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shotorokiworld · 5 years ago

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emotive .1

pairing: daisuke kanbe x fem!reader

warnings: not really any yet....

summary: the story of how and why daisuke kanbe fell in love with you. proving once again, that opposites attract

a/n: this is my first time posting my writing anywhere so I may or may not have panicked a little. there are probably some mistakes i didn’t fix, as i was rereading i kept overthinking things so i just said screw it (like how daisuke kinda comes off a little creepy but idk i swear i already have part 2 written and it gets better). oh and one other thing! i have never read the manga and i based his personality solely off of the first episode of the show, which might’ve been a bad move but we’ll see. please enjoy!

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Daisuke Kanbe is known as a cold, collected(despite his reckless tendencies), intimidating man, which he is. What very little emotion he shows comes in the form of a cocky smirk or a challenging raise of his eyebrows, if even that. He likes it that way and he enjoys the fact that people perceive him this way.

People can’t stand not being able to read other’s faces or get a rise out of them. This just gives him yet another advantage while he’s working on cases in the field. Suspects and witnesses alike tend to crumble under his gaze, they can’t figure out what he’s thinking, they can’t call his bluff, and before you know it, words are spilling out of them.

It’s not like he doesn’t have any emotions, it’s just been so long since he’s experienced most of them. The adrenaline rush he gets from acting so reckless on the job is the closest thing to excitement or fear he’s felt in years. If it weren’t for those moments, life would be such a boring existence for a man like Daisuke.

All of this makes it a bit easier to understand why he fell in love with you. You were so different from him, you were warm, inviting, and all kinds of people were drawn to you. Normally, Daisuke couldn’t stand people like that, they gave him migraines. However, there was one thing that set you apart from the majority. The way you felt everything so intensely. You never tried to hide the way you were feeling, even if you could. Your face was easy to read, you didn’t hide behind a facade, anyone would describe you as an open book.

This is what made him gravitate towards you in the first place. He had never met anyone so open and unashamed of bearing their soul to the world. It almost made his head spin trying to understand how your mind worked.

At first he would just watch you more intently in the office, where you worked as a secretary. Then he would find himself thinking about you while he’s out in the field; his eyebrows would pull together ever-so-slightly in annoyance. He doesn’t want to think about the obnoxiously kind, headache-inducing enigma that is you. Though just two weeks later that’s all he seems to be able to think about, and he’s given up trying not to. His mind was filled with questions that needed answers.

There is only so much observing someone from afar can tell you about them. Having only spoken 15 words to you, at most, in the few weeks you had been working in the office, didn’t help much either. If he was gonna figure you out, he was gonna have to put in some effort. You’re so open with the people around you, so one conversation should be enough to satiate his curiosity, right? Wrong. It only made things worse for him.

It had been a quiet day, a few members of the staff had been let go early but you were still there and Daisuke sat lounging at his desk. He knew this would be the perfect time to strike. Not only was the office dead, but if you questioned his sudden curiosity in you, he could play if off as boredom. Just as he had made the decision, you were walking by his desk, lunch box in hand. Without hesitation, his arm juts out in front of you, blocking your path, and stopping you in your tracks. Your eyes widen a bit in surprise before you turn to him with your typical kind expression, tilting your head to the side in question.

“Daisuke? Everything alright?,” you asked in a sweet, curious tone.

When his gaze finally rose to meet yours, he had the same bored look on his face that he normally does, which took you some time to get used to. The first few days of working in the office you had assumed he didn’t like you, or that you had done something to upset him already. Those assumptions died when you realized that everyone in the office got the same treatment, but that didn’t stop Daisuke from noticing your face drop or the way you wouldn’t look him in the eye while talking to him during that time.

Things were different now though, you held eye contact and didn’t uncomfortably fidget while waiting for his response. He waited a few moments to answer, taking in your demeanor.

“Sit with me?” It was a question, technically, but it didn’t sound like one coming from him. He knew you wouldn’t say no, you were too amicable to do that.

He was right. You moved to sit in the seat only a few feet away, although not before pausing to give him a confused look then ultimately shrugging it off and joining him. You placed your lunch down on the desk in front of you and saw from the corner of your eye that he was just watching you as you unpacked your meal, not moving to do the same. You looked relaxed as you moved, but he could tell by the way you chewed at the inside of your cheek, and the way that your eyes darted around the desktop, that you were nervous.

So he’ll start by simply breaking the ice, casually asking “how are you liking your job so far?” You’d be a bit surprised that he asked, considering he doesn’t seem like the type of man to enjoy small talk, but you perk up anyway.

“I’m really enjoying it actually,” you tell him with a bright smile, “everyone is so nice, and it keeps me on my toes, so I’m never really bored.”

“You fit in well. Where did you work before you came here?” His eyes never leave your face, he doesn’t want to miss a single movement.

“I was a university hired tutor, my school offered me a position as a composition tutor so I could have a steady income while looking for a job I really wanted,” you explained, no hesitation in your response.

“And you wanted to be a secretary for a bunch of second rate detectives?” He tilted his head every so slightly, to watch and see if he had pressed any of your buttons.

Which he had, your eyebrows drew closer together and you shook your head, “well first, I don’t consider any of you to be second rate, and second no being a secretary isn’t my end goal, I’m not exactly sure what the right job for me is just yet,” you turned to him and shrugged, “I just know I want to be part of the team that keeps the people in this city safe.” Then you gave him a big smile and stuffed a bite of food into your mouth.

Daisuke wanted to know the reason behind that decision but he decided to dive into that rabbit hole at a later date. So he kept asking you things, nothing too personal at first, he was letting you get comfortable answering his questions without overthinking or hesitating. He had figured out pretty early on that you were a bit oblivious to certain things. Here you sat, happily talking Daisuke’s ear off while you enjoyed your lunch. Not once did you find it even a bit odd that he was asking you so many questions, but not once giving you the chance to ask your own or say anything about himself. Why was that so interesting and frustrating at the same time?

As time went on Daisuke started trying to dig a little deeper, asking you things a little more personal than your average lunch break would involve. This went unnoticed by you, but he had barely begun to scrape the surface when the phone on your desk rang across the room.

That was the end of his interrogation, work began to pick up, and Daisuke found himself feeling disappointed. He didn’t want to stop talking to you, even though it was more like listening to you speak while he hung onto every word.

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#daisuke kanbe #daisuke x reader #daisuke kambe #daisuke kanbe x reader #daisuke kambe x reader #balance unlimited #daisuke fic #daisuke imagine #daisuke x f!reader #daisuke fluff #bnha x reader

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tomurasprincess · 4 years ago

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Good lord everyone is thirsty for DoL again.

Hmm, are you playing on mobile or desktop? Or with the downloaded version? I’ve been playing on desktop with the regular version, and here is how the save screen looks

You should just be able to hit the save button and it’ll save your file.

The hand stabby bit had me doing this too 👀 Whatever it says about you, it says it about me too dlksjfasdfdsf

Every day I learn more about Robin and realize that I need to play his fucking route, finally. He has a lemonade stand? Why is that so damned adorable to me? And I’ll have to remember that, my promiscuity needs majorly raised so I can get some more events.

My MC is a massive asshhole too because she never does anything to help the poor orphans. I haven’t even gotten to the point where you can offer to pay for poor Robin’s debt. He keeps getting taken away, poor Robin. I am sorry I don’t have the money yet to pay for you.

SOUP KITCHEN? Holy fuck I keep learning more and more about this game, I didn’t even know that was an option. More proof that my MC is pure evil.

She let one of the centaurs fuck you? That kinda sounds amazing, to be perfectly honest. I’ve never been recaptured before and now I might just need to. Although it sounds like it’ll be even harder to get away the second time around. And OMG, missing Halloween is the worst. Those were all such fun events from what I played, although I only did Whitney and Kylar.

I’ve left the tower once but I didn’t go far at all, and you have the option to wait for him to pick you back up. You’re right though, I’d be afraid of Remy’s farm as well. Stockholm syndrome has definitely kicked in because I’m thinking “he’d be so sad if you didn’t come back to the nest, I can’t risk that.” 😂

Oh god yeah I’ve done that before, and the Olde English that the book was written in had me cracking up. I felt bad for my poor MC feeling jealous afterwards though.

LMAO, RIP your free time. I would say that I’m sorry, but I’m really not

😂

Someone else was having a problem with that too! I don’t play on mobile so I can’t really say too much about it, I don’t have an issue on desktop.

It really does start out hard! Once I raised my hands skill and started working at the massage parlor, things got easier, but before that happened it was really difficult to make enough money. And that’s even without trying to help Robin pay the rent as well.

I just chose the “move quickly deeper into the moors option” with the regular move option thrown in occasionally. I eventually got the notice that I was being hunted, and he ended up just swooping down to snatch me up and take me into his tower.

AHHH, hi and welcome back! I know the pain of life fucking you in the ass, I can fully relate and hope you’re doing better now. I forgot that I had vore turned on and got eaten by some sort of snake as well, and I was briefly horrified. Have fun with the trick or treating event, it’s a lot of fun! I chose the witch costume and looked adorable.

Ahh, I’m sorry but I don’t think it is! Or at least I don’t know of a way to do it. That’s not weird at all, I like both as well but I generally play with all men too.

So do I! I miss Whitney all the time when school isn’t in session, and it sucks that you can find Kylar outside of school but seemingly can’t find Whitney. Maybe do that and he’ll get jealous and show up, lmao dslf;jsdafsdf

You are so valid, anon. I pretty much do the same.

Haha, no problem at all! I do believe there’s something you can buy at the Forest Hut that lets you keep your transformations for good, at least I know there’s one with cow and I believe cat transformation. You should go there and see if you can find something! The MC losing their clothes all the time is the bane of my existence though, I hate having to buy new clothes all the time. Honestly though, living in the woods as a wolf girl doesn’t sound too bad.

I have no idea how I’ve managed to avoid it, but it hasn’t happened yet. I’ve gotten the body writing and such, and a few tattoos at Remy’s farm, but nothing from Whitney. He clearly needs to love me enough to give me tattoos, damnit.

Hi there, glad to have you! You’re right, it’s a ton of fun and I’m glad so many people are enjoying it. Check the first ask of this post and I included a screenshot of the save system. Hopefully it helps.

You might need to redownload the version here, if you downloaded the game to begin with. If you’re using the online web browser link, it updates automatically.

The eternal mystery. Everyone else progresses pretty quickly (except Avery in my game, for some reason) but Whitney tends to be slower for me. PLEASE JUST LOVE ME, WHITNEY.

Hahah, I love that little scenario. Isn’t that the one you can also push him down on the bed and flirt with him? Because I’m not a dominant type but that was still so much fun to do.

I love my Stabby Boyfriend, you cannot change my mind. He really is adorable and he tries so hard for poor MC. Even protects her with pepper spray refills, which is truly a gentleman stalker type of thing. He’s even attacked someone attacking me before.

OMG WHY DID I NOT THINK OF ENJI? THAT COMPARISON IS PERFECT.

#🔪 anon #video games #degrees of lewdity #so many dol asks #everyone is thirsty for the game again #this is what i get for raving about the great hawk #i've brought you all down with me

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project-pnf-404 · 4 years ago

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Checkpoint and important updates 2!!: Electric boogaloo!!

Heyo guys!! Long time no talk. So, I’ve got some cool update stuff to show you guys. I’ve been doing a lot of blog “housekeeping” since the end of the last event. (don’t worry it hopefully won’t be boring update stuff lmao as it includes some new supplementary content). So, first and foremost, thanks to the inspiration from @koppais-smallest-nerd I’d like to let you guys know that I am now adding screen reader access to all future posts!!! This one included. At the bottom of each post under the, “read more”, image descriptions for all images will be added! Screen reader accessibility will also be added to all previous asks on the blog. However, getting through all of them will take a tiny bit. As, of this update, the first 4 asks have had image descriptions added. As well as all the supplementary content in between where applicable.

I’d also like to show you guys some supplementary content for the blog. Between these dashed lines are in character day 1 log entries written by the rest of the crew.

———————————————

I originally wasn’t sure if I wanted to put these extra day 1 logs on the main blog or not. But, I’ve decided that all supplementary content that may be story related will remain on the main blog for the foreseeable future, while BTS content will end up on PNF-404-Plus.

That being said since the end of the 1st event and my time away from the blog a lot has been going on when it comes to the blog.

For one the entire desktop version of the blog has had a large overhaul. A new theme has been added to the main page.

But, not only that but new side pages with supplementary content have been added!! This includes an event list, a bio page for the crew members of the S.S Drake, a Piklopedia page for the new Piklopedia, and a music page to top it all off!!

The Event List will show each new event as they are added! You can click on the current known events to go directly to all posts tagged with that event tag. Speaking of which all Event 01 posts have now had their tags updated with the Event 01 tag making it much easier to navigate.

The new Crew Members page has bios for all the members currently on the mission or known in the story so far! These Bios are pretty in line with cannon with some fanon, and light headcanon added in for good measure. I recommend taking a look as it does have some interesting info in there. Also quick note: all of these bios are written as if it is prior to the beginning of the blog.

Then there’s the Piklopedia!! Here you can read each of their findings as they explore PNF-404! Currently the findings will be on each area they explore (not each creature they find) as they haven’t found any new creatures yet. There is also a map of places they’ve discovered and more!

Lastly, a new music page has been added. On this page, I’ve created event-inspired music playlists. Some of the songs have been mentioned in the past. But, here you can listen to them all in one place and see which songs are for which part of the events. As well there’s a secret songs playlist. This playlist has nothing to do with the blog directly but is filled with music given to me by people I’ve met from this community while I’ve been here!! Currently, there are 5 songs there, however, there will be more added in the future! What makes it secret is that you won’t know who gave me the song XD. (well unless you’re the one who gave me the song lmao) who knows if you’ve ever shared music with me before you may find your song there!! (There is also one song I’m sharing with you guys in there too so have fun figuring that out lmao. )

As well the table of contents has been once again updated with a lot of this new stuff as well as some other new information!! As for mobile users as of now, all of this is on separate Tumblr pages. However, in the near future, I will be uploading much of this stuff , such as the Piklopedia entries and Crew Bio’s, as individual posts! However, in the meantime, if you feel like you can always check out these pages on your phone browser instead if you’re a mobile-exclusive user. (Though some pages don’t look as good on phone)

Welp, I think that’s it as far as updates go!! I should be back with brand new ask posts soon (likely within the next week or so!) so keep a look out!! I’ll see ya guys again soon and thanks for reading!!!

In the first image, Alph’s Day 1 Log entry is shown. His log says, “To think I thought the first day would go well. Then again I didn’t think I would get sucked out of the ship either so maybe I should stop being so surprised. At the very least Louie and I were able to find our way back despite some obstacles and I was able to fix the ship in time. Though if it weren’t for Chunks we would have never found the pikmin we did. That little guy sure saved the day.

However, Then there's what happened to Brittany… To see her in a situation like that... I can’t even bear to think about it. Tomorrow I will be checking over the entirety of the Drake to make sure a crash like that doesn't happen again. I can't help but think that the crash was due to me overlooking something during maintenance... However, The only thing I can do now is to make sure something like this never happens again for all our sake, especially Brittanys’. “ It is then sighed by Alph

In the second Image Charlies Day 1 Log entry can be read it says, “I should have been on top of things. As this crew’s captain, everything that went wrong was under my watch and things should have gone much smoother. That being said I am very glad that all of my crew have made it out alive. Though I am still worried about Brittany. If only I was able to keep her safe…

But, at this point, we all must press forward. We have a task to complete and after seeing how devastated some areas are, we must get to the bottom of what’s wrong with PNF-404. Nothing will get in my way, not with my steely fists that is!!” It is then signed by Charlie

In the third image Louies’ day 1 log entry can be seen it says,

“

Going back to the pikmin planet wasn’t at the top of my list of things I thought I’d be doing anytime soon. Yet somehow I find myself back here and stranded again…. At least I wasn’t fully alone this time…

Alph and I eventually found a pikmin that we later named Chunks. He sure acts differently in comparison to any other Pikmin I’ve seen before. But, even still, if it weren’t for Chunks, we wouldn’t have been able to help Brittany or find any other pikmin for that matter. So, we should thank him for that.” It is then signed by Louie

In the fourth image the updated version of the Project: PNF-404 Tumblr is shown. It now has a bright cyan futuristic aesthetic to it. In the fifth image a picture of the new events page, listing all the past and future events planned so far is shown. It has 1 known event Titled Event 01. The other 3 are titled Event unknown. In the sixth image, the new crew members’ character page is shown. A picture of Olimar is shown along with a description of his traits and a biography. It reads as follows,

CAPTAIN OLIMAR

AGE 38

ALIAS(ES)Olimar

SPECIES Hocotatian

GENDER Male

TITLE(S) Employee of Hocotate Freight, Xenobiologist

AFFILIATION Hocotate Freight, Planet Hocotate Government

Fatherly, well-meaning, and resourceful, for an almost 40 year old Hocotatian he has a lot of bravery and guts. Olimar first and foremost loves his family and cares deeply for others around him. A Hardworking employee of Hocotate Freight and family man, Olimar tends to try and stay level-headed while looking out for others.

Having been one of the first to visit the Pikmin planet Olimar has extensive knowledge of the planet's life. Lucky for him he just so happens to have gone to college for xenobiology. Many of his findings can be found within his many log entries known as the Piklopedia.

But, for as much as Olimar tends to be on top of things, his trips to the pikmin planet have had him face many dangers and life-threatening events. Though these issues are not something he brings up…

In the seventh image, The new Piklopidea page is shown, In one section it displays a map of PNF-404 with 2 marked locations. The first of which is highlighted in blue is named the “Silent Stream” the second, is highlighted in orange, Its title is “Glacial Gardens”. To the right of that is a description introduction for the Piklopedia. It says” To help ensure the progress and success of this mission all crew members must write down their findings in this log. Overview:

CAPTAIN Olimar: Writes In-depth biological analysis of fauna and how the ecosystem affects said fauna.

LOUIE: Writes about Recipes and ingredients that can be found in each area. ALPH: Looks at the area with the eyes of an engineer. He uses this insight to discuss the benefits and flaws of what he’s analyzing. BRITTANY: Uses her botanist skills to look into the flora of the area along with talking about the aesthetics of things and adding in her own general opinions.

CAPTAIN CHARLIE: Writes about combat strategy and how one can use the environment in an area for a tactical advantage.

To the left is a map showing the current locations discovered by the crew. The one highlighted in orange has yet to be explored.

The final image shows the new music page! 6 playlists can be selected on the left each having 5 songs. To the right is an image of the event 01 cover art. With (from left to right), Brittnay, Charlie, Olimar, Louie, and Alph all looking up with a distressed expression on their faces.

END ID

#pikmin #supplementary content #alph #louie #charlie #ooc #Event 01 #not an ask #update #man why are my posts always so long XD #I’m writing most of this in the middle of the night I’m really tired #tomorrow imma look at this and be like what the heck did I write lmao

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xxwritemeastoryxx · 5 years ago

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These Violent Delights Ch. 1

Close to Home

Author: xxwritemeastoryxx

Pairings: Elijah Mikaelson x OC

Word Count: 2.9K

Warnings: Horrible crime references. I seriously need to look into this more before next week’s post. But not much is going on in this one.

Author’s Note: WELCOME TO THE FIRST CHAPTER OF THESE VIOLENT DELIGHTS! I do hope you guys enjoy this one and I am definitely looking forward to writing this out for you guys!♥

Feedback gives me life and motivation for future things. ♥

<<Masterlist || Chapter 2 >>

Sirens filled the air as several cop cars surrounded the outside of the Vega household. What was once a quiet night at home had been ruined the moment the sirens blared, leaving the members of the house knowing there was nowhere to go. That their night would be anything but peaceful

The younger Vega children that were at home didn’t understand what was going on. They didn’t understand what it was that any of them had done to cause the police to enter their home. Worry filled Adriana’s face as she helped her mother hold on to her younger siblings as several officers led them outside. She and her mother understood what was going on. Her father’s life work had finally caught up with him and they were finally there for him.

Victor Vega had his hands deep in the black market. Whatever anyone needed, Victor could easily procure it in a timely manner. For the right price of course. His morals were out the window when it came to his business. There was never a shortage of business and his family had been able to live comfortably. At least that was until he messed up, catching the attention of Mikael Mikaelson.

While Mikael once followed the rules, he now used what he could to his advantage. His pockets bought the information he needed and it led him straight for Victor. If he could arrest someone such him, Mikael could make a name for himself on the force and he could move up the ladder as he wanted.

At least that had been the plan. Until the search through the house came up empty. Victor had been sane enough to ensure he never brought his work home with him. While those traces had led them to Victor, the proof of possession was lacking.

“Just tell me what you know,” Mikael said as he looked at Adriana. He had pulled her over to the side, wanting to speak with her privately. “Your father must have told you something.”

“I know nothing.” Adriana said as she crossed her arms. While there were many reasons why she had despised the Mikaelson in front of her, she hated him even more for coming to her home and disrupting her younger sibling’s sleep. “He has never pulled me into this. You would know that if you actually listened to what your son has told you.”

“My son has been wrapped into your lies for long enough that I no longer accept what he has told me.” Mikael’s eyes narrowed at her. “What he sees in you, I’ll never understand. Maybe after tonight, Elijah will actually see how much you try to protect your vile family.”

“Mikaelson!” A new voice filled the air. Another officer came up to them, someone that Adriana had never met before. “That’s enough. She’s a kid.”

Mikael took one last look at Adriana before walking away from her. This wouldn’t be the last time he had that conversation with her. His gut was telling him that even a child such as her would eventually find herself in plenty of situations similar to her father.

Fifteen Years Later

The sound of metal snapping had been music to Adriana’s ears. Cutting the lock to the roof access was one of the easier tasks of the night. A small smirk pulled at her lips as tossed the bolt cutters into her bag before picking up her rifle case and headed up the last few steps to her destination.

As the cold night air reached her face, she took in a deep breath. Tonight was going to be easy money. As she walked over to the ledge of the building, her brown eyes scanned the building right across from her. The view of the high-end hotel in front of her gave her the perfect view she needed.

Once she had the right room she needed in view, she began unloading the sniper rifle she carried with her. While she would never admit it out loud, this was one of her favorite parts of the job. To have the power to take someone’s life way without them ever knowing that they were the target.

From years of practice, she had the rifle set up and in position in a matter of moments. Just as she moved into position, her target walked in through the door with his mistress. “Right on schedule.” She mumbled to herself. All she had to do was wait for the right moment.

A second later, her phone began ringing. Her eye never left her target as she brought her hand up to her headset. Tapping on the button she accepted the call before bringing her hand back into position. At the beginning of the automated message, her eyes rolled. It never failed that she would be getting a call from someone in a detention facility.

It usually meant that her next black card would come from someone that was behind bars. In Adriana’s line of work, a black card held a chip inside of it that gave her all the details she needed of her target. It gave specific routines and details that she would need to complete her task. She just wondered who it would be from this time.

Rosa, it’s Damon.

A huff passed her lips at the quick recording. Damon Salvatore was an old friend of hers as well as a regular client of hers. The Salvatores had given Adriana a pretty nest egg over the last few years. She could comfortably retire and live her life off on some island if she wanted. But she was still young, and she enjoyed what she did a lot more than the idea of retirement.

“How is it behind bars, Salvatore?” She asked the moment the call connected.

Damon’s laugh on the other end had brought a small smirk to her lips. He hadn’t changed one bit. “I bet you say that to all your inmate callers.”

“Just you, Damon.” She said as she adjusted slightly. “If I said it to everyone, it wouldn’t make you so special.”

“Careful, Rosa.” Adriana could hear the smirk in his voice. “Wouldn’t want Elena to hear you have a soft spot for me.”

A scoff passed her lips. “I’m in the middle of getting take-out. I’m assuming there was a reason you were calling me?”

A chuckle came over the phone. “What is on the menu tonight?”

“Chinese.” She watched as her target came to settle on the couch in front of the window. The exact place she had noticed from the information on the black card. Where was the challenge of someone going out of their daily routine? All she needed was for the woman that was currently entertaining him to move.

"Sounds delicious." She could hear the teasing in his tone. "Look, I was wondering if you could pick up a kitten and drop it off in New Orleans. Elena is a little lonely, and I thought a companion would help ease that while I'm gone. She’s had her eye on this specific one for a while now."

"Does it need to be a handoff or can I drop and run? I do have a lot of things I need to take care of starting tomorrow." At this point, she knew this was going to be a conversation of interest. The faster she could get off the phone, the better.

"Preferably a handoff." He scoffed. "Can't leave a kitten on a porch until Elena gets off of work."

"Alright. Have Blondie leave word at my office; I'll get the details once I get back." She watched as the companion moved over to the bar and began pouring herself a drink.

"When will you be back?"

"As soon as I finish my order." She mumbled before pressing the trigger. A satisfied smirk pulled at her lips at the chaos that unfolded before her." You know it's rude to be speaking on the phone while getting ready to order.” She said as she pulled herself up from her spot.

“Right.” She could almost see him roll his eyes at her comment. It wouldn’t have been Damon if he hadn’t. “Before I forget, put a red bow on it. Make it cute.”

Adriana laughed. “Anything else I should remember?” She asked as she began putting things away in record time before picking up the shell casing.

“I’m sure she’ll know it's from me, but it wouldn’t hurt to tell her.”

Her eyebrow raised at the words. That was a dangerous game, and Damon knew it. But Damon also knew it was Adriana that could pull it off flawlessly. “Want the works or short and sweet.”

“Will it hurt to do the works?”

A chuckle passed her lips. “A little extra never hurt anyone.” She said as she made her way towards the roof access. She had a usual routine when it came to ‘the works’. “Make sure Blondie gets it to me soon; otherwise, I might not be able to do it.”

“Don’t worry, Rosa. I already called her and details would be waiting for you the moment you get back from lunch.”

Without another word, Damon hung up. Or it was that his time was up. Either way, Adriana knew that with this next job, she’d be going to the one place she hadn’t been to in years.

Home.

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The light green case folder slid across the desk, pulling Elijah Mikaelson’s attention from the desktop for only a second. His eyes moved back to the screen, continuing to fill out the report he had been working on. The sound of a throat clearing was what caused him to finally stop and look away for longer than a second.

He found Marcel Gerard standing there with his arms crossed over his chest. Sighing, Elijah reached over and grabbed a hold of the file.

"What is it now?" He asked as he started to open the file.

"Damon made an interesting call last night." Marcel said as he leaned against the desk.

"And?" Elijah's eyebrow raised, not bothering to look at the case notes just yet.

“The first call he made was to Caroline Forbes.” Marcel said with a slight shrug. “Mostly to check in on his girlfriend, who was working at the time. But he asked her to deliver a package to a friend. There were no details on what the package was. At least there wasn’t until he made the second call to a burner phone.”

Elijah’s eyebrow raised as he took in Marcel’s words. “He’s making deals while behind bars.”

Marcel shook his head. “He’s ordering hits. The transcript is in there. I was told this one holds priority.”

Elijah flipped several pages over until he found the transcripts of the calls. Just as Marcel said, Damon’s call to Caroline had been nothing too out of the ordinary. While the details of the package hadn’t been clarified, he had gotten more details out in the next phone call.

Placing the file down on the desk, Elijah leaned back in his seat. “I would ask how Salvatore had managed to get a mercenary’s number, but this is Damon we are talking about. We’ve been after ‘Rosa’ for years and he’s been one way to get to her all along.”

Several years after Elijah joined New Orleans PD, a mercenary by the name of Rosa had started appearing in multiple intelligence reports. Corrupt politicians around the world were relying on Rosa to get several jobs done. And as the years passed, she became untouchable. No one in the world had managed to get a hold of the woman and take her in.

Anytime someone called her, her voice had been distorted, leaving her voice unrecognizable. No matter what techs had been hired, they couldn’t fix her voice. She left no traces of her time there and there was never any DNA Evidence left behind.

Elijah had been close to finding out who she was when he had first become Detective. He figured out the location of her next target and was ready to take her down. But just as he was about to, he was handed a more important case that focused on the Salvatore Crime Family. His priorities changed and Rosa slipped through the cracks.

Marcel sighed. “Your sister said that would be the only fact you focused on.”

Elijah’s eyebrow raised. “Is there something I’m missing?”

“Rosa is coming to New Orleans to take down a target. The only one who has pissed of the Salvatores recently has been you.” Marcel hoped that his words would register in his mind this time.

Elijah shook his head and chuckled. “You think I’m the target?”

“Rebekah believes so. And if Damon hired Rosa, it’s not going to be something you see coming.” Marcel didn’t like the thought of it, but it was something that needed to be discussed.

Elijah thought for a moment. Rebekah had reason to worry. He had dismantled the Salvatore family in more ways than one. The Salvatore Brothers were both sitting in two different Prisons. The girlfriends were the only ties to the organization. Both of them had currently been under surveillance.

If Rosa was hired to take him out, Marcel was right. He wouldn’t see it coming. That was proven several times over the years. Every one of her targets never saw it coming. Her Mo was different each time, making it harder to decipher if it was her or not. The choice of death was always asked by the person that hired her.

With that thought in mind, he pulled the file back to him. His eyes scanned the transcript. If it was for him, he needed to know what was the choice. As he scanned over the transcript, a small smirk pulled at his lips. “I’ll see it coming.”

“Excuse me?” Marcel asked wanting to be sure he had heard Elijah correctly.

“If I am the intended target, I’ll see it coming.” He held out the file to Marcel. “She asked if it would be a handoff or a drop and run. Salvatore replied with a handoff. It means he wants her close and personal with the intended target.”

“Elijah, this could be anyone.” Marcel hated that at this moment Elijah was being stubborn about this. While he understood that hiding away wasn’t the best option, it was going to make things difficult. “Waiters, bankers, anyone that we may come into contact in our daily lives and you wouldn’t know the difference.”

“She works based off of routine.” Elijah reminded him. “If I stick to the same places and faces, this will work in our favor.”

“You really want to do this?” Marcel asked as he pointed a finger to the file. “He asked her to put in the works as well. That could be anything. If it’s an in-person encounter, she has an unlimited amount of ways she could do this.”

“I’m taking this as a challenge, Marcel. One that I’m surprised you aren’t taking. We’ve been after Rosa for years and now that we have a target close to home, you want to back out.” Elijah understood the risks. His whole job was about risks. But he wasn’t about to lay low out of fear. He’d rather face it head-on.

“Are you crazy?” Rebekah asked as she walked into the office. She had heard the tail end of the conversation. She wasn’t about to have her brother go through with his crazy ideas. “I would expect this from Nik, but not you Elijah.”

An amused looked formed on Elijah’s face at his sister’s words. “I’ve been in worse situations than this one. Say, for instance, actually taking down the Salvatores.”

“Bloody hell,” Rebekah said as she ran her hand down her face. “You had a bulletproof vest on. Are you going to walk around with one on all day until she is caught?”

It was Marcel’s words that shocked them both. “He’s got a point, Bex. This is a case that we haven’t solved in years. She’s still out there because we started working on the Salvatore case. I’ve always been wondering who’s the face we are supposed to put on the wanted poster.”

Rebekah looked between the two men in front of her. She shook her head and threw her hands up. “Fine, but we are making your life a case out of it. You will have your team on standby any time you go out. I want surveillance on Forbes up until the handoff.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Marcel said with a smirk. Rebekah rolled her eyes and walked out of the room at that. “Remind me how she’s your boss when she’s your family?”

Elijah chuckled. “As many times as I’ve mentioned she’s my sister, they never quite believe it. If there is anyone to ask about why, I’d say it has something to do with Mikael.”

Marcel shook his head slightly. “I bet she’s already out there getting people on it.”

“No doubts about that.” Elijah said with a nod. “Why don’t we get Niklaus on surveillance. I’m sure he wouldn’t lose sights of Forbes.”

Marcel threw his head back with a laugh. “100 says he’ll get smacked from attempting to get her number.”

“Lets make it more interesting. 200 that we’ll get a call about it.” Elijah said as he stood from his desk and grabbed his jacket.

There was a lot of work ahead of them. If things were going to work in their favor, there was a lot of prep work that needed to be done. From experience, Elijah knew there was going to be long nights ahead of them. Especially if Rosa was coming into town. And this time, He wasn’t going to be letting her slip through the cracks again.

<<Masterlist || Chapter 2 >>

Always & Forever Tag: @taylordrunkonwhiskey @thewolf-and-thesheep @wayward-dan @neeadinghugs @fafulous @kenmen02 @elizamonet @dora-the-grownup @mschellehitt @xanderling @fandom-princess-forevermore @buckysarm4 @hi-my-name-is-riley @helenasingers @alka16555 @yaniiie

These Violent Delights: @asiaaisa77 @kpopgirlbtssvt @winchestert101 @deni-gonzalez

Stag Tag: @elejah-wonderland @xxsovereignsarayaxx @asiaaisa77 @astudyoftimeywimeystuff

The Originals Tag: @zillahvathek @obsessedwithvampires @alien-sida

Bold Tags mean for one reason or another I cannot tag you. If you would like to be added, or taken off, any of the lists please let me know. ♥

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killjoy-loveit · 5 years ago

Text

Something You’re Not

A/N: Welcome to Spring Season Stories! This is the 18th of the daily stories in April, so be on the lookout for more! If you’re wondering what the posting schedule is, then search ‘Spring season Stories’ on my blog and the calendar should pop up. I would like to clarify that everything written in this story is complete fiction and isn’t to be taken as a true portrayal of reality. As always, the links for my masterlists will be in the notes, though I have come to find (after months of doing this lmao) that on mobile you have to click my reblog of the post to actually get the links- same applies to desktop. I am just going to add that I am planning on a part 2 of this, just so y’all don’t think I’m 110% out to crush your hearts.

Summary: Not everything is what it seems.

Word Count: 2,832

Genre: Spy AU, Angst, a bit of fluff in the middle

Light spilled in from the window behind you, easily illuminating the papers sitting out on your desk. Despite being easy to read, you wanted to slam your head against the desk in frustration. How is it okay to send so much paperwork, to analyze and go over, a mere hour from the meeting? Your boss must be out of his mind to think you’d be able to fully comprehend over a hundred pages filled with legal jargon in that short of a time frame. A scream of annoyance built up in your throat as thoughts plagued you to just toss the documents and finally quit. It sucked to be taken advantage of like this, over and over again.

All because your boss, Mr. Dunne, the eccentric government official he was, knew that you weren’t very good at saying no to more work. This was because you were desperate to prove your value as an employee for your government so that you might be promoted. There was no way in hell you were going to let your political science degree, acquired from one of the most prestigious universities in the nation, go to waste. Putting up with such harsh extremes was your duty as you, unluckily, were hired to assist him with his work, rather than his kinder associate Ms. York.

She was the one you were hoping to work for in all honesty. Ms. York was known for her high morals and consideration of the people, not to mention she was one of the youngest government officials in office and a woman at that. There were times you ran into her in the hallways and she always made sure to greet you politely, asking how you were doing, before moving on her way. Everyone spoke highly of her, even the terrible Mr. Dunne, whose approval was difficult to gain.

“Enough of dwelling on how Mr. Dunne sucks, these papers aren’t going to analyze themselves,” you muttered quietly.

Just like that, your mind focused on the task at hand, letting go of the heavy frustration and annoyance weighing on your mind. Words seemed to bleed together as your eyes flew over each page, taking brief seconds to highlight important parts. Little notes were written in the margins if a section didn’t quite make sense, while small stars indicated something that was written well. By the end of the hour, you had managed to go over approximately ninety percent of the papers placed on your desk. Which was an excellent job, if you must say so yourself.

At that moment a knock sounded on your office door before opening to reveal Mr. Dunne himself. He stepped in with an air of authority that would make anyone else afraid to question him. His demeanor was always something you had admired, despite his terrible personality, he always carried himself well and demanded respect wherever he went.

“Do you have the papers ready?”

A tight smile graced your lips. “I have almost finished all of them. If I could be admitted into the meeting later I can finish the rest and bring them to you then.”

“You couldn’t finish such a small task?” His tone dripped with disapproval.

“Sir, I sincerely apologize. I have only ten more pages left to go over. I can give you what I’ve finished and bring the rest into the meeting later if you allow me to.”

“Fine. Give me the ones that are finished.”

The smile you held firmly on your face was starting to feel painful. “Yes sir, of course. Here they are.” You stated politely, lifting the stack of papers and handing them to him.

Mr. Dunne let out an annoyed huff before turning and excusing himself from your office. Once you were sure he was gone, you dragged your hands down your face in frustration. Letting out a sigh you turned your attention to the remaining ten pages, refocusing in on the work.

Each place you went in the store was crowded with those who were doing their grocery shopping after getting off work. Normally you were aware of this rush and you tended to avoid it by shopping early on the weekends, but you hadn’t been able to make it this past weekend. Now you were stuck having to go during the store’s busiest hours, having to squeeze through the throngs of people just to get a few items. There were only a few things left for you to collect before being able to rush home: milk, bread, and cheese. Getting the last two items was no big deal, but as you made your way to the refrigerated section containing milk, it was clear that you might not leave the store with the half-gallon you’d wanted.

You were about to turn around, giving up on the milk entirely when you saw one left, sitting at the very back of the section. Quickly, you made your way to it, hand outstretched and ready to grasp the handle. But someone beat you to it. With a spin of your heels, you turned to face the person who had taken the half-gallon you were going for. The guy in question seemed to be oblivious that you had even been there, let alone reaching for the same thing as him. A small sound of frustration escaped you at the loss. It appeared you wouldn’t be having coffee this week, not unless you woke up earlier to stop by a cafe on your way to work.

“Are you okay?” A voice broke through your thoughts of having to endure Mr. Dunne without being properly caffeinated.

Your eyes locked onto the guy who had just barely managed to swipe the milk from you, all without realizing he’d done so. “Yeah… Yeah, it’s just that was the last of the milk and I need milk for my coffee. I’m now going to have to handle my boss without coffee. Let me just tell you, I have never known someone more frustrating than him!” You complain, hands waving in the air when talking about Mr. Dunne. A second later, after seeing the guy’s bewildered face, embarrassment crept up on you. “Sorry, you probably didn’t need all of that information. Umm, I’ll be on my way now.”

You had maybe made it a couple of feet before you felt something being placed into your basket. Tilting your head, you spotted the same guy you’d just been conversing with. The milk settled in your basket.

He gave you a small smile. “I figure you need this more than me, I don’t need it to put up with my boss.”

“I-Uh… Thank you. No, really, thank you so much!”

His eyes shone with a gentleness, this paired with the way he nodded at you before turning around had you calling out for him to wait.

“Yes?”

“Umm, well… Could I maybe treat you to coffee sometime to thank you?” You asked softly.

“I’d like that.”

It wasn’t until a week later that you were both able to meet up for coffee. Chan, you’d learned his name when exchanging contact information, was kept almost as perpetually busy as you were. Everything had started smoothly, a light chatter being upheld as you ordered your drinks and paid. But that chatter has long since faded and you felt awkwardness creeping up on the two of you. You, for one, were staring down at the table, every so often your gaze flickered over to Chan sitting opposite you. Wracking your brain for anything to start up the conversation anew was slightly frustrating. Any way you typically knew how to create a conversation had fled your mind, leaving you alone with frantic thoughts along the lines of ‘how do you converse with someone?’.

Finally, the silence was broken by Chan himself. “So, what do you do for work? I remember you mentioning that your boss is pretty difficult.”

The tension in your body eased off as you were freed from thinking about how to start a conversation. “Yes! He really is hard to put up with. My job is kind of odd, I work for the government but not in one specific area. The man who works over me, my boss, has duties in multiple departments and since I’m his assistant, I also technically work in multiple areas as well.”

“I’ve never met anyone who works for the government before. What’s it like?” He asks, tilting his head.

“Well, it’s not easy, that’s for sure. Right now I don’t exactly have high clearance so I deal with all the paperwork and subsequent tasks for my boss. Basically I do the grunt work, make reports and file things to make his job easier.”

Over the next year, the two of you grow closer. Near constant texting turns into spending practically every spare moment together. You’ve come to find you simply enjoy Chan’s presence, the stress, and tension held in your shoulders because of work lessening when he’s around. It wasn’t uncommon to spy the two of you together at a cafe in the early morning hours, or grabbing takeout before heading to your apartment to watch movies. During this time you learned more about each other than you think you’ve ever learned of someone in only a year.

If someone asked, you could tell them his favorite elementary school teacher, the way he likes his coffee, his favorite water brand, that he’s a sensitive soul, when he lost his first baby tooth, or how he broke his arm in high school; Not to mention so much more. The same could be said for him, even some of the more embarrassing moments of your life that you had spilled while drunk. Granted you weren’t alone in your ability to embarrass yourself while drunk, you had more than enough ammunition to tease him on the regular. However, you found yourself wishing for more, just a little bit. Your heart swelled at the mere thought of him, and the way your other friends teased you about him always managed to make you blush furiously.

It was hard to tell if he felt the same way, even though the few times your other friends had spent with the two of you had convinced them he was most certainly interested in you as well. They managed to hype you up to this point: inviting him over for dinner and telling him how you felt. Just the thought of having to say those words ‘I don’t want to be just friends’, made your heart hammer in your chest. Speaking of, Chan’s due to arrive any time now, meaning it’s time to double-check everything. Chicken bolognese was doled out perfectly on two plates, finished just a few minutes ago, joined by a sweet wine settled in the decanter your sister gifted you over the holidays.

Digging your teeth into your lower lip, you wondered if this was too much, or too serious. After all, neither of you had ever had a dinner like this together before. Thankfully a knock at the door put an abrupt dent in your harried mind.

“Is this too serious?” You ask after showing him to the small dining area. “It is, how about we just go eat in the living room?”

Chan laughs quietly. “Whatever would put you at ease.”

“Living room it is then.”

Moving the food was no difficult task, and soon enough you were settled on the couch, feet tucked underneath you. With the television on in the background, conversation flowed as per usual. Quick rundowns of your days before moving on to different topics, most of which were based on different articles one of you had read. Just as you finished dinner and were preparing to tell him, you received a text from Mr. Dunne - who was no longer your boss, since you’d gotten promoted a few months prior, but you still worked with him on important proposals - informing you of an emergency related to the new draft you were working on. Apparently an official from the country you were trying to work out an agreement with had sent in new demands.

After apologizing profusely and being waved off by Chan, who understood the importance of your work, you grabbed your laptop and proceeded to work in the living room. Despite having to work through quite a few new emails relating to the issue, the conversation continued in a relaxed manner. Until all the wine hit your bladder, and you excused yourself to go to the bathroom, setting the laptop on the coffee table and rushing off. You took a bit longer than usual, checking on your appearance, making sure not a hair was out of place. Maybe your cheeks were a tad pink, but it was hard to tell if it was due to the alcohol in your system or if you were preemptively embarrassed.

Neither option truly mattered it’s not like slightly pink cheeks suddenly made you unattractive. Taking a deep breath, you exited the bathroom, an anxious smile tugging at your lips. Normally Chan could always tell when you were coming back and he would call out to you before you even made it to wherever he was. This time he didn’t. This time, he was leaning forward, eyes glued to the screen of your laptop, fingers tapping away at the keys. A chill went down your spine. What is he doing? Did he need to look something up? Why didn’t he say something if he needed to use your laptop?

Creeping closer as silently as possible, you peered over his shoulder to see what he was looking at. At that moment you had the urge to throw up. Your stomach gurgled as the food you’d just consumed felt like it was souring in place. Why would he do this? Was he using me this entire time? To get information? How long has he been doing this? Your eyes stung with unshed tears, your lungs felt like they were on fire. You stumbled back, unable to stand behind him any longer, a choked breath alerting him of your presence.

Chan’s head whipped around, eyes going wide at the sight of you. “I didn’t hear you get back.”

“What were you doing?” Your voice came out shaky and you could feel your hands trembling at your sides.

He smiled nervously, his hand going to the back of his neck. “Nothing, I was just looking at the forecast for the week.”

You head spun. He lied to you. You caught him, he had to know that you saw, and he blatantly lied to you. “Don’t. Don’t lie to me. Why were you looking at my work files? You know those are confidential.”

He tried to play it off by looking embarrassed by his actions. “I’m sorry, I got curious. You’re always talking about it but you can never get into specifics.”

“Stop! Stop treating this as if it isn’t a big deal! I invited you over to tell you I’m interested in being more than friends, and you- you… You’re lying to me.” You back away from him, shaking your head, a stray tear sliding down your cheek.

“You want to date me?” He asked standing up, lips parted in surprise.

“Don’t change the topic,” you say harshly. “Tell me what you were doing. Is this the first time you’ve gone onto my laptop and accessed confidential files?”

It took a minute for him to answer, a minute that felt like an eternity. “It’s not the first time.” Your sob echoed in the room, causing him to move towards you with a distressed look on his face. “Wait, please, you don’t understand —”

“What is there to understand? You used me! I could get fired because of you!”

“Please,” Chan begged, stepping forward to grasp your hands in his.

You ripped your hands from him. “Was anything out of your mouth the truth or was everything a lie? Did you ever consider what would happen to me if it’s discovered I was the one you took information from? You know what, I don’t want your excuses, those are left to real friends. And that’s something you’re not.”

“Please, just let me explain.”

Shaking your head, you point towards the entrance to your apartment. “Get out.”

“Please,” he breathed, eyes watery as he stared at you. You felt your heart shatter.

“Leave. Get out. Now.” You set your jaw, looking away from him as more tears slid down your cheeks. “Don’t make me say it again.”

His footsteps sounded on the wooden floors as he walked away, getting softer with each step he took. Once the sound of the door being opened and shut echoed in the apartment, you felt your legs give out. You didn’t have the strength to get up, remaining on the floor as you felt the world crumble around you. A mess of emotions warred within you: disbelief, rage, betrayal, sadness. What are you meant to do now?

#spring season stories #a.c.e #a.c.e fanfic #a.c.e scenarios #a.c.e spy au #a.c.e angst #a.c.e yuchan #a.c.e chan #a.c.e chan fanfic #a.c.e chan scenarios #a.c.e yuchan fanfic #a.c.e yuchan scenarios

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talpup · 5 years ago

Text

Crossroads: 4

Summary: Loss will make a person do terrible things they never thought themselves capable of doing. Things like wanting the mobsters responsible for your little brothers death to pay so badly you’ll summon a Demon to make it happen.

Maya did just that, but little did she know that the Demon would ask for her soul as the price. Or that when she refused give it to him, he would put her in the path of someone possibly much worse.

Kai is offering to help her but what he wants is so much more than her soul. He wants her everything.

Please remember, this fic is rated explicit and has warnings of sex, violence, and other possible triggers. For a full list of story tags please check the fics AO3 (link to that at the top of my tumblrs homepage).

SORRY for the delay. I recently started re-working and posting Lost Song, a fic that has beasts, spirits, and sprites with human forms. And focuses on a love triangle between Sphinx!Aizawa, Dragon!Kai, and Reader/OC.

*A bit of a reminder. This is a 1920's au. Though the term Mysophobia was coined back in 1879 there were a lot of things that people wrongly thought about it and how to best help those suffering from it.

4.1

Soon after he had sent Hari to follow Maya, Kai had ordered the severed head removed and his entire office scrubbed down. Though he hadn’t touched the filth himself, he had the overwhelming need to get clean. Hives already starting to break out on his skin by the time he had reached his rooms, undressed, and started the shower.

Stepping out of the steamy bathroom, skin raw and red but feeling fresh and invigorated, Kai moved over to the wardrobe. White towel wrapped around his waist, he looked over the tailored suits. It was silly. Though he always took care of his appearance, he never really fussed over what to wear. But he was now.

Maya had left him. And though she would be coming back never to leave again, he wanted to do everything in his power to make sure she willingly stayed and accepted him. Small as it was, part of that included how he appeared to her. He reached out almost grabbing one of his finer suits but stopped. What if dressing up wasn’t the answer but dressing down? Maya, for all her beauty and intelligence, wasn’t a city girl. She was from a wholesome country place. It was one of the many things he first liked about her. What if a perfectly fitted, expensive suit wasn’t the answer and only made her feel uncomfortable rather than special?

Decided. Kai dressed, did one more important thing, and then made his way back to his office. He passed the maid on his way in. “Everything cleaned?”

“Yes, Sir.”

Kai sniffed. Even with the ornate plague mask the smell of harsh cleaner burned his nostrils and soothed him. “Did they tell you to pay special attention to the desk?”

“Yes, Sir. I did just as Mister Shin instructed and went over the desk four times.”

Kai frowned. The head had been on a platter. It had never touched his desk. It was unreasonable to want an entirely new desk when the filth had never touched the wooden surface.

His mother's voice echoed in his ears. ‘It’s just a phase, Kai. Quit being so difficult! The doctor said covering you in the thing you hate will help. No one is going to tolerate this peculiarity of yours. No one will love you with it. Just be a good, normal boy and get over this already.’

Banishing the memory, Kai ordered. “Go over it again.”

Accustomed to and slightly afraid of her employer the Maid didn’t question or argue, simply turning around and doing as he commanded.

Kai sat on the sofa while she worked. The very same sofa Maya had sat in. He found himself comforted by that thought. Somehow feeling closer to her despite her current absence. He had to get her back. Hari would see she was brought back no matter what. Though he hoped Maya came willingly. It would be so much easier and pleasant for them both if she were willing.

When the Maid was finally done, Kai sat at his desk. He felt a slight itch at first, but pushed the feeling down. He had seen the woman clean the desk. He didn’t need a new one. The head had never even touched the desk. As time worn on he was better able to ignore the itchy feeling until it was completely forgotten, his mind totally focused on his work.

“Kai.” Shin stopped at his Leader’s open office door. He blinked, eyes widening for a fraction of a second before regaining his composure. He had never seen his Boss so dressed down, rarely even seeing Kai with his suit jacket slipped off. It was strange, disconcerting even. Like seeing his favorite club dancer out of costume and on the street in regular clothes.

“What is it?” Kai questioned, lifting his eyes from the orders he was writing.

Shin cleared his throat. “They’re back. Hari’s pulling up the drive.”

Thrilled as he was, Kai didn’t show it. Capping the fountain pen, he set it down on the desktop.

He got to his feet, exchanging his plague mask for the less sinister dust mask that would put Maya more at ease. His gloved hand moved to straighten his tie then remembered he wasn’t wearing one. “Order me a new desk.”

“Of course. What would you like me to do with that one?” Shin questioned.

Kai passed the man, eager to greet Maya at the door. “Burn it. Take it down below. I don’t care. Just so long as it’s gone by morning. It’s filthy.

“Yes, Boss.” Shin nodded, coveting eyes fixed on the massive desk, wondering if it would fit in his corner station down below.

4.2

Hari put the car in park. He hadn’t spoken to Maya the entire trip. And was thankful she hadn’t spoken to him. What he had seen. Her speaking to no one as he secretly followed her down the road to her house. He had seen breaks of madness before but that… He knew if he had to tell Kai. What would the Boss say? What would his Boss do? Was Kai so consumed with Maya that he would keep her? Try to fix her?

Stepping out of the automobile, he went around and opened the door for Maya. Numbly, she stepped out.

Hari grimaced at the state of her. Stockings torn. Shoes and dressed covered in filth from having walked the dirt road. There were dried tear tracks marring her pretty face. And her eyes were red and puffy from crying. She was a mess.

Kai swung the front door open. Glad as he was to have her back, he hadn’t planned on greeting her too warmly. Maya had hurt him. Her ungratefulness at his gift, her venomous words, and running off the way she had should have see her receive a well deserved lesson. But all his hurt and ire fell away the moment he saw her. She was so dirty. Looked so broken and small.

Without hesitation, Kai rushed to over wrapping her in a protective embrace. “Sweetheart! I’m so glad you’re back. You never should have left.”

He could feel his skin begin to itch from being in contact with someone so dirty. But this was Maya. His sweet, beloved Darling. His concern for her overrode everything else. He pulled back, gloved hands smoothing over her mussed hair. She was such a mess! What had happened to his beloved? Why hadn’t Hari taken better care of her?

Sharp gold eyes fixed on his Lieutenant.

For a moment Hari could've sworn that Kai’s stern eyes glowed. He swallowed, under his Boss’ angry, accusing stare.

Kai turned away. He would deal with Hari later. Right now Maya needed him.

“Sir--” Hari was about to tell Kai about what he presumed to be Maya’s mental break when his Boss scooped the filthy woman up into his arms. Hugging her in her state had been a surprise enough. But picking her up… He fell silent deciding to wait till morning. That was if Kai didn’t realize for himself before that.

“You’re home, my Sweet. I got you.” Kai murmured, caring her into the house and up the stairs.

Entering his quarters, he made straight for the bathroom, setting her down.

“Maya.” Kai pulled off the dust mask and gloves. “Look at me, Darling.”

Maya simply stared at the penny title floor. It wasn’t that she didn’t hear Kai’s voice, it was just so distant, her sense of loss overwhelming. When headlights had blinded her, Hari stepping out of the car, Maya had felt relieved. She might’ve lost all she had left of her baby brother but Kai would help her get her revenge.

She hadn’t thought to question why Hari was there or how he had found her. Even now her mind was so dazed and dull from her loss that she let Kai move and undress her.

“Let’s get you clean. You’ll feel better after a nice, warm bath. Loosing your home like that--” Kai stopped. His eyes lifted to Maya’s, cursing himself.

She had seen that he and Hari hadn’t spoken. Knew that he shouldn’t yet know about her home. If she caught the slip and questioned him… Maya was clever. Would she piece together that he had sent men to burn the place down days ago? It had been done so she would have nothing to return to should she try and leave him. And clearly it had been the right decision.

Thankfully Maya’s unfocused gaze was still on the floor.

Kai’s hands resumed. This was his first time undressing her. It should have been full of heated kisses and searing touches. Her hands and eyes should have been on him, not dead on her lap, gaze on the floor. This night should have gone so differently. But he pushed the bitter thought down. Maya need him. She would undoubtedly be grateful for his care. And the thought of her showing that gratefulness had him focusing on the task at hand.

Turning off the tap, he checked the bath water before lifting her up and setting her in the tub.

Maya sucked in a breath.

“Too hot?” Kai questioned, dipping his hand in once more. He preferred near scalding water, and had made sure to temper his preference with cooler water for her.

Honeyed eyes watched her. But she didn’t make another sound, her expression blank.

Deciding that the water was fine, Kai picked up a fresh washcloth. Kneeling beside the claw foot tub, he lifted her arm. The limb moved without resistance. Dead weight in his hand.

He had let her leave figuring that seeing she had no place else to go would make her accept her place here with him. But seeing her now, he wondered. It cemented in his mind that she should never be allowed to leave again.

“Sweetheart. Look at me.” Kai bid. And to his immense relief and pleasure, she did.

Though her eyes were still glassy and unfocused, her head turned.

“I was worried about you.” Kai told, brushing her tear-stained cheek.

Maya merely blinked. It was like loosing her brother all over again. It was possibly even worse as now she had literally nothing to remember him by. Nothing but her memories. She couldn’t forget him. She would never forget him.

Kai’s eyes raked over her naked body. He used the washcloth to clean her sweet face, gaze following the rivulets of water that ran down her neck and chest. It wasn’t suppose to be like this, his first time seeing her disrobed. He had fantasied about bathing with her. Lovingly and methodically scrubbing each others flesh after a heated lovemaking. But just because things hadn’t turned out the way he had planned didn’t mean… No. He was trying to earn Maya’s love and trust, not force and break it.

This weak inner play of desire and focus of task tugged at him as he bathed her. It couldn’t be denied that he was enjoying himself. She was just so warm and soft. So beautiful. So perfect. And like this, she was almost doll like. A perfect living doll for him to do as he pleased.

His hands and the washcloth lingered more and more as he moved from her arms and back, and worked up her legs. With nothing but a soapy square of terrycloth between them, Kai’s hand moved up her inner thigh. “You should never have left. You belong here. With me.”

Her body went taught, a sound between a grunt and a whine escaping her lips.

For a heady moment Kai thought she was responding to his touch. But a second later he realize that, while that might've been the case, it wasn’t in the way he wanted.

Maya’s noise hadn’t been one of pleasure but pain.

In scolding and telling her of her place, Kai had lost himself for a moment. As he had done so, his fingers had dug into her tender, subtle flesh. With silent censure, his hand released. She would no doubt have bruises marring her lovely skin come morning. Bruises that hadn’t occurred in heated amore. Would anything this night go right? At least he had her back. But that was becoming an increasingly small comfort given the way he had imagined this night going down. Especially when he wouldn’t have let her leave if he hadn’t been sure he would get her back.

With her legs and stomach done, Kai paid special attention to her chest. There was no more pretending that this was just about getting her clean.

Maya shivered. Goose flesh erupting over her skin.

Kai scrubbed all the harder around a perking nipple. “Doesn’t that feel good, my Sweet? To get and be clean. We will be doing this from now on. A man should take care of his woman in every way that he can. And the ways I can take care of you, my Love.”

“Kai…”

“There she is.” Kai smiled. “I knew all you needed was a bit of tending and stimulation to have you fully returning to me. You had me worried, my Sweet.”

“The water’s cold.”

“No worries. I’ll warm you up.” He laid the washcloth over the tub and pulled the stopper, letting the water drain.

Rising to his feet, he grabbed a fluffy white towel.

Though she was now more with it, Maya allowed him to stand her up. She felt a slight embarrassment at him drying her. But her mind was still so lost in the events of the night that she did little to try and hide herself.

Reluctantly, Kai slipped a silk rode on her, tying it loosely around her waist. “Come, Darling. Let’s move to the bed where it’s more comfortable.”

Maya followed, towel hanging over her shoulders.

Kai sat her down and sat behind her, hands taking up the towel to properly dry her hair. “Feeling better?”

Maya hummed, drowsily. It was so tempting to fall asleep, hoping that when she woke all of this would turn out to be a bad dream.

“I will always make you feel good.” He breathed against her hair.

She shivered.

Kai set the towel aside and took up a brush.

Turning back to her, his eyes landed on the lounge beside the bed. Or more correctly the book left on the lounge. He had pulled it from his hidden stash to look it over for something to help should Maya prove difficult upon her return. But Maya was being far from difficult, though she obviously wasn’t the only one having a hard time keeping a clear head.

His gaze flicked back to her. She hadn’t seen it yet. With the love Maya had for books, she would’ve asked about it. Kai cursed his forgetfulness. He would gladly give his Darling anything she wanted so long as it was safe and wouldn’t cause her harm. But answers about that book. The contents in it. Such things would definitely make her unsafe and potentially cause her harm. He hadn’t even made Hari or Joi aware about that book or his past dabblings with it. And his care for them was far less than his care for Maya.

He glanced at Maya, grateful that she knew nothing about such things. And silently vowed to do everything in his power to make sure she never did.

He quickly unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it off, tossing it over the book. He always got up before her. He would put it back in its place in the morning.

“My house was gone.” Maya muttered, barely aware Kai had moved behind her, let alone taken off his shirt.

“You’re house is fine.” Kai soothed. “It’s here. With me. This is your home.”

“Burned to the ground.” She went on barely hearing what he had said.

Kai rested his hands on her shoulders. “Sweetheart. I know you see this as a tragedy. Something that has greatly hurt you. But perhaps it is a blessing in disguise. That place wasn’t your home. Not anymore.” He turned her to him. “Your place is here. With me. Forever by my side.” His fingers tenderly brushed her cheek. “Your my girl, Maya.”

Maya’s heart clenched, tears welling with fresh tears. “Everything I had left of him was in there. It’s like loosing him all over again. I have nothing now. No one.”

“You have me.” His thumb brushed away a fat tear that rolled out of its banks. “I have no doubt that it hurts right now. But I will give you more than your justice. I will give you everything. You are not alone. I will give you new, happy memories. Your life with me will be so full of love and joy that you’ll forget all that you have lost.”

His words tumbled about in her head, their meaning barely registered. All that mattered was that Kai was here. That he had accepted her back. That he seemed to forgive her justified but rude outburst. And that he would help her get her vengeance.

His voice was deep and smooth. Reassuring and alluring. Like beckoning sirens call, she was drawn to it. Drawn to him.

She had lost everything that had ever meant anything to her. Her brother. Her very reason for being. The only picture she had of him. The pillow and clothes that had carried his scent. The house that he had brightened with his smile. Filled with his joyous laughter. It hurt too much. If she continued to focus on it all she would break. She couldn’t break. Not until she had avenged him.

Needing to feel something, anything else Maya leaned forward and kissed her handsome savior.

Kai startled for a fraction of a second at her making the first move. But he recovered instantly. His arms wrapped around her, lips moving when hers didn’t. Teeth lightly nibbled at her lower lip. Tongue licking, seeking entrance.

Maya pulled back. What had she done? She had been angry at him. Though sitting here she could barely remember what their argument had been about. Everything had faded after the sight of the burned house.

“Kai…” She shouldn’t be doing this. Encouraging him when he obviously wanted more. But she had just lost everything. And the pain and anger, it was overwhelming. She needed to feel something other than heart-wrenching loss and rage. And Kai was here. He was willing and wanting, and just so handsome.

Kai’s heart and body was set ablaze by her tender kiss. And now that he had had a taste he wanted more. Needed more. All this time he had resisted. Held himself back not wanting to scare her away by demanding. But she had made the first move. And now that she had it would be perfectly acceptable for him to make the second, third, and four.

“Darling.” Kai’s hand buried in her hair, the other pulling her onto his lap. His lips were on hers, tongue pressing, all but demanding entry.

Letting go, Maya opened her mouth to him. Her hands rested on his shoulders, neither pushing or pulling.

Leaving her breathless, Kai moved on to her neck. Kissing and sucking at her tender flesh. Even though this night hadn’t gone the way he had planned, it would still end the way he had wanted. Maya would be his completely. She wanted him too. She had made the first move. Had kissed-- She had made the first move…

Kai pulled back, eyes sharp. Expression stern. “You’ve done this before.”

At his accusatory tone, Maya lifted her chin in defiance. The look was ruined by her quivering lips and shining, shame filled eyes. “Only cause I had to.”

A different kind of fire ignited in Kai’s chest. “You were forced!”

Her hands moved to her robe, clutching the fabric closed at the base of her throat. “Forced to survive and provide for my brother. Rent was hard enough to make in good times. When he got sick and I had to miss work to stay home and care from him…” She took in a shuddering breath. “I could've done without a roof over my head. But a young boy needs a home. Stability. I did what I had to to see he always had a shelter and enough food in his belly not to starve.”

Kai stared at her. His teeth gritted so tightly together his cheek started to twitch. This beautiful, sweet creature. His beautiful, sweet Beloved had her innocence stolen! A part of her purity that should have been meant for him. For him alone to have and take.

“Your Landlord.” Kai spoke, the rage evident in his voice.

She nodded.

“Wha--” He cleared his throat feeling sick and murderous at just the thought of the question. But he needed to know. “What did he ask of you?”

“Enough.” Maya muttered, eyes downcast. Too much, she thought. But it had been for her brother. She would’ve, and still would do anything for him.

She didn’t dare look at Kai. Would he hate her? Find her disgusting and soiled? She surely was both those things and more. Even if it had all been done for her brothers sake. Kai was obsessed with cleanliness. And despite the recent bath, she was far from clean.

Kai’s hands curled into fists. That man. That sick, depraved villain had taken advantage of his Darlings situation and need to provide. He had used it to force her to… No. He couldn’t even think of it. Couldn’t bare the thought of it. His poor sweet Maya. She had needed him and he hadn’t been there. It further proved that she could never leave his side. She was too good. Too innocent and beautiful. People would take advantage. She needed to be protected. He needed to protect her.

“Was he the only one? This landlord?”

Maya nodded.

He would have him killed, Kai thought. He would send Hari-- No! He’s eyes fell on the shirt and the book beneath it. He wouldn’t send Hari. He would handle it himself.

Kai turned back to her. “Did you ever get pleasure from it.”

“Of course not!”

“I didn’t mean it like that, my Sweet. I meant--”

“No.” Maya said cutting him off. “He never took the time to try. It’s the one thing I’m grateful for.”

“That he didn’t take your first orgasm.” Kai said, warming to the idea.

“Please. I don’t want to talk about it any more.”

Kai hugged her against his chest. He was definitely upset that he wouldn’t be her first; but he didn’t blame Maya for it. He, more than anybody, understood that sometimes one had to do unsavory things.

“You will never have to think or talk about him again.” He promised, kissing her head. “In fact, consider him gone. As good as dead.”

Maya’s head raised at that. It was one thing to seek vengeance for the innocent life of her brother, but something completely different to do so for herself. “Kai--”

“Shush.” Kai hush, lightly kissing her lips. He turned them and urged her to lay back.

“Kai! What are you--”

His hand glided from her waist to her hip, and down the silken skin of her leg. “I told you to hush, Darling. The only sounds I want to heard coming out of you’re pretty little mouth are sweet mewls as I show you.”

“Show me? Show me what—ah!” “There it is.” Kai sighed, a knuckle grazing up between her legs. “That’s the sound I want to hear.”

“Kai…” This was too fast. Too soon she wasn’t ready. Didn’t want-- Her body tensed, his finger dipping further between her folds. A jolt of electric pleasure rushed through her when the digit brushed her clit. “There! Oh! Kai! Please! There.”

“Don’t you worry, Beautiful. I know just where you need me. Just what will have you singing and coming apart for me.” His hand turned, fingers dipping down to her entrance to collect and spread the first sign of her juices while the other tugged at the belt of her robe, undoing it.

Maya’s legs snapped shut around his hand. No! Good as it felt, this wasn’t right. Kai was...obsessed. She knew it. Had seen and ignored it.

Nothing’s changed, she argued with herself. You still need him to get revenge. You were willing to do this if he demanded before. At least he’s gentler and more caring than that stinking, old landlord. Its his caring that scares me. It isn’t right. Isn’t normal.

“Maya.” Kai’s voice held a teasing censure. “I can’t please you if you don’t let me. I need you to open those pretty legs for me, Darling.”

“I--” Maya stared up at him. Behind him his shadow looked— She blinked. Whatever it was, was gone.

“Come now, Sweetheart. Give me room to work and I’ll have you forgetting your own name.”

Forget. That was what she wanted, wasn’t it? To forget the landlord. Forget all that she had lost when the house burned down. To forget the sight of that severed head. And drown out, replacing the screams and blood and death of that horrible day her brother died.

“Kai. Make me forget. Please.”

Kai leaned over her. “I will, my Love. I will make you forget every terrible thing. Everything but me and your life here. We belong together, Maya. Together, we will build a new and wholesome world where killings and fires never happen again.”

Her eyes widened. This was wrong. What he wanted was wrong. The amount of death it would take to make his perfect world. No one could live up to that standard. Not even Kai himself. Especially not Kai himself.

Her thoughts were driven away by his lips. She sighed into his hungry mouth. Legs spreading of there own accord as her hands gripped his shoulders. She had made a deal with a demon. What more would it hurt to give herself to a devil of a man if it meant seeing her vengeance done? It wasn’t as if Kai had demanded anything of her. He didn’t want her soul. Merely to take care of and love her. After all this time, it would be nice to be the one taken care of.

“That’s it, my Sweet. Give yourself to me and I’ll make you forget. I’ll make everything alright.” His lips gazed up her neck to her ear. “You’re never leaving me again. You’re mine.” His fingers pushed into her wet heat, thumb pressing tight circles into her clit.

Maya’s back arched up off the bed. “Oh! Ka—Kai!”

“Such a pretty sound. Make some more for me.” His fingers curled, and she did.

Maya moaned and screamed his name as he worked her with long, thick, skilled fingers.

As badly as he wanted to kiss her, he wanted to watch her more. This was their first time together. Her first time feeling such pleasure. Such an event should be marveled at. Committed to memory. It wasn’t as if they wouldn’t be doing this at least once a day from now on. He could already imagine taking a long afternoon break, delighting fully in her after she had sat on his lap all morning, keeping him warm.

His cock thrummed at the thought and he grimaced at the wet spot that blossomed in his underwear. He would satiate his own need soon enough. But first. “You’re so close for me already. Tell me. Do you want to cum?”

“Yes!” Maya panted, hips bucking up to his hand. “Please, Kai. Please!”

“Say it. Say the words.”

“I want to cum. Please!”

“And who do you want to make you cum?”

“You! Ah!” Her nails dug half moons into his shoulders.

Kai hissed, muscles rolling at the sharp heady pain. His fingers slowed, thumb lifting off her. “Such a good girl for me.” He hummed, smirking at the way her quivering walls tried to milk his fingers. “I don’t think you’re fully satisfied yet.”

“Huh?” She breathed, feeling light as a feather.

“Don’t worry, Darling. I know exactly what will see use both satisfied.” He got to his knees and paused, lifting his slick coated fingers. Almost on impulse, he pushed them into her face. “Clean those for me.”

Maya’s mouth opened to question, but as soon as her lips parted his fingers pushed in. She made a strangled noise.

“Just use your tongue and suck.” Kai instructed, assumed by her flustered blush. He had just fingered her and was about to do so much more. Cute as it was, she had no reason to be shy or embarrassed. He would know and control everything about her. She was his.

Maya’s lips closed around his fingers, doing as he said. She had never tasted herself. It was...interesting. Not bad, but not what she would call good. It was sharp, musky, and somewhat sweet. A distinctive taste that she’d never be able to describe if asked. With a start she realized it was a taste distinctly hers. Her taste.

Her eyes flicked down, wondering what Kai tasted like. No! That was… Bad? Good? Disgusting? Would he want her to use her mouth on him? It was something the landlord had like to have her do. Though it hadn’t been her using her mouth so much as having her mouth be used. Thankfully the dirty slob liked to finish on her face.

“So good for me.” Kai murmured pulling his fingers free. His hand returned to his belt, undoing it and his pants. He caught Maya watching in interest and smiled. He didn’t know anything about the scum that touched her but he knew he was better. It wasn’t arrogance. It was fact.

When his pants and underwear pulled down, and cock sprung free, Maya gulped.

He smiled at her expression. “It’s alright, Sweetheart. It’ll fit. I promise.”

Maya doubted that. It was long and thick. Just the thought of it being put in her made her legs and cunt quiver.

“Do you want to touch it?”

She shook her head, despite the desire to do so.

Kai frowned. He grabbed her wrist and pulled it to him. Before she could pull back, her fingers were being wrapped around his length. It was even bigger than it looked. Her hand appearing small, unable to fully circle around it.

“There’s a good girl. See. Nothing to fear. I would never hurt you. Your mine, Maya. And I always take care of what is mine.”

As soon as he released her, she pulled her hand away. Her palm missed the throbbing heat, feeling clammy and cool.

“Kai!” Maya squeaked as he lowered over her, propping himself up on an arm. “Please be gentle.”

“Of course, my Love. I’ll try.” His other hand cupped her cheek. “You made me wait so long.”

Days she thought. They had known each other no more than two weeks.

“You must understand that I don’t like waiting. But I did so for you. Because I love you.” He frowned when she didn’t reply in kind. He knew she loved him. She had to. She was here. Giving herself to him. She was his. She had to love him just as much as he loved her. “Say it, Darling. Tell me you’re mine.”

Maya sucked in on her lips. She wouldn’t lie, so she did the quickest thing she could think of. Distract him. Her head lifted, arms wrapping around his neck.

Kai hummed when her lips met his, her mouth eagerly opening for him of her own accord. It was further proof of her love. She was just shy. Had probably never said the words to anyone that wasn’t family. He scowled, kissing her in return. She better have never said such words to anybody that wasn’t family.

The taste of her filled his mouth. It made him want to sample straight from the source, but his cock was aching. He had waited so long for her. He was done waiting. There would be time enough to taste and claim every part of her later.

Taking himself to hand, he ran his length through her wet folds and pressed the head to her entrance.

Maya whined. It wouldn’t fit. It wouldn’t fit. He was going to rip her apart.

“Maya. Relax.”

Gold eyes stared down at her. Her breath caught. She could swear that they had glowed for an instant.

He pushed in.

Maya gasped.

Hand lifting, Kai cupped her face. She was so beautiful and sweet. As badly as he wanted to sheath himself completely, he held back went slow.

Hips rocking, Kai’s thick length entered her inch by inch until he was seated fully in to the hilt.

“There.” Kai smiled, thumb brushing her cheek. “I told you. You should never doubt or question me, my Love.” In fact, if she did so again he couldn’t guarantee that it wouldn’t be met with swift punishment.

“Kai.” Maya whined, the sound far different from the one moments before.

His pride swelled at her needy tone. “Are you ready for me to move?”

“Yes. Please.” She breathed.

Despite his need, he started a slow, sweet pace, letting her fully adjust to the feel of him. As great as his need for more was, he didn’t want to hurt her. Fingers rolled her nipples, his ears enjoying every sound she made. Big as he was, he hardly needed to angle his thrust to hit the spot inside her, but he did, wanting to give her the most pleasure.

“Ka—ah—i!” Her back arched, toes curling.

Damn! She was so tight. His perfect little darling. She was so good and pliant. So obedient. Well, almost. There was one thing she had yet to do for him. One thing he needed to hear her say.

His thrusts deepened, hips snapping against hers. The sound of skin slapping skin mixed with her wanton cries. It was beautiful. She was beautiful. “I love you, Sweetheart.”

“Kai. Ple—please! I—I need--”

“I got. Just what. You need.” Kai said in-between thrusts. “But first. Let me hear you. Say it.”

“Say. What?”

“Tell me. You love me.”

Maya’s eyes widened. Her hands slid down from his shoulders to his chest, though she resisted the instinct to push him away.

Kai grunted, Maya tightening around him. “Say it, Sweetheart. Don’t be shy.”

She moaned, his hips grinding down, rubbing against her clit.

“Say it, Maya. Let me hear you.” It was like a beast had been unleashed. Kai had known he wanted Maya, but he hadn’t realized how consuming the need had been. He more than wanted her. More than needed her. He needed her to want him. Needed her to see him as her everything, just as she had become his.

His pumping hips slammed against hers making her breasts bounce.

Maya found it difficult to breath. And not just because she was so close again. It felt as if he were fucking the air out of her.

Kai’s hand moved between them, pressing against her clit. He had wanted to be gentle. Told her he would try to be. But pleasure was pleasure and she was being bad by not saying what he wanted. On top of that, there were still her disrespectful words and reaction from earlier this evening. She deserved a little roughness.

“Who do you belong to?”

“Y—you! Ah! Ka—i!” Maya writhed beneath him.

“Tell me. Who do you love?”

“You!”

“Say it!”

“I—ah! I love you! Kai! Please! Please!”

Kai’s eyes practically glowed. He had gotten what he wanted, but he didn’t let up. “That’s it, Beautiful. Come apart for me. Cum for me. Just. Like. That.”

She screamed, nails digging scratches into his back. Her orgasm heightened by Kai’s own. His cock coming alive, spitting its hot seed deep inside her.

He hovered above her a moment, panting as they both came down from their highs. Finally, he brushed her hair back. “You did so good, my Sweet. Admitting your love for me. I’m so proud of you.”

“I--” Maya paused. He looked so happy. Was giving her so much. What was one lie if it gave him what he wanted while he gave her what she wanted? It wasn’t as if she disliked him. In truth, given time, she could see herself maybe coming to love him. It was just all so new. They hadn’t known each other for more than two weeks. It was better to let him believe, than hurt him and chance not getting her revenge.

You’ll regret this, a small inside voice told. He’s controlling and obsessed. But she ignored the voice. So what if he was a little controlling and obsessed? She was getting what she wanted. She would do anything for her brother. Even if it meant lying in order to see the men who had taken her brother from her punished and dead.

Looking up at him, Maya smiled sweetly. “I love you, Kai.”

This chapter was a tough one for me to get a handle on and write. It's my first somewhat consensual smut with Kai, my first smut for him being a rape scene in my Chaos fic. So any comments, thoughts, or constructive criticism would be greatly appreciated.

As always, an extra special thank you to @inorganicone2230 for their encouragement and friendship. I couldn't have done this chapter without your help and input. Heck, that goes for ALL my fics. Huzzah! For 'proofreading'. lol Seriously though, you really are the best my friend. THANK YOU!

Taglist: @shadynebula – Hope you’re feeling better today.

#kai chisaki #chisaki kai #yandere!overhaul #yandere #hari kurono #bnha #my hero academia #fanfic #ao3 #crossroads

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natsunoomoi · 4 years ago

Text

Oh yeah, addendum to the other post from earlier because I went to bed after I found it, but yeah. I found the spot where it talks about it finally. But just annoyed because I think it was an issue with like textual clean up or my phone browser at the time screwing with me as I went back and forth to the translation notes that it probably wasn't as clearly input into my memory the first time around. I don't have ad blockers on my phone so when I was originally reading it I was having formatting issues that I think distracted my reading sometimes. I still managed to remember quite a lot of details in general for the plot, I think, but I remember it was frustrating to try to get to the end. Checking now on my desktop and the formatting issues are near nonexistent so it's easier to read and jog my memory that oh yeah I did read this part.

But also still annoyed that it's improperly cited on the wiki cuz ugh, that's not how you write a wiki. Proper chapter citations, yo. It is in 81 not 92. *facepalm* Still kind of wondering where that other part I read when I started this book was mentioned? Still haven't seen that at all.

I think also I remember I was a bit more concerned about the overall meaning of what the ending meant too than what Qinghua was saying. Like the way everything turned out in the book it was really sweet and all and I like Qingqiu and Binghe together, but I was and still am really concerned that they only really work as a couple in this book specifically because of the circumstances of the book. I can understand people IRL are repressed or don't think about their own sexuality and maybe discover it later or under the right circumstances, but at the same time the way things unfolded also gives me some concerns. It's more possible that someone who is straight might only think so because it's just the normal accepted type of relationship we see in our modern society so they don't question or explore it so they don't know, but at the same time, I'm also concerned because your sexuality doesn't just change because of one person either. IRL if someone is not into you, they're not into you. I'm a little worried as well that the relationship between the characters is also a little coercive. Like when we're talking about enthusiastic consent IRL it means for all partners and both people in a relationship should thoughtfully respect the other's boundaries and needs, and unfortunately, Binghe tends to not respect boundaries. It makes for good comedy and cuteness in a fictional work, but a lot of young people also read this book and it worries me a bit what some people might learn about relationships in that regard.

Like this maybe a separate thing, but like thinking about the consent in the relationship in this book reminds me of a Reddit post I saw where this one guy was asking for advice about a situation with his gf where his gf would only sleep with him if he put on Sasuke cosplay and she wore Naruto cosplay and basically they acted out her BL fantasy. And like he was very kind and onboard with her roleplay because he wanted her to be happy, but also like when he asked to maybe not do the cosplay, she would get upset and refuse to be intimate with him in any other way. And like, yeah, the situation is very funny, but because this is a real life couple you can see how when only one person bends to their partner's desires and needs, it can leave the other person feeling unheard and empty. As hilarious as it sounds, a lot of people were very sympathetic for the guy and feeling for him cuz like he was doing everything right and giving it a try for her and then also just approaching her maturely and trying to talk about his own comfort in that regard and she wasn't hearing him. So similar to how I feel bad and afraid for that guy, I actually feel kind of concerned and afraid for SY/Qingqiu a little. Like if both of them were my friend IRL, I would legit be worried that Binghe wasn't always listening to Qingqiu's needs. The relationship needs to be an equal give and take or at least balanced, but one side tends to take more and act more selfishly, and it's like, you only feel worried and want them to talk to each other more and grow because you want them to be able to last together.

Still kind of getting into the other books, but in comparison the other relationships in the other two books seem to be more positive and supportive. Like TGCF seems to be the most healthy and functional as an actual relationship.

Also a bit concerned that Airplane's original outline was a teacher x student relationship. Like we can argue it's okay for SY cuz he's not really Qingqiu, but that relationship being the original outline is also risque and that is NG at worst and a huge risk at best. Like it was viewed bad enough already that Qingqiu was written to eye Ning Yingying, it wouldn't be viewed any better if that part of the original outline was in it too. On the plus side the way SVSSS plays out Binghe is an adult already when the situation happens and it is at a more appropriate time, but the optics are pretty bad just because of like ideas of society that a master is like a parent and a disciple is like a child. It's also related to the titles and such that they call each other like shixiong, shidi, etc. They have family dynamics with each other so it's not great. It's not like there aren't some situations IRL where teacher and student become a couple, but in many circumstances it's highly inappropriate. The underage issue is the normal problem. But if they are grown and it is later when you are no longer their teacher I've seen some couples where it worked out, but it's a situation of consenting adults at least. Still a little concerned about the power imbalance dynamics. In IRL situations that's a big thing too. Other than age, one person being able to affect other parts of your life on a whim is a huge stressor on a relationship you don't need. I can kind of understand how it would have worked out in a positive if like Qingqiu had shown empathy for Binghe when they first met because their lives mirror each other's, but like a lot of the other things Qinghua added into the story like the extent of Qingqiu's traumas being played out as asshole behavior became huge barriers. Like I mentioned, with just his traumas it would be very difficult for him to be able to have even a deep friendship with other men, which is similar to how IRL people in real life don't have a chance to explore themselves because of various issues and stuff in society. But also Binghe being ultimately unhappy by just doing what the world thinks he should do and not what he wants on both an in-world level and a meta level. We don't get a whole lot on Shen Jiu, so I'm really curious how that would have actually worked on his end because he seemed really broken, but it's impossible to parse out what of the original plot we can imagine to remove to understand the original outline and how it would have happened. He was very alone and even though the pipa player called him a friend, it doesn't seem like he was able to have a close enough friend to talk with or confide in at all. But is that isolation part of the original outline or part of the PIDW plot?

Anyway, it's things like that that I think about all the time and that's why I end up going into dives into the wiki cuz I want to like think about something and want to check notes real quick to make sure I'm thinking about it right. But the wiki is unreliable. Like also there was one part where it says that the bad cultivation manual was only something the other disciples did to Binghe, but in SJ's POV chapter he literally says that he gave him the shitty one. The wiki also claimed that him pouring tea was also actually an application of medicine misunderstood, but I haven't found any evidence of that either and it's just stuff like that that send me into a rabbit hole that derail me from my original thoughts I'm trying to work out.

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thatwasthenightthingschanged · 5 years ago

Text

5 years of being clean

Here’s my annual mental health recap :) Not sure whether I will keep doing them next year, but I hit the five years mark today (my 14 yrs old self reading this would be like NO WAY oof) so I figured it would be a cool thing to do:) The text is below the cut (so u don’t have to scroll endlessly on your dash) and you can also find it on my personal blog :)

(tumblr desktop wouldn’t let me put these three pictures next to each other, I’m sorry akdshkajd)

To start it off, I genuinely never thought I would reach a mark like this, ever. Like I so vividly remember being 14 and thinking, okay I’m gonna start this journey but I don’t truly believe I will actually be able to keep going. Yet here I am. Huh.

I feel like so much about myself has changed over the past year. I feel like a totally different person compared to back then but also still the same? If that makes sense. When I read through last year’s post this morning I felt kind of estranged by it but at the same time I can definitely recall how I was feeling last year. (btw, if you want to read through each year’s post, here are some links: 2019 2018 2017 2016)

Okay, enough nostalgia, here’s some stuff I was struggling with over the past year and new things I’ve learned.

The past year has been a year of many changes for me. First of all, I had to let go of someone who for a long time really supported me through difficult times, but changed and left me feeling bad about myself. It has actually taken multiple attempts to finally cut things off, and while I do feel sad and angry about it quite a bunch of times, I know it was the right decision in the end. And I’m proud of myself for pulling through with this, for finally standing up for my self-worth for once. Because I deserve more than people who treat me shitty.

Moreover, this quarantine time has really taken a toll on me and my mental health. I find myself obsessing over the way my body looks in a way I genuinely have never before since I barely move outside at the moment. I’ve also had some really, really dark days. What helps me get through it is focusing on my uni work and regularly exercising and going outside.

I’m getting more and more comfortable with my sexuality. I’m out to my parents now, and while sometimes their homophobic behavior really wears me down, I know I can get through it because I have the most amazing friends who support me as much as they can. Honestly, so many of them have offered to let me stay with them in case my parents react extremely negatively and I’m so, so thankful for that. (I actually still get a little teary-eyed when I think about that)

But probably the biggest change, the one that truly changed my life completely, was my girlfriend. It’s kind of funny, because you can plan for things like falling in love as much as you want but then you still end up finding it in the most unexpected places, at the most unexpected of times. In retrospect, we both chose actually the worst time to fall in love with each other, but it still worked out. Because we both wanted it to.

And honestly, just being around my girlfriend has made me more confident. She is really confident herself, and I admire that so much about her, that it makes me want to go outside of my comfort zone more. She also opened me up to the world of fashion omg! I mean, of course I was a little bit interested in it before, but I’ve never really consciously used fashion to express myself and even though I’m still at the beginning, it’s so much fun already and it really boosts my self-confidence to wear something I feel like I look great in.

As I’ve never been in a relationship before, I had to really closely examine my behaviors and habits and recognize toxic behavior that I have used in the past when it came to love and actively work to better myself. One of such things is communication. Perhaps you know how long it took me to really learn that it’s okay for me to tell others about my problems and my feelings, that I’m not a burden for doing so. With her, I realized that when it came to romantic encounters, my “strategy” with dealing with arising problems was mope about it on here but never actually talking to the other person and communicating my issues and working through them. But this time, I really wanted things to work out so badly, so now whenever I feel upset about something, I just tell her. And we talk through it. And most of all, she doesn’t mind that I sometimes overthink stuff and might interpret things wrong, she always is the epitome of patience and love and that is honestly so refreshing.

And through her eyes, I start seeing things that I thought were my flaws in an entirely new light. For example, she likes that I think so much about stuff and thinks it’s actually cute that I always have the need to always express my feelings at all times. I used to think I was “too much” for people, that I have to stop feeling things so intensely and that people will only find that annoying. Now I know it is my biggest asset. And that has also changed my relationship to other people, as I have noticed that it’s okay to just freely express my feelings because the right ones will always understand them, and you might feel even closer to them. She makes me bold and brave and these are two adjectives I never would’ve used to describe myself before.

So, this was my past year. I don’t know in what mental health state I will be this time next year, this time in three years, in five years. But maybe that’s also the fun about it. The unpredictability of where you’ll end up and what you will have learned.

Before I’m done with this post, I need to make a special shoutout at this point because it has been five years and that person honestly truly deserves it, for all that she’s been helping me through. Nadine @feminst4life has actually been following me for so long now, and I remember whenever I made posts about feeling really down or thinking about giving up because bathing in your bad feelings is just easier than trying to stay optimistic, she told me to keep going. And I don’t know if it is signivicant to her, but it really meant a lot to me and her support helped me so so much so I had to make a cheesy paragraph in here about her. love you Nadine 💕

And thank you to anyone else who ever sent me messages cheering me up when I was feeling down. It means more to me than words could ever express. Thank you. I love you 💕💕💕

xxx Sarah

#being clean

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snow-lavender · 5 years ago

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The Last Day of Unwellness

AKA, “Henrik questions his reality and the rules that govern it.”

Word Count: 2736

And another one! Thanks for reading if you do!

AO3 Link Here

Henrik rushed into his living room. “Shit, shit, shit!”. He peeled off his scrubs and threw a button up shirt on, kicking off his shoes as he went. Checking his watch, he saw that it was 8:07. Even after explaining to his superior, he’d still been forced to work an extra half-shift at the ER. It was only because of his co-worker’s pity that he was home at all.

He rushed to his desktop, where the call was already ringing. He ran his hands through his hair, trying to smooth it down a bit, then accepted the call.

A young, grinning face filled the screen. “Papa! You’re late.” she scolded.

Henrik laughed. “Well then, you’ll have to visit soon to keep me in line.” He switched easily into French. “How are you, sweetheart?”

Natalie’s smile widened a bit. “Good! I got a 78 on my arithmetic test!”

“That’s wonderful! And such an improvement, I know you worked very hard at that.” Henrik’s eyes shone with pride. She’d been struggling a lot with the subject, seeing her succeed made his heart dance.

Natalie nodded. “You helped! I understood you much more than my teacher. Can you help me next time, too?”

“Of course. I’m your father, it’s my job to help you. Ask your mama, and I’m sure she can set something up anytime.” Henrik leaned back in his chair. “And how is the drama club coming along?”

“Wonderfully!” Natalie started bouncing with excitement. “We’re going to choose a play next week. Everyone is super nice, and the teacher lets us change things and play around if we want!”

She talked for another half hour, gushing about her friends and recounting stories from class. Henrik stayed mostly quiet, nodding and gasping at appropriate times. He hung on every word, eager to know as much as he could about his daughter’s life.

“And then Adam, you know, from last year, he talked about submarines, but he couldn’t remember-” Natalie was cut off by a chime from Henrik’s phone.

Henrik sighed as he flicked away the notification. “I’m sorry to cut you off, but it’s getting late. You need to get some rest for tomorrow.”

Natalie pouted. “It isn’t that late, Papa. I can deal with it.”

“Not on a school night. How about we compromise,” Henrik said. “We can talk again on Friday, and you can finish your story then.”

“Okay…” She perked up for a second. “Have you gotten my gift yet? Mama said she mailed it this morning!”

Henrik chuckled. “It will take a little bit more time to get here. I promise, when I pick it up, you will be the first to know.”

“Alright, if you promise.”

“Cross my heart.” He replied with a smile. “Can you put your mothers on? I need to speak with them.

“Okay. Happy early birthday Papa. I love you.” Natalie said as she slid out of the computer chair.

“I love you too, more than anything.”

She left the room, and a moment later, two women walked in. “Henrik!” Liesel sat down, smiling. “How are you doing?”

“A little tired, but not bad. And you?”

“They hired an assistant librarian, so things are a lot easier now.”

Henrik nodded. “About time. They were working you to the bone. This is much healthier.”

“See, Henrik agrees with me about that!” The other woman interrupted. “Listen to him, darling, he’s a doctor.”

“Good evening, Simone. I saw an advertisement for your latest line on the tram today.”

Liesel gasped. “All the way in Berlin?” She turned to Simone. “Dear, you didn’t tell me! That’s wonderful!” She smiled wide. “I knew your branching out would go well.”

Simone laughed. “Yes, well, a certain woman has given me an… appreciation for the more average people.” She kissed Liesel on the cheek. “They complain much less, for one.”

Liesel retaliated by kissing Simone on the nose. “I’ve already heard people talking about how nice it is to have high fashion be more accessible to them.”

Henrik felt a flash of envy in his gut, but pushed it down with a smile. “As have I. One of the ER nurses was very moved today, almost to the point of tears.”

Simone looked rather moved herself. “Truly?”

“Truly. I think she was already a fan of your work, but still. It had such a large impact on her.”

Simone just stood there, smiling. It was nearly the most emotional Henrik had ever seen her. She shook her head after a moment. “Enough of that. This is a business call.”

Liesel snorted. “Only you would call this sort of thing a business call, dear.” She turned back to the screen. “Henrik, is everything taken care of on your end?”

“Everything is good here. Vacation days taken and tickets booked.” He smiled. “I assume you didn’t actually put Natalie’s gift in the post?”

“No, no, don’t worry.” Liesel assured. “And she doesn’t suspect a thing.”

“Thank you so much for coming up with this plan, both of you.”

“Of course! You only have so many birthdays left, you should take advantage of them.”

Henrik sent Liesel a look. “You’re older than I am.”

Liesel just laughed. Simone bent over. “Darling, the cake,” she whispered

“Oh! Yes, Henrik, what sort of cake do you want?”

Henrik shook his head. “Just being able to be there is enough. Don’t worry about anything else.” “Chocolate, then.”

“I will not object if there is a chocolate cake,” he relented. “But please, don’t overwork yourself.”

Liesel waved a hand. “I have the day off work, I’ll need something to do.”

Simone lent in and kissed her cheek. “I’ll be there to make sure she rests. We have a busy weekend ahead of us, don’t use everything now.”

“Ah!” Henrik broke in. “I did tell Natalie that we’d have another conversation over the weekend. Just a fair warning, for excuses.”

“Well, you’re not wrong. You’ll have plenty of time to talk then.” Simone said. She checked her watch. “I’m very sorry to cut you off, Henri, but I have an emergency call with a house in LA in 10 minutes.”

“Of course, of course. Have a good night, the both of you. I’ll see you on Thursday.”

“Goodnight, Henrik. Sleep well.” Liesel said with a smile.

Henrik smiled back. “I’ll try.”

Both of them waved, and the call disconnected. Henrik leaned back in his chair, a grin still on his face. He knew he’d spend the next few days thinking of nothing but his departure. But he couldn’t help it. Spending time with his daughter, especially face to face, was a gift he rarely had.

The smile dropped. He knew that this outcome was for the best, that this way made everyone happiest, himself included. But still, he felt small stirrings of discontent. He wanted to have these conversations every night, to hear the stories of the day and not just of the week. He wanted ...well, he wanted more. He wanted what he had had before.

Henrik shook his head again, trying to rid it of these thoughts. Those wouldn’t help anyone. Best to move past them before he started stewing again. Personal growth, and all that.

He sniffed, frowning. He really needed to take a shower before his whole apartment smelled like an emergency room. Out of the chair he went.

Suddenly, he heard a zapping behind him. Henrik turned to see...something, floating in the centre of his study. It looked like a sort of orb made of green light, but his logical brain wouldn’t let him believe it. He definitely needed more sleep.

Henrik turned back around, starting to unbutton his shirt. He tried to weigh the pros and cons of showering versus going straight to bed. He could always just wash the sheets…

Before he could think any further, the light behind him flashed and his vision went white.

>=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=<

“Ah!”

Henrik fell backwards into a sofa. Not his sofa, just a sofa. He looked around in confusion.

He, somehow, was in another living room. It seemed normal, some furniture, a television, a few boxes strewn about. It would be completely normal, if not for the fact that he’d been teleported here, an act that was scientifically impossible.

From another room, he heard someone yell in English, “Where did you want this one, Marv?”

And another voice, slightly closer, “Just leave it in the hall for now! I’m going to add a few things to the bookshelf, be right there.”

A man entered the room, holding another box. Two more followed behind him.

Boxes, that is. Not men. There were floating boxes following him.

Henrik gaped. The other didn’t seem to notice him. He simply walked over to the bookshelf, thumbed through a box, and picked out some old looking tomes, placing them as he went.

“Was zur hölle?”

“Aah!”

The other man yelped, dropping the book he was holding. The boxes fell to the floor. He grasped at his chest, leaning against the wall. “For fuck sake, warn a guy..next..time.” He spoke haltingly, finally noticing Henrik. “Oh. Hi?”

“Hello?” he replied hesitantly. “Who are you? Where am I?”

“Uh, yeah, shit. Hold on a second.” The other man walked to the door and leaned out. Henrik belatedly noticed that a porcelain mask was covering half his face. “Hey, Seán, Jackie, get in here! You were right!” He yelled.

“Right about what?” a new voice yelled back.

“The sketch! Just come to the living room!”

Mask man turned back. “Sorry about that. I’m Marvin.”

“Henrik.” He stuck out a hand to shake, but Marvin didn’t take it. Instead, he continued speaking.

“So uh, sorry, but you’ve kind of caught us at an awkward time. Sorry for the mess.”

“Mess?” Henrik looked around. “I do not understand.”

“Oh, this room is fine, but just wait until you see upstairs.”

At that moment, two others walked in, one, a teenager, and the other, maybe six, seven years younger than Henrik. The older one spoke. “Um. Hi, I’m Seán. You might want to sit down, we’re gonna be here a while.”

>=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=<

The four of them were now sat in the kitchen, a few pizzas spread out on the table. Seán and Marvin were demonstrating magic for an enraptured Henrik, who was quickly amassing a pile of notes.

“So each of you has a certain source to draw from?” he asked, not looking up.

“Sort of. Most people have one they work best with, and then talented magicians can get one or two extras that are a little harder to access.”

“Most?”

“Yeah, there are witches and wizards, not a gendered thing, by the way, and then there are mages.” Marvin explained, absentmindedly twisting plants through his fingers. “Like Seán.”

“And the difference is…”

“I can draw from all sources equally, but it’s a lot harder to get at them.” Seán spoke up through a mouthful of pizza. “And then there’s people in completely different categories, like Jackie.”

The teen waved from the counter. “I have superpowers!”

“I..okay, I am filing that away for later.” Henrik said. “...I do not understand any of this.”

Seán shrugged. “Neither do I, and I’ve been learning this stuff since I was three. World’s fucking weird. You seem to be coping pretty well, if you’re taking notes already.”

“This is my coping.” he replied, brandishing his papers. “If something is strange, I make myself understand it.” He looked over the four piles. “I haven’t even gotten into this whole character business.”

“Maybe you should take a break.” Marvin said. “Let your brain catch up, and have some pizza.”

Henrik sighed. “Alright. But I want to be able to get back to this later. There must be some sort of explanation. If only..”

“If only what?”

“Well. I would like to be able to ask questions of you all the time, to clarify this situation. These situations, rather.” Henrik said. “But with the distance between here and Berlin, this is impossible, of course.”

Seán looked at him, confused. “Is this your roundabout way of asking to move in with us?” “Perhaps.” Henrik admitted. “After a while, of course. It seems like you are in the middle of moving someone already.”

“I mean yeah, man, of course! We might have some trouble finding room for ya..” Seán looked around the kitchen. “Someone’s going to have to share rooms.”

Marvin made a face. “I can’t. It’ll already be too crowded in there with all my supplies. Another person would be dangerous.”

“I’ve got the biggest room,” Seán said, “but I go to bed super late. Would that wake you up?”

“Likely not. And I would need a job here, which means strange ER hours. Would that wake you up?”

“Honestly, probably not. I sleep pretty deep.” Seán leaned back, stretching. “So that’s that, then. It’ll take more time to move, since you’re German, right?”

“More time compared to what?” Henrik asked.

“We’re Irish, we didn’t move countries.” Jackie piped up.

“Ah. Then yes. But not much, I expect I would be settled by the end of next month.”

“Cool. The couch is yours for the night, I gotta go work.” Seán stood up, putting the dishes in the sink. “Night, all.”

Marvin and Jackie waved back. Jackie opened his mouth, but Marvin shushed him. “No way. I know you have that test tomorrow, go to bed. I’ll deal with Henrik.” The teen humphed, but left without argument. Marvin turned back to Henrik, looking mildly uncomfortable. “You all good?”

“I will be,” he replied, “after some thought and a good night’s rest. I will need to leave early in the morning, I have somewhere to be.” Thank the lord he still had his wallet on his person.

“Okay, no problem.” Marvin motioned for Henrik to follow him into the living room, then threw him a pile of blankets. “Sleep well.” he said, then left.

Henrik stood for a moment longer. “You as well.” he said to the empty room. Then he kicked off his shoes and lay down on the sofa, settling in for the night.

>=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=•=<

“Papa?” Natalie gaped from the door.

“Surprise.” Henrik smiled, arms open. Natalie flew into them, grabbing his chest.

“What..you’re here!” she said, eyes wide.

Henrik laughed, lifting her up. “I’m here.”

Simone and Liesel also walked out, arm in arm. Liesel held a sloppily wrapped package. “Here you go,” she said to Natalie. “I kept it safe.”

“You knew!” she accused. Taking the gift, she walked back over to Henrik. “Mama and Mère helped me! But I did most of it.” Simone snorted. “She did.”

Henrik took it slowly. “Well, thank you! How on earth did you know I wanted a paper wrapped box for my birthday?” he joked.

“Papa! Just open it!”

“Alright, alright.” Henrik shifted and carefully unwrapped the box. He took out the tissue paper and froze. In the box was a pottery bowl. It was sloppy in some places, but fully functional. And painted over it...

Oh, painted over it was a recreation of the painting Henrik had made for Natalie’s nursery, over a decade ago. The colours were almost identical, the strokes nearly all the same. Henrik was absolutely speechless, tears forming in the corners of his eyes.

Natalie was looking at him, concerned. “Is it okay?”

Henrik didn't reply. He just set down the box, dropped to his knees, and pulled Natalie into a tight hug. “I love it.” he whispered, trying not to cry. “And I love you, so very much.”

Natalie hugged back, then pulled away. “Come in, it’s almost dinner time! Mama made crepes.”

“I also made a chocolate cake, as promised.” Liesel added with a grin.

Natalie turned to her. “That’s what that was for? I thought it was for your book club.”

Henrik chuckled, wiping his face. “Of course I’ll come in, if you don’t mind me weeping all over your furniture.” He picked up the gift box.

Natalie grabbed his hand, pulling him into the house, and Simone and Liesel followed.

Needless to say, it was the best birthday Henrik had ever had.

#writersofjack #writers of jack #dr schneeplestein #dr schneepelstien #henrik von schneeplestein #marvin the magnificent #jackieboy man #jacksepticeye fanfiction #fanfic #jacksepticeye egos #septic egos #my writing #the last day series

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battletowered-archived · 5 years ago

Text

Coming Out

||Drabble! No Trigger warnings apply as far as I know, but it’s decently long so its under a cut lol. Happy Pride Month Everyone, Ily||

Leon wrung his hands nervously, biting his own lip as he looked down at the paper in front of him-- the scribbly handwriting on it was probably only legible to him. That wasn’t mentioning the amassing pile of crumpled papers and scribbled out notes that were on his desk and scattered next to the wastebasket to the side of him.

He'd been spending some time researching all of this-- he wanted to set a good example. He might not be Champion anymore but that didn't mean he didn't still have people who followed him online and who looked to him to be a good influence on his younger fans. He'd had to remind himself a few times of why he wanted to do this-- He wanted to be able to finally be wholly himself. He wanted to try and offer comfort to others who were in his position, especially with his younger fans-- he wished he'd had someone there to talk to him when he was that age. He'd figured most of it out on his own with the occasional help of the Internet after he’d realized that he was starting to develop crushes on his male friends, too.

He just wished he could have a practice run. He guessed he sort of had already-- his mom knew. She'd found out after an awkward conversation when he was seventeen where he’s outright asked if he was gay. She’d been accepting, thank Arceus, but that had been the most awkward and uncomfortable conversation he’d probably ever had. Not to mention he’d fumbled so badly-- “I’m not gay but I’m… not quite straight either” is what he’d said, if he could recall. He’d eventually explained what he’d meant by that, but that first day he’d been so relieved that he’d cried for like an hour in his mom’s arms. That wasn't exactly what he wanted to do here, and he wouldn’t feel like he’d succeeded if that’s just what he got out here, he was to the point in his life where he knew he had no reason to be ashamed of it but that didn’t stop the anxiety that was bubbling in his guts.

A practice run… Oh, Wait… it was getting late but he didn't think she'd have gone home by now. Plus she'd always said he could call her if there was trouble… Does this count as trouble? He hesitated for only a second longer before he reached over and pressed the speaker call button on his phone, trying to even his breathing. No going back now.

"Amelia? Could you come here for a minute? I need your help, please."

-_-_-_-

"...so, uh. Will you help me?" Leon kept his eyes firmly locked on his hands, where his fingers were locked tightly. It hadn’t been graceful, but having notes in front of him helped a bit. He could still hear the nerves in his voice, though.

"Awh, Leon, baby, is this why you've been nervous all morning?" Amelia sighed. "You're all worked up over this?" Leon's hands flexed a little tighter.

"Yeah I… I… I'm afraid." He chanced a glance up at her, only to see that she was giving him a kind look-- it reminds him so much of his mom.

"Leon, you know this doesn't change anything you've achieved. People will still love you no matter who you love. Sure there might be a few people who can't accept that but they're the ones that are the problem. Not you." Leon can't help the relieved whine that escapes his throat and he honestly feels like he could cry. "Of course I'll help. Just tell me what you need me to do."

Leon laughs, and ducks his head, trying to stop the tears that are starting to well.

"I'm sorry I don't know why I'm crying…" Leon sniffles, his throat feels tight. He hears Amelia shift in her seat, but is surprised when he feels her place a comforting hand on his shoulder. He glances up at her and she offers him the tissue box from his desk. He smiles a watery smile at her and takes a few to dab at his eyes. "I should be excited, right?"

"Well, not necessarily. You just said you're scared, I think that's pretty reasonable. It's a big change." She rubs his back softly, and offers him another motherly smile. "Even a good change can still feel strange and scary. I was that way when I was getting ready to ask my husband if he wanted to try and have our son. He'd told me plenty of times that he wanted kids but it's still something new. It's ok to be a little afraid of it."

"But what if I'm not ready for this? What if I don't know enough yet-- or what if someone starts asking me questions and I don't know what to say." Leon can feel the panic swelling in him again. "Or what if--"

"Leon." Her tone is strict-- enough to make him shut his mouth. "Being pansexual is part of who you are, right?"

"Yes."

"And you want people to know that?"

"Yeah."

"Then you're ready. Nobody expects you to have all the answers. You're only human. I’m not telling you to force yourself if you’re not ready but... if you're already sitting down and thinking about how to do it and imagining the ifs, ands, and buts about what you're gonna do after the fact… Well, do you think you'll be happier and feel better?"

"I know I will…"

"Then I think you're ready. You've got this bad tendency to overthink everything with that head of yours." She smiles at him again and ruffles his hair gently to punctuate that point. “I think you should do it if it’ll make you happier. You can’t live your life always doing everything for everyone else. Sometimes you need to do something just for you because you know it’ll make you feel better and make your life better.”

"I… okay. You're right. I want to do this. For me...” Leon raises his hands again, wiping at his eyes and nose with the tissue and trying to breathe. His leg is still bouncing nervously, but he really does think she’s right. He’s been thinking about how much easier it would be to just… be after he came out. It felt like he always had to lie by omission and it was getting so hard. It felt like it hurt him a little bit every time he had to pretend that this wasn’t him. “Let me just... Let me clean up my face before I do but I'm… I think I'm ready. Thank you."

“Of course, Leon. Just tell me how you want me to help.”

-_-_-_-

In the late evening of June 13th, 2020, on Leon's social media there's a video post-- the first video post he's made in a little over a year along with a caption that just reads "I'm finally talking about something I've wanted to for a long time."

The video starts focused on Leon at his desk, eyes ever so slightly red as he shuffles through the papers on the desktop and looks up at the camera.

"I've been thinking about making this video for a long time. About if and how and when I wanted to do it. If I would be able to get my words right or if I had to do it a certain way but...I was helped to realize today that I can. I don’t need to keep putting myself aside because I’m afraid of what people will think of me. I’m safe to be here and to do this, and even if it’s scary for me that’s alright. I’m allowed to talk about myself.

I want to be perfectly honest because I've felt, for a long time, that I haven't been able to be. Because I wasn't ready, and I was afraid but I… know that there will be people who still love me and are there for me and I'm so thankful that they’re a part of my life. And if me, doing this, can help to comfort and validate someone else then I’m glad, but… I think I need to do this for my peace of mind.”

He pauses, looks down at his notes for a moment, and takes a deep breath. Letting his eyes close for a moment. It's a brief few seconds before he looks back up to the camera in his rotom phone.

"I'm sure it's no secret that I've been an ally to the LGBTQ+ community for years. I've participated in Wyndon pride several times in the past, and I have many friends and peers who are a part of this community. There is nothing to be ashamed about for loving whoever you love-- and there never will be. It’s an amazing community full of brave people, and it’s one of the most loving, helpful, and compassionate communities that I’ve ever had the privilege to be a part of, and I… really owe it to myself and to my friends and family who have supported me to be honest.

So… so today I'd like to tell you all that I'm pansexual. I love people regardless of their gender. I can develop feelings for people who are men, or women, or wherever they might identify on the gender spectrum. I’m sure that’s a surprise to some people, and probably not a surprise to others, but it’s something that I’ve known is a part of who I am for a long time.

I've never been quite sure of how I wanted to say it, but I don't want to keep this part of me a secret, not when it’s something that makes me feel like I can’t be who I am and especially not when it's something that someone else might need to hear to know that they're not alone. I have nothing to be ashamed of-- I’m happy with who I am and I’m so thankful that I know that I have people who are in my corner to support me for who I am.

And even if me saying this might be for me, right now, if it helps even one other person to feel a little more comforted about who they are then I’m glad. I’ve been so lucky to have been accepted in the LGBTQ+ community from the very first day, even if I wasn’t out, and I genuinely hope that I can continue to help and support others. People who might have been in my situation, or people who are out, or people who haven’t been given the privileges that I’ve had and who need them. I just… want you to know that even if you’re not there yet that I’m proud of you. You’re strong, and I’m proud of you even if you’re not able or ready to be out yet. And I owe a massive thank you to the people who have and who continue to support me. You inspire me and give me more courage than you could ever know.”

#Leon || Keep your eyes ahead and your mind open #Drabbles || Written Histories #||he did it im proud of him||

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juniperwindsong · 5 years ago

Text

Necessary Monsters (3/16)

Summary:

"Brought her in on my shift, they did. Thought she were dead! Pale as a corpse - like there weren't no blood left in her - but twitching, like. The way I used to see 'em back when...You-Know-Who's followers were torturing people left and right. You'd see 'em twitch like that when they'd had the Cruciatus Curse used on 'em too long."

It takes twelve and half minutes to walk the road leading from the Hogwarts grounds into Hogsmeade, then a matter of seconds to apparate outside the Leaky Cauldron in London. Add four more minutes to enter the crowded pub, climb the stairs, and wind down the hall to the room at the very end, and Felix has had just enough time to work himself into a respectable frenzy.

Felix has never been able to pinpoint the exact date he fell in love with Juniper Windsong, so he can't say definitively just how long he's been planning their reunion. But it's been the highlight of his thoughts for almost a year. The perfect evening, carefully orchestrated to show Juniper how he's come to feel about her and persuade her to feel the same. Gone to pieces.

He slams the door, the parade of ruined moments and wasted opportunities building enough furious momentum behind his arm to rattle the frame. Throwing his cloak over the room's mouldy winged armchair, Felix runs his fingers irritably through his hair. He should have been more direct, he berates himself, kicking petulantly at one of the chair's wobbly legs. It gives an indignant "Oi!" and scoots away from him, nearer the fire. He had hoped to let his actions explain his feelings for him, even thought he'd done a halfway decent job in spite of the evening's rocky start. But replaying their conversations in his head, Felix fears he wasn't obvious enough.

Regret beats a heartless rhythm against the inside of his skull as he perches on the edge of the rickety bed. Juniper did want to see him over the summer, he consoles himself, that's something. And she had seemed genuinely excited at the prospect of visiting him. And there was that moment in the common room, their fingers intertwined, faces so close Felix could almost feel the nervous excitement radiating from her. He's positive Juniper had been waiting for him to lean in just a bit more, even imagines her eyes had flicked for a moment to his lips.

Felix falls back against the lumpy mattress with a groan. All that means nothing if she gets herself killed next year. Felix had so hoped finding Jacob Windsong alive would finally put a stop to her amateur investigations. But he knows with a sinking certainty, in spite of her assurances that she wants to leave the Cursed Vaults behind, Juniper will never be able to escape their web while her brother is still caught in it.

And even if she survives her last year of school unscathed, he thinks miserably, there's always her excessive number of male friends. Juniper may have little interest in them now, but Felix knows better than anyone how much a relationship can change in one term.

His brain bruised by the weight of all the things he cannot control, Felix pulls his wand out from underneath him and points it in the direction of his valise.

"Accio," he mumbles.

The bag sails halfheartedly across the room and stalls at the foot of the bed. Felix uses the tip of his shoe to edge it closer to him, his hand fumbling for the catch. He reaches in without looking and, as he does whenever he feels anxious, pulls out a sheaf of parchments wrapped in a leather tie, heavily frayed and dangerously thin in places.

He tugs at the crude binding carefully, toying, as he often does, with the romantic notion of finding a ribbon, preferably Juniper's, to replace the leather. But he's never known her to wear any kind of ribbon in her hair. And anyway, Felix thinks as he pulls out a particularly worn piece of parchment, he doubts a hair ribbon would wrap all the way around their collected years of correspondence. He settles back against the pillow and lets the words he knows by heart soothe its anxiously racing beat.

Since his graduation, Felix has received more letters from Juniper than he can count. This by itself isn't exceptional. He's received many letters, far more than he expected. Former classmates write occasionally with updates on their lives, Barnaby writes regularly for advice, and even his mother sends the sporadic note pleading with him to return home. But it's Juniper who writes with questions about him. Juniper, to whom Felix recounts his days, even the most boring and difficult bits. She has the uncanny ability to read past his affected formality, and Felix soon discovers there's no one else with whom he can truly be himself.

After months of rough tenting with bad food and very few actual dragons, it's Juniper Felix complains to, and Juniper who both sympathises and challenges him to stay his course. When he's forced to kill a dragon for the first time in defence of himself and his team, it's to Juniper Felix relays the entire gut-wrenching affair, complete with the horrid guilt he feels and the nightmares he cannot shake. And it's Juniper who comforts him with words like a balm, that he reads through each night to lull himself to sleep. Her letters become the best part of every month, and he begins counting the days until they arrive.

It's after the end of his first and only relationship, nearly a year ago, that Felix begins picking Juniper's letters apart, studying them as intently as if he'll be tested on their contents. He re-reads everything she's ever written, parsing each word for hidden meaning, anything that might indicate she cares for him as more than a friend or confidante. Some days Felix is convinced he can read love plainly in her words, then the next day he's sure he imagined it. The uncertainty drives him to distraction, until admitting the depth of his feelings actually seems like the less painful option. But it has to be done face to face, Felix decides, that’s the proper way. And after the Quidditch match on which so much of her school reputation is staked seems like the best time; when she'll either be full of high spirits or in need of comfort.

Felix sets the worn letter aside in agitation. It's no good. He's reached a level of anxiety he's only ever been able to soothe by writing to Juniper about it, which he can hardly do in this case.

An idea appears in Felix’s head fully formed, and he sits up abruptly. Why not just tell her in a letter? Felix had convinced himself love was something that must be discussed in person, that the month spent waiting for a response to such an admission would be unbearable. But he's no longer at the mercy of inter-continental post. Her return letter might even reach him before he left England. And he's always been better able to express himself in writing.

Perhaps his prose can do what his actions couldn't and convince her to keep herself safe. For him.

Reinvigorated by this new plan, Felix scrambles off the bed. He pulls parchment, quill, and ink from his bag, and seats himself at the spindly-legged stool in front of the room's token writing desk. A small window looms behind it, the darkness outside transforming the glass into a black mirror reflecting his face, every line quivering with purpose.

Felix dips his quill in ink and pauses briefly at the top of the parchment. The ink drips slowly from the quill tip after one minute, and then another, and then several pass without him pressing the point to the page, as it dawns on him that he has not the first idea how to begin such a letter. Which seems impossible; he's composed snatches of letters like this in his head for a year, waiting for the perfect moment to pen them. But now it's time, words seem to have deserted Felix, just as they did in the common room and out on the grounds.

Because it has to be perfect. That's key. Whatever he writes has to convince Juniper to put aside a quest that's become an obsession, persuade her his love is worth such a sacrifice. And Felix is positive it is. There isn't a person alive, including her brother, who cares for Juniper more than he does. Felix is certain of that.

A small, confident smile flickers to life on his lips, and Felix begins to write. Haltingly at first. But he finds as he focuses on Juniper’s smiling face, the memory of her cheek pressed against his fingers, the words come easier, and it isn't long before he's pouring his heart onto the page. He confesses to the parchment everything he's felt for Juniper since he was seventeen, allowing emotion to choose his words instead of adherence to any literary form. Felix writes until his parchment is exhausted, then leans back from the desk.

He holds the letter close to the yellow candle illuminating the desktop in uneven patches and reads what he's written with a critical eye; and then again, trying to see the words from her perspective. With a slight shake of his head, Felix sets the parchment back down and picks up the quill again, crossing out lines and adding words in, until any ordinary candle would have melted into its iron holder and sputtered out.

By the time the sky outside the window lightens to a steely grey, Felix has finished a draft he likes. Perhaps it would be hubris to call it perfect, he thinks immodestly, but it's certainly close. He folds the parchment with extreme care, as though excess creases may cause her to simply throw the thing away without reading, then tucks it delicately into an envelope and seals it before he can reconsider.

Flushed with excitement, Felix stands, stretching his cramped fingers. The thought of waiting to deliver the letter is intolerable, but, as he glances out the window at the predawn light, he knows the Post Office in Diagon Alley won't yet be open. The rational voice in his head suggests timidly that he ought to get some sleep, but there's too much adrenaline coursing through him and he's itchy for action. He'll wait in the pub, he decides, have a quick bite to eat and then set off as soon as the hour strikes.

Felix tucks the letter carefully into the pocket of his rumpled robes, and walks with a bounce out of the room and down the cramped and winding stairs.

Felix wasn't overly familiar with the Leaky Cauldron before two days ago. Necessity has forced him to rent a room there while in England. His father, astonishingly tolerant up till now of what he considers Felix's "rebellious dragon phase", has made it clear in his last correspondence that a transfer to the Romanian Reserve is the final straw, and until Felix is willing to return to his family obligations, he will no longer enjoy any Rosier family benefits. Namely money and a place to live. Since Felix has expected this since he first introduced his chosen profession to his parents, he's only moderately hurt.

This is the second morning Felix has spent in the inn and pub, but he’s learned he enjoys its sleepy silence as the regulars engross themselves in their papers before ingesting enough food and news to begin chatting with their neighbors. It makes for a pleasant start to the day, and Felix pushes open the door looking forward to a quiet breakfast before he completes his life-changing post.

Instead, a low thrum of excited muttering fills the room, emanating from the fireplace where nearly all the pub’s early-morning patrons, and even its proprietor, have congregated. Tom has not yet bothered to set down all the chairs from their night-time perches on the tables. He's standing just behind a witch in lime-green robes who seems to be the center of the whispering crowd.

Felix seats himself on a stool at the bar, casting surreptitious glances over at the furtive group, trying to catch snippets of their conversation. But they insist on speaking in hushed tones, as if their subject is too dangerous to be discussed at a normal volume. Felix finally catches the eye of the barman, who breaks reluctantly away and trots over.

"You'll be wanting breakfast, then, sir?" Tom asks, his voice friendly, though he continues to shoot longing looks behind him. "It was coffee you took, in't that right?"

"Yes, thank you," replies Felix distractedly. "Is everything alright?" He looks pointedly at the fireplace and Tom's eyes light up with the thrill of the gossip.

"Oh, I'm afraid not," says the barman with enthusiasm. "There was another attack up at Hogwarts school last night!"

All Felix's animated energy freezes in an instant, leaving his limbs stiff and his hand quite unable to lift the cup Tom sets in front of him.

"You mean... someone else was petrified? I thought that was all over."

Tom shakes his head happily. "Not petrified no. Apparently, the student was brought to St Mungo’s. The school professors weren't sure what happened, but they’re trying to keep it awful quiet. Winn," he jerks his chin over at the witch in green robes. "Was on duty and just happened to see them bring her in."

"'Her'?" Felix asks, his throat so dry it comes out a croak. There's hundreds of students at Hogwarts, he reassures his racing heart, there's no reason for it to be -

"The Windsong girl. You know - the Cursebreaker? Her brother's that one expelled some years back, you might remember him - Master Rosier?"

Felix vacates his stool and stumbles over to the fireplace where the witch in lime-green robes continues to murmur under her breath to her captive audience.

"Excuse me," he somehow manages to say.

The witches and wizards around the fire all look up at him.

"Did you...did you say you saw a Hogwarts student brought into St Mungo’s last night?"

The witch called Winn nods vigorously. "Not just any Hogwarts student! Jacob Windsong's sister! The one what's been opening all them cursed vaults up at the school the last few years!" Her voice is subdued but shaking with excitement. She shuffles her chair around to face Felix, clearly pleased for an excuse to retell her story.

"Brought her in on my shift, they did. Thought she were dead! Pale as a corpse - like there weren't no blood left in her - but twitching, like. The way I used to see 'em back when..." She clears her throat and her eyes dart about as if searching for hidden spies, before she continues even lower than before, "Back when You-Know-Who's followers were torturing people left and right. You'd see 'em twitch like that when they'd had the Cruciatus Curse used on 'em too long."

One of the wizards by the fire shakes his head and says something about the mad goings-on of teenagers these days, but Felix isn’t listening. He’s already moving away, lurching between tables and knocking into chairs as if drunk. Ignoring the pub patrons' affronted looks and Tom still calling to him from the bar, he trips out the front door and apparates as soon as his feet hit the pavement.

Felix hasn't been to St Mungo’s since he was a child, and his current visit does nothing to improve his ill-feeling about the place. The lobby is packed, which seems strange to him for so early in the morning. The seats are full of witches and wizards tapping their feet and sighing with poorly-hidden impatience. Healers in lime-green robes walk swiftly to and fro, all headed in different directions, and the queue for the help desk is a dozen people long. There's a sign above it informing those who can read which types of maladies belong to each floor of the hospital. But, Felix realises, since he doesn't know exactly what's happened to Juniper, he has no idea where she might be.

Blood pumps thickly in his head, making the sounds in the lobby seem oddly muffled as though he's underwater. Felix walks briskly to the information desk and brings his hand down harder than intended on top of the counter. The smacking sound has no visible effect on the bored-looking help witch beyond a quick flick of her eyes away from the hiccoughing wizard in the queue and toward Felix.

"I'm looking for Juniper Windsong," he says, his voice shaking with some emotion he doesn't have time to identify.

"Excuse me, sir,” the help-witch drawls tonelessly. "But if you have a question you'll need to queue up like everyone else."

She gives a barely perceptible jerk of her chin at the line of people now glaring at Felix. One woman's entire face is a vivid shade of pink, and a small child standing with his mother seems to have steam emitting from his nostrils. But none of them appear in any immediate danger to Felix, and he turns back to the help-witch belligerently.

"This cannot wait. Juniper Windsong. She was brought in last night."

The help-witch blinks dubiously at him, but something in Felix's voice or face seems to convince the girl her life will be easier the sooner she gets rid of him. She drags a clipboard across the desk toward her with two fingers and glances down at it.

"I don't have anyone by that name here," she announces, her tone still bored but a slight curl at the edge of her mouth.

"Yes, you do! You must!" he insists, now almost shouting. Because if she's not here, then that means....

"Mr Rosier."

A cold, quiet, and all too familiar voice stops Felix's rising panic in its tracks. He whips around to find Professor Snape standing by the entrance to a stairwell. "What are you-"

"Professor!" Felix interrupts, abandoning the help desk and hurrying over to Snape.

"Is it true?" he asks, suddenly breathless. "Juniper. Is she-"

Before Felix can finish, Snape grips his elbow tightly and drags him into the stairwell, slamming the door shut behind them. The Potions Master casts his dark eyes around as if making sure they’re alone before answering in a crisp whisper:

"Kindly do not bandy Miss Windsong's name about in front of so many witnesses. It is important that her presence at this hospital be kept entirely secret. Which is why,” his eyes narrow at Felix, “I must ask how you came to know she was here."

"I - she - " Felix tries to breathe normally, but the air catches against his ribs, constricting his chest. "A healer. In the Leaky Cauldron. She...she said she saw her - Juniper - last night. She said, she was attacked. But-"

"How do you know the person speaking was a healer?"

Thrown by the question, Felix casts his mind back for the details of the conversation that he realizes with a lurch was not fifteen minutes ago. It feels more like hours.

"Tom! He said she was a healer. And she had the robes, the same color green that the healers wear."

Snape closes his eyes briefly, nostrils flaring in forceful exhalation. Felix has seen this look on the Potion Master’s face before when dealing with exceptionally dim-witted students, but whether it’s himself or the healer in question with whom Snape is exasperated he doesn’t know, or care.

"Professor, what's happened to Juniper? Is she alright? The healer said she was attacked, but she didn't say...I mean...she wasn't sure..." Every ending Felix can think of to this sentence causes his throat to convulse.

Snape considers before answering, his words tinged with frost. “Miss Windsong is alive for the moment."

A flood of warm relief washes over Felix almost tangibly.

"But," Snape continues. "she has been very gravely..." He pauses, tongue between his teeth, as if choosing his next word carefully."...Wounded."

"Why? What happened? Is it something to do with the Vaults? Is she going to be alright?" Felix asks every question that comes to his mind all in a rush.

Snape says nothing. He scrutinizes Felix closely, and Felix gets that uncomfortable prickle he sometimes feels around his former head of house, as though the professor can see right through him. He averts his gaze, and stares instead at his ink-stained hands.

Snape's voice, still frigid, but not quite as icy as before, breaks the silence.

"Follow me, Mr Rosier."

Snape turns on his heel and ascends the staircase without a backward glance. Felix hastens to follow.

At the fourth floor landing, Snape throws open the door and proceeds into a corridor crowded with harried healers. Felix, who cuts a much less intimidating figure than the Potions Master, has to push through the lime-green crowd forcefully in order to keep up. Snape turns down a side hall, and then another, longer one, until they reach a deserted corridor with a dirty window marking a dead-end. Snape forgoes the doors on either side, stopping instead in front of the window, daylight just peeking through the streaky glass. He taps the pane on the lower right with his wand, and Felix can hear a very soft click, like a lock being turned. The window swings inward, and Snape and Felix step quickly inside.

The room is small, only slightly larger than the Hogwarts Artefact Room, with no windows and no other doors. There's just enough space for a solid looking bed, a rather high bedside table covered in potion bottles on one side if it, and a chair pulled up to the other. Felix can see the outline of legs tucked under a white sheet lying on the bed, but the rest of the occupant is hidden by the bulky figure in the chair, who stands quickly and revolves to face the two intruders.

The man raises his wand directly at Felix, who flinches, though for once it has less to do with the wand itself and more to do with the heavily scarred face of the person holding it.

"Password," the man grunts. Snape does not bother to conceal his eye-roll.

"Dragon Heart-String,” he pronounces with very slight disdain, and the strange looking person lowers his wand a fraction.

All Felix’s attention is caught up in the man's one electric blue eye that swivels eerily over both newcomers, then rolls right back into his head as if checking on the patient in the bed behind him. He's so distracted by this display, Felix doesn't notice the man's other eye inspecting him suspiciously.

"Who is this?" the man asks in a gruff voice. "I thought you were bringing back one of the trainees."

"It seems as though the healers cannot all be trusted,” Snape replies loftily. “One is already blabbing the attack in the pub."

The other man swears under his breath.

"This is...a friend of Windsong's,” Snape continues.

Felix isn't sure, but he thinks there's a slight pause before Snape pronounces the word 'friend', and a careful note to his words. But he's too preoccupied to give this further thought. The shock of the room's strange guardian has worn off enough for Felix's attention to return to the bed. And as the man steps toward Snape, the head on the pillow becomes visible.

If Felix hadn't known it was supposed to be Juniper, he might not have recognised her straight away. She looks like an entirely different person from the vibrant young woman laughing and flirting with him only hours ago. It's as though all the blood has been drained from beneath her skin, leaving her as pale and lifeless as the healer in the pub described. The only part of her with any colour is the uncountable number of angry red cuts decorating her face and the visible portion of her neck and arms. She's so eerily still Felix would be terrified Snape was mistaken about her condition, if it weren't for the slight twitching of her fingers, curled strangely and lying on either side of her.

Bile rises in Felix's throat and he has to swallow hard to keep from being violently ill. He’s known Juniper to be injured many times before; she’s famous for it. He’s seen her battered by Devil's Snare, half-frozen to death by cursed ice, knocked about by a dragon. But his memories of those admittedly deadly injuries all include her face set in grim determination or flushed with success. Felix has never seen her like this. Broken and beaten on a hospital bed.

"What happened to her?" he asks, his voice hoarse.

"Tortured," the man with the strange blue eye replies matter-of-factly. "Cruciatus curse by the tremors. And the cuts are one of R's signature curses.”

"R?" asks Felix vaguely, fumbling for anything that will keep his mind from creating a mental picture of Juniper being tortured.

The man explains irritably as though this should be common knowledge. "R is the organisation after the vaults. They're the ones have been threatening Miss Windsong the last few years."

"But...how could they get to her while she's at school?" questions Felix, his voice rising. "Surely, there's spells and wards set up to protect the students?"

"Of course," Snape responds coolly from behind Felix. "But it's been well-established that the defences surrounding school grounds can be penetrated. One has to be inside the school itself for the Headmaster's greater protections to be of any effect. And Miss Windsong was found outside on the grounds. Do you have any idea why she might have been out there, Mr. Rosier?"

Felix's knees buckle abruptly. He grabs the back of the bedside chair to keep himself from falling to the floor. If his display of weakness elicits any reaction from the other men, Felix doesn't notice. His eyes are shut tight against the emotions threatening to overwhelm him. His voice cracks as he rasps:

"It's my fault."

"Excuse me?" The man with the swiveling blue eye whips around to face Felix again, normal eye narrowed. His wand is still pointed aggressively, and Felix half wishes the man would just curse him.

"I - she - was with me," Felix tries to explain, nausea churning his stomach sickly. The chair is now the only thing keeping him upright.

"You were with her on the grounds?" the man demands, his blue eye now fixed on Felix as well. "What happened? What did you see? Who else was there?"

"There wasn't anyone. There was...it was...just us. "

The weight of the guilt causes something in Felix to snap. He cranes his neck around searching for the eyes of his former head of house, desperate for assurance that this isn't his fault; that Juniper isn't half-dead because of him.

"I told her not to, Professor, I swear! She wouldn't listen, I couldn't stop her! But...everything was normal. There wasn't anything strange or-or suspicious on the grounds. I didn't - I mean, I - I thought..."

Snape wrenches his gaze away from Felix, as if his pleading is something painful to watch. But Felix is beyond embarrassment for the moment.

"Mr. Rosier," Snape responds, still looking decidedly anywhere but at Felix. “I am all too familiar with Miss Windsong's particularly obdurate determination to do whatever she pleases. However, I think we both know you exerted little effort to dissuade her. And it cannot be denied that you are the reason Miss Windsong was out on the grounds alone last night."

Each of Snape’s words cuts deeply into Felix, like a mirror of the wounds decorating Juniper’s arms. All his defensiveness bleeds slowly out of him, and he sags further against the chair.

"If," Snape continues, "you would like to make amends for your foolishness, then perhaps you would be willing to help us now."

"I - Yes! Of course, anything, what-"

"At the moment, Miss Windsong appears to be under an enchantment of some kind. Discovering what exactly happened to her and who attacked her may enable us to wake her. We need to investigate, but we also need to keep a guard over her. It is not unlikely that whoever did this may return when they realize their work is unfinished."

"I'll stay," Felix answers, a semblance of strength returning to his voice. The idea that he'll be allowed to help is entirely unexpected, but a set task goes a long way to reasserting his focus.

The strange-eyed man looks from Felix to Snape, his face, a map of scars and craters, alight with skepticism.

"You sure he's up to it?"

Snape stares hard at Felix until that uncomfortable prickling begins to resurface, but Felix is determined to keep his gaze, to prove he can be trusted.

"I believe so," Snape answers. The other man gives Snape a disparaging look before lowering his wand to his side.

"Fine. If anything happens to her, it'll be on your heads then." He crosses the small room in two long strides and looks back at Felix as he reaches the door.

"You. No one is to enter this room without the password. The healers assigned to her know it, and they're the only ones I trust. Anyone else tries to get in, stun them and call for backup. Do you understand?"

Felix nods in affirmation, not trusting himself to speak.

"Do not take this lightly, boy. Miss Windsong's life may depend on your vigilance."

Felix straightens with as much fortitude as he can muster. He directs his words to the man in front of him, but they’re really a promise to himself.

"I won’t let anything happen to her."

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