#first off i decided a month ago that christmas holidays was art study time!! all two weeks just hand studies and chill

[ghostighostly]

I have made. Many mistakes,,,

I've gone from 'eh i never do anything dont worry we can play videogames!' To 'Sorry cant talk i have the next 3 weeks scheduled to the second and am actively having a panic attack. Bye!'

How did this happen? Christmas. And divorce, but that's less impactful.

I will now proceed to rant in the tags gootbye forever.

[louiseleblancdiggory]

Merry Halloween

31 Days of Spooktober

Day 5/31

Prompt: “it's december. we can't celebrate halloween in december” “yes, we can” one where rowan can't spent halloween with aelin so aelin decides they're going to celebrate in december

Aelin was exhausted.

She really thought that finishing college and finally working on her own in the gallery would be the best thing ever, but in reality it was just brutal. She had an assistant only twice a week, meaning that the other days she was all by herself working on several different pieces of art that required all her attention. She was hoping that Borte would accept working full week next year, and that Kaltain and Elide would actually join her in the gallery when both graduated in the next spring.

For now, however, Aelin was tired, feet dragging as she came home.

An empty home.

That was another problem she hadn’t thought about before graduating months ago. Her art and history degree had only taken four years, as it was the norm, but her boyfriend, pursuing law, would have to go to Law School for another three years. It was fine, they agreed. It was a lot of busy work but they surely could make it work.

That is, until Rowan moved to Boston and Aelin remained in Chicago.

The long distance relationship fucking sucked, but it was that or breaking up with Rowan, something she didn’t see herself doing in a million of years. And so, for the past seven months, they had been living off phone calls, FaceTime and very rare weekends in which Aelin managed to fly to Boston. It wasn’t by any means ideal, but it was somewhat working.

And yet, as she walked home, looking at all the couples buying Christmas decorations, dinning together and just living their lives with one another, Aelin couldn’t help but feel a deep pang of jealousy. Her two favorite holidays were Halloween and Christmas, and she wouldn’t be able to spend neither with Rowan.

During October, he was too busy with the first quarter tests, and now he was studying like crazy for his midterms. There was no way he could go to Chicago, and Aelin didn’t have the funds or the time to go to Boston. She had to keep the gallery open, especially during Christmas season.

She hadn’t seen her boyfriend in more than three months and it fucking sucked.

She fucking missed him.

Aelin finally arrived in her townhouse, courtesy of her granduncle’s will, and almost cried of relief. She just wanted to take a bath, order something to eat and call Rowan. It was Friday, so hopefully he would be done with his studies for the day and would be able to spend hours on the phone with her.

Thinking better, she could both shower and order with him already on the phone, so as she opened the front door, Aelin also started looking for her phone inside her purse. The thing was way too big and way too full, meaning that Aelin was bound to spend minutes looking for that goddamn phone.

“I need to be more organized.” Aelin grunted, stepping in. She started taking off her scarf as she still tried to look down at the purse. “A-ha!”

Aelin raised the phone triumphantly in front of her, and it took her only a few seconds to realize what was behind the phone.

“What. The. Fuck.” Aelin breathed, gripping the phone harder as she let her coat and purse fall to the ground, feet taking her deeper into the hall. She also felt her jaw dropping, mind so confused she didn’t know what to do first. She didn’t know if this was some of Aedion’s pranks or if she should be actually concerned and call the cops.

All around the townhouse, small Christmas decorations made the place look like it was the fucking North Pole. Even Fleetfoot, sitting by the fire that Aelin was a hundred percent sure she had not lit, was dressed in her small Santa hat, bitting a bone in the shape of a candy cane that Aelin was also sure she hadn’t given the dog.

The confusion only thickened when she realized that every decoration, every small stocking and red lanterns, were exactly where she would have put them. The townhouse was relatively big, and Aelin just knew that if this was one of Aedion’s pranks, he wouldn’t have done it so perfectly.

Aelin’s mind was racing, heart beating fast as she was torn between confusion and the need to grab Fleetfoot and run.

“I’d hope you’d be smiling more in this occasion.” A male voice came from behind her, and Aelin immediately whipped her head to the man now standing near Fleetfoot, hands on his pockets and a grin on his lips. His grey-silver hair was a little longer than the last time they saw each other in person, but the tanned skin, pine green eyes and handsome face were still the same.

Aelin dropped her phone, frozen in place for a single second before a joyful laugh ripped through her. The man’s grin widened, and he walked a few steps forward as Aelin ran to him. She threw herself in his arms, her own arms sneaking around his neck as she pulled him closer to her. Rowan hugged her back with a bone-crushing force, face burying on the crook of her neck, breathing her in.

“What are you doing here?!” Aelin asked, her cheeks hurting from smiling. She pulled her face back, staring right into his green eyes, face also lit with so much happiness that it made Aelin’s heart expand.

Rowan tried shrugging. “I missed Fleetfoot.”

Aelin laughed, hugging his neck tighter as she raised herself on her tiptoes. “I missed you so fucking much.”

Rowan lowered his head, hands going from her hips up to her face, cupping her cheeks as he pressed his mouth against hers. Aelin sighed in content, body immediately melting against Rowan’s as his hot lips moved on top of hers. It had been months since she had kissed her boyfriend, and the feeling of his boy against hers, his lips against hers was the best present she could ask for.

“I missed you so fucking much too, Ace.” Rowan murmured, bitting her bottom lip and then sweeping his tongue lightly against it. Aelin opened her mouth, feeling Rowan’s tongue enter it and touch hers. Her mind that had been racing seconds ago because of confusion was now racing for a different reason, whole body heating as Rowan deepened the kiss, mouth and tongue moving harder and more intensely against hers. Aelin dragged her hands down his neck all the way to the middle of his back, gripping his shirt as she took a small step forward, grounding her hips against Rowan’s.

Rowan’s hands were in her hair, fingers tangling with the strawberry blonde waves. He pulled some strands softly, earning a small and quiet moan from Aelin. When he heard it, Aelin felt a small huff of laughter against her mouth and she was ready to drag Rowan to her room and make up for the lost time.

However, it looked like Fleetfoot had a different idea, because the puppy got up barking, circling Rowan and Aelin’s feet. Aelin drew back, breathless, and looked down. She chuckled at the small, fluffy ball at their feet, and bent down to grab her.

When Aelin got up again, body still pressed against Rowan’s but now with Fleetfoot taking up some space, she chuckled once more. “Looks like someone wants attention.”

Rowan narrowed his eyes. “Traitor. I bring you a present and you cock-block me.” Fleetfoot simply barked, throwing her paws at Rowan’s chest. He rolled his eyes, but smiled as he picked up Fleetfoot from Aelin. “Good to know both of you missed me.”

Aelin chuckled, shaking her head. “Her most of all.”

Rowan took his eyes from Fleetfoot for a second to wink at Aelin before focusing on the dog again. She was still a puppy, meaning that both of Rowan’s hands basically engulfed her. However, she didn’t really seem to care. Fleetfoot absolutely adored Rowan, and he would pretend he didn’t adore her as much. Seeing the two together, Rowan holding the puppy as if it was a toy, made Aelin feel her whole body relax further, a serene smile on her face.

“You’re staring.” Rowan murmured, eyes not leaving the dog.

Aelin shrugged, hugging him tighter. “I wish you could live with us.”

Rowan looked at her, an eyebrow raised and a hint of humor on his face. “Oh?”

They had been dating for over three years now, and it was no doubt that neither of them thought that the relationship would end. Aelin lived with Lysandra during college and Rowan had lived with Lorcan, otherwise they would have probably shared an apartment already.

Aelin rolled her eyes. “Stop trying to get me to boost your ego.”

Rowan grinned, holding Fleetfoot with one hand as the other one pulled Aelin by her waist. “You want to live with me, Aelin Galathynius?”

She narrowed her eyes. “I just said I do.”

“That’s adorable. No, really, I’m fucking flattered.”

“Ha. Ha. Ha.” Aelin said ironically.

“It’s like you’ve planned our whole lives already.”

“Please, be quiet.”

“I’d move in, probably propose during Christmas.”

“You are insufferable.”

“I’d put a baby on you by next Christmas.”

Aelin snorted, shaking her head. “Have you been thinking about putting a baby inside of me, Ro?”

Rowan nodded dutifully. “Definitely have been thinking about the process a lot for the past months. We could be training for it right now if this small version of the Devil wasn’t so needy.”

Aelin laughed, petting Fleetfoot. “Don’t be mean, we three know you kiss the floor she walks on.” Rowan snorted, causing Aelin to smile more. “And if you are wondering, I’ve been thinking about the process too, I promise.”

Rowan grinned, opening his mouth to say something. In a matter of seconds, however, the grin became a frown and he sighed. “I can’t ask it with this thing here. She’s one year old, it’s awkward.”

Aelin clamped her lips together, smirking as she winked at Rowan. “The answer is yes, if you were about to ask what I think you were. Unfortunately you’ll have to wait until this one goes to sleep to be sure. She’ll follow you all evening.”

Rowan huffed half heartedly, walking up to the sofa and sitting down, Fleetfoot resting against his chest.

Aelin snorted, looking at him as she kept standing. The soft smile returned to her lips and, this time, when Rowan raised his eyebrows, his smile matched hers. “What?”

“I love you.” She said simply, walking up to him. She stood in between his legs, one of his hands gripping the back of her thigh as he looked up at her. “And I actually wish you could live with us here. Halloween was fucking shit to spend alone, and you probably will leave by Sunday meaning that I’ll be here alone for Christmas because there is no way I’d make you come back here a week after leaving, and I need to keep the gallery open.”

“Ace…” Rowan brushed his thumb against her skin.

“Long distance relationship fucking sucks.” She mumbled.

Rowan sighed. “Come here.” Aelin sat on the sofa, legs over his lap as he put his arm around her shoulders. Aelin rested her head, looking up at him. He bent down, kissing her softly. “I love you too. And I wish we could have done our Halloween marathon together with copious amounts of candy while we wore those ridiculous pumpkin pajamas, but—“

Aelin immediately sat up, eyes wide and mouth pulled into a smile. “Let’s do it.”

“You didn’t let me finish. And what?”

“Let’s do it. There is a store by the end of the street and all the Halloween decorations are in the attic. I have the movies and the pajamas are probably with the stuff you left in Chicago when you went to Boston.”

Rowan’s brows furrowed. “Ace, it’s December. We can’t celebrate Halloween in December.”

“Yes, we can.” Aelin announced, grinning at him. Rowan shook his head, letting out a huff before nodding.

“Very well.”

Aelin squealed, throwing her arms around Rowan’s neck. He laughed, hugging her back by the waist. Even Fleetfoot raised her head, barking excitedly.

“Ok, so I’ll look for the pajamas in that mess of boxes and you’ll take Fleetfoot to the store.” Aelin said, getting up. Rowan nodded, holding Fleetfoot like a sack of potatoes. Aelin eyed him, shaking her head. “Thinking of you as a father is terrifying.”

Rowan grinned, walking to the door to grab Fleetfoot’s leash. “We’ll be fucking amazing parents, what are you talking about?”

Aelin snorted, walking up to him and placing tow quick kisses to his jaw. “I’ll also take a quick shower. Bring anything we used to buy during college.”

Rowan nodded, opening the door. “Fucking shit, I never forget how fucking cold this town is, and yet I’m always surprised.”

As he left, Aelin ran upstairs, opening boxes upon boxes until she found the pajamas.

She grinned, they were fucking ridiculous.

Aelin had gotten them in a Halloween fair during freshman year of college. At that time, she wasn’t dating Rowan yet, but they had… something. It was strange overall, but allowed them to spend an ungodly amount of time together. When Aelin won one of those hoops games, she chose the stupidest thing she could find. It turns out it was a couples’ matching pajamas— the thing was one piece for each, bright orange with a series of small pumpkins all over it. The hood was green and with a brown thing on top.

It was horrendous and Aelin had to physically force Rowan into them before it became a joke for them.

She then ran to the bathroom, taking a quick shower in the hopes of being ready by the time Rowan came back with Fleetfoot. Although rushed, by the time Aelin went downstairs, Rowan had already arrived back. He even had the time to go to the attic to grab the Halloween decoration boxes.

He looked her up and down when she cam down the stairs, a smile overtaking his lips. “You look ridiculous.”

Aelin grinned, throwing him his ridiculous piece of clothing. “And naked underneath. Now go change.”

Rowan looked her up and down once more, something different in his pine green eyes. When Fleetfoot barked again, he simply sighed, going to the bathroom. “I hate your dog.”

“Our dog.” Aelin singsonged.

For the rest of the night, they put up the Halloween decorations with the Christmas ones, making the townhouse look strangely funny. They sat down to watch the classic movies they always did, eating a whole bowl of candy together. Rowan wasn’t the biggest fan of sweets, but he always opened an exception for Aelin during Halloween.

It was around three in the morning when they finished the fourth movie. Fleetfoot was snoring soundly at their feet, Aelin’s whole body pressed against Rowan’s as he hugged her.

“Want to know something terrifying?” Rowan whispered against her ear, teeth brushing the lobe.

Aelin smiled, still staring at the screen showing the fifth movie beginning. “Huh?”

“We’ll have to clean all this up tomorrow. And take down the Halloween decorations because I won’t celebrate Christmas in a house full of Halloween shit.”

It took Aelin a minute to understand what he meant. She turned her face to him, hope blossoming inside her chest so fast she was almost dizzy. Her nose hit his, and her turquoise and gold eyes were staring straight into his pine green ones. “Celebrate Christmas here? As in you’ll be here a week from now?”

Rowan’s grin was huge and joyful. “Yeah. And New Year’s Eve too.”

“Ro?”

He cupped her face, thumb smoothing over the crease between her eyebrows that had formed because of the confusion. “And the rest of next year. And hopefully all years after that because I wasn’t joking about proposing to you on Christmas, so I hope you weren’t joking about me living here either.”

Aelin let out an incredulous laugh, mouth breaking into a smile as her eye watered. “If this is a joke, it’s not funny.”

“You’re looking at the new Law student in the University of Chicago.” Rowan said, laughing quietly with her. “It’ll be hard to get rid of me now, Ace.”

Aelin laughed out loud, not even remembering that Fleetfoot was sleeping near as she threw herself in Rowan’s lap, legs straddling his hips. She grabbed his face with both hands, pressing her lips against his and kissing him passionately as both of them laughed. Aelin felt as if she was in the biggest high of her life, her whole body consumed by happiness and warmth, head light and yet filled with Rowan.

“Oh my Gods.” Aelin whispered against his mouth, another laugh coming out of his, “Oh my fucking Gods.”

Rowan simply cupped her face back, fingers playing with her hair. “I know. I love you too.”

.

.

.

.

A/N: Halloween, Christmas and Rowaelin. My three favorite things. Thank you so much for this ask, you have no idea how i squealed when I read it! About the kinktober1: I will only post either tomorrow or Wednesday. I’m so sorry, but I bombed one of my tests and tomorrow there’s like a second chance, like a make up, and I needed to study so I didn’t have time to finish. It will be Rowaelin since I’m more comfortable with them. Because of the wait, I think it’s ok I give a small spoiler about which couple tomorrow’s scene will be: Jily.

Tags:

@in-love-with-caramel-macchiato @jlinez @courtofjurdan @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln @ladywitchling @lexflame @sleeping-and-books @annejulianneh111 @perseusannabeth @linshryver @mu-si-ca-l @camilamartinezdunne @dank-queen7 @minaidss @starborn-faerie-queen @booksofthemoon @loveofbooksandwine @jesstargaryenqueen @bluejaberry @multifandommessblog @yesdreamblog @superspiritfestival @ireallyshouldsleeprn @abookishfreak @faerie-queen-fireheart @maastrash @morganofthewildfire @queen-of-glass​ @julemmaes​ @heirofthenightcourt​

[seostudios]

happy without me: all about luv - h.rj

ALL ABOUT LUV ‣ HAPPY WITHOUT ME

just face it, she’s happy without you. but i don’t believe it, is she really?

paring: huang renjun x fem!reader

genre: angst, fluff

word count: 2.5k

info: exes to lovers!au, non-idol!au, college!au, cousin!jaemin

warnings: sensitive themes, emotional abuse, verbal abuse, toxic relationship, mention of rape and sexual assault, sexual assault, explicit/vulgar language 

tag list: @jenotation @luvlyjaemin @woofie-nctzen-fanarts-320 @tzuqui @sunnyrenjunnie @nino7011 @thatanonymousgirl-as14 @minhehe @chrspychan @jimelonji @mykokorobeats4u @aminihhj @jeonjungkat @wishfulldreamss @ilymarkchan @ja3hy4n @beautifulbakerycookiegiant @jisungiepwark52 @sharamanne @commentgirl @littlefluu @chicksung​ @lixseu​ @jenosgirlllll​

a/n: i’m sorry this is so short i did renjun dirty :( i got writers block writing it but it’s ok! ill do better on the next one which is chenle or jeno (prolly jeno) i gotta chekc but yay finally part 2 to all about luv

APRIL IN JEJU

It's been 7 months since you've parted ways with your first love. You two were the supposed high school sweethearts of your year so it confused most of the other students when they found out. Renjun and you were meant for one another but the fact he decided on attending SKKU since had received a scholarship for his outstanding academic records, he couldn't turn down the offer and was determined on enrolling however you were attending Cheju Halla University which was all the way in Jeju City. That was a 55-minute plane ride away from Renjun! Avoiding the future relationship problems to come from long-distance you two would most likely face, the breakup was mutual and you two parted ways at the airport indulging in a rather pitiful hug.

Here you were, walking through the Department of Equine Science, trailing behind your friends Soomin and Mina. It was the first time you decided to skip class and it was thrilling in your opinion, "Come on, they're waiting!" Soomin whisper-yelled. They?

You make sure to ask her who 'they' were since you and Mina weren't standing dumbfounded and possibly in trouble. "The volleyball team dummy," Soomin says skipping to past the classrooms into Gym A. It brought you back to the old times, visiting Renjun during Soccer practice, making sure he's well-fed and not overworked. Quickly snapping out of it you join the girls on the bleachers to cheer on the boys. Although you are able to tell people you've moved on from your first love, you've spent restless nights looking back at your messages, pictures just reminiscing the past.

The butterflies he's caused you still flutter every now and then hoping their commotion was heard and you've finally made the big move back to Seoul but sadly you haven't gotten up and gone yet.

Tonight you were preparing for a mini-quiz, it so happened that Mina shared the class with you. Scheduling a sleepover at Soomin's place here you all are sitting in her living room stuffing your faces with whatever salty and sweet treats her mom had bought. "Oh. My. God." Mina tells you after reading your DM request on Instagram, "What?" you ask confused over what she thought was so extraordinary. She motions Soomin to look at your earning a surprised what the fuck from the girl. "Min-fucking-Ho wants to DM you... He's like one of the hottest guys in our division and has never been seen with a girl so wanting to text you definitely a what the fuck moment. You shake your head before opening the DM request..."He's asking me out for dinner?" You say which Soomin demands you to accept the offer before he moves on. "You've gotta move on from Renjun you know? He won't come by swooping you by the legs asking you for his hand in marriage. He's all the way in Seoul Y/n, I'm pretty sure he's moved on by now with someone else it's time you do too. Now hand e your phone so I can tell him you want to go on that date." Mina tells you after you attempt to reject Minho. She gave you the truth even if it hurt (a lot), you sigh in defeat handing over your phone.

"Can't believe you're going on a date with Minho," Soomin says watching Mina type away. "I know right, lucky girl" Mina replies as you nod. 

APRIL IN SEOUL

Meanwhile, at SKKU Renjun's majoring in Arts & humanities. Languages, Literature & Linguistics which has been taking up most of his time keeping his mind off his recent split. He was devastated the first week but had to obviously push it aside if he wanted extraordinary marks just like in high school, even if he wanted his thoughts to be occupied with your figure in his head he simply couldn't know his classes were paying attention to him along with the other honor students that attended on a scholarship.

"Is that your girlfriend?" Jeno, Renjun's only friend at Sungkyunkwan asked. He's got to know Renjun for who he was today but he's never really opened up about his life before University. Jeno noticed Renjun staring at your recent Instagram post for a little too long to not think you were at least flirting in direct messages. "No," He said quick and panicky before shoving his phone back into his pocket, after relaxing he turns to Jeno. "She's my ex, we broke up 7 months ago." Jeno's mouth goes agape momentarily in realization, "Why? If you don't mind me asking..." He asked the smaller boy beside him. "She went to Jeju for University when SKKU was just a 20-minute train ride from our neighborhood," Renjun replied with a scoff recollecting the memory of the day you told him you got accepted into Cheju Halla. Jeno nods understandingly deciding to continue studying instead of riling him up.

JULY IN JEJU

A full three months have passed and you were still in the first place you were in back in April, heartbroken. Although a lot of things have drastically changed since April it had only made you feel worse about yourself. For starters, you've been 'dating' Minho since April even if you realized on the first date he had only wanted you to fulfil his sexual desires. He's strung his act long enough and you've tried breaking up with the boy for a month now but he won't let you, he's always threatening you "I'll tell the school what type of whore you are."  or something about inflicting pain on someone close to you like Soomin or Mina, which is why you've kept quiet for about the last three weeks.

You were in pulled harshly by the arm by Minho as he pulled you into the supply closet of the Gymnasium, “Minho, I don’t want you to touch me there,” You politely ask the boy who’s currently taking advantage of his supposed spouse. “I don’t even want to date you! Why do you keep acting like this- Let go!” You whisper-yell to Minho who’s trailing his hands up and in between your thighs. "Shut up," He simply tells you before snaking his hand to your mouth shutting you up as you let out a choked cry.

JULY IN SEOUL

"She looks so happy with that Minho, right?” Renjun asked Jeno, scrolling through your tagged post. “I mean from what we know yeah,” He tells him. Renjun sighs, he knew he would genuinely be happy for you if you moved on but it had seemed rather quick. "It's almost been a year, she's moved on. Why don't you?" Jeno asked innocently. Renjun had a gut feeling of some sort; telling him not to move on and instead of ignoring it like you (which brought you nowhere since you're still deeply in love with him) did he's just kept a close eye on you. Shaking his head no he tells Jeno, "Something isn't right about.." He lifts the  phone to the photo of you and Minho, Mina had tagged you in, "That."

DECEMBER IN JEJU

"I promise I'll text you, I just need to get off this freaking island for winter break at least." You tell Mina and Soomin on Face-time, "Okay we will miss you! How did Minho take this? It's your first Christmas together and you leave?" She asked worriedly. You mumble a fuck before looking at the camera. "I didn't tell him," You say earning gasps from the two. "He's your boyfriend though.." Soomin said; "Who doesn't treat me like a fucking human being." Your words were strong, rippling a wave of awkwardness, "I'm fine by the way I’m staying with my cousin Jaemin, but if I don't come back it’s cause he spoilt me into staying."

DECEMBER IN SEOUL

"Merry Almost Christmas!" Renjun screeches before entering his shared apart with his new friend group, Jeno had introduced Renjun to his best pal, Jaemin and Renjun had taken in a very lonely Haechan later introducing him to the two. Today they were all celebrating their first Christmas together with a classic holiday film and cupcakes every day until Christmas.

"Guys we have a guest today!" Jaemin sings opening the door widely to show a shorter girl beside the boy with a suitcase in hand.

"What are you doing here?" Renjun and you said simultaneously as you locked eye contact. "I'm visiting Jaemin, my cousin." You tell him hands moving into the air to point towards the boy, "I am Jaemin's roommate." He responded before getting up from the couch brushing off the crumbs off his lap before walking towards the door to stand in front of you. He hadn't grown any taller still rocking his tiny 5'7 figure, but tall enough to tower over you, who hadn't grown since freshman year.

"She's here." Jeno tells Renjun who's head is under the pillow, "She's here." Jeno repeats, "She's here, She's here," Renjun whispered to himself taking it all in. He always wished for you to get off the fucking island go back into his arms, transferring to SKKU, knowing you had the skill to land a spot without hesitation, but finally seeing you after 10 months of no contact was frightening to him. Why did you seem so brittle? You looked pained, it wasn't his job to care about you anymore, but he couldn't help himself. He loved you more than himself and there's a (humongous) chunk of him that still did. Renjun gets up and sits crisscrossed on the single bed across from Jeno's bed where he was idling on his phone laying down "She's here but she's not here." He said which caught Jeno's attention, his face wrinkling in confusion. "She's not okay, something's wrong. I know it," He finishes getting up to walk out to you- who's catching up with Jaemin in the kitchen while preparing for dinner, stopping immediately as a rush of nerves came over him telling him to stop.

"Hope you boys like Hotteok!" You said facing Jeno and Haechan who were smiling in awe of your cooking skills, "I know Injun and Jaems like it so I made it tonight." You cheerfully smile towards the other two boys. “Glad to see you remembered,” It took a lot for Renjun to even say a sentence to you without having a gaze on you for a little too long afterwards.

It was his chance, he walked out of the bedroom the moment he saw you walk by his door towards the guest room. "Can I come in?" He asked. "Of course Injun," You couldn't believe yourself, being so calm and comfortable with all the tension. Had it really been ten months? He thought to himself as he sat beside you on the bed. "So," He rubbed his thighs nervously "How've you been?" Horrible. You stare down at the carpet admiring it while you figure a way to lie to the boy who knew you better than you knew yourself. "Fine,  I've been..." You sigh avoiding eye contact, "Fine." He looks at you concerned, "You can't lie to me Y/n." Grabbing your hand caressing it for a second knowing it relaxed you a bit in tough scenarios. Suddenly your phone began to ring, grabbing to read the caller id. "Oh, should I go?" Renjun asked after reading the contact name 'Minho' "No!" You shouted quickly grabbed his wrist pulling him back down before he walked out. Declining the call you spoke, "I'd talk to you over anyone any day." Damn, when did I get so smooth You mentally note that smirking to yourself slightly watching as Renjun bursted into a frenzy of laughter, "Smooth," He comments.

"So, was that Minho guy...your boyfriend?" He asked in which you replied with a strong No. "Well," You started "A boyfriend is someone who listens to me someone who values my opinions and beliefs. Someone who is truly interested in what you enjoy doing, or what you like most in life and interested in who I am as a person." You pause to see him grab you hand intertwining your hand, quickly signalling you to continue. "Someone who makes me laugh, or trusts me. But more importantly, disrespect me and force me into," Tears collected in your eyes threatening to fall, "Things." Renjun knows what to do to comfort you quickly pulling you into his embrace, melting when you wrap around him, head in the crook of his neck sobbing quietly. "He made me do things Renjun-ah. Horrible things. I hate him so much, I can't break up with him. Figured running away would've been a better option." He strokes your hair telling you it's okay and to relax. He couldn't help but smile though; he was right. He knew, he knew something was off and made it his number one priority to find out what it was, who would've known you would open up and make your first actual conversation with your ex- whom you dated for a nearly all of senior year about the toxic relationship you found yourself in after him.

JANUARY IN SEOUL

"I got to leave tomorrow." You told Renjun, whom you rekindled an old flame with over your stay. C

"Do you think about me sometimes? 'Cause I think about you sometimes" You asked Renjun looking at him from the mirror, as he watched you do your hair for an outing with your cousin. After that night in your bedroom, you decided on hanging out more and became close friends once more. But the butterflies in your stomach didn't leave, instead, they emitted flying more enthusiastically near him, with him. "I don't think about you sometimes 'Cause I think about you all the time," He said, which made you look down to the floor before turning around to face him. "It made me so jealous knowing you were so far away with that disgusting bastard happy without me" He grabs your hand; which you intertwine your fingers with happily a smile dancing upon your lips watching him reciprocate it.

"Stay." He tells you. You cuddle into his embrace as he caressed the top of your head. The two of your legs entangled under the sheets having one of your midnight talks. "You know I can't," You start quickly zipping your mouth not wanting to go any further, "Students who have outstanding academic records, or who have financial difficulties, who have submitted a complete scholarship application," Renjun said, which just made your jaw drop. Did he do his research?  "You can still enroll for the second semester which starts in two weeks. Have your friends send your belongings." He finished watching as you lifted yourself up resting your head in your palm. "Really?" You asked, breath taken away to say more. Could you really live here in Seoul? With Renjun? "Yes, I can kick Jeno into the guest room while we can have this room all to ourselves." He kissed the top of your hand watching the cheeky smile erupt from you with giggles. "We can be together." You said- asked to yourself, "We can be together" Renjun tells you before pulling you back. 

[victoriareyloficlists]

13 February 2021 Additions to Reylo Work Environment

These fics have been added to the Work Environment list located here.

Boss/Employee Relationship

acquisition by bitterbones (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, 3 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: In which Rey decides she's ready to start a family of her own and Ben Solo, her boss and dear friend, would make the perfect sperm donor.) How Much Can Kylo Ren Endure This Christmas by reylology (AO3 2017  Rated M Complete, 10 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: As the CEO of the number one commercial enterprise in New York City, Kylo Ren would think that bringing home a girl for his parents to meet should be the least of his concerns. But when a phone call with his mother takes an absurd, aggravating turn, he finds himself shoved headfirst into a lie. Desperate to prove his parents wrong, Kylo would do anything in order to see the shocked looks on their faces. Even if it means seeking help from the random girl that had just walked into his office for a job interview.) Designs on you by ReyloBrit (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, 14 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: CEO Ben Solo has a difficult reputation and trouble hanging on to his assistants. But his latest one, Rey Sands, he certainly doesn't want to lose, even if he's not sure his feelings for her are entirely appropriate. This new job will be Rey's first step to becoming an architect. But can she put up with her temperamental new boss long enough to gain the experience she needs and to pay off her debts?) Make Me Over by Hellyjellybean, Twisted_Mirror (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben Solo is a man with a past. The famous actor has used everything from drink to sex to try and fight his demons but maybe all he really needs is the love of a good woman? Rey Johnson is excited to have been appointed MUA to the lead actor on her first film set. From the moment she meets Ben Solo, she's a goner but does he feel the same?) workin' on my fortnite moves by infrarad (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey has been babysitting for divorced dad Ben Solo for a while. When he comes home late from work one night and finds her playing his son's favorite game, she offers to teach him.) Cassonade by CoraRiley (AO3 2016  Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben Solo's world was turned upside down when his wife left him over a year ago. Suddenly alone with a six month old baby girl, Ben's life was in shambles...that was, until, he hired a sweet little College Student named Rey to watch his precious daughter. After months of fantasies and flirting, Ben Solo is finally ready to make his intentions known.) Twas the night before Sithmas... by Hellyjellybean (AO3 2019  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben Solo is alone...and he likes it that way. What more does he need on Christmas eve? He has his whiskey and his bitterness to keep him warm. But Christmas magic can do wonderful things, and a visit from a mystical being throws Ben into a world very different from the one he knew. A world were he is married to the love of his life, he is close to his family and a little boy with dark eyes calls him Daddy. But is it all a dream? Or will Ben really get everything he has ever wanted this Christmas?) Blame it on the Mistletoe by deedreamer, HopelesslyReylo (AO3 2018  Rated E Complete, 5 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey Wilson doesn’t necessarily hate Christmas, it’s just that she’s never really enjoyed it. It’s too over the top, too full of the same repetitive music and consumerism. That’s not to say she doesn’t enjoy some things about the holiday... So when her new boss —and secret crush— Ben Solo catches her singing in her office, she lies to avoid looking like a grinch. Now she’s agreed to spend the holiday with him and his over-the-top Christmas fanatic family.) morning light at daybreak by panoramic (worrylesswritemore) (AO3 2020  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Engineer Ben has found a way to fire every single assistant Leia keeps hiring for him. This new one, Rey, will be no different. He’s certain of it.) Professional by Celia_and (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben is a new bodyguard trying his hardest to do well at his job and be professional. Rey doesn’t see any reason why he can’t do that and fuck her too.) Goodbye, Ruby Tuesday by CaliforniaQueen (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, 20 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Celebrating finishing school and getting a teaching job, Rey Jackson and her friends go out for a night of drinks and letting their hair down. When she meets the beautiful stranger at the bar, she decides tonight she's going to break a rule and be the bad girl for a change. Their one night together turns out to have disastrous consequences for everyone involved. But is being tied down as bad as Rey thinks it is, or is she just afraid to let herself be happy?) Prank Wars by Hellyjellybean (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, 5 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: An office AU where Ben and Rey are office rivals pranking each other, & she sends him a glitter bomb.) broken crown by SecretReyloTrash (BadOldWest) (AO3 2019  Rated E Complete, 4 Chapters, Medieval AU, Quick Synopsis: After he is wounded in battle, Sir Ren makes a shocking discovery about his Squire, Reymond.)

Coworkers

Ben and Rey Self-Quarantine by kalx58 (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Coworkers Ben and Rey must quarantine together after returning from a work conference.) Nocturnal Studies And Other Peculiar Magic by WaterlilyRose (AO3 2017  Rated E Complete, 6 Chapters, Harry Potter AU, Quick Synopsis: Hogwarts was the first home Rey ever had. Now she has a chance to return as a grown woman to be the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. She cannot tolerate the Potions Master and former Death Eater that she duelled and scarred so many years ago. Yet unity must be upheld. Gryffindor and Slytherin will unite in ways never before.) Meet My Pussy by Hellyjellybean, spicytofuuuu (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: When Rey adopts a kitten, she invites Ben over to meet it. He misinterprets this as an invitation for something else. When Ben comes over, Rey says she'll be right back (to get the kitten). He starts taking off his clothes...) Nocturnal Studies Sequel: Into the Lumos by WaterlilyRose (AO3 2017  Rated E Complete, 11 Chapters, Harry Potter AU, Quick Synopsis: What happens after the Happily Ever After? Ren and Rey during their life at Hogwarts. Follow up to Nocturnal Studies and Other Peculiar Magic. Star Wars in a Harry Potter world.) Trope Come True by MWolfe13 (AO3 2020  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Grumpy Ben saves Rey.) Labor & Delivery by ReyReySolo (AO3 2020  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben is an eminent, stubborn OB. Rey is a brilliant, heartwarming midwife. Will their methods and professional judgement clash or can they find a way to come together for their patients and for themselves?) Loveliness Itself by riffraffes (AO3 2016  Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: In which world-famous actor Kylo Ren refuses to see any potential in up-and-coming actress Rey until they finally act alongside one another, and then she's brilliant, so brilliant that his entire philosophy on the crippling emotion of love is altered. None of that seems to matter, though, because Rey absolutely despises him.) First Order IT, Can I Get Your User ID? by krossartist (AO3 2019  Rated T Complete, 3 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Whenever Rey had to call IT, which was about twice the amount of times a normal person would call "excessive," she got the same IT guy. Every. Damn. Time. She named him Fuckhead. He had grown to hate her fondly.) Something Wicked by violethoure666 (AO3 2018  Rated E Complete, 10 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: In the early 2000s Ben Solo and Rey Kenobi were America's sweethearts. Stars of the hit show Something Wicked, they took the world by storm, partying across a gritty Los Angeles landscape and making every headline. By 2017, they aren't speaking, in fact Rey despises Ben and when they are cast together in a rom com, all hell breaks loose. Jumping between the early 2000s and present day, this is the story of two people who found each other, lost each other, and found each other again.)

[cloveroctobers]

ROBERT “BOBBY” MCKENZIE —

IG info/bio : @/returnofdamckenzie | 426k followers | @/mclitgs2 is my forever boo🤟🏽😍 while @/cardib is my WIFE! She just doesn’t know it yet ❤️ support my work & be part of my family: @/bobbymckcares

24 (25) years young

Born in Dundee, raised in Glasgow, Scotland

Jamaican father named Badrick who is a African studies professor

Caucasian/Scottish mother named Catriona who used to be a au pair but now works as a receptionist in senior living — one eye is honey hazel and the other a dark brown

It was difficult growing up in a school that didn’t accept Bobby being biracial, it resulted in bullying to the point where he needed to switch schools (A lawsuit was also in place) The next school was slightly better but Bobby slowly learned to accept himself as it was not something he could control and not something he would want to in the first place. He was proud of where he came from and never thought he was better or less than anyone else, that wasn’t how he was raised

He’s an only child, his parents thought about adopting (and fostering) but with Bobby they had their hands full and he was just enough for them

His family is very family-oriented so he would never have to feel lonely since they gave him a lot of attention, slightly making him spoiled but he was also around his cousins & spending time with them as well

He’s extremely close to his younger cousin (only by a few months) Femi who he views as his sister. They’ve been through a lot together and are always there for each other so it only makes sense

Most likely an active kid always up to some sort of shenanigans whether it’s by himself or with his group of friends, “why would you do that Bobby?” “Don’t ask why but ask, why not!?”

Definitely suffered some broken bones, concussions, & sprain injuries but would never show signs of pain...guys got a high pain tolerance that’s for sure

Fan of films/series “stand by me” & “the goonies” & “scooby doo” since he feels they relate to his life??

Hospital caterer and loves making those feel better with food that he’s created. If he can’t put a smile on patients face with words then he feels like he can show them with food

Food is an art to him. He went to school for culinary & it’s very important for him to show how much it is to him. He picked up the craft from of course his family, who always used food for numerous of things: to bring people together is one of them

Perfected Jerk haggis, it is now he favorite dish next to desert & breakfast!

I’m struggling to figure out what sign he maybe? He’s very playful which may come off as childish at times, which makes me think of Leo? (Maybe Gemini?) Only because they usually hold onto their childhood as best as they can, very generous, & give their energy to you but I also don’t see him being a fire sign at all? So maybe very little Leo in his chart. I also feel like he might be a bit of an empath? He knows when situations around him don’t feel right, knows how to read the room, and always wants to help others by lighting things up.

Idk but I’m feeling he’s libra sun + Gemini moon + Leo rising? Who knows

Probably lived in a 2 bed flat with his old uni mate. It was small and a bit shit but it was their shit and they made the best of it

Now lives in a stone cottage or farmhouse with MC that was built in the 1900’s & is slightly haunted. He’s decided to call them Duncan??? But he believes they’re a good spirit, maybe even a friendly ghost!? since he got comfortable with the bizarre happenings in the new flat & it doesn’t seem like they want to hurt them

Lottie offered to bring her ouija board next time she visited—Bobby declined

House is mostly neutral based but three of the rooms in the flat are covered in ridiculous patterned walls or furniture much to MC’s distaste but, “what’s yours is mine” right? No. But Gary approves!

Has two dogs: a terrier & a collie since MC wasn’t down for getting a sheep

They do have chickens to raise their own eggs tho!

Definitely the kind of significant other that will ride on the cart when they’re out grocery shopping, will make you breakfast in bed, & will send you memes while he’s at home and you’re out or even when he’s at work and you’re at home, let’s you put his arm to sleep when you’re laying on it in bed (big ass head gang!), definitely chooses the candles from bath & body works that smell like food items (majority of them suck let’s be honest)

Probably smells like cucumber, melons, lemons, and eucalyptus

Has your wedding date in his IG bio & is proud

Annoys Gary & Lottie with his food pics, “oh, Not this shit again! 😡 looks brilliant, but enough!”

Has zoom/FaceTime movie nights with Marisol & MC who stopped feeling like she was third-wheeling months ago

Talks to hope & Noah (in the background) as much as he can. Feels like they’re his inspiration for love, even tho he’s the only one married out of the villa

He values marriage just like his parents do and often has Sunday dinners with them & MC ofc

Probably has relationship guide books and only reads them out of boredom but finds fascinating facts/advice if he pays attention & tries to apply it to his relationship with mc. If it works, it works! & If it doesn’t, you can’t say he didn’t try!

Works long hours but will still come home to cook for MC or brings leftovers from the events he’s catered (most are for the hospital but occasionally he’ll do other events)

Has a separate IG for his work

When WAP dropped, he almost lost his shit. Even tried to get MC to do the challenge with him, he’s pretty bad but MC eventually learned it just for him 😜

Is thrilled that Cardi made the best decision EVER on divorcing offset, “are you thinking of leaving me now?” “... I might.” “BOBBY!” “Haha, I love you!

Absolutely loves Christmas!!! It’s his favorite holiday and he loves giving back to everyone in his life. Usually he’s working overtime for the holidays & it makes him emotional due to the stories he hears & he puts a little extra love in his food

Goes all out for Christmas. Tries to buy/make everyone something. Even if he doesn’t really care for them...he’ll at least send them a x-mas card, if they keep it or burn it it’s entirely up to them—if he knew about it he’d probably be a little sad not gonna lie...he’s a soft king

Once bought Lottie black crocs with spooky pins , “are you joking Bobby?!” He knows she secretly loved them

Uses salt and peppermint in his dark hot cocoa...

Rather make deserts for Christmas than the food, he feels like it’s his duty

King of giving the thumbs up, especially when situations have gone to shit. He’ll still shoot them up with a smile or a grimace

Always inviting someone somewhere. “Bobby, hun. You’re 4-6 hrs away and it’s 1 am.” Hope groaned after listening to his bright idea, thinking something bad happened. “Ah, you could still make it if you tried, lassie.” “I’m gonna hang up now. Good night, bonkers man.”

Needs constant reminding when to get his locs touched up & moisturized

Either has a trampoline or a funhouse jumper in his backyard (maybe both) “we’ve got the space and this is better than a pool, or almost!”

Wants children, a whole footie team! There’s no specific time frame for him, when it happens, it happens

Used to cool & wet temps & loves vacationing in Greenland. Sure the hot weather he experienced in the villa was awesome & something different than what he’s used to but you can’t take the scot out of the man. So he typically sticks to places that are similar in temps, that way he doesn’t have to change his clothing choices much

Loves a good bath. Bubble baths are better than bath bombs to him, PERIOD!

Loves bubbles so much he put too much laundry detergent in the wash (does this on purpose now) and came back home to the dogs and room covered in it. Do you think he cleaned it up before MC came home? No. He decided to have a bubble party in the room with a Caribbean playlist playing in the background

MC definitely posted about it the first time & joined him for a bit, dreading the work that came with cleaning it all up. Now whenever Bobby needs a bubble party, he knows what to do. MC preferred him to have his little bubble party in the tub but 50% of the time he chooses not to listen & they leave him to pout & clean it himself

Likes to hold hands with fingers interlocked. When it’s cold and if you’re both wearing hoodies, he’ll slide his hand inside the arm of your hoodie to help keep you warm

Canon: His version of a snack is spaghetti hoops on toast & can eat that for the rest of his life & be content

If he didn’t end up marrying MC, probably finds his significant other working as a nurse at one of the hospitals he caters to or a volunteer at a old folks home

Never had a serious relationship, very few hookups, was either always placed in the friend zone or there was one person he wanted to be serious with but they rejected him and continued loving someone else who treated them like shit—so he kinda swore off of relationships and just flirted a bunch and kept his love life non-existent

Fav ice cream? Rocky road ice cream with one scoop of cotton candy & one scoop of cookie butter blue

Doesn’t believe in measuring when it comes to culinary. He uses his eyes as his measurement, could be a bad thing, could be a good thing, that’s up to you

If he’s up at night, he’s eating something sweet. A nice glass of single malt scotch whiskey + a splash of coconut milk (🤢) with a slice of angel food cake & he’s out like a light

Absolutely loves shopping for the kitchen, finds immense joy in doing so. If you lose him in a store, one of the places you’ll most likely find him is in the kitchen decor area

Owns a bagpipe & wants to get better at it, even tho he scared the living shit out of his dogs & chickens

Wears his shades quite a bit even tho the weather is hardly sunny and mainly windy & damp

Will hold the door for strangers even if they don’t say thank you

He’s open when it comes to music. Will listen to anything but feels like the music has to be a purpose for something...Everything he does in his day to day life has to feel like a soundtrack to him since in his mind he’s daydreaming about his life being made into a movie. Who isn’t?

He thinks wentworth Miller should play him in a film and that kid from blackish should play him when he was a wee lad, Marcus Scribner

Always keeps a positive attitude because he knows what it feels like to feel low and he doesn’t want anybody else in the world to feel like that so he wants to uplift and if he can try to be someone’s happiness he’ll gladly be that— which isn’t always the right move, he learned

Listens to: Rotimi, Shaggy, Sean Paul, Skip Marley, H.E.R., Jhene Aiko, Jorja Smith, UMI, The Kooks, The Killers, Cold War kids, Milky chance, Blood Orange, The 1975, Vampire Weekend, Bad Suns, BRYSON TILLER, Kilo Kish, & Ella Eyre (although he misses her old music)

Celeb crushes? Cardi B is his mfkin celeb wife okay?! Nobody else comes above her! He also thinks FKA twigs is pretty & super talented, sevdaliza!, Tia & Tamera, Iman, and brandy from the 90s makes him swoon

Anthem = jaden, “Boys and Girls”

[captainscanadian]

Stay | Bucky Barnes x Reader (Part 1)

My Masterlist

Prologue

Summary: Twelve years ago, you ran into a former classmate of yours at a grocery store and ended up going on a life changing adventure. Thanks to your dear older brother, the two of you had become closer than you used to be. But Bucky Barnes... you had no idea what was going to happen between the two of you.

Word Count: 6535

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Tamilian!Reader, Natasha Romanoff x OMC Arjun Y/L/N, Steve Rogers x Platonic!Reader

Warnings: MINIMAL TAMIL DIALOGUE (I’m more than happy to translate!) & TAMIL CULTURE, References to Tamil Literature & Poetry, Mild Swearing, Alcoholism

A/N:This is my entry for @bucky-smiles​‘s 2K Bollywood Writing Challenge! My prompt was to write a Bucky fic inspired by my all time favorite Bollywood movie - Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani! Y’all should go watch it because it’s fucking amazing! But I decided to write this fic with a Tamilian reader because I am Tamilian. I was born in Sri Lanka. But I know that there are a few other Tamilian friends on this site who would love to read this. @jalapenobarnes​ & @fafulous​, THIS ONE IS FOR YOU, MY CHELLANGALA! Ever since I posted this fic, I have received so many kind messages from my fellow Tamilian and other Desi Marvel fans who appreciate the representation that this fic has provided for them. I appreciate every single one of you from the bottom of my heart. Thank you so much for your support for this fic!

12 years ago...

You pushed your black framed glasses up your nose as you squinted, the lined piece of paper in your hand looked like it had been ripped off of an old diary that your mother used to keep. The strains of oil and turmeric on the corner of it, and your mother’s writing in smudging black ink; you wondered how she had even thought that you would be able to read what she had even written. You looked down to read the grocery list in your hand as you let out another exasperated sigh. Your mother’s squiggly Tamil manuscript was barely legible as you tried to figure out what she had written for you to buy.

Despite the fact that you had moved to New York when you had been eight years of age, you had managed to learn English as a second language. While you were fluently speaking English by the time you were ten and had worked rigorously to be rid of your accent that had been the cause of all of the bullying that you had to endure, you could not let go of your first language all that easily either. Your parents had been it their mission to ensure that both you and your brother did not forget how to read, write and speak your mother tongue. From binge-watching VHS copies of old South Indian soap operas to enrolling you in Tamil language credit courses while you were in high school, their mission had certainly been a success.

You spoke Tamil just as well as you wrote it. Your knowledge of Tamil literature and poetry was also fairly extensive, compared to most Tamil kids who were actually born in America. You had read most of the Thirukurral and the poems of Mahakavi Bharathiyar, even Kamba Ramayanam and Silappathikaram. You had your father to credit for that. Your reading comprehension was fairly decent as well, but nothing could have prepared you to decipher what your mother had written on that marinated grocery list of hers.

“Hey, what the fuck are you starin�� at, huh?!” You heard a familiar voice call out, startling you in an instant. “Haven’t you ever seen sexy legs before?!”

As you looked up from the grocery list in your hand, you noticed the familiar red-headed Russian girl whom you had once attended high school with. In her ripped denim shorts and leather jacket, she looked quite feisty as she argued with a young boy whom she had just caught staring at her from behind in the checkout line. She had always been a ticking time bomb, not taking shit from anyone, teachers, bullies and cat callers alike.

“... I have. But those legs aren’t sexy.” The boy had responded to her with sass.

Your eyes grew wide as you parted your lips, unable to believe that a boy his age would dare to challenge someone like that. What even happened to kids these days?

“I’ll fucking slap you!” Natasha Romanoff spat at the teen, raising her voice as she grew irritated by his response. “Apologize! Apologize, right fucking now.”

At that point, the entire grocery store had been staring at the two of them. Leave it to Natasha Romanoff to start a scene like this. She had done so much more during her time in high school though.

While the two of you had not been close, you knew her well enough to know that she was not one to be messed with. The number of times she had almost gotten into physical fights with the jocks and the bitchy cheerleader girls who teased her for being a tomboy and ended up in detention were endless. If it had not been for her two best friends, you were sure that she would have gotten suspended or expelled for her behaviour. After all, that was a consequence to her non-conformity to high school stereotypes.  

This poor boy must have been taken aback by her outburst. But he must have thought twice before he stared at her ass and sassed her out when she caught him. If anything, he had to learn his lesson the hard way. “Sorry...”

“Good. Now go stand on the other checkout line and don’t even dare to stare at me, you idiot.”

As you watched the boy walk away from her in defeat, you made your way over to the checkout line having given up on figuring out what the remainder of items on your mother’s list were. If you could get out of here before it got dark, you could stop by the bookstore on your way home and pick up some of your textbooks for the next semester.

It was the holidays after all. You did not have any plans to celebrate; not that you had anything to celebrate anyways. Diwali had been a month ago and it had been a decent celebration. While lighting fireworks and clay lamps was out of the question, you had spent it with your family by heading to the temple and sharing some homemade sweet treats among yourselves. You and your family did not celebrate Christmas, so you had been planning to study your ass off during the holidays.

With your three weeks off from school, you were planning on getting a head start on your readings for the following semester. The perks of being a pre-med student at an Ivy League school meant that you had a lot of pressure to excel academically. Often times this meant that you barely led a social life. Not that you minded, really. You were content with spending all of your free time being buried in textbooks and studying the last of your teenage years away.  

A typical Tamil girl your parents had always wanted you to be, you had retained your innocence for as long as you could. At twenty-one years of age, you had never been kissed and never had a drop of alcohol enter your system. You still lived at home with your parents while your older brother had found himself moving out after he had left high school. It was just how things were and you had accepted it, not having a single rebellious bone in your body. As most first and second generation immigrants alike, you had found it hard to be the perfect Tamil daughter and a perfect American teenager. You had resorted to being the former, therefore sacrificing any prospects of close friendships or a social life in the process.

As you made your way over to the checkout line next to hers and began to unload your shopping cart, Natasha was quick to notice you as she began unloading her shopping cart as well. Recognizing you in an instant, she grinned widely. “Y/N?! ...Y/N Y/L/N?” She called out to you, her lips curling into a smile as she shook her head in disbelief.

You smiled at her as you laid out your groceries onto the belt. “Hi... Natasha.”

“What’s up, dude? Long time, huh? What have you been up to these days?”

“Nothing much...” You replied with a shrug. “Just... trying to get through pre-med, you know? Columbia’s been kicking my ass.”

“Oh wow, that’s so cool.” She beamed, waiting for the cashier to ring up her items. “You’re still the same, Y/N. Even in high school, you were a straight A student. That is so amazing.”

“How about you, Natasha?” You asked her as the cashier began to ring up your items. “What have you been up to?”

“Just... arts, you know?” Natasha shrugged. “Studying has never been my thing, you know? Thank God, it’s the holidays though! I’m so glad I can finally relax and let loose.”

“Any plans for the holidays?” You asked her, curiously. As someone who has never had a proper holiday for yourself, you wondered what other people did during the holidays.

Perhaps, you wished to live vicariously through everyone else’s experiences. The only ever time you had a chance to travel were during the trips back home with your family. Other than that, you were pretty much stuck in Brooklyn.

“I’m heading to The Hamptons tomorrow...” She replied, excitedly. “We’re going to be skiing!”

“The Hamptons?” You asked, your eyes growing wide at her response. “That sounds quite fancy. What? Are you going with your family?”

“Oh no, I’m actually going with my friends. As a matter of fact, you know them too. Steve and Bucky, you remember them. Steven Rogers... as in my best friend? And Bucky, I mean, James Buchanan Barnes... you know him. He used to skip class all the time and get detention. You even had to tutor him for algebra once for extra credit or something, remember?”

Your eyes grew wide as you recalled her two best friends. You were slightly surprised that they had managed to keep in touch with her after all these years. But then again, the three of them had always been close. They were known as the inseparables around school, always hanging out with each other and slacking off in class together.

Often times, you had found yourself being jealous of their friendship. You wished you had that kind of bond with someone. You had always wanted a best friend but all you had was your older brother.  You had been so lonely ever since you moved to New York.

For some odd reason, your parents had been against you befriending anyone who was not Tamilian. Apparently some bullshit about how anyone else would have corrupted your innocent mind and derail you from your path to being the perfect daughter you had always been. They had claimed that while they ‘trusted’ their daughter, they did not trust the society in which they had to raise their children. It was all bullshit.

Truth be told, your parents really had ruined your chance to make any friends at all. As much as you let your social anxiety get the worst of you, you had to blame them for the role they had played in your lack of a social life.

“Oh... right.” You reached into your purse to pull out the cash that your mother had given you, handing it over to the cashier and taking back your change.

As you grabbed your bagged groceries, Natasha had paid for her own things before walking over to you. “Hey, are you headed home? Come on, I’ll give you a ride.”

“What?” You looked up at her in surprise. “Oh no, Natasha... it’s fine. I can take the subway back.”

“Hey, it’s okay. I’m heading over to see my parents anyways and they live down the street from yours. I’ll drop you off on my way.” She offered with a smile. “Come on, dude!”

For how long could you keep avoiding the kind gestures from people and push them away? You had known Natasha since you had first arrived in New York and you knew that you could trust her, even if your own parents would be against that. Thanks to her short hair, tattoos and piercings that made her seem like bad news according to their judgemental eyes. But at this point, you could care less about what your mother would think about you accepting a ride from Nat. “Fine...” You gave in, struggling to carry your groceries.

“Here, I got it.” Taking one of the bags from you, she began walking out of the store with you in toe. “So, what are your plans for the holidays, huh?”

“Not much, really...” You replied with a shrug. “Just getting ready for the next semester, I guess.”

Nat stopped in her tracks before turning around to face you, her jaw dropping slightly at your response. “What the fuck, Y/N? You really need to give yourself a break. You need to go and do something fun.”

A part of you knew that she was right about that. But truth be told, you did not know how to have fun. For the longest time, your idea of fun had been burying yourself in school. Studying had been fun to you until it became the thing that you always did. Not to mention your lack of a social life ever since you were a kid. After all, you had never even been to a sleepover. Now a legal adult, you had never been to a party. Never been kissed and never gotten drunk. You lived quite a boring life and you did not know how to fix that. “I don’t know, man... I never really did anything fun during the holidays. I just studied... a lot.”

Letting out a sigh of disbelief, she turned around to walk over to her car. “I’ll tell you what...” She unlocked her car before opening the trunk. “Why don’t you come down to The Hamptons with me?” It had been a casual offer, perhaps even one that she had thought you would refuse in an instant, which you initially did. But Natasha knew you and knew how hard it had been for you to make friends in high school. She was finally making the effort to be your friend by offering to let you join her on her trip; she should have done something like this many years ago. But better late than never, right?

“What?!” You gasped, hearing her offer. If it had been that easy for you to pack up and leave to The Hamptons with a skater girl and two boys, you would have done it in a heartbeat. But you knew your parents and there was no way they would even allow you to go on this trip if you had even bothered to ask them in the first place. “Oh no, I can’t...”

“Come on, Y/N! It’ll be so much fun!” She grinned at you before loading the grocery bags in her trunk. “It’ll be just the four of us. It’s like you’re going to be on a trip with strangers. It’s just four school friends hanging out together for a week, catching up.”

“Oh no, Natasha... I shouldn’t be intruding.” You shook your head as you handed her the last of your bags. A part of you was longing to take her up on her offer, but you knew your parents very well and you worried about what they might think. They would never allow you to go off to all the way to The Hamptons with the kids they would have never approved of you to be friends with. Even if you were a pre-med student at Columbia University with a 4.0 GPA, no achievement would have made you worthy of such a trip when it came to their standards.

“You won’t be intruding at all.”

“Yeah, but...” You shook your head at her. “My parents would never allow it.” This had always been your excuse to turning down every invite to a party or a sleepover during high school. Your parents never allowed you to make friends with anyone, because that was just how it was.

“Well, then... we’ll sneak you out. You can’t let your parents dictate what you do and don’t do anymore. How old are you? Like... twenty? Twenty-one? You need to start making your own decisions at some point...” She was right. She knew exactly what she was talking about. “Y/N, you’re a good kid... you’re a good student, you’re doing good in school and working hard. You’ve got to give yourself a break. But there’s nothing wrong with being a little selfish sometimes.”

You sighed. “I... they won’t... I’ve never done anything rebellious my whole life, Natasha. And I don’t know how to... I can’t risk getting in trouble with my parents.”

“That’s why you have me, babe. I’ll sneak you out and have you back home in one piece. You have nothing to worry about. Just pack up your belongings tonight and meet me outside of my parents’ house at 3 in the morning. We’re driving up to The Hamptons ourselves.” She told you. “You don’t even have to pay for the gas. Just bring yourself enough pocket money to rent some ski gear and spend on booze or whatever... and we can spend the whole week skiing.”

“Natasha...” You bit down on your bottom lip. “I can’t...”

“For old time’s sake...”

“I need to think about it.” You admitted.

“Fine... I’ll wait for you until 3:30. If you don’t show up, you’ll see me drive past yours from your bedroom window.” She told you with a playful eye roll. “It’s your loss, Y/N.”

When Natasha had dropped you home that evening, you found yourself locked up in your bedroom for the remainder of the night. You paced back and forth, staring out your window to see her car parked down the street in front of her parents’ house. You had a few hours to contemplate taking her up on her offer. It was either spending another dreadful holiday drowning in your anatomy textbook or skiing with her and her friends. You finally had a chance at making friends of your own and it looked too good to pass up. But the thought of being caught by your parents terrified you, for the punishment would be a harsh one regardless of your academic achievements that should seem to balance it out.

So you did the best thing you could in your search for clarity and told your brother of this offer right away. While being of the male gender had certainly given him more privilege within the family, he knew that his freedom to do whatever he wanted was not something he could take for granted. He understood that as privileged as he was for the way your parents had been lenient on him, you were held to a higher moral standard than he was. Truth be told, he hated that and when it came to advocating for you and what you wanted, he always took your side when arguing with your parents. He was a true ally and the only real best friend you had so far. You could trust him.

“I’ll sneak you out.” Arjun offered in an instant.

Your jaw dropped as you heard his offer. “What?! Anna... are you insane? Amma and Appa would kill me they found out that I left!”

“Illa di, listen to me for a sec. I’m on your side here. Sometimes, you have to be rebellious and go out and get what you want.” He advised. “You’ve been too much of a goody-two-shoes to be treated like shit. I say you take the chance and get the hell out of here for a week.”

“Easy for you to say...” You mumbled as you rolled your eyes at him. “You don’t even live here anymore. But I do... and I don’t want to deal with all this crap because when I get back from this trip, you’ll be gone back to Harvard and I’m the one who’s stuck here.”

Your brother thought for a moment. “I’ll give them an ultimatum.” He suggested, shrugging his shoulders. “If they give you crap for going on this trip, then I’ll drop out of Harvard and flip burgers for a living. Trust me, Amma wouldn’t want that.”

“Anna... no, seriously... no!” You shook your head. “You’re being so dramatic right now and there’s no need for that. I’m not going.”

“Hey... po, di. If you don’t want to go for yourself, enakkaga po. Do this for me, please, di?” He told you with a pout. “Go out there and make some friends. You deserve it.”

You bit down on your bottom lip before sighing. “I’m terrified... but... I also want to go.”

“Then go. Go to the Hamptons... go make some friends. I don’t want you to end up friendless when I go off, get married and have my own family one day.” He admitted, chuckling softly. “You’ve been alone for so long, di kannamma. Go enjoy yourself while you’re young. You deserve it.”

You nodded as you pulled him into a hug. “You’re too good to me. Thank you, da Anna. I honestly don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Hugging you back tightly, he sighed in contentment. “Anything for my kannamma.” He laughed as he held you close. The two of you shared a close bond and it was frankly because you were each other’s best friend. He would take a bullet for you in a heartbeat, so it was no surprise that he was willing to face your parents for your sake. “Now go up to your room, pack up your things and wait. I’ll come and get you when it’s time and we can climb out my bedroom window, sariya?”

You laughed softly and nodded, pulling back from the hug. “Sari...”

And with that, you had snuck up to your bedroom and managed to back yourself a suitcase full of your belongings. You were only going to be there for a week so there was not much to pack. But you were also cautious of how much you packed anyways, considering that you would need to launch this suitcase of yours off of the roof before you managed to sneak out your brother’s bedroom window. The last thing you wanted was for your parents to wake up from the commotion and catch you red-handed. You did not need this attempt at going on a holiday trip to come to an end before it had even started.

When the time came, your brother had helped you climb out through his bedroom window and threw your suitcase onto the sidewalk. Once he climbed down the roof, he helped you down and the two of you sprinted down the street towards the Romanoff Residence.

“Nat!” You called out to the redhead as you reached her parents’ house, your brother following after you with your suitcase.

“Y/N, you made it!” Natasha grinned as she ran up to you, tackling you with a triumphant hug.

You were taken aback by her embrace but you returned it anyways, your heart still beating right out of your chest from the adrenaline rush that came with sneaking out of your house and running down the street. “Yeah, I... I did.” You admitted, laughing softly. You were glad that you had not backed out of this ordeal, thanks to your supportive older brother who wanted nothing more than for you to be happy.

Arjun watched as the two of you pulled back from the hug. “Natasha Romanoff.”

“Arjun.” She bowed her head at your brother. “Good to see you. Thanks for bringing her over.”

“Don’t mention it.” He winked at her before turning over to you. “You two should get going.”

You nodded as you pulled your brother into a tight hug. “Thank you... for being the best big brother I could ever ask for.” Your eyes glazed over as you realized how much trouble he was going to be in for the part he played in your disappearance for a week. But you were grateful that he had been there for you. “I love you, da Anna.”

“I love you too, di kannamma.” He hugged you tightly. “Have fun, okay? You deserve it.”

Natasha stood by as she watched the two of you say goodbye to each other. A part of her found it quite warming that the two of you had such a close bond. But unbeknownst to her, she had also admired how genuine and attractive Arjun really was. But that was a story for another time.

Once your brother had returned home, you and Natasha climbed into her car and she began driving towards Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes’ loft apartment. After all, this entire trip had been planned by the formerly chubby-cheeked and crooked-toothed boy whom you used to tutor. Hopefully, he would not mind that his little excursion had been crashed by his high school class’s resident ‘scholar’.

Present Day...

You tossed and turned in bed as you struggled to fall asleep, snuggling up to your pillow a you pulled the duvet over your shivering body. Despite the fact that you had slept in this bed for years, you had a hard time sleeping in it now. It was as though a part of you had forgotten how it felt to be home, which was partly your fault. After all, it had been your choice to leave home after you had graduated from Columbia. Your search for even the slightest of freedom had been satisfied, but coming home had always been a pain in the ass. You could not sleep.

You sat up in your bed as you let out a sigh of exhaustion, leaning your back against the headboard as you looked around your dimly lit childhood bedroom. Letting out a yawn, you reached over to grab your phone from the nightstand to check your notifications, hoping to see some missed call or text message from work so that you could have an excuse to leave the house in the middle of the night, this time through the front door rather than your brother’s bedroom window.

But you had been disappointed to find no messages from the hospital, meaning that you had no choice but to force yourself to go back to bed. Before you could lie back down though, you heard a slight knock on your door. “Kannamma?” Your brother said softly as he knocked. “Thoongittiya, di?”

“No... I can never fucking sleep in this house anymore.” You groaned as you climbed out of bed and made your way over to open the door. “Anna? What the hell are you two doing up at this hour?” You noticed that he was dressed in a pair of slacks and a button down shirt, a half-asleep Natasha standing behind him. “You were on call tonight?”

He nodded. “Yeah, I was... I just got called in. You think you could keep your Anni some company while I’m gone?” He asked you with a chuckle. “She likes you more than me.”

You nodded, giggling slightly as you yawned. “Sure, I guess...” You moved out of the way so that Natasha could enter your room and you let her hug you from behind. “I think she loves me, actually. She loves me more than you.”

“Yeah, keep saying that to yourself.” He mocked you with a playful eye roll before turning over to his future wife. “I’ll see you in the morning, Nat.”

“Drive safe, baby.”

“Bye, da.”You called out to him as he walked away.

Natasha chuckled as she made her way over to your bed and lay down. “I can never get used to this.” She admitted as she climbed under the blanket and stared up at the ceiling for a moment.

You closed the door behind you before walking over to your bed. “You know he doesn’t like working nights. He just has no choice in that matter. He’s trying to get it all sorted out, you know. Hopefully, he can open his own practice at some point.” You admitted. “I on the other hand, I love working nights. I love that I don’t have anyone to go home to, unlike my Anna. Hell, it feels strange not working tonight. I can’t even fucking sleep right now.”

She turned over to face you. “You do work a lot so I guess being single is convenient for you.” She agreed. “But do you ever see yourself... actually having someone to go home to? Getting married and having kids of your own?”

You let out a chuckle before shaking your head. “Did you? Did you ever think you’d be getting married... to anyone, let alone my brother?”

“No, I didn’t... but fate works in weird ways, doesn’t it? It brought you and I together and then... it brought your brother and I together.” Natasha reminded, sighing as she hugged you gently.

“You ever wonder what would have happened if we had never run into each other at the grocery store that day?” You asked her, curiously.

“We wouldn’t be best friends.” She admitted, laughing. “We wouldn’t be family. I think we have Arjun to thank for that night.”

You nodded. “Yeah, I guess... if it wasn’t for him, we wouldn’t be best friends.” And you wouldn’t have fallen in love with Bucky Barnes either.

12 years ago...

You covered your ears with your hands as Natasha honked one more time, hopefully the last time she would do so within the last ten minutes. The sound of the never-ending honking must had woken up the entire neighborhood by now, but unfortunately, Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes happened to be heavy sleepers.

“Oh for fuck’s sake!” She called out as she rolled down the window. “Steve, Bucky, I swear to fucking God if you don’t get your asses down here in two fucking minutes, I’m leaving without you!” She called out towards the second floor window of the building you had been parked in front of.

Despite the fact that it was way too early in the morning to be causing a scene in the middle of the street, it seemed as though the redhead did not give a shit about any of that. Her friends were both running late and she was certainly not happy about being the only one who had any sense of punctuality between the three of them.

After all, it had been Bucky Barnes’ idea that they drive all the way to The Hamptons at the ass crack of dawn. The least she would have hoped was for the two of them to be ready and waiting for her to arrive. But instead they had both been sleeping on their asses until she pulled up and honked for them to come out. With her lack of sleep causing her to be irritated, she was in no mood to be driving as it was and the boys being late was not helping at all.

It was another few minutes and constant honking before the two boys came running out of their apartment building, their duffel bags and ski gear in hand.

“Jesus Christ, Nat! You probably woke up the entire neighborhood!” Steve Rogers yelled at his friend as he loaded his belongings onto the trunk, followed by Bucky’s.

Bucky Barnes ran his hand through his wet hair that had now frosted up in the cold as he got into the car, his eyebrows furrowing as he noticed the uninvited guest in the backseat. He looked just the same as he did three years ago, the only difference being that he had chopped off his long locks for a shorter hair do. It seemed fitting for the young adult look that he had been trying to pull off lately.

But he still had his high school charm on him, the one that you could not get away from no matter how hard he tried. “Hey... you?!” He looked over at you with a confused expression on his face, noticing that you looked so familiar to him yet he could not place how he had known you. He was just as forgetful as you remembered him to be. “Uh... do I know you from somewhere?”

You raised your eyebrow at him slightly. “You... do???” You swallowed your own drool as you caught yourself staring at him and looked away for a moment, tucking a loose strand of your hair behind your ear as you avoided his eye contact.

“Has your pea brain really forgotten high school that fast, Barnes?” Natasha snickered from the driver’s seat as Steve got in the car, buckling up as he turned around to notice you sitting behind him.

“Y/N Y/L/N?” He gave you a look of surprise, but smiled genuinely happy to see you. “Long time.”

“Hi Steve.” You smiled at him before waving slightly, your eyes darting back to the confused former classmate of yours who had finally managed to recognize you as his former algebra tutor. “I hope you don’t mind me crashing your trip, by the way. Natasha invited me and I couldn’t say no.”

“Y/N?! Oh my God... Scholar Y/N, how could I forget these glasses?” Bucky laughed as he pulled you into a side hug. “It’s been so long, oh my God! How have you been, doll?”

You bit down your bottom lip as you felt yourself blush, slightly taken aback by his rather forward attempt for a reunion hug. “Uh... yeah, I... I’ve been alright.” You did not know what to say as you pushed your glasses up your nose, giggling slightly as you pulled back from him quickly but not as awkwardly as you had feared.

“Jeez, we used to flip a coin to see which one of us gets to sit next to you when we had exams.” Steve recalled with a chuckle as Natasha started the car.

“What? Why?”

“Because whoever won the toss and sat next to you was guaranteed to pass the exam!” Bucky replied, laughing as he shook his head. “You were such a nerd back then, doll.”

“I still am.” You admitted, proudly as you laughed and gave him a playful eye roll. “I take it you’re still skipping class and roaming the town with your camera?” You remembered that Bucky Barnes had a knack for photography, having been involved with the yearbook committee and the school newspaper for multiple years. You had worked closely with him when you had been the editor of the school newspaper during your senior year, so it was not as awkward being in the presence of these three. Thankfully, they were not absolute strangers to you.

“Yeah, I... I’ve been interning with a studio though. Photography is my calling.” He told you as he motioned towards his camera bag next to you. He never left the house without it and he was hoping to document as much of this trip as he possibly could. After all, this was going to be the last trip he was going to take with his friends and neither of them knew that yet.

“So, you still have no plans for going to college then?” You asked him. You remembered that Bucky had initially decided to take a gap year and go traveling after your class had graduated from high school. As Natasha had told you during your drive over to pick up the boys, it turned out that he had not managed to go back to school when he had returned from his trip to Italy.

Bucky bit down on his bottom lip before letting out a sigh. “Not for now...” He told you with a shrug, but it was a partial lie. After all, he had received his acceptance letter for a Journalism and Media Degree in London earlier this month. But he had chosen not to break the news to his friends just yet.

“We’ve actually been saving up our money, Y/N. We’re going to open our own bar in Williamsburg and be business partners, isn’t that right, Buck?” Steve clarified.

He looked up at his best friend with a small smile, but did not nod his head. Unbeknownst to you, the reason behind his silence would eventually cause a drift between all of you by the time this trip came to an end.

Present Day...

When you and Natasha woke up the next morning, the two of you headed out to mail out the wedding invitations that the two of you had finished packing up the night before. Your best friend turned sister-in-law made it her mission to personally deliver Steve Rogers’ invitation to him, just to make sure that he knew that he had no choice but to attend the wedding. With his current financial situation though, the two of you were sure that he would do anything to avoid the wedding. But Nat was not going to have any of it.

You should not have been so surprise to have walked into an empty restaurant, but you could not help but feel slightly bad about how your friend’s business had taken the turn for the worst. You knew that this was not what Steve had signed up for when he had first purchased this restaurant with all of his savings, but he had kept it going for as long as he could.

Natasha blamed his recent increase in alcohol consumption for his failing business, but you knew that there was more to Steve’s pain that he had resorted to drinking as a coping mechanism. Perhaps, this intervention was a much needed one.

“Ladies...” Steve laughed as he walked out of the kitchen with a cold glass of whiskey in his hand. “To what do I owe this pleasure?”

“Steve, it’s 10 am... what the fuck are you doing, getting drunk this early in the morning?! Give me that glass!” Natasha walked up to him and tried to take his glass from him, only to fail miserably.

“I’m a grown ass man, Nat. I can do whatever the fuck I want...” He muttered carelessly before downing his drink and setting down his glass. “Always goes down easy.”

“Steve...” You sighed as you walked up to him, your lips curling into a frown as you pulled him into a hug. “Steve, come on... I know the restaurant is in a lot of debt right now but drinking your ass off is not going to solve that.”  

“Don’t tell me what to do, doctor.” He chuckled as he hugged you back. “If I drink myself all the way to cirrhosis, then that’s my fucking choice.”

“I don’t like what I’m hearing, Rogers.” You admitted, shaking your head at his words. “You’re struggling, buddy. Just admit that you need help and we’re more than happy to throw in a little investment, just to get this place back up and running like it did when it first opened. We hate seeing you like this, you know?”

“No...” He shook his head as he sighed. “I can’t do that, Y/N. You guys... have your own lives and your own shit to worry about. Don’t... waste your time and energy being worried about me or my business.”

“But we are worried about you, you asshole.” Natasha admitted, joining in on the hug. “I’m getting married and I hate that my best friend is... fucking miserable. I hate to see you like this. If you won’t even let us pitch in to keep this place going, then at least stop drinking your days away. The last thing I want is for you to leave me for good like he did. I’ve lost one of you already the way that I did... I can’t lose another friend either.”

“Don’t bring him up, please. I don’t want to talk about him.”

You shook your head at Natasha before you sighed, rubbing Steve’s back as you bit back your tears. “Fine, we don’t have to talk about anything... or anyone. But we have a wedding to get ready for. So, can we at least focus on that for the next few weeks?”

“Fine.” Steve admitted, finally forcing himself to smile a genuine smile. “Anything for my two favorite ladies and you becoming family.”

[phoenotopia]

2019 December Update

The game is officially playable from beginning to end!

That battle has concluded...

Soon begins the war! But first, a brief reprieve for the holidays.

And I must throw in the usual caveats. We're still playtesting, we're still polishing, we still gotta get age ratings, more red tape, etc etc. And most importantly, we need to figure out the launch strategy. Think Megaman, charging his shot for 5 and a half years... We're not allowed to miss at this point. It has to HIT.

Luckily, we're in a relatively stable position where we don't have to rush the game out immediately. It's not LAUNCH or STARVE - it's... take some time to aim a little. We don't want to launch in the shadow of a bigger behemoth game, and we don't want to launch completely unknown either. We have to build up the game's media presence, which has been neglected so far. I know it's annoying to have to continue to wait... but please bear with us a little longer!

Here's what we've been doing for the past couple months.

---------- THE SCRIPT ----------

The script sits at over 80,000 words. I didn't realize the significance until a teammate told me that that's actually as long as a novel! I looked it up, and sure enough, it's a little longer than the first Harry Potter. But unlike Harry Potter, hardly any of these words are wasted on, pffft, narration. It's all juicy dialogue!

(Some of the game's golden nuggets of dialogue)

There was actually a lot of mundanity getting to the end. Pirate, acting as my editor, caught tons of errors and inconsistencies. One of the most recurring issues had to do with capitalization. I like to capitalize things, often inconsistently. Some common questions that arose:

Why is this text highlighted yellow, and this one highlighted blue?

Why is this monster name capitalized, but this monster not?

Why is this item capitalized, and this one not?

... and so on!

All very mundane issues, but all very necessary to tackle. And there was a TON of 'em. (em vs 'em was another thing we had to make consistent). I actually did some research to see what capitalization rules Zelda had. From what I could tell, when it comes to animals and monsters in the Zelda universe:

All monsters are capitalized

All regular animals are not capitalized

The Cuccos are special, and ARE capitalized

(a collage of Zelda pictures I assembled to study)

In the Zelda universe, all regular items are lowercase, but highlighted blue when mentioned in a quest context (e.g. "butter", "hylian wheat"). Items can be uppercase, if they are special named items (e.g. "Sheikah Slate"). We adopted similar rules as Zelda in some cases, and deviated in others. For instance, in the Phoenotopia universe, there isn't a clear distinction between animals and monsters - that fish monster is really just an animal that happens to be the alpha predator in its natural habitat. So most entities are lowercase, but "big deal" entities can be uppercase.

(we made a formal document to consult whenever a question regarding capitalization arises)

---------- A SAMPLING of QUEST AND CHARACTERS ----------

A lot of new quests have arisen in our great writing effort extending over the past several months. And with it, new characters, big and small. I'll tease a sampling of some of them here (warning: some light spoilers ahead):

My favorite new quest is undoubtedly our game's new "Trading Quest". This one takes inspiration from the Zelda series - the trading quest similarly has you roaming the world and its towns in search of needy people who desire a particular item. Deliver them the item they desire, and get a new item. Do this 10 times, and the ultimate weapon awaits you at the end.

I tried some things to vary up the formula. Some NPCs don't reveal what they need right away - steps have to be taken to get them there. It's also possible to go down the wrong route in the sequence, and have to double-back. We try to keep it interesting.

---------- LOOT PLACEMENTS & GAME BALANCING ----------

A great effort was also spent towards balancing the game this past 2 months. Because even one good healing item, easily obtained, can throw the game's whole difficulty off-kilter. And this same principle applies to other areas, like the money economy and player powerup options. Altogether, they form a very delicate ecosystem for enjoyment.

One of the recent things I did for this game was put down exactly where each heart ruby, energy gem, and moonstone could be found. And this was actually a rather involved process because you have a limited number of rewards to distribute (you wouldn't want the final max HP count to be a weird number like 297). Put too many rewards in the beginning, and the late dungeons would have no rewards to offer. Put too much in the end, and the inverse happens.

I found myself going back into earlier areas and plundering their rewards to fill the later areas. And then to ensure a relatively even spread of rewards within each area themselves, I drew crude maps of the dungeons & their reward spots, so that they could be studied from a bird's eye perspective.

But it was still not enough. With NPC quests and towns also taking up their own allotment of the rewards, I found myself running low on things to distribute. So I went back to the books and upped the number of rewards across the board. Before there were 44 Heart Rubies to collect - there are now 55. Before each Heart Ruby boosted your max HP by 5, but now each one now boosts your max HP by 4, so your final max HP count would still end up the same. It's kinda similar to what happened with Twilight Princess, where they broke with tradition and made 5 heart containers required to gain a new heart instead of the usual 4. Overall, the final tally for treasure to find is:

55 heart pieces

30 energy gems

108 moon stones

Who's crazy enough to collect them all?

---------- BADGES / ACHIEVEMENTS ----------

As one of the game's finishing touches, there's a menu for BADGES - they're this game's version of achievements. This is an ongoing task that we hope to stamp out this December. A few favorites of mine from the original flash game will return ("Pillow Connoisseur" is among them).

(The menu looks like this before any badges are earned)

I allocated slots for just 33 badges, so we're selecting the badges very carefully. We got rid of most of the fluffy ones that appeared in the flash game - we wanted to reduce the number of badges that you would earn automatically for just playing the game (so no more "1st boss", "2nd boss", "3rd boss" achievements). We're aiming for a healthy mix of easily earned badges, hard earned badges, collectathon badges, secret fun badges, and so on.

The badges have another twist - they bear miniaturized portraits of characters from the game! In the initial brainstorm mockup phase, I wasn't really fond of the badge designs. You got a medal of a heart because you collected some hearts, and you got the medal of a moonstone for collecting moonstones, etc. It just seemed so... expected.

(various badge mockups)

How could we engage the players on a more fun and deep level? The idea came - what if we attached pictures of the people you meet on your journey? And these people's stories and character would have a connection with the achievement? That could keep the player guessing which character would come attached with an achievement, or even reveal a hidden detail about the character you didn't know.

---------- MUSIC ----------

Will has just one more task to do. And that's to recut the song for the trailer. One of our other goals for this December is to make a really good trailer... again. There's actually 2 other trailers we cut and never made public for reasons. Maybe I'll talk about them one day in the post-mortem.

Since this may be the last conventional update, we wondered with which song to best leave the audience. And we decided that the most suitable song is "Sanctuary". It's a song that the player will often encounter often when they happen upon a quiet resting place in the world.

There's a little story behind this song. Two and a half years ago, I linked Will the Earthbound song, "Buzz buzz's prophecy", and told him, make a song like that!

In response, Will made "Sanctuary".

Give it a listen HERE. What do you think? Did Will hit close to the greats?

---------- FAN ART ----------

Three fan arts have come in the last couple months. I display them here proudly:

Another submission by Cody G! Gale looking shy as she flashes the V sign for the camera. I like how Cody G's art is continually evolving. Note the additional detail on her eye, and how her hair is drawn extra fluffy. Very nice!

Shafiyahh is another consistent contributor, and made one in the spirit of Halloween. I really like their costumes! Gale as an angel, and Lisa as a demon, fittingly captures their relationship, since Gale is the responsible one and Lisa is the troublemaker. So cute!

A contribution from a new artist, Negativus Core! Wow, Gale looks so bada-- here! We often forget about Gale's tough side due to the cutesy graphics. This is probably how her enemies see her. And the gummy (slime) is a cute touch!

---------- FINAL NOTES ----------

Similar to last year, this will be the last update for a while. If things run too slow, I'll post a status update come end of February 2020.

It's possible, and this is a BIG IF, that something notable happens sooner than expected - like we're going to a con or we have reason to drop the trailer sooner than later. If so, this blog will update earlier than expected. BIG IF. Otherwise, it's end of February till next you hear of us.

The game's development has reached a new uncharted territory. We're going to take the time and figure out exactly what our next steps are. In addition, we'll still be doing some playtesting and script polishing. And we'll be taking a break too. It is the holiday season, things move kind of slow around this time of year. We'll enjoy the company of our family and friends.

Until then, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

[theazkabandreamer]

Of Christmas Dinners and New Friends

Another one of my old works that I haven’t posted to Tumblr.

____

The Fireplace in the empty Gryffindor Common Room crackled merrily as snow fell outside. But Lily Evans wasn't in a festive mood. For the first time since she started Hogwarts, despite the increased workload that Sixth years have to endure, despite the fact that it felt like she was studying for exams every day, she dreaded going home.

Her Sister, Petunia had gotten herself a boyfriend and she was bound to be insufferably smug at Christmas Dinner. Lily knew that she would have to endure taunts from her, claiming that no normal man would ever want to be with a freak like her. Lily hoped that she might be able to make things up with Petunia, but so far, she had ignored every letter that she had sent her.

What with her bad relationship with her Sister and the situation in the Wizarding World where a Pure-Blooded maniac calling himself Lord Voldemort was steadily gaining power, Lily thought that she was going to be in for a truly miserable Christmas.

She was still shaken by the news about a Muggle massacre about seven miles from Cokeworth. She had promptly Owled her parents to see if they were alright and got a reply to say that they were fine. She was relived but still shocked that the Death Eaters struck so close to home.

'What if they had been killed?' She thought miserably. The fighting was getting far more intense lately and she had eighteen months left at Hogwarts. She briefly considered teaching and asked Professor Slughorn if she could stay on and help him teach Potions, but he turned her down.

"Now, Lily" He had laughed, wagging a sugar coated finger. "You're still young. There are far more exciting things in life then teaching Potions in a stuffy Dungeon. Why don't you get out there and enjoy life's wonders before putting your neck on the block, so to speak. Dumbledore's not too keen on students becoming teachers right after they leave school. I've got some excellent contacts in the Potions industry. I could arrange you a meeting with them. With brains like yours, you could go far! Why you even give Severus a run for his money!"

Severus. She had not spoken to him since he called her a Mudblood by the Lake, last June. He had been drifting away from her and getting more and more involved in the Dark Arts with his Slytherin friends.

Despite him begging her for her forgiveness, she had turned him down. 'He made his choice and I made mine. If he wants to run around with his Death Eater pals, then I'm not going to stop him." She thought firmly. But her heart still ached for her first friend. Her friend that introduced her to the Wizarding World. 'Don't start feeling guilty!' She reminded herself. 'His friends are evil and he would sooner wash his hair then change his ways.'

All in all, it was a truly rotten Christmas.

Lily put down her Charms book after spending hours looking at it and not taking in the words. She shouldn't be doing any studying, anyway. Not when it was only a couple of days before the Christmas Holidays.

Lily heard the Portrait open and someone stumbling through it, muttering under their breath. She looked around to see a soaking, dripping wet James Potter on the threshold, glasses askew. He shook himself and made his way towards the fireplace.

Lily tensed. James Potter was the last person that she wanted to see tonight. Potter was the reason why she wasn't talking to Severus. If it wasn't for Potter and his idiot pals, Severus wouldn't have called her a Mudblood. 'Although I shouldn't be too hard on Potter.' She thought. 'Severus was already getting bad before Potter humiliated him at the Lake.'

Lily had refused to even look at Potter after that. She happily ignored him all year and he seemed to have taken the hint. He even stopped asking her out on dates. Although, she missed screaming at him.

Potter stopped by the fireplace and proceeded to warm himself. He didn't even notice Lily sitting there, lost in her thoughts. But Lily was soon jerked out of them as he blocked the fire, trying to dry himself. She noticed that he was wearing his Quidditch robes.

"Do you have to do that?!" She snapped.

Potter jumped, accidentally causing some ash to fall on the rug.

"I didn't see you there." He said guiltily.

"No wonder you wear glasses." She remarked waspishly.

Potter gave her a sheepish grin, far different from his usual cocky one.

"It's rather wet, that stuff," He remarked airily. "The snow."

"You don't say?" Lily spat sarcastically. Potter looked even more sheepish, to her delight. 'Serves him right for thinking he could just barge in!' She thought savagely.

Potter gave her another sheepish smile and just stood there, dripping wet and looking rather pathetic. Lily felt something in her stomach that she finally understood to be pity. She was feeling sorry for Potter. She withdrew her wand and Potter looked at it with apprehension.

"Here," She said shortly and gave it a little flick. A jet of hot air shot out of it, instantly drying Potter so that he wasn't dripping wet. Potter sighed in relief.

"Lily! You're a lifesaver!" He said weakly.

"I didn't do it for you!" She snapped defensively, dimly noting that he addressed her by her first name. "I did it because I don't want to be soaking wet, thank you very much."

"All the same, thank you!" Potter said gratefully.

Lily was taken aback. Since when did James Potter ever thank anybody?

"You're welcome?" Lily said uncertainly. Thinking Potter would change his mind and say that it was a joke.

Lily looked out of the window and watched the falling snow. Potter just stood there, looking sheepish and uncertain and so unlike his usual self. She was about to tell Potter to go away before his spoke.

"Is it alright with you if I sit down?" He asked politely. "I'm still quite cold."

"If you must." Lily said coldly.

Potter smiled at her again before sitting down on the other end of the Sofa. Lily didn't mind him being here. Truth be told, she was feeling quite lonely, lately. She didn't mind having a bit of company. Even if it was Potter.

Lily didn't have much energy to read her Charms book, so she just stared into the flickering flames. Mind spinning and dreading going home.

Potter just sat there, warming his hands and occasionally glancing her. Lily was enjoying the silence, when he spoke.

"It's beautiful, isn't it? The Snow?"

Lily nodded. She didn't feel like speaking at the moment. She had no energy for it.

"I was just going for a Broom ride. Clear my head, you know." Potter was saying.

Something finally seemed to work in Lily's brain.

"So that's why you were late." She said. "Black, Lupin and Pettigrew went up to bed an hour ago and the rest of the Quidditch team came back an hour ago, as well."

"I had a lot on my mind." Potter said seriously. Lily frowned at him.

"Who are you, and what have you done with James Potter?" She asked suspiciously.

Potter laughed and jerked his right arm as if he were going to run a hand through his hair but thought better of it.

"It's hard to believe," He said slowly. "That we're already Sixth Years. I mean we've got eighteen months before we graduate and that's it. We have to go out there and face it."

"I know." Lily admitted in a small voice. "It's quite daunting."

Lily wondered whether or not she should tell Potter about her fears. She had been bottling them up for a while now. Potter seemed to be quite serious, right now. Not his usual arrogant self.

"I asked Slughorn whether or not I could teach Potions with him after I leave Hogwarts," She confessed. Feeling relieved that she was getting it off her chest. "He told me to get out there and enjoy life."

"So he should." Potter said. "You're a brilliant Witch, Lily. But you have a lot more to offer then just teaching Potions. With brains like yours, you could go far. I think you could even invent a cure for lycanthropy. You've got the potential for it."

Lily gave him a small smile, touched by his words. This wasn't the same arrogant Potter that used to hex everybody he could. Was it possible that he had changed since she last spoke to him? At any rate, she felt that she could at least confide in him.

"I've been a bit worried lately." She told him "You know about that Death Eater attack at Ironminster? Well that's just Seven miles from where I live. My Mum likes to go the Market, there."

Potter's face whitened. "That's too close." He muttered. "Is your Mum alright?" He asked after a moments pause.

"Oh, yes. They're fine. My Mum and Dad. They thought that it was a gas explosion or something. I had written to them after I heard the news and I got a reply back, saying that they were fine."

Potter exhaled in relief. "That's good. I wouldn't want anything to happen to you or your parents."

Lily smiled at him again, astounded that he was being mature. But she stared at the fire again, feeling glum. Potter seemed to notice.

"Are you okay, Lily?" He asked softly. "You seem rather down."

Lily thought for a moment. Should she tell Potter about her private life? He had been quite mature tonight. A side of him that she hadn't seen before and a side that she quite liked. She decided that it wasn't something that she should bottle up. So she took a breath.

"Not really." She said in a flat tone. "Something's been bothering me, actually." She told him all about Petunia. How Petunia wasn't answering her letters. Petunia's loathing of Magic, Petunia's Boyfriend.

"And now she seems to be dating what looks likes this bad tempered Aberdeen Angus. I haven't' even met the man but I just know that at Christmas Dinner, she's going to rub it in!" It felt good, getting it off her chest. Talking to someone about it. Potter was a good listener.

"That's terrible." He said sympathetically.

"It's ever since I received my Hogwarts letter and she didn't." Lily burst out. "She even wrote to Professor Dumbledore, begging him to let her go. But that didn't work and she's been jealous of me ever since."

"That's no reason to call you a freak." Potter said reasonably.

"I know." Lily sighed. "I've been trying and trying to make things up with her, but she seems determined to pretend that I don't exist. I don't know why I bother, sometimes."

"Keep trying." Potter insisted. "You'll regret it if you don't. She's family, isn't she? My parents taught me that family should stick together."

"That's all very well." Lily said. "But when she claims that I'm abnormal, just because I'm a Witch… It just makes me so miserable sometimes."

"Don't give up." Potter said. "Look, I don't have a sibling. Sirius, Remus and Peter are the closest things to brothers that I'll ever have. But the point is, that if you make an effort, then somewhere down the line, Petunia would probably take notice and respond and even if she sends you a horrible present, wouldn't that be a start? "

Lily gave him another small smile.

"Yeah. Maybe." She said quietly. "Things would've been better though if it wasn't for Severus." She spat out his name as if it were poison and Potter tensed.

There was a moments awkward silence as the tension became thick. Potter seemed to be trying to speak. He seemed to finally manage it.

"L-Lily. I just want to say that I'm really sorry. You know. At that day by the Lake. He was your friend, wasn't he? Snape?"

"He was the one who told me what I was." Lily muttered, staring into the dancing flames. "Petunia never liked him."

"You were right." Potter was saying. "I was a bigheaded, conceited, bullying git."

"You've got that right!" Lily snapped, firing up. "Hexing people in the corridors, ruffling up your hair, thinking you're superior to everyone, just because you play Quidditch! It makes me sick!"

"I know." Potter said solemnly and he actually had the decency to look ashamed as well. "But I've been trying, you know. Not to be a big headed, arrogant toerag."

Lily smiled at the label he give himself, recognising that it was the one that she used to frequently give him.

"Well, you haven't asked me out at all, this year." She said slowly.

Potter muttered something about thinking she wouldn't want that.

Lily fell silent again. The need to discuss Severus was welling up inside her. Potter had been quite mature, lately. He had even apologised for his behaviour. How would he react if she brought Severus up again?

"He was getting worse." Lily said abruptly. "Severus. Before you…Before the Lake."

"He was your friend, wasn't he?" Potter asked tentatively.

Lily gave a hollow laugh. "He used to be my best friend." Lily said bitterly. "But ever since he got in with that Slytherin lot, we've been drifting apart! But I've been making excuses for him, for years!"

"He doesn't deserve you." Potter said quietly. "You are the kindest, bravest, most wonderful person that I've ever met. You touch people's lives in ways you can't imagine. Snape doesn't deserve someone like you. If he really was your friend, he wouldn't have called you….That…word."

"Mudblood." Lily said tonelessly. Potter winced.

"Yeah. That." He said darkly.

"He calls everyone of my birth, Mudblood." Lily said. "Why should I be any different? He's a bit of a hypocrite, anyway." She added with another hollow laugh.

"His Dad's a Muggle and here he is, acting all holier then thou. It doesn't matter, anyway. He made his choice and I made mine. As far as I'm concerned, I've washed my hands of him."

"They're loonies, those Blood Purists." Potter said wisely. "So what if you're Muggle born? You're just as good as anyone else. You're really good at Magic. I love watching you in Charms. You really shine you know. When you cast spells."

"Thanks." Lily smiled, touched by his words and pleased that she was able to get the large weight of anxiety off her chest. Thinking that it would be a little rude not to compliment him back, she added.

"You're very good at Transfiguration. You make it look easy."

"It is easy." Potter grinned. Not his usual cocky grin, but a genuine grin that seemed to enhance his features and make him look warmer. "I could help you sometime, if you're struggling."

Lily smiled at him before returning to look at the fire. A thought occurred to her. Something that often came to her when Potter and his friends played pranks on people. Something that was far different then anything that Severus or his Slytherin friends.

"You don't use Dark Magic, do you?" She asked Potter. Potter's face darkened as he answered.

"I hate the Dark Arts." He muttered. "Always have."

"You're not evil, though. Like Mulciber and Avery. Some of the things you do, are actually quite funny."

"I don't see us as evil," Potter said slowly and thoughtfully. "I see us as Purveyors of Magical Mischief."

Despite herself, Lily burst out laughing at Potter's name for him and his friends. Potter watched her is awe, before joining in.

"You're laughing." Potter noted softly. A genuine smile on his face that seemed to light up his hazel eyes.

"You know, you four should open up a Joke Shop when we leave Hogwarts." She told him after she calmed down. " It could be called..um.. What are those names you call yourselves? Hang on. Oh yeah: Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs: Purveyors of Magical Mischief."

"Oh Merlin!" Potter snorted before he burst out laughing as well.

"I can't imagine Sirius working in a shop. He'd be slacking off with me. Peter would probably mess everything up and poor Remus would be doing all the work. I think we should leave the Joke Shop thing to the next generation of Mischief makers."

"You'd be really good at it." Lily insisted.

"I don't think it would be the right time for it, though." Potter said seriously. "What with the war going on. Doesn't mean we're going to stop laughing for that. Life's too short. You never know, we could be dead in ten years time."

Lily shivered, feeling a great sense of forbidding at his words.

"Don't say that." She said in a small voice. Potter looked guilty and scooted closer to her.

"Sorry." He said sheepishly. "Forget the war, though. It'll soon be Christmas. Merry Christmas, Lily."

Lily smiled at him again. "Merry Christmas, James." She said. James felt far more softer then Potter. A name that she often spat out with anger and venom. James suited the person before her. The person who helped cheer her up and offer her words on comfort.

"You called me James." James smiled. Hazel eyes twinkling in the firelight.

"I've noticed you stopped calling me Evans." Lily replied.

"Cracker?" James asked suddenly.

"I think you are quite crackers." She smiled. James laughed.

"Nah. Sirius is the one who's crackers. I'm the sane one."

"You wish!" Lily snorted.

James took out his wand and conjured a Wizarding Cracker.

"Here." He said, offering her one end. She took it and together they pulled. The Cracker let out an almighty bang, before several live, white rats came scuttling out of it and went through a crack in the wall.

"That's a shame. Peter would've liked to have had one of those. He's always had a soft spot for rats." James quipped. Lily laughed again.

"Thank you." She said to him. "I was feeling utterly miserable before you came in, but you did a surprisingly great job of cheering me up. And you seem so mature as well. It's amazing."

James shrugged. "You were right." He said. "I was big headed. I want us to be friends, Lily so I changed. For you."

Lily sat there, stunned that James Potter would have done such a thing for her.

"That's the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me." She breathed. James looked delighted.

"I do want to be your friend. It's been really great chatting with you, tonight and I'm glad that you were here so I could get these things off my chest. I can't thank you enough."

The next thing she knew, she was hugging James and James seemed to be at a loss for words. He patted her back.

"I'd do anything you for you." He said. Lily pulled out of the hug to look at him.

"Like I said, you touch people's lives in ways that you can't imagine. I hate seeing you sad and I hate the fact that I might have been the one to have made you sad."

"Being mature really suits you." Lily told him. "I'd like to see more of that."

"I can try." James told her. "Think about what I said about your Sister, though. Keep trying. Because, I've got the feeling that one day, you're going to be very thankful that you have a Sister."

Lily shivered again, despite the fire. But she no longer dreaded Christmas day. James was right. She should keep trying. Maybe one day, she would be pleased that Petunia Evans is her Sister but at this very moment, nothing. Not even the impending Christmas Dinner would puncture her happiness of having a new friend.

[lost-n-stereo]

A/N: Nabrina Prompt #18 ��Did i ever tell you how beautiful your eyes are?”

and I keep waiting (but I won’t say I’m waiting)

They say time heals all wounds.

That would be great if she wasn’t practically immortal, in an odd limbo where her body is barely changing but her friends are growing up and moving on.

You would think that it would hurt less as the days go by, since it’s been nearly two years since Nick sacrificed himself for the greater good and Lilith took him to hell. Except, he didn’t sacrifice himself for the greater good, he sacrificed himself for her. And that makes it a hell of a lot tougher to let go.

The first few months were the worst, when it was still fresh, always there in the back of her mind that he was possibly suffering in hell because of her. She took solace in Lilith’s promise to watch over him but it didn’t keep her from imagining horrible scenarios of torture and pain.

The Fright Club met often, dreaming up ways to go into hell to rescue Nick. They plotted ways to get Lucifer out of his body, searched tomes and spell books for clues or incantations, but always came up just a little too short.

Things changed within their friend group gradually over the last two years of mortal high school. Theo started dating a sweet girl from Riverdale and started spending less time with them. Roz and Harvey took a break in their junior year, in which time Sabrina and Harvey gave it another shot. They soon realized their mistake, that their love was one based in their past, and it wasn’t long before Harvey and Roz were back together for good.

Sabrina wasn’t waiting for Nick, exactly, but she always had him in the back of her mind. And always in her heart. She went on dates with nice boys, mortal and warlock alike, but never felt the connection she’d had with him.

“Tell me again why I decided to go to school all the way across the state,” Roz says, her voice pulling Sabrina out of her mind and back into the room her best friend is currently packing up.

“Because it’s fun and exciting,” Sabrina says, shaking off her inner monologue, as she grabs a pink stuffed bunny off of Roz’s nightstand. “Are you taking Mr. Wiggles with you?”

Roz laughs. “I’m eighteen now. Do I really need to bring my childhood toys with me to college?” She nibbles on her bottom lip and both girls speak at the same time.

“Yes.”

Sabrina giggles and sets the bunny on an already packed suitcase. “I think he’ll fit right in. Are the boys still meeting us at the diner before you head out?”

“Yeah, Theo said they would meet us around five.”

It’s been a summer full of the four of them, which isn’t to say it’s been much different than every summer since before she could remember.

Summer always comes with an expiration date. The days are long and warm, afternoons spent in Sweetwater River playing and splashing around with the kids from across the water and nights spent at bonfires and house parties. Fall is always a surprise no matter how much you’re prepared for it. She used to wait all summer long for autumn to hit. It meant her favorite season, her birthday and all the fun witchy holidays that she loved so much.

Now it’s just a reminder that high school is over and everyone is going their separate ways.

“I can’t believe I’m going to be all alone here for awhile,” Sabrina says wistfully. “Greendale won’t be the same without you guys.”

Roz stops packing, drops the dress she was holding into the open suitcase in front of her without folding it, and curls up on her bed with Sabrina. “You have so many responsibilities at the academy, time is going to fly by and before you know it, it’ll be Christmas break.”

“Winter solstice,” Sabrina amends and they both laugh. “You’re right. I’m just going to miss you all so much.”

They hug and Roz gives a watery laugh as she pulls away. “Okay, no more crying. We’re going to go have fun and we won’t be saying goodbye tonight. Just a ‘see you soon’.”

Sabrina nods and stands, wiping the corner of her eye with her thumb. “You’re right. Let’s get you packed up. You’ve got a long car ride ahead of you in the morning.”

*** The sun is shining high and bright when she wakes up the next day.

A look at her bedside clock tells her that it’s after nine, which means Roz and Harvey are already on the road and headed to their new school. Sabrina wasn’t surprised when Harvey told her months ago that he was applying to the same school as his girlfriend. Their relationship was built to last and it made her happy knowing they would have each other living so far from home. Theo wasn’t going far, only a short two hour drive away, so Sabrina knew she’d see him more often than the others.

She tried not to think about how she was losing her mortal friends to the real world. Instead, she decided to focus her attention to her non-mortal side and all of the people she still had here at home.

When Father Blackwood took off the Church of Night was left with only a handful of people, not many students at all. But with Aunt Zelda becoming High Priestess it brought forth a whole new group of witches and warlocks that were eager to study under her new leadership.

“Sabrina!”

Speaking of Aunt Zelda…

“I’m up!” She calls, popping up out of bed refreshed and ready to begin the next chapter of her life. Salem meows from his window perch and Sabrina smiles, scratches him on the head behind his ears the way she knows he likes. “You may not be a real cat, Salem. But you sure do purr like one.”

Twenty minutes later they are on their way to the academy, with Aunt Hilda and Ambrose in tow. Rebuilding the Church of Night was a family effort, one that Sabrina has not yet lived full time because of her dedication to finishing mortal high school. Now, she can not only help her family in their quest to make the church one that is wholly inclusive and thriving, but she can finish her dark arts studies without having to juggle her mortal ones.

“Conjuring today, eh Sabrina?” Ambrose asks as they walk through the doors of Gehenna Station. After passing all of her general courses last semester she’s finally able, and more than ready, to start her conjuring training.

In reality, she doesn’t need schooling or classes or spells, even. Learning you’re the daughter of Lucifer Morningstar, with power most witches and warlocks can only imagine, was difficult to come to terms with. She decided that she wouldn’t use those powers unless absolutely necessary and instead sticks to the magic used by everyone else.

“I’m excited,” she says as they pass the new sculpture in the center of the room, Lilith in her true form, beauty and power emanating from the carved stone. “Conjuring was always Nick’s favorite...”

Ambrose frowns when he sees Sabrina’s face fall. “I’m sorry, cousin. I know it doesn’t get any easier. But one day, maybe…”

“It’s a big maybe, Ambrose,” she says sadly. “Plus, there’s no use thinking about it constantly. Thinking about it changes nothing. I’m going to focus on what is happening in the here and now.”

“Good on you, Sabrina.” Aunt Zelda steps up beside her and looks up at the statue of Lilith. “I’m sure the Queen of Hell is watching over your young warlock as we speak. She knows how important he was to you.”

“Is,” Sabrina corrects gently. “How important he is to me.”

***

August turns into September and then into October with little fanfare.

She keeps in touch with Harvey, Roz and Theo over group chats and Skype sessions. There are tentative plans for Halloween, also known as her birthday, but she knows there are no guarantees when it comes to long distance friendships. They have mortal responsibilities that she just doesn’t have any more.

Besides, even if her eighteenth birthday is spent with just her aunties and Ambrose, it will still be fun.

“I love this weather,” Sabrina says to Ambrose as they walk through the woods on their way home from the academy. “The sky looks like it could crack open at any time. I can’t wait for the rain to begin.”

“Agree completely, cousin. All feels right in the world when it’s dark and gloomy.”

Sabrina kicks a small rock out of the way of the path with the toe of her boot. “How’s Prudence? Have you spoken with her?”

Ambrose shrugs and offers a small smile. “Still on the hunt for her father, o’course. I wish I could be out there with her but…”

“But Aunt Zelda needed you,” Sabrina finishes for him and he nods.

“She’s a strong girl, that one. I know she’ll find him and when she does…I’ll be there to help take him down.”

It’s been strange being at the academy without Prudence, especially considering two thirds of the Weird Sisters are still attending students. Dorcas and Agatha have been unlikely friends, although Sabrina thinks sometimes it’s her heritage they admire in her and not her personality.

Still, it’s nice to have friends.

“So what’s the big plan for your birthday this year, cuz? Your friends making the trip?”

Sabrina sighs. “I’m honestly not sure. They are so busy with school and the distance is a lot. I’m hopeful but won’t be disappointed if they can’t make it.”

“Very mature of you,” he says with a grin and she smacks him on the arm.

“Well I am almost an adult.”

Ambrose snorts, winds his arm through Sabrina’s and leads her towards their house.

“Trust me, cousin. You’re nowhere near an adult. Now your 118th birthday? That’s when the real fun begins.”

***

A knock on the front door wakes her up at 12:03 am on October 31st.

“Can’t even get a good night’s sleep the night before my birthday,” she mumbles as she climbs out of bed, slipping into a robe and a pair of slippers to save her bare feet from the cold wood floor.

No one else in the house woke up to the knock, which surprises her not at all. Her family sleeps like the dead most of the time and the knock isn’t particularly loud or demanding. In fact, she’s shocked that she heard it at all.

It doesn’t occur to her to maybe be wary of a knock sounding at midnight. There could be an untold number of dangers awaiting her on the other side but she doesn’t feel fearful at all.

Nothing can prepare her for what’s actually on the other side of the door.

“Happy Birthday, Spellman.”

Sabrina’s breath catches in her throat and she’s scared this is some kind of trick. An evil manipulation, perhaps, although she has no current enemies that she can think of. Except Lucifer, obviously, but he’s supposed to be in hell. In Nick. Except…

“Nicholas?”

“Hello, Sabrina.”

He looks exactly the same as when she last saw him, except his eyes aren’t red with the devil inside. There are no marks or blemishes on his skin, no visible signs of torture like she was afraid of.

“How…? What…?”

Nick chuckles softly. “Two very excellent questions. Sabrina…”

Her name is barely out of his mouth when she flings herself at him, her hands coming up to touch his hair, his face, his shoulders. He’s so solid and strong and real.

“I can’t believe you’re really here,” she says, relishing the feel of his arms around her waist. “I don’t know how this is possible but I almost don’t care.”

“Lilith,” he whispers. “She found a way to contain him in Hell. I can explain it all to you but right now…”

His fingers card through her hair and she smiles against his lips when he presses them to hers.

“Your hair is longer,” he says when they pull apart. His eyes are intense when he looks down at her and she blushes.

“What?”

“Did i ever tell you how beautiful your eyes are? Because the memory of them has kept me sane for the last two years and now, looking into them…it’s like a dream come true.”

Her blood warms at his confession. “Nicholas.”

He kisses her again and she can feel in that single moment the amount of love and devotion that he has for her. Nothing that’s ever happened in her life thus far feels like this.

“I know we have a lot to talk about,” he says, his eyes downcast. “So much happened before I left and I know how angry you must be with me.”

Sabrina shakes her head, puts her hand on his cheek so he’s forced to look at her. “I was angry, Nick. But I also missed you terribly. And I know why you did what you did. It doesn’t make it easier or excuse it but I do understand.”

“I’m so sorry, Spellman.” He practically collapses into her when he hugs her again and she can actually feel the wave of exhaustion roll off of him. “I promise to make it up to you.”

“Stay here tonight,” she whispers. “Come with me.”

She holds her hand out and he takes it, bringing it up to his lips to kiss her knuckles.

There is a piece of parchment on her bed that wasn’t there before. She turns it over in her hands to see a simple line etched in black ink.

Happy Birthday Sabrina. I told you I’d take good care of him.

“What is that?” Nick asks, coming around behind her to rest his chin on her shoulder.

“A birthday present from Lilith,” she says as she leans back into him.

“The parchment?”

Sabrina laughs, turns around in his arms and brings his head down for a kiss. “No, silly. It was you.”

***

She wakes up hours later to her aunts’ surprised voices.

“Nicholas? What are you doing here?!”

“And in Sabrina’s bed, no less!”

“Aunties,” she says, pulling her blanket up around her and Nick. “I’m eighteen and my boyfriend just escaped hell. Can you cut me a little bit of a break?”

Hilda mumbles something about baking a cake and Zelda eyes Nick carefully.

“We’ll expect a full report of how exactly you’re back,” she says and Nick nods earnestly. “Well then, have a good morning you two.”

Ambrose passes by the doorway as Zelda is leaving. “Happy birthday, cousin.” He does a double take when he sees Nick. “Nicholas, good to have you back, friend.”

Nick laughs when the door closes again. “Your family is something else, Spellman.”

She turns so they are lying face to face. “I still can’t believe you’re here. In the flesh, lying next to me right now. I thought this day would never come.”

“Not me,” he says seriously. “Every single day I had to be away was just one day closer to being with you again.”

Sabrina sighs happily and lets him pull her body flush with his so he can kiss her. “Nick…what would you have done if I had, you know, moved on?”

“Cried.”  They both laugh and he drops feather light kisses to her nose, then her cheeks and forehead.  “It wouldn’t have mattered. As long as you’re safe and happy, that’s all I care about. You’re all I care about.”

He snuggles closer to her and kisses the top of her head.

“It would have really fucking sucked though.”

Sabrina laughs out loud, pulls him so he has to brace himself on both hands over her.

“Good thing for you the other boys I dated were so bland.”

Nick kisses her, presses his body down on hers a bit before sitting up with a start.

“Wait…what other boys?”

SEND ME A SHIP + PROMPT

[nothingginhton]

I have a diploma in Illustration & Design; it was a demanding program that didn't leave me alot to work. Since I had a deal with my parents that I could stay home has long has I was studying, I would only work summers and do tutoring for some extra cash. My budget was very limited and by the time I graduated, I had small debt and no job. I had started looking before getting my diploma and for a few months I kept looking with no luck. By fall, I realized that I needed a job if I wanted to start cover my part of the bills and go out with my friends. I took a part time jobs at a Michaels next to my house. I worked replenishment in the morning till 9h AM; I would be done and have the rest of the day to work on my art and look for a full time job I wanted to do. With Christmas coming, I would get alot of hours, they liked me alot so if they needed someone to stay longer, I would be the one they asked. Sadly, after Christmas, replenishment was not has busy. My hours got cut down by alot, so I started working at the cash. I had a little less time do art but I kept looking in my study domain till spring. It had been a year of searching and never even got a bite. I decided to revise my career choice. I didn't want to give up on art but I needed a more stable job, something full time so I could have enough money to start my adult life. I had been studying art since highschool so the only other career I knew how to do was my mom's (I never understood my dad's job). My mom would be the one to bring my sister and/or I at her office if there was a need to. She would give us small tasks to do when we were there, allowing us to truly understand what she did. For a long time, she was a receptionist for the physchologist department at McGill. Yes the university, they have full clinic there for the students that also includes physchologist and cancelors. They used to be more of a seperate thing at the time but today it's all regrouped into what is now call the Student Wellness Hub. My mom now works for HR but the reception job is the one that I knew the most and that's what I chose to look for. I finally started to get calls and interviews, I was hoping that by the end of summer I would finally be a full time employee and in a way that's what happened... Just not the way I thought.

Knowing my career path change, my mom had been monitoring new jobs at McGill, one of her co-workers knew about this and asked her if I would like to work part time in the laboratory. Basically, one of the services offered at the Hub, is a laboratory where student can drink of samples for testing and get blood drawn. They only had one Lab Tech and a receptionist, they were looking for second Lab Tech but the search was running long and they needed someone to cover shifts that neither the receptionist and/or lab Tech were able to covered. They wanted someone temporary that would come in at lunch time and stay for the afternoon. My mom didn't think I would interested but with Christmas coming around, I said that I could change my shift at Michaels for only replenishment again. I knew a girl that was working a second job in the afternoon and that it would not be a problem with my boss.

For a couple of months, I worked 5h to 10h AM at Michaels and then went into town to work 12h to 5h PM at the lab. I was good at the reception and scanning results part of the job because it was something I knew but I was also a fast learner; I had learned how to help out in the lab. I couldn't do any test that required blood since I was not certified to drawn blood but I could do pregnancy tests, urinalysis, rapid streps and strep culture. Besides for CBC and Mono tests, every other test were done at the hospital, so part of my job was making sure we had the right samples and the documents were correctly filled before sending it to the hospital. I had also learned how to use a Autoclave and sterilize medical instruments. Last but not least, at the end of the day, it was my job to assure that the doctors room were fully stacked and ready for the next day. The main idea was to get experience and have something to add to my CV but I started getting attached to the job. I enjoyed the staff and the work but it was also nice to learn again. Finally... They found a second Lab technician.

I started doing the cash again at Michaels and I hated it. I used to tolerate the job, I loved the staff and I thought the job was nt so bad but after doing something I really did love, it was hard to go back. I couldn't stand the shoppers anymore. They all felt like Karen's to me and I was losing patience fast. Luckily since it was still Christmas season, I was still mainly doing replenishment but that was also getting on my nerves. My back was starting to hurt and the higher bosses (who probably never step into a Michaels) we're adding for costumer service policies that were too much or getting the way of our replenishment job. Despite being a good employee, my boss was force to give me warnings for not getting enough emails. I did what I normally do when I fell sad, I got a new hair cut; I wanted something dramatic, I shaved half my head and dye the rest blue. When I changed highschool and got into the Fine Art Focus program I had tried to dye my hair white. Before starting cegep, I had cut my hair short, shave half and dye the rest pink. I think at this point, big hair changes means big changes in my life, I needed one and I got one.

I had some commissions to do in town; for one of them, I had to stop by my mom's office, while I was there, I decided to stop by the lab. I got to meet the new lab tech and everyone was happy to see me, including my boss. She asked me to her office, turn out that the lab tech they hired was a student and could only work part time. They decided that they wanted me on call, I could cover the shifts the new lab tech could not. I did a few days here and there but my Micheal scheduled, it was complicating things. On call was not working for them, so they decided to have me work afternoons again so I could change my Micheal scheduled. Not long after that, the receptionist went on sick leave.

I got new a contract, a full time one and a raise. I took a chance I never thought I would be brave enough to do; I quit Micheals. It was a risk because the new contract was temporary, I was replacing the receptionist till she came back, but I had a foot in the door and I knew that they liked me. Just before leaving for the holidays, they had decided to train me for Mask Fitting, the idea being that I could work partly for the nurses and have my full hours that way once the receptionist came back.

My hours went down after Christmas, I was only allowed 20 hours in the lab and the Mask Fitting was not enough to cover me full time. I didn't mind all that much, with my raise, I was still making alot more money than at Michaels and well, I still got to work in the lab. Only problem being that I was still working by monthly contracts. There was still I chance I could lose my job at anytime.

This is where things starts getting more chaotic... About two months ago, they had found a full time Lab Tech. The part time Lab Tech and I were going to be laid off, but then the receptionist went on sick leave again so my job was instead put back to full time. A week later the new Lab Tech pushed back her arrival to a month, so the part time Tech also got to keep her job. Forward to few weeks ago, we found out the the new Lab Tech got a job somewhere else and was not going to come in at all. Finally that bring us to last week.

Now alot of things happen; the Convid-19 had been something that had monitored for a while. Since I work in a clinic, it had a big effect on my job. The first thing was saving the supply we had. People were stealing our masks, gloves and hand sanitizer. We were running low very fast and ordering more was not a option anymore. We were not seen has a real clinic by companies and there supplies were also limited, in other words, they didn't want to sell supplies to us. We gathered everything we could find and locked it away so that we could better monitor the supply left. Since part of my job was stocking, it started to make things a bit more complicated.

Our clinic is a student service, it's not best equipped to deal with big cases. We are mainly there for general check ups or small worries. We in no ways could deal with majors case and definitely could not deal with Convid-19 possible cases. Student were warned not to come it they had symptoms and had recently traveled. They were instead given a number to call for instructions on what to do. They still decided it was prudent to have a isolation room with that they needed someone to desinfecting possibly contaminated rooms. Now sometimes it's better not to question McGill logic but some reason, they decided that it was going to be my job despite not being trained or equip to do so (which I told they multiple times).

Finally getting to last week, let's start with monday. Students had just came back from March break, some people including the Lab Tech, were worried about what that was going to mean for the clinic. They were protocols put in place and again, students were told not to come (we had large signs reminding them so at the front of the clinic) so I assure people that things should be fine... I was wrong. Protocols were not properly followed and someone who had symptoms and had recently traveled to France managed to get to her nurses appointment. She was coffin alot very loudly. The nurse room she was in was right next to the lab. Everyone started panicking, the Lab Tech desapered and the managers were furious. The nurse left crying, she didn't know what she was possibly exposing herself to till the student was coughing and questions were asked. This student should had been put in isolation when they came in. Now the hole clinic could had been exposed and we had nurse scared of going home. I want to make this clear, when we refuse service, it's not because we don't want to help, it's because we CANNOT help. No doctor, no nurse, infact no one working in the clinic wants to refuse services, but we are limited on what we can do. Being a small school clinic (has great as that is) means that there is thing we are simply not equipped to treat. We are a 8h to 4h office, the nurses and doctors work here for these reasons. It's the perfect job of you want to work in your field and still be there for your family. It comes with the insurance that that they are not being exposed to anything dangerous and they won't be asked to work overtime. Having a student come in when they shouldn't, and/or lie about the reason they come in is dangerous. Not only is the clinic not prepared to deal with them but the nurse or doctor they are about to see is not prepared either. They are putting everyone at risk and are not even going to be treated because we DO NOT have the equipment for it.

Going back to my story, I was obviously asked to clean the room, I said no.

The next day, I come in and there is no one in the Lab. My boss had been sick for few days so I was not sure if she was in, the part time Lab Tech was scheduled in the afternoon and the Lab Tech was still missing. I opened the lab has normal and sent out some emails to find out what was going on. My boss had commissions to do and was going to come I a little later and the Lab Tech was not going to come in. The day went fine, student were now force to wear masks at all time in the clinic and it wasn't my first time running the lab by myself. The part time Lab Tech was not able come in either, she was sick and couldn't even talk.

Wednesday, my boss was in the Lab when I came in, knowing that I had alot of equipment to sterilize, I asked to bring the stuff in the lab so I could multi task. By the time I came back, she was gone. I opened up the lab again and print out the results that had came in. Just has I was about to call in the first patient, my boss came in crying. Her back was hurting but she wanted to stay because there was alot to do and I was by myself. She eventually desapered again and the next time I saw her, she was being accompanied into the nurses manager office. She was later sent to the hospital. I was officially alone, I had to close the lab for lunch time and later I closed it again because they had gotten someone to train and teach me about the Convid-19. I had students that were getting fustrated with the lack of service at the lab, but there's east much I could do.

Thursday, all hell got loose. Again, I found myself alone. The managers realized that we were starting to run out of masks and we had 3 isolation cases. I had to some how split myself in three so I could run the autoclave, collect samples at the lab and desinfect rooms. In the evening, we got a email saying that all appointments with a doctor or nurse was cancelled.

Friday, all schools in Canada decided to close for two weeks. This was response to the government decision to close all social gatherings for now. I still had to to the office, I made sure that all samples left were sent out to the hospital and finished the sterilizing even cleaned the autoclave. There's wasn't alot going on but I think that made people more nervous. The managers were in meetings all day trying to figure out what's next.

We never got an official answer if we were now working from home or still coming in to our offices. We told to take Monday has a paid day off.

I don't know how this effects me, has I mentioned, I was working by monthly contract and I never got to sign the march one. I was supposed to stay on full time for a little longer but I have no contact confirm this. One of the manager told me that I would work from home but couldn't tell me for how many hours I would be paid. It leaves me in a uncertain spot, I don't know what to do next...

[asiantheatre]

Under the list are all the confirmed, announced shows in the 2018-2019 season featuring Asian writers, actors, designers, directors, etc in New York, London, and International. Listed are the dates for first previews, the theater it’s performed in, and a summary of the show. 

This list isn’t 100% comprehensive and will be updated as time goes on. If we missed a show, please let us know!

Make sure to tune in and give these shows your love! 

BROADWAY (source)

Straight White Men

Until September 9, Hayes Theater

“It’s Christmas Eve, and Ed has gathered his three adult sons to celebrate with matching pajamas, trash-talking, and Chinese takeout. But when a question they can’t answer interrupts their holiday cheer, they are forced to confront their own identities. Obie Award-winning playwright Young Jean Lee takes a hilariously ruthless look at the classic American father-son drama. This is one white Christmas like you’ve never seen before.”

Getting the Band Back Together

August 19, 2018; Belasco Theatre

“The musical comedy follows 40-year-old out-of-work banker Mitch who moves back in with his mother and decides to reunite his old high school band, Juggernaut.”

King Kong

October 2018

This show reimagines the famous movie King Kong into a story about fame, greed, and manipulation within the original framework of a young actress and film maker finding their way to Skull Island, the home of a 2000 pound monkey.

Tootsie

March 29, 2019; Marriott Marquis

“Based on the film, Tootsie tells the story of a talented but difficult actor who struggles to find work until an audacious, desperate stunt lands him the role of a lifetime.”

Hadestown

Walter Kerr; March 22, 2019

Info in the west end section

Be More Chill

Lyceum Theater; February 13, 2019

Info in the offbway section

Chicago

July 1–14; Ambassador Theatre

Japanese star Ryoko Yonekura will make a limited run engagement as Roxie Hart before transferring over to Japan for the national tour.

OFF BROADWAY (source / 2)

Be More Chill

August 9, 2018;  Pershing Square Signature Center

Based on Ned Vizzini’s novel, the show tells the story of an average teenager who takes a pill purported to make people more—you guessed it—chill.

Henry VI

August 21, 2018 - NAATCO 

“Shakespeare’s Henry VI is the story of a great nation’s decent into barbarism and cruelty. It is a study of how the experience of a problematic foreign war erodes civil discourse at home, and how that erosion allows political self-interests to take hold and send a country hurtling into civil war.” 

Rags Parkland Sings the Songs of the Future

September 25, 2018; Ars Nova

 “250 years from now, constructed humans are built in black market labs, Mars is a forced labor camp and underground outlaws are brewing rebellion. You might not remember how Beaux Weathers and her band of “illegal intelligences” fought for the right to exist, but Rags Parkland does. Back on Earth for the first time in 10 years, Rags plays the music that carried us to where we are today. But on this planet, the more things change, the more we stay the same.”

India Pale Ale

October 2, 2018; Manhattan Theatre Club

“In a small Wisconsin town, a tight-knit Punjabi community gathers to celebrate the wedding of a traditional family’s only son, just as their strong-willed daughter announces her plans to move away and open a bar. As they come together for feasts filled with singing and dancing, one generation’s cherished customs clash with another’s modern-day aspirations, and ghosts and pirates from the family’s past linger in everyone’s thoughts – until one sudden event changes everything.”

Wild Goose Dreams

October 30, 2018; The Public Theatre

“Minsung is a “goose father,” a South Korean man whose wife and daughter have moved to America for a better life. Deeply lonely, he escapes onto the internet and meets Nanhee, a young defector forced to leave her family behind in North Korea. Amidst the endless noise of the modern world, where likes and shares have taken the place of love and touch, Minsung and Nanhee try their best to be real for each other. But after a lifetime of division and separation, is connection possible?“

The Resistable Rise or Arturo Ui

October 30- December 22, 2018; Classic Stage Company

The political allegory shows a Depression-era Chicago mobster, who, with the help of his henchmen, manipulates and murders his way to totalitarian rule of the cauliflower trade. The play uses a vaudevillian portrayal of American mafia culture to parallel events that brought the Third Reich to power.

A Chorus Line

November 14, 2018; New York City Center

“A Chorus Line, the 2018 New York City Center Annual Gala Presentation, is a joyous celebration of dance and musical theater—two art forms that City Center has been bringing to New York audiences for 75 years. In 1975, the stories of seventeen Broadway dancers were brought to life when A Chorus Line opened Off-Broadway. The musical was born of workshop sessions with actual Broadway dancers (eight of whom appeared in the original cast) who laid bare their personal stories and the challenges they faced in pursuit of their dreams.“

The Prisoner

November 24, 2018; Theatre for a New Audience/Polonsky Shakespeare Center

“The Prisoner examines the complexities of crime, justice, and compassion in a breathtaking new international production. A man sits alone outside a prison. Who is he, and what is he doing there? Is he free, or is he the prisoner?“

Noura

November 27, 2018; Playwrights Horizons

Noura and her husband have a successful life in New York, and, eight years after having fled their home in Iraq, they’ve finally gained citizen status—which Noura, as an Iraqi Christian, is celebrating by planning the perfect Christmas dinner. But when the arrival of a visitor stirs up long-buried memories, Noura and her husband are forced to confront the cost of their choices, and retrace the past they left behind.

Flower Drum Song’s 60th Anniversary Gala

December 2, 2018 - NAAP

The gala will begin at 5:30 PM with cocktails, followed by a 6:30 PM dinner (a traditional eight-course Chinese banquet). Throughout the evening will be entertainment informed by the history of Rodgers and Hammerstein’s Flower Drum Song.

Nassim

December 10, 2018; New York City Center

In his latest work, Nassim Soleimanpour explores the power of language to unite us in these uncertain times. No rehearsals. A different guest actor at every performance. A sealed envelope. Oh, and some surprises.

Blue Ridge

December 12, 2018; Atlantic Theater Company

“A progressive high-school teacher with a rage problem retaliates against her unscrupulous boss and is sentenced to six months at a church-sponsored halfway house, where she attends to everyone's recovery but her own. Set in Southern Appalachia, Blue Ridge is a pitch-dark comedy about heartbreak, hell-raising and healing.“

Merrily We Roll Along

January 12, 2019; Roundabout Theatre

Roundabout’s company in residence, Fiasco Theater, reimagines its next Stephen Sondheim creation. With Fiasco’s one-of-a-kind imagination, this audacious musical about a trio of showbiz friends who fall apart and come together over 20 years emerges as newly personal and passionate.

Superhero

January 31, 2019; Second Stage Theatre

Before we can save the world, we have to save each other. From the Tony and Pulitzer Prize-winning composer of Next to Normal and the Tony Award-winning writer of Red comes a deeply human new musical about a fractured family, the mysterious stranger in apartment 4-B, and the unexpected hero who just might save the day.

Anne of Green Gables: Part 1

The Royal Family Performing Arts Space; January 24-February 11

An adaptation of the book with the same title.

God Said This

Cherry Lane Theater; January 29-February 15

God Said This paints a portrait of five Kentuckians facing mortality in very different ways. With her mom undergoing chemotherapy, Hiro returns home, struggling to let go of the demons she inherited. Sophie, her born-again Christian sister, confronts her faith while tackling inevitable adversity. James, their recovering alcoholic father, wants to repair his fractured relationship with his daughters. And, John, an old classmate and thirty-something single dad, worries about leaving a lasting legacy for his only son.

Alice By Heart

MCC Theater; January 30-March 30

The show, by Waitress scribe Jessie Nelson and Spring Awakening duo Duncan Sheik and Steven Sater, adapts Lewis Carroll’s famed fantasy into a London-set tale against the backdrop of World War II, as Alice and her friend Alfred journey down a rabbit hole to find love, loss, and the courage to move forward despite harsh circumstances.

REGIONAL / US TOURS (source)

Man of God

January 31 - February 24, 2019; East West Players

A hidden discovery in a hotel bathroom changes the lives of four Korean Christian girls on a mission trip to Thailand. Samantha is hurt that someone she trusted could betray her. Jen is worried about how this might affect her college applications. Kyung-Hwa thinks everyone should adjust their expectations. Mimi’s out for blood. Amid the neon lights and go go bars in Bangkok, the girls plot revenge in this funny, feminist thriller.  

Mamma Mia

May 9 - June 9, 2019; East West Players 

On the eve of her wedding, a daughter’s quest to discover the identity of her father brings three men from her mother’s past back to the Greek island they last visited 20 years ago. The storytelling magic of ABBA’s timeless hits sets the scene for this infectious tale of love and frolicking fun, creating an unforgettable musical experience that will leave you dancing in the aisles!

Tours - Dates are subject to region

Aladdin

Hamilton

Miss Saigon

Hello Dolly

Falsettos

Lea Salonga’s Human Heart Tour

Rent

TV special live on Fox tells the story of the AIDS epidemic in New York City

WEST END/LONDON (source)

The King and I

Until September 29, 2018

Set in 1860s Bangkok, the musical tells the story of the unconventional and tempestuous relationship that develops between the King of Siam and Anna, a British schoolteacher whom the modernist King, in an imperialistic world, brings to Siam to teach his many wives and children.

Love’s Labor’s Lost

August 23, 2018; Shakespeare's Globe Theatre

“Self-denial is in fashion at the court of Navarre where the young king and three of his courtiers solemnly forswear all pleasures in favour of serious study. But when the Princess of France and her entourage arrive, it isn’t long before the all-male ‘academe’ have broken every one of their self-imposed rules. Shakespeare’s boisterous send-up of all those who try to turn their back on life is a dazzling parade of every weapon in the youthful playwright’s arsenal, from excruciating cross-purposes and impersonations to drunkenness and bust-ups. It’s a banquet of language, groaning with puns, rhymes and grotesque coinages“

Dance Nation

August 27, 2018; Almeida Theatre

“Somewhere in America, a revolution is coming. An army of competitive dancers is ready to take over the world, one routine at a time. With a pre-teen battle for power and perfection raging on and off stage, Dance Nation is a ferocious exploration of youth, ambition and self-discovery.“

The Humans

August 30, 2018; Hampstead Theatre

“Hampstead Theatre is proud to present the Broadway production of The Humans by Stephen Karam, the winner of four 2016 Tony Awards including Best Play. Three generations of the Blake family have assembled for Thanksgiving in Brigid and Richard’s ramshackle pre-war apartment in Lower Manhattan. Whilst the event may have a slightly improvised air, the family is determined to make the best of its time together. As they attempt to focus on the traditional festivities, fears of the past and pressures of the future seep into the reunion and the precariousness of their position becomes increasingly evident.”

The Village

September 7, 2018; Theatre Royal Stratford East

“The Village transports the Lope de Vega’s Spanish play, Fuenteovejuna to contemporary India. It’s a powerful story of community and solidarity, and the lengths a person will go to protect themselves from tyranny. In Jyoti’s village, life is simple. People work and sing while living off the land. And finding a partner is far from her mind. She’d much prefer a delicious meal. Things are happy until the Inspector and his men come back to town. But when the tyrannical Inspector has his eye on Jyoti and he commits unspeakable acts against the village, everyone is pushed to breaking point. Will Jyoti dare turn him down despite what it may mean for her village?”

White Teeth

October 26, 2018; Kiln Theatre

“Rosie Jones, the Iqbal twins, their parents, their grandparents, Mad Mary and an avalanche of other characters who make up the everyday chaos of Kilburn High Road come together in an extraordinary revelry of NW6. An epic comedy with music and dance, this theatrical rollercoaster takes us on a fast-paced journey through history, different cultures and chance encounters. Zadie Smith’s breakthrough novel is adapted for stage by acclaimed playwright Stephen Sharkey and directed by Artistic Director Indhu Rubasingham in a major world premiere.”

Hadestown

November 2, 2018; National Theater

“In the warmth of summertime, songwriter Orpheus and his muse Eurydice are living it up and falling in love. But as winter approaches, reality sets in: these young dreamers can’t survive on songs alone. Tempted by the promise of plenty, Eurydice is lured to the depths of industrial Hadestown. On a quest to save her, Orpheus journeys to the underworld where their trust is put to a final test.”

INTERNATIONAL

Philippines 

Side Show - August 31, 2018

M. Butterfly - September 13, 2018

A Doll’s House Part 2 - September 15, 2018

Waitress - November 2018

Angels in America Spring 2019

Beautiful: the Carole King Musical Spring 2019

Korea

Matilda - September 8, 2018

The Greatest Showman - August 7, 2018

Bridges of Madison County - August 11, 2018

Jungle Book - closing August 26, 2018

Singapore

Peter and the Star Catcher - September 28, 2018 

Other Local Shows

Japan

Fiddler on the Roof - December 16, 2018

Something Rotten - December 31, 2018

CHITTY CHITTY BANG BANG - May 16, 2018

Natasha, Pierre, and the Great Comet of 1812 - January 5, 2019

Chicago - Osaka (August 1-4 at the Orix Theater) and in Tokyo (August 7-18 at the Tokyu Theatre Orb).

Full list of shows in Japan (translated)

Other Local Shows

China

Rent - August 30, 2018

Les Mis - September 27, 2018

Hamlet - November 28, 2018

Chicago - December 20, 2018

Other Local Shows

Canada

Come From Away (until June 30, 2019)

Next to Normal Toronto (April 26-May 19)

Dear Evan Hansen 

New Zealand

If/Then - November 29-December 8, 2018

[pixiealtaira]

Mistletoe Mayhem

Hummel Holidays 2016 prompt 17: Mistletoe

Pairing: Kadam of course

Summery: There is such a thing as TOO much Mistletoe.

By mid-December Kurt Hummel wasn’t sure if he loved going to Adam’s apartment or dreaded it.

He loved the peace at Adam’s apartment.  It was always less stressful than the loft. Rachel had been low-key annoyed with him since McKinley’s regionals where Kurt avoided Blaine like the plague and ‘ruined’ her dreams.  She showed it in not even trying to rein in her diva attitude, ever. And Kurt never knew how Santana was going to behave from one day to the next.

At least Blaine had found someplace else to live.  Rachel had invited him to stay with them while he found a place at the start of the semester.  Kurt slept in the loft one night he was there and then spent every other night for three weeks someplace else…either at Adam’s or other Apple’s places…and refused to pay rent while he was not living full time at the loft….going so far as to call Rachel’s dads to explain his dilemma.  Putting up with Blaine at NYADA was already nearly too much for Kurt to handle.

He loved the way Adam’s apartment always smelled.  Adam loved cooking, and he loved having Kurt over to cook with him even more.  Kurt loved cooking with Adam.   And Adam let him bake as much as he wanted.  There was room to move around in the kitchen area, and Adam had full sized appliances and there was an island that separated the kitchen from the rest of the living area and real cupboards and even a pantry. They burned scented candles and incense when they felt like it.  In that manner…Adam’s apartment was heaven.

Adam’s apartment had bedrooms and closets and bathrooms…with walls and doors. Granted the second bedroom was tiny, but it was big enough for a day bed and to be used as a guestroom…or sewing room or art room or study or whatever need was prevalent at the time. The second bathroom might have had only a sink and toilet, but it was off the living area so could be used by guests without them traipsing through the bedroom, so there was that.

He even loved how Adam’s apartment was decorated…for the most part.  Adam had several small trees…one about three feet high and two that were just little table top ones.  They were decorated in themes…one of the small ones was covered in little gingerbread figures and baking items like rolling pins and bowls.  Adam even had little tiny working cookie cutters strung on it.  The other was candy themed, with little blown glass ornaments shaped like wrapped hard candies and gumdrops.  Kurt loved the how delicate they were.  His favorite tree though, was the larger one…Adam picked odd themes and hunted all season to decorate the tree in them, so it was always changing just a little. Adam told Kurt someday when he had moved to a house he’d have a big tree which he’d decorate with all the odd things. The current theme was dungeons and dragons…and somewhere Adam had found a garland made of jingle bells and dice.  Kurt loved it and he didn’t even play D&D.

The problem was…mistletoe was everywhere…and it migrated.  Kurt never knew when he was going to be kissed stepping into the apartment. Not too much a problem when it was just him and Adam. But the rule was…if you were under the plant, you kissed and gathered your berry, so when anyone else was there as well you ended up kissing whoever you ended up under the plant with.  And Adam had some lecherous old lady neighbors…Miss Lilly caught him under the damned plants sixteen times one evening.  And at ninety she did NOT take no for an answer…his cheeks were pinched red and he was wearing more lipstick than she was by the end of the evening.

And Adam thought it hilarious.  Kurt was not as amused.  And it had frankly started to make him nervous to go to Adam’s. He’d even tried avoiding it after the Miss Lilly day. It didn’t really work.

Because the loft was even more ridiculous during the holiday season.  Rachel had gone nuts.  Every day he heard about the Santa debacle from the year before.  She just harped on and on about it.  Santana was snappy and snippy and bratty…Brittany was giving her mixed signals again and her folks were tossing issues up all over the place because they wanted her home but her grandmother didn’t.  And the loft had been decorated very ‘loudly’…by Rachel of all people.  The colors were bright and headache inducing and ugly to boot.

Not to mention Blaine and Sam were over constantly….for holiday parties and gatherings.  And Blaine with any bit of alcohol in him wouldn’t listen to him or leave him alone. And never believed in the word no at all.  Sam with any alcohol in him let Blaine do whatever Blaine liked because they were ‘bros’ and that was more important than anything.

And there was always alcohol.

He was attacked as much at the loft as he was at Adam’s, even without the large amount of mistletoe, by Blaine generally…although early in the month there had been a very scary evening where Santana had drunkenly decided she wanted to see why Brittany was always talking about his kisses and hands.  It was always blamed on the single bit of Mistletoe at their loft…always.

But Adam’s place wasn’t safe either, not with all the Mistletoe.

Kurt had decided to bring it up, even, but he figured that he would do so after the party Adam was hosting on the 18th.  He nearly broke down and talked to Adam before the 18th when Sam drunkenly grabbed his ass at Rachel’s mid-winter winter wonderland bash, but Adam was worried about his party anyway and after listening to his fears his party would be so dull his co-workers would never want to talk to him again, Kurt decided to suck it up and endure Miss Emily two door down’s wandering hands.  The party was for Adam’s co-workers from the café he worked at, so Kurt could kind of see Adam’s worry.  He wouldn’t know what to do with people who didn’t sing all the time either, especially those who also didn’t speak fashion.

Kurt arrived at Adam’s party a bit late.  The subway was running behind and he’d been stuck at the loft longer than he had wanted listening to Rachel’s rant about the Winter Showcase and her insistence that her crushed heart and soul could only be healed with tons of gifts…she would like one from Kurt every day of Hanukkah and at least four for Christmas and he was to make sure Santa found her as well.  Santana got in on the demand fest and ranting, and Blaine and Sam added their Christmas wish lists as they came in while Kurt was headed out.

Adam’s apartment was packed. Kurt couldn’t see him anywhere, either. He could see that the mistletoe rules were in effect and people caught under then were trading pecks back and forth nearly constantly.

Kurt looked upwards before stepping into the apartment and continued his pattern of looking upwards and then walking a few steps as he searched for Adam.  He finally caught sight of Adam near the stove in the Kitchen when he was grabbed by the arms and dragged two steps sideways.

The kiss was not a peck on the cheek.

Adam was at his side and removing him from the man who had grabbed him, placing Kurt behind Adam before the man let go enough for Kurt to step back.

Kurt could hear the slurred words as Adam lit into the fellow and then into the coworker who had brought his already drunk brother to the party in the first place.

Adam turned and bundled Kurt into his arms and then into the kitchen and into the small pantry.

“Darling, are you alright? I could take you home.  I’ll find Alice or someone to watch over everything. I could…”

“Adam, I’ll be fine. I just need to go brush my teeth and sanitize my mouth and scrub my face really well.  I thought at least here I’d be safe from drunken kissing. Old ladies, no…never safe from them, but drunken kisses, I thought I was good here. I hate December.  I hate stupid drunken parties and I hate mistletoe!”

Adam kissed the top of Kurt’s head and escorted him to the bathroom. He stood outside the door and waited for Kurt to be finished and then tucked Kurt against his side for the rest of the evening, which proceeded drama free from the most part.  There were two other Mistletoe incidents which went too far and there was nearly a fist fight over the Christmas Trivia game, but Adam managed to rein everyone in when they started to get rowdier than optimal in such a small space.  Kurt was never more than an arm’s reach away.  The white elephant exchange went well and the party games seemed to be a hit, so both Adam and Kurt decided it wasn’t a disaster, even if neither was willing to call it a complete success.

Kurt started cleaning up as soon as people started leaving, which was a reasonable 11pm. Adam had escorted the last group to a taxi and Kurt headed down to toss the trash into the bin outside.  Adam beat Kurt back.

He was tearing down the Mistletoe when Kurt entered the apartment.

“I am sorry.” He said as soon as he noticed Kurt watching him. “I thought it was funny when it was Miss Lilly and Miss Emily or any of the other old ladies in the building. I knew they were just doing it to tease you.  But it was not funny when someone drunk pulled you under and it wasn’t funny when others were mauled either.  I’m going to toss it all.”

“You don’t have to toss it all…”Kurt said softly.  “But I think it should be in just one place.”

“And where would that be?” Adam asked.

“Over your bed.  I mean, I assume I’m the only one who will be caught by it there, right?”

Adam smiled. “Definitely. You come pick your favorite piece and I’ll tuck it over the bed.  I am so very sorry, Kurt.  You should have knocked sense into me ages ago.”

Kurt walked over and wrapped his arms around Adam. “I didn’t want to make you stop a tradition.  I hate when that happens to me.”

“It isn’t a very old tradition…we had about four pieces in the house growing up. The original Apples started this the first year we formed and it was out of hand even then, really, but that lot was so wild and mixed up that I don’t think we ever noticed. Cutting it back to one bunch, just for us, will be still keeping tradition enough.”

“I love you.” Kurt said. He plucked the prettiest bunch out of the pile by Adam’s feet and went and laid it on the dresser in the bedroom. Then he picked another piece and sat it over the desk. “Two bunches, but in personal spots. I’m going to make sure all the dishes are done and everything is right in the bedroom. Don’t be too long. By the way, I hope you don’t mind me crashing more often.  With the reduction of mistletoe I’m going to be hanging here more often until the Holiday season is over and parties at the loft die down to maybe one a month…and with that the alcohol consumption. I am so very tired of drunken bumbling.”

Adam beamed. “I’ll clear more space in the dresser and closet. Maybe I’ll be able to convince you to just keep stuff here all the time.  And like…just keep adding to it until everything you own is here.”

Kurt spun around and rushed back to Adam. “Adam?”

“Just think about it, yeah?” Adam said. “I know you have several months still on your lease, but I hate what you have to deal with there.  I’ve heard about the shenanigans this month. Rachel is quite freely spreading it all around.  She is the biggest gossip I have ever met. If you were here, you wouldn’t get caught up in their mischief. We could just stick to our own type of carrying-on.”

Kurt smiled.  “I’ll think about it, but I’ll definitely bring stuff over for the rest of the month.”

Adam kissed Kurt. Kurt automatically looked up to see if they were under Mistletoe.

“And another reason for the plant to go.” Adam said. “Kisses aren’t just because anymore.  It is way past time I tossed the stuff.  With it gone you might stop thinking I need a reason to shower you with kisses.”

Kurt kissed Adam and then went humming towards the kitchen.  He really did rather love it at Adam’s apartment.

[tessmontyart]

2017 year review

I am late yet again with this! 😅  2017 was ... a pretty crap year. BUT I made the most of my situation by travelling around Australia doing the most conventions I’ve ever done, growing my following and earning a nice friendly profit! More under the cut ~ (warning, starts off very mopey)

So continuing on from 2016, I was a what they call a ‘job seeker’ .. which means earning a small amount of money to cover rent and bills while applying for 20 jobs a month, only getting a handful of interviews and being rejected by every single one :))) This was extremely frustrating because each interview required a lot of anxiety just to hype myself up to go, and then hearing the same ‘sorry there were better candidates’ or -nothing at all- resulted in even more anxiety and breakdowns, and the whole thing was just a repetitive cycle that made me less and less confident each time.

(I’ve decided to use kittens to convey emotion in this post lol)

In April I was called back to (what’s left of) P55 Studios for some concept work, but it was only a 1 month contract and it took them 6 months to finally pay me for the work I did. It was fun, but man ..I hope they pick up their game soon ... it’s sad to see the state they’re in now.

I was then basically punished for ‘not finding a fulltime job quickly enough’ - the job centre shoved me into a warehouse sorting old clothes 9-5 with next to no breaks, alongside a bunch of ex criminals who were extremely unpleasant and rude to me. The dust made it hard to breathe, most of the clothes had gross stains on them as well as spiders hiding in them. After having another breakdown and being taken to hospital and a psychologist because I freaked some people out, I decided it would be best to go back to being a student and trying to learn more things for my resume, because a University Degree is apparently worth nothing in this world :/

AFTER THAT DECISION, THINGS REALLY PICKED UP! 😅

I did a 6 month IT and Web Technologies course, which was really good! I learnt quite a lot of things including HTML, and I was able to finally make a professional online portfolio with my own domain name ^_^ (tessmontyart.com)

While that was all going on, I was also managing my Etsy store and tabling at conventions, both of which are becoming quite successful which makes me happy! Other than that I’ve just been drawing and drawing and drawing. I’m pretty sure I’ve drawn the most in 2017 than any other year, and I can see my art slowly but surely improving, which is something I’ve been longing for!

I tabled at the most conventions in 2017 too. I did Melbourne Supanova, Central Coast Comicon, Sydney Supanova, Nexus Con, SMASH, Adelaide Supanova as well as 2 local markets. I had a lot of fun with those and am planning to go to even more in 2018! 

Other highlights include:

⭐️ I made my first ever vinyl sticker sets!

⭐️  I made my first ever enamel pins!

⭐️  I made these adorable Nifflers in mini Jars!

⭐️ among a whole load of new products!!

⭐️  I hit 600 followers on Instagram and Facebook! 

⭐️  I successfully completed another Inktober! I failed 2016s because I was in New York and didn’t have time (a fair excuse! I wanna go back)

⭐️  During that inktober I created a new OC, a robo catgirl! I definitely want to draw her more in 2018 :) 

⭐️ I had a go at Livestreaming for the first time! It is such a good way to get stuff done o_o knowing people are watching so you don’t procrastinate lol ..

⭐️ I also started making time-lapse videos, which have become quite popular!

(below is just a screenshot!)

⭐️ I started Fanart Fridays (which I gotta get back into again!)

⭐️ I road tripped all the way from Sydney to Melbourne and back for the first time :D (thats 545.3 miles!)

⭐️ I also roadtripped all the way from Sydney to ADELAIDE and back for the first time xD;; (that’s 854.3 miles @_@ )

⭐️ I got to meet @katiecrooked for the 2nd time and actually hang out for a few days rather than 1 hour ;w; You are amazing and I’m so lucky to have such a great friend!

⭐️ I also got to meet up with the Japanese exchange student I hosted way back in 2011! My Japanese is much worse now but her english has improved so much, I’m so proud TwT

⭐️  I went to CHOCOLATE HIGH TEA

⭐️ Tried a raindrop cake for the first time :0

⭐️ Lights released the most amazing album in the world ‘Skin & Earth’ *_* 

⭐️ Owl City is finally releasing more music! (The cover of “Waving Through A Window” and sneak peaks of the new Cinematic album made me so happy!)

⭐️ The year Hatsune Miku turned 10!

⭐️ I got this cute bag for my birthday and so did my new friends resulting in this adorable pic:

(I’m the one on the right covered in owls. yes I photoshopped my fat out lol)

⭐️ I became obsessed with washi tape

⭐️ Became obsessed with Mystic Messenger

⭐️ Became obsessed with Night In The Woods (and made these cute polymer clay brooches)

⭐️ Annd also got into Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid and Houseki no Kuni ^_^

⭐️ The year Charlie got this ridiculous hat 

⭐️The year Prisoner Zero finally became available on Netflix (the 2D animated series I worked on in 2015/2016)

⭐️ and the year Doctor Who regenerated into a lady!

⭐️ It was another year of cute dates and sweet things with a sweet partner 💖

⭐️ I also got to try Teppanyaki for the first time!

⭐️ I made these cute gingerbread cookies! (my first time making gingerbread)

⭐️ And I made these cute christmas ornaments for my friend of her 2 doggies ^_^

On a sadder note ...

2017 was the year I met my partner’s grandma for the first and last time. She had a birthday party at the start of the year (my first visit to a place called Scone) and she passed away later in the year :( I had to go to my 2nd ever funeral ... it was at a really lovely country town I have never been to called Canowindra. Rest in Peace ♥️

What’s coming in 2018?

I am crossing my fingers for an animation job I applied for a while ago - one of the ladies who used to work at P55 is now working at a bigger animation company and planning to open up another studio near where I live. I wont find out for a while, cause new workplaces take a while to set up, but that would be really amazing if I were to work with her and the old animation gang again. 

Whether anything happens with that or not, I’ll be studying certificate IV of the IT course (like a continuation), and I plan to do even more conventions. Hopefully I can get into Oz Comic Con (they have a selective application process) which is 3 extra conventions if they don’t clash with anything else! (Sydney, Brisbane and Melbourne). 

There’s also other conventions I hadn’t heard of until it was too late to apply that I’m keen to apply for like Animaga in Melbourne, as well as Madman Anime Fest in Brisbane and Melbourne. I also want to make a lot more non-fandom things for market stalls, as well as a comic and zines!

Hopefully I’ll hit 1k followers on fb/ig? :D that will make me feel important lol

I’m also hoping to go on a holiday this year. I seemed to go on some sort of holiday (either domestic or overseas) every year up until now xD; Sounds greedy but I really miss the feel of holidays you know??

Anyway, I could type forever so I’ll stop here. Not sure why I share this much of my life on the internets but its become a tradition!  PLEASE BE KIND 2018, I’M BEGGING YOU 😱

[2016] [2015] [2014] [2013] [2012]

[kxlebcross]

hippity hoppity here goes the long ass rant about my cousin

for context - i was a kid when i started liking kpop, like 13-14 yrs old? i was still collecting plushies, reading magazines for young teens, enjoying some music and playing sims. yes, i may have had my emo episode back then with some heavy music too, and that never went well with my mum’s older sister and her heavily religious husband, but oh boi, the worst was my cousin. she is 6 yrs older than me and that was around the time she started picking out an university to go to, so the focus HAD to be on her, the important future student and her boyfriend and this and that... she was always going on about going to art school and she was really fucking talented so she had all chances to be a really great artist, getting married to her boyfriend, wanting a family and all her future, while i was just a middle school kid dressing in all black, who suddenly started enjoying some fun kpop song on their otherwise heavy metal/rock music playlist.

when she find out, she was GIVING ME HELL for it. do you remember 2013 kpop? adtoy by 2pm, ringa linga by gd & taeyang, gentleman by psy or fantastic baby by bigbang? i fucking loved those songs. i was a kid in a really bad place in life after moving 2 countries away from the place where i was born, from all my friends, my school, my life... listen, it’s 10 years hitting this year since my mother decided about moving and i’m still not over it, so just imagine, how bad i must’ve felt back then, when it wasn’t even a year after the move? i was a devastated little kid who found a little joy in some fun, jumpy kpop tones in contrast to the usual heavy music i was listening to usually (do you remember the oldest bring me the horizon songs, all the screaming and anger? think of it as my regular playlist, my mother hated it haha). i was never a diehard fan, never had posters of idols on my walls, i only have like 2 merch pieces (and those aren’t even original cuz we were poor and could never afford it, so i looked up the merch online and my mum had a similar thing done in a local, cheaper workshop for my birthday one time, please don’t judge me for that) and it was just music for me, as well as the english, american, japanese, polish and hungarian music was just music too. 

and i got terrible shit for it from my cousin, who pretty much criticized everything about me: my clothes (we were poor, i was mostly dressing out of second hand shops and surprise - her hand-me-downs), my shitty phone (and old samsung model i got for my 9th or 10th bday), my taste in books (i really REALLY loved king’s books to which one of my classmates introduced me back then), my inability to perfectly speak the language (though i was raised in a bilingual household, the main language in my house was hungarian, and i was a stubborn kid who rarely ever wanted to speak polish at home, so when we moved i could barely speak the language, had to take extra classes every day in school for almost the entire first school year i spent here because i had to learn to write and speak properly), but the biggest shit i always got for kpop, that it’s garbage, that i don’t even understand it, it’s just shitty party music with extra steps... i resented her for that A LOT, which probably had smth to do with the age difference too, but hey, whatever. i always closed up when we visited them and my mum was understanding about it, she pretty much allowed me to just hang around the place and listen to my music, play on my phone or just read a book, and my aunt hated it - but it was at least peaceful, i occasionally got the kpop jab from my cousin which i shrugged off, but that was it... until one time i spoke up.

i can’t remember what it was about - but we were all having lunch and it was easter or christmas maybe, and at a certain point i got called out for something, maybe using my phone under the table? anyway, i spoke up about treating me like shit because i was already 15 by that and i had a big fucking mouth and no tolerance for their bullshit after listening to it for two years, which ended in my mother almost going into a shock after hearing my vicious remark, my aunt’s husband going into a raging fit and my aunt telling my mum that she’s a terrible mother and raised a terrible kid. we left after that and i didn’t return to them in the following years - i just heard from the grapevine that my cousin ended up dropping out of college because “it was just too tiring and too much”, broke up with her boyfriend and then was just sleeping around with some random dudes, and generally just misrailed her life and had to move back in with her parents who were devastated after all their hopes about my cousin went to hell.

i haven’t seen them for years - we sort of reconciled a few years later when my mother forced me to do it; my cousin probably forgot by then whatever shit she was giving me earlier and we hanged out a bit, caught up and shit... i’m pretty sure it was only because she was to get married to her boyfriend and wanted the whole family there? not important. 

the boyfriend is a pretty awful person imo tbh - he has some nationalist tendencies, not once spoke up in a very homophobic and derogatory way about all kind of lgbtq+ people, which in the end resulted in me removing him from all my social medias, because miss me with that nationalism babe. anyway, they got married and moved into their own place and into the family spotlight again, while i finished school and then years after their wedding my mum announced very proudly that i finished school with good grades and got into university - which immediately stirred the shit in the old shit bucket our relations were. my own fucking aunt dared saying that i’ll never succeed in life and will drop out than her own daughter would because i’m not made for a successful life. she never said it to my face - said it to my mother, who gave up a job she loved just so she could send me half a country away from my home so i could study where i wanted. i mean, i have my own issues with my mother too but i can’t not admire her sacrifices she made for me - so that sort off hit it off again with me and i once again burned bridges with them when moving out 3 years ago. seen them maybe two times since then? i mean, i never tried reaching out to them - they only ever got some happy birthdays and merry christmases on facebook, because my mother insisted i do that. they never called or wrote back, not for my birthday, not for christmas, not for anything else. i only found out in the last few months that on that christmas 2 yrs ago, which i spent alone, they were asked by my mum to please invite me over at least for a coffee. they never even called and my mum was heartbroken over it, because she was literal thousands of kilometres away, working and counted on her sister to invite me... my mum’s friends, basically strangers, ended up inviting me over for a christmas dinner in the end. i spent a family holiday with people i’ve literally seen five times in my life and they were more than joyful to have me in their company and they even got me a present, while my technically closes family couldn’t even spare a phone call.

now i’m 23 and my cousin is closing on 30 - and she’s suddenly overcome with that kpop obsession she has, spamming both instagram and facebook with mv links, fantaken photos, band-related posts and news articles, all heart emojis and “OmG i LoVe ThEm” kind of bullshit captions, she’s intensely drooling over certain members she’s posting a lot about, i’m seeing at least 15 posts daily about her bad drawings of members of the band.... listen.... if an artist doesn’t practice for 7+ yrs, the skills they had just start to fade away even if they were really talented (trust me, i know it from my own experiences, i used to know how to draw, sing and play a few instruments when i was young but then i stopped practicing and now the most i can draw in a stickman, i can’t play any instruments for shit and i’m a low average in singing too), but she thinks she’s some motherfucking superstar of drawing portraits (trust me, shes NOT) and keeps spamming all those pics and posts and shit.... and just seeing that sort of brought the memories back, of her treating me like shit over a thing she’s now obsessed with and i’m just sitting here like.... gag.

i could absolutely understand being a fan and being a group stan but there is a certain limit after which being a fan turns into that gross, twisted thing. do you know all those memes that go along the lines of “i don’t hate kpop because of the music, i hate kpop over the r*tarded fans it has”? that’s a whole ass mood. i’m sure that everyone who’s at least interested in kpop heard of the insane psychofan part of the fanbase.... and she’s turning into it. she’s fucking drooling over some famous strangers while she’s like... 30. and has a husband. would it be so hard for her to “keep it in her pants”? i’m super NOT interested in seeing all that crazy fan shit she’s pulling and honestly she’s grossing me out and you know people like her are the reason i can’t even fucking enjoy kpop anymore the way i did earlier - because it’s being fucking pushed down my god damned throat every-fucking-where i look. just calm the very fuck down, please. behave like a god fucking damned adult. 

[idorkish]

Little Munson - Chapter 1

A/N - Welcome back to the story of Angel and Bobby Munson! Angel is finally in high school, which means new challenges for both her and Bobby. I tried a different format for this chapter, I’m trying to move the story along so we can get back into things! I have a lot of one shots that are planned to go with this. That’s the reason it’s short and time jumpy.  =D

Tag List:

@mrstellerwinston @howmanywastedmoments @soafanficluvr1 @redwoodog @chaosmieu @khyharah @5sos1dsex @opies-oldlady @queen-ofthe-bikers-soa @mrsirishboru @fortheloveofthesoa @samcrolivesforever  @ineedthesons  @divathelover @happys-crazy-queen22 @kitkat1690 @sons-of-anarchy-imagines-blr  @tellermorelli  @juiceboxxortiz  @ladyannikki @mybabysons @jade770 @kacilove26

Summer seemed to fly by too quickly for Angel once she started helping Luanne. Bobby had been reluctant to let his young daughter be in a porn studio but he gave in when Luanne, Angel, and Otto assured him that Angel would be confined to two office spaces and that a partition would be put in to make sure she never saw the sets. Angel worked 20 hours a week, all other free time was spent taking cooking and art classes in the community. Angel flourished over the summer. She had saved a fair amount of money she made from Luanne and was able to buy a new wardrobe that would take her through school.

August

Now here she was, a freshman in high school. Her first week had seemed to blur past quickly. Angel had made a couple new friends, had begun to plan out her study schedule for the semester, and even decided what clubs she wanted to try for. All in all, Angel had a great first week of high school. She saw many of the kids from her elementary school but it was different now. No longer would she be picked on. No longer would she have to live under a principal who loathed the club and those associated with it. Angel already loved being a high schooler. By the end of the month, Angel had a good idea of the different clubs she wanted to try out.  

“Hey Daddy! How was work?” Angel asked as she rummaged through the pantry. She and Bobby agreed that they’d make dinner together at least three times a week when possible as a way to have time together. Bobby walked up behind her and pressed a kiss to her temple. “Same as always baby. Busy, lots of shit to deal with. What are we making for dinner tonight?”

“I was thinking spaghetti and homemade garlic bread tonight! We still have half a loaf of bread that we made over the weekend. Think it would be good to use.”

September

Angel had finally been introduced to both Jax and Opie’s girlfriends. Angel remembered Jax’s girlfriend, Tara, from years ago. They had once been in a class together until Tara skipped a grade. Opie’s girlfriend, Donna, seemed familiar but Angel had never really spoken to her. Both girls seemed to take to Angel immediately. It was lucky for Angel that she had the same lunch period as Donna and Tara, so she always had people to eat with. Often, Jax or Opie (sometimes both) would skip a class and join them for lunch.

Bobby loved to see his daughter thriving in the new environment. He knew that Jax and Opie would be there to look out for her and ensure that no one messed with her. Since her starting school, he found himself trying to finish more work at home so he could spend time with her.  

October

Halloween was creeping up on Angel. This had become her favorite holiday and she wanted nothing more than to just decorate the house and garage as spookily as possible. With the help of Gemma, Luanne, Tara, and Donna, Angel was able to get all the decorations she wanted put up.

“Hi Angel”

The voice made Angel freeze in front of her locker. Angel swore she was hearing voices because it could not be the boy she had a crush on actually talking to her.

“Angel, are you ok?”

Angel turned toward the voice and smiled.  “Y-yea! How are you David?”

There stood David Hale. He was in the same year as Opie and Jax and Angel has noticed him when the boys brought him to hang out at the clubhouse. He had always been nice to Angel.

“I’m good. I was wondering if you were going to the Halloween party at the club this weekend?”

“Oh, yea! Of course I am! I”m helping my Aunt Gemma with the setup. Plus, it’s one of the few times us kids are actually allowed at the parties, I’m not going to miss it!”

David gave her a big smile and wide. Angel couldn’t help but blush. “Well, I was...well I was hoping that you and I can hang out at the party. Jax and Opie invited me and I was really hoping that we’d have some time to talk and chill.”

Angel was ecstatic for the rest of the day. When she got home, Angel tossed her bag on the black and fell back onto the couch. Covering her face with a pillow, Angel let out a loud squeal of delight as she kicked her feet in the air. “Shit...what am I going to wear?”

November

Before they knew it, Thanksgiving was almost there and Angel was on her first school break. She had finished all school work needed early on so she could enjoy break and she knew what she wanted to do. “Hey Dad, can I talk to you?” Angel stood in the doorway to Bobby’s office, a wide grin on her face.

Bobby looked up from paperwork that he was reading over and turned to face his daughter. “Sure thing Angel, what’s going on?”

“Well, you know how I was working with Luanne all summer and saving up? I was wondering if, maybe, you know...if you’d let me use some of that money to buy something?”

Bobby chuckled and placed his glasses on his desk. He found it amusing that Angel would ask to use her own money. He had told her numerous times that as much as he wanted her to save it, she was free to do with it what she wanted. “Well, it’s your money kid. What did you want to get?”

Angel finally stepped foot into her father’s office and sat on the edge of his desk. She had rehearsed this numerous times and she felt confident that she could get through this without messing out. “Ok, well I know I can use Jax’s old game system and I have been using it for a couple months now. But it’s crud, Dad. It hardly work from all the abuse he put it through over the years and I’ve had to tape the cords up so many times. So I was wondering if you’d take me to the store so I can buy a new Sega Genesis and some games! They’ve been out for a couple years now and the prices have gone down. And I could afford it all myself and you wouldn’t need to pay for anything!”

Bobby laughed and patted her knee. He had been worried that she was going to want to blow her money on makeup and clothes. He knew that day would be coming but he wasn’t ready yet. The fact that his little girl wanted games was a pleasant surprise for him. “Of course, we’ll go later today. It’s your money after all.” “Thank you Daddy! Ahh, I’m so excited! Maybe some friends can come over too? And possibly, if you allow it...David can come over?” Angel had her arms wrapped tightly around Bobby’s neck as she squealed in delight. “Please? Please please?”

Bobby hugged her tightly and laughed more. “Anything you want baby girl. And as for David, yeah...he can come over. But Jax and Opie have to be here if I’m not!”

December

Before they knew it, Christmas was already around the corner. Bobby had been stressed, wondering what to get Angel and the others. He had let Angel have full run of decorating once more. Bobby didn’t care much for the holidays, but Angel seemed to shine when she could decorate how she wanted. He knew they would be spending Christmas with the club at Gemma’s house once again, but he wanted to do something special for just the two of them. “Hey Angel, how much more do you need to get done here?”

Angel skipped into the room and smiled wide at her father. Bobby turned to face her and couldn’t contain his laughter. There stood Angel, wrapped loosely in string lights and the tree skirt wrapped around her shoulders as she went from pose to pose. “I don’t know Dad, how much does it look like I need to get done? I mean, I am totally rocking this right now!”

Bobby wiped the tears from his eyes as he gripped the seat, trying his hardest to remain standing from laughing too hard. “We’ll worry about putting up the lights later. Go get dressed. And put on something nice, we’re going somewhere tonight. It’s an early present for you.”

Angel bounced in the truck seat. Bobby had made her wear a blindfold and refused to give her any hints. Angel tried to figure out where they were going but Bobby had made sure to make various turns to confuse Angel. “We’re here baby. Take off the blindfold.”

Angel removed the blindfold and stared at the building before them. “Are...are you serious Daddy?” Angel wiped at her eyes as she quietly got out the truck. NUTCRACKER was in bright lights, illuminating the theatre before them. “Daddy, are we seriously going to see it?” Bobby smiled and nodded, holding his arm out for her. “I know you’ve been wanting to see this live. Called in a favor for some good seats. Good present?”

“Oh Daddy! Thank you so much! This is the best present ever!”

Bobby chuckled and pulled his daughter close to his side, pressing a kiss to her temple. “Actually, there’s more.” Angel looked up at him, her face scrunched in confusion. Bobby smiled and turned her to face the building once more. There stood David, with a small wrapped box in his hand. Angel looked back at her father, “What’s...what’s going on Daddy?”

“Well, you’re going to see the show with David tonight. I know you’ve been spending a lot of time together lately. This is my gift to you both. Don’t worry, I’ll be there too. I’m meeting someone here tonight. Now go enjoy and merry Christmas baby.”

Angel wrapped her arms tightly around Bobby’s waist and leaned up to kiss his cheek. “Thank you so much Daddy. Merry Christmas.”

[kyleelisetht]

How My Late Son-in-Law’s Final Gift of Belkis Ayón Turned My Grief to Joy.~KyleeliseTHT

February—this is the month in which my birthday was celebrated during my early childhood. Sometime later, January became the month. The 11th is the day. Of course, there’s more to this story. But not, now.

Apparently, the January birthday was difficult to keep track of and often forgotten, altogether. Over the years, I grew weary of the slight and decided to ditch both January and February as months in which to celebrate my birth. I love Spring! —and determined to make its first day, whenever it fell, my birthday.

This was a wonderful way to circumvent being casually forgotten.

But, when I changed my birthday, everybody noticed.

In 2017, my daughter and son-in-law put together my very first family birthday celebration. These two were a young aspiring couple that were just getting by, having recently opened a health spa and art gallery in a booming but then struggling artist community.

That year, my daughter worked closely with a local cake designer located in her artist neighborhood to produce a beautifully decorated red velvet cake. She and my son-in-law added flowers and other birthday party treats and delivered the bounty to my home, which is several towns south of where they lived.

Both in their twenties, the couple was so proud of their accomplishment—Mom’s first real family birthday party. I was, too. And just like that, my birthday became a thing!

My oldest daughter couldn’t attend that year. So, for 2019, she took over the planning of my birthday celebration, which would come in the form of an extraordinary collective gift.

In the mid-90s, I was introduced to the work of the Cuban printmaker Belkis Ayón Manso, referred to as Belkis Ayón. Incorporated in her imagery was the presence of an all-male secret society known as Abakuá, which I’d studied as a student of historian and professor Robert Farris Thompson. In her works, Ayón had symbolically interjected herself as the heroin Sikán, who’d been sacrificed after revealing a secret that would, eventually, bring together two warring African tribes—the genesis of Abakuá.

The artist died September 11, 1999.

In 2010, Turner publishing released an exhaustive catalogue raisonné of Ayón’s works and writings that includes additional text by her friends, Cristina Vives and David Mateo, created with support from the artist’s estate, organized by her sister, Dr. Katia Ayón Manso.

For many years, I planned or attempted to purchase a copy of the book, which was beautifully constructed and is filled with stunning high-resolution images of Ayón’s work. Modestly price at just around $50, it was a worthy investment I was never quite able to execute.

When I began the daunting work of producing a catalogue raisonné for the artist Tmnk/NOBODY in early 2017, I thought, again, about what Vives and Mateo had accomplished, and the many years their efforts took to be realized as a published book.

In 2016, the Fowler Museum at UCLA hosted the first large scaled solo showing of Ayón’s work in the U.S. As the exhibit traveled the country, the price of the seminal book about the artist’s work spiraled out of reach. Many resellers took full advantage of the book’s scarcity, asking well over $2000 for the fifty-dollar catalogue.

I thought I’d successfully purchased a copy for its original price only to have the seller claim that it was lost during shipping and giving a swift full refund.

After all those years of trying, I accepted that the book was simply out of reach.

It was not.

My oldest daughter, an arts administrator, took on the job of searching out the book both in and outside the U.S. Somehow, she located a copy at a reasonable price. A perfect birthday gift for Mom, she thought. But she’d have to convince her younger sister and brother-in-law to chip in in order to pull it off along with my Christmas present.

It took some sacrificing for my daughter and son-in-law to pitch in. They’d just purchased a home and business location and had nothing, really, to spare. But they did it anyway.

They purchased three books, two on the artist Charles W. White AND the Belkis Ayón: Nkame: Catalogue Raisonné I’d so longed for.

My son-in-law was an artist, too, and a lot of fun. And he loved that his mother-in-law was a typical starving writer/artist, too.

Many times, while enjoying a cigarette on my back porch—often while he’d catch a football game on his cellphone in season—we’d muse about the day when Florida would break-up the monopoly on the cannabis trade so we could start a boutique business of our own, even though I don’t partake in weed products. How else might we, two fledgling artists, make an honest high-income living?

I would get the White books on Christmas.

They’d made the decision to save the Ayón book for my birthday because I’d spoken so much about the difficulties acquiring it. Another out-of-the-box birthday surprise was underway.

But…

On November 16, 2018, my beloved son-in-law died after an excruciatingly long and prayerful week in hospital.

We’d planned a Christmas together as a family. And, he would have been pleased to help hand-off my new White artbooks. My birthday present, however, would have spiked his joy to a whole other level.

Moving through the holidays and facing my birthday on the 11th, I haven’t been able to contain my laughter and joy when I think about my late son-in-law.

Like when he and my daughter put together my first real family birthday party two years ago, he would have made this birthday the very best of the best birthday-present-giving experience anyone could manage, smiling brilliantly as he took it all in. This I know is true.

So, there you have it! This is how my late son-in-law managed to help turn my most dreaded day of the year into a joyful celebration of my life and his.~KyleeliseTHT