#finding chloe and aubrey was fully an accident
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rai-knightshade-art · 2 years ago
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"When I see your face... There's not a thing that I would change, cause you're amazing, just the way you are (So I travelled back, down that road, will she come back, no one knows...)"
Pool Mashup (Just The Way You Are/Only Just a Dream), from Pitch Perfect
"I can't say it, so I'll sing it"
Pitch Perfect RarePair Week Prompt #7
Listen to the Bonus (Chaubrey-themed) Playlist Here!
They're back, Pitches! As promised, here is part 2 to the Chaubrey drawing I posted for Day 2 (which you can find here!), aka the Bonus Post for today's prompt! That's right, folks, today I'm bringing you TWO rarepairs for the price of one! (Or, well, technically three if you count the Jeca nods in this one, but they got their own pair of days so we're letting the others shine here!)
As I mentioned in the first post, the background Chaubrey storyline from my little pocket AU is that they get together over the course of planning Beca and Jesse's wedding, culminating in them finally revealing their feelings to each other at the wedding reception. This is the moment that all is revealed! The Bellas collectively decided to do a reprise of that iconic original mashup from the empty Barden pool as one of their performances for the reception, with Aubrey and Chloe taking the leads once again (and with everyone wearing their Bella scarves on their left wrists in honor of Beca 🥺). And what a perfect song choice for the pair of them! 🥺🥺 This is THE Chaubrey song for me tbh, so you know I had to give this to them! Then, after the performance is over and they've given each other enough heart eyes to give an elephant diabetes, they sneak off to actually talk and verbally confirm that, yep, I was singing that to you babe, turns out I'm super into red heads, who knew???
And then they definitely get caught making out 20 minutes later 😂 Fat Amy is gonna be telling that story for years to come (including at their wedding a year later, because Chloe definitely caught the bouquet and, well, sometimes the universe gives you a sign and, who are they to deny the universe something?)
I hope you guys have enjoyed all my entries for this week (and appreciate the double dose of my favorite pair of girlfriends!), and I hope you guys like the other final entry, which you can find here!
Close ups, the list of all my entries, and the full page with both Chaubrey scenes can be found below the cut, and as always the Image ID is in the alt text!
The Full Page:
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The Close Ups:
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Days I'm participating in (and all the Entries I've posted):
Day 1 (this is me trying): Link
Day 2 (I've missed you): Link
Day 5 (if honesty means telling the truth... Well then the truth is I'm still in love with you): Link
Day 6 (there's no way it's not happening with you looking at me like that): Link
Day 7.1 (I can't say it, so I'll sing it): You Are Here!
Day 7.2 (part 2): Link
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Angst timmmmme!! The last part of three parts on Chloe’s accident:
Part One: Day 14 - Hear Our Prayer || Part Two: Day 18 - Grievous Injury
Also on AO3!!!
DAY TWENTY ONE: REMINISCIENCE
Tests confirmed what the doctors thought; Chloe had suffered damage to the area of her brain linked to speech and language. No-one had any idea what the extent of the damage would be or how long it would take Chloe to recover, if she would recover at all. There was a chance that Chloe might never fully regain control of her voice.
Beca had finally been persuaded by Aubrey and a stammering Chloe to go home for a little while, to shower and get some decent sleep for a change. Beca was gone less than five hours much to Aubrey’s protest, but it was as much time as Beca could bear to be away from her wife when she was in the hospital like this. 
It was a week before Chloe was discharged from the hospital, Beca by her side as she limped back into their home on crutches and settled her onto the sofa she had pulled out into a bed; it was too much for Chloe to attempt the stairs right now and there was a bathroom downstairs that she could use without having to worry. 
“W-What... n-n-now?” Chloe asked as Beca sat next to her, gently moving her hair from her face.
“Now you get some rest.” Beca smiled softly, “And tomorrow you’ve got that speech therapy guy coming so we can start to work on things. You’ll be back to normal in no time.”
“If... n-n-not?” Chloe’s eyes glittered with insecurity as Beca caressed her cheek, “Wh-Wh-What t-then?”
“Then I will still be here.” Beca promised her, lifting her hand and pressing a soft kiss to the back of it, “And we’ll work it out, we’ll figure something out like we always do.”
“D-D-Don’t w-want t-t-t-” Chloe frowned deeply as Beca wiped away the tear that ran down her cheek with her thumb, “T-T-”
“It’s okay.” Beca could see Chloe getting more and more worked up and sought to soothe, “Take a deep breath, give it a second, and try again. The doctor said that sometimes if you get worked up it’s harder for you to get your words out.”
Chloe swallowed thickly, nodding a little as she closed her eyes for a moment, concentrating hard, “D-Don’t want... t-t-to be... l-like t-this f-f-forever...”
She opened her eyes again to find Beca looking at her with so much love and concern and longing, all of it unconditional, and that made her cry. Because she would never understand what she did to deserve Beca, what she did to be looked at like that, why Beca didn’t just run a mile now that things looked dire. She couldn’t tell her any of this either because her stupid brain was messed up. Chloe hated this.
“I know.” Beca pressed a gentle kiss to Chloe’s forehead, “And we’re going to fight like hell to change things Chlo, I’ll be right here to help you like always.”
-----
“F-F-FUCK THIS!”
Beca ducked as Chloe threw a mug past her head, wincing as she heard it smash against the wall behind her. It had been a frustrating month for Chloe, she’d begun to get a handle on full sentences again, but almost every word was still a struggle for her to get out. It had made her angry and sullen, withdrawing from Beca and Aubrey and the other Bellas, spending most of her time holed up in the bedroom now that her leg had healed well enough for her to use the stairs.
It broke Beca’s heart to see her like this, it was so far removed from the Chloe she had fallen in love with, so far from the Chloe she knew she was, but Beca understood it. Of course she was frustrated, she felt like she couldn’t communicate properly, she couldn’t speak in the way she wanted to, when she wanted to. Anyone would be frustrated and angry.
“Chloe...” Beca sighed softly taking her hand only to have it snatched away again, “It’s okay, just take your time or use the whiteboard-”
“I D-DON’T W-W-W- WANT... TO U-U-USE THE D-DAMN W-W-WHITE... B-B-BOARD!”
Chloe’s face was covered in angry tears, red and flushed as she glared at Beca, “I- I- I W-WANT TO BE N-N-NORMAL AGAIN!”
“I know.” Beca ran a hand through her hair, “I know Chloe. You’re getting better, I know it’s taking longer than you want, but you are getting better Chloe.”
“It d-d-doesn’t feel like it...” Chloe had stopped yelling as she drooped back into her pillows, tears still flowing as she let Beca take her hand, “I j-j-just want t-to b-be able t-t-to ask y-y-y-you a-a-about your d-day w-w-without i-i-it t-t-taking an h-h-hour.”
“I wish I could fix this for you.” Beca’s brow furrowed as she squeezed Chloe’s hand, “I don’t mind if it takes you an hour, or three, or all night, I just want to listen to you talk Chlo.”
“I’m n-n-not t-talking t-though...” Chloe whimpered, “J-Just b-b-butchering s-s-sentences.”
“It’s more than I thought I was going to get.” Beca pursed her lips a little, “When I watched them wheel you off in the ER Chloe I-” She shook her head as she pushed back tears, “I will take whatever you have, whatever you can manage, I don’t care if it takes you ages to finish a sentence, I’m just so grateful that I still have you...”
Chloe cupped Beca’s cheek in her free hand, feeling guilt start to swamp her. Beca was trying so hard for her, and here she was yelling at her and throwing mugs at her head. She deserved better than this.
“I’m s-s-sorry.” Chloe mumbled.
“It’s okay.” Beca turned her head and pressed a kiss to Chloe’s palm, “I get it, you’re frustrated, and you’re tired, and you’re angry at this whole bullshit situation.”
“It’s n-n-not f-f-fair of m-me to t-t-take it o-out on y-you...” Chloe shook her head, sighing heavily.
“Y’know...” Beca sniffed a little as she saw the way that Chloe was withdrawing inwards again. Sure it sucked when she yelled at her, but it was even worse when she shut herself off entirely, “I was reading that singing can help with speech therapy. Do you want to try that?”
Chloe turned to look at Beca again, “S-s-singing?”
“Yeah.” Beca nodded, grinning broadly, “I didn’t understand the science of it, but apparently it uses slightly different part of your brain or something and it helps to stimulate the part that’s working slowly or something.”
“Huh.” Chloe sniffled as she wiped at her cheeks, “B-B-But w-what if I c-can’t?”
“Then we don’t have to do it.” Beca shrugged a little, “But it can’t hurt to try right?”
Chloe nodded a little, looking a little unsure still. Beca took her other hand, giving them both a soft squeeze before she started to sing to Chloe.
“You shout it out, but I can't hear a word you say... I'm talking loud, not saying much. I'm criticized, but all your bullets ricochet... shoot me down, but I get up...”
Chloe grinned tearfully as Beca sang, her heart warming a little. Beca was so good to her, she always had been, ever since they’d met Beca had always had her back.
“I’m b-b-b-b-” Chloe bit her lip, frustration creasing her features, Beca kissing the back of her hand as she stood up.
“I want to try something.” She smiled warmly at Chloe, “Do you trust me?”
Chloe nodded. Of course she did. There was no-one she trusted like Beca.
Beca moved away and came back with a scarf, encouraging Chloe to sit forward a little before tying it around her head, covering her eyes.
“B-B-Beca?”
“I want you focus on the music.” Beca’s voice came from in front of her as Chloe felt the bed shift with her weight, her hands in hers again, “Nothing else. Just the sound of me singing, okay?”
Chloe nodded again.
“You shout it out, but I can't hear a word you say... I'm talking loud, not saying much. I'm criticized, but all your bullets ricochet... shoot me down, but I get up...”
Chloe loved the sound of Beca’s voice, it wrapped around her like a warm hug, it comforted her in a way she could never explain even if she was able to speak properly.
“I'm b-b-bulletproof, nothing to l-l-lose... fire away, f-fire away. R-R-Ricochet, you take y-your aim... fire away, fire away.”
Beca grinned broadly as she heard Chloe’s voice slowly lose its shaky quality. She could feel the excitement rolling off Chloe too, heart swelling to see the smile on her face too.
“You shoot me down, but I won't fall... I am titanium. You shoot me down, but I won't fall... I am titanium.”
Beca and Chloe sang together in the same way they had the first time, when Beca had found her privacy very suddenly invaded by the girl with flame red hair and brilliant blue eyes she’d met only briefly the day before. It meant something different this time, it was slower, (mostly due to Chloe’s limitations) more emotional, more loaded, but it still belonged to them and bound them in a moment that no-one else would ever understand.
“I d-did it...” Chloe breathed, Beca lifting the blindfold before pressing a kiss to Chloe’s lips.
“You did.” Beca nodded, “I’m so proud of you Chlo, you sounded so good.”
“Thank y-you.” Chloe mumbled, gently pulling Beca into her arms, Beca easily slotting next to her as she embraced Chloe, “S-s-singing with y-y-you has always b-b-been my s-saving g-g-grace.”
“It’s my favourite thing to do.” Beca shrugged a little, gently pressing soft kisses into Chloe’s neck, “Every time we did, that we do, it’s like hitting a reset button in my head, everything bad just melts away...”
“M-me t-t-too.” Chloe held Beca tighter, “I love you.”
Beca lifted her head a little, grinning tearfully at Chloe, “Chlo... you haven’t been able to say that without stumbling a little since the accident...”
“I k-k-know.” Chloe pressed herself into Beca, “I m-made the t-therapist h-h-help me n-nail that f-f-first. It’s t-the m-most i-important thing f-for m-me t-t-too say.”
“I love you so much.” Beca shook her head a little, kissing Chloe, “We’ll sing our way through this Chloe, it’s worked for every other problem we’ve ever had, why not this one too?”
Chloe giggled as she shook her head a little, “D-Dork. I c-c-can l-live with th-that.”
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beca-mitchell · 5 years ago
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what remains of our love (2/10)
ch. 1 | ch. 2 | ch. 3 | ch. 4 | ch. 5 | ch. 6 | ch. 7 | ch. 8 | ch. 9 | ch. 10
Read on AO3.
“What are you doing here?” Chloe asks immediately upon seeing a familiar head of blonde curls. “You can’t possibly have work-related things to discuss.”
The disdain seeps into her voice naturally. It’s something that can’t be helped because Beca’s publicist has been an absolute nightmare and has been hellbent on keeping as much of this under wraps as possible.
“Actually, I do,” Valerie says, having the decency to at least look sheepish. “We do kind of have to release another statement since she’s awake.”
“We don’t need to do that right now,” Chloe says, brushing past her.
“There are hounds out there, Chloe,” Valerie hisses. “We need to throw them a bone so they leave her alone. So they leave you alone.”
“This is none of their business,” Chloe cries, finally whirling on Beca’s publicist. “And you can tell Greg ,” she sneers his name. Beca’s manager. “That if he thinks he’s pushing out Beca’s single without her consent, he’s got another thing coming. She doesn’t need more media. Let them beg for scraps. She is my fiancée, not the rest of the world’s.”
––––––
“Beca, your fame could really expand further out if we kind of.” He clasps his hands delicately beneath his chin. “If we...painted the illusion of you being available.”
Chloe would vomit all over him if she could. Where’s Aubrey when she needs her?
“But I’m not…‘available’,” Beca says slowly, raising an eyebrow. “Very obviously not ‘available’,” she repeats, stressing the word with disdain in her tone.
“Just think of the–”
“Please stop insulting my relationship,” Beca says, quieter than before, in a deadly calm tone. “Chloe means the world to me and though this might ‘help’ me as you say, Chloe is the one person I trust more than anybody and I would rather not have you offer me an opportunity to hide my relationship with her when she’s sitting right here.”
Chloe says nothing, knowing that Beca needs this moment - that Beca needs to draw her own strength. Her heart thuds painfully in her chest, wondering whether it was ever an option for Beca.
For Beca to not choose her.
“It’s not an option,” Beca continues, as if reading the depths of Chloe’s thoughts. “Chloe never was just an option for me.”
In the years Chloe has known Beca, that is as much a declaration of true and unadulterated love from Beca Mitchell.
“I love her and I’m in love with her,” Beca says, powering past his attempts to speak.
And then there’s that – something new for Chloe to get used to. This romantic and unashamed side of Beca Mitchell. Pure and free – just something for her to call her own, just as much as she gives herself entirely to Beca as well.
––––––
Beca fades in and out of consciousness over the next two days. That alone is more terrifying to Chloe than when Beca had been unconscious for two weeks, or when Beca had woken up with a gasp.
It’s the vacant expression in her eyes whenever they do flutter open. Chloe sees her favorite shade of blue for only a moment before Beca’s heart rate spikes and she’s fading again.
Chloe isn’t sure she has been able to stop crying long enough to let the swelling in her eyes and cheeks go down, so she definitely looks horrific. She refuses to leave Beca’s side for too long a period, determined to be there when she wakes up and is finally coherent enough to speak full sentences.
She misses her voice.
Aubrey brings her files from work along with a couple changes of her clothes. Chloe manages to schedule in a few appointments for the next week, feeling mildly ashamed about how much work she’s been putting off over the past couple of weeks.
She’s gently rubbing her thumb over the back of Beca’s hand and her knuckles while reading through a file - a new potential patient, a ten year old boy with severe anxiety and PTSD - when Beca wakes up.
Chloe feels the change in the room before she realizes what’s happening.
“Beca,” she murmurs, looking up. She quickly flips the manila folder closed and places it on her chair as she stands. “Bec,” she repeats, tears welling up in her eyes. “You’re awake,” she says, all while looking straight into Beca’s eyes - sleepy, but alert.
Beca’s jaw works for a few moments and Chloe can see her throat moving. She steps closer to her head, gently smoothing the skin on the back of Beca’s hand. “Take your time,” she reassures.
Beca blinks through the haze of drugs and pain, trying to focus on Chloe’s voice. It’s Chloe’s voice - that much she knows, even if her brain feels muddled and uncertain. “Water,” she finally manages to rasp. “Please,” she adds as an afterthought. The act of speaking is enough to make her want to close her eyes again, but she forces herself to stay present, mostly curious about the delicate way in which Chloe had been stroking her hand.
“Water,” Chloe repeats. She nods to herself, finally leaving Beca’s side to grab a plastic cup and the pitcher off the trolley in the corner. When she turns back around, Beca is even more alert than before and attempting to sit up. “Hey,” she calls, rushing back over. She quickly places a steadying hand on Beca’s shoulder. “I’m going to call a nurse to help you sit up okay?” She places the cup on Beca’s bedside table before she presses the call button.
Beca looks like she might want to protest. The immediate furrow of her brow is so familiar and comforting that Chloe almost smiles. She would smile if the situation weren’t so dire.
Beca’s eyes remain locked on Chloe even as the nurse bustles around Beca, checking her vitals
Chloe feels so much love and affection in her heart - the familiarity of Beca looking to her as an anchor of support. Chloe clasps her hands together, waiting as patiently as she can. When the nurse reaches for the cup of water, Chloe puts her hand out finally, smiling apologetically. “I can do that,” she says softly. “Can we have some time alone?”
The nurse smiles, recognizing her. “Of course,” he mumbles, nearly bowing out of the room. “I’ll just go get Doctor Gibson.”
Chloe fusses with the edge of Beca’s blanket for a moment and turns to get the water. “Sorry,” she murmurs, apologizing for the wait. “Here, you must be parched.”
“I...am,” Beca admits, eyes still tracking Chloe’s movements with interest. She lets Chloe tilt some water into her mouth, swallowing with a little difficulty. Chloe waits while Beca adjusts to the cool liquid sliding down her throat. Chloe moves to help her again, but Beca puts a hand out, eyebrows knitting together slightly. “I can – I can do it. Thanks, Chloe,” she says, offering the briefest smile.
There’s something oddly detached about the way Beca says her name. The very barest hint of uncertainty. The way Beca says it with disconnect and unfamiliarity.
Chloe tries not to dwell, instead choosing to focus on the fact that Beca is awake and speaking to her.
“I’m so glad you’re safe,” Chloe murmurs, filing the silence while Beca sips at her water. She reaches out, brushing her fingers through Beca’s hair.
Beca jolts as if shocked and nearly spills the cup of water all over herself. “Why–” she hastily puts her cup to the side. “What are you doing?”
Chloe pauses. Her fingers linger for a moment before she processes what Beca just asked.
“What?” she asks, unsure if she heard Beca correctly.
Before Beca can respond, they’re both interrupted by Doctor Gibson entering the room. He looks between them with concern, perhaps sensing the tense atmosphere.
“How are we doing today, Ms. Mitchell?”
Beca blinks, sparing Chloe a second, mildly concerned expression before she tilts her head at the doctor. “Like I just got hit by a truck,” Beca says dryly.
“So you remember what happened,” he notes, not missing a beat.
Chloe figures that by the way Beca’s eyes widen, it’s not quite what she expected. “Was...I?” she asks, glancing at Chloe briefly.
Chloe is still reeling from the shock of Beca denying her touch. She can’t exactly process what Beca is asking her - whether Beca is actually asking her to confirm that she was in fact hit by a truck. She feels her legs tremble a little and wonders if she can just sit–
“You’ve been in and out for almost a month,” the doctor says gently. “I know it’s probably a shock, but –”
“–A month?”
Chloe feels lightheaded.
“Yes, but we’ve been making sure everything’s been going smoothly. Your body needed time to heal after such a serious accident, but we’re going to make sure you’re back to performing on stage in no time.”
Beca glances at Chloe again, this time with worry in her eyes. Chloe feels the worst kind of dread seeping into her body. “We didn’t make it to finals,” she says, finally confirming Chloe’s worst fear.
She can’t even dwell or demand reprieve from the sudden pain that floods through her. She’s not even sure somebody catches her before she hits the ground.
––––––
Beca’s not sure what to make of Chloe when she wakes up to her not once, but twice. Perhaps multiple times in between, but most vividly, she recalls seeing Chloe when she had woken up the first time - the startling jolt back to reality.
Beca thinks that Chloe has always been exceptionally pretty. Beautiful, even. But she let her crush mellow out over the course of her freshman year, thinking it probably was inappropriate to crush on your senior teammate, especially since said teammate would be leaving at the end of the year.
Though, perhaps getting hit by a truck makes Beca reconsider that a little bit. She finds herself struck by the most peculiar sense of comfort with Chloe by her side. Like her body responds instinctively and accordingly to Chloe’s presence.
When she fully wakes up a second time, Chloe is still there. Beca blinks awake slowly and finds herself watching Chloe for a few moments as her body wakes up slowly following her mind. She realizes she’s sore all over, her throat is aching, and Chloe is holding her hand while intently reading from a nondescript folder.
Chloe, she wants to call out on instinct. Her throat denies her mind’s request (though she’s still unsure why she’s so drawn to her). So she flexes her fingers instead while she works the muscles in her throat, trying to get some saliva down.
The series of events that follow are exceptionally confusing. The way Chloe pushes her fingers through Beca’s hair in an admittedly comforting gesture.
The way Beca wants to sink into it, but at the same time, she barely knows Chloe.
They’re teammates.
This seems to be startling information to Chloe - though Beca does notice that Chloe does look tired. Exhausted, even.
It’s still a shock to everybody in the room when Chloe faints on the spot.
––––––
There are more questions than answers and that’s incredibly frustrating to Beca.
She learns that her father had visited earlier during her hospital stay, but he had to return to work.
“Am I not in Atlanta?” she asks, already fearing the answer.
“No, you’re at UCLA Medical Center. I promise we have the strictest patient confidentiality here and that–”
Beca thinks she must be dreaming. “I’m in California?” Chloe’s reaction makes a bit more sense and yet nothing is completely making sense in her head. “What – what’s the date?”
The nurse looks incredibly concerned. “I’ll be right back, Ms. Mitchell.”
“No, wait–”
Beca slumps, more confused than ever. The door clicks shut and she’s met with silence again. In her hand, a phantom twitch, like she’s expecting somebody there to hold her hand.
––––––
“–dramatic,” Aubrey is muttering. She tilts her head once she sees Chloe blinking up at her tiredly. “Oh, you’re awake. You and Beca are going to be the death of me.”
Chloe barely registers her surroundings before she’s recalling exactly what had happened in Beca’s hospital room.
“How long was I out?” Chloe asks, surprised at Aubrey’s presence. “When did you get here?”
Aubrey sighs. “I got here about an hour ago because they called me, but I haven’t been filled in yet. What happened to you?”
“She doesn’t remember,” Chloe says immediately, ignoring how raspy her voice is. “She doesn’t remember me, Bree. I have – I have to–” she cuts herself off, unable to fully comprehend the seriousness of her own words.
Aubrey pauses from where she’s wiping down the edges of Chloe’s bed. “Who? Beca?”
“Yeah,” Chloe says. She notes that she doesn’t have any IVs in her and moves to push herself out of bed. “I have to see her.”
“Wait, we should probably–”
“Oh good,” Doctor Gibson says, walking into the room. “You’re awake. I thankfully caught you before you fell. You’re overworked, Ms. Beale. You probably fainted due to exhaustion. Might I sug–”
Chloe shakes her head. “I need to talk to her.”
He looks bemused if anything, as if he’s not surprised Chloe doesn’t care about her own well-being. “She’s asking for you, actually.” He glances at Aubrey. “Both of you, if Ms. Posen is willing. Though I recommend changing as not to startle her again.” He points at the fact that Chloe is wearing an oversized hospital gown.
Chloe gets changed in record time. She practically pushes Aubrey out of the room so they can follow Beca’s doctor down the hall.
“I’m sure it’s all going to be fine, Chloe,” Aubrey murmurs to her.
Chloe can barely answer because her heart feels like it’s about to jump out of her throat.
And if it isn’t?
On cue, Beca’s doctor turns to face them, just outside Beca’s room. “As I’m sure you’ve figured out, Ms. Mitchell’s memory has been affected by the accident. Over the past couple of hours, we’ve updated her a little bit as to what the situation is exactly. She’s…” he trails off, contemplating his word choice. “She’s taken it fairly well and we’ve actually noted that she remembers odd spots of time, but it seems…” Here, he trails off looking at Chloe directly and apologetically. An expression that Chloe hates immediately. “It does seem that she does not recall anything in recent memory.”
She’s not sure how she can rearrange her life around this, but she’s going to figure it out as long as Beca will have her.
Beca is sitting up in bed when they enter. Her shoulders are hunched slightly while she pores over pamphlets. “Hi,” she greets in a surprisingly shy manner when they both enter. Or perhaps it’s a distinctly uncomfortable manner. “You’re feeling better?” she asks, concerned. It’s directed at Chloe.
“Yeah. I just...tired.” She itches to stand closer to Beca, but something holds her back. Specifically, the memory of Beca recoiling from her touch.
“Hey...Aubrey,” Beca says, her voice tighter, though barely noticeable if Chloe weren’t so attuned to her voice.
“Between you and Chloe, I feel like I have to take out insurance policies for both of you on my dime,” Aubrey jokes.
Beca looks between them, confused. Like hearing Aubrey joke and laugh is foreign to her.
“Chloe, I wanted to...well, I guess I wanted to just…” Beca glances at her hands. “I think I’m a little confused, but I don’t understand why…” Frustration begins to color her tone. “Are you and I…a thing?”
She says it in a hushed tone of voice, like the idea is close to scandalous. Or out of Beca’s frame of reference.
Chloe’s not sure how she looks at that moment, but it’s probably some form of hysterical. She tries to look at Beca deeply, with as much eye contact as she dares, praying for some kind of miracle. Beca stares back at her with nothing more than curiosity and some concern.
So, Beca recognizes her, but not in the way Chloe wants so badly. Not in the way she had grown used to over the years; not the kind of expression she was so used to seeing on Beca’s face, especially when directed at her.  
“Beca, please try and remember me,” Chloe asks softly, making silence fall in the room again.
“I do remember you, Chloe,” Beca says after a long moment. “I do,” she promises. “I just…this is a lot of information and I…I don’t feel eighteen, but that’s –” she gestures vaguely. “That’s the last thing I remember with startling clarity. Being eighteen. Maybe little bursts of time that follow, but everything is so confusing.”
The sheer pain and anxiety coloring Beca’s tone makes tears spring up in Chloe’s eyes on instinct.
“So you’ve lost six years of your life,” Chloe clarifies weakly. She wills her tears back, not wanting to collapse emotionally when the rest of her life seems like it’s on the verge of doing the same.  
“It’s not that simple,” Gibson says quietly from behind them.
So you’ve lost me, Chloe wants to say; wants to scream.
"Chloe–” Beca coughs, shaking her head for a moment. “Chloe, we’re – I barely know you.” Beca’s brow furrows as guilt seeps across her face like a shadow. “I…I shouldn’t have snapped at you, though.”
Chloe ignores Dr. Gibson’s hand on her shoulder. “Snapped at me?” she asks, losing some of the feeling in her hands. “You didn’t…You didn’t snap at me–” Shakily, Chloe takes in a breath. “Bec, I–”
“Ms. Beale, may I speak with you privately?” Dr. Gibson finally says, interrupting. Beca looks increasingly worried, probably due to the flush rising up Chloe’s neck and cheeks at an alarming rate. Or maybe due to the way Chloe’s hands are beginning to tremble.
Chloe stares at Beca for a moment longer, tears springing to her eyes. Beca opens her mouth to say something, but Chloe turns on her heel before Beca can do so. “Okay,” she agrees quietly, too shaky to say or do much else.
“Ms. Mitchell is going to be okay,” Dr. Gibson says once the door clicks shut. He leads Chloe down a few paces to a short row of pale blue plastic chairs.
Chloe wants to protest because obviously Beca is not okay. She’s the opposite of okay. “How is she okay?” Chloe finally manages to say once her tongue unsticks from the roof of her mouth. The air feels oppressive and dry. She licks her lips to moisten them. “She’s – she doesn’t remember me–”
“She does remember you,” Gibson corrects softly. “Ms. Beale–”
“–Chloe,” she interrupts softly. “Please don’t call me…yeah. Please don’t call me that.”  
Not when all I’ve been thinking about is becoming Beca’s wife .  
“Okay Chloe,” he says, smiling at her in a calming manner. “Beca does remember you. She said as much.”
“But it’s…the timing. She doesn’t remember…” Chloe trails off, the thought too painful to completely.  
She doesn’t remember being in love with me.
She doesn’t remember falling in love with me.  
If there’s something that scares Chloe a lot, it’s losing people she cares about. In any form – and especially Beca.
“Amnesia is a tricky thing. Even characterizing this as ‘amnesia’ is tricky,” Doctor Gibson says quietly. “No patient’s case is the same as another.”
“What’s...okay, so what’s going to happen?”
“It’s still so early. Like I said, she remembers odd pockets of time, but just…” He refrains from saying exactly what Beca lost.
What they both lost.
“We just need to give her time. Make sure everything’s okay physically. And if her memories come back, they come back.”
“And if they don’t?”
“Then they don’t.”
“Isn’t there – isn’t there a form of therapy to help her with that? Medication? Is - is there a possibility that there’s an injury you overlooked?” Chloe feels desperation rush through her like ice with each option she tosses out. “I can–” she racks her head for whether herself or her coworkers have taken on clients with memory loss. “There’s something,” she says softly. “There has to be.”
“There’s always a possibility to all the above,” Beca’s doctor says kindly. “Though, in terms of injury, I can say that her brain is pretty intact. No intense internal bleeding or extremely concerning areas. This kind of memory loss isn’t necessarily always triggered by physical injury, though it does exacerbate the situation. She went through a pretty traumatic event, so it’s going to take some time to heal mentally and emotionally beyond the physical.”
Chloe remains silent at that. She grapples with her own perceived selfishness - of desperately wanting to take Beca away somewhere quiet so they can live out the rest of their days - and the desire to make Beca whole again.
The two feel oddly distinct and separate, especially now knowing that their story has come to an abrupt pause. Like somebody cutting off a song in the middle of the bridge. Chloe thinks she should know what happens next, but she doesn’t know and can’t say for certain because Beca has her finger on the pulse of their lives together and Chloe’s not sure what’s coming next.
(When Chloe was growing up, her older brother shuttled her around. He never let her control the radio, even when she was finally old enough to sit in the front next to him. He always changed the song, making anxiety build up in her because he would cut her off in the middle of a song.
It’s the same anxiety, but different.)
Gibson’s voice floats in and out of her mind. “I’ll give you a bit of time alone, but I think she’d still really like to talk to you.”
––––––
When Chloe finds a way to calm down and gather her thoughts, she takes a steadying breath and stands. Doctor Gibson is long gone. He mentioned that Beca would probably still want to talk to her.
So she walks back into the room where her life ended as she knew it.
Beca is awake and talking quietly with Aubrey. Aubrey who looks as uncomfortable as Chloe feels, but still has a steadying hand on Beca’s shoulder like the true friend she had become to Beca.
“I’ll give you guys a moment,” Aubrey murmurs when Chloe shuffles in slowly. She squeezes Chloe’s arm on the way out.
“Can we start over?” Beca asks softly. “That’s why I wanted to see you. I could really use a…” her voice catches as a peculiar flush rises up her cheeks. “A friend.”
She says it with difficulty, like she’s warring with the need to ask for help in any form. Chloe can see how hard this is for Beca, so intimately familiar with all her tells and quirks. But this in particular is a flashback if anything. As much as Beca had said she didn’t feel eighteen – and further, as much as she doesn’t look eighteen – at that moment, all Chloe sees is a memory: a memory of Beca, small and hurt; Beca at her most vulnerable. Beca at her most insecure.
She was never able to deny Beca Mitchell anything, no matter the time or day.
“Of course,” Chloe says softly. “Anything you need.”
She sees only gratefulness in Beca’s eyes and tries not to let that destroy her completely.
xx
tbc // ch. 1 | ch. 2 | ch. 3 | ch. 4 | ch. 5 | ch. 6 | ch. 7 | ch. 8 | ch. 9 | ch. 10
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katelides · 5 years ago
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Good Or Bad Luck: Chapter 43
The group meets Stacie in the waiting room. The tall brunette lets out a relieved breath when she sees her best friend walking up to her. “Thank god you’re here.” She rushes out while wrapping the other brunette in a tight hug. “I don’t know what to do, or think…” Stacie whispers.
“Whoa, Stace, take a deep breath and let’s sit down, ok?” Beca leads her best friend towards some chairs in the room and makes her sit down. “When you feel up to it, start from the beginning, and tell me what’s going on.” Stacie takes a deep breath and tries to listen to her best friend but her fears keep taking over. What if the surgery went really bad and Aubrey is dead?
Beca notices the expressions on her best friend’s face change from bad to worse so she steps in. “Ok, Stace, Aubrey will be fine. I just need to know what has been said before, I know that you love her and that right now you’re scared, but she’s strong, and May would never let anything happen to her.”
Stacie manages to take a deep breath and looks up into her best friends eyes. “May came out after the surgery and it looked like something was wrong. She walked straight past me and when I tried to talk to her she just blew me off… I don’t know what to think… I’m scared Beca, I’m really scared.”
Beca tries to think of the right words to say but nothing seems to be right enough. She doesn’t really get much time because Chloe is rapidly tapping her on her shoulder, so she turns around and sees her girlfriend staring off in the distance, not stopping her tapping. This, of course, catches Stacie’s attention, so she looks back towards the place the redhead is looking and sees May standing at the desk, signing some papers.
Beca doesn’t get a chance to fully apprehend what's happening but before she knows it, she’s left sitting on the floor while her friends run off, and bombard their friend and doctor with millions of questions. The brunette gets up from the floor with help from Benji and Emily, and they make their way up to the three.
She can hear bits and pieces from the questions but doesn’t really catch a whole sentence.
“Stacie, Chloe…” Hearing Beca’s authoritative voice, the two stop talking instantly and awkwardly take a step back, quietly apologizing to May. “It’s alright girls. I understand. I shouldn’t have blown you off before either, I’m sorry.” May sighs slightly before taking a deep breath. “Anyway, I have news about Aubrey. She did great during the surgery, she’s back in her room and should be waking up soon.”
The news instantly puts a smile on Stacie’s face. “When can we see her?” Chloe asks, just as impatient as her best friend’s girlfriend. “You can go up to her room now, she’ll be glad to see you when you wake up,” May says when she steps aside to give her friends a free passage to the hospital rooms.
Beca hesitates slightly and lets her friends go first before turning back to May. “Don’t get me wrong, I don’t really know you that well. But I do know Stacie, and if something is wrong and you’re not telling us, she’ll be devastated.” The brunette says calmly.
“I understand, but there is no need to worry. I blew Stacie off by accident before. There was something that had to be checked with our department in New York, and I was in a hurry. I promise you that the surgery went fine, now we just need to pray that the implant worked.” May explains.
Beca nods her head with a not so convincing smile but lets it go for now. “Why don’t you go see Aubrey as well? I’ll join you girls in a bit, I want to freshen up a bit first.” Beca agrees with the doctor and leaves in the same direction as her best friend and girlfriend went not too long ago.
-,-,-,-,-
It has been three hours since Aubrey was brought into her room. Beca had sent the ‘kids’ to the cafeteria and told them to hang out there for a while, and that she would come and get them when Aubrey would wake up.
Stacie has been alternating between pacing and sitting by the blonde’s side, gently squeezing her hand. Beca, on the other hand, was sitting in a corner, watching her best friend worry and her girlfriend trying to figure out what to say.
It’s almost four hours later when the first signs of Aubrey waking up are happening. Chloe and Stacie are instantly standing by her side, encouraging the blonde to wake up. Beca watches the two women for a moment and then decides to go get May.
It doesn’t take her long as she finds the doctor already walking up towards the room. “Hey Beca, how’s everyone doing?” She asks with a smile. “Everyone is fine, Aubrey is waking up as we speak, I think Stacie is helping her through it.”
May smiles warmly and looks over Beca’s shoulder at the door. “You should go in there, I’m going to warn the kids that she’s waking up,” Beca says with a smile of her own, before walking away towards the stairs that would lead her to Emily and Benji.
Beca finds the two love birds almost instantly somewhere in the back of the cafeteria, holding hands and quietly talking to each other. She makes her way towards them and clears her throat when she reaches the table. “Aubrey is waking up.” She says slightly louder than a whisper. “How is she?” Benji asks. “Not sure yet, we’ll find out once she’s fully awake.”
“Can we go see her?” Emily asks carefully. “Sure, but we need to make sure we don’t overwhelm her while we are in there.” The teenagers quickly agree and then get up to follow Beca up to Aubrey’s room.
When the three are about to reach the room, Stacie almost storms out with a huff, Chloe following her soon after with a worried expression. Beca doesn’t hesitate and straight out walks up to them. “What happened?” She asks Chloe. “Aubrey kicked us out of the room. That’s what happened.” Stacie answers instead, with a sour look on her face.
Looking at Chloe for something more of an explanation, but no luck. “Alright, Stace, maybe she just needed to talk to May for a moment.” Beca tries to calm down her best friend but to no avail. “What can be so difficult that I would not be able to understand it, huh? I bet something happened during the surgery and they’re just not telling us.” Stacie spits back angrily.
Beca wants to jump in and try to convince her best friend that it isn’t true but gets beaten to it by May. “The surgery went just fine, Stacie. It’s the implant that worries her, she’s worried about what would happen if it doesn’t work.” The raven-haired woman quickly explains. “I told her that with or without the implant she would most likely walk again. The implant should, in the best case scenario, stimulate her muscles to help her regain her mobility faster. This implant is still in its beginning stages so we’re not even sure if it will actually work.”
Stacie takes in a deep breath, trying to figure out what she could say to Aubrey when she goes back inside. Yet nothing seems to sound right in her head. “I uh I need to talk to her. To tell her everything will be alright.” The tallest brunette doesn’t even seem to acknowledge her friends around her. She walks around them, straight into the room.
Aubrey looks up from her phone when Stacie enters. The blonde slouches back into her pillow, not really feeling up to having a confrontation about her feelings. Stacie instantly notices the movement and the facial expression on her girlfriend’s face and lets out a heavy sigh. “Bree, can we please talk?”
Stacie takes a hesitant step closer to the bed but stops when she doesn’t get an answer. “Please, we need to be able to talk about this.” The brunette's voice is on the brink of being desperate. “There is nothing to say. I might walk again. I might never walk again. We knew that before the surgery, so nothing has changed.” Aubrey says, in a voice barely louder than a whisper.
“Give it some time Bree. You will start physiotherapy again and maybe the implant will start wo-“ Stacie gets cut off by a heavy sigh. “I’m not sure if…” Stacie notices a tear rolling down her girlfriend’s cheek. She instantly rushes to the blonde’s side and grabs her hand. “Babe, I promise that no matter, whatever happens, I’ll always be by your side. We will make it through.”
“N-no, y-you can’t promise that,” Aubrey says, trying to hold in her tears. “What? Of course, I can. I love you Aubrey, and I will never leave you.” Aubrey can hear the sincerity in Stacie's voice, but something still doesn’t let her believe it. “I appreciate it Stacie but…” After taking a deep breath she continues. “ I think that maybe it’s best for us to take some time apart, and figure out what we need… Whom we need.”
Stacie lets go of Aubrey’s hand in shock. “Wait, a-are yo-, are you breaking up with me?” She asks, her knees trembling as she takes a step backward. “I don’t know what we’re doing Stacie, I can’t give you the life you deserve and I’d rather figure things out on my own, instead of stringing you along in false hope.”
The last words broke something in Stacie, nothing in the world could have ever hurt her more than this moment. She just stares at the blonde, not knowing what to say. It takes her a few minutes to figure out what she could say but it feels like hours. “If that’s what you want then fine, but I am not giving up on us. I’ll give you your space but I will never give up on our love.”
Not really giving Aubrey another chance to say something about it, Stacie leaves the room where she’s met with five worried faces. “I uh, I need to go.” She quickly mutters before rushing off and disappearing down the stairs. Beca and Chloe share a look and know what they have to do.
Chloe rushes into her best friend’s hospital room, while Beca runs towards the direction her best friend went to. The brunette comes back a few minutes later when she realizes she left Benji and Emily by the door. “Sorry, I got worried and forgot that-“ Benji cuts her off with a laugh. “Don’t worry, we’ll wait here for Chloe, now go after Stacie, she needs you.” Beca doesn’t need to be told twice and rushes down the stairs.
-,-,-,-,-,-
Chloe stares at her best friend, not sure whether she should be angry with her, or try and comfort hurt. The redhead is extremely confused about everything as she watches her friend cry her eyes out. “Can you tell me what happened?” She asks gently. Aubrey nods her head as she tries to wipe away her tears.
The redhead slowly makes way towards the bed and sits down next to her. “Bree, I know you love her and that’s why I need to know what just happened in here.” The slight pressure Chloe puts on her friend, helps her open up.
“I uh, I think I just broke up with her.” Aubrey manages to choke out with great difficulty. “What?!” Chloe all but shouts. “What do you mean? You mean the world to her. Why would you do that? Did she say something? Or-“
“Chloe!”
The redhead instantly stops talking and looks down at her feet in embarrassment. “Sorry, I got carried away.” She meekly apologizes. “Don’t worry about it Chlo. I get it. But there is no way I’m changing my mind.”
Letting out a heavy sigh, Chloe takes her best friend’s hand and gives it a squeeze. “I get that you’re scared about what will happen but you also need to understand that Stacie worries about you too. She loves you so very much, and I haven’t seen anyone make you this happy, ever.”
Aubrey knows her best friend is right, but yet she still has a very bad feeling about this surgery. “I do understand Chlo. That’s why I need to take a step back and figure things out on my own. I don’t want to put this pressure on her. I need her to find happiness with someone who can take her on those long walks she loves. The adventures she has been dreaming about. And she can’ t do that with a significant other in a wheelchair. We haven’t had sex since the accident, and we both know how she is, I can’t keep denying this for her.”
Chloe listens intently to her best friends words and gently shakes her head. “She would give up sex if it meant being with you, I just hope that you’ll be able to see it eventually,” Chloe says after a few minutes.
The girls stay quiet. Each thinking of different things. Aubrey about how she would get her stuff out of Stacie’s apartment. While Chloe is hoping that Beca’s conversation with Stacie has a better outcome than this one.
I DO NOT OWN PITCH PERFECT!
REVIEWS = HAPPY ME
HAPPY ME = QUICKER UPDATES
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lets-talk-appella · 6 years ago
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Come Home to Me (part 2)
Summary: “Beca would never drive like this with Chloe; the thought of getting into a car accident with Chloe next to her is too alarming for her to risk it. But when it’s just her in the car… well. Obeying speed limits seems less important. She gains another three miles per hour. At this speed, the cross breeze over the road catches at her car a little, making it wobble around in the lane until she adjusts. It’s not a big deal, though. She needs to drive this fast. She really doesn’t want Chloe to worry.” 
Or, Beca’s POV of the accident and the moments surrounding it. Describes the accident, though not in graphic detail. I highly recommend reading the first part HERE.
Word Count: 4.3k
AO3 and FFN
Beca knows she’s running late. She and Chloe always eat dinner just after 6:00, so she usually gets home a little before then to help set the table. But at this rate, she won’t be home until at least 6:10, if not later. She pushes against the gas pedal more firmly and smiles when she passes another car.
She’d had such a bad day at BFD Records. Her computer had been slow, so she’d had to call IT to spend nearly three hours updating it. Consequently, she hadn’t been able to finish a big project she’d been hoping to complete. She’d also had a disagreement with her boss, who seems to be under the impression that rap should be overlaid on every pop track. Then, she’d somehow manage to spill her coffee into her purse and had to take everything out of it to dry on her desk.
Then at the end of the day, yet another one of her clients flew off the diva handle and decided to hold a conference call less than fifteen minutes before she’d been planning on leaving. What should have been a small issue turned into nearly a half-hour debate over a chord progression that ended with Beca gritting her teeth and following the artist’s wishes. Even if it did make the song sound like shit.
Now, thanks to the delay, she’s running late. And the worst part, the absolute cherry on top of this whole day, is that her phone is dead. Which wouldn’t be a big deal, but it means that she can’t let Chloe know she’s late. For the first time in their relationship, she can’t warn her wife not to expect her at the usual time. Which, again, wouldn’t be a big deal, but Beca fully understands why Chloe likes to know when she’s running late. Chloe’s life had been torn apart when her dad had died in a car accident, so it’s completely reasonable for her to want to know when Beca’s going to be home.
Beca would be lying if she said their whole “I’m going to be late” system didn’t give her some peace of mind, too. She likes to know where Chloe is and when to expect to see her again. Because of that, from the moment they’d made their agreement, Beca has kept a spare phone charger in her purse. And a car charger in her console, just in case.
But because she had been in a hurry leaving work, she’d forgotten to finish replacing the items in her purse following the coffee fiasco. She’d left her charger on her desk, along with the little notebook she keeps with her, her checkbook, and her miniature flashlight. She hadn’t even realized she’d left the charger until she’d already gotten onto I-495, and by then it seemed pointless to go back. She has another at home. And it wouldn’t even be a problem, but the charger she usually keeps in her car is currently in Chloe’s because she’d forgotten to put it back following their recent visit to Aubrey.
In conclusion, she is a complete idiot and Chloe is going to worry.
That is, unless she can get home before Chloe notices she’s late. She only has to drive a little faster. She presses again on the gas pedal and watches the needle on the speedometer creep up another five miles per hour.
She knows she’s going well over the speed limit as it is for this heavy of traffic (leaving Brooklyn at rush hour is a bitch), but she’s managed to avoid the serious traffic jams (largely by speeding past them). She would never drive like this with Chloe; the thought of getting into a car accident with Chloe next to her is too alarming for her to risk it. But when it’s just her in the car… well. Obeying speed limits seems less important.
She gains another three miles per hour.
At this speed, the cross breeze over the road catches at her car a little, making it wobble around in the lane until she adjusts. It’s not a big deal, though. She needs to drive this fast. She really doesn’t want Chloe to worry.
With a glance at the radio clock, she sees that she’s made up for lost time reasonably well. If she continues to avoid any major traffic jams, she might actually make it home on time. Beca smiles and relaxes her grip on the wheel; Chloe won’t even know she’d been running late. No harm done.
Up ahead, she spots several cars changing lanes to pass what appears to be a large gas hauler. She grimaces. She really doesn’t like driving around trucks because their size makes her nervous. She knows she’s a small person in a small car, so big rigs like that are intimidating. She’ll just have to pass it quickly instead of hovering beside it.
She follows the lead of the cars already passing the truck and waits until she’s next in line, driving rather closer to the back of the hauler than she normally might. But she’s in a hurry, so it’s fine. Absentmindedly, she notes that the hauler is swaying a little in the wind, its bulk a detriment. It only makes her more determined to pass it quickly before, God forbid, it sways over into the next lane or something.
She flicks on her blinker and checks her blind spot before changing to the passing lane. She fully intends to fly by the thing at top speed, but the car ahead of her is moving agonizingly slowly. It’s annoying. She gets closer to the car, hoping the driver will take the hint, until finds herself stuck right beside the gas hauler.
Her eyes jump between the car blocking her path and the swaying truck next to her, her grip tightening on the wheel. She doesn’t like this much. It makes her uneasy. In fact, she feels weird in general, as if she’d swallowed something wiggly in the last minute. It’s not particularly pleasant. A bead of sweat forms on her forehead and wonders if she’s maybe going to be sick.
Beca blinks, uncertain as to why she’s suddenly not feeling well. Inexplicably, she thinks of Chloe.
The car ahead of her is so slow. Haven’t they ever passed anyone before?
The hauler lurches over the line and into her lane by a foot, thrown by the wind. She gasps sharply and fights the urge to jerk the wheel; the truck corrects the swerve and moves back into the slow lane. Her anxious, sick feeling intensifies.
She’s had enough. She checks her rearview and, seeing no one in the fast lane behind her, backs off on the speed. Her car slows until she’s no longer beside the hauler and she switches back into the slow lane behind it and ahead of another car. That car honks at her, but she can’t bring herself to care. No way is she getting plowed into by a gas hauler, thank you very much.
Her car slows even further, her strange illness receding with every foot she gains between herself and the hauler. The car that had prevented her from passing finally moves ahead to make way for a line of cars behind Beca waiting to pass the truck as well.
She briefly thinks of changing back to the fast lane and passing now that the way is unobstructed, but for some reason Chloe’s face again flashes into her mind. She really doesn’t want to be anywhere near the hauler.
Beca grumbles a little, but slows until she’s driving at the speed limit. Chloe would never forgive her if she got into an accident driving home.
Now, because she’s slowed so much, cars are passing her and moving between her and the truck. She lets them, putting as much distance between herself and the hauler as she can. She doesn’t know why, but being near the truck had terrified her.
She sends her wife a silent apology and hopes Chloe won’t worry too much about her for being ten minutes late.
It happens in an instant.
A particularly strong gust of wind slams into her and everyone else on the interstate. She adjusts, but watches as the hauler teeters dangerously into the next lane, sideswiping the car attempting to pass it. The driver of the hauler overcorrects; the whole thing lurches first one way, then the other. It’s too much, and the momentum of the rig has it tumbling out of control, the cab of the truck suddenly in the fast lane and the trailer turning sideways and skidding along and tipping until it finally falls to scrape on the road, landing on the car that had been next to it.
The air rushes from Beca’s lungs as if she’d been punched in the gut.
A hideous screech of metal fills the air, a cacophony of noise that Beca is sure is the soundtrack to Hell. The cars ahead of her, unable to stop, plow directly into the crash. Beca slams on the brake, not caring that there is someone driving close behind her, focused only on not smashing into the growing pile of cars and twisted metal in front of her. She’s flung forward into her seatbelt as her car slows rapidly, but she’s not sure it’s enough. Sparks fly as the side of the hauler scrapes along the road and tears open as if made from plastic wrap.
She’s blinded by an impossibly bright light and slams her eyes shut, jerking the wheel instinctively at the tremendous blast of sound and invisible force that assaults her. She knows the instant she’s driven off the road and onto the shoulder, the rumble strips bouncing under her tires even has the ground shakes.
Beca braces herself, waiting for an impact from ahead or from behind, some huge collision that will almost certainly end her life and all she can think is Chloe, Chloe, Chloe –
But it never comes. She’s rigid in her seat, only registering that her car has come to a complete stop after several moments. A high-pitched ringing fills her ears and at first she can’t hear anything else, her eyes still shut tightly. Gradually, the ringing fades and sound returns – she hears her own rapid breaths and a strange, whimpering, gasping noise that stops as soon as she thinks about it. Oh. It was her. The next sounds to reach her ears are a loud whooshing, crackling noise and a lot of honking.
Beca opens her eyes. Her car has come to rest on the shoulder, somehow spun sideways, her windshield facing the road. She has the perfect view of a mountain of burning, twisted metal about 300 feet ahead of her and it takes her a moment to realize what it is.
When she does, she almost screams. Even when she recognizes the remains of the gas hauler and the cars that had been close around it, she doesn’t quite believe what she’s seeing. Surely, there should be police and ambulances by now, if people were trapped in there? Where were the flashing lights?
Then she realizes; it’s only been seconds since the hauler tipped. She feels sick again and wonders if she should exit her car to either throw up or drag people away from the accident. But at the same time, her legs are trembling so badly that she’s not sure they can support her. And she has no medical training; attempting to help might do more harm than good. Beca exhales through her nose shakily and leans her head onto the steering wheel, feeling helpless. Oh, God. She’d almost passed the hauler. She’d almost been next to it when –
Chloe. Beca’s eyes fly open and she bolts upright in her seat. She reaches for her phone automatically to call her wife, only to be greeted by a black screen. That’s right. Dead battery.
Chloe will see the news, surely. She and Beca both have emergency notifications turned on in their phones. Chloe will know what happened.
Except, no, she won’t know anything because all she’ll see in the news is a tipped truck and an explosion and she won’t hear anything from Beca because her phone is dead.
Oh God.
She has to get home. She has to move. Where are the damn ambulances? She needs to tell Chloe she’s okay because Chloe is going to see the news and call Beca and Beca won’t answer because her phone is dead and Chloe will panic and freak out and she’ll think Beca’s as dead as her phone and she’s got to get home before it happens and tell Chloe she’s okay and –
Beca’s breath comes in short, rapid bursts and her entire body quivers. Is this a panic attack? she thinks frantically. She’s not sure. She’s never had one before. But it feels like she imagines one would.
Ironically, the sound of sirens soothes her. She raises her head to see beautiful, glorious police cars, firetrucks, and ambulances rushing toward the burning mayhem ahead of her. For the first time since the crash, she looks around at the other cars trapped along with her. Because there are other cars; she’d been ahead of them.
A huge traffic jam lies behind her, with the car she’d been sure was going to rear end her resting half on the shoulder and half on the road facing her. She makes eye contact with the man at the wheel. He stares back, some of the horror she feels reflected in his eyes. Beside him, another car is at a complete stop in the fast lane, its front bumper caved in where it had hit the car lying in the opposite ditch from behind. Everyone she can see is moving and looking around, terrified.
Beyond all of them, back toward Brooklyn, hundreds of cars line up in wait to get around the accident. Beca glances back toward the carnage; rescue personnel are sprinting to it now, most moving toward the blast and attempting to control the flames, some rushing to the few cars strewn between Beca and the wreckage.
She drops her head back in the seat, her car still running idle until she figures it’s safer to turn it off. She can’t believe how lucky she is. If she’d been closer, or if she hadn’t backed off from passing the hauler… Her stomach lurches again.
She looks back out her windshield to see an emergency responder restrain someone attempting to exit their car. Beca takes the hint. Stay in the car. Stay safe from the flames and fumes. Easy enough. She knows it’ll be a long time before she can continue on her way home.
Oh God. Her hands clench into fists in her lap. Chloe.
Beca squeezes her eyes shut against the heat prickling in them. She’s breathing hard again, struggling to remain calm. She can picture it clearly; Chloe sitting at the table with dinner all prepared, anxiously tapping her knee and staring out the window. Chloe’s phone alerting her to the news, making her jump up and pace (Chloe always paces when she’s nervous). Beca imagines she’ll try calling her, but won’t it just go to voicemail? Isn’t that what happens when your phone dies? And Chloe won’t understand, won’t know why she’s not answering. She’s sure some of the Bellas (oh, the Bellas are going to be terrified, too, God, why did she leave her charger in Chloe’s car) will text both her and Chloe. Beca’s stomach twists. What will Chloe say to them? In her mind’s eye, Beca sees Chloe becoming more and more concerned, her eyebrows drawing together and tears forming. She knows Chloe is going to assume the worst – how could she not, considering how her father died?
Beca forces herself from her daydream, her breathing becoming erratic again. She feels dampness in her underarms as well as on her forehead from stress. She debates exiting her car to ask someone to borrow their phone to call Chloe, but then remembers that she’s supposed to stay where she is. She knows it’s for the best; she’s going to fare better protected in her car than out on the street should there be a second explosion.
It’s just. Chloe is going to be so scared. Beca knows if their situations were reversed, she’d be going ballistic.
Chloe, I’m so sorry, Chlo, I left my charger, I’m so stupid, I’m so sorry, Chlo, I’m sorry. Beca finds herself thinking in loops, desperately wishing she were telekinetic or telepathic or whichever dumb superpower it is that would let her transmit her thoughts to others. Is that even a power? she wonders, slightly hysterical. Why isn’t that some kind of spousal power you get when you get married?
Guilt claws its way from her chest to her throat, making her swallow hard. Her mouth is so dry, though, that the action causes her to gag. Her hands have somehow landed on the wheel, clutching it, her knuckles white. Her chest and collarbone hurt from where she’d been thrown against the seatbelt in the sudden stop. She knows she’s going to have a dark bruise. Her back and shoulders ache, full of tension, and she wonders vaguely if Chloe can give her a massage when she gets home.
Because she will be getting home. Just, late.
Time moves in strange gallops. Ambulances come and go, pulling people from the wreckage where the firetrucks have extinguished the flames, but Beca doesn’t allow herself to look at the people on the stretchers. The police are setting up an alternative route so that the cars backed up behind the accident can eventually move. She wishes they could work faster. She thinks she hears a helicopter overhead but can’t see it when she cranes her neck. She figures it’s the news outlets when it doesn’t land to take anyone to a hospital.
After what feels like an eon, but is actually about forty minutes, the majority of the ambulances are gone and emergency responders finally start to wave cars through. Beca’s heart leaps and she scrabbles at her keys, still in the ignition. For a gut-wrenching moment, she thinks the car isn’t going to start, but then the engine wheezes to life. She hadn’t done her car any favors but stopping so abruptly.
Knee tapping impatiently, she waits for her turn, for the police officer to beckon her forward to inch around the accident and continue on her way. The few cars ahead of her gradually file past, driving awkwardly half on the shoulder and half in the ditch to skirt around the still-smoldering pile of metal. The only problem is, she’s still sideways on the shoulder. When the officer finally beckons to her, Beca grits her teeth and reverses into the ditch, turning the wheel to straighten the car. She pulls ahead, pointing her car in the right direction before inching forward.
She keeps her eyes focused on the road ahead of her as she passes, not wanting to see the people still trapped in the pile. She doesn’t want even more nightmares than she’ll already have.
She doesn’t realize she’d been holding her breath until it whooshes out of her once she’s the other side of the accident. Cautiously, she speeds up until she’s again cruising toward home, the horror behind her growing smaller in her rearview. She’s aching to press the accelerator to the floor, anything to get home to Chloe sooner, but her nerves are completely wrecked, and she doesn’t trust herself to drive beyond the speed limit.
Chloe, I’m coming. I’m okay.
A throbbing pain appears above her right eye, though she knows she didn’t hit her head. Surely, she should be home by now? How is it possible that the miles are passing so slowly?
She laughs shakily when she spies her exit. Only a few more turns.
She takes the exit, ending up close to home. Only a few more blocks.
She flinches when someone going the other way honks at a car sitting at a green light.
When she pulls onto their road, she almost cries in relief. Her head feels cloudy, like she’s not really in her own body.
She pulls into their driveway haphazardly, at a crooked angle, and turns off the ignition with trembling fingers. Her only thought is for the person waiting for her inside.
When Beca throws herself out of car to sprint to front door, her legs almost give out, but she forces herself to move forward. She knows how scared Chloe must be, and that’s unacceptable.
She fiddles with her keys, finally finding the one for the front door. She struggles with the lock for a moment in her haste until she manages to twist the key and open the door.
The second she’s inside, Chloe is upon her. Beca barely has time to take in Chloe’s damp eyes and strained expression before she shouts, “Bec!” and is practically tackling her in a hug.
Beca winds her arms around Chloe, feeling her face pressing into her neck. She stumbles slightly at the force of Chloe’s shaking and her heart drops. Chloe had obviously seen the news and had been utterly terrified. Beca’s never felt so guilty in her life. All she can think to do is press her lips to Chloe’s shoulder and neck as she repeats, “I’m okay, I’m okay, everything is okay.”
Despite her guilt and anxiety, a sense of calm washes over Beca now that she’s back in Chloe’s arms. She’d made it home. She and Chloe were together. That’s all that matters.
She almost protests when Chloe pulls away from the hug – Chloe never pulls away first – but it’s only for a moment while Chloe scrubs a hand over her face. She reaches back for Beca and captures her lips in a firm kiss. Again, Beca stumbles back a step at the emotion and pressure of the kiss, but she manages to hold them both up and kiss Chloe back equally as soundly. Her blood runs cold at the realization of how close she’d come to never kissing her wife again.
As soon as the kiss ends, Beca says, needing Chloe to understand, “I’m so sorry, Chlo, my phone died, and I didn’t have my charger. I’m so, so sorry.” She feels horrible, sick at how much Chloe had worried about her.
Chloe’s fingers land on her face, tracing it delicately, and Beca relaxes into the touch. She’s about to reach up to Chloe’s face, when Chloe winds back to deliver a solid thump on Beca’s arm. Like, really solid.
“Ouch! What the hell –” Beca begins, indignant, before Chloe interrupts, her voice quivering.
“Beca, how dare you not have your charger? I was so scared! I thought you were blown up, or in a ditch, or –”
Beca winces at the very real possibility but decides not to share how close it had been. Chloe would just worry more. Instead, she says, “I know, I’m so sorry,” as she reaches to rest a hand on Chloe’s cheek, calmed by the soft skin she finds there. “I was behind it, leaving Brooklyn when I saw it tip up ahead.” Again, she chooses to omit certain details for Chloe’s sake. “I had to wait in traffic but couldn’t text you and –”
She’s cut off abruptly when Chloe envelops her in another hug, strong and secure. Beca squeezes her eyes shut, focusing on the body in her arms.
Then Chloe whispers, “God. I don’t know what I’d do without you,” and Beca feels it like a kick to the stomach. That sentence tells her all she needs to know about the state Chloe had been in.
She draws Chloe into her even more tightly, and replies, “You’ll never have to find out. I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”
Beca knows it’s not really fair of her to promise something like that. No one can guarantee anything in life, but in that moment, she means it. She will fight to stay with Chloe with everything she has.
She feels Chloe exhale against her, hopefully reassured, before pulling away. She again wipes at her eyes before Beca gets the chance to kiss the tears away.
“Um, I made dinner, but it’s probably not any good anymore,” Chloe says in a fragile voice, changing the subject.
Beca looks over to the table, her chest warming at the sight of ravioli. It’s her absolute favorite. “Oh, ravioli, too,” she says, trying to rally them both. “I’ll microwave it? It’ll still be good.”
Chloe nods, so Beca moves to the table to scoop up the pasta. It looks a little overdone, but she doesn’t mind. She’s starving after all she’s been through, the last of the adrenaline finally leaving her body. Behind her, she hears Chloe’s nails tapping on her phone screen and she can only assume that she’s telling the Bellas she’s okay. Beca glances around and sees her spare charger lying on the counter and kicks herself yet again for being so forgetful. She’ll plug in her phone soon, but after she eats.
Beca pops her plate in the microwave to reheat and senses Chloe’s eyes on her. She turns to her wife and sends her a small smile, hoping to convey all she feels at being home. The tension leaves her body when Chloe returns the smile, relief still shining in her eyes.
Chloe’s expression gives Beca an idea, and she suggests, “I think I’ll stay home from work tomorrow,” as she pulls her now-hot food from the microwave. She knows Chloe has the next day off from work as well, and she thinks the time will be good for them to recuperate after the terror of the evening.
Chloe nods in response, looking suddenly thoughtful. Beca hopes she’s not already planning something too strenuous for them to do. She has something she kind of wants to talk to Chloe about.
As Beca lifts the fork full of ravioli to her mouth, she thinks how much sweeter their home would be with the sound of little feet pattering through it.
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undersummerskyy · 7 years ago
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Bechloe one-shot
I was going to write a really short Bechloe one-shot but it turned into this whole 3000 words of fluff thing and I don’t even know. Enjoy! 
Chloe loves to cuddle. Because, of course, she does. It isn’t really surprising; the redhead was known for startling her friends – mostly Beca – by wrapping her arms around them at the most unexpected times. It wasn’t quick either, Chloe would hug you and pull you as close as possible until it was almost hard to breathe. It scared Beca in the beginning. She’d had friends before, although not many, and knew that girls could sometimes get a little touchy-feely. So yes, she had had friends who would hug her, and she got used to the occasional ‘haven’t-seen-each-other-in-a-while’ hug, which was mostly just one arm wrapped around her waist and sometimes a quick press of lips against her cheek.
This was different though, Chloe was different. The first time it happened was the day Beca got bailed out of jail and she’d just had a rough fight with her father in the car. She was ready to go to bed and just forget everything. Forget the Bellas, forget about her dad, forget stupid fucking Jesse, just... forget it all. She should never have tried caring in the first place. But then, she’d walked through her door and there they were, waiting for her. It had surprised her. 
“You guys waited up for me?” She had asked, not being able to stop the smile from forming on her face. It’s hard to maintain a badass attitude when you’re exhausted.
“Of course we waited up for you.” Chloe answered, and Beca remembers seeing her lean forward in her seat, as if she was about to get up and walk over, but then her stupid roommate had interrupted them and the ‘moment’ or .. ugh.. whatever it was, had been ruined.
Later that night, after Aubrey had finished her ‘emergency Bella meeting’ and told them to all be at rehearsals the next day, 8 am sharp, they all left. Well, everyone except for Chloe.
Beca was fidgeting in her seat, aware of how close Chloe was standing next to her.
“I’m really sorry about tonight.” Chloe had said, then reached over and squeezed her shoulder briefly. “That we weren’t there for you, I mean.”
“I’m sorry too.” Beca replied, “I don’t know what I was thinking.”
“I thought it looked pretty badass.” Chloe said with a smile on her face and her eyes big and bright.
Beca awkwardly laughed at that. “Oh, well.. thanks, I guess.”
“You’re welcome.” She said it with the biggest smile on her face, only making Beca more uncomfortable.
“Well, I’ll just see you tomorrow then.” Beca then said, it wasn’t that she wanted to get rid of the other girl, she just didn’t really have anything else to say.
“Yes! Of course.” Chloe answered, walking over towards the door of Beca’s dorm room. Beca followed behind and opened up the door for the other girl.
“Once again,” the older girl said just as she was about to walk away, “I’m really sorry about not being there. I wanted to go to the station but Jesse stopped me. Makes sense actually, you probably wanted your boyfriend to be there instead of me.”  
“Jesse’s not my boyfriend.”
“Oh, okay, because Aubrey-“
“Yeah well, Aubrey is wrong about a lot of things.”
Chloe just smiled in response. Suddenly she was moving closer, and before Beca fully realized what was happening the other girl had wrapped her arms around her. Beca stood still for a second, surprised by the sudden move, then awkwardly brought one hand up to pat Chloe on the shoulder. She’d done this to her parents and usually, they’d back off and give her a tight smile. Chloe, however, just moved in closer. She pulled Beca flush against her, her hands on the other girls lower back, and Beca could practically feel her smiling against the side of her cheek. It was.. oddly nice. Beca finally stopped patting the redhead’s shoulder and just let her hand rest there, the other one still hanging loosely by her side.
Finally, Chloe pulled back, a big smile on her face. “Well, goodnight Beca.”
“Goodnight.” She’d whispered in response, not fully trusting her voice at that moment.
That moment was over five years ago.
Beca couldn’t believe it. Time was going by too fast.
She still often feels like that girl, but she also knows and sees in herself how much she has changed. She’s still badass, because of course, she’s Beca effin Mitchell after all, but she’ll allow herself the occasional smile. She lets her friends in too. Not all the time, but she trusts these girls, trusts them more than anything in life.
She’s living in Brooklyn, sharing a tiny apartment with Chloe and Amy. It’s not as bad as she thought it would be. The old Beca would never have done it, wouldn’t have even thought about it. She needs her space, craves time alone to recharge. But Beca™ kind of likes having her friends around. It’s nice to come home after a long day and find her friends sitting around their small table, clearly waiting for her to start dinner even though it’s late and they are probably starving. What’s nice as well is that every morning she wakes up and there’s a steaming cup of coffee sitting on her nightstand, courtesy of Chloe, who gets up a couple of hours before her every day.
It’s less nice that nobody likes cleaning, and that Amy likes to throw her stuff everywhere. It’s also not great that there are only two beds.
Not that she hates it, quite the opposite in fact.
Sharing a bed with Chloe Beale has been... eventful... to say the least.
First of all, she hogs the covers, like... all the time. And Beca gets really cold. She’s tiny, okay?! She likes wrapping herself up in blankets and being all warm but now she’ll usually wake up in the middle of the night, discovering that she has about 1% of the covers, and Chloe has the rest.
Secondly, Chloe is, well, Chloe. She tells you about her day in a whispered voice, offers to give you back massages like all the time (which Beca never accepts of course, but sometimes she gets close to saying yes and she’s afraid that one day she might). Chloe pokes her when she’s about to fall asleep and giggles when Beca stares at her as if she still is that girl Chloe met a little over five years ago. She also tells Beca about her dreams in detail every single day, because of course, she does.
But the absolute worst thing? Chloe loves to cuddle.
The first time it happened was by accident. Beca had been awake - and fucking freezing, thank you very much – when Chloe rolled over in her sleep (dragging all of the 99% of the covers with her) and had wrapped herself around Beca like she was some kind of koala.
It was kind of cute really.
Beca froze at first, but was honestly just relieved to have some of the covers back, plus it was Chloe, and Chloe hugged her all the time. She should be getting used to this right? Her heart shouldn’t be pounding. Yet it was.
After that day, it became kind of regular. The redhead would roll over in the middle of the night and they would cuddle. In the beginning, Beca would just lay still, not wanting to wake the other woman up, but after a while, she figured that moving her arm from underneath her to wrap it around the redhead wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world, right? Right..
So far, they haven’t talked about it. Beca can feel Chloe untangling herself from her in the morning, and sometimes she swears she can just feel the redhead’s gaze on her, as if she doesn’t want to move away from her.
It’s been going on for a couple of months now. Or well, had. They just got back from their USO tour and suddenly everything is weird. Like, weirder than fat Amy. Which is a lot.
Beca knows she’s got a crush on Chloe. She’s known for a long time. It’s part of the reason why she hated the cuddling so much in the beginning. Like eating ice cream when you’re lactose intolerant, it just makes the ice cream taste so much better. She always thought it didn’t mean anything though, like it was just a thing they did because they’re good friends and Chloe’s just like that. But now, now she’s not so sure anymore. Chloe had kissed Chicago… and now everything was different.
But Beca was freezing. It was cold in their small apartment and Chloe had stolen the covers from her. She was sad and cold and upset and just in an ‘old Beca’ mood. Part of her wanted to storm out, find Chicago and punch him for ruining whatever it was that was between them. But that wouldn’t make sense. Again, the new Beca was really taking over her life here. Which is exactly why she did the following.
The brunette scooted closer towards Chloe and sat up a little so that she could stare down at her. She’d never in their entire friendship initiated any kind of contact besides a ‘super-quick-does-it-even-count’ hug when she’s feeling extra happy, or well.. drunk. Or both.
Anyways, here she was, staring down at her friend. Chloe looked so peaceful, she almost wanted to give up and just embrace the coldness. Almost.
“Chloe.” She whispers then, not wanting to wake up the other girl in the room with them.
“Chlo.” She tries again, pushing a little on her shoulder. The other girl starts to stir and turns around slowly, now laying on her back facing Beca. Her eyes are still closed but she’s definitely waking up now.
“Bec? You okay?” She mumbles, sleep dripping from her voice.
“Uh..” Be brave, Beca, she thinks, “I’m kinda cold.”
“Oh. Sorry.” Chloe responds, opening her eyes a little to see what’s going on. She looks down, noticing how she has all the covers and unwraps them from around herself. She pushes them towards Beca and rolls back, facing the other way.
Beca just sits there, holding the covers. She really thought this was going to go differently. Shit. She stays quiet for a full two minutes, contemplating if she should ask or just go to sleep. She knows Chloe is still awake, her breathing hasn’t evened out yet.
“I’m still cold.” She says then, cursing herself for not being able to keep her voice steady.
Chloe sighs deeply, like she’s tired. Well, she obviously is, because it’s freaking 4:12 AM, but like a different kind of tired.  
“Do something about it then.” The redhead finally responds, her voice all low and absolutely beautiful.
Beca was quiet for a bit. “What? Like, run some laps or whatever?”
“Beca.” Chloe just says. But it’s enough. She understands.
The younger girl lets herself sink further under the covers, takes a deep breath and then scoots forward, closer towards Chloe, until she’s pressed up fully against her. She can feel her heart pounding in her chest because this is so different than anything they’ve done before. They’re spooning, like actually spooning. Beca tentatively wraps her arm around the other girl’s waist, noticing how Chloe sighs deeply, contently, and pushes herself even closer. Beca’s asleep within minutes.
They don’t talk about it the next day.
Chloe doesn’t move over towards her side when they’re in bed. She just turns around again and mumbles a ‘goodnight’ to Beca. No story, no poking, nothing.
She’s a little disappointed.
When she wakes up cold in the night she doesn’t hesitate this time. She’s cold and so tired that she doesn’t have the energy to care. She pulls the blankets up and slides in behind Chloe, confidently pulling the other girl against her. She stirs a little, and Beca swears she can see a small smile on her face. 
They’re a little tipsy. Not drunk, because they’re getting a little old for that shit, but tipsy for sure. They’re stumbling into the apartment, having just come back from a night out with the girls. It’s been 5 months since they got back from the tour now and a little over three weeks since Beca and Chloe last hugged. Chloe hasn’t been hogging the covers because the weather has been better and Beca feels weird doing it now. Plus, Chloe has Chicago, right? She’s not even sure. She hasn’t asked. She knows that makes her a horrible friend, but she’s never really been that girl anyways, the one who talks about boys and braids hair, so she figures Chloe can forgive her for not asking.
They stumble to the bed, trying to get rid of their clothes and put on their pajamas. Amy is still out, so at least they don’t have to worry about waking her up. Finally, after a bit of a struggle and a lot of giggling from Chloe, they’re in bed.
“Chloe. Chlo. Chlo.” Beca says, grinning widely.
“Oh my god, yes. What is it?” The other girl responds, rolling over to face her friend.
“Hugs.” Beca says, opening her arms and smiling at the redhead.
For a second she has a look on her face, like she’s trying to stop herself for whatever reason, but then she’s grinning widely and wrapping her arms around Beca in a way that she hasn’t done in a long time. Like she just decided not to care or whatever.
It’s an awkward position, with both of them laying on their side and stuff, but she’s not about to pull away. She’s missed this, missed feeling like she was the most important person in Chloe’s life. She knows that’s selfish, but she can’t help it. The redhead squeezes her even tighter for a second, then complains that her arm is getting tired and pulls back a little. Beca actually pouts.. like… what has she become?
They’re laying face to face now, and it reminds her of hood night, all those years ago. It makes her chuckle.
“What?” Chloe asks, clearly confused.
“Just…” Beca responds, then leans her forehead against Chloe's “I think that we’re gonna be really fast friends.”
Chloe laughs softly. “Just when I thought you were becoming all nice and stuff.”
Beca ignores the comment, and instead glances down at Chloe’s lips. “I thought that you were going to kiss me.”
“Sorry?”
“That night, I thought you were going to kiss me.”
It’s quiet for a few seconds, and Beca thinks that maybe Chloe’s falling asleep, or just decided to ignore it. She hates herself for saying it now.
“I was, at first.” She suddenly says, causing Beca’s eyes to widen.
“Uh-Wha-How-Why?” She stutters.
Chloe smiles. “You ask too many questions. I don’t know, I uh- I guess I just wanted to. I changed my mind though.”
Beca takes a deep breath, now avoiding the redhead’s eyes. The alcohol is giving her the courage she needs and she pushes herself to say: “I wish you had.”
Chloe seems taken aback by that, pulling away a little and looking into Beca’s eyes. Her eyes shift then, landing on her lips. “Do you- do you still want to?”
“I uh-“
“Oh.” Chloe responds, as if she’s got her answer.
“Chloe, let me talk. I do want to but uh- I uh- this is hard.”
“It’s really not.”
She pushes forward then, pressing their lips together. Beca gets lost in the feeling for a minute. Chloe’s lips move against her, closed and so so soft. It takes everything in her to push the other girl away softly.
“Wait. Please.”
Chloe just stares at her, confused but giving her time to think. 
“I don’t want to experiment. Or whatever.”
“Why are you saying that?”
“The lodge? You mentioned-“
“Oh, right. I had forgotten about that.”
Beca chuckles. “I haven’t. Kinda haven’t stopped thinking about it.” She blushes then, realizing that she probably shouldn’t have said that. “Point is, I don’t want something like that. I uh- I really like you, Chloe, like really. I do want to kiss you, but if you’re just doing this because you’re drunk or want to have fun, or you know, experiment, then I can’t do it.”
She looks down at her own hands beneath the covers, laying close to one of Chloe’s. “I can’t do it. It’ll break me.”
“Becs.” She says, tilting the other girls chin up. “I really really like you too, okay? I’ve wanted to kiss you for a long time. So can I, please?”
She wants to say yes, but there’s still something bothering him. “What about Chicago, aren’t you two…?”
“We were never anything. He was just.. fun.. I don’t know. I guess I thought that maybe if I pretended to like him I actually would and then I could just get over you. It didn’t work, and I’m sorry.”
“Sorry for what?”
“For hurting you, for being stupid. I just- I never know with you, Beca. You’re so closed off.”
“I’m working on it.” 
“I know, softy.” 
“Hey!” She says, smiling, then turns serious, “Is that why you were suddenly pulling away from me, by the way? Not uh- hugging me and stuff?”
Chloe nods. “It was too much.”
“Like ice cream, huh?”
“I’m sorry, what?”
“When you’re lactose intolerant.”
“You’re weird.”
“Well, you’re weirder, and I would really like to kiss you now.”
Chloe chuckles and wraps a hand around Beca’s neck to pull her closer. Their lips meet and the brunette can’t help but moan into the kiss instantly, so glad that this is finally happening. Eventually, Chloe’s tongue traces her bottom lip and she gasps into the kiss, opening her mouth. The older woman uses the moment to slide her tongue into Beca’s mouth, deepening the kiss. They’re both moaning now, Chloe’s hands sliding underneath Beca’s pajama top to trace her stomach muscles. The other girl smiles into the kiss, then rolls them both over so that she’s on top of Chloe now. She slides her own hands under Chloe’s shirt and up until they reach her bra. She moves her lips away from her mouth to nip at her neck. She pulls back a little as her hand slides even higher.
“Is this too fast?” She asks, a little breathless.
“Becs, it’s been five years. I think we’ve waited long enough for each other.”
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chloes-yellow-cup · 7 years ago
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Nowish - Part 2
Bechloe. Staubrey. Bellas Squared/Stechlobree.
A story in which I convinced myself by accident that this could work. Let me try and convince you too.
Nowish Master Post  - Everything on one page.
A Shared Lifetime  - All my fics
Recommended Mood Music on Spotify. Artistic license taken with song release years.
Note on the links: The ones about music lead to YouTube vids for fun. Rest are GIFs or links to whatever gift idea I have.
Some reflection and a flashback.
~C~
Saturday, March 11th, 2017
Chloe was up first the next morning and she eased gently out of bed to avoid waking Beca. She took a quick shower and pulled on her robe to go downstairs to start breakfast. As she tried to decide between making something or just cereal with some fruit, she replayed the end of the evening over in her mind while starting a pot of coffee.
It wasn’t really anything unusual; there had always been sexual innuendos and jokes between the four of them. But normally it was anyone but Beca making them. Aubrey was far more inclined to play along, mostly because she loved to fluster the living hell out of Beca. Which Chloe always found amusing because Beca was far dirtier than the rest of them knew, she was just uncomfortable letting it out in front of anyone but Chloe. Well, at least until now.
But last night… It had sounded like Beca had propositioned Stacie. In a quasi-serious way. And Chloe was extremely intrigued by that, especially since Beca knew it was a package deal, no matter who the words were actually spoken to.
Chloe settled on cereal and fruit, pulling out a bowl and a box of Special K. Setting them on the counter, she retrieved the milk from the fridge and grabbed a banana from the dish on the center island. She hummed idly as prepped her cereal and sliced the banana over it. Finally she added the milk and put it away.  Looking out the window she decided to eat by the pool because it was such a lovely morning. She poured herself a large mug of coffee and grabbed a spoon from the drawer before taking everything outside. Settling at one of unshaded tables they had set up, she took the first sip from her mug before starting on her cereal to the sound of birds in the trees around her.
Chloe had always been an open person. She had by no means been easy, despite her lack of boundaries when it came to the personal space of a certain brunette college freshman. She was always very careful with whom she was intimate and she thoroughly enjoyed her time with them. And while she’d never actually had sex with more than one person at a time, it wasn’t something she’d have turned her nose up at with the right people involved. So her first instinct was not jealousy at the thought that Beca may have been serious last night.
It wasn’t as if Chloe hadn’t briefly thought of it back when they had first moved to LA and Stacie had joked about sleeping together. Though ‘joke’ wasn’t really the right word, as if all parties had actually agreed, she was sure they’d have been in bed two minutes later. So of course Chloe had thought about it. It may also have circled her brain whenever she realized it was about time for one of Stacie’s quarterly nudges, and it may have gotten a bit more detailed as the four of them had become closer than she’d have thought possible prior to the move. But she’d never actually, really, sat down and thought about it before.
She knew that she and Beca were secure in their relationship after all they’d been through the last five years. Their time at Barden had created a very solid and deep foundation, despite their occasional rocky moments. The time in LA plus the almost full year as a married couple made for a sturdy and safe space.
While she also felt almost as close to Aubrey and Stacie, they would never be quite as important to her as Beca. But sitting in the morning sun in their might-as-well-be-shared back yards, she let herself consciously think of all of them in a bed together. Living with all of them at one time or another, she knew all too well what the other couple looked like naked, making it easy to envision when she opened that closed door in her mind. Still, the quickness of the wash of heat that prickled her skin took her a bit by surprise.  She quickly shut the door again, but not before half a dozen images pushed past and rolled around behind her eyes.
‘Alright, mission accomplished. I guess I know how I feel about the idea at a purely physical level.’
She forced herself to concentrate on her breathing until she was able to push the visuals away. For a minute she’d been afraid she’d have to jump in the pool to cool down. But, gradually, the peace of the morning helped her determination to look at it from a logical perspective. She finished her cereal and leaned back to sip her coffee, staring into the clear waters of their pool.
If she were willing to let anyone into their bed, it most definitely wouldn’t be some stranger. It couldn’t be anyone that Chloe and Beca didn’t trust implicitly. It also had to be someone that wouldn’t try to come between them – not that any of their friends and acquaintances would or a stranger could. ‘Bloe is real’ as Amy had said at their wedding.
And, to Chloe, it made sense to have it be another couple. Someone who would also be in it just for the fun and experience. Someone as devoted to their partner as much as Beca and Chloe were to each other. And, if that’s the ‘rule’ she was setting, that really did leave only Aubrey and Stacie.
Chloe smiled to herself, glad her friends had found each other, though it had been difficult for the longest time. Stacie was actually a year younger than the rest of the Bellas, having graduated from high school a year early. While Aubrey had been intrigued by the confident, yet gropey, girl in auditions, she’d shut down when she’d realized that Stacie was only 17. Chloe would bring up, every chance she got, that Stacie was obviously very smart and extremely mature for her age, more so than most of the freshmen on campus.
It was a conversation they’d had almost as much as the one they’d had every time Aubrey threatened to kick Beca out of the Bellas. Chloe had never been so happy to have someone’s birthday so soon after Christmas, because then Aubrey no longer had the ‘But she’s underage, Chloe!’ argument to use once January 9th rolled around. But, Aubrey’s own insecurities stacked with Stacie’s admittedly adamant desire to refer to her vagina as the Hunter and let ‘him’ roam free across campus. So Aubrey graduated and left without ever actually saying anything to Stacie about her feelings. Feelings that Stacie was not immune to, just not entirely prepared for.
Then they had reconnected at the retreat.
  After the rest of the girls had left the campfire, Chloe had promised Beca she’d be right in, but she needed to talk to Aubrey for a second. Once all the girls were out of sight, she’d turned back to Aubrey. “Sooooooooooooo…” Aubrey narrowed her eyes, waiting for the other shoe to drop. “Are you ever going to date someone seriously?”
Aubrey’s response was instant. “I date!”
“I said seriously.” Chloe held up her hand when Aubrey opened her mouth. “You literally ran away to hide in the woods so you don’t have to really date anyone serious because you can’t, or won’t, date Stacie.” She hated using a drunken confession to make her point, but she just wanted Aubrey to be happier than Chloe knew she was.
“You don’t play fair.” Aubrey stared into the fire, a faint blush covering her cheeks. “Ok. I don’t date.” She sighed. “And now… it’s too late.”
A voice out of the darkness made them both jump. “I wouldn’t say that.” Stacie walked back out of shadows. “Maybe it’s time we talk, yeah?”
Chloe reined in her natural desire to clap with joy and stood up. “I’ll just…” and she pointed toward the direction of the tent before she patted Aubrey on the shoulder and gave it a squeeze.
She didn’t know what they’d talked about for the longest time and it had killed Chloe to not share it with Beca, but it wasn’t her story to tell. And it wasn’t until Aubrey had come to visit them just before Worlds that Chloe found out they’d been texting. Often. She felt silly about it later, as while she’d noticed that Stacie was staying in and not going on her dates, she hadn’t put together what it meant. She found out later that Beca had also given Aubrey a kick while the rest of the Bellas were getting ready at Worlds.
Beca had found Aubrey staring after Stacie as the brunette helped everyone with their makeup. Beca had nudged her former captain and told her to go get the girl. “Emily just kissed Benji, you should totally just go lay one on her while she’s got her makeup handy to fix whatever you muss up.”
“I… I don’t know, Beca. What if being with me isn’t enough?” Aubrey was characteristically anxious and uncertain. Beca had told Chloe it had made her sad that Aubrey didn’t see herself the way the rest of them did.
Beca captured her gaze. “Posen. Get your head out of your ass. It’s not a hat.” She grinned cheekily when Aubrey actually growled at her, and then grew serious again. “Seriously, Bree. Don’t fuck this up. Make it real already. We need you both.”
When they’d run off the stage as World freaking Champions, Aubrey had been waiting. And ready. She’d swept Stacie into her arms and kissed her. The rest of the girls had gone crazy, their already loud cheers hitting decibels that would leave them a bit hoarse the next day.
  Chloe smiled to herself, the echoes of “Staubrey Lives” floating through her mind. So, yes – the two women living behind them were closer to her than anyone but her wife and she loved them both very much. They were literally the only people that she would accept if she and Beca decided to try this adventure. She just wasn’t fully certain how to broach the subject with her sometimes still prickly wife, but knew she’d have to find the right time.
“What are you smiling about?”
Chloe looked up as the voice interrupted her train of thought. “Morning, Bree.” She pushed the chair next to her a little bit with her foot, her robe riding high up her thigh, but still keeping things modest. “Nothing, just enjoying the morning.”
“Why don’t I believe you?” Aubrey settled into the chair with her own coffee.
“Maybe because it’s a lie.” But Chloe wasn’t ready to talk about this with anyone but Beca yet. “I was just remembering Worlds. And the events right after.” Her lips twisted in a teasing smile.
Aubrey smiled back. “I’m so glad you guys both kicked my ass into gear. Best decision of my life.”
“You mean, after joining the Bellas.” Chloe corrected. Aubrey nodded and raised her Bella mug slightly in agreement. “I forget, did you guys have any plans for the weekend?”
The two friends fell into easy conversation until their wives stumbled out groggily to join them, almost in sync, having woken up lonely in bed.
   ~B~
Saturday, August 5th, 2016
Ever since the ‘couple time’ rule had gone into effect, Stacie had casually, here and there, tried to work Aubrey up to the point where Aubrey, of all people, forgot to put up the equivalent of a sock on the door. Beca was almost positive it was more to see if Stacie could instead of just trying to ‘give Bloe a show’ as Cynthia Rose had once said.
The Bellas had all come to visit a few weeks before the Posen-Conrad wedding and had spread across both houses. They’d almost emptied the local liquor store by the time they left, but they had greatly enjoyed themselves and spent the days wandering between kitchens, pool and hot tub. Where they slept depended on how drunk they were at the end of the day and if they could walk from one house to the other without falling in the pool.
One night, Ashley had leaned over the edge of the pool chair and asked, “Ok, but how often do you guys walk in on each other because you never lock the door?”
“Oh, it gets locked when… that… happens.” Aubrey took another drink of her beer.
“Yeah, now.” Stacie replied. When Ashley twirled her finger for more information, she continued. “Aubrey almost walked in on Bloe getting wild in their living room a few weeks after we moved in.” The rest of the girls hooted, holding up their drinks in salute. Beca just bowed her head and waved her hand regally through the air. “So Bree declared the rule.”
Beca snorted. “Besides, if Stacie’s super determined, she’d just pick the lock.”
Stacie shrugged. “Eh.”
Flo asked, “But do you always remember?”
“Aubrey does.” Chloe looked over at her friend. “But, I admit, Beca and I may forget once or twice.”
“Chloe!” Aubrey looked scandalized.
“Sorry Bree, but sometimes things go a little fast and the next thing I know, I’m completely naked on the stairs.” Chloe shrugged helplessly.
“Oh my god.” Aubrey covered her eyes as laughter surrounded them. “Why would you try and put that in my head.”
“Well, shit. I can’t let Beca outsex me. That’s like a direct challenge to the Hunter.” Stacie looked over at Aubrey, considering. “I may have to step up my game.” And though Aubrey tried to look displeased, it’s not like the thought of more sex with her fiancé was ever going to be a bad thing.
“Yeah, sure, you just wanna give Bloe a show.” Cynthia Rose looked slyly at Stacie. “We heard about all them orgy jokes you make, girl.”
“Hey, in all fairness, they’re totally hot and Beca ordered The Expanse.” Stacie ignored Aubrey’s swatting hand. “What else am I supposed to think about?”
“What’s ‘The Expanse?’”  It took several tries before they heard what Lilly was asking.
“Oh, that’s what I call Beca’s GIANT fucking bed.” Stacie’s eyes widened dramatically as her arms stretched out their full length. “You’ve seen it. It’s fucking huge.”
Beca interrupted. “Hey, I didn’t get the biggest size they had... Just the second. It’s only 9 feet across and like, two and a halfish high.”
Chloe shook her head. “Don’t let her fool you, it wouldn’t fit in the bedroom or we’d totes have a 12 foot bed.”
Beca shrugged. “Got me there.”
“Damn it, now that’s going to show up in my mind when I least expect it.” Jessica shook her head. “Not that I’m really complaining.” When the others all stared at her, she got defensive. “What? It’s kinda hot! You can’t tell me it isn’t!”
Ashley nodded from beside her, smiling. “You’re not wrong.” She winked at Chloe who returned it. “They’re totally hot.”
Beca chimed in for the first time. “Can we talk about something other than my sex life?”
“Oh, so wait – now it’s actually part of your sex life? I thought you guys hadn’t done the dirty yet?” Amy made a show of widening her eyes. “Shawshank, I thought you told me everything!”
Beca stuttered out, “That’s not… we haven’t…”
Chloe’s teasing voice came from behind her. “Why, Beca. What does Amy mean she thought we hadn’t ‘yet’? What are you telling her that I don’t know?”
Beca blushed furiously. “I… that’s… no. I… I’m getting a beer.” She made her way to her kitchen instead of the cooler on the patio, smiling to herself at how much she missed these girls even when they made her crazy. 
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anna-kendrick · 4 years ago
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In an alternate reality where Beca and Chloe were happily loved up and married, Beca died either because of an accident or something else.
In that reality, do you think Chloe would ever be able to move on and find love again or do you think she would see out the rest of her days waiting to be reunited with Beca?
I can totally picture a scenario where Aubrey and Stacie and the other Bella’s try to help Chloe find love again so she isn’t lonely, but it just makes Chloe angry because as far as she’s concerned, she’s not lonely, she’s heartbroken and filling an empty space isn’t going to fix that for her.
I could maybe see her finding a friend or a companion in someone she meets at grief counselling group or something, but strictly in a platonic way. Especially if she and Beca had a kid(s). She’d focus on them rather than finding love again.
What do you think?
i think that of the two, chloe would be the other to find solace in a relationship maybe.. do i think she'll ever fully heal? that she'll ever move on from beca? absolutely not, and i think she'd always refer to beca as an important person in her life.
i think that if she and beca had kids together, that she'd most likely wait it out until the kids are grown, and that she wouldn't go looking.. but i think if the right person came along that she may go along with it but while taking things slow (definitely years after beca's passing tho)
i know it wasn't the question, but if it were chloe passing, i don't think beca would ever open herself back up to love.. i think she'd close herself off forever
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beca-mitchell · 6 years ago
Text
remember the day, pt. 11
Summary: Chloe’s birthday creeps up on them.
Also on AO3.
Word count: 3,861.
My recommended songs for this chapter are: Things I'd Do For U - Astronomyy; I Can't Fall In Love Without You - Zara Larsson.
Check out this fic’s soundtrack here.
part 1 (intro/prompt) | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8 | part 9 | part 10 | part 11 | part 12
Chloe whispers into the quiet air of Beca’s bedroom, "Tell me a story.”
It surprises Beca and maybe Chloe, a little, too because she stiffens as soon as it leaves her lips. Beca just focuses on holding Chloe’s hand a little tighter, tugging her close.
“What kind of story?” Beca asks curiously. “About work? A famous person I met?”
“No,” Chloe says softly. Slowly. She breathes steadily. “A story about us."
Beca stares up at the ceiling, sifting through a thousand memories all at once. She has no particular favourites because they all compete for the same level of affection. Beca only has affection to give when it comes to her memories of her life with Chloe, however, so she takes care in selecting a few.
Heaving a sigh – neither sad or resigned – Beca begins.
Lying in their bed, Beca tells Chloe about how she had feigned liking pineapples on pizza because Beca had enjoyed pineapple on pizza. She tells Chloe about how she brought Chloe to an album release party once and Chloe had spent the entire night chatting with one of the more senior record execs without realizing who he was. Beca had been horrified at first, but she relaxed seeing how at ease Chloe had been with her co-workers and industry professionals.
There was yet another time that Beca recalls, on a laugh, where Chloe’s family cat had been so suspicious of Beca at first and Beca spent nearly one entire day trying to get that damn cat to like her. By the end of that trip, Marshmallow had given a stamp of approval, clawing at Beca’s jeans and refusing to let her go.
As Beca talks, she finds herself unable to stop because it feels so freeing to finally share these memories with Chloe. In no way will she ever fault Chloe for not knowing or asking earlier because they both wanted time to exist as themselves again after the accident, but God, she only feels herself falling more in love with Chloe with each passing breath she takes. When she had proposed, she didn’t know that it would bepossible to fall in love with Chloe more than she already was, but there’s so much that she loves and appreciates about every moment she gets to spend by Chloe’s side, even if it’s just breathing steadily and remembering what it’s like to so truly feel for another person.
And Chloe – Chloe drifts to the sound of Beca’s voice in her ear, quiet and intimate in the confines of the bedroom that they once called their own.
Gradually, as Beca finds her little anecdotes are winding down, Chloe's breathing grows heavy. It evens out slowly and she musters up enough strength to press a kiss against Beca’s cheek. “I love you,” she says, signalling the beginning of her slumber.
"I love you, too, Chlo," Beca murmurs, feeling a heavy sleepiness fall over her as well.
She can’t wait for tomorrow.
Beca spent so much time trying to figure out how to just live day-to-day, but there’s something so permanent and enduring about how she feels about Chloe and how they’re living, especially now. It’s hope, love, and immense gratitude all rolled into one.
They don’t begin their days with good mornings or end their nights with good night - not anymore. It’s all in the “I love you” they exchange with surety and confidence and Beca has never felt luckier.
This is real.
They weren't young adults fresh out of college. They had fallen in love twice in one lifetime.
Falling in love with Chloe the first time around had been ridiculous with how it crept on Beca and exploded around her, but that had been then . Even with that knowledge and the memories of being with Chloe, falling in love with her a second time was completely different and more intimate. It was an addition, if anything.
Everything had evened out relatively even if the memory of the accident still echoed in Beca’s mind like a replayable nightmare.
We’re happy.
To Beca, even as she drifts off fully, this is a point where she can look back and finally feel okay ; she can finally look back and see the entirety of the mountain - the majority of it, at least.
And with Chloe by her side, it seems like the rest of the trek is finally doable.
It’s all about reaching that peak in which Beca can see the potential for a story to tell people and share with them this triumph in their lives together.
It's the kind of story that she would like to tell their children.
One day.
Beca hasn’t allowed herself to think about that in a while.
One day.
“Bec?”
Beca hums in response.
“I love you,” Chloe says, propping her chin on her hand. She reaches out to play with the strands of hair that fall from Beca’s bun.
Beca stifles a smile, focusing on writing her email to her co-worker. “Thank you very much,” she replies lightly.
Chloe makes an aggravated sound and pokes Beca’s ear as best as she can. She shuffles her chair closer and tucks herself into Beca’s side as best as she can, sliding one hand up her thigh and the other around her waist. “I love you,” she murmurs again. “You’re not gonna say it back to me then?”
It’s on the tip of her tongue. Beca loves telling Chloe she loves her – she adores everything about being in love with Chloe Beale.
She also loves teasing the hell out of her fiancée.
“Maybe later,” she mumbles, resisting the urge to turn to Chloe and kiss her senseless. It doesn’t help that Chloe is currently kissing her neck.
“Later?” Chloe repeats.
“Maybe tomorrow.”
“I can’t believe I agreed to marry you,” Chloe says, finally giving in and reaching up to cup Beca’s cheek. She turns her head gently and leans in to press a slow, sensual kiss against her lips. “I should rethink this engagement,” Chloe murmurs, happy to have distracted Beca from her work when she feels Beca’s hands around her waist. She pushes at Beca’s shoulders forcing her to slide her chair back and moves to straddle her thighs, draping her arms over her shoulders.
“I’d believe you if you weren’t currently trying to seduce me or the fact that you just told me you loved me.”
Chloe snorts at that. Her gaze softens and she moves to rest her forehead against Beca’s. “I love you,” she says. “Even when you’re being completely annoying.”
Beca’s laugh is light. Finally, she gives in. “I love you, too. So much. Don’t you forget it, Beale.”
She knows Chloe won’t.
It’s starting to feel like summer. Even though it’s the beginning of June, Chloe loves the cool breeze it brings with it even if there are some unbearable hot moments.
She has all but moved back in with Beca, but there’s something about the apartment that doesn’t quite feel like it’s their own anymore and she knows that Beca feels similarly. Chloe runs her fingers over familiar ridges and shelves, but she feels nothing too strikingly sad or happy as she does so.
It just... is.
They’re preparing for a weekend away at a beach house rented out for Chloe’s birthday in a couple weeks. She feels giddy and excited, mostly at the thought of spending evenings cuddled up next to Beca with the sand all around them. She’s excited that Beca wrangled Aubrey and Amy and a few other Bellas to join them, though she had been adamant that they get a beach house with distinctly separate rooms.
Chloe rifles through her drawers, trying to figure out where she misplaced her favourite t-shirt. She’s sure she left it at Beca’s from the last time she stayed over, but she’s having some difficulty locating it.
“Chlo,” Beca calls. “I did some of your laundry with my own.” She holds up the t-shirt. “Looking for this?”
Chloe grins, leaping into Beca’s arms. “Thank you. Life saver.”
“You should just move in again,” Beca says, laughing. It’s lighthearted and free, like she’s joking, but Chloe isn’t when she pauses and seriously thinks about it.
“Okay,” she agrees quietly after a moment.
Beca is trying to kiss her when she draws back, like she’s unsure if she imagined that. “What?”
“Okay,” Chloe repeats. “Let’s...I’ll move back in.”
“I...I’m - I was just joking,” Beca attempts to say, but it’s weak and her eyes are wide. She’s also a little slackjawed.
“I’m not,” Chloe assures her. “I...I would love to move back in. If you’ll have me.”
Beca makes a kind of strange high-pitched squeak before she’s tackling Chloe into a hug and burying her face into her neck.
Chloe hugs her back, laughing delightedly. “So, that’s a yes, right?”
Beca pinches her side and they tumble onto the bed.
They don’t actually figure it out so soon, but it’s on the table and in their plans for the future. That’s enough for Chloe.
Though -
Chloe I want you to help me with something.
Aubrey This better be good.
Chloe It is, I promise.
Aubrey I was just kidding...but I’m intrigued now. I’m in.
It’s a good birthday - great, even. Chloe loves being around people who make her laugh like no tomorrow.
Beyond that, she loves how often Beca smiles.
She catches Beca in a similar state of mind, based on how often Beca is staring right at her, often with an expression of love or awe or something in between.
As they sit around the fire pit, at their little slice of the beach for the weekend, Chloe stares around at the people she loves - the people she has come to love. She feels a swell of affection rush through her because this is her family. Her parents, her brother - she has always known this to be true that they are her family in blood and their endless support.
But she has learned that family comes in spades, especially from people who are willing to be there for her time and time again.
They’re sharing memories when Chloe tunes back into the conversation.
Chloe looks down at the blanket covering both hers and Beca’s laps, fiddling with a loose string. As she fiddles, Beca’s hand comes up to caress hers, covering her hand fully. It makes Chloe smile and she only tugs Beca closer even though they’re already both warm from the gently crackling fire in front of them. Tilting back, she can feel Beca’s steady breathing against her and the sure comfort of Beca’s arm wrapped around her back, her hand stroking comfortably at her hip.
Beca is the promise of everything wonderful – the promise that Chloe’s life would forever be good , so long as she remembered that Beca Mitchell was it for her. There is no comparison, no compromise in Chloe’s mind these days. She can’t imagine anything else.
And even though the occasional stab of pain comes with the reminder that there are truly memories she will never see or recall again, Chloe finds strength in the promise - both from Beca and one she made to herself – that it didn't matter she no longer has those memories. It’s because she has Beca, Beca has her, and that alone is enough – better than any memory.
Beca holds her closer, pressing a kiss to the top of her head, like she senses Chloe’s brief inner turmoil. Chloe squeezes her eyes shut, focusing on breathing deeply for the moment and how nice it feels to just be wrapped up in Beca’s arms.
"Chloe, why are you crying?" Aubrey asks, eyes softening. She says it quietly like she doesn’t really intend on letting everybody else hear, but it alerts everybody and they all turn to her with a concerned expression.
"Oh,” Chloe murmurs. She hadn’t even realized she had been shedding tears. She smiles a little wistfully at Beca who fixes her with a loving gaze. “No reason. I’m just happy to be here. Also, that wine was pretty strong,” she says to Amy.
Chloe finds it amusing how readily they all accept that explanation.
Their friends nod and get back to their conversation, but Chloe tunes out. She smiles at Beca, less tearful than before, her heart filling itself to the brim when Beca tugs her hand to her lips to press the gentlest of kisses to her knuckles. Then, she mouths the words that had once terrified Chloe to the core: I love you .
Chloe knows.
She kisses Beca, to the soundtrack of their friends cooing and cheering them on.
She wouldn’t have it any other way.
Chloe drags Beca out to sit with her on the beach to watch the sunset when their friends are busy amassing swathes of alcohol for a night of drinking.
She wants this quiet moment with her girlfriend, just for a moment before they have to return to reality.
She thinks that Beca looks adorable in her zip-up sweater and leggings.
“Tell me a story about us,” she says to Beca when they’ve settled comfortably.
“Again?” Beca laughs a little. “Okay, what would you like to know?”
“Tell me...about the first time we met.”
“You’ve heard it before,” Beca points out.
“I know. But I feel like I’ve heard it from other people. What were you thinking, then?”
“Okay, okay. I…” Beca blows out some air, ruffling a strand of hair that fell into her face just moments ago. “I know the first time we met was at the activities fair, whatever Aubrey told you. But the first time I really...I really consider to be our first time meeting would have to be when you accosted me in the showers at my residence hall.”
Chloe bursts out laughing. “What?” Pause. “No, wait, sounds about right.”
“Yeah, you’re fucking crazy,” Beca mutters, though there’s no bite at all. Chloe grins. “You just kind of burst into my shower and asked me tosing with you.”
“Why would I do that?” Chloe asks thoughtfully, like this is a legitimate academic inquiry. Beca giggles at the mindful expression on her face.
“I mean, you heard me singing or something. And you wanted me to audition for the Bellas.”
“Oh, well that makes sense,” Chloe says, still thoughtful. “You have such a beautiful voice.”
It’s so unexpectedly sincere and lacking all humour because of how serious Chloe is with that sentence that Beca reels for a moment. “Thank you,” she replies quietly.
“What happened next?”
“And we just...sang together. Titanium,” she points out, feeling less of a pang now than she might have just months ago. “It was popular at the time.”
“I love that song,” Chloe admits, recalling the time they sang together on the balcony.
Beca nods, sucking in a breath of air. “And...I guess I just love that memory a lot even though you freaked me the fuck out back when it happened. I just think about how far we’ve come and how stupid I was to deny how attracted I was to you, even then.”
Chloe hums, pleased. “I like that story.”
“I like you,” Beca says, feeling her own eyes well out with unexpected tears. They’re not particularly sad. Just from the excess of emotion. “I love you,” she amends.
“I love you, too,” Chloe says, reaching for Beca to kiss her. “Thank you for making this birthday incredible. And don’t bother denying how much work you put into it.”
Beca laughs, digging her fingers into the fabric of Chloe’s sweater. “Happy birthday, baby,” she murmurs, deepening the kiss momentarily. She squeezes her eyes shut, willing herself not to cry because of how incredibly happy she feels at the moment.
When she pulls back, Chloe is looking no worse for wear, if not a little teary. Her cheeks are a little flushed and the sun is already casting a beautiful glow upon the side of her face.
“I have a story about us,” Chloe says softly, interrupting Beca’s assessment of her features. “And I hope to remember it for the rest of my life, so I’m going to tell you about it right now.”
Beca thinks she might cry again because of how intimate this all feels suddenly. She focuses on just staring right into Chloe’s eyes and nodding slowly along.
“What’s your story?” Beca asks, wonder on her face. “What did you remember?”
“It’s not so much something that I remembered,” Chloe says slowly. She unhooks the chain around her neck, holding out the engagement ring for Beca to look at.
“You’re…giving me your engagement ring?” Beca asks slowly, like she’s not sure whether she should be hurt or hopeful.
“Just to hold,” Chloe says gently. “I’ve read that inscription so many times since you gave it to me. I’ve memorized how it feels and imagined countless times what must have been going through your mind when you first had it made for me. For us.”
“To look at you is to remember love,” Beca echoes, repeating the engraving she memorized so long ago. “It’s true,” she says on a sniffle.
Chloe smiles, her own eyes beginning to water. She hates it when Beca cries. “I know this was a weekend meant to be spent with our friends – the friends you worked so hard to reintroduce to me and bring back into my life.”
“It’s your birthday,” Beca can’t help but say, reaching out to cup Chloe’s cheek. “Of course we want to spend time with you.”
“Beca,” Chloe warns, a smile on her lips. The ocean breeze ruffles Beca’s hair a little and she can’t help but reach out and tuck the errant strand away because all she wants to do is look at Beca’s face, unobstructed for once - unobstructed by self-doubt, lingering worries, pain, headaches - all the plights of the past year or so.
Chloe has never felt happier to be alive and she’s so glad that she gets to come home to Beca every day.
“Sorry,” Beca murmurs. She bites her lip, as if physically restraining herself from speaking. Chloe can’t resist, so she leans in, digging her hands into the sand and presses a kiss against Beca’s lips, if only to soothe her momentarily.
“As I was saying, this engraving has meant everything to me over the past year and I’m sure it meant a lot to me back then as well. We don’t...really talk about the things I can’t remember,” Chloe says slowly. “And that’s okay.”
“That’s okay,” Beca echoes, reaching for Chloe’s hand. She doesn’t seem to care there’s sand all over it. She weaves their fingers together.
“I...don’t think I’m ever going to remember everything, Beca,” Chloe says, like she has a thousand times before. “Some things will never come back. Maybe the memory of how you proposed to me the first time will be one of those lost memories. But, I don’t want us to be sad about that - not anymore.” She waits for Beca to nod. “This story that I want to share with you, it starts from the moment I opened my eyes in that hospital bed and had no idea who you were. Even then, I knew that you were somebody important, regardless of whether I remembered that you and I were engaged.”
“Chloe,” Beca says thickly, choking on a sob.
“And, since then, you have never wavered, not once. I have never felt more comfortable to be myself and it’s all thanks to you. You make me better. You make everything about our relationship better. You make us better and I can tell that it’s the same for all the people in our lives.” She gestures around the admittedly empty beach. “You have...touched every single person in our lives, I hope you know that.”
“I mean, so have you,” Beca murmurs. “Everybody you meet thinks you’re incredible.”
Chloe smiles, touched by Beca’s ability to constantly parry a compliment with her own. “This is all just to say that I am so in love with you, Beca Mitchell.” She digs into the pocket of her hoodie, feeling around for just a moment. “I know we can’t recapture everything completely, but that’s not the point. The point is, this is the story from here on out. Today, as I celebrate another year in my life, I want to know that you and I are in this together forever. Do you know how lucky I am to have experienced love with you twice?"
Beca inhales sharply at that, beginning to cry in earnest.
"You have always been there, helping me rewrite and reread my story when I couldn’t find the words.”
With a trembling hand, she pulls out the ring she had managed to wrangle from pursuing and locating some of her own funds from before the accident. It’s a delicate princess cut with a shiny, simple band.
“You don’t have to give me back my engagement ring, not yet,” Chloe says gently over Beca’s quiet crying. “I just want you to know that I want to spend the rest of my life with you because life’s too short and I don’t want to wait another day.”
She doesn’t have time to say anything else because Beca’s arms are around her neck and she’s pushing Chloe back in the sand, crying into her neck while simultaneously pressing kisses over whatever skin she can find. Chloe holds fast to the small box, reaching up to tangle her fingers into Beca’s hair.
Finally, Beca’s lips seek out her own and they’re kissing as gently as they had for their first kiss or even their second first kiss.
Now, Chloe thinks this could constitute as a third first kiss - the one that is irrevocably imbued with the knowledge that they’re going to make it.
“Yes, by the way,” Beca mumbles against her mouth. “Yes, I’ll marry you.” She can’t muster more words, even if her brain is screaming at her to say something more.
I’ve always been ready to marry you, even back when I didn’t have the words to say how I felt about you. Even back when you didn't know a thing about me.
“That’s good,” is all Chloe can think to say now that her words have seemingly run out. She pauses, propping open the box so Beca can look at the ring. “There’s an engraving of my own,” she murmurs. “It’s simple, but.” She resists the urge to shrug self-consciously.
Beca takes the box with her own trembling hand and peers at the band as best as she can in the dying sunlight.
There, as clear as day, reads the inscription: I remember.
Beca looks like she might burst into a fresh onslaught of tears, so Chloe quickly takes the box back and removes the ring. “May I?”
“Yes,” Beca says quietly, again. Together, they watch the ring slide onto Beca’s finger and it glints beautifully in the pink and orange of the sunset. “This is my favourite story,” she admits, unable to tear her eyes from her hand. She’s not really looking at the ring so much as she’s looking at the way Chloe’s hand is gently holding hers and the fact that Chloe had put a ring on her finger at all.
I’ll never forget this, she thinks.
Aloud, “I’ll always remember this moment,” Beca assures Chloe.
And with a deep inhale, Chloe says, “Me too.”
tbc // fic tag
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beca-mitchell · 6 years ago
Text
remember the day, pt. 9
Summary: Back in L.A. and everything that brings.
Also on AO3.
Word count: 3,116
Recommended songs: Mine - Bazzi
Check out this fic’s soundtrack here.
part 1 (intro/prompt) | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8 | part 9 | part 10 | part 11 | part 12
“I’m so sorry,” Beca says quickly, rushing up to where Chloe’s sitting patiently at their reserved table.
“It’s okay,” Chloe says, standing. She pulls Beca for in for a thorough kiss, one usually reserved for the privacy of their home. “You’re here now,” she murmurs, kissing Beca once again for good measure.
“I - I…” Beca blinks, shaking the force of Chloe’s kiss from her mind as best as she can. “I’m sorry I’m late. They were talking about putting me-”
“Bec,” Chloe says gently. “It’s fine. You know I understand.” She reaches for Beca’s hand once Beca sits down, fully. “You’ll never have to explain it to me. I’ve been here for the entire journey, haven’t I?” She pushes a menu towards Beca.
“Don’t you still want to hear about it?” Beca asks, exaggerating a pout for Chloe’s benefit.
“We have all the time in the world, Bec.”
Beca fumbles for her phone which she can hear buzzing on her bedside table. She sighs, rolling over from where she had been cuddling Chloe’s old pillow and slowly falling asleep.
Blearily, she glances at the screen before answering. “Chlo,” she greets, eyes still closed. “It’s kinda late,” she mumbles.
“Will you go out with me? On a date?” Chloe asks, the moment Beca picks up the phone.
Beca blinks, nearly dropping her phone. She’s more awake, suddenly.
“Bec?” Chloe feels shy for the first time in a while. She feels shy because she feels like she’s asking out her high school crush. Or maybe because she’s asking the woman who had been her fiancée out on a date.
“I – I think I’m allowed just, like, one moment to process that,” Beca says, voice coming out on an appealing rasp. She can’t help the disbelieving laugh that escapes her. Chloe grins a little at the sound. “You called me in the middle of the night to tell me that? To ask me out?” Beca can’t resist, because the love that rushes through her at that moment overwhelms her. “You’re so weird,” she murmurs affectionately, lovingly.
Chloe’s laugh is light and Beca can practically hear her smile. “Thanks,” she says, like an echo of an exact moment in Beca’s mind. It is so far removed at this point, but it still sends a pang through her heart.
“I couldn’t sleep,” Chloe admits.
“Are you okay?” Beca asks quickly. “What’s wrong?”
Chloe laughs at that a little bit – mostly because nothing feels wrong for the first time in a while. She feels like she can breathe again and she feels like all she needs is to have Beca by her side. “Nothing’s wrong, Bec,” she says softly. “I promise.”
Beca swallows. “Chlo,” she murmurs.
Chloe hums in response.
“Ask me again,” she implores quietly.
The slow exhale she hears over the line only makes her grip her phone tighter.
“Beca Mitchell,” Chloe begins. “Will you go out with me on a date? An honest-to-God date?”
“I…yeah, of course I’ll go out with you,” Beca says, as if she’d decline that invitation. She yawns. “I mean, you kissed me, so. It makes sense.”
It’s so wonderfully awkward and so Beca that Chloe doesn’t even bother feigning surprise at the shock of affection that runs through her. She just lets it kind of envelop her and warm her.
”So, uh,” Chloe says lightly. “How’ve you been?”
“I’ve been good,” Beca says as if they didn’t just see each other a couple days ago. “Still working on music. It’s been a lot of studio work, but I’ll get there…” She trails off, pondering. Chloe lets her, enjoying the silence for once. “How about you? Heard you went to Atlanta recently.” It’s meant to be lighthearted, but Chloe’s little sigh tells her that this late night phone call serves a dual purpose.
“I’ve been remembering things,” Chloe tells her with some reservation in her voice. She’s all for the memories, but not if they’re going to get Beca’s hopes up all the way. “I - I wanted to tell you earlier, but we kind of...got carried away,” she says, referring to how they ended up retiring to Beca’s father’s house and making out for a few minutes before slowing to gently trading kisses in the guest room until they dozed off.
The next day, it went largely as an unspoken agreement to not talk about it until they returned to Los Angeles.
“What kind of things?” Beca asks quietly, picking up on the quietly serious tone to Chloe’s voice. She’ll return to the topic of kissing Chloe later. “Like...everything?”
“No, not everything,” Chloe says, hoping that Beca isn’t too disappointed. “I…I think they’re memories, but they mostly feel like emotions, if anything. I remembered, mostly randomly, how you helped me with a papercut once.”
Beca laughs, a little shakily at that. It’s so small, but so monumentally amazing to her that Chloe remembers things at all. It’s more than she could have asked for. “Once?” she asks. “Try like ten thousand times. You’re the clumsiest person I know.”
“That can’t be true,” Chloe protests, voice bordering on a whine. “Aubrey told me you once walked into a trap. A literal trap.”
“Well, I mean...there wasn’t a sign. That I saw.” Beca huffs and it’s adorable. Chloe grins again.
They fall into a comfortable silence once more. Chloe tries not to think about whether Beca’s lying sprawled in her bed, or more specifically, whether she’s wearing those attractive pajama shorts.
She shakes her head, clearing her head. “Beca,” she begins. “I’ve missed you,” she says, because it’s true and she wants Beca to know that.
“I just saw you,” Beca points out, though she keeps her voice playful. She feels like she could talk to Chloe forever, if she wanted.
“You know what I mean.” Chloe sighs. “It’s weird, because you’re here , but I just...miss you.”
“I’m right here.”
“I know.”
Beca’s breathing is slow and steady, almost like she’s falling back asleep. “I’ve missed you ,” Beca replies. “More than songs can express, probably. Like, you’d think that as a musician, I’d have a better way of saying that.”
Chloe doesn’t say anything to that, simply smiling over the line.
“Sorry, that was kinda cheesy,” Beca finally says after a pause.
“Yeah, it was,” Chloe agrees, even though Beca hadn’t asked. “I liked it.”
I like you .
“I like you,” Beca says, so quiet that Chloe almost misses it.
Figures Beca would beat her to the punch.
Chloe can’t help the giddy feeling that rises up in her. “Tell me again,” she says.
Beca laughs, sounding a bit sleepier than before. “I like you, Chloe Beale.”
Chloe smiles, feeling herself sinking into her own dreamworld.
Before she falls, she ensures she lets out a sleepy, “I like you, too.”
Chloe picks up a copy of InStyle sitting on the glass table in front of her. Around her, people bustle past her, going about their regular business.
EXCLUSIVE: Backstage photos from the 2019 Grammy Awards inside! Pages 14 and 15!
She flips it open, finding the spread inside. She’s pleasantly surprised to see Beca’s face splashed across the inside, though less pleased at the sight of Beca leaning against her non -date that evening.
It makes Chloe’s head hurt.
Despite their newfound closeness, Chloe finds herself missing Beca more than normal, though it likely has to do with the fact that Beca seems to be gearing up for some kind of tour, performing her own music as an opening act for one of the label’s artists.
She has listened to Beca’s music - her own original work as well as the music she has worked on for other artists - and she can say, completely unbiased, that Beca is quite possibly the most talented person she knows.
Unfortunately, other people know that fact too, something Chloe realizes will only continue to be flaunted in front of her.
She lingers in the lobby, staring at glass ceilings and tall windows. She feels exposed and bare, like every eye is on her - like people recognize her, but she doesn’t recognize them in return. Added on top of everything, her headache is being fairly persistent today, so she had been looking forward to a nice lunch with her - her Beca.
“Hey!” Beca’s voice calls from the elevators. Chloe turns at the sound and smiles at the sight of Beca power-walking towards her.
“Hi,” she says, reaching for Beca just as Beca opens her arms for a hug. Chloe tries to stifle the little sound she makes when she sinks into Beca’s arms, contentedly closing her eyes.
“Ready for lunch?” Beca asks, adjusting her jacket.
“Sure, I thought we could-” She is cut off by a young, haggard-looking man rushing up to Beca with a clipboard and manila folder in hand. He breathes heavily, halting right in front of them.
“Beca, we need you to just finish signing these contracts. Also, you have a meeting with the marketing department in like...forty minutes.” He glances at Chloe apologetically. “Oh, hi Chloe.”
Chloe blinks, unsure. “I’m - I’m sorry, I don’t think we’ve met,” she says slowly, trying to place him in her mind.
“Oh, my name is Frankie, but we’ve only met once,” he says quickly when he catches Beca’s expression. “I’ll wait for you back upstairs,” he mutters, directed at Beca.
Chloe waits until he leaves.
“You didn’t tell them,” she says quietly.
Beca sighs. “It’s not really anybody’s business but ours. Only some people know about the accident at all. I’m mostly lucky that I don’t have people breathing down my back every day and night.” She bites her lip. “Please don’t get mad, but I think there’s something I have to do and it can’t wait. I’ll come pick you up tonight?”
Chloe nods, a little hesitantly, but she gets it. This is all part of Beca’s life and now Chloe gets to be a part of it too.
Chloe lets Beca peck her on the cheek before she disappears.
She just wishes she could remember being a part of Beca’s life - seeing all the growth and progress - the first time around.
She heads back to work, pondering.
They get to their little impromptu date later that evening and Chloe bites back a question she has been dying to ask for a while now.
It’s just something Chloe’s curious about.
So, she holds off until they’re strolling along the boardwalk and her hand is brushing Beca’s, fingers just itching to meet their other halves. She buys them both ice cream cones and carries it back to where Beca is leaning against the railing casually.
She decides to just ask because she’s not sure exactly what the protocol is for something like this – dating your (ex?) fiancée again, like it’s the first time.
They’re leaning against a railing at Santa Monica Pier, watching the flocks of both tourists and seagulls milling about.
Chloe demolished her ice cream cone long ago, so she’s enjoying the meticulous way Beca is consuming hers. It does something to Chloe’s chest, watching Beca do innocuous things here and there, like she’s relearning this woman in front of her. She supposes she is, in some way, but everything slots together in her mind so neatly and wonderfully that she can do nothing but greedily consume every moment she has with Beca.
It’s different, now that she has allowed herself to feel again, unapologetically and unabashedly.
“What?” Beca asks, when she catches Chloe’s gaze. Chloe merely smiles at her and thumbs away the fleck of ice cream from Beca’s chin. “Thanks,” she mutters, a little embarrassed. It’s both an old and new sensation, Beca thinks, walking alongside Chloe. She still marvels at how beautiful and wonderful Chloe is, but the fact that she gets to do this at all...
“I...you’ll forgive me if this isn’t first date protocol,” Chloe begins. “But I…wondered if I could ask you something.”
“Okay,” Beca says, turning her body to face her more fully. She reaches for Chloe’s hand, gently tugging her to stand a bit closer.
"Did you meet anyone?" Chloe asks, after a moment. The moment the question leaves her, she feels, amidst curiosity, a vulnerability that strikes her as both old and new.
Beca blinks, confused. “What do you mean? When?”
"When we were…when I was in Portland and you were here. Was there someone for you?"
Beca stares at Chloe, wishing she could figure out exactly what is going through her mind. "No," she says finally and with nothing but honesty. Her brow furrows a little, wondering if they’re going to rehash this, but she supposes Chloe’s curiosity has more to do with the status of their relationship than anything. "I...haven’t been with anybody since you," Beca mumbles, turning to stare at the ocean again. It’s not embarrassing, but she feels a little shy under Chloe’s piercing gaze.
Chloe’s silence makes her glance up. She catches sight of Chloe’s smile – it’s gentle and tinged with affection. “I don’t mean sex, Beca,” she murmurs, ignoring the blush that rises up on her cheeks. “I meant…did you meet anybody who…who you thought, maybe-?”
Beca makes a small grunting sound, somewhere between a huff and a sigh. She ignores the ice cream that’s now dripping down her hand in favour of tilting her head to stare at Chloe almost incredulously. “Chlo,” she says, with finality that she hopes is more assertive than her definitive “no” earlier.
“Bec,” Chloe echoes.
They stare at each other for a moment.
Chloe finally shakes her head and pulls a little at Beca’s hand before sliding a hand to gently grip her waist. “I’d want you to tell me,” she says quietly. “I’d want you to be honest with me. It’s just…I’ve thought about it a lot and how different our lives would be.”
“Chloe,” Beca begins, swallowing thickly at their proximity. She’s still reconciling how close they can be with each other now, wondering where her own boundaries are and how much she can do, even if all she wants to do is kiss Chloe again like they did that night in Barden.
Chloe powers onwards. “There…isn’t any reason why you wouldn’t have met somebody, even in that tiny period of time we were apart.” She ignores the lump in her throat because she knows how true these sentiments are. “I’d want you to be happy and I know I’d understand.”
Beca’s eyes flash with something. Not anger exactly, but something closer to sadness. "There wasn’t anybody, I promise. And…I think you know why there wouldn’t have been anybody." She sighs, looking down at her cone, ensuring she’s holding it away from their bodies so it doesn’t drip onto their clothes. “Do you...want me to make somebody up?”
Chloe plucks the ice cream cone from Beca’s hand and bites into the waffle. “No,” she laughs. “You know what I want, I think.”
"Chloe,” Beca says, watching as Chloe finishes off her ice cream cone. “Chlo, I work in the entertainment industry.”
“I am aware,” Chloe mutters, thinking of all the gorgeous men and women who hang off her all the time.
Beca’s eyes light up at the mild possession in Chloe’s tone. “But, I mean, I meet a lot of seriously cool people every day. They’re talented, they’re attractive, sure, but I have never thought about any of them in any way other than a completely professional sense.”
"Why not?" Chloe asks. “You thought I had found somebody in Portland, even after a shorter period of time.”
Beca frowns at the memory, guilt and residual pain racking through her. She sees similar pain in Chloe’s eyes. They hadn't talked about Chloe. Beca hadn't thought to ask her the same question and she wished now that she'd done it a lot sooner, like when Chloe first moved back. "Wasn’t there someone for you? Whatever his name was," Beca mutters.
(She remembers.)
"You mean while I was trying to figure out who I was? Who I am?" Chloe asks, laughing a little. She’s glad they can talk about this with levity as opposed to pain.
"It's not totally impossible, okay," Beca murmurs.
"Honestly, it was a little impossible," Chloe said. "I went for me , not find somebody new above all. Believe me when I say Matt was an anomaly."
“Matt now, huh?” Beca asks, though it lacks bite. She’s just enjoying the way the ocean breeze kind of ruffles Chloe’s hair a little and how they’re standing close enough that she can smell Chloe’s shampoo.
Chloe rolls her eyes.
"But,” Beca says. “The fact remains, you met somebody you liked. Even if it was just in a friendly way. You met somebody that had no expectations of you and was a blank slate if you wanted.”
"A friend, yeah. Not anybody I could see myself being with."
Beca purses her lips, nodding sagely. "That’s…disappointing or something, I guess."
Chloe scoffs. “Yeah, you look really disappointed, Bec.”
"Oh, I am."
"I wasn't looking," she says, finally, with honesty that shines through her eyes. Beca sees it and nearly sags in relief.
“I wasn’t looking either,” Beca replies. “I…found everything I need.”
There’s some hesitance to Beca’s words like she’s not sure Chloe is ready to hear these things – whether Chloe is fully comfortable with them, even though they’re on a date. It fuels Chloe’s attraction to her.
“Honestly,” Beca continues, in Chloe’s silence. “That distance was for the best, you know? It was nice to have time to ourselves, wasn’t it?”
Chloe feels something loosen inside her chest. Like she can breathe again. "Yeah.”
“But…now,” Beca murmurs, cupping Chloe’s cheek. It’s warmed from the sun. She gently rubs her thumb over soft skin before leaning up to kiss her.
It’s soft and sweet - an even gentler kiss than their shared kiss in the Barden courtyard. Beca sinks into it, closing her eyes, wondering if she’ll ever get over the sensation of kissing Chloe, especially now that she cherishes each moment (more than before) like it’s the first day of the rest of their lives over and over again.
“I hope that was okay,” she mumbles, pulling back.
Chloe shakes her head before pulling Beca into a tight hug. Around them, sound fades to a distant buzz. All Chloe can feel is the gentle press of Beca’s body against hers, as perfect as ever. "Beca,” she whispers. “You know I still have a long way to go, don't you?"
Beca lets out a shaky sigh, feeling simultaneously ecstatic and hesitant. “I know,” she whispers. “I promise to be here for you.”
“I know you will be,” Chloe says.
Believing Beca is as natural as breathing.
tbc // my fics tag
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