#fave stinky bastard man

[youvebeenlivingfictional]

This Didn't Happen

Notes: Just a silly thing; prompts 7 & 15 taken from this Morning After prompt list.

Pairing: Nathan Bateman x Reader

Rating: M

Warnings: Sexual implications; behavior expected of our fave billionaire stinky bastard man

Summary: Had you gone to the conference planning to sleep with Nathan Bateman? No.

Had you? Yes.

Were you regretting it? Absolutely.

"Stop smiling at me."

"I'm not smiling."

"Yes you are."

"How do you know? You're not even looking at me."

"I don't need to look at you, I can feel it from here." You tried to smooth your rumpled clothing before drawing in a deep breath to steady yourself, gathering your thoughts.

Had you gone to the conference planning to sleep with Nathan Bateman? No.

Had you? Yes.

Were you regretting it? Absolutely.

The sex had been (insanely, mind-bogglingly) good. You were still sensitive, still buzzing from your orgasm as you tried to plan a graceful exit. It was proving difficult, given the circumstances—but there was no smooth way to dip out of a one night stand. Almost all of the conference attendees were staying at the same hotel as you were. What if you ran into someone that you knew in the hallway? Your wrinkled clothes would give you away immediately.

You gathered your courage before you forced yourself to turn and look at him.

Nathan was smiling—lounging in the bed with a satisfied smirk as he put his glasses back on and fixed you with a knowing gaze. You wanted to slap the look off of his face, but some part of you was certain that he would enjoy it. Not only was he smiling, but he looked criminally gorgeous. His cheeks were still slightly flushed from exertion; his forehead was still dotted with sweat; you were trying to ignore the few streaks of irritated skin where your nails had dug into his shoulder.

"We're not gonna cuddle?" He teased, brows waggling. You scoffed, turning away and beginning to hunt around his hotel room for your shoes.

"Listen, Bateman—"

"You have my attention."

"Good, 'cause I'm really gonna need you to focus up right now." You faced him again, planting your hands on your hips and forcing a stern set to your brow. "This didn't happen. Got it?"

"Didn't it?"

"No."

Nathan blinked at you a couple of times, lips curling into a teasing smile as he glanced toward to marks on his shoulder.

"Huh. Then I wonder where these came from."

"The mystery may never be solved." Son of a bitch, where are you goddamn shoes—

"So if anyone asks what we got up to this evening—?"

"Make something up," You snapped.

"What's your alibi?"

"I'll figure it out when I get back to my room."

"What if you run into someone in the elevator and they ask?"

"I'll make something up."

"You oughta brainstorm now. You don't improvise well."

"Thanks for the tip."

"They're under the desk."

"What?"

"Your shoes."

You went still, slowly glancing in that direction, and wincing when you spotted them. How the hell did they get under there?

"You kicked them off," Nathan added. "Almost broke your neck. Remember?"

You ignored the goad, picking them up and hurriedly pulling them on before heading for the door. You heard the rustle of sheets as Nathan pushed them off of his lap and stood.

"Hey," He called out.

"What?"

"You sure this never happened?"

"Positive."

You reached for the doorknob, freezing as Nathan crowded up against your back. You shivered at the feeling of his body pressing against yours, lips brushing the shell of your ear.

"I hope it doesn't happen again sometime," He murmured. You began to turn to look back at him, only to spot yourself in a small mirror by the door. Your eyes narrowed as you spotted a mark blooming on your neck, and you couldn't stop yourself from whirling around to look at him.

"Did you really have to leave a giant hickey on my neck?!"

Nathan smirked, gaze sweeping over your face before he tipped his head to the side, getting a better look at the hickey.

"What makes you think I did that?"

Tag list: @missredherring ; @fantasticcopeaglepasta ; @massivecolorspygiant ; @blueeyesatnight ; @recklessworry ; @amneris21 ; @ew-erin ; @youngkenobilove ; @carbonated-beverage ;  @moonlightburned ; @milf-trinity ; @millllenniawrites ; @chattychell ; @dihra-vesa​ ; @videogamesandpoorlifechoices​ ; @missswriter ; @thembosapphicclown ; @brandyllyn ; @wildmoonflower ; @buckybarneshairpullingkink ; @mad-girl-without-a-box ; @winchestershiresauce ; @lorecraft ; @kmc1989 ; @writefightandflightclub ; @thedukeofcaladan ; @beepboopyoda ; @foxilayde ; @rachelwritesstuff

[cilil]

Feanor and Mairon for the blorbo bingo!

Thanks so much for the ask!❤️

Fëanor:

All the violent things: It's Fëanor. But also: It's Fëanor. Can't help but love Mr. Feener The Angry Mini Melkor Garden Gnome.

The therapy part is self-explanatory🤣

~

Mairon:

What can I say. He's hot, he's evil, he's fun. If I had to choose a fave, it might be him.

While we don't use the S-word on this blog (for the most part), I will honor the fact that various people in Middle-earth basically call him "stinky bastard man" as is, so that's a given. The soggy toilet paper and subsequent blanket and hot soup are Númenor-related. The "why must things keep happening" refers to the fact that he keeps making God Himself come down from heaven to stop his shenanigans.

[occultopossum]

Which oc are you feeling the most today and what's your favorite thing about them?

Unforunately Jaedan is usually my fave oc at any given time, He's the stinky bastard man I keep reblogging all the time lol And most frequently have the brain rot for, for years now Many things, mostly complicated disaster, and 'can't die and makes it everyone elses problem'

Part of the thought with this, he'lllll just walk it off fine

[janeelyakiri]

Who would serenade their s/o? What would they sing? :0

Macaw- nope too shy

Lupo- would give it the ol' college try! He'd go for something sweet and soft.

Falcon- Heavy metal counts, right?

Jackal- Absolutely but the lyrics most definitely are NSFW

Jay- He'd try and he'd be bad at it

Fox- Nooopeee but he'd play soothing music for them

Crow- Too shy to sing, but put some Fallout Boy on and he can't help it. He might try!! Blushing all while doing so.

Hound- Bastard stinky man is a memelord and would either sing Rick Astley, the tequilla song, or some other meme worthy song.

Vulture- He might try to sing something low and dark. It might come across vaguely threatening lol

Hyena- Would practice hard and sing and try to smooth his voice some, find his s/o's fave song and sing it for them

Robin- nnnope

Dingo- Lullabies. They're easy on his throat and easy to remember.

[mutatiio]

𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐔𝐍.

— BASICS! ♡

NAME: break or b

PRONOUNS: they/them

ZODIAC SIGN: scorpio

TAKEN OR SINGLE: single but also married to @ecopoison

— THREE FACTS! ♡

i do pottery!! nothing too fancy yet but i've made a few things that i think are really cool. i'd like to get back into it but i have very little time and it is quite time-consuming.

i've been writing for a long time. i think since i was 10/11. my mom really didn't monitor my online activities lmao.

i have terrible taste. most of my faves are stinky men.

— EXPERIENCE! ♡

PLATFORMS USED: tumblr (current), bebo, twitter, discord (current) and during a dark, dark period of my life i used......... facebook.

PLOTTING / WINGING IT / MEMES: I enjoy all. i find it hard to jump straight into a thread without discussing some things. i lean towards vague plotting and memes.

— MUSE PREFERENCE! ♡

GENDER: bastard men.

MULTI OR SINGLE MUSE: multis that turn into singles lmao. i don't think anyone would guess that i write more than just maul. my last blog, a gotham one, turned into a one-man jerome show. and before that, a one-man midori show.

LEAST FAVOURITE FACECLAIM(S): any youtubers is always off-putting for me. or maybe just any faceclaim that isn't actually an actor.

— FLUFF / ANGST / SMUT! ♡

FLUFF: i don't dislike it, but it can't be the only thing i write bc then i'd be so bored. however maul needs some fluff, my man is dying out here.

ANGST: i eat it for breakfast. give it all to me.

SMUT: very rarely. i don't actually enjoy writing it, but rather... plotting?? how it would go. writing it feels to repetitive (though that may be more from lack of skill and interest). i'm too aro/ace to really get into it.

[kore-arts]

Violence ask game 13

Worst Blorbofication

Hmmmmn

I would honestly have to say All For one. SPECIFICALLY The Nice Soft Versions of him that try to justify him. He is a Stinky Evil Cat and it feels so weird when I read "nice" Dfo that's nice to everyone

That man at most would only care for his family. Even then.

It's just weird and ick. Stinky Bastard I hate him. He deserves a Brutal Pipe Murder.

[ryuutchi]

lol they turned off reblogs…thank u for standing up for ppl. my heart leapt in my throat when i read that post about the corinthian. like i dont ship for gay rep...i just ship bc my monkey brain spotted something blorbo shaped :/

It reminds me a lot of the way kink dynamics in general make a lot of people uncomfortable as explicitly PLAY versions of "natural" real world dynamics. Straight men are allowed to love violent, and even misogynistic male heros. It's normal. A queer-coded villain comes along, and it's not normal to enjoy or love them because they're villains and queer. They're supposed to be unlovable. Then a queer person comes along, looks at The Corinthian and thinks "yeah, this is the gay boogeyman and I Love Him" and it's play-- the consensual owning and loving of monstrousness is a refusal to play along with norms.

Anyway, it's probably not that deep but here I am

Also, I'd like to note they never did tell me whether Hannibal was also Bad, and blocked me after I pointed out HBO was airing gay RPF about Blackbeard this year.

[filibusterfrog]

This is your personal head canon for elven hair colors... But please rethink dark hair, those of us who have it would like to think an elf who looks like us isn’t bad luck. :(

i just wanted some superstition surrounding hair colour, it has no basis in fact, and luck of elves is not actually determined by hair colour. I chose dark hair to suit the backstory of a character of mine, and not because i actually believe that dark hair is A Bad Thing

[your-fave-is-a-gremlin]

Mark Beaks from Ducktales 2017 is a gremlin!

[melongumi]

MDZS for the blorbo ask meme!

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most)

Being full of Headcanons and Opinions and Opinions on Headcanons and also, you know, multiple WIPS (and also a tendency to try to make every AU idea About Him sooner or later), I think I'm obligated to admit that this one is Wen Ning. Wangxian also, because I Am Their Target Audience.

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)

I have no idea... maybe Sizhui because Zhen Fanxing did a very good job making expressions that say “i am a Nice Young Man :)” A+ would pinch his cheeks like an obnoxious auntie and put too much food on his plate. Also, from a doylistic standpoint, am always down to see him go off to destroy people with dark magics or bangin’ qin solos or whatever else. A good boy.....

Also Fairy, who is after all a fat and also very fluffy dog.

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)

Wen Qing and Jiang Cheng....... my beloved blorbos-in-law. Outside of very specific scenarios, I find them underutilized in fandom. Also, when they do appear, that doesn’t guarantee that they’re being written with the full Jiang-Cheng-Wen-Qing-ness that they deserve >:0 !!! (also, the concentration of jc-bashing in newer fics on ao3 just keeps... rising. hey what the fuck. @ the responsible parties how does it feel to be history’s biggest cowards)

Honorable mention for Every dead wen and jiang that isn’t part of the ruling family, plus a particular shout-out to Wei Changze because canon characters also forget that he exists.

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week)

Whenever I am looking for a reference in the original novel by searching for Wen Ning's name, I realize all over again how infrequently and briefly he actually appears in text despite spending basically the whole book within a mile or two of our heroes. Unfair.

Also, if anyone ever actually Did anything with Yanling Daoren, I would lose it tbh. [points] i wanna know what’s up with THIS asshole

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)

Lan Xichen and Xue Yang, not because Lan Xichen is particularly controversial, but because these two are the most enjoyable to look at and think “you are the ultimate architect of this problem you are having. poor little meow meow”

Mind you--Lan Xichen isn’t the ultimate architect of his own problems, but he is the project manager so like. You know.

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)

If meow meows are for making their own problems, plinko is for outside problems being inflicted upon them. Nie Mingjue and Jin Guangyao are both so good for this in such very different ways. They are such stinky bastard men. Jin Guangyao is god's perfect killing machine but can't stop anyone from picking him up and messing his hair. Usually does make half of his own problems but makes sure they're everyone else's problem too. Honestly, the less in-control of a situation he is, the better off his long-term happiness is likely to be. That he hates every second of it when it's ultimately good for him? Funnie.

Nie Mingjue, meanwhile, needs to be shrunk in the wash and felted in the dryer. Its character building,

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)

I don’t think saying Jin Guangshan for this is creative or funny, but like... it’s true.

Also Xiao Xingchen, but in his case because casting him as Castiel and literally sending him to literal superhell would, in fact, be hilarious. 🙏

[imissthembutitwasntadisaster]

What which Mech you stan says about you

(Disclaimer: these aren’t to be taken seriously whatsoever).

Jonny: EITHER you took one look at him and said “haha stinky bastard feral man,” and decided to absolutely support that, OR you’ve been through some shit and are projecting like crazy.  If you’re the latter, you probably think about his backstory at like 2 in the morning and start crying about it.  Honestly, both these options are extremely valid.  You either love the belts, or hate the belts.  You are definitely the type to insult your faves to show how much you love them.      

Nastya: You’re actually a really nice person.  Like, I genuinely like you, you have excellent vibes.  Congratulations.  You’re a sucker for found family, and your favorite fanfic trope is either Fluff or Hurt/Comfort.

Ashes: You’re either extremely chaotic and a little scary, or you’re just awestruck by them.  Either way, you definitely find them attractive.  You have considered committing a crime, even if you haven’t actually done it.  You probably listen to Magnus Archives primarily for Basira and Daisy, and honestly, that’s fair. 

Tim:  You’re basic.  I’m so sorry.  You’re also thirsty.  You have listened to GTvsMK hundreds of times, and you know what? it has slapped every. single. time.  You probably cosplay, or are interested in cosplay.

Ivy: You Deserve Rights.  You’re either a quiet friend or a mom friend and you often feel underappreciated.  You were most likely a “gifted child.”  You used to be able to consume three books a day without breaking a sweat, but you can now no longer do that, and mourn those times.  As with Nastya, I probably like you. 

Brian:  Your favorite album is HNOC, and you probably lost it over the Tube Sun discovery.  You think about morality a lot, and probably have tried to discuss philosophy with your friends.  You’re a bit quiet, but most likely have some Hidden Depths.  You HAVE listened to Lost in the Cosmos late at night while it rained outside, and it DID make you cry.      

Raphaella:  Marry me.  You’re iconic.  Your fashion sense is impeccable.  You’re probably smart and like learning stuff.  You most likely have tons of OCs, because you love creating tragic backstories when there is a lack of them.  You’re either sweet or unhinged, but you always just like having a good time hanging out with your friends.      

Marius:  You’re here for a good time, not a long time.  Let’s be honest, you appear to be a lovely thoughtful person, but really you’re a little bastard.  You would like most of Taylor Swift’s Reputation just thematically, even if you don’t like the genre.    

Toy Soldier:  You feel a little bit like the odd one out in a lot of situations, and mostly you just want to be understood and happy.  You keep telling people to listen to Jessica Law’s other discography, and Lovers and Fighters is one of your top albums of all time, which makes perfect sense and I applaud your taste. You have spent way too much time trying to make sense of TS’s backstory.  You love your friends a lot.           

[koscheyyy]

Give me that TMA Glup Shitto.

Thank you so much for asking! I got another for tma so im just going to put everything into this one.

1. Blorbo (favorite character, character I think

about the most)

My blorbo is Elias💜 boo me all you want but I love that stinky rat bastard so much that i just want to kick him down the stairs! Hes like a little lap dog that i just carry around in my purse, we have brunches together while i brush his hair.

2. Scrunkly (my "baby", character that gives me

cuteness aggression, character that is So

Shaped)

My little scrunkly is Jonathan Sims, head Jarchivist of the Magnus institute, London. Hes just so *makes hand scrunching movements* y’know? Hes my baby. My special little boy. My omen of great fear and death. My silly rabbit :3

3. Scrimblo bimbo (underrated/

underappreciated fave)

Hezekiah wakely. That bitch had the most amazing name and also just wanted a dirt nap which i can relate to as i write this from my bed in which ive lain for the past two hours.

4. Glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can

appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and

I won't shut up about it for a week)

Say it with me: S I M O N F A I R C H I L D. Wrinkly old pink skeleton man i love youuuuuuu!! His statements were always my favourite and god karim kronfli’s voice is like if you melted chocolate into a bowl of more melted chocolate and then served it with a spoon made out of melted chocolate. Hes just delightful in every way and reminds me of my wonderful grandad.

5. Poor little meow meow ("problematic"/

unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic

fave)

I guess that would be Peter. He was just a bit pathetic wasn’t he? Go pretend to captain your cringe boat and suck at saving your failing marriage. Oh but i love him, he really thought his apartment complex was a good idea and ive just got to stand and hug him when it inevitably failed like a parent calming a kid down after they scraped their knee. Poor little meow meow peter ;-;

6. Horse plinko (character I would torment for

fun, for whatever reason)

Jurgen leitner? Stupid idiot motherfucking jurgen lietner god damn fool book collecting dust eating rat old bastard shithead idiot avatar of the whore-

Just kidding, it would be the ghost spider fron that one episode where it haunted the dude because i have been living that reality for years now. I hate the ghost spider and it keeps coming back! Send help.

7. Eeby deeby (character I would send to

superhell)

MAXWELL RAYNER.

Absolutely 100% cant fucking stand the twat. None of his plans made sense and honestly hes the shittiest avatar ever and i just spent the last paragraph calling peter out on being forty year old virgin! I HATE Maxwell Rayner with a passion and id personally spend my life watching his old man ass slinky its way down the plinko steps of eeby deeby for eternity just to calm the rages i feel when i even think of this tit of a cult leader. “Im going to body swap into a 12 year old boy because that is a good and rational idea!” Piss off you vitamin C lacking cunt!

[strawberrycatty]

Are we pissing our pants yet?

• I'm Strawberry, formerly known as mimitheking before the porn ban nuked my blog. I'm also good with Berry/Cat/Catty (Basically just call me whatever)

• I have a sona! A follower designed him for me once! He's a pisset dog (pitbull/basset mix) named Dandelion.

• they/them pronouns only, and please don't ask about my assigned gender.

• I'm 25, and here's the obligatory 18+ only! Minors seeing my content feels super uncomfortable and creepy so please don't.

• I'm actually vanilla af and omorashi is pretty much my only kink. I'm gray-ace and aromantic and solely interested in fictional characters, so real life people have no appeal to me. Also, (cis)male omo only, to put it simply, I enjoy dick ok thank you.

• If I do reblog real life content it will be tagged as "real life omo". Fictional content is highly preferred but content of my faves is scarce.

• Mainly love long-winded desperation and wetting that follows. Not a fan of nudity unless it's in a "barely made it" situation, but even then it's just... I don't want them to make it lmao. Piss Your Pants why do you think I'm here?

• loud whining and moaning and blushing is just >////<

• I love smut and I love omo, but I strongly dislike them mixed together. My omo needs to be innocent, if it's sexual or even intentional wetting it's just not for me. Wate/rsports is a big no-no, you won't find that here.

• I dislike diapers in sexual situations but I do find them kinda cute,, like if someone's wearing one I just wanna cuddle them. But innocently.

• I don't do holds/wetting myself; I tried before and I'm just not into it. I only like to watch (and comfort).

• I'm pro-mind-my-own-fuckin-business so all sorts of antis please don't interact. If you go out of your way to attack people for what stuff they like then do not speak to me. You're free to follow and reblog stuff but if anyone starts drama in comments or tags of my posts they'll be blocked.

• no i don't want gifs of your pissing dick in my inbox, thanks 💞

Current fandoms are mainly dc and twd, I also like/will be happy to talk about enc/an/to, htt/yd, dra/gon prin/ce, at/la, tro/llhu/nte/rs, da/nny pha/nto/m, blo/od of ze/us, mys/tic mes/seng/er, bo/tw, bea/sta/rs, pok/ém/on|tea/m roc/ket (and a ton more casual ones i can't think of rn). I'm mostly a cartoon person rather than into anime. Mainly I love villains teehee who doesn't like a good stinky bastard man pissing his pants

[lasquadrasfuckhouse]

*breaks down door*

YOU HAVE BIRDS?????? AND I HAVENT SEEN THEM YET????? OH! YOU KICK MIETTE?

I demand to see them so I can dawn over them immediately

-✨ anon

I DO!!!!! i love them very very much and that's why i love thinking about sorlato with a bird because they're fucking crazy LOL they're how i break the ice in any new group chat too i'll just be like '............. y'all wanna see my birds'

this is beaky!!!!! my roommate has had him since he was a baby, he's turning 14 this year. he is pet shop coded because he is also a little birdie man who can and will shank u. sometimes the only way we can get him to listen is to say 'hey, old man' in our best jotaro voices. he enjoys old man hobbies such as grocery shopping, budgeting, and playing mahjong, and he is the real head of this household. he folds his little baby man feets politely while he commits tax fraud. he will get angy if you wear shoes or hats in the house. he smells like a dust bunny, his favorite show is evangelion, and he'll often go brrrr like a phone. his assigned fruit is banana b/c he Is a banana and they're his favorites, but he also loves spinach, lettuce, corn, the occasional cheezie usually on his birthday, and he also likes to chew on apple stems

this is spooky!!!!! she's 5 1/2. she's a chaotic little bastard and we love that for her. we're pretty sure she's the goblin babe from labyrinth and that she fell into the bog of eternal stench, she's a stinky princess (sometimes even after baths still) but when she's clean she smells like celery. she is very tolerant and loves to be gently squished against ur face. she loves to whistle and i'm trying to teach her another one bites the dust. her assigned fruit is dragonfruit because she's grey white pink and speckly, her lil nose and feets go pink when she gets worked up and she has hidden speckles under her wings and i think her tail feathers too (which, fun facts, is typically a male cockatiel thing so we think she may be intersex), and she does indeed like dragonfruit!!!! but her faves are spinach, lettuce, raspberries, korean melons, apples, and cornflowers

and this is normandy!!!! she's 5, which is an adult for a sun conure but she seems determined to stay baby. she'll regrow green feathers on her upper wings, grab her tail with her footie when she wants to wrestle, and try to feed off our fingies or noses like babies would to parent birds (it's this thing). we named her for the normandy from mass effect (and she is VERY good at playing mass effect). she'll be pleased as punch to sit directly in front of your face and lick you like a puppy. she has so much love and kindness stored in one tiny form. she primarily communicates through kissy noises but she also has expressive dances, whispers garbled baby bird secrets, laughs (like actually 'haha'), screams for fun when we get her up in the morning like a rooster, and imitates water bottle gurgling and my roommate's asthmatic huffing. she smells like tea because she drinks some every day with my roommate and once tried to bathe in a special blend. her assigned fruit is mango (duh), which she loves, but she also loves apples, blueberries, raspberries (her beak has raspberry stains in that photo lol), and pistachios

[redbullseb]

Let's have a collective breakdown over white man I want to fuck and steal gender from, the one and only Frank Iero.

-vettelsbitch

THANK U <3 last but certainly not least!!! the love of my life ever, the one and only man on earth i would genuinely do anything for <3 you might think i love seb a lot but buddy you'd be wrong because this man is my numero uno my main bitch the source of happiness and pain th-- [gets shot]

(and my final essay of the night before i dip bc i have ppl over! thank u all for playing!)

pencey prep: what's his shirt made of? boyfriend material. he's my dorky feral punk bf who my parents don't want me seeing but i sneak out at night to go to basement concerts with him and make out with him under the cover of darkness. that's his vibe.

bullets: zooms in with a camcorder THAT'S HIM. our sweet baby. desperately trying to keep clean and sanitary in a van next to gerard stinky way. glue dreads. psychology to art major at rutgers. he's the baby ever he's so unhinged it hurts

revenge: GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! IF LOVE IS BLIND CROSS OUT MY EYES I DON'T MIND AT ALL!!!!!! im so care he this is my FAVOURITE frank. red eyeshadow skunk hair Xs over his eyes pansy my beloved!!! i don't even have words in the english language to express the place that revenge frank holds in my heart he is just special he is my little meow meow i don't know if i want to be him or if i want to date him

tbp: that behind-the-scenes vid of the wttbp mv where he puts his finger up to his nose like it's a moustache. Yeah <3

prorev frank specifically: GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! GENDER! HORNY FERAL SO HORNY SO FERAL BITING A CONDOM ON STAGE FUCKING HIS GUITAR BEING A PUBLIC NUISANCE CAN YOU BELIIEVVEEE THIS MAN WAS MARRIED???????????

leathermouth: the way he was like "i don't have to be nice" shut up and scream bitch boy <3 leviathan is the rating here. i can't breathe when i'm getting pegged or whatever lm frank said

des row: his constant spit fountains also the end of the vid where he sticks his tongue out wehjkfhgkljdfgj acab, baby.

danger days: i got the gif off gfycat oops idk the creator but HELLO????????????? HEEELLLLOOOOOOOO?????????? there's also this one vid of destroya live and the way frank plays the outro is so. tender and h word and HSDHGJDKFGKJFDKHADHGHGFHDHG THIS MAN.

cellabration: joyriding vid is like my comfort mv ever i just love my boy covered in mint-flavoured blood ok!!!!!!!!!!! wehdflkfjg there's one vid where his kids come on stage to sing and he cuts out the line about wanting to die with the cutest most sheepish smile on his face and he is so CUTEEEEEEE idk if it's actually cellabration era but he's like in his metamorphosis stage where he's happy and surrounding himself by good non-toxic people and esp after how fucking depressing his ftw/skeleton crew era was this is like one of my fave things and stomachaches is an About Me album bhdfgbhdbfgjhbdf oop

parachutes: this era was especially terrifying with That Incident. wehwehhdfhg i fucking love this album and his promo photoshoot though like he's just! dilf!

death spells: A FRANK I HOLD SO VERY DEAR TO MY HEART but fuck james he can burn in hell. anyway he's soo funky he's so short so interesting that one part in fantastic bastards where he's like "i'm a mess when we touch" and the crowd always screams "DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME!" also SHOEBOX FRANK both at skate n surf festival and that one show we have hd pics for bc he's too short to reach his setup and he's so fucking emo (he fell apart) and like ftwillz energy off the fucking chain AM I MAKING SENSE? IS THIS COMPREHENSIBLE? brain empty just death spells fav fav fav fav fav

violents/violence: it broke my heart when he was like "i was never able to write a happy song until barriers" but DO YOU SEE HOW HAPPY HE IS THESE DAYS? HE'S JUST VIBING WITH HIS KIDS AND RESCUING TURTLES AND DECORATING PANSY WITH HIS FOOTBALL MERCH AND IN THE CREATIVE POCKET AND HE'S LESBIAN IN THE UNCLASSICAL SENSE AND HE'S TRENDED FOR DYING HIS HAIR AND HE GOT A NEW PHONE BUT CAN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO TALK TO HIS FRIENDS HE WENT ON "TOUR" WITH HIS KIDS AND LET HIS SON MAKE SOUNDS AND CALLED IT ALL MUSIC AND HE SAW THE BLACK WIDOW TODAY HE'S SO ANNOYING HE'S SO DILF IT'S FUCKING CRAZY jamia puts up with SOOOO much bless her soul i fucking love him. so much i think i'm tearinng up a little he means everything to me this parasocial relationship is the unhealthiest thing and i'm mad at him all the fucking time but i'm never getting over him ever okay bye

[macabrecabra]

Transformers (any universe) for the fandom thing

Ohhh! 83 For this one, I'm jumping around universes as...different idiots fill different niches for me! I put it all below the cut to keep it from getting long post = w =

blorbo (favorite character, character i think about the most) SHOCKWAVE (any universe, Shockwave is always the logical choice and you can pry that out of my cold dead servos) Favorite of the Shockwaves is TFA, Shockwave, the cryptid elk. That design was *chef kiss* and great personification of both logic and cold calculative nature = w = Close second is Knockout because who doesn't like a good pirma donna that decides the autobots are better for his finish?

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is so shaped) STARSCREAM of course. He is stinky bastard man but when he is on screen I just go "BABY STINKY BASTARD!" because he is WIle E Coyote with his schemes. But it is adorable! ....Armada Starscream is most adorable though. Trying not to act like he didn't enjoy being treated nicely when with Autobots. Tsunderescream.

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave) SWINDLE Ya'll don't appreciate this used car salesman that is actual car and he needs to appear in more properties, selling out to both sides his cheap useless crap. Slapping dangerous weapons like this thing is made of so many minicons. All designs of Swindle must all have a bolo tie. That is all.

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and i won’t shut up about it for a week) SIDEWAYS I'm sure no one really heard of him as I'm sure most people do not speak of Transformers Armada, but Sideways was the scheming gremlin tiny former who had the coolest transformation of any motorcycle ever and I would love to see his matrix hacker bastard self show up.

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave) WRECK-GAR Not sure if he is problematic or controversial...but garbage man is not often a popular pick for things and he doesn't do much but dare to be stupid and swim in literal trash, but I love him all the same for it <3

horse plinko (character i would torment for fun, for whatever reason) SENTINEL PRIME he was mean to Optimus Dad in TFA and that is unforgivable. He created a stupid plot in the Bayformer universe and that is triple unforgivable. IDW Sentinel Prime did some redemption though so he will just get poked fun at and be the but of everyone's jokes.

eeby deeby (character i would send to superhell) ALL THE BAYFORMERS Every single one of them. There is not one that is redeemable because any character they could have had was butchered. It is like the alternate hell-verse where the original transformers would look upon it and scream. Optimus Prime and Galvatron would put aside differences to join forces to destroy these abominations. Not even Unicron would want to devour the Earth Universe where these squiggly pointy monstrosities wiggle around in their poorly CGI trash compactors designs. Let these devils be cast into deepest hell, the junkpits of the Brave Little Toaster to sing musicals to their death of being compacted smaller than Shockwave compacted Blur.