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#for as long as this plant keeps fighting i will keep fighting alongside it lol
softpine · 2 years
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cut my life into pieces this is my last resort
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leorawright · 2 years
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Maaaaay I request mercs with a S/O who is a botanist? Lmao during combat instead of weapons they summon plants like Ivy from the DC comics, lol but they look more like the chomp plants from mario hell they even give the mercs a mini chomp plant in a pot to keep them company their class name is literally "The Gardener" as they spend their free time outside tending to the different flowers out on the entrance to the base
P.S they have a green house that's next to the medbay called the "apothecary" where they have "Natural remedies" for upset stomachs or mild colds
Bro that's so cool!
Mercs with s/o who can summon plants
Scout
He'll sometimes stop whatever he was doing to watch you fight
He can't help it you're just to cool not to watch
He adores the way you make little flowers blow alongside the chaos that is the battlefield
Scout will also go to your greenhouse just to hang out with you
Soldier
He was skeptical about your fighting style until he saw you summon a Venus fly trap that swallowed your opponent
He'd definitely love it if you got him a mini chomp plant
He'll also praise your greenhouse since Medic doesn't really do little things like that
Demoman
He loves seeing people just get swallowed by your plants he thinks it's hilarious
He's also extremely careful if you give him a plant to keep all his bombs away from it so he doesn't hurt it
Demo often has hangovers so he's almost always in your greenhouse (definitely not because he wants to hang out with you)
Pyro
They'll love you forever if you get them a mini chomp plant
They adore all your plants and refuse to use they're flamethrower anywhere near them out of fest they'll accidentally burn your plants
They do often go to your greenhouse simply to hang out with you and smell the plants
Heavy
He's quiet intrigued by your plants
He's probably one of the best at taking care of a plant if you give it to him
He'll often come to your greenhouse when he's stressed because the smell from the plants helps calm him
Medic
He finds it absolutely delightful when you swallow someone with your plants
He'd adore a plant from you and will do everything in his power to keep it alive
He's also thankful for your greenhouse that way he doesn't have to deal with the small things and can focus on watching your plant doctor things
Sniper
He'll get super flustered if you propel yourself to his perch with your plants, give him a kiss, and leave
He'd definitely want a pitcher plant and he'd keep it alive for a long time
He likes your greenhouse when no one's there so he can hang out with you and your plants in peace
Spy
He has several plants scattered around his room from you that he's had for years
He doesn't keep any in his smoking room because he doesn't want the smoke the damage them
Spy often comes to your greenhouse to clear his lungs and his mind
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protokirby · 28 days
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So I had some kind of insane dream
First, a dream I had yesterday but forgot to talk about. It's also an insane one but way shorter.
There was a village of alligator people living in the sewers and at the end of the sewer tunnel the exit led to a beach. The beach was at an angle where it was a downwards hill to get to the ocean.
A giant Piers was rising from the sea about to terrorize the alligator people. Normal sized Piers was trying to fight the giant Piers alongside the alligator people.
Drayton was also there and he put a little effort into defending the alligator people. He picked up an inverted-color version of himself by the arms and spun him around to toss him.
Drayton was intending to make the inverted-color version of himself land on the giant Piers but he couldn't throw him that far and the inverted-color Drayton was just cartoonishly rolling down the hill of the beach.
Now for the recent dream
The dream starts out very self-aware with Carmine going to Drayton. She says the following to him: "You and Crispin are all buddy-buddy with the dreamer, right? Crispin is out somewhere and I need help from someone with experience." Drayton just silently stares at her like she's crazy from where he's sitting. Carmine adds: "Don't act all oblivious. I know all of that exists and you regularly get involved. Kieran fell into some other world and you're the only one I know who might be able to help."
Drayton then grins and stands up and I appear next to him, startling Carmine. Then I teleport us all to the world Kieran was trapped in. It was mostly jungle-like with beautiful plants and stuff but something about it felt like some kind of post-nuclear explosion wasteland somehow. Not really sure how else to describe it.
I don't remember a lot of what happened in between but at some point Carmine was under the spell of something and being aggressive in a vicious monster way because of it and Drayton was walking oddly. Like one foot was broken. I don't remember at all if those two things are connected though. So anyway I was helping Drayton walk for a little while before he just couldn't go on and he had to lie down on the ground. I just kinda stood next to him looking down for a little while having thoughts reminiscent of being an angst enjoyer and then shortly feeling bad about it at because in this case the fictional guy is suffering right in front of me and I'm…. Amused by it??! Like bruh keep that to the daydreams. Not to the actual imaginary friends. Well anyways I did come to my senses in the dream, albeit too many seconds later. I decided to teleport with him to a dream world like a replica of where I live irl.
It was a shed but for some reason the floor was all covered in water. It was still safer than the monster world. But Carmine unexpectedly ran through the portal I opened and the moment she touched water she transformed into a mermaid and I said "What, did you stand in the dang moon pool or somethin?!" I can't recall if I ever referenced something in a dream before like that. But anyhoo it was making a lot of noise and I didn't want my dream family knowing I can travel to other universes so I quickly picked up Drayton bridal style and kicked Carmine into a fresh portal back to the monster world before jumping in the portal myself.
After getting back to the monster world, Carmine was no longer a mermaid but she was still going berserk from whatever got in her head and she sprinted off somewhere out of sight while I was left alone with Drayton again. I regained some almost-awake level smarts long enough to manipulate the dream into restoring Drayton's broken leg but immediately after that I became my usual dumb dream-self again. Instead of going to help Carmine find Kieran, I chose to continue carrying Drayton bridal style while whimsically prancing around the landscape. I think Drayton was having fun lol.
The dream showed me what Carmine got up to after she sprinted away. She made it to where the king of the monsters was. The monsters in that world were all evil, though they could be reasoned with. Carmine snapped out of her trance and demanded that the king tell her where Kieran is. The king thought her boldness was amusing and offered to help her find Kieran.
She was told that he might be with one of his subordinates who all individually rule over something in the monster world. All those monster people who were the king's subordinates had names similar to what they ruled over. The only one I remember is one whose name was Madison who had a mansion. That's where they were checking first. But before that, the king wanted Carmine to dig up a crystal skull out of the ground. It was the king's car keys. They were going to the mansion by car.
I woke up before they got there.
tldr: I bring Drayton on a fun trip around a jungle/wasteland and Carmine gets demon possessed while attempting to de-isekai Kieran
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putting this one under a readmore cuz its a really long dream thats REALLY FUCKING LONG and kinda.. wierd so
god iwish i could rmemmbe the ppl in my dreams or any of the shit they b saying to me cuz its some like super heartfelt emoional and poignant shit sometimes....lol
ANWYAYS had a dream about
space?. and thsi facility. maybe it was a repurposed and restructured warehouse. or an indoor basketball court... maybe. alls i really remember about the inside of this building was thast it had like square mesh metal links (possibly 4-7cm in size) all along the walls of the inside and all sorts of plant life were growign in various places alongside it. there were various “shops” and facilities like monitor rooms dug out in the sides of the walls and refurbished to maintain the launching pad a safe distance from it. and like other stuff.... there were desks and matresses and computers all about the place but a nice amoutn of space inbetween each. as well as just an empty patch of ground that ppl would keep clear fo the sake of reducing traffic and like... leaving an open area for ppl to fight or do flips n shit
it started with the space section
this other person an i were traveling across space..... looking for something? or looking to get to a place to blow something up. mabye. alls i remmeber is that we were on some life or death grand ol mission for the sake of prolonging the lives n livelyhoods of the other ppl from our group(?) that were holed up in that facility.maybe..  im not sure. either way i only really remember the ending part of that section where i was loading myself up into this like cannon (which was the landing pad thing i mentioned earlier) for like launching ppl super hfar distances in space. it was connected to the ship and it was like 4 orange rails parallel to eachother  in an almost squarwe like shape and these rails would shoot a ball or pod, containing the person. it was like straight at first but as you went along it it got more swirly and squiggly like a crazy straw or even moreso cuz it like almost ran into itself a few times. i remember loading up the pod while i was in it and basically going backwards thru its entire track and as it reached various parts and bends of the track, it would play this beautiful medley and the other person, my co-pilot? who was on the ship we were riding up until all this time, was like talking to me thru the comms about how lovely it was.
i agreed with her and like told her to make sure you dont forget anything when its your turn to go thru the track. she said something else that made me wanna like cry alongside her cuz i thoguth i could hear it in her voice too. she laughed in a way that made me think she was deliberately planning on not coming back. then i reached the part of the track that connects directly to and inside the warehouse facility i mentioned earlier. this part of the track was just like a giant like pipe that could fit the ballpod and ran straight thru from the top o fthe cieling to the bottom of the floor. it also had plants running all along side it. i think the exit was on the floor liek a little opening in the side wher ethe ball can roll out a bit... i worried about how my comrade had laughed an what she wasp lanning but she showed up on the other side of the room and had some of our other friends trailing behind her. she was looking and twalking directly at me. smug as all hell. like as if i was supposed to knwo that the FUCK she was on about. it was so wierd to see her acting like this cuz before this we were thick as thieves. like we could trust eachother with our respective backs and could rely on one another to excel where the other falters and just like in general. i had respected her deeply up until this point and even still even after then cuz it was so fuckig outta nowhere. but iwanted to make sure nothing was actually... like goingon that i need to worry about. and like if there wasnt anything that couldnt be done about it yknow?
 i was standing in front ofmy own mattress up agains one of the walls beneath a window and said to her, “glad your like, here” cuz like irelaly was scared she was about to do some shit. n before i could ask what the fuck all that shit was bout, some of the other ppl made themselves at home on my matress and wer ealso staring at me. my fucking matress that iw as about to clean so i could fucking sleep on it since ppl were sooooooo used to doing this sorta shit ands spilling fFOOD and all sorts of other stuff on it. i was so annoyed by this cuz its not like my matress was the only one around here. maybe its cuzthey knew iwas about to clean it. who knows lol,
my plan to clean it btw was to hose it down with like a chemical reagent then hose it downs ome more with just water, then beat the FUCK outta it with this single punch technique that woulda knocked all the moisture right outta it like as if i had put it in the wash n dryer lol. anyways!~!!! i hadnt gotten to do that yet, as iw as thinking about how iwas going to clean it and why all these ppl are staring at me and all that when my co-pilot just lay down on my matress. asked me watch out. before i could even ask what for or the more pressing question of, “whats goin on with you? is everythign alright?” i sat down on the edge of it cuz i was so fuckign exasperated that i didnt care anymore about cleaning it and was ready to just crash right then and there. as i sat there, i placed my hands on the edges to support me when i felt all this......sludge and oil on my fucking bed. trying not to blow up about it i took a deep breath, turned around and surveyed the situation. she was just lying in the thick of it. it was like olive oil but a bit more viscous and “heavier”... man it was so wierd. i was doing my best to not blow up about this i think ideserved a medal. i could STILL feel the occasional gaze of someone fucing staring at me. intent unknown. this overwhelming feeling of disgust was clawing up at me beacause i had NO fucking clue what this shit wason my damn bed an if it could even be CLEANED. it was it was stemming from her or she took the biggest pile of it for a fucking PILLOW  or smth and jumped right onto it. either way.im so mad. god im even getting mad just thinking about it lol. but maybe thats cuz of the stupid fuckign mess i had to clean up that someone else made and LEFT last night.
ANWYAYS 
i scooped most of the goop into... something to carry it off idr what. and the bed was all still kinda oily. i was mad and tired as hell and ijust sat back down on the edge and lay down from there. my fuckiugn copilot was still there sleeping or just resting or whatever idk. whenever i got to cleaning a a part of the bed that she was covering, id gotten a giant spatuler just to flip her up in the air like a flapjack, scoop out whatevers left on the bed and then laugh at the SPLAP sound she made when she landed back on the bed. it was like raw meat or fish hitting raw meat or fish kinda sound. which i have always thought to be pretty funny. still had no idea what all this mysterious substance was doing on my bed but iw as TIRED as FUCK. barely conscious enough to give a fuck anymore i yelled out in exasperation and got ready to just pass the fuck out. i thougth at the very least when i wake up ill hose myself down alongside with the matress. provided that whatever this fucking substance is doesnt like fucking poision us or some shit lol. agiain too fuckig tired to care........
before i could fucking fall asleep tho i was still thinkin about mitigating this problem as much as possible, so i called out to my friend on the opposite side and asked her if she knew about any reliable draining techniques for smth like thisand she handed me a few rods, 6or less cm in diameter and of varying lengths. she mumbled something an di THINK i understood enough. i lifted the matress on one end and used the rods to hold it up from the boxspring directly underneath it so it was slanted and whatever was left could just.. fall off onto the floor lol. and so this somehow worked and was held together well enough for me to lie back down on it and HOPEFULLY, FINALLY,-----
someone else had gotten on the damn bed immediately after i did. they were staring directly at me. i was so fucking mad. something about their demeanor at least told me they werent immediately hostile so i just turned away from both my co-pilot and this new person on my bed and closed my eyes. i wanted to know so fuckign bad what all these ppl’s deal was. it was driving me nuts why so many of them were staring at me an fucking with me like this.  what the FUCK is goin on. i kept asking myself this until i just slapped the bed in frustration and upon hearing the noise it made, laughed out loud. the other 2 on the bed also started laughing. i guess this lil moment of mirth shared between us made me feel a lot better. and also a lot more AWAKE. i apologized to my co-pilot comrade and said we should talk about whats goin on later after we’ve all had some good rest. also told her to like call me if she ends up leaving for wahtever reason. she grunted in acknowledgement and thne i turned to the new person. they were kinda tall n lanky with grey spiky hair. and an almost  while skin tone. wearing a similar outfit to my co-pilot and i but it was various hues of grey instead of black. might as well take this opportuinity to describe our appearances too.
the copilot and i had the sameish black outfit when we were in space, but by the time we reached the facility gymnasium or remodeled warehouse where all this shit was taking place, she had changed into like this black halter crop top with a black leather jacket and pants. she had these like super big like gucci sunglasses, a somewhat lightskinned skintone, a bit darker than my own, and long straight black hair. like one of those like wigs or smth wit straight bangs n fringes. she had these super big platform boots too.  i was wearing the same leather jacket buti  twas modified with with like frills on the ends of the shoulders and on some of the jackets seams and ends. there were some chains n necklaces going to an d fro in someplaces too. i think had some kind of modified black coverall pants with like a harness and some straps and belts runing all up n down the legs of the pants. i believe i was wearing this like frilly blouse. with like long frills... fuck i might have to draw this LOL. and i had some black work boots i think.
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i GUESS it ws smth like this whtever lol.s orta... i dont have TIME to worry about proportions lol....
ANYWAYS
ok yeah now that i wrote all this down and like remember now, the grey haired one didnt have a jacket and their clothing was more angular... anyways agian..............uhhhhhh
i think some time after we were laughign with eachother i was called by one of the like ppl in charge of maintenence or smth and asked me to go handle a problem that as brewing. i think i was literally asked to air out the gymnasium/warehouse. like to just open the doors and get a change of airflow goign on. maybe it was more compilicated than that but that was one of the first things i set out to do in response. the grey haired one at some point followed me and had something they wanted to talk to me about so ilet them come with ig. i think i was also asked to check up on something after i finishe with this first problem as well. something in some other part of the facility ig.
so off i went to begin this journey to help maintenece with their quest,walking across the gymnasium hall, making mybest efforts to not bump into anyone or any stationary desks or matresses or crates or wahtever, but by the time i got into the clearing area near the entrance i felt something nick one side of my waist. like a tooth scratched it. and then immediately after some ppl bumped into me. i was carrying the grey haired one on my back at this point and weraing a backpack over them to secure them i guess? i dont know why. they were holding on pretty tightly and they didnt get hit so they were fine. but the people who bumped into us started arguign with eachother almsot instantly. the way they were yelling at eachother n stuff made me think that like.. there was something afoot. like this was an engineered conflict from a 3rd party or these ppl just had some long standing conflicts taht were waiting to erupt. or perhaps both. when i got bumped and scratched i had just kept walking while putting my hand on the side of my waist that got scratched and reached the doorway that led into the gymnasium hall, but i stopped right in the middle of it when i hear them start yelling. OH RIGHt yeah the person on my back asked me to talk with them about somethign important concerning personal matters as well as something concering the stuff we brought back from space. they were planning to treat me to lunch to talk about it. i said to them, in the doorway, “sorry bout this, but i think our lunch is gonna have to wait.” they looked at me with a worried expression, and said something along the lines of, “i do understand but this is kinda important”, and i said back “im sure it is. we WILL talk about whatever it is, but this looks like something that could blow up in all of our faces. the shit they’re arguing about, it hits too close to home for me to hear all that and just LEAVE”. they nodded and said somethign about how theyre gonna wanna talk about too later, and i said, “why dont you help me out an be my typographer, make a list and keep track of this and all the things were gonna need to tgalk about” and they just laughed and got somethign out of their pockets i assume to do just that.
standing in the doorway still, i yelled out can someone tell me wahts going on? i was comepletely igonored and never really paid any attention to what the ppl who bumped into us looked like. so i figured id ask around on this syide of the gym. so with this person STILL clinging on my back i walked back into the hall and towards the wall on the opposite end from where my mattress was on the other end o f the gym, where i saw some ppl sitting at this super long desk up against the wall with some computers laid out alongside eachother. their users facing the computers and the wall. i walked up to them, folded my arms and said smth along the lines of “so, like sorry to bug you all about this, but what was up with alla that fighting just now? i feel kinda responsible since it was me they bumped into and i was wondering if you 3 (there were 3 of them each at their own computer sitting next to eachother) could tell me whats goin on” they looked at me, then at eachother and one o them said smth like “they sound like someone whos fronting too hard”. and then the 3 of them started quielty bickering about how true or false that might be. i stood there and very quietly said to the person on my back, “i HOPE i can come across as genuine enough thru all this since i am genuinely interested in making sure nobody dies from something preventable” and they said somethign to me that made me like. choke up. i remember thatf eeling but i dont fuckign remember what it was. it made me mad cuz iwas like ashamed of myself but the fact that they said this to me also made me happy. and like. a bit proud. ig... not realyl but sorta.
 and eventually the 3 of them looked at me and said smth liek “you know what youre alright ig, we can probably rely on you to get done what we cant” one of them pulled something up on the computer and started talkign to me abu the history between those ppl involved. and we came to the conclusiogn that someone is trying to incite violence and conflict by captializingt on past conflicts between those involved for some reason. we agreed we’d all try n stop this and i left them to do what they were going to do and the grey haired one and i left to go continue investigating. i also just kinda wanted to go somewhere wher ei coudl go have a shower and investigate the scratch left on my waist. we decided we’d go have lunch anyays to prepare and also to ask the grey haired one a favour regarding my copilot friend. dream ended around there i think....
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A non-OP fan’s (slashy/romantic)take on Buggy and Shanks’ relationship
Disclaimer: I’m not a One Piece fan by any stretch so I don’t follow the manga or anime but I’ve seen clips of it here and there on the internet, and got intrigued by the one and only Buggy and his relationship with Shanks. I’ve been thinking a lot about them recently and reading a lot of fics/reddit theories so here’s my take. I’ll most definitely miss stuff so actual fans please jump in and correct me/add things!
Warning: My interpretation is that there is some romantic undertones to their relationship. If you don’t agree with this please don’t read! Thanks :D
1. Shanks and Buggy grew up together on the same ship. Some have suggested that they were only 1 when they were picked up by Roger’s crew, although the youngest we’ve seen them tgt was when they were 9 years old. Regardless, they probably didn’t have much of a chance to form long lasting friendships with other children outside the ship, so their peer group consisted only of each other, and that’s crazy. 
2. I feel like these circumstances would’ve led to a form of closeness that supersedes modern friendship. Some have described their bond as a brotherhood, and many have stated that they love each other.
3. However, I feel like brotherly love doesn’t fully explain their dynamic(in the anime version of their Marineford reunion). While it explains why Shanks took care of Buggy when on the Oro Jackson despite their squabbles, why he invited Buggy to go with him after Roger’s execution, and why he seemed quite happy to see Buggy at Marineford aged 39, it doesn’t quite explain why his first instinct there was to make a fool of Buggy, only to brush it off as a whim afterwards. And it most certainly doesn’t explain the most SUS thing about that interaction, which was Shanks’ facial expression and tone of voice. There’s just something very sus about that in particular because it doesn’t feel brotherly, but more like flirtatious teasing??? which Buggy is totally confused by btw.
4. I watched the Japanese version of their reunion. During most of it one of Shanks’ eyebrows was slightly raised in a sort of mischievous way, and just before he walks off he says ‘I know, so don’t be angry.’ in a tone that’s borderline flirtatious???? Does Shanks know that he can placate Buggy with flirtatious teasing?? In that case I wouldn’t call this brotherly love anymore. Does that mean he’s done that in the past and it’s worked???????
5. Perhaps these are artistic liberties that the animators and voice actors have taken, but I assume this is also approved by Oda? Maybe this is a trap for yaoi fangirls and I’ve fallen into it lmao I am not sure how this works - someone more well versed in the mechanics of this please chip in :D In any case, we’ll see where this takes us:
6. There’s 2 things to address here: the trickery, and the borderline playful flirting that happened towards the end. Firstly, the trickery: there’s a power dynamic here and Shanks is the one on top. He’s thinking about how to stop the war, Luffy, and probably other bigger things. When he sees Buggy he probably felt a lot of things then but because of the circumstance, he decides to use him as a way to get something done. 
7. It was a funny interaction, and I’m going to over-analyse it. When Buggy refused to help Shanks with the strawhat, it’s interesting that the latter decided to trick him with the false promise of a treasure map, rather than to just say sth along the lines of ‘why not help for old times’ sake’ etc. Perhaps he thinks that Buggy would be too prideful to be swayed by those types of arguments. But perhaps this is where Shanks miscalculated, and why Buggy was so offended lol just a while ago Buggy had helped Luffy because he had been touched by his innocence and resemblance to young Shanks, and here Shanks is basically saying that even after all these years he still thinks Buggy is below matters of the heart. 
8. Shanks probably also thinks he can trick Buggy into doing things for him without incurring any real consequence. It’s almost like the ‘I’m just going to say this first and then deal with his reaction later’ type mentality. Let’s face it, what can Buggy do? Fighting is out of the question: the disparity in their power levels seems too large for this to be a concern for Shanks, and Buggy is highly averse to fighting battles that he knows he can’t win. Cutting ties? Well, that’s been done: Buggy rejected Shanks’ offer to join his crew years ago, and they haven’t really met since, so the worst has already happened. Shanks has had years to get over that.
9. Perhaps over time Shanks has become more focused than his easy smiles let on. Ironically, Buggy was the one to criticise Shanks for being soft hearted when they were younger, but ultimately it is Buggy who tears up at the sight of Luffy’s innocence and decides to fight alongside him in Impel Down, and it is him that calls out Shanks’ name in the middle of the battlefield, seemingly without a care for their surroundings or consequences, just to be taken advantage of by the other.
10. Some may say I’m making Shanks sound a bit evil, and that perhaps all of this happened subconsciously. Maybe the sentiment behind tricking Buggy is half a funny way to greet his old comrade, and half a sign that he still remembers a lot about him and on top of that trusts him with his hat.
11. While I agree with the fact that Shanks basically does not have any true malice towards Buggy, I can’t ignore the power dynamic between them. The trickery was funny only to Shanks, not to Buggy, but I think this dynamic fits perfectly with Shanks’ role as the Emperor and Buggy’s as the Clown.  
12. Alas, Emperors maintain an indestructible reputation, and Clowns make themselves look bad for laughs. So mb Buggy is just fulfilling that role for Shanks in the story. After all, Shanks is portrayed as a flawless man: he is selfless, ambitious, righteous, protects the weak, stops wars and has never lost a battle in his life. On the other hand, Buggy is portrayed in the complete opposite manner: he is self-serving, duplicitous, scummy, money-loving and lazy. 
13. It’s kind of sad that Buggy was basically born into(afaik his nose is natural) this role though and is forced to make the most out of it.
14. Secondly, the playful flirtatiousness(I keep using this word because I feel like that’s the vibe he gave off at the end of one of the clips I saw lmao): Shanks is not really treating Buggy as an adult in his own right, but acts as if Buggy is a child(or capricious lover??) that has to be coaxed into doing the right thing. That’s also borderline disrespectful, but it could just be a matter of them having been apart for such a long time that Shanks automatically defaulted to their old, childish ways because he hadn’t really had the chance to get to know Buggy as an adult.
15. But then this begs the question of what exactly is the nature of their relationship? Brotherly love doesn’t fit with the flirting, so perhaps it’s a different kind of love? Some possible reasons for why Shanks would ever be flirtatious could be 1. there’s some romantic elements to their relationship in the past that he’s taking advantage of now e.g. maybe Buggy was attracted to him and he is taking advantage of it? or 2. it’s a new thing he’s trying because he thinks it’s funny and Buggy would be too confused to keep retorting so it’s a fun way to end the conversation and at the same time to plant a seed in the clown that might make him follow Shanks later? (Buggy did immediately think about doing that lololol) Is this Shanks’ way of getting Buggy to come back to him lmao without explicitly asking loooool 
16. Judging by Buggy’s reaction it seems like number 2 is more likely but this is all anime-only afaik
17. All in all, I feel like Buggy is a special person to Shanks and vice versa, and even though Buggy is just one element of a much bigger picture for Shanks (whereas for Buggy, Shanks seems to have a much bigger presence in his mind), the fact that they spent their childhood only having each other as peers enabled them to form a deep mutual trust and closeness that didn’t seem to have dampened after twenty odd years of separation.
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rebeccccccaaa · 4 years
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𝒽𝑒 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒𝓈 𝓂𝑒, 𝒽𝑒 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒𝓈 𝓂𝑒 𝓃𝑜𝓉
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𝐵𝓊𝒸𝓀𝓎 𝐵𝒶𝓇𝓃𝑒𝓈 𝓍 𝑅𝑒𝒶𝒹𝑒𝓇
𝓇𝑒𝓆𝓊𝑒𝓈𝓉𝑒𝒹: imagine-all-the-fandoms said:
Hey you 💕 I’m so in love with your imagines, you’re a great writer! I hope it’s okay to send smth in as well ☺️ a Bucky one for where you’re crushing each other and head to a mission together in the snowy mountains where you get trapped by a storm in a cute cabin. First he’s all shy around you but in the end it’s all cute as he makes a little fire and shares his clothes to keep you warm which also leads to cuddling and finally sharing a kiss and even some loving smut when you finally admit your feelings ?
𝒲𝒶𝓇𝓃𝒾𝓃𝑔𝓈: Smut, 18+, Fluff, friends to lovers, shy Bucky, fluff, did I mention fluff? Plant stuff? you’re kinda like that bitch from sky high lol
𝒜𝓊𝓉𝒽𝑜𝓇’𝓈 𝒩𝑜𝓉𝑒: this is too cute and I had so much writing this, i feel it radiates like huge cottage core energy but in the snow XD anyways hope you like it bug and thanks for the request!!
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You were walking from the greenhouse/garden room holding a small plant when you bumped into a much larger figure, accidentally dropping said plant.
“Oh! I’m so sorry!” the voice said.
“It’s ok. I’m sorr-” you stopped.
The person was Bucky and under his big black boot was your little baby plant that you were taking to your room to nurse. You stared at him with a shocked and upset look on your face and Bucky stepped back to see the poor plant squished on the floor. 
Wanda was a bystander and rushed over to help clean up. She used her powers and mended the plant pot back together but the poor bud was still wilted. 
“Are you guys ok?” Wanda asked, handing you the pot with the wilted plant. 
“You squished my plant,” you said monotonously.
“I’m sorry,” Bucky said, panicked.
You playfully shook your head in disappointment trying your hardest to burst into giggles. It was ok because it’s what you do. You did… plant stuff. You weren’t exactly sure what your abilities were but you did know that you worked with plants very well.
You looked down at the bud and softly blew. Sage green magic circled the plant and life went back into the little sprout. Bucky’s panicked expression softened as he watched you use your magic. The way you smiled when the plant came back to life. That proud smile you had on made him smile too.
“There. All better,” you looked back Bucky. 
“All better,” he repeated with a smile.
“Hey, Y/n. Bucky,” Steve called you from down the hall.
“What’s up?”
“Fury needs you two in the conference room, says he’s got a mission for you two,” Steve walked away after he informed you both.
“Lead the way darling,” Bucky gestured his hand forward.
“Ah, you’re here. Why do you have a plant in your hand?”
“Bucky squished my flower under his boot,” you said.
“It was an accident,” Bucky mumbled.
“Moving on. I have a mission for you both in the alps. Some thugs are trading alien plant life so I need you,” he pointed to you, “to collect some samples for Tony and Bruce and Bucky will be there to protect you. If any plants die or get frozen you know what to do.”
You were plenty capable to handle yourself but you’ve never had to do so in the snow. You generally stuck to warmer and sunnier places when it came to missions. Bucky was pretty used to the snow so he knows to survive better in case you get stuck; but that won’t happen obviously.
“Wheels up in 30.”
You got to hide out and you were sort of struggling considering you had maybe seven layers of clothes on. You felt like a big puffy marshmallow waddling your way to the crime scene. The mission was somewhat successful, Bucky had really done all the work fighting and you just ran around tying up bad guys with vines and holding little seedlings in your pockets.
All was going until it didn’t. The wind picked up quickly and snow started thrashing around you and the others. You were fighting on the side of a hill, well Bucky was. You were still running around trying not to get shot. There was rumbling and the ground shook under you. You looked at Bucky who had taken down someone and his face held fear and concern. 
“Run!” he yelled.
“Where!” you started running anyhow.
“Follow me, doll!” 
You tried your best to run through heavy snow and with many many layers of clothes on you but it was becoming a struggle. Especially running against the wind made it a challenge on its own. Bucky was far ahead of you but thankfully turned back to grab your hand effectively dragging you alongside him running from the tumbling snow chasing after you. 
“Think you get us above ground? Maybe a tree? Rock platforms?” Bucky shouted, still running with his arm up to prevent snow and ice from getting in his eyes.
“The snow’s too thick and the wind is too strong,” you shouted back.
“I’m sorry,” you shouted shakily.
Before Bucky could respond the snowfall did a hiccup before finally settling within feet of you and Bucky. You two were exhausted and if you had to run any further, you’d probably be consumed by snow because you barely had any energy left in you to keep running.  
The wind was still harsh and the snow fell rapidly making it almost impossible to see even 5 feet in front of you. 
“We should find shelter,” Bucky said close to your face. Your nose was nearly numb from the cold and the warmth from Bucky’s proximity made it almost feel like it was burning. 
“I’m just following you,” you said with tired eyes.
After what felt like hours of walking you were practically dragging your feet and legs across the thick snow. The blankets of snow  glistened beautiful and sparkled under the sun. despite the sun now being out the weather was still almost unbearably cold. Your body still shook from the chill.
“You know, I’ve never liked winter. It was always so plain and boring with all the snow. And it’s so fucking cold; I’d rather be laying in the sun in a meadow. But this,” you circled your arms and twirled, “This is beautiful.”
“You what’s even more beautiful?” Bucky held your hand.
“What?” you said shyly.
“That cabin up ahead,” he smirked, and you smacked his chest.
“Well then, come on. I’m still freezing my butt off, and surely the seedlings in my pocket are frozen too,” you started treading the snow, grunting every step.
You got inside after a few tugs because the lock was practically frozen shut. The cabin was seemingly abandoned, else the hosts would certainly be surprised. Nonetheless, Bucky searched the house for anything to give you warmth. You stood in the living room area of the cabin awaiting instructions from Bucky since he seemed to know what he was doing. 
“Hey, doll. It looks like this place’s got two fireplaces. One here and in the master bedroom. Take your pick.”
“How long will be here?” you asked.
“I don’t know. I’ve hardly got any signal to send an alert.”
“That means we’ll probably spend the night. We should use the bedroom.”
“You can use the bedroom. I set a fire in the fireplace there, and then I’ll set one up out here for me when you’re taken care of,” he said.
“I thought we were sharing the room,” you mumbled, feeling embarrassed. See you had this little, itty, bitty, tiny crush on the fellow. But how could you not? He was perfect! You certainly weren’t going to waste the opportunity to share a bed with the guy if you ‘had to’. 
“Let’s get you taken care of,” he smiled softly.
You walked to the back room where the master bedroom was and it was beautiful. The bed was disassembled, the mattress was leaning to the side on the wall and the bed frame was taken apart. Bucky moved the bedframe to the side and flopped the mattress down to the floor. 
“Let me check for any blankets in this place,” Bucky ran off. 
You looked around and walked into the connected bathroom. To your absolute surprise there were small plants, unfortunately dead, and pots filled with dried out and chalky dirt. You could work with that. 
You picked them up and took them to the bed. You sat on the mattress and placed the pots in front of you on the floor at your feet. You pulled out the frozen seedlings and plants and placed each one in their own pot. 
That same sage green magic circled your hands and traveled to the pots where the dirt grew damp and the seedlings grew into buds. You smiled to yourself before looking up, eyes meeting Bucky’s who watched you with a grin on his face.
“It’s amazing what you do,” he said holding a bunch of blankets.
“It’s nothing.”
“No-” he was interrupted from the branches of the trees right outside the room baniging against the window hard. 
“Oh no. storm’s picking up again,” Bucky mumbled.
“Are we gonna be ok?” you asked.
“”We’ll be fine. Now are you hurt?”
“Just cold,” you whispered.
“Ok if you feel uncomfortable let me know and I’ll leave you ok?” you nodded.
“I need you to take your layers off until you reach your thermal.”
You zipped down your snow jacket that was incredibly wet from all the snow from outside. Next was a layer of your snow pants after you took your snow boots off, which were also wet; both the pants and boots.
Bucky helped you with the rest of your layers under you simply wore a thermal and your undergarments underneath. Your body was shaking still and the fire still wasn’t on yet. 
“Here are all the blankets I could find. Warm yourself up while I turn on the fireplace,” Bucky walked outside to gather some stumps of wood that were conveniently stacked next to the front door. He came back with a rock and banged it against his metal hand to create sparks which thankfully successfully lit the fire. 
“Are you feeling ok?” he asked shyly.
“Sort of, but the fire’s going so I think I’ll feel better very soon,” you responded.
Bucky was about to leave you and make his own fire in the living room when you stopped him.
“Buck, you don’t have to leave,” you said.
“Thought I’d give you some privacy,” he responded.
“I don’t need privacy, besides the fire’s already made. Just stay here,” you scooted on the bed for him to sit.
“Are you sure?” he asked.
“Come sit,” you smiled and patted the spot next to you.
He sat with you very closely and you feel his body heat radiating off his body like a heater. He asked if it was ok if he got rid of wet clothes too and you let him. When he took his last layer off he accidentally lifted his thermal shirt with it exposing his lower stomach. The muscle of his abdominals surprised you and you couldn’t help but oogle.
Bucky’s cheeks grew red and not from the cold. You two sat in silence. Your body was still trembling slightly and bucky wanted to help you. He just didn’t know if you;d be comfortable with the particular survival tactic. 
“I don’t want to upset you or make you uncomfortable but body heat and skin to skin contact is the most effective way to warm the body.
“Bucky, are you making a move on me?” you giggled.
“Uh no- sorry I, uh I-”
“I’m just teasing,” you smiled.
“I want to help you,” he whispered.
“Ok.”
Bucky moved away slightly and reached for the bottom of your shirt hesitantly looking to you for permission of which you granted. Your arms came up and the thermal slowly peeled off of your cold body. You were simply left in a bra and your arms covered yourself in coldness and also slight insecurity. 
Bucky also took his thermal off and tossed it to the side. Your eyes trained on his torso littered with little scars and bruises that made you want to reach out and hold him. He leaned back on the mattress and lifted his hips to remove his thermal pants and then looked back to you to make sure you were still ok.
You stood up and quickly discarded your pants as well as seeing Bucky turn his away from seeing you undress; which made your heart warm at his manners. When you were done you sat back down much closer to Bucky this time.
His arms wrapped around you and both your legs hitched over his thighs as you curled into him. His body was so hot, figuratively and literally. Your body instantly warmed up against his hardened muscles. You stayed this way while the fire burned and Bucky told you stories about him and Steve back in the 40s before everything happened. 
There was a moment of silence that settled between you and you looked into Bucky’s eyes. His hand came up and softly brushed the air from your face. You leaned into hand and smiled faintly to him and he smiled back. 
Bukcy leaned his forehead down to press against your and you could feel the tip of his equally cold nose on yours. You looked at each other waiting for the other to say something, anything.
“Are you going to kiss me?” you whispered.
“Do you want me to kiss you?” he whispered back.
“Please.”
Bucky lips attached to yours ever so gently. Your body practically melted against him, chills raising on your skin but not from the cold. His hands caressed the skin of your stomach and ribs and you moved straddled his thighs.
You felt growing wet from the way he held you tenderly against him. You started grinding yourself against his crotch feeling his dick getting hard pressing up against your core. Small moans and breathy sighs emitted from you and Bucky and his hands roamed to your ass. 
Bucky’s lips went to neck and you threw your head back for him and threaded your fingers through his hair. Bucky nipped and bit down on the skin before soothing it over with his tongue and dragged it down to your collarbone. 
You reached around and unclipped your bra and Bucky tossed over to the pile of clothes you had discarded beforehand. Bucky looked down at your chest for a second but averted his eyes to prevent you from being uncomfortable. 
His hands however kneaded the flesh of your breasts; insanely warm against your skin. 
“You’re so pretty, darling,” Bucky whispered in your ear making you shudder.
He flipped you over; the blanket fell to the side making your nipples harden from the chilly air. He stood up to remove his boxers and ran his hands up your legs sensually playing with the hem of your panties you still had on. 
He looked at you with gentle eyes before you nodded eagerly for him to take them off. After he did he crawled up body before settling between your hips. His cock was settled against your pussy and it practically throbbed, aching for more. 
He pumped his cock with his hand a few times leaning down to capture your lips with his. When he slid inside, you moaned loudly taking a hold of his shoulders with your hands. Bucky was huge! Nothing like any of your past lovers, not that you really many. 
“Hold on, hold on. I just need a second,” you told Bucky. 
He leaned down and pressed kisses all over your face; your hands cupping his face and jaw giggling. You looked into eyes once again and nodded letting him know that it was alright to move again. 
Bucky was in absolute heaven right now.
Your walls felt so soft and velvety as he easily thrusted in and out of you. A thin layer of sweat formed on his forehead. His hand reached down your arm and he intertwined his fingers with yours resting by your head. 
Bucky had been dreaming of this moment longer than he’d like to admit. He never considered himself to be a shy person; and definitely not jealous either. But when he met you, he always stuttered and stumbled over his feet and words barely getting a working sentence out of his mouth. 
Whenever Steve or Sam spoke to you, and generally flirted a lot of the time, he envied them for being so relaxed around you. He’d wanted to ask you on a proper date and take you home to worship you like you deserve; wake up next to you and make love all over again. But he couldn’t say hi without turning bright red.
But here you were, a dream come true, squirming, whining and moaning beautifully under him. 
“You are so gorgeous, baby. God, I can’t believe you're here,” Bucky kissed you. 
“Oh, Bucky you feel so good,” you moaned.
“Fuck, baby you’re taking me so well,” he praised.
You both moaned feeling your orgasm approaching rapidly. Your legs wrapped around Bucky’s torso driving him deeper in making you practically scream in pleasure. Bucky’s hips snapped in and out of you wildly desperate for that release he knows is going to be the best he’s ever had. 
When the coil in the pit of your stomach burst your back arched into Bucky and his face buried into your neck as he practically growled in pleasure. 
“Fuck that was amazing,” he kissed your neck and chuckled.
“Why are you always so shy around me? We probably could’ve done this way sooner,” you patted his back. 
“I, uh-”
“There you go stuttering again,” you giggled.
“I’m sorry. Y/n, I really like you and I have since I’ve met you. I don’t know why I feel so brain dead whenever I’m around you. I used to have no problem asking a pretty dame on a date, but when I met you, I couldn’t even say hi let alone ‘Hey wanna go on a date because I think you’re the most beautiful angel I’ve ever met in my goddamn life?’ It felt impossible,” Bucky sat up and sat you on his legs still wrapped in the blanket. 
“Bucky, I- oh,” you gasped.
“What?” you pointed to the wooden floor of the cabin. There were small buds and patches of grass coming through the cracks of the floorboards. There were also vines and branches covering the walls coming from the floor as well.
“Oh! Did I do that?” you looked back at him and he nodded.
“Oopsies,” you giggled.
“What if we had sex in the garden?” Bucky asked.
“Oh my gosh, Bucky!” you laughed.
“What?” a smile grew on his face watching you laugh in pure delight.
“You’re so silly,” you shook your head before yawning.
“Come on, doll. Let’s go sleep and we’ll see what’s gonna happen after the storm passes,” Bucky kissed you goodnight and you fell asleep comfortably in his arms.
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@mathletemadison 
ᴛᴀɢʟɪsᴛ:
ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴɴᴀ ʙᴇ ᴀᴅᴅᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴍʏ ᴘᴇʀᴍᴀɴᴇɴᴛ ᴛᴀɢʟɪsᴛ ᴍᴇssᴀɢᴇ ᴍᴇ! ;)
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papa-rhys · 3 years
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Thoughts on Jack and His Borderline Personality Disorder and How It Shows Through His Behaviour - Because I Cannot Stop Analysing Things That Ultimately Aren’t Important
Symptoms/behaviours under the cut because holy hell this guy has a lot of them. Like, honey, are you okay?
Okay, so I’m pretty sure I can trace Jack’s BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) back to his grandmother. His mum abandoned him, which shows a reckless/irresponsible behaviour and her mum had fits of rage that didn’t correlate at all with the trigger (ie; drowning Jack’s cat because he didn’t make his bed). So I think he has a family history of it, with both his mother and grandmother having BPD and passing it down to him.
Either way, Jack definitely has it. In fact, he’s a textbook case of it.
Impulsivity
Spending sprees: he bought a pony made of diamonds because he was bored and throws money at all kinds of ventures to keep him occupied and because he wants to. I really don’t know how else to describe this one lol. He bought a pony. Made of diamonds. Because he could.
Gambling: won some of the things on his trophy shelf through poker and owns an entire casino. Hunting the Vaults themselves were a huge gamble too, especially the first two, since he wasn’t truly sure that they existed. He was prepared to sacrifice a lot in order to come out on top in both his career and his social standing. All in all, he’s reckless.
Binge eating: he doesn’t even like pretzels, but still eats them because he’s either bored or stressed. Talks about food quite a bit in conversation, too, especially his cravings.
Substance abuse: admits to being high on uppers for the duration of the pre sequel (and his time on Elpis as a whole) and tells further anecdotes about drugs and getting high in tftbl.
Promiscuity/unsafe sex: nothing about having sex with Nisha is safe lol. But in all seriousness, there’s no way to prove this one. He does strike me as the reckless sex sort though. No proof, just 7 years of knowing him as a character.
Emotional instability
Inappropriate trigger response: he strangles a man to death for simply mentioning his wife, stabs Lilith for talking about Angel, and tries to kill Rhys for not being sure about his grand plan (more on this later). His response to triggers is disproportionate, often resulting in extreme anger over small things that don’t warrant that intense of a reaction. He gets big angry about almost everything; there’s no middle ground. His reaction is never really “you’re annoying me a lot” or “don’t talk about that, I don’t like it.” His reaction to almost everything is “oh my god I will murder your first born child how dare you-”
Quickly changing mood: aside from being prone to fits of rage at the flick of a switch, Jack also flicks back to “normal” pretty quickly, too. He flips between telling you to kill yourself after surviving the train and then talks casually about his day. He’ll be filled with rage after Angel’s death and then suddenly he’s laughing about you jumping into lava and having fun tricking you into visiting his grandmother. He can be intensely angry or sorrowful one moment and then nonchalant and sociable the next. His moods don’t last very long.
Idolisation/devaluation
Jack does this with numerous people across the games, but the two shining examples are Moxxi and Rhys; Rhys being the most notable. He idolises Moxxi, complimenting her on how attractive she is and how smart she is and including her in his circle of close friends/teammates. Then the inevitable happens and she lets him down and he instantly changes his opinion on her as if he’d never thought she was good to begin with. The same happens with Rhys. Throughout tftbl, Jack is best friends with Rhys and seems to form a one-sided connection with him where he idolises him and thinks they’re going to be best friends for ever and that they’re the perfect team. You cannot make him mad at you in tftbl (trust me, I’ve tried). He’s encouraging to Rhys the whole way through, like they’re brothers. Then the second Rhys displays doubts about something Jack is passionate about, Jack reacts violently and completely devalues Rhys, claiming him to be his mortal enemy and trying to kill him. People with BPD do this often. They have strong convictions and have a tendency to feel betrayed by people who go against those convictions. Jack does this regularly and it leads to the breakup of a lot of his relationships.
Paranoia
He vented a room full of scientists into space, just in case. I mean, that pretty much sums it up, really. Jack is under a lot of stress at this point in the game and stress-induced paranoia is a particularly difficult symptom of BPD. With him already feeling the pressure, the mention of a possible mole is a huge trigger for Jack. Especially since he’s reeling from the recent betrayal from a friend. His brain is already working over time, planting uneasy feelings of distrust and being unsafe. So when he’s presented with the idea from an outside source, he runs with it. Betrayal goes on to become a big button to push in Jack’s life to the extent that he actively betrays people before they get a chance to betray him (ie; killing Wilhelm). Paranoia feeds into a lot of Jack’s bad decisions, particularly in the pre sequel era.
Delusion
Jack wasn’t lying when he told us that he’s the hero. He absolutely was not the hero at all, but he wasn’t lying about it. Because lying about something implies that you know it’s not true, and Jack genuinely believes he’s a good person. The best person, in fact. It’s not a lie because in his mind, it’s the god given truth. He’s massively delusional, even before the events of the pre sequel. He’ll spout all the cheesy 80s movie lines about saving the moon and being the hero and he thinks he’s the protagonist of his own big adventure. We know that’s not what’s happening, but Jack doesn’t see it that way. Another delusion is the idea he has about how much everyone loves him. He thinks Moxxi is obsessed with him and he thinks Angel is being forced to work against him. He cannot conceive of a world in which people don’t like him or agree with him. Because why wouldn’t they agree with him? He’s the hero. Everybody loves the hero...
Intense but unstable relationships
Moxxi, Angel, Lilith, the Vault Hunter; I could go on. Jack’s relationships with people are volatile and rocky, even when they’re seemingly on the same side like with Moxxi or even Nisha (who he forms a tight bond with very quickly). People with BPD feel all emotions intensely, which causes a roller coaster. Jack really likes Moxxi, but then he doesn’t want to talk to her, but then he wants her on the team, but then he gets mad at her for calling him a pet name and beign friendly, and then he’s telling her she’s sexy, and then he’s cursing her, and then he’s hanging pictures of her in his casino. It’s the same with Angel - he subjects her to physical torture, then he loves her, then he’s mad at her for helping the Vault Hunter, then he’s doting on her, then he’s manipulating her, then he’s grieving for her. Everything is a whirlwind.
Distorted self-image
Oh boy. Jack has this physically and mentally. Mentally in the sense that he thinks he’s a good person when he actions are abhorrent and also because he’s massively insecure. BPD often comes with a lack of identity, which causes insecurity to begin with. Throw that in a pot alongside some childhood abuse, betrayal, work place bullying, and grief, and you got yourself a big pot of insecurity soup. Put plainly, Jack doesn’t really know who he is at his baseline. His personality and interests and ideas and needs all change on an hourly basis. He morphs to suit his circumstances. He can be open, honest and down to earth when he’s trying to trick Rhys. He can be full of worry and desperation when he needs you to head to grandma’s house. He can be cunning and clever when he’s tricking you into killing Wilhelm. He can be fatherly, he can be nasty, he can be torturous, he can be laid back, he can be clever, he can be ignorant, he can be sheepish, he can be cocky. He’s everyone and no one all at once and this probably leaves him feeling very hollow and empty; which is another symptom of BPD. In the physical sense, Jack issues with self image are pretty clear. He wears a face over his face to hide his face. Yup. And he does this because he thinks he’s disgracefully ugly. This scar he’s so vehemently protective of is something that defines his whole persona going forward. He literally claims himself as Handsome Jack, forcing people to adhere to the idea that he’s so attractive that it should be his title. Even though he doesn’t feel that way and does everything he can to hide the real him. He thinks he’s hideous and he struggles between loving himself and hating himself because of it.
Fear of abandonment
Aaaand here we are at the crux of the problem. BPD boils down to the intense fear of abandonment and this is probably what guides Jack for most of his life. His father died, his mother literally abandoned him, his grandmother neglected him, his first wife died, second wife left, girlfriend and friends betrayed him, and daughter killed herself to get away from him. Abandonment is practically coded into Jack’s DNA at this point and every time it happens, it confirms his fears more. He clings to Moxxi after she betrays him - taking her ideas to try and rile her up and even going as far as to recreate her entire bar in his casino because he wants to keep her presence around. He fights tooth and claw against Angel’s rebellion, begging both her and you to stop what you’re doing and leave. The only time he begs you is when he’s facing perceived abandonment, that’s how strong the fear is. His final words to Angel are “I’ll still forgive you.” Jack isn’t a forgiving man by any stretch, but he’ll say anything he has to in order to prevent her from leaving him. He’ll stalk people, he’ll manipulate them, he’ll lie to them or keep them physically locked up - all to prevent them from abandoning him. The worst possible thing that could happen to Jack is that, and we see the spiral he slips into after Angel. After Moxxi. After the Meriff. After his wife. He can’t bare the thought of someone leaving him and he’ll do anything and everything to prevent his fears becoming a reality.
So yeah! There it is, I finally got around to posting it lol. There’s probably a lot more little details that I’ve forgotten, but I cannot think of them right now. I’ll probably update if I think of any more! The tl;dr is that almost all of Jack’s behaviour can be linked to massively untreated BPD. He needed meds and therapy, but he didn’t get them and he spiralled as a result.
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dragonsareourfuture · 3 years
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Light Yagami/GN! L’s Sibling!Reader — Protector
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⚠️Warnings: Unhealthy relationships, manipulation, reader experiences grief, major character death, open ending.
requested by @darkrose33 ! sorry this took so long, I mostly finished writing it and then changed ideas halfway through, so I rewrote it all lol. I could not think of a way that the dynamic and story line that was requested could work in the context of a healthy relationship, so this isn't exactly a happy or romantic oneshot. I wanted to make this as realistic to Light's motivations and character as I could. I apologize if this isn’t what you wanted but you can always request something else if you would like :)
For as long as you can remember, your big brother was the person you looked up to the most. He was the brains, the one who had no trouble with the academics but every ounce of trouble with the social aspect of life. He wasn’t one to care what people thought about him socially, which in turn allowed him to behave however he wanted. He was an expert at leaving a room silent and stunned with just his words because of his lack of filter, telling only the brutal, honest truth when necessary. You couldn’t help but admire L Lawliet more than anything else in the world.
And because you held such admiration for the boy, you appointed yourself to be the role of his protector. Some kid called him a weirdo behind his back? Not to worry, with a little persuasion you can get them to apologize. He’s feeling overworked and you overhear one of the adults talking about a pile of paperwork they are about to drop off to L’s room? Huh, it seems that paperwork somehow ended up in the fireplace, nothing but a pile of ashes left of it. How strange. However you could protect him, you took on that challenge, even if it was simply being in the same room as him for emotional support. If you knew he needed to consume at least one vegetable that week, you were there to deliver, even if you had to hide it in a piece of cake. Whatever you could do, you did. Some told you that was what made you two so interesting – he was the brains, and you were the brawn, but you both needed each other to balance out. Like Yin and Yang.
So imagine your despair when, quite suddenly, L didn’t need you anymore. He was solving more cases, gaining in fame as the world’s greatest detective in his mere teenage years. He would, undoubtedly, need more protection than little ol’ you could provide once professional criminals found the desire to seek him out and kill him. And of course you wanted him to be safe, wanted him to thrive in the occupation that he excelled at, but…you missed your big brother with all of your heart. Not a day went by that you didn’t wish you could bring L his lunch or defend his honor out in the kickball field when some kid wouldn’t shut their big fat mouth. You missed those days.
You heard about the Kira case and how it was kicking everyone on the task force’s ass, including L’s. It only made you wish you could be there more. You kept up on the news, though. It was just about the only thing you could do. You tried to distract yourself with your own studies, but it was difficult to even try when you knew you could never in your wildest imagination come close to rising above your big brother.
You kept reminding yourself that you were grown now. You were fully capable of making a life for yourself that didn’t involve L – that didn’t include worrying about him every few moments. So you worked however pointless it may have seemed. You cooked, you did chores, even started taking up odd jobs to complete during the little free time you would have spent sleeping if you weren’t prone to dreams about the danger L could be in. Every moment in life was spent trying not to worry…only for you to realize that you had every right to worry all along.
The news itself was not particularly surprising. L and every single one of his runners up had to write out their will in advance – about a decade early. Death was to be expected in that line of work.
You had since moved out of Wammy’s house officially, but always stuck around to do the gardening, occasionally the cooking as well. Also the cleaning…you were basically the Wammy house maid, but you were grateful for the distractions.
When the news came, you were in the middle of planting a batch of bulbs you had bought at the store the previous day – white lilies. You had nearly passed them by in favor of a more colorful flower, but when your eyes caught the lack of pigment of the fully grown lily on the packaging, you couldn’t help but be reminded of your big brother’s pale as bone skin. You had chuckled at the memory, blinked away a few rising tears, and plucked the bulbs from the shelf. Now, with about half of the bulbs buried under the soil and half waiting to be planted, you listened to Roger’s words grow increasingly louder the closer he came to where you sat crouched in the dirt. You wished you hadn’t listened, though. For he only brought you sorrow.
It wasn’t that you didn’t believe Roger when he had come to tell you of your brother’s passing, it was simply that it was near impossible for you to imagine a world without the eccentric boy you’d grown up alongside. Sure, you’d been separated for some time now, but you’d grown used to knowing that even if he wasn’t with you, he was still somewhere fighting for the justice he believed in. To be told that he suddenly wasn’t in this world anymore…? You had to see it for yourself. So, despite Roger’s warnings, you ran inside and booked a flight to Japan as soon as you could. In your blind panic, you must have trampled the remaining bulbs you had yet to give life to.
The flight was stressful, the landing equally so. The drive to the task force building – torture. By the time you made it out of the car and through the doors of the task force building, you swore your throat was closing up. A glass of water was offered to you and, gratefully accepting the offer, you glugged the water down in a matter of seconds before someone else was offering you a seat.
You sat, pulling your legs up and curling them in. The chair was then pushed into place at a table and the man who offered it to you…placed a hand on your shoulder…?
You jolted, the empty cup in your hands almost toppling out of your grip.
“I’m sorry…! I should have asked first. My apologies…and my condolences.”
He appeared younger than everyone else around you. Young enough to be just about your age. His apologetic smile shone down on you like a beacon of light in the dark and dreary times you had seemingly been trapped in for so long. After that thought, you had stared in disbelief when he told you his name. Light. Fitting, you thought.
Light placed a hand onto the chair next to you, looking at you as if for permission. You nodded vaguely, hoping to convey your silent gratitude for him being so considerate. It wasn’t as if no one else had been this kind to you since hearing about the news, it was more so that you got the sense Light actually cared rather than simply spouting out the usual ‘I’m sorry’s you’re supposed to when someone experiences a loss. His words were not empty; they were full of life and intent. What that intent was, you didn’t know, but you wanted to keep feeling it over the usual hollow atmosphere you and your brother grew up in. So, before you knew it, you were spending hours at a time talking with Light Yagami, the very man who would be taking over the Kira case since your brother’s death.
It was indeed shocking to you how someone so young, even young in comparison to L, could lead an entire investigation. Granted, he had the rest of the task force by his side, but after only one day of observing their dynamic, you could feel the disconnection between them. Light was multiple steps ahead of them; there was no question about it. At times you got the sense he was keeping things from them. But, then again, you were almost certain L had done the same thing while he was leading them. It was difficult to blame someone so intelligent when they wanted to save time and not explain to everyone what their plan is, but lead them all like sheep. It would be faster that way, easier too.
With that final thought, the pedestal you were putting Light on became visible to you. But it couldn’t be a bad thing. It was normal for you to look up to your brother, yes? With Light, it was a different sensation altogether, but the same idea. You admired him, and you couldn’t see the harm in that when he was rubbing your back in comforting circles as you cried, talking to you and telling stories when you wanted to focus on something else. He was helping you, and because he wanted to, no less.
It was a strange sensation to wake up and have everyone you know suddenly become cautious around you, treating you like glass that would break if they said the wrong thing. After just a few minutes of this, you knew exactly what day it was. It somewhat startled you, your brother’s funeral being so soon. You wondered if the date had been pushed up, but no. You had simply been…distracted. In a good way, that is. When you first arrived in Japan, you thought that nothing but dread would accompany your visit. You had no clue how you would make it through the couple of days leading up to the funeral, how you would occupy your time. Sightseeing felt disrespectful. Besides, how could you appreciate fine architecture or lush greenery with such a weight in your heart, spreading throughout your body like a disease? What you hadn’t expected was to find someone who seemingly made everything more bearable. Someone who made the days pass faster.
This special someone helped you into your outfit – all black, casual yet put together. Light was gentle with you that day. Not skittish or cautious like the others were, but soft and loving. He would touch you, hands on your shoulders and a brush of his fingers through your hair every now and then, but it would be feather light and comforting all the same. He knew exactly how to make you feel noticed and cared for, but not in the least bit overwhelmed with affection – a perfect medium.
Driving to the graveyard was not as stressful as your initial drive from the airport. You originally suspected this was the case because you had time to accept the reality of it all; you were able to let the information ferment and sink in. But, as you got steadily closer to your destination and all the grief you had avoided for the last few days began to bubble to the surface of your mind, you realized this was not the case. What you had time to do was ignore the truth, become distracted as you always did. It had always been your way of dealing with your own problems. It was L’s problems you could face head on. But anything personal to you? No sir. You desperately wished you’d taken the time to develop a better coping mechanism as the car pulled into the small patch of asphalt among a sea of grass and graves.
You hadn’t even realized how fast you were breathing until Light clasped your hand, his free hand reaching to turn your head to face him directly. “Are you okay? Can you hear me?” You nodded. “Good. Now, I want you to take slower, deeper breaths, alright?” you nodded again and followed his instructions – in then out at a slow pace, inhaling as deeply as you could before blowing the air from your mouth. You squeezed Light’s hand and sent him a weary smile when you had gathered your wits.
The fresh air did you good as you stepped out of the car, shoes crunching in the loose grains of asphalt and soon gliding through blades of grass. You started to calm down, internally congratulating yourself for not freaking out with each step. This was the continued routine until the gravestone came into view. The task force was heading toward it, so no doubt it was L’S. It was marked by a fairly large, golden cross that reflected the setting sun like a mirror. You ducked your head, pretending that it was indeed the sun in your eyes that caused you to stop and cover your face. You waved for Light to go on ahead and assured him you would meet him there in a bit. You were absolutely sure no one bought your excuse, but they still respected your wishes and left you behind to gather around your brother’s grave while you turned your back to it.
You walked back to the car almost on autopilot. You could barely see, so you trained your eyes on the ground as tears freely flowed down your cheeks, not a sound leaving your lips until you were safely beside the vehicle you arrived in. You stomped your foot in the asphalt, kicked the loose pebbles around, feeling just like the child you used to be. Throwing a tantrum was not on your funeral to-do list, but there you were. You just didn’t know if you could bear it, seeing your brother for the last time as nothing but a slab of stone. You could sit by it, protect it all you wanted but it would never need you. Not like he used to. You could plant those lilies you had abandoned by it. That wasn’t actually a terrible idea.
You didn’t know how long you were standing there, pacing in the middle of the parking lot. Mustn’t have been too long, as the sun hadn’t even passed over the horizon, but it felt like an eternity.
Until…what was that? Something caught your attention, causing your head to snap up in search for the source. The others were nowhere in sight, all that stirred were a couple of birds from a nearby tree. That could have been another family visiting a grave, which would make sense given that the noise sounded similar to hysterical crying. Or…was that laughter?
You began to grow worried, deciding on a whim to check up on the others. You wouldn’t approach the grave unless you had to, you decided. Yeah, good plan, you managed to convince yourself as you took steps toward the grave. With every few feet, the noises grew louder, and you were soon able to recognize words. You sped up your pace until you made it over the hill that separated the parking lot from the field only to find…
What was Light doing on the ground? No, a better question would be: what was Light – the person who was working his ass off to catch Kira – doing kneeling on your brother’s grave, shouting that he would get rid of the police? That this is his perfect victory? That he wins?
You felt…what? What could sum up that feeling that filled your chest when that sight was exposed to you? You felt confused, you felt unsure. Then, with the realization of what was going on, you felt betrayal. Then, in a sudden wave intense enough to make you feel as though you would fall over, you felt furious. You felt a sudden need to protect your older brother just like you had done for years with playground bullies and critics, but this time with someone you thought you could trust. Someone you loved who had apparently taken advantage of your care for him – someone who had lied to your face about who they truly were.
Before you knew it you were sprinting across the field. You had no clue what you were going to do until you got to the grave and quite literally kicked him off the soil your own flesh and blood was buried under. The move was so swift you wondered if it had actually happened or if this was all some sick nightmare. God, you hoped it was. Although you almost didn’t want to pray to god now, as there was a self-proclaimed god sitting with the wind knocked out of him at your feet.
“You…you GODDAMN FUCKING TRAITOR—” you couldn’t tell if Light was actually looking at you with eyes glinting with fear or if the sunset lighting was playing tricks on you. “THAT’S MY FUCKING BROTHER—YOU CAN’T—I SHOULD NEVER HAVE—” It was impossible to finish a sentence or even a thought in your own brain. There were so many things you wanted to say and kill him for but right now everything was jumbled together.
The way Light was staring at you didn’t exactly help. Eyes that now looked red in the setting sun bore into your own pupils from the ground. He looked dead serious, almost angry that you had the guts to knock him to the ground in your fit of rage. But although your words were coming out in screaming stutters your movements seemed swift and sure, as the moment Light moved to stand up your foot flew to action once more and planted right onto his chest. His back met the ground for a second time. He wasn’t even trying to contain his fury, clawing at your ankle and baring his teeth like a dog trying his best to be intimidating, but still eager to know what you were planning to do next. After all, he could have easily shoved you off. But he was curious.
You spoke calmly now, mind set on what you wanted to ask. “You never cared about me, did you?” Light’s mouth opened to answer but you went on without letting him speak. “No, you cared about me, but only because my brother was L, and I could give you information now that he’s gone. Am I right?” again, his mouth opened, but when your heel unexpectedly dug into his chest he let out a pained and irritated groan instead of coherent words. It was like you were teasing him, not to get a laugh out of his pain but…for what? You barely even knew yourself. It wouldn’t do anything. It wouldn’t make you less humiliated for being tricked and it certainly wouldn’t bring your brother back. Either way, Light definitely didn’t like it.
Before you had the chance to react you were thrown onto your back. Light had pushed you back by your leg and rose to his feet, now above you in every sense of the word. He – Kira – had carried out his plan. Meanwhile, you had nothing left.
“You don’t have to go against me,” Light seethed, “All you have to do is let the new world take its shape, and everything will fall into place.”
“That’s a shitty sales pitch.”
“It’s an offer. You’ve done nothing wrong, committed no crimes. You’d do well in my world.” The look on your face made it apparent that you had no interest in his words. Light furrowed his brows, then the ghost of a smile twitched at the corners of his lips. “I know you –”
“You don’t know anything about me. And I clearly didn’t know you.” You pushed yourself up onto your elbows.
“—you wouldn’t want your brother’s death to be in vain.”
“I—” you paused. “What?”
“L was an obstacle I had to pass to get to a world where less people would have to suffer the same loss you have. I expect you don’t want to just throw away his death and turn me in. you can make something out of his sacrifice—“
“He wasn’t TRYING to be sacrificed; he was TRYING to put a vigilante maniac to death.”
“But if his death could mean a better world for others, you would just throw that away for your own revenge?”
You blinked, once, twice, then rapidly, shaking your head as if trying to prevent dust from getting into your eyes, or Light’s siren song from getting into your head. “Stop. That’s not…Just stop.”
“You know I’m right.” He stepped towards you and for a second you thought he was about to repay you for crushing his lungs moments ago. All that followed was his hand shooting out, stopping in front of your face. You looked up at him in disbelief. “I’ll love and care for you as I did before. I can be the one you care for in his place. All I ask is that you help me create a better world, or at least don’t try and stop me.”
You nearly scoff, but some of his words actually catch your attention. He’d love and care for you…but it would all be fake. Still, what kind of person would you be to reject others a grief-less world just to avenge your brother? But who ever said Light would follow through, not become corrupt along the way if he wasn’t already? There were so many possibilities and so many possible outcomes, all influenced by this one decision that you had to make right now.
You choked on your words.
Familiar voices were approaching.
Time was ticking.
“I…”
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twstheadcanons · 3 years
Note
Any hcs for pomefiore, like how its students interact socially. Or hcs on the etiquette lessons?
this is long
·         I stand by what I said about Savanaclaw – Night Raven College has a bunch of stupid high school boys in its student body.  Being in Pomefiore does not erase your dumb high school energy.  It is just redirected.  As the oldest dorm, Pomefiore has some antiquated decour, and its own pride in maintaining them, including its gratuitous amount of candles strewn about.  Are the candlelit flames real?  Yes.  Can students touch them and light them themselves? Absolutely not.  They’re enchanted to light up and extinguish on their own. Vil’s seen firsthand how hotheaded and confrontational Pomefiore students can be.  He finds enchanted candles reasonable.  
·         There’s a garden in the back of the dorm building.  As the dorm known for its prowess in poisons and potions, it’s important for Pomefiore students to be able to identify specific types of flora commonly used in formulas, alongside their potential benefits and dangers.
·         Gardening can be grueling, especially when dealing with tricky, difficult flora. Vil has extensive instructions under his belt when it comes to making sure all students do their part (there is no avoiding gardening duty).  As such, alongside gardening itself, he’s put a lot of time and effort researching and specialising methods to minimise/mitigate the amount of mess and physical involved – and that’s without cutting corners.  Every new year brings in new students with their own personal strengths, so he has to make sure no stone goes unturned.
·     ��   That said, absolutely no one shares gardening gloves.  Crowley is crying at the expenses of just damn gardening gloves but Vil is Not going to budge.
·         Of course, the apple trees are ones Pomefiore plants as well.  It’s their signature after all.  Rook hawk eyes both the trees’ growth and makes sure no one’s snagging them beforehand.  Ever since Epel enrolled, he’s lowkey more instructive of the process whenever Vil’s not around.  He’s also got his own shortcuts and tricks for general gardening.  Having a more hands-on approach since birth, it comes naturally to him.
·         Like, no offence, but the Pomefiore apples are not as good as the ones the Felmiers grow.
·         Epel is constantly on the verge of going apeshit when something he KNOWS he’s good at and knows his shit about is getting nitpicked, so for Vil’s safety I am making the executive decision that Vil’s noticed Epel sometimes taking charge in helping other students and just lets Epel do his own thing when it comes to helping out with Pomefiore’s plants and apples.
·         Honestly, having the two different approaches work in Pomefiore’s favour.  Some students need/want more structure and guidance, making Vil a better option.  Others benefit from Epel’s self-assured, informal approach since it makes it seem less daunting for beginners.
·         Rook likes to indulge himself when it comes to apples.  By that I mean he likes to ‘help’ students ‘slice’ their apples by doing the classic arrow-through-the-apple thing.  A lot of students think it’s actually pretty awesome.  
·         Right up until Rook asks for a volunteer to have the apple on their head.
·         The science club actually has its fair share of Pomefiore students apart from Rook.  Some are simply following the example of a generally respected vice-leader, whilst other took it for their own interests.
·         The same goes for film appreciation.   While small and mostly Pomefiore students under Vil’s lead, it’s a close circle of students working together.
·         The ballroom, like gardening, requires its own care and maintenance.  Keeping floors, windows, and mirrors clean.  This actually goes for the entire dorm, but the ballroom hosts a lot of Pomefiore’s recreational and group events (makes for a good place for film appreciation rehearsals).
·         Another reason it’s important to keep the dorm itself clean overall: absolutely no one wants perfume and cologne just lingering in furniture.  That is not the life anyone wants.  Ever.
·         This is something Rook’s especially quick to get on others’ cases about (in his own Rook Hunt way that is).  He’s a hunter, so he doesn’t want to risk even the most wonderful of scents blowing his cover.
·         Speaking of Rook, if you’re familiar with French in Pomefiore, but don’t use it often.  You Do Now for the sake of your fellow dormmates that want to know what the hell Rook is saying.
·         Students in Pomefiore tend to grow up into more hands-on careers.  Of course, there’s the ones in professions like show business, fashion, and cosmetology, but other common careers they gravitate to are generally science or fine arts related.
·         If you know what’s good for you, and you’re interested in fashion, start learning about the ethical issues and dangers of fast fashion ASAP.  As someone surrounded by aesthetics and designs, Vil knows his shit and idealistic views that overlook the shady business practises of even big-name groups get under his skin fast.  In general, as passionate as he is in his line of work, Vil’s still disillusioned to the glitz and glamour of it, which is why he takes such an aggressive stance on his own management.
·         Since first years share four students in one dorm room, Epel’s roommates will never escape the apple smell.  It’s gone from charming, to a bit sickening, to being plain desentisised to the scent. While all three are kind of over having an apple or apple juice every time Epel’s family sends them, they’ll happily accept them from time to time.  The apple juice especially is popular since it makes for a refreshing change from water.
·         Makeup brand debates.  They’re a thing.  Vil mostly thinks they’re dumb on a surface level since people just gravitate to what works for them and is within their budget but if you ask he’s got dirt on which brands have the worst practises that don’t need Anyone’s money.
·         Considering his ‘villain’ typecasting the guy has no fear using his platform to be outspoken on those types of issues which is why a lot of Pomefiore students end up actually respecting him outside his acting and modeling career.
·         For the record, it’s not like Epel’s the only student from a rural background in Pomefiore. There are plenty of others, it’s just that they didn’t literally get into a fight with a dorm leader during the opening ceremony.
·         The way he acts with Epel early on, however, does leave a rather unflattering impression on said rural students.  Epel doesn’t really keep his background a secret, so it’s easy to hear Vil scold Epel’s informal, direct way of speaking as him disliking the actual accents a country person may have.  So like. Vil’s gotta work on clearing that up with them, lol.
·         This is a “Vil’s done a good number of things wrong” zone regardless of his background and actual intent and also a “Pomefiore isn’t only about beauty but considering the way its students act and speak in general Uhhhhh” so as focused as Vil is on image and Pomefiore on seeming ‘proper’ I am Forcing him to reevaluate his approach to educating less experienced students on westernised and Eurocentric etiquette expectations.   You’re going to have students with staunchly different mannerisms and ideas of etiquette that do not affect their work ethic whatsoever sweetie.  
·         In a similar vein, older Pomefiore students that happen to be beastfolk (I’d like to imagine the Mirror of Darkness doesn’t magically toss Savanaclaw into some unholy ‘this is the beastfolk ghetto’ hell.  Do not burst my bubble I won’t listen) usually end up being tightknit with first years.  Honestly how else are first-years going to survive Rook Hunt being their vice-leader.
Vil also takes his own measures to minimise how up in their business Rook gets with Pomefiore’s own beastfolk.  
Being a detail-oriented dorm, Pomefiore has the most amount of students experienced in hands-on work and crafts.  If the individual students get along, Savanaclaw and Pomefiore students can get a lot done when they put their minds to it.
“Absolutely Beautiful” blasting from the ballroom at 5am so the less morning-inclined can wake up properly for the next three weeks.
·         Look Vil and Rook have particularly polarising personalities you cannot expect the entire dorm to worship them nor their way of doing things.
·         Master Chef, although a small elective, also has its fair share of Pomefiore students.  Something about a practical skills class appeals to them, and it actually makes for relaxing classwork.  
·         First dorm that sorts out people’s allergies.  If you think it’s excessive Pomefiore has forms prepared for new students to fill out regarding any extenuating circumstances and conditions think again. No health accidents happening in this dorm.
·         Mentions of students struggling tend to result in other students helping each other out. Study groups are pretty encouraged within the dorm if it works out for the people involved.  The lounge aside, the ballroom’s surprisingly popular for study groups when it’s not in-use for anything else.
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sachigram · 4 years
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Your jealous Shizuo prompt has me reeling, (mostly because of the posessive Shinra) <3 <3 I am now requesting Shinra purposely fanning the flames of Shizuo and Izaya's rivalry throughout high school because he doesn't want either of his friends to like each other more than they like him. Bonus points if Shizuo and Izaya do start dating after high school and Shinra is not a happy camper!
((Lol another one for the “Shinra is a creep” collection))
Shizuo sees less and less of Izaya at school.
Shinra blabs all the time about Izaya and his illegal activities. Apparently Izaya is building some kind of network with the Yakuza and other groups Shizuo despises. Sounds just like the conniving little bastard, and Shizuo only hopes Izaya gets what he deserves in the end.
Rarely, Shizuo will see Izaya in the halls at school. He still shows up for test days, aces them, and then dips out before anyone can miss him. Shizuo wonders how the hell Izaya gets away with it, but everyone seems to find Izaya charming, and Izaya has a reputation for being a genius as well as being a menace.
“He's won awards for poetry, you know?” Shinra says one afternoon, unprovoked, of course.
“That doesn't seem like the kind of thing Izaya would want us knowing,” Kadota replies, and Shinra just laughs.
“Well then he should be here to stop me!”
Shizuo tries to think of Izaya being the kind of guy to write poems. Does he paint, too? Does he spend hours in his room creating things just to destroy them later? That sounds more like Izaya.
“What's with that fond expression?” Shinra asks, turning so he can face Shizuo. He's walking backwards, and Shizuo scowls at him in return. “Do you miss Izaya-kun?”
“Do you want to die today, Shinra?”
“If you kill me, Celty will avenge me!”
“I don't think she'd mind all that much, actually,” Shizuo huffs. “I hope the flea stays gone. I hope he's dead.”
“Mm, you say that, but I think you're bored without him! You've been even quicker to anger than normal without him around,” Shinra says with a pout.
Shizuo considers this. It's true that he's more on edge when Izaya isn't here, but that's because he's waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting for Izaya to come back with some catastrophe up his sleeve. Not to mention without Izaya, Shizuo doesn't have much of an outlet for his anger. He still gets in fights, but no one can really stand up to him, and most people in the school are so afraid of him that they don't even brush against him in passing.
“Shut up,” Shizuo says.
Shinra scrutinizes Shizuo's face, and then he's grinning innocently.
“He's probably plotting something for you,” Shinra says. “He really hates you, you know?”
“Shinra, come on,” Kadota says, lifting a hand. “Izaya isn't even here. Why're you trying to rile Shizuo up?”
“I'm not! I'm only saying! You're right to be on edge, Shizuo-kun, that's all. Just keep your guard up!”
Later, when Shinra breaks off from them to head home, Kadota turns to Shizuo.
“Hey, don't listen to Shinra. I don't think what he said was even true.”
“Huh?” Shizuo asks. He was thinking about what Izaya could be planning, so it takes him a moment to comprehend what Kadota said.
“It's just that he...” Kadota rubs the back of his neck as if he feels awkward. “I don't think Izaya plots every second of his time around you, you know? I'm not saying he's not an asshole to you, and I'm not saying he doesn't like to mess with you, but I really think Shinra is exaggerating. He's like that.”
“Why would he?” Shizuo asks.
“Because he has a thing for Izaya and he's worried you do, too.”
Shizuo makes a face, and Kadota laughs loudly, his hands going up in surrender.
“I'm just saying, don't read into it, okay? Don't think about Izaya so much, man, it's exactly what he wants from you.”
Kadota leaves then, and Shizuo is left frowning on the sidewalk, wondering why the hell anyone would think he has a thing for the flea.
***
The next month drags on. Exams are around the corner, and graduation not long after that. They're all pretty busy, and Shizuo enjoys the peace of not being jumped around every corner of the city. Apparently even Izaya is too busy to scheme anything.
Shizuo is on his way home one day when something hits him in the back of his head. He growls and turns, catching the object before it can hit the ground. It's a candy bar?
“Hi there, Shizu-chan!” Izaya lilts. Shizuo growls at him.
“Why the fuck did you throw this at me?”
“Someone gave it to me and I don't care for that kind of chocolate. You like sweets, don't you?” Izaya asks.
“You poisoned it,” Shizuo says.
“It's in the wrapper, you idiot. Fine, don't eat it then. Don't say I never tried to be nice to you!” Izaya sighs dramatically and hunches over like he might fall in the floor. “To think, I spent my own money on that.”
“You just said someone gave it to you.”
“Did I?” Izaya grins. “Ah, well. Someone spent their money on it.”
“Where the hell have you been? Are you trying to flunk out or something?” Shizuo asks. Izaya looks good, which isn't unusual, but he also looks well-rested for a change.
“Been busy, you know? Besides, there's no risk of me flunking. What's wrong, Shizu-chan, have you missed me?” Izaya bats his eyelashes, and Shizuo throws the chocolate bar back at him.
“Fuck off. I've actually enjoyed you being gone.”
“How cruel! You really do take me for granted!”
Shizuo huffs and starts to tell Izaya to go to Hell, but suddenly Shinra is there, tackling Izaya from behind.
“Izaya-kun! You haven't even been answering your phone!” Shinra says, his arms around Izaya's waist. “Maybe I was worried about you!”
“As if you worry about anyone other than yourself and your girlfriend,” Izaya says.
Shinra looks from Izaya to Shizuo. “Are you guys fighting already?”
“Of course we are! Shizu-chan likes to fight with me, don't you, Shizu-chan?” Izaya asks.
“I hate everything about you,” Shizuo replies, his eyes still on Shinra's arms around Izaya.
“Isn't he charming?” Izaya asks Shinra, and then he's allowing himself to be dragged away. They pass by Shizuo, who lets them go, and Shizuo is in a bad mood for his entire walk home.
Later on, when he's changing from his uniform, he blinks in surprise as he feels something in his pocket. It's that damned candy bar. Izaya must have slipped it into his pants pocket when he passed by. Shizuo looks it over, unwraps it, and takes a bite.
It's actually his favorite kind.
***
The next day, he sees Izaya again.  
Izaya is easy to find, is set up in an empty classroom, a book in his hands. Shizuo stomps towards him, yanks the book away, and throws it out the window.
“Shizu-chan, I know the thought of learning infuriates you, but does the thought of others learning really piss you off so much, too?”
“Shut the hell up. What are you doing in here?”
“Well, I was reading...”
“Cut the shit.” Shizuo leans onto the desk, eyeing Izaya suspiciously. “What are you plotting, huh? It's been too quiet lately, and I don't trust it.”
Izaya blinks and tilts his head to the side.
Cute.
The thought makes Shizuo angry, and he winds up smacking the desk so it tips over.
“When I bother you, you get angry, and when I don't bother you, you get angry,” Izaya says, pouting. “I think anger is just your default. Maybe you shouldn't blame other people for making you feel that way when it's clear you just like being angry.”
Shizuo cracks his knuckles. “You want me to throw you after your book? You could be reunited in no time, you shitty louse.” He swings at Izaya, but Izaya sinks into the chair to dodge it, does some swanky little maneuver that has him sprinting out of the classroom. Shizuo chases after him, a wide smile on his face.
The other students clear the way for them, a few of them cheering. Shizuo and Izaya are infamous for this kind of thing, and the fact it's been so long only makes it more fun. Shizuo can't deny he likes chasing after Izaya, especially because catching him seems impossible. Shizuo doesn't worry about hurting him, doesn't worry about holding back.
He wonders if Izaya finds it fun, too.
They wind up outside the school, Shizuo throwing rocks at Izaya, who keeps dodging them, cackling as he does so. It occurs to Shizuo that they're really only playing around at this point, and that's when a teacher marches outside to yell at them. Izaya waggles his eyebrows at Shizuo over the teacher's shoulder, and Shizuo bites his lip to keep from laughing.
That afternoon, Shizuo finds himself walking alongside Izaya, Shinra, and Kadota. Shinra and Kadota are talking to Izaya about tests and school, and Shinra's hand is curled into Izaya's sleeve.
Shizuo speaks before he can think about it.
“Do you have to always be so goddamn touchy?”
“Ah, this again?” Shinra asks. “Does it really bother you so much?”
“You're in love with Celty. You shouldn't act like you're in love with Izaya, too.”
A silence hangs between them, but Izaya is smirking. Of course he is.
“Love!” Shinra laughs. “As if it's love! I told you already that Izaya is just mine! There's no love to it.”
“You really aren't nice, Shinra,” Izaya says, though he doesn't seem affected at all. “You've got the personality of a goblin.”
“Now that's not nice,” Shinra replies, and he hugs Izaya's arm. “You like my personality!”
“It is kind of weird,” Kadota says, putting a calming hand on Shizuo's shoulder. “What does that even mean, that Izaya is yours?”
“It means he's mine! He doesn't like anyone else, and Celty won't accept my feelings just yet, so why shouldn't I have someone around that I like?” Shinra frowns like he doesn't get it, but then he goes back to nuzzling into Izaya, who tries to push him away to no avail. “Izaya-kun is pretty! And he's cuddly once you get past the sharp edges.”
“I will slit your throat and feed you to the plants.”
“You won't!”
“Whatever, man. It really is weird,” Kadota says with a shrug.
“Well, it doesn't concern either of you anyway,” Shinra says matter-of-factly. He tugs Izaya along, and Shizuo is so blinded by rage that he almost knocks over an unassuming businessman.
That night, Shizuo is pacing around the living room, angry for reasons he doesn't understand. Kasuka is watching with a bored expression.
“It's just fucking weird! How can you claim ownership of someone? Isn't it creepy? It's fucking creepy!” Shizuo grumbles and throws his hands up.
“Why does it bother you so much?” Kasuka asks. “If Izaya-san doesn't mind it, why do you?”
“Because!” Shizuo snaps. He doesn't elaborate, but Kasuka nods anyway.
“I see.”
“See what?”
“You like Izaya-san.”
If it was anyone else, Shizuo would snap their neck, but instead he freezes in place and stares at his little brother.
“What'd you say?” he asks.
“You like Izaya-san. It's kind of obvious, I guess. I just didn't think you liked him this much,” Kasuka says.
“I do not like that fucking—“
“Don't you?” Kasuka asks, and then he takes a sip of the tea he brought with him.
Shizuo opens his mouth, closes it again, and then roars in wordless rage. His mother rushes into the room and chastises him, so he goes into his room and screams into his pillow instead.
***
A few days pass before he sees Izaya again.
Izaya is in that same classroom, and when Shizuo enters, Izaya holds his book to him warily.
“This is a first edition, Shizu-chan, so if you throw this one, I'll be pretty—“
“You shouldn't let Shinra touch you like that. You know I hate it.”
“...Huh?”
“I told you before that I don't like it! He shouldn't claim ownership of you! Why do you let him? Doesn't it bother you?! He does it like you're not even a real person, like you're a doll!”
“Shizu-chan—“
“Does he do it just to piss me off?! Is that what it's about?! I'll kill him! I'll kill him and you!”
Izaya stands, and before Shizuo can say anything else, he feels soft pressure against his mouth. He blinks and pulls back to see Izaya is grinning, his face flushed.
“You're jealous,” Izaya says, and Shizuo growls, pulls Izaya into another kiss before he can think better of it.
“Don't like it,” Shizuo murmurs between their lips meeting. “Don't like it at all...”
“Why's that, Shizu-chan?” Izaya asks, and he nips Shizuo's lip playfully.
“You fucking know why.”
He presses Izaya into the wall and devours his mouth, loves the way Izaya curls around him. It seems so simple now that they're kissing like this. Shizuo doesn't know how he didn't realize sooner that this is what he wanted.
“You don't want to share?” Izaya asks, and he laughs softly. “Selfish, aren't you?”
Shizuo kisses him again in answer, and Izaya shuts up instantly. That's a handy trick. Shizuo will definitely remember it.
When the day ends, and they're leaving the school together, Shizuo's eyes narrow as Shinra takes his usual spot beside Izaya and clings to his arm. With a growl, Shizuo lifts Izaya, pulling him into his own side.
“Touch him again and I'll break your arms,” he says to Shinra, who pouts very openly, wailing something about them not being allowed to like each other until Celty returns his feelings. Shizuo ignores him and focuses instead on the way Izaya feels beside him, exactly where he belongs.
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gokubrain · 3 years
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Hi! What is Age 801 about (was it a DBS thing? I kinda refuse to watch DBS and have only read the Trunks/Goku Black arc, Moro arc, and [now] Granola arc)? Also, can we get some more canonically gay moments with Goku and Vegeta, please? Preferably DBZ and screenshots are a bonus. :-D Thanks! XOXOXO
HII buckle in this is a long one LOL
Age 801:
for starters, i've talked briefly abt age 801 on my twitter before but i'd be glad to talk about it here too HAHA
though i haven't actually played this first hand so i won't go into too much detail in fear of giving wrong information. BUT BASICALLY there was this game called Dragon Ball Online, which "was a massive multiplayer online role-playing game being developed in Japan and South Korea by NTL, set in the Dragon Ball universe." again i didnt play it but from what i understand it takes place 200 ish years after the end of the buu arc in dbz.
age 801 is the year of goku's death, but it goes deeper than that LOL
APPARENTLY as goku realized his time to die was approaching, he reached out to vegeta, and the two of them LEFT EARTH WITHOUT A WORD and traveled to a far away planet in the middle of no where to have one final battle where they both went out in a blaze of glory. i don't remember where i heard this but apparently their death battle caused a supernova that was seen from earth years later
guys?? if that's not the most fucking homoerotic and romantic thing you have ever heard than ur a liar HAHAHDFJH
ALSO THIS STORYLINE WAS APPROVED BY TORIYAMA WHICH IS ABOUT AS CLOSE TO CANON AS ANYTHING LIKE THIS IS EVER GONNA GET SO. personally i'm considering this the locked in, canonical ending for them because it's just SO perfect.
this idea that goku wanted to provide a sense of closure regarding their rivalry,, the fact that vegeta was just on board with dying like this before his time simply because he didn't want to live without goku,,, GOKU KNOWING THIS AS TRUE AND EVEN DECIDING THAT HE WANTED TO DIE ALONGSIDE VEGETA IN THE FIRST PLACE... OH THANK YOU DRAGON BALL ONLINE THANK YOU SO MUCH <3
i desperately wish i had more info on this to tell you, but i never played the game and the wiki is painfully short so !! like i wonder how long they were traveling before they found a planet far enough away,, if it took years to see the supernova then they must have been traveling for a very very long time. ALSO A SUPERNOVA??? HOW FUCKING SEXY IS THAT LOL, I LOVE SPACE/STAR IMAGERY IN TERMS OF KAKAVEGE (COUGH YOU ARE THE SUN AND I AM JUST THE PLANETS SPINNING AROUND YOU COUGH COUGH) to think that their simultaneous deaths erupted in a supernova...... god it jsut warms my heart so much THANK YOU dragon ball online
Kakavege Canon Stuff:
and nice timing, i was just looking for someone to talk with about this particular scene LOL
i'm rewatching dbz rn and i'm really obsessed with this one little filler arc that happens immediately after the saiyan arc. vegeta's on his way to some freeza planet to heal up, and goku's hospitalized. it's not very much content bc it's actually just a little side-thing that's shown while the Real filler is happening but i still love it regardless
i'm soo obsessed with this cinematic parallel here LOL i love that they're both healing from this battle at the same time but theyre also both thinking about what happened like. a LOT lol, pretty much any time either of them are on screen they're thinking about the fight that just happened HAHA
vegeta is literally floating in a healing pod dreaming about the fight whispering "kakarot" over and over?? and goku keeps sneaking out of the hospital to train for when vegeta comes back??
it's so cute LOL goku keeps like. getting out of bed and trying to train for when vegeta gets back and they're all like dude,,, ur seriously injured pls just stay in bed LOL
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ITS HARD TO TELL BUT HE'S DOING SIT UPS HERE LOL
even outside of kakavege i think this is so fucking cute LOL HE'S LIKE "GUYYYSSS I'M FINE JUST LET ME TRAIN" AND THEYRE LIKE GOKU LMFAOFJDSJKFH YOURE IN A FULL BODY CAST....
but this concept that he's pushing himself wayyyy past his limits because he's so excited to fight vegeta again is just so precious wahhhh
ALSO THERES THIS ONE REALLY GOOD SCENE WHERE IT SHOWS VEGETA THINKING ABOUT GOKU AND THEN IT CUTS TO GOKU RANDOMLY PUNCHING THE AIR AND EVERYONE IS LIKE "GOKU?? WTF" AND HE'S LIKE "LOL SORRY I GOT EXCITED"AHAHKJFDSHA IM ABSOLUTELY OBSESSED WITH THE LIKE. PARALLELS BETWEEN THEM WHERE THEYRE JUST BOTH THINKING ABOUT EACH OTHER AT THE SAME TIME ITS SO CUTE
i cant show it very well in screenshots but trust me the scene transition from vegeta talking abt the fight to goku just punching the air?? is so cute
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if u wanna see it for urself i'll link it here, timestamp is 9:49
idk i just love it a lot LOL I KNOW ITS KINDA SMALL AND SEEMS LIKE IM REALLY GRASPING HERE BUT,, IDK I MEAN. the way the show sets it up so that's its like. vegeta in a healing pod saying "kakarot" (and NOTHING ELSE HAPPENS IN THE SCENE BTW HE'S JUST LIKE. "KAKAROT,,," AND THEN IT TRANSITIONS AHHA FDJH) and then immediately cuts to goku trying to sneak out of the hospital to train for vegeta's return (or smth similar)?? like the show is obviously trying to set up this parallel here between them and like. idk whether this is intentional or not but it DOES come off pretty gay imo LMAODJFJH
AND LIKE. OKAY i know vegeta's excuse is revenge and i know goku's excuse is wanting to protect earth when vegeta returns but,,, u also have to remember that goku LET VEGETA GO FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE OF SEEING HIM AGAIN LOL SO LIKE. basically this whole scene is goku being like "omg i'm too excited i can't just sit here in the hospital?? i have to train i have to be ready for him" LOL
this entire little filler is just so... like idk i feel like. during the fight they both had some wild thoughts and emotions flying around that they couldn't really sit down and piece together at that time (because.... they were amidst a life or death battle LOL) but this downtime is really important, like the seed has been planted and now they're both gonna spend time sitting here stewing and thinking about each other?? like this is IT, this is the first of many, many times that they'll be thinking about one another. this is how feelings start blooming hehe
one more thing, there's this scene where goku sneaks out of the hospital successfully and goes to train in the middle of nowhere but he overexerts himself terribly and falls, and as he's about to fall to his death he starts thinking about vegeta LOL
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THIS HAPPENS A LOT BUT WHENEVER GOKU IS ABOUT TO DIE HE HAS A HABIT OF USING VEGETA AS LIKE. AN ANCHOR TO KEEP HIMSELF ALIVE AND PUSH FORWARD LOL
LIKE THIS INFAMOUS SCENE FROM MUCH LATER ON:
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GOKU'S ON THE EDGE OF GETTING HIS ASS ABSOLUTELY KICKED AND HE STARTS HALLUCINATING ABOUT VEGETA?/AHGHADHFJJSDHGF
OKAY REWIND PLEASE I HAVE TO TALK ABOUT THIS SCENE.
OKAY,,, LIKE. OKAY. OBVIOUSLY, WHY IS HE NAKED. OBVIOUSLY. GOKU?? HELLO????
BUT THIS JUST FUCKING PROVESHAHSDH GOKU USES VEGETA AS LIKE. A SOURCE OF COMFORT WHEN HIS BACK IS AGAINST A WALL!! HE USES VEGETA TO PUSH HIMSELF JUST AS MUCH AS VEGETA USES GOKU TO PUSH HIMSELF !! THEY'RE LITERALLY SO FDHSGJHKBDG
I COULD TALK ALL DAY ABOUT THE SCENE WHERE VEGETA GETS ALL VULNERABLE BEFORE DYING AND BEGS GOKU TO KILL FREEZA AND THEN GOKU BURIES HIM BECAUSE IT MAKES ME SO SO EMOTIONAL BUT I HAVE TO STOP HERE LOL i'm losing my mind
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Hello there! May I request a LOTR matchup please? My name is Christina and I’m an ENFJ-T demifemale who’s bisexual but with a male preference. Overall, I’m very sweet, friendly, kind and open minded. Some people consider me a Mom figure and come to me for advice. A lot of people say I’m academically and socially intelligent in a lot of situations. I’m kind of an old soul too and I believe in romantic notions of love and honest personalities. However, I tend to be insecure, sensitive, and withdrawn if I’m really stressed out. I have some anger and emotional issues that I’m still trying to resolve from past trauma.  I tend to get fatigued from taking care of others rather than myself.  However, I’m still doing my best to balance that out with self love and kindness too! I can be really stubborn at times. I also have autism, ADHD, anxiety, and depression.  I’m fiercely protective of my loved ones and I will get into a fight if someone hurts them. Most of all I believe in listening to the voice of the underdog and fighting alongside them if needed. I have a very strong sense of ideals and justice by the way lol. My favorite things are sweets/pastries, tea, drawing, reading, writing, dancing, and playing guitar. I dislike thunderstorms, insects, dolls, supernatural stuff, Salisbury steak, people yelling at me, scratchy clothing, and bullies. I think that’s all I have to say about myself. I would also like to request gifs, a relationship theme song, and a one shot to go with this matchup. Feel free to do this if you want to thank you! 🙏💕
Hello dear thanks for the matchup 💖
For lotr I ship you with:
Thranduil 👑
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- holy lord Christina! You have the best chemistry in all of the movies. Your motherly kindness is what drew him into you. he understands you so much he doesn't even have to speak to know how you feel you lucky duck💖.
- your fierce and protective nature is something he is also attracted too. He is passionate himself and he would fight to protect everything for you.
- he is the type of person to only show Christina his queen affection in private. So he would sit there hugging you while you feel calm in his presence.
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- you have a soft touch that can calm his temper. He doesn't like humans nor dwarfs so you help him realise not all races are bad. he may not be the most friendliest person but to you, your his world.
- he kisses you when the battle is over realising you were alive and well.
Christina: thranduil are you alright
Thranduil: yes my dear I'm fine how about you *looks at face with his stone cold eyes*
Christina: I'm fine my king I just need to rest
Thranduil: Christina forgive me I should've been there *holds Christina tight*
Christina: my love I truly am- *gets smooched by the cold man's exterior*
Thranduil: my Christina I shall never let you go *plants his lips on Christina softly*
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- thranduil can be jealous at the best of times so be sure to keep an eye on your man cause he may cause a scene if you were with anyone else.
- you wear the highest fashion an elf can have. You can't exactly go a day without long, elegant dresses and a small oak crown. Your a queen it's expected.
- he loves tea as much as you so he would order new flavours just to please you.
- your intelligence is quite interesting when he first meets you he is taken by your wits.
- omg he is like a girl with a high-school crush when he witnesses Christina walking by he's internally screaming trying not to freak out.
- when you draw he often tries to figure out who it is. He would order you to draw him and if you refuse he will understand but he admires your talent.
- he is quite the possessive type as well when Christina is often alone in the forest for a stroll he will randomly come up and hold your hand while he looks red as a beet.
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- Christina and thranduils wedding would be by the castle with thousands attending. You would wear a beautiful long elegant dress. Everyone attends. Christinas child would have blonde hair and her eyes. The new heir to the throne a half elf and human hybrid.
Your theme song:
- so for the oneshot I decided to do a fluff oneshot where Christina is drawing in the forest and thranduils curious.
Christina was in the forest, the sun was shining and her hair flowed within the wind. She wore a beautiful, elegant white dress with a crown. She was sketching the birds upon the trees when she couldn't hear the footsteps appear behind her.
Thranduil stood tall and proud watching the strange girl draw. "My dear whatever are you doing at this time of the day" he raises an eyebrow. The elf looked elegant his hair straight and eyes full of passion.
"drawing my king like it~" Christina smiled showing her husband the drawing. "Christina this is beautiful, I shall hang it in the grand hall" he smiles at the beautiful art piece.
Christina stands up while shoving her head into his side. She grabs his hand in a loving way "I always valued our time together". She stroked his cheek as thranduil closed his eyes listening to the girls voice.
Thranduil leans in kissing the woman that changed his life. The two were a beautiful couple that many envied to the point thranduil would die for her.
Christina truly had something special it was enough to make the king of the elf's fall for her.
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Anyways that's all I have for now:
Ta ta 💫
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arsonistvoyager · 4 years
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My Angel // Anakin Skywalker x Senator!Reader
 Pairing: Anakin Skywalker x Reader
Summary: Meeting your secret lover Anakin after a long day in the Galactic Senate
a/n: A friend of mine suggested I write some Anakin content and I really wanted to because there’s definitely not enough out there and I really wanted to see if I could write for him! She requested some fluff and I’m ALWAYS a slut for fluff lol 
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Whenever Orn Free Ta started speaking during Senatorial meetings it presented a great challenge to not fall asleep in front of the eyes of thousands of representatives of the republic. 
The Twi’lek – though his voice was anything but monotone and boring – had the special talent to take a topic and twist it into a never ending monologue about the glory of the Republic and his important and very necessary role in it. And after he finished one of said monologues you felt like the discussion had been thrown back by at least a day. Not that the Senate ever managed to agree on something in less than a week on an average day of course. 
You let your eyes roam the vast building, observing a few of the senators you knew. They landed on the senator of Taanab, slouching in his repulsorpod and to your delight you saw him struggle to keep his eyes open as well. 
Ta’s speech would be the last of the day and you were more than eager to leave the senate building and relax in your luxurious apartment on the other side of the district. You cast a quick glance towards Mas Amedda. You knew he had his eyes everywhere and you wanted to make sure nobody noticed as you pulled out a holopad, from one of the pockets of your gown. It blinked continuously, signaling you that you had received several messages during your meeting. One of your perfectly manicured fingers scrolled through all of them before you let out a soft sigh and tucked the device away. 
He had told you he would find a com-center in the lower parts of coruscant as soon as he arrived back home to let you know of his arrival. You had checked the pad all day, sneaking a lot of glances at it whenever you could, but you had not received his message yet. It probably meant the mission would take longer and that he would not return today either. 
You understood of course. Anakin Skywalker was a Jedi General after all and one of the best in the entire order at that! He had lives to save and evil sith to fight. You felt a little selfish for wanting him to be by your side at all times, but it had been almost a month now since the last time you had seen him in person and almost a week since he had contacted you through a holo-call on one of their bases on Farstine. 
“My Angel.” he had said as he lifted his hand to place it where your cheek would have been. And you had closed your eyes and leaned into the holographic touch, pretending to feel the warmth of his actual hand on your skin. The next day you had smiled innocently when the Farstinian Senator had walked past you in the halls. 
You missed him and you knew he missed you. You had seen it in his eyes, when you looked at his hologram. Mas Ameddas loud, hard voice interrupted your daydream of Anakins eyes as he called for the end of the meeting. You had not even heard Senator Ta finish his speech but you were more than glad it was over. 
Out of politeness you sat still in your seat for a few more seconds until you saw other senators retreat out of the hall and most likely to their hoverlimos. You didn’t even want to imagine the gossip that would spread about you in the upper levels of Coruscant, especially the high society of the city, if you ran out of your repulsorpod and into the arms of your driver to get out as soon as possible. 
That was one aspect of the life of a senator you absolutely despised. Every single one of your moves being closely observed and documented for the citizens to see like some sort of reality tv show. The seconds felt like minutes that you sat there unmoving, while you could have spent them in surrounded by bubbles and exotic oils in the sizable whirlpool your apartment provided you with – watching the sun set on Coruscant and the colorful lights of the many buildings that covered it lighting up the ecumenopolis. 
Finally you saw Senator Organa stand up and took it as your own polite cue to leave. You tried to make your way through the round halls of your assigned level as fast as you could, avoiding as many people as you could and making sure you said your goodbye’s as quick as you could to make as little unnecessary conversation as possible. 
One windy but fortunately very fast ride in your personal hoverlimo later you arrived at the gates of your apartment. While laying your hand on the biometric scan that opened your doors you nodded and smiled at the clones that were guarding your safe haven and they tilted their helmeted heads in response, until you finally rushed inside. Right as you heard the doors shut closed behind you, you felt an imaginary weight fall of your shoulders and sighed heavily, your body slumping visibly. The day had been long and you were pretty sure you did not want to see a single human, nor humanoid species or any other intelligent species the galaxy had to offer for the rest of the evening. “My Angel.”
Well – maybe with one exception.
“I’ve missed you so much.” There he sat, leaned back on your expensive sofa, elbows resting on its back, legs wide apart and planted firmly on the ground. To Grievous’ deepest depths of despair with that relaxing bath. This was much better than being surrounded by bubbles and foam. 
Anakin did not even bother standing up when he saw you practically jumping into his arms. “You’re back?” “Why didn’t you tell me?” “You told me you would send me a coded message!” “Are you alright? Are you injured? Exhausted?” “Maker am I happy to see you…” “Ani you will not believe the Banthafodder that escaped Orn Free Ta’s lips today!”
You had not even realized you’d been brabbling his ears off until he let out a loud snort and started laughing. Maker how you had missed his wonderful laugh. Or the way he would close his eyes when he did it. Or the way he threw his head back when he was particularly happy. 
Before he answered you however he put his gloved hands around your thighs and lifted you out of the awkward position you had landed in and into a much more comfortable position on his lap. You reacted immediately by wrapping your arms around his neck, while he simultaneously wrapped his around your waist. 
Finally you leaned your head on the small space between his neck and his chest and sighed once more. “We arrived only an hour ago. I wanted to contact you right away but then Fives and Tup invited me to a drink in 79’s and I thought maybe surprising you would be even better.” 
His hands rubbed tenderly on your back as he spoke. “The look on your face when you saw me was priceless.” You lifted your head to look into those gorgeous blue eyes of his that you had fantasized about earlier. They shone bright with joy and happiness. A successful mission you suspected. 
You opened your mouth for an answer but instead decided to kiss him. It had been much too long and you could tell he felt the same way because he practically melted in your touch. Both of your lips touching felt like a puzzle piece falling perfectly into its place. You moved yours softly and Anakin responded by tilting his head and doing the same. 
Leaning back even further on the couch he pulled your down with him, one of his hands wandering to your hair and gripped your head softly. When you poked out your tongue in between your lips and licked alongside his full ones he groaned quietly into your mouth. An equally quiet giggle escaped your lips, after you felt him tighten his grip around you. 
“No 79’s drink in the world is as sweet as your lips, Angel.”, he whispered when the two of you parted your lips. You looked into his eyes once more and saw how much softer they had gotten. 
Ahsoka had told you once how she only recognized that look appeared on Anakins eyes exclusively whenever he looked at you and you had blushed at the thought, a small smile gracing your lips before you pressed them together to a thin line. The fear of being caught by the jedi council was ever present and resided deep inside you. You glanced at Ahsoka cautiously before she winked at you and turned away to walk back to the clone troopers. You knew back then that the young padawan would keep your secret safe. 
Recounting the memory you smiled to yourself, your eyes focused on Anakins lower lip. Anakin brushed a strand of hair out of your eyes and back into the intricately styled hairstyle you had worn to the senate meeting. “Hey”, he called out. “Are you thinking about another man? I’m the only one that should occupy your thoughts.” 
You knew he was joking, but you also knew he could easily get jealous and decided to play along with him.   “You’ve caught me. He’s a tall, beautiful, brave hero that has the most beautiful luscious hair in the galaxy.” Your hand reached up to brush through his dark blonde locks before trailing down towards his cheek and he reacted by leaning into your hand, closing his eyes to savor your touch. “Whenever he looks at me with his beautiful blue eyes I get lost in them and wish to never return to the real world again.”
Anakin opened his eyes and again they were shining like diamonds. “His name is Flanakin Smytalker. You’ve probably heard of him he is very famous and adored.” Anakin chuckled and placed his hand over yours. “The name rings a few bells. I obviously have no chance against him.” 
He turned your hand over to kiss your palm before wrapping it around his neck again. “Sadly he ran off with another senator.” You sighed dramatically and Anakin grinned widely. “But I think I can make do with the most wonderful jedi in the galaxy.” You leaned your head back onto his chest and closed your eyes, while his lips brushed against your ear delicately.
“And I think I know exactly what we can do for you to forget him. If I recall correctly your thoughts earlier were occupied with nothing but a bubblebath and the sunset of coruscant. Would you mind if I join?” 
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a/n: Writing has been extremely fun lately so I think I will try to do it daily for a while! I’ve also thought about taking requests since I’m out of ideas and I would love to hear other peoples! So keep an eye out for an additional post where I may announce that I’ll be taking requests.
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tapestry 👑 XV
Warnings: eventual dark elements (tags to be added as fic continues)
This is dark!(king)Steve and explicit. 18+ only.
Summary: King Steven had a wandering eye but you never thought it would fall upon you.
This Chapter: The pieces begin to move.
Note: Alright I eked out another chapter so here we go, on 15! already. What the hell y’all? This is wild. I mean come on. Wowee. Anyways, I’m running out of ways to thank you guys so just read the chapter already, lol.
masterlist
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There was a bench on the upper floors where you liked to sit and watch the snow fall. Since your isolation, it had become ritual. You and Marge would perch on the wooden seat and stare out into the royal gardens, the hedges barren and coated in white. The sky was a pale shade of grey and the castle wall loomed like a giant sleeping beneath the snow. You found yourself lulled but the rare sense of peace.
Close to peace. It was hard to forget all that had consumed the court with a guard at your back. It was harder to escape the fixation which had overcome all; the two kings in the single castle. Steven and T’Challa met daily and spent many hours together; whether alongside council or otherwise. And when they were apart, you were often in the presence of your king.
It was only a few days since your encounter with T’Challa. The king was well-received within the kingdom by your father’s accounts and despite the underlying scandal, there was a sense of joy left over from the yuletide; albeit, only among those able to indulge it.
Footsteps approached from around the corner and you glanced over at the shadow which appeared before its owner. Your guard turned to watch Lord Barnes as he strode swiftly through the corridor. The dark-haired noble nodded as he approached the sentinel and stopped short to bow to you in kind. He was fidgety and impatient.
“Lord Barnes,” You rose and curtsied to him as the bench separated you. “What has you in such a hurry?”
“Courtly business,” he said brusquely. “Most pressing.”
“Is that it?” You squinted. “You’ve never seemed so bothered by courtly business.”
“When it is such as this, I must be bothered,” He countered. “Why do you linger in the corridor, lady?”
“I haven’t anywhere else to linger,” You replied. “I am without my own business these days.”
“Only the king’s,” His lips curved slightly as his own quip. 
“Only the king’s,” You affirmed. “As I’m sure you’ve been occupied. I’ve not seen you quite so often since the yuletide.”
“You never saw me very often before,” He returned. “My apologies if I am curt but I should be upon my way.”
“I should let you on your way if you tell me what calls you so urgently.” You watched his blue eyes as they strayed down the hall. 
“I suppose… you will not hear it otherwise,” He sighed. “A warrant has been served upon Ladies Stark and Wilson. They’ve surrendered to custody this morning during their attendance of the queen. They’ve been taken to the Fort.”
“Arrested?” You gasped and looked to Marge. “For what?”
“I cannot speak further on this,” He said. “I must go and you should return to your chambers. News will reach you shortly. Good day.”
He bowed his head and turned on his heel. You blinked and scurried around the bench. “No, no, Lord Barnes,” You called after him as you followed. “I would surmise you do go to the king.”
“You would suppose correct,” He kept his strides long and harried. “And I would be overdue.”
“Then I shall accompany you for I must see him, too,” You insisted as you finally came up next to him. Marge and your guard followed behind.
“You should wait,” He peeked over at you. “He will be engaged already.”
“I tire of waiting on him,” You said. “You may tell him I forced myself upon you, but I will see him.”
“Lord, if it wasn’t for that mailed bastard behind me I’d drag you back to your chambers myself and lock you up,” He grumbled, “And I suppose that’d be the only obstacle to keep you from your intent.”
“It would,” You assured him and raised your chin as you lifted skirts to keep pace with him. “Though perhaps it would be just as amusing to have you fight my guard.”
He grunted but said nothing further. He walked silently at your side, eyes set ahead of him as his impatience radiated around you. When you reached the king’s chambers, the guards greeted you with a pair of nods and one knocked on the large wooden doors. It was opened without delay.
Barnes waited for you to enter first and several men sat already with the king; including your own father. They looked to you and stood as the king did. Confusion marred his face as he glanced between you and Lord Barnes.
“My lady, what are you– I–” He stopped himself and huffed. “My lords, if you would continue onto the council chambers, I do have matters to attend to. Lord Barnes if you would remain.”
The king crossed his arms as he waited for his commands to be obeyed. Your father rose with the five other men and passed you with a pointed look. “Mind yourself, daughter,” He breathed before he slipped through the door. The footsteps shuffled out into the hall until at last the door was closed behind you.
“I asked you to come alone, Buck,” The king said. 
“I did not ask her to come, she insisted upon it,” He shook his head. “If it were up to me, I’d have strapped her down but your damned dog does follow at her heels.”
“That damned dog’s bite is keeping her safe,” The king retorted. “It doesn’t matter. She is here…” He paused and looked to you. “Why?”
“Do you think I do not grow frustrated by the oblivion you keep me in, your highness?” You neared slowly and stopped just behind the chairs which faced his large desk. “Would you blame my curiosity that I should know why you’ve have two of the queen’s ladies accosted?”
“It was their husbands who turned them in,” He said. “They came to me and they did say that their wives spoke the most traitorous words. As king, with a poisoning so recent, I cannot let them away.”
“Traitorous words? Whatever could they have said?” You asked as you brought a hand up to grip the back of the chair.
“They’ve merely been taken to be interviewed, my lady,” The king sniffed. “I did not tell you because I did hope to spare you the worry. For a time, at least. You have been so distressed, I would not further your difficulties.”
“To be interviewed? In the Fort?” You crinkled your brow. “My king, I can admit my naivete, but I will not feign stupidity.”
“Can you not guess at what they may be asked? At what they will surely admit?” Steven planted his hands on his desk as he leaned on it. “I do this to keep us safe. To keep you safe.”
“And I do know that, I do,” You clutched your hands together. “But I would not have another hurt for my well-being. And upon what suspicion? Upon what proof?”
“Upon the boy who did die upon your chamber floor,” Steven insisted. “Upon the fear that does claw at my heart constantly. For the love I have for you.”
“Your love is kind, I should hate to see it turn so cruel upon others,” You said. “Would you not have mercy upon my request?”
“Mercy cannot be had anymore,” He looked to his desk, the mess of papers atop it.
“And if they say the words you expect of them, what then?”
“Then we should interview the queen.” He shrugged and avoided your gaze.
“And should she be found to be conspiring, you would…well, what should be here fate?”
“Exile, death?” He looked up at you. “If she commits treason, she should earn whatever fate she receives. A fate that would leave us to be together.”
“And I should claim her spot knowing that is what befell her?”
“You should claim her spot loyally and with grace,” His voice deepened as he pushed himself straight. “You should heed my orders and listen to me for I am your king.”
“I have obeyed you. I have bided you, I have been patient, I–”
“You are still but an earl’s daughter,” He spat and you flinched.
“Your highness,” Lord Barnes intoned gently. You’d forgotten of his presence as he stepped forward. “You must understand her fear. She does not speak maliciously.”
“She speaks too much. I’ve seen her comfortable, I’ve her well, aliv, even,” The king ranted. “And with our union almost in sight, she would persist.”
“She would protect herself. She is young, how is she to understand all this? How is she to fathom that a queen she knew once to be kind and hospitable has turned cruel and maniacal?”
“She needn’t understand any of that, she only need love me as I do her,” Steven hissed. “For she is the only wife I would have.”
“Your highness,” You said quietly, “I did not mean… Lord Barnes is right.” You slowly rounded the desk. Cautious as you feared he would lash out in his anger. His face red with his temper. “I did not mean to rile you, I only meant to understand this all. Your highness…” 
You touched his chest and felt your heart hammering. You looked at Barnes from the corner of your eye and he nodded subtly.
“If all this would go wrong, it would all be over.” You soothed as you rubbed the silk of his overcoat. “And that does worry me.”
He searched your face and slowly placed his hand atop yours. He unclenched his jaw and exhaled. “I have told you I shall see you safe, see us together. I meant it. You do not need to worry, my love.”
“I know,” You said softly. “‘But may I ask of you one thing?”
“You shall ask of me anything,” He breathed.
“If it should be that Eleanor does conspire, would you have mercy upon her? For me?”
“It would be not upon my mercy that she is judged,” The king said firmly. “There is a party of cardinals traveling now from the See. They will hold the trial, they will lay their judgement, and issue their own sentence. It is… beyond my control.”
“So… you assume there should be evidence enough for a trial?” You questioned.
“There would be,” He confirmed. “But I did not call the cardinals upon the expectation of a murder trial, merely that of an annulment.”
“Murder?” You frowned.
“The death of a servant is nothing, but intent to kill a king, that is treason,” He said softly. “Even a queen cannot commit such a crime.”
You lowered your head. Stunned. Your lip trembled as your heart stuttered. For it came upon you at that very moment that you could not delay the king forever. That all that he had done could not be reversed. And foremost, it occur red to you, that another should die to break this stalemate.
“My lady, we should rejoice,” The king brought two fingers up under your chin to raise your head. “For one day, I shall call you my wife, I am certain of it now.”
👑
That night, you sat before the hearth and thought. You had supped alone as the king tended to his business. The thought made you shiver; of all that he was orchestrating, of the role you’d played in it. For all your willful ignorance, you were just as guilty as him. Was all this worth something as low as your reputation?
There was a rap at the door as you stared at the burning long. The crust of orange embers along it, the pale smoke that billowed up into the chimney. You waved a hand at Marge as another knock sounded and you rubbed your forehead. Your obstinacy had led to this; your insistence on being above the role of mistress. The want to follow your own will when that had never been a lady’s place.
The creak of the door and Marge’s gasp irked you. You looked to the door as your servant bowed and recited a mousy “your highness.” You stood at once and made to bow.
“Don’t you bother with that,” The queen swept in, her burgundy skirts curled around her legs as she came to a stop before you. “I came to talk not to have you simper to my face.”
“I never simpered,” You protested. “I was only ever honest to you.”
“Yes, the morally unstained lady,” She scowled. “You know what he’s done?”
“I do.” You said evenly.
“And you did not try to stop him? Did I betray you so entirely you would see me thus?” 
“Stop him? How should I do that when you never could?” You backed away from her and wrapped your arms around yourself. “I was hurt that you used me but I was never vengeful. If I had a hand in any of this, it was not intentional.”
“Why did you not relent to him?” She asked. 
“Why did you banish me? Why did you rig my saddle?” You turned on her. “Why did you hate me for the very affair you instigated?”
“The saddle… was a mistake. I only meant to scare you away. Truly. I did not intend for you to be maimed. or worse, killed. But I did not think in my anger.” Her green eyes were like glass. “I banished you because I was humiliated. I could bear Rose and those other mistresses in my husband’s bed, but I could not bear you taking the place that even I could never reach.”
“I never meant for it and it is too late for me too. In my fear, I reassured him. In my naivety, I gave his desires credence. I am guilty, yes, of enabling him, but it does not mean I condone him,” You shook your head as your eyes stung. “And so we are both backed into a corner and we must play our parts. We must move each square within the rules and hope that neither is victorious, but that we can achieve a draw.”
“You know that will not happen,” She said grimly. “But will you not go to him? Ask him to spare me. My life, at least?”
“I did.” You said plainly. “I tried and he has reminded me of how powerless I truly am. We all are. For if he should do this to a princess born to be queen, what shall he do to me one day?”
“You…”
“I begged him and he would’ve turned on me too if I had not retreated,” You picked at your sleeve as you spoke. “His mind is set, and so too are our fates.”
“You would let him exile me?” She gasped. “Kill me, even?”
“It isn’t my choice,” You withheld the tears as your voice threatened to crack. “You know that.”
She tore her eyes away and looked down at the carpet. She sniffed and nodded as she raised her head. “I know it.” She said. “I only came here because… they’ve all left me. I have no one else.” She turned and her velvet skirts grazed the floor around her feet. “And because I want you to know, while I did tamper with your horse, I did not send you that poison.” 
She stopped at the door and glanced back at you. Her eyes were glossy but determined. “I never wanted you dead, I only wanted my pride.”
“I’m sorry.” You said quietly.
“No, I am,” She inhaled and let her breath out heavily. “Goodbye. I do think this will be the last time we should speak, my lady.”
“I hope it is not, your highness.” You returned.
“Cling to that hope for as long as you can,” She bit down and swallowed back her grief. Marge stood at the ready with her hand upon the door handle. “For he will take that from you, too.”
👑
Three days after the ladies were arrested, you broke fast with your father. He was elated. The ladies were under guard in the Fort and the gaolers were about their work. The king was optimistic and so was the council. The cardinals were due in a week with good weather. Two, if poor.
You couldn’t find it in yourself to be hungry. Not your usual fear of poison but for the thought of the women in their cells. Of what they’re revelations may bring upon the queen; upon yourself; upon the entire kingdom. You pushed your food around your plate and bounced your foot nervously beneath your skirts. 
Months ago, your father would’ve found any excuse to elude your presence, but now he was all too eager to be near you. You realized, as you watched his fork poke into a bit of yolk, that he only sat upon council by your fortune. That if it were not for the king’s favour for his daughter, he’d still be a lowly in earl in a single chamber.
“Has mother sent word of when she would return to court?” You asked.
“I’ve told you daughter, we must wait for the winter to pass. She is not fit to travel in the cold.” He could not hide his exasperation. “She will come as soon as the roads are clear of ice but she is better for the time with your sister and her grandchild.”
You frowned. You thought to ask if Alice should return as well but that was likely upon Edward’s will. You set your fork aside and wiped your hands with your napkin.
“Perhaps the king would permit me a visit if I were to ask him again.” You ventured. “I feel so very alone, here.”
“You cannot leave.” He scoffed. “You will soon be betrothed to the king. And upon your marriage, well, queen.” He smiled greedily. “A queen cannot hide away with her sister in some country castle.”
“Queen?” You felt ill at the thought. “Oh, father, I should just be away with my virtue and accept any marriage the king would give me.”
“Oh, don’t be foolish!” He snapped. “You’ve not played this game so long to let the crown slip away.”
“It’s not a game to me. It’s my life,” You retorted. “I never wanted to be queen, I never wanted you to be councilor upon my shoulders. And yet that is the only thing I’ve ever done that has garnered your approval; an ounce of care beyond and yet it only goes so deep as to what benefit I can achieve for you, father.”
“You’ve dragged the king this far, you will see it through.” He snarled. “And when you do, our family will be among the highest nobility. We will sit at the king’s table, we will be known across each province.”
“If the day ever comes that I sit the throne, you will not sit at my table.” You sneered. “You can sit in your charlatan’s chair on the council and be happy with that.”
“You are as foolish as you were the day you were born.” He shook his head and slammed his fist on the table. “You don’t even know how close you are.”
“The queen remains. To speak of myself in her place is as good as treason.” You stood and dropped your napkin beside your plate. “Do not count your chickens, father.”
“Oh, but they are hatching,” He said before you could turn away. “The king signed the warrant this morning.” Slowly his face darkened as his mouth curved. You had never seen a beast so hideous. “Eleanor will join her ladies in the Fort.”
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bellatrixobsessed1 · 3 years
Text
Speak No Evil (Part 24)
Got this chapter done, now lets see if I can get the Azula & Alcina one done lol.
She is nearly certain that they are drawing closer to the spirit who now owns her voice; the jungle is growing denser--at points, almost impassably so--and the lesser spirits are tormenting her with more fury than they have in a while.
Her neck is a mess of pinch marks and her legs, arms, belly, and face are riddled with claw marks. She is beginning to fear infection, with so many welts to have to keep clean. She is frustrated to tears by the petty injuries.
“It’s alright.” Seicho reassures softly as she dabs a wet cloth to the princess’ arms. Though the water has come from the spirit pools and their crystalline, pure surfaces, she still doesn’t trust the water. Azula feels as though Seicho is rubbing bacterias into the cuts. Her legs are freshly bandaged and her arms are getting there. But they are running low on bandages, they’d only anticipated a few minor cuts or, perhaps, one or two larger accidents. They hadn’t accounted for a steady flow of superficial wounds.
Seicho sets her other arm down and Azula lifts her shirt. Seicho wrings the cloth out and brings it to the largest gash on her belly. This is the largest gash on her body. She cringes at the stinging flared up by the cloth. Water trickles cool and uncomfortably down her torso. The only worse discomfort comes from the second largest cut, a sharp throbbing on the back of her knee that hurts more and more every time she bends her leg. She is the most concerned about this one, alongside a decent clawmark near her armpit, this is the slash most likely to get infected.
“You doing okay?” Zuko asks.
Azula grits her teeth and nods. She is doing as well as she can. At least she has people to care for her, to help her cleans her wounds. She dabs a different cloth to her cheek and reaches for her parchment. Zhang-Zin hands it to her. ‘I hope that we find it soon.’ More so she hopes that their trip won’t be in vain. Agni forbid they’d come all this way just to be turned away.
She imagines a scenario where the spirit kills her for her audacity to approach it.
“It can’t be too far.” Mai shrugs. “The little ones wouldn’t be chittering this much if we weren’t getting close.” She confirms Azula’s own suspicions.
Azula climbs back to her feet and sighs. She is surprised that she can do even that. Seicho takes her hand and gives it a decent squeeze. This time it does very little to reassure her. With each step she feels that she is growing closer to her own complete and irreversible undoing. Closer to the second biggest mistake she’d ever make.
“That looks like it hurts.” Seicho remarks of one of the scratch marks on her arms. It is leaking quite steadily, three parallel trails of resentment gone unchecked.
‘It is more of an annoyance.’ She writes as she walks, nearly tripping over an unearthed root. It is more than just an annoyance though it isn’t quite pain either. Or perhaps it is and she has just grown used to it.  She has grown used to pain of several varieties and each is as unpleasant as the next.
“Are you sure that you’re going to be alright, Azula?” Zuko asks.
She gives him only a small nod. She is alright for now, though she isn’t certain that, that will be the case for much longer. She pushes aside a curtain of lichen and vine to reveal an enchanting jungle oasis. A dazzling spot where the veil between the physical and spirit worlds is precariously thin.
The water of the swimming hole is somehow purer than the pools that she has seen prior. Crystalline to the point where the ripples glitter and gleam regardless of how the sun hits them or if it hits them at all. At the edge of the treeline, plantlife is mundane, ordinary. It grows stranger and stranger still the closer it grows to the spirit pool. Azula steps over glowing flowers and fungi until she comes to iridescent plants that she has no name for. The smallest of the spirits linger around these plants, either eating from them or nesting within them.
And their music is sweet; their voices like the tinkling of chimes and the ringing of bells. Like the whisper of a breeze through a moonlit forest and the shimmer of the sun on the back of a toad-squirrel. Each sound is lilting and gossamer. Each sound leaves her with a sense of longing. Deep within her soul she knows what she is hearing.
She is listening to the timbre of voices long since stolen. Voices of people who have since come to pass. Voices that have, overtime, become something of nature rather than of humanity. She wonders what her own voice will sound like, what nature noise it will come to emulate if she can’t reclaim it. Or maybe it will simply remain with the spirit that had taken it, a fate iller than the other voices face.
She puts only a foot into the clearing and a dozen tiny heads turn to face her. Almost involuntarily she moves closer to Seicho. She has the decency to feel small in the presence of the spirit that assembles itself before her. Iridescent wisps rise from the flowers, the fungi, the moss, and the pool. They ebb off of the waterfall and coil down and away from strands of ivy. Each and every one coming together to form the tall, sylphlike figure of the spirit.
“It’s beautiful.” Zhang-Zin gasps.
She wishes that she could disagree, but it is. It is sublime, alluring, one of the most beautiful things that she has ever seen alongside one of the most frightening. And it is pretty in its fearsomeness. She finds herself feeling faint but she steps forward to meet it. There is a tingle on her tongue, an itch in her throat.
She wonders if she will be able to talk even if she gets her voice back, having sliced her own tongue so deeply. What if she has ruined herself beyond repair. What if she has always been ruined, broken at birth--destined for some sort of shattering.
The last wisp comes to rest at the base of the spirit’s throat shimmering a vivid golden blue. Her heart aches and her tummy flutters. She touches her fingers to her own throat.
She feels Seicho squeeze her shoulders. “Go on, Azula.” She whispers and Azula creeps away from her, parchment and brushes in hand, though she has a feeling that she won’t need them. The spirit knows what she is here for.
The smaller spirits gather around their guardian, hissing and spitting at her--slowly whittling her bravado and courage away. She has already pushed her luck so terribly far. She wonders if it would really be so bad to live a very quiet life with Seicho. Seicho who has already demonstrated that she is willing to work with and around her mutness.
She puts her brushes to the parchment and tries to work out how best to address the spirit.
She thinks that she has taken too long for its liking because she hears it, charming and chilling all at once--her own voice. Mixed amid several others it meets her ears. “You have come for your voice.” She has never felt such a ravenous longing.  She sees Mai and Zuko shift with discomfort. Seicho and Zhang-Zin don’t know just what they are hearing. And she thinks that they are lucky for it, they can stand idle and unflinchingly.  
She nods at its question.
“Why should I give it to you? What are you going to use it for?”
There are many things that come to mind. She would like to apologize to TyLee, would like to have easier discussions with Mai, would like to test how it feels to let emotion slip into her speech when she converses with Zuko. It dawns upon her that she has never really used her voice to its fullest--working only with careful and level tones and inflections. She wants to know what she can do with her voice. Yearns to know if she can do as much good with it as she had done sinister.
She thinks that these are fair answers, but the one she writes down is quite different. Put on parchment before she can stop her hand. ‘I want her to hear her name on my tongue. I want to tell her that I love her.’ Her fingers brush over the back of Seicho’s hand as she holds the parchment up.
The strand of her voice glints, she thinks that it does so with a degree of mockery. A smile splays over the spirit’s face, “I love you…” the rest of the voices fall away until it is just her own “...Seicho.”
It runs like a shiver down her spine. She feels almost sick. Somehow, Seicho smiles. And when she speaks she turns away from the spirit. She brushes Azula’s hair out of her face and replies, “I love you too.” The princess very nearly weeps, perhaps it handn’t come from her own lips but at least Seicho got to hear it. At least Seicho knows now, how delicate her words could be, what her voice sounds like. At least, in some way or another, she had gotten to tell the girl that she loved her. At least this venture won’t be completely without pay off.
She tucks the parchment away and touches her throat once again. This close to her voice, she feels a beating at its base. She holds her hand out and reaches for the golden-blue wisp. One final gesture of longing.
Seicho gently lowers her arm before she can do it herself. “It’s alright, Azula.” She smiles. “You got to say it.”
Azula nods. Faintly she thinks that she should put up more of a fight.
“That’s it, you’re just going to give up?” Zuko asks.
But he doesn’t understand; it no longer matters. The most important thing has already been said. She gives him a small smile and gently tugs on his arms. Mouthing that they should leave the spirits in peace. Leave before their patience burns away.
“Can you mouth the words?” Seicho asks.
Azula furrows her brows.
“Mouth the words, ‘I love you’.” She requests. At Azula’s nod she turns to the spirit and requests, “say it again.”
It returns with a question of its own, Azula’s voice comes back to her sounding perplexed, “do you love her.” It points at her.
Seicho slings an arm over her shoulder and nods. “Very much.” She pauses. “I want to hear her say it again.”
The spirit stoops down, low enough to be at eye level with her. Azula swallows, the tingling in her throat intensifies. Intensifies until she is met with an urge to claw at her throat to alleviate the itch. The golden blue wisp writhes on the spirit’s neck as it breaks away.
She watches it meander on the soft breeze, shimmering and flashing as it crawls over her own throat. It works its way up like a fingertip trailing up her neck until it slips between her lips. She hadn’t thought that her voice would have a taste. But it does and it is sharp like cinnamon and cool like passionfruit.
There is a beating and a pulsing at the base of her throat, an almost uncomfortable undulation. A new wisp moves to cover the one that the spirit had shed.
She can feel the vibration of her vocal cords but she can’t bring herself to make use of them yet.
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doebt · 4 years
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also what mods do u use for minecraft,, i wanna get some but idk what to do i just want more cute animals and plants and pretty things
also i use my laptop which can’t cope w too much lol
YESSS ANIMALS AND PLANTS AND PRETTY THINGS IS LIKE MY MAIN PURPOSE W MODS ok heres a list w links and brief descriptions so u kinda know whats going on <3 ill kind of categorise them too... 
some laptops seem way better than others at handling mods but i would say just pick and choose ur absolute favorites and if thats too much for it then take one out until its more manageable! my laptop handled mods very well but i dont think i had THIS many on it hadflkjghdfkjlghndklfjhg
under a readmore bc idk how long this will get LOL
animals:
ice and fire adds dragons and TONS of like fantasy animals and some scary mobs too!!! u can tame most of the animals and theyre all very unique and SUPER cool! u can ride some of them, theyll fight for u, etc... its very configurable like u can change spawn rates and stuff, i personally turned dragons WAY down so theyre very rare to come across, bc they kill u like instantly and also cause a ton of lag if theres a lot at once, and theyre default spawn rates are ummm too high lol. but yah this is one of the best mods i think ever probably...i love it sm its like a classic
better animal models makes vanilla animals look cuter and better and better animals plus (by the same ppl) adds a bunch of other animals that are rly cute! a lot of them are tameable and theyre very well thought out
genetic animals adds a bunch of dif breeds + colors and new breeding and feeding mechanics to farm animals, its kind of new but very well done but i really really love it! if you use it in conjuncture with better animal models, it replaces to vanilla farm animals but not the wolves and foxes and stuff, so they work very well together. also the chicken babies are like incredibly teeny tiny and adorable. and it lets you be able to ride llamas and cows with saddles and bridles... i could go on (this mod is what i use in place of animania, my favorite mod ever, but that one hasnt updated past 1.12)
alexs mobs also just adds a bunch of new animals, almost all of these are tameable and very unique, i LOVE that it adds crows lol you can also ride some of these animals once u tame them... u can also configure spawn rates for these if theres ones you dont want or want more of, etc. they update pretty often with new animals as well
realistic horse genetics is a super well done mod that makes horses come in wayyyyy more colors, it also has them come in different sizes and stuff...basically what it says in the name but its like. INCREDIBLY well done i couldnt live without it lol
exotic birds adds a ton of pretty birds! it also adds a rare phoenix you can obtain and tame, and ride, which is cool! you can keep birds in birdcages breed them and incubate eggs and all kinds of stuff
making stuff pretty:
biomes o plenty is super popular and really awesome, adds a tonnnn of new biomes with their own trees and wood types and plants and stuff! theres also some cool rare biomes (this mod also works well with all the animal mods); and some other biome mods i kinda cycle between are terraforged (also makes terrain generate better, smoother and stuff and super configurable! this works alongside mods that add biomes) and traverse is good too
macaws roofs, doors, windows, furniture, fences, etc are good for making ur houses pretty! i havent done much w this yet bc i havent built a house since i got it, but it looks really nice
diagonal fences does what it says on the can its suuper convenient and i like it a lot since i make a lot of animal pastures hehe... and it works with custom fences (so if you have macaws fences it will work for those too!)
fairy lights adds paper lanterns and string lights which look way better than torches! also lets u make flag banners and stuff
falling tree lets you chop a tree down in 1 swoop, and automatically destroys the floating leaves so u dont have floating trees and stuff everywhere...might seem cheaty but i like it lol (i also use this in place of dynamic trees, which makes trees BEAUTIFUL but, again, hasnt updated past 1.12)
i also use the unity resource pack (i like this one bc it makes colors more coordinated and muted! my ocd lollll i also like mizunos of courseee) and sildurs vibrant shaders (sildurs is pretty graphics intensive but the lite or medium versions are less so! there are also less intense shaders out there, this is just the one i use)... for shaders to work u need optifine (which also adds dynamic lighting! i.e torches will light the way when you hold them without placing them, stuff like that. its also just good to have, it optimises your game better to prevent lag)
SO YEAH LOL those are all the mods i use rn! some of these have dependents you have to download to make them work (like biomes o plenty requires open terrain generator) but they tell u that on the download pages and stuff, just look out for that <3 also most of these mods have wikis if you wanna know how to tame an animal or crafting recipes and stuff like that, i pretty much keep the wikis open whenever im playing lol. idk how much u know abt the like process of installing mods n stuff but if u need help hmu and ill try to help!
(sorry this is SO long btw but i wanted to be thorough and also have this in my minecraft tag in case anyone else is curious lol)
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