#firm believer in how 95% of the problems they went through would not have been if he had just LET HER IN
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halfstayed · 9 months ago
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the vision: an entire vid that’s essentially oliver’s apology to laurel since he sure as hell never bothered to in canon
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so, before you go was there something I could’ve said to make your heart beat better?
— Lewis Capaldi, “Before You Go” / insp
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mattspinksjoyblog · 7 months ago
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The Gospel is Good News! | Thesis #2
As we are still in the beginning of these modern 95 theses that I’ve been working on, my heart is to start with only THE MOST foundational ones. What would help the church the most, what are the lynchpins to the explosion of helping us begin to see more clearly???
It is my firm belief that a thousand and one problems and sick thoughts would be resolved if we just saw the stunning incredulous goodness of Jesus' Gospel! And by that I don’t mean the half-hearted "gospel" that most people think they’ve heard, with it’s many conditions and mere measly fearful portions. We need to see again, with the eyes of a child, the gargantuan cosmic heaven-to-earth GLORIOUS Good News!!! I grew up around what I thought was the Gospel. I heard the word “gospel” tossed around in a hundred different contexts, but honestly had never chewed the feast of Jesus’ main message. I didn't even realize that Jesus himself had articulated the Message so simply at any point. If someone would’ve asked me about the Gospel, most of my life I would’ve said that it was the fact that Jesus had died for us, so if we accept Him in our hearts then we will be born again and go to heaven. Maybe I would’ve mentioned that the first four books of the New Testament are the full Gospel.
I had never heard Jesus’ simple message from Matthew 4:17, Mark 1:15. Once I did, and stared at it for a while, I realized that these simple words were what Jesus said everywhere he went, from town to town, from village to village. He didn’t really preach a bunch of sermons. He shared parables often. But, even those parables were about the simple message. Jesus’ ministry only had one focus, declare the simple Gospel, and then demonstrate it with supernatural love and power.
But, what is this simple Message? Have we missed it in most of the church?
How many of us are CONFIDENT that we have really heard Jesus’ main point?
Do a deep dive through the four Gospel letters and I’m confident that you will find the gem of all gems. Jesus’ main point to humanity: “THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN IS AT HAND!” (Matt. 4:17, Mark 1:15)
Paul the apostle brings so much further clarity by divine revelation that Jesus saying “the kingdom of heaven is at hand” means that He has “united all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth.”
Jesus announced that heaven and earth were united! Union with God is here! God and man are now one! We are no longer stuck with just our fallen earthly solutions, limited further by sin, death, and the devil. But, Paul in his epistles clarifies that we have been blessed with every spiritual blessing, we have Christ in us, and not just that but all His fullness.
Union with God is a big deal! Having all of heaven with us is MEGA GOOD NEWS!!!
Sometimes this language is still too Christianese. The words have been said in too many mundane ways. So sometimes I like to try to shock us awake to the Truth by using fresh langauge that sounds way too good… Jesus’s Gospel means that everything we thought was reserved for heaven someday is ours now!
Can you hear me now??? LOL!
Think about this though… If we are united with God in Christ, if we have every spiritual blessing, if the kingdom of heaven is at hand… what could we possibly lack??? We have intimacy with God. We have new creation hearts that love. We are fully supplied with heaven’s wealth. We have healing and wholeness.
Martin Luther said it this way, “He has redeemed me from sin, from the devil, from death, and all evil. For before I had no Lord nor King, but was captive under the power of the devil, condemned to death, enmeshed in sin and blindness.”
It is no wonder then that Luther also said, “The Gospel is nothing less than laughter and joy!”
Joy indeed, friends!!! But, in the western evangelical church, joy is almost absent from the average pew warmer. And certainly “joy unspeakable and full of Glory,” as Peter talks about in his first epistle, is foreign to most believers.
Why? Because we haven’t realized that we have THE BEST NEWS EVER!!!
We literally have heaven on earth!!! Yet, most Christians we meet don’t even know what Christ has done, and are walking around discouraged about the world’s state of affairs, wishing that things were different. And, because of this we feel stuck, and have nothing transformative to share with the world. No wonder our churches feel so often stale or condemned!
William Tyndale, the incredible Bible translator that gave his life for this Gospel in the 1500s said this:
“The Evangelion (that we call the gospel) is a Greek word and signifieth good, merry, glad and joyful tidings, that maketh a man’s heart glad, and maketh him sing, dance, and leap for joy:  as when David had killed Goliath the giant, came glad tidings unto the Jews, that their fearful and cruel enemy was slain, and they delivered out of all danger:  for gladness whereof, they sung, danced and were joyful.  In like manner is the Evangelion of God (which we call gospel, and the New Testament) joyful tidings; and as some say, a good hearing published by the apostles throughout all the world, of Christ the right David; how that he hath fought with sin, with death, and the devil, and overcome them: whereby all men that were in bondage to sin, wounded with death, overcome of the devil, are, without their own merits or deservings, loosed, justified, restored to life and saved, brought to liberty and reconciled unto the favour of God, and set at one with him again: which tidings as many as believe laud, praise and thank God; are glad, sing and dance for joy.”
Karl Barth said this, “In Jesus Christ He has chosen man from all eternity as His own, for life in His kingdom, to be a member of His people, His possession.”
Many times we just haven’t considered all the rights and privileges that are ours because we have been chosen in Jesus Christ for the kingdom of heaven on earth! I dare you to take an hour and consider… write them down… What if we had everything that we thought was only ours someday after we die!?! (There are no verses in the Bible about all the blessings of heaven being ours only AFTER we die btw.) Barth’s quote above brings up one last massive point I’d like to drive home today regarding the Gospel as well… In Jesus Christ, ALL humankind has been chosen!
The western “gospel” has for far too long been some kind of conditional transaction, rather than an unconditonal declaration! THIS IS A HUGE DEAL!
The word “news” means it something already true! You don’t usually read the newspaper to find out what could potentially happen. News is a report of what has already taken place, whether you believe it or not.
It’s time to stop preaching a potential gospel and start preaching an actual Gospel!
When Jesus said, “the kingdom of heaven is at hand,” that was just a declaration of fact, of Truth. Jesus Himself was effecting a union of all of God and all of man, of heaven and earth, regardless of whether we believe it or not. Truth is true before we believe it. Therefore, yes, we should believe it! And, Jesus does encourage us to repent and believe it. But, that’s not what gets us in! That simply how we live in reality instead of delusion.
The reality is that the kingdom of heaven has come to earth FOR EVERY SINGLE PERSON! Jesus has given all of God, His grace, His blessings, His favor, to everyone, and he’s changed us all and set us all free!
The Gospel is NOT an if/then statement. It is NOT conditional “love.” The Gospel is the most stunning announcement that in Christ God has given everyone everything we could have ever dreamed of and more!!! Now, let’s start from that foundation and see how our church life plays out…
“On it’s plain, New Testament face, (the Gospel) proclaims that all the things that religion promised but couldn’t deliver have been delivered once and for all by Jesus in his death and resurrection.” - Robert F. Capon
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unitturkey39 · 4 years ago
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The Refine Of Rekeying An Auto Door Lock.
This High Security Lock Is Almost Difficult To Choose.
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Content
Repair Work Service For Porsche 1 Switch Remote Key.
On Conclusion Of Our Auto Locksmith Training Program, Trainees Will Certainly Gain A Recognizing Of The Complying With Subjects.
Cyndrical Tube Edge Locks (Yale Locks).
Specialist Car Locksmith Covering York And Also Surrounding Locations.
The Key Locksmith.
Lockforce Locksmiths Manchester Went To An Apartment In Ancoates Manchester To Upgrade Security.
Repair Service Service For Porsche 1 Switch Remote Key.
It's natural that a passionate work team which is experts in home security would think such points, nonetheless that is no excuse for the reality. Get in touch with your great locksmith Manchester now to find out exactly how you can improve on your house security circumstance without needing to spend a ton of money. With us your renewal will go to economical prices and making use of just premium quality items to maintain you well shielded. Of course, a range of other services is additionally readily available at a dial of our number, key cutting, security checks, maintenance, repair work and also much more.
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On Completion Of Our Automobile Locksmith Training Course, Pupils Will Certainly Gain A Recognizing Of The Complying With Topics.
You can call us any time if there is anything on your mind worrying keys, locks or security. And with the effort locksmith Manchester here, you can expect the phone to be answered at any time you offer us a ring. At times the workers right here is surprised by the lack of basic security actions which can be implemented at essentially no cost in any routine household.
If you have home windows open all day, keep a check on which ones are open and for how much time. Don't leave front home windows open when you're in the yard and also only keep windows on ventilation setting over night. Follow locksmith professionals Manchesters easy support and also your security will certainly improve significantly. Improving the security of your house doesn't simply include what degree of residence security you have.
There are lots of locksmith professionals in Edinburgh, however our team believe we offer the best worth as well as solution. When you call us, you will speak to a fully educated regional Edinburgh locksmith NOT a call centre. We are additionally a neighborhood Edinburgh locksmith, so unlike huge national locksmith professionals with telephone call centres, we are able to estimate fairly exact rates ahead of time, over the phone. This ensures you you will not obtain a horrible shock when we turn up at your door.
On examination, we uncovered the gearbox had broken, and the client couldn't lock it, which presented a considerable security threat. We took dimensions and had to resource repairs for this discontinued lock. Moreover, there were great deals of problems with the frame, it was warped, however we handled to source all parts the same day and this afternoon went back to complete the task. Lockforce Locksmiths Manchester installed the brand-new multipoint locking device much to the consumers alleviation. He had actually been suffering with a temperamental lock for the previous 13 years, and also was delighted he might now lock the door without any issue.
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Does Home Depot rekey locks?
In most cases your local Home Depot can rekey new locks to match your old key. If you have Schlage or Kwikset brand locks this is an easy process. In most cases your local Home Depot can rekey new locks to match your old key.
Cylinder Rim Locks (Yale Locks).
They had been having problem securing the door just recently so I realigned the door as well as serviced the securing system while I existed. There have actually been dublin locksmiths of robberies recently where access has actually been made easily due to Thumb Turn Locks fitted on Front Doors.
How much does it cost to have a locksmith make a key?
Locksmith Key Replacement PricesServiceAverage CostCar Key Replacement$70 – $250House Key Replacement$50 – $100
A locksmith was needed for trafford park and also quick as one of the industrial services had an inner door that would not lock. Lockforce Locksmith Manchester showed up within the hr and also repaired the lock to the utility room. I attended a brand-new develop residence in Castlefield Manchester where the occupant desired her wooden entrance protecting with greater than a padlock or gliding bolt. After some discussion she chose a Perry Long toss gate lock as they come with x5 keys, can be secured from either side of the fencing and give excellent security. Lockforce Locksmiths Manchester provided and fitted eviction lock and the Tenant was very delighted with the job carried out.
These locks are fitted primarily on new construct residential properties in order to abide by Fire Regulations. I would certainly encourage that a Thumb Turn is fitted to any of the various other doors in the residential property where there is no letter box or have a letter box guard fitted to your front door. If you would like our free advice please provide Lockforce Locksmiths Middlesbrough a phone call.
Can a locksmith open a car door?
Not all locksmiths can use a jiggler to open a car door, as it requires a lot of skill to do so. They will start by using a variety of demo keys to find the key that fits your vehicle. With enough skill, they can finesse the locking mechanism and allow the key to turn, unlocking your car.
Particularly as we relocate right into cozy summer months, delegate that is accountable for closing the downstairs home windows before bed? When you leave your house do you have a routine of inspecting what windows are open? Have dublin locksmiths with your housemates or family concerning things you can all do to relieve the burden of examining your house security is tight as well as protect yourself versus break ins this summer season. Most insurance companies now not only require the existence of a mortise lock, however a 5 lever British Conventional one.
We additionally understand that some locksmith firms fit inexpensively made locks to maintain their rates reduced. A client had their bag stolen whilst on a night out which included their residence keys as well as determined their address.
Specialist Auto Locksmith Covering York And Also Surrounding Locations.
On arrival we consulted with the staff of the shop who advised the key maintains turning yet the store door wont open. A damaged cylinder was diagnosed as well as Locksmith techniques made use of to unlock.
Locksmith Manchester has seen all kinds of ways that customers have actually endangered their security for many years. As well as we are here to inform you that there are things you can do to protect yourself today. This isn't just aimed at maintaining you safe, however conserving you time and money in the future also.
I was telephoned and asked just how much Lockforce charge for a phone call out. I encouraged we do not charge for telephone call outs and also only for work accomplished. I participated in the home and also the back door had a stopped working Advocet mortis Sash lock fitted. I took care of to open the door none destructively as well as I then fitted a brand-new 5 bar British basic Sash lock with x3 keys which I passed to the Denton Resident. Today Lockforce Locksmiths Manchester were contacted us to a customer in M2, Manchester who reported a trouble with their porch door.
How much does it cost to unlock a safe?
For home lock or safe installation or rekeying, expect to pay $50 to $100 per hour. Opening a locked car runs $50 to $100, depending on travel distance. Locksmith Charges.Hourly rate$50-$100Rekey car$50-$300Make new keys$10-$150Open safe$50-$400Electronic security installation$100-$4007 more rows
The Key Locksmith.
This suggests your mortise lock has an longer bolt throw, a security curtain which protects the levers from outdoors disturbance, and an anti-drill plate. Ring at any kind of hour as well as a locksmith Manchester service who comprehends your emergency situation will certainly always fast to the rescue. Booking in for a lock study or evaluation can be done at your ease, as well as you can trust that our prices will certainly be both affordable as well as economical. Locksmith Manchester experts will constantly look after your security. And prioritise your emergency needs to you be in a difficult situation.
City Locks are reliable neighborhood locksmith professionals in Norwich, providing a complete locksmith solution to the homeowners of Norfolk as well as North Suffolk. Our emergency locksmith professionals are offered 24/7 to aid you come back into your residential property as well as for emergency lock replacements.
We'll come to you, normally within the hour, and also we complete over 95% of tasks with one browse through.
Our specialists have learned to adapt their abilities to match the work they are finishing.
If you're having problems with accessibility to your property as well as call for aid.
Snapped your key, shed your key, harmed your locks or just can not get in, then offer us a phone call.
Problems with your lock fitments can happen at any kind of point, and this is why a locksmith is offered 24/7, as your emergency situation is our emergency situation.
We have a certified, guaranteed and also educated group to complete any type of work needed, as well as, help you with any type of security troubles you might have.
We have a wide variety of solution demands from our customers, so Lockman 247 offers a variety of solutions to match.
One thing that definitely has actually not transformed at Halls is our principles.
The entire Lockman group is totally certified, they likewise lug all ID required with them if you want to see it.
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Our specialist lock engineers have also begun to advise neighborhood homeowners take a fallen leave out of the book of entrepreneur and purchase a risk-free. The most crucial point you can do when you initially move home is guarantee that you have the locks transformed.
How much does it cost to replace a car key UK?
The average price of a new car key supplied from a main dealer in the UK is £252.
After the staff were inside the Didsbury service I then fitted a new anti breeze euro cyndrical tube which worked well as well as additionally included even more security to the Didsbury Village organization. As a locksmith in Manchester I get a great deal of phone calls as a result of UPVC doors becoming progressively harder to lock as well as the door take care of often has to be required. This overtime can cause the transmission in the door to fail/break which after that leads to the door ending up being not able to lock or worse, stuck in the secured setting.
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Lockforce Locksmiths Middlesbrough were called by a lady locked in her home with her children as well as pet dog. I checked both securing systems and fitted repairs as I lug a high degree of stock leaving both doors operational and secure. A family had actually moved into a brand-new residence and also had actually only been left 1 key for each and every door that made them examine the number of keys remained in blood circulation for their residence. I upgraded all their locks to Anti Snap with 5 keys for each lock. A few of the doors would not lock and unlock correctly so I addressed the concerns to ensure they were all functioning smoothly.
It's with that in mind that it is great to transform the locks. Obviously, with a professional, handy locksmith Manchester this does not need to be a substantial cost.
Our Manchester locksmiths were contacted us to Moston this night after being called by a customer who could not lock their restroom window as the deal with had not been opening up the home window. We evaluated the window lock and took the handle off to examine even more.
This property owner in Droylsden required a reliable Manchester locksmith who chilly pick open up the lock and replace the cyndrical tube after the key went missing around Christmas time. The lock was selected open none destructively as requested to prevent any type of damages and also a brand-new anti breeze lock was provided and fitted. I was gotten in touch with by a wonderful couple who have lately bought a new house in Prestwich.
The client was extremely distressed and also worried that somebody might access their residential or commercial property, specifically as they lived alone. Lockforce Locksmiths Middlesbrough reacted to the call at 1am as well as got to the home within half an hour. I had the ability to fit brand-new anti-snap locks making the building safe as well as enabling the customer to feel risk-free in their residence.
We provide discount rate to very first time home owners to make certain the procedure runs as efficiently as feasible. Nevertheless, this can't guarantee the security of your property 100% of the time. After all, it can be difficult to stop a figured out robber and there may be various other means right into your residential property. Therefore, it is necessary to guarantee that any possible wrongdoer doesn't also consider targeting your residence in the top place.
We changed the mechanism and also applied some lube as it was getting corroded, as component of our lock maintenance. The lock was great after servicing, and also the consumer asked us to replace the handle too and was extremely satisfied with our full Manchester locksmith solution. Lockforce Locksmiths Manchester got here within 35 mins and also obtained non harmful access as well as detected a malfunctioning edge cyndrical tube. A new one was provided as well as the Manchester pupil was offered a brand-new key as well as had the ability to proceed with her unpacking. Lockforce Locksmiths Manchester were phoned call to Didsbury Town for a malfunctioning front door lock which would not open up for a commercial company.
Whether you are told you call for a sash lock or predicament does not matter, as they are both a type of mortise with only small distinctions, typically depending on looks. This sort of lock is supplied as common by your locksmith Manchester and also provides reliable home security. The 5 levers are the number which need to be turned by the key in the lock, while the British Requirement insignia additionally tells you regarding the extra security devices existing in the lock.
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Unfortunately they had shed their residence keys on the means round. I reacted in half an hour as well as acquired non harmful access to the residential property.
A household needed to finish their house action as soon as possible due to the Covid-19 outbreak. I fitted Ultion 3 Star Cylinders Police Authorized providing ultimate security for their brand-new home. I was called by a Pet dog Walker that had been for a very long walk.
Speak to the friendly, rapid and also business security specialists at locksmith Manchester now and also begin your trip. And also the regular security examinations which maintain your features in leading condition. Successive from Manchester locksmith is a really straightforward and did we point out free idea is to involve your whole residence in your regimen.
Very educated and also priding myself on the use of only the first-rate locks and fitting strategies in the locksmiths industry, call me for a locksmith service upon which you can depend. To learn more, I likewise encourage you to click on the web links listed below to access the a few of the key info about my service you're looking for. Several household clients do not become aware the value of property saved in susceptible outbuildings. This is merely to ensure that you can avoid the problems that include poor quality keys which can cause damages to your locks, specifically if utilized as regular as a number of times a day. We comprehend just how important it is to have depth and relevant understanding into your personal security circumstance, to locate the appropriate solution for you.
What do locksmith use to unlock car doors?
In this situation, locksmiths use a broken key extractor to remove the broken key or key parts from the vehicle's lock and then duplicate the key and unlock the car. Locksmiths also use a door handle clip removal tool that helps in taking out the retainer clip that locks a vehicle's door handle to the door.
Replacing a gearbox and also possibly opening a fallen short MPL will be extra pricey than an easy door readjustment so its always much better to have actually the door taken care of at the first indication of trouble when securing. City Locks offer fast and professional lock modifications in Norwich as well as the bordering areas. If you are a property manager that requires a lock modification or lock fixing, we can use quick as well as specialist emergency locksmiths anytime of the day.
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Installation work when it comes to locks should constantly be dealt with by a skilled service technician with experience. Without appropriate setup vital aspects might be neglected. Speak to a locksmith Manchester specialist on the number above now to discover more details about your lock installment now. An additional top tip we have for boosting your safety is season details. We are all taking pleasure in the warmer climate as well as longer days presently.
Thankfully, your professional locksmith Manchester has a variety of hints and also ideas which you can remember to shield your residential property. The initial layer ought to be the real security itself which locks your front door. If you have a wood front door, your locksmith Manchester will constantly advises you have a 5-lever mortise deadlock as criterion. In fact, this must ideally be integrated with a latch lock, like those produced by Yale.
This is not indicated to be a scare method, yet more a method of ensuring you enter an excellent habit for every single time you relocate home. Your neighborhood locksmith Manchester suches as to remind you that you can never be specific when the locks on your residential or commercial property were last transformed.
Involve us to find out what a good long term customer and service partnership is everything about by experiencing the superb and friendly service we provide. If it's obstructed drains that need to be unblocked after that why not call our recommended close friends by complying with the web link. If you are curious to learn exactly how this attentive locksmith Manchester can help enhance your security, or if you are merely in an urgent requirement at the here and now, guarantee that you provide us a call now. It's never ever too soon to have a look over your own situation and brush up on the components which need it.
They suggested that they needed a Manchester Locksmith as they desired a modification of lock on the front door as well as the back door was locked as well as they had no key. Lockforce Locksmith Manchester participated in the building and transformed the front door lock to a British Criterion Dual Securing Night Latch. The back entrance Mortis Sash lock was picked open as well as a brand-new 5 Bar British Stadard Sash Lock was fitted with x3 keys.
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jbuffyangel · 6 years ago
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Disloyalty: Arrow 7x20 Review (Confessions)
Is anyone feeling like the ramp up to the season finale is lacking ramp up? Cause I do. 
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Also, it’s time to talk about D*nah.
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Let’s dig in…
D*nah Dr*ke
The fact I’m starting with D*nah and not with Felicity or Olicity really says it all doesn’t it? Where should the priorities be right now given that it’s Emily Bett Rickard’s final few episodes? Hint: IT’S NOT D*NAH DR*KE.
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“Confessions” employs a well known cinematic story telling device called the “Rashomon Effect.” It’s named after a 1950 film where a murder is described in four contradictory ways by four witnesses. Cool right? Yes, it’s a wonderful way of showing how an individual’s perspective, and self interests, can warp “the truth.” One of the best films to employ this technique is called Courage Under Fire. It stars Denzel Washington, Meg Ryan and Matt Damon. Watch it. Thank me later.
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I think the Arrow writers are using the Rashomon Effect in “Confessions” but that doesn’t mean it’s effective. The episode has the same problem as “Spartan.” It’s placement in the season is bizarre.  “Confessions” would work much better if it aired in the 10-15 episode range, but as one of the final it’s kind of a snoozer. I was super bored. Bored and annoyed. That’s me.
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“Confessions” is a looooooot of exposition. Two guards have been murdered and once again Oliver Queen & Co. stands accused. My irritation begins with the Star City Police Department. At this point these ungrateful and disloyal twiddle dinks deserve everything the Ninth Circle has coming to them. My firm belief is Oliver and Felicity should dump this Emiko mess on SCPD’s lap, get the hell out of town and raise their family in peace. But they won’t do that because they are “heroes.” Their selflessness is super annoying.
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The good news is our Parkour Prince and Olicity’s first born son Roy Harper is back in town! Oh how I have missed that perfectly sculpted jaw line.  
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Source:�� arrowdaily
The big question of course is who killed the two guards? I mean… I guess I care.  
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I’m not completely heartless. It’s sad the two guards are dead, but we already know Oliver didn’t do it. Neither did Felicity or Diggle. D*nah is investigating, so I’m assuming that puts her in the clear. So that leaves Rene, Roy or Emiko.
We can boil this list down even further given how shifty Roy is acting and the fact we know he’s living on a deserted island twenty years in the future. It’s either Roy or Emiko. I’m five minutes in and I’ve already figured out 95% of the plot. Yawn.
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Every character gets their turn in the hot seat with D*nah and Sergeant Bingsley (isn’t that a great name?), who pretty much hates Oliver. 
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Source: smoakmonster 
I’m not going through every single character’s perspective on the events in question mostly because it’s pretty boring (save for Felicity). Oliver, Felicity, Diggle, Roy and Rene’s details vary but all their stories arrive at the same conclusion – they didn’t do it and Oliver’s terrorist sister probably did.
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Source: smoakmonster
This leaves us with one of two options – either Oliver & team are telling the truth about Emiko or they are covering for someone on the team i.e. Roy. Here’s where we arrive to the crux of my problem with “Confessions.” 
D*nah Dr*ke. 
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The whole story hinges on D*nah either being a disloyal jackass or the audience believing she’s a disloyal jackass. Neither option says very good things about her character.
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Oliver is sorry about the guards, but the team stopped a terrorist act so they are ahead by the numbers and boy he ain’t wrong! Yeah I know. Every life matters but also THEY STOPPED A TERRORIST. 
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D*nah and the SCPD’s evidence against Oliver is the guard’s were killed by emerald green arrows. DUN DUN DUNNNNN!!!! It’s too bad there isn’t another vigilante dressing like the Green Arrow running all over town. OH WAIT THERE IS.
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D*nah and Oliver fess up to knowing the identity of the New GA and he admits Emiko is his half sister. Oliver seems extremely reluctant to name his sister as the murderer. D*nah and Bingsley believe Oliver is protecting Emiko, so it feels legit when he quietly confesses she killed the guards. She is the reason Oliver is lying and stonewalling, so Bingsley (kind of) buys his story. Quite frankly this is a stroke of genius.  My boy was on fire with the plans tonight!
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Long story short, Roy killed the guards in a fit of bloodlust rage, but Oliver is ride or die for his boy and insists the team cover for him. 
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Source: smoakmonster 
However, Oliver’s plan is completely dependent on D*nah accusing her teammates of murder to misdirect the investigation, so he can casually/not so causally point the finger at Emiko. 
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Source: smoakmonster 
We spend much of the episode listening to D*nah say, “Why the hell didn’t you tell me?” and, “I want to believe you Oliver but you gotta admit this looks really bad,” because the arrows are green.
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Me: Holy hell woman. He went to prison for you. What more does he have to do to inspire some friggin loyalty from you?
Oliver argues pretty much all of my words because he feels me on a spiritual level. He didn’t do it. D*nah should know him better than that. And all he gets is her stony face and judgmental eyes. I mean, God forbid Oliver Queen make the department look bad!
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The reason Oliver used D*nah this way is because she’s been judgmental and disloyal all season long. She barely lifted a finger to help Felicity get Oliver out of prison, she arrested Rene for being a vigilante and was up Siren’s ass all the time. (Okay, that last one was warranted.) Her primary worry is holding on to her job as captain. And don’t even get me started on Season 6.
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Felicity: Oh you mean when Ricardo Diaz kidnapped Roy to turn him against Oliver? You might have forgotten about that since you weren’t exactly on speaking terms with Oliver and I at the time.
BOOM. Felicity Smoak is my level of petty. I love it. Drag her sis.
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At first, I thought the writers were going with Plan A – Emiko killed the guards. So, my irritation with D*nah and her constant blame game when it came to Team Arrow’s actions were at an all time high.  I’m not kidding. I want Siren back. Can we do a Canary exchange? E2 gets D*nah . At least the writers have picked a personality with this version of LL.   I’ve gone from advocating for Laurel’s death to missing her newest incarnation. This is a full circle moment.
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D*nah has many of the character problems E1 L*urel had. The writers are 100% committed to assassinating her character whenever the plot deems necessary. There’s really no other explanation for D*nah’s flip flopping personality and constant suspicions of Oliver Queen. We’ve been here before.
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I know for many outside fandom this Roy reveal was an extremely great GOTCH YA, 
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but I think fandom was on to Roy + rage = Lazarus Pit since the beginning of the season. It’s fine. We’re a very difficult group to surprise because we pay attention to all the itty bitty details a casual viewer blows right past. That wasn’t my annoyance with the episode.
My annoyance is the writers knew I would be annoyed with D*nah and believe she is selling out the team. 
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Sometimes Arrow is very self aware and this is one of those moments. They know fans are frustrated with the character and yet instead of fixing it they lean into it. 
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D*nah is blaming and accusing Oliver every other week. Her behavior really hasn’t changed that much from Season 6. So, the one time she’s on board with Oliver’s call I’m supposed to rejoice? No. 
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Sorry, particularly when the writers use her awfulness to sell the ruse. IF YOU KNOW SHE IS AWFUL THEN WHY DON’T YOU FIX IT?
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I couldn’t even be happy about D*nah being “one for all and all for one” because she continues to bitch about protecting Roy to Oliver after they are cleared by the police.
D*nah: Two innocent people died and we’re covering it up.
Oliver: D*nah is someone on this team goes down then this entire team goes down.
Felicity and Diggle also make strong arguments about sitting in lock up while Emiko wreaks havoc on the city. OTA is strongly #TeamProtectRoy.
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Source:  lucyyh
Rene: But Roy’s not a part of this team. He’s been gone for months doing who knows what.
Oliver: With due respect, you don’t know what he’s been through. Roy is and will always be as much a part of this team as the rest of us.
D*nah: Except the rest of us don’t go around killing innocent people.
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OKAY NEW KIDS. You’ve been going here for two stinking years whereas Roy has been around since Season 1. RESPECT YOUR ELDERS. 
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I understand D*nah and Rene don’t have a personal connection to Roy, but when the guy who went to prison for you vouches for him then that’s all they should need. PICK A SIDE. Are you on this team or are you out? If you’re on the team then fall in line.
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One thing I will always love about Oliver Queen is his LOYALTY. Roy sacrificed everything for Oliver, so he doesn’t even blink at two dead guards. 
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Roy was clearly out of his mind, so the Newbies need to take a beat and follow the leader. Maybe you don’t know Roy, but they should know Oliver by now. And that’s the essential problem. Do Rene and D*nah trust Oliver Queen? No. I don’t think they do. Not fully. So what the hell are they doing here?
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Also, has D*nah completely forgotten she is also a murderer? Because I haven’t.
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The difference between Roy and D*nah is she doesn’t have bloodlust as an excuse. She was of sound mind and body when she pulled the trigger, so I really need her to shove the moral condemnation.
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The entire reason this episode focused so much on D*nah is because she has been the character most predisposed to disloyalty this season. The entire reason this ruse worked on any kind of level with the audience is because we believed D*nah’s disloyalty. The entire reason Oliver knew the plan would fool the police is because D*nah’s disloyalty is believable. That is a very big problem. She is not a character I root for anymore and what’s even sadder is the writers don’t seem to care.
Roy Harper
I’m not putting my frustrations with “Confessions” all at D*nah’s feet. Now is the time to take a long and hard look at our problematic son Roy Harper. 
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Here’s how the episode should have gone:
Roy: I died, Thea dipped me in the Pit and we used the Lotus Elixir, but I still have rage issues because Mirakuru is forever screwing me over.
Oliver: Cool.
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Then, Dad would send son out into the field with a babysitter. Kind of like a buddy system. By the way, didn’t they use the only Lotus Elixir on Thea in Season 3? Me thinks yes, but apparently Nyssa has access to a whole lotus garden now.
What’s hilarious about this is Oliver used the Pit on Thea, she used the Pit on Roy and L*urel used it on Sara. And yet they adamantly refuse to use it on L*urel.  Nyssa has plenty of Lotus Elixir and Constantine is flying around time with Sara, but they still won’t resurrect her character. Oh Arrow. I see your petty and I love it. 
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(Yeah I know they aren’t resurrecting Moira, Tommy, Robert, etc. but none of those people are actively seeking employment on the show.)
Anywho, back to Roy. Oliver brought him back to town because Emiko doesn’t know who he is and he could be their ace in the hole. Also they needed someone really good are parkour.
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The writers addressed the “Why not Thea?” question, but Oliver’s answer left something to be desired. He’s not going to tell Thea about Emiko until she’s in custody? 
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Uhhh… okay. I understand Oliver not wanting to drag Thea back into the Star City drama, but he could pick up the phone and let her know what’s going on. I’m not comfortable with a lie by omission. Would Thea come running home if she knew about Emiko? Yeah, maybe but I feel confident they could cook up a Lazarus Pit emergency instead of Oliver lying to his sister. Again.
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This is 99.99% Roy’s fault and I’m glad Oliver holds him responsible for keeping a secret like this. It is possible to love and protect someone while holding them accountable. It doesn’t have to be either or.
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This is what loyalty, friendship and team work looks like. D*nah and Rene could learn a few things from Oliver Queen.
Felicity Smoak and Olicity
It’s frustrating we’re on episode 20 and I’m spending 95% of my review talking about D*nah and Roy. I have long ago accepted Arrow is never going to focus on Felicity Smoak and Olicity to the level I would like them too. I’ve let that anger die many moons ago. However, I do occasionally get frustrated and this is one of those episodes. The need to use Felicity Smoak to her max potential seems even more urgent because of Emily’s impending exit.
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And yet, Arrow remains Arrow. They won’t shift from standard operating procedure even now. Generally speaking, the big Olicity moments happen in the premiere, mid season finale/mid season premiere and season finale. I get it, but EMILY IS LEAVING. 
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It’s time to chuck the SOP. Granted they’ve focused on Felicity more than ever have before, but this kind of exposition episode and focus on secondary characters would have been an easier pill to swallow if it came earlier in the season. But 7x20?
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Maybe there’s an explanation for that and maybe there’s not. I don’t know for sure, but as a viewer it frustrates me.
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Upside: We watched Felicity eat a bunch of yummies and be her perfect, adorable self. 
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Source:  lucyyh
She almost told Roy she was preggo and Oliver had to bite his cheek to keep from laughing. 
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Source:  felicitysmoakgifs
Her feelings about Rene are the same as mine and it gives me life.
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Source:  smoakmonster 
We end on a cliffhanger with a worried wifey freaking about bae.
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Source:  olivergifs
And her hair is its own storyline. Wow.
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Source:  smoakmonster
The fact these are the only real moments I have from one of Felicity’s final episodes is sad to me, but I appreciate them nonetheless. Despite my love, Arrow is an imperfect show and it will remain so until the very end.
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Stray Thoughts
Tweet of the night.
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THEA IS HAPPY. DO NOT TOUCH MY CHILD WRITERS.
It’s entirely possible Roy goes to Lian Yu because he can’t find a cure for the bloodlust and cools his heels there for the last 20 years. Pretty much anything is better than the writers killing Thea, so if it protects my Theroy happy ending then I’ll get behind it. They are literally dumping characters in Pauseville until the series finale and I am here for it.
Do Thea and Roy both have a red hooded jacket or do they sharesies?
Look I get Rene is in love with Emiko, but she's trying to murder her brother on the regular for stuff Robert Queen did so this whole “family is important to her” stance he is taking is completely laughable. Will anyone on this show ever make sense? Oh right. Felicity AND SHE IS LEAVING.
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Oliver is making a shocking amount of sense. Fully realized superhero Oliver is so unnerving. EPIC MOMENT. Source:  olivergifs
I'm glad Emiko finally dropped the Gambit bomb. Pun intended. Oliver needs to know the evil sister has been plotting since S1 because full circle baby!!!
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Me: It's gonna take a lot more than dropping a building on him to kill Oliver Queen.
Also me: SOMEONE SAVE HIM!!!!!!!! THERE'S TOO MANY TOMMY MEMORIES AND I CAN'T HANDLE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MAKE IT STAHP!!!! Source  olicitygifs
The final five minutes were good and delivered an action packed punch, but man it was a slow ride to get there. Time to pick up the pace Arrow! We’re almost to the finish line.
Disclaimer: Any gifs on the blog are not mine. If you would like a gif removed from my reviews, please message me. 7x20 gifs credited.
If you’d like to support the blog, please buy me a cup of tea!
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martinfreemangossip · 6 years ago
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A friend just sent me the full Amanda Abbington article for those who wanted to read it (I don’t) and don’t have a subscription.
Amanda Abbington: ‘The split shook me. I had no self-esteem’
The actress talks about finding love after breaking up with Martin Freeman
Back in early 2014, when I last interviewed Amanda Abbington, she was taking a bashing on social media over her role as Dr Watson’s bride in the BBC series Sherlock. What I could not know was that she was about to go through a far worse time with the man who played him, Martin Freeman, her partner and the father of her son and daughter. Two years after that interview, they separated. Today, encased against the winter in a hat with long earflaps that conceals her newly darkened hair, she tells me about the break-up, how it destroyed her self-esteem and threatened her children’s wellbeing but also, crucially, why it didn’t dent her faith in romance.
The online abuse flung at Abbington five years ago came from Sherlock obsessives who wanted Holmes, played by Benedict Cumberbatch, and Watson to have eyes only for each other. Obviously, the trolls added nepotism to their charge sheet against her, to which her defence to me was that, after 13 years together, it was about time her association with Freeman got her a gig.
It was all nonsense — she was outstanding as Mary Watson. Her performance took an actress well enough known from ITV’s Mr Selfridge to international fame, a starring role in Netflix’s crime serial Safe and now, on stage, to the part of Anne, a wronged woman already portrayed by Gina McKee and Lia Williams in the first two parts of the French writer Florian Zeller’s acclaimed domestic trilogy. The Son, the sequence’s conclusion, centres on Anne’s clinically depressed teenage son Nicolas, laden with suppressed rage at his parents’ break-up.
Zeller described The Mother and The Father as “dark” or “tragic” farces, but reading The Son it is hard to find the laughs, although Abbington insists that the cast at the Kiln Theatre in northwest London are locating some in rehearsal. “I think it will upset a lot of people. It is melancholic and it is sad,” she says, but adds: “I like going to the theatre sometimes and feeling uncomfortable, and not because the performances are bad, but just because it’s nice to sit there and question stuff and think: ‘There but for the grace of God go I.’ ”
Except, of course, to an extent at least, she has gone there. I ask if she was reluctant to be in a play about a divorce. “No, I don’t think so, because with mine and Martin’s break-up we were kind and we made sure that [their children] Joe and Grace came first, and that their needs and their feelings were taken into account more than ours,” she says. “And, actually, we’re all right. We get on and we talk and we’re still in touch. There were flashpoints where it was very accusatory and angry, but generally we’re in an OK place and we are there for our children, which is the important thing.”
She will not go into detail about what derailed them three years ago, but there is no doubt that the 18 months during which Freeman spent up to four months at a stretch in New Zealand filming The Hobbit contributed to it. Freeman, she says, does not have a new partner, but a newspaper did report rumours of friendships that maddened Abbington at their home in Hertfordshire.
“A few things happened during the last couple of years of our relationship that were the straw that broke the camel’s back,” she says. “I thought: ‘We can��t do this anymore. We aren’t happy. It’s time to be strong and say let’s not do this because we’re just not making each other happy. We’re not making the kids happy. The best thing to do is just be happy apart.’ And, actually, I’m much happier now.
“I wasn’t depressed, but I was very low, low for months, and very tearful and it shook my confidence. I still have no self-esteem. None at all.”
Because of that? “Because of the fallout of that.”
She felt rejected? “Yes, and I felt really old and stupid and unattractive, and you can’t recover from that overnight. He hadn’t left me for anyone, but things were happening within the relationship that made me feel like that. You know, I’m getting older. I’m in my forties — all these things help make you feel less of a woman, less feminine, less female.”
She will be 45 this month, but she has always lacked confidence in her looks. “Since I was a little girl. I never, ever think I’m attractive enough or good enough to be, you know, at the party.”
She conceals these feelings from her children, especially from Grace, who is ten and, like her mother at that age, tiny. “I was bullied for being small and insignificant, but she’s like a little powerhouse, whereas my son, who is 13, is heartbreakingly sensitive.”
She regularly checks on how the pair are doing emotionally. “It was a big thing that happened to them and it shook them a lot. Martin and I get on 95 per cent of the time, but if they feel a small imbalance in our little unit they get very scared. They pick up on everything. Because they’re so young and not cynical and much more open, they sense things in people, but we’re very careful. It’s all about being careful.”
Which is the problem with the divorced parents in The Son. They haven’t been careful. “No, they haven’t.”
The husband certainly hasn’t. “No, he hasn’t, and Anne has been very vocal about her anger towards him and [his girlfriend] in front of Nicolas.”
She shared her own anger with four close friends, who were able to provide some perspective. Her parents, who live down the road from her in Potters Bar, remain hugely supportive and look after the children when she is working during the day. Freeman, who lives in north London, takes them at weekends. She has buckets of respect for single mums. Mothers remain children’s first call, she says.
Equally, while she has had to turn down four months’ work filming in Romania, Freeman would not. “From time immemorial that’s been the case. That’s fair enough. I’m the mother and I suppose that’s what people expect. It’s ingrained, but I think it’s a shame because women’s work is equally as important as men’s.”
Did she fear that she would be alone for ever? “No. No. I’m a firm believer in love. I love love. I’ve seen people get really untrusting and cynical and angry when they were hurt, and I was hurt. I was really hurt. It really shook me, but you can’t carry that on into the next part of your life.”
She noticed the Northern Irish actor Jonjo O’Neill when they performed in a gala night at the Royal Court theatre in November 2016 (I noticed the 40-year-old in BBC Two’s The Fall). On the night, she was watching him from the audience with the actresses Jessica Hynes and Lesley Sharp on either side. They said that if she did not ask him out, they would do so for her. “So at the end of the night, after the gala, I went up to him and said: ‘I think we should go for a drink.’ He was: ‘Yeah, OK.’ We were following each other on Twitter and it was really nice, but then I met him and it was like: ‘Oh, you’re lovely. I’ll be brazen.’ ”
He has met her children, but not moved in — not yet at least. If he does, he will share a home with three rescue dogs, an abandoned cat and a tarantula. He will be spared two pet rats, recently deceased. “Proper grey rats. I loved them. They used to sit up and eat cheese.”
It is almost a definition of Abbington’s low self-esteem that she fails to realise how attractive she is. I don’t think she misses how funny she is. We agree she should do more comedy.
I assume that the Sherlock trolls evaporated. “Oh yes. I don’t think they were very happy with the last series. I think it got very complicated. I love Steven Moffat [the co-creator], but I think they started to pander to the fans, involving a lot of fandom stuff. I thought: ‘You should just stick to the stories, because they’re much more interesting.’ ”
Such blasphemy does not stop her from campaigning for a part in Moffat and Mark Gatiss’s next project, Dracula. “I’d be a good vampire,” she says, modesty going to hell. She is so talented and such fun that I’d put money on her getting the job, whatever heresies she risks against Sherlock.
AMANDA ABBINGTON’S PERFECT WEEKEND
Ski holiday or beach break? Beach break
Mindfulness or mindlessness? Mindfulness. Always. Always practising mindfulness
Tiger mum or free-range parent? Free-range. I’m protective, but they need to go off and do their own stuff. I have an app on my phone called Life 360 so I always know where they are
Barry’s Bootcamp or Yin Yoga? I’ve never done yoga, but I do go to the gym a lot
I couldn’t get through the weekend without . . . A roast dinner. My grandmother taught me how to make a really good one
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minttexs · 7 years ago
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MAMA (Hoseok)
“Ahjuma”
Prologue | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Epilogue
“I love you” this is what kept flying in Hoseok’s head. He tried to keep you out of his mind how he should have but it was just impossible. These 3 short words made his heart beat so fast, how it never beated before.
The next couple of days went just compeletely blank. Although he tried to be more focused so the members would leave him alone. But they still realised there’s still something with Hoseok.
They thought if they tell you to stop he will be better again. And you did stop. You didn’t contact him. A week passed by. Then another.
But Hoseok was still in daze from that day. He kept thinking about your words. Why? Just simply why? Why now?
He thought maybe this is the way you want him to contact you. But when he didn’t he started to get confused again. And he didn’t even know how should he reply. I love you too? Maybe he would never admit, but he deep down there it was like that.
He hated that when you left. Not you, but the way you did. He was in love so much that it killed him from the inside. It was hard for him to move on, but his mom helped him a lot. He got to the point where he lost his motivation to become an idol, what he had worked for… But she always knew how to comfort him. And he could never thank his mother enough for that.
It was nearly the end of the 3rd week since you’ve texted. He had many dreams about you since then. His head was spinning again as soon as he woke up from one. He looked around and saw that his members are still sleeping.
He wanted to cool off. He needed to cool off. He took his training shoes, and some clothes and tip-toed out of the room to not wake up the 95 liners. He changed in the bathroom and left a message for Jin.
He did something which he rarely did. He went for a run.
When he was in high school he was more in shape for running too, but now… well not so much. But this didn’t discourage him. He still remembered how much it calmed him down.
He went till a park then he stopped for a bit. He felt amazing, really tired but amazing.
He listened to some music while walkin through the park. He was in his own world until someone grabbed his wrist. He jumped a little, but when he looked at his owner his expression softened.
‘Excuse me gentleman!’ the lady smiled. ‘I’m sorry to scare you, but could you help me for a second?’
‘Yes ma’am, what can i do for you?’ he gave his brightest smile to the lady. She seemed around his moms age. She was sitting in a wheelchair and wearing a cap on her head with no hair peeking from under.
‘Can you help me get my sweater? My daughter went to grab some drinks but i’m cold and i can’t reach the bag!’
‘No problem!’ Hoseok immediatly grabbed the bag and leaned down so they will be at eye level. He opened the bag and pulled out a light purple cardigan from the bag. ‘Is this ahjuma’s sweater?’
‘Oh yes, thank you!’ Hoseok helped her to get it on. ‘Thank you! Sorry to disturb you in your workout.’
‘I love to help, it’s no problem.’ he zipped back the bag, and put it next to the lady, so she will have it at easy reach.
‘Argh, really why can’t there be more young men out there like you!’ she smiled at him. ‘Nowadays kids are so reckless, and they don’t think about the others.’
‘Ahjuma don’t stress! It will cause you wrinkles.’ he looked at her sweetly. He surely made a really good impression on the lady.
‘Oh darling stressing will cause wrinkles only on my daughter!’ she sighed.
‘That’s how kids go like these days, aren’t they?’ he winked at her.
‘Your girlfriend is really lucky with you!’
‘Ah, i don’t have a girlfriend ahjuma!’
‘Oh really? You look like someone would have one.’ then she started thinking. ‘My daughter would really accept a man like you. Do you want to meet her?’
‘I’m sorry ahjuma, i would really love to, but my work life is so busy i don’t have much time for a girlfriend. And i wouldn’t want to hurt your daughter’s feelings!’ he squated in front of the lady, so she doesn’t have to look up.
‘Oh darling. I believe anything would make him happier than how she is now!’ she sighed. ‘She went through a lot because of me. She worried a lot, and lost many good relationships. Sometimes i feel really guilty, that she had to suffer so much because she had to take care of this old lady!’ she chuckled.
‘Your daughter just loves you very much. I would drop everything for my mom too. I think every kid would.’
‘I know. I just wish it could have turned out differently.’ they heard a loud ‘eomma’ from the distance and Hoseok stood up.
‘I don’t want to disturbe your time with your daughter, ahjuma. It was nice meeting you and don’t catch a cold!’ he winked at her again. The lady felt the love ouzing out from Hoseok’s body.
‘Thank you for your help again!’
‘Eomma i brought us some orange juice!’ they heard the girl talking. The voice seemed very familliar. ‘The doctor said you have to eat fruits to gain energy. So i also brought some snacks… too…’ the girls voice froze as soon as she saw Hoseok.
They both were in shock.
‘Y/N?’ Hoseok broke the silence.
‘Oh you guys know each other?’ the lady lit up. ‘Your lovely friend helped me just before to get my sweater. He’s so adorable Y/N!’ then he got to her head. ‘I don’t even know his name. Maybe could you introduce us to each other.’
‘Seok…’ you started but then you stopped and started again. ‘Hoseok, this is my mom Eunhae, as i see you’ve met her.’ then you looked at your mom. ‘Eomma, this is Hoseok, my old high school friend from Gwanju.’
‘Oh you’re that Hoseok?’ her face was so surprised but also excited. ‘It’s so nice meeting you. She talked about you a lot. When i used to work she couldn’t shut up about you.’
‘Eomma…’ you felt redness appearing on your cheeks.
‘She told me you’re an idol now. But that you still have your passion for dancing!’ how your mom kept rambling Hoseok found it so adorable that it reminded him of you. You also did the same when you were excited.
He shyly scratched the back of his neck. ‘I’m not that big of a deal actually!’
‘Well you must be, if you caught her attention!’ she pointed at you. You were as red as tomato.
‘Eomma!’ you said it louder. She finally understood it, and bowed. He looked at your face, and had a hard time holding back his smile. You were always so cute when you were blushing. He tried everything to make you blush just so he can see it often.
You looked at your watch. ‘Eomma we should be heading back!’ you told her, and her face changed from really happy to really sad.
‘Can’t we stay out a little longer?’ she looked up to you like a little puppy.
‘I wish we could, but you know how we got into trouble last time too.’
‘Fine’ she sighed. ‘Goodbye Hoseok! It was really nice finally meeting you!’
‘It was really nice meeting you too, ahjuma.Y/N told me a lot about you as well.’ expect this tiny fact that kept bothered him. Does you mother has anything to do with your leaving?
‘I hope only bad things.’ she winked at him.
‘Like i could tell any good about you Eomma!’ you smiled at her. You quickly packed anything and grabbed her wheelchair.
‘Bye-bye!’ she waved to him, and he waved back.
‘Bye…’ you whispered to him, as you passed him.
‘Goodbye…’ he whispered too.
You took back your mom to the health center, and promised to come back tomorrow. As you did, every single day.
Hoseok waited you outside the center. Trying his best to hide from the eyes. He couldn’t help but follow you. Obviously from a far distance but he wanted to make sure both you got back safely.
As he waited, he replayed every moment just from a few minutes ago. His mom was right. She has grown. She became a woman from the rebellious teen he remembered. He realised your hair has grown too. It was only shoulder lenght when he last so you, but now its grown till the middle of your back.
He was disturbed by your shadow, that covered the sun from him. He was so surprised he jumped up from the bench he was sitting.
‘Awh, you scared me!’ he got to his heart. ‘Hi!’ he tried to put up his most believable smile.
‘Does that count harassment too, if you follow me?’ you raised a brow.
‘I’m sorry about my members. They can take things a little far, they didn’t mean to offend you.’ he scratched the back of his neck.
‘Nevermind!’ you shook your head. ‘I should get going.’ you stepped away from him, and turned around to go on your business, when you felt a firm hold on your wrist.
‘Your mom…’ you turned to him. ‘Is she alright?’
You gulped so loud you felt he might have heard it. ‘The doctors say, she’s okay now… She’s just a bit weak from the treatments.’
‘I see…’ he nodded. You were so thankful for his worrying but also you could not focus on anything else but his hold on your wrist. His hand was so warm, and soft. You thought he will let you go, but he still didn’t.
‘What happened to her? When did this happened to her?’ he asked. You knew why he did… at least you hoped for the same reason.
When he saw your expression, he sat down on the bench pulling you with himself. He didn’t let go of your wrist which you were so thankful about.
You took a deep breath and told him, everything. From the begining when you got a call from your dad, who told you mom had an accident on the business trip she went on. The doctors diagnosed her with cancer from the factory’s fumes and the chemicals. Her condition was so bad, that they had to keep in that country for several years. You had to hold back your tears, when you told him about the near death experiences she had to suffer through. But she successfully recovered, and the doctors let her to come back to a care center here, until she recovers totally. And Hoseok just sat there, listening to you, and holding your wrist fearing if he let go you would disappear and he would wake up from this dream.
When his members started to call him, he decided to walk you home.
‘This is why you left…?’ he finally asked the question that has been killing him for years now.
You could only nod. But the silence that appeared really annoyed you.
‘I wanted to call… But everything was so fast… and when i realised this is the moment… i was just too coward to do it.’ you shrugged. ‘I must have broke your heart real bad. Which i’m really sorry and feel guilty about.’
‘You shouldn’t.’ he smiled. You frowned. ‘Only heartbroken composers can write good songs, aren’t they?’ you laughed, which he was really happy about.
‘I want my share from your fame, what i caused.’ you told still smiling widely.
At some point you had to part, because he had to go, and you sadly went to the other way.
‘Well it was nice seeing you.’ you looked at him from head to toe. ‘Wow, you really became a man. I can understand the fans go crazy about you.’
‘Yeah it was nice too!’ he smiled. He felt the same about you. You just looked so stunning he could only imagine boys running after you all the time. ‘It’s been long.’
‘Told ya’!’ you winked at him, which made his hear beat even faster. ‘I don’t wanna keep you up, soo… Bye Seokie!’ you immediately regretted calling him like that. It just reminded you the times when you two were dating.
‘Bye…’ but he didn’t care at all. He actually felt really happy when you called him like that. ‘Sunshine!’
When you parted, he ran back to the dorm. He was so happy, words can’t even describe it. He leaned his head to the front door, and smiled widely.
‘What’s with that face?’ Namjoon asked, as he passed by.
‘I just had the best run ever!’ he answered and went to the bathroom to have a shower. Still smiling like an idiot.
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ts-akhmim · 4 years ago
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Episode 7 “It's a Hot Mess Express “ - Scott
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People are so hard to work with. I get they don't like this challenge truly I do but I just wish they wouldn't keep shutting down every idea I had. It's... annoying. I get that I'm also the problem here. Because if an entire room full of people is saying you're wrong then you're probably wrong but still. I dislike being shut down. I've just been feeling kind of isolated since my name was written down. Even in my own alliance it seems like everyone thinks less of me for being paranoid. It doesn't help that I'm not entirely pop culture savvy so a lot of their convos I'm a bit out of the loop on. Part of me wonders if it's cause I'm in a male dominated environment? I don't think they are sexist but I do think that I'm being unintentionally ignored. Like throughout the duration of this confessional I have submitted 6 ideas/comments to the group and they've either been left in the dust or dismissed. That has to mean something right? Is it my personality? Did I come on too strong with my enthusiasm? Do they think I'm bossy? Socializing doesn't exactly come naturally to me. If anyone had met me 4 years ago you'd probably be in the know. You know that ability where you can pick up what people imply, whether through body language or through hidden meanings. I don't. I literally was born with out that ability and it has done whatever the opposite of wonders are for my life. At first I thought it was fine, I thought hey no big, everything is good, people like me eventually. But then I played Malaysia... A lot of great things came out of that game, a lot of good friendships and memories but in a way it sort of haunts me. When the confessionals came out, for the first time ever I saw what people thought about me. Sure they liked me eventually but they also disliked me. Like really really didn't like me at all. It was my first real interaction with people outside of the treatment school I went to, it was my first real interaction with the rest of the world and people hated my guts. Don't get me wrong I always suspected I was disliked but... to see their actual written thoughts on paper was hard. Of course as they got to know me they started to like me but I couldn't forget that it wasn't always like that. That at one point they looked at me or their screen or whatever and saw a pest. And that's my biggest fear, that I'm the problem. That no matter where I go people see me and are filled with dread or disgust. That people are always wishing me some from of ill because I'm bad at conversation or sort of creepy. Well at least they came to their own conclusions now, maybe they pulled their heads out of their asses or because it wasn't me they were actually able to function. God this spiraled, I only wanted to complain about how shitty my tribe was being not go on this full blown existential rant. Fuck me am I right? I'm not sure what this is going to contribute to the game. There is no hashtag big moves or fun comments but like I already typed this up so I'm not going to delete it like a pussy. 
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Ok now we can talk whew. UMMMM not Connor fucking up Duncan's perfect record! Now that I'm over the shock, thank you Connor because I'm 95% sure that obsession is the reason Duncan did the most to make sure Devon voted me instead of him back on Thoth https://giphy.com/gifs/mamovie-stalking-octavia-spencer-eavesdropping-j5uEVYERR0ncYlJ36e Really pleased with how the game is shaping up tbh, assuming I don't lose another music video challenge hahaha. I would LOVE a final 3 with me, Ali, and Devon but I know that's a long way off so I'm just focusing on the here and now. My biggest concern is protecting Ali. Essentially Duncan hit me up to work with him, TJ, and Jordan and I was very much like lol not sure about that. Mainly because Jordan and I don't have a strong relationship? And Duncan was like yeah but he wants to get to know you better and I'm like https://giphy.com/gifs/week-wtf-moments-QjIz1AqkGTszK If that's the case, that needs to come from Jordan and then it's between me and Jordan. Why someone else is interceding on Jordan's behalf is very dicey to me but I'm not that surprised because that continues to be a theme with Duncan: getting me to fit into plans that best suit him. Y'all know DAMN well Jordan Pines don't wanna go to the end with me and the feeling is mutual. But I HAVE to make it work with Jordan or Duncan will get pissy. He literally was like ok well who are you close with and I felt a serious feeling in my gut to not mention Ali. So I said oh I talk to Adam a lot but I wouldn't say I trust Adam. So after telling Ali all of this lmao, we decided I needed to go back to Duncan and say yes because it would keep me in the know and keep both of us safe. Also it allows me to keep an eye on Jordan and Duncan at the same time so we truly stan. And the gag is I'm not scared of Jordan Pines and I welcome the challenge of getting him out so love yall for letting me in through the front door hahaha My new issue is just timing. We'll be ok if we win this next challenge but if not, I could see that alliance targeting Ali. Obviously I have a plan and will put the vote on someone else but I really want to prolong turning on that group for as long as I can. I don't wanna spook TJ and I know killing Jordan will leave me with a pissed Duncan and I really don't need that based on how seriously he's playing. So I'm hoping I can finesse somehow? Maybe one of them gets idoled out at merge and then a blindside on the other won't be as messy. But yeah I keep feeling like the walls are closing in, in terms of allies, and I'm working HARD to make sure I have an exit strategy at all times haha cause fuck these men I'm trying to win again. I "love everyone" which means I have no problem voting out anyone
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So let me just make sure i got this right, connor tried to get people to vote for me, they all told me, he "planned" with me to go for liam, then....he votes for duncan and he goes home unanimously? little did he realize when he went around and gave a feeble attempt at rallying people to vote for me, i had already rallied everyone to go for him and made sure everyone knew he was a liar and couldnt be trusted, you know im a firm believer in loose lips sink ships and i absolutely used my big mouth as my weapon to sink his ship. Even if there turns out to be some majority alliance that did this all without me then well...i guess that's another story but im still taking my hard earned credit because either way i got what i wanted one way or another so im here for it, sorry gal! i now find myself in a position i hope i can make some moves with, duncan already just made a vague to comment to me about how "it only takes 4 now" which he's right, and he mentioned autumn, himself, me, and ali. Which, that's a 4 I would love to go forward with for the time being, i like to think ive had good genuine talks with them 3 in particular, and now we can start get together maybe lock something in and if we make it to a merge or even another swap we at least have something to work with with each other, but we'll see, we gotta focus on immunity first now, id love to win just to for sure see any of the other people who lied to me go home oop so while i may be feeling ok now i just have to remember to simmer down and play smart and make the right connections with the right people i need and saying the right things to whomever needs to hear it, because that's what i do best in these type of games to stay alive, i feel like my intuition has been leading me ok so far this game so im just gonna keep basing my decisions off that and charging forward PERIOD and ill damn sure do it with or without the help of the tomb because a bitch can not get in ive tried over and OVER at this point im back to pounding on the door of it just hoping if im annoying enough yall will let me in!
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i'll do a proper game confessional later but me and dan are both judges for the svalbard music video challenge and its so sad that we cant talk... its like... this could be us working on a music video if things were different kjlsdfa its missing dan and jake hours
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Whew! Sorry about that what happened was I ran out of anxiety meds a few days and that rant was the commutation of being with out sanity pills for three days! Everything is fine! I am fine! People are fine! I am sorry to the future Thoth 2.0 tribe, you are all great, I just get very spirally when I am without some sort of stabilizing force! Sorry to the hosts for using this as a diary this is not a diary this is survivor... Anyway this time I have some more constructive things to add! Okay so things are fine. Dan and I continue to bond, though he had to call me out on being bad at communication in order for our relationship to progress. I get it was like a check point or whatever and frankly I appreciated it. Like I said in my rant yesterday I have massive paranoia when comes to interacting with people and whether they like me or not, so constructive feedback while annoying is always helpful. Plus through research I found that he values a good social game so the fact that he's reaching out and telling me what I'm doing wrong is probably a sign that I'm not a lost cause :D. It turns out we have a few mutual friends our lord and savior John Coffey and also Sarah,... Lynn to be specific there are like a shit ton of Sara(h)s so should probably clarify lol. I want to work with him. I know he's in the majority alliance with the brawn tribe, which also contains Jakey and Jordan. Considering the fact that the beauties are slowly but surely getting eliminated, their favor would be helpful to me and mine. However, I know for sure that one of them wrote my name down. Honestly probably both of them. I know I keep harping on this fact but I just really really don't like the idea of looking like an idiot by aligning with someone who wanted me dead or wanted to fuck with me. If we do lose this challenge we are going to have to figure out who to keep or who to eliminate, I feel like it should be between those two. Mostly because I'm not exactly comfortable with a brawn majority. Like I know how people are saying tribe lines don't matter and while they don't, advantages do. And what more advantageous than being in a majority alliance? If we get rid of a brawn that would make it 4 brains- 4 beauty - 5 brawn. Which seems a bit more fair lol. Also RIP Connor remember how I said he was a threat? Welp I guess this is why they don't ask me for cast assessments :/ and also cause I was dead for like several years.
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absolutely nothing has happened in fact i was kinda in a ~mood~ today so i feel like my social game took a big L because i didnt feel like talking to anyone and i was busy so i kept being that bitch to responding once an hour ..... but in other news i finally accessed the tomb, and once i started using more than one brain cell at a time i was able to get in and it was actually about 10x easier than i was making it out to be im not sure WHY i was struggling so much but of course, to no surprise i finally get in and the pedestal is empty AGAIN. Now there's not only at least 1 idol from the last time i went in the tomb gone, but there's possibly a second too, if not an advantage that can easily be played against me. At this point all i can do is try and recover a little bit, tomorrow ill have to just try more with my conversations and hopefully one of the people i can somewhat trust is the person who has whatever was in their time time around but probably not, it's never that easy
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okay so i have a video confessional from earlier uploading which is kind of a recap of the last two rounds BUTTT!! liam just finished editing our video and i love it!! he did so good and our tribe all tried our best... im just hoping the other tribe didn't go bananas all out, because if they didn't we should hopefully win... i really wanna win immunity because otherwise i feel like adam is gonna be the vote and i dont want that anymore KJASDFA. i would just be sad because idk who the alternative would even be.... so basically we better win immunity KJLSADFA
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Me: Alright everyone, make sure you film horizontally!!! Devon: Fuck you
Honestly!!! I take back what i said about Kendall. I feel like we’re making some strides to work together??? Or she’s playing me? I’m hoping to stir a Devon vote this round because I think he threw the vote on Kendall to piss me off, but who knows. I wanna talk to Jakey and see what he thinks about a me/him/augusto/Amir alliance to get through this vote? Idk I trust him but who knows!!!! Maybe everyone is lying to me??? 
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okay... i know i said god is a woman and her name is autumn but its time for the remix. god is a woman and her name is alyssa's mum because alyssa's mum just rescued us from defeat in that challenge JKASDF the judges were kinda unnecessarily harsh but we move on. basically for the other tribe's tribal, i hope jake/dan/devon live... hopefully another scary old school person goes but tbh who knows what is going to happen?! im just so happy to have made f13, i said i'd come 14th in my intro so we love surpassing my own expectations
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the immunity challenge went well, we won, which is good because i just didnt feel like going to tribal council because im honestly unsure what the hell is going on, i wanted to feel good about the connor vote because obviously that was my plan from the start however he just made it a little too easy by not talking to a lot of people allegedly, up until right before the vote, i dont think there'd be an easy vote next time we go to tribal, unless ... it's me... am i the easy vote?? i wanna really think im not but its just always too quiet to me when we dont go to tribal there's also lots of talk and speculation about a possible merge at 13, but me and my vivid imagination aka paranoia think maybe another swap of some sort could still happen even if for just another round or 2, i never knew with you sneaky hosts!! also i know we won in the challenge but we wouldve won in the challenge by even more if liam used more footage of my video i sent in i feel like i got no screentime!!! but of course i kept my big mouth shut for once because there's no i in team so ill try not to throw too much of a diva fit but listen... i tried to give yall a DEATH DROP, and i pulled a wig ruveal by snatching off my hat, and i was giving you a whole tik tok dance i made myself..... but there was no way i was doing more than beyonce's part so he didnt have much to work with so touche .... the full version i made will just be deleted scenes for myself ill reflect on when im more mature and think to myself "what the fuck was i doing?" 
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So not to my surprise, we end up losing the challenge AGAIN!! I've just accepted that I really don't have any luck in this game. I was really hoping that we'd just win every challenge until the merge because I'm over going to tribal and voting people out. I feel like going to the amount of tribal councils that I have has left a huge target on my back. But at the same time, I'm playing the game more than other are. Maybe I have that going for me, who knows. Anyways, the Thots alliance is deciding on either Devon or Dan for this vote. I basically told them I was good with either, even though I would perfer to keep Devon so that I at least have more of an opportunity to rebuild our relationship. I've made it very clear that if the group as a whole wanted to do Devon that I'd write his name down to prove that I trust this group moving forward. So we decide to go with Dan for this vote, and this doesn't really sit well with Jakey. I'm not surprised by that, since I know he's wanted Kendall out for awhile now. But he is really adamant that he doesn't want Dan to go. Which I get, he thinks that Dan would trust him moving forward. When it comes to Dan though, his social game lacks so much that it's like "I don't even know if I can trust him moving forward". And I think the fact that Jakey more so wants to target Kendall this round instead of Dan is a strong sign for me. I'm pretty positive he has an idol since the brain one has been found and he's lied to me about clues before. So this has me thinking, maybe it's a good time to get Jakey out this round? Thinking about it numbers wise for the future, we don't really need Jakey's vote for a majority this round since the four beauties and myself makes 4, and if we bring in Devon that's 5. Plus, I don't even think that Jakey's under the impression that he would... get voted out this round. He seems offly confident that he's staying, just that Dan's going. But I like to think he'd let Dan be a sinking ship and go.. Idk I'm gonna try to pitch this to Amir and see what he thinks. I kind of tried to hint around it to Augusto that Jakey wasn't cool with it, but Augusto kind of turned a blind eye at that. And I don't trust Kendall with my thoughts since she's very blunt... so I wouldn't be surprised if she leaked my plans. Similarly to what Devon did when I voted him out last week. I'm hoping that Amir will see where I'm coming from and that he might be open to that concept. For all I know, I could be voted out this round. And honestly, that'd be the smart move for them to make because my perception in the game so far has been pretty spot on. I think my self awareness this time around has been an asset for me, so I'm hoping that I can get by this vote and hopefully enter the merge soon. 
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Coming back into the game, I knew I needed to open up a bit and start to Slither earlier than I would imagine. After throwing a vote onto Kendall, I broke down any chance between the Beauty and Brawn working together to knock out myself and Scott. I haven't told anyone about my vote, and don't plan to. Going into this vote, Dan should be the obvious choice. OG Brawn hasn't suffered any additional losses in numbers, and I'm just too close with Augusto/Amir/Kendall to consider flipping. In preparation of tonight NOT being a swap, I established an alliance with Amir and Augusto. They are a duo in every sense, but attaching myself to them sets up the opportunity to at least CONSIDER voting out Scott next round. It would have to be between him and Scott. 
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All I got to say is oof… I genuinely thought I was on vacation after the last round like I’ve been SO bad about talking to people or at least that’s how I felt cause I was operating at 60% instead of the 110% I do when I socialize. That being said, I have my goals that I want to stick to and see happen. Dan needs to leave this tribal so I can get Jakey out next even if Dan leaving makes me really sad. Dan leaving takes a number away from the Brawn and a number away from Jakey, who I am able to get out by keeping Devon and having him/Kendall/myself/Amir vote for him if we happen to lose again. The alliance of me/Kendall/Amir/Jakey/Scott went on call last night and it was deadass an hour and a half long call where everyone was like “idk who should go but I’m fine with whatever” although… that certainly wasn’t the case. I, personally, made points that were pro-Devon such as Devon not having any clear allies to reunite with at merge and things like that and EVENTUALLY at the last 5 minutes of the call, we decided that Dan leaving is the better option. Scott and I even discussed a Brawn having to go before we even did the call so yeah. One thing I could tell though? Jakey was not having it. I understand his frustration but you can’t have your cake and eat it too. I voted out AJ to prove that I am not here to play by tribal lines and you said you would do the same but here we are… Amir called me last night telling me about how Jakey was trying to strong arm him into voting Devon out because Jakey didn’t want to do Dan… like sir, I’m? I’m very happy that Amir came to me and confided in me to kinda spill out his emotions like that makes me <3 but it also made me wanna pop off at Jakey because I don’t like those approaches in games hgfjdks even if I do really like Jakey, I was just ugh gjfdks. That aside, I feel like I am doing good about getting information and building friendships out here like I’m DEADASS is almost every single alliance on the tribes I’ve been a part of and while I don’t get tons of info from direct sources (ie. Jakey), I get the information from close allies (ie. Amir) which in a way can be even better? That being said, I’ve been way too good at forming friendships that every vote makes me feel really bad? With Dan for example, I adore that man like even if he isn’t the most talkative he’s just amazing. But does Dan benefit my game as much as Devon? Not really, even if Dan wanted to align. I’m sticking to my promise of doing what I have to do and be a little bit more cutthroat than I usually am because I do genuinely want to win this game and I’ll do what it takes to get there. Honestly, I’d be SHOOK if we do not merge next round or the round after ghfjdksm but I’m just trying to plan ahead and look at my connections. My Thoth connections are Amir > Kendall > Devon > Scott > Jakey whereas my Hathor connections are Autumn > Duncan > Adam (?) > TJ > Jordan > Liam M > Ali. If we do merge, making a secret thing with Autumn would be KEY just to have another person in my corner but also I need to connect with a Brawn to be good with them yknow? It’ll definitely be interesting and I can see the merge being messier than a taco bell bathroom BUT I’m hyped at the same time?
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How is it already Day 16? There seems to be something seriously wrong with that. Anywho, I've let myself take a quick step back on the social game these last few days. I think I've put in the work to cement a couple strong groups here and can put myself in a good spot, but now I can avoid being the person that probably would be seen as a huge threat in the near future. Once merge hits (which I'm hoping is this next round), I'm going to have to go back to bringing that social game to a 9 (10 is where the Alyssa threat level begins), but right now I'm hopefully putting myself in a good place. In the event we don't have a merge and have one more vote on Hathor, I really think I need to make a move on Ali. I realize I keep saying this and I'm going to feel awful when he sees this all, but he is such a HUGE threat, and I can't let him skate by to where there's no room to stop him. I made that mistake last time in letting the person I knew would win get too far without me being able to stop them. Not this time. Ain't no fucking way.
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This may very well be my last confessional lmao. I’m just feeling very paranoid about this vote and honestly I wouldn’t be surprised if everyone votes for me except for Jakey. Or if he even flips to the majority against me. And honestly! I’ve come to terms with it. I really tried my best in the game and I can’t be mad about how I performed in this game specifically. I understand I’m a threat in these games and if people are worried about me end game, quite frankly they should be. I know that I’ve played Tumblr Survivor one too many times and should have quit while I was ahead. I know I’ve talked about working with Kendall and killing Devon, but honestly idk who is voting where. I think I’m going to try to just go with what I think is majority (against Kendall) and just hope to god I’m not going anywhere. I hate having this defeatist attitude, but if I get voted out I’m going to have zero hard feelings and take it in stride. I guess I’m just not cut out to win tumblr survivor ❤️
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Our video was so iconic, SHOUT OUT TO ALYSSA'S MOM!!! I should really be making sure im fortifying the bonds i've made but im really just happy to be on break and not have tribal. I've only been to tribal once within a 7 day time span instead of the 4 times in 7 days the brains endured before. I will say i was positively shook to get the vote from connor, but i never thought i could play a perfect game anyways lol. I'm hoping to god that dan or jakey go, i dont want the brawns over here to have other options than autumn and i come merge. Im surprised at myself because im starting to really want to stick with all these people come a merge, i suppose we'll see how it goes and how my attitude changes moving forward. 
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Sooooooo I actually felt kind of bad about voting for Dan until he was throwing my name out :/ I guess you can't teach an old dog new tricks. I'm kind of nervous now. Like Jakey told me this and he did the same thing to AJ. Also I haven't heard anything from Scott yet... that's sketchy right? Ugh I swear if I'm voted out then Alyssa's mom, I will meet you in the Denny's Parking lot for a fight. I'm not afraid to throw hands at the elderly, ask Drew. 
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We love when men listen to me an in turn we win immunity! This is now the second time that's happened lmao cause I sure did make everyone commit to a time block so we didn't play ourselves in the endurance challenge and I sure did suggest Telephone as the song choice so wooooo Not a lot has happened and I don't have a lot of time to talk to begin with but I have a strong feeling we are not merging tonight lmao. Tbh I look forward to another day on Hathor it's very chill over here, all things considered. Also I need a couple chill challenges the next two rounds cause ya girl is moving, graduating, and leading an underground movement all at the same time so don't set me up with a crazy time-consuming challenge lol
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I feel vindicated. Starting off in this game, I was not doing so well gameplay wise. Flash forward, I've been a big contributor physically, and socially too! I've got big plans, and I will carry this tribe again if I have to!
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(may've already submitted this but i'm worried i submitted it for day 18?)
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Also...
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ok let me just start by saying: im in an emotionally FRAGILE state at the moment writing this right after the winners at war finale.....SPOILERS IF YOU HAVENT SEEN BUT I HAVE TO SAY IT....NATALIE AND WINCHELE ROBBED, as inspired as i am by my aries sistren natalie and think she should've won, im even more upset for my fellow beauty sister michele because lowkey? i absolutely LOVE the way michele plays, because in my own head at least i like to think i at least play slightly similar, i like to lay low and just adapt to where i see i can fit the best, anywho thats all ill say on that, back to THIS game dan being voted out last round, was kinda meh, i had the tiniest conversation with him during one world and he did end up giving me some tea about the brawns, but i couldve easily tried working with him later on against the beauties, PLUS him leaving means that none of those false beauties left, which is bad for me because i want them all gone oop and ive worked hard over here trying to make sure everyone knows they are threats even if theyre not working together, they went against me and lied to me, which means i cant trust them or work with them, which means i need to make sure no one else does either it's very nice though duncan has approached me and asked who i was comfortable with incase we did go to tribal and he said him and jordan pines were pretty close and honestly jordan is the only one ive been on a call with this whole game which is fine because anyone who knows me knows i dont care for calls much in this game and that usually hurts me so im hoping its not hurting me this time but truly, im not sure people are approaching me way more with information and plans then they ever have so im hoping thats a good sign, espcially with duncan saying he basically wanted me to be in the know with him, i think i can trust him as of now going foward and i hope the same about jordan pines, because first of all i love his energy and him as a person my fellow stoner crackhead, and second of all let's be real i definitely want to use him as a shield later on cmon the guy has a season named after him, forget denise being the queen slayer, i want to be the king tamer also in good with ali and autumn i think?? i personally enjoy my short little convos i have with them frequently so i just hope we're on the same page, but idk the little voice in the back of my head is telling me it all seems too good to be true almost like a perfect illusion and maybe duncan is tricking me trying to talk to me about "keeping this tribe strong", so i guess we'll have to wait until the next time we go to a tribal together to find out so yeah in conclusion, sorry to dan, and plot twist of the century im rooting for jakey to not be voted out the other tribe? even though im still convinced he could be making me his number 1 target especially if he gets in kahoots with kendall, but im hoping i played them against each other enough during the one world so that didnt happen 
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What do ya know....another tribal council. After only being exempt from one tribal, this has become somewhat of a routine. I am extremely confident in the numbers this round. I'm under the belief that everyone will be writing down Jake's name, and Jake will likely be writing down my/Kendall's name. Still, I believe there is a worry about idols. I would hate to be idoled out by Jake after everything I have worked towards...I can't afford to throw my vote on Kendall or Scott with the merge coming up so soon, because it fractures my game going into a potential merge...Somewhat of a "all or nothing" bet tonight.
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Me @ the brawns who have been on this tribe: https://media.giphy.com/media/szPZ2NXIGCMcE/giphy.gif
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So a couple new developments: 1. Jordan offered me a final two which I'm sooooo excited to see how that's going to turn out. I've really connected with Jordan this game (which admittedly I didn't think would happen before this game), but he's been the person I've confided in the most out here. So I really think this is going to be the start of something amazing. 2. With this F2 deal, Jordan told me that Amir/Jakey knew each other outside of this game. This is bad for me both because Jakey is supposed to be my other guy with Jordan, but also Amir is the person I'd want to target come merge (which should be next round). I have zero connection to him, he's proven to be good at comps, he's won this game before, and he doesn't add into my plan of having numbers on every side. So now I'm in a spot where I think I'll probably have to make a move against potentially my closest / other closest ally in this game. Being safe right before the potential merge feels amazing and opens a lot of opportunities, but is extremely scary knowing who is going to merge. Hopefully come to merge, I have a chance at the merge idol to avoid anyone else having the chance at getting it, because I need some added knowledge in this game.
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I am so fucking pissed at Devon. WHY ARE YOU ON THE BRAINS IF YOU HAVE NO BRAIN CELLS!!!!!!! dsfjkaafkjdaldjfjadksjads Great now I get to die!
I don't know why Jakey wants to kill me. I am not a threat. Like at all? Most of the strategies I come up with are bad and I am barely social? Sure I guess I can win like a challenge or two but not enough to be physical? I mean I'm trying to kill him but like... honestly he started it 2 rounds ago. I am a paper tiger worse I am a paper giraffe. Sure I'm tall but basically harmless and only sort of evil. At least I remember why I hated him so much. I don't hate him NOW, I'm 22 years old I have better things to do then hate some guy for trying to win a game. But I am annoyed and inconvenienced by this. Maybe a little hurt too because the only reason I can think to get voted out is because my personality sucks so much that he doesn't see a future where we can work together. Which is fair I guess? But I can't be that awful right? God this game is a constant existential crisis... Also I think people are annoyed with me for being paranoid and shit. Oh I'm sorry people who's name isn't getting written down, I'm sorry I'm not more pleasant while I'm in fear for my metaphorical life. 
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It’s a MESS ITS A FUCKING MESS SCOTTIE WANTS DAN OUT DAN WANTS DEVON JAKEY WANTS DEVON DEFON WANTS DAN AUGUSTO AND KENDALL WANT JAKEY AMIR WANTS NOT JAKEY OR AUGUSTO OR KENDALL I literally don’t have number in this game and I’m going to get fucked on at the merge 
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Okay so Augusto basically told him that his name was an option for this vote or the next one and Kendall told him that the brawns are bringing up his name and said that he was the throw away vote So now my gut is telling me dan did it and jakey was in on it But I don’t care, if that’s the case Everyone on this tribe wants a brawn out, EVERYONE I just have to make sure it’s not jakey Because Augusto and Kendall want jakey now and I refuse it Rn it seems they r okay doing dan It seems everyone is cool doing dan So I’m happy with that
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Jakey is fucking strong arming me r u joking Ndbdjdjsns Jakey talked to scottie And got scottie to want devon So now they’re gonna try and call the alliance tmmrw and change to vote back to devon over dan And if Augusto and Kendall don’t want to Jakey wants to pull brain and brawn to vote kendall like sir I’m literally getting strong armed, and he can’t see why people want dan out I could make a move rn But should I even I probably shouldn’t If they try to get kendall I will flip it on him 
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don’t know what to do I’m pleading so hard with jakey rn like hey it’s not good for me to go into merge with 6 brawn 4 beauty (dysfunctional) and 3 brain (dysfunctional) And I said I want to do dan is that okay like jakey u need to choose a side, brawns, or this tribe And he goes If u decide to do dan Then I’m gonna unite dan and Scott and Devon and vote kendall So if that’s the case, I’m sending u home theres no way around it then
Throw back to last night when I hung up on jakey to call Augusto and told jakey that I was taking a shower but literally I was gone for an hour and needed an excuse fast so I told him i shaved my ass call that strategic ass shaking 
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Okay so this tribal. Everyone on my tribe thinks jakey is evil and he’s just going to go back to the brawn tribe, which is like, wtf, he literally voted in minority on purpose and gave us leverage on him. Like he literally has put himself on the line multiple times. He ratted out the brawn majority over and over. Like jakey is not loyal to the brawns on the other side at all. The people on this tribe don’t give a shit and my opinion isn’t being heard at all, Kendall won’t budge and Augusto won’t budge, and Scott wants to keep devon. Can I just say scott is a rat, he is playing every single person. Jakey trusted him soooo much . Anyway, everyone wants jakey out for literallt no reason and jakey trusts me 100% and jakey is the best way to get info from the brawns on the other side. Anyway, KDJDKSN KDNDKD we are getting dirty. Jakey has an idol. And I told him he was the vote and I made it sound like it’s all Scott’s decision cuz I’m really tight with Kendall and Augusto, so now, jakey wants to idol out Scott Basically, it’s time for a cluster fuck and it’s time for chaos So at merge jakey and I will play from Opposite sides
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so jakey fking tried to flip the vote and he blew up the 5 person alliance to devon and hes fucking up my game so much nkwejfnkew god maybe i will try and get him out at merge even tho i love him, i basically had to ccreate this narrative that jakey thinks that me jakey scott and devon are voting kendall but jakey is actually voting out scott jesus christ thi round gave me a migraine i have a case of the lie-abetes
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I- there's nothing else to say hahaha the boys don't even talk game. So when I know something y'all will know something
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People are paranoid as hell about a merge. What is there to be paranoid about, honestly? I've just tried to come into this game and have a good time and I think I've achieved that. No one is really looking at me as a threat right now, and there's still plenty of time left to play.
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okay so i filmed a video confessional earlier which i will upload but adam just woke me up to the fact that we might be merging tonight?! which is so exciting and kinda crazy.... and the days line up with montenegro for us to be merging... at merge i think all my "laying low" can finally be for something and i can transition the bonds i've been making into making stuff happen. i've also been hosting a game during these quarantine times and i've realised people that do too much making SUCH deep bonds during the early stages become the people the jury is mad at in the endgame. i feel like im the middle ground, people feel close to me (and I would like to think I've come across as likable) without everyone thinking im their soul sister closest ally. at merge i think my "close" people who i can somewhat rely on are: autumn, jake, dan(?), jordan(?) and adam? like i have a core of people with various connections, which gives me some cover. its just about then feeling out the rest and seeing who i can trust amongst the rest... particularly the unknowns of augusto/kendall/scott/amir (assuming they are all at merge). like that is going to be the most important part of the merge stage for me, is figuring out which of them i can trust (and i do think dan and/or jake's opinions can help with this, because brainstorming with autumn helped me figuring out this hathor swap tribe).
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i'm excited for merge... i do think i have early juror written all over me but i am also very excited. its time to emerge from the shadows and stumble my way into the light
live fast die young merge boots do it well. i literally am a clown, i got excited by my guess going so well and now i literally am a target the size of the sun exclusively because of my own actions what was i thinking KJASDFA honestly at this point? i embrace it, i push the 'im a shield' narrative and i trot on my little trotters to being mayor of ponderosa. this season i chopped of my own head so will not be the winner and the king, but hopefully i can be a kingmaker? also if me winning the tiebreak sends jake home i literally will be so unspeakably frustrated with myself i will literally... scream. HE PROBS HATES ME. i'm praying he lives i will feel so bad if he doesnt KLASDF
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i literally... can not believe i am so stupid my lack of braincells really boggles my mind
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So I was really hoping that we would win this challenge today because I like everyone on this tribe. But of course with my luck in this game, we lose AGAIN. And it's a shame because I like the Thots Alliance and i feel bad voting out Devon. I know he's someone who trusts me and although I don't 100% trust him, I know that he's someone I can depend on. Plus he makes a really good goat at the end, so it'll make winning more of an obstacle for me without him there. To my surprise however, Kendall and Augusto approach me with the idea of voting out Jakey. I really like Jakey and I practically see him as my #1 here, so voting him out would be difficult for me to do as well. We've discussed the idol together, he gave me his CBS all access account info to watch the finale, and hes one of the very few smart people in this game. So on a personal level, this is a hard decision to make. However, from a game perspective, it might be the right call. Jakey's setting himself up to be a swing vote at the merge, and the fact that he campaigned for Dan to stay and was adamant on not voting him out shows that. When it comes to Devon and I, I would prefer to not vote Devon out but if I needed to in order to show that I trust an alliance moving forward I would. So the fact that Jakey doesn't see it like that is alarming to me. In addition to that, I know that Jakey has lied to me multiple times in this game. He purposefully gave me the wrong idol clue for one of the matches, and when I called him out on it he bluffed it up. On top of that, I know for a fact that he voted for Kendall during the AJ vote. And the fact that he's trying to play it off on Devon goes to show the lengths he would go to make sure he controls everything. And on top of that, he wants us all to tell Devon straight up that he's going. Like... did he not learn from my story when I tried to do that? It can't happen. From a game perspective, voting out Jakey is the more logical choice to make. He can navigate better in a group of people and is aware of whats going on. Devon on the other hand, doesn't even know where the idol is or how to look for it. Devon is someone who you can take into a merge and know what he's going to do. Jakey is more unpredictable. And I wouldn't be surprised if he tried to rally up troops to blindside me when that time came. From a personal perspective, I prefer that Devon goes just because of the lack of trust between us and the fact that I don't ever see myself fully trusting him. Sadly I have to lose this battle in order to win the war at the end. So I'm going to vote Jakey out tonight and really hope that it doesn't come to bite me in the but or that he doesn't play his idol (i know he has one, its obvious with how paranoid he's been)
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Guess I’m gonna cry because we lost… by a tiebreaker… it was sad. I feel especially awful because had I not made the mistake of repeating a name on my list during my 8th guess, we could’ve very well have won… but no one needs to know that! It just blows because going into a potential merge in a 7-5 scenario is NOT it. Plus like, their only vote was a unanimous vote for Connor which like… love Connor, but a rock could vote Connor out. I wanted to see tension, I wanted to see idols played, I wanted to see hands thrown, I wanted to see lines drawn, and I wanted to see messiness but all I ended up seeing? Disappointment. I hate it here deadass (‘:
Aside from being kinda sad we lost, I do feel super secure. Last round, I wanted Dan to leave to get rid of Brawn numbers and have the best chance to get Jakey out and now I have that! I know Amir is on the fence but I know Kendall and Devon would be all for it (Scott is as well, but I didn’t really know how much he’d be about it until this round) so it needs to happen. While I adore Jakey as a person and we’ve connected a lot, our strategic games don’t align at all since he doesn’t tell me much of anything? Most of his info goes to Amir or Scott and I’m being selfish here but I want all the tea (‘: plus him playing double agent with the Brawns at merge is not what I need if we’re going into the merge with not enough numbers. Not only that but Adam is a wildcard in terms of if he’ll work with me or not but Jakey being there with us makes it so Adam wouldn’t want to so there’s that. Girl… i sound like a whole ass gamebot wtf ghfdjnms
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It’s so weird like I am extremely proud of the game I am playing but I still feel inadequate as a player? I know I shouldn’t compare myself to others because I’m ME but my two closest allies (Kendall, Amir) are playing so much better? Amir is able to get all the tea in the world and form those important game connections which I don’t feel like I can yknow? With Kendall, she is just so bold (and beautiful) with her gameplay in a way I could never like she doesn’t mind being the secondary target, she talks to everyone and talks game with everyone, and stuff like that. So in a way, I’m probably not a major threat to people because those two icons are here BUT I also don’t know if that’ll make me seen like a non-factor… that’s just how I feel going into merge and it’s kinda mehhh idk ;-;
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MERGE IS COMING. TOnight actually, people are speculating, but im the only one with the certainty that its tonight and im feeling wonderful. I think if I play my cards right Im gonna have a lot of options come merge. God pending Kendall does not die tonight (hopefully her beauties keep her alive) im gonna suggest we secret pair beware this shit and tsart working from opposite sides to keep each other safe. That will allow me to pick of people Im not working with, while hopefully ensure that people im not with who are with her will be detered from targeting me. Thats my plan but who knows what the true dynamics of merge will be. Ive been playing quiet so far but im about to become the star of teh show, my ego just cant take it.
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i really feel like by getting a five i got jake voted out and i want to scream i literally am gonna be out for blood if he goes
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unstable-reality · 8 years ago
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On Jyn, whom I love like burning
I’ve been thinking about making this post for a while now, and I'm finally at a point where I think I can articulate all of my thoughts.
Two of the criticisms I've seen about Jyn are as follows:
The movie doesn't give us enough information to be able to fully understand her.
The change in her is too abrupt, making her arc seem unrealistic.
I, of course, disagree.
The film tells us the following things about Jyn: she had parents who chose, early on, to rebel; she had a close relationship with her father; she had to flee her home, alone, at a very young age; she watched agents of the Empire kill her mother while her father stood by; she was raised by a soldier as a soldier; she was ultimately left behind by said soldier; she is desperate; she is a lone wolf. From all of this, we can discern that she has been abandoned by one father figure and "betrayed" by another (Galen did not actually betray her, but consider how the events on Lah'mu might look through the eyes of a child: "Dad, Dad who is great and whom I love and who says he loves me and will protect me, just let bad people kill Mom and went with the bad people instead of coming after me"); that her childhood was difficult, violent, and traumatic; and that she has difficulty interacting with other people (which is a direct result of the former points).
The film also tells us that, beneath her tough facade, she cares, and that she maintains a firm moral center positioning her against the Empire. That's why she says that she prefers to believe that her father is dead; that she rescues the child in Jehda; that Saw asks her, "you don't believe in the cause anymore?" Her apathy is feigned. It's a product of the fact that, post-Saw, she shut down and began surviving just for the sake of it, because she was littered with wounds that would not heal.
When Jyn says to Saw, "it's not a problem if you don't look up," she doesn't actually believe it. Watch her: she pauses, and her mouth quivers, and the words come out mealy. It would be easier if she believed it. It would sync up with her trauma. But because she knows right from wrong, she can't say it with conviction; she can only deploy it as a "gotcha," as a set piece in an argument. She is trying, very poorly, and as a self-defense mechanism, to convince herself of a convenient fiction.
The reason she becomes a beacon, a "speech machine," after watching Galen's message is because said message resolves 95% of what she's been going through. It tells her that her father did not actually betray her, that he has always stood against the "bad people," that he wants her to fight against them, too, that he's actually paved the way for her, for everyone, to do it. He's been steadfast and true, something the people in her life, up until then, have decidedly not seemed to be.
Jyn doesn't change, after Jehda. She just takes off her mask.
To that end, Cassian's "welcome home" works on two levels: it welcomes her into her found family, into a group of people whom she can trust and rely upon and who believe in her as much as she believes in them, but it also welcomes her back. She is the prodigal daughter, showing up on the doorstep of her childhood home (the rebellion, lower-case-r because it's the spirit, not the organization) after having worked through all the shit that made her leave.
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broke-ass-twat · 8 years ago
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all of them . . .
Fuck you and fuck the anonymous asker and lets fucking get this shit started. Also do your goddamn work Izzy.
200: My crush’s name is: Hey Izzy. Because that was such a huge secret199: I was born in: October198: I am really: Bored197: My cellphone company is: AT & T (Are you gonna ask my mother’s maiden name and first pet name now?)196: My eye color is: Brown195: My shoe size is: 11?194: My ring size is: Decently large193: My height is: 6 foot tall god192: I am allergic to: Assholes. And cats and dogs and eggs and milk and eggplant191: My 1st car was: I had a first car?190: My 1st job was: I had a first job?189: Last book you read: The first 6 pages of Cat’s Cradle. Alternatively book 25 of Desolate Era (it’s a Chinese wuxia novel)188: My bed is: Comfortable?187: My pet: Don’t have one186: My best friend: I have several185: My favorite shampoo is: Head and shoulders184: Xbox or ps3: Xbox183: Piggy banks are: Chill182: In my pockets: 2 bic pens, typically my phone, wallet, asthma pump, chapstick, and keys181: On my calendar: I don’t really use calendars180: Marriage is: Something I’ll get to179: Spongebob can: Suck my dick (I don’t really get spongebob?)178: My mom: is caring but could use some chill177: The last three songs I bought were? I don’t honestly remember the last time I bought a song. Which is a lie but I don’t know what I bought176: Last YouTube video watched: Vaguely watched the youtube video for Girls by Mura Masa175: How many cousins do you have? Total of 3 I think174: Do you have any siblings? I have a twin sister173: Are your parents divorced? Yes172: Are you taller than your mom? Definitely171: Do you play an instrument? Nope170: What did you do yesterday? Die slowly
[ I Believe In ]169: Love at first sight: Sort of yeah168: Luck: Sort of but not really167: Fate: No166: Yourself: Honestly not really and that accounts for at least 2 rather important problems I can think of165: Aliens: Sure164: Heaven: No163: Hell: No162: God: No161: Horoscopes: They’re fun and sometimes fool me but no160: Soul mates: Not really?159: Ghosts: Sometimes momentarily hen I se shit move in the dark out of the corner of my eyes158: Gay Marriage: Yah157: War: Depends but yah156: Orbs: ????155: Magic: I fucking wish
[ This or That ]154: Hugs or Kisses: Um. Fucking both. but kisses153: Drunk or High: Depends. Mostly drunk152: Phone or Online: Online151: Red heads or Black haired: Read heads are hot150: Blondes or Brunettes: Brunettes149: Hot or cold: Hot148: Summer or winter: Feeling winter atm (I know its odd)147: Autumn or Spring: Autumn 146: Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate when eh. Vanilla when stuff is quality145: Night or Day: Night144: Oranges or Apples: Orange143: Curly or Straight hair: Um. Curly?142: McDonalds or Burger King: McDonalds is my shit (cuz apple pie)141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: Milk chocolate you fucking heathen140: Mac or PC: Mac (theyre prettier tho I know PCs can be better)139: Flip flops or high heals: I don’t really wear either. Both are fine.138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: I can be ugly, sweet, and rich. Tho I guess this means ugly person. Ugly and rich since I’d just do whatever the hell I want and be rich137: Coke or Pepsi: Coke136: Hillary or Obama: Obama135: Burried or cremated: Cremate this mess134: Singing or Dancing: Dancing133: Coach or Chanel: My dude I know fuck all about either brand. Still would go with Chanel132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: Who the fuck?131: Small town or Big city: Big city130: Wal-Mart or Target: They’re both cool. target feels nicer tho129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: I hate them both128: Manicure or Pedicure: manicure127: East Coast or West Coast: This is actually hard. Um. Shit. Hm. Weast coast?126: Your Birthday or Christmas: Christmas. My birthday doesn’t tend to mean a whole lot to me (probably cuz I didn’t really have birthday parties as a kid)125: Chocolate or Flowers: I’ve never gotten flowers and that’d be chill but chocolate124: Disney or Six Flags: Disney probably.123: Yankees or Red Sox: Yankees you fucking heathen
[ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: Avoid it if possible121: George Bush: No very intelligent120: Gay Marriage: It’s fine119: The presidential election: Kill me118: Abortion: It’s your choice and fuck what other people have to say. Though it’s interesting to think about if one potential person wants the child and the other doesn’t. At which point I feel like whoever really wants it that bad should have sole care of it otherwise it’s unfair to both the child and one who didn’t want it. And if the dude wants the child then it’s still the woman’s choice I feel like? But this is rocky but would make a fun conversation tbh117: MySpace: Stop poking the dead thing with a stick116: Reality TV: Mostly really dumb with marginal entertainment115: Parents: Mine I guess are half really good but hard on me for good reason and the other half I seriously feel like I couldn’t care less about. In general Id hope for them to be caring, understanding, firm, and logical114: Back stabbers: Fuck em113: Ebay: Chill concept I’ve never used112: Facebook: Blackhole for my time111: Work: I hate doing it as it very rarely interests me110: My Neighbors: Chill109: Gas Prices: High I guess?108: Designer Clothes: Can be cool but mostly just why and dumb107: College: Fucking scam but also really cool adult babysitting106: Sports: theyre alright I suppose. Don’t really pay them any mind at all105: My family: I only pay attention to the ones I interact with even though there is a family member I really should talk to but don’t cuz I have a hard time caring although I really should104: The future: Scary
[ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: Today sorta. If not today then sunday102: Last time you ate: Like an hour ago101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: Thanksgiving100: Cried in front of someone: It’s been a while. Don’t remember99: Went to a movie theater: During spring break like 2 weeks ago98: Took a vacation: like 2 weeks ago97: Swam in a pool: been a while. Swam in the ocean like 2 weeks ago
96: Changed a diaper: I’ve never done that
95: Got my nails done: never94: Went to a wedding: It’s been a few years. Would’ve liked to go to one this year but couldn’t for some pretty shit reasons93: Broke a bone: Never92: Got a peircing: Never91: Broke the law: Um. Like Saturday90: Texted: like 30 minutes ago
[ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: Things that are funny. Also myself88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: Parents paying for shit87: The last movie I saw: Get out86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: Figuring out my shit85: The thing im not looking forward to: the future84: People call me: Kemi83: The most difficult thing to do is: Have self control and follow through on it82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: Never81: My zodiac sign is: Libra80: The first person i talked to today was: Today a girl named sara cuz I was up and around at 2am79: First time you had a crush: Like elementary school78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: There is no one I can’t hide things from77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: I have no idea. Probably within the last few days76: Right now I am talking to: Well right now I’m not talking to anyone75: What are you going to do when you grow up: Hopefully happy and relatively successful74: I have/will get a job: hopefully over the summer73: Tomorrow: Is another day72: Today: Is my current reality that I really should use a lot more wisely but tend not to71: Next Summer: It’d be nice to be a more productive person70: Next Weekend: Probably gonna be doing fuck all instead of doing work69: I have these pets: I don’t have pets68: The worst sound in the world: Nails on a  chalkboard, velcro ripping, people chewing with their fucking mouths open. I can’t choose one67: The person that makes me cry the most is: Um. Prolly my stepfather?66: People that make you happy: My friends occasionally family when they aren’t disappointed in me65: Last time I cried: I dunno64: My friends are: Chill63: My computer is: Cool but mostly a huge distraction I literally can’t live without cuz I need it for everything. And I also really like it.62: My School: Is meh. Some chill people61: My Car: Don’t have one60: I lose all respect for people who: I suppose cheat59: The movie I cried at was: I dunno58: Your hair color is: Black57: TV shows you watch: I dunno. A lot 56: Favorite web site: Youtube probably55: Your dream vacation: Europe54: The worst pain I was ever in was: I don’t remember feeling pain I thought was all that intense. Like shit has hurt a lot but not like holy fuck I’m screaming53: How do you like your steak cooked: Medium52: My room is: A little dirty atm51: My favorite celebrity is: Um. Gordon Ramsey I suppose? Don’t really have one50: Where would you like to be: In a very nice restaurant sipping very nice whiskey with a lot of money. Ive said this before.49: Do you want children: Maybe eventually. At least 2 but not more than 348: Ever been in love: yeah47: Who’s your best friend: I have multiple46: More guy friends or girl friends: I definitely have more girl friends45: One thing that makes you feel great is: music44: One person that you wish you could see right now: My girlfriend would be nice to just chill with tbh43: Do you have a 5 year plan: Don’t be a failure is sorta just it. realistically grad school.42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: I actually haven't 41: Have you pre-named your children: Nope40: Last person I got mad at: Um. I dunno39: I would like to move to: Somewhere on the west coast38: I wish I was a professional: Chef
[ My Favorites ]37: Candy: Twix is up there36: Vehicle: Teslas are pretty fucking cool35: President: Obama probably wasn’t the best but damn was he chill34: State visited: California never really disappoints me33: Cellphone provider: AT &T I guess? What the hell sort of question is this32: Athlete: Um. Don’t really have one. Ichiro Suzuki seems pretty chill. Curtis Grandson also seems chill. What can I say my stepdad likes the Yankees. Well so does my father31: Actor: Um. idk30: Actress: Idk29: Singer: Adele comes to mind cuz damn that voice. But I probably have others I like more and don’t remember28: Band: Mura Masa is high up there for producers. So is Flume, Ekali atm, Ta-ku, and Snago27: Clothing store: Don’t really have one. Uniqlo is pretty chill26: Grocery store: Fairways is chill25: TV show: Adventure time probably24: Movie: Don’t really have one tbh23: Website: I Don’t per se have a favorite. I like tumblr and Facebook 22: Animal: Deer are chill21: Theme park: Don’t have one. Which ever one has the wildest roller coasters20: Holiday: Um. Christmas19: Sport to watch: Baseball if I had to choose18: Sport to play: Ultimate frisbee17: Magazine: Cooks Illustrated is cool16: Book: Don’t really have one15: Day of the week: Friday or saturday14: Beach: Orange beach atm cuz it’s the nicest one i’ve been to13: Concert attended: Shitttttttt. Alina Baraz and Jauz are really high up there12: Thing to cook: I like making pasta cuz I do all sorts of shit to the sauce and I’m good at it. I also make pretty decent pork chops and shit. I dunno. 11: Food: Sushi probably. Also like steak and curry a lot.10: Restaurant: Um. Five guys? I don’t really have one.9: Radio station: Don’t really listen to radio8: Yankee candle scent: Don’t know any7: Perfume: same as above6: Flower: honeysuckle5: Color: Blue and green4: Talk show host: Don’t have one3: Comedian: Louis C.K. is great2: Dog breed: Cant choose1: Did you answer all these truthfully? Very
#me
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marymosley · 4 years ago
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“Incubator of Racist Hate And White Supremacy”: Dartmouth Faculty and Students Demand Action Against Conservative Newspaper and Columnists
We have previously discussed attacks on both faculty and students for expressing opposing views of the current protests or their underlying causes, including a recent case at Georgetown where a student was censured by the student senate. Now, over 1000 students and faculty members have signed a letter to the Dartmouth Board of Trustees to disassociate the school from the conservative student newspaper, the Dartmouth Review. The letter accuses the newspaper of “hateful ideologies” and “racist” columns, including one cited column objecting to the careless use of the word “racist.” There were two striking aspects to this story. First, the Dartmouth Review (which counts such conservative figures as filmmaker Dinesh D’Souza and Fox anchor Laura Ingraham among its alumni) has always been an independent newspaper. Second, the reason stated by the organizers to move against the newspaper in part because of a recent controversy involving an alumni who resigned from Fox News.
The Review website states that it was was founded in 1980 to “question stale academic orthodoxy and to preserve Dartmouth College’s unique liberal arts character.”
The petition cites some columns that the Review has previously self-condemned for racist tropes or language. However, the organizers admit that they decided to move against the newspaper as a way to responding to the controversy surrounding the resignation of a Fox producer with Tucker Carlson. Blake Neff is a 2013 graduate of Dartmouth and Review alumni. He was found to have written a series of bigoted anonymous comments.
Diana Whitney ’95, says that attacking the newspaper was viewed as a way to respond to the Neff story. Laura Tyson Li ’85 came up with the idea of the letter to force the Board to prove its antiracism by attacking the newspaper, which had no role in Neff’s misconduct:  “We thought, how can the senior leadership of Dartmouth, President Hanlon and the trustees write this letter to every member of the community, and then continue in silent complicity with a publication that since its inception has consistently been an incubator of racist hate and white supremacy?”
Whitney is an author who cites bylines in the New York Times and Washington Post.  Yet, she is leading an effort to punish student authors.
What Whitney calls “silent complicity” is the Board not actively opposing the conservative newspaper. The failure actively target the newspaper is now viewed as de facto tolerance for racism even after the school issued a letter proclaiming its support for Black Lives Matter.
The student editors have objected that the cited articles in recent publications do not contain racist attacks but rather criticism of prevailing views on racism.  The student editors note that one of “insidiously racist pieces of recent years” was a piece on the careless use of “racist” and “sexist” labels.  It also cites the fact that the newspaper uses a logo containing the image of Dartmouth’s iconic weathervane, which the university removed earlier in 2020 as offensive to Native Americans.
The student editors address the criticism in an article, titled “An Overdue Response to the College Jacobins.” The editors wrote “Notably, the petitioners also botched the College’s mission statement, strategically editing ‘the vigorous and open debate of ideas within a community marked by mutual respect,’ to specifically exclude ‘vigorous and open debate,’ but this frankly isn’t markedly surprising.”
As a blog committed to free speech issues, the concern over this controversy is obvious. There are routinely over-heated rhetoric in college newspapers including many reckless statements from faculty and students on the left. We have defended many of those speakers and writers.  However, the first response of many Dartmouth graduates to the Neff story was to seek to attack the leading conservative newspaper on campus in part for its prior association with Neff.
The effort to deny the use of “Dartmouth” is clearly meant to marginalize and exclude these conservative students.  What is being lost in such moves is the diversity of thought on campus.  These student editors contribute to a passionate dialogue on these issues.  Graduates like Whitney can voice their own views and write their own columns. Instead, they are seeking to pressure the university to marginalize students who want to participate in these debates from a conservative viewpoint.
Adrienne Lotson ’82, is quoted as saying the newspaper should never have been allowed to use the name of the college where all of the writers and editors are students:
“Dartmouth lost an opportunity in the 1980s when the Review was founded to make a firm standing on not using the Dartmouth name. People are always talking about free speech issues, this isn’t a matter of shutting down the paper, this is a matter of not using the Dartmouth name.”
It is about free speech when you are seeking to marginalize or exclude students because you disagree with their views. This is a successful student newspaper with decades of columns and alumni. It is part of the diverse fabric of the university with more liberal publications and student groups. There is every reason why these students would identify with the college where they study and write.  Moreover, the letter includes the demand that the university “hold student staffers accountable for their bigotry.”  Lotson is accusing these students of being racist and demanding punishment for their writings.  That is a free speech issue. The letter leaves such allegations on a highly generalized level while seeking potential expulsion for student writers.
Lotson is also demanding that the Board prove its commitment against racism by acting against this conservative newspaper: “What we are looking for is a bold, broad statement of the newspaper and the division it has sown at Dartmouth.”
The petition below is just five relatively short paragraphs (including one on Neff) that makes sweeping claims of racism, sexism, and other abuses without any discussion of specific language or the context for the writings. When you are calling for possible expulsion of college students, there should be an obligation to do more than labeling unspecified claims of racism and sexism. It links to four “insidiously racist pieces” but only two are from 2020. 
February 5th, 2020: “On Moral Currency”
http://dartreview.com/on-moral-currency/
January 22, 2020: “Bridging the Gap: Affirmative Action”
http://dartreview.com/bridging-the-gap-affirmative-action/
May 8th, 2017: “The Problems of Affirmative Action”
http://dartreview.com/the-problems-of-affirmative-action/
November 7th, 2016: “In Defense of Milo Yiannopoulos”
http://dartreview.com/in-defense-of-milo-yiannopoulos/
The first article  by Ethan Y. Cai is written by a minority student who explores what he considers to be reckless use of racism labels and discusses his own encounters with race-based insults:
“I hesitate to call what I experienced “racism.” Not that many of my negative experiences weren’t largely based on my race—they certainly were. I hesitate to call it “racism” because what I went through wasn’t all that bad. Every specific label for a problem implies a certain response. When we call something “racist” we expect people to rise up and fix the problem. In a perfect world, everything even slightly “racist” would be fixed. Unfortunately, we don’t live in a perfect world, we live in a real world—one defined by limited supply and unlimited demand.”
The second 2020 article is by another minority student, Zachary Z. Wang, who explores what the logic of affirmative action and the author’s disagreement with it:
The liberal point of view uses the principle of regression towards the mean to explain how affirmative action will swiftly correct for racial inequality. Regression towards the mean states that under the circumstance of many trials, the average of those trials will eventually approach the mean (the actual true value).
Since many minorities have been displaced to the lower end of opportunity due to systematic oppression, liberal logic states that by using affirmative action to continually place them above the mean—giving them easier access to more competitive schools—eventually the average academic performance of these minorities will approach the actual average academic performance in society. When these two means of academic performance are equivalent, then affirmative action is no longer needed. This is logically sound reasoning, and everyone should be in favor of equal opportunity for those of all demographics (this operates under the assumption that all races are equally capable of the same level of academic performance, which I believe to be the case).
None of the context or language is quoted, let alone addressed.  Rather, the petition simply makes sweeping allegations of
“malicious and dishonest “conservatism” through vituperative ad hominem attacks, covert and overt racism, vicious taunting and race-baiting, and blatant homophobia and misogyny. BIPOC students, faculty, and staff have been harmed by this bastion of racism on campus, as have Jewish people, women, and members of the LGBTQ community.”
Those labels can ruin a student’s future. Yet, two students are cited as vehement racists without the slightest effort to address their viewpoints or claims of non-racist reasons for the columns.  I am particularly surprised to see faculty sign such a letter attacking student authors. The signatories include Professors Mary Desjardins, Eng-Beng Lim, Mark Williams, Mary Coffey, Jodie Mack, Annabel Martín, Katie Hornstein, Kristin O’Rourke, Desiree Garcia, Melissa Zeiger, Christopher MacEvitt, Peter Hackett, and Leslie Sonder.  Professors Mary Desjardins, Desiree Garcia, Mark Williams, and Jodie Mack teach media studies at Dartmouth and yet have no qualms in signing this petition, including a call for the disciplining of student authors presumably based on these two columns. .
The university itself has declined (thus far) to make any gratuitous moves against the newspaper — citing its commitment to both protecting free speech and opposing racism. College spokesperson Diana Lawrence noted that the newspaper is  “not a recognized student organization and receives no funding or support from Dartmouth.”  She added:
“All students, faculty, and staff enjoy the freedom to speak, write and listen, and are encouraged to challenge ideas, in pursuit of better learning and understanding. However, bias or discrimination in any form — including racism, sexism, homophobia and transphobia — are contrary to Dartmouth values.”
Here is the petition: Dartmouth Petition
“Incubator of Racist Hate And White Supremacy”: Dartmouth Faculty and Students Demand Action Against Conservative Newspaper and Columnists published first on https://immigrationlawyerto.tumblr.com/
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bigmacdaddio · 5 years ago
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IOWA Legendary Coach
‘He’s the king’: Remembering the unmistakable charisma and enduring legacy of Hayden Fry
By Scott Dochterman
Dec 17, 2019
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IOWA CITY, Iowa — An icon. An innovator. A motivator. A legend.
College Football Hall of Fame coach Hayden Fry was all of these. Now, after losing a final battle with cancer at age 90, he belongs to the ages.
No single person wielded more influence at the University of Iowa or was more important to its history than Fry. From inventing the logo that still represents the Hawkeyes to breaking the Michigan-Ohio State 13-year Rose Bowl stranglehold to building one of the sport’s greatest coaching trees to shattering the Southwest Conference racial barrier at SMU, Fry’s influence on college football ranks among the most impactful in the sport’s history.
“Hayden Fry is a college football icon and an Iowa legend,” Iowa coach Kirk Ferentz said in a statement. “His Hall of Fame career is well known, but personally, he will always be the man who took a chance on me at the start of my coaching career. I was proud to coach with him and honored to succeed him when he retired. He’s been a great mentor and a true friend. I am forever grateful to him.”
Fry was born in Eastland, Texas, and grew up in Odessa. His homespun, colloquial clichés were formed in his days as a West Texas youth. His common phrase “scratch where it itches” became his trademark Haydenism. Few, if any, coaches had a better psychological read on a team or a situation. Fry was folksy and funny but could be tough and stern. His military background as a captain in the Marines demanded discipline. He finished his 37-year coaching career with a 232-178-10 coaching record. He was inducted into the College Football Hall of Fame in 2003.
With unmistakable charisma, Fry developed friendships as a youngster with Roy Orbison and President George H.W. Bush and later with John Wayne and Lee Iacocca, the Ford Motor Co. and Chrysler Corp. CEO. Fry once said that Iacocca was so impressed with SMU’s hard-fought loss to Michigan that he named Ford’s muscle vehicle “the Mustang.”
Fry became Iowa’s coach in 1979 and ended a 19-year streak of non-winning seasons with a Rose Bowl appearance in 1981. It was the first time since 1967 that a team other than Michigan or Ohio State represented the league in Pasadena. Fry won Big Ten titles in 1981, 1985 and 1990 and guided the Hawkeyes to 14 bowl games over a 17-year period. His 96 wins in Big Ten play sit fifth in league annals.
Fry’s coaching tree ranks among the elite in college football history. His 1983 staff included Bill Snyder, Barry Alvarez, Kirk Ferentz, Dan McCarney and Bob Stoops, all of whom became the winningest head coaches at their respective schools. Others like Bret Bielema, Mike Stoops, Mark Stoops, Bo Pelini, Jim Leavitt, Jay Norvell and Bob Diaco started their coaching careers under Fry.
But of all his many accomplishments, Fry was most proud of giving Jerry LeVias a scholarship at SMU to integrate the Southwest Conference in 1965.
“That is the greatest thing I did in 47 years of coaching, from high school to the Marine Corps to college, is to give the first black player a scholarship in that part of the world because it opened up the door for all the other fine black players to at least have a choice of where they wanted to go to school,” Fry said. “Because at that time they had to go to the Big Ten or the Pac-10 or whatever.
“That was a very difficult thing to do. I’ve been told repeatedly by law enforcement, specifically by the FBI and CIA and other people I had to deal with, not to discuss it publicly because what it does is it triggers all the other people in the world that are sick or as I call the rednecks who are still fighting the Civil War and they do bad things. So you don’t discuss some of those things. But I can just tell you briefly I would say 95 percent of you present would not believe what Jerry LeVias went through, what I went through, what my coaching staff went through from examining our locker room on out-of-town trips, to checking the airplane that we flew on to see if there was a bomb on it, whatever. We even had a sniper in the stands at one of the games that was going to kill Jerry.
(Bettmann / Getty Images)
“We screened all of his mail, all of his telephone calls. But he had real problems on campus, from his own teammates, some of the faculty members. They just weren’t used to dealing with African-Americans and it was bad and to this day it was bad. A lot of it is not publicized. And I would never tell Jerry all of the things that were bad because it would have scared him to death. He was scared enough as it was.”
In a statement Tuesday night, LeVias said, “Coach Fry caught a lot of hell for doing what he did.”
Fry led SMU for 11 seasons. In 1966, he took the Mustangs to the Southwest Conference title and a Cotton Bowl berth. In his final season, SMU finished 7-4 but Fry was fired after a 49-66-1 overall record.
“I remember as a kid watching the Hayden Fry Show in Texas at SMU,” said longtime Iowa assistant Don Patterson, who was Fry’s offensive coordinator from 1989-98. “Anybody who knows anything about Texas football understands he’s a living legend in Texas. To this day he is. He can’t go anywhere in Texas without being noticed.”
After leaving SMU, Fry spent six years at North Texas and posted 10-1 and 9-2 records in his final two years, respectively. His Mean Green squad, however, was not invited to a bowl game either year and it frustrated him. In late 1978, he met with Iowa athletics director Bump Elliott to discuss the vacant Hawkeyes job. That meeting changed the course of Iowa and the Big Ten forever.
Picking Iowa
The Hawkeyes had become a college football wasteland. Iowa hadn’t posted a winning season since 1961, and from 1970-78, the Hawkeyes were 25-71-2. Yet with a strong fan base continuing to fill Kinnick Stadium, Elliott tapped the confident, loquacious Texan to reverse the generational decline.
Fry held a news conference on Dec. 10, 1978, and vowed to change the culture.
“We will be colorful, tough, and we will have exciting football,” Fry said that day, as reported by the Cedar Rapids Gazette. “I’ve always been a passing coach. We throw the football to open up the defense so we can do what we want to do — run the football.
“We may run the Statue of Liberty play out of the end zone; that’s my style of football. We are exciting, but we do this in order to win.”
In the Hawkeyes’ home opener, the Hawkeyes faithful gave Fry and his team a standing ovation as they shifted into multiple formations. Iowa blew a 26-3 lead in a 30-26 loss to Indiana, which was coached by Lee Corso. The following week, Iowa traveled to Oklahoma and competed against the mighty Sooners and Heisman Trophy-winning running back Billy Sims, but still lost 21-6.
In what initially seemed like a moral victory, Fry, a psychology major at Baylor, saw it differently.
“I just told my football team that’s what’s wrong with our ball club,” Fry said, as reported by the Cedar Rapids Gazette. “We get our asses kicked and we get complimented. If I see one guy with a smile on his face, I’m gonna bust him right in the mouth.”
Iowa finished 5-6 in his first year and 4-7 in 1980. Still, the vibe had changed around the program entering his third season.
“I think people sensed that Hayden was different, that the program he brought was different than what they had seen before,” said Alvarez, then the Iowa linebackers coach. “We were very competitive.”
Fry wanted to change the image of Iowa football as much as the on-field product. He gained permission from the Pittsburgh Steelers to pattern the Hawkeyes’ black-and-gold uniforms in a similar fashion. He opted for a different logo on the helmet, so he solicited ideas from fans and partnered with an advertising firm. After a weekend of sketches, Bill Colbert of Three Arts Advertising in Cedar Rapids, Iowa, designed the TigerHawk.
“From where I come from, it’s called selling the sizzle before the steak,” Fry said.
The players were instructed to enter and leave the playing field in a “Swarm” formation, which signifies both the team aspect and also was designed to prevent energy burnout.
Fry also had the Kinnick Stadium visiting locker room walls painted pink because he considered it a passive color. For 40 years, different teams have papered every inch of the locker room to try to alter its effects on their players. When Iowa faced a tough opponent, Fry was loose with his players and quarreled with media over trivial matters to deflect attention. When the Hawkeyes played an inferior opponent, Fry drilled his players like a taskmaster.
“He was a wonderful head coach,” said Phil Haddy, a member of Iowa’s sports information department from 1971-2011. “He was a wonderful administrator. At the same time, a huckster. He could sell tickets. He was good. Whenever he went to a press conference, I’d go up and visit with him first. He’d always be sour. ‘It’s not in my contract. I don’t have to do these things.’ When he’d walk into the room, every week, ‘How y’all doing?’ He’d be smiling. He’d be 110 percent professional.
“He was a dying breed. He did everything. He sold tickets. He coached. He got everybody interested in things. He did it all. Today, the coaches want to coach. Hayden would go to I-Clubs and he’d get there early and he’d stay late and shook every hand. Hayden was a one-of-a-kind. He’s the king.”
During the farming crisis in 1985, Fry had a sticker with the initials “ANF — America Needs Farmers” placed on Iowa’s helmets. He also sang and danced “The Hokey Pokey” in the locker room after victories and wore white pants and sunglasses on the sidelines.
(Iowa Athletics)
“I’m not sure there’s another person alive who could come in and accomplish what he did in terms of turning things around, changing attitudes,” Ferentz said in a previous interview. “The impact he had, not just on the program, but the entire state was just unbelievable.”
Magical year
In 1981, Fry finally had a team that could match his marketing. With a defense that still sits among the best in school history, the Hawkeyes stopped No. 6 Nebraska 10-7 in the opener. Two weeks later, Iowa beat No. 6 UCLA 20-7.
“Gee whiz, how about that!” Fry said afterward. “We got two of the top 10. How sweet it is!”
With a 9-7 upset over defending Big Ten champion and No. 5-ranked Michigan and a 33-7 win against Purdue to stop a 20-game losing streak to the Boilermakers, Fry finally pushed Iowa to its elusive winning season.
“Waaa-hooo,” Fry yelled when he met with reporters. “Twenty cotton-picking years, and we finally did it. We had a great opportunity to fold our tent for the season after last week (a loss to Illinois) and we didn’t do it.”
Entering the regular-season finale, Iowa needed Ohio State to beat Michigan and then topple Michigan State to reach the Rose Bowl. By the third quarter, word of Ohio State’s victory reached Kinnick Stadium. The Hawkeyes crushed the Spartans 36-7 to claim a share of its first Big Ten title since 1958 and earn a trip to Pasadena.
“It was a group of young men that were very hungry, been kicked around, had a hard time,” Fry said on one of his final trips to Iowa City. “To see them win the Big Ten championship was one of the highlights of my career.
“They hadn’t had a winning season in 19 seasons and psychologically, I had a great advantage because they were easy to motivate. They were told they couldn’t win, and they were determined to show people that they could.”
Starting safety Bob Stoops, who later became a national championship-winning head coach at Oklahoma, said Fry’s motivation was what propelled the Hawkeyes to the Rose Bowl.
“He had swagger. He projected confidence,” Stoops said during an Iowa City appearance. “That’s what we needed at the time at Iowa. We’re like, ‘You know what, we can beat anyone.’ Hayden gave us that swagger and that attitude, and I’ve always remembered it.”
The Hawkeyes became a formidable Big Ten program for the rest of the decade. In 1985, Iowa was ranked No. 1 nationally for five consecutive weeks. In the first No. 1 vs. No. 2 game in Big Ten history, the Hawkeyes beat Michigan on a game-winning field goal on the game’s final play. The Hawkeyes won the Big Ten title outright and earned another trip to Pasadena. His quarterback, Chuck Long, was a two-time consensus All-American quarterback and finished second in Heisman Trophy voting that year.
“Hayden was disciplined, but he made it fun,” Long said. “There’s times you don’t want to even go to practice because it’s drudgery and it’s mundane. It was never mundane under Hayden Fry. Every day you’re like, ‘What he’s going to say next?’ You couldn’t wait to get to practice because it was so much fun. Now we worked hard. We worked extremely hard, but we always had fun. I think that’s a special trait.
“We ended with what we called a cheer. It was on the script. Cheer. C-h-e-e-r. So he gathered up the team, whether it was a good practice or a bad practice and said cheer. Led us with a story or a joke. Something funny and end on a good note every day. Regardless of how the practice went.”
In 1990, Fry took the Hawkeyes to the Rose Bowl for the final time. A year later, Iowa finished 10-1-1, the school’s best single-season record under the coach. Twice, Fry’s teams finished in the top 10 and placed in the top 25 eight other times. From 1981-91, only Michigan won more league and bowl games among Big Ten teams than Iowa.
(Wally Fong / AP)
Fry’s 143 wins were the most in school history until Ferentz passed him in 2018 and rank sixth all time among Big Ten coaches. Fry’s 96 league victories are fifth, one shy of Ferentz.
“Coach Fry probably doesn’t get enough credit for just the impact he had on this entire conference, let alone our program,” Ferentz said.
Legacy
Fry’s coaching tree is what defines him outside of Iowa. His first offensive coordinator was Snyder, the architect of the sport’s greatest turnaround at Kansas State. Alvarez, who achieved similar success at Wisconsin, coached the linebackers until 1986. Both are in the College Football Hall of Fame.
Joining them in the hall of fame one day will be Stoops, who was 190-48 in 18 seasons at Oklahoma with 10 Big 12 titles and a national championship in 2000. Ferentz coached Iowa’s offensive line and has 161 wins at Iowa. Defensive line coach Dan McCarney has the most victories in Iowa State history.
“Coach Fry would say, ‘If I had one particular skill, it was probably my ability to judge who to hire,’” said Patterson, who is one victory shy of becoming Western Illinois’ all-time wins leader. “He always famously said, ‘I won’t hire coaches who don’t have an interest in being head coaches.’ That wasn’t always true. (Defensive coordinator) Bill Brashier had opportunities to be a head coach and passed them up to stay at Iowa. I think it generally was true.”
In 2018, Mark Stoops guided Kentucky to a 10-win season for only the third time in school history. Bielema took Wisconsin to three consecutive Big Ten titles from 2010 through 2012.
“The day he retired, he came into my office and he sat and he said some really cool things,” Bielema said. “He wrote me a letter that I carry in my planner to this day and said ‘You’re a good coach, you’re going to be a head coach someday, make sure you’re prepared when you get there.’ I was crying my eyes out because the biggest mentor in my life was retiring.”
Fry’s legacy within Iowa encompasses all of his accomplishments. The football complex around Kinnick Stadium is named for Fry. In Coralville, First Avenue was renamed Hayden Fry Way. In 2009, FryFest debuted, which celebrates everything associated with Iowa athletics. In 2016, Fry’s bronze likeness was unveiled with a 6-foot statue. Fry, then 87, made his final public appearance and smiled, waved and spoke before a crowd of about 800. In typical Fry fashion, Fry offered up a quip before the statue was unveiled.
(Scott Dochterman / The Athletic)
“The main thing is, be sure you put me high enough on the foundation that the dogs can’t urinate on my shoes,” Fry said to laughs.
There never will be another Hayden Fry. Not in Iowa. Not in college football. Not anywhere.
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titheguerrero · 6 years ago
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Make Asbestos Great Again? - Trump Once Claimed "Movement Against by Asbestos was Led by the Mob," Now is EPA Wants to Relax Asbestos Regulation
Introduction:  An Old Public Health Menace This is somewhat personal.  In the early 1980s, as a general internal medicine fellow, I gave a series of talks about important medical problems that generalist physicians often missed.  One was asbestos related disease.  Although asbestos had been heavily regulated since 1973, there were stilll large numbers of people exposed to it alive in the 1980s.  One of my primitive slides, seemingly a picture of type writing, stated that around then, 2 to 4 million people who had histories of significant asbestos exposure were likely alive.  Asbestos is known to cause several cancers.  It is likely the nearly exclusive cause of mesothelioma.  It also causes lung cancer, and may act synergistically with smoking, and likely gastrointestinal and head and neck cancer.  It causes asbestosis, which can lead to respiratory failure. In 2018, the evidence that asbestos is a major health hazard is quite clear. (See summaries by The National Cancer Institute, the Agency for Toxic Substances and Disease Registry, the Occupational Safety and Health Adminstration.)  Note that the rates of death from mesothelioma per capita are declining, but still substantial (look here).  The application of asbestos can be very hazardous, but once applied it can still endanger not only those who remove it, but firefighters, other first responders, etc.  People can be exposed indirectly, e.g., from asbestos on the clothes of people who work directly with it.  Unlike other countries, the US never banned asbestos outright.  However, per the NCI report, 
In the late 1970s, the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) banned the use of asbestos in wallboard patching compounds and gas fireplaces because the asbestos fibers in these products could be released into the environment during use. In addition, manufacturers of electric hairdryers voluntarily stopped using asbestos in their products in 1979. In 1989, the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) banned all new uses of asbestos; however, uses developed before 1989 are still allowed.
Trump Called the Movement Against Asbestos a Plot by Organized Crime As we discussed in 2016, Donald Trump has pooh poohed all that.  Per Mother Jones,
In his 1997 book, The Art of the Comeback, Trump warned America not to buy the crusade against 'the greatest fire-proofing material ever used.' He claimed the movement to remove asbestos—a known carcinogen—was actually the handiwork of the mafia: 'I believe that the movement against asbestos was led by the mob, because it was often mob-related companies that would do the asbestos removal. Great pressure was put on politicians, and as usual, the politicians relented. Millions of truckloads of this incredible fire-proofing material were taken to special 'dump sites' and asbestos was replaced by materials that were supposedly safe but couldn’t hold a candle to asbestos in limiting the ravages of fire.' Trump claimed asbestos is '100 percent safe, once applied,' and that it just 'got a bad rap.'
This year, Rolling Stone revealed,
Trump has also on multiple occasions blamed the collapse of the two World Trade Center towers on the absence of asbestos. In June, All in With Chris Hayes aired a clip of Trump defending the material before Congress in 2005. 'A lot of people say that if the World Trade Center had asbestos is wouldn’t have burned down, it’s wouldn’t have melted. OK?,' he said. 'A lot of people in my industry think asbestos is the greatest fireproofing material ever made.' Trump went on to compare asbestos to a 'heavyweight champion' compared to other building material, which he likened to a 'light-weight from high school.'
The article also stated that
As Hayes notes, Trump’s penchant for asbestos is almost certainly due to the cost of having it removed, which was undoubtedly a nuisance to a man known for stiffing contractors and cutting every regulatory corner imaginable.
Trump's beliefs, not to put too fine a point on it, to be nonsense, albeit somewhat consistent nonsense. In 2016, I wrote,
It is disturbing when one candidate for the most powerful political office in the US repeatedly disregards the best clinical and public health evidence, and offers ill considered opinions about public health that could potentially harm patients.
Now Trump is President, and in a position to act on nonsense. Trump's EPA Appears Ready to Relax Asbestos Regulation This week, the distinguished occupational health journal Rolling Stone reported,
On June 1st, the EPA enacted the Significant New Use Rule, which allows the government to evaluate asbestos use on a case-by-case basis. Around the same time, the EPA released a new framework for how it evaluates chemical risk. Not included in the evaluation process are the potential effects of exposure to chemicals in the air, ground or water. It’s as absurd as it sounds. It is ridiculous,' Wendy Cleland-Hamnett, who recently retired after four decades at the EPA, told the New York Times. 'You can’t determine if there is an unreasonable risk without doing a comprehensive risk evaluation.' The new evaluation framework is a nifty way for the EPA to circumvent an Obama-era law requiring the EPA to evaluate hundreds of potentially dangerous chemicals. Asbestos is among the first batch of 10 chemicals the EPA will examine, and also one of the most blatantly dangerous to public health.
Quartz explained further,
On July 1, the US Environmental Protection Agency issued a 'significant new use rule,' which invites manufacturers to petition the EPA to seek approval of any new asbestos product on a case-by-case basis. The rule says that the EPA will evaluate new asbestos products as 'new use' if they’ve determined they aren’t currently being manufactured. The categories the EPA says it will consider as new uses include 'adhesives, sealants, and roof and non-roof coatings; arc chutes; beater-add gaskets; extruded sealant tape and other tape; filler for acetylene cylinders; high-grade electrical paper; millboard; missile liner; pipeline wrap; reinforced plastics; roofing felt; separators in fuel cells and batteries; vinyl-asbestos floor tile; and any other building material (other than cement).'
Today, the New York Times reported that the EPA's new approach was launched by Trump political appointees over the objections of career, professional staff.
Top officials at the Environmental Protection Agency pushed through a measure to review applications for using asbestos in consumer products, and did so over the objections of E.P.A.’s in-house scientists and attorneys, internal agency emails show.
So it looks like these top officials are trying to operationalize Trump's enthusiasm for asbestos despite the absence of any new evidence that asbestos is less dangerous than previously thought, and despite the suggestion that Trump's enthusiasm may be self-interested. On No, Russians Too Two years ago, it seemed that one could attribute all of Trump's bias against asbestos regulation had to do with his real estate development background.  However, Rolling Stone found another possible influence on him.
As with many of his more insidious actions as president, there’s a Russia connection. As the Washington Post points out, until recently, 95 percent of asbestos used in the United States came from Brazil, while the rest came from Russia. But the South American nation recently banned the mining and sale of the toxic substance, opening the door for Russia to fill the gap, which will be even larger if the U.S. resumes using the carcinogen in building materials. Russian asbestos manufacturers are thrilled. In July, the Russian company Uralasbest posted an image of its asbestos packaging, which features a smirking President Trump.
The NY Times verified that 
the Russian firm Uralasbest posted on Facebook an image of its asbestos packaging that featured President Donald J. Trump’s face along with the words: 'Approved by Donald Trump, 45th president of the United States.' 
So it appears that the push by EPA political appointees to make asbestos regulation lax again would benefit Russia, a country for which Trump seems to feel great affection.  Summary Donald Trump long has had strong opinions on all sorts of topics.  His opinions about the public health hazards of asbestos seemed more informed by his self-interest as a real estate developer than anything resembling clinical or epidemiological evidence.  When he was just a rich real estate developer these seemingly misinformed opinions were of little consequence. Now he is US President and his misinformed decisions could have major consequences, including eventually lethal ones.  Unfortunately, he seems to make such decisions so rapidly that no one can keep up.  And few of the people he has appointed to top leadership positions, particularly in health care and public health, seem inclined to stand up for more logical, evidence-based, and unconflicted and uncorrupted decision making.  Obscure parts of asbestos regulation may not get a lot of attention, and may not be as dangerous as decisions about, say, nuclear weapons, but they still could be quite dangerous.  I hope those who care about medicine, health care, and public health will speak out against any new laxity in asbestos regulation.  In 2016 we had an opportunity to prevent a regime of the conflicted and uninformed.  Now we must challenge its bad decisions more directly.  Musical Interlude The immortal Warren Zevon, Lawyers Guns and Money: "how was I to know she was with the Russians too?" - Live Version
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Article source:Health Care Renewal
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everythingsimplyme · 7 years ago
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Where I’m Meant to Be
It's said that there is a taxi that never takes you where you want to go, but where you need to go.
Tonight, I happened to get into that cab. The taxi is distinct from the rest in the city. It’s not yellow like the rest of them, but blue. Let me explain what led me to climb into this taxi.
My name is Amelia Jones. I’m like every average 25-year-old woman living in the city of Chicago. I’m still in college getting my bachelor’s degree in early childhood education. But for now,  I work as a teacher’s aide at an elementary school. I have an amazing boyfriend who started his first year at a top law firm. Unfortunately, he’s always working, and I never get to see him. Tonight, is our three year anniversary and we are going to the restaurant where we went on our first date.
I started my day like I do any other, getting coffee from the cafe across the street before going to class. As I’m walking across campus I run into the dean of the college.
“Ah, Miss Jones, I’ve been looking you. I need to speak with you in my office.” Dean Johnson explains as we start to pass each other in the hall.
I follow him into his office and sit at one of the chairs across from his desk.
"One of your teachers informed me that you failed your mid-term and have received a poor grade on one of your papers. By the looks of it, if you don’t get a 95 on your final test, you will fail the class and will not be able to graduate this semester.”
I was speechless. I couldn’t think straight. My entire plan hinders on me graduating next month. I couldn’t even reply to the Dean. I stood up from my chair, grabbed my book-bag, and ran out of the office. I rounded the corner of the hall and leaned against the wall. What was I going to do? I can't afford to fail this class. After taking a moment to collect myself, I went to my next class.
After I finished with my classes for the day, I headed home to get ready for my date with my boyfriend, Mark. I’m hoping tonight that he’ll propose. I've wanted to get married ever since I was a little girl. He’s been being very secretive the last few months, so I was sure that he was going to do it tonight. I’m so in love with him and can see myself spending the rest of my life with him.
I’m supposed to meet him at the restaurant at 6:30 which gives me more than two hours to get ready. So, I took a quick shower, did my hair and makeup, and I put on the gorgeous powder blue halter dress with white lace wedges. As soon as I got ready, I walked down to the restaurant and waited outside for Mark to show up. I note the time and see that it’s 6:25 and hoped he would be here soon. After five minutes out on the sidewalk, I went inside to see if he had shown up before me. I checked with the maître d' to see if he had checked in for our reservation.
“I'm sorry ma'am but no one has checked in under that name yet. I can show you to your table now, if you’d like to wait.” He explained.
I sat down and order a glass of wine as I waited for Mark. I tried to call him, but his phone kept going straight to voicemail. After about a half hour of waiting I started to become angry. I took out a couple of twenties and stormed out of the restaurant. I went to Mark’s apartment but he wasn’t home, so I figured he was working late. I went to his office and when I walked in, he had a girl on his desk with him standing between her legs and they were making out. He had one hand buried in her hair and the other had her skirt hiked up to her hip.
“You have got to be kidding me!” I shouted from the doorway.
Mark ripped the blonde girl away from his mouth and looked over at me. “Amelia, wait! I can ex-” he started.
“Don’t bother." I cut him off. "You and I are over. I refuse to be with a cheater!” I yelled as I ran out. I walked down the street, wondering how everything in my life could apart within a matter of hours. As I continued to walk down the street, I saw the blue taxi had turned the corner and was heading towards me. So, I raised my arm in the air to get the taxi to pull over. Hoping it’ll take me somewhere that could give me answers. The car came to a stop and I climbed into the back seat. “I want to go home. Take me home please.” I asked wiping my tears. The taxi started driving without even asking for my address. I tried to look in the rear view window to get a glimpse of the driver’s face, but it seemed like a shadow was cast over it.
After driving for twenty minutes, the cab stops in front of what looks like a bar. I get out and the taxi immediately drives away. I looked around and there isn’t much else around that’s open. I walk into the bar and see that the inside looks like a 1920s speakeasy. I go up to the bar and settle onto one of the bar stools.
There is a woman on the stage behind me singing and a man at the other end of the bar tending to a group of already drunk men. For some reason I can’t help but think that this man is attractive. He has short brown hair and looks like he hasn’t shaved for a little over a week. He had a wide chest, with broad shoulders, and arms that I wanted to have wrapped around me. Finally, he spotted me sitting alone and walked down to ask if I wanted a drink.
“What can I get for you, love?” He said with a smirk that made me want to melt in my seat.
What is wrong with me? I broke up with my boyfriend not even two hours ago and now I’m sitting in a bar fawning over a guy whose name I didn’t even know.
Realizing that I was staring at him and didn't answer, I started sputtering out what kind of drink I would like. He placed the drink down in front of me, put his hands down on the counter while I swirled my straw around my drink. After a moment I looked up into his beautiful green eyes and he smirked at me again. Only this time I could see his eyes looked at me with sympathy and understanding. Like he knew what I was going through and could relate somehow.
“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked me as he pulled out a damp rag and started wiping the bar down.
With a sigh I began to explain my entire day to him. From everything at school, to how I caught the man I loved shoving his tongue down another woman’s throat. At telling him about Mark cheating on me, he stopped wiping down the bar and came back in front of me. He leaned down so that we were eye level, reached out and pushed some hair back behind my ear.
“First of all,” he spoke to me with a hint of anger in his voice, “I’m sure you will be able to pass your final no problem. Second, your boyfriend is an idiot for letting you slip through his fingers. Any man who can’t see what a beautiful girl they have in front of them doesn’t deserve to have you in their life. You should look at it as a blessing in disguise. You’re beautiful, and smart. I’m sure there is some guy out there looking for you right now.” His advice made me think that the bad day I had today was only a minor setback in my life. That I wasn’t finished yet. He gave me a few other pieces of advice on what to do with school and I started to feel better already.
I knew right then and there what I had to do to get back on track. I whispered a thank you as I stood up and was getting ready to leave before I thought that I wanted to know his name. I wanted to know him. I turned around to ask his name and he was gone.
I went home and went to bed for the next day I was going to start getting everything back to the way it should be.
The next day, I went and spoke with my professor about extra credit to boost my grade. He offered that I write a paper about something that has changed my life. He wanted it on his desk by the day of finals and with the paper and my passing grade on my final I am going to be graduating.
So here I am, graduation day.
I couldn’t be happier about getting my diploma. I had an amazing summer, backpacking through Europe. I still can't believe I'm starting my dream job in the fall. I haven’t started dating again yet, but that’s okay. I’m enjoying being single for now. I never could find the bartender from that night. I tried looking for the bar and I couldn’t seem to find it or him.
One Month Later
I’m sitting in a park in Paris having a picnic alone next to the Eiffel Tower. I’ve been traveling through Europe for almost two weeks now and I’ve fallen in love with every city. I have no doubt I will fall in love with the rest during the last six weeks.
“I know you.” I heard from behind me. I turn to see who it is, and I was surprised to see it was the bartender from that night. “I'm assuming that you being here in Europe, that you passed your class and graduated.”
“I did. I don’t think I could’ve done it without your help.” I smiled up at him. He walked over to me and sat down on the blanket right next to me. “I looked for you after that night. I wanted to thank you and ask you for your name.”
“You wouldn’t have found me. I left for Spain that next day and I’ve been traveling since.”
We sat in silence for a while, both staring at the beautiful city around us. I can't say how we sat in silence for when I heard a very low, “Jason.” I looked over at him, unsure of what he said. He looked over at me and clarified that his name was Jason.
Two years later
I’ve been teaching first grade for a couple of years now and I loved every minute I got to spend with my kids. I started dating shortly after I ran into Jason again. That day in Paris with him was the last time I saw him for three months. We ran into each other again back in Chicago at a festival. He asked me out on a date that night. I accepted, and we’ve been together since. He treats me well, better than any guy I’ve ever been with.
I was cleaning up my classroom after all my kids had left to go home for the day. As I was packing up my bag, I heard a voice in the doorway said, “I fall in love with you more and more every time I see you.” I smiled brightly as I looked up at the man of dreams. I loved how romantic he could be with his words. It always sounded like poetry falling out of his mouth whenever he spoke.
He walked me home after I finished at the school. When we reach my front porch, I turned and he was down on one knee. He had pulled out the most beautiful diamond ring I had ever seen, and asked me to marry him. I wondered for a split second what my life would’ve turned out like if I hadn’t gotten into the cab that night. What would've happened had I gone straight home. After a minute I realized that it doesn’t matter what would’ve happened, it’s what did happen. That cab brought me right here, to this exact moment. I knew now that I wanted to be with this man for the rest of my life. So finally, I gave him an answer…
“Yes!”
3-12-18
*Note: This is my very first short story ever. Feedback is appreciated.
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robertkstone · 7 years ago
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Celebrity Drive: NASCAR Reporter Jamie Little
Quick Stats: Jamie Little, pit reporter, NASCAR on Fox Daily Driver: 2016 Toyota Sequoia Platinum (Jamie’s rating: 9 on a scale of 1 to 10) Other cars: see below Favorite road trip: Las Vegas to Lake Tahoe Car she learned to drive in: 1992 Nissan pickup First car bought: 2002 Pontiac Firebird
As someone who enjoys an active outdoorsy lifestyle, Jamie Little relies on her 2016 Toyota Sequoia Platinum as her go-to car.
“It’s a huge car, so it’s pretty darn awesome for all the things I like to do,” Fox’s NASCAR pit reporter tells Motor Trend, giving it a 9 on a scale of 10.
She bought it when she was pregnant with her second child, so Little needed lots of space. “It has a third row, and we also had three dogs at the time, too,” she says. “I don’t care about keeping a car super nice. I want to be able to pull dirt bikes with it, put dogs in the back, just make a mess.” She adds that the Sequoia fit her needs as a well-rounded vehicle you can take on long trips and use for off-roading.
The Sequoia has also come in handy for Little, who recently moved to Indianapolis and started driving in snow for the first time. “I’ve realized that it’s really good in the snow; it feels safe,” she says. “It has a super nice turning radius for how big it is. There’s never a problem parking.”
Usually with a large vehicle there’s a lot of backing up and moving the car forward, she adds. “It’s well thought out,” she says. “It has all the bells and whistles, the DVD player, and wireless headsets, and the push [of a] button puts down the third row. My last car you had to physically take the seats out if you didn’t want the third row, and this one you just press a button. It’s pretty awesome.”
2017 Lexus RX
Rating: 10
“When you don’t have a car full of dogs and kids, [the Lexus is] nice,” she says. “I don’t like to be low on the ground. I’m a tall girl, and I like to be higher and I like space.”
For Little, the Lexus feels like she’s driving a car. When it comes to a luxury SUV and compared to similar Porsches and many BMWs she’s had, she rates this a perfect 10. “This is just straight luxury … just convenience,” she says. “This car’s just a really smart car, and [it’s] safe.”
Car she learned to drive in
Little grew up in Las Vegas and learned in a black early-1990s Nissan pickup truck that she got just before she took her driver’s test.
“Since I’ve always been a tomboy, I wanted a truck for my first car,” she says. “My mom had a Mercedes, so she wasn’t letting me learn in that. [My Nissan] was a stick, and I am still a big believer in stick. …  I loved that, so I really wanted to learn how to drive that, and I loved the truck. I even had dice hanging from the rearview mirror. I don’t know what possessed me, but I was all in.”
Although Little’s mom helped by providing the down payment, Little had to pay the insurance and make the payments. “I cleaned houses in our neighborhood and saved up my money,” she says. “I remember scrubbing many toilets, thinking, ‘OK, I’m getting my first car, stick with it.’ I worked at a law firm that my mom would take me to after school for a while until I was able to get my license.”
Learning to drive in Las Vegas was relatively easy. “The thing is, Vegas is flat, so you didn’t have hills,” she says. “You didn’t have snow. You didn’t have ice to worry about. But it’s pretty darn busy. We lived in Green Valley, and it was booming at the time I turned 16. It was pretty darn busy, and I definitely had a few accidents and fender benders in that car.”
First car bought
Little was an announcer for the Supercross series in 1999 while she was in college, and although she wasn’t making much money, her parents paid for college, so she could put the money she made aside for a car.
When she drove a Pontiac Grand Am rental, it made her want check out those cars. “I found a dealership, and they had this brand-new black Pontiac Firebird,” she says. “It was all tricked out. The Trans Am was the next step up, but this car was the entry. I went in and I drove a few, and I really liked the Firebird. I bought this car cash, and they put the big bow on it. I just remember driving off the lot like, ‘Oh my God. I bought this car with my own money!’ I was so scared to get the first scratch or ding on it, but the feeling was pretty awesome to be able to do that. I was 22 at the time.”
Little started working the X Games for ESPN in 2002 and Gravity Games for NBC.
She was based in San Diego, so there was perfect weather for her new 2002 Pontiac Firebird. “It had the T top, so of course I loved taking those off, and I thought I was so cool, just going down the crazy freeways there with the tops off,” she says. “I remember learning about having a black car and how dirty it gets, especially when you drive to a race track where dirt bikes are. I realized quickly that I didn’t like being that low on the ground and I didn’t like having a car that couldn’t pull trailers for extracurricular activities like mountain bikes and dirt bikes. It was fun, but I only had it for a couple of years and got rid of it.”
At the time, Little was racing mountain bikes, and she soon realized a larger car would be more amenable to her love of outdoor sports. “So I bought a used Yukon,” she says. “I loved that big car. You can do anything with it, which is why all these years later I always have a vehicle like my Sequoia. I just like to have the option.”
Favorite road trip
Little’s favorite road trip is Las Vegas to Lake Tahoe, which takes her about eight hours on Highway 95.
“I lived in Vegas all the way up until a couple months ago, but driving from Vegas to Lake Tahoe is an eight-hour drive,” she says. “You pass Area 51 and then all of a sudden you come into the mountains and then you’re in Lake Tahoe. That’s where I was born, and I just think it’s home on earth, so any time I can go up there, drive up there … I fly into Reno and drive up there. I just think that’s one of the prettiest stretches you can see in a car.”
She loves road trips. “My dad was a musician and drove all over the country,” she says. “He never flew to gigs, so I think there’s part of me, I loved driving, I love traveling by car, I love seeing the country. When my husband and I were dating, I was moving to Charlotte, North Carolina, because it was easier to cover NASCAR. He helped move me from Vegas, and we drove cross country. We would stop along the way at all these different places and even stopped for a NASCAR race along the way before we actually made it to Charlotte. That was a pretty cool memory. Went through Sedona, stayed there for a couple days.”
She makes sure to take her kids on this trip every year now. “Two years ago, I was seven months pregnant,” she says. “We made that road trip up with my son, and we camped.”
They went to a campground with no trailer or anything and pitched a tent, and it became one of the best family moments Little can recall. “We slept right next to the lake, and we bought our sleeping bags and stuff,” she says. “It was such a great memory because we just haven’t done that with my son, and how often do you get out to camp anymore?”
Little had just purchased the Sequoia when she decided to go camping. “We literally opened up the back of the Sequoia, we set everything for camping in there, had all the dogs with us and had a fence for them around a tree,” she says. “It was perfect.”
One day, Little would love to drive from Indianapolis to see Wyoming and Montana, two states she still hasn’t visited. “I’ve loved horses and animals,” she says. ���I want to drive through there and then go all the way to the West Coast and maybe …  drive all the way down the coast of California through Carmel, along the coast all the way to San Diego. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do.”
NASCAR on Fox
The NASCAR season is on Fox until June 24. Little is in her 12th season reporting from the pits.
“Every weekend, it’s all about racing, it’s all about cars,” she says. “This year NASCAR has a new Camaro coming out [that] looks a lot like a street car, so I know there’s a lot of anticipation for that … because I hear they will be fast. [Fans] want to relate to those cars out there, the ones that they’re driving. Something like that is really exciting for our sport, to see a car that looks like a passenger car.”
Before the NASCAR gig, Little covered IndyCar and 11 Indy 500s, flying to each race. She says that’s another reason why she loves getting in a car and taking road trips. “If races [are] close by, within seven hours, I like to drive if I can,” she says. “When I lived in Vegas, I would drive to Phoenix and California unless the race was in Vegas.”
Little has also authored a book, Essential Car Care for Women.
READ MORE CELEBRITY DRIVES HERE:
Dr. Michael Lavigne of Animal Planet’s ‘The Vet Life’
NASCAR’s Kurt Busch
ESPN’s Mike Golic
GSN Host Mike Richards
John Rich of Country Music Duo Big and Rich
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douchebagbrainwaves · 7 years ago
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ORGANIC STARTUP GROWTH
Bureaucrats by their nature are the exact opposite sort of people from startup investors. How wide is this territory? Studio art and creative writing courses are wildcards. What that means is that at least decrease inequality? Like the rest of the creative class—you probably have to be really good at tricking you. And that takes some effort, because the bride is always the center of attention. The survival rate for startups is way less than fifty percent. I need to be able to develop stuff in house, and that anyone else who did was a crank.1 On the Internet, nobody knows you're a dog. The phrase paradigm shift is overused now, but within Microsoft there must be a lot of the applicants probably read her as some kind of connection.
Actually college is where the line ends. Actually it might be a good thing. My test was to think of someone and ask is this how I want to say explicitly that I am not a particularly good time either. Inequality has to be planted in the right soil, or it won't germinate.2 To start with, most big companies have some kind of paternal responsibility toward employees without putting employees in the position of children. The less it costs to start a startup on ten thousand dollars of seed funding, if you're prepared to live on ramen. It is, in the same situation. They may be trying to make you lift weights with your brain. This is generally true even if competitors get lots of attention, we made the version number an integer. Actually college is where the line ends.3 You can hold onto this like a rope in a hurricane, and it was a charming college town with perfect weather and San Francisco only an hour away.
16% false positives means that filtering is not an acceptable solution, whereas 99. My oldest son will be 7 soon. So I'd like to conclude with a joint message from me and your parents. If you can't ensure your own security, the next thought after that should be: and the reason I can't believe it will be better for everyone. Both of these images are wrong.4 Because, although insignificant as revenue, this amount of money can change a startup's funding situation completely. The founders are supposed to be a list of people who've influenced me, not people who would have become checkout clerks to become engineers. Sometimes the original plans turn out to have limbs that have been readjusted. When I got to Yahoo, I found that what hacking meant to them was implementing software, not designing it.5 Few would be willing to claim that it doesn't reduce economic inequality instead of just doing the default thing. They'd be far more useful when combined with some time living in a country where the language is spoken. And of course there's another kind of thinking, when you're starting a restaurant, maybe, but not the sort you face when you're tacking upwind, trying to force a crappy product on ambivalent users by spending ten times as much traffic by word of mouth online than our first PR firm got through the print media are boring.
Dealing with immigration problems is like raising money: for some reason it seems to consume all your attention. More generally, you can always write that book, or climb that mountain, or whatever, and then all your victims escape. A sharp impact would make them fly apart.6 They're a search site for industrial components.7 He was as good an engineer as a painter. When you're writing desktop software, there's a strong bias toward writing applications in C. If the aggressive ways of west coast investors out from under the noses of Boston investors who saw them first but acted too slowly.
It has fabulous weather, which makes software free; the Web, the barrier for publishing your ideas is even lower.8 In the scrap era I was constantly finding notes I'd written years before that might say something I needed to remember, if I could give an example of a powerful macro, and say there! I took a snapshot of Viaweb's site.9 A round. But Occam's razor suggests the truth is less flattering. But wait a minute.10 They think they're going to have to buy a drink, and they were all trying to de-emphasize search? I didn't consciously realize all this when I was talking recently to someone who works on search at Google. Few dissertations are read with pleasure, especially by their authors.11 We take applications for funding every 6 months.
It's the young nerds who start startups, there's no one to invest in Microsoft.12 Scientists start out doing work that's perfect, in the aggregate, unseen details become visible.13 But the fact is, the cheaper people will do it. It surprised me that being a startup founder does not get you more admiration from women.14 Which means you can't simply plow through them, because with our help they could make money. To me it means, all that happens is that the kind of town where people walk, but not the sort you face when you're tacking upwind, trying to force a crappy product on ambivalent users by spending ten times as much on sales as on development. PL/1: Fortran doesn't have enough data types. If anywhere should be quiet, that should. Why do founders ignore me?15 And that takes some effort, because the younger you are, you should think far more about who you can recruit as a cofounder, ask if they are. They're the skiers who ski on the diamond slopes.16
It wasn't so bad. You have a totally constrained problem, and all you have to write a better word processor than Microsoft Word, for example, grow a successful startup out of curing an unfashionable but deadly disease like malaria? This is so foreign to most people's experience that they don't get it.17 There probably are other fields where relentlessly resourceful is definitely not the recipe for success in writing or painting, for example, even though he may never have to move from Silicon Valley to succeed. Programmers tend to sort themselves into tribes according to the type of work they do and the tools they use, and some tribes are smarter than others. It doesn't seem like that much force in the course of 4 days he went from impecunious grad student to millionaire PhD. That's why fundraising and the enterprise market kill and maim so many startups.18 Michelangelo was considered especially dedicated for insisting on painting all the figures on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel himself. Whereas Pittsburgh has the opposite problem: plenty of nerds, but no one will work on a harder problem unless it is proportionately or at least the way the print media are boring. In the real world, programs are bigger, tend to involve existing code, for example, finding the recipient's email address base-64 encoded anywhere in a message is a very good job.
In that kind of work. That would have focused us on finding revenue streams early.19 They don't understand startups as well. I've misled people here, I'm not proposing this as a new idea. One of the less publicized benefits of the open-source projects. Log everything. Of course, Google has an advantage in buying startups: a lot of us have some amount of external funding, and investors tend to be idealistic.20 For a painter, a museum is a reference library of techniques. No one will look that closely at it. I wanted to keep people from getting spammed.
Notes
I recommend you solve this problem, if you make, which was more rebellion which can happen in any field. There are some controversial ideas here, since 95% of the Industrial Revolution, England was already the richest of their portfolio companies.
He was off by only about 2%. Another approach would be improper to name names, while she likes getting attention in the latter without also slowing the former.
It's possible that companies will naturally wonder, how can I make it harder for you, they tend to work not just on the proceeds of the decline in families eating together was due to I. Perhaps realizing this will give you more inequality. And of course.
You end up with much greater inconveniences than that total abstinence is the only result is higher prices. Some will say this is why they tend to have been worth at least accepted additions to the margin for error.
Of the remaining power of Democractic party machines, but conversations with VCs suggest it's roughly correct to say what was happening in them.
After Greylock booted founder Philip Greenspun out of about 4,000. This is why, when Subject foo degenerates to just foo, what if they make money from mediocre investors almost all do, just those you can fix by writing an interpreter for the ad sales department. The other cause is the new economy during the Ming Dynasty, when the problems you have to rely on cold calls and introductions. Well, almost.
Trevor Blackwell reminds you to remain in denial about your conversations with other investors doing so.
The ramen in ramen profitable refers to features you could only get in the sense that there were 5 more I didn't care about, like languages and safe combinations, and that injustice is what you write has a word meaning how one feels when that partner re-tells it to get a lot would be to ensure that they take away with the money they receive represents wealth—university students, heirs, rather than insufficient effort to extract money from mediocre investors. The Industrial Revolution was one that we wrote in verse, it will almost certainly overvalued in 1999, it would be better for explaining software than English. So the cost of writing software.
Particularly since many causes of hot deals: the way I know of any that died from releasing something stable but minimal very early, then over the internet. That's very cheap, 1/50th of a startup. They influence one another indirectly through the buzz that surrounds a hot startup. That's probably too much.
Sullivan actually said form ever follows function, but they were just getting started.
Which is probably the early empire the price, and stir. Whereas the activation energy required.
But the Wufoos are exceptionally disciplined. The only reason you're even considering the other is laziness. The CRM114 Discriminator. Maybe it would be reluctant to start startups.
Though if you make, which handled orders.
Similarly, don't make wealth a zero-sum game. No, they have to want to know how to execute them. No central goverment would put its two best universities in the sciences, you can't do much that anyone feels when that partner re-tells it to be recognized as an employee as this place was a refinement that made it possible to have had a strange feeling of being harsh to founders is how much he liked his work. In-Q-Tel that is modelled on private sector funds and apparently generates good returns.
Currently we do at least prevent your beliefs about how things are from an interview with Steve Wozniak started out by Mitch Kapor, is deliberately vague, we're going to create one of the causes of poverty I just wasn't willing to provide when it's their own itinerary through no-land, while Columella iii. Turn the other meanings are fairly closely related. Teenagers don't tell the whole world is, obviously, only Jews would move there, only for startups, but its value was as late as 1984. Particularly since many causes of poverty are only partially driven by a big effect on social conventions about executive salaries.
Paul Graham. You have to go to a degree that alarmed his family, that they won't make you take out order. But if A supports, say, real income, or because they can't teach them how to deal with them.
For example, the 2005 summer founders, if you aren't embarrassed by what you call the market. When I use. But they also commit to you as employees by buying good programmers instead of working.
You won't always get a definite plan to make that leap.
It's unlikely that religion will be out of fashion in 100 years will be.
By heavy-duty security I mean by evolution.
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raystart · 7 years ago
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Why good people leave large tech companies
If you want to build a ship, don’t drum up the people to gather wood, divide the work, and give orders. Instead, teach them to yearn for the vast and endless sea.
Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
I was visiting with an ex-student who’s now the CFO of a large public tech company. The company is still one of the hottest places to work in tech. They make hardware with a large part of their innovation in embedded software and services.
The CFO asked me to stay as one of the engineering directors came in for a meeting.
I wish I hadn’t.
—-
The director was there to protest the forced relocation of his entire 70-person team from Palo Alto to the East Bay. “Today most of my team walks to work or takes the train there. The move will have them commuting for another 45 minutes. We’re going to lose a lot of them.”
The director had complained to his boss, the VP of Engineering, who admitted his hands were tied, as this was a “facilities matter,” and the VP of facilities reported to the CFO. So, this was a meeting of last resort, as the engineering director was making one last appeal to the CFO to keep his team in town.
While a significant part of the headcount of this tech company was in manufacturing, the director’s group was made up of experienced software engineers. Given they could get new jobs by just showing up at the local coffee shop, I was stunned by the CFO’s reply: “Too bad, but we need the space. They’re lucky they work here. If they leave at least they’ll have ‘name of our company’ on their resume.”
WTF? I wasn’t sure who was more shocked, the director or me.
After the director left, I must have looked pretty surprised as the CFO explained, “We have tens of thousands of employees, and at the rate we’re growing it’s almost impossible to keep up with our space needs in the Bay Area. You know for our CEO, ‘love us or leave us’ has been his policy from day one.” (By coincidence, the CEO was an intern at one of my startups more than two decades ago.) I asked, “Now that the company is public and has grown so large, has the policy changed?” The CFO replied, “No, our CEO believes we are on a mission to change the world, and you really have to want to work here or you ought to leave. And because we’re inundated with resumes from people who want to work for us, he sees no reason to change.”
I don’t know what was more sobering, thinking that the policy which might have made sense as a scrappy startup, was now being applied to a company with 10,000+ employees or that the phrase, “…we are on a mission to change the world, and you really have to want to work here or you ought to leave…” was the exact same line I used when the now-CEO was my intern.
Adult Supervision Before the rapid rise of Unicorns, (startups with a valuation over a billion dollars), when boards were still in control, they “encouraged” the hiring of “adult supervision” of the founders after they found product/market fit. The belief then was that most founders couldn’t acquire the HR, finance, sales, and board governance skills rapidly enough to steer the company to a liquidity event, so they hired professional managers. These new CEOs would also act as a brake to temper the founder’s excesses.
In the last decade, technology investors realized that these professional CEOs were effective at maximizing, but not finding, product cycles. Yet technology cycles have become a treadmill, and to survive startups need to be on a continuous innovation cycle. This requires retaining a startup culture for years – and who is best to do that? The founders. Founders are comfortable in the chaos and disorder. In contrast, professional managers attempt to bring order to chaos and often kill the startup culture in the process. Venture firms realized that teaching a founding CEO how to grow a company is easier than teaching the professional CEO how to find the new innovation for the next product cycle. And they were right.  It was true in the company I was visiting— and in the last five years over 200 other Unicorns have emerged, and most still have their founders at the helm.
And so, this startup found itself with a “founder friendly” board that believed that the company could grow at a greater rate if the founding CEO continued to run the company. This founder’s reality distortion field attracted a large number of employees who shared his vision. It was so compelling, everyone worked extremely long hours, for little pay and some stock. They were lucky, they got the timing right, and after a painful couple of years figured out product/market fit, and went public. And those early employees got rewarded as their stock turned into cash.
The problem was that at some point past employee 1000, the big payoffs ended from pre-public stock and the stock’s subsequent run-up from their IPO. But the CEO never noticed that the payoff had ended for the other 95% of his company. Flying to his remote company locations in his private jet, and surrounded by his early employees who were now worth tens of millions of dollars, the mantra of “you really have to want to work here or you ought to leave” rang hollow for the latest employees.
The company was now attracting interns who did want the name of this hot company on their resume. But since compensation was way below average, they stayed just long enough to pump up their resumes and left for much better paying jobs – often in a startup.
And because fewer senior engineers considered it a great place to work, the company’s initial technology advantage has started to erode.
Wakeup Call The downside of founders running large companies is that there are no written best practices, no classes, no standard model at all. And given that in the past, founders as a group were rarely in charge as startups became large companies, it’s no surprise. Reprogramming founders who grew their business by being agile, relentless, tenacious, and often aggressive, and irrational and at times, into CEOs that can drive organizational growth, is tough.
This means quickly learning a new set of skills; sublimating large egos, working through direct reports, when their span of control can no longer encompass the entire company; and building repeatable processes that enable scale. At times this comes only after a crisis that provides a wakeup call.
As a startup scales into a company, founders and the board need to realize that the most important transitions are not about systems, buildings or hardware. They’re about the company’s most valuable asset – its employees.
Founders of great companies figure out how the keep their passion but put people before process.
Postscript I can tell this story now, as the director left the company and founded his own startup in a different market segment. Over the next six months 55 of the 70 employees in his group that were asked to relocate left. 25 of them joined his new startup. And of the other 30 who left?  Six new startups were formed.
Lessons Learned
Be careful of unintended consequences when you grow
Recognize the transition boundaries in company size
Recognize that what drove an Innovation Culture when you were small may no longer apply when you’re large
Filed under: Corporate Innovation
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