#figure out who you are and then do it on purpose

[commandershepardvasfuckit]

Second part to this (direct continuation)

NSFW, minors do not interact

Fem!reader x zandalari troll, fingering, squirting, size kink

“So tired just from that?” Daz’ai’s words were teasing but playful as he watched you wobble and lean on the door for support.

Between having your knees locked the whole time and the thorough job he had done eating you out you were wobbling as if the ship was in a storm instead of docked. You were also in no condition to protest as Daz’ai lifted you up and carried you to the bed where he then carefully laid you down among the pillows.

You watched as he undid his belt, unable to tear your eyes from him actually. It was mesmerizing watching his tattoos catch the sunlight, watching muscles move under taut skin. He moved slowly and with purpose, giving you a sly smile and watching your reaction when he finally stepped out of his pants.

Surprise was not quite the right word, you already had a good idea of what you would be dealing with, but still there must have been a look of shock on your face, which only seemed to make Daz’ai smile more.

“Don’t you worry, I have nothing but time to get you ready. It’s one of my favorite parts” his eyes never leaving your face.

He settled down onto the bed and pulled you close, your back flush against his chest, dwarfed by his size. His knee nudged your thighs apart and you felt him nestle his cock between your legs, rubbing against your still wet folds.

Automatically you angled your hips back, trying to give him a better angle to line up with you, which only made him laugh.

“While I appreciate your enthusiasm, trust me when I say that’s not going to work” the rumbles of his laugh and voice traveled pleasantly down your spine and straight between your legs. “Let me enjoy you like this while you find your legs again”.

Slowly he thrusted between your thighs, the remaining wetness of your cunt let him slide easily. His hand pressed down on to the top of your leg, nudging you squeeze him between them firmly and you happily complied.

Clearly he was in no hurry, lazily thrusting while the hand that was on your leg drifted up and under your shirt. Rough, calloused fingertips gently pinched and rolled one of your nipples and you let out a soft sigh in response.

“Not many humans making their way to Dazar’alor, even with the war over, so what brings you here?” he asked nonchalantly as if he was not currently grinding between your thighs.

Between soft sighs you managed to answer him, “Just needed a change. I went my whole life living in one city, figured it was time to get out in the world”.

Once more his low, rumbling laugh sent pleasant tingles down your spine and left a warmth between your legs, “Now that, that’s something I truly understand” he said.

Tentatively you reached down and ran your fingers along his tip as it poked out from between your plump thighs, feeling the beads of pre cum forming. You pressed his shaft up against your folds and clit more firmly, enjoying the friction as he continued to grind against you.

“And not shy, I like that” he said as he gave your nipple a particularly firm pinch that made you let out a loud moan, “I like people who know what they want”.

You closed your eyes, exhausted from both the long voyage to Dazar’alor and from Daz’ai, though more than happy to let Daz’ai continue with you how he pleased. With how tall he was, your head was only up to the middle of his chest laying like this, making you feel completely enveloped by him as he curled around you. He reached down with his free hand to tilt your face up to look at him, at this angle his tusks got in the way trying to kiss the top of your head, so he settled for just pressing his forehead to the top of your head instead.

It would be a lie to say that you were not at least a little confused by him, he was awfully gentle and affectionate for a hook up.

“So,” you began, “have you been with humans before?”

Another laugh from him pleasantly traveled down your spine from where you were pressed against him, “Many times, I’m actually quite fond of humans, the soft little things you are” he gave the fat of your hip a squeeze with the hand that had been resting on your thigh.

The smirks and giggles from his crew made more since now, an apparent pattern of behavior for him, not that it mattered to you. You had just been curious to see the warship up close, the fact that the captain was handsome and had a things for humans was just a bonus.

“So is this how you usually get someone in bed with you? Invite them to your ship and bring them back to your quarters?” you teased.

“I usually just head to the tavern, find someone interesting, then hope they have a partner who also wants to come along too” he smiled back.

You blushed at his words, figuring it was probably not a joke. He was confident, knew what he liked, and clearly was very experienced, and it was wildly attractive.

Carefully he rolled onto his back and pulled you on top of him, setting you to straddle his hips, and seeing him under you was quite a sight.

Regal would be a good word to describe him. From the little bit you knew of Zandalari culture you knew he was not just handsome to you as a human, but definitely drew attention everywhere he went. He was tall, well muscled with a broad chest and back, and very impressive tusks. You remembered hearing people on the voyage to Dazar’alor giggle over tusk sizes and possible correlations, and well, maybe there was some merit.

A few stands of long white hair had slipped free from where he kept his hair tied up. His tattoos were mesmerizing, the ink shined like gold in the light and you traced your fingers along the lines on his chest. As you touched him he watched you, though you could not meet his gaze, there was something about the glow of his solid colored eyes was just too intense.

“So,” you began, “you have a thing for humans?”

“I do. Is that a problem?” he asked back, his hands on your hips encouraging you to grind against him.

“No, I’m just surprised, I always heard that the Zandalari were pretty insular”.

He snorted, and though it was hard to tell for sure, you were fairly certain he rolled his eyes, “Not insular” he corrected firmly, “We are explorers and keepers of knowledge, we just have our way of life and very few are willing to leave and give it up”.

“Oh” you said softly. His tone was firm, but not annoyed or angry, though it left you feeling like you were a kid back in school being scolded by a teacher for asking a dumb question.

“One of the most important things to us is collecting and preserving knowledge. You cannot build the libraries we have if you refuse to travel and learn about others, and I quite like learning about others, especially hands on”. He moved a large hand up to your breast to gently give you a squeeze and seemingly to make his point.

“And what have you learned about humans?” you asked.

He let out a low hum before speaking, “Humans are cocky, you see a Zandalari and want to start a fight. I’m no fighter, but I’ve sent many cocky humans home with wounded pride.

“And humans come in so many shapes and sizes, unlike Zandalari. My people value strength almost above all else, does not leave a lot of room for different looks, it’s boring. But a human like you? Soft and round, how much better it feels to have soft thighs around my cock, how good those wide hips look bent over, being able to grab on and get a good handful of someone?” his other hand grabbed onto the fat of your hip, “So beautifully different than what I was used to”.

Your face was red hot from the way he spoke, from the way he looked at you with such desire.

“So, my pretty little human, think you’re steady enough now for me to really tire you out?” he asked.

You took a deep breath to steady yourself, still worn out from earlier and now overstimulated from his shaft rubbing your clit the whole time, “All yours” you smiled still.

It was surprising how quickly he could move. Before you knew it he had flipped you onto your back on the bed and was seated between your legs. His hands started at your knees and he took his time gently squeezing and playing with your thighs as he worked his way up, occasionally stopping to kiss the tops of your legs. You marveled at his hands, only two thick fingers and a thumb per hand like all trolls, and you were eager to experience what he could do with them.

Daz’ai slowly dragged one of those thick fingers between your folds and tentatively pressed against your entrance. “You’ll tell me if anything is too much, ok?” it was not a question as much as it was a command.

“Ok” you answered back, already panting in anticipation.

The stretch from his finger was incredible and you squirmed under his careful touch as he began to enter you. He paused periodically, anticipating when it was getting to be too much even before you needed to say anything. Occasionally stopping to rub his finger along your wet heat while he patiently waited for you to adjust.

“By the light you really know what you’re doing” you gasped as he slid his finger in a bit farther.

“I’ve had plenty of practice” he gave you a sly smile.

Expertly and thoroughly he worked you over, sliding his finger almost entirely out before gently working in back in and softly rubbing against your cervix once you were able to handle it. Many time he paused just a few inches in to stroke your most sensitive spots, making you see stars. None of his movements were fast nor particularly intense, instead he was precise, listening to your moans and constantly adjusting what he was doing.

As he settled into a steady pattern and rhythm with you, his free hand moved to your clit. His pressure was light as he started, tentatively varying it until he found what really made you moan. Never once did he falter in his rhythm, nor did he look away from your face.

“Just relax, pretty little thing. You’re still so tense, and haven’t I been so gentle with you?” he cooed.

You closed you eyes, just focusing on how incredible everything felt.

It was hard to tell how old Daz’ai was exactly, all you knew was he was older than you, wildly more experienced than you, and that you were more than happy to let him lead.

You could feel how hard you were clenching around his finger as you got closer. The tension in your core building endlessly from his steady pace, enough to leave you panting but not enough to tip you over the edge.

“Please” you begged him for the second time that day.

“Hmmmm? ‘Please’ what?” he asked back, a teasing tone in his voice.

“More. Please”.

“I was going to drag this out as long as I could, but if you’re going to ask so nicely” he trailed off, pressing another kiss to the top of your leg before making sure you felt every bit of him, his steady pace increasing and making your toes curl.

All you could manage was incoherent babbling, strings of “yes” or “oh fuck” as you felt like every nerve in your body was on fire in the most incredible way. The first waves of your release hit hard, your brain locking up and not being able to make a sound for the first few moments, then came a new feeling. A spray of fluids from you that coated Da’zai chest and the sheets under you.

“I’m so sorry! That’s never happened before” you exclaimed in your embarrassment. “I don’t know what- I didn’t mean to”

Swiftly he cut you off, looking highly amused as you babbled on in a panic, “I have that effect on people. And whatever you think just happened? No”.

“No?”

“No” he repeated, a cocky smile now on his face, “Though, now I know I’m the best you’ve ever had”.

Even without seeing yourself, you knew your face was beet red. He was right. He was the best you have ever had and by a wide margin. You had had plenty of good sex in your life, even great sex at times, but Daz’ai’s idea of foreplay was an entirely different thing.

He dragged himself over to lay on his side next to you, pausing only for a moment to use the corner of the sheet to wipe himself off, “Don’t look so embarrassed, it felt good, right?” he asked.

“Yeah” was all you could manage, your heart threatening to beat out of your chest from your orgasm and your embarrassment.

“It’s normal, not something everyone can do, but my ego does like that I must be the first to get you to squirt” slowly he ran his fingers along your hips and leg, “And that was just a finger, imagine how good it’ll feel riding my cock while I play with your clit and nipples”.

You squirmed as you felt your cunt flutter in response to his words, already feeling more wetness forming at the thought.

“I’m going to have so much fun playing with this pretty, soft body” he cooed at you as he tossed an arm over you and happily kneaded his hand into the fat of your hips.

The way he looked at you made you blush more than his words, the intense desire mixed with a gentleness.

“You look so good like this, feeling so good, so pliable and ready for me. Rest for moment, close your eyes and doze if you need, and then when you’re ready I’m going to make sure you come looking for my ship any time you’re in the city”.

[yandereunsolved]

Yandere Aegon the Conqueror who’s darling is oblivious and therefore he invest in letters and diaries while trying to woe darling by doing ANYTHING but confess

Balerion: *sees Aegon’s letter draft and decides to be nosey and read it*

Aegon’s letter: My dearest, I wish nothing more than to hold you in my hands, to have you scream my name as my cock plunge into you. *proceeds to detail the most raunchiest, thirstiest thing ever*

Balerion: *clutch pearls*😟😟 and next time he sees darling he’s like “blink twice if you need help”.

Yandere Visenya is probably the same. I know Vhagar and Balerion gossiping like

Vhagar: We were flying over his house at 5 AM. WHY? Because she wanted to see if he had maiden😒

Balerion: They will do ANYTHING but confess😒 one time I read Aegon’s letter and clutched my pearl😒 but do you think he’ll confess? No.

Vhagar: Don’t Forget them venting and crying and over the silliest thing too

Balerion: He once fell to his knees and cried…WHY? Because she didn’t dance with him at the feast😒 sir she was dancing with her BETROTHED. Betrothed cancelled the marriage the next day too😒 poor miss has NO IDEA and think he’s being nice not knowing that this man spends his day stalking and dreaming

Yandere Aegon is writing headcanons about his darling and hope they become canon. Let's be honest with ourselves.

He has detailed works in novel length about how much he wants to impregnate his darling. Doesn't matter if they are a dude. It's happening.

He's figured it out! The calculations are in his 'equations about darling' journal.

He has a multitude of journals all with different purposes. 'Darling's emotions' 'Darling's likes' 'Darling's risqué fantasies' etc...

He has you down to fine point.

The dragons are all just like "who is going to tell them their personal freedom is in danger?" "they can't understand us." "we could just growl at them and scare them off."

they are all like "no. that's a stupid idea. we need them to like us. they'll need our help after all."

[akutasoda]

"i found my heart, i found your heart, and it's still beating"

--you two were denser than rocks, is what dan feng thought. and now looking back on all those years you realise just what could've been, but it's too late now...

--warnings - gn!longlife species reader, fluff, pining, angst no comfort, mention of death??, two people that can't see the signs, maybe ooc, wc - 2.4k

--a/n: wowee yingixing fic! tbh i spent alot of time on r/blacksmiths when writing HAHA shouts to @milksnake-tea for the idea behind this which then inspired the whole thing... and here you go pookies @lowkeyren + @https-sourlimes i hope i did the wife proud!!

the natural heat of the day was nearly unbearable.

nearly as it paled in comparison to the blazing warmth that crept out the furnace and filled the air of the small workshop - although by now the lone figure was well used to the conditions forced upon him when forging.

he had a quota to reach. many weapons began their life being forged within these walls by his hands and died upon battlefields. most of his creations never lasted, all the time and toil spent making them just for them to be destroyed in the hands of those either lucky enough to make it back, or unlucky enough to not.

but a quota was a quota - more casualties would only be caused if he failed. a sigh escaped him as he picked up the last sword before moving towards the stifling heat of the forge and holding the sword in, patiently waiting for it to turn a glowing yellow and then removing it.

sitting down and setting down the stock flat on the anvil, he began carefully shaping the top of the soon to be sword. he stopped for a moment, the sound of approaching footsteps caught his attention and a part of him could guess just who was visiting him now.

wiping away the sweat from his forehead with the back of his leather gloves, he watched as you walked through the open door - it was never closed when the forge was going, the room would've turned itself into the forge otherwise. and with that he knew his time was up.

“done with the weapons yet?” your voice called out but he simply turned to flatten the blade, a smirk made it's way across your face “the marshall needs them by the deadline set you know?”

yingxing grumbled “as usual” speaking up to add “if they want them done quicker perhaps they could forge them themselves then?”

he stood up and held the sword into the forge again, holding it for less time than previously. clearly he wasn't in a rush so you prompted “how long then?”

“depends, if the marshall wants a decent weapon i still need to sand, sharpen, reheat and create the hilt” pausing before pulling the sword away from the forge and pointing it at you “or you could take it now”

his arrogance would be the death of you, but for now a smile graced your face before urging him to continue on - the marshall could wait a while longer.

unlike yingxing, you weren't accustomed to the conditions of the forgery and so the suffocating environment forced you to find respite outside until he was finished. if anything this was a usual routine between the two of you nowadays, the marshall would send you to collect weapons from yingxing but everytime he wouldn't be completely finished and so you'd wait outside.

occasionally you sat with him but the sweltering heat made it feel like the whole room would suffocate you and he often preferred to work in silence. he never took that long anyway, or if he did it was purposeful and you both knew so - at least the scenery was nice.

“it’s finished now, don't keep the marshall waiting longer or else we’ll both hear about it” his voice snapped you out of a daze, you turned to watch him sit beside you “fresh air feels nice”

“it's your choice to hold yourself up in that forgery for hours” pausing, you looked at him before turning back and scrunching your nose “least you could do is leave that smell in there”

he held back a small laugh “not my problem, now are you going to deliver the weapons or not, i've done my part”

sighing, you stood up and yingxing followed suit before leading you back into the forgery and handing over the weapons.

---✩

“your late”

yingxing fought the urge to roll his eyes “it's nice to see you too dan feng”

the high elder shot him a glance that landed somewhere between annoyed and somewhat relieved.

despite being the only short life species among the high cloud quintet, the furnace master was just as a part of the group as the rest - if anything, one of the most important as he was responsible for hand crafting each and every one of their weapons.

“im earlier than the rest, your too punctual for your own good” he sighed

dan feng scoffed “it’s more likely that the rest of you aren't”

yingxing wanted to comment on how it wasn't an important meetup, if anything it was a friendly hangout but unfortunately arguing with dan feng was a futile task that only got more depressing for him as he went on.

fortunately or unfortunately, depending on how he looked at it, they were still a group yingxing held dear. some of his closest companions to which he even looked up to. so even now, the silence was comfortable. the high elder was a comforting presence as despite his initial arrogance, he carried a deep seated care reserved to those he deemed important.

yingxing caught the way dan feng looked over to him occasionally, like he had something to say. eventually the silence was broken by the furnace master asking what was on dan fengs mind.

“have they realised yet?” was his response, it sounded rather uncharacteristic for the high elder.

but yingxing knew he was referring to you. ages ago he had consulted baiheng about the warm fuzzy feelings he felt around you and the foxian was practically beaming as she told him that he had a crush. although she didn't exactly know how to keep a secret and very quickly the entire quintet knew of his apparent “crush”.

baiheng was normally the one to bring it up so he never really expected dan feng to - the foxian was always very eager to be updated on the situation between the two of you. although a very prominent issue soon became apparent. you were quite dense toward the furnace master's advances.

“same as last time i'm afraid” he sighed, every single one of his advances had gone straight over your head. and every single time he reported back to baiheng who became even more puzzled about how to help him finally get round to you.

the high elder hummed “try being more direct then” out of all people, yingxing never expected to get relationship advice from dan feng. it was practically shocking. be more direct. was it really that simple?

---✩

unfortunately, being direct was more of an issue than either of them thought.

no matter how much yingxing tried to subtly hint to you, it always became lost in translation. even his more direct approaches were interpreted as friendly gestures or simple acts of kindness - he couldn't even get frustrated because a part of him thought it was cute.

every day baiheng would find yingxing sitting defeated in the forgery, his head in his hands as he tried to decipher exactly what he could've done better to finally get through to you. she'd always have to console him and convince the deflated furnace master that he could always try again.

no amount of gifts, kind words or actions that couldn't be mistaken as simple friendly gestures, could convince you. every time you found some way to see it as friendly and not a romantic advance on yingxing's part. not even the handmade trinket he made you that suspiciously matched his hairpin could convince you.

baiheng, and occasionally dan heng or jing yuan, would always tell him that he still had time - jingliu never really liked to get involved. they'd always tell him that there would be some way to get you to acknowledge his feelings. he believed them.

one day, perhaps he could build up the confidence to confess directly. to stop beating around the subject and come clean. clearly subtle advances weren't going to do the trick, but yingxing had the time to build up that confidence.

---✩

but yingxing had less time than he thought.

it was jing yuan that broke the news to you.

the grief was almost instant. a deep rooted part of yourself was convinced it was some cruel joke, an insensitive prank that he was put up to - but you knew better. the realistic, logical part of yourself was well aware of the truth but it was suppressed by the emotional side. the part of yourself that wanted to scream and curse the aeons, the arbiter, yourself, anyone that could've prevented it.

jing yuan hated to be the one to tell you. but no-one else would. he was hurting as well, having watched all his friends fall into despair, ruin and death. admittedly, he probably wasn't supposed to tell you but since he knew how close you and yingxing were, he reckoned you could be an exception.

it hurt jing yuan even more to leave you almost immediately after breaking the news to you. he could see how distraught you were but he was in no position to offer you comfort. although honestly, you preferred to be left alone.

you needed to process the passing of yingxing. well he wasn't dead, but jing yuan had told you how he was banished from the luofu - he was a short life species unlike yourself so you had to come to terms with the fact that you probably were never seeing him again. yingxing would die and you wouldn't ever see him again.

it hurt. it was as if the aeons themselves had plucked your heart from your chest and pierced it in front of you. that night, you cried. harder than you ever had in your life, clutching the handmade trinket that he made you.

---✩

it was hard to miss the news, the previous high elder returning to the luofu, stellaron hunters aboard - one or the other would lead to both being mentioned anyway. a scoff was all that left your mouth when you first heard, the previous high elder was dead. forced to reincarnate, the chances of his reincarnation willingly coming back was low.

the stellaron hunters didn't alarm you either, sure they were wanted criminals but confidence could be placed in the cloud knights and even the general himself. although it became apparent that it was the stellaron hunter you had to worry about.

yet again, it was jing yuan that told you. he was hesitant for many reasons. one reason was the fact that even though you both resided on the luofu, you barely spoke with him ever since the incident - he didn't exactly hope that your first time talking with him in ages was to tell you that yingxing’s new self was aboard the luofu, and a wanted criminal at that - and admittedly he hadn't told you the whole truth all those years ago.

another reason was that he wanted to protect you. jing yuan knew you would've heard about imbibitor lunaes return and the steallron hunters but he didn't trust blade.

he wasn't yingxing. the yingxing that constantly tried to hit on your dense self, that gifted you handmade trinkets often, that made you laugh. no. it was a stellaron hunter known as blade occupying yingxing's mara stricken body.

but you deserved to know. to at least be aware of the situation and so, begrudgingly, jing yuan informed you. what he hadn't anticipated was for you to immediately rush off in search of your supposed yingxing.

it didn't surprise you to find "him".

that wasn't yingxing, the “furnace master” that made you laugh, made you feel warm and safe. no, this was an abomination. someone who had taken the man known as yingxing and ruined him, taken him to the brink of death over and over just to come back with more scars that never healed, piling on again and again until he wasn't the same.

all that was left was bitter malice seeping into the parts that slowly ebbed away, slowly removing any semblance that could link “blade” to yingxing. would it be fair to even call him a human?

the only thing that could even link that monster to your friend was his attire. it was tattered and worn, nothing like how yingixing would've worn it - although rather admittedly his outfit was never “clean”, constantly dirtied by the consequences of forging weapons but he tried his best.

he finally noticed you, and as you locked eyes, it felt like staring into the eyes of a stranger. it was as if the mara had risen from the hands of abundance itself and ate away at the one memory left alive until nothing could be linked back. it forced it's way into his brain, stripping him of what little semblance of sanity remained upon seeing you.

the mara forced his hand, the one he desperately tried to hold back but it was as if his body was no longer his. you weren't from his memories but some part of him could recognise you.

blade knew you weren't his, you weren't even yingixing's but he longed to hold you in his arms. to be selfish and have what his previous identity couldn't.

it was a futile effort. his mara forced him to attack, in his eyes you were no longer an innocent bystander - you were a threat. to anyone else, they would say that blade held nothing but hatred behind his gaze. pure rage and despise. but to you, you could pick up on relief.

some deep rooted part of yingxing that hadn't been lost to the mara that encompassed blade recognised you. affection and longing could be found in his gaze, fighting to break through to the last conscious part of blade's brain. it was an impossible chance. so instead he hurts.

damaging the parts of you that a previous identity would've died to caress and kiss. no longer could you sit and wonder about what could've been. yingxing was gone. this man was simply a monster accumulated from the parts of him.

rest of the "series"

taglist - @little-miss-chaoss, @frankiesteinn

[nino-rox]

KEEHO x Male Bottom Reader | S

Content Warning : NSFW Gay Smut, sexual themes, Top Keeho and Bottom Male Reader, unprotected sex (please use protection)

Disclaimer : This is a Fan-fiction story written for entertainment purposes only, no part of the story implies or affirms anything regarding real world events or individuals. Please be of the appropriate age ( i.e, Adult as per your country’s stipulations and regulations) before interacting with this post

(NOT PROOF READ)

My eyes were still tired, even though the sun was beaming through the blinds. I had the worst headache ever and felt so sick, as if I were in a hangover.

I groaned, turning on my side to grab a pillow, an action that unexpectedly hurt. My whole body ached. I slowly opened my eyes, looking over to the window, I squinted my eyes, as I felt an arm drape over my side.

What?

I looked over and saw an unfamiliar figure lying in bed beside me.

A man?

I blinked.

This has to be a dream.

I rubbed my eyes and turned around, the pain from my bottom made me gasp.

My stomach dropped, I didn't have a single clue what happened last night. I remembered going to a frat party with a couple of friends and then...

Oh god.

I had sex with him, didn't I?

The realization came to me like a wave.

How much did I drink last night?

I had a feeling I would never remember.

I was naked, the other man was also naked, and he was so close to me that I could smell his sweet scent. We were both now laying facing each other as he slept soundly.

He looked peaceful, and honestly, he was kind of crazy hot, but I had no idea who this was or why he was in my bed.

I tried to wake him up but was too scared to shake him.

I slowly removed his arm from me and got out of bed. I looked down and winced at the pain, my thighs were covered in purple and blue hickies and my bottom had the same coloring, only, they were bigger and redder.

I sighed and turned around to find my phone. It was on the nightstand. I went to grab it but accidentally bumped into the table, causing the lamp to fall off and the other man to jump awake.

I yelped, and we both froze, staring at each other.

I felt the blood rush to my cheeks as I realized that he had a morning wood.

The man sat up, the blanket falling off his body and landing on floor.

We continued to stare at each other, unable to move or say anything.

"How was your night sexy?" He finally asked.

I hesitated, "Oh, uhm...,” his very visible hard on wasn’t helping. I didn’t know what to say or what to do.

The other man chuckled, "Don't tell me you don't remember. You were pretty drunk last night.

"Did we-"

"Fuck? Yeah, you were quite loud. I don't think your neighbors will be very happy about it."

I didn't know what to say.

"Do you not remember?"

I shook my head, "No."

"Damn, I wanted you to remember," the other man sighed, "well, since we both woke up like this, why don't we help each other out? Help you remember,” he said smirking, "come back to bed."

"Wait-"

But before I could finish, the other man grabbed my hand and pulled me back into bed.

I gasped as he kissed me, his lips were so soft, and the feeling of his warm tongue exploring my mouth sent shivers down my spine.

He pinned me down and I could feel his morning wood rub against me.

He smirked at my reaction, "you’re so hard, you want more, huh? Then let's have some more fun," he whispered, and started kissing my neck. As if instinctively, I tilted my head, and the man started biting and licking the spot where he did last night, making me moan.

"You liked it here right?" he mumbled, "I could tell by how loud you were screaming."

I moaned as he continued kissing and biting my neck, his arm snaking its way to my cock as the other grabbed my hair, pulling it and exposing my neck even more.

My body just gave in, getting turned on by the other man and letting him do whatever he wanted, as my arms wrapped around his neck.

He started stroking my dick as he rubbed his own against me.

"Mmm," he moaned, "I want to fuck you, lets go for round 2 baby? Huh?" he said as he bit my ear, "let me hear you say it."

I moaned, "yes, fuck me please."

He smiled, "that's what I like to hear," and kissed me. He let go of my dick and inserted his fingers into my mouth, "suck."

I looked at him but obeyed, and he continued stroking himself with his other hand.

I sucked his fingers and he removed them from my mouth and placed one of them at my hole.

He looked up at me and grinned, "ready?"

I nodded and he inserted one finger, and another.

I moaned as he scissored his fingers, stretching me, and began stroking his own cock. “Fuck baby you’re still loose from last night. You ready to take me now? Huh?"

I could only nod, my mind was in a daze.

"Then come milk me baby, you did such a good job last night, and now, I want to see you do it again."

I couldn't believe that this was happening. I didn't even know the man's name, yet, I was already moaning beneath him, waiting to take his cock.

He lined his cock at my hole and slowly slid in, and I groaned at the sensation.

He thrusted into me and we both moaned. He continued thrusting and I moved my hips, matching his rhythm.

"Fuck," he groaned, "you feel so fucking good."

He lifted my legs and put them on his shoulders, his cock hitting a different angle, and I couldn't help but scream, "oh fuck, oh fuck, don't stop, don't stop, mmm fuck,"

"I won't stop," the other man moaned, "but tell me your name."

I whimpered, "Y/N, and yours?"

"Keeho," he said, his thrusts becoming faster and deeper, "you like that ? Want me yo go faster Y/N?."

I moaned, "Ah AH, oh god, yes."

He grinned, "such a naughty boy."

He pulled out, making me whine, but then flipped me around and entered me again, and I screamed.

He gripped my hips, his thrusts becoming more aggressive, his skin slapping against mine, as he grunted.

I could feel myself cumming, "oh fuck Keeho, I'm gonna-"

"Not yet," he growled, and he slowed his pace, and started rubbing my nipples.

I moaned, as he bit my ear, "you gonna be good for me?,” he said as he groaned into my ear, and started pinching and pulling my nipples.

I could only whimper.

"Answer me."

"Yes."

"You want to cum?"

"Yes."

"Want me to fill you up?"

"Please."

"I'm almost there baby, but not yet."

Keeho continued thrusting slowly, making sure that the head of his cock hit my prostate with every thrust, and his fingers played with my nipples.

My body was on fire, his rod stretching you out, as it went in and out, his hot breath on my neck, and the way he was teasing my nipples were driving me crazy.

I couldn't take it anymore, "Keeho, I-,"

"Now," he moaned.

His hands left my nipples and he gripped my waist, his cock sliding out, and then entering, and he continued to fuck me hard, making me scream.

"Y/N, fuck," Keeho moaned.

I could feel him cum inside me, as I orgasmed.

I fell on the bed and he collapsed on top of me, breathing heavily.

"You are so sexy," he said, his voice still husky, "I could fuck you again."

“Let’s.”

Keeho kissed me, and we laid in bed, holding each other.

He smiled, his eyes sparkling, "I want to see you again," he whispered, his fingers tracing my chest, "would you be interested in seeing me again?"

[gayregina]

I might be stupid for figuring it out just now but hear me out:

“No one has painted me in fourth hundred years”. With the general context it would make sense Armand would mention it, give Louis a part of his history perhaps in an attempt to detach from it, that is. The painting had been concrete evidence of who he was and Louis couldn’t easily discard it. Yet again Armand is being of service by giving Louis the answer to his question: “Who are you?” However, the line first line I mentioned coming right after “Who am I, Louis…. I do not know anymore” has just become more interesting to me, mainly because it reveals a crucial part of Armand’s character. Despite the fairly obvious fact that Armand is communicating here, that he hasn’t been around his maker and the human/innocent version of himself for centuries in order to be painted again, the statement is also a matter of perception. No one had painted him in so long, no one had shown him their versions of himself in so long that he could no longer be what others wanted him to because he simply didn’t know what that was. All Armand has done in his life is serve someone or a purpose that someone has presented to him so he never actually figured out who he was. He just wanted to be the object of admiration for others, he just wanted to be loved so badly that he would do anything, be anyone. They gave him the role of a ruthless coven leader, he became one. Louis wanted a cunning and gentle companion as not to think of Lestat and his chaos, he played the part. He embodied the roles until he could no longer survive outside of them, almost like a defence mechanism. He couldn’t possibly drop the facade, if his life depended on it, because he couldn’t stay with himself when he was just a stranger. He didn’t like the unknown, he couldn’t handle the lack of familiarity, of control.

[essentialthyme]

I've heard about the sheer number of excellent fanfic that has been written by hockey RPF authors before, but I never gave it much thought. Surely, it wasn't that much different from every other RPF folks out there. Right? But I started seeing posts about male hockey players all over my dash, but there's no way I willingly followed someone who regularly posts about men, I'm too sapphic focused, so I checked and these posts are all blazed?? I can't figure out why anyone would blaze these, but at least it answered my question. But then!! I find fics from two of my favorite ships: hockey AUs, which I might as well read, so I do, and what do I find? Some of the most well crafted fics I ever had the pleasure of reading, I'm????????? The authors clearly have knowledge that runs deeper than any research could provide, only acquireable through years of living that shit, and I'm frothing at the mouth wishing one of the fics gets updated, and thinking about when I'm finally getting to my reading time today so I can continue the one that is complete.

Just... who ARE you people?? From which well have you drank? For what purpose do you blaze thy men? Why do you randomly bless lesbian ships with the gift of an incredible fic? Are these questions best left unanswered? Must I thread through life's river baring only the knowledge that I have gazed upon the unknowable and will never again know peace?

[thezombieprostitute]

The sheriff likes how you always got a pie baking in your window. He likes that every time he sees you, you got your apron on. He likes that you smile and wave at his cruiser. He likes all the way you make him shift in his seat.

The only thing he doesn't like, is that you're not waiting at home for him.

Summary: Lee has regrets to deal with and decisions to make.

Warnings: Alcohol consumption, Depression, Thoughts of cheating, Unhappy marriage. Please let me know if I missed any!

Lee's made a lot of decisions in his life that he regrets. He'll swear up and down that he had only the best of intentions when he signed up for the police force. When he decided to become sheriff. But no one knows better than him how far his morals have fallen.

But not being your man was the biggest regret of his life.

To become sheriff, he needed financial and social support. The kind he could get from her family. He courted her, got on her father's good side, eventually marrying her. He honestly thought that's all love was, that that was the purpose of a marriage. Now he's got all the resources he needs to keep his position, barring his sister royally fucking things up for him.

But then he met you.

Him and his little family were making an appearance at the local auction to raise money for the church. People brought a bunch of homemade goods and foods. Sometimes it was simply pine cone crafts that really did look pretty. Other times it was Granny Russell's special chicken livers. Lee always thought only an idiot would turn down that specialty.

But then you showed up, with a stack of pies.

You were something to look at, Lee was sure no one could deny that. But you were also so sweet. He was certain your kindness, patience, couldn't be real. No one was that sweet all the time. You were too new to the town for him to really know well, but given how the people who did know you reacted, he could imagine you were worth knowing. He made sure to buy one of the pies you'd brought, intent to use it as an ice breaker. He'd figure out your angle, how you could play so nice.

But when he looked into your eyes, he was a goner.

He's never seen such beautiful, kind eyes. He swears they were sparkling. For the first time in his life, Lee was tongue-tied. His wife had to subtly elbow him in the ribs to stop his staring. He definitely got an earful that night before sleeping on the couch. The entire time you were talking to his wife, his kids, he felt at a loss. Like there was something more to life than status. His wife set him straight, though.

But he kept seeing you around town and the feelings kept coming back.

You were always busy with your baking. Always kind to everyone. Always waving at him and smiling. He feels in his bones that you should be his. That you could give him the actual warmth that storybooks about love had promised. Not the performative care that he and his wife did for each other. You'd genuinely enjoy spending time with him, with the kids. Not complaining about a "life wasted" like his wife.

But cheating or worse, a divorce, would kill his election odds.

Every day he can't be with you hurts him. He takes up drinking to try to ease his misery until his wife dumps all of his bottles, citing the upcoming election. The people aren't gonna vote for an angry drunk. Lee thanks her, honestly thanks her, and it catches her off guard. If he can't have you, he's gonna try to do better by his own wife. Maybe it'll help ease the pain of not having you and your natural sweetness in his life.

But then Hal Carter comes to town.

He's a tramp, everyone knows it. He's a drifter working in different towns as he tries getting to some friends of his further south. He claims to have a college degree but Lee doesn't want to believe it. Hal is young, strong and, according to all the old ladies at the church, very helpful. Everything Lee is not. Hal hasn't stopped showering you with attention, attention Lee knows you deserve.

But it should be Lee making you happy.

Holy wah, that got away from me! This was not supposed to go on so long!

Tagging: @alicedopey; @delicatebarness; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @ronearoundblindly

[sugarverse]

vampire!girlfriend who is freezing to the touch, always shoving her hands under your shirt to ‘warm her hands up’. she'll faintly scratch your skin with long, manicured nails, hugging you close and listening to the beat of your heart as you talk about your day.

vampire!gf who asks you if her lipgloss/mascara is pretty or if it looks sloppy considering she can’t herself. trusting you’ll be truthful, letting you help her fix a part in her hair or adjust a ponytail to make the other. she couldn’t see her reflection in the mirror, but she could in her phone! although she'll still fake a need for help when she needs your attention.

vampire!gf who sleeps ALL day, trying to change her sleep schedule over to yours but always falling asleep cuddled next to you or in the amazing smell of your cologne in your bed. very few times has she been able to stay up until about 1pm with you. she woke up around 4 or 5pm on a regular basis. 

vampire!gf who finds dinner places for the two of you, wanting to always share at least two meals together every week. it was difficult, being nocturnal and wanted to talk to someone who was always asleep. she hated to make you stay up, but when you did? she made sure to spend every moment of it by your side.

vampire!gf who still eats garlic bread even though it makes her feel like a zombie, making you carry her around as she holds her stomach and whines “I just wanted a piece of breaaaad :(“

vampire!gf who calls you on facetime and tells you all about her night, sending cool pictures of the neon lights in the late city. watching you fall asleep and visiting a few 24 hour stores here and there that she frequented for food or fun trinkets with you in her pocket. she always finds little snacks or mini figures to leave around your place with little notes like “I love you honey!” or “u can do this!” 

vampire!gf who always stares at you with these siren eyes, often to turn you on just to smirk and claim it isn't on purpose but “I'll help you out anyway, since you think i'm so pretty.” dropping to her knees and pulling you out of your boxers eagerly. staring with eyes full of greed and lust.

vampire!gf who opens her mouth the way snakes do, being careful of her fangs before sliding you down her throat. eyes still staring up at you as she took you down her throat fully a few times. messy and slow, swirling her tongue around you. she takes your hand and places it on the back of her head to feel the way you gripped onto her roots, speeding up. she whined, using her hand to make up with what was 'too much.'

vampire!gf who teasingly sucks on your tip, drawing little hearts with her tongue. she craved you so much, batting pretty lashes up at you before feeling you shove her head to take you completely. sloppy, wet, gags came from her throat as you drug her along your cock. her eyes pricking with tears, nails tapped against your thighs happily. she bobbed her head back and forth even quicker when you say you'll finish in her mouth. 

vampire!gf who swallow happily, sitting on your shared bed and slowly pulling up her black skirt. you didn't forget she needed help too, right? her pretty burgundy nails tugging her panties to the side, pouting slightly. “you made my panties all wet..” she smirks as you climb on top of her, aligning yourself up to her. she wraps her legs around your waist to pull you closer once you're finally in, wrapping herself around you happily.

vampire!gf whos sweet moans ring in your ears, clawing at your back so deeply it draws blood. she laughs, licking off her nails and whining in your ear. “s-s-sooo..good-! ahh!~” she feels you flinch, bouncing her hips against yours to distract you from the pain of her nails. she leaves kisses all over your shoulders and neck with all of the appreciation she has for you. 

vampire!gf who always wraps her legs around you before you cum, mumbling very convincing words in your ear to “just put a baby in me already, please?” she squeals in happiness when you nod, holding your face and kissing you as if it's the last kiss she can ever give. vampire!gf who cleans you off, seeing blood still drip from your back and not resisting a few licks before kissing over the horrible marks. she laughs when you notice and kisses the nape of your neck. “if you'd let me bite you, wouldn't hurt so bad.” her long nails scratching at your scalp and kissing your cheek. “you could be with me forever ya knowwww..”

[the-upside-down-umbrella]

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

Part 3

Five Hargreeves x Fem!Reader

(Booth Five)

Summary: After finding out about the seven years Lila and Five spent together, reader walks in to a diner in between all time and space and finds exactly what she didn’t know she was looking for

Warnings: Some cursing, angst

A/N: They’re may be some major grammar errors because I’ve had a massive migraine for several days now but I wanted to get it out as soon as possible ❤️ I hope it’s up to expectations. I had so much fun writing it. This is the last part and then there will be a short epilogue!

Also, Five is still very much alive and dealing with the consequences of his choices. Everything else is left up to interpretation

————

“Come on, there’s someone you need to meet,” Y/N said, holding her hand out for Five to take, “Blink us to the subway.”

“Y/N, what are you-“

“My God, Five, for once in your life would you just do as your told,” she snapped, frustration bleeding from every word, “Blink us to the subway!”

He looked taken aback for a moment before he finally relented, taking her hand and blinking them to the terminal.

She immediately started in the direction she knew the Deli would be in. Five followed her, more than a little confused by her behavior.

He trailed behind her down the stairs but stepped back in surprise when the marquis lights of the deli came in to view.

His steps faltered and he knitted his eyebrows together in confusion, “Max?”

“Max,” she confirmed, “You are, in fact, seeing your name. Come on.”

He followed behind her cautiously but she did not hesitate to open the door of the deli, stepping in like she was a frequent patron of this place in the middle of all of time.

Five instinctively put a hand on the small of her back, ready to protect her if necessary but she inched away from him. She acted like his touch was the equivalent to an white-hot, iron poker. She was also incredibly too comfortable in this new environment.

And he realized why as soon as he was over the threshold. It was like looking in to a shattered mirror. He saw himself all around the room, in various positions as both patron and employees of Max’s deli.

A Five in the middle of the room stood up as soon as he noticed them, a look of sheer surprise on his face. Y/N strolled forward without hesitation and met him half-way. This Five, this him, held out his arms towards her and she fell in to them, welcoming his embrace. All the while his eyes glared over her head, straight in to Five’s skull. If looks could kill.

“What are you doing here?”

“We need your help.” She explained, “Things are going south topside and I figured when it comes to apocalypses, the more Fives, the merrier.”

“I’m sorry, does someone want to explain to me what the actual fuck is going on?” Five interrupted them.

Booth Five bared his teeth, “What’s going on, asshole, is that you left her down here on her own after you fucked-.”

“Hey, no!” Y/N put a hand on his chest to urge him to stop talking, “Come sit down, Five, and we’ll explain.”

She gestured to Booth’s usual table.

“You’re giving him far too much Grace, darling,” Booth growled in her ear as she slid in to the seat beside him, completely ignoring her Five’s pleading eyes as he realized that she was not going to take take the place next to him.

Y/N placed a gentle hand on Booth’s thigh under the table, giving it a soft squeeze in attempt to keep him calm. She didn’t need them going after each other before she even got the first word out.

Booth took that as his cue to move closer to her, closing the small space between them, purposely brushing his thigh against hers. She ignored him, but couldn’t help the goose-bumps that erupted across her skin at his close proximity. It was crazy what reactions he could bring out of her, even with her timeline’s version of him sitting across from them.

Five eyed them, his mouth set in to a hard line like he was trying, with great difficulty, not to say something.

“Explain,” he demanded, “What is going on, Y/N?”

“It’s a waypoint,” she told him, “they’re all you from different timelines.”

Five looked around the deli, taking in all of the different versions of himself. Most of them were lounging, enjoying lunch or a newspaper, while others seemed fresh out of whatever hell their timeline had to offer. A version of him was obviously very drunk, attempting to drown his sorrows in a bottle of something hard.

“How did you even know about this place?”

“I found it when you brought me down here after…everything.” She recalled, “Or more like it found me.”

Waiter Five stopped at the table, sitting two black coffees, two pastrami sandwiches and a cup of tea in front of them.

She smiled up at him, “Could you please tell the kitchen that they’re going to burn the brisket this afternoon and that they should be extra vigilant about it.”

Waiter Five seemed unperturbed by her prophecy, as if he had witnessed them a thousand times. Which she realized, he probably had. “Sure thing, sweetheart. Thanks for the heads up.”

“You’re welcome.”

“You’re not going to like that,” Booth said as Five reached for his cup, pulling a pastrami sandwich towards himself simultaneously.

“Can we stay on track, boys?” Y/N chastised, “We have a lot to figure out.”

Booth launched in to his explanation about how there was never supposed to be multiple timelines. And how their existence was the very problem they’d been trying to solve this entire time.

“When you look ahead, what do you see, Y/N?” Five questioned her.

She closed her eyes, trying to block out the various clattering and background noises of the deli, but try as she might she was met with nothing but a solid, unyielding, darkness. She expected it to feel cold or maybe lonely, but it didn’t feel like anything at all. There was nothing there at all.

“I don’t feel anything,” she concluded, opening her eyes to find two identical, worried faces watching her closely. “I can’t see anything. Usually I can at least gather little glimpses of things I can piece together but it’s dark.”

“If that’s what you’re seeing, then that means my plan will work.”

————

Five bolted out of the deli so swiftly, she didn’t have time for a proper goodbye with Booth.

She was thinking about going back when Five grabbed her arm, stopping her in her tracks, “What the hell was all of that back there? Is there something going on between you and…me? Him?”

She pulled herself out of his grip, “And why would you care if there was, Five?”

“Because I love you,” his voice cracked, “You know I love you.”

“You didn’t love me enough to not fuck Lila,” her voice wobbled, but she wouldn’t cry. Not over this. Not anymore. “You didn’t love me enough to not fall in love with her too.”

“It was seven years, Y/N. We…we didn’t think we were going to find a way home. We were alone. We were tired. You have to understand that.”

“No, I really don’t,” the anger in her chest flared up once again, red hot and burning, “You spent forty years alone

looking for a way back to your family and you did everything you could to do so. But you’re telling me that this time you gave up after just seven? I KNOW you, Five, and I know that deep down, in your heart of hearts, you always knew that you’d find a way. But you got comfortable with her and you just stopped trying.”

“What’s worse is that I could understand if it were just the three of us mixed up in this mess, but it’s not! Lila is MARRIED! Lila is a MOTHER! Lila is married to your brother and the mother to your nieces and nephew. You drove their marriage apart. You knew you would be breakup h up a family and that still didn’t stop you. You weren’t alone anymore, Five. I was there. I’ve BEEN there. I’ve always been there and that still wasn’t enough. You aren’t this sad little boy lost alone in the apocalypse. You’re a full-grown, adult man and it’s time that you own up to your mistakes. And this is a big one.”

“So what you’re saying is that I’ll never be able to fix this?” He asked, “You’re never going to forgive me? You won’t even try?”

“How could I, Five?” She took a deep breath, steadying herself, “How could I when all I can see when I think about you, is her? You kissing her. You fucking her. You loving her. And that’ll always be there. It might dull over time but it will always be there playing in the back of my mind. So, no, we can’t fix this and I don’t want to. I won’t put myself through it just to come out the other side burned again. I respect myself too much.”

“And him?”

“That’s none of your business.”

“He’s literally me. It’s very much my business.” Five was trying to sound casual, but she could tell that her words were eating at him. That it stung more than he would ever let on.

“But he’s not you, not really,” she said pointedly, “And he loves me, Five. In a way I’m not sure you ever did. Why else would we spend all of these years together and never actually move forward with our relationship? But none of that matters anyways. If we do this correctly, we’ll be gone and so will every other timeline. We’ll all cease to exist. And maybe that’s for the best.”

They stared at each other for a moment, a silent standoff.

“I do love you, you know,” Five’s voice was barely above a whisper, but his tone shattered her heart all over again, “But I never felt like I deserved you and I’m so sorry that it took me this long to realize that you’re the best thing that could have ever happened to me.”

“I’m sorry that it took you that long, too,” she said, “And I’m sorry that things have to end this way, but they are ending. In more ways than one. And we have to face it whether we’re ready for it or not.”

————

They did it. Not only had they restored things the way they should be, but they had managed to save themselves in the process.

They had lost their powers again, for good this time, but she didn’t care. If she was being truly honest with herself, she never wanted them back anyways. It was nice to look forward to the future without tiny glimpses of what was to come. Glimpses that usually set her on edge and kept her from truly living in the present.

She and Five had gone their separate ways. It was better that way. They both moved out of their shared apartment and she moved in with Allison, Claire and Klaus for a while until she found her footing again. Eventually that footing came in the form of a steady job downtown and a small studio apartment she could call her own.

As for Lila and Diego, they were continuing to try to make things work for their family. Lila had personally come to her and apologized once the dust settled. She told her that she and Diego were now attending couples counseling and were trying to move past things.

As much as she should hate Lila, she couldn’t. They would get along for Diego’s sake. Things were never going to be the way they were before, but they didn’t need to be.

Despite her newfound contentment, she thought about Booth Five often. It saddened her to know that it was likely that he no longer even existed somewhere out there.

She thought about how every Five in that deli had fought so hard to make things right but none of them had even come close to an iota, a fraction, of the happiness that they deserved.

———

It was a rainy Sunday morning and she was spending it curled up on her couch with trashy, mindless TV and a cup of tea.

She was just contemplating the idea of a nap when a soft, hesitant knock sounded at her door.

“Hold on!” She called, pausing the tv and wrapping the blanket around herself to hide the fact that she wasn’t wearing a bra and her pajamas had seen much better days. She hadn’t been expecting company.

She looked through the peep hole, her heart dropping a bit at who she found on the other side.

Five stood there, his hands in his pockets, rocking on his heels, as he waited for her to open the door. She hadn’t seen him since an impromptu family brunch over a month ago. He typically made himself scarce when she was around. Not that she blamed him.

She did a small round of the breathing exercises her therapist taught her before undoing the chain and padlock.

She had barely cracked the door open when she realized that something was just slightly off about her visitor. His eyes found hers and her breath caught in her chest. Those green eyes, as familiar to her as her own, did not belong to the Five she had expected to see.

“Booth?” She gasped, her head spinning.

He looked utterly perplexed by her nickname for him, but a grin spread across his face anyways, “You call me Booth?”

“How?” She squeaked, throwing the door open, “It is you, right?”

“It’s me,” he confirmed, “God, I’ve missed you.”

She threw herself at him, blanket forgotten, and he caught her with a surprised grunt, steadying her on her feet as she peppered his face with kisses. Wherever she could reach, she planted her lips there.

“How?” She breathlessly questioned him between kisses, “How are you here?”

“It’s a long story,” he told her, unwilling to let her go now that he finally had her in his arms, “One I promise I’ll tell you later, but right now, please don’t stop kissing me.”

She complied, stepping back just long enough to yank him in to her apartment by his collar, slamming the door behind them.

As soon as he heard the latch click, his hands were on her, starving for affection. Y/N returned those affections tenfold, scaling him without reservation.

Caution be damned.

“You’re here,” she repeated over and over, still unable to wrap her mind around it.

“I’m here,” he reassured her, running his fingertips along her spine, taking in the feel of her, “And I’m not going anywhere, if you’ll have me.”

She pressed her lips to his in answer, her fingers threading into his hair, pulling him closer.

“As if I would let you get away again.”

He chuckled against her lips before deepening the kiss, moving his hands to her waist. He dug his fingertips in there, oh so deliciously, and she melted against him. Everything with him had always felt so right, natural, from the moment he first held her in the deli.

Fated. Meant to be. Call it what you will, but she knew that being with him was worth all of the inherent risks that came with it.

They were lying in her bed, wrapped up in each other, as Booth drew lazy circles up and down her arm.

“You don’t mind me calling you Booth, do you? It was just easier to differentiate between the two of you in my head that way.”

He laughed, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head, “Sweetheart, you can call me whatever you want as long as you call me yours.”

Her cheeks warmed and she buried her face in his neck, taking in the scent that was uniquely him. Uniquely Booth.

“I love you,” she hummed.

“I love you too,” he tilted her chin up so that they were nose to nose, “Thank you for giving me a chance.”

Tag List:

@hydrationqueensworld

@mangoshorthand

@isabelcor3

@heyyitsreign

@mrfeenysmustache

[monalogs]

Hey!!! HI!!! YOUR FANFICS ARE SO GOOD AACK

Can we (the starved) please have a Nyen dating hcs?? The reader can also be Luther's pet hshshshshs I'm literally going insane godd I'm so sorry Nyen's just so... So fucking fine..

Dating headcannons ! | Nyen

➷ Paring - Nyen x Fem!Reader [Randal's Friends / Ranfren]

➷ CWs - degradation, sadism, biting/marking, blood kink, predator/prey kink, mentions of killing, hes bad at emotions okay

a/n - trying to figure out how i want to format hcs so ignore that this looks different than the luther dating hcs. please. anyhoots whos dating hcs should i start doing next >.>

Hates you a little (probably)

Not in the “wants make you suffer and kill you” type of way he usually hates, but rather the “why do you make me feel this way?” type

How you make his cheeks redden and his palms sweaty, sharp nails digging into his own skin in overwhelming nervousness. It makes him feel weird, no matter how hard he tries to hide it

To care for someone other than his master, especially just a weak, pathetic pet like you… Nyen thinks in turn it makes him weak and pathetic

Nyen knows loyalty from Luther. Knows satisfaction and pleasure from killing. But genuine love? It made him want to tear his heart out just to stop it from beating so fast when he sees you

The romance manga Randal gifted him hadn’t prepared him at all. He's reread them and reread them in an attempt to understand how he should feel but he still needed time to wrap his head around the reality of being in a relationship

Did feel like he needed permission from his master to be with you. Thankfully, Luther was happy (how cute!) as long as it didn't affect his pet duties. Nyen doesn't know what he would've done if Luther said no.

Doesn't like terms like boyfriend/girlfriend/partner, you're just his.

Calls you baby or sweetheart. Some pet names you’d hear a trashy construction worker catcall a woman down the street with. His gruff voice doesn't help

Doesn't really care what you call him as long as it isn't sickly sweet… does have the smallest thing for being called sir… but only in private!

He most likely wouldn't act much like a good boyfriend in front of people. Sorry, his own pride is just too high to look all lovey-dovey in front of others

Basically the embodiment of “he's just bullying you because he likes you!” you’d get from an adult when a boy would torment you in school. Except he actually does like you. Weirdo

Nyen’s more comfortable when it’s just you, which means he doesn't feel the need to be brooding and scary in private

Loves to lay on your lap and have his head pet while he reads or watches television like the catman he is. Eventually falls asleep after some time so don't dare move.

Nyen’s schedule tends to be the same, he's not all about change. His day consists of doing what Luther tells him, working out, and watching out for pests or danger

Still about the same since you guys have been together, but he tries include you in his day as much as possible

It can be nice, like him wanting you to watch him workout. Making sure to show off his abs and biceps… acts like he doesn't do it on purpose for you to oogle at

Nonchalantly boasts about how he can pick you up with ease, no matter what you weigh

Has in fact proved it multiple times by carrying you around place to place

Wouldn't mind you exercising with him– but be careful. He's a harsh trainer, can and will push you until you're a sweaty, exhausted mess. Kinda turns him on…

Other times, he’ll drag you into more dangerous or scary situations just so he can protect you

You're his perfect damsel in distress, someone to run into his arms and hold closely

Actually wouldn’t let you be in real danger. But if he knows he can handle it, (which he can) he’s not opposed to your praise about how he’s saved you

On the opposite end, Nyen also enjoys playing hunting and chasing games with you. There are times when he has taken you to a nearby forest, releasing your hand where the evergreens are the thickest, and in his low voice, he says, “Run.”

He loves to focus on the scurry of leaves crunching beneath your feet, the sight of your figure trying to keep up ahead of him, and the sound of your rapid breathing as he gets closer and closer

Nyen pounces and catches you every single time, dark pupils dilated with pure adrenaline as he constrains you. Hours will pass before you’re home again

There's not many date-like activities Nyen is interested in doing. Nyen doesn’t care to plan them, you live together anyways!

But if you insist, a picnic is the go-to. Simple, outside of the house, and he gets to have as much beer and undercooked chicken as you can stuff into a basket

Can also take you out on late night drives. Speeding down long, tree lined roads as CD music blasts with a hand resting on your thigh. (Nice!)

Does go out of his way to hit any animal(man?) unfortunate enough to be on the road. If he manages, he’ll pull over and make you look at the mangled body with him (Not so nice.)

Lots of territorial behavior. Nyen loves to share his extra clothes or his cigs (if you smoke) so you’re smelling like him. It just connects you two together, without having to say a word

Speaking of territorial… marks a lot. Biting, scratching, hickies. Even bruises if he's extra rough

He doesn't let you hide them. Would probably explode if he caught you trying to cover them with makeup or clothes and end up punishing you by marking even more

Libido is very high. Didn't actually get much action before being with you, mostly jerking off after a successful kill

But with you? Practically at any chance, he will

Doesn't care if you haven't showered, shaved, or prepped in any way. Will always find you incredibly attractive and irresistible

Even if you have periods, he’ll still pin you against the wall and rub his cock against you. The blood turns him on baby!

Has a fantasy of you being covered in the blood of one of his victims while he fucks you. Maybe less of fantasy and more of a goal. One day…

Treats it like a game, pulling and teasing you beforehand. Nails dug into your hips, a low voice in your ear whispering about how you’ve been teasing him “like the slut you are”

Drags you away from whatever you're doing. Not sneaky or polite when he pins you against the closest surface available, the only gentleness being the steady growl of his voice. Nothing possibly can't be as important as the need to stuff his aching cock inside what's his

Has fucked you in every room besides his Master’s and Randal’s. Would just be too weird…

Wants to see you in every angle, lighting, position possible. Every feature of you is etched into his brain. Knows you down to the freckle

A sadist (duh), but cares about you feeling good too. Won't hurt you too bad, though his definition of what is too bad might be different from yours. He wants you alive and mostly conscious

Made an effort to learn proper aftercare and to be less selfish, as he never felt the need to before

Still uses too much teeth when giving head and offers you a lukewarm bottle of water after sex… but it's the thought that counts!

Has a bunk with Nyon and still makes you sleep with him. Problem tends to be that it's wayyyy too tiny for both of you. You’ve complained to him to ask Luther for a bigger and separate bed but he gruffly responded for you to shut up and let him spoon in peace

Kicks Nyon out of the room a lot so it could just be the two of you. It's almost childish, bitching and hissing if Nyon doesn't give up his space. Poor guy, he just wants to lay in bed and smoke :/

Bit of a night owl, doesn't actually need to sleep much yet he still likes to. but does so very late. You’ll only know he's in bed when he snores against your neck

Always awake first, he's got more important things to do than lay around in bed with you (as he claims)

Will come back a bit later and wake you up with a cup of the most bitter black coffee in a cheesy matching mug. Just as an apology for the scratch and bite marks leading between your thighs he gave you last night. Drink it all, it's rude if you don't :(

[crisis-starter]

Mirabelle’s thing took more effort than I thought!

Mostly because I… can’t really take anymore of the innate desire to scrap what I just wrote because the grammatical and punctuational errors in the Change God’s dialogue, though purposeful, are driving me up the wall.

For now, have a Mirabelle Loops thing…

)•{+}•<>+<>•{+}•(

Mirabelle was… perplexed to be brought back to the room where her Change God statue was, even though they already had obtained the Keyknife (or Knifekey, as Siffrin called it after it was sharpened). The group had looked the room up and down and had nothing else left to investigate. So why were they here again? Siffrin seemed to look at the statue in thought.

Mirabelle glanced at Bonnie, who seemed to try and gauge the correct timing for something. Mirabelle was about to ask before Siffrin called, “Mira, can you put your hand on the statue?” The housemaiden turned to look at Siffrin before complying hesitantly, “Hm? Um, sure?” It was a fairly simple thing. It wouldn’t hurt to try.

It wasn’t painful, but hearing a whistle and then waking up in a white void is not something you expect to experience on a normal day. Or, rather, as normal as the day before the end of the world can get. But hey! At least Mirabelle isn’t alone! Siffrin is with her!

She was about to ask Siffrin to hear their opinion before the rogue entered a fighting stance and informed, “Someone’s there, Mira!” Mirabelle’s head snapped to the figure approaching them, startled. She needed to help Siffrin! But wait… isn’t that… “The… the Head Housemaiden?”

Euphrasie looked almost… offended? Then a buzzer sounded for some odd reason. It slightly distracted her before she noticed the Euphrasie was replaced by Bonnie! The shape shifting figure feigned despair, “mirabelle!!! how could you not recognize little old me!?!?! (·•᷄∩•᷅ )” How on earth did the figure do that with their mouth? Things aside, “They changed shapes!” It was… nice to know Siffrin was just as unnerved as she was.

The figure shifted to look like Siffrin for a sec, startling the rogue next to Mirabelle a bit. They put their hands on their hips before giggling, “well yeah!! don’t you know who I am?? (*´▽`*)” Mirabelle took a second to think before expressing her own little version of shock, “The Change God?!” The figure shifted into Bonnie before twirling and exclaiming with a big smile, “ding ding ding!!! hiya! it’s me, the change god!!! ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧”

Mirabelle paused to interpret what she was seeing. The guilt of being a bad housemaiden started to hit her like a truck. And if Siffrin’s concern and the Change God’s shock were anything to indicate, Mirabelle was bawling. In a state of surprise, the Change God shifted to look like Mirabelle for a second before turning into Isabeau, trying to comfort her, “mirabelle!!! what happened?? im sorry if i upset you!! (˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )”

Mirabelle wiped her tears, hiccups lacing her words, “No no… it’s th-that… I’m sorry for being a bad housemaiden. For stagnating, for not trying new things… For not… Changing…” She feels safer, just being cutesy Mirabelle. Even the title of Savior stresses her out to no end! So undergoing Change itself? That would feel tantamount to scaling a mountain with nothing to break your fall.

The Change God looked blankly at Mirabelle before saying, “oh that!!! dont worry about it ╮ (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ╭ I dont care” Now it was Mirabelle’s turn to be confused, “Huh?” The figure shifted to look like Odile before explaining, “if i was mad about it then i wouldn’t have helped you as much as i did right? but well wouldja look at that! you got the keyknife!!! i did it because I believe in you!! ٩(^ᗜ^ )و ´-“ Siffrin looked less tense, but still bit alarmed. The Change God continued, shifting to look like a star… person for a split second, “also… THIS PLAY NEEDS MORE VARIETY. BUT DO NOT WORRY. YOU WILL FIND AID. YOU JUST NEED TO LEARN WHEN TO CATCH IT.”

Mirabelle stopped crying. She was startled by the final thing the Change God told her. A play? Nonetheless, she felt at least a bit reassured. The Change God shifted to look like Isabeau before starting to talk, “i will tell you something very important, so listen close. ( •̀ - •́ )” The change god reverted to Isabeau’s image, “for a ton of reasons, you won’t remember it!” They cocked their head sightly to the side, “well, your mind won’t but your heart will!!! ଘ(੭´꒳`)°* ੈ‧₊˚” They sighed, “it’s true that i don’t help humans much, but my measly god powers are nothing compared to yours!!! ৻( •̀ ᗜ •́ ৻) you’re doing incredible mirabelle, even if you don’t believe it at first (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶) but, just in case that isn’t enough…”

The Change God abandoned the appearances and revealed Mirabelle’s statue, but animated. They softened their voice to something gentle, a far cry from the dramatic display they gave prior, “you are loved, mirabelle. i see you changing, even if you do not. you are always changing, always evolving. you are not stagnating in any way. and even if you were, that would be fine, because life is about changes but it’s also about staying right where you are sometimes. I am proud of you,” they immediately switched back to their expressive self, “and i love you!!!! ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂)⸝♡ and i love the stupid ugly face you gave me and i wont ever let anyone destroy it!!! o( ˶^▾^˶ )o remember that okay!!! (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)”

Mirabelle smirked before giggling, “Thank you, Change God. You are nothing like I was expecting, but…” The housemaiden gave a big smile, “I would expect nothing less from you!” She thought she spotted something from the corner of her eye. Was Siffrin still… suspicious? But the Change God has been so…

Then the god snapped her out of her thought process, looking like Bonnie this time, “before you go, i have a gift for you! ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝ꕤ*.ﾟ” the whistle of wind sounded in her ears. Mirabelle looked at the Change God confused, “What wa-“ The Change God giggled before saying, “bye bye now!!! i’ll talk to siffrin and then it’s back to the mission at hand!!! ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ”

Mirabelle panicked, calling out, “WAIT! WHAT…” her voice faltered when she found herself in the prayer room again, “…was that?” Siffrin woke up from a trance seconds after, slightly pensive about… something. Mirabelle felt weird. Something like… being able to learn more? No, not that exactly. More like… agh it barely makes sense in her head.

Isabeau questioned if she and Siffrin were alright. He commented that it looked like you both looked almost… half conscious. Hm. Mirabelle caught Odile’s suggestion that the team should proceed if everyone was okay. You agreed with her assessment. You and your rag tag group of friends should get going.

You have a king to defeat and a country to save after all.

)•{+}•<>+<>•{+}•(

MIRABELLE IS DONE

Okay, so here’s what I’m going to do about the filler posts. I’ve decided that I’ll put the filler posts through a queue.

I‘ve also decided to maybe try all of the options. Because most of them are very new to me.

I don’t doodle or draw as much as you’d be led to believe (and even then they are quite abstract I guess?), and I’ve never touched digital art. I’ve never run an ask blog before. I’ve given WIP commentary to friends on Discord but not on Tumblr. So… I am just the slightest bit nervous that I might do something wrong…..

But anyway, here is my challenge on Odile’s chapter:

Putting this entire scene into words from Odile’s perspective.

To my darling audience:

Good Morning

Good Day

Good Afternoon

Good Evening

Good Night

[aladaylessecondblog]

Red Mountain Waffle House pt. 13

Author's Note: Tw for some blood. Jiub is a troll. For those looking for canon Sotha Sil behavior, boy are YOU gonna be disappointed

This one snuck up on me

---------------------------

One week, then two.

Jiub found his Venmo occasionally pinging with small amounts from Sadara, who sent apology notes in each one. Honestly, he didn't blame her, but he wouldn't say no to to the extra money. He turned her room into another grow spot and it was doing okay, but still not to the level that having her there to contribute to rent had.

She hadn't come back, but there hadn't been much for her to come back for. A dresser, a bed. Those handful of receipts from Suran in the trash can he still hadn't emptied.

The Waffle House was doing a little worse for her absence, at least in his opinion.

The new waitress was an ashlander, and icily polite to those with corprus. Maybe they weren't the best people, but their money spent like anyone else's, and he couldn't figure out why all of a sudden NOW Nibani would want to piss them off by instructing new employees to act like this. It had driven off a few of them, or at least he thought so - it was hard to tell some of the ash ghouls apart from one another.

A few of the ash creatures had asked where Sadara was. The new waitress didn't know; neither did Nibani, whose answer was, "She no longer works here."

Jiub kept silent; he sure as hell wasn't talking. Sadara had sent him a Discord message (she'd outright deleted Morrotwitter) asking him to not tell anyone where she was, and he'd kept to it.

She didn't hadn't added any specifics about what exactly had happened on her little trip to Red Mountain. He'd asked a second time and she replied, 'Nothing we're not used to hearing.'

For a few days after that she sent random pictures of gnarly wounds from fighting cliffracers and other wildlife, and then of the scars once she healed up. There were also a few pics of cliffracers being turned on a spit over a fire, and a little 'wish you were here this thing tasted great' message a couple days in row.

Then there started being images of the inside of some cave along the coast near Tel Fyr.

The Fyrs are paying me 200 gold a week for blood and plasma, apparently I'm RH null blood type. it's special or something. and being immune to corprus makes them want it too, so. Not doing too bad.

Sounds great. What's up with the cave?

Oh, it's near Tel Fyr. Easy access. There's some khajiit and argonians here too, cave's big enough to share, so we do.

How do you share a cave?

We just have bedrolls in different areas. I feel like I got the biggest spot because it used to be a slave pen and they don't want to sleep over here ever again. It's not that bad. We've even got pets.

the fuck kind of pets do you have over there? lost scribs?

couple of fat slaughterfish we feed fish and scraps to. One we call Betty White and the other we call Wilson. They try to bite us but honestly they're big enough it's hard for them to move fast enough for it. So they'll mainly just hiss and make noise until they get food.

"Excuse me, cook? Are you paying any attention to the food at all, or are you destroying my eggs on purpose?"

"Your eggs are fine," Jiub replied, tucking his phone away. The customer in question had come in a few times, and was - well, honestly, such a stick in the mud it was fun to tease him. He was very particular about his food, wanted his waffles turn an even number of times...so Jiub always made sure not to do that.

Sotha Sil himself. Not all that impressive, at least not to Jiub. He said he came there because the sound of the blight winds was relaxing, and when he needed relative silence this was a good place to have it.

And his fried eggs were always just slightly runny.

"Here, I'll redo 'em if you want, I was hungry anyway."

He handed a newly finished plate of waffles to the new waitress, who took them to another ashlander in the corner.

"Do you have no pride at all in your work?"

"I'm cooking eggs and waffles for 10 septims an hour, there is no pride in this work," Jiub replied with a shrug.

"You are an insubordinate imp--no. No, I will waste no more time on your shenanigans. This is not what I am here for. Just cook the food." Sotha Sil huffed, and turned back to the laptop in front of him.

It was a far cry from the nigh-emotionless construct Jiub had heard Sotha Sil described as. Something, it seemed, had set the man on edge...he'd asked a couple people if something had happened to set Sotha Sil off what he was usually like. Most people couldn't see such little things, little signs of being potentially angry, or annoyed, or any number of similar things. But due to long experience, Jiub was a master at seeing it.

He'd reached a point in his life where he was looking to get humbled again. His success with Almalexia had made him feel almost bored - if he could off her so easily (however temporarily it lasted), really, how much farther was there to go? Maybe Sotha Sil would be different. Maybe he'd be tougher, somehow...

How little a thing would it take to push him over and make him screech?

He could already hear Sadara's voice chiding him for it. You little troll, you just want your ass kicked, don't you?

Well. Maybe he did.

The waitress went outside to handle the garbage, and so Jiub was the one to deliver the plated food. He glanced down at the laptop, and saw a familiar sight.

A Pokemon battle.

And more importantly...

"Superiorsil? So it's YOU! I should've guessed," Jiub set the food down and went over to clean the stove.

"What do you mean, you should've guessed?" Sotha Sil's voice had turned accusatory.

Jiub turned back, and gave a deep smirk as he extended his hand. "Jiuberjabber. How ya doin'?"

A pause.

A long, uncomfortable pause.

And then, Sotha Sil - master of the monotone, king of the cutting politeness, suzerain of stony looks - leaped over the counter and wrapped both hands around JIub's neck.

Both mer crashed to the ground and despite the pain and increasing lack of oxygen all Jiub could do was laugh.

"You idiot--pathetic--little WORM!" Sotha Sil was snarling, "You broke my perfect record!"

"It's just a game, man," Jiub struggled, trying to get one hand into his back pocket. Still the laughter persisted, even harder because he saw how much it infuriated the mer above him. Or maybe it was due to the choking. "Don't take it so seriously."

He managed to get his trusty box-cutter out, and took a few stabs in the area of his opponent's ribs. Jiub and Sotha Sil wrestled about in this fashion another few minutes, getting the latter's blood all over the floor.

"What happened to the calm magus, huh?" Jiub, still giddy from the lack of air, went on, finally getting to his feet and backing away, box-cutter at the ready. "Oh, wait, you are what the people need you to be, right? I've read the sermons."

"That wasn't IN the sermons you illiterate cretin," Sotha Sil stood, his pristine white robe now utterly ruined. The stab wounds were healed over quickly, and he looked ready to fight--

--and then suddenly bristled, snatched a to-go box, stuffed the food he'd left uneaten into it.

"Come back soon," Jiub, still in the mood to tease, energized by the fight, blew a capricious kiss at the furious mer before him.

Sotha Sil left, muttering under his breath.

Jiub then looked at the ashlander in the corner.

"You gonna tell the Temple about that?"

"Who the fuck would believe me?"

Grumbling, and thinking he was far too sober for this, Jiub moved off to the bathroom to snort some skooma. Nibani would be in within an hour, and he needed the blood cleaned up by then. The waitress, utterly horrified by what she had just witnessed, didn't look like she was going to be staying long enough to do the job.

[vbs-kaitos-big-naturals]

i think the main thing i hate about 'suicide units' in school health classes is how bad the advice is. like wtf??? no dont tell a persons parents theyre suicidal without the persons permission thats fucked up

instead of doing what school tells you, please follow these rules:

dont tell authority figures about someone's suicidal thoughts/sh unless you know theyre in active danger or they gave you permission. its a breach of privacy and trust, and it could put them in a bad spot if their parents are abusive.

please dont treat a suicidal person with pity/babying. its just plain demeaning. unless youre sure theyre okay with something else, treat them normally and just check in on them more.

and if YOURE suicidal, they dont even teach you how to deal with it or cope, they just give you 988/other hotline and send you on your way. its superficial care.

here are some ACTUAL tips if youre suicidal/struggling in anyway with mental illness:

if you cant do things the way youre supposed to, then cut corners. some is better than nothing.

the little things can make a difference. seeing your keychain always makes you feel a little better, so take that keychain everywhere. it wont fix everything, but a little bit of joy can go a long way.

find other people who are struggling like you. online spaces are a good start! however, if you feel like the environment is just making you feel negative and more depressed, you should leave to prevent further harm.

FIND THINGS YOU ENJOY. please. whether it be rhythm games, reading, drawing, hell, doing math equations, things that youre passionate about can be like a rock to support yourself when it gets bad. they make you feel better, they give you a purpose (though you dont need one to be worthy of life, remember that) and they give you something to connect to others with.

try to get some sunlight. vitamin D deficiency is awful and can cause serious depression, so letting the sun do its job can make you feel a little better. bonus points for either going outside or opening a window to get fresh air!

as soon as you can comfortably and safely do so, please try to go to a therapist to help you figure out how to cope with your symptoms. theyll still be there, but they can live alongside you instead of preventing you from living.

a lot of this stuff can be good for executive dysfunction too! if you need depression meals, a basic rule of thumb is to try and get all the food groups. if you only have instant noodles and some eggs, then make the instant noodles as cook the eggs in the broth. if you only have rice, peanuts, and some hot sauce, put those together. etc etc. there are tons of great resources out there too, ill probably reblog later with some.

most of all, of you seriously think youre at your wits end and might kill yourself after another issue, or maybe your parents yelled at you, or maybe you got laid off, whatever it is, call a hotline. things can be fixed, but if theyre fixed when youre gone, you wont be around to see how happy you could be :(

okay thats all. i hope i gave a few people better health education than school did. try to drink some water and maybe have a snack if you havent, and remember, i love you!!

(ps im not a licensed professional nor am i an expert, ive just been pretty depressed and suicidal for a long time, so this is speaking from mine and other's experience. if anyone else has something to say on it, i encourage sharing!! lets use our collective knowledge to defeat the pta mandated shallow health class)

[silverwhittlingknife]

So you're a go to source for all things Dick&Tim bros and you tend to write primarily from Dick's POV. So, odd question, but if you were to summarize their relationship from his POV in FIVE panels which panels would you pick? Keeping in mind that one specific aspect of their relationship that you love needs to be clearly represented by each panel (loyalty, trust etc). I hope this is a fun challenge and not an annoying question so if you don't want to answer that's cool! Have a wonderful day!

No more talk. The same thoughts run through two minds... (SotB 29) / You're my equal. My closest ally. (RR 1) / I can't stop thinking how much I rely on him. (GoG 3)

25 Feelings Dick Has About Tim

This was such a kind ask & a cool challenge which I totally failed; here are TWENTY-five panels of Dick's POV on Tim sdfdsfds Look, I got carried away! Marcia and Cindy! The boys!!

OKAY SO BEFORE I GET TO THE PANELS A FEW NOTES:

WARNING THAT THERE ARE SOME NEGATIVE EMOTIONS IN HERE because I love conflict but but but you gotta remember those are not the final word!! They are complicated people and sometimes they get mad at each other BUT ultimately their relationship is so hugely important in both their lives & they love each other and rely on each other so much -!!! <3

Also I have CONCLUDING THOUGHTS at the end about what Dick's POV leaves out (mostly: a lot of Dick defending & protecting & supporting Tim, which Dick does instinctively but isn't very self-aware about most of the time)

I have loosely organized my list into 5^5 format (5 categories with 5 examples each!), so if you want to skip to a relevant one, here are the categories!!

Below the cut:

I hate him and find him infuriating (#1-5)

On second thought, he's endearing & fun (#6-10)

Grief is complicated & he's all tangled up in mine (#11-15)

I love him & think highly of him (#16-20)

I rely on him & though it's hard for me, I trust him (#21-25)

I hate him and find him infuriating (#1 - 5)

1) He thinks he’s so smart and can psychoanalyze me and Bruce, but he doesn’t know me at all, he should get lost (New Titans 61)

2) He thinks he’s so smart and can psychoanalyze Bruce but he doesn’t know Bruce at all, he should get lost (Gotham Knights 26)

3) He is so nosy about stuff that is MY business (Robin 0)

4) He sounds like an insincere suck-up half the time... but okay, fine, if you push him he's got a sense of humor about it (New Titans 65)

5) I'm sure he's a better vigilante than me. It's my fault for being a failure, but I resent him anyway. (Nightwing 9 - Dick's having a nightmare)

On second thought, he's kinda endearing (#6-10)

6) He worries too much and gets anxious so easily, but it makes him fun to tease (Robin 67)

7) I'm not that competitive - okay, so maybe I'm a little competitive, I gotta make sure he doesn't get a swelled head (Prodigal)

8) I'm supposed to be his favorite! It is not cool for him to be fanboying over my not-girlfriend's not-boyfriend!! (Birds of Prey 19)

9) We have fun together. I can kick back and relax when it's just the two of us. Plus I get to boss him around a bit. (Prodigal)

10) He’s always trying to reassure me, and I guess it's a little comforting, but also he doesn’t really get it. Or me. He makes excuses that he shouldn't, because he doesn't understand that I suck. (Nightwing 64)

Grief is complicated and he's all tangled up in mine (#11 - 15)

11) He reminds me of everything I try not to think about. Sometimes the memories are so strong it hurts to look at him. (Batman 441)

12) WHY IS HE BEING IMPOSSIBLE ALL OF A SUDDEN??? THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING (Nightwing 139)

13) We're the same. He says all the things I don't let myself think about. It's like arguing with myself. (Nightwing 139)

14) He thinks he gets to tell me what to do but he doesn’t, fuck him (Battle for the Cowl)

15) Life sucks, so what. I sucked it up so he should too (RR 1)

I love him and think highly of him (#16 - 20)

16) He’s the closest thing to a brother I’ll ever have.  If someone hurts him I will hurt them harder. (Nightwing 6)

17) I can't handle the idea of losing him. (Nightwing 97)

17) He’s so good and I’m not. I'm afraid I’m bad for him. (Nightwing 110)

18) He’s better than me, and it’s kind of a relief because I know no matter what he’ll be okay. (Gates of Gotham 3)

19) In my head he’s the responsible one.  (Gotham Knights 10)

I rely on him, and though it's hard for me, I trust him (#20-25)

20) I know I have to trust him but I'm afraid he'll make the wrong choices and get hurt (Nightwing 139)

21) I'm sure I know what he should do because I see myself in him - not that I can take my own advice, but he should (Blackest Night 3)

22) I trust him.  When I’m losing my grip on things, he pulls me back. (Gotham Knights 10)

23) I want him to trust me (Red Robin 12)

24) He can tell when I'm lying. Sometimes he sees my weaknesses better than I wish he did. (Detective Comics 874)

25) He’s always there when I need him. (Teen Titans / Outsiders Secret Files)

Final rambling thoughts:

TIM: Uhh, okay, so I'm just skimming this list - do you really trust me? you're not just saying that? - but anyway, I'm confused because you left some stuff out? Like some stuff that's kinda important? DICK: No? I think I got everything? TIM (starts counting on his fingers): The time I was having a bad day but then I called you. The time I got captured by Two-Face but then you saved me. The time I fell off a train but then you saved me. The time I fell off a building but then you saved me. The time I fell off a different building - DICK: I feel like you're trying to make some kind of point but I'm not sure what it could be.

SO THE THING IS, I put 25 panels in here and not a single one has Dick catching Tim when he’s falling!!! But I think that's a central motif of their relationship from Tim’s POV, not Dick’s. I love Dick, but in some ways I think he is spectacularly un-self-aware.

And I think he especially has a lot of blind spots about Tim. He kinda intermittently gets that Tim admires him, and he enjoys it in a playful I-get-to-boss-you-around way. But Dick tends to consistently underestimate all of his own good qualities & skills, and he meets Tim at a point in his life when he's especially down on himself & his abilities. And so he's unable to see his own influence on Tim, & therefore unable to fully understand a lot of Tim's priorities and loyalties and motivations, because you can't actually understand Tim without understanding Dick's impact on him. There's a fascinating moment in Bruce Wayne: Murderer when Dick's completely blindsided & upset to discover that Tim doesn't entirely trust Bruce, even though this has been a definitive fact of Tim's whole thing ever since he showed up with his Batman needs Robin theory, and Barbara has to actively remind Dick of the obvious-to-everyone-except-Dick fact that a lot of Tim's loyalty is to Dick, and Tim loves Bruce but feels free to be more wary of him. (And to give Bruce credit: this is not something he ever begrudges.) But anyway Babs points this out, and Dick manages to sorta process it for about five seconds, but he cannot actually accept it into his worldview so instead he discards it at the speed of light and goes off and has an argument with Tim instead sdfsfdsf

All of Dick's virtues - Dick's kindness at the circus and Dick's determination to fight through grief and Dick's rigid sense of morals and Dick's vigilante skills and every time Dick has ever backed Tim up or listened to him or protected him or saved him from something or just been casually kind to a stranger in Tim's presence etc etc etc - all these things loom really large in Tim's mental story of Who Dick Is, and What Dick And Tim's Relationship Is. Tim meets Dick before he meets Bruce, trusts Dick more than Bruce, aspires to be Robin instead of Batman. And so in Tim's default version of the story, Dick is the super-special and admirable hero and Tim is... nobody in particular, a tagalong outsider who's barely managing to be a hero, not part of Dick and Bruce's family and not part of their story, who, if he's VERY LUCKY and tries REALLY HARD, might be able to fight his way to proving himself and offering something to Dick that Dick will value, if Dick doesn't get fed up with him first.

But that's not Dick's version of the story!!!

Dick's version of the story is almost the exact opposite, a story where Dick's an outcast failure black sheep who's screwing up everything he tries, and meanwhile Tim is The Sudden New Perfect Robin Who's Better Than Me And Probably Bruce Loves Him More And Probably They Gossip About What A Loser I Am, mixed with a complicated edge of Tim Thinks He's So Smart But He Doesn't Know Me/Us At All. Dick gets much more attached to Tim over time, and Tim gets unnervingly better at the know-it-all psychoanalysis so then Dick gets to have complicated feelings about him being right instead of just annoyance at him for being wrong, plus Dick's relationship with Bruce improves a lot, so Tim stops feeling so threatening. But Dick never fundamentally changes his basic theory of their relationship in which Tim is highly impressive and capable, and Dick is not so much.

And so asking Dick about Tim is kinda like if you asked George Bailey to tell you about Harry Bailey in It's A Wonderful Life; like, you'll be there for five hours while he tells you how great Harry is, and how accomplished Harry is, and how he doesn't really get how or why Harry does the things he does, and maybe George does feel a little resentful or jealous sometimes, but that pales in comparison to all his admiration and trust for Harry who he loves so much, who's better than him in so many ways, and he's not gonna openly gripe but secretly he can't help but feel sometimes like he's such a failure in comparison to Harry, a perfect person who emerged fully formed from Zeus's head with all the virtues and also all the accomplishments, etc. etc. etc. --

-- and he will not actually remember the part where he changed and saved Harry's whole entire life unless you literally send him to an alternate timeline in order to force him to remember it. <3

[brother-emperors]

‘Is there a point to any of this or do you just want to see how much more I can take?’ snaps Crassus. ‘Oh, I knew there was still some bite left in you,’ says Cethegus, thrilled. Cethegus teaches Crassus the art of politics and the ways of business. Sulla is not a fan.

Sulla: the Last Republican, Arthur Keaveney

Crassus, Catilina, and the Vestal Virgins, Ronald Syme

Sulla: the Last Republican, Arthur Keaveney

[bowsbar]

pillowbook thoughts because ive been thinking about them all day!