#ff omegaverse

[winthorntales]

Ember wanted to feel Arik’s everything. Fall asleep in her arms, pretend yesterday never happened, and tomorrow would never come. Every kiss cast this spell, every caress and hurried breath against her neck bound it.

Fury Heart Alpha, Chapter 52

[hellfire--cult]

Edit of Eddie: pitifulbaby

Chapters: Masterlist (Go here to see list of chapters, plotline and general warnings.)

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Tropes: Enemies to Lovers, Non-Traditional Omegaverse, Slow burn, Modern!AU, Mechanic!Eddie

⚠️18+: sexual tension, slight drinking, pining, jealousy, reader being childish, smacking, smut

wc: 16.3K

A/N: It's been a while, but it is here and it's steamy as fuck boys.

Anyways, Enjoy! ❤️ And don't forget to always support me by hitting the reblog button or leave a comment!

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CHAPTER 18

“I’m not going to forget you mom.”

Your mother was looking at you with tear filled eyes as you packed your last bag into the trunk of your car. Leaving your hometown was not part of your plan of the year at all. You figured you would be cradling your baby in your arms by now, having your husband at your side lending you a hand and messing up while changing diapers, laughing at both of your clumsiness even if you had prepared yourselves for it with books.

“It’s just, you’re moving far away from me. I won’t be able to visit you at all… Why don’t you reconsider–”

“I have to leave! I can’t stay here mom. It’s too–” You slammed the trunk shut as your hands went towards your eyes, covering them as a sob tried to rip out from your chest. You felt your mother’s arms wrap around you and pull you towards her chest. Her hand went to the back of your head as she made soft shushing noises to calm the turmoil of emotions that started to unravel inside of you.

“I know… I know baby girl. It’s painful…” Your tears started to wet the palms of your hands as you felt yourself lean on her shoulder. Her left hand went to your back to rub you in soothing circles, letting you cry one last time. This really was not in your plans at all. After a minute she pulled away from you and you lowered your hands to show her a pouty lip and tear stained cheeks. “I’m a phone call away, you know that.”

“Yeah, I know.” You sniffled as she took a deep breath in, a small smile appearing on her lips.

“But I repeat, don’t forget about me when you start dating.” You rolled your eyes with a sigh at that, shaking your head.

“I’m done with that. I don’t think I’ll date for a while.” Was your response, making your mother sigh with a smile.

“Whatever you say, my little dove.”

“Ngh…”

You whimpered as you started gaining consciousness, hearing the birds chirp, and– You felt like you were ran over by a fucking truck. Everything hurts. Every limb and joint hurts, even your jaw feels tense and hard to move, but there is still a sense of relief. Satisfaction.

Oh you were comfortable, like flying on clouds even if everything hurts. The pain was nothing compared to how accomplished you felt, or how satiated your body, even if spent, felt. You could lay here all day, on this soft mattress, with these sheets that were warm around you, with the fluffy pillow underneath your head, with the arm that was wrapped around your waist–

Hang on.

Your eyes snapped open and your first view of the day was Eddie Munson’s sleeping face.

He was laying on his side, facing you, while you were facing him. Your heart started beating rapidly as the memories of last night began flipping in your head like a scrapbook, and the more you remembered, the more flustered you got. 

You cannot even recognize who you were last night. You were completely feral, animalistic, not caring about anyone or anything but Eddie and the pleasure that he could bring you. Pleasure that you haven’t felt in a while, or maybe ever. You remembered him rising you from the floor, eating you out like it was his sole purpose in life. How his cock filled you, and how good he was in fucking you disrespectfully.

Your embarrassment caught up with you as you remembered how you moaned his name, how you teared up from the pleasure, from how good he was making you feel and then how he talked dirty to you. Your face was in flames, and your belly turned with nervousness as the kisses started flashing in your mind. So many kisses and whispers–

“You take me so well Peach…” 

You cringed slightly, but not out of disgust or second hand embarrassment, but because it flustered you. It was making you feel things you didn’t want to feel right now, like butterflies for example. You wanted to shoot those bastards down, because Eddie was just a friend, and you two were only curious about one another, that’s all. 

You licked your lips as you started to wiggle out of his embrace, moving backwards on the bed towards the edge. He groaned in his slip as his arm flopped to the bed once you got out of his reach. You stared at him for a while as you inspected his sleeping figure. He looked so peaceful like this, pretty even. His lashes were perfect, his stubble was neatly done, his hair was untied and–

You have to stop. You can’t keep looking at him with intentions of staying. What makes you think he wants you here when he wakes up? It was just a quick fuck the remaining hatred out kind of thing, that’s all it was for crying outloud. You bit your bottom lip as you got out of the sheets and turned to finally sit on the edge and pull yourself off the bed and–

“SHIT–” Your legs gave up on you, making you fall back down on the bed, ass hitting the mattress, making it bounce and of course, Eddie was shaken awake.

“Wha– What–?” He was sleepy, his voice raspy and it made your body shiver with its tone. You panicked as you realized you were completely naked, top to bottom, growing way too self-conscious about your situation. You grabbed onto a very thin polar fleece black blanket that had pooled at both your feet, and you put it all over the front but your back was still bare to him.

Your breathing was quick as you felt the bed move, and you closed your eyes while your heart wanted to kill you at the moment from how fast it was beating, threatening to explode. What is gonna happen now? What is going to become of the two of you? Did you two just fuck up your entire friendship? Your relationship? You have to say something, you can’t be shocked all day, sooner or later you’ll have to face him and talk, better that be now.

You turned your head around to look at him, and your breath simply cut off at the sight of him. He sat on the bed, the sheet covering his bottom half, his entire chest on display, his hair down as he rubbed one of his eyes. Your gaze went downwards towards his happy trail that went below the sheet, covering the trail you still wanted to follow. You didn’t notice his eyes were already open and looking at you, and a lazy smirk displayed on his lips.

“Wow, don’t make yourself too obvious, Peach.” You snapped out of your thoughts, your eyes going back towards his face. Embarrassment took over you and you whipped your head around again, trying to calm your breathing. It was already pathetic to be like this when he was this calm in front of you.

But unbeknownst to you, he wasn’t in the slightest. He was good at hiding his emotions, afraid people could know or read him as easily as he could with others… just like he knows you are completely losing your shit right now. 

“Um… I, uh… I fell.” What the fuck are you saying? Stupidity, that’s what. You heard a rough chuckle from behind you and you didn’t know how his eyes were looking at your naked back. He wanted to reach out and rub his hand all over it, and he clenched his jaw as he felt his dick twitch underneath the sheet. He can only imagine looking down at your back as he rails into you and– he needs to stop.

“I could feel that. Too rough for you?” There was mocking behind his tone, which sparked a bit of anger inside you. You stood up from the bed, and his breath hitched when seeing your bare ass for just a second. He bit the inside of his cheek as you turned around and damn you looked so good right now. Your makeup was all smeared, your hair a mess, and his blanket draped over your front as you clung it close to your chest with both hands. You looked fucked, literally fucked.

“Oh? As far as I remember, someone got a bit pussy drunk yesterday.” He threw his head back with a loud laugh, seeing his adam’s apple bobbing up and down at the motion, making your legs tremble more than what they are now thanks to the soreness. Shit, you are not sure if you can do more than two steps without tumbling over.

“Excuse me? I’m pretty sure Gareth who lives three blocks away heard you moaning my name Peach.” Your face grew fifty times hotter, your cheeks burning entirely as he looked at you once again. You were gripping onto the blanket against you as if your life depended on it. Your belly was turning in nervousness as you looked for the following words.

“You moaned my name too, you aren’t all that innocent either!”

“I know I did. You think I’m ashamed of that? It was good.” His eyes were looking at you with an intensity you haven’t felt in a while, just like when Bil– You shook your head from that thought and cleared your throat.

“It was and– and uhm–” You didn’t know what you wanted. It was– He was the best you ever had, there was no lie in that. Better than those boys from school before Henry, better than Henry, better than your hookups and better than Billy… But– he was also part of the friend group. You two were in the same group of people and if something were to happen between the two of you– things like jealousy or one being mad at the other and then it’s just going to be back as it was a year ago.

You didn’t want to go back to that place. You didn’t want to lose Eddie again.

And Eddie noticed it as you looked down at the floor. The thoughts, the doubt, and he could not believe you were thinking about this. You two spent one of the greatest nights, and he knows you enjoyed as much as he did. He knows you���ve never experienced what you have with him, just as he experienced something completely new with you and his fists were clenching the sheets underneath him, feeling anger rising in his chest.

Your mind was trying to come up with the words but if you said you didn’t want to do this ever again, you would be lying. If you said you didn’t want to feel him again it would also be a lie. If you said you didn’t want to feel him inside of you, it would be a terrible horrible lie, the worst of them all because you never felt like that in your life.

But you wouldn’t lie if you said you are afraid of what this might do to your friendship if it were to keep going. What might do to all the improvement you two did the past six months. What might happen in between the entire group of friends you have if it were to all fall apart. What if they took sides? What if you two broke the entire group apart, even between eachother, because of some fun?

“I swear to god, Peach–” He began, already knowing you had come to a resolve. An answer that only angers him terribly knowing you felt as great as he did the night before. That you enjoyed doing to him the things you did just as much as he enjoyed eating you out like he never did before to any other woman in his life.

“We really shouldn’t…” You began, not daring to look at him. You wanted to stop talking, to jump on the bed and into his arms, kiss him again, fuck him, ride him like last night already even if you were sore all over, muscles in pain, but he just–

“Are you serious? After how we went at eachother last night? You’re telling me you don’t want to do this again?” His eyebrows were meeting in the middle, not even hiding the anger behind them. Your cheeks burnt once more as you cleared your throat, your eyes finding his again, your stomach flipping at the intensity of his gaze.

“I just– What happens if something goes… wrong? I mean–” You bit your bottom lip, looking for the right words as you looked at him. “-- I don’t want us to go back to where we were a year ago.”

He realized now with what you were conflicted about, and in all honesty, he never thought of it that way. He had thought of the consequences of fucking you and what could happen if you two fall apart because of it. With the two of you and with the group… But after last night, there is no way in fucking hell he cares for all of that now. 

“Why would something go wrong? What do you exactly mean by ‘wrong’?” He was still looking at your entire figure, and it was rendering you stupid again. Your breathing quickened at how much you felt him burn you with his gaze. Scanning you like a predator, waiting to pounce at any given opportunity.

“I–” It was embarrassing. What if he thought you had feelings for him? Like, romantic feelings. More than simple attraction… maybe– “-- What if one becomes possessive of the other? Like, it can happen. What if you see me with another person and you don’t like that? It would just–” 

And his fists clenched against the sheets as you mentioned that part. He knew where you were going with it, and he wasn’t very keen on the idea of sharing you, but it wasn’t unbearable. If sharing you was his only way of having you, then he would take it. He wondered though–

“And what about you seeing me with another woman?” He raised an eyebrow at you, and you looked at him with a dumbfounded face.

“Huh?”

“As far as I remember you were absolutely jealous last night.” You scoffed at his words, anger boiling as denial settled in your gut. You? What? Your arms left your chest in fury as you burnt all over.

“Jealous!? Me!? I wasn’t!” And you saw how his eyes traveled downwards, his head cocking to the side as he scanned you. You squinted at him, opening your mouth ready to cuss at him, wondering what the hell this man was looking at you, only to feel a breeze brush on your–

Your eyes widened as you snapped your head to look down and you gasped, yelping loudly as you bent down to grab the blanket again. You let it fall and he saw your naked body, in the full-on daylight that was coming through the curtains. Are you dumb!? Your hands grabbed onto the fabric and you stood up quickly, covering yourself only to look up to see a pair of eyes staring down at you.

And you didn’t know how fast he had been, because he was towering over you, standing.

He had quickly crawled to the edge of the bed and stood up before you the moment you picked up the blanket from the floor. Your eyes were wide, staring up at him with bewilderment in them, your heartbeat banging in your ears, threatening to pop your eardrum off. His eyes were hungry, his jaw was clenched, and– You didn’t dare to look down at him. You didn’t dare to look at the thing that had filled you to the brim the night before because if you did, you didn’t know what you would do.

“Then, what is your final answer Peach? We done here? One time thing, that’s it?” You didn’t know what you expected, but not this. He was asking if this was the last time, not really convincing you to say otherwise. Did you want to be convinced to let this continue? What were you expecting from him?

“I–” Your mouth went dry, not knowing what to respond, but your mind knew exactly what it needed to be said. This, even if your body craves it once more, you cannot allow it. He shouldn’t either. You had to tell him that it was done but your eyes drifted to his lips at the same time he did to yours. 

Will you be able to hold back from kissing him, knowing just how good it felt to do so? Will you be able to not look at him the way you have been doing for the past month? Will you be able to not think about how he fucked you speechless on those lonely nights of yours? You don’t know… You don’t want to know but–

“I’ll respect it. I’ll back off.” No. You don’t want him to back off. You don’t want him to stop, you don’t want to stop this, but you can’t let it happen. The group could be involved, the relationship you so craved of him would be destroyed if something were to happen. You closed your eyes as you swallowed harshly, to then look up at his eyes once more.

“It was just this one time… We were curious, and it’s– it’s done.”

You two stared one another down for a few seconds, and it was as if the both of you were expecting someone to break first. For one of you to grab the other’s face and kiss them stupid. You could feel his hot breath all over your face, even if he wasn’t that close. That’s just how hard he was breathing.

His jaw clenched once and then you saw him take a step away from you, turning and grabbing his boxers from the floor. You wanted to look. You really did but you couldn’t. You fucking couldn’t, so you turned your head the other way as you clutched the blanket to your chest. He put his boxers on and then stretched his back, looking at you once more.

“Well, then there’s that Peach. We’ll go back to how we were before all this… or well, try.” You were puzzled by those words, looking at him as you felt your heart clench in your chest.

“Try?” 

“Well yes. Give me a little bit of time to forget about your tits and pussy, hard to look at your face when I have that in my head.” He was so fucking bold for saying this, making your face just flare up, and you looked away for him not to notice. You swallowed a lump of, you don’t even know what, as you stared at his dresser to keep your mind occupied.

“I see.” You didn’t know what to say. He wants to forget about last night and that’s what you wanted right? So why does it hurt your fucking ego? Why does it make your heart clench? It shouldn’t.

“Right. Okay. Well, I’ll let you put your clothes back on and you can go home.” And you snapped your head to look at him only to see him walking out after grabbing his shirt and pants, closing the door behind him. Your mouth fell open in disbelief and you slowly sat down on the bed once again.

What was that? Why did he agree so easily? But you wanted that? What the fuck is wrong with you? Why do you feel like this? Why do you feel like you lost? Like you are making the wrong decision? It was just sex for fuck sake! There’s probably someone out there with Eddie’s same– same damn cock size! And– someone who can fuck you the way he did… someone who ate you out the way he did–

“Asshole.” You muttered through your teeth, not noticing you were showing them towards the door, a glare in your eyes. Fine, he wants to forget that night. He wants to forget you and your body. Perfectly fine, you’ll do the same. You’ll do the exact same, because this is how it should be. You made the right decision.

You did.

You’re enraged.

He really did not talk to you for the whole fucking week. You were basically back to how you two were a year ago, and you were hating it. You've gotten so used to talking to him everyday, sending funny memes to eachother, and just having fun, and now, it’s nonexistent.

But you sort of understood now what he meant about trying to forget… that. You understood because you can hardly stop thinking about it. You can hardly stop doubting yourself if your decision was the right one, debating the pros and cons about the situation. Of course the cons always won, it had to do with your friendship with him and the group, while the pros were… the pro was you could fuck him whenever you wanted.

You wanted to message him many times, but your dignity always won over as well as your respect for him to move away from you a bit to gather his thoughts once again. But fuck, you tried masturbating last night with the dildo you owned and– it just doesn’t satisfy you the way his cock did. You were enraged because Eddie Munson had ruined you for everyone else, or at least until you found someone that matches him in size and performance.

Robin doesn’t know and she will never know, and you hoped Eddie didn’t tell Steve. That was the last conversation you two had when you left his house, to keep this a secret. You couldn’t even accept his offer of him driving you home, preferring to just order a car to take you. You were awkward and nervous and you probably looked completely stupid, but can you be blamed?

You fucked your friend! You fucked someone you never thought you would fuck in your entire life! And you liked it– No, loved it and you wanted to do it again and again and again, but it just cannot be. You were also mad at yourself for wanting to do this again, despite knowing it was wrong. You hated that your body was already craving him desperately, wanting to feel him against you again, kiss you, fill you up and just turn you into a mess.

You wondered if Robin would kill you for it. She would probably be surprised and ask for details. You really need to stop thinking of him because tonight would be the first night you see him after literally riding him into oblivion and you have to pretend nothing ever happened between the two of you so your friends wouldn’t suspect anything at all.

How the fuck were you supposed to act normal?

Your doorbell rang and you looked at yourself in your full sized mirror again. A black simple strap dress with a black leather jacket on top. Hair done, makeup done, and some low heels. It was good enough and the air was starting to become warmer so, you were absolutely fine with a dress. 

You took a deep breath in and walked towards the door, opening it to reveal Steve, Robin and Jonathan holding their drinks up. You smiled, feeling the nerves invade your belly knowing he could come at any minute. The group decided to go out this saturday for Argyle’s birthday. He didn’t want to celebrate his birthday but you all invited Eden this time so he gratefully said yes. 

He decided on the club all of you were gonna go, and you could already guess it was going to be something different from the usual. Your eyes followed Steve as he entered the house with his boyfriend and roommate and you bit your bottom lip as your heart hammered in your chest. What if Eddie did tell him? Would he tell everyone?

You closed the door and you waited but no questions were asked and you didn’t notice Steve looking at you differently in any way. Same with Jonathan and thankfully Robin as well. He didn’t talk, which was good. 

“So…” Robin began and your blood went cold. Jonathan and Steve smirked at one another and– fuck, did they know? Did Eddie talk? You’re gonna kill him, you’re gonna fucking murder him. “You were glowing this week at work.”

“Huh?” You asked, trying to act innocent, trying to act like your blood didn’t just run cold in your veins just now.

“Robin told me you looked refreshed. What happened when we left Eddie’s house, hmm?” Steve asked and you felt like your breathing was cutting off. You had to lie, you had to make up a lie, anything.

“Nothing happened?” You busied yourself as you all stood in the kitchen, opening up the six packs of beer and putting them inside your fridge. Jonathan leaned on the wall next to it, arms crossed as he looked at you.

“Oh, something did happen.” Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Lie, you have to lie.

“Okay, fine… Something– happened.” You mumbled and you heard Robin gasp, and you turned around to see Robin covering her mouth and then Steve’s eyes were about to bulge out of its sockets.

“With Eddie?” His voice seemed strained, almost angry through the shock. You winced and frowned, shaking your head.

“What? No! He hooked me up with– with his friend Jeff!” 

Silence in the room. You gulped slowly as you looked at them, and then locked eyes with Robin. She was tilting her head in complete confusion as she stared at you. Her gaze fell on Steve who looked back at her and then you saw him sigh in relief.

Your shoulders fell down as you realized that it was indeed the right decision not to continue being friends with benefits with Eddie. By the looks of your friends, and especially Steve, you could see the fear behind the eyes. There was no happiness about it, or overall excitement for the two of you, just plain worry. Yeah, it was the better choice after all.

“You never told me you liked Jeff?” Robin looked at you once again and you shrugged, opening a beer for yourself.

“He looked nice that night and when you guys left he picked me up from Eddie’s and we went to a motel because he lives with Gareth.” You hoped they were buying your story because you would die if they didn’t.

“And?” Jonathan asked, holding onto your shoulder with a smirk on his face and you cleared your throat, took a sip of your beer and opened your mouth only for the doorbell to ring again and your heart stopped.

“I’ll get it! I want details so don’t start without me!” Robin yelled as she walked out of the kitchen and your blood drained your face. No, you cannot be this unlucky. You gulped as you took a bigger sip of your can and Steve was next to you, and if you squinted you could almost see a tail wag behind him.

“You never said anything! Like if it were someone random I don’t care, but Jeff? We know Jeff!” You rolled your eyes at him as you shook your head, feeling the nerves in your belly grow tenfold as you heard the door opening. You had to get out of this situation and fast.

“I would prefer to keep it to myself, I mean, like you said, it is someone you guys know–” And Jonathan rolled his eyes at you grabbing the rum and coke to start preparing his drink on your kitchen island.

“Oh please, just tell us if he was good and all that stuff.” You should have mentioned someone random from the party, someone they didn’t know. That’s why they’re fucking curious about it and you dug your own hole. You wanted to run away and not deal with this but then Robin marched back in with a smile to her face, Nancy holding her hand, Argyle, Eden and–

Fuck. He put his hair in a half ponytail just like you did that one time for him.

He was wearing a black button up linen shirt, open buttons at the top revealing his thin silver necklace. He was also wearing some worn out black colored pants, or jeans, you didn’t know, but fuck he looked good. Warm weather Eddie was going to fuck you over wasn’t he?

“Okay, continue!” Robin yelled as she sat on one of the stools, elbows on the counter and her chin on her hands with a smile on her face. Eddie’s eyes found yours and– shivers went down your spine as a flash of that night came to your mind. Him on top of you, moaning, thrusting in and out of you and you–

“Continue what?” Nancy snapped you out of your thoughts, making you look at her. Everyone was now waiting for you to continue and when you stuttered, not daring to look at Eddie, Jonathan talked for you.

“Robin said that since Eddie’s party, she–” and he made a nod at you making you wince”--has been in a special mood at work and now we found out why.” He wiggled his eyebrows at her and Nancy gasped, covering her mouth and her head snapped towards Eddie. His eyes were wide as he looked at you, a look that only asked one thing of you. ‘Did you tell them?’

Your mouth opened and closed as you looked at him and Argyle was looking in between the two of you while elbowing Eden to the side. You wanted to talk but Eddie was looking at you with anger or with confusion, you couldn’t really tell, but maybe it was both. You stuttered a bit but Steve was the one who interrupted this time, and you wanted the earth to swallow you whole.

“She just told us Jeff came to pick her up that night after we left.” He chuckled and looked at you while your eyes snapped to the wall on your side, not wanting to look at Eddie anymore. Your whole body and face was on fire as you wondered what his reaction was right now.

“Jeff…” By the sound of his voice he was starting to connect the dots together, and a dry chuckle escaped him, making you frown and turn your head to look back at him. “Yeah. Didn’t know he was that good, Peach. Special mood?” 

He was acting cocky now. A defiant look in his eyes and it reminded you of the Eddie of a year ago. Same look, same hateful gaze, arrogant, infuriating, making you want to walk over to him and strangle him until he couldn’t breathe anymore. 

But it was still enough to send shivers down your spine, making you move a bit in your place.

“It wasn’t that good.” Was your short reply, biting the inside of your left cheek and you just now noticed that she had been preparing drinks for everyone.

“Really?” Robin asked while looking at you as she took a sip of her drink. Your mouth opened to answer only for the motherfucker to interrupt you once again, while walking towards you, his hand reaching next to you to open the fridge and take a beer out.

“Hmm, is that why Jeff agreed that it was a one time thing? Maybe the one that wasn’t good…” and he looked at you, glares being exchanged, your heart beating into your chest as you looked at him and you saw his nostrils flare slightly as he continued, “-- was you, little Peach.” 

He slammed the door closed and you hissed at him, the sound startling you, but your anger was rising up, not being able to stop it as you fully faced him. Who does he think he is? Why does he feel that fucking entitled to treat you like this again?

“Slam my fridge one more fucking time Munson.” He cocked his head at you and Steve’s smile fell, immediately stepping in between you two, making you take a step back as well as Eddie, your eyes never leaving his, as he glared down at you.

“Okay, let’s not get too personal here…” Your breathing was deep, face burning with anger now, not knowing how to feel about this whole situation. Why was he acting so badly? He was the one who didn’t want to speak to you for a whole week, and he comes to your house and acts like a child?

“I was just protecting my friend Harrington. That’s all.” Eddie responded and took a sip of his beer before turning away from you. Your heart clenched at that, not really knowing why. You wanted to do something but you were not quite sure what. Just do something to him. But what?

You sighed as you looked at Robin who was looking back and forth to you and Eddie, while the other gave you one last look before turning to go to the living room, or to your balcony. You know Robin is worried, and you are too. Your heart clenched once more, feeling a pang of anxiety in the pit of your stomach.

All you wanted was to avoid this treatment. You wanted to avoid going back to the old ways Eddie and you treated eachother, yet you are still back into it. It was wrong to sleep with him. It was so wrong because now your friendship might be over thanks to ego, to pride, and you felt like crying. 

God, you knew he had become a close friend, almost a best friend you could say, and now realizing you fucked it all up for one night just made you want to hit yourself in the face. You wondered if he had the same thoughts or worries in his head. If he also didn’t like this situation at all.

But even with all these feelings, as you walked out with everyone else from the kitchen, and you looked towards the balcony, you couldn’t help but look at his broad back as smoke left his mouth while looking at his phone–

Wait, why is he looking at his phone? Is he– Nope, you are not doing this. You are not. You are going to pretend the knot in your stomach is not there, because, why the fuck would you care if Eddie was talking to someone? He can! He is free to do so, and maybe one of his hookups will be at the club you were all gonna go and he was just securing a fucking pussy. Yes, and he has all the right.

Yet, you couldn’t help but rush towards your table to grab your cellphone and turn away so no one could peek at your phone. You opened Instagram and saw Eddie had posted a story, right before he arrived. Your heart beat wildly in your chest and your finger clicked on his picture, only for the story to pop up and–

You let out a sigh of relief, very quietly, as you saw it was a goofy picture of him, Nancy, Argyle, and Eden in the mirror of your elevator. Wait, why are you relieved? If he wanted to post a shirtless picture on the mirror he could. It would probably score him some girl tonight for him to fuck, and he has all the right to do so because he wanted to forget about your body. And, did he say you weren’t good?

He fucking did. Anger bubbled up in your chest and you turned to see him in the balcony still, and you saw everyone else minding their own business, so you walked towards the sliding doors and stepped out, closing them behind you. Eddie looked over his shoulder and a dry huff escaped him before putting the cigarette on his lips again and taking a big puff.

“So, Jeff, huh.” He mumbled as he let the smoke out and your eyebrow twitched as you walked closer, standing next to him.

“You wanted me to tell the truth? I didn’t know Robin had been talking behind my back about how I–” Oh you chose your words wrong. A smirk broke on his lips, turning to face you with a piercing gaze, making you straighten up in your place.

“How you…? How you were glowing the whole week as Steve said? Or probably how satisfied you looked after riding my dick?” You gasped at how straightforward he was being. Didn’t he need the space to forget any kind of thoughts regarding that night? Thoughts about you? You cleared your throat and looked away, into the horizon, avoiding his eyes completely.

“Don’t give yourself so much credit. I bet you were also in a fucking great mood this week, let’s not forget how ‘I took you so well.’” You heard a groan from him and you turned your head to look at him with a frown and he was looking at you with those sharp eyes, jaw clenched and his free hand clenching onto the rail of the balcony.

“Now it is you who is giving herself way too much fucking credit.”

“I’m literally treating you the same way you are treating me. I didn’t know you would become a fucking asshole again after I said no!” You tried to keep your voice low, but high enough for him to know you were angry. He scoffed and shook his head, taking another puff of his cigarette before he continued talking.

“Don’t you fucking remember? I can read people like the back of my hand, and that is why I’m so goddamned angry at you.” Your mouth fell open as your body burnt from… anger? You didn’t know anymore. You just felt restless, and you felt like he could see right through you at the moment. Could he see how there is a part of you that regrets telling him no? That you want to kiss him again? That you want to feel him again? Can he see all of that?

“Stop with that bullshit Eddie. Did I crush your fucking ego? Is that the issue here?” You scoffed and you saw him clench his jaw as he straightened up, chuckling under his breath. There was tension between you, both are hunters ready to pounce, there’s no small and defenseless prey here. You’re both baring your teeth out at eachother to see who breaks first.

“You’re really up on that stupid high horse, aren’t you Peach?” His voice was rough, trying his best to probably sound cruel, but all you wanted was to pull him to your lips. You really need to fucking stop. “You started the insult, and I finished it.”

“I didn’t start shit! You made fun of my lie–”

“You know what, let’s just–” He closed his eyes for a second and took a deep breath to then exhale, looking down at you. “-- let’s just move on from this. You slept with Jeff last saturday, that’s the lie, let’s stick to it.”

“Yes, and he had a good time with me as well, even if he wants to fucking deny it just because I don’t want to do it again.” He was containing his own anger inside and you know it. He bit his bottom lip as he gave small nods while his nose flared up. He was pissed. Absolutely pissed. You were being a fucking hypocrite, and a liar.

“Believe what you want. In the end, you seem to be the one who looked refreshed this week.” You frowned at that, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Oh, and you didn’t?”

“Nope. I actually wasn’t refreshed. Hopefully, I can change that tonight.” You frowned in confusion as you turned to look at how he put out his cigarette on the ashtray. What did he mean? You felt nervousness as he looked at you one more time. Without saying another word he opened the sliding door and stepped inside. You stood there, processing what had just happened, wondering what he truly meant. 

Was he going to try to make a move on you tonight? The tension is there, the bantering is there and you should be disgusted or afraid of him making a move but why do you feel… elated? You feel happy or giddy from knowing that he is angry yet he might come onto you again.

Should you put condoms in your bag? Maybe, it doesn’t really hurt, but– no, no. You are not fucking him again. This is final. The group reacted badly when they suspected it was Eddie, which he was, but then they sighed with relief when they ‘knew’ it wasn’t. You sighed yourself as you held onto the rail and looked out into the city.

This really wasn’t supposed to be like this, but you can’t deny you are attracted to Eddie. More than any hookup you had before. It’s like you tried him once and it was enough to make you addicted. Nobody made you feel that way… well… except–

No time to think about that. No time to think about anything. You have to go back to being friends with Eddie. You can’t be salty or angry at one another because this little adventure happened between the two of you. You don’t want to lose Eddie, and you were trying to avoid it, but in the end, it didn’t matter, because it feels like you are losing him either way.

So you took a deep breath in and walked back into the living room, not wanting to look Eddie’s way but it was like you were magnetized to him. You tried focusing on getting to know Eden, and she was really cool, very Argyle in all the good sense. She was the perfect match for him, and her alternative clothes were a contrast to Argyle’s vibrant ones. It was cute.

You were on your second beer now, minutes had passed, almost an hour, and you didn’t want to drink anymore. Eddie has not been interacting or looking your way, and you are restless for some reason. Didn’t he say– No, if he does try something the answer is no. 

Even when you two were left alone in the kitchen for a whole minute, you didn’t share any words as you cleaned up to finally go to the club. You kept glancing at him, but he pretended you were non existent. Your heart ached at how he was treating you because before anything happened he was your friend first, and now you also lost that.

You opened your mouth to talk to him, tell him you didn’t mean what you said, just something for him to finally talk to you the way he always did, but you were interrupted when Jonathan came into the kitchen.

“Welp, you guys ready?” He was sober, being the designated driver this time. Eddie only drank one beer and he stopped because he was going to take the people that came with him home as well. You nodded as you closed the trash bag and walked out the kitchen. 

“Is everything okay between you and Eddie?” Robin asked worriedly. You didn’t really know what to tell her. Everyone for sure noticed the cold shoulders between the both of you, or how you talked to one another before. They weren’t blind, nor deaf.

“Um we– It seems that my comment towards Jeff didn’t sit right with him. And then he insulted me back so–”

“But I saw you two talking outside?” She asked with a small slur on her tongue. You sighed and rubbed her shoulder.

“Yeah, I am not saying sorry and he isn’t either.” Robin rolled her eyes at the two of you, knowing how childish that sounded.

“So, is everyone ready to go celebrate the great Argyle’s birthday?” Steve said a little too loud and you smiled weakly at his state of drunkenness. You heard Eddie laugh at him and your stomach flipped at the sound. This stupid crush towards your friend should be gone by now. It should, you already killed that curiosity, you know how it feels, you know how he does, it should be done.

“Let’s go amigos! You’re gonna like this club!” Eden cheered at her boyfriend as you remembered your purse, walking to your room to get it. This was going to be an outing with friends, so you should act like it. You will try to do some innocent talk with Eddie, maybe things flow naturally between the two of you again if you try.

Maybe.

Or maybe fucking not.

He is avoiding you like the plague. Argyle brought you all to a club that plays Latin music mostly, so it was easy for all of you to just stand around a table, drinking as you talked, laughing when Argyle did a shot of Jagermeister and almost spit it out, but his girlfriend took it like a champ. 

Steve and Robin were drunk, as always. Jonathan was sober trying to fix Steve’s hair while the other tried kissing his boyfriend, and Nancy was giddy, just hugging Robin from behind, and then Eddie… Eddie and you were sober. He was across from you, when a week ago he probably preferred to stand next to you, knowing the two of you were the single people in the group. You both shared that in common, and now you are separated while the couples around you were all over eachother.

You wanted to go dance, to distract yourself from it all, but no one was making any moves to do so. You turned around to look into the dancefloor, and the women were dancing sensually, exotic even, and then, a dark haired girl walked in front of you, her dress glistening from the lights in the club. You were mesmerized by her, not even hiding the fact you were looking at her, but she noticed, looking back at you.

She was really beautiful, and then she winked at you while walking away. Oh… That should have gotten you to make a move. To go after her, but– Fuck, why don’t you feel like going after her? You sighed, turning around to take a small sip of your glass of water only to find a pair of eyes, digging into your skull.

He was glaring your way, and you wondered if it was his ego once more. You got flirted at and he hadn’t. That’s all it was. You rolled your eyes at him and grabbed your glass, turning back around to avoid looking at him again. You felt your heart accelerating as you tried to think of ways to not think about him at all.

But the more you pondered, the more you realized that you didn’t go after that girl because– Fuck, you can’t, you can’t want him! It’s wrong, it’s wrong, it’s wrong. The two beers you had probably were enough to make you this stupid. You had to go dance with someone, or get away from Eddie, but you didn’t have to. Eddie was heading to the dancefloor with Steve and Argyle, the two drunks. You only guessed he was going as a chaperone for them.

But what if someone–

You looked at Eden and smiled, nodding towards the dancefloor to join the boys. She smiled back at you, linked her arm around yours, and dragged you to the middle where the guys were. You just wanted to dance, that’s the whole reason you came to dance with them. Steve immediately grabbed you and twirled you around, making you giggle at how he almost stepped all over your feet.

“I don’t know how to dance any of this shit, but I sure as hell will try!” You heard him yell and you shook your head at him, only to then be pushed on your back, making you stumble over. You gasped and tried to grab onto anyone. A pair of arms wrapped around you before you tumbled to the floor, and your face was pressed to a chest, the leather like cologne filling your nostrils, making your heart thump faster.

“Watch the fuck out!” You heard Eddie yell over the music, and then you felt as if he shoved someone. You wanted to remain here, in his arms, and then– memories of that night started coming to your mind. You felt yourself burning all over, and particularly downwards. Fuck– 

“God, there was enough space for him to go through!” You heard Eden complain and then you were being pushed away, gently, the arms unwrapping from your body. You looked up to see those brown irises looking back at you, reminding you of that time where he supposedly hated you, yet still defended you from an asshole.

You don’t want this to be like that time, where he felt obligated to act heroic. He didn’t hate you now, did he? It’s just a rough patch in your relationship and you have to get over it. His hand squeezed your right shoulder and you felt shivers running down your entire spine.

“You alright?” His voice was loud but he wasn’t screaming. You gulped and nodded, feeling cold when the hand retracted. How long will it have to be for you to at least feel Eddie’s embrace again? A hug. Anything… but–

“Thanks…” You muttered under your breath. He gave a single nod, looking back at Argyle who was now trying to twerk to a song, and all you could do is stare at his side profile. 

Stop. Stop. Stop. You can’t fuck him again.

He said you were jealous, and you weren’t! You were curious only! You just wanted to know if he kept hookups as friends later on. Was that so bad? Was it bad to be curious about what a friend does in their life? In their relationships? No, it isn’t. You know everything about Robin, and you just wanted to have the same level of knowledge on Eddie.

You weren’t fucking jealous. You didn’t like him that way even, it was just attraction, so how could you be jealous over someone you just like physically?

“I’m off to get water.” You heard him talk, and you saw him walk away, and now you didn’t want to dance anymore. You bit your bottom lip as you stared at him until he got lost in the crowd. You wanted to follow him and talk to him, but you couldn’t. Maybe tomorrow, because right now it is for certain he doesn’t want to talk to you at all. 

“C’mon brochacha, dance with me! I’m the birthday boy!” You giggled at Argyle and he was right. You weren’t enjoying your friend’s birthday because of these stupid thoughts. Because of Eddie. You tried to calm your heart and dance with him, laughing when he tried to show you and Steve how to dance this music, and Steve just failed miserably.

You were laughing, songs passing and your worries started to leave your mind. Jonathan, Robin and Nancy joined after, but no sign of Eddie. It didn’t matter, because you were laughing as you were twirled around by Nancy. The music was not something the lot of you listened daily, but at least they were very well known songs.

Your bladder suddenly yelled at you for release. You have been holding it in for thirty minutes already, and you had to rush to the bathroom. You leaned over to Eden to yell to her over the music and into her ear so she could hear you.

“Where’s the bathroom!?”

“Next to the left side of the bar!” You nodded and gave her a thumbs up. You told everyone you were going to the bathroom and you started swimming through the sea of people. You avoided a few men that tried grabbing your hand in order to dance with you, rolling your eyes at the insistence. You finally stepped out of the dancefloor and saw the bathroom sign over the entrance of a hallway, but as you walked towards it, your head turned to the left only for your face to completely fall.

Eddie was leaning against the bar counter, smiling down at a girl. Both of them with drinks in their hands. Didn’t he say he was getting water? When did that change to alcohol? And how did he get to flirt with a girl this quickly? Your mouth was dry as you felt your belly turning, feeling your ego being crushed for some fucking reason. 

You turned and walked down the hallway, your knees feeling like jelly. You rushed to get inside the lady’s room and into a stall. You could hear all the girls talk but all you could think about was Eddie’s flirtatious smile towards this stranger. You should feel happy for him, like, good for him for getting some.

You relieved yourself, knees hurting from having to hold yourself up from not touching the toilet seat, and you walked to wash your hands, looking at your reflection as foam appeared on your palms. Your heart was hammering in your chest, and why– why are you thinking like this?

You feel sick. Maybe you are sick. You felt like you wanted to puke, your stomach was turning and your throat was closing up on you. Everything was spinning and you felt dizzy, and angry, and like your dignity was fucking squashed into the floor. At least he shouldn’t flirt with her in your face? You didn’t flirt with that girl before, and he is just–

What the fuck are you thinking? He is nothing to you and you are nothing to him, so why are you thinking like this? You really do feel sick don’t you? You need to go home, but everyone wants to stay most likely, so who on earth can take you home? Maybe just order a car?

Meanwhile, Eddie was outside, in the bar, having the most boring conversation there is with a girl that started talking to him out of nowhere. He was really going to get water, but maybe this was a good opportunity to try to go back to who he was before having a taste of you.

She wasn’t exactly his type, but she was very pretty. She just seemed the typical airhead who laughs at whatever he says for his attention, the hand trick on his arm, the lip biting. Nothing like you flirted with him. It was subtle and you didn’t even know you were doing it, thinking it was simple bantering.

That’s what it was at first, and now you two are back to how you were months ago. He didn’t want to treat you the way he did, but he was angry. He knew you wanted him as much as he wanted you, and he understood you. He really did understand your point of view, and why you were so afraid, but fuck did he want you again. He knows the woman in front of him won’t satisfy him, but if he isn’t going to be able to have you, then he should just refresh his contact list. 

“And then, we just like, drank a whole keg and it was insane.” Her voice was nasal, and her topic of conversation revolved around her solely. He faked a smirk, and he was already told that Argyle and Eden were heading to a motel after this. He didn’t need to know, but that leaves him with no passengers because he knows Nancy is leaving with Robin. So… he can easily take this girl back to his place.

He has to start trying to not think about your body because that’s all he did this past week. Seeing you tonight, in that dress, just made him want to grab you and take you to your room and just bend you over on all fours on your desk and rail into you, over and over again. Make you scream the way you did a week ago. But he can’t do that. 

So, taking this girl back to his place is. He opened his mouth to talk to her only to be interrupted by a tap on his shoulder. He turned his head, frowning in surprise as he saw you standing next to him. You were nervous, and you were a bit shaky from what he could see. He felt his stomach do a stupid twirl, and he wondered if something happened to you.

“Hi, sorry to interrupt um– I– I feel sick…” Now he was confused. His head tilted to the side in question, an eyebrow rising as he looked at you. You felt sick?

“Um… Alright Peach, go tell Jonathan.” Eddie was trying to understand why you were interrupting him, but he didn’t have to wonder for long.

“You promised me you were my ride tonight… Plus they don’t seem like they want to go…” Oh. Oh you were a fucking bitch. He didn’t make such a promise and you knew it. You saw him flirting with someone else, and just like he predicted, you became jealous, to the point of interrupting him. 

“Right. You feel sick and you want to leave now, is that correct?” Your jaw clenched while looking up at him with those glossy eyes of yours. You slowly nodded at him and he had to gather his thoughts for a second, his heart thumping in his chest in excitement. He didn’t plan this at all, he really was going to respect your choice even if you were lying and he didn’t like it either.

“Aww, but I was having fun.” The girl in front of him pouted and fuck, he already forgot her name. The adrenaline of leaving with you overtaking him completely, excited to feel you around him again, hopeful to feel you cum around his cock and yell his name like seven days ago.

“I’m sorry baby, but I did promise her I was her ride for tonight.” He side-eyed you for a moment, and you were fiddling with your fingers while looking away. He wondered what you were thinking right now. 

“Can I at least have your instagram? Snapchat?” His eyes turned to look at the girl in front of him again, and he chuckled, shaking his head.

“Sorry, I don’t own social media.” And before she could ask for his number, his arm wrapped around your shoulders, turning you towards the entrance of the club, making sure you didn’t bump into anyone. He felt you tense up under his touch, or shiver, but it filled him with pride knowing he was making you feel this way just by touching your shoulder.

Once you two were out, he let go of your shoulders and he saw you looking back at the club, and then continued walking next to him. He didn’t see you drink, just at your home and those two beers. He knows you are not drunk, and you did whatever you did back there completely conscious. 

The car was not far away, and there were no words exchanged by the two of you. His heart was beating loudly, hearing his blood flowing, already feeling his belly burn with need. He couldn’t believe how primal he became when you were next to him now. You were a fucking drug. 

He opened the passenger’s seat for you and you looked at him as you slowly got inside, your eyes never breaking contact with one another’s. He felt his hands itching to touch you, knowing he is a few minutes away to actually get to touch you the way he did a week ago. He closed the door and while rounding the car, he messaged Argyle and Nancy to tell them he is taking you home because you were really sick.

He wondered if they were going to buy that lie. He honestly didn’t actually care, not when his stomach turned with adrenaline at the thought of eating you out again, or feel you cum around his cock, very tight at the base, bottoming out completely inside of you. He got into the driver’s seat and he saw you were texting, probably Jonathan since he was the sober one. 

But, he didn’t see excitement in your face. He could detect hints of doubt, of worry, embarrassment? He was about to talk when your phone started ringing, your eyes frowning in confusion and answering it.

“Hello?” You asked and motioned for him to start driving. He started the car and he got out of the parking space to start driving… to your house? His? “Robin, you are drunk– I’m– Yeah, I’m fine! Eddie is taking me home.” 

To your house it is, okay. He leaned over to talk over the phone so that Robin could hear him talk, knowing she won’t remember shit from this night.

“We’re gonna go have sex with eachother Robin!” He felt you push his shoulder, and he could hear how Robin went ‘That’s impossible!’ and he snorted as he kept his eyes on the road. You cursed under your breath as you got on the phone with Robin again.

“He– Of course he lied, god Robin– Yes, I do feel sick… Uh huh.” You closed your eyes, head thumping on the headrest of your seat as you kept listening to your friend. He fixed himself on his own because– for some reason, there was anger bubbling inside of him, and he was hoping his intuition was wrong. “Yeah, I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Bye.”

He saw you hang up and sigh, putting the phone into your purse again. Should he ask? Should he just drive to your place without a word? He was never in this position and now he is realizing just how different it is to fuck a stranger from a friend.

“So… sick huh.” He started and you gulped, staring out your window.

“Y-Yeah… I’m honestly feeling icky. Nauseous and stuff.” And he frowned, his gut already turning with a bad feeling, an awful taste in his mouth at your words. Were you serious? No, he definitely knows you are lying.

“Wait, you’re actually sick?” 

“Yeah, I was– in the bathroom trying not to puke before talking to you.” And– Oh he was pissed.

“You– Oh my fucking god!” His foot stepped on the gas, and his speed raised a bit more as he turned left, completely getting off the route to your house. You gasped as you held onto the handle above the window, and he knew you were a bit afraid, but he wanted to murder you right now.

“What the fuck Munson! Take me home!” You could see how the buildings started becoming smaller, then houses–

“No, you and I are going to have a fucking talk, Peach.” He gave you an unamused laugh as you saw the trees coming closer, your stomach turning wildly from nerves, of anger, of excitement? You are not sure anymore. You didn’t do anything wrong. You truly felt sick, you could feel it.

“We don’t have to talk about anything! I just need to get home to rest–” You hear him groan loudly at your response and he turns onto a dirt road, making the car swing around as he gets deeper into the trees around you. You knew there was some kind of countryside outside of the city, but not with trees. It looks more like an ecological park than anything.

Suddenly he comes to a stop, both of you jerking forward, stopped by your seatbelts. Your heart was pounding wildly in your chest as you looked at him, wide-eyed. He turned off the headlights, leaving your surroundings in complete darkness, and the only thing illuminating the inside of his car was the small navigating screen in the middle.

“You are a fucking bitch, you know that?” His voice was low as he almost ripped the seatbelt off of him, running a hand over his face. He couldn’t really believe what you just did, and the fact you are denying it is bringing back all those old feelings he had for you again. How much he hated seeing you lie over and over again in front of Robin. Lying about who you were. But this time, this involves him, and you are lying into his face and even fucking his night over.

“Excuse me? What the hell is your problem!?” You were angry at him because he basically kidnapped you, taking you far away from the city and your friends, and all you wanted was to get home and curl up in your bed. Didn’t you?

“My problem? Oh, I don’t know, the fact I was about to score a fuck for tonight until you showed up and demanded me to take you home, LYING that I promised to be your drive back, when we both know I didn’t agree to shit!” He was looking at you, both of your chests going up and down with heavy breaths. You felt your belly dropping lower and lower, the consequences of your actions now coming clean in front of your face, but you won’t admit that to him.

“I– I had to do it because no one wanted to leave! That’s that!” 

“And your best option was to lie to me, when you knew I was actually busy? You’re full of fucking bullshit and you know I know it.” His eyes were like daggers into your skull, your soul, your heart. He could see you and he could feel your lies and your tricks. It’s not that you didn’t want him to be with someone else, you just felt sick at the moment, that’s all.

“I felt sick! I really did!” You squealed out, making him huff as he let out a fake chuckle, shaking his head.

“Yeah, sick because I was going to stick my dick in someone else’s cunt and not yours.” Your whole stomach, intestines, and lungs made a turn, knocking the air out of you in an instant. How dare he? How fucking dare he say that about you when it was nothing like that?

It wasn’t.

“I– The world doesn’t revolve around you Munson! Why would I care about something like that? The fuck you think you are? The best I’ve ever had or some shit?” You wanted to scoff at that because you were lying. You were fucking lying but you cannot admit it to him. His face turned to you, a glare directed into your soul and you felt a shiver run down your whole body.

“I fucking know I am the best you’ve ever had. And I know you are regretting saying it was a one-time thing.” 

Your body was set aflame at that, and you knew you were becoming aroused each second that passed. You were aroused at the bantering? Were you for real? You couldn’t do this, you had to get home because you were feeling your body tremble with adrenaline as your stomach did somersaults. 

“You’re so fucking full of yourself, you know that?” He was angry, you could see it in the way his jaw clenched and unclenched, how he was looking at you with murderous eyes, and you didn’t really have a way to defend yourself at this point but just keet arguing with him.

“Me? Fine princess. I’ll just pretend you admitted you regretted your fucking choices and so you ruined my night.” You were fuming, thighs rubbing together as your impulsiveness started to get hold of you. Your hands were restless as you looked at him, whole body flushed and burning from inside out.

“Admit!? I didn’t admit shit, and it wasn’t like that! Why can’t you just accept that!?” Your voices were loud, and you were glad no one was around you, at least nowhere close.

“Because you’re a fucking liar Peach!” His whole body was turned to you and you felt your heart hammering in your chest, blood pumping in your ears and your breath was heavy and elaborated. Your eyes were scanning his eyes, his lips as they moved, the vein on his neck, his hand as he flayed it around when he talked.

“Why the fuck would I lie about something like that!?” You gritted out of your teeth and you could feel the tension inside the car, how the air became heavy, two predators waiting for one to pounce onto the other. You dug your nails into your thighs as he rolled his eyes at you, a final scoff out of his lips.

“The sooner you admit it, the sooner we can get this over with and fuck eachother stupid, because I know you want that as much as I do.” Your mouth fell open at that, jaw dropping to your thighs almost. Your hands gripped onto your seatbelt that was still tight on you, glaring at him with sharp eyes.

“No, I do not.” He lets out a chuckle at that, shaking his head and then giving you one nod as his tongue licks on his bottom lip, trying to contain himself, his eyes looking forward and out of the windshield.

“Alright, then it’s done. I’ll take you home and I’ll go back to the club.” Your heart hammered in your chest because, why? It’s already late, he wouldn’t be able to get in. Would he? You felt your entire skin burning, your fingertips up in flames as well as your cheeks. Your body trembled and you couldn’t pinpoint why. It felt like a mixture of things, adrenaline, excitement, euphoria, anger, and– your ego being squashed.

That is all it fucking was. Your pride being destroyed right on your face. Why do you feel like this when you were the one who made the decision? He wanted to keep doing it but you refused and– You didn’t want him to fuck another girl, at least not in front of you.

Because you know you were the best he ever had.

You unbuckled your seatbelt, the noise of it making Eddie turn to look at you, your body immediately reaching for him over the console. You heard him take a sharp intake of breath, as if in a hiss, meeting you in the middle, the both of you breathing heavily, desperate for one another. Your hands grasped his face, his left hand moving to your waist, right hand on the back of your neck, and you two gave one another one final look, before closing your eyes and hungrily taking eachother’s lips.

You kissed him with the purpose of taking his breath away. You wanted to leave no air at all in his lungs as the lip smacking could be heard inside the car, loudly so. Your fingernails went into his scalp, earning a groan from his part. You wanted to die from embarrassment because you realized how desperate you were to separate your thighs for him, so you rubbed them together as his hand on your waist gripped even harder, his fingertips digging into the fabric of your dress.

Your heads turned from side to side as the kiss grew more fierce, rougher, and sloppier. You wanted to feel him again, rub yourself on him, get him inside of you as quickly as possible. You don’t even know if you have the strength to go to his or your house at this point, the need being too unbearable. 

You moaned into his mouth when his hand moved downwards, gripping your ass and you felt a sweat moving all over your body, drenching you from how hot the car felt. How hot you felt. He chuckled into the kiss at your moan which earned him a tug on his hair from your part. He growled into his throat and his hand left your ass. You wanted to whine at the loss of touch, but then he pulled away, making the both of you look at one another, and then, his seat went all the way backwards, away from the steering wheel, his left hand on the lever underneath his seat.

You didn’t hesitate, not a single second, your breathing heavy as you moved quickly over the console, not caring if you were flashing him at all, you just needed to sit down on the bulge you could clearly see on his pants. Feel him once more because who were you going to lie to right now? Lie about how you didn’t think of messaging him all week and tell him to fuck what you said before? Lie about how you were close to visiting him at his shop and probably suck his cock under his desk?

Yeah, whatever friendship you had with Eddie, it’s gone.

Your knees were against the leather seat, one on each side of his hips and your hands cradled his face once again, leaning down to kiss his lips just like seconds before. Your head was bumping slightly against the roof of the car but you didn’t care. It will be a bit uncomfortable but it’s not something you really care for right now.

His right hand gripped the lever on the side to lean the back of his seat downwards, just slightly, not all the way. You didn’t stop kissing him for a second, and then your hips collided with his and he couldn’t help but moan into the kiss, almost a whimper, which you reciprocated with a moan of your own. You could feel him through your wet underwear, rubbing deliciously against you and the zipper’s fly of his pants catching onto your aching clit. 

Your hips were rubbing against him aggressively, not caring if he noticed how desperate you were because, by how his hands started gripping your waist, and by how his own hips swayed on the seat back and forth with you tells you he was in the exact same situation as you were. 

Eddie grunted into the kiss as he felt his dick become harder, twitch at every movement, and he was probably leaking a lot of precum already. This whole week had been torturous for him, not being able to get you out of his head and no matter how many times he jerked off and dedicated his cum to your name, it wasn’t enough. 

And right now, this wasn’t what he had planned. He had planned to meet a chick at the club to take home and try to satiate himself with her, even if he knew damn well it wasn’t going to work out, he still wanted to try. He didn’t expect your jealousy, or whatever it is called because the two of you do not like eachother, not in that way.

This was just physical attraction.

He knew he was territorial. He had his reasons to, but you, you were a mystery to him. Maybe it was your ego, your pride, and it probably really was. Maybe if you weren’t there and you found out later, you wouldn’t have cared. Would he care if he found out about you sleeping with someone else? Missing a night out and to find out you went out and fucked some guy or girl–

The thought made his mind spin, his right hand flying up to grip the back of your head, yanking onto your hair so you would open your mouth. A gasp escaped you, your lips parting over his, and he took this opportunity to slide his tongue in your mouth in order to meet yours. Your moans filled his throat and he felt as if he came back to life once more after the fucking week he had.

Your hands, now clawed onto his shoulders, nails digging into the stupid shirt he is wearing that looks way too good on him and you want to see it in complete shreds. Your hips started circling onto him, and you moaned into his mouth as your clit was rubbed on, your cunt just getting wetter at each roll. His hips were jerking upwards, his need to be inside of you growing each second.

You were pathetically clenching around nothing. Fuck, he felt too good, and you were so stupid for saying that it should have been a one-time thing only, and he is not even inside you yet. His dick is still inside his pants and you already felt cockdrunk on him, but it feels too good to stop. You could already feel the coil in your belly turning, finally pleased to have what it has been craving for.

His tongue was greedily licking onto yours, tasting you and devouring you, eating you whole. He wanted to eat you out again, have your pussy in his mouth, and make you crumble under his touch, but it seems there is going to be another time after this. Your hands went down his chest, and your breaths were heavy against eachother, and he couldn’t help but feel… victorious. He gripped your hair in order to pull away from you, keeping his lips close to yours and he smirked when a whimper fell from your pouted and puffy lips.

“One time thing my fucking ass, right Peach?” Your eyes were glistening with lustful tears, and you glared at him, grunting at his cockiness. You responded by rolling your hips against his, making him choke on his breath.

“Shut the fuck up Munson, my pussy drove you so mad that you didn’t think rationally at all. One of us had to be the voice of reason, and it wasn’t going to be you.” At your response, his eyes looked at you with a murderous stare, and his nostrils were flaring up at you, showing how pissed off your comment made him. 

But you were right on that.

He wanted you so bad that he didn’t want to see how it would affect the entire group and not just the two of you. He wanted to be inside of you again so bad that he was willing to risk it all. He wanted you again. He needed you again. But you are never going to hear that coming from his mouth.

“You say that, yet I had the intention of taking someone home tonight, and trust me Peach, you weren’t a choice.” And now it was your turn to glare into his eyes because, how fucking dare he? How dare he say something like that to you? Why does that hurt you? Why do you feel so angry? Why does it feel like he just carved a hole somewhere in your body?

Your hand flew to grip his chin, tilting his head back as his hand let go of your hair, letting you dive into his neck and biting him. It wasn’t that harsh, but it was enough to sink your teeth in if just a little bit. He winced, clenching his eyes as he felt his whole body tremble at the sensation. You were marking him up. Fuck, if only you knew what it was doing to him.

His dick twitched in his pants, making him groan in pain at how much pressure was being put onto him, your relentless rubbing against him making it all worse. His breathing was shaky, your tongue now lapping at the part where you had bitten. You proceeded to kiss him there, the burning in your belly becoming even more unbearable. 

You pulled away from him with a pop, trying to not hit the roof of the car with your head, and his hands gripped onto your jacket, pulling it down your shoulders and you helped him with taking it off. His mouth latched onto your neck this time, and you sat down on his thighs as you sighed in delight at his kisses. He knew he couldn’t mark you now, it would be too obvious since he probably has your fucking teeth engraved in his neck right now. 

Your hands went to his pants, and you thanked the heavens he didn’t wear a belt today. It was just a matter of seconds before you had unbuttoned him and pulled the fly of his zipper down. You were so close, and then– he pulled away.

“Shit, fuck–”

“What is it?” You were infuriated. Why was he stopping? Why was he stopping you now?

“I don’t have a condom sweetheart, and as much as I would love to fuck you raw, who knows what dick’s been in there.” That earned him a bite to his bottom lip this time, making him whimper against you. Fuck. This was another side of you that he never expected. He loved it. No one ever treated him like this, as if he was owned, as if he should know his place. This was new. You were new.

“I’m more worried about where your dick’s been. I have condoms in my purse.” And that earned you a smirk from him, his bottom lip now red and pulsing from your bite. 

“So, you came prepared.”

“And who says you were a choice?” At that, Eddie only leans in towards you, and you could see him inhaling, how his pupils dilated even more for just a second, and then focused on your face once again. 

“Oh baby, I know I was your only choice.” His and your eyes were locked on one another, fire and sparks flying between the two of you. Your jaw clenched, looking at the purse sitting on the passenger’s seat and then back at him.

“You’re gonna put it on or not?” And his hand flew to reach your purse, without taking his eyes off you. He hands it to you and you take just one second to stick your hand in and then into the small side pocket to take the condom out. You could see your phone lighting up from the movement, and that you had notifications, more than thirty minutes passed since you left the club. It can wait.

He threw the purse back to the side, and you raised yourself a bit from his thighs as you opened the condom with your teeth. He was mesmerized by you, not being able to take his eyes off you as he raised his hips to push his pants and boxers down to his bent knees. You took the latex out of the foil and you threw it away, not caring where it landed really.

You looked down to see his cock, up, alert, red, and leaking for you. You wanted to bend down and lick it clean, to taste it again, but your pussy is begging for it. It has been begging for it for the past week. You gulped as you felt your mouth watering, the back of your head touching the roof of the car from being kneeled on the seat.

Eddie was seeing how you were biting your bottom lip, looking down at his cock and– fuck you were going to be the death of him because if he is not inside you in the next three seconds, he is going to explode. He grabbed the condom from your hand, and immediately rolled it down, holding in a pathetic moan from finally feeling some friction, but it’s stupid to feel it from his own hands.

Your left hand pressed on his shoulder as the right one lifted the hem of your dress up towards your stomach, keeping it bunched up there, finally revealing your underwear to him. He licked the inside of his cheek as he saw how you pushed your thong to the side, and fuck– he could see it. He could see how sticky your underwear was to your pussy from how wet you were. He felt his heart punching his chest with the need to go down on you again, but you didn’t give him time to think at all.

You were already guiding yourself on top of him, the head of his cock gliding between your folds and catching onto your clit, making you moan with relief. Your body shook with adrenaline as Eddie’s hands went to your hips, bracing himself for the moment he had been dreaming of for days. He should have put music on because this was going to be loud, he knew it–

His thoughts were shut off as you started sinking down on him, no need for foreplay, no time for it. It was stupid to try to stop this. It was stupid to try to make this a one-time thing. It was stupid to try to make it seem as if the attraction was not there. It was stupid to try to deny that the year of hatred just made you both want eachother even more. Craving a friendship, or this, you don’t know.

A smile spread on your lips while you bit your bottom lip, your eyes closed as you relished in the feeling of finally having him inside, and you couldn’t wait to feel like last saturday again. Full. Satisfied. Relaxed. You didn’t notice how Eddie was fighting off closing his own eyes so he could drink you in. You were smiling while taking his cock, slowly, inch by inch. Fuck, he can’t wait to feel you around him, to feel you pulsating, throbbing, and then the clench. That delicious fucking clench.

He threw his head back on the headrest as your mouth finally opened with a silent moan, and you looked down to where the two of you were connecting, finally opening your eyes. Your left hand on his shoulder while the other gripped the roof handle on his side for some leverage. If you didn’t, then you were for sure going to sink down at once, and even if you know you can take him, you also know you didn’t stretch yourself out first. You’re wet enough to go slow, but not to immediately slam down on him like you did last time. 

“Oh, holy fuck…” He moaned out, breaths leaving his lungs in huffs, holding himself back from thrusting his hips upwards. The more you took him, the more he was beginning to lose control of his movements. He didn’t want you to be in charge, that was his job… but fuck, you looked so good like this.

You could feel him filling you up, finally swallowing up his base, noticing how his back arched from the backrest, just slightly, as well as a whimper leaving his lips. He looks so good, he feels so good. Your breath was completely out of your lungs as you adjusted to his size, walls fluttering around him, pulsating, sucking him in and not letting him go anywhere anytime soon.

He let out a loud grunt, almost a growl, opening his eyes when your hips finally touched his. He was breathing heavily through his nose as he looked where you clearly swallowed him whole, his cock deep inside of you, and your face did not show a single sign of pain, of hurt, of displeasure. He had some doubts from last time, that maybe the euphoria of it all let you take him the way you did but– no… No, you could take him.

You can fucking take him.

“God, yes...” You breathed out when you felt the tip of his cock just touch you in places you’ve never felt before, or in a while. You weren’t sure, and you really weren’t. All you know is that now you feel amazing, and that’s what matters, that he feels amazing. Your left hand gripped his shoulder tightly, your pussy suddenly clenching around him, making his eyes go wide, and his hips jerk upwards. You gasped at the feeling, the back of your head knocking on the roof, just gently. 

“Shit– Sorry Peach– But fuck do you feel good…” His ass was back on the seat, and you took the opportunity to hover a little longer so his cock would slide out of you a few inches, and then you slammed yourself against him, knocking the breath out of his lungs. Your eyes were glistening, the pleasure taking over your features and body.

“You feel good Eddie, so good–” You could admit that to him, just like he was to you. You rolled your hips against him, your G-spot being rubbed on and your mouth fell open in silent moans. Eddie could only grip your thighs, trying not to dig his fingertips into your flesh, not wanting to hurt you but–

It was as if the two of you were made for eachother.

You raised yourself from him, only to move down again, swaying your hips just slightly as you did so. He let out a sigh of pleasure, rolling his head over the headrest as he felt you start to create a tempo slowly. He could feel how deep he was inside of you, and he kept wondering how it was possible. But just like last time, maybe some things just have no answers. ‘Because it can’ and it was as simple as that.

You were now moaning a louder, your moves quickening as you felt him glide inside of you, feeling every vein and ridge of his shaft. You felt like you were floating on clouds by how good it felt, only the burning on your thighs from the work you were putting into bringing you back to earth. 

He saw how there was some drool pooling at the corner of your mouth as it remained open with noises coming out of it each time you went down on his cock. He could also hear the squelching sound of your juices, of your wetness all around him. You look so beautiful and perfect right now, he can’t help it. He leaned forward, his right hand moving to the back of your neck to pull you downwards and clash his lips onto yours.

You moaned into the kiss as your right hand now rested on his left shoulder, mimicking your left one. You kissed him back, instantly melting your tongue with his, savoring him once again as you kept moving your hips, up and down, quicker, faster, rougher, and his left hand moved from your thigh to your ass and then–

SMACK.

You gasped into the kiss, pulling away for just a second, your right ass cheek burning from the slap it received. 

“Eddie–!” His hand pulled you back to his lips by the back of your neck. You moaned into the kiss, his hand now rubbing the area where he slapped and you just rutted your hips against him, the tip of his cock just abusing your g spot, tipping you closer and closer towards the edge. 

You didn’t feel like yourself and Eddie didn’t either. It was weird to think that the two of you were just friends a few weeks ago and now you are roughly fucking inside his car, like two horny teenagers. The windows of it all fogged up, and you are pretty sure your moans can be heard from the fucking city. 

Your belly burnt and twisted, and you felt like it was going to explode. Your orgasm was coming closer and closer and Eddie could feel it all around his cock. Your walls were throbbing against him and in all honesty, Eddie had been thinking about this for so long that his own orgasm was coming quicker than normal. He grunted when he raised his hips and then set a brutal pace on you, pistoning his hips into you, the slapping of hips loud inside the small room in the car.

You pulled away from the kiss, holding onto his shoulders and feeling his fingertips digging into the flesh of your ass. He had a death grip on you, helping him pull you down towards him as he thrust upwards into you.

“So well. Taking me so fucking well Peach–” He groaned as he felt beads of sweat falling from the side of his face, your moans and the squelch of your pussy a degenerate but blissful sound in his ears.

“Eddie– Eddie– oh fuck–” Your belly coiled, pussy clenching around him which made him stutter, feeling himself getting closer. He wished he wasn’t, just to make you time two, maybe three times around his cock, but his body was betraying him tonight. He gave one deep thrust before pulling his hips back down onto the seat, making you slam down on him, a loud grunt escaping him.

You started moving desperately, trying to chase your high, needing it, and Eddie was just letting you use him at your disposal. You were moaning his name like your life depended on it and he was loving it. His right hand left the back of your neck to push one of the straps of your dress down, as well as the strap of your bralette.

He almost ripped the cup of the lace off you but he wasn’t going to risk being yelled at by you, so he pulled it downwards, making your left breast pop out. His mouth immediately latched on your neck, kissing it sloppily. You were dizzy, your mind completely shut off thanks to pleasure as your hips kept moving on him, feeling the drag of his cock against your walls, and the tip of it hit you deliciously where you needed him the most.

You felt him unlatch from your neck to then feel your nipple being pinched by teeth. You let out a pathetic whine, a whimper, and you hear him moan against you as his lips envelop your nipple and he starts sucking on it, making you sweat all over as you feel your orgasm as if it were about to murder you.

He could feel you, smell you, and you were driving him absolutely mad. He was throbbing, begging for release, but he was holding himself back trying to wait for you to cum around him first. He needs to feel it. He lets go of your nipple with a pop and he presses his forehead against your collarbone, his face twisting as his entire body starts to shake from the impending orgasm.

“Peach– I’m going to fucking cum, fuck–” And for some reason, knowing she was making him cum by just riding him stupid was the drop that tipped over the glass.

“Ed– Ed– Eddie–!” Your eyebrows were met in the middle as your mouth remained open with breathless moans as your walls clenched tightly all around him, making you stop moving. He threw his head back onto the headrest, feeling himself being engulfed by you, trapped by you around his base and it felt too good.

“You feel so fucking good baby, god fucking damnit–” You were trembling on top of him as he moved back and forth in the seat so his cock would drag inside of you, helping you ride your orgasm out, and he realized you came with penetration only. His hands held onto your thighs now, his hips thrusting as much as they could, his breath coming out ragged as he still felt you spasming around him, and clenching on him. “-- sh-SHIT!”

He pushed your thighs down on him, seething himself deep inside of you, finally letting a loud cry escape your lips, and he clenched his eyes as he moaned your name, his seed spilling into the condom in huge spurts, and in great quantities. His hips twitched underneath you, the vein in his neck popping off from the intensity of the orgasm. He felt so good, so satisfied, his breathing coming in heavy as well as yours as you both finally relaxed, him on the seat and you over him. 

The crescent moon marks on his shoulders thanks to your nails, your heart threatening to just give up on you at any moment, the fogginess of your climax starting to slowly wear off the more you catch your breath. Your legs were shaking, spasming every now and then and he winced from the overstimulation around him.

With one hand he managed to press the button to pull the window down, letting the cool air come in and it felt like a punch to the face, a punch of reality. You felt quite shocked suddenly, pulling the strap of your bra and dress over your shoulder, fixing it on you. Eddie was just like you, just staring at your middle because the adrenaline started to wear off and– fuck.

You slowly moved your hips upwards, pulling him out of you, earning a wince from the two of you. You saw the filled condom, making the situation more real than just a passing dream. You were trying to catch your breath yet as you moved, trying not to make a fool of yourself and just fall on your face, going back to the passenger seat, stepping over the console. Once seated, you fixed your dress, looking forward completely wide eyed, feeling your juices dampening your now fixed underwear, covering you once more.

Eddie was staring at the windshield, starting to get clearer, the fog of it coming off thanks to the window being open. He gulped as he looked down and took off the condom, hearing you still fixing yourself on the passenger’s seat. He tied the latex up, and opened the small trash can container that is underneath the radio. He has to remember to take it out the next day.

He fixed his pants, then the seat and then it was just silence as the two of you looked forward into nothingness. You were slowly putting your jacket back on, and then you could hear just how quiet the outside was, making the entire situation even more embarrassing.

“We… have to talk… but tomorrow–” You started, and he quickly answered.

“Agreed.” He knows the two of you are quite in a state of shock right now, so talking about this now was not the best idea. He sees you putting your seatbelt on, so he copies your movements, and before he can ask–

“Want to… sleep over?”

end of chapter 18

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a/n: it's all uphill from here

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[my-little-red-riding-blog]

Alpha and omega...big broad shoulders vs tiny slutty waist

[hungermakesmonsters]

Devotion & Desire

Chapter One

Plot summary : When you, a lone omega, move in across the hall from alpha Bucky Barnes, he knows that his life is about to get a lot more complicated, but he has no idea just how much you’re going to turn his life upside down. You’re both devoted to fixing your past mistakes, but will desire for something more get the better of you?

Pairing : Alpha!Bucky Barnes x Omega!Reader

Story Rating : R 

Warnings : [This is a fic for 18+ only, minors DNI] All chapters will contain the usual omegaverse and A/B/O tropes, and explicit smut. Please check the warnings on each chapter if you choose to follow this story. 

Word Count : 6.2k

A/N : this is my first time writing Bucky and writing omegaverse, sorry if anything doesn't meet the usual standards of the genre.

MASTER LIST

Chapter One

You were shivering and he hated what that did to him.

Soaked clothes clung to your figure, leaving nothing to the imagination and betraying every little shiver.

He watched you fumble with your soaked purse for your phone, and heard your frustration a moment later as your call quickly cut out. You shook it, wiped the wet screen on your damp blouse, but he knew that wasn’t going to help matters. Judging from the state of you, the phone was waterlogged and you’d be lucky to get it working again.

You leaned back against your apartment door, kicking it with your heel, letting out the weakest string of cuss words he’d ever heard. It was almost adorable.

All the while, he was pressed against his apartment door, eye to the peephole, watching it all unfold. It wasn’t so much that he was spying on you. No, Bucky liked to think that he was making your life easier. You were such a timid little thing and, ever since you’d moved in across the hall, he’d done everything he could to be a good alpha and not make you uncomfortable.

He’d seen how skittish you were the first time your paths had crossed; him leaving his apartment, just as you were getting home from the grocery store, shock causing you to fumble and drop your bags. You’d barely been able to maintain eye contact as he handed you your Cookie Crunch cereal. 

Of course, he didn’t hold it against you - how could he? You were an omega with no reason to trust him, and he knew it couldn’t be easy for you; being the only omega in the building, living across from the only alpha.

So, he’d taken to keeping an eye on you, making sure there were no more accidental meetings in the hallway and that you had no reason to fear him.

But now you were shivering and soaked from the storm raging outside, no coat over the blouse-skirt uniform you wore to work at Gracie’s diner. Had you walked three blocks in the rain without an umbrella? Hadn’t anyone tried to stop you? He found himself overwhelmed by the urge to help you, protect you and, before he realised he was doing it, he was slowly opening the door.

He couldn’t leave you out there, cold and shivering.

Your eyes widened and you shrank back a little. Bucky tried his best to give a friendly smile, making sure not to make any sudden moves or get any closer.

“Hey,” he said softly, “are you okay?”

“I -” your voice came out barely more than a shy whisper, “- I got locked out.”

“Did you call Glenn?” He asked, even though he knew you couldn’t, even though he knew your phone had died before you’d managed to get through to the building manager.

“My phone died,” you told him, holding it up as if you thought he might not believe you.

“Do you want me to call him for you?” He asked and you gave a timid nod. For a second he looked ready to turn and head back into his apartment for his phone, but then he saw you pull your arms around yourself, trembling even more violently. “Do you want to come in and get warm while you wait?”

He watched your eyes drop and let you take a few seconds to consider your options. It was late, far too late to go disturbing any of your beta neighbours and, he knew just how easy it was for omegas like you to get sick.

After a few seconds, you nodded.

“Okay,” he said softly, stepping back, giving you space to move into his apartment.

Your arms wrapped tighter around your body as you stepped over the threshold. He watched your nose twitch, obviously feeling a little overwhelmed by his scent.

“It’s okay,” he tried to reassure you as he slowly shut the door, “you’re safe, I promise. Wait here, I’ll grab you something warm.”

He didn’t wait for you to answer before quickly moving further into his apartment, heading into his bedroom. He was already starting to understand why the other residents of the building had taken to calling you little mouse. It turned his stomach upside down to think about how apprehensive you were and what might have happened to you to cause it.

You were still in the exact spot where he’d left you, still trembling and hugging yourself tight, clothes dripping on the carpet. (Though he quickly regretted looking down and seeing the way the drips from your clothes were running down your bare legs to your little white socks.)

“Here, you can borrow these,” he told you, handing you a dark hoodie and pair of sweatpants. “They might be a little big, but they’re warm.”

After taking them, you were ushered into the bathroom to dry yourself off and change, while he went to call the building manager. And, when you reemerged five minutes later, it took every ounce of restraint he had not to laugh at the sight of you, drowning in his clothes. He gave you space, waving a hand towards the sofa, indicating that you could sit if you wanted to.

You took a seat, peached on the very edge of the sofa.

“I’m Bucky, by the way,” he told you, realising that you hadn’t been officially introduced, even though he was sure you already knew his name like he knew yours. 

You responded with your own name, then; “thank you for helping me.”

“That’s okay,” he replied before taking a very obvious pause, giving you an uncertain look. “I have some bad news though; it’s Glenn’s night off. He won’t be back until the morning.”

“Oh.”

He watched as you glanced around nervously.

“I told him you could stay here,” Bucky told you. You both knew that you didn’t have any other choice, so you didn’t bother to try and argue. All you offered was a little nod. “Are you hungry? I was gonna order a pizza.”

“I - I like pizza,” you told him, managing to force a smile to your lips.

It took some coaxing from him, but he found out what pizza you liked and ordered it. Then he put the TV on for you, there was some weird baking program on but you seemed happy enough with it, so he left it on. If anything, the background noise seemed to settle you a little and, after a while, you finally sat back on the sofa, almost disappearing in his hoodie.

“Are you warm enough?” He asked when he noticed you pulling the hood up and snuggling into it.

“I am now.”

Bucky let out a soft laugh, the sort of sound he didn’t make very often and you caught him looking at you with a gentle sort of smile. He couldn’t help it, there was just something so cute about you in that moment, though he almost felt bad the moment he noticed you shyly start to chew on your lip.

“So,” he started, not sure what he wanted to ask, just wanting to make conversation and hopefully set you a little more at ease with him, “what made you move here?”

“After the blip I was staying in an omega-only building, but when everyone came back, the building’s original owner put up the rent,” you shrugged.

He gave a knowing nod. It wasn’t easy for omegas, while there were laws to protect them against discrimination, because of their monthly heat cycles and how prone they were to getting sick, it was hard for them to hold down well-paid jobs. He assumed that was why you worked at the diner, where shifts could be planned and swapped easily.

“I guess it must be weird for you living here with mostly betas... and me...” 

While he knew what it was like for him to have to live across the hall from you, he could only imagine how it felt for you. Alphas tended to learn at a young age to control themselves and to ignore day to day stimulus, but he knew omega’s had it worse, that their senses were heightened beyond even alphas. He’d catch your scent in the hallway from time to time, and he was certain you’d catch his. 

“It’s okay. Everyone’s been really nice, and -” you hesitated shyly, “- and you’re being nice now.”

He didn’t ask what you meant by now. Bucky knew better than anyone what he could be like, how his gruff, withdrawn and sarcastic attitude could make people uncomfortable.

“It’s been a long time since I’ve been around an omega, and I -”

A sudden knock that the door startled you enough to make Bucky wince, completely losing his train of thought. He gave you an uncomfortable look before standing and heading to the door, muttering about how it must be the pizza.

Five minutes later, you were both sitting on his sofa, eating pizza. He made awkward small talk, asking if the food was okay, telling you a little about the pizzeria and how he’d found it a couple of months back and, little by little, your responses got slightly less reluctant. Eventually, you seemed to realise that you were safe and that he wasn’t going to hurt you. He wasn’t sure when or why that became important to him, but the last thing he wanted was for you to feel unsafe around him.

Life had to be hard enough for a lone omega without your alpha neighbour making it worse. And, besides, surely it would be easier for the both of you if you weren’t constantly jumping at each other’s shadows.

Before he could say anything, he noticed you looking at his vibranium hand. Or rather, trying really hard not to look at his hand. It hadn’t even crossed his mind that he wasn’t wearing his gloves - why would he when he was sitting on his own sofa?

“It’s okay,” he said, shrugging, “you can ask.”

Shame flashed on your face and he could tell you were uncomfortable. “Did you have an accident?”

“Yeah, a very long time ago.”

“Oh, well... I’m glad you’re okay...”

For a moment he felt his lips almost pull into a smile, any discomfort he’d felt instantly washing away with your words.

“I, uh, heard you like to draw?” It came out more like a question and had you looking at him seeming a little confused.

“Yeah, a little,” you answered. “I’m not very good though. Who told you?”

“Nikki from downstairs,” he explained and you gave a little nod. “Her and Jade really seem to like you, they’re always talking about you.”

It made you smile, and that smile settled him a little. It was going better than he’d dared to hope and you no longer seemed afraid of him. In fact, you started volunteering information without being prompted. 

“They’ve both been really nice,” you told him, “they asked me to go out with them on Friday when I get off work.”

He smiled. “Girls night out?”

“Yeah, though... well, it’s been a really long time since I went on a night out...”

Bucky gave a knowing nod, knowing it probably wasn’t easy for you as an unclaimed omega.

“I’m sure Niikki and Jade will look out for you,” he reassured you.

Conversation from there got a little easier; he told you that he grew up in Brooklyn and that he’d been in the army, and you told him about work and how you’d seen him in Gracie’s Diner a couple of times. You’d never served him, Gracie had rules about that. She was an elderly, take-no-shit sort of woman, and was one of the few employers you’d come across who genuinely went out of her way to look out for the omega’s working for her.

After the conversation reached a natural conclusion, Bucky got up, gathering the dirty plates and the pizza box, and headed for the kitchen. He didn’t even realise that you’d followed after until he turned to find you standing there, and almost jumped out of his skin.

“Sorry,” you almost recoiled at his shock, “I just - can I have a glass of water?”

He looked at you for a moment, completely taken aback - it wasn’t often that anyone managed to sneak up on him - then he shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts.

“Yeah sure,” he handed you a glass, biting back a laugh, “now I get when they call you mouse, you’re so quiet.”

You let out a little laugh, shyly dropping your gaze as you moved around him to the sink. Bucky bit his lip, catching your scent as you stepped past him, and he instantly hated himself for how much he enjoyed your sweet smell.

His eyes followed you as you returned to the sofa, took a drink, and then let out the cutest little yawn he’d ever seen.

“Tired?” He asked, moving back towards you, but not sitting down.

“A little,” you shrug. “The dinner rush at Gracie’s was really hectic.”

He gave an understanding nod before starting to think about the sleeping arrangements. Under normal circumstances, he might have offered you his bed but, even if he changed the sheets that he rarely slept on, he was certain being in his bedroom would overwhelm your omega senses.

“I can get you some bedding and you can sleep on the sofa?” He offered, looking at you and then looking at the sofa, certain it was big enough for you to get a comfortable night’s sleep.

You glanced at your watch, seeming almost embarrassed when you realised it was only 10pm.

“You don’t have to yet -” you started to protest.

“It’s fine, really,” Bucky told you with a gentle smile.

You gave a couple more weak protests as he went to grab you some pillows and a blanket, but you still got to your feet and helped him set up a little makeshift bed on the sofa for you. He then paused, taking in the sight of you, drowning in his clothes.

“Are you gonna be warm enough?”

At just the mention you seemed to snuggle further into his oversized hoodie.

“I’ll be fine,” you said with a sweet smile before fighting back another yawn. “Thank you, Bucky.”

After some awkward shuffling about, making sure you had everything you needed, telling you to help yourself if you needed another drink, and giving you the TV remote, Bucky finally left you to get some sleep.

He felt awful for making you sleep on the sofa, but there was really no way you would have been comfortable in his room. It was still early, at least by his standards, but he grabbed his sheet and pillow and settled himself on the floor by the window, content to read for a few hours before trying to get some sleep.

He didn’t stir until around 2am a hazy nightmare ripping him from sleep. For a few minutes he sat, trying to calm his racing heart before realising that he needed to use the bathroom, and that was going to mean sneaking past you.

It took ten minutes for him to build up the nerve to try to sneak to the bathroom without disturbing you. Moving slowly, he crept from his bedroom and slowly made his way through the den towards the bathroom, but he couldn’t help but stop and look at your sleeping form. Somehow you seemed even smaller when you were sleeping, tightly curled up on your side, your face hidden somewhere in the hood of his hoodie.

For a few seconds, he lingered, listening to the soft sound of your breathing before starting to feel a little bit creepy, but it was nothing compared to how he felt when he finally reached the bathroom.

Once the door was closed and locked behind him, he was immediately overwhelmed by your sweet scent left on the towel you’d used to dry yourself and the damp clothes you’d left neatly folded on the radiator. He hated himself for the way his cock twitched and the way he lifted the towel to his nose.

Your scent stirred something in him that he hadn’t felt in years, a sort of longing that left him feeling uncertain, fighting against the urge to go to you and -

Fuck.

He didn’t know what he wanted to do. His cock twitched again at the thought of burying his face against your neck and pressing his nose to your gland. A wildly inappropriate thought that had his alpha urges starting to stir, wanting to claim you as his.

That thought made him feel worse; there you were, finally letting your guard down and starting to trust him and all he could think about was how good your tight little body would feel wrapped around his cock...

He felt like he was losing his mind.

It was your scent, the fact he hadn’t been this close to an omega in years and, now, it felt like you were everywhere.

He grimaced as he took a piss, then he started to pace, not wanting to have to sneak back past you when he was at half-mast. But the longer he stayed in the bathroom, the more your sweet omega scent got to him, driving him crazy.

Gritting his teeth, and hating himself more than ever, he reached into his sweatpants and started to stroke his aching cock. His free hand reached for your damp blouse and held it to his face, and he lost himself in thoughts of you. It wasn’t long before he was coming all over his hand, barely biting back his desperate grunts of pleasure, muffling them with your blouse.

Then, finally, he was able to sneak back to his room and spend the night thinking about how much of an asshole he was.

The next morning he got up early, sneaking past the little curled up bundle on the sofa and letting himself out of the apartment. He managed to get your key from the building manager and make it back upstairs before you woke, and you seemed more than happy to get out of there as quickly as possible once you were awake.

You did stop to give him a thank you hug, and Bucky damn near asked you to stay but, thankfully, you didn’t seem to want to linger.

Once you were gone, he went through his apartment, opening all the windows, trying to get rid of your intoxicating smell before heading out for the day.

The next day he came home to find a box in front of his apartment door. On top of it, there was an envelope with his name in large, looping letters, and beneath it was a bundle of clothing. The clothes you had borrowed. Cautiously, he reached for the envelope, opening it to find a thank you card from you. You had signed your name followed by three little x’s.

Opening the box, he realised it was an apple pie from Gracie’s, the sweet smell of sugar and cinnamon filling his nose, but it was the scent coming from the clothes you borrowed that really got to him. His cock twitched just at the thought and had him quickly unlocking the door to his apartment, wanting to get inside and try to get himself under control again.

Over the next few days, he did his best to avoid you, knowing it was best for both of you if he kept his distance, but fate seemed to have other plans.

First it was in the hallway, you leaving for an evening shift at the diner just as he was getting home; you smiled and made small talk, asking how he was and if he’d enjoyed the apple pie. Somehow it ended with him offering to walk you to work and then offering to meet you to walk you home. He insisted despite you telling him that he didn’t have to. The streets of New York late at night just weren’t safe for an unclaimed omega on her own. And, despite his discomfort, he knew he’d never forgive himself if anything happened to you.

He saw the looks he got as he waited outside Gracie’s for you, the smirks and the smiles, and the look of embarrassment that fell over your face when Gracie whispered something to you. But that didn’t stop it becoming a regular thing over the next two weeks.

Then there was laundry night, a night that had been a tactical affair for Bucky for as long as he’d lived in the building; every Wednesday after nine when no one else was around. But there you were, chatting with Nikki from downstairs who’d decided to follow you to catch up with the gossip.

He was about to turn back and slip away unnoticed, until -

“Hey Bucky,” Nikki called out.

He forced a smile to his lips and raised his hand in an awkward wave as he approached, and you gave him that shy little smile that always made his heart beat a little faster. He watched as Nikki’s eyes moved from him to you and back again, a barely suppressed grin tugging at her lips.

“We were just talking about my birthday on Friday,” she told him, giving you a sly little glance, “you should come out with us.”

“I don’t think so,” he shrugged, quickly focusing his attention on getting his laundry in the washer so he could get out of there as quickly as possible. 

“Come on Bucky, we need a big scary alpha to make sure the other alpha’s leave mouse alone,” Nikki continued.

If he hadn’t looked at you, he wouldn’t have noticed your sudden discomfort or the way you were chewing the inside of your cheek. Clearly there was more to Nikki’s comment than she was letting on.

“What other alphas?” He asked.

“It’s nothing,” you muttered, “it doesn’t matter.”

If Nikki noticed your discomfort, she certainly didn’t let it stop her from explaining; “last week some douchebag alpha spent half the night bothering her.”

“What?” He barely managed to rein in his annoyance, the instinct that told him you were to be protected, that you were some weak and helpless thing.

“Asshole kept asking when her heat was and if she needed company,” Nikki continued.

“He was just drunk, it wasn’t that bad,” you sighed.

“You’re too nice for your own good, mouse,” Nikki told you, shaking her head. “If me and Jade hadn’t been there...”

She didn’t need to say it. It wasn’t a secret how some alphas could be, how some didn’t want to take no for an answer, especially since the blip; so many of them returned to find their omega had moved on with their lives or, some, moved on without their omegas. But, just because the world was a mess, Bucky didn’t think you deserved to have to deal with some prick of an alpha who didn’t respect your boundaries. 

You let out a sigh and gave a weak shrug. “Maybe I shouldn’t go if you think it’s gonna cause problems...”

“What? No, that’s now why I’m saying, you have to -” 

“I can probably come for a couple of hours,” Bucky offered. He hated how dejected you looked, hated that you felt like you had to miss out on having fun with your friends because you didn’t feel safe.

“Really?” You asked, trying to hold back the smile that was desperate to spread across your face.

“Yeah,” he conceded, “but just for a couple of hours.”

Nikki reached over, giving him a playful punch on the arm. “You’re the best, Bucky.”

Fortunately for him, ten minutes later, the pair of you were done with your laundry and he was left to sit in relative silence with his book, wondering just how much he was going to regret agreeing to go out with you.

(A lot. The answer was a lot.)

He opted to meet you all at the bar about half an hour after everyone got there, managing to slip in unnoticed and take up at the bar, out of the way, but able to keep an eye on things, watching you on the dancefloor. That was why he was there; he was just making sure no one harassed you or tried to ruin your night. But he didn’t stay undiscovered for long.

You smiled as your eyes met his, leaning against the bar, waiting for your drink. He watched, not sure whether to be impressed or concerned as you knocked back a tequila shot and washed it down with a mouthful of beer. Your nose wrinkled at the taste, but he didn’t say anything until you purposefully looked his way again.

“What?” You asked him, noticing how he was watching you.

“What?” He repeated.

You moved closer to his side, your smile widening.

“You were watching me.”

“It’s just - you’re really not what I thought,” he told you, awkwardly.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

His stomach knotted the moment you started to frown, it was almost enough to make him wince.

“You’re just... you’re not like other omegas,” The moment he said it, Bucky seemed to realise how it sounded. Grimacing, he fumbled over an explanation. “I mean, you’re different from other omegas and tonight you just seem - I don’t know, I just feel like I’m seeing a new side of you.”

Your eyebrow rose and you just stared at him, lost for words.

“I’m sorry,” he tried again, “It’s just been a long time since I -”

“Talked to another human being?” You offered before cracking a smile.

“Yeah, something like that,” he said, giving a little smile of his own and falling silent.

He hoped that the conversation was over and that you’d return to the dancefloor, but you didn’t. Instead you stood right there, carrying on the awkward silence until the song changed and you had a terrible idea.

“D’you maybe wanna come dance?” You offered and he quickly flashed you a look that could only be described as pure fear. He shook his head, watching in horror as you reached for his arm and started to tug. You knew you couldn’t move him, but that didn’t stop you from trying. “C’mon, stop being a party-pooper.”

He let you struggle for a moment, hoping beyond hope that you’d get bored but, when you didn’t, he let out a sigh and knocked back his beer before getting to his feet. 

Your grin spread from ear to ear as you tugged him onto the dancefloor, ignoring the fact that his expression was stuck somewhere between amused and terrified. He didn’t dance. In fact, he pretty much just stood there awkwardly  until you grabbed his arms and forced some movement into his body, all while biting your lip and trying to stifle your laughter.

After a couple of songs he let you pull him back towards the bar with everyone else for another round of shots, chasing your tequila with beer again. He tried to take the opportunity to slink back to his seat, but the moment he started edging away, your arm wrapped around his, forcing him into the conversation.

When everyone returned to the dancefloor, you pulled him along with you, your hand dropping to hold his and squeezing tighter.

The music got more lively as the night went on and, as the bar started to fill, you found yourself moving closer and closer, until your body was pressed against his.

You barely seemed to notice your proximity to him, but Bucky noticed. His arm moved around your waist, keeping you safe from being jostled by other dancers and making sure the other alphas around knew that you were off-limits. He watched you as you lost yourself in the music and enjoyed the night.

At some point your hand ended you on his chest, and you were close enough that every sway of your hips had you brushing against him. Despite how crowded the room was, all he could smell was your sweet scent.

Every slow, deep breath he took, trying to keep himself in check, made it worse. And, when you leaned against him completely, looking up at him, he almost lost his mind.

“D’you want to get out of here?” You asked him.

The rational part of his mind told him that you meant you wanted to go home; the club was noisy and full, and it was probably wreaking havoc on your sensitive omega senses but, for a moment, he dared to hope that it meant more.

“Sure,” he told you with a smile.

As you made your way outside, he kept his arm around you, helping you navigate the crowd until you were finally outside in the cool night air. You decided to walk home and Bucky was honestly glad of the relative quiet of the New York streets versus the noise of the bar, and he was happy to walk side by side with you, only sparing you the occasional glance and smile.

“What?” You asked when you caught one of those smiles.

“Nothing,” he shook his head.

You nudged him with your elbow. “Tell me.”

“I was just thinking about the first time we met,” he explained, shaking his head, “you were so timid.”

“That was before I got to know you,” you shrugged. “I thought you were just the grumpy alpha who lived across the hall.”

“Grumpy?” He looked at you, offended.

“Very grumpy,” you smiled.

“And now?”

You looked at him, shyly biting your lip and fighting back a smile.

“Still deciding,” you answered playfully.

Bucky held the door open for you as you made your way into your building, grinning and giggling as you both boarded the elevator to the fourth floor.

It wasn’t long before you came to a stop outside of your apartment, and he watched you, waiting for you to open the door and slip inside, wanting to know that you were home safe and sound. 

Instead you looked at him for a moment before surging forward and pressing your lips to his. You lingered for a few seconds while he was completely paralysed by shock. When you pulled back, you bit your lip nervously, obviously forcing yourself to maintain eye contact while Bucky came to terms with what you’d just done.

“You’ve been drinking,” he said softly, and it was hard to tell if he was trying to let you down gently, or trying to talk himself out of doing something he might regret.

“Not a lot,” you answered, rising up to press another kiss to the corner of his mouth while your hands gripped his jacket.

“I don’t want to do anything you’ll regret...”

“I won’t regret it. I’ve wanted this for weeks,” you told him, pressing against him and feeling his arm slip around your waist. “Ever since I first caught your scent in the hallway... I thought it was gonna trigger my heat...”

A low rumble sounded in the back of his throat and the arm around your waist pulled tighter.

“Are you sure you want this?” He asked, this time not bothering to hide the way he was breathing in your sweet scent, the smell that had been haunting him for weeks.

You looked up, your pupils already dilated with arousal, staring at him in a way that had his last shred of control fraying completely. You bit your lip as you nodded, and that was all he needed from you.

Bucky fumbled for his keys, barely loosening his hold on you as he led you into his apartment, turning to kiss you the second the door was shut. He groaned as you whimpered against his lips, eagerly pressing against him, clinging to his jacket as he picked you up and carried you towards his bedroom. The kiss broke and your face pressed against his neck, letting out another little moan as you inhaled his scent.

His arms tightened around you, his alpha instincts desperate to take over, as he sat on the edge of his bed, you on his lap. He kissed you again, groaning against your lips as he felt your hips starting to rock against his. After shrugging out of his jacket and pulling off his gloves, he started to pull open your blouse, his hands trailing over every newly exposed inch of skin.

Your hands tugged at his shirt, urging it up over his head, and his heart almost stopped when he saw the way you were looking at him, drinking in the sight of him. You ran a hand down his chest and over the defined ridges of his abs before reaching the buckle of his belt. Looking up, you held his gaze as you slowly unbuckled him and started to work on the fastening.

Another noise sounded in the back of his throat, something barely restrained, something that wanted, needed. And you didn’t disappoint. Your hand slipped into his jeans and wrapped around his cock, pulling it out so you could start to stroke it. His breath caught when your eyes met his, glassy with need, your omega instincts starting to take control. You kissed him again, desperate and eager, as your hand worked up and down the length of his cock.

You surprised him when you pulled away, when you dropped to your knees in front of him and started to tug his pants and boxers down. Bucky lifted himself, helping you drag them down to his ankles.

He wanted to say something, wanted to tell you how perfect you looked as you looked up at him, as your hand gripped his cock again, but the words wouldn’t come. Instead he reached for you, cupping your cheek tenderly before letting his fingers slip down to your neck to ghost over your mating gland. A soft moan escaped you and there was a palpable spike in your arousal, the whole room seeming to fill with your sweet scent. 

Bucky breathed deeply, taking it all in, letting out a groan of his own when he realised there was another scent in the air; the tart scent of your slick.

Before he could even think, you started to nuzzle against his thigh gland, rubbing yourself against him scenting him while also coating yourself in his musk. You were giving yourself to him so completely, and there was nothing more arousing to him.

Your hand started to move again, slipping up and down his cock, causing a pearly glob of precum to form on his tip, and he about damn-near lost his mind when you leaned forward to lick it up. His tip continued to leak as you looked up at him through your lashes and started to take him into your mouth.

The tart smell of slick only seemed to get thicker as you started to suck him, slowly taking more and more of him into your mouth, until he felt himself nudge the back of your throat. Your eyes watered but remained fixed on his, lips pulling back before sinking down again.

It wasn’t until his head dropped back that Bucky realised his mistake.

You moved so suddenly, your lips pulling away from him, your hand reaching for your boot.

He saw the knife just in time to stop it from piercing his chest, his vibranium arm catching your wrist and twisting it. 

You struggled against him, jaw clenched, any sign of arousal now completely gone from your face despite the way the smell of it still hung in the air.

“What the fuck?” He demanded, gripping you tight.

You didn’t answer save for letting out a sound of indignation and anger, pure rage on your face as you struggled against him. He wasn’t going to let you go until he got some answers, until he figured out just what the fuck was going on.

But you threw a punch, then another, first catching him on the cheek before getting him square in the nose. It was enough of a distraction to cause him to loosen his grip, and that was all you needed.

Pulling away, you sprinted from his room. He tried to follow after and almost tripped, running and pulling his pants up as he went. 

You left his apartment and darted into your own, locking the door behind you. 

By the time he’d kicked the door down, you were already halfway down the fire escape. He climbed out of the window, ready to follow, watching as you had to jump down to the street below, falling awkwardly. He started after you but then he stopped, knowing that there was nothing he could do; despite the hour, there were too many people around, and if a sweet little omega like you started screaming about the big scary alpha, no one was going to believe his side of things.

Swearing under his breath, he turned and headed back to his apartment, pulling out his phone. One way or another, he was going to find you and he was going to find out what the fuck was going on. 

End Note : anyone new to my fics... sorry for the twist, it's just what I do 😅 So, yeah, this is my first time writing omegaverse and my first time writing Bucky. It's set post Falcon and the Winter Solider and post blip. Will I follow canon strictly? Probably not. Anyway, if you've read this far, thanks so much for checking this out! I don't have a set upload schedule for this fic, but I'm going to try to update it at least once a month.

If you'd like to be tagged in future chapters, let me know!

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I found a book that could apparently kill people if it was read, I tried to read it and I survived.

The book was fucking South Park mpreg omegaverse slavery fanfiction.

[ecstarry]

do you ever stop and think like at least once someone connected to the white house wifi and opened ao3

[whalyrae]

DANCE WITH ME - CHAPTER 7

“If you want to keep a secret, you must also hide it from yourself.”

Summary : All your life, you thought you were a beta, a simple and boring beta. Until everything change. But now that you've presented yourself as an omega, how will you manage to live and hide it from your six friends and best friend, all alphas and all in the same pack? (a/n : I'm a shit for summary I'm so sorry-)

Genre : soulmate au (of course I'm a bitch for this), omegaverse, bangtan alphas au!, omega reader, fluff, angst, eventual smut, polyamory relationships

Status : In process

Word Count : 5k

Warnings : the usual one I guess, like smut, angst, fluff (yeah its a warning for some people ) mention of depression, abusive parents (physically and morally), violence and blood, PTSD, scars, self harm,…

Tag list : @ghostlyworld @kawaiikpoplover268 @scuzmunkie @iamkookiesforyou @00ihatesnaku @stellauniverse @akemiixx01 @aceofcards05 @strxwbloody @seoul9711 @amara-mars @alex-walker-86 @yoongicatcat @xicanacorpse @maciesmess 

A/N : It took me more time than I thought to write this sorry (again ;-;) dealing with mental health issues is shit really I wish I was strong and courageous like my characters LMAO. So as an apology, this chapter is a little longer than usual :D Hope you'll like it !

I'll never thank u enough for all the likes and shares despite the looong time I take to write and publish the next chapters ;w; that's my only motivation to keep writing the story tbh...! (I have severe impostor syndrome yes...... ^^) so thank you again !! Don't hesitate to let a comment here, or in my inbox !! ♥

Also I made a playlist for the story ! If you have any songs who made you think about the story, you can share it to me and I'll add it on the playlist ! ♥

Masterlist | ao3 | wattpad | Spotify playlist

Chapter 6 // Chapter 8

☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾

A/N² : again it's barely proof read, sorry for the potential mistakes TwT

. . .

The day has come. The practice exam was this afternoon. 

When you woke up this morning, you felt like you wanted to throw up. Being stressed was an euphemism. You didn’t even know why you felt like that. You spent the previous weeks practicing, alone and with Wooyoung. You even had some help and advice from his boyfriend, San. 

You never get why you were so stressed. Once the music started, all the anxiety and apprehension would disappear. It had always been that way when you danced. 

These last few months, your body was really testing you, and you weren't thanking it at all. 

You knew the steps perfectly, you and Wooyoung’s coordination and synchronization were perfect. You were more than ready, you knew it. And despite that, you were anxious, sure you’d fail everything, having bad notes, failing your scholarship after working so hard…

“Y/N ?”

The sudden voice startled you. In your kitchen, you were the last remaining in this apartment. Your roommates had already left, wanting to rehearse one last time before the exam. 

You would have done the same, but the stress and anxiety had given you such a stomach ache that it took you longer to get out of bed. 

You weren’t surprised to see Jimin not really anxious. You'd never seen him stressed when it came to dancing. And from the relaxed attitude Hoseok and Jungkook had shown since you'd met them, you suspected they were in the same category as Jimin. 

When you recognized the voice and noticed Jin facing you, you couldn't hide your surprise. 

“I thought you all left for work ?” you asked him, trying to stay calm. 

“Yoongi don’t need me at this hour,” Jin replied with a chuckle, “I'll be more of a nuisance than anything else. Is everything all right?”

You noticed the two cups of coffee held in his hands when he handed one to you. You silently thanked him and took a sip after blowing on the top of the cup to not burn yourself. It was delicious. Jin's coffees were the best. He'd never forgotten how you took it, ever since the first time he'd served you on the day you met. 

"I can smell your stress from the doorway, you know?" he said after a few seconds, seeing that you didn't answer because you simply didn't know what to say. 

You chuckled and pursed your lips, it was a nervous laugh. 

"Is it that obvious?"

"Trust me there's a picture of you next to the word anxious in the dictionary!"

Okay, the next laugh was more relaxed, more sincere. Jin had this sense of humor that some might find heavy and boring, but it was just the opposite for you. You were always the first to laugh at his jokes, sometimes even against your will. But what could you do? Jin was naturally amusing. He had a way of lightening the mood quickly and with just a few words. 

“Everything will be fine, you don’t have to worry about that.” He kept talking, as he took a step towards you, "You've worked hard, you've done your best, there's no reason for you to fail. Don't forget that you're good, you're really good."

Delicately, his hand came to rest on your shoulder, provoking a slight discharge that was anything but painful. 

How had you never noticed that what you felt for them, for him, wasn't friendship? That need you felt with every physical contact, your heart racing, your stomach twisting in such a pleasurable way. 

You felt both foolish for having been so blind and in denial all this time, but at the same time relieved to have finally been able to put a word to all these things, to finally have a clear vision of the situation. 

The only thing you couldn't control, and wouldn't control, would be the boys' reaction when you admitted to them that you were an omega. Because yes, now that the end of exams had arrived, and on top of that, you were going to be entitled to two weeks' rest, you were going to have to tell them (part of) the truth. You'd promised yourself you'd do it, you couldn't back out. Especially as your next heat could come at any moment. 

Perhaps that's also where the stress came from, that uncertainty, that lack of knowledge about the coming heat you were so worried about, about how you were going to manage it, about...

"Y/N... you're overthinking again."

You bite your lips nervously, shaking her head with a nervous smile. 

“Ah, yes, I’m sorry… I guess it’ll be better at the end of the day !”

Jin shook his head with a chuckle, and his face changed quickly from a most serious one, maybe the most serious face she had seen since she met him. 

“I’m sure it’s more than just… this exam, but you won’t talk to us, nor Jimin. You know we could never leave you, or judge you, no matter what it is ?”

So they all noticed you were acting differently, didn't they? Of course, they could. You weren’t the best to hide when something was wrong. And even if you were, Jimin could read you like an open book. And you did not doubt that he would have later confided to his partners. 

“I know, and it’s the same for me, I just… need to get done with this exam first.” you began, your voice trembling, “I know I haven't been... the most agreeable person lately, and I'm sorry for that, sincerely…”

You looked away, for some reason feeling your eyes sting, as if you wanted to cry. 

“Hey, hey, listen... look at me, please,” Jin's hands rested delicately on your cheeks. He waited patiently, and resumed once your eyes met, “You don't have to apologize, we all go through moments more tense, more difficult than others that make us more tense and nervous, no one here holds it against you, believe me.”

You nodded. He wiped the few tears from your eyes and leaned to place his lips on your forehead. And it's a good thing you had a certain amount of self-control, that you could restrain your actions, your desires, and your impulses, because the only craving you had right now when you felt Jin's soft lips against your forehead, was to raise your face and have your lips meet his. 

It was the hardest thing you'd ever had to do. 

“Ah, I have an idea !” he exclaimed as he stepped back, leaving you with a very unpleasant feeling of emptiness, “I'll drive you to your class, we'll go through the café, and Yoongi will give you croissants and coffee for you, Minnie, Kook' and Hobi!”

You blinked several times, not taking your eyes off him while he moved into your apartment to grab your bag.

“Wait!” You called out as you grabbed his arm, “I thought Yoongi didn’t want to be disturbed before the opening?” 

"Oh don't worry, we’ll be quick. Plus if it's you he won't say anything." Jin shrugged with a smirk as he handed her her bag, “You know, he doesn't show it, but he has a soft spot for you.”

You raised your eyes to the sky, trying to prevent your body from betraying you, but you couldn't. You could already feel your face and ears heating up. You knew Yoongi's temperament; he had his own way of showing affection to the people he loved. You also didn't doubt that he cared for you, but to use the word “soft spot”... 

“You're blushiiing...” Jin suddenly teased. 

“I'm not!” you exclaimed as you walked past him with your head down hiding any hints of blush if there were one, “Let's go! I don't want to be late!"

You didn't want Jin to be able to see what effect this was having on you, what effects they all were having on you. And that damn body that would only betray you... the coward! 

“Yes ma'am!” Jin couldn't hold back his giggle and stepped out with you, wrapping his arm around your shoulder. The warmth of his embrace, his very singular scent didn't help your mood at all. “Aaah what are we going to do with you, little tsundere!”

“I'm not a... argh, you know what, never mind!” 

You didn't know why, but you had a feeling it was going to be a very long day. 

°°°

When you arrived at the dance hall less than an hour later, you quickly spotted Hoseok, Jungkook, and Jimin chatting with each other. Jungkook was the first to spot you and waved to you with his eternal big smile that melted you every time. 

You looked around for San and Wooyoung, remembering the day before that Wooyoung told you that some of the second and senior-year students would be there to watch the first years, which added a layer of stress because some of them, being alphas, were the ones who had almost harassed you to be an omega at the beginning of the year. 

But as you and Wooyoung had said to each other in the café when you first met: "We'll take the opportunity to nail all those pretentious alphas who like to spend their lives looking down on us!" 

And that was your main motivation right now. 

"Noona! We're here!" he exclaimed, drawing the attention of several students to you, which you decided to ignore because all their attention would be on you in about a dozen minutes anyway. 

"Oh great pastries!" exclaimed Jimin, taking the box from your hands as you handed it to him, "They're from Yoongi hyung!"

"Thank god, I love him so much, I'm starving..." muttered Jungkook who didn't wait to open the box and take out a cupcake which he bit into instantly. 

“Oh, you have Jin's scent on you...” Hoseok didn’t seem to be interested in pastries and approached you. You almost had the impression he was humming you quickly. "Hey, you're wearing his hoodie!”

You and Jin had gone to the café where Yoongi was already, and as Jin had told you earlier, Yoongi's face, initially shut and ready to scold Jin by reminding him that he didn't like to be disturbed in the morning, had immediately softened on seeing you appear beside him. Jin noticed this immediately and didn't stop himself from pointing out that he'd been right by giving you a little nudge on the shoulder and a chuckle, making you grumble as you did your best not to blush again. 

Yoongi of course understood why Jin had brought you along, because like everyone else, he knew that this day was important for Jungkook, Jimin, Hoseok, and you. 

He didn't ask any questions, he didn't even say a word. He just walked away and packed some pastries he knew you or the boys would enjoy, and you even noticed that he'd slipped a Strawberry Shortcake into the box, your favorite.  

When he walked to you and handed you the box, you could have sworn he brushed his fingers against yours on purpose, sending a long shiver down your spine. But he didn't notice, or so you hoped because even if he did, you didn't see any reaction from him. 

Once back in Jin's car, you noticed that you'd forgotten your jacket at the apartment, and unfortunately, you didn't have time to go home again. Jin hadn't hesitated to give you his hoodie, a café-au-lait-colored hoodie that was far too oversized for you, and you were floating in it, which made him laugh.  

The reason you couldn't say no was his smell. Like all of them, Jin had a very particular scent, very sweet but very strong, which invaded your whole being the moment the hoodie's fabric settled on your body. That same warmth returned to your stomach and probably also to your face, but Jin couldn't see it since you'd pulled the hood over your head. 

How could a simple piece of clothing make you feel so safe? 

“Noona? Noona!” Jungkook’s voice startled you, “Is everything fine? Don’t tell me you’re stressed!”

You blinked a few times and noticed your four friends staring at you, Jimin looking a little more worried than the others. Perhaps because he knew you best. 

“Ah yes, yes I’m fine!” you assured with a small smile, "Of course I'm stressed, not to be would be a sign of recklessness!"

"Well, I'm not really..."

"That's exactly what I'm saying!" you exclaimed, cutting off Hoseok who just couldn't help but laugh, "Ah and yes it's Jin's hoodie, I forgot my jacket at the apartment..."

"You could have asked me, I would have given you mine," Jimin muttered before receiving a small elbow from Hoseok. You looked at him, confused, and rubbed the back of your head with a shy smile. 

"You can give it to me if you want. No, wait... that's not what I meant..." you frowned, more to yourself, and tried to hide the heat wave by imagining yourself having not only Jin's scent but also Jimin's on you. 

"Oh no? What did you mean then?" Jungkook leaned towards her with a small smirk, "If you want I can pass you mine too, and I'm sure Hobi will do the same!" 

You frowned as you realized that Jungkook was starting to tease you, suspicions confirmed when Hobi also tapped him on the shoulder. But the mere idea of being surrounded by all the smells of your roommates and friends was enough to send a wave of warmth through your lower belly and your whole being. 

You had to change the subject, avoid the conversation going any further, or maybe find Wooyoung... 

Just when you needed it most, Wooyoung came up behind you and almost jumped on your back, snatching a laugh in the process. 

"Yo, did you miss me?" said Wooyoung in a cheerful tone who had his arm wrapped around your shoulder, he turned to your three friends and greeted them, a thin smile on his lips as he saw Jimin's reaction. It had reached the point where Wooyoung liked to make fun of Jimin's reactions, as he was the one who was the most protective of you, and according to Wooyoung, even jealous and possessive. But you still refused to believe it, being 100% certain that Jimin felt nothing but deep friendship. 

"You can't even imagine," you said ironically, rolling your eyes before grabbing Wooyoung's wrist and pulling you away from your three friends, "there's one last thing we need to discuss, good luck for later!"

"If you think we need luck..." chuckled Jungkook, making you roll your eyes at him again.  

You quickly walked away with Wooyoung, isolating yourselves in a corner of the dance hall, before letting out a long sigh.

"Wow, you don't look good, tense? Don't worry, we'll handle it!"

"Partly, but not only, there's something really weird going on..." 

You quickly told Wooyoung what had happened with Jin, then your reaction to your previous conversation with Jimin, Jungkook, and Hoseok. 

He remained silent for a few seconds after your explanation, before simply shrugging his shoulders. 

"It's a common thing with omegas, it's called a nest. Well, it's not a nest, but your behavior bears a strong resemblance to one." 

Seeing your confusion, Wooyoung gave a little laugh, not a mocking laugh, but an affectionate one, because indeed, you had a lot to learn. 

He then explained to you that a nest is usually a place where an omega can be comfortable and relaxed, whether they are in heat or just having a bad day. It mostly is the omega’s couch, filled with soft things, the most smelling like their mates if they have one. When they are mated, omegas can share their nest with their partner. 

"But that's the basic definition, made by idiots who like to put us in cases. It's happened very often with us that one of our alphas made a nest himself, because as long as it comforts them, why does it have to be only for omegas?" 

You nodded and smiled. Well, of course, Wooyoung was right, and when you learned this, you wondered why you'd never heard of what a nest was before today. Having grown up in an all-alpha family, a very closed-minded family at that, you weren't surprised that they didn't practice this sort of thing. Thinking back to your mother and sister, you realize that they could both use a little bit of it. As well as a good therapy.

"So that means it's not a sign that I'm going into heat?" you asked, a long sigh of relief leaving your lips as Wooyoung nodded. "Good, I wish I could tell them before it happens, I wouldn't like to... force it on them you know." 

"I understand, don't worry. Are you planning to tell them today?" 

You'd had a long talk with him the day before, about your decision to tell Jimin and your friends that you were an omega, to tell them the whole story. 

"Don't forget that if anything goes wrong, our door is wide open to you! Hongjoong hyung will welcome you with open arms, even though I'm sure everything will go perfectly!"

Wooyoung's optimism could be contagious at times. But he was right, you shouldn't think about the negative, you knew your friends after all, and you knew Jimin better than anyone else in this world. They wouldn't reject you for that. 

You hadn't had time to reply, the teachers, and a few senior students, including San, entered the room. The first-year students fell silent, knowing that the serious part was just about to begin. 

°°°

"Wait, you're first?!"

Jungkook exclaimed, looking at the grade board a few hours later. He turned to Wooyoung and you, as did several students who whispered words you didn't even understand. 

Slowly, you walked over to the board and looked at the sheet of paper on which the grades were written.

Jungkook Jimin and Hoseok were second. It had to be said that their performance was incredible. They had successfully mixed their solo and trio performances, creating a highly original tableau while respecting the given instructions. 

But apparently, the teachers preferred you and Wooyoung's performance. Even if there were only five small points that set you apart from your friends. 

A week before the exam, you and Wooyoung came up with the idea of teaching each other's solo choreography to the other. The solo instruction was that the creation had to be original and from the student himself, and there was no indication that the duo dance partner couldn't participate. Several of you had this idea in your class.

It seems this technique had paid off because you were now top of the class. 

"I don't believe it... Y/n pinch me please," asked Wooyoung in a whisper, before letting out a little scream as you obeyed. "Hey, that hurts!"

"You asked me to pinch you!" you exclaimed, turning to face him. 

"But it wasn't serious! Ah, we're first noona, we made it!" Wooyoung's face lit up and he took you in his arms, making you burst into a frank laugh, but also a way of letting out all the stress accumulated over the last few weeks. 

You hugged Wooyoung for a few seconds, unable to hide your joy and relief at having achieved such a formidable accomplishment, knowing the talented dancers in your group. Of course, you couldn't help but feel a hint of satisfaction at being able to rise above Jimin and your friends. 

You, who'd always had that imposter syndrome when dancing alongside talented dancers like Jimin, Jungkook, and Hoseok, seeing your name inscribed in front of theirs made you realize that you belonged here, that you deserved it, like them, like Wooyoung.

San called Wooyoung, who jumped into his arms and couldn't help but share his joy with his boyfriend. San hugged him back, praising him. He stretched out his hand to you, and you gave him a high five as he winked at you.

"Noona!"

You turned to Jimin, who was walking towards you with a smile like you'd never seen before. Behind him, Jungkook and Hoseok seemed to be just as happy for you, and that only made your heart beat faster. 

You'd always known that between you and Jimin, there'd never been any competition, but you'd had this little thought that maybe Jungkook and Hoseok wouldn't be like him, and you were so relieved to find out that you were wrong. 

“It’s amazing, you are amazing!”

Jimin couldn't resist taking you in his arms, hugging you tightly. This time, you couldn't refuse this hug, you needed it. The stress of the last few weeks was fading away, and you missed your best friend's touch more than ever. 

Anyway, you'd tell them tonight that you were an omega, you didn't want to hide anymore.

°°°

Or maybe, you could wait a little more? 

Because now that you were probably a few minutes before telling (one of) the deepest secrets you ever had, you didn’t know if it was a good idea. 

They were all here, you were all in Namjoon, Jin, and Yoongi’s apartment. They had decided to order a multitude of dishes and side dishes, which you shared on the coffee table. At the center of the table was a large bouquet made by Taehyung himself, who couldn't help himself when he heard how well Jungkook, Jimin, and Hoseok and you'd done. 

“Y/N please, don't forget us when you'll be one of Beyoncé's main dancers, okay? I'd love to have an autograph!”

You nearly choked on your soda at Jin's remark, causing general hilarity. 

“I don't want to dance for Beyoncé!” you couldn't help but laugh despite it, and you got up to grab a towel from the kitchen to wipe yourself off, “ah I swear Jin... you do have an imagination...”

You rolled your eyes as you heard them still laughing and joking about it. From the kitchen, you had a perfect view of the living room and your friends. They were eating, laughing, and teasing each other. There was no negativity in the room. You didn't want to risk ruining it now. But at the same time, you told yourself that if you didn't do it now, you'd never have the courage to do it again. You'd then have your heat without the ability to hide it, things could then degenerate one way or another, and you could lose them forever. 

The thought only was enough to bring tears to your eyes. 

“Hey Y/N, everything okay?”

Yoongi's voice startled you, and you realized that he had joined you in the kitchen. The others didn't seem to have noticed your sudden tension, too busy with their conversations, unlike him. 

You didn't answer, just stared at him blankly at first, and could read the worry in his eyes, but also that little spark of gentleness that was so peculiar to him, a look that could give courage to anyone for whom it was intended. That look meant “You can do it, everything will be all right.” 

It was the same feeling you had when you spoke to Jin earlier this morning, except that Jin passed it on with his words. 

Your heart beat too fast, your mouth went dry. You had to do it. 

Without breaking eye contact, you finally opened your lips, and the words came out slowly, in an insecure, trembling voice. 

“I'm an omega.” 

The others didn't seem to hear you. Yoongi remained silent for a few seconds, without saying a word. Seconds that seemed to last an eternity. Seconds when you had time to imagine the worst possible scenarios, and he seemed to have guessed it.

It was only when he gently took your hand in his that you noticed it was shaking. 

“I know.” he murmured in a soft, reassuring voice, seeing your eyes widened with surprise and confusion, he shook his head with a small laugh, ” Later.”

You opened your mouth to reply but soon saw Jimin's face in your sight. 

“Noona! What's the matter? Are you alright? Did you burn yourself? you-”

“Jimin, let her talk, will you?”

This time it was Namjoon who had spoken, his voice sounding just as reassuring as Yoongi's. Everyone had fallen silent and was staring at you. You looked at each of them, ending with Jimin, whose gaze was filled with unspeakable concern.

You felt a slight pressure on your hand from Yoongi, who wanted to give you the courage to go for it. 

So, like with him, you did your best to gather your thoughts, to coordinate your voice and the words that should come from your lips.

“I... I am an Omega...”

Unfortunately, your voice was shakier than the first time. You couldn't help feeling even more ridiculous as you felt your eyes sting with tears.

“I am sorry... truly sorry I... I didn't mean to hide it...” you managed to articulate, ”I thought I was a beta until... recently and... I panicked.” you take a deep breath as you squeeze Yoongi's hand a little tighter, ”I'll understand if you're angry with me, if you don't want to be friends anymore or...”

“Don't be ridiculous!” 

You recognized Jimin's voice and embrace, which came suddenly, but which you accepted with barely hidden relief. His voice was shaking.

“You're my best friend, the most important person in my life as if that could change over something as trivial as that!”

You couldn't hold back a tear that ran down your cheek. Tear that couldn't finish its way when Yoongi ran his finger over your cheek to wipe it away. 

“It doesn't matter if you're an omega, an alpha, or a beta. You're our Y/N, we love you just the way you are!” exclaimed Jungkook, who sounded just as relieved as Taehyung and Jin. 

Namjoon nodded with a small smile and approached you. You had trouble seeing him, as Jimin had decided to cling to you. 

“It happens frequently actually. You think you are an alpha, and it turns out you're a beta, or an omega, or the other way around.” He explained, placing his hand on your hair as you acquiesced, which he began to stroke in a way that was intended to be gentle and reassuring. 

“You all don’t seem that surprised…” you said as you remembered words a few minutes ago, and when you heard Jungkook cough, you turned to him, confused. 

“I… I heard you a few weeks ago, you were on the phone with Wooyoung… Yoongi hyung heard me and we told the others…”

Ok, this one you didn't see it coming. But in the end, it doesn’t matter anymore. 

“Why didn’t you tell us? Why didn’t you tell me?” Jimin finally asked, looking at you curiously, and somewhat a little hurt by your silence, which you thought was totally valid. 

“Minnie, can you let go of her ?” Hoseok asked with a little laugh. 

“No, I have months of hugs to catch up !” he exclaimed, his grip on you tightening a little, making the others sigh. But you couldn’t help but let out a laugh. You didn’t mind it at all. You need it more than anything right now.

Oh how you missed his embrace, his warmth, his scent all over you. It felt so good, so right to be in his arms. It felt like where you should be. 

It felt like home.

“I didn't tell you because... when I saw the disgust... the disappointment in my mother's eyes...” You shook your head, swallowing back your tears, “That's why she asked me not to come anymore. I couldn't have supported... I couldn't have supported losing you too...” You looked at Jimin who held you closer to him, "to lose you all..."

Admitting these words out loud was harder than you thought. You weren't the kind of person to talk openly about your feelings, fears, and anxieties. 

“I don't want things to change, I don’t want you to treat me differently...”

You bit your lower lip. Your heart was beating a hundred miles. 

“I hope I never have to meet your parents,” Hoseok said in a cold voice you'd never heard from him, and strangely you found it oddly seductive.

“What a bunch of assholes,” Taehyung said disdainfully.

“I'm not even going to correct you this time. What a bunch of jerks.” Jin shook his head, frowning.

“Look, who cares? You're an omega, so what? Is this about your heat? We'll find a way to deal with it, just like we do with our ruts. We don't care, that's not the most important.” Namjoon smiles affectionately at you, “The main thing is that you feel comfortable with us, that we're all comfortable with each other, that's how a pack works after all, isn't it?”

This time, you hid your face against Jimin's shoulder, unable to hold back your tears any longer. 

“Wait... did I say something wrong?” Namjoon asked somewhat panicked, making the others laugh, even you, between sobs. 

“Don't worry, some stress to relieve.” Yoongi grabbed Namjoon's hand, kissing his cheek at the same time, before moving back to the sofa. “She’s fine now, everything will be fine from now on.”

“Ah Noona, I was so scared!” Taehyung exclaimed as he came around to hug you from behind, his torso pressing against your back. 

All these weeks, all this stress, this tension, this constant fear of living through this fateful moment had just come to an end tonight. 

Wooyoung had been right, once again. Things couldn't have gone better. 

Perhaps there was still the feelings thing, but for the moment, you didn't want to think about it. You just wanted to enjoy this moment, this acceptance you'd never had before today. You just wanted to enjoy Jimin's warmth, which you'd missed so much, and Taehyung's, and even Jungkook, who'd added to the hug somehow. 

As Jimin said, he didn't let go of you all evening, snuggling up to you like a Koala to its branch. You don't remember how the evening ended, except that you found yourself lying in a bed between Hoseok and Jimin. 

And for the first time in what seemed like an eternity, you slept a nightmare-free sleep, your heart and soul as light as they'd ever been. 

[honeyhotteoks]

this night together - chapter eight (j.yh + s.mg)

chapter eight: just what friends are for

chapter summary: a new set of friends help you through heat and this time it just works like clockwork

warnings: this is a full smut-a-thon. specific tags for: heat, knotting, and other a/b/o dynamics, gratituous use of 'alpha' and 'omega', fingering, thigh riding, oral (f receiving), use of sex toys / dildos, frank conversations about sex and heat, praise praise praise, light degradation, alpha on alpha action which means m/m pairing here, not just them helping reader, so much cum including the artificial kind.....

notes: thank you all so much for your patience!! next chapter is in progress, but tbd on post date.

pairings: alpha!yunho x alpha!mingi x omega!reader for the core fic overall, but this chapter is alpha!seonghwa x alpha!san x omega!wooyoung x omega!reader

genre: smut, a/b/o/omegaverse, angst, fluff, romance, polyamory

word count: 16.8k

previous chapter | next chapter | AO3

Unlike your last heat, this time you sleep through the night. Despite the ache in your hips and the hot flashes that leave you kicking off your covers, you stay deep in sleep with the comforting scent of another omega near you. You don’t start to wake properly until morning, with the sun peeking through the gaps in the curtains. 

For a moment, just a sliver of a second, you forget where you are. A little jolt running up your spine as you feel a warm body underneath you, but then you see his tan skin and mop of black hair and remember you’re with Wooyoung and you’re safe. You let yourself relax again, cheek once again on his shoulder and you take a deep, steady breath. The warm summer sun washes through you at his scent, and your busy mind seems to quiet back down. He’s still sleeping, head turned to the side away from you and mouth open, the room silent except for the tiny little catches in the back of his throat that indicate he’s still deep in sleep. 

At some point in the night your bodies became further tangled up together, that’s the first thing you really notice. You’re almost entirely on top of him, lounging across him like he’s a body pillow, with one leg hitched over his thigh and your face buried in his chest. The second thing you notice is how tight your stomach is and how hard your nipples feel pressed up against the rough fabric of your shirt. 

Wooyoung groans a little, stretching under you as he stretches into his morning, and you’re doing just fine until his leg shifts and suddenly you’re pressed firmly against his thigh. 

It’s almost embarrassing how apparent the wet patch in your underwear is, just the sensation of something warm pressing up against your slick core leaving your body responding in seconds. Your nipples harden further and your back aches a little, but you stay as still as you can and exhale softly, trying to disguise how shaky and needy you feel in your gut. 

Wooyoung grumbles something, his head tossing to the opposite side, and you feel his arm close over your back, “Hey, cuddle bug,” 

It cuts the tension immediately, and you laugh against his chest, “Sorry, I know I kind of attached in the night,” 

“It’s fine,” His hand smooths up and down over your back and you press your eyes closed to ignore the throbbing you’re starting to feel. He yawns above you, “It’s good you slept,” 

“Mhm,” You nod against his chest. 

“Are you feeling okay?” He checks. 

“Very, very comfortable,” You tell him, and that’s partially true. 

“It’s the nest,” He yawns again, “I swear my heats are like ten times better here,” 

“I think it’s more you,”

“Nah,” Wooyoung ruffles your hair, “it’s the bamboo cooling sheets, I know all the tricks,” 

He makes you laugh softly again, but this time he shifts under you completely to adjust his position underneath you and when he brings his leg up, pushing his thigh against your core harder, your fingers tighten on his arms and you can’t help the soft moan that escapes from your lips. 

He freezes entirely, the room quiet. 

“S-sorry,” You exhale tightly, starting to push yourself up from your nestled place on his chest so you can try and find his eyes and see how uncomfortable this is about to be. 

“Why didn’t you say?” His hands slip under the hem of your shirt, stroking the bare skin of your lower back. 

“Let me,” As much as you don’t want to, you start to push your body up and away from him, but he catches you in his arms and brings you back down to his chest, “Woo,” 

“Do you like kissing?” He asks out of nowhere, his hand pushing into your hair and guiding your gaze to his. 

“What?” You blink. 

“You’re so tense,” He studies your face, applying a little pressure where he holds you to guide you back down into a fully comfortable position, “it’s just me,” 

“But,” You say, words falling flat. You don’t have a reason why or an explanation, it’s just that his hands on you like this is so unexpected. You called Seonghwa, you expected Seonghwa, Wooyoung nestled between your thighs is a wild card. 

“Shh,” He soothes you, hand splaying wide on your skin, “relax, babe, it’s only me,” 

You can barely move, your stomach clenching painfully and your clit all but throbbing against him. You’ve never had sex with another omega, certainly not in heat, but something about his scent and his comforting tone and his hot thigh against your cunt is making the idea of a knot fade from your mind. 

“You really are so pretty,” He smiles, his opposite hand shifting lower to slip under the elastic of your sleep pants, “and you smell so delicious,” 

“Y-Yeah?” 

His hand bypasses the hem of your underwear too and he cups your ass, “Like something sugary,” 

“Honey,” You murmur, the briefest flash of Mingi’s mouth on your throat in your mind’s eye. 

“That’s it,” Wooyoung nods, his voice a soft murmur when he says, “do you taste like honey too?” 

You sigh, hazy feeling against him, warmth in your cheeks. 

“Can I kiss you? Or would that be too weird?” Wooyoung slowly drags you up a little so he can reach your mouth a little better in his reclined position, but he doesn’t move to lock his lips to yours. 

It sounds like it should be weird, especially given how well things turned out between you and Yunho and Mingi, but something about Wooyoung just deflates all the pressure in the room and you’ve never felt more comfortable. 

You nod, and he gathers you close so that you’re laying fully over him. 

“Did you sleep well?” He murmurs softly, nuzzling your nose with his and pressing the briefest, featherlight kiss to your lips. 

“Yeah,” You breathe, your eyes slipping closed as he nuzzles you again. 

“You seem good too,” He comments, letting his lips travel along your jaw until he finds your earlobe and gives it a gentle tug with his teeth. 

Your body twitches in response and you nod against his head. 

“Not in pain?” He checks, his hand once again slipping inside your sleep pants to cup your bare backside. 

“N-not right now,” You murmur. 

“Good,” His lips press against yours, a little longer this time. His lips are so warm, and he alternates between steady kisses and nuzzles, just getting you used to the feeling of his mouth on yours. 

All the while, your body melts down, muscles relaxing one by one. 

Wooyoung sighs warmly against you, his next kiss a little more open, coaxing your mouth to follow. Your stomach erupts in needy little butterflies, and then his tongue is in your mouth. 

“Oh,” You sigh pleasantly and he wraps his arms tighter around you. 

“You feel so good,” He groans, his hands searching your skin under your clothes. 

“S-so do you,” You stammer, your words whispered in the barely there space between you. 

The air is starting to feel thicker around you, warm and hazy, but your body shivers like there’s a chill in the room and you know it’s your heat running you hot and cold. Wooyoung reaches for the comforter, pulling it up and over the two of you so that you’re wrapped tighter in the building warmth. Your hips buck softly as he nips your lip and he nods. 

“Yeah?” He murmurs between kisses and caresses, “How do you feel?” 

Your brain is feeling buzzy and hot and you smile against his mouth, “Fucking horny,” 

He laughs, cupping your cheek as he kisses you again, this time deeper and laden with so much innuendo you think you might just come on the spot. 

You moan into his mouth, and slowly he raises his knee and plants his foot, effectively angling his thigh perfectly right between yours so that you’re straddling him tightly, every rock of your bodies just forcing your cunt closer to him. 

“Come on,” He urges you softly, pressing his hand into your hip and coaxing you into it. 

You follow this press of his hands and push your hips forwards, moaning into him immediately. “Fuck,” You pant against his cheek. 

“Yeah?” He chuckles, dragging your hips back and forth again, coaxing you into a rhythm. 

You nod, lips falling away from his as you collapse over him, eyes slipping closed as you bury your face into the side of his neck. He smells heavenly, and you let that sensation wrap around you as you continue canting your hips and dragging yourself back and forth across his thigh. You can feel the heat radiating off him even through the layers of fabric between you, his sleep pants, yours, and your panties, and you’re sure that you’re soaking through them with every grind of your hips. 

Your head is getting cottony as pleasure starts arcing up your spine, and you feel Wooyoung hold you closer, his lips against your ear. You hear something squeak behind you, and feel the air in the room change, but you don’t stop, you just keep rolling your hips and finding solace in his arms. 

Wooyoung murmurs something, but you don’t quite catch it and you make a soft noise to get him to repeat himself but he doesn’t. The comforter moves from its position draped over you, and the bed shifts. Your hips stop and you blink your eyes open, realizing that you’re not alone in the room anymore. The comforter still covers both of you from the waist down, but anyone could surely tell what you and Wooyoung were doing. 

“Morning,” Seonghwa’s warm, low alpha tone sends a shiver up your spine. 

“Hey,” Wooyoung keeps his voice quiet too, his fingers tracing up and down your back. 

“Everything okay in here?” Seonghwa asks. 

“Mhm,” Wooyoung’s hand slips out of your sleep pants and rests casually on your hip, “we just woke up,” 

“Did she sleep through the night?” He sounds a little surprised. 

“Mhm,” Wooyoung replies. 

“I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Seonghwa’s voice is soothing, and you sigh when his hand smooths over your hair, “I heard you rustling around and wanted to make sure you weren’t in any pain,” 

“I’m okay,” You assure him, your eyes already getting heavy at the feeling of them both touching you. 

Wooyoung’s thigh tenses between yours and you let out a little shuddering breath. 

“You don’t sound very okay,” Seonghwa murmurs, and your body responds to his tone in a second with a rush of morning slick. Wooyoung chuckles under you at the growing wet patch on his sweats. 

“Don’t laugh,” You slap his chest lightly, “I’m in heat, I can’t help it,” 

“What’s funny?” Seonghwa asks, a smile in his voice. 

“Oh, nothing,” You can practically see the grin on his face, “just one second of you playing sexy concerned alpha and she’s slicking all over me,” 

“Woo!” You press your eyes closed, blush lighting up your neck and cheeks. 

“Don’t tease her like that,” Seonghwa tuts, “that’s not nice,” 

“Maybe she likes not nice,” Wooyoung smirks. 

“Will you two stop that,” You groan, and it feels like even though you’re not getting any friction, the pressure against your clit alone is enough to make the bubble in your belly grow and grow, “I was so close,” 

You don’t mean for your voice to sound so needy, but it does. 

Seonghwa’s alpha responds immediately, and even though you hear Wooyoung chuckle again, he keeps his mouth shut this time. Seonghwa shushes you, pulling back the comforter completely so he can see the way you two are tangled together and then he gets closer, “Oh, jagiya, I’m sorry, let me help,” 

A soft whine leaves you as he takes you in his hands and lifts you away from Wooyoung’s chest. 

“Can you take your bottoms off for me, or do you need a little help, darling?” Seonghwa’s body being so close is making your mind do little somersaults, but you still have control over yourself well enough to shift on the bed and reach for your waistband. 

It’s an awkward position, poised over Wooyoung while Seonghwa holds you in his arms, but Wooyoung reaches out and helps drag your sleep pants off, catching your underwear with his thumbs to pull them away too. 

“Wow,” Wooyoung breathes as your panties pull away, revealing just how slick and puffy you are. 

“That better be a good wow,” You sigh, letting your head fall back onto Seonghwa’s waiting shoulder. 

“Oh, it definitely is,” Wooyoung says, moving around underneath you to kick off his own sleep pants. 

Seonghwa reaches around you then, his hand coming to close over your sex, and then he hums pleasantly, “What a lovely omega, you are,” 

You shudder at his praise, hips pressing down to feel more of his hand, hoping that he’ll slip his fingers inside, but he simply drags his hand up and away and leaves you pulsing with desire. 

“Oh, god,” You groan, “please someone do something,” 

Wooyoung reaches up for you, gathering you back down and Seonghwa supports your slow descent as you get back into position over Wooyoung’s thigh. This time the sensation is instant, his hot skin under yours, and your mind instantly curls back into hazy pleasure with the first rock of your hips. 

“Perfect,” Seonghwa hums, “look at you two,” 

Wooyoung drags your hips along, but laughs sharply at Seonghwa, “Relax, alpha,” he punctuates the word with his tone, “I know this is like, your wet dream, but listen to her… she needs to come,” 

You do, you really, really do. You don’t know what will get you there, but so far you’re dancing on the edge of your pleasure but unable to fully grasp it. Wooyoung feels hot and perfect beneath you, and Seonghwa is saying all the right things to delight the primal part of your brain, but every time you feel close to the edge you fall away from it. 

Frustrated tears gather in your eyes and you bite down on your cheek to keep from crying out in equal irritation at yourself and your body. 

“Hush,” Seonghwa soothes you, his hands sweeping up and down your bare back, “we’re right here, darling,” 

“I can’t,” You work your hips faster against Wooyoung’s thigh, “I’m so…” 

“Tell us what you need, babe,” Wooyoung’s hand dips under your shirt, finding your breast and softly teasing your nipple. 

You moan sharply as pleasure bubbles through you, not quite there but close, “Kiss me, please, please,” 

His mouth is on yours in a second, tongue against yours and everything just hot pants between you both.

Seonghwa’s hands squeeze your hips and you moan as he talks you through it, “That’s it, omega, make yourself come, fuck Youngie’s pretty thigh,” 

You choke out a tight cry into Wooyoung’s mouth. 

“You’re so close,” Seonghwa continues, “so wet, pretty girl,” 

“Oh fuck, fuck,” You fall away from Wooyoung’s mouth, dropping your forehead to his, your hips picking up the pace just a bit, just enough to get you there. 

Wooyoung groans at the sight of you, pushing your hair out of your faces and holding you against him, nodding against your sweat slick skin, “Come,” 

“I’m,” You choke, “I’m…” 

Seonghwa’s hands coast over you, and his next words undo you, “I can’t wait to bury myself in that sweet cunt,” 

Your hips snap forward, your orgasm crashing into you like a wall and you collapse against Wooyoung as it takes you under. Seonghwa reaches his hand around your shuddering thighs and pushes his fingers between your dripping folds and Wooyoung’s slick leg, locating your clit with ease and working his hand fast back and forth to prolong your orgasm. 

You squeak, eyes slamming shut, gripping down on Wooyoung’s shoulders and you’d fall to the side if it weren’t for the two of them holding you steady through the crash of pleasure. 

“That’s it, that’s it,” Seonghwa hums. 

“Oh my god, oh, yes babe,” Wooyoung peppers kisses over your face as your shakes start to transform into little trembling rushes, “mm, I bet that felt so good, didn’t it?” 

You’re nodding, just now coming to the realization that Seonghwa’s hands aren’t between your thighs anymore, you’ve just been dragging your throbbing clit back and forth lazily over Wooyoung’s leg until you’re sated. Your body slows, now just trembling in the afterglow. They’re touching you still, just softly, a lazy bit of aftercare in the morning sun and you sigh across Wooyoung’s chest. 

“Good morning,” Seonghwa chuckles. 

“It is a good morning,” You grin, your head feeling decidedly less foggy after the orgasm and you hide your face in Wooyoung’s chest for a second as you laugh. 

“So ridiculous,” Wooyoung kisses your shoulder and laughs with you, his leg sliding to straighten and effectively dropping you down closer to the bed. 

With a sigh you roll off him and cover your face with your hands, “That was so nice,” 

“You might not even need me,” Seonghwa hums, a little playful pout in his voice as he prods your hip. 

You drop your hands instantly and reach for him, “Mm, Hwa don’t be jealous, I literally woke up on top of him,” 

“Like a clingy space heater,” Wooyoung jokes and you slap his arm. 

Seonghwa smiles, easing himself down next to you both and propping his head up on one hand, “Feeling alright?” 

“I’m so good now,” You confess. 

Wooyoung chuckles and snuggles up to your back, tucking you into him again and taking his hand to tangle your fingers together. 

“Mm,” Seonghwa sighs, brushing Wooyoung’s hair back from his cheek as he looks down at you both, “this really is such a nice surprise,” 

“Mhm,” 

“I think we should get you a nice big breakfast,” Seonghwa smiles, “are you hungry?” 

“A little,” 

Wooyoung’s hand slips out of yours and dips under your oversized shirt, closing over your belly, “Hungry for food?” 

“Shush,” You elbow him. 

“I don’t know,” He nuzzles you, “you seemed pretty insatiable this morning,” 

Blush flushes your cheeks. 

“Maybe you need more,” He nips at your ear and you gasp. 

Reason floods your mind though, and you shake your head, “Woo, no,” 

He stills immediately and angles up to look at you, “What’s up?”

“Can we just talk first? Before this gets messy?” You ask, “Well, messier,” 

His hands are off you in any suggestive way a moment later, and Seonghwa slides off the bed to locate your sleep pants and pass them over to you, “Let’s go make breakfast together and talk,” 

“Okay, good, yes,” You pull on your sleep pants and ease yourself off the bed, Seonghwa’s hand sliding to your arm like a magnet. 

“What are you in the mood for?” Wooyoung pulls open the door to the bedroom, injecting the nest with a cold flush of air and you shiver at the way the feeling of the room changes when you’re not holed up in a mix of their scents. 

“Do you have any fruit?” You ask him, “something light?” 

He nods, “Hwa, can I take care of the food this time?” 

“Sure,” He steps closer to your back, hands not quite holding you, but resting on you in whatever way he can. 

Wooyoung disappears into the kitchen, pulling out various ingredients from the fridge and a cutting board from the cupboard. You notice immediately that he’s quick with a knife, easily dicing up the food, and it’s a little mesmerizing to watch the way he works. Seonghwa watches too, a fond smile on his lips. 

“So,” Seonghwa finally says, turning towards you, “what’s on your mind?”

You ease back onto the living room sofa and tuck your legs in, “I just feel like we’re supposed to talk about this,” 

“It’s a good idea,” Wooyoung assures you, dropping off a plate of expertly cut fruit and glasses of ice water. 

“Mm,” Seonghwa nods, popping a strawberry in his mouth, “we’ve been doing this for so long together I think we forget a bit how familiar we already are,” 

“How long has it been?” You reach for the plate of fruit but Seonghwa pushes your hands away with a soft sound. 

You watch as he piles a plate high with an assortment for you, “Two years? Three?” 

“Three,” Wooyoung says from the kitchen, “y/n, do you want any coffee?”

You shake your head, “Not this morning, thank you,” 

“What about you?” Seonghwa prompts. 

“My heats?” You clarify. 

“Mhm,” He turns towards you fully, listening and attentive, “what about you?” 

Wooyoung takes the seat on the sofa across from you and drops a coffee in front of Seonghwa. 

“Outside of Yunho and Mingi, I’ve never really done the whole casual heat sex thing,” You explain, “I was never very comfortable with it,” 

“I get that,” Wooyoung nods, taking a bite of melon, “it’s hard to know who to trust,” 

“All the time,” You agree with ease. 

Seonghwa frowns, “I wish it weren’t that way,” 

“I know,” Wooyoung shrugs, “but not all alphas are as nice as you and Sannie, that’s just the truth,” 

A shiver runs up your back, you know that all too well and so does Wooyoung. Sometimes not as nice just means pretty words at night and a cold bed in the morning, but sometimes not as nice means so much more. You wonder how many shared experiences you and Wooyoung have had over the course of your lives as omegas. 

Seonghwa’s jaw jumps tightly, his hand on the table pressing into a loose fist and you can feel the tense stress of him at the idea. 

“I hope,” Seonghwa swallows and then looks to you, “that at least San and I have never made you feel uncomfortable,” 

“Never,” You answer fast. 

“And everyone else at the office is,” He trails off, looking to Wooyoung for a little help, “that’s not a problem at work is it?” 

Wooyoung shakes his head and keeps eating, treating this whole sudden twist of the conversation so casually, “I get looks sometimes, you know, but no it’s not a problem,” 

“Agreed,” You take a bite of your breakfast too, “looks I can deal with,” 

“I’m sorry,” Seonghwa says quietly. 

“It’s not your fault,” You shake your head, “but this is why I haven’t really gotten out much. Honestly, I hope you know that it means a lot to me that I felt comfortable enough to call you. Think about that, not the bad stuff,” 

“She’s right,” Wooyoung sips his coffee, “but you know the other thing that just sucks but is true?” 

“Hmm?” You pull your eyes away from Seonghwa to look at him. 

“Alphas will just leave you alone when they know you’re even rumored to be with another alpha,” Wooyoung says, “I haven’t had to deal with any shit in so long and that’s all Sannie and you,” 

“I hate that,” Seonghwa grumbles. 

“It’s true though,” You shrug, and then a thought occurs to you, “wait,” 

They do, glancing between each other as you gather your thoughts. 

“Could you tell I had been with Yunho and Mingi?” You ask, a little afraid of the answer, “if I hadn't told you, would you have known anyways?” 

“Not in the way you’re thinking,” Seonghwa says, “I don’t know, it’s hard to explain. I couldn’t tell until we were close together during dance practice, and even then it wasn’t like I caught a specific person’s scent, we were never close enough for that. It was more just the feeling that you weren’t…. unscented?” 

“Mm,” You bite the inside of your cheek, thinking it through. 

“Relax,” Wooyoung squeezes your hand, “stressing about things you can’t control isn’t going to make your heat any easier,” 

“I can’t help it,” 

“Here,” Seonghwa pushes back his chair and reaches for you, “come sit with me a second, I can feel you worrying from here,” 

You shift over from your chair and follow the guidance of his hands until you’re settled in his lap. It should feel awkward, but it doesn’t and you don’t really spend any time worrying about that now that you’re wrapped up in an alpha’s warm arms. 

“Now,” Seonghwa’s hand strokes your thigh slowly, “we’re all friends here, right?” 

“Yes?” You twist to catch his eyes. 

“Then I just want you to relax,” He gives you a squeeze, “Woo and I will take care of you for the rest of the weekend, and on Monday or Tuesday when you go back to the studio everything will be fine. Yunho and Mingi will be whatever they are, but that isn’t your worry, that’s theirs.” 

“And us?” You ask softly. 

“We’ll be fine,” He says with ease, “y/n, listen, I don’t know what they said or didn’t say to you but I can guarantee it wasn’t clear.” 

You nod. 

“We’re friends, and Woo I’ll let you speak for yourself, but that’s all I’m interested in being. I’d like to help you this weekend, and then if in the future we end up sleeping together again? That’s fine, but as friends.” Seonghwa is so crystal clear you feel the floor giving under you. This is what you thought you had with Yunho and Mingi all those weeks ago, but in the face of actual clarity you can see how muddled and lost the three of you had been back then. 

“That’s…” You search for the words, “such a relief, honestly,” 

“Good,” Seonghwa smooths his thumb across the gland in your wrist. 

“Me too,” Wooyoung jumps in, “actual no strings attached friend sex is the best kind,” 

“You think so?” You shuffle back a little further onto Seonghwa’s lap. 

“I know so,” Wooyoung says, “actually just being yourself and then not spending fucking days anxiously waiting for a phone call? Yeah, it’s better,” 

“God, this is easier,” You sink back against Seonghwa’s chest and then glance at him, “is this okay?” 

“Yes,” He assures you, wrapping an arm around your middle and holding you to him, “it’s nice, actually.” 

“Does this mean we can spend the rest of the weekend in bed, then?” Wooyoung grins. 

“I guess it does,” You laugh. 

“y/n,” Seonghwa starts from behind you, shifting a little underneath you and you can hear the difference in his voice suddenly at the thought of bed, “are you still hungry?” 

“I don’t think so,” You murmur, deeply aware of the way his hands have started to shift to your hips. 

“I’m still a little hungry,” He confesses, and you watch as he starts to pull up the hem of your t-shirt, “starving actually,” 

“Oh,” You can already feel blush creeping up your cheeks. 

He lifts your shirt more, his hands brushing up and down your stomach gently as he lets you recline onto his chest, and then his fingers creep higher, just barely brushing the underside of your breasts, “Is this okay?” 

“Mhm,” You answer, breathy and tight. 

“Is this?” He lifts the shirt higher, dragging the material up over your bare breasts and drawing your nipples to attention. 

You manage a nod against his shoulder. 

“And this?” His thumb strokes over your nipple directly now. 

“Yes,” You shudder. 

Wooyoung sighs across the room, drawing your attention and you watch as he licks his lips, sliding his hand into his boxer briefs. When his hand starts to bob underneath the fabric you moan softly, gripping down on Seonghwa’s thigh under your hand. 

“Let’s go to bed,” Seonghwa kisses your temple and drops your shirt, “right now,” 

Instantly you’re aching, scrambling off his lap and ready to go wherever he’ll take you just as long as he keeps talking to you like that. 

Wooyoung whines quietly, pulling his hand back, but you’re on the sudden same page of needing to get to a bed and needing to get to one fast. 

Seonghwa pulls you along until you’re in the room again, and Wooyoung shuts the door behind you. Your head starts to get dizzy again with the heat and the warmth of them both, and Seonghwa only makes it worse when he tugs your shirt up over your head and palms your breast, “You’re so soft, jagi,” 

Your mouth runs dry, and once again Wooyoung pulls the tie on your sleep pants and tugs them off you as he kisses your bare shoulder. 

“Look at you,” Seonghwa hums appreciatively, “so very pretty,” 

Your body pulses, the tone of his voice and the warmth bubbling everything back up inside you fast, “Please,” 

“Lie back,” He maneuvers you to the bed, and you follow his instructions. 

Wooyoung eases down next to you, tossing off his own shirt as he does. 

“You’ve been slick all morning,” Seonghwa says as he descends over you, kissing across your jaw and down your neck, “do you know how badly I wanted to just bend you over?”

“F-fuck,” You choke, “alpha, please,” 

He widens your legs with one hand, settling himself lower over you as he teases you with his lips, tongue, teeth, enhancing every little sensation with his words, “You make such pretty sounds, I almost knotted you on the breakfast table,” 

“Oh my god,” Your back arches naturally, pressing yourself into him, “Hwa, oh my god,” 

“Shush,” Seonghwa kisses down your bare chest, nuzzling your sternum as his hand starts to travel from its place near your knee up your inner thigh, creeping dangerously close to your core. 

“He’s good at this,” Wooyoung tells you softly, his fingers ever so gently teasing your pert nipple. 

“Woo,” Seonghwa sighs a breath of hot air across your belly, “leave a little to the imagination, hmm?” 

Wooyoung snorts, “Touchy,” 

Your body is starting to ache, neediness starting to curl open inside you and you huff softly, “I’m going to be touchy in a minute,” 

Seonghwa groans, “Don’t tell me I adopted another brat,” 

“I’m on my b-best behavior,” Your voice catches as his fingers finally part your slick folds, “but I am in heat.” 

“Yes, you are, aren’t you?” Seonghwa nips at your hip bone, his lips traveling to your inner thighs as he sinks to his knees between your splayed knees, “Positively aching,” 

“Oh,” You shiver, two of his fingers finally pushing inside your slick channel. 

“You’re not quite ready for a knot yet though,” He comments softly. 

“I know something that might help with that,” You smile, spreading your legs wider for him. 

“I bet you do,” Seonghwa’s eyebrow quirks, his hand pulling back and thrusting forward in a pulse, his thumb dragging warm circles over your clit. 

The reaction of your body is instantaneous, a quick rush of slick and a dizzy wash of pleasure up your spine as you let your head fall back into Wooyoung’s waiting palm. 

“Told you,” Wooyoung whispers, and he kisses you fast, trapping your laugh between your lips. 

Seonghwa grins, the pace of his hand perfect and sure and you’re already feeling the dizzy sparks of a building orgasm up your spine when the sharp sound of a doorbell brings you all out of it. You and Wooyoung break apart and his brows knit together in confusion, “Who’s here?” 

“No idea,” Seonghwa waits a moment, but then comes a knock. 

You’re shivering, feeling fucked already and you blink hard, wetting your lips and trying to shake off the cloudy feeling inside your brain. 

“Sorry,” Seonghwa gives you a face and slowly pulls his fingers from you, “let me just see what’s going on,” 

“Sure,” You sigh, watching as he jogs to the bathroom to rinse off his hands before getting to the door. 

“Woo,” Your hands reflexively cover yourself, “do you have something I can wear?” 

“Yeah, come here,” He pulls you to a sitting position and crosses the room for the robe hanging on the back of the door, long and dark gray and plush. 

As you wrap yourself up in it, Wooyoung tosses on a pullover and gives you a smile, communicating silently that you should just relax while he and Seonghwa go investigate. 

You flop back against the bedding and sigh, fighting the urge to squeeze your thighs together. You should check your phone, you should just suck it up and text Yunho and Mingi back, but before you get up the resolve you hear a new voice from the main room of the apartment. 

“Where have you been?” San. 

“Didn’t you get my voicemail?” Seonghwa asks. 

“I saw you called,” San says, and you pull yourself up from the bed to creep closer to the hall, “but you didn’t answer any of my texts,” 

“Right…” Seonghwa draws out, “because I called?”

“Sannie,” Wooyoung sighs, “we didn’t go missing, we’ve just been,” 

“Is your heat early?” San interrupts suddenly, “why didn’t you call me?” 

You creep around the doorframe just a little more and you smile when you see San cupping Wooyoung’s cheeks, Seonghwa all but rolling his eyes behind him. 

Wooyoung makes an annoyed noise and pushes his sometimes lover’s hands away, “We did call you, now will you listen for two seconds?” 

“If I knew you were in heat I would have come straight over,” San pushes forwards. 

“Well that’s nice,” Wooyoung disentangles himself and keeps an arm’s length between him and his alpha, “but Sannie, I’m not in heat. Not even a little,” 

“But,” San looks confused. 

You step out a little further into the room, arms wrapped around yourself even though the robe drowns you, “He’s not, but I am,” 

San snaps around with a start, “y/n!” 

“Hey, San,” You give him a small wave. 

“I didn’t know you were here,” He says. 

“I was trying to tell you,” Seonghwa laughs, “can’t you tell Wooyoungie’s scent from hers?” 

“Of course he can,” Wooyoung slaps Seonghwa across the arm, “ass.” 

San sputters, falling silent and his eyes narrowing a little at his friend, and it’s clear as crystal what the vibe between the three of them is, even when heat is concerned. 

“Speaking of heat,” Seonghwa meets your eyes from across their little dining room nook table that stands between you, them, and the kitchen, “are you alright? Should you be up?” 

“I’m fine, Hwa,” You assure him with a smile, taking a few more steps forwards and raising your arms as if to show him, “really, this one’s a lot easier.” 

San clears his throat and you can see him divert his eyes from you deliberately, a little blush up his cheeks, “So, this is why you haven’t been answering your phones,” 

“Pretty much,” Wooyoung laughs. 

“I didn’t mean to interrupt,” He says, locking eyes with Seonghwa. 

“Sannie,” Seonghwa’s voice softens a little, and he gives him the smallest shake of the head. 

You can feel the disappointment coming off of San in waves, and you can’t quite place the source except to assume that this has always been their thing, not yours. Your mouth feels a little dry as you watch them silently communicate with each other, and you take the second to realize just how much your hips are aching, legs feeling heavy, and your cramps are still deeply uncomfortable no matter how much better they are from last time. Seonghwa edging you really hasn’t helped though, and now you’re starting to feel a little desperate for relief, sweat breaking out along your hairline. 

“It was kind of sudden,” Wooyoung jumps in between the two of them, smoothing over the moment of tension with ease, “right, y/n?” 

You nod, securing the robe around you a little more tightly, “I really…” you start with a breath, “I honestly didn’t mean to intrude on this.” You gesture to the three of them and take a few steps forward. It’s not like you can really offer to leave at this point, but it feels like all you can really say. 

San doesn’t let you feel those nerves for long though, his face clears and he shakes his head, “No, honestly, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for it to sound that way. You’re not intruding, you know that,” 

Your hands rest on the back of one of the dining room chairs as you look between them, “As long as that’s true,” you worry your lip, “I had a hard enough time with Mingi and Yunho… if I ever did anything to hurt my friendship with you, I wouldn’t forgive myself.” 

“Don’t think like that,” Seonghwa assures you, “not with us,” 

“He’s right,” San nods, “I should have just listened to my voicemail,” 

“Good,” You sigh, “that’s good.” 

Wooyoung’s eyes flick over you and then he hums, “Do you want some tea, babe? You look a little pale,” 

You nod immediately, “That would be so perfect,” 

“I’ll get it,” Seonghwa stops Wooyoung as he moves towards the kitchen, “you both rest, I’ll take care of it,” 

Wooyoung grins, “I’m not in heat, I can help,” 

Seonghwa makes a noise and shrugs, “Just let me dote for a minute, would you?” 

Wooyoung laughs sharply in response and the tension dissipates just like that, San’s expression relaxing into an easy smile as he watches the exchange. 

“Thank you, Seonghwa,” You murmur, nudging Wooyoung in the ribs as you do. 

Seonghwa disappears around the corner into the kitchen and you hear the sound of the electric kettle start up, and San finally lets his bag drop to the floor and his shoulders relax as he says, “How are you doing, then?” 

“Good,” You smile, “much better than last time,” 

“Mm,” San nods, “I’m glad to hear it,” 

The silence stretches between you for a moment and then you find yourself asking without a second thought, “Did you go into the studio today?” 

None of you had any set schedules or meetings today, but San is there more days than not regardless of schedule. 

Wooyoung glances to you, knowing exactly what you’re asking but keeps his mouth shut. 

“This morning,” San nods, “I just left a little while ago and I was running some errands before I stopped over,” 

“Ah,” You nod, “how was it?” 

“The studio?” His brows knit together in confusion, “Same as always,” 

“Jesus,” Wooyoung rolls his eyes, “she’s asking if you saw Yunho and Mingi, if things were weird?” 

“They weren’t in,” San replies, and then things seem to click together, “do they know you’re here?” 

You shake your head, stomach twisting up in knots inside you. 

“Do you not want them to know?” San asks. 

“I… don’t really know,” You confess. 

“Well,” San shrugs, “I didn’t see them, but if I do see them later, I won’t mention you. You can decide what you want them to know and when.” 

“Thank you, San,” You murmur. 

The knotting nervousness in your stomach doubles at the thought that they didn’t go into work today, even just a little in the morning when you know they almost always do. Where were they? Were they looking for you? Wondering about you? Thinking of you? You picture Mingi at your apartment door, trying to explain to your roommates who he is and what he’s doing there and finding out that instead of being able to swoop in and take care of you… you’re gone. 

A cramp lights up your back and your hand flies to your stomach as you double over, jaw locked down tight at the sudden wave of discomfort. 

“Hey, easy, easy,” San has an arm around you instantly, holding you upright and supporting you better than the chair could, “you’re okay,” 

Your head rocks to the side, resting on his chest and you take a deep, necessary breath against the soft cotton of his t-shirt. He smells floral, the thought strikes you suddenly and starkly, more heady than most other alphas scents and you take another breath to let the scent of him wash over you. Jasmine hits you first, its sharp musk making you a little dizzy until you catch the underlying warmth of sandalwood. Your body relaxes into him naturally and he chuckles as he feels your trembling muscles unclench under his hands. 

“San,” You murmur into his chest, the sound muffled. 

“Hmm?” 

“Can you help me to the couch?” You lean into him. 

“Mhm,” He shifts and suddenly you’re in his arms entirely, “let’s sit,” 

“Hyung, how’s that tea?” Wooyoung calls into the kitchen, and you feel his soft hand coast down the length of your arm as he shifts past you and San to try and help. 

“Almost,” Seonghwa calls back, “she okay?” 

“I’m fine,” You tell the room, “it’s just a cramp,” 

“Here we go,” San says softly as he settles you down on the couch, “let me help,” 

He shifts to sit behind you, his hands finding your lower back and he presses into your aching spine with his thumbs, kneading and massaging perfect circles into your body. You sigh, the overwhelming relief flooding you as he helps take away the immediate sharp soreness of your hips. What your body needs is a knot, but this combined with the warm scents of both alphas is a start. 

Seonghwa returns a moment later, a mug of bright red tea in hand and he maneuvers the warm cup into your waiting fingers. 

“What’s this?” You ask, dipping your head to smell the steaming liquid. 

“Raspberry leaf,” He replies. 

“Don’t you drink this for your heat?” Wooyoung flops onto the other couch that faces yours and quirks an eyebrow. 

“Should I be?” You let the warm berry scent pass through you, the cup warming your chilly hands. 

“Yes?” Wooyoung shakes his head, looking almost appalled, “it really helps regulate your hormones, helps with intensity spikes, is an anti-inflammatory, and promotes fertility.” 

“Fertility isn’t really the goal here, Woo,” You snort. 

“It is if it means your cycle is easier to deal with,” He dismisses, “you’re now on a Wooyoung prescribed two cups a day,” 

“Fine, fine,” You take a gentle sip, testing the heat, “but I’m not drinking this because of your speech I’m drinking it because it smells good,” 

“Whatever you say, babe,” Wooyoung rolls his eyes, gesturing for you to drink up. 

San continues gently kneading your back as you take your first proper sip of the tea and Seonghwa settles on the sofa next to you. He brushes your hair back softly with his hand and gives you a smile, “After this, let’s get you back to bed,” 

You nod into your cup, “I’d like that,” 

“Do you normally spend your heats alone?” San asks, his hands slowing but still not lifting off your body, now just resting on your lower hips. 

“Usually,” You take another sip. 

“I could never,” Wooyoung grimaces, “that’s not fun, that’s just torture,” 

“Heat isn’t really fun,” You laugh, “it’s just a thing.” 

“You seemed to have a good time with Yunho and Mingi,” Wooyoung wags his eyebrows. 

“Yeah, well, we all know how that one turned out,” You grimace. 

“Relax,” Seonghwa smooths a hand over your knee through the fabric of the robe, “Youngie, leave her be.” 

“Didn’t you ever want help?” San asks. 

You chew the inside of your lip, “I guess, but my heats off suppressants are really intense and on them… I mean, usually I can handle it, so I handle it,” 

“You’re a strong person,” San comments softly, giving your hip a squeeze as he shifts to start massaging your back again. 

You almost muster a reply, but Wooyoung takes the attention of the room again with a groan, “I couldn’t do that, I tried once and it was awful,” 

“What are your heats like, anyways?” You ask, leaning a little on Seonghwa’s shoulder as San keeps working your tired muscles. 

“Oh, he’s the worst,” Seonghwa smiles, “constant begging the minute he starts slicking up,” 

“Oh shut up,” Wooyoung grumbles. 

“I’m just telling the truth,” Seonghwa laughs. 

Another light cramp pulses through you and you exhale softly, taking another sip of tea. San’s hands pause, and he leans around you to watch your face, but Seonghwa and Wooyoung keep on bickering. 

“Should I tell y/n how we found you last time you went into heat?” Seonghwa grins. 

“I’ll literally kill you, Hwa,” Wooyoung tosses a pillow hard and it collides with Seonghwa’s chest. 

“Not a very nice way to treat your alpha,” Seonghwa replies, his hand leaving your knee as he goes to toss the pillow back. 

“Maybe you’ll have to punish me later,” Wooyoung slaps the flying pillow out of the air so it lands smoothly back on the couch and gives Seonghwa a flirty smile, tongue against his teeth. 

“Maybe I will,” 

Your stomach locks up, core pulsing lightly and you suddenly feel stifled in the room, hot and cold all at the same time. You make a soft, tense noise and the cup in your fingers tips to the side, losing some of the tea as you try to recover it.

  “Shh,” San plucks the cup from your hands and sets it on the table, curling around to your side, “it’s alright,” 

“Ow,” You manage, pressing a palm down over your stomach. 

San smooths his hand along yours and catches your eyes, “You’re alright, omega,” 

Something inside you melts and he gently strokes the gland in your neck with his opposite hand, nodding as you start to relax from the immediate surge of pain and arousal. 

“Jagiya,” Seonghwa strokes your skin, “let’s go to bed,” 

“Please,” your eyes flutter shut. 

“Then I should go,” San clears his throat, his hands starting to lift away from you, “I’ll leave you three to,”

You don’t know what possesses you, but you reach for him the minute his skin leaves yours, eyes flying open as you grab his hands and shake your head, “Don’t go,” 

His eyes blow wide, “y/n,” 

“Why not?” You glance at Wooyoung and Seonghwa, a little panicked now that the trajectory of this is uncertain, but all you know is that you’d like him to stay. You squeeze San’s hands, “You’re here, we’re all here, I mean… why not stay?” 

His eyes flick past you to Seonghwa, holding a question you don’t understand. 

“If you don’t want to,” The words leave you in a rush, at the sinking realization that he may not want any of this. 

San looks back to you in a flash, “It’s not that,” 

Relief blooms inside you, “It’s not?” 

“Not at all,” He smooths down your hair and tries to ease you, “but are you sure?” 

“Sure,” You nod, “really,” 

His eyes flick over you, and you can feel him considering his next move, but then he nods. 

You end up right back where you were when the doorbell rang twenty minutes ago, only this time you have San on your right while Wooyoung teases you on your left and Seonghwa rests between your thighs. Distantly in the back of your brain, the part that’s still rational and sarcastic, you wonder if your brain is broken now and your omega needs two alphas to feel sated. 

“I won’t make you wait,” Seonghwa suddenly says, sinking down and attaching his mouth to your aching sex without any further preamble, and it pulls you sharply out of your own thoughts. 

“Oh, fuck,” You groan, your hips jerking at the sudden spark of sensation. 

“So sensitive,” Seonghwa hums appreciatively, locating your clit with the hardened tip of his tongue and flicking it firmly. 

You mutter something, head already fogging up, and San brushes his fingers along your arm, “Can I touch you, omega?” He murmurs, his voice thickening, getting huskier. 

You nod fast, holding his gaze to let him know he’s allowed and he shifts to press lazy kisses along your chest as he watches the other alpha between your thighs. 

For all of Wooyoung’s jokes before, he’s fallen silent now. His eyes are blown wide as he watches the way both alphas touch you, and you can tell he’s torn between helping you along and helping himself. 

“Let’s get you ready for that knot, hmm?” Seonghwa kisses your mound, and you feel his fingers stroking your entrance, pushing in just slightly and then retracting to tease your body just right and let all your internal muscles unlock. 

Inside you, your omega feels like it’s finally waking. Your heat that’s been bubbling all day against the medicated ceiling of your suppressants feels like a pressure cooker now, ready to burst and leave you desperate with want. Seonghwa’s tongue returns to your swollen bud and San’s lips find your nipple, and you feel the hot wave ripple through you, “A-alpha,” 

“Right here, darling,” Seonghwa croons, thrusting two fingers deep inside you and drawing a tight moan from your lips. 

“Alpha,” You stammer, “I need it,” 

“Mhm,” 

San sighs pleasantly against your sweat slick skin, his hand stroking along your side and Seonghwa doubles his efforts, thrusting his fingers in earnest now and sucking hard on your clit. Hot pleasure strikes up your spine and you moan, head back and your eyes slipping closed as you let the feeling of their hands on you make you dizzy and wet. 

“Right there,” You pant, “alpha, y-yes, yes,” 

He hums against you and you scramble in the sheets, gripping down on Wooyoung’s forearm. 

“Woo,” San’s voice enters the mix but you barely register, the orgasm in front of you so quickly approaching that you need to reach it and reach it now. 

Wooyoung shifts next to you, and Seonghwa pulls back from you for a split second to catch his breath before the sensation in your brain pops apart like a firecracker. Seonghwa licks a deep stripe over your slit, and then secures his lips around your clit once more, alternating sharp sucks and flicks of his tongue. The air in the room tightens when San delivers a sharp lick to your pebbled nipple and then Wooyoung follows suit on your other side. 

“Oh, god,” Your eyes press closed tightly and you grip the back of San’s shirt in your desperate squirming, “I’m,” 

“Come on, baby,” Wooyoung encourages, rolling his tongue over you again, “you’re so close,”

You whine sharply, hips canting, “Please, please,” 

Seonghwa’s hands on your hips tighten, and he doesn’t change pace or pressure or anything at all, he just doesn’t stop. The bubble threatening to burst inside your belly feels hot and full and then with a rush, it pops and you shudder open into your first real heat addled orgasm. 

“Good, good,” Seonghwa’s fingers start to slow and you whine sharply. 

Wooyoung pulls off your breast with a little gasp, his face flushed pink and he meets your eyes as you start to crest upwards into another wave, but as Seonghwa’s hand slows so does the approach of what could be and you whimper, thighs quivering. 

“Oh,” Wooyoung pouts a little at you, sympathetic and understanding and he hushes you, “I got you,” 

You want more, and you know it needs to end in a knot for your body to register everything right, but in this split second you need Wooyoung more. You nod, frantic and close to tears, “Please,” 

He pushes back from you quick, rocking over the side of the bed and suddenly he’s got his hands on Seonghwa, pushing him away, “Shove over,” 

“W-what?” Seonghwa seems startled by the sudden directness of the omega and San lifts his head to see what’s happening at the sharp tone of his voice. 

“Just move,” Wooyoung drops to his knees and dips his arms under your thighs until your legs are swung up over his shoulders and he’s tugging you down the bed to move you into position. You squeak when he drags you down the bed and San laughs above you. 

“I’ve never seen you so assertive, Youngie,” He comments. 

“Shut up,” Wooyoung bites back, “she’s not done,” 

“Please, God,” Your hips jerk, angling for him to touch you, you can feel your pleasure slipping and you need him to catch it before it’s gone. 

“Not God, babe,” Wooyoung nips your thigh with his teeth and you jerk again in his hands, “but I’ll do my best,” 

“So cocky,” Seonghwa rolls his eyes, stepping back to hand over control. 

“I’ll show you how it’s done, alpha,” Wooyoung shoots him an even cockier grin, tongue against teeth, and you’re about to say something more but then he’s on you. 

Wooyoung treats your cunt like he knows every inch of it, like he’s done this for you specifically a thousand times before. Without ever asking he knows the pace you like, the way you need something inside you just to feel the weight of it, the way your mind spins when he reaches around and lays a hand over belly. 

“I can’t, oh God, oh fuck,” You scramble but he holds you steady.

  He hums warmly against you, picking up the pace of his sucks on your swollen bundle of nerves and when he feels your legs start to shake in earnest he presses up with two fingers inside you and presses down with the heel of his hand over your lower stomach. You were close before, off the back of your orgasm from Seonghwa’s tongue, but this is something else entirely and your vision whites out as your back arches. One hand fists the sheets, the other gripping down over Wooyoung’s and you can barely hear the noises you’re making but you know they must be feral. 

When he’s sure you’re coming through it, no longer seeking drawn out stimulation but instead pulling your hips back and away from his sharp tongue, he lifts away just enough to give your aching clit some relief from overstimulation. 

“You do taste like honey,” Is the first thing he says, his breath hot against your cunt as he stays between your thighs, recovering from his own lack of oxygen. 

Your body is starting to relax from the tense muscle lock up of your orgasm, and slowly your eyes start to open. 

“Holy shit,” Seonghwa breathes and your eyes flick to him. His eyes are dark, studying you both and you can see the hard line of his erection straining against his trousers. 

San brushes your sweat slick hair back from your forehead and smiles down at you, “Doing okay?” 

Words feel slow to your lips but you nod, “Mhm,” 

Wooyoung makes a little huff between your thighs and you glance down, seeing how close Seonghwa has stepped again, his fingers running through the omega’s hair. Seonghwa hums appreciatively, caressing Wooyoung as he leans against your inner thigh, “Good boy,”

Wooyoung preens, you can see the sudden warmth flooding him at the praise. 

“A very good boy,” Seonghwa croons again, “taking such good care of our pretty new omega,” 

“Thank you, alpha,” Wooyoung nuzzles into Seonghwa’s palm and for a second it feels like you’re watching something too intimate, but then he pushes back from you and drops your legs off his shoulders, “I hope you took notes,” 

Seonghwa sighs and delivers a fast, friendly smack to the back of Wooyoung’s head, their brief moment of heat dissipating with Wooyoung’s easy teasing. But Seonghwa softens again the moment he turns his attention to you, his hands gentle on your sides as he settles close, “You still in there, darling?” 

“Kind of,” You admit, still hazy, “I can’t feel my legs,” 

“Sounds about right,” San laughs as Wooyoung collapses into his side, and San swings an arm over his shoulders to let him snuggle closer.

  “You still haven’t been knotted,” Seonghwa notes softly, stroking your skin, “how are you feeling?” 

The idea of a knot sends a thrill through you, but your body feels sluggish, “Dizzy,” 

He hums softly, the tone empathetic and warm. 

“I need a few minutes,” You tell him honestly.

“Of course,” He soothes, “we’re here for you, you set the pace.” 

“That was just a lot,” 

Wooyoung grins and you roll your eyes at him. 

“It’s a marathon, not a race,” San notes. 

“I’ll just touch you a little,” Seonghwa relaxes next to you, running his fingers up and down your thigh, “you tell me when you want more,” 

“Okay,” Your voice is thready as he dips his hand between your thighs. 

“You two look good together,” San appraises, reaching across the bed to feel your skin, gentle strokes and and down your arm. 

“Do we?” You laugh a little, but something is starting to thrum again in the back of your brain. 

“Mm,” San’s hand moves a little further, cupping your breast and kneading it slowly, “a little too good,”

Seonghwa’s fingers explore you lazily, running up the soft, plush skin of your cunt but never quite getting close enough to properly tease your slit or your aching bud. He sighs pleasantly as he watches your nipples harden into peaks, “Don’t be jealous Sannie,” 

San huffs softly, and then he leans forward to press a chaste kiss to your chest, “y/n,” he murmurs, “is this alright?” 

You twitch under them, “Y-yes,” 

“She’s a puddle,” Wooyoung jokes as he catches sight of your hazy look, “are my alphas making you feel so, so good, omega?” 

Your hips jerk and Seonghwa lays his hand over your thighs to steady you. 

“More,” You nod, resting one hand on the back of San’s neck, fingertips sinking into his hair as you push his head towards your breast. 

“Like this?” He murmurs against your skin, flattening his tongue over your nipple once to lick it firmly before he closes his plush lips around it and sucks.

Heat spikes up your spine and you nod, “Yes, like that,” 

The sound of a belt buckle draws your eyes back up to Seonghwa and you watch him disrobe entirely, dropping his trousers and kicking off his boxers. 

“Let’s just take it slow,” Seonghwa eases your legs open, and you tilt your hips back to shift yourself into position and give him the access he needs, “sound good?” 

Despite the way you’re starting to ache, you nod and relax back into the sheets, cupping San to your chest as he lavishes your nipple. 

“Pretty,” Seonghwa hums as he slides his hands up the back of your thighs and deepens your position. 

It’s exposing and raw, but at the same time you know exactly how much this is lighting up the deep part of your brain that needs this, so you just let yourself go. 

“Nice and wet,” He smiles, this time dragging two fingers down your slit, rocking the slick pad of his middle finger over your swollen bundle of nerves. 

You gasp a little, shaking in his grip. 

“Isn’t she pretty, Sannie?” He says, glancing at the other alpha. 

“Mhm,” San sighs, lifting up with a little pop so he can take you both in. He relaxes back against Wooyoung and when you twist your head to the side you see the hungry darkness in San’s gaze. Wooyoung’s eyes flick over you, a subtle smile on his lips, and then he tucks himself close behind San and starts to work a hand into the alpha’s sweats. 

You hiss sharply when you feel something heavier drop over your slit and you jerk back to Seonghwa, his hard cock now nestled between your folds as he teases your clit lazily with the head. 

“You want alpha’s cock, pretty girl?” Seonghwa says, rocking his hips to drag his length over your seam. 

“Please,” You nod, fingers tight in the sheets. 

“Where?” He teases. 

“Hwa,” 

“Here?” He presses the tip of his cock against your slick hole and then stops completely. 

“Yes, yes,” You shiver, “please,” 

He slides away with a smirk. 

“Where?” He asks again, and you realize he wants to hear you say it. 

Wooyoung chuckles softly next to you, and you hear San sigh, the distinct slow sound of swishing fabric as Wooyoung works his hand over San’s cock. It feels a little thrilling to have an audience, it’s making your hazy brain even needier and wanton and you jerk your hips against Seonghwa’s cock to try and get him to move the right way. 

Seonghwa shakes his head, “Where?” 

Your back aches, a cramp in your core, and you huff, a little flustered, “Inside,” 

“Inside where?” Seonghwa tuts.

You swallow hard, reaching down between your legs. With gentle fingers you run your fingers along his shaft, watching his face for every little reaction. His jaw jumps as you swirl your fingers over the velvet head of his cock and you repeat the motion, again and again to get a harder reaction from him. 

You’re watching each other intently, waiting to see who will fall apart first. When he sighs once, soft and breathy, you angle your hips back just a little and push down on his cock, directing him inside your aching channel and sinking him an inch or two inside you. 

“Ah, ah,” He scolds, catching your wrist and locking you both still, “just say where you want me, omega,” 

“Inside,” You insist, voice breaking a little as a flush lights up your chest, “alpha, please,” 

“Just tell me,” He pleads, dropping his thumb over your clit, “it’s easy, darling, it’s just words,” 

You wet your lips and reach up for him, fingertips skimming over his arm, “Hwa,” you murmur, blush lighting up your cheeks, “I want you inside me, please, in my pussy,” 

He smiles and then rocks forward, pushing inside you to the hilt in one fluid motion, “Good omega,” 

The sensation of him filling you so fast and so suddenly has your body arching up against the sheets and your head falling back, your eyes shutting tightly as you moan, “Oh, fuck,” 

“Damn,” Wooyoung murmurs, but you ignore him. 

“Does that feel good, omega?” Seonghwa leans down over you, holding you tightly with a hand anchored to the back of your thigh just below the knee, holding you open wide for him. 

You whine tightly as he rocks inside you, the curled angle driving the head of his cock over your sweet spot again and again, the firm plane of his pubic bone pressing rhythmically against your clit. You feel dizzy from the sensation, but then you feel something low and needy in your gut. 

“Knot,” You stammer out, gripping down on any part of Seonghwa you can hold. 

“Is that what you want?” He smiles, rolling his hips. 

“Alpha, please,” You pant, “knot me,” 

He thrusts forward hard, holding himself tightly inside you and he shakes his head, “Ask nicely,” 

A shudder runs up your spine and you think it’s entirely possible that Wooyoung isn’t really that much of a brat, Seonghwa just likes it when the omegas under him whine. You rock your hips and beg him to keep moving inside you with your body, but he shakes his head again. He wants to hear you. 

“Alpha,” You pant, dropping your voice a bit and tapping into that deep coursing need running through you, “please knot me, please,” 

“Good girl,” He sighs, moving his hips again.

“Please,” Your head lolls back as he starts to thrust again in earnest. 

“I’ll keep you on my knot all night,” He chokes, finally starting to lose himself a little, the base of his cock starting to swell. 

“Yes, yes,” 

“Beg,” He thrusts hard, knocking your hips together, “beg me to fucking knot you,” 

Your mind tunnels, nothing but you and Seonghwa working together now and when you answer him it feels almost like another person, “Alpha, please, please, I’m so empty,” 

“Fuck,” He pants. 

“Please, fill me up,” You moan, nails digging into his arms.

“Mine,” He drops lower over you, pulling your head back by your hair and attaching his lips to your throat, “isn’t that right, pretty thing?” 

“Oh,” Your body is locking up around his cock suddenly as the dam breaks, “oh, fuck Hwa, don’t stop,” 

He shakes his head against you and keeps thrusting, panting into your hair. With a groan he shudders, locking his hips forwards and you feel the swell of his knot push past your entrance and expand. “Fuck, that’s it,” He grinds his hips against yours, and then you feel him release hot and wet and filling inside you. Pleasure washes back over you and you jut your hips against his just to feel another sweeping wave, your body disconnecting deliciously as he comes inside you. 

Your brain reconnects slowly. First you register the weight of him above you, pressing down into you with his cock still buried inside your heat. Then his soft fingers in your hair, his lips on your cheek. 

His knot is already softening and you sigh, reaching up for him and running your fingers through his black hair as you catch your breath and reopen your eyes. 

“Hey,” He murmurs down at you, “okay?” 

“Mhm,” You smile lazily, “you?” 

“Excellent,” He laughs, dropping one more kiss to your cheek. 

“I’ll say,” Wooyoung clears his throat and you blush scarlet, you had forgotten how close they were, how present they were. 

You cover your face with your hands and groan.

“You’re fun when you let loose,” Wooyoung prods your shoulder to get your attention, “I never would have pegged you for so much dirty talk,” 

“Oh my god,” You sigh, twisting to look at him, “will you please shut up?” 

“I’m just saying,” He shrugs and you’re trying to come up with a clever retort but then you feel Seonghwa start to pull himself free and you realize a few things at once. 

Where Wooyoung is looking at you and Seonghwa together, San hasn’t glanced at you once. His eyes are glued to Seonghwa, running over his sweat-slick body, his lips parted and his muscles locked up tight. He’s not in a rut, you know that clearly, but his expression and his eyes remind you of a rut, singularly focused and serious. 

Seonghwa notices it a moment later as he slides off the bed and you watch him smile, “Like something you see Sannie?” 

Wooyoung rolls his eyes and scoots a little closer to you on the bed and then San moves, quick like a flash. He secures a hand around Seonghwa’s wrist and tugs him down fast to land on top of him and then he kisses the other alpha so hard they both make a surprised hiss of pleasure. 

“San, what,” Seonghwa manages, but San won’t let him be. His lips are hungry, his body hungrier still, dragging the man closer and closer and slotting their hips together as their mouths work together. 

San breaks the kiss first, rolling to the side and effectively trapping Seonghwa beneath him, “I need you right now,” 

“Oh,” Seonghwa shudders, his cock starting to stiffen again. 

Wooyoung moves closer to you, giving them some much needed space and giving you the post-coital cuddles you really need. He tugs a blanket up over your bodies and spoons you, settling in like you’re about to watch a show together.

“Don’t mind them,” Wooyoung murmurs into your ear, “they get like this,” 

You open your mouth but Seonghwa moans sharply as San kisses down his neck, letting his tongue drag over the other alpha’s gland and nipping his collarbone. 

“Turn over,” San says, manhandling Seonghwa into a better position before pushing down his own pants just enough to free his cock. 

They’re nothing but need, clawing at each other just to feel skin against skin and it’s clear that they’ve done this a thousand times before, so intimately familiar with each other’s bodies. You can hear their breath, their every move against the sheets, and it feels like you’ve been given a view into something too intimate, too real. 

“Woo,” You murmur quietly, “should we…” 

He hesitates, almost unable to tear his eyes away but then he nods, “Shower?” 

“Mhm,” 

Wooyoung slips out of bed behind you as San drags Seonghwa’s head to the side and reaches into Wooyoung’s nightstand for the lube. 

“San,” Seonghwa whines in a tone you’ve never in your life heard from the alpha, “please, fucking please,” 

“Shh,” San brushes a hand down his lover’s back and then uncaps the lubricant in his hands, “I’ve got you jagiya,” 

Your lips part in awe as you watch them, stunned at the way they look together, move together. You only snap out of it when Wooyoung taps your side, and you slide quietly out of the bed too, focused on not disturbing the couple beside you. You follow Wooyoung to the connected bathroom, but you keep watching them all the while. 

Seonghwa groans when San thrusts his hips forward hard, pushing himself inside and you shiver at the image, your own body responding at the sight. San runs a hand through his hair before squeezing Seonghwa’s hips, silently letting him know that he’s about to move. As he does, rocking his hips in slow steady thrusts, he runs his hand reverently along Seonghwa’s skin, finding his hand in the sheets and twining their fingers together. 

“I missed you so much,” San says lowly, pressing a kiss between Seonghwa’s shoulders. 

Seonghwa makes another noise, almost a sob as he nods into the bedding, gripping down on the alpha’s hand harder. 

Even with the knotting you just experienced, the sight of them together is enough to light a flushing warmth back through your body and make you want again. 

“y/n,” Wooyoung finally catches your attention and you pull yourself away from the doorway and into the bathroom. 

In the shower, you and Wooyoung stick close together, and the sounds from the other room still make it through the door despite the drone of the water. You gravitate towards each other easily, wanting to feel the comfort of each other’s bodies in the warmth of the spray. You kiss until your jaw aches, and make each other come one more time despite the water turning tepid halfway through. 

When you’re done and the water is off, you wrap yourselves in fluffy blue towels and listen closely to see if San and Seonghwa are finished. 

As you lean against the sink, Wooyoung gently drags a brush through your wet hair to detangle it from the shower and you finally ask the question that’s been brewing in the back of your mind, “Woo,” you murmur, keeping your voice low to ensure the alphas in the adjacent room can’t hear you, “why aren’t they together?” 

Relationships between the same designation are rare but certainly not unheard of, especially in polyamorous relationships, and it’s plain as day to you now how much they connect and care about one another.

Wooyoung meets your eyes in the mirror and shrugs, his mouth downturned, “You’d have to ask them,” 

“You don’t know?” Your eyebrows shoot high. 

He shakes his head, “I learned not to push that one a long time ago,” 

You chew the inside of your lip, mulling it over. Your conversation with San all those weeks ago when he walked you home flicks through your mind and you remember the way that he brushed right past the topic the minute you started to press. You had assumed the person he was referring to was Wooyoung, they’re always so tactile with one another, but the longer you spend with them behind closed doors the more you realize that is just how Wooyoung communicates, with touch. Now the little moments of tension you spotted between San and Seonghwa make so much more sense. 

Wooyoung finishes brushing out your hair and puts the brush back on the sink, “What’s that face for?” 

You smooth out your expression and recover, “Sorry,” 

“What?” He prompts you. 

“What about you?” You ask softly. 

“I love them, they’re my best friends,” He says with ease. 

“Okay,” You hold his gaze in the mirror. 

He wraps his arms around you and shakes his head, “It works for us,” He says, “and if they’re not ready to admit how they feel to themselves, then that’s up to them and they can have whatever this is,” 

“As long as you’re not caught in the middle,” You press a kiss to his forearm. 

“Not with them,” He assures you. 

The sound of laughter from the next room draws your attention and Wooyoung smiles, “Let’s go, don’t worry about this,” he says and you nod, staying bundled up in your towel as you follow him into the next room. 

San and Seonghwa are cuddled tightly together, trading soft and quiet kisses, but when they hear you both coming back in you watch San straighten up a little and look towards the two of you. They look so good together, so natural, relaxing against each other in the sheets looking far more at peace than you’ve ever seen them. 

“Sorry about that,” He clears his throat softly. 

“Don’t be sorry,” You shake your head. 

“We’re supposed to be taking care of you,” He smiles, “I just got a little carried away,”

Seonghwa blushes, dipping his face into the pillow below him and you grin, “I’m actually doing fine, don’t worry about me.” 

“Can we come back in?” Wooyoung asks as he climbs onto the bed, reaching back for your hand. 

“Of course,” Seonghwa pushes San back towards the other edge of the bed and he lifts the duvet, “it’s your nest not ours, please,” 

Something inside you feels a little soft, like warm melted butter at the idea of a full nest and you feel your tense shoulders relax. Wooyoung maneuvers you into the center, snuggled up between him and Seonghwa, but San reaches across and soon you’re sinking into all three of their touches. 

“You want to try and sleep?” San asks softly. 

“We probably should,” You nod. 

Seonghwa finds the tender gland in your neck and strokes it gently, “We’ll be right here when you wake up,” 

You shift closer, resting your cheek on his chest and you nod, “I know you will,”

“Good,” He sighs, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. 

Held like this it’s easy to drift off so you do. 

When you wake again it’s to the sounds of rustling sheets, but not someone getting up and out of bed, it’s the clear sound of rocking. Whoever it is sounds close, pleasured little pants and moans, and you can feel your stomach knotting up and just the sounds of sex in the room so close to you. 

There’s a warm body behind you, just coconing you in, but it’s different than how you fell asleep. The body behind you is broader, warmer, and you realize after a moment of hazy waking that it’s San cuddled up to your back and spooning you, not Wooyoung. You slept hard though, and you’re not really surprised that everyone shifting around didn’t wake you even though the bed isn’t really large enough for the four of you. You’re all making it work and you’d be lying if you said the close proximity of them and their scents wasn’t keeping you calmer than any heat you’ve had before. 

Your face is tucked into a pillow, and you don’t exactly want to alert the room that you’re awake, but you’re starting to feel uncomfortably hot again and you can feel yourself itching out of your skin, desperate to just slip a hand between your thighs and relieve the growing tension. 

Someone, Wooyoung you gather, moans quietly next to you. 

“So needy,” Seonghwa whispers, “and you’re not even in heat,” 

Wooyoung makes another shuddering noise, and the bed moves next to you a little faster. 

You feel it when San’s hand on your hip tightens, his breath warm behind you, and then there’s the telltale sensation of his cock growing hard against your backside. Your eyes flutter open, your hands gripping the bedding beneath you. 

San swallows tightly and drops his lips to your ear, “You awake?” 

You nod, lifting your head a little. 

Seonghwa and Wooyoung are tangled together inches from you, and the groan that leaves you at the sight of them is sudden and sharp, a cramp lighting up inside you. 

Seonghwa’s head snaps to the side at the sound and his brows knit together, “Omega?” 

Your muscles clench, slick rushing forth, “Oh, god,” 

Wooyoung whines, his fingers digging into Seonghwa’s shoulders, “Stay with me, Hwa,” 

“I’m sorry, baby,” Seonghwa shifts to tend to the omega in his lap, “I’m right here,” 

“y/n?” San’s lips press closer to your ear, “let me help,” 

You relax into his chest immediately, your legs parting, body practically purring the moment his hand smooths over your hip to press between your legs. 

“We have an audience, baby,” Seonghwa murmurs, pulling Wooyoung down to his mouth and kissing him soundly. 

Wooyoung moans, desperate and shaky, his hips starting to move again beneath the comforter as he and Seonghwa rock against each other. 

“You do like that, don’t you,” Seonghwa teases him, his fingers tracing a line up Wooyoung’s chest and circling his pebbled nipple. 

“Jesus,” Wooyoung stammers, “fuck,” 

You can’t tear your eyes away, you’re glued to them and the way their bodies move together, but you gasp sharply as San brushes his fingertips gently over your clit and starts to explore you.

  “More,” You beg softly, “please, Sannie,”

If it's at all possible, his cock gets stiffer against your backside. 

“Is my pretty boy going to come?” Seonghwa hums at Wooyoung, nipping at his lip and placing wet kisses across his jaw. 

“I need it,” He chokes out in reply. 

San pushes a finger inside you, but with the way you’re dripping and aching for a knot it’s nowhere near enough and you shake your head, “Alpha, please,” 

“Shh, shh,” He soothes, pulling back his hand entirely, “hold on, jagi,” 

He rifles around behind you, and you hear the sound of a drawer opening and closing. He’s fiddling with something behind you but you can’t turn around, you just need to let him take care of things. Your body is too flushed with warmth and slick with sweat to comprehend anything but the deep need inside you to feel what Wooyoung is feeling, and every second that you watch them makes your need hungrier. 

“Here we go,” San wraps an arm around you, and you see a flash of something pink and blue in his hands but you don’t make sense of it until he hikes up your leg to open you up wide and you feel something hard push at the entrance of your cunt. 

“What,” You start to say but then he angles the toy upwards and sinks the first few inches of the thick dildo inside you. 

“Just relax,” He eases you, “watch them,”

A moment ago you would have said you needed a real cock, that no knotting dildo would do, but with the way San is wrapped around you it doesn’t seem to matter. The heat from his body sinks into yours, blooming jasmine everywhere as his breath passes over you, staccatoed pants with every sharp flex of his arm to fuck you deeper. 

In front of you, Seonghwa and Wooyoung have gotten closer, their faces tucked close to one another as Wooyoung chokes out another moan. You watch the red blush creep up his chest, his back, his cheeks, flushing him deliciously as his body starts to tremble in earnest. 

“Come, baby,” Seonghwa kisses his ear, “don’t stop,” 

Wooyoung groans, muttering something into Seonghwa’s collarbone and he smiles in response, petting Wooyoung’s hair and dropping his lips to Wooyoung’s aching throat. Your body locks up, the sight too much for your heat-addled brain. 

“Deeper,” You plead, “harder,” 

San nods against your shoulder, “Good, omega,”

A throbbing pulses through your body, and he pushes the dildo in deeper, the knot at the base catching on your slick hole as he works the toy faster and harder. You look down between your legs, at the way his muscular arm arcs over your belly and at how fast his hand works the silicone cock inside you, and all you can do is moan and grip down on the bedding once more. 

“I’m, I’m,” Wooyoung pants and you look back up, “fuck, I’m coming,” 

Seonghwa sucks at Wooyoung’s pulse, teasing his mating gland and scenting him and you watch Wooyoung’s eyes roll back, his body locking up in absolute pleasure as his orgasm collides into him. He ruts himself against Seonghwa blindly, aching and whimpering until his hips slow and he slips down against the alpha to rest on his chest. 

“Baby,” Seonghwa strokes his lover’s back, “you’re so good,” 

The praise, even when not directed at you, sends a spark of needy pleasure through your body and you grip down on San’s arm, “Please,” 

He shifts you both suddenly, wrapping you tightly in his arms and rolling you so that you’re laid out on top of him, your back to his chest and your body folding open and prone like a fresh flower. Once you’re settled there he returns to working the toy in and out of your fluttering walls, but this time he takes his opposite hand and finds your clit, setting a quick rhythm against your bud to stimulate you fast. 

“G-God, oh god,” You grip down on the sheets, letting him control you. 

“Good omegas come,” San all but growls in your ear, “are you good, jagi?”

“Yes, yes, yes,” Your brain is fogging up, things feeling hot and cold at the same time, “knot me,” 

“Come,” 

“Knot, please, alpha,” You manage, and even though you feel the pressure dropping low in your belly, the only thing that will get you over the edge of pleasure is his knot. 

“You want to be filled?” He pumps the toy sharply. 

“Yes!” You clamp your eyes down tight, holding on. 

His fingers slip off your clit, hand reaching for something in the bedding and you start to whine but then he does it. With one full thrust the knot of the toy pushes up inside you and activates the primal part of your brain that had been lying so dormant. You’re flustered and coming hard so suddenly, but he continues to rock and grind the toy to catch against your clit and leave your body fluttering over into orgasm. 

“Yes, oh, oh, fuck,” You babble, and then you feel something more. The sensation of a cock spilling inside you is so distinctive, so real, and you blink your eyes open with a gasp as the sensation heightens your orgasm into another rolling wave. 

When it all slows down, you can barely breathe.

San leaves the toy inside you, one hand on your hip and the other slowly stroking your belly. 

“y/n,” Seonghwa’s voice is warm and close, fingertips coasting along your cheek, “are you alright?” 

“I’m so good,” You sigh, an overwhelming urge to snuggle into a cuddle pile and never leave it, “I’m perfect,” 

“Not too rough?” San checks as he starts to push himself up a little. 

You shake your head against his chest, your hands finally unlocking from the sheets. 

“Alright,” He reaches between your legs and gently takes the toy, “relax, let me help with this,” 

Knotting dildos, while an incredible substitute during heat, lack one feature most of the time. Where a real alpha’s knot would deflate and easily allow you to uncouple, knotting dildos like this one are just solid silicone. You let him ease the toy out of your channel, going slow and keeping you calm with his warm scent. When it pops free you fall back with a sigh, ignoring the sudden rush of artificial cum out of you. 

“I’ll get a towel,” Wooyoung murmurs, and when you look up you realize he’s already standing and redressed in boxers and an oversized dark gray shirt. 

“Water too,” San instructs and Wooyoung diverts to the mini fridge. 

San eases you off his chest and to the side, and Seonghwa pulls away the sheets that had been under you, now damp and soiled with slick and cum. When he flops back to lie down you notice he’s closer, moving into San’s side and their bodies rest against each other from hip to shoulder, slotting together like a puzzle. 

“Let me in,” Wooyoung says as he climbs back into the bed, a warm washcloth swept between your thighs and a water bottle in your hand. 

Wooyoung’s phone lights up with a chime, an alarm, but he silences without a thought. 

“Woo,” Seonghwa stops him, “get your meds before you forget,” 

You blink hard and lift your head, “Your suppressants?”

“Mm,” Wooyoung nods, quickly moving towards his bag by the door, “I wasn’t even paying attention,” 

“What time is it?” You twist in the sheets. 

“You need yours?” Wooyoung asks, “Where are they?” 

“What day is it?” You start doing mental math and in much the same way you need to take birth control pills like clockwork, you need to stay on schedule with suppressants. 

“Saturday,” San runs a hand along your back to soothe you, “you’re alright,” 

“Where, babe?” Wooyoung asks again, pulling your bag from the floor. 

“There’s a pink pouch in the side,” You tell him, “they should be in there,” 

“Got it,” 

“Did you miss one?” Seonghwa eases you back into the bedding, “Or two?” 

“One,” You answer immediately, your schedule built into you even in heat, “I’m good,” 

“Good,” Seonghwa rubs your back, “don’t worry,” 

“Here,” Wooyoung presses your pill pack into your hand. 

He takes his own pill and then slides back into bed while you pop two out of their little foil packet, Friday and Saturday together, and then down them both with the remaining water in the bottle. Relief fills you immediately, the last thing you want to deal with during onboarding would be a broken and extended cycle. 

“Thank you for the reminder,” You sigh, “I don’t know where my head is,” 

“Heat,” Seonghwa laughs. 

“Mm,” You nod, “this one has been so easy though, honestly,” 

“That’s good,” San finds your hand and gives you a squeeze, “but don’t be hard on yourself,” 

“Exactly,” Seonghwa nods, “I should have asked your schedule,” 

“It’s fine,” You shake your head, “we’re good, crisis averted,” 

Wooyoung laughs and snuggles up to your back, “God, could you imagine if we both forgot,” 

“Absolutely not,” San groans. 

“Both of you in heat?” Seonghwa shakes his head, “I don’t know if we could handle that one,” 

“Ha ha,” Wooyoung grumbles, “I’m not that bad,” 

“I don’t know,” You relax into their touch, letting your eyes drift closed again, “I think I believe them,” 

He huffs into your shoulder, and San and Seonghwa both laugh again, shuffling lower in the bedding until all four of you are sandwiched together. Your body feels stiff, little cramps here and there, but for right now you can just relax and feel them close to you, their combined scents easing you into a warm mid-morning nap. 

You spend the whole weekend tangled up with the three of them in every possible way, falling in and out of the peaks and valleys of your heat right alongside them. It’s easier this time around, never feeling faded or too foggy even on your hardest days, everything you need just taken care of without question. It’s surely the suppressants, but it’s them too, everything feeling so natural and easy and comfortable. You hardly have room to think of anything but yourself and the men with you until your heat breaks entirely. 

You don’t think of them once until it’s over, and then you do. 

This time it’s immediate, a fast sinking feeling while you’re awake that’s like being doused in ice cold water when drinking, an instantly sobering effect that leaves you blinking hard and slightly dizzy. San and Seonghwa aren’t with you, they’re in the kitchen making lunch while you and Wooyoung relaxed together in a bit of a post orgasmic haze, but all of a sudden you wish they were here. 

“Shit,” You breathe, pushing yourself into a sitting position and dragging the robe tighter around you. 

“You good?” Wooyoung asks from his position to your side. 

“Yeah,” You nod, “but it’s done,” 

“That was fast,” He murmurs, stroking your hair back, “I would have thought one more day,” 

“Me too,” You breathe, running your hands over your face and trying to get your head around things. It’s both helpful that it’s Sunday so you can go back to work tomorrow, but too sudden, this heat a full two days shorter than the previous.

“What can I get you?” He rolls over onto one hip and looks up at you. 

“Can you just hand me my phone,” You nod past him to where it sits on the charger, flipped over and silenced, “my roommates are probably looking for me,”

“Yeah,” He grabs it and then grabs the water bottle on the nightstand too, “here, this too,” 

“Thank you,” You take both, and then drink as much water as you can manage to soothe your dry throat. 

Wooyoung slides up to sit next to you and rests a warm hand on your knee, but he stays quiet and lets you come back to center. 

After three days of being with them you almost fully forgot how you left it at the studio, how you left it with them. When you light up your phone and actually take a look at your notifications your stomach knots up immediately. There’s fluff of course, random notifications from Instagram and Twitter, a few texts from friends and you can see that your roommates group chat is actively pinging with messages, but then you scroll a little further to texts from a few nights ago and feel your pulse quicken. 

You hesitate a little, not sure if you really want to know what the unread text from Mingi says, but then you click it and lose your breath all over again. 

He’s freaking out a little bit, but I told him you’re probably already home and sleeping. 

Which you are, right? 

You swallow tightly, and then read the third one, sent fifteen minutes after the first two. 

I just really hope you’re safe.

Now your chest hurts. 

“What is it?” Wooyoung glances at you, but you know he knows. 

It was real, you know it now. Deep in your core you know that every moment spent with them wasn’t just your heat, and it wasn’t just your hormones. The longing you felt after and your willingness to let them have every inch of you wasn’t just nothing. 

You hand him the phone silently, you just can’t manage to say it out loud. 

He reads the text and sees your expression, and all it once it dawns on him too. Wooyoung tucks your hair behind your ear and smooths his thumb along your jaw, “So this heat was different wasn’t it?” 

Your eyes fill with tears fast, and you wet your lips, “Yeah,” 

“Oh, babe,” His eyes soften. 

“Woo,” You swallow hard to push the tears away, “I didn’t know, I swear I didn’t,” 

“Fuck,” He gathers you close, leaning back into the cushions and tucking your face into his chest, “come here, don’t cry,” 

You hear the door creak open and you press your eyes closed tight. 

“What’s going on in here?” San asks, his voice low and soothing, “What’s wrong?” 

Wooyoung rubs your back and sighs, “Life sucks,” 

You laugh sharply into Wooyoung’s chest at his tone and nod your head, “Fucking sucks,” 

“Oh, y/n,” Seonghwa murmurs, “are you coming down already, I’m so sorry we stepped out,” 

Your brain throbs, the memory of Mingi holding you steady as you cried last time flickering so brightly you can almost feel the echo of his arms around you and you bury your head deeper into Wooyoung’s chest as if that will be a place for you to hide away from all of this. 

“Get in here,” Wooyoung says at that, “she’s shivering,” 

Someone warm sidles up to your back, and at the warm scent of freshly brewed coffee you know it’s Seonghwa. He cuddles you both close and presses kisses along your shoulder, “What’s wrong, jagiya? Talk to us,” 

You search through your feelings, through all the things you could say or not say and all you can do is sigh, heavy and hard against Wooyoung’s warm skin. You push yourself back, rolling onto your back between them and you realize San is sitting on the edge of the bed by Seonghwa, reaching over his lover to rest his hand on your thigh. 

You find Wooyoung’s hand in the tangled mess and lace your fingers together, “You’ve all been so wonderful to me the past couple of days,” 

“That’s why you’re so upset?” Seonghwa smooths his hand over your forehead. 

“I don’t want to go back to normal,” You confess, “I don’t want to go back to work,” 

Wooyoung’s brows knit together, fully empathizing with the part that’s hurting so badly. In the clarity of your come down it’s readily apparent to you how different this has been from your time with Yunho and Mingi. This time was casual, this time was easy. The comfort of these two alphas was essential and soothing, but you don’t want them, not like you wanted before. You had been so sure the ache in your body that yearned so deeply was something so easily written off, a biological want, but knowing better now hurts. 

“Why, jagi?” San strokes your skin lovingly. 

“I’ve been so stupid,” You pull your hand from Wooyoung’s and sweep both through your hair, wiping under your eyes as you get control of yourself, “Woo was right all along,” 

You know he’d normally make a joke, but he just nods, “I’m sorry,” 

“Is this about them?” Seonghwa asks softly. 

You manage a nod, “How am I supposed to go back to the studio?” 

“Stop,” San shakes his head firmly, “it’s your studio too.” 

“Is it though?” 

“Yes,” He squeezes you, “I know this hurts, but you said it yourself, they wanted it to be a one-time thing,” 

Misery curls in your gut at that thought, that your time with them really is over, but you nod, “They’ve been pretty clear, they just want to be friends.” 

“And you?” San prompts you again, and Seonghwa looks up to him. 

“I’ve been moving on from them since it happened,” You murmur, “I guess I just didn’t know before now if it was real or just… being an omega.” 

“At least you know now,” Wooyoung offers quietly, “and I know this doesn’t help, help, but next time when it feels real, you’ll know it is, you can trust it.” 

You don’t really want a next time with someone else, some faceless fated alpha, but you nod anyway. 

Seonghwa leans into you, pressing a kiss to your forehead, “I know it’s hard loving someone, or caring for someone like this when they don’t feel the same,” he says quietly, “but believe me when I say you’re worth a thousand of them, and this heartache will fade,” 

The room is still around you, quiet, and your breath hitches as you hang on his words and how true you know they are. Wooyoung reaches across you to brush his hand down Seonghwa’s arm, and you feel the weight of the bed change. When you open your eyes, San is gone. 

“Sannie?” You murmur. 

Seonghwa shakes his head against yours, “He’s fine,” he murmurs, “this isn’t about him,” 

“It’s complicated,” You surmise, turning to find Seonghwa’s brown eyes. 

“Isn’t it always?” He smiles, angles into a joke, and the moment of vulnerability is gone. 

You let him hold you quietly in the middle of the bed for a moment before you manage, “What now?” 

“Now we get up,” Wooyoung squeezes your hand, “we get cleaned up, and we get an absolutely delicious fucking dinner,” 

Despite the tears lingering in your eyes his words pull a laugh straight from your chest and you nod, “That sounds… so good right about now,” 

“Mhm,” Wooyoung nods, “you can’t let this pull you under again,” 

“I know,” You breathe. 

“Tomorrow will be fine,” He doubles down, “awkward, but you’ve done that with them before. You’ll be just fine,” 

“Okay,”

“You two can use the shower first if you want,” Wooyoung kisses your shoulder. 

“Should we order in?” Seonghwa asks, still resting by your side. 

“No,” Wooyoung insists, “we’re going out, and we’re getting our minds off things.” He’s off the bed a second later and he follows San out of the room, no room for argument now that he’s set his mind to cheering you back up. 

Seonghwa’s quiet, but then he drops his lips to your gland and presses gentle kisses there to help soothe you before he asks, “Are you up to going out? I can pull the alpha card if you need to me to calm Youngie down,” 

If you’re being really truly honest, you want nothing more than to curl up in bed, but you know if you do that you’ll just spend the next ten hours worrying about tomorrow’s inevitable encounter. You chew your lip and fight the urge to take his offer, “It might be good for me to get out,” you settle on. 

“Then we’re going,” He nods. 

Seonghwa rolls off the bed, but you can feel the question lingering on your tongue and you reach out and take his hand, “Hwa,”

“What is it?” He smiles softly down at you. 

You smooth your thumb along the back of his hand, “You and San,” 

His smile fades and his eyes flick away from yours for just a moment, “I’ll tell you another time,” 

“You don’t have to,” You rush to correct, “but you’ve been here for me, and I just wanted you to know that I’m here for you too,” 

“I’m fine, y/n, honestly,” He retracts his hand but you tighten your grip. 

“I’m sure you are,” You hold his gaze, “but I’m still here,” 

He swallows tightly and then nods, “I’ll start the shower for you,” 

You leave it here, you have to. With San so close in the next room and the way Seonghwa left you in bed you can practically feel his boundary line between you and you have to respect it. Maybe he’ll tell you someday and maybe he won’t, but it’s clear to you that there’s something swirling and deep between these two alphas and their omega. Even in the easiest relationships, things are hard. 

With the room empty you take a moment and you turn your phone over in your hands. You need to put them out of sight and out of mind if you’re going to make it through the night at your own apartment without fixating on them and how you feel. But for just a moment you just can’t help yourself. 

With a sigh you open up your messages again and read through Mingi’s texts and then Yunho’s. Your fingers hover over the keys and you wonder what message you could write back at this point that wouldn’t feel terrible to them or to you, or what doors it might open, but you don’t. 

Seonghwa calls out to let you know the shower is warm and you pull yourself out of bed, leaving your phone once again face down on the dresser. It will just be what it will be, and nothing you do today will change that. You follow Seonghwa into the shower, and then you both follow Wooyoung and San out for the night. 

It all feels normal almost immediately, like any other night out that you’ve had with them before. You don’t feel any longing, any desperate ache. You don’t want to cling to Seonghwa or San at all, despite how good the weekend might have been. Suppressants or not, you feel normal. Clear. 

The remaining tension with San is gone too, with practiced ease he’s back to his normal self. You know it clearly, he’s done this exact dance before. He laughs alongside Seonghwa like best friends do, with a perfectly acceptable amount of space between them. No heated glances, no touches under the table. 

You think maybe all you have to do is learn how to dance like San.

[kim-jongin-s]

svt fic recs (mostly nc-17; jeongcheol, verkwan, minwon + other)

JEONGCHEOL

"fuckme.mp3 (a smash hit)". au, underground rapper!sc. oneshot, 2k. nc-17.

It's all thanks to Hansol, really.

"calibration". omegaverse: alpha!sc, omega!jh. oneshot, 2k. nc-17.

“…can tell he really wants you,” Hansol is saying, somewhere nearby, except for a minute it doesn’t smell like Hansol, and Seungcheol blinks, confused, until he sees who’s following Hansol into the room and stops caring about anything else.

"a thousand degrees tonight". oneshot, 3.6k. nc-17.

The novelty has yet to wear off, knowing that he can have someone as strong and sure and dependable as Seungcheol like this- unfocused, needy. Desperate for him.

"babysitting gone wrong". au, babysitter!jh. oneshot, 4k. nc-17.

In which, Jeonghan gets hired to babysit the youngest Choi for the night but ends up sitting on the meaty thick thighs of the eldest Choi sibling.

"amour". au, vampire!sc. oneshot, 7.7k. nc-17. (check out the prequels to fully enjoy this one.)

At some point, Seungcheol had found himself with a collection of all the small, intimate noises that Jeonghan had made for him tucked away in a secret part of his heart.

"praying at your altar". modern royalty!au: bodyguard!sc, prince!jh. oneshot, 8.6k. nc-17.

Above all, the prince is precious.

"stay here with me". au, psychologist!sc. 5 chapters, 31k. r. ♡♡

Eight months after his younger sister's death, Jeonghan is struggling. Barely hanging on. He's tired. Lonely. Wishing he could find one therapist that understands his niece. Then he makes an appointment with newly graduated child psychologist Choi Seungcheol.

VERKWAN

"one day we're gonna get". oneshot, 1.6k. nc-17.

“Come on! As if you don’t know I look at you!” Hansol’s eyes are wide, exasperated. His tone is teasing. His grip on Seungkwan’s arm is so tight.

He’s scared that Seungkwan doesn’t believe it, Seungkwan can tell.

"one pound of flesh". historical!au, omegaverse: omega!sk, alpha!vn. oneshot, 4.5k. nc-17.

A strange marriage, to an even stranger alpha.

"sinking/floating". omegaverse: omega!sk, omega!vn. twoshot, 12k. nc-17.

Hansol presents late. Seungkwan is right there to guide him through it.

"left where the daylight comes". regency!au, omegaverse: omega!sk, alpha!vn. twoshot, 50k. nc-17. ♡♡♡♡♡

“Our dear Seungkwan is engaged to be mated to Alpha Park by the end of the summer season!” Seungkwan’s mother says, cheerily.

The delicate porcelain cup shatters under the force of Hansol’s hand.

"easily (like do re mi)". au, teacher!sk, single parent!vn. 5 chapters, 53k. pg-13.

As a single father, Hansol tends to worry too much.

Then, comes Boo Seungkwan, a kindergarten teacher that occupies Hansol’s mind more than he knows what to do with.

MINWON

"don't mention it". omegaverse: alpha!ww, alpha!mg. oneshot, 2k. nc-17. ♡

Mingyu's preferred person to spend his rut with may not be the most evident choice.

"the trials and tribulations of being accidentally bonded". college!au, omegaverse: omega!ww, alpha!mg. oneshot, 41k. r.

Jeon Wonwoo was supposed to be a Beta. He was also supposed to hate a certain Kim Mingyu with all his might. But, then again, who says life couldn't roughly take you in the ass without preparation?

OTHER

"we". wonwoo/seokmin/mingyu. oneshot, 15k. nc-17.

“Hyung, would you ever want to have a threesome?”

"love so tender (you are my)". chanhan. omegaverse: beta!jh, omega!dn. twoshot, 16k. nc-17.

Jeonghan is good at being in the middle. Extreme emotions are not really his forte. So he is grateful to be born as a beta. Less drama, easier.

Then he meets Lee Chan.

"over and over again". seoksoon. soulmate!au. oneshot, 19k. r.

Soonyoung has the easiest time finding his soulmate - running into him in the hallway at age nine kind of speeds things along. Nothing after that, though, is anywhere near as simple.

[deckerstarblanche]

CSSNS 2024 Entry!!!!!

Hello, friends! After a year and some change, I’m finally back with the conclusion to “An Offer She Can’t Refuse.”

I hope you enjoy it!

Chapter 3

As soon as he cracked his eyes open the next morning, Killian knew she was gone. With a frustrated groan, he glared up at the stucco ceiling and flipped over onto his stomach, pressing his face into her pillow and feeling like a fool.

Really, he should have expected this from the beginning. Knowing Emma, her heat had probably finished sometime in the early hours that morning, she took a look at where she was, and who she was with, and bolted.

It’s not like she would go to me as a first choice, he thought to himself. And so Killian closed his eyes, allowing him to feel the hurt and the anguish and the pain, until he stuffed them back down into the part of his brain, where he’d stored all of his worst thoughts about himself for so many years.

And it did hurt, a lot. He knew, deep in his gut, that they were supposed to be together. Her shell of self-protection might be too tough to crack, though. For him, Emma Swan – her laugh, the intoxicating sweet scent that he would be able to pick out blindfolded – would always be his ideal. Now that he had had the chance to actually be with her physically, Killian felt like he’d been granted access to heaven for three glorious days. How could any other woman compare?

Pathetically, he hoped that one day they could still be friends.

When he finally set foot back inside the dorms, the clean, familiarly blank scent in the air confirmed that the filtration system was running smoothly. It was almost as if the past three days had been neutralized as well, leaving only a possibly ruined friendship in its wake.

“Jones? Where the hell have you been?” David asked, concerned etched on his face as Killian entered their room, aggressively tossing his backpack onto his bed.

He narrowed his eyes at David’s suspicious tone, hackles raised. The other man clearly knew something, probably from Emma herself.

“Did you not get the update from your girlfriend?” Killian sneered, unable to resist recklessly channeling all of his pain and anger toward his roommate. “After she got what she wanted, Emma chewed me up and spat me out! Well, I don’t want to talk about it, and I’ll know that you're lying if you tell me otherwise…”

David’s surprise quickly morphed into hostility, and he rose from his computer desk. “What exactly are you accusing me of? Are you gonna cry because a woman finally rejected you? That’s why you don’t fuck around with your friends!” he roared back, forcefully pushing Killian in the chest.

“She needed it– she begged for it, Dave. What kind of a self-respecting Alpha would I be if I said no? It doesn’t matter if it’s your best friend or a complete stranger, right? You’ve got some experience with that yourself, don’t you, eh?” he said crudely, shoving David back as soon as he regained his footing.

“What the hell does that mean? If you want me to kick your ass, say one more thing about Mary Margaret…” David replied in a growl, putting his fists up.

Killian laughed, ready to hit something, preferably David’s face. “Listen, I’m done with every Omega at this school, especially Emma Swan. I’m not the simpering asshole she seems to think I am, and she can come apologize to me if she wants to go back to being ‘just friends.’” he sneered, building a wall of his own ego around his fragile heart.

David put his fists down, hands angrily balled at his sides.

“Fuck you, Jones. If you don’t have enough sense to fight for Emma, then you don’t deserve her!” David thundered, hurling the door open and slamming it shut behind him so hard that the wood nearly cracked off the hinges.

———-

About an hour later, after he had cooled down from his argument with David, Killian heard a hesitant knock on the door. Hoping it was Emma, but unsure, he got up to open it. There she was, standing awkwardly in front of him, shoving her hands in and out of her pockets.

“Killian, I came by to apologize. My leaving wasn’t your fault. I was a coward, so I’ll understand if—” Emma began, but he cut her off, shaking his head.

“No, you don’t get to do that— slink off like everything has been said. I was hurt that you’d left without a trace, and I let that morph into anger. A man’s ego is a fragile thing, Swan…but I want to be a better person than that,” he told her, his blue eyes locked on hers with a penetrating gaze.

Taking a deep breath, he continued.

“Emma. The truth is, I care deeply for you. I have since the first day we met, so when you said that friendship was all you desired, I made my peace with that. But after what we shared last week, I knew that watching from the sidelines would never be enough.”

Killian looked away as soon as Emma did, color rushing to his cheeks. He readied himself for rejection: that speech, no matter how inauthentic it would sound about another woman, would definitely have anyone else melting in my arms, he thought to himself, barely suppressing a chuckle.

“What’s so funny?” he heard a small voice say, and he looked back at Emma, whose eyes were glittering with what looked like tears.

“Nothing, love. I’ve said my piece, and now I’ll give you your space. Hold on, why are you crying?” he asked her cautiously, furrowing his brow.

“I’m not crying, you idiot, I’m just emotional over what you said– there’s a difference!” Emma replied with a watery chuckle, raking her fingers through her hair.

Killian decided to throw caution to the wind.

“And what was it that I said? I want to know so that I can say it again,” he told her, summoning up his most rakish grin.

Emma rolled her eyes, but he knew from the way she blushed that things would be ok for them— maybe even better than ok. She hadn’t spurned him, and she hadn’t stormed out.

“Killian, I care about you too. I cared so much after our…um, time together last week that I freaked out. Big emotions are tough for me, you know that,” Emma admitted, stuffing her hands into her coat pockets.

“I do know that, Swan. I think that’s why we’ve worked so well as friends— we’re both godawful at expressing our feelings,” he began, drawing a few steps closer to her. Emma looked at him with wide eyes, like a deer in the headlights, but he wasn’t going to be put off by that anymore.

“Emma, I’m going to tell you something that I’ve never shared with anyone else before,” he murmured, close enough now that he could tuck a lock of hair behind her ear. She was so attuned to him that she gasped at the innocent contact, making him smile.

“Being with you was the most intimate I’ve ever been, with anybody. I don’t want to go back to the way things were before, and I don’t want anyone else in my bed but you.”

Terrifyingly, Emma was silent, her gaze dropping away from his and going to the floor. Killian felt like his heart was pounding loud enough for her to hear, and that humiliation was imminent.

“Emma, I’m—” he began, but she looked back up, a huge smile lighting up her face. She flung herself forward into his arms, pressing her lips to his, kissing him with what felt like years of pent-up emotion. Then, she pulled away, almost reluctantly.

“I don’t wanna talk. I mean, I know we have a lot to say to each other, but not right now. Just kiss me, ok?” she said breathlessly, tearing off her jacket. Killian barely had time to agree before she nearly jumped into his arms, the force of her excitement knocking them over onto his bed. Clothes were shed quickly, and soon enough he was hovering over her, admiring her golden hair as it spilled out over his pillow.

After one more searing kiss, he rose up, sitting back on his heels as he stroked his hands down her thighs. Emma shivered violently under his touch, as a rush of slick coated her inner thighs from the fairly innocent gesture.

“Oh Killian, please do that again,” Emma sighed, opening her knees wider. Surprised, he let his hands glide from the tops of her thighs all the way down to her knees, watching rapturously as she thrashed beneath him. Every attempt she made to raise her pelvis, to seek him out, was caught by Killian’s firm but gentle grip as he grounded her to the mattress.

“Do you think you could come just from this, love?” he asked, breathing harshly, as it was taking every ounce of his self control not to sheath himself inside her pulsing cunt.

“I…I’m not sure,” she admitted, opening her eyes as she reached up, grabbing the hair on the back of his head to smash her lips against his.

Emma’s kiss was electric and confident, and it made him thank whatever higher power existed in the universe that she’d given him another chance. When she finally tore her lips away, he felt dizzy with anticipation.

“Fuck me, Alpha,” she commanded, grabbing the nearest pillow and shoving it under her ass. Killian’s eyes lit up with amusement at her take-charge attitude, but he was soon distracted by a small warm hand shooting out to stroke his rock-hard length.

“As you wish, Emma, always,” he purred, and without another thought, he plunged in, savoring the feeling of being inside of her again.

They matched each other stroke for stroke, and as the room filled with the sounds of their frantic coupling, Killian realized that it was her first time fucking him with a clear head. She was choosing him, and not out of any desperation.

He was determined to make it last as long as possible, so after a few more thrusts, he rolled them so that Emma was on top, her long hair surrounding them like a curtain. She yelped in surprise, but quickly gained control, setting her own rhythm as she clutched at his chest.

“I seem to remember liking this view of you in particular,” he teased, reaching up to gather her hair with one hand while kissing up the long column of her neck.

“Is that so?” Emma asked breathlessly, moaning as he hit a spot deep inside of her, pinpointing it so he could press up into her as many times as he could. “Fuck, yes… keep going right there, please!”

From the way her inner muscles fluttered against him, he could tell that it wouldn’t be too much longer before she came, so he kept his pace brisk, giving her exactly what she needed. Moments later, Emma exploded, shouting his name as she clamped down like a vise, spasming multiple times. He’d felt it during her heat too, but never with anyone else.

“So fucking tight you are, Emma…so gorgeous when you come,” he praised, murmuring in her ear as she came back to herself, dazed and sated.

“You’re the gorgeous one,” she mumbled, “all of the girls on my floor talk about you like a sex god.”

“And what, pray tell, would you tell them after all of this time we’ve spent together?” Killian asked her playfully, nudging his erection against her inner thigh.

“Hmm…well, I’d definitely mention your impressive stamina,” she quipped, pumping her hand up and down his shaft.

“And then I’d tell them that they’d never find out for themselves because you’re MY Alpha,”

The sound of those words coming out of her mouth set Killian’s libido on fire. Quicker than lightning, he flipped her over on the mattress.

“If I’m your Alpha, that makes you my Omega, does it not?” Killian thundered, using a tone that their kind referred to as uniquely Alpha. While it may have been used in the past to force Omegas to submit, contemporary couples used it to spice up bedroom play.

“Yes!” she squeaked with delight, lifting herself up to hands and knees.

“Then present for your Alpha,” he ordered, slapping her on the ass. Immediately, she knelt, pressing her chest down as she sank further back onto her heels.

“Is this what you wanted, Alpha?” she asked sweetly, playing along with the game, which was about mutual consent rather than domination.

“Bloody perfect,” he growled, easing himself into her channel inch by inch, trying to prolong the moment they gave themselves to each other.

They were both so keyed up, emotionally and physically, from the events of the day that Emma cried out almost immediately, unable to stave off a powerful orgasm. Killian held on, pumping into her with determination to satisfy her as much as he could.

“I want your knot, and if you’re really an Alpha, you’ll give it to me,” Emma faux-jeered from below, all a part of the game.

“Are you sure you can handle it?” Killian bit out, watching as drops of his sweat beaded on her back.

“You fucking know it!” she shouted, clenching down on him as encouragement. It was an almost primal moment, the two of them acting on instinct instead of emotions; and moments later, he was coming, locking their bodies together as streams of cum filled her womb.

It took awhile for them both to come back to Earth, floating in a haze of post-orgasmic bliss. Killian felt her sigh contentedly, burrowing a bit closer as he covered them in his downy comforter.

“I’m so glad it’s you, Killian,” Emma told him sleepily, looking back so she could kiss him one last time. He smiled into her neck, gathering her into his arms with a feeling of completeness and affection.

“I couldn’t agree more, love.”

[winthorntales]

where it began…

what it became…

Arik Bane is lost. On the run from a tragic past that still haunts her, the royal wolf shifter is trapped between two paths: to rise above or disappear.  Fate nudges her toward the answer one snowy night when she saves the life of an omega mage and finds her heart bound to a path she least expected.

Ember Snow carries the weight of the world on her fragile shoulders. She's an omega with royal blood, a perfect pawn in a dangerous noble's quest for power. The night she tries to escape this fate, she falls into the arms of a fierce alpha wolf who saves her life with a mate-mark, tethering their souls. 

An unexpected bond blooms as Arik and Ember find solace in each other's arms. But when family burdens and royal treachery crosses their paths, the pair must choose between their desire for what lies ahead and their allegiance to what came before. 

Must Arik and Ember let fate slip between their fingers or will their fated love defy all odds?

Read now 💕

[bardic-tales]

au: omegaverse | au: canon divergent | soulmate | Supernatural

possession vs protection | light vs darkness | consent vs autonomy | found family | healing redemption

In "Bound in Shadows," the bond between Bianca and Sephiroth transcends traditional Alpha-Omega dynamics. It is rooted in a profound soul-bond that connects their minds, bodies, and souls. This is set against the backdrop of Gaia (FF 7's world) where Alphas, Betas, and Omegas navigate complex social hierarchies. This AU reimages the characters' relationships, as it focuses on the intense emotional and spiritual connection between Bianca and Sephiroth.

This is a light A/B/O interpretation.

Content Warnings: abuse, blood, body horror, bondage, captivity, child abuse, coercion, control and domination, cults, dark magic, demons, emotional manipulation, experimentation, gore, harassment, heat cycles, hierarchy and power dynamics, kidnapping, magic, manipulation, menstruation, mind control, non-traditional relationships, omegaverse dynamics, parental abuse, possession, predatory behavior, psychological abuse, religious trauma, ritual sacrifice, self-harm, sexual themes, slavery, stalking, torture, trauma, unhealthy relationships, violence

Universe Plot:

The main storyline follows Bianca, an independent Omega, and Sephiroth, a powerful Alpha, as they navigate the challenges of their bond within a society structured around Omegaverse dynamics. Significant differences from the original plot include Sephiroth’s internal conflict regarding his identity as an Alpha and his desire to protect Bianca, leading to a refusal to mark her. This refusal creates tensions within their relationship and with other characters, particularly Angeal and Genesis, who challenge his decisions. The plot diverges further with the introduction of the Infernal Dominion, where Bianca faces the looming threat of Asmodeus, who seeks to force a union between his family and the Shinra.

Plot Points

The Ritual Marking

Bianca and Sephiroth participate in a marking ritual involving Jenova-enhanced scent exchange, solidifying their soul-bond without traditional marking. The ritual deepens their connection, establishing a visible sigil on their skin that represents their intertwining souls.

The Challenge from Other Alphas

Angeal and Genesis question Sephiroth's refusal to mark Bianca, testing his authority and forcing him to confront his fears. This tension highlights Sephiroth’s internal struggles while emphasizing Bianca's strength as an independent Omega.

Bianca’s Heat and the Heightened Connection

During Bianca’s heat, their soul-bond amplifies, bringing out Sephiroth’s Alpha instincts and testing his restraint. This event deepens their relationship, exploring themes of consent and power dynamics, as Bianca balances her desire for independence with her bond to Sephiroth.

Main Characters:

Aerith Gainsborough (Beta): A nurturing presence in the group, she fosters connections among the characters and provides emotional support to Bianca.

Angeal Hewley (Alpha): Acts as a mediator, providing wisdom and support while questioning Sephiroth's choices regarding Bianca. Asmodeus (Alpha Antagonist): A powerful demon and Bianca’s father, he seeks to manipulate the bond between Bianca and Sephiroth for his own gain.

Bianca (Omega): A strong-willed Omega who challenges traditional expectations; her connection to Sephiroth is enhanced by their soul-bond.

Genesis Rhapsodos (Alpha): A rebellious Alpha who often provokes Sephiroth, challenging his decisions about Bianca.

President Shinra (Alpha Antagonist): The authoritative figure representing the corrupt corporate system that seeks to exploit both Bianca and Sephiroth.

Tifa Lockhart (Beta): Bianca’s confidant and emotional support, Tifa helps her navigate the complexities of her relationship with Sephiroth.

Sephiroth (Alpha): The embodiment of an ultimate Alpha, he is protective of Bianca and struggles with the fear that marking her would corrupt her purity.

Character Dynamics: The relationships among the characters in this AU are complex and multifaceted, with Bianca navigating her strong bond with Sephiroth while contending with the manipulative influences of her father, Asmodeus, and President Shinra. Asmodeus and Shinra embody antagonistic forces that challenge Bianca and Sephiroth’s relationship, pushing them to assert their autonomy. The support from characters like Tifa and Aerith offers a balance to the intense dynamics, helping Bianca to find her strength amidst the struggles against the powerful Alphas in her life.

World Building

Cosmic Elements

Angelic (celestial) and demonic influences: The presence of demons, angels, and other cosmic horrors in this AU enhances the stakes and themes of the narrative.

Angelic and Demonic Influence: Bianca's heritage as the daughter of an archangel and a demon influences her character and abilities, creating a unique perspective on the balance between light and darkness. Her dual nature represents the struggle between these opposing forces, leading to complex character arcs and moral dilemmas.

Conflict with Cosmic Beings: The ongoing threat from cosmic horrors, such as Asmodeus and other demon entities, creates external conflict that forces the characters to confront their fears and insecurities. These beings often manipulate the energies of the Lifestream, impacting the balance of power in their world and driving the narrative tension.

Culture

The cultural landscape in this AU is shaped by the presence of Alphas, Betas, and Omegas, each with specific societal roles and expectations.

Hierarchy and Relationships: Alphas are often seen as leaders, responsible for protecting and providing for their packs, while Omegas are viewed as nurturers and caretakers. This traditional perspective is challenged by Bianca, who embodies independence and strength, rejecting the notion of submissiveness. Betas serve as mediators, often holding influential positions in society that bridge the gap between Alphas and Omegas.

Mating Bonds and Rituals: Mating bonds between Alphas and Omegas are significant cultural events, often accompanied by rituals that solidify their connection. These bonds are celebrated within the community and can involve the exchange of scents or markings that signify commitment. In this AU, the unique marking ritual involving Jenova's influence enhances the spiritual connection between Bianca and Sephiroth.

Magic Systems

The magic system incorporates traditional materia mechanics from Final Fantasy VII while also introducing unique elements related to the Omegaverse.

Cosmic Blood Magic: Bianca and other cosmic entities wield magic powered by their cosmic blood. This allows them to utilize their inherent magical abilities, granting them a versatile source of power that is not limited to materia. Their celestial heritage enables them to perform a wide range of spells and abilities naturally, reflecting their unique connection to the cosmos.

Materia: Materia remains a central aspect of the magic system, with characters harnessing its powers for combat, healing, and elemental manipulation. The ability to combine materia can create powerful effects, allowing characters to tap into the Lifestream’s energies.

Soul Bonds: The soul bond between Bianca and Sephiroth allows them to share emotions, thoughts, and even physical sensations. This connection heightens their magical abilities and can be used strategically in combat or during emotional crises.

Omegaverse Elements

The Omegaverse introduces distinct biological and societal traits that significantly influence character interactions and world dynamics.

Alpha, Beta, Omega Dynamics: In this AU, characters are categorized as Alphas, Betas, or Omegas, each with distinct traits. Alphas exhibit heightened physical abilities and instincts, often taking on leadership roles, while Omegas possess unique reproductive capabilities and emotional sensitivity. Betas act as stabilizers in the social structure, holding significant influence without the biological traits of Alphas and Omegas.

Heat Cycle: Omegas experience both menstruation and a heat cycle, with the latter being a monthly event where their bodies become more receptive to mating and they emit pheromones that attract Alphas. During this time, emotional and physical needs become heightened, leading to challenges in maintaining autonomy and consent. This cycle can create tension within relationships, especially as Bianca navigates her heat in the context of her bond with Sephiroth, who struggles with his protective instincts.

Menstruation: Like in the human experience, menstruation occurs for Omega females, affecting their physical and emotional states. This aspect of their biology adds a layer of realism to their experiences, particularly in how it intersects with their heat cycles and overall health.

Setting

The AU takes place in a reimagined version of the Final Fantasy VII universe, blending its iconic locations with new cultural and societal elements shaped by the Omegaverse framework. Key settings include:

Midgar: The primary hub of activity, Midgar is a sprawling metropolis that serves as the corporate stronghold of Shinra. Within this city, there are distinct districts that reflect the varying socio-economic statuses of its inhabitants, from the affluent Upper Plates to the impoverished slums below. The presence of Alphas, Betas, and Omegas creates distinct neighborhoods where social interactions reflect their hierarchical status.

The Lifestream: A mystical river of energy that flows beneath the Planet, the Lifestream holds the souls of deceased beings and is pivotal in understanding the interconnectedness of life and death. In this AU, it serves as a source of power that both Alphas and Omegas can tap into, particularly in the context of the cosmic beings influencing the world. The Lifestream's energies are coveted by both Shinra and the Infernal Dominion, leading to conflicts over its control.

The Infernal Dominion: A realm populated by demons and fallen angels, the Infernal Dominion is ruled by Asmodeus, representing a darker aspect of the universe. It serves as a juxtaposition to the celestial nature of the protagonists, further emphasizing the balance between light and darkness.

Technology

The technology in this universe reflects a blend of advanced science and mystical elements, especially in relation to Shinra's operations. Key aspects include:

Jenova Technology: Shinra’s experiments with Jenova cells create a technological foundation that blurs the lines between science and magic. This technology is employed to enhance the abilities of SOLDIERs and manipulate the natural order of the world, often leading to ethical dilemmas regarding the treatment of individuals.

Surveillance and Control: Shinra's technology allows for extensive surveillance of the population, utilizing drones and advanced monitoring systems to maintain control over both the populace and their resources. This aspect of technology adds tension to the story as characters navigate the oppressive environment.

Packs

Avalanche

Members: Barrett Wallace, Tifa Lockhart, Cloud Strife, Aerith Gainsborough, Red XIII (Nanaki), Barret's daughter (Marlene Wallace), Wedge, Biggs, Jessie, Reeve Tuesti (Cait Sith), Vincent Valentine, Cid Highwind, Yuffie Kisaragi, and the rest of the AVALANCHE team, along with additional allies they may gather throughout their journey.

Role/Purpose: The AVALANCHE Pack's primary goal is to resist Shinra's oppressive control and save the Planet from destruction caused by the corporation's exploitation of its resources, as well as stopping the Infernal Dominion. They aim to empower the oppressed and foster hope, striving for a future where the Planet and its inhabitants can thrive free from the shackles of corporate greed.

Dynamics: Members of the AVALANCHE Pack interact with a sense of camaraderie and mutual respect, fostering an environment of open communication and collaboration. Their familial bond is strengthened by shared experiences and struggles, allowing them to adapt their roles as needed while collectively pursuing their mission to protect the Planet.

Former SOLDIER Pack

Members: Sephiroth, Bianca, Angeal Hewley, Genesis Rhapsodos, Zack Fair, Kunsel

Role/Purpose: The Ex-SOLDIER Pack was formed from a shared desire to escape Shinra's oppressive control and uncover the truth about their origins. Together, they seek freedom, self-discovery, and a way to overcome the traumas of their pasts while forging a new identity separate from their former lives as SOLDIERs.

Dynamics: The members of the pack interact in a cooperative environment that allows for diverse leadership styles and strengths. With multiple Alphas—Sephiroth, Angeal, Genesis, and Zack—decision-making is collaborative, and Bianca's empathetic nature as the Omega helps maintain harmony, mediating conflicts and fostering strong emotional connections among members.

Infernal Dominion

Members: Asmodeus, Bianca (before she joins Sephiroth's pack), various lesser demons, fallen angels, and loyal enforcers.

Role/Purpose: The primary goal of the Infernal Dominion is to secure a powerful alliance with the Shinra Pack through a mating bond with Bianca, which would grant them access to the Lifestream's energies on Gaia. This alliance would enable Asmodeus to siphon souls from the Planet, replenishing the dwindling souls in Hell and strengthening his dominion over both realms.

Dynamics: Members of the Infernal Dominion operate in a hierarchical structure, with Asmodeus at the top and his loyal followers competing for favor and influence. They engage in strategic manipulation and power plays, forming alliances and rivalries while fostering a sense of loyalty to Asmodeus’s grand design.

Shinra

Members: President Shinra, Rufus Shinra, Heidegger, Palmer, Professor Hojo, Reeve, Scarlet, the Turks, scientists and engineers from the Advanced Weaponry Division, 2nd and 3rd SOLDIERS, and various corporate executives.

Role/Purpose: The Shinra Corporate Pack aims to maintain and expand the company’s power and influence over Midgar and the world. This strategic alliance allows each member to contribute to corporate goals while simultaneously safeguarding their personal interests.

Dynamics: Interactions among members are primarily professional, characterized by a veneer of loyalty that masks underlying opportunism. While the Turks serve as enforcers and problem-solvers for Rufus and the executives, the focus remains on achieving individual agendas within the rigid hierarchy, resulting in weaker bonds compared to more intimate or familial groups.

SOLDIER Pack (Part of Shinra)

Members: The SOLDIER Pack is composed of Roche, a charismatic 3rd Class SOLDIER, along with a group of enthusiastic 2nd and 3rd Class SOLDIERs who share his passion for speed and excitement.

Role/Purpose: The primary goal of the SOLDIER Pack is to uphold the legacy of SOLDIER while embracing their rebellious spirit and thrill-seeking tendencies. They aim to support Shinra's interests by demonstrating their strength and skills in competitive scenarios that enhance the company's reputation.

Dynamics: Members interact in a highly competitive environment where camaraderie is built through rivalry and exhilarating challenges. Roche’s dramatic flair fosters a culture of flamboyance and recklessness, encouraging strong bonds through shared experiences of adrenaline and the thrill of high-speed confrontations.

The Turks (part of Shinra)

Members: Tseng, Cisseni, Reno, Rude, Elena, and other supporting members of the Turk organization.

Role/Purpose: The Turks serve as Shinra's elite covert operatives, executing high-stakes missions and maintaining order in the shadows. Their primary goal is to protect Shinra's interests, often through clandestine operations, while also fostering a strong sense of loyalty and protection among their members.

Dynamics: Within the Turks, interactions are characterized by a blend of camaraderie and professional rivalry, with each member contributing their unique skills to the group’s success. Despite the hierarchical structure led by Tseng, a deep sense of loyalty exists among the members, often prioritizing their personal bonds over corporate allegiance, which can lead to tensions when conflicts of interest arise.

Differences from the Original Universe

Introduction of Original Character: Bound in Shadows features Bianca, an original character whose complex backstory and motivations are not part of the Final Fantasy VII universe. Her unique heritage as the daughter of an archangel and a demon adds depth to the narrative, allowing for new themes of duality and internal conflict that are distinct from the existing characters in FFVII.

Character Dynamics: The relationships among characters are reimagined through the Omegaverse framework, introducing complexities based on Alpha, Beta, and Omega hierarchies. This redefinition creates a fresh take on character interactions and emotional connections that differ from the original game's portrayals.

Soul-Bond Concept: Bound in Shadows introduces the concept of a soul-bond between characters, which plays a crucial role in driving their emotional and physical relationships. This metaphysical connection adds depth to their struggles and vulnerabilities, setting it apart from the more straightforward relationships depicted in FFVII.

Primal Instinct Exploration: The narrative dives into the primal instincts associated with Alpha and Omega roles, influencing character motivations and plot developments. This exploration provides a new perspective on character behavior and relationships, contrasting with the static roles in the original game.

Societal Structure: The AU presents a detailed societal hierarchy based on Alpha, Beta, and Omega dynamics, shaping cultural norms and character interactions. This contrasts with FFVII, where social structures are less explicitly defined and focus more on overarching conflicts.

Rituals and Bonding: The introduction of marking rituals tied to the Omegaverse, including scent exchange, serves as a significant plot device that solidifies relationships without traditional markings. This element differs from FFVII's handling of relationships, where such rituals do not exist.

Focus on Personal Conflicts: The central conflicts in Bound in Shadows are more intimate, revolving around personal struggles within the Omegaverse framework, such as societal expectations and pressures from other Alphas. This contrasts with FFVII's focus on larger, external conflicts involving corporations and global threats.

Themes of Consent and Autonomy: The AU emphasizes themes of consent and personal autonomy, especially regarding the implications of heat cycles and the power dynamics involved in relationships. This focus on nuanced consent stands in contrast to the action-oriented themes prevalent in FFVII.

Rules and Mechanics

Omegaverse Dynamics

Hierarchy: The society is structured around Alphas, Betas, and Omegas, each with distinct roles and social expectations. Alphas are typically seen as dominant, Betas are neutral, and Omegas are often perceived as nurturing and submissive.

Heat Cycles: Omegas experience heat cycles, during which their instincts drive them to seek a mate. During this time, their bond with their Alpha intensifies, allowing for shared emotional and physical experiences. Consent remains central to navigating this dynamic.

Soul-Bond Mechanics

Connection: The bond between Bianca and Sephiroth allows them to share thoughts and emotions, enhancing their understanding of each other's fears and desires. This bond is strengthened through rituals and shared experiences, making their connection deeper than traditional A/B/O dynamics.

Visual Representation: Their soul-bond manifests as a visible sigil on their skin, symbolizing their commitment and connection, which can also offer them mutual protection and strength during battles.

Scent Marking

Role in Relationships: Instead of traditional marking, characters can engage in scent marking rituals that enhance emotional bonds without compromising Bianca’s autonomy. This process allows for the sharing of scents that represent their feelings, strengthening their connection.

Emotional Significance: Scent plays a crucial role in establishing emotional ties, with specific scents evoking memories and feelings, reinforcing their connection in both emotional and physical realms.

Power Dynamics

Character Strengths: Each character possesses unique strengths and weaknesses based on their roles within the Omegaverse. Alphas like Sephiroth are expected to embody strength and leadership, while Omegas like Bianca navigate societal perceptions of their roles.

Conflict Resolution: Conflicts arising from the dynamics between Alphas and Omegas lead to discussions about power, consent, and personal agency, driving character development and relationships forward.

Influence of Jenova Cells

Biological and Emotional Effects: The presence of Jenova cells in characters influences their physical abilities and emotional states. This dynamic complicates relationships, as characters must navigate their innate urges alongside societal expectations and personal desires. Those affected by Jenova may struggle with feelings of isolation and horror due to their connection to this cosmic entity.

[hellfire--cult]

Edit of Eddie: pitifulbaby

Chapters: Masterlist (Go here to see list of chapters, plotline and general warnings.)

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Tropes: Enemies to Lovers, Non-Traditional Omegaverse, Slow burn, Modern!AU, Mechanic!Eddie

⚠️18+: angst at the beginning, sexual tension, mutual pining, mentions of nausea but from nerves, hints of jealousy, sneaking around, kissing, allusions to smut

wc: 14.1k

A/N: It didn't take a month for Roe to update, SUCCESS! The slow burn is finally burning folks. @andvys always proofreads, so a lovely shoutout to the bestie 💕

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CHAPTER 19

He was scared.

He was so scared.

He didn’t know what he was feeling or what is what he should be feeling at all. Who was he? Who is he? What is he? How can he live like this?

“Son, I told you I would protect you, no matter what. I got the best doctors–”

“I’m a fucking freak! Why me!? I have it rough in life as it is, and now I have to live with this fucking condition!?” He was crying into his hands, sobbing, not caring if he was smearing his mucus all over him because in his sixteen years of life, he never thought he would have a physical condition to live with apart from the emotional one. The turmoil and hurricane of trauma and emotions he was born into, and now he had to add this shit on top of all of that.

“You are the strongest boy I’ve ever met, and this– this is new Eddie, but I’m glad I could come across Dr. Murray… He was the only one who identified it.” Everything was so expensive. Everything his uncle had to pay and put himself in debt for Eddie to be checked and for medicine that did nothing until this mysterious man helped him and now he is better, even if it’s just little. 

“New!? I– How can someone live like this!? It hurts and I feel like I’m losing myself each second it passes!” He felt so angry, his sobs becoming rougher, more like groans rather than cries. His breathing became heavy as he looked at his uncle who was trying to be strong for his nephew, his features twitching as his adam’s apple bobbed up and down in a gulp.

“I know, I know–”

“NO YOU DON’T!” And Eddie’s hand grabbed the lamp that was on his night table and simply ripped it off the wall, the light going off, and then he sent it flying against his closet door, shattering the bulb and breaking the top cap from the metal. He was panting, feeling his body as if it were in the pits of hell, and he was so angry, just furious and filled with rage, but–

He looked at his hands, trembling as he frowned in worry, because he never intended to smash his lamp. He never intended to have an outburst like this but he couldn’t help it. It was too late when his body reacted before his mind did. Wayne was standing next to him with widened eyes, glossed over, and he slowly embraced his nephew in a tight hug.

“Son…” And Eddie only cried into his uncle’s shoulder, holding tightly onto him. How is he supposed to live like this? With these outbursts? With this way of living? How is he going to afford it? Is there a chance to have friends with someone like him? A lover? 

Will he remain lonely forever?

He grumbled in his sleep, shifting on the bed as he moved to his side. He was slowly gaining consciousness once again, hearing soft droplets of rain smashing against the window, and a distant thunder being heard. His nose picked up scents, various ones. The most potent one though was floral, a perfume. That made him open his eyes.

He slowly sat up, rubbing his eyes with his hands and letting out a big yawn. His eyes were still squinting from just waking up but he looked around to find himself in your room, and it was not a surprise to him at all. He looked down on himself to see the shirt he lent you when you passed out after your first kiss. Eddie groaned as he stretched out, putting his hands all the way up, feeling his back pop.

“Shit…” He exclaimed and sighed out as he relaxed once more, a bit more awake now. He looked at the floor, seeing his clothes from the night before there, while yours were on the chair against your desk. He eyed the black dress, remembering it bunched up on your stomach as you bounced on him. He closed his eyes as he gathered his thoughts, trying to forget how good you looked taking him, or how you moaned his name, or rather screamed it, or how you drooled–

He groaned as he felt himself growing a bit hard, opening his eyes to throw the sheets off him so he could glare at the bulge of his boxers. He is definitely not coming out of your room until that dies down a bit. He sighed as he sat at the edge of your bed, feet on the wooden floor. He looked to the side to see a picture of you and Robin at work so it seemed. You were half smiling, while Robin was full of teeth in the picture. He wondered if this was taken when you barely moved here, your expression rather cold than excited, compared to how you were now.

He stood up from the bed to walk towards your desk, seeing a picture now of yourself and your mom in your teenage years, probably when you were fifteen or sixteen. That age made Eddie’s eyebrow twitch, but he focused on your mom. You had her eyes. He wondered what your father looked like, someone you haven’t talked much about with him, and he doesn’t see a picture of him around your room.

He turned to look at your vanity now, a smirk appearing on his lips as he remembered how the two of you played cat and mouse the day of the club. He remembers your face, watching you in the mirror while you remained oblivious. He could see and sense how much you were thinking, how conflicted with your arousal towards him you felt. He grabbed your perfume and he sniffed the cap of it, a shiver being sent through his entire system. 

Eddie put it down and then he could the other scents again. Coffee and something sweet. Pancakes? Maybe waffles. Should he put pants on to greet you? He frowned at that thought process because– who the fuck cares at this point?

But he couldn’t deny the nerves he was feeling, because he didn’t know what was really going to happen when he walked out of this room. He didn’t know what he wanted you to say, or what he wanted you to do. There’s one thing he knew. His eyes went to your bed, remembering the night before after the two of you got to your house.

You two didn’t talk at all. The only words were that he could take anything from the fridge and then him asking if you had something for him to wear for bed. Then it was him offering to sleep on the couch but you had denied it, telling him it would be hypocritical to do that now. He couldn’t agree more, and after each of you took turns in the bathroom, you slipped into your bed.

Someone would have probably gotten the itch to touch again, to feel the other person once more, to kiss them and hold them, but as soon as his head touched your pillow, and his eyes closed, he was gone. He didn’t know how exhausted he was, and that was probably because of just how much of him he released yesterday night. He had been trying to satisfy himself the entire week and nothing felt right. Nothing felt like it felt with you. 

And now, the thing he knows is what he wants on that bed of yours. He doesn’t want to just sleep on it next time. He wants to make a mess out of it, probably break it, make you buy a new one since he knows with whom you shared that bed with. A bastard that could not change an inch for you. A bastard who didn’t deserve you at all after how selfish he was with you. Yeah… he wants to break that fucking bed so you could get a new one. One you would baptize with him. A bed you would have only used with him.

He shook his head in shock, pressing his fingers against his forehead, trying to push those kinds of thoughts away. Fuck– He has to keep that shit in check. It doesn’t happen often, and it shouldn’t happen with you. Especially not with you.

He clenched his jaw as he cracked his neck from side to side, taking deep breaths as he looked at your door. He then looked down at his boxers and– okay, good, it’s gone. He walked towards the night table again and picked up his ponytail, putting it in his mouth as he opened the door of your room and started putting his hair up in a bun, and in three steps he was in your living room. 

You were preparing the last batch of waffles, coffee ready in the pot. Syrup on the island counter as well as nutella and strawberries. You didn’t know what he liked, but he will have to eat whatever you have. You honestly didn’t know if you were going to be able to digest anything down because there was just a rollercoaster of nerves and it never stops, not until you two have a talk.

You heard the door opening and then barefoot steps, making your body flush in anticipation. You were wearing a loose silk long black camisole, very open and comfortable to sleep well and– it was pretty. You weren’t going to deny the fact you now felt like riling him up at any given chance, but you honestly didn’t think of it yesterday night. You could have changed this morning, but where was the fun in that?

But you knew that today was not for fun. You two had to talk. You two had to have a rational and adult talk about what was going on between you. You both cannot just go and say fuck it, you have to either have conditions or really look into the pros and cons of this situation.

But, first… you have to face him. So you turn your head over your shoulder to see him leaning against the door frame as he tied his hair up in the messy bun you know him for and fuck. Fuck. Fuck. What is he doing to you? You fucked him two times only and you already want a third one? You have to control yourself. 

“That smells fucking good.” His voice was hoarse and he finished putting his hair up, finally looking up to see you. His body turned into a furnace in just a second, biting the inside of his cheek as he scanned the back of your legs, his eyes taking in every inch of exposed skin as he could. “Well, damn.”

No more hiding whenever you two check eachother out so it seems. It makes you feel weird, nice, but weird. You cleared your throat and pointed at the stool next to the island counter where the plates were.

“None of that. Sit down.” You quickly turned to take the last waffles out of the waffle maker and put them on the plate that already had six waffles on it. 

“Demanding. I like it.” A shiver ran down your spine at the compliment. It… was a compliment, wasn’t it? Or rather, a kinky remark. Your face heated up when you remembered how you acted the night before. Yeah, it was definitely because of that.

You unplugged the waffle maker and grabbed the plate, turning around to put it in the middle of the counter, in front of Eddie. You could sit next to him, but for the sake of keeping this civil and adultlike, you sit across from him, earning a soft chuckle from his part.

“Nothing…” He knew you were keeping distance in order not to come onto him, because he doesn’t know what he would have done to you if you sat next to him. He understands. A conversation has to be had first, and he will wait for you to start it, even if he wants to launch himself across the counter to have you on the kitchen floor. He prefers something else than the waffle he is serving himself on his plate as you fill the glasses with water.

“What’s so funny?”

You didn’t know how to start, the whole preparation of waffles done in complete silence. You saw how he put maple syrup as well as nutella, and– Your eyes went wide when he was putting everything you put on the table, including the strawberries and chocolate chips.

“Eddie, that’s– How can you eat that!?” You were surprised, not knowing he had a sweet tooth for this. Your own waffle was simple, whipped cream and strawberries. His? It was a monstrosity. He stopped mid squirting more chocolate syrup on his pancake and looked up at you with a squint of his eyes.

“I’m a growing man. I need my nutrients.” 

You stared at him in surprise and then you finally let out a snort, covering your mouth as you started laughing into it. You heard him follow you right behind and– you didn’t notice how tense you were. You didn’t notice just how hard your shoulders were even before he came into the kitchen, and this interaction finally made you relax because… he was still Eddie.

“Nutrients? That is a nuclear bomb, Munson!” 

“Bomb!? I take offense to that. This is barely something.” At that, you heard the squirt of the syrup as another gush of chocolate dripped down and you raised your hands to signal him to stop.

“Okay, enough! When I said you could take anything from the fridge, I didn’t mean for you to use up ALL of my things!” He shot a pouty lip your way and you shook your head at him as he put down the bottle of chocolate syrup. 

“This is a prison.” You rolled your eyes, but the nerves you felt flew away thanks to him breaking the ice. It almost looked like nothing happened between the two of you yesterday night, but the soreness in between your legs told you otherwise. You took this chance to take a bite out of your own waffle before your stomach closed up once more.

“Do you get waffles in prison?” You heard him chew and then talk with his mouth full, making you wince in disgust and scrunch up your nose at him.

“If you suck a cop’s dick, probably.” 

“Ugh–” You disgustingly looked away, clenching your eyes at the image. It wasn’t pleasant at all, but it still made you giggle, the ice breaking even more than before, letting you take another bite of your waffle. You were unaware of the intense gaze that was being directed your way right across the counter. 

He was glad to make you lose the tension you were carrying, but he really wanted to get this talk out of the way and know your true feelings or intentions with what the two of you had going on right now. He let you finish the waffle as he devoured his and he was about to start preparing a second one, but a clear of your throat made him look at you expectantly.

“Yes? I promise I’m not going to use all the nutella–”

“We have to talk.” You blurted out. The quicker you get this over with, the quicker you two can decide what route your friendship takes from today on. He blinked your way a few times and then took a sharp breath in, pushing the plate away to cross his arms over the table, leaning with his elbows. 

“Yeah, you start.” What? Fuck. What do you say? What do you ask? You didn’t really think of what to say of the situation or how to start talking about it. You felt your heart beating into your ears, the tension now back on your shoulder as he wiped the corner of his mouth with his thumb and licked it while keeping his gaze on you.

Oh, what an asshole.

“What the fuck are we doing?” It came out from deep within your soul. It was a question you have asked yourself the week before, and today as soon as you woke up and saw him sleeping next to you. What the actual fuck are you doing? What the fuck is he doing? Where do you both think this is going?

He was not prepared for that question. Taken aback, he sits a bit straighter in his stool, looking down at his food in thought. He had to be the most honest possible today, cause if he wasn’t, he might not have another night with you ever again.

“Fucking. That’s what.” You rolled your eyes at that answer. It wasn’t the one you expected even though you didn’t know exactly what you wanted.

“For fuck sake, that’s not what I meant, and you know that.” 

“Then what do you mean?” His eyes locked with yours again and you fought the butterflies that were disrupting your insides as you looked down at your plate.

“We… We couldn’t stand eachother before, then we finally built a friendship, a good one and–” You closed your eyes as you tried to look for words as carefully as possible but there was no need for that. He understood you, and he also had that same train of thought once. But then, he tasted you, and gone were all consequences from having more of you from his mind.

“I get it… We don’t have to lose that friendship, you know?” You scoffed at that, shaking your head.

“What if one day something goes wrong, like I mentioned before?” Your eyes locked with his again as you continued talking, pouring your thoughts out. “What if I get a partner one day? Or– you do? I don’t know if they’re going to let us keep talking to one another if they find out we slept with eachother. Multiple Times at that.” 

Oh… he didn’t think of that. He felt his stomach twist with distaste at your words, at your rationality. He hated the fact you were right, but he also hated the thought of not talking to you again… or was it hating the fact he might lose your touch someday? But he knows something you don’t–

“I don’t have the same chances to date as you do.” His eyes looked at his plate again and his words caught your attention, staring at his form. You could sense sadness coming from the way his shoulders are slightly slumped, yet still tense, signaling you it was a sensitive topic.

“Why do you say that?” He took a sharp breath in as he looked at you with a determined gaze, something that signaled you to stop asking questions, a shiver running from top to bottom in your body.

“I just know. But you are right, I didn’t think of that.” And he probably would have never thought about that possibility. You felt dejected by the way he changed the topic from him, and the memory of the flask in his bathroom cabinet came back to your mind. Was he sick? You knew there might be something going on with him, but you didn’t think it could be that serious. 

“Yeah…” You two remained silent for a while, the appetite gone as you looked at the plate before you. This was… not how you expected it to go either. Rationally, you should stop this, but deep down you really don’t want it to be over. Your stomach twisted, feeling regret for your choice of words or what you brought to the table that made Eddie be the one to back out this time.

You took a sip of your water as you heard him take another bite. You wondered what he was thinking right now. Maybe coming to terms you two have to go back to the way you were? Go back to your boring hook up tales? Fuck, you were not ready to go back to looking through your contacts to find someone to satisfy you, now knowing someone like Eddie exists. You jumped when you heard his rough voice talk again.

“I don’t want to stop this.” 

Your eyes widened slightly, gazing back up at him and his eyes were piercing through you, waiting for your reaction. Your belly did a flip, and your thighs tightened against one another and maybe you imagined it, but you saw one of Eddie’s lips twitch upwards for just a second. You gulped as you straightened up in your own stool. He was being honest with you, and maybe this time you could push rationality aside.

What’s wrong with some fun between friends?

“Me neither…”

The air in the room changed. It became heavy, almost humid, a tad suffocating. You saw his jaw clenching as he stared at you, and you couldn’t look away. It was almost as if he were hypnotizing you, telling you to come closer, to move towards him, but you remained seated, clearing your throat for him to continue the talk.

“Then, I guess we start establishing rules.” Your eyebrows raised in surprise to then squint at him in question as he leaned forward to rest his elbows on the counter, his plate in the middle, and his chin on top of his joined hands. You copied his stance, suddenly feeling as if this were some tense job meeting going on with him, a smirk breaking on his lips.

“Rules?”

“Yes. What we can and can’t do. What we like and what we don’t. And how we do this arrangement.” 

“How we do–” 

“If we schedule it for certain days, or if we simply call eachother up.” Oh. A pang of something stabbed you in the side of your stomach, feeling as if something was boiling inside of it.

“You seem experienced doing these kinds of arrangements.” He was looking at you with amusement in his eyes, his body starting to tremble with the need of touching you again for how you were acting once more with him.

“Jealous again?” You rolled your eyes as you shook your head.

“I am pointing out something that seems obvious, that’s all.” He hummed at your response. Bullshit, but this is not the time for some flirty bantering because it will end with you being railed into on top of this counter and the waffles you prepared on the floor.

“Okay, so, back to before, what’s it going to be?” He was curious for your answer, wondering if you were thinking the same thing he was. You bit the inside of your cheek in thought as you looked away from him to think. If you scheduled it, you would have a secured fuck once or twice per week… but if you two called eachother… maybe there’s more…

“I guess calling. It’s how I normally do it.” Oh you were a fucking– His jaw went to the side as he grinded his teeth together. He wasn’t going to be the only one pissed in here. 

“Good, same thought process.” You took a deep breath in as you controlled the burning anger inside your chest. So you were just a normal hook up to him, huh. You turned to look at him again, his eyes now more fierce than before and you felt a little smaller than you did seconds ago for whatever reason.

“What else?”

“Hmm… What we do and what we don’t.” Your eyebrows frowned for a second as you thought about that answer.

“Definitely not telling the group.” You remembered how Steve sighed of relief knowing you hadn’t slept with Eddie. It signaled you that you should never do it, yet here you are, having a talk with him on how to do this whole friends with benefits thing.

“Alright, I can agree on that one… Um, no acting awkward. Like I said I–” He wanted to be honest with you, feeling his heart clench in his chest as he pulled his arms back down, now pushing the plate away to cross them over the counter, leaning forward. “I want to keep the friendship with you. We have fun together and we laugh at what we send eachother and we talk about our days–”

“Yes.” You were happy. A small smile appeared on your lips as your shoulders lost the tension, putting your arms down and hands resting on your lap. He smiled back at you, leaning back again.

“Okay… Um… staying over?” It was an interesting question. He almost never spent nights with his hook ups, nor did he like them staying over, but he really does not mind it with you, in fact, he wants you to stay. Your hands felt sweaty all of a sudden as you flushed all over.

“I… don’t mind that.” He wanted to sigh of relief. It was two times in a row that you had woken up before him, and he really wanted to see you sleeping too. Wake up first to look at you for a while. He didn’t really know why he wanted to do that, but he was curious to know how you looked as you slept, and as you slowly woke up.

“Perfect… anything else?”

“Condoms are a must.” He rolled his eyes at you but nodded nonetheless. You were nervous at this other step, but since Eddie was probably going to be a very recurrent hook up– “And we need to get tested.”

“What?” He was shocked at your request, his eyebrows frowning in confusion as he stared at you. You took a nervous breath in and looked down at your lap as you played with your fingers.

“Yeah, I mean… It’s not like we are going to fuck once every two weeks…” He smirked at that, a chuckle escaping his lips.

“Damn Peach, how many times are you planning to fuck me per week?” You felt burning on your cheeks, on your whole face as your eyes shot back up to look at him.

“I– I– That’s not what I meant! But–” Fuck, you dug this hole all by yourself. He laughed at your reaction and continued talking.

“I never said I disliked the idea.” Your eyes connected with his and the air didn’t enter your lungs for about three seconds. Fuck, he has you wrapped around his fucking finger, doesn’t he. He continued talking after nodding once, “Fine. We both get checked.” 

You sighed in relief, giving a nod as well in appreciation to his answer. You were getting checked either way, your annual visit already coming up. But if you were completely honest… you didn’t see yourself fucking someone else other than Eddie for a long while… you knew no one could fuck you or fill you the way he did, and for now, you are becoming a tad addicted to it.

“Thank you.” You waited to see if there were any other conditions he would like to comment on, but you saw him thinking, maybe trying to remember anything he might have missed. He looked good while he was in thought. Fuck. 

“That’s that. What about what we like?” He looked back at you and you felt a little bold after this talk, a new surge of confidence coming in now that you know you have him and he has you for an indefinite time. 

“I guess we can find out along the way.” He felt a chill run down his arms as he stared at you, surprised by your response, yet he couldn't help the twitch that was happening inside his boxers. Oh he wants to find it all out. He wants to know everything, if you like to be smacked, choked, tied up, pulled, manhandled to his liking, but he already knows that. He remembers how he held you up against the wall and you were in complete bliss from it, or how he smacked you yesterday and even if you were surprised, you didn’t tell him to not do it again. 

He wondered if you would let him put his hand around your throat.

The waffles were forgotten as the temperature in the room got hotter each second that passed, at each stolen glance and each breath taken. The hunger was now for something else entirely, and for him, it was sitting right across, and in between a pair of thighs. So why not take it after everything was said and done?

He got up from the stool, your breathing quickening as you saw him slowly round the counter, his hand gracing the marble on top and his eyes never left yours. Your thighs clenched again, or maybe it was something else that clenched, because you started feeling hot with need. How could it be? Your thighs hurt from the position of yesterday night, and you were obviously oversensitive, and it will probably be a tad painful at first but–

“How about we start finding out, Peach?”

Fuck. Now that the barrier was gone, the line was completely erased, and the only thing you had to do was wrap your arms around his neck to get him, it only made your belly yell in need of him. You’re in deep shit now. You turned around in your stool to slowly open your legs for him to step in between. He smirked at the action, his mouth salivating at the invitation and he licked the inside of his bottom lip as one of his hands came to hold the side of your face, stepping in between your parted thighs.

You closed your eyes as you let his touch render you stupid even if for just a second and he tilted his head with amusement. You’re gonna be the fucking death of him. You opened your pretty eyes, begging silently for him to do something, anything at all. His hunger for you grew, and his face started getting close to yours as your hands went to hold onto his waist, your breaths mixing with one another’s and–

RING.

Your heads snapped towards the kitchen door, and you both frowned in confusion at it. Eddie slowly turned to you, a low whisper in his lips.

“Were you expecting someone–”

And then, the yell of a frantic Robin calling out your name, “ARE YOU IN THERE!? ARE YOU ALIVE!?”

Your eyes widened as you gasped, your hands slamming against your mouth and then Eddie stared at you alarmingly as you moved down from the stool, him pulling away from you as you two went to the living room to look at the front door. You whispered to him, but it was more like a silent yell.

“I don’t– I don’t remember inviting her–” Realization hit you like a train wreck. Last night. In the middle of your endeavors with Eddie, when taking the condom out of your purse you had seen your phone glinting with notifications… and you never charged your phone when you returned… and when you woke up, checking your phone was the least of your problems. “Oh, fuck–”

“Peach, you’re a fucking–” He made a movement as if he wanted to strangle you but he contained himself when more banging was heard, making him jump.

“I SWEAR TO GOD, I DON’T CARE IF YOU’RE WITH SOMEONE IN THERE, BUT I’M COMING IN WITH MY SPARE KEY!” You gasped, pushing Eddie into your room, and your closet wasn’t big enough for a person to fit. You were both panicking and then you closed the door when you heard the lock of your front door being opened. 

“Don’t make a fucking sound!” You grabbed Eddie and threw him onto the bed, an oof coming out of him and before he could say anything, you immediately threw the comforter all over him. Your heart was in your throat as you heard Robin calling out your name in your living room. Act normal, for fuck sake act normal.

You got out of your room, tip toeing, pretending to close the door slowly, seeing Robin relax in her spot, her hand on her chest as she breathed heavily. You made a shushing sound as the door fully closed. You walked towards her, the vile lie appearing in your throat.

“What are you doing here!?” You whispered-yelled and she looked at you as if you had grown a second head, her eyes bulging out of her scalp as she waved her hands at you.

“Why the fuck are you whispering!? I haven’t heard from you since yesterday night! I know I was drunk but I remembered you left and–”

“Shh!!” You wildly signaled your door and she looked over your shoulder with a confused frown and then back at you, a whisper this time.

“Who the fuck is in there, and why the hell did you not answer!?” You rolled your eyes, sighing.

“I forgot because well, I was kind of you know… busy. And then I forgot to charge it and I just woke up.” Robin now raises an eyebrow at you, looking towards the kitchen, and then back at you. You felt like you were sweating all over as you awaited for her answer, begging for Eddie to not make a fucking sound from your room.

“I smell food though… Are you lying to me?” When did Robin become so observant? Fuck–

“Um… yeah I prepared them and went back to bed–” You saw how her eyes fixated on the door, her head cocking to the side and you felt your heart in your throat, pulsating, feeling your vein about to pop. Is she putting the pieces together?

“You left with Eddie last night.” Fuck– You felt your forehead sweating, your fingertips running cold as you started feeling the waffle swirling in your stomach.

“Yeah…?” You tried to sound confused, nonchalant, as much as you could.

“And he brought you home.” Her eyes were back on you, a squint appearing as you admitted defeat by now. You sighed and looked down, nodding at her. It was no use to lie to Robin anymore is there?

“Robs–” And suddenly Robin gasps, and you raise your head to look at her, your mouth opening to talk to her, but a cheeky smile appears on her lips, confusing you. Her voice now whispered as she pointed at your room’s door.

“Is that Jeff?”

Your eyes were wide as you stared at her. What…? How the fuck did she– Your lie. She thinks you actually did sleep with Jeff before, and she thinks… Oh, this is great. This can save your ass and Eddie’s in more ways than one. You pretended to shush her again, your eyes widening in faux worry.

“Lower your voice!” She giggled and rolled her eyes as she bit her bottom lip. She moved her eyebrows up and down, making your stomach turn and turn, not wanting her to ask any questions. 

“So Eddie is being your wingman?” You rolled your eyes and were about to speak– “Do you think he’ll stay for long? I want to stay to cure this hangover and I deserve your waffles for the worry you made me go through!”

You felt a cold sweat as nerves wracked you all over. She crossed her arms in front of her chest as you opened your mouth to protest, denying you from saying no. Fuck. Shit. You looked at your bedroom door and back at her nervously.

“He doesn’t know all of you know, just that Eddie knows!” 

“I’ll just stay in the kitchen! I won’t say hi to him or anything!” She giggled at you and you saw her walking to your kitchen and you felt your heart drop to your stomach. How the fuck are you going to pull this off? Fuck, fuck, fuck.

You rushed into your room, seeing Eddie pulling the blanket off of him, his hair all wild despite the bun. You were wincing as you looked around, not really knowing what to do while Eddie got up from the bed, still in his boxers and the shirt you lent him. He whispered to you once more as he looked at the door.

“What the fuck is going on, did Buckley leave?” He asked and you looked at him, shaking your head, biting your bottom lip.

“No… fuck, no, she didn’t and she won’t leave and is going to stay and–” You winced while looking at him, knowing he was going to be mad. “I told her Jeff was in my room…”

His eyes widened as he watched you in complete shock, his hands starting to wave around, not believing you lied with Jeff again instead of saying he was a random person. 

“Peach, what the fuck–”

“Think about it! If you ever say you are ‘taking me home’ and it’s just the two of us in the car, they will always believe you’re taking me to Jeff’s!” He couldn’t believe your lie, but he also couldn’t deny that it does make sense and that it works for the two of you. He didn’t fucking like it, he hated it. He hated that everything he did to you was going to be tarnished by Jeff’s image, and he groaned in distaste but nodded at you nonetheless.

“Fine. Fine. Now tell me how the fuck I’m supposed to get out of here! We know she is going to peek, so how the shit are we doing this!?” He was whisper/yelling and you bit the nail on your index finger, looking around and then at the door. An idea popped in your head, and it was risky, but it was the only solution, or the only viable way of escape for Eddie.

“Okay… okay… I’ll distract her, and you sneak out… I’ll try to make her not face the door.” He was looking at you, a fake smile appearing on his lips as he crossed his arms.

“What a great fucking plan!” He was being sarcastic and you glared at him, slapping his arm. 

“Any other good ideas!?” You saw him sighing and his head falling back, displaying his neck to you. This was not the time for you to stare at his veins, or the bite you left there the day before. You sighed and nodded, trying to look away from him to focus somewhere else. “Okay, I need to get out before she becomes suspicious…”

You saw him look back down and nod, sighing. Oh… shit, how are your greetings going to be? Do you… kiss him? You want to kiss him, but what if he thinks it’s weird? Should you wait for him to do it? What if he doesn’t do it? He was looking at you, his head slightly tilting to the side and your heart banged on your chest as you just looked at him, waiting.

And he realized it. You were expecting him and he wanted nothing more than to do that. He wanted to kiss you again the moment he woke up, hungry for you as the memories came back to him as consciousness was fully reincorporated in his mind again. He was a bit insecure, not knowing if this was a barrier for the two of you, something that is more intimate than just having sex. 

But it was kind of stupid to worry about that now, wasn’t it?

So he took a step towards you, and you felt your breathing cutting off as he got closer. You licked your lips absentmindedly and Eddie wanted to groan at the sight, devour them and Robin can go to hell for all he cares. He wants to throw you on the bed again and make you moan, scream, pant, but now he has to say goodbye to you and he fucking hates it.

His hand was about to reach for your waist when the two of you heard glass breaking and a yell. Your eyes widened as you two pulled back, looking behind you at the door as well as Eddie. He was worried but he couldn’t run out to check on Robin, but the itch was there, needing to make sure his friend was okay. 

“Okay, um– I’ll talk to you later, whatever happened I’ll take care of it and you use that to your advantage to sneak out.” You looked back at him and you two stared into each other's eyes in silence, waiting to see if a move was made, if one would take the leap to greet one another the way you both want to. 

But another yelp made you snap out and your worry made you turn around and motion for him all over your room for him to change. He gave you a quick nod, letting you know he got the message. You took a deep breath in as you quickly got out of the room, closing the door behind you and rushing to the kitchen to see Robin in the sink, her hand under it as water ran down, washing herself off. Her head turned over her shoulder, a sheepish smile on her lips.

“I uh… a glass slipped from my hand…”

“Did you… grab a waffle with your bare hand and use that same hand to grab the glass?” You said this as if this has happened before, and yes it has. Four times, at least those were the amount of times you were present at. Robin often forgot that waffles use butter on the pans so they wouldn’t stick. She whined and looked at you with helplessness. 

“Don’t make fun of me and help me! I picked up a shard and cut my finger…” She pouted at you and you already knew that it was the smallest thing ever, a splinter maybe. You walked towards her, avoiding the glass on the floor. You stood next to her, grabbing her wrist and taking it out from under the water to look at it. Yeah, you couldn’t even see it. 

“It’s just a little splinter Robin–”

“Still hurts!” She sounded like a child, but that’s just who your best friend was. You took this opportunity to sit her on the stool, her back facing the kitchen’s door. You turned on the light and grabbed her wrist again, putting the index finger closer to your eye. You really couldn’t see shit, so you pressed on it, making Robin yelp again. 

“It’s so tiny Robin, I can’t even see it!” She whined, her feet kicking a bit as she pouted at you.

“I can feel it!” You sighed, shaking your head at her.

“Okay, try to look for it yourself, you know where it hurts.” She nodded at you and she put her index finger close to her eye, inspecting it carefully with help of her other hand as you watched her. Out of your peripheral vision you saw a shadow and you looked up to see Eddie tiptoeing with his boots in his hand, now wearing the clothes from the night before. Your eyes widened as your heart beat rapidly in your chest. 

If Robin were to feel his presence and turn around, you’re both screwed– Eddie’s eyes widened as he motioned with his free hand the open door of the kitchen with a ‘Are you serious?’ face on and, okay, you were stupid leaving that open. He has all the right to be looking at you like you were a moron. You rolled your eyes and gave a strong tilt towards where your front door is. He looked at your front door and then back at you, making your heart skip a beat.

He made a motion with his free hand, as if he were texting on his phone and you nodded, getting the message. Robin’s head suddenly snapped up towards you and you felt the blood leave your face as she looked at you with a confused frown. Eddie’s eyes widened and froze in his place.

“What are you looking at?” She was about to turn her head and your hand went to grab her index finger and press, making Robin turn again towards you and yell, ripping her finger away from you, “OW! What is wrong with you!?”

“Just… trying to help?” Eddie gave you one more alarmed look and ran off. You were breathing heavily and then, the front door clicked and you finally relaxed, relief flooding your limbs. Robin’s eyebrows met in the middle as she snapped her head around and then back at you with her mouth opened and an offended gaze.

“Did he walk behind me and you distracted me!?”

You smiled innocently and shrugged, trying not to show just how nervous this whole situation made you. 

And you regretted not telling Eddie goodbye the way you wanted to.

It was as if nothing happened between the two of you.

Memes being sent, Eddie bashing on you for not changing your old car, and the only time you two talked about anything regarding what happened, was about Robin. He wanted to know if Robin had asked anything, or if she was suspicious about how ‘Jeff’ ran out like that. 

She was, but she still believed it was Jeff. You only told her that he is very shy, not a person that normally has a booty call, so he doesn’t know how to act about it. That was that. Then Eddie had sent you like forty tiktoks, and you sent back sixty.

That was how it was all week, and you liked it, but you didn’t at the same time. On wednesday you had gotten… needy. Your eyes lingered on your bed more than one time as you contemplated messaging Eddie. You had paced and thought about it, but the more you did, the more you lost confidence on actually pressing send. One of you has to break the ice with it, after all, you did say you would contact eachother if needed.

Yet it didn’t happen.

You wondered if it was going to be not as usual as you thought it was going to be. He did say he wasn’t against your comment on being a recurrent fuck, but now you couldn’t help but doubt it. You didn’t want it to be something that happened once per month, not even once every two weeks. You were hoping at least one fuck with him per week, and hopefully to not become addicted to it the more it happened… Now that you’re thinking about it, maybe it was a good thing to not have a recurrent fuck.

Now friday, you had invited them all for a movie night, and your nerves were there, but it was more of an anticipation, of the hope that he might stay back. Argyle and Eden were not coming, and Jonathan had to work, so it was just you, Robin, Steve, Nance and Eddie. You had worn something comfortable yet, tried to make it catching. A buttoned blouse that was flowing with the first three buttons open, your cleavage showing, and then it was tucked in your pants. 

It was casual but not too obvious for your friends to question your clothing choice. You wondered if he was as nervous, or as expectating as you were about tonight. You hoped he was. You have been yearning it heavily for a few days already, burning from inside out as you tried touching yourself to the memory of him, but nothing could satiate you. Only Eddie Munson could, and his huge fucking di–

Your doorbell rang, making you stop fixing the bowls of snacks on your coffee table. You had prepared some nachos, dips, pringles and wine. Yeah, everything looked fine. You gave a nod of encouragement and walked towards the door, expecting to see Steve, Robin and Nancy, knowing Steve was driving them, but when you opened the door you found a singular person, and it was the one you wanted to see the most.

“Hi Sweetheart.” 

Your heart skipped a beat, and he looked so good, making you already want to clench over nothing, with your imagination running wild, more than a rollercoaster would. You saw his breathing hitch, and you could swear you saw his nostrils flare up slightly, his pupils becoming darker, but maybe it was your stupid brain making things up because– you were so hungry.

“Hi Eds.” You moved out of the way to let him in and he gave a nod and walked in, his eyes never leaving yours and– Oh… you knew. He knew. He wasn’t leaving tonight, wasn’t he? You could feel it. The tension as soon as he walked in, how the air became heavy, how his eyes looked all over you, staying over your open blouse more than they should have.

You felt his cologne invade your nostrils, your lungs, and already your entire apartment smelled like him. You closed the door as you felt your heart about to burst in your chest and probably make you bleed from the inside out. You were already burning in your core and you wanted to curse at him from the effects he was causing on you by just walking through the door. 

You two had been talking like you always did, but as soon as you two saw eachother it was as if you were not that kind of friends at all. Not that you were disliking it, it was just new. You heard how he walked further in your house, and the last time that he was here, he was in your room, barely dressed, and then you two were almost about to go at it again before getting completely interrupted.

You turned to face him, seeing him taking his leather jacket off, revealing a tight white shirt on his body, making your throat close up on you. He never wore white, and you never realized how good it looked on him because it contrasted against all of his tattoos on his arms. His hair was on a low bun, his beard neatly cut, and he was sideways to you, letting you inspect him all, from head to toes, and yet–

“Checking me out already? Let a man breathe.” You blinked as you felt heat rushing to your cheeks, embarrassment running you over as your eyes fixated on him again. He was smirking your way, biting his bottom lip to contain a laugh, his eyes gleaming with something you could not decipher.

“It was weird seeing you with a white shirt on, that’s all Munson.” He raised his eyebrows and looked down on himself, giving you a nod and then looking back up at you.

“Wanted to try something new.” You couldn’t help but believe he did it to catch your attention, and he had succeeded. You cleared your throat as you felt your belly turning, the nerves taking over you as you didn’t really know how to act now. Normally? Flirty? Expectantly?

“Right, um… I’ll go get the cork screw for the wine.” You turned from him and walked inside the kitchen, taking a deep breath and hoping that would calm you down. You had to calm down. He was Eddie, still the same Eddie who you hated for a whole year, and the one you became friends and also the one you fucked– You bit your bottom lip as you walked towards your drawers, opening the third one, looking for the cork screw.

You frowned when you couldn’t find it, rummaging through it. You closed it and went to open the second one. You cursed when you couldn’t see it at first glance, and you were sure you put it in the drawers. You closed that drawer and opened the very first one, finally spotting it. You hummed in approval and reached to move the utensils out of the way in order to grab it, and then you froze when you felt a presence behind you.

“Running away from me so early in the night, Peach?” You gulped as you felt hands glide over your hips, fingers pressing against them, making your breath stop for a second. 

“I wasn’t– I just forgot to put this on the table–” You were breathless in each word you spoke and he couldn’t help but grin in victory at that. He was making you feel nervous, yet not uncomfortable. He knows it, but he will not do anything you do not want to do, not wanting to trust his senses only.

“Mhm… Do you want me to back off?” Your face warmed at how considerate he was, despite you two already having stated you wanted eachother to keep doing this. He was being respectful to you, first and foremost. You could feel your inner thighs burn, your core tense at the need, and you let your body speak for you, your ass gently brushing against his front. You heard him choke on his breath, a small smirk appearing on your lips.

“No. Not really���” His hands gripped your hips and made you flush against him, pressing you harder, and you wanted to moan at the closeness, and at the rising bulge that was on the curve of your ass. 

“Playing with fire darling.” His fingers moved, slowly and tentatively to your front. You closed your eyes as you took a deep breath in, taking in his touches as your hands remained still inside your drawer, the cork screw forgotten.

“As if you didn't like it, Munson.” You heard him chuckle, closer than before, his breath hitting your right ear. A shiver ran down your spine, your eyes opening as goosebumps covered your arms, your belly in flames as you finally clenched around nothing. 

“I never said I didn’t, did I?” His voice was low, rough, and with a hint of smugness that you have started to like. It was seductive, and it was making you almost tremble with need, wanting that voice to be moaning your name already. He was growing harder the more he held your hips, slowly moving to your thighs, and he wanted to dig his fingertips in and press you even harder against him, slide his hands between your thighs and make a mess out of you in the lapse of minutes.

He licked his lips as he looked over your neck, your earlobe, your jaw and he wanted to mark it more than anything else. Maybe he can have a taste, can’t he? He can smell your perfume, driving his mind insane, his bulge twitch even more than before, and this is going to be a problem, because he can’t help his mouth coming closer to your neck, and he knows he is going to grow even harder the moment he tastes you again.

You were holding your breath as you felt the hot air hitting your skin, your head tilting to the other side, unconsciously so, but yet it was a green light for him to do whatever he wanted. You are out of your mind, because your friends are about to arrive, and Eddie’s lips are already brushing against your pulse point and–

RING.

He groaned, or growled, loudly, his forehead falling to your shoulder in defeat as you whined in protest. Interrupted by the same thing once again. You should have just messaged Eddie for tonight. You shouldn’t have done this whole charade in order to see him again, and now you regretted telling your friends anything at all. You were being mean but… but fuck, you were so close to him and now you can’t help but feel even more desperate than before.

“Fuck…” He cursed with a sigh and you weren’t going to miss this chance. You weren’t going to let him leave tonight.

“We can continue this later…?” You asked and his head perked up from your shoulder, and you turned your head to look at him, your noses touching as your breaths mixed together in between the two of you. Your eyes were going up and down, his eyes, his lips, his eyes, his lips. You saw him slowly nod as his eyes were transfixed on your own lips, his mouth slightly open and you felt excitement bubble up inside of you, letting out a shaky breath out. 

He was leaning in, and he was so close, his plush lips brushing against yours only for the doorbell to ring again and for him to growl loudly, pulling away from you, his touch completely leaving you.

“I need to go to the bathroom because–” You blinked at his words and he pointed to his pants and your eyes followed his signal and–

“Oh.” You snorted and he glared at you at how cocky you were, knowing you had done this to him. He had a very noticeable bulge, not tented, but you couldn’t miss it.

“Yeah, you’re gonna pay for doing this when you knew people were coming over.” You rolled your eyes as you grabbed the corkscrew and closed the drawer, walking out of the kitchen with him following right behind you. 

“Sure, whatever you say.” He gave you a warning look before heading to your bathroom. You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding and put a hand on your chest. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. You were putty in his hands and you didn’t notice how he made your knees tremble. Was he always this hot and you didn’t notice it? Did you dislike him so much you couldn’t see past it?

You couldn’t help but feel like you were missing out for a long time.

Knocks on the door interrupted your thought process, gasping as you remembered your friends, rushing to open the door for them. Steve, Nancy and Robin stood before you, Steve with a bottle of wine in his hand and a roll of his eyes.

“What took you so long?” He walked past you, followed by the two girls who were holding hands. 

“She was probably talking with Jeff.” Robin snickers, making you flush as you close the door, holding up the corkscrew to them.

“No, I was looking for this and Robin, can you stop making a big deal out of sex?” She rolled her eyes at you, taking the corkscrew out of your hands and moving to sit on the couch, grabbing your bottle of wine first to start opening it.

“Oh please, same hook up in the lapse of a week? Sounds serious to me.” You sighed and scoffed at that, though she was right. Your hookups were never the same. It was a person one week, another the next, never the same one two times in a row. Last time that happened, you started a relationship. 

Panic set in at that. No, that’s not happening. Not with Eddie, right? You don’t like him like that. Well, you didn’t like Billy like that either and you dated him later on because feelings developed without your will and– Fuck. No, you are thinking too much about this. You have to stop before your mind explodes and makes everything awkward. 

You heard the door of the bathroom open and everyone looked to see Eddie walking out, wiping his hands away, stopping in his tracks when he felt the eyes on him, a confused look on his face. 

“What?” The rest shrugged, paying it no mind and you had to hold in the sigh of relief of people simply not caring if he got here early. Good. You looked at Eddie with a side glance and he reciprocated it with a small nod, walking towards the couch to sit down next to Robin. “You need help Buckley?”

You saw how he helped Robin unscrew the bottle open, putting the bottle in between his thighs to pull the cork off, his bicep tightening as his face contorted with the strength he was putting in. You felt your center clench out of nowhere, heat radiating from your fingertips and you had to do something to take your mind away from him. You can’t believe you are getting hot and bothered by him opening a wine bottle. 

“So, what are we watching?” Steve asked as he sat down on the arm chair, moving his upper body to take a chip and dip it in the homemade guacamole you made. You saw how Nancy plopped on the floor, next to Robin’s legs, reaching over to grab a chip herself and just eat it like that. 

The remaining seat was on the edge, right next to Eddie. 

He was in the middle of the couch, giving the bottle back to Robin as you walked over to sit next to him, trying to calm your nerves now, feeling a little guilty. You are here with all your friends, fucking one of them, but the rest not knowing about it and will never know. You felt bad for Robin the most, but you honestly did not want to make a big deal about this, knowing it was just a physical relationship. You knew that they would either not like it and try to pry the two of you apart or… the opposite and you were not sure that could ever happen with Eddie.

“I want to watch Terrifier 3. It’s already in the streaming app.” Nancy mentions with her mouth full of chips as she caresses Robin’s calf. The strawberry haired girl was chugging the wine from her glass, probably out of nerves. After all this time, Robin still got nervous around her girlfriend. It was endearing.

“A scary movie?” You ask, already feeling a bit fidgety at the prospect of it, not being good with horror movies. Eddie was serving himself a glass of wine, a smirk on his lips as he looked at the pour.

“Don’t worry Peach, I’ll protect you from the evil clown.” You glared at him as Steve chuckled, shaking his head. For some reason, you started remembering the last time you two had talked about a scary movie together was… when you had hurt him calling him a freak. A weird person. When they went to see Evil Dead without you. He had accused you of being a scaredy cat, and you had gotten defensive about it and now…

“I’ll sacrifice you to save myself.” You joke, knowing damn well you would never do that. He chuckles, looking at you with a look only the two of you understand. An endearing one, caring, yet filled with fire behind the irises.

“You hurt me, baby.” Your eyes slightly widened at the pet name, hoping no one would think weird of it, also looking at him in warning to be careful with his words in front of your friends.

“Don’t fight you two.” Nancy giggles mockingly, and you see Eddie turning his head to laugh with her, and you just sit there perplexed at how no one suspects a thing. It means you two were never put together, in any way, by no one in the group.

“She’s the one who said was sacrificing me to a murderous clown to save herself!” He exclaims and that makes you roll your eyes, grabbing a chip and dipping it into the sour cream.

“I never said you were dying, Munson.” The chip went into your mouth as he looked back at you, and a drop of cream was on the corner of your lips. You wiped it off with your thumb, your tongue coming out to lick it, making sure you were taking everything into your mouth. You heard a low grumble on your left, and you turned your head to see Eddie glaring at you, his jaw tense, and you were confused, looking around to see if something happened.

“Don’t play fucking dumb.” He whispered as the other three talked and browsed to get the movie on your TV. You blinked, confused at his words, but then– You looked at your thumb and then you couldn’t help but snort, catching Steve’s attention.

“What’s funny?” You cleared your throat and shook your head.

“Nothing, just something I remembered.” Eddie was still glaring at you, his insides burning as he tried to take his mind somewhere else, and try to avoid thinking about your tongue around his dick. He turned to the TV screen, crossing his arms as he huffed. You were riling him up without you knowing, a fluttering happening in the pit of your stomach knowing he was looking at you no matter what.

Your heart dropped though once you saw the intro for the horror movie coming up and you looked to your side to grab onto your blanket. It doesn’t matter if it was hot or not, but the blanket brought you comfort, and it made you feel a little bit safer. Everytime you watched horror or sad movies, you put a blanket on you, and this time was no different, placing it on top of your legs.

Nancy shot up from the floor to rush and turn off the lights, a soft chattering happening between the group as the movie started playing and she returned to sit on Robin’s lap as she cuddled up to her. You wished you could do that right now, wanting to feel secure against someone again as you watched these things, just like when you were with– Before dark clouds possessed you, you grabbed some chips and pooled them on your palm so you could eat them as the movie played.

You felt your heart beating faster than usual, afraid a jumpscare would happen sooner or later, and you definitely did not like the creepy smile this clown had. You were squinting, trying to avoid seeing most of the scenes, and then you felt your blanket moving, making you jump and look at Eddie.

“Just wanted some of this.” He moved the blanket so he could now place part of it over his own lap, sharing it with you. For some reason you felt like this was his way of making you feel safer, knowing you weren’t good with this kind of film. He could sense how uncomfortable you were, and he couldn’t help but feel bad for you. His mind went to the same memory you had of a year ago, and he now could see you just didn’t want to be left out, despite you having these kinds of reactions to movies like these.

But he couldn’t wrap his arm around you. Even if everyone accepted your relationship as friends, he didn’t know just how weird it would look to them if he did something like that. He flinched when you yourself jumped at a very small jumpscare, and Steve turned his head to look at you, remote in his hand.

“Hey, do you want to watch something else?” Your heart warmed at how he cared but you still shook your head at that, a nervous smile spreading on your lips.

“It’s just a movie, don’t worry.” He gave a nod and put the remote back down, moving his body to lay on the armchair sideways, head on an arm rest while his legs and feet dangled over the other. You could feel Eddie’s gaze on you and you turned to look at him as well. He gave a raise of eyebrows at you, a silent question if you were okay. You gave him a nod and sighed softly, your eyes returning to the screen in front of you.

The minutes went by and you noticed the movie had… gore. Too much gore in it. It wasn’t even the jumpscares that got you anymore, it was the anxious feeling of what he might do to the protagonists. Steve, Robin and Nancy were softly talking about the effects of the movie, while you were just trying to look away from the screen as much as you could because, fuck that. You didn’t care this was strawberry syrup or whatever the fuck the other three were saying, you didn’t like it.

Suddenly, you felt something creeping over your thigh and under the blanket. You flinched, thinking it was a bug, only to feel a strong grip of fingers digging into you. Your breathing stopped as you gave Eddie a quick warning glance and the bastard was eating a chip with his other hand, his eyes still trained to the screen. Your heart was beating in your throat as you felt nervousness invade you, afraid the others would notice it at all, but as you gave a subtle glance their way, their eyes were trained to the screen, still immersed in the conversation.

You weren’t even listening to them, the movie now just a background picture and noise as you stared forward, and his fingers rubbed your thigh in soft and slow circles. You felt shivers run down your entire body, electricity coursing through your veins and arteries as you tried to control your breathing, feeling it start to become quicker.

What was he doing? Why? You two were in front of everyone, and he is just touching you like this and hope they never look your way? Okay, it was nothing bad, he was just rubbing your thigh, that was all. He was just trying to distract you from the screen that was showing off great amounts of blood and guts, but you didn’t even try to comprehend why or how that happened. Maybe that was his intention, and that made you slowly relax. You have to remember Eddie is your friend, first and foremost, so it’s probably him being that friend for you right now.

But as soon as you were beginning to relax, you felt those fingers move slowly, creeping towards the inner part of your thighs. You held a breath in, the situation becoming even more dangerous than before because– You’re getting worked up. The idea of your friends being here, not knowing what had transpired between the two of you, and now sneaking touches between eachother without them finding out was… exciting.

Your legs were parted, just very little, but it was enough for him to get his fingers in between, and press against your inner thigh, making you choke a bit on your breath, but playing it off as a cough. You heard him chuckle under his breath and your head snapped to glare at him and he was already side-eying you, a cheeky smile on his lips. 

You clenched your thighs together, trapping his fingers in. You were feeling like you had to compete against him, to make him be as worked up as you were right now. He tried wiggling his fingers between your thighs but you kept him locked in there. He wasn’t complaining about it, feeling the warmth of your legs around his fingers, and he could pretend that was the same temperature as the warmth he could feel inside of you. 

But he wasn’t prepared when you moved your own hand this time, and without wasting a minute, you placed it between his parted legs, your fingers digging into his inner thigh, cutting his breath short. He was trying to keep his eyes on the screen, glancing towards his other friends just in case they moved or looked your way and his, but as soon as he looked away from you, he felt your entire palm rub against him, over his pants. He twitched, and your hand rapidly backed away as your thighs let his hand go as well and he put it back on his side.

Nancy looked over Robin’s head to talk to Eddie, “You scared Eddie?” She giggled and you snorted again, taking a chip into your mouth as Eddie felt himself burning inside out, his words coming out from gritted teeth.

“No, just had a twitch.” Oh you were going to get it after this. His fingers tingle with the need to touch you again, to keep his hand over your warm body, to pull you close and kiss you senseless to the point you couldn’t breathe anymore. He wanted to render you stupid, speechless, babbling nonsense to him and he wouldn’t be able to help himself and smile at you. 

He’s going to make sure to see that after everyone is gone.

The rest of the movie was spent in silence, and no more hand touches. You rubbed your thigh against his every now and then, to keep you distracted from the movie, or to rile him up, you didn’t know, maybe both. You were growing impatient with each minute that passed from the movie, needing to be alone with him once and for all, so when the credits started rolling up, you were so glad to the point you could sigh of relief.

“That wasn’t so bad.” Robin says as she finishes her glass of wine and Nancy gets off her lap to stand up and stretch. You clear your throat and take the blanket off your lap and Eddie’s, throwing it next to the couch and into the basket.

“I don’t know, but I ain’t watching something like that again.” You comment, leaning back on your couch as if exhausted from having to endure that film, but in all honesty, you were sighing of finally getting what you want after two excruciating hours. 

“Hey, Eds?” Steve calls out to him, and Eddie didn’t realize he was looking at the expanse of your neck, and his head snapped to look at his best friend, trying to play it off as if he had zoned out.

“Yeah?” 

“Can you take Nance and Robs back home? I need to go help Jon at the bar because one of the waiters had to leave early and he needs help closing.” 

And you felt your whole body freeze over as well as Eddie’s. Your fucking plans were ruined. He was going to leave, or maybe he could return? Or maybe he didn’t want to drive twenty minutes to leave the girls and then twenty minutes back. This was not fair.

Eddie wasn’t far behind at your thoughts, but he was being more explicit. He was cursing at everything and everyone, wanting to make up an excuse in order to stay but he knows there’s no way out of this, Nancy and Robin smiling innocently at him, batting their eyelashes so he wouldn’t be mad at them. He sighed, giving a slow nod and your body slumped in defeat. 

“Yeah, sure. You girls want to go already?” He asks, and you feel your stomach turn with disappointment, knowing you are going to be met with your pink vibrating friend in your bed instead of the actual thing you want. 

“Please? I want to go straight to bed.” Robin says as she gets up, a little wobbly thanks to the wine, and you follow right behind her, stacking the empty small bowls of snacks on the coffee table as they get ready to head out again. You turn your head over your shoulder to see Eddie looking at you with a frown in his eyebrows, and you give him a small shrug as if telling him ‘it can’t be helped’.

You wished it could be. You wished he could stay tonight, but you guess you can wait tomorrow? Or maybe he will be busy tomorrow too? You can definitely message him and ask, you just have to wait a whole 24 hours to actually know that answer. You didn’t want to wait that long. You should have fucking told him to come an hour early than all the others so you could at least have a quickie in your kitchen counter.

You wanted to groan when you felt a bit of heat in your underwear, your wetness becoming present as your imagination ran wild. You didn’t notice the man that was next to you, staring at you as if he was going to murder you, or eat you, or simply destroy you. His chest was moving a little quicker than before, signaling the sudden increase of pace of his breathing.

“Let’s go, I want to fucking sleep until next year.” You heard Nancy say and you looked towards Eddie, a frown in his face as he stared at you already. You fought off the disappointment and gave him a small shrug. It can’t be helped. It will have to be postponed to another day. You will have to hold your hunger for one more day, or a few more, and maybe you shouldn’t have to if you had messaged him two days ago.

He gave an exasperated sigh, and he held back the angry groan he wanted to let out. You walked towards the front door, opening it as Steve gave you a nod in thanks for hosting tonight as he walked out, followed by Robin, Nancy and lastly Eddie. You two held the gaze as he stepped by you, and time went slower as you felt your ears ringing, a ring that was yelling at you to somehow make him stay, but– it was too obvious if you did.

He sent a small smile your way and then time began its normal pace once again. You didn’t know you were holding a breath until you actually let it out. You popped your head out as you saw them all heading towards the elevator, waving at them one last time. Eddie raised his hand in a quick moment in response and Robin blew a kiss your way. You gave a small smile in return before hearing the elevator ding and you closed the door, a defeated sigh leaving your lips.

You felt wrong for thinking only about getting railed when most of your friends were here to have fun, to watch a movie with you, to spend time with you, and the only thing you could think of was the one person that was sitting next to you throughout the whole film. You turned towards the coffee table, walking towards it to continue cleaning only to see a pair of keys sitting next to Eddie’s glass. Your eyes widened when you saw they were his car keys, grabbing them quickly, and cursing under your breath.

“This fucking idiot!” You put your phone in the back pocket of your pants and you rushed towards your front door, opening it so you could run out to try to catch them, but you stopped on your tracks when you saw Eddie standing in front of your home. Your eyes widened as your heart stopped for a second, watching him breathing heavily. “You– You forgot–”

You couldn’t finish the sentence. His right hand grabbed onto the back of your neck while the left one held your waist, pulling you inside your apartment again and quickly turning you and slamming you against the wall next to your door, his lips clashing onto yours in a hurried manner, rough, needy and desperate.

You didn’t waste a fucking second, dropping his keys to the floor and your hands immediately clung to the back of his neck to press him more into you as you both moved your lips against eachother as if you had never tasted one another, or as if you were relapsing into a drug you were once addicted to. His tongue slipped past your lips in an instant, clashing with yours and you let him ravish you just how you wanted him to do for a week now. The hand on your waist was gripping you tightly, his hips pressing against your own and you let a groan enter his mouth which he responded with a low moan.

His hand moved from your waist towards your back in order to cup your ass, and you instinctively moved your right leg over his hip, letting him press himself right against your core. You moaned into the kiss, and he could only groan as the smacking of lips filled the room entirely. His hand went from your ass to holding your thigh against him, his pants growing tighter at each roll of the hips he does into you. The seam of your pants making the friction on your clit be simply murderous. 

His tongue danced with yours, devouring every inch and space that there could possibly be. You felt your body burning, your fingertips felt like they had embers, just sending shockwaves all over your spine. Your belly was filled with adrenaline and excitement, but it was cut short when rationality struck you for a second, making you reluctantly pull away, leaving you both breathless as he held your thigh, giving it a soft squeeze before you spoke again.

“You left your keys–”

“Yeah, I know. I did it on purpose. It was my excuse to come back here.” He gave you a soft peck on the lips before continuing. “I made them head down while I picked the keys up again.” 

You felt your heart bursting, biting your bottom lip as you looked at him, your hands still clinging to the back of his head as if your life depended on it. You didn’t want to let him go, but, by what he was saying, it seems this had to be cut short. He slowly put your leg back down, not before giving it a squeeze and then let it rest on your hip. His other hand went from the back of your neck to put his curled index finger under your chin to keep your eyes on him.

“So… you have to go?” Your eyes went to his lips and back up and back to his lips again. His breath was mixing with yours as you two remained with slightly open mouths, soft pants leaving you. He gave you a nod, a serious look in his eyes as he replied.

“I’ll take them home and come back here… do you want that?” Your thighs clenched together, your core pulsating with the prospect of him returning to you. You desperately nodded at him, pulling him down for another kiss, not understanding how you were so reluctant to not be with him just a week ago before you exploded, and now you are declaring Eddie Munson as your new favorite drug, your favorite beverage, a perfect addiction. You pulled away, but not before giving a soft bite and tug on his bottom lip, making him growl in need at you.

“Yeah… I’ll wait for you.” His hands quickly cradled your face, giving you one strong last kiss. Well, that is until he returns from dropping Robin and Nancy. He pulled away from you, giving a nod as he let go of your face and your hands dropped from holding him.

“I’ll do record time–” He bent down to pick his keys on the floor and raised himself back up, fixing himself in his pants and you salivated as you saw the prominent bulge that developed on him. “So be ready for when I come back, Peach. Don’t think I forgot how much you teased me today.” 

With that, he walked right back out of your apartment and you heard the boots walking away in your hallway and you just stood there, breathing heavily as his words processed in your brain. He would come back here and your body shook with the anticipation of what he might do to you after that small threat he gave you. You heard the elevator ding and you know he is finally going down again, your feet finally working to close the door of your apartment. 

You stared at the door and all the guilt and shame you felt before was out of the window. The only things that remained were adrenaline and excitement, your body moving, rushing towards your room to make sure everything was tidy just as you had prepared. The black lace underneath your clothes waiting to surprise him as soon as he takes the garments off. Or maybe… you can wait for him in just that. You bit your bottom lip as you started taking your blouse off, followed by your sneakers and then your pants, looking at the full body mirror in your room.

You wanted to be filthy. You wanted to be rough. For some reason, you wanted to make him remember you. Make him remember the woman that waited for him in just her lace, ready for him. The woman who could, in his words, take him all. You still don’t know why he always repeats it, but he does, and if he was being honest or not, or if they were meaningless words or not, you didn’t know, but you’ll take the compliment. You wanted him to remember you because you wanted to engrave himself in his mind. Maybe it was ego, maybe it was dignity, maybe it was you trying to show off thanks to how snarky he had been with you for a whole year.

Whatever the reason was. 

You wanted to ruin Eddie Munson.

end of chapter 19

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[not-poignant]

Underline the Blue (Nate/Janusz - Omegaverse)

Title: Underline the Blue

Pairing: Nate Prince/Janusz Bodanowicz

Notes: This is another story in the Underline the Black universe! Set prior to Underline the Black.

Summary: Nate, an omega, has been sent to Hillview by his alpha partner who doesn’t believe he’s good enough to claim or bond with, and wants him trained up at an omega rehabilitation facility to be a better partner. Nate is paired up with the alpha Janusz, who soon realises Nate has been micromanaged and ‘trained’ already to the point of having his soul shattered, and a journey of slow recovery and rehabilitation begins.

Underline the Blue - Chapter 18 - on AO3!

In which Janusz takes Nate out for a drive, and then to a restaurant, and Nate reveals he’s too scared to go in because he doesn’t believe he’s good enough to be allowed to eat in public.

Underline the Blue (early access) - Chapter 20 @ Patreon || Ream

In which Janusz confronts Nate for implying that he’s weak, and they unpack the idea of what it means for an alpha to be weak. While Nate’s scared of a conversation like this, Janusz is excited to finally be getting beneath the fear into Nate’s deep-seated anger at the world.

Early access chapters are released in the Augus & Gwyn tiers and higher on both Patreon and Ream. :D (Folks are only charged once a month on Ream, hence the slightly higher fee - that and I set my tier prices 10 years ago and cost of living has gone up a little since then! T.T)

– Thanks to all the Patreon and Ream supporters for making this (and my other writing) possible!

[hungermakesmonsters]

Devotion & Desire

Chapter Two

Plot summary : When you, a lone omega, move in across the hall from alpha Bucky Barnes, he knows that his life is about to get a lot more complicated, but he has no idea just how much you’re going to turn his life upside down. You’re both devoted to fixing your past mistakes, but will desire for something more get the better of you?

Pairing : Alpha!Bucky Barnes x Omega!Reader

Story Rating : R 

Warnings : [This is a fic for 18+ only, minors DNI] This chapter contains violence. All chapters will contain the usual omegaverse and A/B/O tropes, and explicit smut. Please check the warnings on each chapter if you choose to follow this story. 

Word Count : 5.9k

A/N : 😅😅😅

CHAPTER ONE

MASTER LIST

Chapter Two

It had been going so well.

Too well, really. 

So well, that you really should have known that it was all going to go to shit.

You cursed under your breath as you limped away, sporadically glancing over your shoulder, making sure you weren’t being followed. It was paranoia mostly - you knew Bucky had more sense than to try and follow you out in the open. And it wasn’t as if you didn’t garner enough attention on your own, making your way past groups of people heading home after a night out on the town, looking every bit the poor, helpless and pathetic little omega as you limped alone.

You hated it and you hated yourself for letting it happen.

It had been sloppy, careless. Hindsight was a bitch and had no problem telling you everything you’d done wrong; you should have waited, you should have taken your time.

But that was the problem. You hadn’t wanted to wait. You hadn’t wanted to spend another moment with him like that; touching him, kissing him, and doing every other unmentionable thing. As you walked, you scrubbed your cheek with your sleeve, trying to get his scent off you, but it felt like it was everywhere, like it was seeping into your pores, into your very being, and you’d never be rid of it.

The only thing you knew for certain was that Bucky Barnes was supposed to be dead and you were going to have to find a way to fix your mistake.

Though first you’d need to deal with the world of shit you’d found yourself in. Everything you owned was back at your apartment and Bucky wasn’t an idiot, he wasn’t just going to sit back and forget that you’d tried to kill him. No, he was probably already trying to figure out who you were and why you wanted him dead.

Your weeks of hard work in getting close to him had gone down the drain and all the pathetic, degrading things you’d done had been rendered pointless.

It was playing over and over again in your head, every little thing you’d done and how you could have done better.

You’d played the part of the meek little omega, you’d made him want to protect you. That night in his apartment you’d spread your scent all over his bathroom in the hope of driving him crazy, getting in his head and making it so that you were all he could think about. And, then he’d started seeking you out; offering to walk you too and from work, and agreeing to come to the bar with you.

It had all been perfect.

He should be dead.

What had gone wrong?

You were so caught up in your own frustration that you didn’t hear the call at first, someone shouting your name from down the street. Looking up, you noticed Nikki and Jade, finally on their way home, heading straight towards you.

“What happened?” Nikki asked, looking you up and down, voice filled with concern.

“Didn’t you leave with Bucky?” Jade added a second later.

You took a breath, mind racing as you tried to come up with the perfect lie. Then your gaze dropped and you slipped back into the role of the helpless, delicate omega.

“I think I left my purse at the bar,” you said softly, not looking at either of them.

“You could have called us, we would’ve gone back for it,” Nikki told you.

“Did you tell Bucky? Did he not offer to walk you back to the bar?” Jade asked.

“No, he - we -” you swallowed awkwardly and paused for effect before daring to glance up.

“What’s wrong?” Nikki asked. “Did he -”

“No - no, Bucky didn’t do anything,” you quickly explained. “It was me, I - I tried to kiss him..”

The both fell into a stunned silence while you dropped your gaze again, looking thoroughly embarrassed. And, in a way, you were embarrassed, just not in the way that they thought.

“What did he do? If he was mean -” Nikki sounded ready to fight, and that was the last thing you needed.

“No, he was nice, really. I just - I feel so stupid for thinking he could like me like that...” you sighed, glancing up for a split-second to see if they were buying the lie. They were. “I needed some space so I came out for a walk. I don't want to go back to my apartment in case he sees and wants to talk about it, and then I tripped and hurt my ankle...”

“So, your purse...” Jade prompted softly.

You shook your head, indicating that you hadn’t left it, that you were just using it as an excuse to stay away from your apartment and, by extension, Bucky. For effect, you gave a little sniffle.

“Oh, mouse,” Nikki said with a shake of her head. “I’m sure it’s not that bad. I bet if you just talk to Bucky you’ll be able to sort it out.”

“I can’t. Not tonight,” you told her. “You didn’t see his face... it was so embarrassing.”

“Do you want to crash on our sofa tonight?” Jade offered.

You gave a weak little nod but stayed silent, quickly forming a plan. Their apartment was a couple of floors below yours but it was connected by the same fire escape. You’d be able to sneak back into your apartment in the morning, grab your stuff and get the hell out of there before Bucky could catch up to you.

The three of you walked back slowly, Jade putting her arm around your waist and helping you limp along on your injured ankle. Neither of them said anything, but you’d catch the way they were looking at you from the corner of your eye and it made your stomach turn.

Eventually you ended up in their apartment, set up on the sofa for the night, but you didn’t sleep; how could you when you knew he was upstairs and when you couldn’t trust that Nikki and Jade wouldn’t try to go talk to him on your behalf? Fortunately, the night passed without incident and, in the morning, you caught sight of Bucky leaving from the window. Your eyes followed him to his motorcycle, watching as he finished a phone call before riding off.

You didn’t have to hear his conversation to know that he was looking for you; he’d probably been up half the night trying to track you down, without once stopping to think that you’d be dumb enough to still be in the building.

You made your excuses to Nikki and Jade, and headed back upstairs.

Bucky had shut your apartment door, but the lock was busted. Fortunately, you weren’t planning on sticking around long enough to get your security deposit back. It didn’t look like anything had been taken, but a few drawers had been opened, obviously he’d spent some time in there, looking for clues. But you already knew he wouldn’t have found anything. It wasn’t like you’d kept a journal detailing how you wanted to kill your neighbour.

Luckily, the latch on the door was still intact and held the door shut well enough for you to dare to risk a quick shower, needing to scrub yourself to try and get rid of the last of his scent that you hadn’t been able to wash off the night before. Then you changed into some clean clothes and set about trying to pack a bag so you could get the hell out of there.

It was shocking just how much you’d settled into the apartment in the few months you’d been there, and you almost felt sad knowing you were leaving it. Aside from the act you’d had to put on for everyone around you, you realised that you’d actually liked it there; you’d found a comfort and sense of safety that you’d never had before.

Lost in the strange feeling, you almost didn’t notice the door rattling until someone forced their way inside, breaking the latch and the last thing holding the door shut.

Turning you expected to see him standing there, angry and ready to demand an explanation. 

But it wasn’t Bucky.

There were two of them, and you could only guess what they wanted, but you didn’t bother wasting time asking. Instead you dropped behind the sofa.

You pulled the knife from your boot and threw it, catching one of your attackers in the shoulder, causing him to stagger back and let out a string of curses. There was a moment of confusion, but they quickly realised where you were. Scrambling out of your hiding place, you tried to race for your nightstand and the gun that was hidden in the top drawer, but your injured ankle slowed you down. Before you got there, a large hand grabbed your collar and a fistful of your hair, yanking you backwards so hard that you fell.

A boot connected with your stomach, knocking the wind from you, but it didn’t stop you from grabbing the leg attached to that boot and biting down as hard as you could, earning a pained yelp from your attacker. A second later, you were scrambling towards the door, desperate to get out. Then came another kick and, this time, instead of pulling away, he pressed his boot down on your back, holding you in place.

You heard the click of a gun’s safety and held your breath, waiting for the inevitable.

“Hey, jackass, Rumlow wants her alive,” said the other and your stomach almost turned itself inside out at the sound of a name you hadn’t heard in five years.

“I’m not gonna kill her, just gonna put one in the back of her leg to keep her from running,” came the response.

Immediately, you started to struggle, cursing and swearing as he pressed down harder on your back and laughed. You were trapped and powerless to defend yourself; you were everything you’d never wanted to be again, and the realisation had you thrashing and struggling in vain.

“What’s he want with a scrawny little omega like this anyway?”

Somehow, you managed to crawl a few inches despite the weight on your back, managing to get yourself ever so slightly closer to the nightstand, refusing to give up, refusing to resign yourself to your fate.

“I dunno,” the other goon answered, looking down at you, “she’s a feisty little thing though.”

You twisted and squirmed, trying to reach behind you to pull the boot from your back, still fighting, even though you knew there was no real chance of escape. Each breath you took was an awkward gasp, panic plus the pressure on your chest was making it harder and harder to breathe. And it only got worse when your vision started to blur.

But, before you could pass out, you felt something against your neck, then you were zapped with about a thousand volts. The pain only lasted a couple of seconds before you lost consciousness.

------------

In a way, Bucky knew that he should have seen it coming, that you (or any one really) wanting to be close to him should only ever have been seen as a massive red flag. In retrospect, it was easy to see how he’d fallen for it, how he’d let you play him and get close enough to almost take his life. 

And Bucky was angry, he was pissed that he’d let you get close, that he’d allowed himself to want for the first time in years.

He wanted to follow you as you ran, consequences be damned. He wanted to know why, wanted to know how your lies could make him feel a longing ache in the cave of his chest, an ache that hadn’t lessened even after your betrayal. 

For hours he looked through your apartment, trying to find some sign of who you were and why you wanted him dead, but there was nothing. He made call after call, upsetting almost everyone he knew by disturbing them at such a late hour. All he managed to find out was what he’d already suspected; the name you’d given him was fake, and so was every little scrap of your past that you’d shared.

There was no trace of you, like your entire life had been a lie, like you’d never even been a real person.

He began to wonder if you’d been trained somewhere like the Red Room, or been part of the Winter Soldier program, but none of that made sense. While you were clever enough to get close to him, it was obvious from your scuffle that you had no training, that you weren’t a fighter or a trained assassin. 

By the time morning came around, there was only one person left that Bucky hadn’t asked for help.

And, with great reluctance, he went to see Sam.

There was an awkwardness to the way he stood there in Sam’s home, half looking at him, the person he considered to be his only friend, and only in the loosest sense of the word. He didn’t want to explain himself or the maelstrom of emotions that he was trying to fight back. All he wanted was help finding you.

“I need your help tracking someone down,” he said, pulling up a photo he’d taken of the group on his phone last night, zooming in on your face. “I have a name, but I don’t think it’s real. The picture’s all I have to go on.”

Sam looked at the picture then looked at Bucky

“You know, when a woman doesn’t tell you her real name during a hook-up, it’s usually a sign she’s not interested in a relationship,” Sam joked with an easy sort of smile that Bucky had always been jealous of.

“It’s not like that,” Bucky answered, snatching back his phone. “She tried to kill me.”

“You do have that effect on people.”

“And this is why you’re the last person I came to for help,” Bucky responded,  taking a step back, about ready to give up leave.

“I see that cyborg brain of yours still doesn’t know how to process humour.”

“It can process humour just fine, it’s that you’re not funny,” Bucky snapped, his tone more than enough to tell his friend that he was already wearing on his last nerve. This was important to him and he wasn’t in the mood to play games. “If you’re not gonna help -”

“Alright, alright,” Sam held his hands up, signalling his surrender, “send me the photo and I’ll pass it on to Torres and see if he can find anything. In the meantime, why don’t you tell me exactly what happened?”

Bucky did as he was asked, sending the picture of Sam and then watching as Sam sent it on. Then there was a pause, Bucky obviously hesitating before he started to explain what had happened, in a tasteful and censored way. He told Sam how you’d moved in and how he’d tried to help you, how he’d tried to be a good alpha, and how the pair of you had started to get close.

“Any idea why she tried to kill you?” Sam dared to ask, even though he seemed to sense that it was something of a sensitive subject for Bucky. 

“No, she didn’t exactly stick around to explain it after trying to stab me.”

Sam gave him a look that had Bucky bristling, looking about ready to fight if Sam even thought about making another joke.

“Do you think someone paid her?” Sam said, looking at your picture again.

“No... it felt personal. She was really angry...” Bucky said, barely managing to hold back a sigh. “But she didn’t fight like she had any training and she’s an omega, so it’s not like she stood a chance at overpowering me..”

“She must’ve put on quite the act if she managed to get that close to you.” Again Bucky bristled, discomfort on his face betraying him. But if Sam noticed, thankfully, he decided not to say anything about it. “Why does it feel like there’s more than your wounded pride at stake here?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Bucky shrugged. “I just want to know why she tried to kill me and if she’s gonna try again.”

Sam was about to say something when his phone buzzed with a message. 

“Torres says it might take him a couple of hours.”

“Can you let me know what he finds?” Bucky asked.

“Sure. Where are you going?”

“Home. In case she goes back to her apartment.”

“You really think she’ll go back?”

“I don’t think she planned for failure,” Bucky offered, “I think she saw the opportunity and took it, now she’s out there with nothing but the clothes on her back.”

“Need me to come with?”

Bucky shook his head. “No, if she shows up I can deal with her.”

The pair shared an awkward goodbye and Bucky headed back to the apartment building, hoping that he hadn’t missed you, but not entirely sure what he’d do if you did turn up. He told himself that he just wanted answers, but it was more than that; he wanted to understand, he wanted to know why you’d gone to such great lengths.

A van peeled past him as he reached the building and he quickly noticed Nikki on the sidewalk, blood pouring from her nose, her eyes fixed on the van until she noticed Bucky.

“What happened?” Bucky asked, quickly moving to her, trying to make sure she was alright.

“They took her,” she answered, frantic. “Someone took mouse.”

“What?” He glanced down the street at the van.

“They had guns, Bucky. I think they’re gonna - oh my god...” she let out an awkward sob, her hand lifting to cover her mouth as she struggled not to fall apart. 

“It’s okay. It’s gonna be okay,” Bucky told her, placing a hand on her shoulder and trying to comfort her. 

“She was bleeding, Bucky. They’re gonna hurt her,” she continued. “I tried to stop them, but I -”

For a split second, he was torn - torn between staying and looking after Nikki and going after you - but his indecision didn’t last long. Whatever was going on, he wasn’t going to let anyone hurt you. He needed answers, he needed to know what was going on.

“Go inside,” he told her, starting back towards his motorcycle, “I’m going to get her back.”

Bucky didn’t wait for a response before starting the engine and taking off after the van.

He easily managed to catch up with the van in the city traffic, pulling up alongside it. He couldn’t see you, but he could hear something, someone, in the back of the van, struggling and kicking against the door. Whatever was going on, Bucky knew he wasn’t going to get any answers if he couldn’t get to you. Hearing your screams and shouts was the last straw; no matter who you really were or what you’d done, you didn’t deserve this.

Slamming his vibranium arm into the passenger door, he tore it off the van, quickly pulling one of your kidnappers out and tossing him into the street, causing the car behind to swerve wildly. In the commotion, the driver fumbled for his gun, giving Bucky ample time to climb into the van and slam his fist into the guy’s jaw. His head rebounded off the window, and the van turned sharply, slamming into a streetlight.

The collision was enough to knock the driver out.

Bucky climbed out of the van, practically tearing the back door off as he pulled it open, find you bloody and sprawled unconscious on the floor. He quickly dialled Sam.

“Hey, Sam, do you still have that safehouse downtown?”

------------

You woke up in a small, mostly unfurnished bedroom with no memory of how you’d gotten there; you could remember waking up in the back of the van, kicking and screaming, trying to get out but, then, nothing. But that blank spot in your memory was really the least of your concerns.

When you moved, everything ached. Someone had cleaned you up and bandaged your wounds but, given the circumstances, that just made you feel worse.

All you wanted to do was curl up and surrender yourself to whatever was about to happen. You were so tired of running, so tired of fighting.

You wanted to give up.

You just wanted to sleep.

But a familiar scent reached you, a scent that confused everything even more; Bucky.

Your head ached as you tried to process what was going on and how you’d come to be with Bucky and not Rumlow, and how you’d come to trade one kind of fear for another.

Slowly, you managed to get to your feet, despite the way that the room seemed to spin and the floor felt uneven beneath your feet. Looking around, you tried to find something that gave you some idea of what was going on, but there was nothing. The only things in the room were the bed, a small bedside table with empty drawers, and an empty wardrobe. The view from the window told you that you were in an apartment building, but you couldn’t tell where.

Once you’d finished looking around the room, you headed for the door, expecting to find it locked but, instead, it opened out into the rest of the apartment. 

And there he was.

Bucky was sitting on the sofa, but he got to his feet the second the door opened. You gripped the doorframe as your stomach knotted and cramped, fear coiling in your insides at the realisation you were trapped and there was no way you’d be able to escape him.

An uncomfortable silence hung in the air between you, neither of you moving, neither of you taking your eyes off the other. Your mind was racing, trying to figure out what was happening and why you were there instead of rotting in a cell or worse.

“What’s going on?” You finally forced yourself to ask, trying not to lean too heavily against the doorframe, not wanting to show him just how weak and vulnerable you were.

“Funny, I was gonna ask you the same thing,” he answered, anger and upset thick in his voice.

Finally, you let your gaze shift to the door and started weighing up whether you could reach it before he stopped you. And Bucky noticed, in fact, he took a step towards you, almost goading you to try your luck.

“Why am I here?” You asked, exhausting and discomfort intensifying with every second that passed.

“Because I want answers before I decide what to do with you,” Bucky answered. “The guys that tried to grab you were ex-Hydra, a hit squad - is that who you’re working for?”

“I’m not working for anyone.”

“So it’s personal then?”

“I’m not playing twenty questions with you,” you answered with a sharpness that he didn’t expect, a tone he’d never heard from you before. “Just get it over with.”

“Get what over with?” His confusion was almost believable, but you knew better than to think he didn’t know what you were talking about.

“Just kill me.”

“I don’t make a habit of killing unarmed omegas for no reason.”

“Right. Sure you don’t.” you scoffed sarcastically.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“It means drop the crap. I know you’re the Winter Soldier.”

Suddenly it felt like all the air had been sucked from the room and there was no missing the flicker of discomfort that crossed his face before a look of resignation appeared. You leaned against the doorframe all the more, watching as he struggled to respond, feeling worse by the second.

“So - what? - you came after me to settle a score?” He finally found his voice.

“You killed my brother,” you spat. “You ruined my life.”

Again, there was silence, but all you could think about was the suffocating heat in the room and how it felt like you could barely breathe, and how every breath you did manage to take filled your lungs with his scent.

Bucky had said something and was staring at you expectantly but your only response was to shake your head and start moving, limping towards the door knowing you couldn’t escape but wanting to try your luck regardless. You made it about halfway before you had to stop, the pain in your abdomen only getting worse until you were almost doubled over. Before you could think, before you could say anything, Bucky was at your side, catching you just as your legs crumpled beneath you.

Your vision blurred and you almost lost yourself in his scent and the way his arm pulled you against him in his attempts to steady you. And, for a moment, you wanted nothing more than to melt into his side and surrender yourself to whatever might happen, but you refused to give up that easily.

“No,” you muttered weakly, trying to push him away, “get off me.”

He didn’t let go, knowing that if he did you’d only end up on the floor.

“You need to lay down,” you heard him mutter, a tenderness in his voice that didn’t belong, a kindness you didn’t want or need.

As much as you tried to struggle, you found yourself led back into the bedroom and placed on the bed. The moment your head hit the pillow, everything went black.

------------

The revelation that he had killed your brother had left Bucky reeling. It wasn’t the first time that he’d been forced to confront his past as the Winter Soldier but it was turning out to be one of the most painful. He’d hurt you, taken something from you, and he’d never be able to make that right. The thought alone was enough to make him spiral.

As easy as it would have been to hide behind the idea that it hadn’t really been him, that the Winter Soldier wasn’t him, Bucky couldn’t separate himself from the pain he’d obviously caused you. And the worst part? He had no way of knowing who your brother was, no way of narrowing it down or understanding why; had your brother been his target, or had he just been collateral damage.

For a couple of hours he sat, thinking over all the terrible things he’d done, remembering all the things that haunted him, all the things he wouldn’t allow himself to forget in the hopes that something would spark a memory and he’d have the answers that he needed. But, the sorry truth of the matter was that he had far too much blood on his hands, too many deaths on his conscience.  

Whatever had happened, it seemed that his actions as the Winter Soldier had set you on a path that had put you in the crosshairs of dangerous people and, now that he had some idea of why, Bucky knew that he needed to try and make amends. He needed to try and help you. 

But, convincing you to let him was going to be the hardest part.

There was so much he didn’t know, but the majority of the anger and hostility he’d felt towards you had disappeared the moment he started to understand why you wanted him dead. Your words still rang in his ears; you ruined my life. It made him feel sick, but it was a sickness he’d felt before, a sickness he’d managed to work through.

When the bedroom door opened again a few hours later, he was shocked to see that, instead of looking better and rested, you somehow looked worse. You were barely keeping your balance as you stopped and looked at him, pure hatred in your eyes.

“What do you want with me?” You finally asked. “Am I your prisoner?”

“I don’t want anything. And, no, you’re not a prisoner,” Bucky answered, slowly getting to his feet and watching you closely, in case you collapsed again.

“So I can leave?”

“You can, but it’d hardly be the smartest option when you’ve got an ex-Hydra hit-squad looking for you,” he answered.

For a moment you gave him an indecipherable look, as if you were caught between shock and confusion that he’d put everything together so quickly. He didn’t bother to tell you it was because he’d had at least half a dozen people researching you and your assailants, trying to find out whatever they could.

“That’s how he found me...” you sighed under your breath but, before Bucky could ask, you were moving towards the door.

“Seriously?” He asked, clinging desperately to the last of his patience. “Just look at you, you can barely walk. How far do you think you’re gonna get?”

“Whose fault is that?” You snapped back.

“Seriously? You're gonna try and blame me? You jumped off the fire escape after trying to kill me,” he stated, moving to block you as you tried to reach the door.

“I thought you said I wasn’t a prisoner.”

No. You weren’t a prisoner but Bucky couldn’t let you go, not in your current state. You could barely stand and, besides, you had nowhere to go and nothing but your phone.

“You’re not, but if you think I’m gonna let you get yourself killed...”

“I can’t stay here with you,” you told him, trying to step around him.

“You’re not exactly a joy to be around either but you should at least wait until you’re well enough to -”

“My heat is about to start,” you finally admitted, hoping it would be enough to make him move. It wasn't.

“Seriously?” A moment later he was shaking his head. “All the more reason you should stay. You’re not gonna be able to look after yourself.”

“You’re fucking kidding, right?” You asked and the look he gave you was enough to tell you that he wasn’t. He was dead serious. “I can’t stay here with you.” 

“Don’t flatter yourself. I can control myself around an omega in heat,” he answered, annoyed by the implication.

But, if he was honest, he understood at least some part of your worry; the events of the night before were still burned into his memory and, even though that longing ache in his chest had dulled somewhat, it was still there.

“Said every alpha ever,” you muttered, turning away from him, obviously looking for another way out.

“Look, I get it -” he tried, following after you.

“No, you really don’t.”

“I killed someone close to you and I’m sorry -”

“Sorry?” You turned back towards him, tone dripping with disbelief. “I bet you don’t even remember him. I bet you don’t even remember why. You don’t get to tell me sorry.”

“You’re right,” Bucky conceded, “I don’t remember a lot of my time as the Winter Soldier, but I want to make this right.”

You lunged suddenly, almost losing your foot as your hands met his chest and pushed. He barely moved and you almost crumpled to the floor as you shoved him.

“There is no making this right,” you told him angrily, hitting a balled fist against his chest. “You can’t fix this. You can’t bring him back from the dead.”

“Maybe not, but I can keep you alive,” he answered stubbornly, gripping your arm for a moment so you didn’t fall. “I have some friends looking for the guys that tried to grab you, once they’re in custody I’ll take you back to your apartment and we’ll never have to see each other again, okay?”

But, obviously, it wasn’t okay.

“I. Can’t. Stay. Here.” You repeated, slowly, as if he was an idiot. (And maybe he was an idiot for trying to help you.) 

“If I was going to hurt you, don’t you think I would’ve done it by now?” He answered back, tone becoming clipped as he became more frustrated by the conversation. “Just... let me help you and, when all of this is all over and you can stand without looking like you’re gonna pass out, you can have your revenge.”

The offer was made more out of desperation than anything else; he just wanted you to be safe while he dealt with the people trying to hurt you. Everything else could come after.

You made your way into the kitchen and he watched you glancing out the window, as if you were weighing up the pros and cons of jumping from the fifth floor. There was panic on your face as you turned back and looked towards the front door again, but Bucky was starting to realise that he wasn’t the only thing making you feel that way.

“What’s the big deal? It’s not like this is your first heat.” He said because it couldn’t be - you must have been dealing with them for easily over a decade now.

Finally, you turned your attention back to him, no longer trying to hide your discomfort

“I haven’t had a heat in over five years,” you confessed with all of your previous anger. “I don’t do this. I don’t want to do this, especially not near you.”

Bucky chose to ignore the obvious insult. “Five years? How is that even possible?”

“Suppressants,” you snapped. “That I stopped taking so I could get close to you.”

“Oh, well I’m sorry my attempted murder was such an inconvenience to you,” he retorted sarcastically. He fell silent for a moment, watching as your trembling hand reached for the counter for support. “I thought you weren’t supposed to take them over long periods of time? Doesn’t that cause serious problems?”

“Wow, are you really going to stand there and try to alpha-splain it to me?”

“No, that’s not -” he stopped himself, seeing you tense in discomfort. “Can you just go sit down before you fall down?”

“I told you, I can’t -”

“Yeah, yeah, I heard you the first twenty times,” he said, moving towards you and wrapping an arm around your waist, forcibly leading you from the kitchen and into the bedroom again, depositing you on the bed.

You didn’t fight him, despite obviously wanting nothing more than to push him away from you. He wondered if being close to him had the same effect that being close to you had on him, if his scent was filling your lungs with every breath.

“I can see if I can find something, some suppressants or -”

“It’s too late. You have to take them before it starts...” you told him.

“Then what do you need?” He asked.

You looked shocked by the concern in his voice and the way he was looking at you - which, given you’d tried to kill him less than twenty-four hours ago, seemed fair. But Bucky ignored it. Whether it was alpha instincts or guilt over whatever he’d done to your brother, he just wanted to help you, look after you. It didn’t matter that you hated him. It didn’t even matter that he was almost certain you’d try to kill him again once you got the chance.

He needed to do this. He needed to try and fix whatever he’d broken, however he could.

“I need you to leave me alone,” you told him.

Bucky tongued the inside of his cheek, biting back a dozen comments that would probably only make the situation worse before relenting. He lingered for a few seconds before shrugging and letting out a sigh, before finally turning and leaving the room, closing the door behind him and giving you what you needed.

End Note : I know I'm probably raising more questions than I'm answering with this chapter but don't worry, everything will be answered eventually. And, yes, by Rumlow I do mean Brock (I'm saying he's still alive because I needed a bad guy 😅) Anyway, thanks for all the likes/comments/reblogs on the first chapter!

If you'd like to be tagged in future chapters, let me know!

Tag List : @greatenthusiasttidalwave

[one-time-i-dreamt]

Neil Gaiman made a Tumblr post where he said that you only truly realize your book is successful when you find omegaverse fics of it.