#for a given definition of 'fuck up'
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indelicateink · 11 months ago
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incidentally reminding me why i'm feral for amc iwtv's decision to have lestat turned in his 30s instead of 21
truth is, underneath it all, a lot of our beliefs aren't rational, and they're formed young. all those stories of magical protagonists. secret worlds if you just had the key. creatures just out of view. all that shit we imagined doesn't go away because we got older. in a lot of ways it gets bigger, more elaborately built on.
i think we're hiding the emotionally devastating core of the walrus vs fairy debate under jokes.
you see a fairy on your doorstep? and you think finally.
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dunmeshiminimumwage · 11 months ago
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back when i worked at [large chain coffee store], i tried to unionize my workplace. my manager sat me down and gave me a very guilt trip-y talk. lots of "but i thought we were a family :(" and "you don't *really* know what unionization does, do you?" i played dumb and managed to avoid being fired, but. chilchuck momence.
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gingermintpepper · 7 months ago
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Obsessed with the way Evadne's relationship with Apollo is described. Obsessed with the way Apollo was especially gentle with her because she was sheltered, hidden away and hadn't had any sort of experience with love prior to Apollo (and due to it being described as her 'first learning Aphrodite's joy' through Apollo', it was probably her first time even being attracted to someone). Obsessed with the way when she runs away, she stops in a violet patch to give birth. Y'know, violets, very famously the flower so strongly associated with Aphrodite that they were used in love potions? Those violets. Obsessed with the way that when Apollo realised his lover was going to have to deliver their child alone, he sent BOTH the goddess of childbirth and ALL THREE OF THE FATES to help and support her. Obsessed with the way that Apollo sends snakes to feed his baby honey straight from their fangs because Evadne abandons their son out of straight primal fear when her stepfather finds her and how the description of that honey is 'sweet venom' [ἰός] of the bees and is DEFINITELY a poetic pair/pun with [ἴον] aka violets and that every single thing about this relationship, conception and birth is a complete and utter fairytale down to Evadne's insanely overprotective stepfather having an immediate change of heart when he learned Evadne's child was an actual, legitimate Son of Apollo and the babe, after being cared for by his dad's honey-fanged snake buddies, was found perfectly healthy five days later swaddled in a blanket of violets (y'know the flowers so strongly associated with Aphrodite that they were used for lo-) and they called him Iamus aka Boy of the Violets which is AAAAAARRRR I AM GNAWING AT MY ENCLOSURE
Iamus was made of love. Everything about him was surrounded by deep and profound love and like, let's not even talk about his whole Thing of when he came of age and was like "I need to find out what my purpose is" and he literally had a Disney Protagonist moment where he ran out into the wilds and was like "Father!! Grandfather!! Tell me what I'm supposed to doooo!!" and then APOLLO FUCKING ANSWERED AND LED HIM TO ONE HIS TEMPLES ENTIRELY BY TALKING WITH IAMUS AND LETTING HIM FOLLOW HIS VOICE FOR THE WHOLE JOURNEY LIKE -
What do y'all know about the kind of SSS tier romantic escapades Apollo had fr?
#ginger rambles#NO BECAUSE WHAT DO Y'ALL KNOW ABOUT APOLLO AND EVADNE FR#They're a MAD underrated couple and their story is what everyone wishes Hades/Persephone was#Evadne actually WAS sheltered and overprotected because she was a daughter of Poseidon explicitly given to Aepytus to watch over#And Aepytus to his credit wasn't actually a bad man or anything he just took his job very very seriously#Super pious guy - even though he was positively incandescent when he found out Evadne was pregnant he didn't hit her or anything#He just was like “Get me my HORSE I am going to consult the GODS about my DAUGHTER'S HARLOTRY”#Evadne was fucking terrified of him though she hid that pregnancy like her life depended on it#And the minute she heard horse hooves even though she had just finished giving birth she dropped Iamus like he was molten and fucking ran#I could only imagine Aepytus having set up a baby shower or something cause he was overjoyed by the oracle and Evadne gets home thinking#she's going to get Dungeon'd only for Aepytus to hug her and be like “You should've told me you were seeing Apollo sob emoji sob emoji”#God I'm sure Evadne had a bunch of trauma to work through with her stepfather changing his whole entire attitude on a complete#Apollo doesn't directly interfere with their lives after Iamus is born up until Iamus comes looking for him but he was definitely keeping#a very close eye on them all through their lives#Ugh I'm sick I'm so sick in the head thinking about them#apollo#evadne#iamus#greek mythology#ginger chats about greek myths
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hii-raeth · 2 months ago
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Does anyone else ever get sad about the 'Kakashi was a bad teacher!' argument because sandaime put an unwilling, unexperienced, depressed & traumatized 26 year old in charge of equally traumatized kids + sakura with zero support or training and expected that to just... be okay? Somehow?
Two of the kids were probably direct reminders of his traumas
All of the kids needed specialized care and instruction to flourish
so of course Kakashi wasn't great at it. He never got the setup to be a good teacher. Teaching is a skill that requires training and support and he never got either. He was just given three 12-year olds in a world that frequently kills 12-year olds and was told not to fuck it up
But he still managed to foster an atmosphere of trust, safety and affection, which was exactly what they needed
Which given the circumstances was probably the best anyone could do
Or is that just me?
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catgirljaneway · 1 year ago
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if there's one thing Kathryn Janeway is gonna do, it's look at her employees like the 🥺🥺 emoji
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jerreeeeeee · 5 months ago
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as much as i enjoy the more wholesome fantasy high parents like jawbone and sklonda and the thistlesprings there’s something so compelling and achingly real about bill seacaster that makes him my favorite. he and fabian have a relationship that is so deeply unhealthy and entrenched in distorted ways of viewing other people and parenthood and the world, and yet is so fiercely and undeniably loving. like, is bill seacaster a good dad? what does being a good dad even mean for someone like bill? bill seacaster has such unrealistic and toxic expectations of fabian and a myopic, entirely self-centered way of relating to him for most of his life, and yet, you truly get the sense that even if fabian disappoints him again and again and never steps out of his shadow and never becomes the man bill wants him to be, bill will never love him any less than completely and unconditionally. bill seacaster is a man who has built his entire life and sense of identity around doing whatever he wants and never facing consequences and never thinking about anyone else. bill seacaster becomes disappointed in his son. and he finds the idea of that so unacceptable that, instead of demanding that fabian meet his expectations, bill loves him so much that he reconsiders his entire concept of himself and the purpose of his life, and he grows. a man whose legacy and identity was based around selfishness and narcissism and unwillingness to bend, and fabian makes him change.
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twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat · 3 months ago
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and if i said suguru’s relationship with weakness (’the preciousness of the weak, the ugliness of the weak’) was born out of his feelings towards his mother …
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cornertheculprit · 19 days ago
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thinking about what apollo and nahyuta's relationship would be like immediately post-aa6 is funny because yes they haven't seen each other in over a decade and when they did finally meet again nahyuta was acting like a total dick but. while i think things would be awkward (sometimes extremely so) at first, i don't think there would be any, like, coldness to the distance between them. maybe there would've been if they didn't find out dhurke was dead together and then also got held at gunpoint (during which apollo kept trying to run his mouth until nahyuta in particular begged him to stop) but considering All Of That Happened.....i think there would be a sort of frankness between them. like yeah they still have to tackle the whole "apart for over a decade" thing but unsurprisingly it's a lot easier to do so when the absolute terror of potentially losing each other, so soon after dhurke's death, is recent enough to still be breathing down their necks
#i've been looking around and looking at people's different interpretations of how it would go#and i've seen both ends of the spectrum i.e. 'they act like they never left each other immediately' vs.#'they are constantly at each other's throats' and i don't think either of those are really....right. at least in my opinion.#i think Everything That Happened would inspire a sort of frankness between them that isn't really shared by anyone else. which makes sense#given that despite so many years apart they were still raised together from the time they were babies. apollo was a year old or less#when dhurke pulled him from the fire and nahyuta is older than him by a year or slightly less. even when they were apart there was never#a time where they weren't aware of the other's existence because absence is a reminder in and of itself#so. frankness. and a combination of starting anew and picking up where they left off during their first separation in their own way#they are not the same kids that they were then and that's obvious to everyone and ESPECIALLY them. But.#fear is a powerful motivator. and that same fear that turned apollo into a stuttering mess when ga'ran threatened nahyuta and#led nahyuta to literally beg apollo to shut the fuck up lest he be shot in front of him is‚ i think‚ what would enable them to push through#all that initial awkwardness. aa has never been about perfect family relationships but it HAS always been about love. and the love is there#as little as i think of the writing in the game...the love was definitely there. it persists so they persist. so it goes
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group-dynamic · 4 months ago
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Elrond, to Cirdan: "What is beauty when it is born in part of evil?"
Cirdan: "No less beautiful." * *After which he immediately turns behind him with a knowing look to Elrond until the camera adjusts focus onto him
. . .
Also Adar to Elrond "You have the beauty of your fore-mother Melian of the Valar"
Me: Shaking crying gnashing teeth; Ohh OKay!!
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beanghostprincess · 11 months ago
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*holds you by shoulders*
WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE THING ABOUT 1082 I WAS SURE IT WAS SHIPPY THING AND NOW I NEED TO KNOW
*starts sobbing while slowly falling to my knees*
…….please
I SAW THIS YESTERDAY NIGHT WHEN I WAS ABOUT TO FALL ASLEEP AND I JUST WOKE UP EARLY TO REPLY BECAUSE I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR AGES FOR THIS QUESTION I AM GOING TO KISS YOU ANON-
I do love and adore the shippy part of 1082 because I am a very intense Shuggy shipper and I had been waiting to read their break-up for sooo long. But it's not exactly what made the chapter life-changing for me, tbh.
Buggy's speech is... Is incredibly beautiful and encouraging. It explains so much about his character, the dynamic he has with Cross Guild, and why he's so resentful toward Shanks. Throughout the manga, we've seen him in serious moments, yes, but usually, Buggy is pretty much used for comedy relief more than anything. This is one of the first times we've seen Buggy realize the position he has now and say "Fuck it. Already on the verge of dead for these two, might as well do something with this shitty situation because for once, I have the opportunity to be brave and be more than what people think of me". There's literally nothing stopping him right now, and he prefers to risk his life enraging Crocodile and Mihawk than letting this opportunity of showing who he truly is slide.
And tbh, we haven't seen them ever since (I am starving please-) but I am really hopeful his speech somehow makes Crocodile and Mihawk have a little tiny itty bitty of respect for him at least. Because out of the three? Buggy is the one who deserves the title of pirate more.
Mihawk and Crocodile don't have dreams or ambitions and see pirating as a business. Even when Crocodile did have ambitions (remember when the silly rubber guy destroyed all of his dreams that was a funny arc haha) his whole personality has always been more of a mafioso than anything. Mihawk is a simple man and is bored with life being at the top of the top, he clearly wants something interesting to happen but doesn't see any use in looking for it himself. They care about their commodities and wealth. But out of the three, Buggy is the one who had to give up on his dream and now he has the opportunity to fulfill it.
"How can you call yourselves pirates with schemes like that?! You're doing it all backwards!! [...] Way back when... What did you guys want to be?! [...] I wanna be king of the pirates!! Wealth? Power? Why stop there when we can have it all?!"
This is something a real pirate would say. He talks like Roger here, I am going to curl up and cry don't look at me-
What I like about One Piece is the constant use of themes like dreams and freedom etc, etc... That's something we all know. But you wouldn't expect it coming from Buggy, of all people. And I think I'm pretty fond of him being brave and finally acting upon what he truly wants to do. What makes it great is that you have this comedy relief character standing up for his dream in front of clearly two other antagonists that have control over him in, well, strength and everything. But Buggy has something they don't and it's so, so much ambition and a dream that could be considered childish but it's the representation of freedom and doing things because you want to follow your heart. This is kind of why I always say Luffy would be more fond of Buggy if he knew the whole story and would probably support him a lot--
What I like the most about this chapter is both Buggy's character development through a speech + flashback and Mihawk and Crocodile being completely stunned by it because they weren't expecting this to happen from Buggy of all people. I know I sound like a broken record but I really, really, want them to respect Buggy a little bit more after this. Also, Buggy doesn't do this only to announce he's going to follow his dream now that he's on equal footing with Shanks. He does it because the other two mention needing overwhelming power over the rest. Buggy isn't stupid and knows how manipulating people works. The thing that makes pirates work harder isn't money, it's a dream. And there's nothing a pirate desires more than the One Piece, so that's kind of why he announces it publicly. First, to establish power, and second, so that way Mihawk and Crocodile don't get rid of him because seriously, Buggy is a better boss than these two because their followers appreciate him and don't feel forced to follow him.
Not to mention that the whole thing also shows more of Buggy's relationship with Roger and how left out he felt because people thought highly of Shanks instead of him. But Buggy, even if he was jealous, was willing to follow Shanks despite his feelings because he accepted being less worthy of respect than him. Shanks shone brightly and Buggy decided that, even if he wanted to be seen like that too, he'd give up on his dream and support Shanks instead because at least they'd do this together, just the way they did everything back at the time.
But then Shanks hesitates, and I think that's Buggy's last straw because he sees giving up going for the One Piece as something disrespectful to their captain (dad) and thinks it's unfair that Shanks is so respected by everyone even though the one wanting to follow their captain's steps right away is him. It's honestly frustrating. And then you understand better why Buggy is angry at Shanks-- Yeah, he made him eat the devil fruit and lost the map because of him (not really but whatever), but the way I see it that's just a metaphor for the real reason why Buggy is so resentful. Shanks' existence, even if it was not on purpose, made Buggy feel so powerless he gave up on his dream. And eating a devil fruit means the sea hates you and you can't have any independence in the pirate world, and losing the map is kind of like losing the only thing that guides you. He left Buggy with nothing and let him carry the burden of a lost dream.
This is funny because Shanks did absolutely nothing wrong and everything is a product of jealousy and miscommunication, but I understand why Buggy blames Shanks and this chapter makes it clearer and explains it perfectly.
Basically, it's such an amazing chapter for Buggy's character and it's definitely my favorite for him specifically. Although the flashback does wonders for my Shuggy heart.
Also, adding more points for the revolutionary plot in the end and Sabo showing up because I adore him <3
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grandwretch · 4 months ago
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one of the many reasons I love Rachel's POV is that she just does not get Marco. Not at all. Jake and Tobias know hes putting up a front more often than not, and Cassie especially sees right through him, but Rachel buys the mask. She even thinks, originally, that Marco might be against fighting just to annoy them. I'm not even sure that Rachel ever really understands how deep Marco goes down the rabbit hole.
Like, I don't think she's doing anything that Marco doesn't want her to-- She isn't being mean or anything. I don't think it's because she dislikes him, or because they're constantly fighting. Marco is doing this on purpose. He puts on a mask with everyone, but Rachel, especially, and she buys it hook, line, and sinker.
And it really makes you think, like-- How long did Marco and Rachel know each other before his mom died? Is she basing her assumptions off a boy that doesn't exist anymore? Is that why Marco keeps up the front with her, or is it because she's the most popular, the prettiest, and the strongest? Did Marco have a crush on Rachel before his entire world fell apart? Is that why he's desperate for her to never realize it did?
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butwhatifidothis · 6 months ago
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Harassment is horrible, it's terrible mods in this Discord aren't doing anything.
But on the other hand, what about you? You harassed a person over *fanfiction* ( to the point it's the 4th tag who shows up on your blog ). Yet, all your harassment is still there out of the open. You haven't really seriously apologized, especially to them. You're still quite active on fe3h discourse while he had to remove himself from many public online space.
How is this fair?
You're rightfully upset about harassment towards members of your community, there should be *serious* amends made... But how can you hold double standards like that?
I haven't followed the discourse closely because it's so awful, why are you all so hateful? Because you just seems like one of the "bad guy" in this story along with Raxis and the other. I'm not saying you're the same, but you're not really better than those you criticize either, and the same apply for the other blog who participed in your harassment... It's just horrible all around. You're all drowning in a cesspool of toxicity and it's making you all worst people than you actually are.
I hope you, and people around you, will at least receive amend over the harm caused to them. I hope you stop receiving troll, death threat and any other type of hate message you probably still receive. But I hope you'll sincerely recognize your faults and fully amend to them too.
Look, I know you probably mean some kind of well and that you likely spent a long time thinking over this message, so I'm going to lay it out as simply as I can:
I have never once interacted with Cap'n himself, and I have repeatedly told anyone reading my posts to do the same. This is unlike the people who have harassed me and others, who went out of their way to make sure we saw what they were saying about us. This includes publicly admitting to using alts to go around our blocks of them so that they can keep interacting with us directly
Very quickly into critiquing Cap'n's work, a primary focus became pointing out the problematic rhetoric he was spreading with his incredibly influential, incredibly popular fanfic. This includes the justification of holding racist rhetoric, the anti-miscegenation rhetoric, the infantilization of women, the demonization of men, the justification of imperialism, and more, all which appear very quickly into the story and stay prominent throughout the story. The people who have harassed me and others, meanwhile, either deny this rhetoric exists in their circles or outright hold this rhetoric themselves. This includes the use and defense of genocide apologetics.
This post is the first time I have talked about Cap'n in over a year, and the last time I posted any notes on his fic was over a year and a half ago. This is unlike the people who have harassed me and others, who have engaged in harassing behaviors as recently as this week (as of Aug 18 2024).
It has been explicitly said by those close to Cap'n that my notes, while upsetting him, had no part in him leaning away from social media more, unlike what you say here. This is unlike the people who have harassed me and others, who have driven off multiple people from social media and have openly patted themselves on the back for doing so, justifying their harassment by saying the people they've harassed off social media deserved it.
I have kept my critiques strictly on this Tumblr, as have most of the people who have talked about Cap'n's fic. This is unlike the people who have harassed me and others, who have spread their harassment on places such as Twitter, Reddit, and TVTropes.
I have refrained from ever accusing Cap'n of ever holding any bigoted views himself, and have made it a repeated point to say that his problematic writing is far more likely due to ignorance of the subjects involved rather than outright malice. This is unlike the people who have harassed me and others, who have accused many of us as people of being sexist, racist, homophobic, etc. based off of nothing. This includes accusing at least one of us of actual crimes against actual people with no proof and on multiple sites such as the popular and public Edelgard Discord and on Reddit.
People who said they were in contact with Cap'n (as in, mods of the Discord server that Cap'n was once in, the same server that has the mod that uses genocide apologetics) have been told that I was willing to remove parts of my notes that he found too attacking or harsh, and they've been told that I would outright remove all of my posts regarding Cap'n period if he would talk to me directly and we could discuss the implications and rhetoric he had accidentally written into his story. While I do understand him not wanting to do the latter (as it involves directly talking to me), he hadn't even done the former (which does not involve directly talking to me and only involves relaying messages through his friends). And with all of the above on top of that, it gives me the impression that he feels less like "this person is harassing me and that is giving my anxiety" and more "this person is critiquing me and I don't like that." While he has every right to feel the latter, we aren't going to sit here and say that's the same as the former.
So, nonnie, to answer why I am "hateful," as you put it: I don't like stories that unironically say being two races mean you don't belong to either race being influential in a fandom, as a mixed-race woman. I don't like stories that have characters of color only be used as props for the author's favorite little white girl to be influential in fandom, as a person of color. I don't like stories saying that women just want to go back to being innocent pure little girls and not be the wilted tainted flowers they are now to be influential in a fandom, as a woman. I don't like stories that lay the blame of all the world's suffering on the shoulders of a race of people who've barely survived a genocide to be influential in a fandom, as a person with a modicum of knowledge on where that rhetoric inevitably leads to. I don't like stories saying that men who don't bow down to women will almost certainly become rapist pigs or otherwise terrorizing monsters to be influential in a fandom, as someone who rejects sexism of all forms. I don't like stories that liken the violent conquests of imperialism to the blooming of flowers, or that say that imperialism is the only way for the "good" culture to help everyone - actual, genuine rhetoric used to justify actual, genuine imperialism - to be influential in a fandom, as someone who has read any history book ever.
And I don't like how all of this and more have clearly been normalized in big 3H fandom circles and how this has led to multiple people getting harassed, in no small part due to Cap'n's influence on the fandom at large.
I'm sorry if Cap'n doesn't like me pointing out the bigotry he had engraved throughout his story, and I'm sorry if I'm not going to be convinced that me doing that is the same as people's deliberate and long-standing attempts to chase people out of the fandom for saying they don't like Edelgard in the one way they allow anyone to like her, and I'm sorry that me calling out the racism people are engaging in and are hiding behind the shield of "discourse" seems to bother you so much, but I think I've explained why I'm not exactly that sorry well enough. Hope this answers your question <3
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jessamine-rose · 5 months ago
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*lovingly tackles Aine*
Read my Yandere! Pierro longfics first ♪( ´▽`)
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Last week, my beloved mutual @ainescribe surprised me with Savior! Darling fan art and AHAI9232@2-!/! CRYING SCREAMING I WANT TO LOOK AT THIS ART AND WORSHIP YOUR VERSION OF SAVIOR THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BLESSING ME WITH YOUR ART—
*clears throat* Anyway, now that I finally have the time to properly sit down and comment on the fan art, I’ll do just that. Feedback will be in the tags and it will be unhinged. Once again, thank you so much to Aine for drawing this <3
#feedback#fan art#pranabefall#AIIINE ;-; once again. thank you so much!! it rlly means a lot to me that you enjoyed my writing and felt inspired to draw this :'>#and as someone who loves fashion and character design. it's so so interesting to analyze your version of savior#there's so much symbolism and visual storytelling in each sketch/ outfit and i shall now proceed to pick apart each detail as best as i can#her snezhnayan fit.....god i love it. it's regal. distinctively snezhnayan. and draws attention to her--and you just know that was pierro's#intention when he dressed her in those garments. IT'S JUST SO...!! savior's wardrobe scrubbed clean of her original culture and preferences#replaced with the foreign garments of her captor's nations.....in line with this. i love how her kokoshnik and khaenri'ahn earrings are big#and attention-grabbing. you can't look at her without taking note of those accessories. it begs the question:: how many times has savior#looked at the mirror after being dressed up in snezhnaya and was unable to recognize her own reflection?? :'>#also shoutout to some details aine shared with me: 1) the face marks are inspired by weeping angels 2) the kokoshnik was traditionally worn#by married noblewomen BUT the veil was normally for unmarried women so savior's outfit can be seen as a form of compliance + rebellion#(though later on in history it became accepted for married women to also wear that veil. also my apologies if what i said is inaccurate)#lastly shoutout to savior's expression!! very poised and mysterious....due to her emotional state or pierro's rules on how to act as his#spouse in public?? we'll never know~ the first drawing hits even harder when you compare it to the next one!! such an interesting contrast~#savior in her plain attire. casual and domestic with a smile on her face....i'm guessing this is her pre-fatui version?? she looks so warm#and friendly. and i can definitely understand why pierro fell for her smile <3#also i fucking love the caption. sorry pierro but you are cursed to be a loser/ simp/ pathetic man in all of my fics and AUs xD#NOW ONTO GODDESS! SAVIOR AAAHHHH!! i love the greek goddess motifs. she looks so regal and awe-inspiring but in a different way from her#snezhnayan attire--archaic. divine. and more suited to her personal style.....yet both versions of her look so painfully isolated :'>#her blank eyes. emotionless face. and veil give me the vibes of a spooky victorian ghost...or would a statue/ portrait be more fitting??#the lack of a necklace is also an interesting design choice given what happens in the fic. and now i realized i forgot to comment on your#version of her snezhnayan necklace oops. similar to the kokoshnik and earrings. the size + grandeur makes it impossible to ignore#that and big jewels = expensive af. ohhh and i love the sparkles on her veil!! pierro rlly spared no expense in dressing up his wifey <3#it's also funny how all of these outfits are similar to my own version in terms of 'savior wore grand clothing during her glory days as a#goddess -> wore simple attire after her decline for practicality and to blend in with humans/ disassociate from her old identity -> is now#dressed in even grander clothing as the harbinger's spouse. but it's used to reinforce her new identity and pierro's control over her'#tldr:: your design is so creative and i can see the effort you put in analyzing her character and depicting her based on your interpretatio#thank you for being my mutual + reader and i hope we can share even more harbinger/darling brainrot in the future :>
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racke7 · 13 days ago
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It kind of occurred to me today that this:
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is kind of... awkward.
See, as anyone with chronic-pain will tell you, your "daily activities" will warp around your pain.
Where instead of doing things "the normal way" you've figured out some kind of mostly-painless workaround, and so you don't even have to worry about it.
And then it's also difficult to say what amounts to "most" or "many" or "some". Is there a set list of things you need to be able to do? In today's world, plenty of people go from bed to computer to bed, never even needing to leave their apartment. How does that translate?
Not to mention what "all the time" really means. Does it only care about the worst days if you have something that flares up? Does it only care if it hurts even when you stop an activity?
And how come "talking / listening" is so high up? What if your brain decides to go non-verbal from just paper-cuts? What would be the appropriate "loss of function"-comparison in that case?
Basically? There's a lot of empty holes and abstractness muddling everything, even in this seemingly incredibly useful example.
I remember someone saying "your worst day - with no meds/tools", but what if that worst day only happens a few times a year?
It's complicated, is what I'm saying. And whilst this description is definitely useful, I wouldn't take it as gospel.
In fact, you might be better off ignoring your doctor when they start asking about "numbers" and just explain how the pain effects you.
"On a scale of 1-10" "I'll wake up in the middle of the night, nearly unable to move from the pain, and then desperately claw my way out of my bed. I'll then spend around two hours sitting up and letting my body recover, before being so tired that it outweighs the pain, and I can crawl back into bed for another few hours of sleep. At which point I'll wake up in pain again. During the day, I struggle to turn around or bend over."
They might not like this, and they might interpret the "number" in their own ways (which might screw you over), but at that point it's more about them being shit than you failing to describe things.
Obviously though, I'm not a medical professional and shouldn't be giving medical-advice. I'm just saying that 1-10 is so fucking arbitrary that I don't feel like you can give the "correct" answer, no matter how much thought you put into it.
#these musings are brought to you by - my ribs. which are definitely a contender for not letting me sleep at night#like. me trying to ''even things out'' by making sure i don't lean towards my mouse-arm when sitting down#is probably working? there've been more times of me being able to stand back up without being in pain lately#but it almost seems like it's getting worse in my sleep now? bcs it'll wake me up and try to kill me if i roll over#but it'll also hurt if i don't roll over. and it's genuinely getting hard to tell if it's my spine or my ribs that are the worst#(probably my ribs. bcs the current medicine for my spine... seems to at least work to ''cure'' the pain when it pops up)#(as in. i'll wake up in pain after four hours of sleep. i take the pill. i wait for twenty-minutes. i go back to bed and continue sleeping)#(if this was the first medicine i'd been given? i would've called it a fucking miracle. as it is? i'm not entirely happy with it)#this is obviously not made better bcs any attempts to lean AWAY from my mouse-arm? now my OTHER side starts to make noise#not a LOT of noise. yet. but enough that i'm definitely not feeling comfortable trying to solve it that way.#having said that. part of why it might feel worse these last few days is the physiotherapy.#it's not fun. i grit my teeth in pain during it more than i probably should. and i think it might make my muscles sore too#so there's ''pain + pain + exercise-pain'' and it's... not a great time.#even if i know that it's probably good for me in the long-term.#personal stuff#health
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cicada-candy · 15 days ago
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I get the sense that Nina is gonna haunt the next season.
#creature commandos#discussion in tags ->#im having A Moment#bride crashout incoming question mark.#i would Love To See her go after flag but its not gonna happen lol#i mean i guess she already kinda did. killing Rostovic. but like. i want her to lose it#bride says shes the only kind one out of them. she finally accepts that theyre friends and then accidentally drives her to her to her death#i want nina to have been a Uniting Force of the team. i want everything to go to shit w/o her there#a character whose Whole Life is defined by being a perceived burden to others is finally almost able to prove herself and.#i want the bride to go absolutely postal i want phosphorus to try changing for the better. asterisk. sorta. hear me out#the bride is just about nihilistic atp. she straight up says if rostovic hadnt killed nina she wouldnt have cared enough.#she deserved to have a sparkling fiery vengeful meltdown about everything next season. and she should get to kill eric godspeed.#phosphorus has already gotten his revenge.#he went through terrible shit and killed everyone who wronged him and then went on a hedonistic bender about it.#(phosphorus is also the only one to go by a different name. and he chose it for himself. i dont have anythng to say abt that yet but. ow)#but he clearly is still wracked with guilt about his wife and kids deaths too. He goes for Thorne at home. He definitely kills his kids.#in what i can only see as an intentional parallel.#but then in pokolistan when he is given a Very Legitimate reason to kill the little girl [she could out the team] not only does he Not-#he talks to and plays with her in a way that is Immediately a parallel to his own kid owwwww#[for hours possibly? isnt it night when theyre being chased and morning when her parents come down?? ill have 2 check tho]#good god im off topic anyway#phosphorus is a sarcastic prick like. comedically so.#the aformentioned scene is pretty much the only time in the whole show hes even remotely sincere#when him and the bride are trying to reassure nina before she goes to kill the princess-#he A] sounds genuinely earnest B] calls her “kid” and C] waits for her to leave before ruining it lmao#and like. i dont know if he felt paternal or anything but i do think her death is gonna mess him up a little#or maybe theyll all get worse.. i wouldnt be annoyed if they all crash the fuck out together. GI is gonna find out eventually too.#also hes reformed. kinda. in some of his recent comic appearances which makes for a fun dynamic certainly#christ this was a novel im sorry hsajdghkgdah#i dont rly have a satisfying ending i just. Ouagh
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Me talking to a job coach who is also an autism specialist but can't diagnose me due to the setting.
Me: so I got a 37 on the AQ, a 199 on the RAADS-r, a 23 on the EQ, a 157 on the CAT-Q, a 67 on the SQ-r and a 55 on the RBQ-2a. And the aspie quiz you gave me said I am 100% likely to be neurodivergent.
Job coach: well, none of that is surprising to me. It's all above average
Me: that's a good thing right?
Job coach: it is if you're wanting to get diagnosed with Autism.
Me: ...huh-
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