#floch headcanon

[jeanbie]

Omg hi I don’t know if you take nsfw requests but I was wondering about aot’s favorite positions🥺 your writing is so so good!!

honestly.....i thought this was hard !!! i can't see any of them being overly picky on positions or even having all time favs; over the eras of aot, they all change so much it's actually hard to say...so i tried my best to think semi-objectively :3 absolutely feel free to disagree with ANY of these, everyone has diff interpretations (and i love all of em)

warnings: fem!reader (sorry), sexual content ofc, if u want the girl vers lemme know :D

AOT BOYS & FAV POSITIONS ★ masterlist.

MISSIONARY

“you look so fucking pretty right now—” is the only thing they can think of saying as they bow their chest over yours, watching your face twist as their cock sinks deeper into your cunt. one of your legs is wrapped firmly around their waist or hanging up over their shoulder; this way, they can watch you writhe and whimper whilst also watching the way you suck them up nicely, the way your body tenses and flinches with every thrust they give...

— jean, zeke, niccolo

RIDING

there is no greater joy than leaning back and watching you do your thing. their hands are on your waist, smoothing around your hips and stomach in an effort to distract themselves from simply filling you up and going wild — they love to watch you sinking down on them, your back arched and breasts rising with every rise and fall. they meet your hips by raising their own, finding pleasure in watching your face pull into contorted shapes, hearing the moans and whimpers from your mouth. from down here, they like the control they can have, and on occasion, the submission of doing whatever you tell them to

— levi, armin, porco

BENT OVER

if they can bend you over it, they can fuck you on it. tables, beds, tree trunks, fences, desks, sinks — it’s like they’re trying to fuck you on every possible or available surface they can find. they just love to see the sight of your ass tilted up, hips pressing into a hard surface, legs spread in a desperate attempt to stay upright, all while they drive themselves into you however fast or hard they want to. they can be as gentle or as rough as they want to be; running their hands up your back and between your shoulder blades, or smacking your ass and pulling your hair — everything about fucking you from behind is perfect for them, and by the sounds of things, perfect for you

— eren, floch

[bonus] s4!eren loves to fuck you over a sink or a vanity, anywhere he can pull you back by your hair and make you watch in the mirror. his eyes never leave yours through the glass, his lips whispering the dirtiest things he can possibly think of just to get you to cum around him, to watch yourself unravel in his hands

RIDING THEIR FACE

they are a seat. that’s all they are, all they ever want to be — a seat for their perfect partner. they could spend hours with their tongue up your cunt, hands pressed into your ass or hips as you ride the features on their face. they would happily die of suffocation down here, just as long as you were happy and they got to taste their favourite thing in the world

— connie, onyankopon

GIVING THEM A BLOWJOB

every position is good with their partner, but absolutely nothing beats you on your knees between their legs, their cock in your mouth. a hand in your hair, on your cheek or the back of your neck, they love to watch you take care of them, especially after a particularly long and otherwise bad day. whether it’s simply between their legs as they sit, or as they lie down before bed — or under a desk when there are other people around, nothing will ever top the feeling of your mouth running itself up their dick, or how warm and wet it feels as you take them. 

— ERWIN, bertolt

REVERSE COWGIRL

“comfy, darlin?” with their hands on your hips, they love to help you sink down onto them, using your hips as handles to bring you up and down at whatever pace they fancy. they just love the sight of your face turning back to him with a pleasured look, the muscles in your back tensing whenever he hits that perfect spot up your pussy. seeing you looking like this makes him feel so proud — you’re taking him like its no problem, your ass bouncing on his stomach, toes curling as you set your hands on his legs for balance. he’ll let you take control until you tire, and then the fun can really begin

— reiner, kenny (help)

[exosalt]

aot headcanons - skincare edition

Armin

Slightly on the dry side but v sensitive

Has a pretty simple routine - cleanser, toner, moisturiser, aftershave etc

His products are high end and high quality

Knows exactly what to use for specific skin issues

Religiously uses SPF

Eren

Combination skin but slightly on the oilier side

Doesn’t have a skincare routine

Uses 3-in-1 shampoo/conditioner/body wash on his face when he’s in the shower

Steals Armin’s and Mikasa’s skincare products

Uses them wrong

Refuses to use SPF in winter

Mikasa

Normal balanced skin

Literally only needs cleanser and SPF and that’s IT

Likes trying out new face masks and sheet masks

Physically has to hold Eren down and rub SPF on his face

Levi

Used to have balanced skin like Mikasa but it dried out because he kept using hand sanitizer on his face

Cleanses twice a day but with antibacterial soap

Skin stills looks good because ✨Ackergenes✨

Jean

Combination and slightly acne-prone

Needs encouragement to use proper skincare

Not too fussed about following a proper routine, always forgets in the evening

Thinks growing a beard will cover the sins

Sasha

Has an oily T-zone

Tiktok is her main source of skincare info

Tried homemade Pinterest face masks but ended up eating it

Has a post on her Instagram of herself and Connie with face masks on and cucumbers over their eyes

Connie

Combination skin but slightly acne prone

Doesn’t really use anything special unless it’s recommended to him

“What’s your skincare routine?” “Water” - thinks that’s a flex

Loves trying new face masks with Sasha

Historia

Dry, sensitive skin but no one can ever tell because she’s perfected her skincare

Has a full 12 step routine

Loves giving skincare recommendations

Convinces Ymir to do spa nights with her

Reiner

Tears

LMAO jk jk his skincare is pretty simple

Has mostly normal skin but stress causes him to break out

Still trying to find products which work for him

Bertholdt

Oily + sensitive skin

Constantly forgets to use SPF

Doesn’t really matter because he sweats off all the product anyway

Annie

Combination skin

Constant dark circles

Uses super simple drugstore products

Only really focused on keeping her skin clean

Started using SPF because Armin suggested it

Marco

Combination skin but has an oily forehead

Doesn’t have a proper routine

Only buys products that are half off 🙃

Low-key scared he’ll exfoliate a freckle off

(The freckles demand love)

Ymir

Really only uses water and it works out fine

Doesn’t understand the skincare hype

Will still try out whatever Historia recommends for her

Erwin

this set

Hange

Doesn’t have a skincare routine

Likes putting weird things on their face just to see what effect they’ll have

Like they’ll rub a whole lemon on their face just to see what it does

Enjoys popping pimples

Miche

Soap goes up his nose every single day and impairs his sense of smell for like an hour afterwards

Cries when this happens

Prefers to keep it simple

Floch

Doesn’t wash his face

Crusty ass bitch

s/o to @sehun-cakes for helping me with this 😂

[magicxc]

Headcannons

Rain Down On Me - Where they like to cum. 02/10/24

Warnings: lots of cum

Pretzel Shapes - Their fave position. 02/11/24

Warnings: tiny bit o smut

Toxic Traits - Tha bois being toxic. 02/16/24

Warnings: none

Drunk In Love- How they are when drunk. 02/17/24

Warnings: none

Aunt Flo - Their reactions to periods. 02/17/24

Warnings: blood? none fr

Stork Visits - Are tha bois interested in expanding their families? 02/24/24

Warnings: possible baby fever

Pillow Talk - Things they say in bed. 02/25/24

Warnings: some smut here, some smut there

Kinks - What gets them ticking. 03/02/24

Warnings: horny thots

Safe Word - How they react to the safe word being used. 03/09/24

Warnings: none

Sizes - Do they hang low? 03/10/24

Warnings: none

Safe Word Ignored - How they react to the safe word being used. 03/17/24

Warnings: DUB CON, NON CON

Movies - their fave movie genre. 03/31/24

Warnings: possible impulsive buying of streaming subscriptions

Holidays - their fave holidays. 03/31/24

Warnings: none

Square Up - things they do that annoy you. 05/25/24

Warnings: none

Frenemies - people that they cannot STAND. 05/26/24

Warnings: none

[queenbeehistoria]

WHAT'S UP THEN? — aot boys fighting

EREN: - y'all seen the way he did armin... - he should be working at popeyes the way he constantly give niggas four piece combos - he 100% got a pair of black air forces at home - please don't fall because you are NOT getting back up - don't win either because he IS spinning back, and i'm not talking about ballet

ARMIN: - he def pulls hair - HAIR PULL + UPPERCUT IS HIS MOVE - fights wild like a girl but has the fucking strength of a man - he will have you on the ground real quick - he hits first most def - one of those people that be like "WHAT'S GOOD, BITCH/HOE" when he squares up - windmills when times get rough JEAN: - he acts hella aggressive - "I'LL WHOOP YOUR ASS" *spends three hours taking off every piece of clothing* - jean can throw hands , he just afraid to get his ass beat - the only time you can this man to throw hands is if you talk about his friends or his momma - jean will have you in the hospital bout his momma CONNIE: - "WHAT'S GOOD?" "WHAT'S UP THEN?" "THEN SWINGGGGG!" - he's the dude that does walk + pants pull up when he's about to fight. - he a dodger for sure - that little duck + step back his signature fr. - and my man be putting in work too - connie got sasha & jean on the side. jean if they jump. sasha if somebody gf jump in, but sasha will jump in regardless of gender - people try to beat his ass bc he one of the ppl that play too much - he don't play about his family or sasha. that's the easiest way to end up in a emergency room. - makes sound effects when he swings

REINER: - another stripper - by the time he gets done taking off his clothes, you don't even want to fight him anymore - he cocky with it too - this man gets one good hit, "OH YEAH, YOU DON'T LIKE THAT. I EATS THOSE" and then gets dropped immediately - reiner the dude that talks hella shit before the fight. like so much shit, you think he gon win. and then he gets knocked tf out in like five hits

BERTHOLDT: - the only reason people be trying to fight him is because he tall as fuck - he got no idea what the fuck he doing - bert just swinging his arms and kicking his legs - some of hits land - he confused as to why he's fighting but he's not getting his ass beat - he got the spirit & he's trying 😭

LEVI: - he stomps people out - not even an army can get that man shoe off you - levi the type to leave they victim with brain damage - curb stomp depending on how mad you made him - you finna be walking around with permanent shoe prints on your body MARCO: - he's pepper spraying your ass AND he's calling the police - that man do not get down like that - jean is on speed-dial, and the man is on his way ERWIN: - "hello, 911? yes, there are a couple of delinquents in my front yard. they are telling me to come outside." - cops getting called real quick - he will not hesitate to put a bitch in a chokehold - you'll be pinned to the ground with the quickness. he get down, he don't play

FLOCH: - this nigga CANNOT FIGHT - he the person you gotta yell "GET UP, TWIN!" - floch try to fight like eren, but he gets reminded that he isn't eren everytime this nigga gets dropped - they be sweeping the floor with this man - he get like two hits in max. - definition of fuck around and find out NICCOLO: - niccolo got hands that will put you in the hospital & him in jail - he tries to avoid fights and just talk it out - he doesn't fight until sasha gets mentioned. now jean gotta hold him back. - niccolo one of them people where the fight turns from "HE BEATING HIS ASS 🗣🗣" to "damn, he's beating his ass... 😟" - this man is crazy as fuck when he fights - like eren, please do not fall because you are not getting back up - it takes hella people to pull him off - they get jean because he's the only one (besides from sash) that pull his buff ass back.

[slxtslovebambi]

Stalker analysis.

Characters: Eren and Floch <3

Synopsis: what kind of stalkers/yandere they would be.

Warnings: the titel says it all

Wc: 900+

Eren

Eren knows you since Highschool.

You were close with Mikasa and Annie and since he’s friends with Mikasa he quickly gains a lot of knowledge about you.

He’s the anti social type of stalker for sure. He has friends yes but only a few close ones and he’s not interested in making new ones.

He’d be the type to constantly call night and day, just to hang up on you before you even have the opportunity to pick up.

Eren always had trouble with controlling his emotions, what makes him so unpredictable. One moment he obsesses over you, thinking his life doesn’t have any meaning without you being around, and the next moment he wants to break you, take everything from you and make you live a miserable life, for simple things like talking to another guy, or throwing away the flowers he sent you.

Eren would send you a lot of stuff. Teddy bears, letters etc. At first you didn’t think much of it, but when random gifts started appearing all over your apartment, it started to freak you out. You were scared of being alone. If he was able to make his way into your place before, he could break in anytime.

But you’re not supposed to be scared of him. He doesn’t want that. He thinks that nothing that he’s doing is wrong. He wants to be the person you run to when you’re scared, but at the same time nothing gets him more of than the thought of being the person that scares you, and makes you feel so helpless.

He forgets to eat, sleep and to take care of his close friends and family, since he spends so much time watching your social media accounts and following you around in his car.

Today he wants to change things though. He waited for you to end your shift at the bakery that you work at. He inhales the smoke from his cigarette once more before throwing it to the side and making his way over to you.

You were looking for you’re keys to close the store as they fell out of your purse, on the ground. You bend down, trying to pick them up when a muscular pale hand gets ahead of you.

"those are yours right?" He gives you a smirk, handing over the keys with one finger. "y-yes, thank you. Do we know each other?" You inspect his face, convinced that you’ve seen him at your job before. "Oh yeah… I think I’ve seen you around before."

Floch

Floch knows you personally, however you’re not even aware of the fact that he exists…at least that’s what he thinks. Back in Highschool he was more of a loner actually. He didn’t have that many friends but the ones that he had weren’t close to you at all, wich is why you never really talked to him.

The fact that you didn’t see him scratched his ego, and at first he only felt hatred towards you but that quickly changed when he noticed your selfless behavior towards other people.

Floch is the unstable stalker type with a lot of self image issues and insecurities. He feels very entitled, like you deserve being watched by him for not acknowledging his presence. If anything then he’s the victim in this story, for having his feelings played with, right?

Different from Eren he’s not really in to writing letter’s or stuff like that. He’ll just send you hundreds of anonymous messages throughout the day, saying things like "I like the way you did your make up today." Or "what a pretty dress :)" with attached photos.

To him it’s not really stalking, he feels like he’s just 'protecting' you. Making sure you get home safely by following you after you just left your friends house or tracking your location after hacking your phone, was just the beginning of a series of things that Floch would do.

Floch would also actually go out of his way to ask people he doesn’t even like, personal information about you.

He’s totally the 'if I can’t have you, no one can.' type of guy and he’s not shy about it. He hasn’t killed anybody over you but he’s more likely to do so than Eren.

Floch has always struggled with things like lack of empathy due to some psychopathic traits and maybe some kind of personality disorder. That’s also why he never really felt bad whenever you cried over the fact that there was yet another picture of you, that you never saw before, sent via text message.

You were grocery shopping today while talking to one of your friends on the phone when suddenly your cart bumps into another one.

"Oh my god I’m so sorry, I wasn’t paying attention. Are you okay?" You quickly apologize as you turn your head to face whoever you just accidentally hit.

"Yes don’t worry I’m fine." The tall man speaks softly while looking down at you.

He looks so familiar…

"Wait I know you…did we went to school together?" Your brain tries its best to put a name to the face in front of you.

Floch looks at you stunned at the fact that you seem to remember him. He doesn’t know what to say as he feels his heart beating faster and his palms getting sweaty.

"I- I… yes I think you were in my biology class."

He speaks taken back.

"Yeah I remember! Did you change your hair?"

You smile warmly at him, waiting for an answer. He’s too flabbergasted to actually talk to you so he just nods in response.

"How about we go drink a coffee sometime?"

There’s no way you just asked him that.

He doesn’t know if he should laugh or cry right now, but having this conversation with you just showed him that all the analysis he made about you were correct. You have to be the sweetest human being on earth, he just wants to protect you.

"Sure… I’d love that."

Might create a tag list (idk yet)

Don’t forget to like and reblog <3

[casualaruanienjoyer]

Been posting lots of my favourite scenarios on my AO3!

If you'd like to read them, here they are!

Pretending to be you- Aruani

Will you marry me?- Aruani

Triple date- Aruani, Jeanmarco, Reibert mix

I wish I could be there with you- Jeankasa

Babysitting- Jeankasa

Sharing a Bed- Jeanpiku

Before Shiganshina- Flojean

Set up- Eremika

Meeting Niccolo's parents- Niccosasha

More to be added, I've just been tweaking my writing for all these! Enjoy!

[marcobodtlives]

List of AoT Characters Who Have Been Told Off for Biting:

(Not for shifter purposes.)

Sasha (food related)

Eren (he’s batshit insane and off the wall)

Floch (he’s an asshole)

Hange (they’re insane and got overexcited) (Moblit needed stitches)

Ymir (she’s an asshole) (also thought it was funny)

Armin (lost the plot one time) (Jean won’t stop making fun of him for it)

Gabi (she’s batshit insane and off the wall just like Eren)

Pieck (forgot that she can’t carry people in her mouth in human form, it was an accident she swears)

Bertholdt (he was really overtired and angry, leave him alone) (also Ymir convinced him to try it one day)

[since64bce]

Trumper HC: AOT CHARACTERS AS TRUMP SUPPORTERS

I'm not in Amurica or nothin so idek the guy. All I'm sayin is I think he's a funny man so lets go baby yeehaw

CHARACTERS??: CONNIE AND SASHA, MIKASA, ERWIN, REINER, BERTHOLDT, HISTORIA, PIXIS, FLOCH Warnings: Racism, Sexism, ageism, STEREOTYPING, homophobia, transphobia, swearing, soft porn, guns, terrorism, mentions of violence and molesting. (istg im nitpicking here) A/N: pls don't report me.

CONNIE + SASHA 🥹💃🕺 (Cowboy conspirators)

-I have to group them together Im sorry

-"We juhst tew keids werkin togeyther on ower dayddies raynch in teyxas"🤓🤠

-Sashas fam are a few hardened Trump veterans (it's in the braus bloodline) can you imagine her father NOT being a republican smth

-Connies fam is the same.

-Both of their dads are those weird uncles u only see @ thanksgiving once a year. NOT WEIRD IN A PEDO WAY. They the ones who talk abt the flouride makin the rats n frogs gay an whatnot. its a whole thing.

-BAsically con man🧍‍♂️ and sack nut🧍‍♀️ spend their days chewing on straw and standing outside abortion clinics. 👫

-They're probably like 12 or somthing idk

-But yes they really like trump. Hail trump✋. Worship trump🙏. Trump trump trump. Donald J trump💋. Love trump🫶. want trump👀. lick trump🫵. kiss trump🫵. Trump 4 life💪. Trump all day baby🫦. Trump👨🏽‍🦲.

-Honestly they wanna see trump more than trump wanna see them.

-Actually trump don't want to see them.

-He'd get molested, turn around and there'd be two skanky ass lookin children standing behind him how horrific.💀💀💀

-These children aren't normal

-God bless murica ✊✊ yeehaw

Mikasa es tu casa (Chilled out chad)

-Mikasa is one of them chill ones that just mind their own buisness

-Unproblematic chad😌

-She sets an example for the rest of society and shes ripped so lets all take a leaf out of mikasas book shall we

-This aint aot fr this is america 🦅🦅🇺🇸🇺🇸 so she lived happily ever after with her mama and papa ok. no weird human traffickers or nothing🖕🖕. Her parents would've been quite traditional and conservative

-I think she'd believe in the nuclear family and gender roles and what not but her beliefs would be very mild

-You can't get her fuckin forearms from making sandwiches all day babes ❤️‍🔥💪

-but yeah shes a sweetheart ilhsm💋

-And lets just say her being a trumpee is like Gods way of containing this woman

-she wouldn't have missed fr🔫

-And God forbid if she did miss cuz otherwise she'd have gone up there and done it with her bare hands baby

-casual Trump enjoyer

Erwin👱‍♂️ (Facebook warrior)

-He's one a them grandaddy Trumps💪👴. There from the very beginning.❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

-You really think old people are bad at using technology?? WRONG.

-Levi helped him set up a facebook account 💋

-And It's the only fuckin thing he knows how to use on his computer. And he plays around on with his face this🤏 close to the screen, like gurl u don't need to do that 🧍‍♂️💀💀

-just use ur monacle or whatever🤷‍♀️

-But yeah whenever he comes upon gay 🌈🌈people posts on facebook my man has a heart attack. He clutches his chest falls outta his chair as he tries to get his breathing in control. 🤯😵

-Erwin will come across a post of two girls kissing an fickin collapse istg

-And then he'll get his talons out and start producing some juicy ass hate comments👹. He can't control himself, he's like a wild beast🥴😮‍💨, its like his arthiritis stricken claws have a gravitational pull towards that keyboard

-And he doesn't understand the whole algorithm thing either

There he squats with all these gay daddies on his facebook, hate spamming ALL of them AND HE STILL DOESN'T UNDERSTAND WHY FACEBOOK KEEPS SHOWING HIM THESE POSTS🤬🤬😡🫣🤷‍♀️

-He suffering multiple heart attacks a day people get this man off facebook🙌

-And then Levi will come over and see that Erwin has been writing hate comments under pictures of mens bulges on his computer🧍‍♂️

-Who gave this guy the tech knowledge to b able to cyber bully but not to close his damn tabs sheesh

-He's also become a top poster on one of the Trump groups that he follows ✊✊

-Also he uses the N word a lot 🧍‍♂️

Mr big tits (Bible, BBQ and an AK47)

-Oh my dear lovely big breasted Reiner Braun🍒🍒

-tells everyone abt how his papi went to 'nam and died when in reality his papi waz just a bich and left early🤫

-Not enough valour for him ig

-Even tho homeboy aint in the army 🫡 anymore he still stocks up more ammo than his local police department. 🫶🫰

-Hes just a🔅 cutesy little😻 hoarder with a cuetsy little collection of firearms too. 🤤🥰💖🩷🩵💙

-he will also wear cammo vests to the supermarket just to buy himself some spinach. He's a cammo boy. It's all he wears. 😮‍💨

-Aside from his gun collection and cammo obession, Reiner also loves a bit of BBQ here and there.

-believes the Founding Fathers’ original intent included God, guns, and smoked brisket.💪💪🦅🦅

-And country music of course.

-He's just a casual guy nothing too extreme😎🤠

-He owns a pair of american flag speedos tho, is confused as to why people need so many pronouns and passively aggressively competes in lawn care comps with his neighbor

-Somebody make this guy a father pls🥵😳🫃

Bechtolsheim :))))🦒🦒(Wall enthusiast)

-Oh my berty boy whom i love love love😤💕

-Let us b true with ourselves guys mr daddy long legs🕷️here has all our hearts and souls encaptured in his nice ol sweaty palms. I can tell ya now he's a man of the lord. He's down on those knees for j-dawg night'n day bro 🙏. He daps up the homeboy holy spirit on his way to bible study wit Reiner. ✝️✝️🫰

-Boy sure knows how to resist those temptations. Satan who? Sorry, B-dawg doesn't know him

-Everyone just thinks he's a nice guy 🧍🏽... which he is obv 🙄

-(In the daytime🌞, he's bertholdt, just a normal gurl💅🫦, living a normal life😸😝... but theres ✨something✨👁️👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨 about him🧌🥸😱 that, no one ⁉️knows yet⁉️.... 🤨🧐cause he has secrets🤭🥵🥵👹👹👹......)

-he used to b part of a terrorist group.

-☠️

-BUT HES IS(IS) A NICE GUY HE WAS JUS A LIL BIT CONFUSED BACK THEN an thats okay baby everyone gets a bit confused sometimes.

-AND this was before he met God mkay.

-But yeah, now bertholdt has a burning descrimination against muslims.

-Its the trauma man.

-His stereotyping and racism is like a festering cancer, he fights it everyday like a champ 💃💃✊

-And what does this have to do with being a trumpee you might ask?🧐

-Immigration.

-He wants em' all deported

-SOMETIMES Berts inner darkness wins out. He wants to forget his past, he wants to throw it right outta his window!... and out of his country....🦅🦅🇺🇸🤠🍟🍔

-This boy has seen some stuff🙇🏻🥺. And he's slowly getting better with his muslophobia. He tries. The lawd is his chemo, slowly trying to vanquish this dark dark part of himself 👿🦹, bit by bit.

-Never underestimate the power of the lord. Amen.😗

(All u christians go hard tho fr, mad respect. And all u muslims out there we buddies, go snatch that Quran and be a boss kachow)

Historian Reiss (Progress? Don't you mean bull-kaka?)

-SOMEBODY CALL THE TRAD WIFES UP IN HERE👰‍♂️👰‍♂️👰‍♂️👰‍♀️👰‍♀️👰‍♀️👰‍♀️👰‍♀️

-Girly says that the 1950s were PEAK even tho the closest thing to diversity back then was whether or not u liked jazz 🎶🎶😎

-Oh yeah she sure misses them polio days 🤤😻

-But in all seriousness she probs wears those big pantaloon undies😱🥶 like gurl u aint going parachuting thru the clouds just wear normal ones

-She's always googling how to make her child rearing hips bigger🤰🤰

-Not a single pair of pants in HER wardrobe. Not that she'd be able to wear them with her double storage solution underpants. Dresses and skirts ONLY.

-Also they must all be FLOOR length to hide those temptatious ankles🥵🥵😩

-Our modest queen🫡

-She aint trust no supermarket ultra processed shit food either she gets her eggs straight from her own chickens ass🦆 and she grows her own veggies n stuff. Good for her 🤙💪💪

-Although she did once collapse ffrom an iron deficiency cuz she couldn't find her own meat source poor girl

-she hit her head and was unconious for lik 3 days

-Her neighbors saw her undies before they saw her🪂🪂🪂

PIXIS (Mommy, can we put grandpa back into the retirement home now?)

-Bros worse than the braus and springer daddies👹👹👹👹

-He could not only write an entire 500-chapter-50k-words-per-chapter-ten-part book series abt gay frogs🫦, fake moon landings🙀, reptilian politicians🐸, 5G towers, Big pharma, chem trails🥵😷 ect ect ect but he could fact check the entire thing with blurry memes off facebook sent to him by his cousin randy

-He's a fuckin conspricay chad, unstoppable, admirable, irrestistable, alcoholic, crazy, cute🥺, chic, chadilicious bald man👨🏽‍🦲👨🏽‍🦲

-His children shipped him off to a home as soon as he turned 60 and his knee vaguely started hurting

-Hes too powerful

-Pixis does gets invited to special occasions tho cuz his family feel slightly bad

-He be an anti-science, pro magic, potter grade, wizard baby🧙‍♂️. Of course the government control the weather, of course climate change isn't real. 🤷‍♀️

-And he tell everryyyboodddyyy @ the dinner table baby👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨

-There are actually 8 wonders of this world. His offspring. How the. frick did they turn out so normal?🤨

-Anyways he managed to manipulate his son in law once and accidently caused a divorce

-Now he only gets invited to christmas

-And somehow he sneaks flasks of whatever into his nursing home illegally seals them out to all his nursing home pals.

-He's got an army of at least 15 of them that he's planning a coup with.🥳😏

-He also owns a MAGAs hat and suffers from mild heartburn because he only eats steak

Floch (LIBERATE THE MEN, WOMEN ARE THOTS)

-Another country boy but hes a skinny country boy who doesn't own a diesel guzzling man truck or get high blood pressure from eating steak 24/7.

-He lives wit his mama and eats the pasta salad she makes him for sunday lunch. 🧑‍🌾

-But yes he's still a freaky lil fanatic👹🧑‍🌾

-Imagine he lives in a world without pimp-dawg Eren Tate-ger. Whose Floch supposed to follow??? huh??? Donald thats who. Donald trump💪🦵.

-And andrew tate of course👨🏽‍🦲

-He's one of them red pillers who can sniff out a womans virginity from a mile away

-"Wats ur body count???"

-and hes very patriotic too:

-TRUMP IS JESUS 2.0, MY MAN THONG HAS AN EAGLE ON IT,CKAWW CAWW CAWWWW SAY YOU CAN SEE BY THE DAWN EARLY LIGHT WHAT SO PROUDLY WE HAILED AND THE TWILIGHTS LAST GLEAMING🦅🦅🏈🏈🇺🇸🇺🇸???!!!!???? DADDY TRUMPS TAN IS NOT FAKE GUYS WTFFF😡😡😡😡🤬🤬🤬🖕🖕🖕

-He's like a freaky little jehovah's witness guys

-he's so alpha dont you think?🐺🐺🐺

A/N: Sorry I think i fell off a bit at the end but I couldn't b bothered. Also yes ik the bertoldth one was a little wild but dont report me babes thank u very much. later losers.

[moonspirit]

In a modern setting, who in boys would be the green flag and red flag when it comes to relationship??

Heeeeeello anon!

Hmmm oh boi, interesting question? Honestly it depends on the circumstances, but let's take a very basic approach to their characters and see~

Eren? I see him as a red flag, because he has a tendency to let his selfishness run riot, to the point where he misses out on what the other person wants. Also he has a foul temper, and more often than not tries to be someone he isn't. However! That's not to say this red flag can't become green with some attention to what he lacks and therefore, needs :3

Armin? Green flag. I know there's a lot of toxic!Armin and mean!Armin stuff out there, and they're all valid, but taking a very basic character study.... oh this boy is sweet T^T Very sweet and polite and nice. Has some serious issues with himself and also with an acceptance of receiving, but aside all that - super super green malachite flag. Very supportive, positive, loving boi, give him head pats T^T

Reiner? Oh this was hard to conclude on, but I'm leaning more towards a red flag. Because Reiner can be nice and sweet when he wants to be, but he spends too much time in his head and ends up on the verge of self-destruction. Reiner's scared of attachment, of strings getting more tangled than he'd like them to be, and can sometimes act like a completely different person. Of course all of this comes from a difficult history but... red flag for the very same reason~

Jean - green flag. Listen, all he does is ACT like a smug playboy but truth is, he's not that one bit! He has the height and looks and the confidence going for him, but he wants l o v e. He wants a f f e c t i o n, the sparkly kind. Pretends he isn't a virgin, but is a RAGING virgin. Will blush at the drop of a hat. Tsundere on galactic levels. Lost cause honestly.

Connie - green flag but is the ACTUAL playboy in the room, a green kind! Very sweet, very cheerful, local-hype man and seriously enthusiastic about everything, but GOD does he know how to have a good time! He's got rizz and swag and drip and everybody loves him. Was made fun of as a kid for "looking stupid" but puberty hit him like like a somewhat late truck. Now he's that one guy in the neighbourhood who's got all the guys and girls but instead of being an ass, he's really very nice :3

[hardtofindeggs]

thinking about fwb!floch who always wakes up before you do so he can have some time to just admire your perfect features

fwb!floch that likes to make you breakfast under the gist that "your cooking tastes like shit. might as well show off a bit while I'm here. hey, who knows? maybe your dumbass would be able to pick up a thing or two?" when really he just wants you to look after yourself

fwb!floch that asks you how your day went in between kisses; "ha! since when did you give a shit about anything I do, huh, forster?" you always say- all he can muster up is a weak "whatever" before he goes back to leaving rough kisses on your lips

fwb!floch that HATES how close connie gets to you when you make him laugh. that seethes at the sight of jean fake fawning when you dress up for anything

fwb!floch that can only really get updates of you through armin, who's in the same politics class as him, or eren, who he follows around in hopes of you and him running into each other; even though you wouldn't really talk. all because you both (stupidly) agreed to pretend you don't know each other outside of your bedrooms

fwb!floch that hates being in love with you with every fibre of his being

[mommypieck]

Dominating Floch, with him being the lil bitch that he is >:)

that's it, that's the request haha ;) i hope you will write it !!!

(oh also reader is gn!Reader if thats ok)

"please, no more." he whines, his back arching off the bed. his arms and legs are tied to the bed and he can't ignore the ache in them because of how long he's been in this position. you smile at him, loving how cute he is. his tied hands are trying to grasp onto something but when he realizes he's hopeless, he just whines. you turn the vibrator on again and press it to his cock, earning a loud moan from floch. he already has a puddle of cum on his tummy from earlier and you can't wait to make him cum again.

you grab his cock again, jerking him off while you press the vibe to his balls. he lets out a loud scream when you brush your fingers against his tip. sweat is running down his face and his whole body is sparkling in tiny droplets of sweat. his eyes are close and you use the opportunity to lean down and take his cock into your mouth.

"mommy..." he whines, trying to close his legs. you hold his thighs open as you suck his cock. he feels like fainting and he's trying his best not to cum right now.

"i won't be able to last." he moans and you can feel his cock pulsing in your mouth.

"just a little more." you coo at him, your tongue coming down to lick his balls. he can't hold back anymore and he shoots his cum right in your hair.

you pull away, your eyes locking with floch. you can see the fear in his eyes, knowing he did something bad. you slap his cock, making him scream out.

"you wasted so much cum." you say with a stern look and he's ready to cry.

"sorry mommy, i didn't mean to." he says as tears fill his eyes. you just chuckle at him, "don't worry baby, it's going to be a long night."

[beatricebat]

i was trying to draw some old man flojean (idk a good ending with their own creepy cabin au) i have a good vision on what old man jean should look like but for the love of god, i cant picture floch in any wayyy (idek maybe its because i see him as a tragic soul that will always die young) sooo, need some help or do u have any headcanons or good/examples on what old man floch would look like? what would he rock? does he bald? is dentures a need? fjsfsdjfs

I gave this a really good think, because you’re right: it’s tough! I briefly thought about whether Floch should get thin and hunched and spidery (like Anton Ego from *Ratatouille* or Count Orlok from *Nosferatu*) but I settled on something else.

I reckon Floch only stays thin if his diet mostly consists of nationalism and bigotry. If he’s happy with Jean, he’s gonna chub up. A contented Floch is gonna start his day with a selection of breakfast pastries from the local bakery, except on the weekends when he makes them a full cooked breakfast, and he’s also probably going to have a coffee and a slice of cake at a cafe most afternoons. (He’ll be fussily wiping the crumbs from his face while he nags Jean about having an aperitif at 2pm.)

I don’t mean he’s would be a huge guy, because I think he’d still be quite active, and he’d burn off most of it…just not all of it.

I looked at a bunch of 90s/2000s UK comedians with Floch vibes for inspo, because they’re all at or approaching old age. There’s some pretty common themes among them. The middle aged spread is one; shortish grey hair styled into a bit of a quiff is another. They tend to have short beards to hide their jowls, and they often wear glasses with square lenses and thick black frames. That feels like it would suit Floch, right?

Anyway, here are those men. Old versions on the right, younger versions on the left for comparison.

Charlie Brooker:

Charlie Higson:

Stewart Lee:

[worldhell-archiving]

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ @devoteyrheart ⤸ random ask time! bc phew i haven't sent some of these to my mutuals in wayyy too long. for nile + floch + petra + porco + kenny + nifa: what are 5 images we'd find in their phone's camera roll? 👀

this is so cute!!! and very sweet!!!

nile has so many pictures of his wife and kids on his phone that take up 80% of his gallery and he will show them to you if you seem even the slightest bit interested. He also has accidental screenshots of his lock screen because buttons are confusing.

floch's images are screenshots of group chats and photos that are sent in said group chats. he doesn't take photos himself but he has a lot of stupid shit stored in there. the four first images to come up consist of a lot of dumb things said in chat that he had to save because he wants to repost them in that very chat as a dig. the fifth one ONWARD is the other squad members accessing his camera and taking a photo of themselves.

for petra the first three images would be her squad mates and her and she does take it selfie style and oruo is always unprepared and yells at her to take it again so he can make sure his hair looks good. she never does, he looks blurry or is pulling a confused face in every one. another image would be of a flower field that she found inside of the walls and marks it as spots to visit (she also has a lot of these from their expeditions in wall maria) there's one photo she manages to get of the captain when he's looking content. she then has to profusely apologise for taking it without asking first.

porco has so many pictures of himself out and about, and he's got at least one shirtless photo. the others are selfies of him with pieck or colt. he's got a photo he took of the younger candidates just being kids and playing about. the rest consist of close ups of reiner in unflattering angles, he takes them from afar and zooms in really close.

kenny battles with his phone. he's got at least two photos of men he's beaten to blood and bone which he uses just to show them how fucked they look. the other three are unflattering photos of his face that he accidentally took when trying to turn the camera around.

nifa's images are usually saved images of aesthetics or images of her in cute outfits because this girl adores fashion. a lot of squatting by the mirror images. she also has a few of moblit and the team when they're running on nothing by hange's energy and has caught them mid fall when she's trying to take a group photo.

[worldhell-a]

I think it's a very Geto move for Floch to kill his father during his time as a Yaegerist, for wanting to protect the Marely people after falling for one of the captives who now works for the eldian military. Changed his life around after years of being awful to Floch and seeing his mother a lot in him, who left them when Floch was younger. His father who tries to talk reason and for it to turn violent again and Floch just pulls out a gun because, there are no exceptions, not even for his family. Trying to stop Floch with force is basically saying you're an enemy to paradis and a traitor.

[ly0nstea]

My headcanons about Floch's family because the anime never gives us anything:

Flochs dad died in the military when he was very young, he wasn't in the servey corps so it was a very shocking thing

Floch has an older brother and a younger sister, and when he pictures Eldia and Eldian's it's their faces he thinks of. His brother is Eldia's strength and it's pride, and his sister are the innocent Eldians that he wants to protect, when he died it was them he was thinking of, not Eren.

Floch's brother is in the Garrison and his sister is a medic for the military, they both survived the rumbling

Floch really looks up to his brother

Floch's family were told by the government that he died fighting valiantly, and he was given a very large and mournful funeral considering his role in establishing the Jaegerist Regime, he has an empty grave next to Eren's, with a very large headstone with engravings on it

Floch's sister named her first son after him.

Floch planned to settle down and have a family after the rumbling, he was going to name his first son Eren Erwin Forster

Floch didn't have any romantic partners at the time of his death because he wanted to give all his energy to Eldia until it was secure, leading to him being very lonely in the last months before the Rumbling

[casualaruanienjoyer]

AOT Art and Writing Master Post!

Hi there! You can call me Stella! I made this post as a quick and easy way to navigate my work on here. I sketch and write silly moments that make me happy, and I hope they will also put a smile on your face. My main ship is Aruani, but I like many others!

🌊For my artwork including sketch requests and other pieces visit the #stella sketches tag!

🌊For the Reverse Aruani AU I've been writing and drawing about, visit the #female armin colossal annie au tag!

🌊For all my fics, scenarios and headcanons, visit the #stella writes tag! Or use the quick link hub below! I also post them on my AO3!

⭐FIC/SCENARIO LIST

Armin x Annie - Cadet series: Flowers, Weapon , Dance, Question , Want

Others: Will you marry me?, Pretending to be you , Admiration , Triple Date

Levi x Hange - Tea for Levi , Post war Part 1 , Post War part 2 , Post War part 3 , Mixed Headcanons

Eren x Mikasa - Set up , Mixed Headcanons

Sasha x Niccolo - Meeting Niccolo's parents , Inelegant

Jean x Pieck - Sharing a tent

Jean x Mikasa - Wish I could be there with you Mixed Headcanons , Babysitting , Meeting Jean's Mom

Jean x Marco - Triple Date , Small headcanon

Jean x Floch - Before Shiganshina

Reiner x Bertholdt - Triple Date

Mikasa x Sasha - Death

⭐HEADCANON LIST

(WHAT WOULD AOT CHARACTERS DO?)

As a job, After a hard day, On a date ,Playing Monopoly! ,Volunteering with pre-schoolers, At the beach ,Favourite Ice Cream flavour ,DND characters, Playing Sports, At the cinema, At a theme park, What movies they would like, What video games they would like, Pets they would have, As mythical creatures, On a cruise ship, Camping!, At a retirement home, A surprise party for you!, Favourite food