#feels like my life is paused

[4arconinoma]

things stabilizing a bit now. i'm finally somewhere with power internet and water for the forseeable future but my house is completely ruined. we lost most things and will have to completely clean and refurnish it 90% of our furniture and belongings are ruined. im honestly heartbroken and not taking it well. im going to stay IA for a bit longer just for my own sake and to sort things out but i'll slowly try to ease back into normalcy again at some point. im just exhausted now. not to mention that it might flood again due to heavy rain so im just in survival mode at the moment sorry dont know what else to do for now

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Burning Rotten Bridges

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[hajihiko]

Another silly

[dykedvonte]

Do you have anything you've been thinking on but just haven't made a post about it yet? Also I'm really enjoying your fic!

I have a few things but it's likely mostly headcanons that I consider somewhat disconnected from my analysis.

Curly's parents had him old, only child, died shortly after he graduated and got the pony express position. It was the last big thing they saw him do which is a reason he stayed for so long.

Doesn't admit how much their death affected him

Jimmy has a largish family. One of the cases of too many kids to keep tract of, parent never really noticed any of them nor their behaviors

Anya lived in a lot of houses growing up, regular supportive family that just struggled to support themselves.

Became a nurse largely to avoid their financial struggles but mostly because she felt too many people weren't being cared for and advocated for in the world properly

Swansea likes high top sneakers most. Likes how snug they fit and how they shield his ankles at work

Curly has a bit of a caffeine problem since he can’t sleep. Can occasionally be found wandering the ship at “night” when he had some too late or just couldn’t sleep.

Daisuke knows a little about a lot of things. Starts conversations with “did you know” a lot but please don’t ask him deeper questions

Curly has known Jimmy longer but has worked with Anya and Swansea longer, met them during his middle years, met Jimmy shortly before college.

Swansea rents a house, Daisuke’s family lives in a big nice apartment, Curly has a condo, Anya live in a small one bedroom apartment and Jimmy has a studio.

Curly's home is very disconcerting. It's too normal to a like uncanny degree.

Anya is ambidextrous but prefers her left.

Anya and Curly are both not native English speakers so occasionally they forget words and bond over the mutual mocking they get from the rest of the crew. Daisuke knows some Japanese but is still learning, never picked it up as a kid

Only Swansea and Daisuke know how to drive, Earth in my mind is very post capitalist so only older people and like the extremely wealthy can afford cars.

It's also like walkable just due to how many businesses are in your face. Probably strict living vs shopping districts

I have more but the way that I headcanon about them is like too long.

[crybaby-bkg]

have u ever considered gojo trying to tease you about how into it you get whenever you suck him off, but how flustered he gets when you admit yeah, I like it more than I thought i would, mainly because it’s you, because you’re so pretty to look up at, you always treats me so well when I’m on my knees for you. now you’ve killed him, especially with the way you’ve been touching yourself all the while running your tongue up at that one vein on his shaft. dead. gone and buried.

[aashiqeddiediaz]

yeah so im gonna overthink the lil pause eddie takes between "my...best friend." because that's such a choice and that descriptor always feels like it falls short when they talk about each other that way - if only because they are best friends, but they have always been a little bit more, too, and there is hardly a word in the english dictionary for that feeling - "best friends but more but not quite life partners yet"

[g1ngerbeer]

what kind of sauce are they putting in the link click audio drama. HELLO? THE LITERAL LAST SCENE OF THE LAST EPISODE?

程小时: 说起来，我们第一次见面，也是在篮球场吧。 陆光: 是啊。 程小时: 你我本无缘，全靠一颗球。 陆光: 我就不该答应你比那场。

cheng xiaoshi: speaking of which, the first time we met was also on a basketball court, wasn't it? lu guang: it was. cheng xiaoshi: (half-jokingly) you and i weren't meant to be [lit. "originally have no fate"?]. this is all because of one basketball. lu guang: i really shouldn't have agreed to play that match.

(the important bits are from google translate because i am bad at mandarin. also i did transcribe this off just the audio + i don't have access to captions or know where to find official transcripts. so i hope i got this right 🙏)

[drenched-in-sunlight]

youve probably gotten this question a dozen times but im just nosy, have you ever read grrm's other work a song of ice and fire? (NOT the tv show) if not, the way you post about messmer & marika's relationship makes me feel like youd love everything going on in those books haha

i do get a lot of comments telling me my OCs looks like characters from that (?) (and to this day i still do not look up any of those characters to see how they look like aksjfjkdfjkd), so a lot of ppl just assume i've read those books but i have never read any of it. yeah 🥲🥲

but some of my mutuals do blog about the show and the books a lot, and ngl after the DLC, im kinda curious ? so maybe i'll check it out in the future... idk yet.

last time i checked out a Western fantasy series........... it was crazy. (the fit i was having after i read through all Witcher books because of the TV show...... idk if anyone even remember that phase of this blog, but the reason i started playing videogame in the first place is because of Witcher)

up until this point i only look at Elden Ring in comparison to other Fromsoft games (and Sinosphere culture influence in the theme and design), but lately i do feel like i should check out GRRM work as well, but i also feel like it'd literally make my brainrot even worse so................ decision, decision.

[sillystar7]

i wanna be loved gently and loudly is that too much to ask 😭😭

[stuckinapril]

.

[crimeronan]

probably i SHOULDN'T migrate elsewhere if tumblr goes belly-up. i just scrolled thru my dash for 20 minutes and in that short span i could feel myself transform from a mildly tired 27-year-old butch into an active serial killer.

[andvys]

what does one do with their life when they feel lost

[izzy-b-hands]

Was doing okay holding back all of the fear re: the potential election outcome until literally this second what the fuck to my brain lmao

[ekuboo]

Needle felting my boy……

Process breakdown (disambiguation) in tags :)

[harmaanoita]

.

[creativebrainrot]

Had realizations recently. i got misgendered once recently and it bothered me, but i realized it mostly bothered me because I kept replaying it, obsessively thinking about it. i made myself stop when i realized that i was thinking about ONE moment of that entire day way too much, it wasnt even intentionally derogatory, just a stranger's assumption. And when i was younger i straight up didnt care, mostly because i hadnt RealizedTM yet, so i kinda lost that "idgaf" attitude towards strangers ideas of me and "passing." and like. yeah, i care. but i shouldnt let it get to me as much- which is something i am lucky to be able to do. im glad that i can find a happiness for myself without any healthcare. because ive had this "who gives a shit about a strangers assumption everyone is always making four billion assumptions about eachother- even I do that, so why focus on ONE assumption about me out of the pile." and it gave me back that "I am me. I have my gender, i am nonbinary, and only close relationships get the details <3" attitude back which is GREAT im SO HAPPY right now like i even see "A Man" when i look in the mirror today.

i like pink i like glitter i like "feminine" elegance, extravagance, i like glamour makeup i like "goth fem-dom" for its aesthetic traits it gives me gender euphoria. i like my chest i like pushup bras i like being treated "nicely" i like being "admired" i like all of that. and im still a man, im still me.

so happy to be returning to my roots, who give a fuck what strangers assume about me, strangers assume shit about each other all the fucking time, thousands of times a day. why should i care about one single assumption out of the pile? i shouldn't! i only care about my own life experience, the intimate relationships i keep, and my reflection.

i want to feel good.

im gonna make this last for myself, finally. There's no one in my life to force me backwards, I'm 23 now, I'm finally free of abuse and an awful situation. I am finally living! so no more holding back "for" strangers and no more being held back by the concepts of passing or misgendering for me.