#found this old dr\awing i dont think i ever shared it except for with my wife Because i thought it was too weird

[eggwishing]

funni alien junk joke

[6stronghands]

Got these at a gas station in a bitty little Kansas town. It’s like they figured out how to transform garlic knots into pretzels. With a little tang, a little spice or mustard or something. So good.

They also had honest to god sour pickles (!!!!) and this thing called a cheese sammich, which was just nice sausage sliced thin in layers of nice cheese. Just meat and cheese packaged in a sandwich shape, sealed in plastic. And, like the pickles and pretzels, it was freakin terrific.

I know I said once that the perfect interstate road trip food was Dr Pepper and a 5 pound bag of chocolate cinnamon bears from Costco, but I’m mostly off sugar now so that’s a no-go, and this stuff is so good that it’s my new holy grail snack food. I haven’t really found any non-sugary thing that I’ve much liked til now, so I’m pretty happy with this discovery.

(I really, truly feel better, look better, have less pain, less lupus / thyroid puffiness, more stable moods and energy off sugar. I even went down 2 sizes, not changing my diet or exercise at all, just cutting out desserts and treats. Which SUUUUCKS because I didn’t think it would make that big a difference. For 10 years, I tried paleo, Zone, no carb, keto, vegetarian, vegan, dairy free…all of it, all for a decent amount of time, and none of it made a huge difference in my health. But the thing I love most in all the world, THAT’S the goddamm thing I have to give up, that’s what really works for me and my specific stupid body. Utterly unfair.

It took about a YEAR to stop the sugar cravings, headaches, shakes, etc. They said a month or two. Nope. No. At least a year, probably longer. And I still want it emotionally. I literally dream about candy sometimes. Which I shouldn’t share because that’s pitiful and I’m not three, but I do. I even had a dream that I was making hamburgers for my kids and I got big chocolate bars and melted them on top of the patties instead of cheese. Awful. I dream that I’m cooking desserts, or I’m buying candy at the store. Dreaming about my drug of choice, like an addict. Almost 2 years sugar-free, or at least sugar-bomb free, and I still do this. [Don’t @me about processed foods that add sugar, or about carbs. For real. Dont. I’m working on my own little junky self, on my personal specific little junky thing. Right now, this is working. For me. Maybe I’ll adjust later, maybe not. I’m not telling anyone to diet, or cut out dessert. Have a bite on my behalf, like, “This one’s for the wretched bitch SixStrongHands, too bad for her dumbass,” the the next time you eat something wonderful. Like sincerely, enjoy yourself, I’m happy for you. Life is frequently rotten, and chocolate, cake, pie, and even drugstore candies are some of the reliably great things. I don’t mean to act like an alcoholic at a wine tasting. And I know about glucose levels and simple and complex sugars and carbs; I have a tiny nephew with brittle Type 1 diabetes. He almost dies about every six months, even with his goddamm pump and the best mother/caretaker/doctor triefecta I’ve ever witnessed.

Personal health can be tricky. I have no food, or even life advice other than to listen to your body, and beware of simple answers to complicated questions. Bodies, food, life, politics, relationships, etc, they ARE complicated, I’m sorry but they are. Thoughtful, complex answers aren’t good clickbait though, so people will tell you otherwise. I mean, geez, I’d freakin love a bulleted summary, like, This Short, Pithy List Works For Everyone, Every Life, Every Body. I would love ten easy ways of How To Do It, How To Figure Out This Goddamm Life, Once And For All, Please Someone Tell Me.

Like, the addiction thing. I very occasionally like cannabis, especially the Girl Scout Cookies one, but some strains make me too introspective and I spiral into Scandinavian Thoughts, which I fight against anyway, so I can’t just do any old thing. And I loathe the smell of pot, and the smoke really is very harsh for your lungs [also don’t @me about filters, it absolutely IS hard on lungs to just smoke it, there are better ways of getting it in your system]. I don’t like the taste or smell of alcohol [except this one Italian alcoholic fizz that tastes like expensive lemon or grapefruit soda, and it has a ton of sugar, natch], and even though I like the mellow feeling after one drink, I’m sound asleep after two. I can take alcohol or leave it, so i mostly leave it. But candy, or chocolate cake, or cookies, all the really good shit, my good, dear, beloved friend Sugar, the best invention in the world, THAT’S THE THING I’M KIND OF GENUINELY ADDICTED TO, THAT’S THE THING THAT REALLY AFFECTS MY SPECIFIC AND OVERALL HEALTH. The thing I can never get enough of, can’t seem to manage in small doses, am always thinking about, goddamm it. But I can eat these pretzels, and stop when I’m full, and it’s all good. I was always hungry before, could never feel full in my body or brain. I didn’t just want dessert or candy all the time, I could never have enough of it. Like if you put a beautifully cooked meal in front of me and told me I could have it for free, or I could pay a dollar for an old, dried out, shitty candy bar, I’d pay, no question. Like for real, I have a sugar thing. It’s humbling and maddening to realize, and like I said, it’s improved my health since I’ve started dealing with it).

I really just wanted to recommend this gas station for their excellent stock, and to say, these prezels are unusual and worth a try and I’ll fuck off now.