

That was a big turning point there. Reader noticed the signs througout their journey but they were confused. And then they saw how Gon reacted to Kite's death, they tried their best to console him. But with how Gon mercilessly plummeted Pitou to nothing, Reader's image of Gon is put to question and now they have no idea how to act or feel around him. Their responses were shorter, unsure, a bit distant and avoidant but they're also not sure whether to pull away or stay.

How would Gon reassure them?

That arc changed my view on Gon too. I guess it changed many opinions about Gon.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, clinginess, delusions, obsession, violence

Should I leave or stay?

🎣​You two basically grew up together and have been inseparable as long as you can remember. You two are are childhood sweethearts. Gon just has something that you've always admired. He's optimistic, always cheers you up when you're done and has a strong sense of justice. He's already told you about his dream to go to the Hunter Exam and find his father and you've been nothing but supportive, have already sworn to go together with him. That led to a pinky promise you two made on that day, promising to go through everything together. Gon's crush on you is fairly obvious but the whole village watches with smiles since the both of you are too adorable together. Who knows, your admiration and all the years you spent with him might have led to a crush from your side too.

🎣​You make great friends on the way, feel really happy in the beginning since it feels like nothing could ever get in your and Gon's way now. You have great people like Leorio, Kurapika and Killua with you after all. Hisoka marks the first real confrontation with the more evil aspects of the world as he has an interest in Gon and you, sees you as something that has potential. He freaks you out and Gon notices, reacts very protective as he always tries to shield you as soon as Hisoka notices your group.

🎣​Many things happen and the grim reality which was kept away from you on the isolated island starts dawning on you more and more. There are times where you feel down but Gon and your new friends encourage you and are there for you which is why you're always able to stay up. You help to save Killua from his family, fight your way through the arena and learn together with Gon and Killua Nen. You even manage to survive the Phanom Troupe somehow thanks to Gon and your own abilities which you unlocked thanks to your Nen. Bisky only helps you more to unlock your true Nen-potential as you work on your own special move fitting for you and your type.

🎣​You admire Kite and you know Gon does the same. He's finally a close lead to his father and a great teacher to top it all. Both of you look up to him and in your own naivety you genuinely think that after surviving the Phantom Troupe there is nothing you can't handle. That is until the Chimera Ants appear and Neferpitou attacks. The aura they project has your whole body trembling as you feel something that can only be described as the certain knowledge that you'll die here. Only thanks to Kite fighting and screaming you to run away and Killua grabbing both you and Gon, who wants to help Kite, are you able to survive.

🎣​It's the first time you've seen Gon being shattered as he turns into a shell of what he used to be for a while after. Your heart aches and you try to console him and cheer him up as good as you can. He's done so much for you already so you can at least do something for him too. Initially you're too blinded to notice what starts to brood inside of him. Or maybe you just try to ignore the signs he sometimes gives you such as the flare of negative aura or the empty look in those normally warm eyes. He's still your childhood friend after all, the optimistic and cheerful Gon. How can you ever think about him changing into something more dark when he sometimes clings to you as silent tears slip out of his eyes? You're in denial for a long time.

🎣​Those empty eyes when the three of you confront Neferpitou are horrific just as much as the hateful and murderous aura around him. Suddenly, as you see Neferpitou pleading to save a human life and Gon mercilessly shooting their offer down, you can't tell who is truly evil anymore. There is a human girl about to die if the Chimera Ant doesn't help them so why won't Gon give them the time they need to properly heal them? Gon surely wouldn't sacrifice a human life, an innocent one? Kite wouldn't have wanted this! The Gon you know wouldn't do this! You try to talk sense into him, ask him to give Pitou the time they asked for yet you stumble back out of fear when he turns around. His face is contorted into a ugly mask you can't bear to look at as he suddenly resembles a monster more than the boy you know. Surely you don't suddenly take the side of the killer of Kite, right?

🎣​You feel like you can't breathe anymore as you stare at the stranger in front of you, your heart beating out of fear. Why do you suddenly fear Gon? Is...Is that even Gon? You are silent for the rest of the time and as soon as Pitou is finished with their work and Gon wants to force them to heal Kite, he tells you in a voice devoid of all emotions that he wants you to stay away and go somewhere safe. Any protest you have dies out when he stares into your soul with those blank eyes that feel like they might suffocate you. You fear a direct confrontation and lie to him, something you've never done intentially before, tell him that you'll wait for him. In reality you just wait until you're sure that neither him nor Pitou with their insane En reach will notice you. You're sweating as images of Gon go through your head, the one you've tried to ignore despite all the signs.

🎣​When the insane wave of Nen hits you, you have a vivid flashback of the first time you met Pitou. Someone is going to die! You rush to the place you sense the trememdous wave of sinister Nen coming from. You stumble and scratch yourself as your body gives up multiple times on you out of a sheer overload of fear yet you force yourself to go on. You have a bad feeling deep down in the pit of your stomach, nearly throw out the contains of your stomach multiple times and are only able to take shallow breaths the closer you get. Once you reach your destination, you finally throw up everything you've eaten as you see something that completely shatters your own heart.

🎣​A huge man, plumming the headless corpse of Pitou into a bloody mush. Tears drop down you feel nauseous, coughing up the bitter and sour liquid of not fully digested food. Your throat stings from the gag reflex as you continue to cry, eyes tightly pressed together as you refuse to look. You know those clothes, you know the color of this hair, you know this Nen aura even if it is nothing like the friendly and passionate one you used to always sense. It feels like all your memories of Gon are tainted until you can only see the image of empty eyes and a dead person who is beating into the ground until only a puddle of blood and bones remains.

🎣​When you hear your own name being called, you choke on the air. Your body is violently shaking and everything inside of you screams to run away yet you don't have the strength. Your head is only able to move milimeters as you slowly dare to lift your head, pupils quivering. The only thing you can hear by now is your own heartbeat threatening to break through your ribs. Yet everything completely stops, even time, as you meet those eyes. He's crying, despite the horrendous act he just committed he is crying, blue blood decorating his face as he looks at you. It feels like you forget how to breathe, even your heart feels like it stops beating in that moment. Your vision is invaded by black dots dancing in front of your eyes as your chest starts to hurt.

🎣​You don't remember much after that, you only know that you wake up inside of a hospital. Apparently you've fainted, Killua found both you and Gon and carried you both back. When you hear Gon's name, your hands clutch the sheets of the bed tightly as your throat feels tight. You barely manage to press out the question of what happened to Gon and the hesitant look on their face has your heart freezing. You prepare yourself for the worst yet nothing could have prepared you for Gon's condition, you nearly throw up again. You get to hear that Killua apparently knows a way to heal Gon and has gone without you yet Leorio is here. When the man asks you worriedly what happened, the full burden hits you and you end up crying in front of him.

🎣​You spend hours just staring through the glass pane, waiting for Killua to come back. During this time you have a lot to think about. Gon has changed. You can't deny this any longer. You've just ignored all the signs you noticed throughout the way since you didn't want to accept that your Gon would ever change. You've been a fool to think that way. This world filled with Nen and hunters is vastly different from the small island you two grew up, obviously you two would change somewhere along the way. You've probably changed too, everyone changes eventually. This realization that Gon has changed and has lost something important has you shedding silent tears. His whole perception of the world must have warped when Kite died and you wonder how much of the old Gon is left. What you do know though is that the sight of this darker Gon has traumatized you and your body still reacts that way even now. There are slight shivers of terror going through your body.

🎣​You force yourself to stay around, at least until Gon finally meets his dad. You even try to stay optimistic when you notice that Gon is back to his old self as soon as Nanika has healed him. Yet you can't. When you stare at his grinning face, your mind automatically recalls empty and cold eyes and a face covered in blue blood. You always have to avoid your eyes as you try to suppress the shivers. You can't converse with him anymore, your responses are short and you always end up excusing yourself, walking quickly away as your hands turn to fists. You can't even look at him anymore, the images of him obliterating a corse haunting you.

🎣​Your distant behavior confuses Gon, it hurts him even. You two have always been so close after all so he isn't able to fathom why you suddenly want to pull away from him. He's a honest and straightforward person so he tries multiple times to ask you about your strange behavior but you constantly dodge him and leave him, not even spare him a glance. He senses your fear. You're scared of him and that knowledge bruises his heart. Why would you be scared of him? He'd never hurt you. His memories are foggy, he can't recall everything that happened after his encounter with Neferpitou and it isn't until Killua tells him that he found you lying unconscious near him that he realizes that you were there too.

🎣​Gon isn't very good with mind games, he confronts you openly about this at one point. Tries to reassure your dwelling fear of what you saw on that day. There are tears brimming in his eyes when he notices how you shake and take a step back as soon as he leans closer, a terrified look on your face. He pleads you to look at him at least just once but when you do and he sees the terror written all over your face, he can't bear it. He starts crying too but instead of trying to comfort him like you used to do, you just stand silently there with your lips pressed into a thin line.

🎣​Gon tries to make you forget, acts extra sweet around you to show you that he's still the same person. He's clingier though and more protective. He tries to tell himself that you'd never leave him, you two made a pinky promise after all to go through everything together. You've forgotten about that promise by now though and can only give him a bewildered look when he reminds you that you two made a promise. That means nothing to you anymore and hearing you say those words plunges a dagger of pain and desperation inside Gon's heart. He grows paranoid even more though he mumbles to himself that you wouldn't leave him since you two have always been together. That everything will be fine between you two. He becomes quite overbearing though, follows you everywhere and is excessively sweet towards you. If you try to run away, dangers are that he'll snap though. He already lost Kite and can't handle losing you too. He needs to protect you.

[mokuhchi-manuscripts]

Hisoka Mikage with an S/O with PTSD

A/N: I wrote this because I have PTSD and I love Hisoka, so I thought why not write Hisoka comforting his S/O who has PTSD ;^;; this is really self-indulgent but I hope y’all enjoy nonetheless! If you’d like to see any other symptoms not mentioned here, let me know!

CW(s): nondescript mentions of flashbacks, nondescript mentions of nightmares

❅ Hisoka Mikage

Hisoka has had his own share of numbers and unwanted memories, so although he can’t completely relate, he can understand a little bit.

When you decide to tell him that you have PTSD, he just holds you close. He doesn’t ask ‘why?’ or any other questions- in his mind they’re details he doesn’t need to know unless you’re comfortable with telling him.

If you decide to tell him what event(s) caused your PTSD, he will listen intently, focusing on every word you say. He lets you talk about anything and everything relating to, or not relating to, the event(s). He doesn’t ask questions, unless you explicitly tell him he can, not wanting to ask for details you’re not comfortable sharing. It doesn’t matter if you’re vague, or go into more detail, he listens and, if you want, he offers comfort when you’re done talking about it.

The first time you have a flashback in front of him, he slightly panics. On the outside, he appears more calm and collected, not wanting to appear ‘freaked out’ in front of you, but on the inside he’s concerned and slightly frantic. If you’re able to talk, he asks if he can touch you. If you say yes, he’ll either rub your back or hold you in an act of comfort. If you say no, he won’t touch you, and will not try to comfort you with physical gestures until you tell him he can, if that’s what you want. No matter if you can talk or not, he’ll try to “pull you out of it” by telling you you’re okay, you’re safe, you’re not there anymore, etc. He’ll coax you to name things you can smell, see, taste, feel, and hear as it’s a grounding technique. After the flashback is over, he’ll ask if you’re okay and what he can do to help, if there is anything he can do to help. If there is, he’ll do literally anything you ask of him. Once you’ve calmed down a bit, he asks if you want to talk about it. If you say no, he drops it and asks if you’d rather have a distraction, but if you say yes, he listens intently. He also asks what he should do if you have another flashback, not wanting to do something that may make it worse.

The first time you have a nightmare in front of him, it’s the same. Internally he panics, externally he’s calm and collected. He tries to wake you up, to pull you out of your nightmare, while saying “It’s okay. You’re safe. You’re somewhere safe. It’s okay. You’re okay.” Once you wake up, he asks if you want to talk about it, opening up that communication if you need it. If you’d rather not talk about it, he asks if you’d rather have a distraction. Either way, he asks if he can do anything to help, and if there’s anything he should do if it happens in the future.

He’ll ask if you have any triggers he should be mindful of, whether it be phrases, actions, places, etc. He doesn’t want to do something that’ll accidentally trigger you.

· · ─────── · ☆ · ─────── · ·

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[vida-magkav-phinks-sister]

The attack of the Demon Dog Mafia

(Warning blood and near death involved)

Phinks was worried about his little sister being kidnapped by some crazy person. She is only eighteen years old, she didn't know any better, he knew how much this would worry her and that's exactly why he's so worried. He just can't help it, what if something happened to her? even being part of the Phantom troupe made Phinks nervous, he couldn't bear the thought of losing one of his precious teammates. So yeah, he is scared and he doesn't want anything bad happening to her. The whole team, except for Hisoka, are worried too, but they have each other's backs in the event something happens to their own siblings.

"Hey." Phinks hears a deep voice say and looks up from his laptop screen. It was one of the Phantom Troupe members. They are all sitting around the table in Phinks' house, they had been here for quite some time already and they were finally getting some news. "Franklin what is it?" Phinks asks.

He looks over at him and sighs. Franklin just stares at Phinks before speaking again. "I got some news from a friend of mine who saw that she was kidnapped" he starts saying.

"What did they see" Phinks ask. "They saw that she was getting beat up and they dragged her in to a van and drove off with her in it." he replies.

A few seconds of silence pass between them while everyone takes that new piece of information in.

"That can't be possible!" Phinks says out loud when he realizes what he has just said.

Everyone turns towards him with shocked expressions. Phinks shakes his head and closes the laptop on the table. "No no no no! That's not true, that can't be I should have not let her go on that mission alone I knew that this was going to happen to her!!!!!" he said.

"We have to go after them!" Machi states. Everyone nods in agreement.

"We need to have a plan first off but it's midnight so we should rest for the time being and figure it out in the morning!" Franklin said

Phinks is going to try to keep calm because he feels like the pressure is crushing his chest. "If I wasn't so damn scared for my little sis then maybe this wouldn't be an issue, but I'm freaking terrified, how do you expect me to go through with this?!" he exclaims.

Everyone goes quiet.

He takes in a few breathes to calm himself down before continuing. "I can't lose another family member!" he says. The words leave his mouth without meaning to. He is afraid, he is terrified but he can't let anyone see that. Not yet anyway. His expression is hard to read though and his teammates can tell that it must be difficult for him to admit to himself that he feels like this.

"Come on, let's talk more about this tomorrow." Shalnark says, trying to lighten things up.

After Phinks agrees the group ends up talking about random stuff until the sky begins to show the first signs of dawn. Phinks tries to stay awake but soon enough he falls asleep next he hears a tap on his window and he saw that it was his little sister Vida she escaped from the kidnappers. She looked absolutely miserable. "Vida!" Phinks exclaimed as he jumped out of his bed running over to his younger sister. opening the window to let her in.

Vida wraps her arms around him tightly, letting out a sob.

"Oh sis, shhhh shhh..." he says and holds her closely. After a couple of moments Vida pulls away and wipes her tears.

"Thanks..." she whispers and sits down on Phinks's bed. Her breathing is heavy, her eyes red. And her side was bleeding which had him concerned about it being her big brother after all. Vida grabs his hand and squeezes it tight.

"Why did they kidnap you?!" Phinks yells, slightly angry.

Vida just shrugs her shoulders before answering quietly, almost like she expected the question from Phinks himself, "They wanted to ransom me back."

She sounds devastated saying those words. It breaks Phinks's heart to hear his little sister in such a position. He hugs her tightly again and kisses her forehead.

Vida sighs and rests her head against his shoulder before whispering softly, "Do you think I'm in danger?"

He wants to deny that, he really does but it seems impossible.

She's just a kid. "Of course baby sis! What kind of stupid question is that?" he snaps back and scoffs bitterly. "Of course I think you're in danger!"

Vida doesn't answer right away. She just stays silent, hugging him closer. Shalnark then knocked on the door and he was shocked at Vida's condition , "Are you alright?" he asked and walked over to where the two were sitting.

Vida looks over at him. There are tear stains under her eyes but she looks relatively fine.

Shalnark walks over to her and kneels down in front of her, "What happened? Did they hurt you?" he asks.

Vida looks at Shalnark and sniffles.

Shalnark gently lifts her chin up with his finger and wipes the tears off of her face.

Vida doesn't look comfortable but manages to keep her gaze locked on Shalnark's, she swallows a lump in her throat before looking away.

"Who are those people who kidnapped you? Why did they kidnap you? Can I kill them for you?" Shalnark asks sternly.

Vida looks at him with wide eyes before quickly and then said "The Demon Dogs Mafia!"

"The what!?" Phinks yelled in response. "You've got to be kidding me!" he shouts. "Why didn't you call us earlier? What did they do to you?" he asks.

There are tears streaming down her cheeks, and Shalnark puts a comforting arm around her shoulder, pulling her close to him. "they broke my phone that you got me in case of an emergency," she explains. "they kept threatening to break my leg but I managed to hide my injury so they left me alone," she continues. "They threatened to hurt you too, Phinks!" Vida yells as she bursts into tears again. "But why would they want to ransom you! We can always get you out of there!" Phinks says. He tries to comfort Vida again. "It's okay Vida! They'll never harm you ever again, I promise," he says and smiles sadly.

Shalnark notices the change in Phinks's tone and turns to look at him. Shalnark furrowed his eyebrows and asked "How many of those men were there?"

Vida answers before Phinks could reply. "Five or six I guess," she mumbles and sniffles.

He shakes his head and mutters "Damn it..."

"Don't worry Vida, we will figure something out. You won't be in trouble with any of us," he says.

She sniffles and gives him a weak smile before nodding and returning the kiss on his cheek, giving him a small hug.

Phinks sighs heavily and stands up, helping Vida onto his bed so she's lying down properly. He brushes her hair behind her ear and hugs her tightly "I love you big brother" she whispers.

"Love you too little sis," Phinks responds and smiles at her.

Shalnark watches them and then looks at Phinks who seems lost in his thoughts as he thinks about the situation. He looks at Vida once again before turning to Phinks and speaking. "You should probably go to sleep now" Phinks then said "Not a chance in hell in the world I am going to fall asleep now."

Shalnark shakes his head and chuckles lightly. "Just rest a bit Phinks. You don't need to get up every hour worrying about your sister."

"That's not it! I'm gonna make sure that they don't get her again!" Phinks says angrily.

"I know but it's not good if you are stressed out about it," Shalnark says. Phinks looks at him and then nods.

"Yeah, you're right. Just promise me that you won't get yourself involved either." Phinks says. Phinks then felt his little sister move around in his arms but it was violent waking up screaming and yelling. She starts crying and screaming and everything in her head is screaming at her.

"Stop it!" he screams as loud as he possibly could. It doesn't help however and she continues to yell.

Her cries wake everyone else.

Machi is already at the doorway in less than a second. "What the hell is wrong with her?!" she exclaims worriedly Phinks held her more tightly trying to calm her down. She's not having a seizure or anything but she keeps on shouting and screaming.

Phinks has to hold her tighter when the screaming gets louder. "Please stop! Please stop hurting me!" She suddenly yells. Tears stream down Phinks's face and he can't do anything but continue holding her.

Suddenly the door burst open and one man comes rushing inside.

"Take her!" he roars, pushing Phinks away. Once he reaches Vida he grabs her by the back of her shirt and throws her across the room. Everyone is surprised by Vida's sudden scream.

"No! No! Stop! Don't touch me! Leave me alone!" She screams. Everyone stares at her, frozen in fear.

Vida falls harshly on her butt and immediately curls into a ball. This happens all the time, usually it's because someone hits her or kicks her when she tries to escape. The only difference this time is how she reacted. Phinks then looked the man who had thrown her and glared furiously, clenching his fist tightly. "You better leave her alone or you'll regret it!" he growls.

The man just smirks, "We'll see about that Phinks. We've got nothing to lose."

Phinks frowns deeply, knowing that he doesn' t want his baby sister getting harmed. But he also knows it's best if Vida doesn't get involved with this. She isn't ready yet.

Before anyone could say another thing another one entered the room, he grabbed Vida by the ankle.

"Get your filthy hands off my sister you filthy beast!" Phinks screams and runs over, grabbing the man's wrist before kicking the man hard in the stomach.

"Ahh!" the man shouts, dropping Vida. Vida falls to the ground and rolls over to hide underneath the bed. The moment Vida was hidden under his bed she started shaking violently and cried uncontrollably.

"Phinks... no.." she mumbled. She was scared of what was going to happen next.

The man groans loudly and rubs his chest before standing up shakily and making his way towards Vida while laughing. "This little girl...she's mine now, you understand?! If she dies, so do you!" he says with a sinister laugh before reaching for Vida who was hiding under the bed. Phinks punches the man as hard as he can which caused his teeth to knock together painfully. The man then falls to the floor in pain while holding his jaw.

"Don't come near her!" Phinks shouts and glares fiercely at the man on the ground. He takes a step forward. "Now get the fuck away from my sister!"

The man raises an eyebrow and smirks, "What? So you have a crush on your own sister?" Phinks glared at the man and said "No I'm her guardian and I will do everything to protect my little sister! So don't fucking touch her again or else-" "-Or else?" the man interrupts. Phinks grits his teeth. "Or else.. you'll fucking die," Phinks finishes. The man smirks even harder. "Wow, so this man really cares about his little sister huh? Interesting. Very interesting. Well then you won't mind if I steal her."

Vida flinches at the mans words, causing Phinks to frown. "Excuse me? You aren't taking her!" he says angrily. "You heard me! She's coming home with me and you can't stop me!"

"Fuck you asshole!" Phinks snaps. He grabs Vida's hand as she came out of under the bedand pushes it against his pocket before wrapping both arms round her, shielding her body with his own.

"Alrighty then boys, you can have your little sister back after you're gone and let the boss do what he wants with her!" the man says and laughs again as Vida wrenches herself free from his grip and runs towards the entrance, sobbing. "Hey!" she hears one of the men shout, "Come back here, bitch!" She stops running and turns back to face them, staring at them defiantly. She lets out a whimper as she backs away. "Big brother!!!!" She cries as they come closer. Suddenly one of them tackles her from behind, knocking her to the ground. She feels herself hit the ground hard, her vision going blurry.

Phinks runs over as fast as he can, holding Vida's hand in his as she grips his fingers tightly. Shalnark then glared at the men and says "Why are you doing this to my friend and his little sister??" on of the men them pulled a knife out and then grabbed Vida by her arm causing Phinks to lose his grip and then cutting her neck and chest. Vida gasps in pain and tries to reach for her throat, she then collapses and begins to cough, blood spilling from her mouth.

Phinks stares in horror at what just happened.

"Vida!!!" Phinks shouts and runs to the fallen body and grabs her body gently, holding it close to his chest. The men then left leaving Vida's body bleeding on the ground while he sits there and stares at his little sister.

She lays there limp in Phinks' arms unable to speak or move. There's a large gash on her chest and one on her abdomen, blood soaking through her clothes.

Phinks shakes his head and closes his eyes. "Big brother..... please don't let me die!" Vida says quietly as tears began to fall from his eyes as well as hers. They both knew it wasn't a joke, she didn't want die. Phinks picked up his sister and and carried her to the hospital , hoping to get help quickly.

Vida woke up, still feeling weak. She felt like shit, the pain from earlier had become extremely unbearable. She slowly opens her eyes and looks around the familiar area. A frown appears on her lips seeing that there weren't any guards there. Instead she sees some familiar faces surrounding her.

She quickly tries to sit up but feels a sharp pain in her chest. Her breathing becomes heavy. She tried moving again but failed due to the pain in her chest. She then hears footsteps walking towards her. She looked up and saw the doctor smiling sadly at her. He crouches down in front of her and says softly "How are you feeling dear?"

Vida frowns slightly but smiles nonetheless. "A bit tired... but otherwise okay." The doctor smiled warmly and patted her cheek softly. "That's good to hear dear. And I am happy to announce that you are out of danger and we are now planning to release you as soon as we are able. I suggest getting ready though, you will probably be released early tomorrow morning." he said "Where is my big brother? Is he ok?" Vida asked looking around frantically. "Calm down dear, he is fine. He went outside with a nurse so I thought it would be better if he went and checked up on you," The doctor said and stood up straight. "I must leave now dear, call me if you need anything else," He said giving her one last smile before leaving the room and closing the door behind him. Vida looks around trying to see where her brother had gone but she couldn't find him anywhere in the hospital.

"Phinks!" She yelled, calling out for him desperately. "Phinks!!" Her voice grew louder and louder but she could still barely make out anything. "Phinks!" Her voice breaks a couple times as more tears flow down her cheeks. "Please! Where are you?!"

Phinks walks past people walking into their offices or workplaces in the building. Some look at him curiously while others just glare at him. None of these workers cared what the hell was going on around them knowing that he heard his little sister yelling for him so loud.

He sighs tiredly as he finally finds the nurse, "Hello sir. What is your name?" she asked. Phinks clears his throat. "Um.. my name is Phinks..." he replied hesitantly. "Well Mr. Phinks, your sister is awake and she would like to talk to you. She's been yelling your name for quite some time now" She says with a kind smile and Phinks nods and goes to take the elevator.

When he gets in there a few nurses are standing inside waiting for Phinks to arrive. They smile at him kindly and walk past him, heading towards her room. She was still yelling his name and crying hysterically for him.

As soon as Phinks enters her room, he is greeted with a sets of blue eyes watching him anxiously. "Big brother? Where were you? Why did you leave me here after those guys almost killed me? THOSE MEN ARE STILL OUT THERE!!!!!! THEY WANT TO KILL ME!!!!" Vida says with concern laced in her voice. Phinks frowned but remained silent. "Answer me!!" she demanded. "Vida... calm down... I will explain when you calm down" Phinks said, taking his seat by her side. He sighed once more as he stared at her.

Vida sat on the edge of the bed quietly sniffing while staring at her hands. blood dripped from her nose from all the crying she had been doing during the past hour. Phinks reached for her hand which caused her to start trembling slightly and cry. He held her hand as he wiped the blood off her face with the sleeve of his jacket. She stopped sobbing but continued to hold onto his sleeve. Phinks sighed. His expression softens and he starts explaining everything that happened after she passed out in his arms.

Vida listens to every word with full attention but doesn't utter a single word throughout it. It makes Phinks worried because she never shows emotion. She stayed silent and just listened to everything Phinks has to say. After he finishes telling Vida what happened, she just stares at him. She didn't say a word and she just kept shaking her head in disbelief. Phinks then notices that Vida was starting to cry again.

"Vida.... hey", he whispers soothingly as he pulls her close to his chest. "I know it hurts right now, but it's gonna be alright. Don't worry" he adds. She nods slightly as she continues to shake silently.

They stay like that until they are told that the doctors are done with their examinations and that they would release Vida once they've got everything checked out. Phinks stands up and holds Vida's hand as they go to meet the doctors to check up on her wounds. Once they get out to where the doctors are, they go inside where she was to be checked out as well.

Once they get out, they walk to the receptionist desk to get a wheelchair. "Can we help you?'' The lady asks kindly. "No thank you. Can you tell us how long it will take to heal Vida's wounds?'' Phinks asks politely. She nods "It'll take about three weeks for the wound to heal completely, then another two weeks for the scarring to fade. However, since she has only been injured, the scars may not be visible for many months to years." She replies. "Thank you", Phinks says before leaving with Vida. "Do you think she'll be alright?" Phinks said to the receptionist while pushing the wheelchair as they walk. "I'm sure she'll be fine. We have a lot of experience dealing with these types of injuries."

"Yeah, well, she is kinda an idiot." He replies sarcastically. The receptionist giggles lightly "But she's also very brave, and strong." She answers. "Oh yeah?! Well, let's hope that strength lasts after she leaves this place." He mumbles sarcastically before stopping outside the doors and helping his sister out of the wheelchair and walked outside and Shalnark pulled up with the car , they then helped her into the car and started driving.

The ride back to the house was quiet, Vida was sitting in the car staring out the window in thought, while Phinks was deep in thought. Vida glanced over at her brother who was staring outside at the passing scenery, not saying a word. She couldn't blame him, it was her fault after all. She shouldn't have gone on that mission by herself. If she hadn't, none of this would've happened. If only she could change her decision....

Suddenly she feels someone squeeze her hand, startling her slightly. Turning to look at her brother, she sees a small smile on his face. "Hey.... don't beat yourself up over this Vida......" he says reassuringly before turning his gaze back on the road. "I promise you that you will get better, and soon, alright? I can't stand seeing you hurting like this." He added. Vida just nodded, unable to speak.

They arrive home soon enough and walk inside, Phinks pushes her into the living room where they found Machi on the couch asleep. "You should sleep in your own bed tonight." Phinks whispered, nudging his sister slightly. Vida simply nodded as she followed her brother to herbedroom where he gently set her down on the bed. Once Vida laid down Phinks turned off the lights and left the room closing the door behind him.

As soon as Phinks exited the room, Vida immediately turns her body facing the wall and covered her ears. She knew she was supposed to feel guilty or something but she couldn't bring herself to feel guilty at the moment, she felt too numb. Vida closes her eyes as she hears the door shut and she drifts off to sleep.

[strawbabysimp]

Adult Trio Soulmate Strings AU HCs

Chrollo

No one had told him what the string meant, what was on the other side waiting for him. Children in Meteor City knew how to fight and how to live and how to kill. Not how to love. Or maybe they did and the world simply told them they shouldn't. That they weren't deserving of it. As he got older Chrollo eventually sought out the meaning of this mysterious red string, finding his answer in one of the books he managed to get his hands on in that wretched and beloved place. A soulmate.

There was a person out there just for him, but more importantly, there was a destiny. A plan for him. He knew he had to find them, to secure this irrefutable connection to another. The leader had planned to meet them when he got out of Meteor City, it was part of the reason he formed the Troupe. Though, as the years went on and life took its toll on him, as it did anyone, the desire to find this person faded. By the time The Spiders had managed to become a notorious group, it was a dream within a dream. A soulmate? How tragically philosophical.

That's not to say he wasn't curious, but he lost that drive, running on autopilot as he searched for a passion without the motivation to even want one. Sometimes he did find himself especially enraptured by the red string secured around his finger though, toying with it during meetings or tying small knots that soon came undone while laying in bed.

Guilt wasn't something he felt often, taking lives and valuables without a second thought was a regular occurrence, but with you? He felt utterly in the wrong. To deny you of something even he found beautiful simply because he "didn't care?" That's when he felt like a monster. He found comfort in the title though, embracing the fact of what he was. He was selfish and greedy and somehow still found a way to prevent himself from gaining the one thing that could save him.

One day he had been twisting the string between his fingers, a mannerism that even the others around him had picked up on when there was a tug back. It became a regular occurrence, the two of you pulling on the string lightly back and forth. You tried to beg him through the string to come to find you, pulling him in your direction, but he never did come. You knew it was impossible to tell, but it seemed he had gotten even farther away.

The only connection you'd ever have with him was through those small motions and you'd go on to love someone else. Maybe not in the way you would have loved him, but there's not much to do when you're destined to love someone who was forced to learn how not to.

Hisoka

"I don't have one" he'd respond calmly. This was his and his alone, so what if people thought he was a freak? He wouldn't allow someone to interfere with this in even the most minuscule way. A person who relied on him and only him to fulfill the grandest idea of love? Nothing could hold more power than the blood-soaked string tied around his ring finger.

Heaven's Arena was a well-known spot, a tourist attraction of sorts, so you simply had to stop by when you happened to be near. As you made your way to the stands and gazed on at the stage you found him already looking at you, giving you a quick smirk as your gaze fell to his hand with a shocked expression. At the end of his "performance" he typically met with fans but this time he naturally went straight to you, a single blood-stained rose held out in a tender gesture. You didn't question how he had managed to obtain the flower, too busy processing the fact that this bizarre man was your soulmate.

Every moment with you is too much for him to endure. It's an adrenalin rush that he's become addicted to but whenever he looks at you he gets this urge to tear everything you are apart and cover himself in the pieces he could never think to reach from the outside. Being close to you is never close enough and the only way to satisfy this feeling of need would be to destroy you. He can't bear to do that but it's so tempting.

At rare times something in him seemed to break, going off on tangents about the cruelty of his thoughts and how he longed to turn you into yet another victim of his murderous desires. He had planned to take over your life, wishing to bask in the high your undying love was sure to give him. A man becoming weak through the pursuit of power is a pitiful sight even for one not tied to them by fate. "My love will never complete you. I take and I take and I offer up only the worst parts of myself because that's all I have to offer. That's the tragedy of loving me, my dear. I will not apologize because I do not feel bad, however, I will not allow myself to hurt such a lovely thing."

You always come back to each other, the string acting as a sort of magnet between you two. Eventually, you both come to accept the situation for what it is; deadly but far too tempting to not risk everything for. He was the most beautiful thing you'd ever laid eyes on and if the image of him was the last thing you ever saw you'd consider it a privilege.

Surprisingly enough, the magician never does end up taking your life, finding the unfamiliar task of restraining himself a new sort of challenge to prove his strength. Holding you close to him, pressing your body against his as he watches your auras merge, was a common occurrence. When his bloodlust rose and your fear spiked just a fraction he would plant a gentle kiss on your cheek before pulling away with some excuse, you both knew he did this to protect you but he'd never admit that.

Illumi

Soulmates were a weakness in the eyes of the Zoldycks, hypocritical to say the least as Silva and Kikyo were tied by fate, but that was typical. Despite the harsh words his parents had told him, his curiosity would eventually get the better of him and he would seek you out. Traveling in the direction the string took him without fail. It was an easy task when you had money and power. Locating you was not the issue, deciding what to do with you once found was. Simply approaching you wouldn't do.

He watched you for a long time, disappearing into a crowd or dark corner whenever you felt eyes on you. One day you found yourself doing trivial tasks, walking the streets on your way to pick up a snack, or do some light shopping when an unfamiliar feeling hit you. It wasn't unpleasant so much as it was surprising. You even describe it as lovely.

Despite his best efforts to keep himself hidden from your view, Illumi had never been trained to hide love. Pain, fear, anger, sadness, all these were painstakingly buried deep within him to the point that even he didn't know how to release them. But what he felt when looking at you grew greater with each small action and he didn't notice it slipping through until it was too late.

The second your eyes met he was a goner. It was like a drug to the emotionally-deprived man and while he knew it wouldn't do any good to engage you, the selfishness that was ripped out of him from a young age came flooding back full force. Both of you remained shocked as you approached one another but the small smile you gave him was enough to make him think that maybe this was the one time surrendering himself to feelings was okay.

Marrying you was a plan he wants to put into action as soon as possible, using the piece of paper as a form of protection. "Never kill a family member" read the Zoldyck rules that were engraved into the assassin's mind. This would be one of many forms of rebellion you had influenced Illumi in making, and while it wasn't necessarily against the rules, it was certainly not something he thought his parents would approve of.

When you're hanging out he remains a bit stiff, not sure of how to act around someone casually. You begin to feel off-put by the awkward composure of your soulmate though he picks up on it easily, his ability to read people far more advanced than the average person. Illumi allows a small bit of his aura to shine through the veil to reassure you of his contentment, and while he won't acknowledge it, you're grateful for his efforts. It's during one of these dates, hidden away in a hotel relaxing beside one another, that the usually warm and comforting aura changes. His arm comes to hold you just a bit tighter and the love he allowed to encompass you shut off. This had happened times before but your attempts at reassurance through small touches did no help to soothe the Zoldyck.

Later that night his hand would rest gently against your cheek as the light in your eyes dies, your face is wet with tears but a forgiving smile still rests kindly on your face. You're already gone. He can feel it. Despite this he holds you against him late into the night, only letting go when he can no longer bear to see you in such a state. His eyes stay downcast as he refuses to look up at the state the sky is in, not wanting to face the fact that the wetness of his cheeks could be from anything other than the weather. He sends one message before putting his phone away with shaking hands. Yet another job is done.

[moonlight-translation-archive]

A3! Mikage Hisoka | R - Scarlet Mirror | Translation

Thanks a lot Noodles for your help proofreading backstage! (´｡• ᵕ •｡`)

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Disclaimer: Neither english or japanese are my native language, but I did my best with the translation. If you find any mistake, feel free to tell me. By the way, Director’s name will be Izumi.

Hisoka’s mischief /1

Homare: I’ve come back home!  Homare: … Homare: …What a rare sight. There is no one here. Hisoka: Zzz… Homare: Oh…? Hisoka-kun? Homare: Oh dear, he is sleeping in this kind of place once again. Come on. Wake up, please… hm? Homare: Ah! T-This book is…!

Hisoka: Ngh… Hisoka: … Hisoka: …?

Tsumugi: Tenma-kun, could you solve it? We’ll finish today’s study session with that question. Do your best. Tenma: I’ll solve it… just a bit more… Taichi: Tsumugi-sensei! What do I have to do here!? Tsumugi: Ah, for that one— Hisoka: … Homare: So you’re finally awake, Hisoka-kun. Izumi: Good morning, Hisoka-san. Hisoka: I feel like… I was sleeping here. Homare: Indeed you were... But I asked Tasuku-kun to carry you to our room since the student group had a study session here.   Hisoka: …I didn’t notice. Izumi: Hisoka-kun must have been soundly asleep. Omi: Everyone, dinner is almost ready. Izumi: Thanks, Omi-kun. I’ll help you set the table.    Tsumugi: We’ll leave it here then. Good job, you two. Tenma: Somehow, we finished the assignment…  Taichi: Using my brain made me hungry! 

Hisoka: …I also feel hungry after sleeping. Arisu, marshmallow.     Homare: Dear… they said we will have dinner now.The marshmallows are postponed until we finish eating. Hisoka: …Stingy. Homare: And who are you calling stingy!  Homare: …Aah, right. This book was forgotten here. Hisoka: ...ah, “Holmes”. Homare: It was dropped next to the sleeping you. I see you gave it a proper read!  Taichi: Whoa! That’s a really thick book!   Hisoka: It’s perfectly thick to serve as a pillow when I get sleepy.    Homare: So you use it like that!?  Hisoka: …it's a joke. Izumi: Come on. Hisoka-san is reading it to prepare for the next play, right? Hisoka: Mhm. Tenma: Many actors have played Holmes incredibly well. But I think Hisoka-san can do it well too. Homare: I look forward to that moment. Hisoka: …I’ll do my best.

Hisoka’s mischief /2

Hisoka: … (trying to not sleep) Hisoka: …doze off.    Hisoka: …! (wakes up) Tasuku: He has been for dozing off for a while. Tsumugi: Ahaha… still, Hisoka-kun is doing his best, don’t you think? Azuma: I agree. He’s progressing pretty well with his reading.     Tsumugi: His bookmark also went farther than before. Homare: I bought him bookmarks with cat figures so he can enjoy his reading. Azuma: Fufu. That’s nice of you, Homare. Kumon: I’m going my best with my reading too! Homare: Yes, that’s remarkable.     Kumon: Earlier, I read a story where a wax doll just like Holmes appeared—   Kumon: Speaking of, Kazu-san made a doll just like himself before~! Hisoka: …really? Kumon: Uh-huh! It was for his role study in our ninja play. The art of cloning~! Tasuku: Can you call that cloning? Kumon: It was banned because everyone freaked out with it, tho…  I wonder where is that doll now~ Azuma: Maybe at school? I heard it was an assignment. Hisoka: A wax doll…

Hisoka: … Homare: Oh, Hisoka-kun. Why are you alone in a place like this?  Hisoka?: … Homare: …Don’t tell me you fell asleep standing up.  What a skill you have to fall asleep in strange places.  Hisoka?: … Homare: …Hisoka-kun?  Reply to me, at least. It’s making me nervous not seeing you blink either.  Hisoka?: … Homare: Could it be that your time has stopped…! Izumi: Homare-san? What happens? Homare: Director-kun! Hisoka-kun is not moving an inch…!  Izumi: Isn’t he just sleeping as always? Hisoka-san, please wake up… Hisoka?: … Izumi: Eh!? No way… Hisoka-sa~n! Hisoka?: … Izumi: He is not reacting at all… Homare: This is a serious problem…!

Hisoka: Arisu and Director. Izumi: !? Homare: There are two of him!? Kazunari: Ye~y! Were you two surprised by it!?   Izumi: Kazunari-kun!?  Kazunari: I made it since Hiso-hiso asked me to. My masterpiece: Hiso-hiso doll! Izumi: Doll…? Wait, the same happened a while ago…  Kazunari: Yeah! The wax doll from the shinobi play. I had lots of fun making it that even became a way to rest! Hisoka: It’s part of my role study. Izumi: This is getting out of hand…  Homare: And it’s bad for the heart. It must be banned! Kazunari: Eh~!? Yet again, my wax doll is banned… vibes down~!  

Notes: The incident with Kazunari’s wax doll is in his N card from SHI★NO★BI Misadventuring.

[shadowynn]

Random and not fic related but I see you have anime in your bio so I was wondering what animes are your favorites or what you’ve watched recently <3

Ahh, yes!! Secretly hoped someone would ask this because I just love talking about anime, so I’ll give my top 5!

Violet Evergarden. I’m a shonen fan, and like this show’s premise isn’t my normal cup of tea, but god do I love this show so freaking much. And the second movie. God, it was such the perfect end to the series. Like this show just hits you in all the feels and there’s no questions here about it being my favorite. I’ve never cried so much before, but it also just leaves you all warm and fuzzy too. I recommend it all the time and people will be like, yeah, I wasn’t a fan, and I’m like, you didn’t finish it did you, and they were like, no. And that’s why. The composer for the anime has literally been in my top five artists on Spotify the past two years.

Hunter x Hunter. The Phantom Troupe, I love them. And yeah, I love the story and it’s fun, but The Phantom Troupe is what makes it for me. Well, that and Hisoka. I love my chaotic and edgy characters. (I’ve actually been writing a hisoka x reader/chrollo x reader fic for like a year now and might start posting it here soon. Been into instrumentals lately for music again, and it’s been feeding my Chrollo fascination. Like I really want to write for this man right now) also, departure was my #1 most listened to song this year and I was surprised. Didn’t realize I listened to it that much.

Jujutsu Kaisen. This and HxH are a little interchangeable, just depends on my mood. But god, I love it. Like, the characters are all soo good. Finding decent female characters in anime can sometimes be hard, probably cause I watch a lot of shonen, but still, women are so much more than fan service. But this show. Like, such strong characters and I freaking love Maki. I’ve also wrote a little of a gojo x reader/geto x reader, but it’s probably not reached the point where I can start posting anytime soon. Also, Lost in Paradise is soooo good. In my top 5 songs of the year as well.

Death Parade. Guys, this anime freaking broke me. Of all the animes I’ve watched, this and Violet Evergarden just hit me in the feels. It does deal with the topic of suicide (as it’s a show about death) so be warned if that’s something you struggle with! I definitely struggled the first time and i legit just kind of laid there for hours after completing, but god, is it so good. That and Flyers is also a bop. Best anime intro and nothing will ever beat it for me. But be warned, that intro is the most deceiving intro you will ever watch for a show.

Spy x Family. This show is just so cute. Like, I’ve never giggled or laughed as much in an anime before. It’s just so wholesome and cute and I absolutely live for it. All I need is for yor and loid to fall in love and I will die happy.

Honorable mentions: Kabanari of the Iron Fortress, Kotaro Lives Alone, Your Lie in April, My Hero Academia, Mob Pyscho 100, Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood

Currently watching: Bungo Stray Dogs, Spy x Family, Chainsaw Man, and rewatching Soul Eater (one of the first animes I ever watched like way back in jr. high)

[amorouswhores]

006 || Aurelia

headcanons

tw; anxiety (in the paragraph right below-a/n)

had a quick anxiety attack and wanted to write about my comfort characters to help my mind get off what triggered it, so have some headcanons bc writers block! send requests please lmfao- also, girlfriend reader to illumi who’s a mother figure to kalluto bc🦋

Illumi and Kalluto x reader soft headcanons

the first day you went to the Zoldyck mansion to meet Illumis family, you saw Silva facing the other way in the distance and yelled ‘HOLY FUCK’

you ended up running away out of embarrassment while Illumi stayed there confused

Illumi almost NEVER- and i mean NEVER talks and it’s freaked you out on multiple occasions

Kalluto, in his free time, will follow you around like a duckling

you often say you’ve adopted Kalluto at this point and Illumis mind is just-

‘Kalluto: brother- but girlfriends son-? does that mean i’m Kallutos father-brother? did mother and father agree to this-‘

poor poor confused illumi

you’ve forced Illumi and Kalluto to spend time together.

They’ve spent time together before so it wasn’t that awkward

..but still.

Kalluto has recognized Hisoka as ‘the weird tall creepy clown man’

Kalluto once walked in on you genuinely questioning if you could get pregnant from sucking dick and swallowing

there was this tiktok- and it’s made sense- it was all a mess-

but then Illumi just- ‘well you aren’t pregnant yet, so i don’t think so’

insert Kallutos loud ‘EW’ and Illumi questioning when the younger brother had entered the room

Kalluto has totally never knocked on Illumis door while you two were “dirty dancing”

he has on multiple occasions and has been genuinely upset before

Kalluto and Illumi usually just sit there...silent...

you could call it bonding ig🧍‍♀️

oh no.....is that.....ShArK WEeK

Illumi never knows what to do

bc one minute you’re crying and can’t say coherent words- and the next, you’re throwing a pillow at him for not being in bed, cuddling you already

Alright that was short as hell but fun-ish

i write platonic for Kalluto now

but pls this writers block sucks ass