#forgotten retail
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BEST! Department store.
#dead retail#retail#80s#90s#interior design#80s interior#vintage retail#department store#forgotten retail
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I love a good The Bon-Ton and a good mall plant
#cranberry mall#photography#retail#dead mall#dead malls#deadmall#mall#malls#shopping mall#shopping malls#retail apocalypse#dead mall series#exploration#explore#vintage#retrowave#retro#vaporwave#forgotten places#bon ton#places#mall plants#plants
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Part Two
Summary: When John gets an unexpected invite to his ex-wife’s wedding, he scrambles to find a suitable date to take with him to ward off old ghosts from his past.
Notes: trans John, fat reader, subtle transphobia from minor characters
John was sat in his flat watching a Match of the Day rerun for a football game he’d missed while away when his phone buzzed on the kitchen counter.
His head swivelled over to it to see if it buzzed again, determining it unimportant enough to ignore for the time being when it stayed silent. Kate always called, so it wasn’t work and anyone else that was texting him after 9pm could wait.
It buzzed a second time, then a third and a fourth in quick succession and he felt curiosity twinge at the base of his skull. He pushed himself up, ignoring when one of his knees popped, and grabbed his phone.
Your name flashed up on the screen and he opened the chat without hesitation.
>> the photos from today, don’t forget to swap them out :)
He flicked through the photos you’d sent before picking one at random to save.
John sat back on his couch and agonised over swapping his lock screen.
It was currently an old photo of Charlotte from their honeymoon, and it had stayed that way this entire time in spite of the divorce. He had kept her there even when he’d removed her photos from his desk and was unable to put any up in his new flat. His little secret. Though he knew Kate had seen it despite his best efforts to leave his civilian phone at his flat or turned off during his office hours.
But now…
He felt almost queasy as he selected the new photo. It felt like the first of many final nails in the relationship’s coffin that John would have to deal with over the next month in the lead up to Charlotte’s big day.
It felt like he was mourning a relationship already six years dead.
---
John adapted quickly to seeing your face on his phone screen at the end of the day over the next two weeks, even if he did miss seeing Charlotte’s cheery smile, and found it just as easy to accept seeing your name pop up more and more frequently when you messaged with a new question you’d thought of regarding the wedding or your fake relationship.
It was easy to talk to you, he found. Easy to let his guard down just a tinge and to try and bury the hurt he felt.
>> what’s a childhood story you’d have told me about a couple months in?
<< I fell out of a tree when I was 12, was meant to be grounded at the time so I had to walk home with broken ribs and a scraped up arm and leg. Tried to pretend nothing had happened when my mum got back from work, but it didn’t fool her.
>> i broke my arm climbing a tree too, maybe one of our dates should’ve been at a forest climbing adventure place lol
<< You wouldn’t have wanted to be wined and dined?
>> sure but it can get a little boring
>> you wouldn’t have wanted to hypothetically stare at my arse cinched in climbing gear?
>> were there food options for the wedding? like on planes? i’m not a veggie so you dodged a bullet if you chose a main with meat but i do love pasta if we’re able to swap last minute
<< Everyone loves pasta.
<< And no, think it’s an open buffet.
>> i’ll bring a doggy bag for snacks on the way home then
>> waste not, want not
<< Say that in front of my dad and he might just add you to his will.
>> this is the dress I have in mind, what do you think?
<< Good choice.
>> glowing praise, john, i’ll take that as it won’t cause a scandal among the locals
<< Don’t think you’ll be the one causing a scandal, Sunshine.
It was in a rare occasion he’d texted you first that you arranged to meet up a second time. He’d asked about the plans you’d mentioned a few days back and was currently waiting for a reply while he tried to slog through his own work.
>> was super excited for the play today but I think I might have to cancel my tickets, my friend was driving us there but her kid has gotten sick so she can’t go now :/
<< Where were you going?
>> it’s at a park on the other side of the city with the outdoor stage, i could grab a couple of buses but i don’t know if i’d make it in time
John put down the dry sandwich he was eating and looked at the meeting reports he’d been ignoring for the last ten minutes while texting you.
<< I’ll come pick you up.
>> really??
<< Sure. Send me your address and I’ll be there soon, Sunshine.
John had barely parked up outside your house before you were opening the door and giving him an excited smile and wave.
“I love stuff like this anyway, but this community group have put on some amazing portrayals of Shakespeare’s plays over the years despite their low budget and they make it so accessible with cheap tickets and the outdoor venue. It’s cut down so the teens performing have a better chance at remembering their lines, but it’s always one hell of a forty-five minute show. I think it’s Othello this time, but honestly I’d watch anything,” you rambled as you buckled your seatbelt. “It’s always good to support local art.”
“So we’re seeing Shakespeare?” John confirmed.
“It’s at the open air theatre inside the park.”
“Been a while since I went to the theatre, longer than that since I’ve been in a park.”
“What do you do in your off time?” You asked with a snort.
“Don’t get much off time,” John said easily, unbothered. It was him after all that had decided work would become his priority.
“Well then I’m glad we’re getting to see this together,” you said. “I’ve had a pretty long week too.”
“Hm?”
At his inquisitive hum you fell into complaining about your managers and the long, tiring shifts you pulled.
It didn’t take you long in the car to get to the park however and you were soon jumping out. You gaped a little when John got out and joined you at the front of the car.
“Holy hell you’re tall, shit a brick,” you said, staring. You’d noticed he was broad at the café and he seemed to fill the cab of his pick-up, but he’d been slumped and seated both times so you’d assumed he was maybe creeping just below 6’ and the rest was his attitude that made him seem all encompassing. Looking at him stood up to his full height now was something else, even as he tucked his chin down and slumped his shoulders to speak with you. “I think we’ll have to sit at the back for this or someone might complain.”
John rolled his eyes but you saw the hint of a smile play at his lips as he agreed.
You led him eagerly to the crowd you could see gathering at the entrance of the outdoor stage; the front four rows of the small open air auditorium had been unfolded for the event, suggesting the size of the crowd expected. You both elected to take a seat on the back row as others started to head to the front, but he nudged you fondly when he saw you shift excitedly waiting for it to start.
John pulled out his phone when he felt it buzz in his pocket, but put it back when he saw it was just a reminder to sort out his tux for the wedding.
“Cute pic,” you said with a sly smile when you caught his lock screen. “We should take another, might be more convincing if we have more than one photo of us doing stuff together, right?”
John leant into your side and hesitantly wrapped his arm around you, stiff where it draped over the back of your seat, for the photo.
You were no better, your smile suddenly tight at the corners as you took a quick snap. You held your breath until he moved back, his aftershave surprisingly enticing and the warmth and weight of his arm too inviting.
It wouldn’t do for you to become attracted to John, not that it was something you could control, you knew. But maybe if you just wished it hard enough it wouldn’t make the weekend away with him more difficult than it had to be; falling for a man still blatantly in love with his ex never ended well for anyone.
You smiled a little weakly at him when nudged you again, nodding at the community group making their way onto the stage in front of the clapping crowd.
Maybe attraction would be fine you decided, already knowing how impulsively forgetful and weak-willed you got when your vibrator was between your legs - you could already imagine his name slipping through loose lips, and you couldn’t blame yourself for it as you sneakily took in his side profile - just as long as there were no real feelings from your side.
---
You’d graduated from texting to calling when John mentioned one night that he found it hard to multitask while at work. You’d offered to leave him alone and talk to him once he was done later but he’d been quick to interrupt, said instead that although he couldn’t text and write at the same time, he’d be fine talking and writing.
It’s how he found himself sat at his desk with his phone propped next to him on speaker, listening to you complain about the shitty restaurants near your work.
“I need to get back into meal prepping, or at least start buying something nicer pre-made to bring for lunch. If I have to eat another Greggs meal deal I think I’ll throw up, John,” you bemoaned.
“There’s a new place just opened up ‘round the corner to you, you know?” He said, checking over his team’s reports before signing them off. At your interested hum he continued. “Greek place I think. The sergeants went the other day, said it was a good menu and they’re usually quite picky about where they spend their free time together.”
“That sounds perfect, I’ll meet you there in twenty?” You asked rhetorically, already gathering your stuff to take your lunch break. “I can order for us both in case it takes you longer so it’ll be served by time you arrive. See you in a bit, bye!” You didn’t wait for him to confirm or reply in any capacity, too excited for a delicious lunch.
John stared down at his phone where the screen fell black through lack of use at the ended call. He took a moment to recount the conversation and where he’d gotten mixed up before reluctantly dropping his pen and grabbing his coat and keys.
He stopped by Simon’s office on his way out.
“I’m heading out for a quick lunch, won’t be back in time for that meeting with Laswell after all so you’ll need to take notes.” He waited for Simon’s nod before knocking once on the doorframe in thanks and leaving.
Sure he could’ve just sent you a quick text to correct you, or rang you back to explain it was just a recommendation and he didn’t have the time to join you.
But he didn’t want to. He wanted to go eat Greek food with you until you were humming happily and rubbing your soft stomach, comfortably full on more than a lukewarm pasty and sad looking iced donut. He wanted to hear about your day at work so far and what you’d been up to with your friends on Saturday evening when your replies had slowed down.
He wanted.
It had been a long time since John had felt that way. Given most of the people he’d consider friends were people he worked with and kept their personal lives close to their chests, it wasn’t often he wanted to do much more than spend a couple hours in a pub after a rough mission with them.
You were quickly solidifying yourself a space in John’s life as a friend, whether you knew it or not. Whether you liked it or not. And as a result, he didn’t want to leave you to eat on your own knowing you to be a social butterfly, even after such a short time. John was known to be protective - some had said possessive - of those he considered his. And being his friend meant that you would given the same effort of care and consideration that he gave his team, it just needed to be applied differently.
It wouldn’t be through proud shoulder pats after a mission well-done or through unshakeable confidence and trust when he put his life on the line stood side-by-side with the 141.
No, it would be pulling up to hole in the wall restaurants last minute so that you could spend your lunch a little happier than you were when you were sat at your desk.
He found you sat at the back table, the seat facing the front windows and door left free for him to take with silent appreciation.
The food was as good as Gaz and Soap had promised it would be and the sight of you scarfing down baklava before you had to head back to work had him grinning into his glass.
“Christ, I might have to get a to-go box of this for tonight,” you groaned lowly.
“Big plans?” John asked, clearing his throat.
“Just some DIY I’ve been putting off around the house, figure if I entice myself with a treat for after it’s done I’ll be more likely to actually do it.” You go to take your last bite before pausing and pointing at John. “And before you say it, I realise it sounds like how you train a puppy.”
John snorted, but a frown pulled low on his brow. “What needs fixing?”
“My front door is scraping low when I open it, hinges are loose I think. Nothing major but I’d rather not fuck it up, you know? But if I leave it any longer then I’ll need to pay someone to deal with some real damage,” you sighed. “So I’ve borrowed my neighbour’s drill.”
“I’ll do it for ya,” John offered out of nowhere.
“What? No, you don’t have to, you’re busy,” you declined.
“It’s fine, I’ll pop by later tonight. Just let me know when you’re home and I’ll swing by and sort it.”
“I, uh, ok. Sure, thanks, John. I appreciate it,” you said with a grateful, if not bemused, smile.
---
As soon as you opened the door that evening, John noticed how the bottom caught.
“Hi, do you want a drink? A tea?” You offered as you let him in.
“I’d love one, thanks, Sunshine.” He stepped inside and placed his drill case by the doorframe.
“Oh, you brought your own drill? You didn’t have to go home for it, did you?” You fretted as you headed towards the kitchen. “Did I not mention I’d borrowed my neighbour’s?”
“You did. But this was in the back of the truck from Simon borrowing it, it’s not a big deal,” John lied. He’d stopped off to grab it after your lunch together. “Wasn’t sure what your neighbour’s drill was going to be like, but I know this’ll get the job done proper.”
You bit back an amused smile and hummed your assent down the hall as you waited for the electric kettle to boil.
“Thanks again for helping out, John. I can get by doing my own DIY usually; not to brag but I’m kind of a pro at assembling IKEA furniture. Sometimes though it helps having a second person look it over too.” You walked back to the front door as you spoke and held his tea for him as he set up the drill to match the screws in the door.
“It’s no hassle,” he said before setting to work.
A quick three minutes later your door was once again in full working order, no longer sticking when it swung open and closed.
“Good as new,” he said. You passed him his drink, still hot, and grinned, leading him to sit on the couch for a moment. “If y’need anything else fixing up or looking at, just let me know. I’d be happy to help.”
“Opened the floodgates with that offer. You’ll be regretting it soon enough,” you said with a laugh. “This place is a bit of a fixer-upper, ‘s why I could afford it in the first place.”
“You’ve done a good job with it,” he said earnestly, looking around the cosy living room. Would be better if you weren’t alone, he thought suddenly, unbidden. He took a deep sip of his drink and avoided eye contact. “I like being useful, you might as well take advantage of it since no one else is at the moment.”
You smiled softly. “That’s all the permission I need.”
His phone vibrated in his pocket and he slipped it out to see a text from his mum.
>> Make sure your date isn’t wearing white, luv. I’m sure she’s a lovely girl, but we wouldn’t want to spoil Charlotte’s day would we? xxx
<< Her dress is green, nothing to worry about mum. xx
>> Green is a bold choice, must be quite the lady to pull that off! Give her my love. xxx
John sighed as he put his phone down and caught your eye in his peripheral.
He smiled tiredly to ease your worried frown.
“Just my mum checking in, she gives you her love,” he said.
“Mm. She gives you a headache,” you pointed out. “Wedding shit still?”
“It’s her prime focus right now. It’ll be done soon.”
“You want a paracetamol? I’ll top up your tea.” You reached forward for his empty cup.
“Got something stronger?” John asked hopefully.
You winced. “I’ve got a gin ‘n’ tonic in a can that my friend left the other day? Can’t even offer you a strong coffee because it’s decaf.”
“Jesus,” he groaned through a laugh. “Another tea it is.”
---
The morning of the wedding came sooner than you’d expected. The dress that you’d carefully hung on your wardrobe door to avoid creases all those weeks ago would finally be put to use.
You got up early enough to get yourself ready, nervousness unsettling your stomach enough that you stuck to only a slice of toast for breakfast with a strong coffee.
>> Setting off now, I’ll be at yours in 20.
<< you mean you’ll be here by 0900 🫡
>> Funny.
>> See you soon.
You chuckled to yourself as you grabbed your things so you were ready to go when John arrived and double checked everything was locked up for the weekend.
The knock on your door had your heart jump and pound double-time in your chest before you shook your hands out and told yourself to fucking chill. It was just John.
“Hi, you ready to— oh, you look, uhm…” John trailed off as he took in the flowing silk dress you’d bought. He’d seen it before, of course, but now seeing you in it and the way it clung to your curves and highlighted your plush tummy and wide hips had his tongue heavy and lost in his mouth. He swallowed thickly as he looked back up to your face, trying not to linger on the plunged neckline and what it did for your tits, and felt his cheeks redden when he noticed your own flustered, wide-eyed look as you stood and watched him. “You look very nice,” he finished lamely.
“Right, good, thanks.” You tried to force a laugh but your throat felt too dry, even as you grinned at his red cheeks. “You clean up pretty well too,” you said instead and reached your hand out to brush against the neatened trim of his beard, his muttonchops less pronounced.
He stiffened at the unexpected touch, not disliking it, but a memory of Charlotte doing something similar had him flinching back. Charlotte, he remembered, would usually only rub at his beard with a frown and ask when he was going to go clean shaven again.
You didn’t know that however and you snatched your hand back to your side as you felt a chill drop from your chest down to your toes like a bucket of cold water. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have done that,” you apologised.
“No, it’s fine. Just caught me off guard,” he said, trying to ease your suddenly tense shoulders and cursing himself for getting lost in old memories.
He led you to the car and held open the door for you, smiling when you thanked him and tucked in your dress to avoid its long length getting trapped in the door.
Once he was sat in the drivers seat he hesitated for a moment before turning to face you.
“‘M glad you like it,” he said with a quick gesture to his beard. “I was thinking about shaving it off for the occasion.”
You winced reflexively at the thought, teeth gritted and bared as you tried to picture him without facial hair. He let out a deep rumble of a laugh, throaty and unfiltered, as you tried to square your face back to a neutral expression, though your eyebrows wouldn’t pull back from their frown.
“I’m sure that would’ve looked… sweet,” you hedged carefully.
John only snorted.
You huffed and rolled your eyes. “Ok I’m a terrible liar,” you started, glaring when John muttered an amused, you don’t say. “If you want to shave and like how it looks, then we can detour back to yours and I’m sure you’ll look just as handsome in whatever photos you’re forced to pose for. But if you’re asking for my opinion? Then I think this suits you better, it’s more distinguished. You’d have looked too much like a banker if you’d shaved and wore a suit,” you said with an exaggerated shiver.
John hummed a chuckle, his shoulders shaking with it. “I’m sure the word you’re thinking of rhymes with banker, Sunshine.”
It was your turn to snort a laugh at that.
“Your words, not mine, John.”
“Cheeky. Put your bloody seatbelt on,” he huffed, a smile pulling at his lips as he started the car. “Suddenly thinking this drive might feel ten times longer than usual for some reason.”
You rolled your eyes and didn’t dignify his jab with a response. Tried not to focus on your pulse racing in excitement.
masterlist
#john price x reader#went to an open air theatre a few weeks back and it was so fucking cool i had to add it in#suggested soapgaz#because i can’t help myself lmaooo#sorry everyone i fucking hate greggs i think its overpriced and tastes like cardboard#when i worked retail its all i ate and i wanted to kms and now im my current job we get donations from like whatever’s left from#the day before which means for the last six years my car has smelt like greggs and sometimes when i’ve forgotten lunch or tea at work#(depending on the hours im on) i’ve had to fucking eat greggs bc there was nothing else >:( so yeah hate that shit it’s always disappointin#trans john price#fat reader#john price
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i have a playful headcanon that when simon and baz were going through puberty, simon was really pissed off because it seemed like baz just went away one summer and came back with his voice perfectly even and much deeper.
(simon was cracking on every third word, and baz never let him hear the end of it)
in reality baz spent his whole summer desperately training his voice lower and trying to teach himself to avoid his break-octave because he figured that the instant he squeaked mid-insult he would lose all credibility forever.
#also to the person who resent their ask I RPOMISE IM GETTING TO IT#i drove 3 hours round trip two days in a row and had an insurance company panic attack this week#four clerks understaffed american healthcare system playing chicken with my demise the horrors of the retail holidays looming ever nearer#I HAVENT FORGOTTEN
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As the only surviving shopping district in Forgotten Hollow, Garliclauter Place has had many different faces over the years. Today it houses two businesses that are still in operation: a cozy book store with a variety of titles available for leisure or for the start of the school year, and a family-owned mini market with a wide variety of fresh foods for on the go. If you are interested in bringing life back to unit number three, contact Plumbob Realty today to make an offer!
INFORMATION & DOWNLOAD BELOW ↓
Packs I Used (Furnished version):
Packs I Used (Unfurnished version):
This build is CC Free! It is listed as a "Residential" lot for your guys' ease. I personally have it as a business "Retail" lot in my game that my sims also live in, but you can operate it as really anything you want!
I haven't ran into any issues while playing personally, but I haven't formally play-tested every single feature in the build! The worst issue you might run into is having to delete an object though, so no need to fret. I will tell you that the ladders to the roof are blocked by the half wall - there's nothing up there for my sims so the ladder is really just there for show (to imitate scaffolding). If you want your sim to be able to get on the roof, just delete the roof's wall in front of the ladder!
TOU: All I ask is that 1. you do not reupload and claim the build as your own (yes, even if you tweak it a little…) and 2. you tag me if you use it! I would love to see this in other people’s games and saves, that’s why I’m sharing it! <3
Additional screenshots are on my Patreon post. Let me know if there are any in-game issues!
DL: Patreon (always free)
+ @pancakesrealty, @publicvanillabuilds
#forgotten hollow#ts4#simblr#ts4 build#ts4 build mode#ts4 download#the sims 4#sims 4#ts4 lots#ts4 residential#ts4 retail#ts4 dl#ts4 forgotten hollow#ts4 vampires#mybuilds
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Finally remembered to wait until Wednesday to post a snippet. I promise this is almost done (even though it was already, but I had to change something so it'd fit better -- it does but I've been in editing hell for the last few weeks.)
#hazbin hotel#hazbin alastor#hazbin lucifer#alastor#lucifer morningstar#listen i work retail and we are in holiday hell rn#i am functioning enough to do work not to write#im getting back to it though#finished the big scene i needed to edit so now just little touch ups#and another scene but thats fine#ill deal with that another time#this will come out eventually i havent forgotten about it#radioapple#lucifer x alastor#appleradio#isnt it lovely
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Weeee I got my first in person job interview.
#fingies crossed i dont spill my spaghetti#its just at a retail store...and it's sport related which *looks at myself in the mirror* uh im not exactly a skinny legend or a fitness nu#BUT im excited to see what this leads to#just a soft reminder the animation industry sucks and is not at all sustainable i wish people stopped glorifying it#unless youre consistently working your arms off or you happen to have big dick connections youre forgotten#looking forward to beginning my normie wage slavery
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I GOT THE JOB LETS. FUCKING. GOOOO
#EMPLOYMENT. which i loathe. BUT MONEY. WHICH I LOVE#i get my induction on friday ERM i hope they havent forgotten i am still at school but! WHO GIVE A SHIT#YAYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#jen's retail era is making a comeback
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i am absolutely fuming at myself because instead of working on any of my other wips (the guilt i feel re johnny's hc for ddaf is nearly paralysing) i've started to really flesh out the outline i have for an au based on bbc ghosts.
#pfh wips#for the love of god p just pick a wip and stick to it until it's finished#apologies to those of you waiting for more ddaf or retail hell au i haven't forgotten but the brain worms are wriggling over this
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See the further irony is:
That in using 'Mall Goth Sauron' as the take on Dark Willow over 'misogynist has character randomly killed for LULZ' it also allows for greater accountability on the one hand and for Season 7 to thematically focus on repairing all this damage in the midst of facing an enemy of shadows reliant on lies to further itself. The only way to break the Druj is the absolute Truth in a very Zoroastrian sense. Characters don't get to neatly skip past accountability for their actions, and this would spiral over into further later seasons with the essential reality that in an otherwise lower-level setting this one random girl from California is a Dark Phoenix-tier reality warper and the most powerful person on the planet, or the universe.
And the questions of how that power could and should be employed on the one hand and that Willow is essentially a Doctor Strange type who beats up Gods and Eldritch Abominations for her regular line of work where her counterparts deal with the more 'street level' crises would in turn be the logical conclusion of where the show ends. She doesn't do as much physical fighting for the same reason that Stephen Strange never uses magic to go punch the Hulk in the face, her narrative role is ultimately that of Sorceress Supreme of Earth, with literally nobody in an ancient established war anticipating that this one random ginger from California was and is the new Sorceress Supreme and that if they had had such awareness the realities are that this power would and could have taken worse forms.
Unfortunately for the world, the reality too is that it is a shy computer geek who has a not at all subtle dark side and the usual teenage anxieties and insecurities given the equivalent of being able to reliably actually do things other people might dream of but can never do.
But again as long as Dawn Summers being a good thing is a narrative convention that's established memory magic is a poor choice to show the corrupting effects of reality-warping. It's a case of 'yes as established in canon all of this is true for that one season but then they decided to retcon it, so the fans are not obligated to care about it any more than the canon does about this itself.'
#willow rosenberg#tara maclay#dawn summers#you will never convince me as long as Dawn Summers is a plot device that 'memory magic unforgivable' is anything but bad writing#it was the choice used but there are other equally toxic things that could have been done instead#the basic theme of 'very powerful person decides things for another in an abusive fashion' works just as well without it#Tara's growth arc in refusing to tolerate abuse even from the person who brought her out of her shell can stand perfectly fine#it works even better with a budding Sauron than abruptly deciding 'wholesale memory rewrites good retail unforgivable.'#killing Tara off also denies her any sense of closure or ability to get that closure with the person who does this#the entire element here with the way things went down is bad writing from Point A to point Z#and it's also easily forgotten but Tara wasn't in fact intended to be Willow's love interest#she was replacement Willow for sympathy points#her entire arc as such became Willow X Tara but it was a choice from actor chemistry#So in giving Tara a role besides 'Willow's Girlfriend' it arguably does better by her character#tara x willow#btvs#and yes yes the 'scale changes things' argument is true but only to a point#it's really no different to introduce Dawn than what Willow did#if the retail is wrong so is the wholesale and the decisions to make this that point of no return is an avoidable mistake#plus honestly imagine a Season 7 Tara going 'sweetie no' and a Season 7 Willow dealing with those consequences in real time#equally one can have Tara's cold turkey approach stick exactly as it was#and serve as her role in the time bomb because she's a product of an abusive family and not an infallible moral guide#she rightly sees the problem and at least tries to address it when nobody else did#but unfortunately her solution was pouring gasoline on the fire and then vacating the range where the fire would burn#still further between that and Willow being human enough to resent being told to take that pain and do it going it alone#there'd be plenty of reasons for a surviving Tara and Willow to spend season 7 broken up as is#Tara would not at all be wrong to be wary and not want to touch reformed Sauron with a 400 foot pole#Willow equally would resent someone whose bad advice helped create the problem and who evades any recognition thereof#good old fashioned drama with entirely human motives
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everything going exceptionally weird lately. got lsuch low bloog sugar i lost my vision for like 20 minutes n when it came back i was unable to orocess anything i could see n was struggling to think for another hr n i still feel really wrird. lost sensation in my arms for a bit too (they were numb n then tight i felt it in my hands n then all the way up my shoulders) n took a nap n it helped but still scary to experience n that that can just happen just bc i wasnt paying attention to what i was eating. fell asleep watching needle park while my vision was still on the buffer n woke up. fell asleep again to scarecrow n dda. i think im a person again
#its v hard to describe the disorientation?#i was having like blobs of visual snow n then couldnt see half my vision#n then when it came back it was like#i could see but i was blind#my brain could not process new information#i was looking at my phone screen able to go ok i know its bobby i have a bobby axel lockscreen but i couldnt actually see it in front of me#i was struggling to talk too all i could do was pace the living room bc sitting still scared me more#i have this mild migraine still but i can see again so#n i can think again?#the insbility to think was scary but i also wasnt fully able to get scared like it was STRONG dissociation kickin in#i hope this makes sense ive never experienced low blood sugar THAT bad b4#as it was happening i was feeling this unbearable loneliness n grief bc ive been feeling both a lot lately#like obviously im fine im not dying but panic brain was like well if u do die u die alone n forgotten rn#n it is making me feel so distant from everything still idk#gonna finish tidying my room up n write this weekend#work on my commissions. idk. keep applying for jobs n hooe i get a callback b4 i have to work retail or a factory job again#av.txt#i should say its like i never went acrually blind i always had half my vision n ive had half of it go b4 when tired n hungry#but never THAT bad n never also w the confusion
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Ladies and gentlemen, please offer your undivided attention to the one true mall plant. All other mall plants bow to its glory. I invite you to sit in the conversation pit and take in the view 🖤
It has a plaque, but I guess someone stole it. What did you used to say, king?
#cranberry mall#photography#retail#dead mall#dead malls#deadmall#mall#malls#shopping mall#shopping malls#retail apocalypse#dead mall series#exploration#explore#rust belt#rural america#rural#pittsburgh#pennsylvania#forgotten places#time capsule#70s#70s aesthetic#aesthetic
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crying and screaming bc i just wanna write but something is always in the way >:(
#* ooc.#retail was ass but i got all the hours i needed in 3-4 days and could use the rest of the week to write ldkfgj#NOW my big girl job doesnt allow me that pleasure#but anyway i have a bunch of memes still but i promise i havent forgotten anyone <3#will probs get to a lot more tomorrow <3
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me: starts another retail customer service job
my anxiety: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
#ive forgotten just how grumpy and shitty customers can be#i once again reitterate i no longer wish to work in retail#pls i want to get this receptionist job pls
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Chiron persona chart obs
WARNING: BRIEF MENTIONS OF ED, S*ICIDE, S*XUAL AB*SE. I HIGHLY RECOMMEND NOT TO READ THIS POST IF YOU'RE VERY SENSITIVE thank you
Stelliums show us where our main trauma or wound lies:
Stellium in Aries/1st house - body image issues/body dysmorphia, hating ones face and wanting to change it at all cost, being so focused on ones trauma that it results in excessive independence
Stellium in Taurus/2nd house - self worth issues, hating ones voice and/or being made fun of for how ones voice sounds, excessive shopping due to fear of having nothing, having stash of cash hidden everywhere in the house due to being scared of getting robbed
Stellium in Gemini/3rd house - being too scared to speak to others, hating the way you express yourself, being an overachiever at school due to fear of being seen as "stupid", fear of being run over by a bicycle or a car
Stellium in Cancer/4rd house - family problems (divorced parents, one of the parents is out of the picture for whatever reason, family members dealing with addictions, family abuse), issues when it comes to comforting yourself in times of crisis, HEAVY abandonment issues
Stellium in Leo/5th house - had to grow up too fast instead of enjoying childhood, fear of not being "the perfect parent", fear of not making it in the industry (for those pursing creative careers or following their passions), issues regarding getting pregnant and delivering a child, fear of being burned by the sun or by fire
Stellium in Virog/6th house - fear of contacting an incurable disease, issues regarding eating disorders, trauma regarding messy spaces, which results in OCD
Stellium in Libra/7th house - issues caused by getting cheated in a relationship, fear of trusting someone in a one-on-one connection, trauma resulted from business affairs which have gone wrong
Stellium in Scoprio/8th house - fear of death, issues caused by sexual trauma/sexual abuse, grooming, stalking, human trafficking, mysterious disappearances, divorce, taxes, loans
Stellium in Sagittarius/9th house - fear of not being able to experience everything one has always wanted, issues caused by not living to ones full potential, fear of travelling too far away, religious trauma
Stellium in Capricorn/10th house - fear of being forgotten and not standing out, issues regarding not looking & acting in a professional manner when needed, fear of not being promoted in ones career, the trauma is very visible to the public
Stellium in Aquarius/11th house - fear of not fitting in a crowd or a friend group, issues regarding being part of LGBTQ+ or a subculture often dismissed (POC, people with disabilities, orphanage kids, emos), trauma related to the country's government and (possible) implications in war, fear of dying in a natural disaster (earthquake, tsunami, volcano), fear of dying by electrocution or in an airplane crash
Stellium in Pisces/12th house - fear of being admitted to a prison, asylum or nursing home, having frequent thoughts of unaliving onself, fear of drowning, fear of what happens after death, fear of being misunderstood or made fun of for hearing voices and seeing things which aren't real
Moon shows us how we process our trauma and wounds:
Moon in Aries/1st house : screams, throws things around (maybe also breaks a few things), if anyone reminds them of their wounds/traumas, they'd literally break that person's neck; they might recklessly drive, play with fire or drink excessively out of anger
Moon in Taurus/2nd house : resorts to retail therapy, cooks their favourite meals, gets some comfy pillow and blankets and watches their favourite show; they're slow to heal their wounds, but they manage to do so
Moon in Gemini/3rd house : overanalyzes what happened to the point that they've thought of every scenario possible, (if they have more than one wound/trauma) switches between wounds, is usually open about their wounds and traumas with siblings and acquaintances
Moon in Cancer/4th house : cries 24/7, acts distant with people who are not close to them and defensive with those who want to talk about their feelings; they tend to have very, very unhealthy coping mechanisms (aka they resort to self-harm)
Moon in Leo/5th house : transforms their pain & wounds into a form of art - whether it's through dancing, painting, singing, acting, photography, videography; sometimes they might not recognize how much their past affects them, especially around others, they boast about how "it wasn't that bad" even though they're clearly affected by what happened
Moon in Virgo/6th house : focuses on the details, what they could have done better and what they didn't, easily becomes anxious, cleaning the house becomes a form of therapy for them; in case of physical wounds, they document themselves very well (sometimes they are even able to heal themselves, since this Moon sign in Chiron persona chart has a sort of 6th sense about medicinal procedures)
Moon in Libra/7th house : their s/o knows every pain, wound and traumas they've ever experienced, analyzes the past in a logical manner and tries to find a healthy coping mechanism, without hurting anyone else in the process; listens to sad, romantic songs
Moon in Scorpio/8th house : if someone else is guilty for their wounds/traumas, they're going to plot revenge and execute their plan in a discreet manner; often jealous, they might pursue fwb connections to stop thinking about their pain; the ones who manage to deal with their past in a healthy manner become a completely different person in the process
Moon in Sagittarius/9th house : dealing with their wounds/traumas opens a new world for them, they end up adopting a new set of beliefs as a coping mechanism, travelling to another country to get some space from their surroundings helps them heal
Moon in Capricorn/10th house : replays the past over and over again, they numb their emotions, if asked about their wounds/traumas, they answer very stoic; they also tend to be more realistic and don't like to tell themselves lies or hear lies about their trauma
Moon in Aquarius/11th house : resorts to technology to cope with the pain, is usually open about their wounds and traumas with their friends or on social media, but not with family; they might try some unusual coping mechanisms
Moon in Pisces/12th house : they isolate themselves from everyone in order to cope with the pain, meditation and breathing techniques are their to-go methods of calming their anxiety down; if they don't manage to cope in a healthy way, they dissociate and go through a depersonalization process or an addiction takes over them (drinking, smoking, they overuse medication etc.)
Jupiter shows us where we're blessed, but fail to see. The stronger the modality, the more obvious it is to other people.
♃ Jupiter in fixed signs (Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, Aquarius) and/or fixed houses (2nd house, 5th house, 8th house, 11th house) are extremely blessed and everyone is able to notice, but the native.
♃ Jupiter in cardinal signs (Aries, Cancer, Libra, Capricorn) and/or cardinal houses (1st house, 4th house, 7th house, 11th house) are blessed, but only a specific category of people notice it.
♃ Jupiter in mutable signs (Gemini, Virgo, Sagittarius, Pisces) and/or mutable houses (3rd house, 6th house, 9th house, 12th house) are still blessed, but the effect is hardly noticeable to anyone.
Those with:
Grand Trine/Kite/Yod (Finger of God)
Sun, Jupiter, North Node and ruler of the chart conjuncting MC and/or placed in 10th/11th house (minimum 2 placements)
Stellium in 10th house/11th house
-> have got amazing healing abilites and often end up pursuing careers where they help & heal society (usually as doctors, therapists, spiritual advisors, social workers, advocates who actually make a difference, etc.) They usually become famous for their healing gifts.
Other small considerations:
Ascendant shows us how we are perceived at first glance when we are dealing with pain
IC shows us how we are perceived by our family (or in a safe, secluded place) when we are dealing with pain
DSC shows us how we are perceived by our partner or best friend when we are dealing with pain
MC shows us how we are perceived in public (or in our career) when we are dealing with pain
North Node shows us our salvation (where we need to focus on in order to heal)
🕊 Sun trine Moon & Sun sextile Moon individuals have an easier time healing their traumas and wounds
🕊 Sun opposite Saturn & Sun square Saturn individuals feel the need to rebel from their father/grandparents, norms that have been imposed on them, old customs & traditions, institutions/government, in order to heal themselves
#astro#astro community#astrology#astro placements#astro observations#astro posts#astroblr#astro blog#astro notes#persona chart#chiron#chiron persona chart
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Camp Daze: Available for Pre-Order Now! Releasing July 30th!
#Adult | #Colorado | #Apocalypse | #Contemporary | #Summer Camp | #Girls Camp | #Queer | #Multiple Queer Characters | #Isolation | #Nuclear War | #Hopeful Apocalypse | #The End of the World Isn't the End of Everything |
With summer winding down, the counselors at Camp Aspen Heart are counting the days until they go home to their own beds after weeks of songs and campouts and budding friendships. But a missing food delivery after the start of one of the last sessions sets off alarms in the isolated camp. With no easy way to contact the outside world Conifer, a survivalist who grew up going to the camp every summer before becoming a counselor herself, heads out to try and find out what is going on, only to be confronted with the unthinkable: a nuclear war has started, and they’ve been forgotten. Conifer was raised to survive the end of the world. Any end of the world. Except this one, alone in the woods with over a hundred-fifty kids to save and only a handful of other young counselors to help her.
You can find tons of links for where to buy the book on my website, and it is available through most online retailers in paperback, hardback, and ebook.
You can also buy it directly on my website, including a limited amount of the leftover Kickstarter special editions! The special editions include lots of lovely upgrades including foiling and a cloth binding!
#Queer Books#Book Recommendation#Self Publishing#Self Published#Original Writing#My Writing#Camp Daze
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