#first her family drama and next Anthony

[lyramundana]

I’m still processing that someone made a headcanon about my au, that I invented based on another au. I feel honoured🥺

And I absolutely love that idea. I actually have my own version of each villain’s backstory on my mind and this one with Kate is very close to what I thought. I believe the drama with the yandere Bridgertons feels juicier if they’re the only ones that don’t remember anything and the Spouses, on the other side, have every single memory and live with the trauma of what happened, and it happens that the Bridgertons are triggerers of all those bad memories. So it’s only natural that once they get a hold of the new situation, their first reacion is to “nope” out of London. 

One thing I adore about the isekai au is the importance of platonic bonds and yandereism. Look, I think the trope of someone “fixing themselves” thanks to romance is really cute and hearwarming, the message that love can defeat anything. But platonic bonds are equally important and impactful. And I’m a sucker for the found family trope, which happens to be with the Featheringtons and the Spouses in all its glory. Instead of improving themselves by falling in love, they find comfort in their new family and naturally become better people because of it. The power of family is powerful too, and sometimes I think the message that “romance is the answer for anything” is a bit toxic. So yeah, in my mind, the Spouses all have their shit together already by the time they finally meet their Bridgerton counterparts. It’s the crazy family that goes nuts instead.

Now with my personal addition to this beautiful idea. 

While Kate felt that she was always the forgotten daughter, the third-wheel, the one that didn’t belong, it wasn’t like for her family, of course. She may have not carried her in her womb, but Mary loved the girl from the moment she layed eyes on her. How could she not? She was her husband’s flesh and blood, a breathing reflection of the love of her life. She always wanted to be a mother, so she took to little Kate instantly. But when she fell pregnant, her and her husband were over the moon and focused a lot of the uncoming baby. Maybe they should have payed more attention to Kate, maybe she should have spoke to her husband about his grief and remind him that Kate was her own person and not his deceased wife. She should have noticed that the girl’s compliance and soft-spoke nature was just her hiding her feelings and making herself smaller because she felt left out. 

She should have done so many things, but she didn’t. When Edwina finally arrived, praised and compliments flew upon her as soon as she could walk. She was a ball of joy, the daughter everyone dreamed of having. She was Mary’s miracle, her pride, and perfect. Of course she didn’t love Kate any less, but she got a bit caught up in the hype. If she had looked away from the veil of happiness and perfection surrounding them three, she would have seen a fourth piece suffering in the shadows, slowly moving further and further from them. Her husband’s death only worsened things. Kate took over everything and became everyone’s stability, keeping them afloat. Mary noticed she had gotten quieter and colder in the last months, making a lot of preparations for them in London and even finding a good husband for Edwina, but she rarely spoke to them anymore. And when Mary finally realized what was happening, it was too late already. Her daughter was gone. 

Edwina didn’t really understand what happened. She was innocent and blind to the pessimist aspects that surrounded her family, having been shielded from it by both her mother and Kate. Like any girl that grew up sheltered from the evil of the world, she could be ignorant to problems and don’t really understand the gravity of a situation. She never lacked anything, everything that went in the house was for her first, and she grew up hearing nothing but praises about her. She never felt the comparisons to Kate as something hurtful, since she only got the good side of them. Edwina wasn’t a bad person the slighest, just naïve. And so, she had no idea why her sister dissapeared one day out of nowhere. Just few days ago, she had announced them that Edwina will be marrying a rich and handsome lord as soon as she debuted in London, which would put their family in a great position. Things were good, more than good, so why? Why did she leave? How could she?

Kate is on the edge of a heart attack when she finds out. It’s Simon who tells her, having recognized the surnames on one of Portia’s letters he saw by accident. This shouldn’t happening. She worked so hard to change things, to start a new life. There’s no way Portia wasn’t aware of who they were. Is the past doomed to repeat itself? Can’t she enjoy her second opportunity without having to face the physical reminders of her old pain? The encounter is far from ideal, but the three of them are forced to deal with it

In the isekai Portia au, where the Spouses remember but the Bridgertons, it's implied that Kate had a bad relationship with her family at the end and that's what pushed her to become a villainess. Her father couldn't look at her because she was a reminder of the wife he lost, her stepmother was kind but focused on little Edwina and everyone around her compared her constantly to her perfect sister. It'll drive anyone mad, and It's understandable Kate developed some resentment.

What if Kate, when she reincarnates, instead of staying with her family anyway, she decides to leave before things get bad? She doesn't want to repeat her actions, but can't stand another lifetime of feeling left aside and sacrificing herself for her family's happiness. She arranges everything for Edwina to find a good match and guarantees them both a cosy life, and starts to look for ways to move out. Then it comes to her ears that some Baroness Featherington is looking for a governess for her young children and Kate takes the opportunity. She makes sure Mary and Edwina are settled, and once everything is done, she packs her stuff and leaves.

Her new life in the Featherington residence is better than she expected. Lady Portia is a very busy woman but has still taken under her wing children that aren't even hers and raises them along with her daughters. She can't always be with them, so that's what Kate is for. Teach them, guide them, look after them. She meets Duke Simon, a regular visitor of the Featheringtons, and they become best friends. Things are going well for her.

Until Portia tells her that they'll be housing the Sharma family for a while because the daughter is about to announce her engagement and Mary needs assistance. And if the situation wasn't awkward enough for Kate, when she meets her sister's bethroted it's even worse. It's no other than Viscount Bridgerton, the man that started all her problems in the past life and caused her death

Drama ensues

I like this, let me tweak it a little bit to fit a little better with the rest of the au. @lyramundana since spouses remembering was your addition to the au I think you might want to see this.

Kate was young when she left India, only 18. Governesses were not usually hired that young but she had some hope. Lady Featherington, who was a long distance associate of her father's, had a reputation of taking in those who needed it among her staff and some rumored even her wards. There was only enough money for one of them, and Kate refused to let the past repeat itself so she chose to take herself out of the picture. Even if things were good now she knows they won't last.

Kate tried not to wrinkle her nose at the tea, English tea was never as good as the tea back home.

"You are a bit young for the position," Lady Featherington said, her eyes looking over Kate's qualifications.

"But I am well qualified-" Kate started.

"Of that I have no doubt," Lady Featherington said, her voice gentle. Then the conversation took a turn. "Tell me Ms. Sharma, if you were to start a business what would be your trade?"

Kate glanced down at the tea again. "Tea, I can't stand the way English prepare their tea." She blushed realizing she just insulted the offered drink from her potential employer.

Lady Featherington laughed. "I see. Very well Ms. Sharma you will be instructing my youngest two, Lucy and Felicity, on writing, reading, and arithmetic, but when Simon comes to instruct the older ones on business you shall join them. He will help you on getting started with your tea business. I will help with funding and eventually we will make you a woman of independent means."

Kate didn't know what to say and was not sure of what just happened. "Lady Featherington I-"

"I like to make good investments Ms. Sharma," Lady Featherington said. "Like the others I believe you will be a good one too."

What Kate doesn't know is that Portia also has knowledge of the before, and she truly did believe Kate could do it. Like her other little villains she deserved a second chance as well. She also knew Kate's pride and with her being older than the others when she got them wouldn't accept help without putting in some sort of work. So a compromise.

The next day Portia introduced her to the rest, and Kate is quickly welcomed. They honestly treat her more as an equal or an an older sister than a member of their staff. With time she basically becomes another ward without the official papers. Especially when she joins them for Simon's lessons. Kate is astounded that Simon is actually a duke. They quickly become best friends.

Over the next few years Kate begins her tea business. Experimenting and mixing new teas for different pallets. She is prouder the more her business grows. She is happy, especially since Portia avoids London like the plague so she had no worries of running into the god awful Bridgerton.

Over time Kate learns the others were like her, villains in a past life to different members of the Bridgertons who got a second chance and was not willing to mess that up. They were also thankful Portia avoids London as they rather not have London seasons themselves.

Then one year on the verge of one London season Portia announces that they will be spending it in London and that those old enough will be entering society. "Kate, Prudence, Philippa, Sophie, Phillip, and Michael that all means you. You all need to learn to navigate business around London."

A collective groan is heard around the table. None of them want to go. There is so much of a higher chance of running into the Bridgertons if they go, they don't want that kind of trouble for themselves! But they're also not gonna disobey Portia like that.

"I also have a friend who will be arriving tomorrow. She and her daughter will be staying with us during the season. I will be assisting her with some business deals here in England before her daughter debuts."

What Portia doesn't say is that the friend is Lady Mary Sharma, who has been friends with Portia before she married her husband and she has been in contact with since Kate showed up on her doorstep. Mary had written to her frantic that her oldest daughter had left for England on her own. Portia had reassured her and sent updates to Mary about Kate. Now that Portia is forcing the kids to learn how to navigate London she asked Mary if she wanted to see Kate in her first season? Mary jumped on the chance, she was absolutely going to be there for her daughter's first season she'll fight anyone who tires to stop her.

Portia invited Mary to the country estate first before going to London. She suspected the Sharma family will have to work some things out first.

[thebluemallet]

EARLY Predictions for Bridgerton Season 4

BENEDICT IS OFFICIALLY CONFIRMED TO BE THE LEAD FOR SEASON 4!

I've had this in my drafts for a couple of weeks. But now that Benophie is officially happening next season, I have some EARLY predictions for the next season. I'll have more predictions when we finally have a clip or a trailer, but for now I'm gonna cast a wide net for what I think will happen in season 4.

1- MASQUERADE!

They really name-dropped that masquerade ball like Tahani Al-Jamil name drops her celebrity friends. And they mentioned it in the promo with Luke T. The masquerade ball is happening! My guess is it'll happen somewhere in the first two episodes of season 4. This will be where Benedict meets his Cinderella/mysterious Lady In Silver/Sophie Beckett.

The code name for season 4 is supposed to be Vauxhall, where we saw Daphne and Simon launch their fake dating plot in season 1. That was a public ball, which means that anybody who could pay the fee could get into it. Perhaps we'll return there for the masquerade ball. Makes much more sense for Sophie to be able to crash that instead of a private ball at the Bridgerton house.

Let's just hope her carriage doesn't turn into a pumpkin before she can make her escape.

2- A Possible Time Jump

In Benedict's book, he meets Sophie at the masquerade, she runs away at midnight, and then he doesn't see her again for another two years. I think a time jump could happen again. Specifically for a few of my upcoming predictions.

Also, it would add to the drama.

Can you imagine the reaction from the fans with the screen fades to black and then some text fades in that reads TWO YEARS LATER?

3- Kate and Anthony Might Not Make An Appearance Next Season

Possibly an unpopular opinion, but I almost dont know why they bothered with having Kate and Anthony in season 3. It seemed like it boiled down to "We're here! We're hot! We're horny! And we're fucking off now! Bye!"

At least when Daphne showed up in Anthony's season she helped drive the plot forward and tried to help guide her brother on the bumpy road to matrimony. Anthony had one half-assed conversation with Colin about his engagement to Penelope. Kate did most of the heavy-lifting when it came to important talks with the family. She did most of the talking to Colin the night before his wedding to Penelope. (Not that it mattered because all of her work was undone the moment Charlotte showed up to the wedding.)

Kate also gets credit for speaking with Eloise to try and smooth things over between her and Colin. And then they left their family for a third time to go all the way to India, a journey that's going to take them six months one way.

But with a time jump, that would give enough time for Anthony and Kate to go to India, have their baby, spend some time there, and then make the long journey back to be present after the time jump with a toddler.

(With how pregnant Kate was looking at the wedding, I would not be surprised if she gave birth at sea. She and Anthony did not think that plan through at all. And why the hell did they leave without attending Francesca's wedding??? And when the Queen was certain that a Bridgerton was behind Lady Whistledown???)

Anthony and Kate being absent would also be a convenient way to keep the Bridgerton House set around for a little while longer.

Anyway, sending Kate and Anthony off to India felt like a way to let Jonny and Simone do other projects for a season instead. Jonny himself is probably gonna be busy with all of the press for the upcoming Wicked movie. So if the announcement comes that they won't be around, I wouldn't be surprised.

4- Last Season for Queen Charlotte Queen Charlotte Lives Forever!

Bridgerton is not known for being 100% historically accurate. And let's face it, even if it were, people would still be complaining about the historical inconsistencies. But one thing Bridgerton is creeping up on is the year 1818. And it's in November of that year that the real-life Queen Charlotte passed away.

Season 4 will, I assume, start in 1816. If they do a one-year time jump, we'll get the rest of the season in 1817 when the main events of Benedict's book take place. If they do a two-year time jump, like they did in the books, then we'll be in 1818 and we'll be in the year we say goodbye to Queen Charlotte.

BUT, the showrunners have pretty much said that they've decided the show exists in an "alternate universe" and they're just going to keep Queen Charlotte around for a while.

The Queen lives. Long live the Queen.

5- Eloise Meets Sir Phillip Crane (?)

While the masquerade references were heavy-handed, the references to Philoise were more subtle. In episode 3x02, Eloise wears a dress that is patterned with the same flower that was gifted to her by Sir Phillip in the books. And in 3x05, when trying to make herself feel better about her betrothal, Cressida tells Eloise that the two of them can "flirt with widowers." The showrunners are slowly setting up the Eloise/Phillip dynamic--they have been since season 1. I think they'll set more things into motion in season 4 and set them up for season 5.

Eloise already expressed to Kate how she felt as if everyone was pairing off and leaving her behind. Benedict's marriage will end up being the tipping point for Eloise.

Phillip would have lived the life of a botanist/academic if it weren't for his brother's tragic passing. Perhaps his academic connections could play a part in Eloise's desire to meet new people and change the world?

If they meet in season 4, it could be the catalyst for them to begin to exchange letters like they did in the books. Which will ultimately set them up for their story in season 5.

Of course, this also means that Marina is going to have to die offscreen at some point 😐

6- Cressida Redemption (?)

One of my major gripes with season 3 was that they gave so much time to the threesome subplot that two other subplots seemed to have no real conclusion or were dropped completely. One of the subplots that didn't get wrapped up as nicely as it could have was Cressida's. We didn't see her reaction to Penelope unmasking herself as Lady Whistledown. She just kind of...left.

There is a long-standing fan theory that Cressida will have a part to play in the Benedict/Sophie story based on a piece of script that named Cressida's mother "Araminta". If this is true, then I think we'll see Cressida in some way next season. And maybe she'll get a happier ending. I never thought at the beginning of the show that I'd want Cressida to end up happy somewhere, but boy season 3 did a great job of making me actually sympathetic to her character.

7- Another Offscreen Wedding

One thing that I know frustrated Kathony fans last season was not seeing an onscreen wedding for Kate and Anthony. I mean, we saw a wedding, and Kate and Anthony were there, but he almost got married to the wrong person. The closest we got was Anthony disassociating so hard that he astral projected himself into an alternate reality.

The only onscreen weddings to canonical spouses we've seen have been the Daphne/Simon, Colin/Penelope, and Francesca/John weddings. But if anybody was hoping to see an onscreen wedding with Benedict in season 4, think again.

I believe that the drama of Benedict and Sophie's story will keep up through all eight episodes of their season. And, like Kate and Anthony's season, we'll flash forward in time at the end of the episode to Benedict and Sophie several months into their marriage. But we won't get to see the actual wedding.

8- Crossdressing Sophie (?)

Admittedly, this is less of a prediction and more wishful thinking on my part. This is the route I would go down if I was writing for the show, anyway.

Show!Benedict now being canonically pansexual has opened up the possibility for him to have an LGBTQ+ partner. But I have a slightly different idea. One plot point of Benedict's book is that Sophie, after running away from her stepmother's house, cuts off all of her hair to sell when she's desperate for money.

I think Show!Sophie could still get her hair cut off like in the book, and then go around disguised as a man for safety/freedom of movement/job opportunities. Then Benedict gets confused when he discovers Sophie in "boy mode" because he hasn't felt this level of attraction to someone since his Lady In Silver.

Maybe we'll get a Victor/Victoria scenario out of it (woman pretending to be a man pretending to be a woman).

Like I said, this is less of a prediction and more of the route I would go down if I was writing for the show. It probably won't happen this way. But maybe I'll give fanfic writers some plot bunnies.

[bella-rose29]

Deck the Halls (and not your partner) - part 4

Christmas Eve, and the day of the party.

once again I maintain the idea that lockwood has his tea as a Cameron special (for absolutely no reason, they've just merged into one being in my mind)

Word count: 3.2k

Warnings: swearing, family members being mean, lockwood never put his pyjamas back on, I should mention now that they're 18 for plot and ethical reasons, mentions of body image issues, innuendos?

series master list

(image credit to @sxnflowersa_tv on pinterest)

When Y/n woke up the next morning, her first thought was that she was cold.

Her second was that she was in a double bed and not her usual tiny single in Portland Row, and the third was panic at seeing her boss shirtless.

Lockwood's blanket had slipped at some point in the night, and so when she sat up and stretched she was met with the sight of him sleeping soundly in the armchair, his pyjamas folded neatly on the small table next to him. How he wasn't freezing to death she wasn't sure, but then Lockwood had never made sense to her. One minute he was all smiles and charm and then the next he was saying something completely opposite into her ear, and she was left to figure out which version was the real Lockwood.

Today would be difficult, and they had to come to some sort of understanding if they were going to survive the hell that they would soon be entering.

Lockwood didn't look comfortable at all, with his neck at an odd angle and his legs curled up underneath him (he was bound to get pins and needles when he woke up), and Y/n felt the smallest pang of pity before a knock sounded on the bedroom door.

"Are you two awake?" Her mother questioned, likely wanting to know if they wanted tea. Y/n clambered out of bed and leaned against the door.

"Uh, I am," she whispered. "Lock- Anthony's still asleep."

"Right, well do you think he'll want a cup of tea? I'm heading down to make a pot now."

"Oh, yeah. He has it weird though, with sugar and honey."

"I'll pop those on the tray, then, and he can put in what he wants."

"Thanks Mum." She heard her mother shuffle and head down the stairs, knees clicking as she went, and turned back to look at her fake boyfriend. "Fuck," she said, a horrible realisation dawning on her. Lockwood couldn't be in the armchair when her mother brought in the tea, or she'd wonder if they'd had an argument. Walking over, she gave his arm a quick prod.

No response.

She tried again, harder this time, and when he stirred a little she cheered internally. "Lockwood?" she whisper-shouted, giving him a proper shove.

"What? What is it?" He was bolt upright almost immediately, scanning for any signs of danger and reaching for Y/n. "Is everything alright?"

"Uh... yes," she said slowly. "Mum's making tea, and when she brings it in you can't be in the chair or she'll have questions." She stared down at his hand where it was grabbing her pyjama top (an old oversized t-shirt), his knuckles white. "You... you can let go of me now, Lockwood."

"Oh. Right." He retracted his hand, but not before letting it hover in the space between them for a few seconds. He stood up, the blanket falling, and Y/n immediately turned around.

"Why are you naked?!"

"I am not! I got hot in the night so I took my pyjamas off! I still have my pants on, thank you very much!"

"Well put your pyjamas back on!" she shrieked, pressing her hands over her face (despite still having her back to him) and desperately hoping she could delete the image from her brain. She had thought he'd only taken his top off, but since he wore matching pyjamas the pile of clothes on the table had looked like one thing, not two. She could hear him hopping around while he attempted to quickly pull his trousers on, and after a minute or so he cleared his throat.

"Alright, I'm dressed." Y/n turned around slowly, scared that he was joking, and sighed in relief when she realised that he wasn't. "Such a drama queen," he muttered under his breath, clearly not wanting her to hear as he looked to his left with a red face.

"I am not a drama queen, Lockwood. If anybody is the drama queen it's you. Now get in the bed." She pointed at it, glare on her face.

"If you wanted me to sleep with you you could have let me do that last night," he smirked, and she threw a decorative pillow at him.

"Just get in the bed, Lockwood." She went to grab a second pillow when he wriggled his eyebrows at her, and he quickly stopped and pulled back the covers. When he was finally settled she climbed in next to him.

"Y/n."

"What?"

"You should probably come a bit closer." He wasn't wrong, since they were as far away from each other as they could get, but she stubbornly refused to cosy up to him when she didn't need to just yet.

"Hang on." She'd spotted the blanket still crumpled on the floor, and hurried to pick it up just as she heard her mother coming up the stairs. Chucking it over the armchair she rushed back to the bed, pulling the duvet over her just as the door opened.

"Fuck's sake, come here," Lockwood whispered, harshly tugging on her arm and then wrapping his arm around her waist. "Ah, good morning, Emma!"

"Morning! Just got some tea for you here," she put the tray down on Y/n's bedside table and paused for a moment as she took in the two of them in the bed. "How did you sleep? Hopefully you feel rested enough for today?"

"Oh I slept beautifully, thank you." Lockwood beamed up at Emma, and Y/n wondered if she knew that his fingers were stroking the skin of her stomach under her top where it had ridden up.

"I'm glad to hear it! Well, I'll leave you to it!" They both smiled until Y/n's mother was out of the room, but as soon as the door clicked shut behind her they shot away from each other.

"I hope we never have to do that again."

"We'll have to do it tomorrow morning, darling."

"Nobody else is here, you don't need to keep calling me that."

"Ah, yes. Sorry, Schmoopie."

"I hate you. I'm going to poison your tea." She was getting the mugs ready now, adding extra honey to one and pouring in the water over the tea bags.

"And I will happily drink it."

A few minutes later (she'd had to let the tea stew for a bit) she poured in the milk and handed over his mug.

"Did you add in the sugar?"

"Yep."

"And the honey?"

"You watched me do it, Lockwood."

"Right, yes. I did." He was quiet for a moment, staring into the contents of his mug. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," she replied, mild shock running through her at the sincerity of his gratitude.

They drank their tea in silence.

~~~

"So, just to recap, there are around fifty people coming over today?"

"Yep," Y/n said through a mouthful of cereal. "All extended family members and close family friends and their families. I've been thinking about it, and as much as it pains me to say it I think... ugh," she scowled into her bowl. "I think you're right abo-"

"Ha! Finally! I got you to say it! About what?"

"If you'd let me finish, you would know, idiot."

"Oh, yes. Sorry."

"I think you're right about needing to do a big speech to everyone all in one go about..." she gestured between the two of them vaguely, "us."

"Ah. Yes, it would save a lot of time, wouldn't it?"

"Hm, it would. And then we only have to remember things once really."

"Remind me again what the story was?" They were sat in the kitchen, the only ones up other than Y/n's mother (who was upstairs getting things ready).

"What was 8 months ago?"

"Why 8 months?" Lockwood frowned over his second mug of tea that morning.

"Because that's what I told Steph last night."

"Oh. Uh, April I think? There was that one job we went on in March, just the two of us. We could stick pretty close to the truth then if we used that as a death scare that made you realise that you couldn't possibly live without me."

"Wasn't the story that you realised you were hopelessly in love with me one day and asked me out, but I refused multiple times until eventually I gave in to get you to shut up?"

"Well, yes. But I just think that- morning, Stephanie." His smile was clearly forced, and Y/n realised with a start that she was beginning to be able to tell which of his smiles were real.

"Morning you two. Hopefully you didn't get too frisky last night after that adorable kiss under the mistletoe!"

"No, we-"

"Well, a gentleman doesn't kiss and tell, Stephanie," Lockwood smirked, and Y/n rolled her eyes at his interruption. Her cousin was lapping it up, and after a few minutes the kitchen was filled with various members of Y/n's family as they all filed in, bleary eyed and reaching for tea and coffee. They would have to figure out their story while they got ready for the party, since they definitely couldn't get details straight with so many people in the room.

"Morning, Squeak," her brother Will murmured as he sat on a stool next to her at the counter. Y/n scoffed at the nickname, but there was nothing resentful behind it. "Sleep alright?"

"Yeah, did you?" He nodded in response as he started shovelling mouthfuls of cereal in, the bowl nearly spilling over with the amount of food in it.

"Lover boy didn't give you too much grief last night, did he?"

"No, he was alright."

"Hey, if you need a break at any point today come and find me, yeah? I'll fend off any inquisitive relatives."

"Thanks, Will." He was only a couple of years older than her, being the third youngest of her brothers, but Will liked to act as though he was the oldest of all of the L/n siblings. In fairness Tom was eleven and Sam and John who were thirty and twenty-eight respectively were rarely home or in contact with her, and she didn't have as much of a bond with them. Olivia was a year younger than Y/n, but since they had shared a room growing up they had fought consistently over the years about completely irrelevant things and barely talked outside of gatherings.

"Anytime. I think me and the boys were gonna take your lover boy away at some point to give him the proper talk, so if you can't find any of us later that'll be why."

"Please stop calling him 'lover boy', Will," she grimaced, not noticing Lockwood come up behind her.

"But I am your lover boy, darling." She whipped her head around to see Lockwood leaning against the counter next to her with a soft smile.

Weird. She'd thought he would be smirking instead.

Will snorted, then tipped his bowl up to drink the last of the milk. "You two," he said after he'd finished, "are quite possibly the most sickening thing I have ever seen."

~~~

"Is a suit too much, do you think?"

"Maybe leave the tie," Y/n called out from the bathroom where she was getting changed. She had long since pulled on the burgundy dress, but not knowing when Lockwood would be in a state where she could walk out meant that she had spent the last five minutes staring at her reflection in the mirror. She was absolutely certain that multiple people would make comments about her figure, or compare her to Stephanie, or both, and she was dreading leaving the bathroom. Then there would be the comments about her job, and how being an agent was a terrible choice and she should have gone into full-time education instead.

"Y/n? You can come out when you're ready."

She sighed shakily, taking one last look at herself in the mirror above the sink before unlocking the door and stepping out.

Lockwood was in one of his usual suits, pink socks poking out from under his trousers, and he was just sorting out his cuffs when he looked up and froze. When he still didn't say anything Y/n's mind started racing ahead to all the different possibilities.

"I look awful, don't I? I'll get my jeans and jumper and get changed, give me a minute."

"No!" Lockwood shouted, his arms outstretched. He hesitated, then spoke again, and his voice was back to how it sounded when he was being an arse. "No, don't do that, just... you look fine like that and we'll be late if you get changed now."

"Oh. Alright." She frowned, wrapping her arms around her midriff as she inspected Lockwood's outfit. "Wait, don't move," she called out when he went to move. Y/n walked over to him, then reached up to straighten out his collar. It had been sticking up, so she smoothed her hands over it to right it, letting them linger on his chest afterwards. He wasn't moving, and she was quite sure that he wasn't breathing either, and when she looked up at him she realised that she was holding her breath too.

They hadn't been this close since they kissed the night before, and then they'd had an audience.

Now it was just the two of them, alone in the room.

"Y/n?" Lockwood asked, his voice slightly hoarse.

"Yeah?" Had his face moved closer? Suddenly she could make out the individual colours in his eyes and was able to count the freckles on his cheeks. He licked his lips, tilting his head slightly to brush his nose against hers, and she felt her eyes fluttering closed.

"Are you two nearly ready? Emma needs help getting food and things ready for the guests!" A loud knock accompanied the shrill voice of Y/n's Aunt Linda, and the pair of them sprang apart, clearing their throats and avoiding eye contact. Y/n marched over to the door and wrenched it open, plastering a smile on her warm face.

"We're ready! Anthony? You coming?"

"Yeah, just... I'll be down in a minute, darling. I just need to use the loo." He flashed the two women a smile, then disappeared into the en-suite. Y/n could have killed him for leaving her alone, but maybe that was for the best given what had just happened.

"Come on then," Linda said, and ushered her downstairs.

~~~

Everyone was busy doing something, and everything was in complete chaos.

"Oh, that can go over there. Tom, don't put that in your mouth, please. No, over there, Ben. Tom! Not in your mouth! You're eleven, this shouldn't be difficult! Boys, please stop mucking about and do something useful! Over there- oh for god's sake, give it here!" Y/n's mother snatched a plate of food away from her husband, rushing between the kitchen and the dining room that was through the open double doors off to the side. The whole area would be brimming with guests in less than thirty minutes, and things were still being put out. "Oh, you're here, that's perfect. Where's Anthony? Never mind, no time. Here, you can put this next to the thingy there!" Luckily Y/n had grown up with her mother's distracted way of talking and knew exactly what she meant, taking the opportunity to run away from Linda.

The next ten minutes followed the same pattern of being handed things and told to put them in various spots on the table, and Lockwood was nowhere to be seen for any of it. Y/n was starting to worry that he'd flushed his skinny beanpole of a frame down the toilet.

"Where's your boyfriend, Y/n?" Stephanie asked, sidling up in a stunning silver dress that looked as though it had been painted on her.

"In the toilet. Are you gonna help, Steph?"

"Oh, you're... wearing that again?" she asked, ignoring Y/n's tired request for help. "Didn't you wear that last year? You've put on a bit of weight since then, haven't you!" She let out a laugh, and Y/n brought her arms around her stomach self-consciously for the second time since putting on the dress. Maybe she should have ignored Lockwood and got changed anyway. At least then when people complained about her outfit she'd be more comfortable in her own body. "Well, personally I think you should get it let out a little, Y/n. You do look awfully-"

"Beautiful?" a voice questioned from Y/n's right, and after a second someone else's arms were around her waist, pulling her back against a warm chest. "She does look stunning, doesn't she?"

"Anthony," Y/n breathed when he spun her around to face him, his hands holding hers tightly. He was smiling one of those private smiles reserved for the people he cared about, small and gentle, and her heart jumped in her chest.

"I... I suppose," Stephanie said, sounding confused. It was so typical of her to not think of her cousin as anything other than a way to make herself look better. Y/n barely noticed when her cousin drifted off, or when her brother picked up his camera and took a photo of the two of them framed by the lights that had been draped over the doorframe, since all she could focus on was the feel of her hands being held by Lockwood and the way he was looking at her.

"Aww, aren't they just adorable!" Y/n's grandmother Jean said loudly, catching the attention of everybody nearby. Apparently half of the guests had arrived on time (of course the one time that happened was the time she had to pull off a huge fake dating stunt), because the kitchen and dining room were packed with people. Murmurs of assent travelled around, and Y/n could hear a few people questioning who the tall young man next to her was, and suddenly her heart was plummeting rather than jumping, and she felt sick.

"Hey," Lockwood whispered, still smiling at her. "We can do this, alright? It's only today and most of tomorrow, and then we're back in London. It's really not that long when you think about it."

He needed to stop being nice to her, because it was freaking her out.

One minute he was saying she looked fine and not seeming to care much about what she looked like, and the next he was declaring that she was beautiful and stunning with such sincerity that she couldn't help but think it was real.

"So this is the boyfriend Linda told us about, huh?" one guest asked.

"Um... yes," Y/n replied, moving closer to Lockwood and curling into his side, trying not to look too stiff and petrified when his arm came around her side. "This is Anthony." She gestured up at him, feeling increasingly uncomfortable about the fact that around thirty people all had their eyes on her, and any one of them could work out that this relationship was a farce and completely destroy any good reputation that she had amongst her family.

"How did it all start? Go on, give us the story!" somebody called out.

"Yeah, we all want to know!" exclaimed a different voice. "Y/n/n's never had a boyfriend before!"

Y/n shared a glance with Lockwood, and he opened his mouth to speak.

part 5

Tag list (I think this is everyone): @ahead-fullofdreams, @aislinrayne, @anathemaloren, @augustisintheair, @avdiobliss, @aysha4life, @briar-rose23, @curseofhecate, @dangelnleif, @edible-rat-vomit, @el-de-phi, @ell0ra-br3kk3r, @fearlessmoony, @fudosl, @informedimagining, @karensirkobabes, @locklyebrainrot, @locknco, @mentallyillsodapop, @mischivana, @mitskiswift99, @mrsklockwood, @mrsyixingunicorn10, @newbooksmell777, @no-morning-glories, @novelizt, @ran23sblog, @star-of-velaris, @superpositvecloudshipper, @t2sh0, @taygrls, @tournesol77, @whenselenefallsinlove, @wordsarelife

let me know if you want to be added to/removed from the tag list! <3

[sweetenerobert]

HEY THERE, CITY BOY

ghostface!joel miller x dad!male reader

genre: neighbor joel, no outbreak au, explicit, minors dni

summary: joel’s possessive/dark side comes out after finding out your going out on a date

warnings:strong language, threatening, dark!joel, possessive!joel, stalking, forced cuckhold, dacryphilia, face fucking, infidelity, knife play (knife gets put to your throat), joel is 40, reader is 38, unprotected P in A, dirty talk, oral (m giving), pet names,, creampies

word count: 4.1k

a/n: how this idea came to life was i was watching like ten minutes of scream and i texted @morallyinept about it and here I am. Hope you guys like it!, dividers by @saradika also HAPPY HALLOWEEN

October 23rd Austin, Texas Miller Residence

Marigold and Sarah were in Sarah’s room, conversing with one another in her bedroom, snacking away on various sweets and chips—typical high school girl conversations: classes, tests, drama, boys — and eventually family members.

Joel had passed Sarah’s room, hearing the hushed whispers from the two teenage girls in his daughter's bedroom. Joel had no interest in learning about what Kelsie said to Anthony or why Johnny and Matthew fought in the cafeteria. But he was interested in what Marigold knew about her father — his city boy.

He tried to keep the floor from whining under his foot as he pressed his ear against Sarah’s bedroom door. Joel knew this broke the privacy/boundaries rule, but he was eager to learn what was happening with you.

“So… anything new with your dad? Is he still seeing that guy?” Sarah asked, chewing on a gummy worm.

“I notice my dad’s happier. It’s adorable, ever since he broke up with that one guy, my dad deserves the distraction from work and the real world,” Marigold explains.

“Supposedly, they’re supposed to go out on the thirty-first.”

“Ironic, it's a spooky season, and they’re going out that day specifically?” Sarah asks.

Marigold shrugs and chuckles. “That’s my dad for ya’ always gotta have fun with dates.”

Sarah laughs. But Joel was seething behind Sarah’s door, that his anger could make Sarah’s door burst. He hated seeing you with anyone else — especially finding out that you were happy and Joel wasn't the reason why it made him want to explode.

But Joel had a better idea.

October 25th Austin, Texas Your Living Room

You had finished work at the bakery today — finished a lot of orders, and you just wanted to lounge around the living room. You realized you were home when you noticed how scary-quiet the house was when you first walked in. You guessed that Marigold must be hanging out with Sarah — hence the quiet atmosphere in your house. You shrug your shoulders and grab the TV remote on the coffee table. Turning the TV on and just browsing until you found a show you liked.

Your mind wandered off to Joel, and you hated yourself for thinking about him. You broke up with him because all the hiding and lying became too much for you to handle. It constantly stressed you out, so you did the mature thing and broke it off. You shook your head from any thoughts of Joel and focused on the luminescent screen before you.

Hearing your phone ring in your pocket made you roll your eyes. Muting the TV, digging your phone out of your pocket, and seeing the caller ID read 'UNKNOWN' made you uneasy. "If anything from the city taught you anything, never answer the unknown numbers. Could be robo calls." You mutter.

Hitting the decline button and throwing on the cushion next to you. You kept your concentration on the TV and tried to ignore the outside world.

Ring, Ring

Hearing your phone ring made you groan. "Mare, this better be you." Seeing the same ID reading 'UNKNOWN' this time, you swallowed that uneasy feeling and hit the accept button, bringing the phone next to your ear. "Hello," You spoke.

"Hello." You heard a voice you'd never heard before. It sounded gravelly and hoarse at the same time. Made your body feel cold the second you heard it. "Hello?" It came out more like a question than a statement.

"Who is this?"

"Oh, you might just have the wrong number then." You completely disregarded their question.

"Maybe. Sorry to waste your time."

"I get it. Maybe you were in a rush? It happens to me all the time as well," You dismiss.

"S' my fault. I was trying to dial a number from memory. Musta’ typed the wrong numbers in different places."

You start chuckling at his confession. "Sorry, that was rude to laugh at that."

"S'fine, your laugh is cute." You blush at his statement.

"Um, anyway, I'll let you go now —" You start.

"Wait. I wanna keep talkin' to you." The voice admits.

"Really? I think the other person's waiting for you to call them back.”

“I wanna keep hearin’ your voice.”

“How come? It’s not the most attractive thing I ever heard.”

“Cause I want to know what your voice sounds like when your throat’s been slit.”

Hearing that confession made your skin get cold — goosebumps traveling you, your hands clammy, your body felt heavy. It felt like time shut down. You quickly hung up the phone and breathed as if your life depended on it as you looked at your idle phone lying on the cushion.

“Who —breath— the hell —breath— was that?”

October 27th Austin, Texas Your Kitchen/Bedroom

Your ex-wife had come to visit you and Marigold, and Marigold was ecstatic. You’d decided to make dinner for both girls in your life. You hadn't heard from the creepy voice in a day, and you relived thinking it was all some stupid prank played by some teenager who somehow got a hold of your number.

As you’d finished making the dish and making plates for your two girls, you heard your phone ring on the table. “Hey, Dad. Someone’s calling you. Want me to answer it?”

“Uh. I got it. Let me put this pan back on the stove,” You shouted. Placing the pan back on the now-off-stovetop, wipe your hands on your clothes as you jog to grab your phone. Holding your phone, you feel your heart sink as the caller ID reads ‘UNKNOWN’ again.

You wanted to throw your phone, Bury it — hell, burn it. But you didn't want to draw attention to yourself. “It’s no one important.” You smirk and shove your phone in your pocket — declining the call.

Settling with your plate on the table, you are ready to dig in, but that's when you hear your ringtone muffled in your pocket. Your ex and Marigold hear it, too.

“Dad, it seems important if they had called you again — answer it,” Marigold nods.

You didn't want your daughter to witness fear in her father’s eyes. You didn't wish Marigold to be in fear for seeing the worry running all over your face. You didn't want to answer the phone but already knew they were persistent.

“Okay,” You breathed, shakily — trying to hide it.

You stood up from your seat, pecked your lips on Marigold’s forehead, and walked towards your bedroom — answering the phone and pressing it to your ear.

“Hey there, city boy. I was gettin’ impatient.”

“What do you want from me? Threaten me some more?” You questioned.

“I didn't know you swung that way. Do you get turned on by someone threatenin’ you?”

“Shut the fuck up,” You spat. “What do you want from me?”

“You should watch your tone if you're a father; how would your daughter react, knowing er’ father has a sailor's mouth?”

“You know nothing about me,” You seethed. You were making a fist with your free hand — so hard you could draw blood with your nails. “I’m done talking to you, goodbye.”

“If you hang up, I swear I will bust down that door and slash your daughters and wife’s throats and gut them like the fish they are.”

His threat made all the color drain from your body; your knees were wobbly — your throat felt clogged — and the ability to breathe became impossible. You felt powerless when you heard your daughter and ex-wife were in danger.

“Oh, what happened?” The voice mockingly cooed. “All bark but no bite?” He knew his threat made you feel powerless — weak.

“Fuck you, you want me motherfucker? Come and get me,” You snapped, ending the phone call and throwing your phone on the bed, shaking your head to get rid of the anger seething through your body.

Once you finally calmed down, you walked towards the kitchen, seeing the two best people to make your anger finally sizzle away.

“You guys talked about me while I’m gone?”

“Yeah, Mare was just telling me that you met someone new. Tell us about him.”

October 31st Austin, Texas Your Bedroom/Living Room

You were currently pacing back and forth in a white tank top, your boxers and your socks being calf height. Your phone is propped up against your dresser as your best friend, Jett, watches you pace.

“You’re annoying me with all that pacing,” Jett comments. You rub a hand down your face in an attempt to calm yourself down. “Better, now?” Jett asks.

“Nope,” You state, pacing again.

“You're stressing yourself out for nothing; he’ll like you. What’s the big deal?” Jett shrugs.

“It's because I’ve never gone out on a date since I came out. So I’m just nervous as all hell. Should I tell him I’m sick? I’m going to tell him I’m sick.” You nod, grabbing your phone, but Jett’s voice bellows through the phone, shouting protests.

“If you as so much as cancel on him, I will waste my tank of gas and smack the shit out of you and then leave.”

“You live an hour away,” You commented.

“And? What’s the issue?”

You shake your head. “Look,” You start, placing your phone back in its original place. “We’ve hung out before — and that’s all it’s been, hanging out, but I feel like I could blow this whole thing up.

“If I could smack some sense into you through this phone, I would,” Jett spoke.

“Thanks for the vote of confidence,” You smirk, crossing your arms.

“If a guy goes through all this trouble to finally stop just using you for sex and actually wants to be in a committed relationship with you, what does that insinuate?”

“He’s desperate because no other man was willing to give it up that easy? You shrug.

Jett slides a hand down her face in annoyance, hearing her best friend. "It means he's genuinely interested in you, dummy. Allow him to show his vulnerability.”

“Who are you, and what have you done to my best friend?” You ask.

Jett rolls her eyes and flips her middle finger at you.” “Fuck off,” She chuckles. "When is he coming?"

You shrug. "He said that he would be here —" You started. You heard the doorbell go off downstairs. "Who's that?" Jett questioned.

"Lemme go see. Talk to you later, Jett."

"Bye," Jett states, hanging the phone up. Walking out to your living room, you felt anxious. This pit in your stomach rose to your throat as you walked downstairs. Then your thoughts rose back when you thought about the unknown caller.

You were freaking out if he was on the other side of the door, waiting for you — like predators do to their prey and waiting for the opportunity to pounce.

As you stood in front of the wooden door before you, your breath started to shudder. Gripping the doorknob made the feeling of breathing — unbearable.

Somehow getting enough oxygen in your lungs and pushing out carbon dioxide, you twist the knob and pull the door towards you. You push a breath of air as you notice your date, Hugo. You could feel your muscles lose their tension as your hand was the door.

Hugo had auburn hair matching his full auburn beard. He wore the same brown bomber jacket when you first met him, wearing blue jeans and black boots. You smiled when you noticed the smile riding his face. "Hey, I thought you weren't going to be here until 7," You shrugged.

"I wanted to surprise you. Did I come too early?" Hugo asks.

"Well, you never do that," You start, and Hugo chortles. "But, I was stressing about this whole night. Never been on a date before."

"Never?" Hugo asks.

"Well, in the sense of with another man. I guess I was questioning if you actually liked me," You confessed.

Hugo stepped closer to you — towering over you with his height. In one swoop, he manages to lift you up — wrapping your legs around his waist, you chuckle. Walking into your living room, Hugo closes the door with his foot. Hearing the door slam made you feel like a teenager in love.

Your lips made contact with his as your hands traveled through his hair. His hands were on your waist like a puzzle piece — perfectly placed into shape. Hugo lays you down on the couch; his body melts through your tank top.

His kisses trail down your neck like a spider crawling down your skin. His mustache tickles your neck — making goosebumps travel down your body. You grab his face and bring your lips back onto yours — tangled together, lips trying to connect but can't find the exact shape. With each kiss, it gets more passionate — intense, fireworks exploding inside your brain.

As you wrapped your hand in the strands of his hair, his hands slid from your waist onto the inner bend of your knee, holding your leg, driving his hard-covered cock into yours.

Your mind drifted away from Hugo, and you thought of Joel. How he would have one hand on your throat and the other on your leg would be lifted just like this. You hated that you thought of him, in this moment, with someone you moved on from.

“Wait, Hugo,” You breathed.

Hugo backs away from you, sitting up. Watching you breathe heavily on your back. “Are you okay?”

You nod as you feel the cotton under your head. “Yeah. Just lemme find something to wear.” You fix your position so that you're sitting next to Hugo.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what? I understand. You want to save the best for last,” Hugo winks, and you chuckle. You stand up, and you walk up the stairs towards your bedroom. Opening the door and closing it behind you, you lean on the door and manage to catch your breath. Hugo was your future. Why were you thinking about your past with Joel? You hated that Joel infiltrated your mind like a bad memory.

Closing your eyes and trying to collect your thoughts as you thought about Joel. Your phone rang, and you opened your eyes, exhaled a long breath, grabbed your phone, and hit the green answer button reflectively.

“Hello there, city boy.”

You noticed that their tone sounded angry, frustrated, and pissed. It made you feel have the memory of being a kid scolded by a parent.

“Hello?” You shrugged.

“Your such a fuckin’ whore, you know that?”

“Thanks, I guess. Where is this coming from?” You questioned.

“You’ll find out soon enough, baby boy. Trust me.”

The phone line went dead. You looked at your phone in confusion and disbelief. Ultimately, you ignored those feelings as you shoved your headphones and blasted music into your ears as you glanced around your closet, trying to find an outfit.

October 31st Austin, Texas Living Room

As you walked down the stairs, you felt chipper and happy. As the music drowned your ears earlier, you forgot about the voice and Joel altogether. “Okay, Hugo. Are you ready to have the best date ever or—”

“Oh my god!” You exclaimed—the sight before you shook you to your core. Seeing Hugo beat up, bruises littering his face and neck, and cuts all around his body as If he looks like a cutting board. His arms and legs are tied to a chair in your kitchen and placed in the middle of the living room like a trophy, and a piece of duct tape covers his lips.

You cup your hands over your mouth and immediately rush to Hugo’s aid. You kneel in front of him, trying to untie his restraints. “I’m sorry I didn't hear you, Hugo. I was playing music — fuckin’ Mare introducing me to alternative music.”

Hugo was saying something under the tape, but you couldn't understand what he was saying. You glanced up at him. You can see his eyes almost pop out of your head — he was trying to warn you, but you couldn't tell what was happening.

“Shh, I promise you’ll be okay. You have nothing to worry —”

Your head immediately jerked back as a firm grip was on your hair as you were being dragged away from Hugo. You can hear muffled protest through the tape. You tried to fight back — smack the grip in your locks but ended up feeling a cut on your knuckle.

Feeling the pulling stop, you tried to crawl away, but the grip was still tight as the hand made you stay upright on your knees. You see a shiny object in the corner of your eye. From looking at Hugo, you can see the fear in his eyes.

In your field of view, you see a large hunting knife near your eye as the figure taunts you. Placing the knife near your throat — terrifying Hugo. “You know, I really shouldn't enjoy how much this turns me on, city boy; seein’ this asshole tied up as you're forced on your knees does it for me — more than I should admit.”

“You're a fucking sicko,” You spat.

You hiss as you feel the blade press up against your neck deeper, cutting slight skin tissue. “Careful what you say. One wrong move, and I could cut that pretty throat.”

You could see Hugo seeth with anger. He kept bouncing in the chair like a bull when it saw red. “Oh, asshole doesn't like it when I threaten his boy — oh, sorry. My boy.”

“Maybe we should give im’ a show, city boy. Turn around, or I'll cut your throat.” You take a breath as you slowly turn around on your knees and see the face of the voice that’s been tormenting you for the past couple of days — the mask of the voice.

White plastic with elongated eyes and a long elongated mouth, the sight made your stomach churn as he held up a knife to your throat. With his other free hand, he slips the bottom half of the long cloak he was wearing down, and you see his hardened cock flop out. You felt bile rise to your throat as you looked at the eyes of the mask.

“Suck.” That was all you heard before you wrapped your mouth around the tip. Your mouth slowly kept going back and forth as you heard grunts from the voice above you. You wanted to get this over with. You didn't know what this person’s intentions were after you were done, but you hoped you and Hugo would be alive at the end.

“C’mon. That’s how you suck? I’m gettin’ bored.”

His free hand grabs your hair as he thrusts his hips towards you. With each thrust, you could feel the cock in your mouth twitch, causing your throat to gag and tears start to fall from your eyes. “Oh baby, that’s a sight; you look so perfect with your tears slidin’ down your face.” His thrusts became more animal-like and more of your tears kept slipping down your face as more gags escaped your throat.

“Baby, I could shoot my cum in that throat right now,” He starts. He pulls your face away from his cock as you take a deep breath and start coughing — catching your breath. “But I’d rather cum in that pretty ass of yours,” He states, grabbing your chin. In one motion, he causes you to turn away from him and make you land on your hands. You glance up at Hugo, and you notice his eyes read, ‘I'm sorry, there’s nothing I can do,’ it makes your heart tear a bit.

No warning, you feel your pants slide from your ass, and his cock slip inside you, and you scream in pleasure, but it sounds like a pain to you. His thrusts were quick, rough, and something you missed when you were Hugo. You couldn't tell if you loved or hated this feeling as much as you denied it was happening. “Damn, baby. You're so fuckin’ tight. He might not fuck as good as I do.”

“Fuck off,” You pant. A hard yank to your hair as you’re near the mask sends shivers down your spine. “Nah, I’m too busy, fuckin’ you.” Your head being in the position it was, you got a clear view of Hugo’s face. You can see the sadness littering his eyes. “Aww, how sad. He must know that he can't satisfy you the way I can,” The voice panted.

Your nails could’ve made scratches into the wooden floor under you. Your neck could crack if he kept pulling you like this. He could kill you if he wanted to. You could feel the cold blade press up against your neck. You were scared, but your cock kept betraying you. Deep down in your gut, you had a feeling that you knew who this was under the mask, but you couldn't pinpoint who exactly yet.

“Baby, you gonna cum?”

“N-” You tried to state, but they cut you off, feeling the knife press deeper. “Before you start bullshitin’ me. Remember, I can kill you right here and your pretty boy toy, too. Now, baby, are you going to cum?”

You wanted to lie, even if you knew if you were going to die. But you couldn't handle the idea of Marigold growing up with a dad — the idea of Marigold being the one to find you crept through your head through his threat.

You nod your head and close your eyes. “Good, me too.” He grunts. His thrust made loud claps with your ass. Each thrust jerked you forward and pushed the knife press a little deeper into your neck. It was like he was on a mission, and he was each thrust closer to completing his mission.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum,” You spat.

“Cum for me, baby. Cum for Ghostface, baby.”

You exclaim as you feel your cum release itself from the chamber you had hidden from. “Fuck, baby. I’m gonna get you pregnant. Here it comes.” You hear the voice exclaim and thrust himself deeper inside you. As he lets go of your hair, you collapse on the floor, your arms lying on either side of you. You could feel his cum swim out of you as you lay on the floor — exhausted.

He gets up, fixes his cloak, stands up, walks towards Hugo, and bends his face to lean closer. “You upset that I made him cum with my cock and not yours?”

Hugo roars, hearing that question. He curses the man in front of him out as much as he can with tape plastered over his mouth. “Ugh, I’m getting sick of this.” He brings his fist up, connecting with Hugo’s jaw, and that makes Hugo’s head go limp. Taking a breath, Ghostface stands above you, watching as you take deep breaths on the floor.

“Please tell me y’know who this is.”

“Joel,” You answer flat.

“How?”

“The way the voice called me city boy, you did it as if I was going to be punished — like the old days,” You admitted.

You heard Joel chuckle as he helped you up off the floor. You stared into the eyes of the man who threatened you, held a knife against your throat, and overall gave you an orgasm you’ve been craving for so long. You push the mask off his face, and you see the same grin you're used to seeing. “Why didn't you try to fight back, hell, even bite my dick off?”

You crossed your arms and looked at Joel. “Would it be wrong to admit I just wanted an orgasm?”

Joel chuckles and shakes his head. “You're a sicko.”

“Says the jealous man, who threatened me for a couple of days — made me paranoid and just fucked me in front of my date. Yeah, I’m the sicko.”

Joel shakes his head as you laugh at him. You look at the clock near your wall and notice it read 7 o’clock.

“Damn, it's seven already. How long do you think you knocked out Hugo?”

“Probably got a glass jaw, an hour at most.”

“Wanna join me in the shower for old time's sake?”

“I’ll follow the leader this one time.”

You start walking the best you can with Joel on your tail. And you turn around on the stairs, and you stop. “What do you think you're doing?”

“Followin’ you.”

“Without the mask? You used to be smarter than you look.” You start walking up the stairs as Joel walks down the stairs, grabbing the mask and glancing at the knife on the floor and grabbing it, too.

“You actin’ smart, city boy. I’ll show you what I do to smart boys.”

[historicalharbor]

Unmasked - Bridgerton Season 3 Part 2 Trailer

In the first four episodes, over 2.3 billion minutes were viewed.  The highest debut weekend in history for any Netflix show, the historical drama was filled with romance, action, and comedic endeavors. The first part focuses on the romantic story of Colin and Penelope, while the second part will explore the mystery and unmasking of all the personas introduced in the first part.  To say we are ravenous for the final episodes is an understatement.

"What is concealed, shall be revealed"

A New Betrothal

Everyone in the Bridgerton family is excited about Colin and Penelope's upcoming wedding, except for one member. Let's be honest, Violet had already practically picked out the stationery. In like manner, during season 2 when Anthony calls on the Bridgerton family to help him "woo" Edwina, Penelope is in the drawing room. Undoubtedly, she is like another sister, and the brothers joking that Anthony may need to fight a duel for her speaks to her connection to the family.

The fact that the Featheringtons found out about the betrothal through Lady Whistledown speaks volumes. Albion Finch, always the supportive brother-in-law, clearly deserves the Brother-in-law of the Year award. I must admit, I enjoyed seeing the sisters' surprise and his smile. On the contrary, Portia didn't seem pleased. Undoubtedly, a lot was going on after the, ahem, carriage. Finding out that your youngest is marrying the best out of the three, and you didn't know about it, is likely to cause conflict.  Portia also appears unhappy after two seasons of trying to finally get her connection with the Bridgerton family -- and she isn't happy about it.  On the bright side, this means she's the next Catherine the Great, right?

The Reward

 "Whistledown is power."

As Penelope is finally making progress towards marital bliss, the issue of the Queen and Lady Whistledown remains unresolved. Over the past three seasons, the Queen has been trying to find Lady Whistledown but has been unsuccessful. She has even offered a reward of five thousand pounds to anyone who can uncover Lady Whistledown's identity. The clock shown multiple times in the new clip suggests that time may be running out. The question remains: what will the Queen do with the information once she finds Lady Whistledown?

Last season, when Eloise was discovered by the Queen and pulled into the carriage, we got an idea of just what she might do with the power that Whistledown may bring. Whistledown, with influence, was able to bring down Nigel Burbrook in Season 1. She has released some pretty risky stuff. If that power was in the wrong hands, it could be troublesome.  On the other hand, just the knowledge of who the penned author is, the Queen may respect Penelope. Only time will tell, and that is 9 days to be exact.

What are you looking forward to most in Bridgerton Season 3 Part 2?

By Mary The Traveler

[human-sweater-vest]

okay so we’ve seen glenn and ron so far in season two and they’ve been kind of what I expected.

glenn is pretty much the same as he was season one. it makes sense, he’s set in his whole thing, he’s vibing in hell with morgan and is sporting the same chill stoner vibes as before. the notable thing with him was that there wasn’t really animosity between him and nick (which also makes sense given their whole deal in season one). he’s always been far removed and it makes sense that in season two he’s still rockin with it.

ron then was a really touching surprise because he continued to grow as a person (insert beth may snickering here). he connected easily with scary and hit me like a fucking freight train with the line about him being sorry that she didn’t realize that losing terry jr. was her loss too. he’s this strange intermediary between the men in their family because willy took advantage of her needing someone to validate her pain, terry jr. was seen as a cause of it and therefore couldn’t help ease it truly (until things were too late), and then ron is here being his odd little self and extends sympathy to her because he also lost terry jr. and can understand. kudos to beth for ep. 41 because she rode the line between comedy and genuinely heartfelt and deep emotional moments like a champ.

and now here’s where we turn to speculation:

I’ve seen a lot of folks saying they’re worried about henry (and I feel like he’s probably going to warrant that because duh, it all comes back to the oak family when it comes to the doodler). however! my first point here is that we shouldn’t ignore darryl.

I feel like we see the most thought going into the oaks (and again, rightfully so, will and anthony are serving us trauma and drama on a platter) and I think one of the sacrifices with that comes at the extent of the wilson boys. the darryl/grant arc was the first time I really, truly got what dndads was all about. specifically, matt’s incredible line where darryl is replying to the other dads saying that he should showcase vulnerability to grant with darryl snapping and saying that he can’t be fully honest because he’s putting on a brave face because he doesn’t know if they’ll make it out and if he and carol will even stay together if they do. that line then contrasted later when he says that if grant asks him a question he’ll do his best to answer truthfully which allows for the big emotional connection they were lacking.

the wilson father/son relationship hinges on the idea of not being able to love the pain away and we see that extend into the next generation in a deeply tragic way. grant can’t make his mental illness magically disappear by loving his son despite how badly he clearly wants to. he can’t “we’ll talk about it later” his way into a healthy relationship where he’s able to offer his son both stability and truth. he’s fucked up and traumatized and never fully dealt with things and he’s dealing with the ramifications.

so how do we think darryl feels about that? how do we think darryl would feel knowing that he couldn’t love away grant’s mental illness (which isn’t something you can do, but he feels immensely guilty about in season one) and seeing the disastrous effect it had on the relationship between his son and grandson to the point where linc no longer refers to him as a dad? I personally really do think that he’ll act as a balm between the two and finally provide that space for them to become father and son again.

there’s truly so much I could say on the wilson family because I’m fascinated by the transition between the most stereotypically masculine family dynamic to a queered one (in both senses of the world) and how the thru line for the generations is this idea of not being able to 1. disclose the truth out of a sense of protection (see: frank hiding his marital and monetary issues, darryl hiding his martial issues and fear of not surviving faerun, and grant hiding who he is and what he does) and 2. love away the pain/illness.

and now we turn to the oak boys. I’m operating on the assumption that henry will be the last dad that they seek out because 1. glenn and terry jr. are in the same spot which means we get a two for one combo deal in hell 2. lark and sparrow clearly have a bad or at the very least strained relationship with their dad and will be less likely to jump on seeking him out and 3. the oak family started the whole doodler thing in this show so it makes sense that they’ll end it.

and for the sake of transparency: here’s where my bias comes through. henry was my favorite season one dad. normal is my favorite season two kid. will campos if you���re reading this, I want you to know that if I could simultaneously give you an academy award and sue you for emotional damages, I would.

the oaks have the most literal device explaining their generational trauma. hildy was ripped from her world after her companions were brutally killed in front of her, barry is a piece of shit, henry has the weight of both his father and having to be a father despite not having a role model, lark and sparrow are fucked up beyond belief in a manner of ways that starts at fucking their twin’s spouse and ends with starting the literal apocalypse. and then there’s normal. bearing the brunt of it all when he wasn’t even given the support to. he’s been carrying the weight of expectation since birth. his sister is hero, he’s normal and yet he’s anything but. that’s a whole other essay (catch me writing that when it’s not 2am).

back to the twins and henry though. from their view it’s bad right? lark hates his dad and destroyed the world. sparrow was an accomplice. I can’t imagine that things were easy after the doodler was released in the oak-garcia household. ESPECIALLY — and this has had me uncomfortable since we learned it offhand in episode 29 of the season — because henry and mercedes had another kid. first things first (and this might just be a me and my cultural background thing), but a minimum decade age gap between your first and second kids is A Lot. especially given the context here that henry struggles with being a father for the aforementioned reasons and his children literally Ended The World. I dunno about you but I think that I’d avoid having more kids at pretty much all costs at that point. but he and mercedes don’t. and hey maybe birdie/birdy was an accident. but my suspicion here (and I very much might be reading too deep into something mentioned in a literal “see you again” parody) is that birdie was a second chance kid. which would fucking blow if you were the aforementioned dad-stabbing—eldritch-creature-releasing child because it would look like your dad had gone “okay well that didn’t work out I can’t find a way to make these kids work so let’s try another one” which would justify the distance and dislike of henry from both of the boys.

I’m a very big fan of henry. he’s fucked up in the exact way I like my fictional men and also reminds me of guys from the city I grew up in which is both appalling and endearing. however, this is absolutely a move I could see him justifying to himself which morally makes me wanna walk into the sea and from a character/story standpoint makes me wanna jump up and down in glee. I really, truly am hoping that things pan out like that and we see a henry who loves his beautiful boys very deeply, but also gave up on them in exchange for a do-over.

I’m especially excited to see how he interacts with normal because my first instinct based on season one without my fucked up and evil birdie theory is that he’ll love normal and make him feel special and seen while my second post-birdiegate instinct is that he’s just not going to care anymore and therefore do fuck-all for normal. he has the energy of a man who eventually just stops trying because he can’t ever make everything better. will campos, if you deliver on that, I’ll figure out how to sneak the oak family into an academic paper.

finally (for now), I’m predicting that the familial reunions will reflect the how the anchors broke. glenn, ron, and darryl will be love while henry will be hate. I think there’s a lot of possibility there that I can break down when it’s not almost 3am. thanks for reading! lmk what you think, I really want to discuss this with folks and get your takes!!

[deadsnothere]

"I'm sleeping with your sister"

Synopsis - While alias and lockwood are on a date Alias's brother Quill Kipps find his sister and his enemy enjoying a "conversation and a cup of tea." (warning: it gets a bit spicy at the end no actual smut but hints at it!!)

Masterlist

Request - Nope but they are open, pls request stuff guys i'm begging!!!

Word count - 1.7k

Speak Ali! - PLEASE REQUEST!! I will not use y/n but i will use Alias, and you can request things like "george's sister" or "the best listener" Alias is just the base name i'll use 😭 SO PLEASE REQUEST <3

Alias didn't mind when Kipps was a dick.

Except for when he was a dick to Lockwood and Co. Alias joined Lockwood and Co a good while ago, Quill always thought it was a waste of her talent. Thought that instead of agency work she should’ve gone into making flare’s and engineering since she was so good with that field of work. He even got Fittis to offer her a job as a mechanic after a mission went wrong as an agent. But she declined and told him she already got another job and left it at that. Alias and Quill were never that close, They had almost exactly opposite personalities, Alias was kind and sweet, sarcastically caring and the biggest drama queen in residence of 35 Portland row, and loves Anthony lockwood. While Quill was- Well Quill and despises Anthony lockwood.

“Well..if it isn't Andrew.” I immediately felt my eyes roll. When I looked up there was my dear brother himself. Quill Kipps! He looked over to me smiling, Ethan, one of Quill's agents, who stood closest to me, doing the same. Quill was acting nicer now then when he first learned that I’d joined Lockwood and Co as an Agent/Mechanic, he wasn't exactly happy. I was rendezvousing with the ‘enemy’. Little does he know I'm doing much more than that.

Me and Anthony were just trying to enjoy a date- A simple date at a small cafe before we went out with Lucy and Norrie, Can't even get that in this family! “What do you want, Kipps? Can you not see I'm trying to enjoy a cup of tea and a conversation?” Lockwood looked pissed. I'm pretty sure he was more pissed about Ethan being here than anything. If it was just Quill I'm sure he would be a little less angry but he always said he hated the way Ethan looked at me.

And so did I honestly but mainly because it was creepy- Even now in the middle of a cafe he was staring at me through the corner of his eye, acting like we definitely could not tell what or who he was looking at. “I'm sure now that Quill got his tea he can leave us alone Anthony, don't worry.” I spoke calmly trying to keep the little peace there was.

Quill snapped his head over to look at me. I’m not even kidding, I think I actually heard a crack- “Anthony!? Since when did you call him Anthony, Alias?” I raised an eyebrow, faking a confused face and biting down on my tongue, to keep my nerves down. “Since, I joined the agency…Me and Anthony have become very close friends, I’ll have you know.” Anthony snorted out a laugh from across the table, looking out the window to the side. I kicked his shin lightly, giving him the best ‘I will kick you in the balls’ glare I could muster.

Quill looked over to him, aggravated. “You have something to say, Tony?” Lockwood looked back to Quill acting like he didn't just laugh at me calling us ‘friends’. “Hm? Oh no-” Anthony turned his head to me next, making eye contact. He tilted his head up slightly, his fingers played with his chapped lips. Gods that made me think of last night, my lipstick marks was all over his face, it was so cute he looked so done with me but continued to let me kiss all over his face nonetheless. I looked away from him this time trying to keep the redness in my face down. Gods, this man is infuriating. I just want to kiss him till he can’t breath-

“No I just think it's funny is all.” “What's so funny?” Ethan responded next, even surprising Quill. “That you're both so caught up in Alias’s business. She's more mature than the both of you combined and yet you cling to her like she needs to be protected from everything.” He looked away from me to the other two to the right of him, taking a sip of his earl gray.

What a fucking hypocrite. He acts like he doesn't do the same shit! ‘Oh Alias you can’t do that! It’ll explode’ Or ‘Oh Alias Let me test that very new flare design instead of you even though you're the one who made it’ and ‘I'll protect you darling, even though I have a broken arm and I've been stabbed 14 times in the ribs!’ Ok maybe that last one was a bit dramatic but sometimes I think he would…

“How dare you! I'm their older brother- I have full right to be worried over their safety at your shady agency, Lockwood.” “I've known them both my entire life, it's just being a gentleman!” Lockwood scoffed back at both of their words. Although he seemed more offended at the thought that I wouldn't be safe at Lockwood and Co.

“If there's one thing I'm sure of Kipps, is that Alias’s safety is prioritized at our agency. More than you can say after your last mission together.” After a mission as an agent at fitties went south, Quill became a lot more protective over me. It was bothersome the majority of the time but there were very rare moments it was useful. “Don't you dare bring that up! You have no right to say that about me- You don't even know what happened other than what was put on the papers and that's barely true.” Anthony nodded along with Quill, a knowing look on his face. “But Ali told me everything. What you did..what you didn't.”

Quill looked so pissed, but immediately tried to ignore the comment about me telling him everything from that night. “Ali?! You let him call you Ali! You hate that nickname, you’ve always hated that nickname-” Ant looked so proud of himself, Laughing dryly. Interrupting my own response. “She's let me do a lot more than that Kipps, A lot more.” Three head’s shot over to him. Me kicking him in the shin, harder than the first time to hopefully get a point across. Ethan looked less than happy, with his pitiful little stare. And Quill looked as if he wasn't sure what he was going to do first, torture or kill him.

“He started to call me by the nickname on his own! I just didn't stop him..” I put my hands up in defense. “He’s a stubborn man ok? and plus it's..kinda sweet.” I put my hands back down, taking a sip of my hot chocolate, avoiding eye contact from my poor brother. It didn't take much to know Lockwood was enjoying this, just the annoying smirk when I called him sweet, and when Quill’s face turned red from anger.

“Sweet? Him sweet! He's a prick! an arsehole- The biggest dick I've met since trevor.” Trevor was a mutual friend we had, let's just say it didn't end well. “She certainly thinks I do.” I choked on my hot chocolate about dying as I tried to regain my composure. Quill’s face went dead serious. “She what.” I have a feeling this is going to end as badly as trevor. “I’m sleeping with your sister Kipps. We’ve been dating for almost a year.” Ethan’s face dropped, jaw opened, while Quill just looked at me, his eyes almost pleading for it not to be true. “Surprise?” I said in an uncertain tone, slowly moving my hands up to do jazz hands. Yeah just keep doing Jazz hands they make everything better-

It's not completely unprompted that we tell my brother, I mean we've had conversations about it in the past, we just never really got to it! “Alias Kipps when I told you don't rendezvous with the enemy I meant it!” I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose. “He's your enemy not mine!-” Quill looked almost offended. “You used to hate him too!” “Well He's obviously far from my enemy now!” “We bonded over hating him!” “Well now we can bond over making out with him!”

Lockwood was watching this conversation like a tennis game. A smirk on his face the entire time, until my head snapped to him. “And you, don't think you're free, and don't think I don't know of your little jealousy game. I have half a mind to kick your ass right now.” Quill’s face now held a smirk. I was looking back and forth between the boys, about ready to murder, and it showed on my face. “Now Quill, Ethan please walk away and if you’ll excuse me and my boyfriend. We are going to continue our date. bye bye” If it weren't for the fact that I looked ready to kill, they probably wouldn't have left, but after being my sibling for so long I think Quill learned what I could and couldn't do. They both reluctantly walked away keeping his stare on me and Anthony until he was out of the cafe.

I'm not sure which feeling was stronger, lust or anger. but i'm pretty sure it's both. I mean what an ass! Who does anthony think he is! He didn't even ask if it was ok to tell him. God he made my blood boil, but by the way he was sitting there with his legs man spread looking so proud of himself gods, I just want to absolutely ruin his perfect face. Force him to whine and whimper for my touch. Gods he'd look so perfect...

This was going to be a long date.

“Anthony.” I took in a deep breath trying to relax my head, at this point I couldn't tell what was anger and what was lust. He smiled at me with his ‘please forgive me’ smile. “Yes darling?” I stood up and took two steps to stand beside him, whispering in his ear. “When we get home, I expect to find you on your bed ready for me, got it?” I put my hand on his thigh and set my other hand on his shoulder. He nodded as a yes but that isn't exactly what I was expecting, he knows exactly what I'm expecting. The hand on his thigh trailed up just a bit higher, “Excuse me?” “Yes ma'am.” I nodded in satisfaction, patting his shoulder and moving both of my hands away. Picking up my to-go cup of hot chocolate, which was still hot, thank gods.

“Come on, Ant! We have places to be don't we? Promised Lucy and Norrie that double date.” I kissed his cheek and patted the other with my hand. “But I'll uh- give you a minute, I'll be outside getting a cab.” Even as I was walking away I could feel him staring at me. This time his stare was almost pleading for me to come back, desperate for attention.

part 2?

[pichipeachy]

Had some random thoughts in the shower about the Bridgerton couples lmao. What if they were placed in K-drama tropes?

Anthony would be the brooding CEO chaebol type who'd meet his match in spirited self-made entrepreneur Kate. Sparks and tensions fly as they compete, one-upping each other in terms of business. One night they get stranded together as a storm raged around them. They come to a truce and end up talking about their lives and dreams, falling in each other's arms as the night progresses. They fall in love and get married in the end, merging their companies. A power couple drama with a slow-burn romance.

Artsy Benedict keeps his chaebol status under wraps. He meets Sophie in art college and they have the classic "me and you against the world" romance; a rich guy falling for the poor girl despite everyone's judgments. They later learn Sophie is a long-lost heiress thrown out as a young child by her scheming stepmother to take her inheritance. Sophie gets what is rightfully hers and marries Benedict. A somewhat cheesy melodrama that we all love and need in our lives.

Colin and Penelope are childhood friends who lose contact when Penelope moves away due to her family getting embroiled in a scandal. They reunite in their adult years. They become friends once more, and romance blossoms between them. Things get complicated when Colin learns that Penelope is the brains behind an anonymous hacker his IT company had been hunting all this time. They manage to put everything behind them and collaborate as a dynamic duo instead. Cutesy romance at first but becomes angsty and glorious at the end.

Daphne is a celebrity who gets tainted with internet gossip. She goes into a contract relationship with Simon, an old money chaebol who swore to destroy the family legacy due to daddy issues. They fall in love, but Simon's self-made oath hurts their romance and results in one of the most scandalous celebrity breakups ever. They end up together, with Simon selling off the company and starting his own business. A drama that will make everyone swoon.

Eloise is a rebellious heiress who runs away from her responsibilities. She and Philip had a meet-cute in a foreign country but do not see each other again until years later. They end up living together in the same house due to a mix-up; Eloise signs an ironclad lease around the same time Philip inherits the house due to his brother's sudden demise. Add Philip's new wards (a cute nephew and niece) to the mix. A fun romcom with just the right dash of drama.

Francesca is a good girl from a rich family who accepts her duty and arranged marriage with John, who she has known all her life as a friend. Unfortunately, John dies before they get married, and the arrangement passes on to the next heir, Michael, who she met in their younger years but does not know much about. Michael, on the other hand, fell in love with Francesca at first sight but is disheartened by the arrangement made by their families. He stays away, only to be pulled back into the same arrangement he resented when his cousin died. This could be a sizzling period drama, with lots of pining and angst.

Gregory falls in love at first sight with Hermione and enlists the help of her friend Lucy. Over time his affection turns to Lucy instead, but Lucy is arranged to marry a chaebol who helped her family's ailing company from crashing to the ground. Gregory interrupts the wedding at the last second, revealing that the chaebol's family intends to create a hostile company takeover through marriage to Lucy. He saves the girl and they live happily ever after. This one has rom-com vibes all over, with a splash of action at the end.

Hyacinth is a law student who dreams of becoming a prosecutor. Gareth, her frenemy in law school, is the only remaining son of one of the richest men in the country. His father stripped him of his inheritance due to unknown reasons. They collaborate to find the truth, falling in love with each other during their investigation. They learn the truth of his paternity. Gareth is his uncle's illegitimate son, who left all of his riches in trust for Gareth. His father took over that trust to fund his failing company. Hyacinth files a case for Gareth, and wins. Legal romcom drama? Sign me up.

[sirkusdyretbooks]

Finally finished the second Bridgerton book "The Viscount who loved me".

This won't be as long as previously, (I didn't lie but I had more than I thought to write about it) but I want to talk about what I liked with this book, especially comparing it to season 2 of the Netflix show.

First of all, justice for Kate's leg-biting and childhood trauma which was voided out of the tv-show.

Summary:

Viscount Anthony Bridgerton has decided to marry, but only for practical reasons, to have heirs and a Viscountess. Absolutely not for love, that's the last thing trauma-riddled Anthony wanted for himself. But was it what he needed? He finds a lovely new girl out for the season, Edwina Sheffield who seem to be the perfect choice, if only there wasn't for Edwinas unlovable elder spinster sister, Kate.

Kate has joined her sister out for the season after her family spent all their money to travel to society for the girls to find husbands, well Edwina to find a husband, according to Kate. Kate does not look for a husband of society, and nobody looks at Kate as even an option. Edwina sparked too bright next to her, and Kate do not mind. An issue flares up as the most infamous Rake (trademark) of the ton sets his eyes upon Edwina, Anthony Bridgerton will absolutely not marry Edwina if Kate has something to say about it.

-

Anthony and Kate starts a rivalry, with Kate stepping on Anthonys toes while dancing. Anthony coming with snide remarks or just hanging out with Edwina to Kate's dismay.

There are certain scenes which are adapted, and I would like to mention some of them.

The first scene was not adapted to the show, and it's at the party at the Bridgertons country home: Aubrey Hall. This is where Anthonys relationship with Maria comes from and he has had the Opera singer follow him to his office. Where... Kate has gone to hide from Anthony, and other people. Kate listens to Anthony telling Maria he will keep mistresses when he marries, making Anthony even more of a villain than Kate already thought of him. In this scene, Kate ends up biting Anthony's leg. Which is just so absurd.

The second scene was adapted, and this one was much better in the show than the book, and that is the game of Pall Mall. In the book, only Kate, Edwina, Anthony, Colin, Daphne and Simon plays. In comparison with the Netflix show where we're missing Simon (of course), but have Daphne, Eloise, Anthony, Colin and Benedict together with the Sharma sisters Kate and Edwina which makes it a much better "look into the family of the Bridgertons" which was quite fun. In the book there are some good parts that didn't fit into the show of course, and some of them are the part where they have lost the Red ball in the lake, and thus cannot play with the Red set, leaving after everyone has picked colors, the Pink and the Purple. Anthony is away picking up Edwina (whom the group has decided gets the blue one). Colin, the absolute instigator of too many events in "The Viscount who loved me" throws the purple set into the shed, out of view, leaving Anthony with only the pink set to play with. Kate also ends the game by shooting the pink ball (of Anthonys) into the lake, and becomes the "winner" by Bridgerton rules.

The third scene is the bee-scene, which has Anthony going absolute out of line trying to "suck the poison" out as he's sure Kate will die. His mother, her step-mother and Mrs.Featherington sees them. They now have to marry. I liked this much better than the extra lengthy drama in the series. It is easy to feel like Kate betrayed Edwina in the series, which is absolutely dreadful, in which she does not in the book. Instead the book focuses on Anthony and Kate having a "loveless" marriage until it's not, Kate's fear of thunder and childhood trauma, and Anthony's own trauma and knowledge of mortality.

Even Kate's injury is less dramatic, with only being a broken leg.

The ending kind of rushes after this, and we get a epilogue which shows the result of what they worked with in the end of their book, with the viscount and viscountess absolutely giving no shits and loving each other.

So, yes this has been my comments about The Viscount who loved me.

[thepaintedlady00]

Nightshade

Chapter 21 | Chapter 23

TW: idiot fluff, I'm DRAAAAGGGGIIINNNGGGG this slowburn out til it kills us all, some heavy topics of abusers, past violence and assault, feelings of general anxiousness, as always language, mentions of drugs and drinking, a bit of Olive drama, teasing, conversations of past murder, Mav is just a whole TW in and of itself sometimes (but I love her), heavy topics, a fluffy kissing session or two, general fluff, having to work on Thanksgiving, Jennifer drama, some good ol found family content and a totally not foreboding end 🤭 Happy (late) Thanksgiving everyone! I hope y'all had an amazing day and some good food! Love y'all!

Chapter 22: Lemon Meringue

"Come out and face me, coward."

The words echoed in Anthony's mind like a discordant symphony. Howard had given the message to him all while whining and babbling like a child about the violence he'd endured. At first, Anthony had laughed. Leave it to the old drug dealer to rely on some spineless, worthless little puppet to deliver a threat. But, the longer he sat with it the more annoyed he got.

Coward. That word in particular left a foul taste in his mouth. Anthony Grosvenor was many things, but a coward? No. Absolutely not. 

He'd destroyed the crystal glassware on his table, leaving glittering chunks of it scattered along his floor. With a frustrated curse in French, he slicked his hair back and straightened his tie. Stepping over the mess Tony snapped his fingers and Jules followed. "Tell the maids to clean well today. I don't want a shard left on this floor."

"Of course, Sir."

"Now, remind me of our schedule." The two moved to the kitchen, where he gathered a new glass and bottle. "Nothing for this month, Sir. But, next, we have the party and-"

He waved his hand and poured himself a glass of the fine red. "Call Howard. Tell him to hang the thing in that horrid restaurant. And cancel the party."

Jules gave him a confused look. "Are you sure? You were very clear that you-"

"I know what I wanted, but that was then. And after this… poor attempt at a threat, it's obvious we'll need to be rid of that mutt before I can do what's necessary."

"Of course, Sir. We'll do whatever you require of us."

"Good," Tony sneered, examining the wine in his glass. Jules turned to carry out his orders no doubt. "And Jules," Tony added, causing the large man to turn, revealing his scarred, half-missing ear. "I want the dog gone. For good this time."

Jules smiled, "Understood, Sir."

Tony watched the red liquid swirl in his glass, reminiscent of the coming holiday. A holiday that should have been spent with Lena at his side behaving like he'd taught her to. Instead, she'd be at that diner with those people, her so-called family. 

He knew the truth of it though. He was her family. He was her everything. Lena could run and fight him for as long as she wanted, but that simple fact would never change. Anthony owned her, mind, body, and soul. She was branded by him, his adoration as well as his cruelty, and he was the only one who knew her for the monster she was. After all, he'd made her that way.

Lena would come home. Whether she came of her own volition or came dragged back by the hair she'd be at his side again. One way or another she always came back to him.

*

There was something so simple about moments of peaceful bliss. A simplicity that I knew was ever fleeting. It was a thing to be cherished, felt fully without reservation. So as the Irish folk music blared through the walls of my family's apartment I just smiled and buried my head in the crook of Jake's neck.

It had been a while since I'd woken up beside someone - or rather, a while since I'd gotten used to waking up with a particular someone. Waking up with Jake's arms around me was one of those precious moments I felt at peace. I clung to his warmth, content to lay there for the rest of the day, a feeling he seemed to share as he sleepily mumbled and pulled me closer into him.

My fingers idly traced the mermaid tail on his arm, drifting upwards to give the same attention to the words over his ribs. I smiled at the feeling of his breath shuddering beneath me, pursuing my lips to kiss the underside of his jaw. Outside my bedroom, my brothers clamored around, but I didn't mind their noise this morning, not when Jake was here.

He lifted a hand, catching the one that traced his tattoos and lacing our fingers together. "You're tickling me."

Humming softly I brushed my nose against his ear before tugging on it with my teeth. "Good morning."

"Mmmm," he groaned, turning and trapping me beneath him. Jake's lips sloppily pressed to my head, my cheeks, and my jaw before he finally cupped my face and pressed his lips to mine. The soft tired kiss left me feeling breathless as he lifted his head and smiled down at me. "Morning."

There was an odd and overwhelming feeling of intimacy and vulnerability that filled my chest with the burning longing to stay in this bed with Jake forever. Safe, tucked away in a tiny corner of the world where I knew nothing could hurt me. While I'd come to accept my deep feelings for the bartender, the thought of having to voice such things made my tongue feel like iron in my mouth. It should be easy, I told myself as I looked up into Jake's pretty eyes. Should be… But wasn't.

A pang of guilt and shame and white-hot anger made my lungs burn as I reminded myself why it wasn't easy. Why I was so afraid to just admit to the man sharing my bed that I liked him - adored him - and wanted to at least try to be something more? Tony had ruined such simplicity for me. He'd all but destroyed the very possibility of me having the courage to tell anyone in my life that I loved them, especially in a romantic sense. It'd fucked up a lot of things early on and had been a large factor as to why I only had casual flings and not full-fledged relationships. Sam was the first one who had gotten close to anything real. 

"Why can't you just love me back?"

"It's not that simple, Sammy."

"Yes, it is. You either love me or you don't, Lena."

"Then I guess I don't."

My jaw clenched as I shoved it all back inside the overflowing box inside. I smiled at Jake, caressed his face, and breathed in his smell. I'm here. I'm safe. "So," I started with an awkward laugh. "Seems like we've got a lot to talk about."

He flopped onto his side with a smile. "Yeah, the rainchecks are starting to build up."

"They are," I agreed softly.

Jake looked at me for a minute, those eyes taking in my face with a tired sparkle of wonder and something more. He smiled, moving to sit up and stretch. "Come on, I owe you some shitty eggs."

I followed his lead, quietly tossing his pants to him, happy that he didn't seem interested in pushing what was left unsaid between us until we both popped. In the living room, my brothers tied their shoes and quietly talked amongst themselves before they smirked up at us. "Mornin."

"Hey," I greeted, rubbing the rest of the sleep from my eyes. "We were just about to make breakfast."

Patrick kissed my head as Peter finished tying his shoes. "No breakfast today."

"What?"

"We're taking the boy on a jog," he replied, slapping Jake on the shoulder.

The still-tired bartender made a face. "The fuck did I do to deserve that?"

My brothers howled with laughter. Peter stood up and kissed my cheek. "You stuck around, of course!"

Patrick ruffled Jake's messy hair. "Hurry downstairs and get changed, little brother. We're taking the scenic route today!"

Biting back a laugh I smugly grinned at him. "That means they're taking you the long way."

"Shut up," he huffed. "Horrible. All of you."

"Have fun!" I yelled after them, earning a middle finger from them all as they closed the door behind them.

Isaac emerged from Peter's room with a shy smile. He gestured toward the door. “Quinn and I are getting breakfast. You wanna come?”

"Sure curly," I replied, ruffling his hair.

I dressed in warm, casual clothes and linked arms with my brother's boyfriend as we walked along the busy sidewalk towards the only other diner in town Quinn would eat at. Isaac was thankfully back to his bright, cheery self. I'd missed his laughter and his exaggerated stories. Though his face still held the faint marks his monster left his heart hadn't been marred. Isaac remained the man he always was, kind and thoughtful and funny and I was grateful for it.

Lifting a finger to his cheek I prodded one of the faint marks. “Your face looks better than it did a few weeks ago.”

He sweetly smiled, scratched his head, and shrugged. “Guess I get to keep my status as prettiest cook at 22West.”

“Guess so,” I laughed. “Careful though, Santos is awfully pretty. I'd hate for you to lose your title.”

The two of us continued to tease each other as we sat down in the old booth and looked at the menus. Isaac looked around with furrowed brows. “Quinn must be running late.”

I hummed, following his lead and looking around the diner. “Maybe she overslept.”

Isaac nodded, but a look of uncertainty remained in his eyes. “Maybe.”

“Hey, she’s alright.”

“Yeah,” he agreed, staring down at the table.

“How are you doing?” I asked, reaching over to take hold of his hand. “It’s been a minute since I asked.”

With that blinding smile of his, Isaac replied, “I’m doing good. Better than I have been in a while, but there’s still those days ya know?”

“I know.”

Squeezing my hand he drew in a deep breath. “Thank you, for everything you’ve done for me, Lena.”

“That’s what friends are for.” I smiled. “Besides, what kind of sister would I be if I let my brother's boyfriend suffer?”

The diner bell chimed as Quinn hurried through and wordlessly found our table. As she sat down, shedding her jacket and throwing it into the booth beside me I could see the tenseness in her shoulders and the set look on her face that she always got when some shit went down. “Sorry, I’m late.”

Isaac waved her off. “No worries. We ordered your usual for you.”

“Thanks.”

Conversation flowed as usual between Isaac and me, but Quinn seemed far away only joining us in speaking when we addressed her. When the curly-haired man excused himself to the bathroom I nudged her shoulder. “You okay?”

She blinked a few times, clearly being pulled from whatever thoughts were on her mind. “Yeah, I’m good.”

“Quinn.”

“I’m fine,” she replied. “It’s just… been a long morning.”

“Did something happen with you and Ari?”

Shaking her head she scoffed. “Course not. We’re solid.”

I tilted my head and forced her to hold my eyes. “Spill it, Q.”

“Lee, it’s seriously nothing.” She took a drink. “I’m a big girl, I’ve got it under control.”

“Fine,” I relented as the server came with our food. “Just remember if you need anything we’re here for you.”

“I know.”

*

Exercise wasn't anything new to Jake, especially not after the months of training with Patrick, but this was just torture. They jogged through the city streets for what felt like hours. Block after block the Harrow brothers just kept jogging. They made small talk here and there, but mostly just laughed at his struggle to keep the pace they'd set. So, when Nana's diner came into view Jake almost cried.

The three of them hurried through the door. Patrick patted Jake's back as he bent over gasping for air. "Don't pass out on us now, little brother."

"You two are sadists," he heaved in reply.

Peter waved down Nana as she emerged from behind the counter. "Can we get some water, Nana?"

She laughed and hurried off to get it for them as they moved through the diner toward the back booth. Jake's fatigue and slightly poor attitude faded at the sight of Dom already waiting. Seemed like the conversation that was promised wasn't gonna wait.

They sat in silence, everything fading until all that remained was the topic none of them wanted to bring up. Dom spoke first, "How is she this morning?"

"She seems alright," Peter answered. 

"So, you decided not to tell her?" Dom continued.

Jake swallowed a lump in his throat and nodded. "I don't want to lie to her but this… She should be the one to choose when she wants to talk about it."

The drug dealer nodded in approval. "Smart boy." He set his hands on the table with a sigh. "You have questions though."

"Don't we all?" Patrick sneered.

Peter jabbed him. "Don't start this again Pat."

"I just don't see why Dom's so keen on keeping us in the dark."

Jake turned to look at them, confused as to what they meant. "I made her a promise. One I ain't gonna break just cause you want me to."

Patrick sat back, the four of them going quiet as Nana approached. "Oh, my strong boys!" She pinched his cheek and smiled at everyone. "It is early today, I hope you're here because you are hungry."

"We're starving," Peter assured her.

"Good!" She clapped. "I make all your favorites!"

They watched her leave and when she disappeared Dom settled back and gestured to Jake. "Alright, tough guy, ask me."

Ask me. It sounded so simple, but this… It wasn't simple. Every question he had hung on the tip of his tongue. Who is he? How long did she have to go through that? How old was she? So many questions… But the one that came out first was this: "Why didn't you help her?"

Dom's jaw clenched and for a minute Jake thought he'd just fucked everything up. He expected Dom to hit him, to reach out and grab him, but he didn't. Dom just held his gaze and answered, "I didn't know how bad it was. Not til she told me. I…" He sighed, turning to look out the window for a moment. "I should have known. I should have done something sooner and that's something I'll have to live with."

Patrick bumped his shoulder as if to shake him from the startled punch-ready state. "Relax, little brother. We all asked that question first."

"Dom's heard it a lot by now," Peter added.

"Who knows?"

That seemed to make Patrick a bit angry. "You'll have to be more specific." His eyes drifted to Dom. "The question you ought to ask is who knows what?"

"Isaac and Prue know the least." Dom held Pat's glare. "They know the name and a very very vague summary of what went down. Peter, Patrick, and Oz know a bit more than that. Names, locations, durations, and a few other things she chose to share. Nana and Quinn know just a bit more than them, not a lot but enough."

Jake somehow felt more confused. How could they all know such varying degrees of the same information? "And you?"

Patrick scoffed. "Dom knows all of it. Every name, location, duration, and god damn detail."

Dom's eyes filled with guilt for a moment, but it faded quickly. "I know what she told me."

"And she just happened to tell you all of it."

"Patrick," Peter warned. "We're all on the same side here."

"Same side my ass." He shook his head. "I deserve to know what that motherfucker did to my sister so I can pay it forward whenever he slinks back to town."

Peter just sighed, looking tired. "Not even Dad knew all of it, Pat. She obviously doesn't want us to know."

Jake stared at his now half-empty glass of water, only half listening to the others as they quietly argued for a moment. He wanted to know everything and at the same time, he wanted to know nothing at all. "What's his name?"

Dom's head tilted slightly, a look of pride… Respect calming his features. "Anthony. But the fucker likes to be called Tony."

Anthony. He repeated the name about fifty times before his mouth opened again. "How long?"

"Three years."

Three years. In any other circumstance, he'd consider it a short amount of time. Three years of torture though… That was different, longer. "And were those three years filled with… That?"

Dom looked down. "That and worse."

Worse? Jake almost scoffed. What could possibly be worse than that? He would have asked, but the look in the eyes of Lena's brothers and Dom told him he probably didn't want to know… And that they likely wouldn't have told him even if he did. Anger replaced his curiosity. "Where is he now?"

"Around."

Patrick slammed his hand onto the table. "Dom I swear to god–"

"I'm taking care of it."

"That's what you always say," he argued. "And yet every time he comes back. So, enlighten us, how the fuck are you handling this?"

Peter, the logical and cool-headed older brother, seemed just as angry now. "I don't want a repeat of what happened after Dad died, Dom."

The drug dealer nodded, guilt once again making his lips cast downward. "It won't come to that."

"How do you know?" Peter wasn't giving up.

"That was different. He had leverage-"

"He always has leverage," Peter argued.

Patrick shook his head. "What I'm hearing is you don't have a goddamn clue what you're doing."

Dom's glare was deadly as he pointed to Patrick. "You don't know what you're talking about."

Jake decided to speak up and hopefully avoid a fight breaking out between the two. "Does he pop up often?"

"No," Peter answered while the other two continued their stare-down. "He left her alone for a few years after she got out for good. But, once our dad died he started showing up, causing trouble, and trying to get her to go back with him."

"That's underselling it a bit," Patrick scoffed. "Son of a bitch tries kidnapping her, threatening everyone she cares about, making her relapse. Fucker shot me the last time he came round."

Jake raised his brows in disbelief, staring at the redhead as he touched his arm. Peter rolled his eyes. "The bullet barely touched you."

"Still fuckin' stung."

Dom shook his head and continued. "I'm handling it. You morons just need to keep her out of it. Keep her happy."

Peter chuckled a bit. "Pretty tall order."

Patrick joined in. "She's a tough one to keep happy."

"Seems pretty easy to me," Jake said with a smug grin.

"Disgusting!" Peter hollered, glancing his way with a pointed look. "That's my sister."

Nana set the plates down in front of them with a smile. "It is so good to see my boys laughing together!" She stroked his hair lovingly and did the same to Dom's shoulder. "Let me know if you need anything else."

As Jake sat with the Harrow boys and the drug dealer inhaling their food, he felt a weight lift off his chest. Whatever guilt he felt slowly eased with the knowledge that he wasn't alone in this messy situation. He had the others to help keep him on the right track with Lena.

Maybe, just maybe he had a chance at doing whatever this was right. Maybe this time he wouldn't fuck it up.

*

Simone walked with her head high, taking in the lovely color of the leaves and enjoying the chilled breeze as she moved through the crowds of people. She wasn't a fan of the cold, but some days it had a usefulness in distracting her. No amount of cold, however, could distract her from the fast-approaching holiday.

Thanksgiving, a time of family and joy and food and laughter. A time to keep up appearances and keep people in line so as not to overstep or overreach. Simone hated Thanksgiving, as she did most holidays because it forced her to sit at a table with her parents and pretend there wasn't unspoken animosity between them. 

Her father was a drunk, not a violent one, but an absent one. He used holidays to fuel his addiction and spout off whatever nonsense his mind was filled with that particular holiday. It ruined the mood for everyone quickly. Her mother was timid and unimaginative. She married the first man that offered her the security she sought. She took no risks, had no adventures, and was - at least in Simone's mind - useless outside the role of wife. Her mother had settled and in turn, she'd inadvertently ruined Simone's one chance at happiness with Etienne.

In just a few days she'd pack a bag and drive to Cape Cod to endure the family dinner. It wouldn't be too bad, she reminded herself. Jake will certainly take some of the edge off. He was always in such a sour mood about going back home. Childishly he'd whine about not wanting to go - a few times he'd even tell her he wasn't going - but he'd always be there in the morning with his bags.

It was annoying in the way most repetitive things were, but if Simone was truly honest she enjoyed the back and forth. She enjoyed watching Jake fight and struggle against it only to give in to her. The sex was another plus. She'd sneak into his room once her parents had gone to bed and they'd share in a night of passion where his loyalty and love were confirmed as hers and hers alone. It reminded her of when they were younger, of the first times she'd gone to his room.

As she neared Jake's apartment she was bitterly reminded of their last trip to the Cape and how unfulfilled she was left. It still filled her with rage when she remembered the sight of that red-haired felon sitting across from Jake in that diner or when she'd had the nerve to share a cigarette with him and give her that look through the window. Hopefully, she didn't have to worry about that this time.

It wasn't hard to rattle the girl given her obvious insecurities where intimate relationships were involved. Implying her little get-together with Jake was more than just a simple meeting between friends had sent her into an obvious spiral of anxiety. She smiled to herself at the memory of her pretty little face losing its smile and adopting a wide-eyed look of terror. Simone had just been lucky enough to hear about their plans through a well-timed trip to the locker room. Ari's new fling was too loud for her own good when she'd called to spread the gossip of Jake and Lena's plans to her lover.

Simone opened Jake's apartment door without knocking, not caring if she caught him in the throws of passion with some girl or not. She didn't expect to find his apartment empty. Jake was a boy of habit. He slept in till noon and left his apartment a mess, yet his bed was neatly made and his place was tidy. She hummed curiously as she leafed through his mail and moved through his space in search of anything out of place.

A hiss drew her eyes to the floor where a hideous cat peeked out from behind his counter. "Why hello there," she cooed to the cat. "What are you doing here?"

The black, hairless thing lifted its body and hissed. Simone chuckled, Seems he finally found something as grumpy as him. She bent down and reached out toward it, earning a quick scratch to the back of her hand and another louder hiss before the creature scurried beneath Jake's bed. Its eyes glowed in the darkness as it watched her with discontent.

She examined the small cut with a scoff. "Unruly thing."

Simone picked Jake's discarded clothes up off the floor, taking them into the bathroom to place them in his hamper. A shirt sat on his counter, neatly folded beside a shopping bag. The lingerie inside made her frown with disappointment. Of course, he's wasting his money on little gifts for her. She huffed, looking at his shelves and tapping her fingers on his camera as she held it in her hands and turned it on to leaf through whatever little sights Jake had deemed important enough to dust off his useless little camera.

Her frown grew, and the sliver of assured importance in the bartender's life turned to a fire of bitter anger. Simone swallowed it, grabbed the shirt, and left the apartment, storing that anger hoping it'd prove useful to her - more useful than it had the last time.

*

Jake moved, weaving and dodging, stepping and striking like all of it was second nature - something he'd been doing his whole life. As I watched from the front counter I couldn't help but admire the beauty of him. His toned muscles glistened with sweat, flexing and relaxing in intervals. His messy hair was haphazardly slicked back but those stubborn strands still fell beautifully out of place around his face. The focus in his eyes, the pure confidence and determination they held… It was mesmerizing.

It felt like he'd been dancing in the ring with Zeke for hours, but realistically it'd only taken him four hits to win the practice match. Once Patrick declared the win Jake's demeanor relaxed and he quickly checked up on Zeke, who complimented his powerful strikes. Patrick stood next to him, giving him praise and pointers, but Jake's eyes drifted to me. That smirk and a wink was all it took to turn me into a blushing mess, one Peter saw.

My brother wiggled his eyebrows. "Not a word or I'll start talking about you and your boyfriend."

He held his hands up. "I was just gonna say you look good today."

"Sure you were." Glancing at the clock I turned toward the ring. "Hey, Tough Guy! Hit the showers or we're gonna be late!"

Rolling his eyes he caught the water bottle Pat tossed him and headed towards the locker room. Patrick hopped down and stood on the opposite side of the front counter, sipping his own water. He and Peter shared a look. "So…"

Pat swallowed. "You and the boy… What's going on there?"

"What do you mean?"

"Are you two official yet?" Peter clarified.

The nervous tension swelled in my gut again as I shrugged them off and moved to head up the stairs and get ready myself. "Gonna just ignore us?"

"Yep!" I answered.

In the quiet safety of my bedroom, I didn't let myself sit with the question. Nor did I let the answer sink in. Jake was Jake. I was me. That was it, that was all. Unpacking how badly I wanted it to be me and Jake or Jake and I… Well, that would just ruin it. I didn't want to lose what we'd spent all this time building. I didn't want to fuck it up.

Downstairs Jake was waiting for me by the door, dressed in his casual clothes and ready for the walk to work. We both ignored my brothers as they gushed over us and we walked together as if nothing had changed. But, we both felt it. We both knew the truth.

Everything had changed.

*

The second Jake walked through the kitchen door he was met with pure chaos. The kitchen was in disorderly work while the servers were sprinting around. Beside him, Lena whistled. "What the fuck?"

Scott's head shot up. "Finally! Get changed, we need all hands on deck, Red!"

"What's going on?"

"Howard's gone," Scott replied. "Just texted Will and I that he's taking some time off."

Jake hid his smirk, trying to picture just how fucked Howard's face looked after the beating he took. Serves him right. Lena sighed and scratched her head. "Fuck. Okay. I'll be right down."

“Sounds like tonight's gonna be great,” he said with a grin. Lena shot him a glance, a small smirk on her lips. “No Howard up everyone's ass.”

“And a dining room full of whiny guests and no manager. What could possibly go wrong?”

He shrugged off his jacket as they neared the top of the steps. “I thought you'd have more faith in Will's managerial skills.”

As if on cue the suited man bolted from the locker room, face tight with anxiety as he practically threw himself down the steps with a rushed, “Excuse me!”

Lena watched him go and sighed again. “Yep, we're fucked.”

Nudging her shoulder Jake kept walking. “Have some faith. He'll figure it out.”

“Never thought I'd hear you of all people chime in for Will.”

“Shut up.”

Their soft laughter died the second they walked through the locker room door. Simone stood, buttoning up her shirt and staring at them with hardened eyes and a stiff smile. Jake knew that look, that judgmental way she regarded him, and given what she'd said to Lena they were overdue for another one of those conversations he hated so much. Lena spoke first, “Good morning.”

Simone chuckled. “Good is hardly the word I'd use to describe the start of this day.”

“Howards gone,” Jake said. “I'd call that a pretty good start.”

She ignored his comment entirely and smoothed her fingers over the bandage on her hand. “I stopped by your apartment and met that unruly creature you've taken in.”

Quietly cursing himself Jake nodded, opening the locker and putting his jacket inside. “It takes him a little time to warm up to people.”

“It scratched me,” Simone said harshly. “Leave it for you to find an animal with just as sour a mood as you.” Checking her lipstick in the mirror she continued. “I won't be taking care of it when you get bored.”

“I don't expect you to take care of him,” Jake answered, rolling his eyes. “We both know you hate animals.”

Lena closed her locker door and quickly buttoned her cooking coat, clearly in a hurry to vacate the tense atmosphere that hovered around him and Simone. Turning to leave she stopped at the sound of Someone's voice, “Lena.” Simone reached into her locker and grabbed a neatly folded shirt from one of the shelves. With a step forward she smiled and held it out to her. “I believe this is yours. I took the liberty of washing it for you.”

God dammit. He resisted the urge to throw his head back into his locker as he watched Lena offer up a clearly strained smile as she took the shirt. “Thanks.” She handed it to him. “Put that in your locker for me?”

“Sure,” he answered.

“See you after service,” she said with a tiny hint of a real smile - a reassurance that Simone's overstepping gesture hadn't deterred her from whatever this was.

The quiet that settled after her steps faded from the stairwell was short-lived as Simone turned to him, smug and rageful all at once. “Well, how was she?”

Wincing he turned to her, holding up the shirt. “Why are you going through my things?”

"I was just tidying up," she replied with a soft laugh. "We both know what a slob you can be." Her eyes drifted to his locker as he placed Lena's shirt on a shelf. “The shirt was on your counter. I assumed it was hers and figured she'd want it back instead of it going to your trophy box.”

Jake had been angry with Simone many times over the years. The two of them had many ups and downs, but once the dust settled they always found a way to get through whatever it was creating a rift between them. His anger wasn't new, but the tiny sliver of restlessness was. Jake had been angry with Simone before, but never had he felt even a hint of wanting their strange dance to end. Until now.

With a sigh, Jake closed his locker and looked at her. “What did you say to Lena?”

“What-”

“You know what I'm talking about,” he cut off with a firm voice.

Simones's lips pursed, displeased at his tone. “I was just making small talk, Jake. Trying to get along like you wanted.”

“You insinuated our plans were a date to try and freak her out.” Shaking his head he let his anger simmer. “Look, I know it's been hard for you with Lena, but that doesn't mean you can't just be civil. If that's not something you wanna do, fine, then just do what you normally do with girls I start seeing and stay out of it. It's none of your business anyway.”

Finally, the blonde woman laughed. “You are my business. Or have you forgotten all that we went through?”

Jake shook his head. “That’s not fair.”

“I expect you to be selfish and angry Jake, that's who you are. And never once have I asked you to change. Yet here you are, asking me to stop taking care of you as it’s not who I am!” She huffed out a breath and glared at him. “I have sacrificed time and time again for you. You…” Tears built in her eyes. “You're all I have.”

“Simone-”

She held up her hand and placed it on his chest. “I'm sorry if I've caused issues in your personal life, Jake. I am. But, I will never stop looking out for you.”

“I'm not asking you to, I just… Cut Lena some slack. She's not Tess.”

Reluctantly, Simone nodded. The tears in her eyes vanished as she smiled at him. “Alright. If it's that important to you, fine. But, you… You'll still tell me if anything changes between you two, right?”

Jake nodded, a hint of a smile tugging at his lips. “You know I will.”

“Good.” Simone turned, moving to join the chaos outside the locker room. "Oh," she suddenly said, pausing in the doorway. "I spoke to Howard about us taking Thanksgiving off to go home before this little disappearance of his."

Jake's smile fell and his jaw clenched painfully. "I don't-"

Simone sighed, biting back a bitter laugh. "You don't want to go. I know. Please, save me the speech."

“I’m not-”

"You're coming," she interrupted. As always in her mind this was not some request that he could just say no to, not some event he could skip. This was a command, the command that she always gave him and that he always followed. Her eyes softened again. "Please, no more fighting. I need you."

He turned away from her to the mirror to mess with his tie. "Fine, whatever."

"I'll text you later to remind you to pack."

*

The kitchen was a mad dash of bodies in the throws of preparation. The sounds of unsynchronised knives chopping and four conversations being loudly spoken over each other filled my ears as I tried to help in any way I could. Isaac gave me a wide-eyed look as he lifted a finger to slice across his neck in an unspoken “we're fucked” motion. I rolled my eyes at him and turned to help Scott with the sauces.

“Leave it to Howard to fuck us right before the holiday.” Angrily shaking his head and throwing his tasting spoon on the washing bin Scott wiped the sweat from his brows. “Thanks-fucking-giving of all ones.”

“We've got this, Chef,” I assured him. “Preps almost done and we're fully stocked on all the shit we need.”

Nodding his eyes drifted to Will as he slammed through the door, paced for a moment, and then returned to the lobby. “It’s not the kitchen I'm worried about, Red.”

Patting his shoulder I moved around the tables. “I'll go talk to him.”

Scott chuckled or scoffed. “Good luck!”

Will stood next to the hostess station, flipping through the guestbook and mumbling reminders to himself. Jake watched with a very noticeable grin as he prepped the bar. Though outwardly he appeared happy, there was a tenseness in his posture that made me wonder what was really on his mind. The list of possible irritants had grown large over the past few weeks. Still, I chose to lean into the more mirthful side of him. I shot him a look, leaning over to snag his rag. “Be nice!”

“I'm smiling,” he replied with an even wider grin. “That not nice enough for you?”

“You're smiling at someone else's expense.”

Pursing his lips to hide the smile Jake nodded. “No smiling. Got it.”

I tucked the rag into my pocket and rolled my eyes. “Ass.”

“Move Mr and Mrs Wilson to table ten and then move Mr. Kepner and his colleagues to table six,” Will hastily instructed the new hostess who stood beside him practically shaking as she made the notes in the guestbook.

“Will,” I called out, causing him to whip around with the gaze of a madman.

“What’s the problem?”

I set a hand on his arm and offered up a calming smile. “No problem, I just wanted to check up on you.”

He sighed, running a hand down his face. “Sorry, I’m a mess. It’s just with Howard not here everything’s on me and I… I’m still technically in training. I’m not ready to run this place on my own!”

“Breathe,” I instructed. “You’ve got this, Will. Just treat it like any other night. Schmooze the guests, check in on everyone, and help the hostess if we get busy.”

“What if-”

“No, what if’s,” I insisted, straightening his tie. “You’ve got this.”

With a shaky breath, he nodded with me. “I’ve got this.”

I smiled, “Good. Now get to family meal and give us a good pep talk.”

“I can do that,” he whispered. “Yeah, okay, I can do that.”

The table was rowdy and filled with practically every server using the time to grill Will about the specifics of Howard’s sudden disappearance. Sasha filled his mouth with food and loudly proclaimed, “It’s probably syphilis.” 

Heather’s face scrunched up as she turned to Sasha. “Howard doesn’t have syphilis.”

“How do you know?” The Russian taunted.

Ari rolled her eyes. “He’s obviously ditching for the holiday.”

“Howard wouldn’t do that,” Heather defended again.

“He can’t hear you.”

“I know that.”

Sasha swallowed a gulp of wine and smirked. “He’s not going to fuck you either.”

Will finally cut through the noise with a loud clearing of his throat followed by a deep, commanding tone that made Sasha’s eyebrows shoot up. “It doesn’t matter why he’s gone. It changes nothing about our jobs. So, tonight goes like normal alright everyone?”

Sasha quickly saluted. “Aye, aye, Captain Will!”

“You should talk like this all the time,” Ari purred. “It makes you sound so sexy!”

It was going to be a long night.

*

Why am I still bothering with this place? Olivia asked herself as she stood next to the bar and watched the dining room full of people. At first, it’d been a request Jennifer Glover had made to check in on her estranged daughter and it’d been something Olivia had been more than happy to do for her employer. She would do anything for Jennifer. But, then she’d gotten here and actually met this “golden child”, Lena, and her motivations shifted.

It was no secret that Olivia had the desire to win the Glover seal of approval - to prove that she was so much more than just another employee. So, it came as little surprise to her when she’d found herself working closely with Simone to try and expose Lena for what she truly was. Ungrateful. Disrespectful. Unworthy of her mother's love. It started small, too small. She’d wasted so much of her time following Simone’s advice at seducing Jake - a tactic that proved less fruitful and more hurtful than she’d expected. A shove down the stairs and some red hair dye later, though, Olivia had moved on to a more effective tactic.

“Olive,” Jake said. “More whisky.”

She acted like she didn’t hear him, continuing to stand beside the bar and look as bored as she could until Nicky repeated the request. Ignoring them seemed to do more than any of her other attempts. It slowed down service and annoyed them so she considered it a win. As she made her way to the wine cellar she caught Simone’s stare. After the glass incident, they’d stopped speaking. Simone was of the mind that she’d gone too far and was being reckless, but in Olivia’s opinion, Simone lacked the conviction to do what had to be done to see results. That was why she’d been so unsuccessful at severing the bond Lena had crafted with the bartender. And it would be the reason she remained unsuccessful.

In just an hour and a half Olive had managed to drop every plate she touched and slow service down enough that Will finally cut her. As she changed her phone chimed. Wonderful work tonight, dear. You’ll have that rebellious girl of mine fired before the months up. 

That’s why, She told herself with a smile. Jennifer needed her help and so, Olivia would suffer the dull and tedious work. She’d sacrifice her nights and whatever public opinion the workers would form and she’d do it all with a smile. For Jennifer. And for Anthony.

*

“Holy fuck,” Scott sighed stretching out his neck. “That was fucking horrible.”

I watched Santos finish sweeping up the last of the shattered plates and ruined food. “Yeah, I don’t think I’ve ever had to refire seven entrees at once before.”

Scoffing he tossed a rag onto the table. “Stupid bitch was relentless tonight.”

“Well, at least it’s over now.”

“Til tomorrow.” The whole kitchen groaned. “Thanksgiving sucks ass.”

Isaac quickly chimed in, “No, no, no! Working on Thanksgiving sucks ass!”

Rags flew through the air as the whole kitchen booed him up the stairs. I followed the rowdy kitchen crew to the locker room and changed as the servers quickly joined us with equal complaints about their last tables. Jake followed soon after with Simone, the sliver of tenseness I’d noticed earlier now far more prominent not just in his posture but also in his face. Closing my locker, I chose to follow the majority of the cooks downstairs rather than wait for Simone to vacate his side. If he wanted to talk to me about it, he would later.

Nicky made my drink and slid it towards me, waiting until Jake returned from changing to go upstairs to change himself. Simone sat down by the edge of the bar, watching Jake pour her a glass of wine with a pleased smile and a quiet thanks. She sent me a chilled smile as she lifted the glass to her nose to inhale the scent. Whatever had Jake stressed had something to do with her, and that simple fact made my chest burn.

“Great service tonight you guys,” Will announced with a relieved smile.

Scott took a long drag of his cigarette. “Yeah, the seven refires was real fun.”

Will rolled his eyes. “Seriously guys, if we can just get through to tomorrow then we’ll be set until Howard gets back.”

Sasha raised his glass with a playful smirk. “Cheers to the ever-inspiring words of encouragement from our sweet Will! This will certainly be more than enough to get us through the coming hellish turkey day!”

"Speaking of the holiday," I started after the cheering and laughter had died down, "What are all of you guys doing?"

Heather blew out a puff of smoke. "I'm going to visit my family."

Scott nodded. "Same."

Nicky grinned, "I get to have dinner with the inlaws!" Oohs and ahhs echoed through the group. "Thrilling, I know."

"I am going to spend the night in my apartment, masturbating!" Sasha proclaimed with a wicked but sad grin.

Ari just rolled her eyes, but she eventually smiled. "I have a date with my crazy hot girlfriend."

"Nana's?" I asked.

"Yeah. Are you going too?"

I nodded, sliding my empty glass to Jake. "Oh, everyone is. It's Nana's favorite holiday. She loves getting the whole family together for dinner." 

Turning my head and opening my mouth to give Jake an official invite to my family's celebration, I wasn't able to make a sound before Simone cut in. "Jake and I are spending the holiday in Cape Cod with my family."

Anyone looking at Jake could see the sheer dread that followed the statement, but only I could see just how deep it went. His jaw clenched painfully tight, and the steady movements of his hands faltered. Those mischievous blue eyes filled with despair, anger, and fear in seconds. He didn't want to go. He really didn't want to fucking go. But he would because of Simone.

My anger burned hotter in my chest as I forced myself to smile and nod. "Well anyone that wants to come to Nana's is more than welcome to! She always has plenty of food."

The conversation progressed as it usually did, Sasha teased, Ari laughed, Heather flirted with the cook she was casually seeing and all seemed well. Simone set her glass on the bartop and put her coat on. “Goodnight everyone. Jake, try not to be late tomorrow and please pack this time.”

“Yeah, whatever,” he replied flippantly, not even turning to look at her.

She smiled again, disgustingly pleased at his defeated tone. Fucking bitch. As her dumb blonde head vanished out the door I shifted my focus back to the tight-faced bartender who avoided eye contact with everyone around him, me included. All my lingering thoughts and anxieties about the conversations we still needed to have and the things that had clearly changed between us faded away. Now all that mattered was finding a way to help him.

Scott slid his glass towards Jake. “We’re going for food, you in?”

“Sure,” he replied, turning to leave. “You guys go ahead. I’ve gotta grab my jacket.”

Ari rubbed my back. “Coming, Tiger?”

I stood up, following after Jake. “Yeah, I’ll meet you guys there.”

“Of course, they need a quick fuck to work up their appetites,” Sasha teased, effectively dodging Heather’s slap. “What? We’re all thinking it?”

Upstairs Jake stared into his locker, holding his jacket in a tight grip, his back heaving up and down. It’d been a long time since I’d seen him like this. How dare she put him through this. “So…” I carefully broached. “You're going to The Cape?”

Jake sighed, restless and angry as he shoved his arms into the sleeves. “Looks that way.”

“Fuck The Cape.” I set a hand on his arm, luring his eyes to mine. “Fuck all of it unless it's what you want.”

“Simone-”

Fuck her too, I almost said. “Isn't you. What do you want?”

His jaw clenched as he shook his head and stretched his neck in that nervous way he did. “I… I don't know.”

Tugging on his arm I nodded to the door. “Come on.”

“I’m not hungry,” Jake sighed, still following me anyway.

“We’re not going to eat.”

“Then where are we-”

“No more questions,” I replied, pulling him out into the cold. “Just trust me.”

We walked in silence most of the way to the theater, but the second Jake saw the lights and the movie posters he seemed to stop resisting so much. As I looked up at him the weight in his eyes and shoulders seemed to lax. “What are we seeing?”

I shrugged, “No clue.”

The only two tickets they had left were for another horror movie, which I’d quickly declined, and some new romantic comedy that didn’t sound like something either of us would particularly enjoy. Jake didn’t seem to care though, and I assumed it was something that really didn’t matter to him. A distraction was a distraction, and that’s all he wanted right now. So, I grabbed the popcorn, he grabbed the drinks and we both found seats in the surprisingly full theater. It wasn’t quite the same as last time. Jake’s tension proved to be more difficult to ease than mine had, but I reached over and took hold of his hand and he accepted the small gesture. Squeezing my hand in his as he watched the screen in front of us with mild interest, I knew he was grateful for my small attempt to take his mind off Simone and The Cape and Thanksgiving and everything his mind refused to let him forget. 

After the movie had ended, we lingered in the alley next to the theater, sharing a cigarette. Fuck The Cape, I wanted to remind him again. Fuck that place that made us so miserable, I wanted to scream at him. Stay. Instead of pressuring him even more to defy the will of Simone I simply asked, “Did that help at all?”

“Kinda,” he replied. “This is just… complicated.”

“I understand.” Leaning back against the wall beside him I sighed, “Do you know what you’re gonna do yet?”

He shook his head. “No.”

I set my head against his arm. “No one’s going to blame you for going home, Jake.”

"Home is the past," he said, voice soft. He was angry and bitter as he stared ahead at the alley wall opposite us, but this tone was something new. Something that sounded like the voice of a lost boy, one desperate to break away from all that had hurt him while also trying not to disappoint those he'd deemed important.

Lifting my head I touched his cheek, gently letting my fingers smooth over his skin. "Home might be the past, but you can't run from that. You can't go back and change how things were. Ignore it... Try to forget it… It's only going to come back stronger, angrier." His eyes softened as he looked at me. "Home is the past, but it's a past you'll need to face eventually." I sighed. "One we'll both have to face.”

Jake turned, looking down at me with a newfound brightness in his eyes. He breathed the last of the smoke out of his lungs and tossed the cigarette butt to the ground, crushing it beneath his foot. “Let’s go get drunk.”

“Yeah?” I asked, smiling at him. “You think that’ll help?”

“Can’t hurt to try,” he said, bumping into me. “Besides, I kinda want you to be all over me again.”

Rolling my eyes I pressed myself into his body, a light, teasing laugh bubbling up out of my chest. “Like this?”

He hummed, hands sliding up my back and squeezing my sides. “Yeah, like that.”

“Come on then,” I urged, leaning away from him. “Let’s go get hammered.”

Jake's fingers laced between mine, the warmth of his palm filling my own as we walked hand in hand toward Ozzy's. To the passersby, we probably looked like just another dumb-in-love couple and I was okay with that. I was happy with the thought and hopeful that it meant there was a chance for this… for us.

The group was already gathered around the bar when we arrived. As we got closer a familiar head of blonde hair and plain clothes that hid a well-toned body appeared in the center of our friends. Sam made jokes that everyone laughed at, showing off the charming personality that made everyone around him fall head over heels.

Quinn, who was already plastered, spotted us and quickly waved. “Look who decided to show up!”

Sam spread his arms out and smiled sheepishly. "You said you'd buy me a drink if I ditched the uniform."

"I did," I replied, moving from Jake's side to slide behind the bar. "What'll it be, just Sam?"

“Just beer,” he answered.

Chuckling at the memories of the way his face always scrunched up in disgust at every other drink he tried, I grabbed him a bottle. “Shoulda known. You never did enjoy anything else.”

Sam sat down across from me and shrugged. “Not for lack of trying. I think you made me every drink you knew.”

“Course she did,” Quinn said with a grin. “She liiikkkeeedd you!”

We both rolled our eyes at her, Sam’s face a little more red than before as he quietly sipped his beer. I lifted my head and found Jake standing a few feet away from the bar, the relaxation and playfulness I’d managed to pull out of him gone as he glared at the back of Sam’s head. With an easy smile, one meant to hopefully bring back what we’d spend hours in a shitty movie trying to reach, I nodded him over. “What’s your drink tonight, tough guy? I believe you were wanting to get wasted.”

He finally moved, standing at least a seat away from Sam and leaning against the bar. “Dealer’s choice.”

“Dangerous game,” I cautioned. “Giving a delinquent like me free reign over your drink.”

The smile was microscopic, but I still saw it. “I live for the thrill.”

“Alright, one mystery drink coming up.”

Quinn had slid between the dark-haired bartender and the light-haired cop, an evil grin plastered to her face as she regarded them both. “So, how’s life been treating you, Sam?”

Sam gulped. “Can’t complain.”

“I mean you could,” she urged. “I won’t tell a soul that the golden boy had a few tiffs with life.”

“I’m good, Quinny,” he insisted. “But thanks for asking.”

She turned to Jake, pinching his cheek. “And how's our resident grump?”

He slapped her hand away and glared at her. “Great.”

“Yikes! You seem extra grumpy tonight!” She giggled. “There a new stick up your ass or something?” Without a word, Jake pushed away from the bar and headed toward our usual booth. Quinn feigned a look of shock. “You think it was something I said?”

“Could you just not be a bitch for like two minutes?” I asked, shaking my head as I finished Jake and I’s drinks.

Quinn hummed. “I probably could, but it sounds pretty boring, so I’ll pass!”

Ari pulled on her arm, dragging her out of her seat and toward the dancing crowd. “Come on! I love this song!”

Will and Prue walked into the bar together, sitting down beside Sam. While Prue greeted the off-duty cop, Will set his head on the bar and sighed. “It was a pretty long night tonight, huh?”

“With Howard gone… yeah,” he answered.

“I’ll make you something strong,” I offered, getting Prue’s attention before asking, “Want anything to drink?”

“No, I’m on Will duty.” She looked over at him and gently rubbed his back. “He’s having a rough week.”

The second I touched a glass Ozzy’s loud voice boomed over the bar. “Oi! You ain’t on bar duty tonight!”

I glanced at him with an innocent smile. “I’m just helping out Oz.”

“Not tonight you’re not!” He gestured to the two bartenders already working. “I’ve got two boys back here, let em get some work in will ya? Shoo!”

“Oz-”

“Shoo!” He repeated, ushering me out from behind the bar with a shake of his head. “Go have fun. Take a load off for once, love.”

“Alright, alright!” I reached over and grabbed Jake and my drinks. “Bossy much?”

The big man scoffed and pointed at me with that fatherly smirk of his. “I shouldn’t have to be bossin you to take some time to yourself.”

Dodging the crowd I made my way to the booth where Jake sulked by himself. Patrick, who’d spent all of two seconds by the table, gave me a look and mouthed He’s grumpy on his way past me. I set the drink in front of Jake. “One Mexican Firing Squad.” He gave me a look, one that I quickly shot down with a pointed reply, “You gave me creative freedom. This is on you.”

“Right. Next time remind me not to let you pick the drinks.”

“Scooch.” He sipped on his drink, refusing the move that rigid body of his as an act of defiance. Using the empty side of the booth I slid around to sit beside him and took a victorious drink of my cocktail. I let the tense silence roll over me for a minute before finally choosing to say something. “Quinn's got a point, you do seem extra grumpy all of a sudden.” Nudging his arm I asked, “What sticks up your ass now?”

Jake scoffed and quickly downed his drink, showcasing little regret afterward. “I'm just peachy.”

I gave him a look. “Come on, Jake.”

“Don't worry about it, Princess.” His eyes shifted to Sam, who’d joined my brothers at another table, and his face scrunched lightly in clear displeasure. “I'm fine.”

“Ahh,” I hummed in realization. A funny, prideful feeling made my chest feel warmer. “So it's not a stick up your ass, it's a baton.” Jake didn't bother replying. I sat back in the booth and looked down at my fingers. “Are you jealous of Sam?”

That got him talking. “I'm not jealous of some uptight asshole cop.”

Hiding my smirk behind my glass I shrugged. “Sam's hardly an asshole and he's not very uptight.”

“Well, you'd know, wouldn't you?”

“Yeah, I would.” Tilting my head to meet his eyes I quietly asked, “Is that a problem?”

With a sigh Jake shook his head, finally allowing himself to relax. “No. It's just… He's clearly still into you and…”

“And that makes you feel… Weird, given everything that's happened between us,” I finished.

“Yeah.” He looked at me, eyes finally softening. “I'm sorry if I'm being an ass.”

Smiling wide enough to reassure him I lifted a hand to stroke his cheek. “You're almost always an ass in some way. Guess I'm getting used to it.”

With a quiet laugh, he smiled. “Good to know.” Standing he grabbed both our glasses. “I'll get us refills.”

“Jake.” I stopped him with a hand on his arm. He turned and I lifted myself out of the seat to press my lips to his. His body leaned into mine, lips moving in harmony with my own without hesitation. When we pulled away from each other I smiled again, slightly nervous to voice the reassuring words that clung to my throat. “Whatever this is… You have my full attention.”

Though he chuckled, I could see that he felt better after I said it. “Do I?”

I settled back in my seat, cheeks red and chest warm and fuzzy. “Yep. Try not to let it go to your head.”

“Too late, Princess,” he announced. “You've got my ego all inflated now.”

“Damn,” I joked. “Guess I'll have to be meaner to you.”

“Lookin’ forward to it,” he replied with a wink as he turned and headed to the bar.

My face felt hotter as I stared down into my lap. I could only imagine just how red I looked and I was glad Quinn was too busy with Ari to make fun of me. It was just so easy with Jake. The warmth and the fuzziness that came with something new and exciting was now a persistent feeling. Every moment I spent with him I felt so… Happy. It was sickening. Then there was the unknown but very obvious feeling that made me want to hop onto his lap - as I had so many times before - take that pretty face in my hands and tell him he was mine.

Something glittering in the dancing crowd caught my eye, drawing attention to the familiar entourage of finely dressed men and one woman covered in expensive jewels and an easy smile. Mav. Fucking hell. I jumped out of the booth and made my way through the crowd as quickly and as gently as I could, trying to reach the bar and give everyone a warning before…

Mav's men hung back as she settled in beside Jake. Ozzy offered her a kind if not slightly tense greeting, “Mav, didn't expect to see you here tonight.”

“I was in the neighborhood,” she replied in that sultry voice of hers as her rich amber eyes drifted to Jake. “So, this is him then? Your girls Jake?”

The two bartenders exchanged a look before Ozzy cleared his throat. “What can I get ya?”

Mav ignored him, lifting her finger to trace Jake's jaw as she grinned. "Oh he is cute, isn't he?"

I hurried forward with a loud proclamation, “MAV!” From across the room, Dom’s head shot up and he was on his feet in seconds. I tried to subtly place my body between hers and Jake's. It wasn’t so subtle, judging by the way she chuckled at me. “Long time no see. How's business?”

“Oh, you know how it goes. Money, drugs, sex, booze, bar fights, the occasional murder,” she replied with a casual shrug as she turned her head to take a sip of the drink Oz had offered up. “I can't complain.”

“Sounds fun.”

“You're more than welcome to tag along one of these days.” Mav grinned over my shoulder at Jake. “I'll even let you bring your boy toy.”

I laughed and shook my head. “Thanks but no thanks. I'm not really doing that kinda stuff anymore.”

Her eyes narrowed. “That's not what I heard.” Sliding her finger along the rim of her glass she chuckled. “You and Eddie paid one of my boys a visit not too long ago.”

“We did.”

“Fucked him up pretty bad.” Her voice was soft as silk as she smiled, baring her teeth. “I was impressed. You always did know just how to leave men a whimpering and sniffling shell.” 

“Mav I-”

She shushed me and with a long nail, she fixed my hair. “You get things done, Lena. I’ve always respected that.”

The only thing you could count on when it came to Mav was her unpredictability. And while I was confident that Mav liked me enough not to slit my throat I still chose to tread cautiously. “Do you know why I did it?”

“No. And I don't care. That boy…” She turned toward her men, her chestnut hair falling over her shoulder. “What's his name again?”

“Aaron.”

“Right,” she laughed. “Aaron. He was a huge fuck up. Wasted more of my time and money than any of my husbands. You did me a favor putting him in his place. So I came to extend my gratitude.”

Dom made his way through the crowd, eyeing her men for a minute before he stood there, staring at Mav's back. The soft look in his eyes held all the history between them. “That's awfully generous of you.”

Mav turned toward the sound of his voice, a real smile settling on her lips. “Well, well, if it isn't the junkyard king himself.” 

They looked each other up and down for a long moment. Jake leaned over my shoulder. “So… What's going on here?”

“I'll tell you later,” I whispered back.

“Mavis,” Dom said, taking her hand and lifting it to his lips.

“Dominic,” she replied, watching with gleeful delight as he kissed her hand. “Always such a gentleman.”

With a shrug, the biker straightened his back. “If I were a gentleman I'd be buried next to your other husbands.”

“True,” she admitted with a laugh.

“So,” Dom started. “Is it business or pleasure tonight?”

“Business,” Mav said. “Always business.”

With a nod he settled in at the end of the bar, casually leaning on it as he watched her. “I'm all ears.”

“My business isn't with you.” Mav turned back towards me and extended one of her signature platinum cards to me.

“Mav I can't-”

She shushed me. “Take it, dear. As a thank you for fixing a problem for me.”

“I don't need your money.”

“Nonsense!” She insisted, waving me off. “Money offers people like us a lot of freedoms. Why do you think I got rid of those pesky husbands so quickly?”

"Haven't killed all your husbands," Dom said with a fond grin.

Mav returned the look, though it was harder to see in her. "There's still time."

“This is too much.”

“Lena,” she sighed, shaking her head. “Take the money. Have some fun. Buy your boy something special.” Winking at Jake over my shoulder she set the card on the bar next to me. “You've more than earned it.”

“Thank you, Mav.”

Standing she turned to Dom and jabbed his chest with her finger. “And you. Tell that moronic brother of yours to stay off my turf.”

Dom leaned down, pressing their bodies closer together. “Whatever you say, darling.”

“I mean it. Next time Eddie shows up uninvited he's going to lose some limbs.”

“Call if you need help chopping,” he replied with a laugh. “I'd love to get a few licks in.”

“Idiots, both of you.”

Dom watched her go with a look that made me feel squeamish. I grabbed the card and turned back to Jake and the others who'd gathered at the bar behind him. “Looks like drinks are on me for the next few months.”

Quinn clapped loudly, urging the group to cheer. Sasha lifted his glass and loudly yelled, “TIGER BITCH!”

“Tiger Bitch!” Everyone joined in.

Ozzy took the card and shook his head. “I disapprove of your involvement.”

“Buuuttt…”

“I'm not going to turn down Mav's money.” He tucked the card away. “I'm no fool.”

Jake leaned on the bar next to me with a curious grin. “So, what's the story there?”

“Mav is Dom's ex-wife.” Glancing over at the biker I shook my head before loudly announcing, “And there's clearly some lingering sexual tension.”

He glared at me. Nodding toward Jake he answered, “You sure you wanna go there, kid?”

Holding my hands up in defeat I shook my head. “Never mind.”

“Yeah, that's what I thought.”

Turning back to Jake I shrugged. “She's relentless and kind of terrifying, but she likes me so it's alright.”

He laughed and accepted another drink from Oz. “You and your gangsters. So, how much money was on that card?”

“At least ten grand.”

Jake spit his drink out and coughed. “Are you serious?”

Nodding, I smirked. “Me and my gangsters.”

Oz tossed him a bar rag. “Oi, clean that up.”

“Sorry Oz,” he replied, wiping up his mess.

Sam set his empty bottle on the bar and thanked Ozzy when he took it. “Sooo, I just ran into Mav on her way out. You, uh, spending time with her again?”

I shook my head. “No, I just…” As I looked up into his eyes I could see the cringe settle on his face. He was begging me not to say something incriminating, so I chuckled and finished with, “Walked her dog.”

The cop in him saw straight through the lie, but the friend in him just laughed. “That’s what you’re sticking with?”

“She has three big dogs,” I argued. “I could have walked one!”

“When have you ever walked her dogs?”

My mouth hung open as my brain desperately tried to conjure up any instance where I’d done more than pet her dogs. “When… She… I… Shut up!”

Out of the corner of my eye, I watched Jake grab another drink and down it just as quickly as he had the first. Maybe getting drunk wasn’t the best idea to encourage. Before I could offer him any kind of reassurance Patrick hollered from their table, “Jake!”

The second he moved from my side I sighed, watching him sit down beside my brothers and talk. Sam glanced that way and smiled. “It’s nice to see those two haven’t lost their tendency to adopt your… friends.”

“Yeah. They always seem to find the guys I bring home so interesting.”

“In their defense. You do have an interesting taste in men.” He gestured to himself, wiggling his eyebrows. “I mean just look at me! Suburban good boy with the dream to become a cop!”

I laughed. “You are very interesting, Sammy.”

“And handsome,” he added.

“That too.”

Sam’s eyes returned to that table. “So… It seems like Jake makes you happy. I’m glad you found him.”

“Yeah,” I mumbled. “Me too.”

All at once the memories of Sam and I came flooding my brain. We’d had a lot of good times, a lot of passion, and more vulnerability than I’d ever been able to muster up at the time. On paper, Sam was everything I could have wanted. Good, kind, gentle, strong, smart and funny. My dads and brothers and friends all loved him. It should have worked. Should have, but didn’t. And it didn’t because of me. After a long, still silence, I quietly admitted, "I've been thinking about a lot of stuff recently. About that fight we had."

Sam shook his head, his smile only faltering a little. "Don't, Lena."

I looked at him long and hard, the man who could've given me everything I'd wanted at the time. "I'm sorry for being so horrible to you."

"You were hardly horrible, Lee."

"I was a bitch."

With a sigh, he turned fully toward me. "Do you remember what I said to you?"

"You wanted to know why-"

"After that."

My jaw clenched as I nodded. "I do."

"Then I guess I don't." The words burnt me from the inside out, venomous and ugly… A reflection of myself.

Sam looked sad… Heartbroken maybe, but he still smiled at me. "That's okay."

Liar, I'd wanted to say. But, Sam just sighed and stepped closer. "It's okay if you don't love me back, Lee. It's okay if you don't want this to be anything more than some fun casual thing. I just… I wanted us to be on the same page so I don't go sayin something stupid again and making you upset."

"Get out."

"Lena-"

Tears streamed down my cheeks as I stepped away from him. Hideous emotions spurring life inside my chest. Angry wounds urging me to hit him, to scream at him and destroy everything we ever had. A monster lurking over my shoulder with a taunting whisper, "I'm the only one that could ever love you."

"Get out," I repeated. "Please, Sam."

Sam's reassuring hand on my own pulled me from that dark memory. "I love you, Lena."

My throat felt tight as I stared up at him, longing to return the words but unable to. "I know."

"I love you," he repeated with a smile. "In whatever way you need me to."

"I'm sorry." Sorry, I can't say it back. Sorry, I couldn't keep myself from hurting you. "For all of it."

His smile was blinding as he squeezed my hand. "I'm not. So it didn't work out in the end, big deal. We still had some fun, didn't we?"

I smiled too, the fond memories of Sam gently soothing the heavy weight in my chest. "Yeah, we did."

"And, we turned out to be pretty good friends, right?"

"Perfect friends."

Clearing his throat, Sam checked his watch. “Well, I’ve got to go. I’m working tomorrow morning.”

Before I could talk myself out of it, I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around him. “Don’t be a stranger, okay?”

He squeezed me tight and chuckled. “I won’t be. I’ll just remember to leave the uniform at home.”

“Good idea. Goodnight, Sammy.”

“Night, Lee.” He stood and waved at everyone else. “See you around.”

“See you around, Sammy.”

*

Jake had vacated the Harrow brothers’ table shortly after they’d waved him over for Patrick’s rundown of his schedule after Thanksgiving. “You’ll need to get in some solid reps after having Nana’s food,” Patrick had said with a loud laugh. 

The fact that he’d just assumed, expected, Jake to be attending their family celebrations only made Simone’s plans for him sting worse. He wanted to go to Nana’s - wanted to spend the day surrounded by the loud Harrow gang’s chaos. He wanted to leave full and happy, smelling like meat and curry. There was nothing Jake wanted more in the world than to spend just one holiday in a place where he felt he belonged. 

He’d excused himself and walked outside to the front of Ozzy’s bar, just breathing in the fresh air and wallowing in his self-pity. How many years had it been that he’d followed Simone back to the fucking Cape every holiday? How many years had Jake spent miserable and stuck so far in the past that he felt like he was drowning? 

“Home is the past.” He still remembered the night Tess had said those words to him. At the time it wasn’t about her saying them, it was the feeling he felt hearing it. Jake had kissed her that night and had made plans with her that deep down he knew he wouldn't be able to keep but all of that had been less about Tess and more about those four simple words.  Home is the past. 

"Home is the past, but it's a past you'll need to face eventually. One we'll both have to face.” Lena was right. He’d spent every year getting dragged back, every single year for as long as he could remember, running from The Cape… home… until that word held nothing but dread and anger and pain.

Home, he thought to himself, letting his eyes drift closed - letting the word sit in his mind for a moment. Home. It wasn’t Cape Cod his brain associated with the thought of a home. It wasn’t Simone or the restaurant or even his apartment. It was red hair glowing in the setting sun, loud laughter, and a crinkling freckled nose. It was soft touches, dancing, making drinks. It was late-night walks, kisses on the Ferris wheel, and that addictive tightness in his gut that made everything in him feel more alive every second he spent by her side. Home was waking up to Lena’s green eyes and her tired smile. Home was her.

Whatever this was between them, this unnamed thing, this thing they both seemed so afraid of… it was everything. Jake opened his eyes and the name for it was right there, sitting in his mind like Hemingway curled up on one of his chairs. This was something he never thought it could be, yet the one thing that now seemed so obvious.

Forcing himself to let the word go, Jake turned back to the door and walked down the steps into the bar. Lena had hopped back behind the bar, helping serve drinks as Ozzy shook his head from the office door, insisting that she go have fun. He could practically hear her sassy, “This is fun” from there. The blonde cop carefully made his way out of the crowd of people and smiled at him, stopping to wave. “Hey, Jake. You heading out?”

“No,” he answered. “Just needed some air.”

He nodded and turned to look back at the bar. “I get that. Bars aren’t really my scene either.”

Course they aren’t, he thought to himself. A goody two shoes like Officer Mayfield wouldn’t find bars appealing. He didn’t harbor the same sadness or anger that most people did. He didn’t really get the reason why bars like this were so popular and it made Jake feel like he did around Will. Inadequate. Pathetic. Broken.

"You're lucky," Sam said after a moment of stiff silence.

Jake bit back a bitter laugh. "Am I?"

The officer nodded, eyes never leaving the bar. "She's incredible."

His eyes shifted, following the blondes until Lena filled his vision again. "Yeah, she is."

Once again the man beside him smiled. "She's different with you… Open and happy. You're lucky, not a lot of people get to see that side of her."

Lucky. It was one of Jake's least favorite words. After all that had happened to him, all he'd been forced to find a way to survive luck was just another thing he never had. Yet, standing in the booming bar, surrounded by friends, he had to agree with Officer Mayfield. Lena met his gaze and smiled, pouring a drink as she winked at him. He was lucky. Maybe for the first time in his life.

Sam gave him a pat on the shoulder. "Don't fuck it up. There isn't another girl out there like her, trust me."

Against his better judgment Jake nodded, "If there is, I'm sure you'll find her."

"Thanks," Sam replied. "See you around, Jake."

"See you around, Officer Mayfield."

"Please," the man said with a chuckle. "Call me Sam."

“Alright… Sam.”

After a few more drinks and a few more hours of listening to rowdy bar conversations, while being completely distracted by Lena, the night was over. Quinn and Ari went back to her hotel, Prue and Will went back to his apartment and everyone else slowly filtered out until it was just him and the Harrows. Lena rested her head on the top of the bar, lazily sloshing the remainder of her drink around in her glass with a tired look in her eyes. Patrick helped Ozzy close the bar down while Peter closed the bar down and Oz handled some paperwork. 

It was organized, methodical, and something he found peaceful. Lena looked at him and smiled. “Well, did drinking make you feel better?”

He shrugged. “Neither of us got nearly fucked up enough. You didn’t even drunkenly grope me.”

Clicking her tongue she lightly tapped him with her foot. “There, consider yourself groped.”

Patrick made a face. “Could you two please wait until I’m out of earshot to do that?”

“Well,” Lena said, choosing to ignore her brother. “You’re welcome to stay with us tonight.”

“I should go back to my place,” Jake admitted. “I gotta feed the cat or he’ll tear my sheets to shreds.”

“That would be a shame. Your sheets are amazing.” She sat up, stretching her limbs for a second before finding her footing. “I’ll walk you out.”

Jake followed her, giving the rest of them a short farewell before they stepped out into the cold night. Lena shivered and without a second thought, Jake slid off his jacket and wrapped it around her shoulders. He watched, smiling like an idiot, as she did a little dance and happily shoved her arms through the openings. 

They walked up the road a few feet before stopping. Everything he realized, everything he felt, pulsed through him like an ocean current as he looked at her yet he couldn’t bring himself to voice any of them. Luckily, Lena seemed to have found some courage in one of the glasses she’d drank that night. “So, I… I know we have a lot to discuss about…” She awkwardly gestured between them. “Us. And I know that with everything going on, there hasn’t really been a good time to… you know, talk.”

“We don’t have to do this right now.”

“I know,” she whispered. “I just… I guess I want you to know that I meant it.”

Jake tilted his head slightly, a subconscious movement to cover up the way his heart stuttered. “Meant what?”

She stepped closer and smiled, her green eyes sparkled beneath the city lights. “You have my full attention, Jake. I… I don’t know what this is or what we’re doing but… I like it. I like you.” Lena slowly lifted herself up to press her lips to his just like she had in the bar. And just like that, everything else didn’t matter. Once she pulled away a blush settled on her cheeks.  “So, yeah… I just wanted you to know that.”

For the first time that night, Jake truly smiled. His hands cupped her cheeks and he kissed her again. “You’ve got my full attention too, Princess.”

“Give Hemingway a hug for me,” she said, alcohol-ridden breath fanning across his lips. He opened his mouth to tease her about calling him by the name she insisted didn’t fit, but Lena quickly slapped his arm. “Don’t say it!”

“Alright,” he said smugly. “I’ll save it for later.”

“Goodnight, Jake.”

“Goodnight, Lena.”

That night, with Hemingway curled up by his feet Jake stared at his empty suitcase and the text message Simone had sent him about the time she wanted him to be at her apartment for their trip. He didn’t want to go to Cape Cod. He wanted to go to dinner with Lena’s family, to laugh and joke and eat until he couldn’t move. Jake wanted to stay home. And he would. This time he’d stay.

*

Thanksgiving morning was always interesting at the Harrow house. When our dad was alive he’d spend all day in the kitchen prepping his famous turkey for the journey to Nana’s diner. In the years that followed his death, Peter had taken his place, spending hours upon hours slow-cooking the damn bird. The first year it was blackened and completely inedible. The years that followed he got progressively better until he was unable to cook at all due to his cancer. Nana and Abdul covered the turkey for a while, but now Pete was back and he was determined to perfect the bird this year.

So, I woke to the smell of cooking meat and the blaring of Pat’s music. I ate breakfast with my brothers and gave Peter some tips for his bird and then I was off to work. Scott had asked that all the kitchen crew show up early so we could get ahead of the night before it took any turns for the worst. Will had made a similar request, one everyone had scoffed at and would likely ignore.

The walk that morning was peaceful. Stores put up their black Friday signs and everyone on the streets had a nicer demeanor than they usually did, a phenomenon that was strictly reserved for the holidays and even then this was still New York City. 22West had decorated the stairs with a garland of fall leaves and the door with a wreath, but other than that it remained the same at Aunt Maddie’s insistence no doubt.

My heart dropped into my stomach as I walked through the front door and saw just Nicky behind the bar greeting me with a smile. “Morning, Red.”

“Morning,” I answered, just as another man, older and definitely not my grumpy bartender, returned from the kitchen with a pallet of glasses. Finding the strength to move my feet and smile through the hellish pain that now stabbed my chest I extended a hand to the unknown face I said, “I don't think we've met before.”

The man shook my hand with a relieved chuckle, “Names Sam. I'm the one they call when they run outta options.”

“I'm sure they call you because you're good at your job, Sam. I'm Lena.”

His eyes narrowed slightly. “You look familiar.”

“We've probably seen each other in passing at some point,” I replied. “I’ve been around for a while.”

“You're Maddie's niece!” Snapping his fingers he laughed. “Oh, last time I saw you, you were only ye big.” He lifted a hand to his stomach, showcasing the size he spoke of.

Awkwardly laughing I shrugged. “Sounds like me. Well, it was nice meeting you, or seeing you again I guess.”

The old man Sam chuckled and returned to his work. “You too.”

Scott was barking orders when I entered the kitchen and headed for the stairs. The locker room was uncharacteristically quiet as I changed. No Sasha to make his crude jokes, no Ari to laugh at them, no Heather to chide them both… No Jake to make me feel warm and fuzzy. I bitterly swallowed a lump in my throat as I found myself wanting to cry. Pull it together, Lena. This was his decision, I reminded myself. It was his choice. And then, the steady thoughts shifted to the truth of what I felt. But he didn’t choose me. My fingers deftly buttoned up my chef's coat as I shook my head. Nope. We’re not doing that. I wouldn’t let myself resent his choice to go with Simone. I wouldn’t let myself turn into her, not even for one fraction of a second.

Closing my locker I headed downstairs and jumped into work, burying myself in it. Burying everything I felt, everything I wanted to feel beneath the sauces and spices and chopping of meat and vegetables. Nothing else mattered, nothing but the food in front of me. And for a while that worked. Then, service started and everything went to shit.

Sasha barreled through the kitchen doors and set his plate down on the table with a loud clack. “Table fourteen says this is overcooked.”

“Like hell it is!” Scott argued, rushing over to inspect it. “God damn rich assholes. Refire on fourteen.”

Heather followed after, setting down two soups. “Table five says the soups are cold.”

A vein in Scott’s neck looked seconds away from bursting. “Who are they, fuckin Neely? Refire two soups!”

Ari came in hot on Heather’s heels. “Table twelve wants two more entrees.”

Scott wiped the sweat from his forehead and sighed. “Fucking Thanksgiving.”

“Lena!” Will hollered, rushing up from the wine cellar. “We’re getting fucked out there, would you please hop on and help us?”

I glanced at Scott, who reluctantly nodded, and stripped myself of my coat. “Sure thing, boss.”

From that point on whatever needed done, I was on top of it. Bar restocks, serving, scouring the wine cellar, dishes, all of it was my wheelhouse tonight. And again, for a while that worked. It took my mind off of Jake and Simone and the fucking Cape. It took my mind off of everything else because all that mattered at the moment was the work. And then, just like before, it all went to shit.

I helped Santos scrub the last of the dishes before Ari tapped my shoulder and gave me a weird look. “Uh, table four is requesting you.”

“What?”

She gulped. “It’s… It’s your mom.”

Fuck. I sighed and dried my hands off. “Of course it is.”

Sure enough, there she was, sitting in the center of the lobby with a gleaming smile on her face. I straightened my shoulders and walked out toward her with a blank expression. She wasn’t gonna fucking win. Not tonight. Not if I could help it. “Good afternoon, maam. What can I get for you tonight?”

Jennifer laughed. “Come now, darling. I think we can drop the formalities.”

“Fine. Tell me what the fastest way to get you out of here is.”

“I’ll have the special and a bottle of your finest red. After that, a conversation.” She grinned again. “Quite reasonable, isn’t it?”

I turned on my heel and took her order to the kitchen before spending far too long in the cellar, picking out the shittiest wine I could find before returning to her table. She sent the food back, of course, and spilled her wine and made the night an absolute horror. While all the other guests began to funnel out, Jennifer remained until I finally snapped. “What do you fucking want?”

“Some appreciation,” she bit back. “For once in your goddamn life, could you just be grateful for all that I’ve done for you?”

Though it didn’t make the situation easier, it certainly made me feel better to laugh in her face. “You didn’t give me shit.”

"I made you strong," she said with a proud raise of her head.

"No, you didn't," I replied coldly. "You almost destroyed me. You gave me nightmares. You made me feel so inferior I got addicted to drugs trying to earn your love. You sold me… groomed me to be his. He may have been the one that almost killed me, but you were the one that pulled the strings and I hate you for it." Hot tears streamed down my cheeks as I held her stare. "I hate you. I will always hate you. No matter how many times you show up and insert yourself into my life that will never fucking change."

Jennifer sneered, “I am your mother.”

Shaking my head I replied, “No. My mother was a teacher and a painter. She took care of me, taught me, protected me more than you ever did.” Her lips thinned as she glared at me, clearly displeased I'd brought up Rada. “My mother died trying to protect me. She's gone and still, I love her more than I've ever loved you.”

“You ungrateful little-”

I set the check on her table. “Pay and get the fuck out.”

As I walked away I could hear her huffing and puffing, but in the end I’d won. By the time I’d come back she was gone. Closing everything down for the night took longer than usual, but once we’d all finished and changed we parted ways with relieved smiles. Sasha and Ari walked with me to Nana’s. It was a beautiful sight, her large window painted with a big cartoon turkey and my family inside setting the huge line of tables they’d pulled together to make enough room. As much as I felt relieved, happy, that I was here with them I couldn’t quite shake the anger and the hurt that Jennifer’s visit had brought me. She served as a reminder of those three years I spent away from my family, and I fucking hated it. 

“How was work?” Abdul asked from behind the counter as we all funneled in.

I reached over the counter and grabbed one of the beers from the cooler, popping it open and practically chugging it before answering with a hoarse, “Just great.”

Nodding he gestured to the back. “I'll grab the tequila.”

“Thanks, Pop Pop.”

“There you all are!” Nana cheered, greeting us with hugs and kisses as she searched the crowd with her eyes. “Happy Thanksgiving my dears!”

Sasha and Ari spared me a look as I took another swig of my drink. They quickly began mumbling thank yous and holiday wishes. “Yep, Happy Thanks-fucking-giving.”

She frowned, swatting my arm with one of her magazines. “Language, Lena!”

“Sorry,” I said, hoping the word would somehow help alleviate how shitty I felt about my mothers’ appearance tonight, and about how I knew that Jake was miserable.

Nana sighed and stroked my cheek. “Smile, Habibi. Today is a day for thanks and for happiness. We are all together, that is what matters, yes?”

Not all of us… “Yeah.”

“Good,” she said, turning around to holler toward the kitchen. “Hurry with the food boys, our guests are getting hungry!”

The kitchen door opened and Abdul led Patrick and Peter out with hands filled with various meats and side dishes that all looked and smelt amazing. A foot caught the door just before it closed and a sarcastic, familiar voice, called out. “Thanks for holding the door, dickhead.”

Nana turned, quick as a whip. “Jake! Language!”

My heart stopped. Jake. The dark-haired bartender stepped out of the kitchen with a roguish grin. “Sorry Nana.” He bent down a kissed her cheek, moving to follow Patrick to the tables when his eyes met mine. Beneath his unwavering gaze, I felt tears start to build in my eyes as the relief of seeing him… Of him being here soothed the ache in my chest.

Sasha threw an arm around my shoulder and wagged a finger in his face. "Jakey! We weren't expecting to see your grumpy face tonight!"

Ari settled in her seat next to Quinn and smiled. "Yeah, what happened to going to The Cape?"

His eyes never left mine as he shrugged and answered simply, "Fuck The Cape."

I smiled, a light laugh escaping from my tight throat as I shook my head, reaching out to take one of the plates from him. "Here, let me help you."

“Thanks, Princess.”

The noise of my family was loud as ever, but all I seemed to be able to hear was Jake. Everything he said, every move he made, I was perfectly honed into him… Half expecting this to be a dream. We sat next to each other as Nana and Abdul said their prayers and thanked everyone for coming. Peter stood, unveiling the perfectly cooked turkey and eating up the oos and aahs that filled the diner. “Finally an edible turkey!”

Katie jabbed Patrick in the ribs. “Be nice!”

“I’m always nice,” my brother insisted leaning in to give her a big, wet kiss.

Isaac kissed Peter as he sat back down. “It looks amazing babe!”

Jake’s hand slid onto my knee and gave it a gentle squeeze. His eyes stayed focused ahead as he complemented the food, “Everything looks amazing.”

Nana smiled from across the table. “Thank you for coming so early to help, sweet Jake.”

“Yeah, thank’s sweet Jake,” Patrick taunted.

“How long have you been here?” I asked, looking up at him, still shocked.

“He showed up this morning,” Nana replied. “Knocked on our door like a polite gentleman and asked what we needed.”

Abdul laughed. “Poor boys been worked half to death!”

Jake smiled and shrugged, looking a bit awkward as he insisted, “It wasn’t that bad.”

“We even made his favorite dessert,” Nana proudly leaned over to lift a pie into the air. “Lemon meringue.”

He came this morning… That meant… Jake had chosen to stay. He’d chosen not to go with Simone and to come here instead. I forced myself to act normally as we all dished up and stuffed our mouths with delicious food, but nothing could contain my smile and the surge of joy that filled me. Jake had stayed. He chose me.

The night was filled with laughter and dancing and drinking and more food than any of us could even attempt to finish. When we’d all had our fill and packed ourselves leftovers, Nana and Abdul gathered help from Dom and the bikers to deliver the rest to those in need. I stood outside and watched the lot carefully pack the boxes onto their bikes when Jake walked out and stood beside me. “It’s pretty cool they donate some of the food.”

“Yeah,” I replied. “Nana and Abdul are kind of the best.”

“They really are.”

"I'm really glad you came tonight," I finally whispered looking up at the faint stars in the sky. "It was… A rough day."

"Yeah, I heard." Glancing at him he shrugged. "Sasha's a gossip."

I nodded, picking at my fingers. "Right, shoulda known."

"I know it doesn't mean much coming from me, but… I'm proud of you for standing up to her." He bumped me with his shoulder. "Wish I coulda been there to see it."

Without even meaning to, the words slipped out, “I thought you went home.”

Jake’s eyes stayed glued to mine as he answered, “I did.”

My eyes filled with tears again, ones I quickly blinked away as I lifted myself to kiss him. The cold air sent goosebumps rising on my arms, but as Jake cradled my face in his hands and kissed me back with equal passion and fervor, I’d never felt warmer.

*

"Anthony," she breathed out with a fresh smile as she entered the empty restaurant. "It's so good to see you again!"

He smiled at her and Olivia felt like the most important girl in the world. Anthony lounged in the chair and replied with equal enthusiasm, "It's good to see you too, Olivia." Reaching out, he brushed her hair out of her face, eyes lighting up with that mirthful glow. “I love what you've done with your hair.”

“Thank you.” She settled in beside him and blushed. “I was surprised when Jen told me you wanted to have dinner together.”

“Why?” He questioned. “You’re a beautiful and fascinating woman, Olivia. Any man, myself included, would be blessed to be in your company.”

She blushed and shook her head, looking around the restaurant that she hated so much. “Why here?”

Anthony shrugged, taking a modest sip of his wine. “Because we can.”

"Did you need help with something?" She asked, changing the subject in an attempt to ground herself.

"As a matter of fact I do," he replied, carefully turning the book on the table towards her. "I need you to tell me everything you know about this woman."

Olivia's brows furrowed as she examined the drawing on the page. "Simone?"

Anthony nodded encouragingly. "An associate of mine has been in some contact with her, but he's having some… Difficulty. Jennifer assured me you would be able to help."

"Of course!" She cheered. "Anything for you!"

Tapping the page with his finger he grinned again. "Good. Now, tell me about this Simone."

They spent the whole night talking. It was mostly about Simone, but Olivia didn’t mind. As long as she could talk to him, to hear that amazingly soothing voice of his, she was perfectly happy. Food was served and, to her at least, a good time was had before Howard approached the table. His face was bruised and swollen and clearly unhappy as he moved to the side, gesturing with his hand to a painting on the wall behind him. “Does this satisfy your request?”

Anthony tilted his head, truly examining the piece before he smiled. “It does.”

Oliva’s eyes devoured the unique-looking thing, admiring the bright colors and the almost violence the art radiated. She was about to comment on his taste in art when she noticed the tiny scribbled name in the corner. 

Lena.

[payattentiontothescreen]

Bridgerton Rewatch S1E1 - Diamond of the First Water (Part 2)

Here's part 2 of the S1E1 Rewatch

Something I noticed is that Eloise has a lot of sympathy for Daphne when it comes to the whole Berbrooke thing. She tries to stay with Daphne when he’s the only one who calls on her. In general, they’re a lot closer here than they are once Berbrooke is out of the picture.

Thinking back on it and watching the show again, Pen is the only one who could have ever been Lady Whistledown. Given the derision and abuse she’s been through by the entire ton, especially her own mother, she’s a teenager who’s lashing out. She’s an afterthought to everyone except Colin and Eloise.

Speaking of Colin and Penelope, he has always thought highly of her. When he’s leaving the Featheringtons after calling on Marina, Pen is the only one he says goodbye to. He doesn’t even bid Marina farewell; it’s just Pen.

Daphne and Eloise have very similar views on their place in the world. Daphne does not like that marriage is her only option. She has just made her peace with it.

Lady Whistledown’s dig at Marina’s “pretty little slippered feet” was so obviously Pen, I don’t know how anyone thought it wasn’t her.

The Queen’s dismissal of Daphne is a good early indicator of how much she cares about LWD’s opinion.

I need more Violet/Lady Danbury scheming. They’re both so clever, the matchmaking worked wonders.

This next note says “Anthony shut the fuck up challenge.” Again, no idea what that’s in reference to but it’s applicable to any scene he’s in.

So they plant a Cressida/Colin dynamic really early on of her wanting to be with him. Not much on this here, I’m just looking forward to seeing how that plays out in season 3.

What drives me crazy is that Colin DOES NOT LET GO OF PEN’S HAND when the music stops. They aren’t dancing anymore but Colin is still holding Pen’s hand. Idiots in love at its finest.

Not gonna lie, those lights are sick.

Season 1 Anthony has 2 modes: pompous idiot or callous asshole. He manages to be both when he tells Daphne that he promised her to Berbrooke.

Quick Marina sidebar - first, I couldn’t imagine just having to bleed through on my period. That sounds like hell. Second, it would never happen but I would love if Marina slapped Lady F back. Full on “They Call Me Mr. Tibbs!” action.

Back to Daphne, we’re at the attempted assault scene. Something that I noticed this time around is that Berbrooke is pissed at Daphne because, to him, she thinks she’s better than him. The thing is, she is technically higher class than he is. He comes from a barony; she’s the daughter of a viscount. In a purely hierarchical sense, she is better than him. She comes from a better family. And I know that there’s the gender politics involved here but I’m choosing to ignore them because they are stupid.

I’ve watched this show several times. Daphne punching Berbrooke in the face will always be satisfying as fuck.

I’d like to take this bullet point to say that Simon is iconic. His dialogue is so well-written. Love it.

End of episode thoughts: This is a really well-done pilot. It marries romance, drama, and comedy amazingly. I’m looking forward to seeing what else I find on a closer inspection of the series.

Thanks for going on this journey with me. S1E2 will be up tomorrow? Maybe? It depends on how busy I am with grad school.

Have a great day!

[tilbageidanmark]

MOVIES I WATCHED THIS WEEK (#192):

TRANCES (1981) is an infectious documentary about the influential Moroccan avant-pop band 'Nass El Ghiwane'. It's like 'The last Waltz' but in Casablanca. A must for fans of traditional Arabic music.

This was the first film that Martin Scorsese restored when he launched his "World Cinema Foundation" in 2007. My 4th Moroccan film. A transcendental experience [with one caveat: They gave amazing concerts to large, ecstatic crowds - and not a single woman in the audience!] This is the 9th film from the Scorsese's list that I've seen. I must remember to come back to it very soon.

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(Another concert, but of a completely different kind: Andrea Bochelli's LOVE IN PORTOFINO. This is for the folks who like to sit in the square by the water when the evening falls, dressed in white cottons, sip white wine while eating fried clams or seafood pizza, while listening to Bochelli's frothy, sentimental baritone.)

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POOL OF LONDON (1951), my 5th drama-Noir from mostly-forgotten master Basil Dearden. Sailors on leave and a jewel heist, as well as a sensitive interracial romance, the first white and Jamaican relationship in British cinema. Crisp on-location scenes and good character development.

Next: His 'The League of Gentlemen'.

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I've developed an interest in the emerging sub-genre of 'Domestic Workers’, mostly movies from South America and Southeast Asia. Many of these are fantastic; 'Àma Gloria', 'The second mother', 'Lina from Lima', 'Roma', 'The maid', 'Ilo Ilo', 'The chambermaid', Etc.

But I did not expect for the documentary YAYA (2018) to emerge as the most touching of this week's movies. A young filmmaker in Hong Kong, Justin Cheung, turned the camera on his own family, to explore their relationship with the woman who took care of him the first 22 years of his life.

Philippine Au-pairs in Hong Kong are some of the most exploited and abused workers in the world. And while his helper-maid was not mistreated, she gave up her own life to take care of somebody else's kids. Recommended! 8/10.

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FELLINI X 2:

🍿 (I have no idea why I never seen this masterpiece.) LA STRADA (1954), is the sad and poignant story of simple-minded Giulietta Masina, who was sold to 'brutish strongman' Anthony Quinn for 10,000 lire. She's a mythic, Chaplinesque 'Fool' who's being abused and mistreated as she joins him traveling round the countryside in their little freak-show. Until she dies of a heartbreak. Its tragedy is accented by Nino Rosi's sentimental score. 8/10.

🍿 THE MAGIC HOUR (2008), my second screwball comedy [After 'Welcome back, Mr. McDonald'] by Kōki Mitani, "The Best Japanese Filmmaker You've Never Heard Of". A failed bit actor gets a job to play a mysterious hit man, not realizing that the movie he's starring in is going to be 'real'. It's a lighthearted meta-film about making a movie, not unlike 'Day for night', but set in some seaport gangster-land. It's like 'Casablanca' but with a Nino Rosi like score. Includes a cameo of director Kon Ichikawa, the last before his death.

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3 MORE BY KEN LOACH:

🍿 THE OLD OAK, the latest (and probably his very last film) from the 88-year-old socialist Brit. A warm and 'humane' story full of small and heartfelt emotions, it kept me in tears from opening to the end. Ordinary people who suffer in so many ways. The inhabitants of a decaying ex-mining town can barely manage to hang on, and now they have to deal with a group of Syrian refugees - "Foreigners!" - who had lost it all in the war, and are being repatriated to their midst. Loach's films are usually about working-class Brits who's been getting the shaft for generations, and sometimes retain their humanity. And so is this one. 9/10.

🍿 “First they called you a terrorist, they they called you a hero”.

11′09″01 SEPTEMBER 11 is an anthology film from 2002. Eleven filmmakers contributed each a segment of 11 minutes and 9 seconds with different perspectives on the World Trade Center attacks. Some of the productions were better than others. Ken Loach had a Chilean exile in London write a letter to the families of the victims with the story of the Chilean September 11 attack of democracy (1973/CIA/Kissinger/Pinochet). In the Iranian segment, a teacher in a refugee camp was trying unsuccessfully to tell her young pupils about the attack. A poor boy in Burkina Faso imagined that he saw Osama bin Ladin in the market, and that he can use the $25M reward money to help his dying mom. Claude Lelouch told of a deaf French woman who sits next to the TV, but misses the news because she can't hear it. A Bosnian woman goes to the scheduled demonstration about the Srebrenica massacre. Etc. A mixed bag.

🍿 TIME TO GO is his 1989 documentary, pushing for British withdrawal from Northern Ireland. I actually don't know more than the average laymen about Irish history, so I need to take a reading course about the "Troubles" and what brought it.

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Another first watch: TRAINSPOTTING (1996). There were half a dozen films which I avoided until now, because I felt, rightly or wrongly, that they are too distressing: 'Requiem for a dream', Lars von Trier's 'Melancholia' (actually, all his movies), 'Salò', 'Funny Games' (both versions), 'A Serbian film', 'Kids', Etc. But now that I crossed 'Come and see' off this list, I also took a stab at this disgusting Scottish Heroin-chic shite-storm. Now I can say that I saw it too.

Well, I like Kelly Macdonald, and didn't expect her debut in an under-aged sex scene... Another plus, an appropriate use for Lou Reed's 'A perfect day'.

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TIME PIECE, a terrific experimental 9-minute short by Jim Hanson which was nominated for an Oscar in 1965. A rhythmic masterpiece: "Help!" 8/10.

Extra: ROBOT (1963), another prophetic Hanson short, precursor to 'HAL9000'. I'm sure that both these films will be mentioned in his new bio-pic.

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2 EARLY FILMS BY LINDSAY ANDERSON:

🍿 THE WHITE BUS (1967) told of a a taciturn young woman without a name who takes a double-Decker bus tour in a city without a future to experience some bizarre scenes without any rhyme or reason. It includes some surrealistic flourishes (A sudden tableaux of 'Le Dejeuner sur l'Herbe', a fantasy about suicide, a long tour in the library where the pompous major keeps complaining about filthy books...). But what is the point of it all?

It was edited by Kevin Brownlow, and filmed by Miroslav Ondříček, But it will mostly be remembered as the film debut of one 30-year-old Anthony Hopkins, as a German Thespian reciting Brecht. 2/10.

🍿 O DREAMLAND (1953) is a macabre documentary short about a loud amusement park in Margate, Kent, and the multitudes of middle class patrons (and their many children) who visit it without much amusement in their eyes. It's melancholy and miserable and dour. 7/10. A fun Fair without the fun. (Screenshot Above).

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"This guy is a one-man crime wave!"

FOR HEAVEN’S SAKE (1926), one of Harold Lloyd's most successful films. Including some great chase and slapstick gags.

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The first time I saw DEREK DELGAUDIO's IN & OF ITSELF, I was blown away. The next 2 or 3 times I thought it was great. There's something that compelled me to return to this Magician-"Mentlist" installation piece again and again. But after 4 or 5 times, i realize what he's doing, and his shtick is not as polished as f. ex. Derren Brown's. Yes, he has a few numbers that looks fantastic (A random audience member picks a random letter from a pile, and opens it to read a personal letter from her dying father... The final sketch where he "knows" what secret cards did each and every member of the audience had picked), but for the rest, he's mostly manipulates us with shaggy anecdotes and tall tales of personal pains. And really, they are not as profound as he wants us to believe they are.

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Hiroshi Teshigahara's HOKUSAI is a 1953 documentary about the woodblock artist, but a bit too old fashioned. I recently saw his 'The face of another', and should have watched 'Woman in the dunes' instead.

🍿

THE SUITCASE was episode 7 of 4th season of 'Mad Men', the exact middle of the series (46/92). I've seen it numerous times, and it's still one of the most emotionally gripping. Jon Hamm will never be as perfect as he was as Don Draper. And it's pretty amazing that he and Peggy Olsen never even kissed, let alone sleep together. 10/10. Re-watch ♻️. [*Female Director*]

🍿

"If there's one thing about me, it's repetition"...

My first by British comedian Steward Lee, his latest LIVE AT THE LOWRY came recommended by Hoots maguire, so here I am. Lee is a different kind of a stand-up: Dry, self-referential, erudite, and circular. His improvisations are jazzy. Recommended.

🍿

2 ALTERNATIVE-QUEER ANIMATIONS:

🍿 THE FINAL EXIT OF THE DISCIPLES OF ASCENSIA (2019) is a strange - and weird - story made by one young Jonni Peppers. It is done very much in the aesthetics, and spirit, of Don Hertzfeldt's 'World of Tomorrow', although it's far from being that coherent. A confused young woman joins an all-women UFO-cult, which, like the Heaven's Gate dudes, eventually "ascends". It doesn't really have a clear message, but it has quiet a few moments of beauty. Peppers is working with Victoria Vincent, whose film 'A dog that smokes weed' I've admired. The two songs she plays are very pretty. [*Female Director*]

🍿 HOW TO FIND LOVE IN AN UNBECOMING AGE, a first film by a young lesbian about hot dating today. Could become a series. 7/10. [*Female Director*]

🍿

3 MORE SHORTS BY FEMALE DIRECTORS:

🍿 3 MINUTOS (1999), a short Brazilian masterpiece. The phone rings in a kitchen, and the answering machine picks it up. A woman's voice is telling him that she decided to leave. Recommended. 9/10.

[This is actually the second film by Ana Luíza Azevedo I've seen. She co-directed 'Barbosa' with Jorge Furtado.]

🍿 LIKE TWENTY IMPOSSIBLES, my first by Palestinian Annemarie Jacir. A small Palestinian film crew is trying to cross a border checkpoint, and is subject to humiliating abuse by the Israeli soldiers. There were other films about the exact topic, the grinding brutality, the hopeless struggle just to stay human - "The cruelty is the point". And this was made in 2003, before the whole occupied territories turned into the big concentration camp it is today.

I promised myself that I will stop watching these traumatic films, and I will. But surprise! When the credits rolled, it appeared that this horrible true-to-life documentary was actually "Fiction"! The ugly film was so realistic, that it was a huge relief to discover it was "Only Art". 8/10.

🍿 THE INCREDIBLE THEFT OF CELINE'S BELOVED (2020), a cute French love letter to Wes Anderson. A 14 year old girl receives a surprise package in the mail. It's as if girl herself directed this story. 6/10. [*3 Female Directors*]

🍿

2 EARLY SHORTS BY RIAN JOHNSON:

🍿 I started watching his heist story 'The Brothers Bloom', but couldn't finish it. Maybe I'll do it next week. Meanwhile I tried -

In BEN BOYER AND THE PHENOMENOLOGY OF AUTOMOBILE MARKETING, the voice of Carl Jung approaches a guy taking a shit with an archetypal explanation through the air-filter vent. The topic? The subconscious meaning of car brand logos. Made for $99 in 2001. With Pink Floyd 'Atom Heart Mother' score.

🍿 In THE PSYCHOLOGY OF DREAM ANALYSIS (2003) a young woman dreams somebody else's dreams. A student film that feels like one. 2/10.

🍿

(ALL MY FILM REVIEWS - HERE).

[blogger360ncislarules]

The residents of Britain’s Yorkshire Dales are feeling the ramifications of World War II as Season 4 of All Creatures Great and Small picks up in 1940. The enchanting PBS series, based on the popular books by James Herriot, begins its new season with rural veterinarian James and his wife Helen (Nicholas Ralph and Rachel Shenton, above) a year into their marriage, wondering if the time is right to start a family, aware that any day he could be called to duty.

“In some ways, it feels like the exact reason why they should have a child,” says Shenton. “And in some ways, it’s the exact reason why they shouldn’t.”

For the actress, this new season is also the chance to show another side to her usually poised character, who moved away from the family farm after her wedding last season to take up residence at Skeldale House, where her husband lives and works.

“I think we see something different from Helen,” Shenton muses. “She’s good at being there for other people, and I think this is the first time that she’s needed a bit of help and had to say, ‘Actually, I’m not OK.’”

Like the rest of the Skeldale gang, Helen misses Tristan, who was called up to the Royal Army Veterinary Corps the previous Christmas. (His portrayer, Callum Woodhouse, doesn’t appear in this season’s seven episodes.) That leaves Tristan’s irascible brother Siegfried (Samuel West) and James overwhelmed at their practice and having to train book-smart student vet Richard Carmody (James Anthony-Rose), whose barn-side manner leaves something to be desired.

Siegfried also takes on an administrator, Miss Harbottle (Neve McIntosh), to try to get the practice in tip-top shape. She’s everything her name suggests. “What I quite like about that particular character and dynamic is that it breaks the house and unites the house,” Shenton previews.

As for the critters, a ferret with a lump, a lethargic tortoise, and a gas-passing dog all have appointments at Skeldale, where a couple of goats get Siegfried’s goat. Fortunately, for the actors they were pros. “They train the goats with food and sound,” Shenton explains. “There were these really loud horns, and then a shake of a food [container], and the goats would know to go to the next bit of their blocking.”

Another pro was a cute gray tabby named Humbug, who plays Oscar, a cat that shows up in the second half of the season and wins Helen’s heart. “He’s worked on sets since he was a very little kitten, so he’s used to being around people and he’s confident,” Shenton says. “He was super good and affectionate.”

One four-legged cast member missed some days because he needed a real veterinarian. Derek, the fluffy Pekingese furball who plays pampered pooch Tricki, had a health issue and this season split the role with a dog named Dora until he was able to return. (According to the folks at PBS, “Derek continues to be the ultimate professional and settled straight back into the business of filming.”)

In quieter moments, the friendship between Helen and housekeeper Mrs. Hall (Anna Madeley), who wants to divorce her absent husband, deepens. (Helen is still the only one at Skeldale House who addresses her by her first name, Audrey.) “That was probably one of my favorite strands,” Shenton says. “Anna and I are great friends off-camera, so it was really nice to have scenes with her.”

Madeley and Shenton also performed together on another project, a podcast drama called Gladstone Girls that Shenton wrote about pottery makers in the north of England fighting to be able to wear hair curlers to work on Fridays. The multitalented Shenton and her husband, Chris Overton, are already Academy Award winners for best live action short film, for The Silent Child in 2018.

As for the future of All Creatures, producers have yet to confirm whether there will be a fifth season but Shenton is hopeful. On a show where emotions are understated yet still deeply felt, she appreciates how truthful the series is to the time period and that part of the country.

“These are farmers. Nobody had time to be super emotional, you had to get on with it,” she says. “Often what’s nice is the things that aren’t being said. Your heart breaks sometimes because [characters] either can’t find the words or just don’t need to. They know it, you can feel it, and that’s always lovely.”

[jbaileyfansite]

Jonathan Bailey’s Interview with Esquire (2023)

What’s important to Jonathan Bailey? Punctuality. “I'm far too worried about letting people down to be late,” he explains, sitting opposite me in a suite in Heckfield Place, a grand estate in the Hampshire countryside. “Working on set and especially being an actor, sometimes you're not told if you’re late; people are too scared to. So I'm hyper, hyper vigilant. The older I get the more it feels like so much time has been wasted worrying about being late.”

The 35-year-old actor has travelled here – in good time, naturally – to host a dinner celebrating the Omega Seamaster’s 75thanniversary, his first bit of ambassadorial duty since taking on the role in April. Dining in a Georgian manor down the road from Jane Austen’s house, it's easy to make comparisons to the lodgings of one of Bailey’s most famous fictional roles: English nobleman Anthony Bridgerton (from the Netflix show Bridgerton, if you’re not part of the 82 million households that watched season one). One of his character's most prized possessions is his father's pocket watch, and Bailey shares that familial relationship with timepieces, too.

“My dad had an Omega growing up,” he says, then explaining how his “Nana” wore her mother’s watch. “From a younger perspective, I remember thinking that they were a signifier of adulthood and sophistication.” But now, the Oxfordshire-born actor uses them to help tap into different roles. “I know people talk about music that gets them into character, or fragrances or jewellery, but for me, I've played many characters who've had specific watches. When you're trying to build a character, you realise the significance of that.”

While many have come to know Bailey as the lead in the show’s second season – it’s Netflix’s most popular English-language TV series, accruing 627.11 million hours of watch time in four weeks, bumping season one to second place – Bailey's career started in childhood.

He played Gavroche in the West End production of Les Misérables at nine years old, and moved into TV in his twenties with detective drama Broadchurch, Michaela Cole’s Chewing Gum and Phoebe Waller-Bridge’s Crashing. But it was his roles on stage – an Olivier Award-winning performance in Company as well as Mike Bartlett’s Cock, to name a few – that helped him grow as an actor.

“I think you have to go back to stage to learn your craft, because you have to do it every single day,” he explains. “You learn how to tell stories in different ways, and then you take that craft and you put it on screen. But I do think that I feel more alive and connected to life having been on stage.”

This autumn, he’s returning to the TV in another love-infused period drama. Adapted from Thomas Mallon’s 2007 novel, his next project, Fellow Travelers, follows a romance between war hero Hawkins Fuller (Matt Bomer) and religious idealist Tim Laughlin (played by Bailey) from the early-Fifties Lavender Scare – a US policy that saw gay and lesbian government employees fired due to a moral panic about homosexuality – to the ‘80s AIDS crisis.

But despite a seeming predisposition for stories from a bygone year, Bailey is more interested in the universality of people's characters: “The nerd in me is obsessed with the idea of the consistency of humanity, and how people fundamentally stay the same even with the evolution of the world around them.”

Clearly, Bailey is a watch guy. But is he a dress-watch-with-a-bow-tie guy? A retro digital watch guy? Or, dare I say, a timepiece and step-counter in one, guy? It turns out he’s the type who’ll put a diving watch through its paces.

“There's something so peaceful about being submerged underwater,” he says of scuba diving, one of the many outdoor activities Bailey will do with a watch on his wrist. “And if you've got an underwater watch, like a Seamaster, all you can hear is the echo of its tick.”

Source

[leavethemtorot]

here's my hand (there's the itch)

I'm using momentum, let's do this

Warnings: Reference torture

The third time Desi heard him speak from the shadows, it was a warning.

Dealing with Cruella was always a pain. Her screeching about perfection and her hair always took so much energy. When she was coming straight from another shift to Cruella as her first client, well needless to say she needed a moment to breathe. She stepped outside, slumping against the wall. Fuck, what she would do for a drink or one of Anthony’s smokes.

Exhaustion pulled at her bones. Only eight more hours until she could sleep. Eight hours of screaming entitled adults and crying kids, with a dash of household chores to top it off. The joys of being the eldest who isn't trenched in relationship drama. Anthony picking and choosing what he can do in the name of the eldest and the one in charge of the family. He gave her no power and yet she still had to do it all, only Bella was old enough to help cut and style. Davina and Dizzy could do small stuff like wash and mix colors but no self-respecting villain trusted an eight and seven year old with their hair. 

Footsteps started down a nearby alleyway, far away enough not to be a problem, yet.

“Goblins, Maleficent’s goblins.”

Em’s voice seeped out of the shadows, low enough that only she would hear. His hand revealing itself to help her hide next to him. 

She slipped in, pressing close to avoid being seen. The goblins didn’t care who you were when it came to public torture, just that you were in their way. The tiny alcove she found herself in was tight, a small thing that he must’ve used on the rare occasion of the triplets trying to escape from the salon. But it was dry and being pressed into him was warm, helping soothe the slight shivers that raked her body. Fall and winter were never kind and she never had enough clothing for any shred of warmth.

Hearing the footsteps fade completely, she stepped out, pulling his hand with her to examine in the faint light. 

“What the fuck did you do to get your hand this mangled?”

His hand was in horrible shape, massive scabbing down the back of it leading towards his arm, half healed gashes on his palm with a slightly pussy feeling coating the entirety of it.

“You wouldn’t believe me if i said nothing would you.”

“Of course not. But keep your secret. I don’t think i want to know what happens in the Red Court.”

“For the best. My siblings entered right as you left, Davinia won’t be able to entertain them for you.”

“No, they won’t. Come in once we close, I’ll help treat it.”

“But-”

“Are you saying that you won’t be here? Because you will be. And you will come in to allow me to help and to drag you sleeping siblings home. Because they will be asleep. Do you hear me Prince E?”

“Of course Lady Tremaine.”

“Don’t call me that.”

And with that she stormed inside. Preparing herself for a shift with the Heart Triplets and one Mother Gothel on the appointment list.

[callistawolf]

My thoughts while watching Bridgerton Season 3 Part 2 -- SPOILERS!!

I took notes while watching Bridgerton earlier today so that I could refer back to them when talking to my ladies next week. And then I thought, I could just post them here (under a cut and with SPOILER WARNING aplenty) so I'm gonna.

Again, if you weren't aware... SPOILERS FOR BRIDGERTON S3 PT 2!!!!!!!!!

Episode 5

I'm confused on who's side I should be on. Eloise is right that Pen needs to tell Colin but also Eloise is the least observant best friend in the world and that ain't a great look.

Cressida's news about her parents marrying her off has Eloise kinda thrown and she's brooding and is this where we start to see her "everyone's getting married and i'm left alone" stuff? Cuz that's how you get an Eloise season you guys.

Maybe we'll see her writing letters in s4?

I also hope she's realizing her own self absorption here. Cressida's situation is no bueno.

re: Pen and Colin doing the deed - now they HAVE to get married. I've read enough historical romances to know that once they knock boots its imperative they get married in case of babies. No walking this back now! No matter how mad he gets, it's a done deal.

I totally get why she's too scared to tell him. But at the same time COME ON.

How am I feeling bad for CRESSIDA??

Wait. Is the Mondrich boy going to end up with Hyacinth instead of the Danbury grandson? There was a Look.

He's younger than her tho isn't he? Maybe he's a late bloomer?

Would solve the issue I have with Violet and Mr. Anderson though. Let's not keep everything in the family SHALL WE.

Anthony being loudly and confidently wrong during charades is giving me life. I love him. <3

This whole party is just a pressure cooker. I almost need to go out and get some air jfc.

Cressida announcing she is Whistledown is the least surprising thing ever but tell that to Pen. Oh wait, she's on the floor.

Honestly, Pen should just let her go with that. Problem solved. In the books, if I recall, she wanted credit for them? Or something...? Honestly, it's hazy now. But will that happen here?

Episode 6

This whole thing is an unmitigated mess.

I'm losing confidence tbh. Has Bridgerton jumped the shark? Am I just not as invested as I was? Or was I ever very invested at all? Oh hush just keep watching, you always doubt the process and it ends up fine.

I find I say "oh for fuck's sake" way too much while watching this.

JUST STOP WHISTLEDOWNING

She is doing the thing! Istg Pen. GAH.

I know this will work out but still

The Queen is READING Cressida and it's quite glorious.

I do like Pen contemplating who she wants to be. Her own significance. Can't she write something else though? A book maybe? Be the next Jane Austen?

I kinda feel bad for Mondrich giving up his club.

And now Cressida is READING Eloise. Lord. The mess.

I'm glad this light is being shone on Eloise at last though. Truth hurts.

Oh! Is she doing it? Giving up being Whistledown? DID SHE HEAR ME?!?

I know it's not for good, but she bets credit for trying. Bless.

Is Tilly setting up a threesome? Who is this guy? He's totally giving Benedict bedroom eyes. I don't blame him but like... who is he? Why is having dinner with them?

BRAVO to Francesca for calling out Violet and her single-vision concept of love.

Soma. Wooffffff this argument between Mr. Anderson (I keep missing his first name!) and Lady Danbury (SOMA!) is giving me every single feel. Compelling drama.

Benedict, that man is giving you the eye.

BINGO! I was right!

Oh, Ben. You coward.

Damn, apparently Mrs. Cowper can write.

Oh god, is Colin going to overhear Eloise and Pen?

Woah, Eloise is asking Pen to write as Whistledown again? Just one? Are we sure about that?

This whole convo is just so .... <3

This episode is lasting ten years.

Whistledown is en route! And writing!

Oh hell, is Colin following her? He is, isn't he??

OMG that is just like the book! It's just... a bit out of order. HAH!

Episode 7

He knows. Oh the drama!

Wait. Omg, is he crying? Is this the scene they talked about in the interview? Aww.

He'll never forgive her?? OMFG, Colin, don't be so dramatic.

Dear lord, Cressida is absolutely deriding the Bridgertons. YIKES.

Pen to the rescue!! Sorta? Eh, sure.

I still feel sorta bad for Cressida though. The girl is desperate and it's easy to see why. That old guy is not it.

I like seeing Pen and Eloise being friendly again though.

Spoke too soon. Come on, El, give her something.

The conversation between Colin and Eloise is glorious. Long time coming. God, I like Eloise again! Miracles happen!

I called the "having to marry her" cuz they slept together thing!

Okay but he's being an ass about it. Entrapment? PLEASE SIR.

Tilly demurring to Benedict about being caught kissing that dude... don't make me laugh, ma'am. You were not being discreet with Benedict being a room away with the door open. You wanted him to see.

I do enjoy this pragmatic discussion of bisexuality. I'll allow it.

Damn, Tilly is progressive as heck.

Benedict is considering it. As you should, sir. You are not married (yet).

Violet being flustered about Mr. Anderson (WHAT IS HIS NAME) is adorable.

Okay so Pen and Colin have ignored each other all week and they wait until the NIGHT BEFORE THE WEDDING to have it out?? Guysssss....

OMFG he is jealous, isn't he? I haaaaated that in the book! SIR. No.

God, Kate is perfect.

OMG did the Queen just figure out who is Lady Whistledown?

Always love a good Benedict and Eloise conversation, especially if it's on the swings.

Is Cressida doing a runner? She's escaping but to where?

Aww, Kate and Anthony are going to India and will have the baby there! Anthony is SO CUTE about it too! I love that man. I love THEM.

Blah blah wedding blah blah

Shit, it's the Queen!

Way to break up a party, Your Majesty. I mean, in the way only she can.

Francesca... honey... no. <3 That is not the secret. It's okay, boo.

Lady Danbury remaining when the Queen had said anyone not a Bridgerton had to get out is just iconic.

Colin! No! *thwaps him with a rolled up newspaper*

Get it, Benedict! (bow chicka bow wow)

Ooop. Cressida is on the scent!

Episode 8

She knows. GAH. Oh, poor Pen.

Oooh, blackmail! Very nice. Very villain of her.

This should be where the Bridgertons come together to support Pen and back her up against invaders, yes? YES??

Ooh, the metaphor of this chess game is delightful.

Whistledown will continue? So it wasn't just one issue. I knew it!

Protective Colin activate!

Wow, the threesome are still at it a day later?? Come up for air, guys. Have some food. Drink some water. Jeebus.

My boy, Colin, you are jealous of Lady Whistledown. But I love that he really gets Pen.

Portia is going through it.

Pen and Eloise! Are they friends again?? Please say yes.

Oh Cressida, that was a jerk move upping the blackmail. Now they can't give in.

omfg STILL???? They're STILL going at it like rabbits???

Oh wow, I lovelovelove the conversation between Lady Danbury and Violet! They are the best friends and that transcends relationships. And the shot of the crown! <3

I honestly have no clue anymore where they're going with Benedict. Not a one.

Colin's shirt here is so Astarion coded. It's the same shirt!!

What is happening...?!?!?!?!?!

Also.... Benedict? What? What is going on?

WHat. Who? What. HUH?

How is Eloise going to change the world?

I should never have read the books. I have too many preconceived ideas.

I'm so confused.

The money Pen gave the lady maid was for this tacky ass ball?

NGL though I love how "bugs" are actually butterflies.

Shit, it's the Queen Part 2!

Ohhhh... oh okay. So Pen told her she's Whistledown. And now.... Pen is just standing there announcing it to everyone.

Okay, I get it. The Queen being there and accepting it is basically telling everyone there they have to accept it too. Smart.

So, Pen is going to keep Whistledowning. And everyone is just going to know it's her. I mean, sure.

Okay but what about Cressida? Where is she? What happens to her?

Colin is doing some good here, telling her the things that need to be told tbh. A little late but I'll accept it.

John's cousin? Michael? No, wait... omfg it's MICHAELA. lakdjflasdj LMAOOOOOO oh shit.

I might need a little time to process that.

I maybe shouldn't have read the books part 2

Ooh an epilogue??? BABIES!!!! OMG THERES THREE BABIES.

One is Pen and Colin's! SQUEE.

LKJFSDL lmao of course they had the boy and the other two had girls.

Aww that means their baby has the title from the Featheringtons. That's sweet.

Annnnnd that's it. All she wrote. For TWO YEARS. Because lord knows they can't write the next season until the first is all released or something? I honestly don't know. GET MOVING, GUYS. Is Benedict next or what? We didn't see a Sophie anywhere. There was a brief mention of a masquerade ball that I need to go back and look for cuz I sorta missed it. Does that mean Eloise is next? Or Francesca? GAH.