#fast math tricks

[edusquaremaths]

Square of numbers around 100 Part-2 | #squaretrick #vedicmaths #mathtricks #shortvideo #vedicmaths

Square Tricks | Maths Tricks | Vedic Maths| Square tricks for 99, 98, 97, 96…Cool tricks by @EduSqaureMathsSquare Tricks | Multiplication Tricks | Maths Tricks | Vedic Mathsshorts #short #shortvideo #mathsedusquaremaths #squareofanumber

[relto]

optimization journey: glue 10000+ arrays together for each data channel -> reduce number of array glueing required by doing 32 sequences at once -> NO array glueing at all!

[roach-works]

speculative fiction writers i am going to give you a really urgent piece of advice: don't say numbers. don't give your readers any numbers. how heavy is the sword? lots. how old is that city? plenty. how big is the fort? massive. how fast is the spaceship? not very, it's secondhand.

the minute you say a number your readers can check your math and you cannot do math better than your most autistic critic. i guarantee. don't let your readers do any math. when did something happen? awhile ago. how many bullets can that gun fire? trick question, it shoots lasers, and it shoots em HARD.

you are lying to people for fun. if you let them do math at you the lie collapses and it's no fun anymore.

[bavanisblog]

"10 Fast Math Tricks to Boost Your Calculation Speed | Easy Math Hacks" ...

[nexus-nebulae]

actually making a concerted effort to learn written japanese (since I've learned a small amount of spoken already) and. oh boy did not realise how hard it is for my brain to learn new symbols

[sirfrogsworth]

When I got to this photo in Katrina's collection of vintage family imagery, I was pretty stumped as to how to approach it.

There is a major problem when you zoom in to 100%.

The paper it was developed on has little micro bumps. When it was scanned, the light from the scanner caused a highlight on one side of the bump and a shadow on the other. This causes a pattern which is nearly impossible to eliminate using traditional techniques.

The easiest way to fix this is actually quite clever. You scan it once, then turn it upside down and scan it again. The second pass reverses the side the highlight and shadow appear on, so you can combine the images in Photoshop and blend them together, essentially canceling out the bumps. It's weirdly analogous to noise canceling headphones.

But I don't have access to the physical copy of this image.

So... now what?

Enter Fast Fourier Transform or FFT.

This is a filter that uses extra fancy math to recognize patterns in the image and eliminate them. There is a pretty good filter for Photoshop, but it does not work easily with newer Macs with Apple Silicon. I really did not want to figure that out, and I also was too tired to go downstairs to my PC. However, I learned that a Photoshop competitor, Affinity Photo, has this filter built in. So, I downloaded a trial copy and started the process of trying to figure out how to fix this image.

It was amazingly simple. It brings up these star patterns and you just paint black circles over every one but the center. It literally felt like magic. (Full screen with sound recommended)

So once I did this process I ended up with this...

The paper still had a rough texture but it was much easier to work with using traditional techniques. I started with a black and white conversion and meticulously went through the photo zapping scratches and flaws and balancing tones and sharpening facial features. All of my photo restoration tricks were needed.

I eventually landed here...

I then thought maybe I should match the sepia tone of the original print, so I got to here...

I think the black and white looks nicer in this instance, but I always like having options and this is the most faithful representation of how the photo originally looked.

But there is something else I have been playing around with lately. Photoshop has these experimental neural filters that use cloud processing to do various tricky enhancements. Most of them are in beta and they can be very quirky. But they have a colorizer that tries to detect people and things and adds color to them. Not every black and white photo is a good candidate. I have found these professional portrait photos work decently, but the filter is very hit-and-miss. And there are tools within the filter to help you make a miss more of a hit, but often I have to accept the photo isn't going to work.

But I decided to give it a shot with this one and surprisingly, the colorizer got me most of the way there.

I can work with that.

The one thing it does well is skin. Manually painting color onto skin is tricky and requires more skill and knowledge of traditional painting techniques than I have. But if a filter can do that part for me, I can do the rest.

So after my touchups, I got the image to here.

All I have left to do is my standard color enhancements to make them a little less ghostly and a little more human.

And I present to you where I started and the finished product. I encourage you to flip back and forth.

I'm not sure how, but I was able to go from an image I thought was impossible to edit to a beautiful colorized memory for my best friend's mom. I cannot wait to show her.

[tonixe]

"Oh Micheal..."

notes: I'm back and for real this time, school kicked my ass and I'll going to try to answer all the requests and publish all of them, sorry guys for not uploading xx.

PTS: HAPPY HALLOWEEN, MIGHT BE LATE OR EARLY.

warning: smut, p in the v, creampie, readers a virgin, non-con to semi-con, penetration, and BJ.

pairing: micheal myers x fem!reader

word counter: 2.2k

The old rusty clock, the arms of the clock moving to what you think is taking its sweet time. Laying down your head on your desk, looking at your friend who was sitting to the right of you, Laurie Strode. You guys knew it each other since middle school, and your moms are parents too which put some relations between you guys.

Finally, the bell rang as you got up took your books, and walked to Laurie who was just packing up like you, "Laurie, what are you doing on Halloween night?" I asked, putting my back on the side of my shoulder, and leaning down on her desk. "Im going to babysit Tommy today, he's my neighboorhood' kid, and they're going to be busy this Halloween," Laurie muttered before you guys started walking out of the classroom to the the hallway. It was usually loud during between periods, but it was the end of the day. -And it was Halloween, "So, what are you going to do this Halloween?" I heard Laurie mention, turning my head towards her realizing I virtually didn't have any plans this year, I was too old for trick or treating and I wasn't going to some dumb Halloween party being hosted.

"Hm, never thought about it before.." I said, looking down the hallway, it was pretty packed with people getting their stuff out of their locker. "Maybe I'll just hang out with you while you babysit, don't wanna be alone on Halloween" I exclaimed, "So.. you're just going to watch some Halloween movie with the kid and give him snacks and shit like that," I asked.

"Probably" She giggled, "maybe some jack o' lanterns if he's lucky," she said, we walked out of the school building, hearing Lynda screaming out names, as she got to us. She was heaving, leaning back, "Where the hell were you guys going?" She exclaimed, "Home" I looked at Laurie and we laughed together, "Come on guys" She groaned, and we walked down the pavement, to the street crossing to our high school.

Haddonfield was a quiet place until 1963, with a kid named Micheal who murdered his own sister, i heard of it everywhere. Different stories and various, it was cruel. I learned from it with my dad's old newspapers, with the letter bold of what the young elementary kid did. "HEY," We heard some yelling again, before Lynda lit her cigarette, smoking it. She turned her head, "It's Annie" She said, "You guys didn't wait for me at all" She yelled, "We did, like 15 minutes and you totally did show" Before we started walking again, Lynda and Annie sharing a cigarettes, as she shared what happen.

"Paul really dragged you to the locker room" I giggled, "Yeah, and he got grounded so he won't be coming over to mine tonight" She blew out the smoke from her lips. "Laurie whatcha thinking about?" I asked, "I forgot my chemistry book!" she groaned, rubbing her head. "So what! I forgot all my books, like my math book, chemistry, English, and more" Lynda started ranting, "Even my French book" She giggled. Before a car started driving across the road, grabbing Laurie's attention, I noticed looking at the direction she was looking at, "Isn't that Van Grahm?" Lynda said, "I don't think so.." Laurie whispered.

"I think he's cute" She smiled out, as we all watched the car drive before Annie said something, "Hey jerk! Speed kills!" She yelled before we noticed the car stopping in its tracks. My heart was beating fast against my chest, waiting for something to happen before it started driving.

"Phew" I muttered, "Sometimes Annie you're going to get us in some deep trouble," Laurie said.

"Totally," Lynda said. Before we all started walking down the pavement.

I was at Laurie's house sitting down on the couch, she was babysitting a kid named Tommy Doyle, and he was glued to the TV screen watching some kid Halloween movie, i was bored so I watched some of it.

I heard the doorbell ringing as I got up from the couch walking to the door, "I'll get it, Laurie!" Looking into the peephole, it was Annie and her little sister. I opened the door, "It's Annie and her sister" I yelled out, "I didn't know you were going to be here Annie" I said, "Yeah, just need my sister to be here, so I can go to Paul's place" She said, "I thought he was grounded?" I questioned, "he is but his parents are going to be out" She gave me a sneaky smile.

I and Annie were in the middle of a conversation after that Annie left to go back to her house, I put on some different Halloween movies as I walked to the kitchen with Laurie preparing the jack o' lanterns, "Those are so good jack o' later" I pointed at the pumpkins, "Thanks" she said, "Could you make some popcorn for Tommy and Lindsay?" She asked, "Sure" I took some of the microwave popcorn popping it into the microwave setting the timer, before leaning back on the counter.

"So this is how you're going to spend your whole Halloween" I asked, "Yeah, but it's a little fun" She confessed, "How is taking care of two brats fun?"

"I don't know maybe because I have something to do" She shrugged

We spoke until we heard yelling from Tommy, Me and Laurie ran to the living room, "Boogeyman!" He screamed before he grabbed our attention, I rushed to him, "Where?" I said, looking at the window he was pointing to, "Y/N, did you add anything?" she asked, as she held Lindsay, "Nope, nothing there Tommy" I said, "Oh, stop Tommy stop that, there no one there" Laurie said,

"Nobody believes me" Tommy muttered, "I do Tommy," Lindsay said, as they sat down on the couch. Some part of me believed what Tommy said, especially with all the mysterious things that were happening around Haddonfield, "Is there a boogeyman" I whispered looking through the blinds, before I stepped back and sat down on the sofa. A few minutes passed and I got stuck watching some random movie with the kids. The phone started ringing and Laurie got up to answer it, "Are you fooling around again?" she put her hand on her hips before her eye faltered, "I'll kill if this is a joke" I turned my head, "Annie" she repeated to the phone before she quickly put the phone back on the charge.

"Who called?" I asked, "Annie" she said, looking at the window before trying to call her again. "Hold on, could you watch them for me?"

"Sure," I said. A few minutes passed before I looked at the time, "Okay, guys it's time to go to bed" I said, "But it's so early" Tommy groaned, "Well, you guys should be up to date, now bed, now" I watched them as they got up the stairs going to a room, "Now, where the hell is Laurie" I whispered.

I watched some TV, waiting for her, almost falling asleep, I heard banging from the door, and Laurie screaming from behind, I quickly opened it as she shut the door behind her locking it and turning off the lights. Running the phone, putting in the policy number. Her clothes were ripped and she was scared, "Laurie, what happened?" I asked worriedly. She put down the phone, becoming more frantic. "Where's Tommy and Lindsay?"

"There sleeping, right now" I said, stretching my arms, "Laurie what the hell to you?" I pointed to her clothing. "Tommy was right, something is outside" she heaved pushing me down as she was down hiding behind the couch, before she saw a figure. There were armed with a bloody knife, I screamed, backing up before Laurie stabbed the intruder with a large crochet needle. "What the fuck" my eye widen, my heart pounding.

"Come" Laurie grabbed my hand, and we ran some else to the house, hiding from the intruder, "W-what is going on.." I whispered, "Be quiet" she whispered back. Hearing footsteps creeping, the hit didn't affect him. "I'll going to be right back," she said, quietly getting away from where you were, I was scared my heart to my chest.

I held my breath as he got closer, before I saw his knife beside me, I screamed before running up the stairs, my legs had never gone that fast before, I ran upstairs locking the door behind me, before I leaned back, a knife was inserted. As I screamed, crawling back further down. The shadow broke the door as I saw up and personal, he had a white mask with hair and was in a coverall.

"Please," I said, feeling tears on my cheeks, as I crawled back, "please, I won't tell anyone," I said, as he got closer to me his knife in hand, before stopping. I looked up at him, I couldn't see anything but the window did something showing his big shadow.

I felt my body trembling, as I breathed in. I didn't know what to do, looking at him. "What do you want.." I yelled, he didn't respond to me, blankly staring at me.

An idea came into my head and made me feel shameful for doing it but I crawled towards him and looked at him, he didn't lower his knife it seemed like he was frozen in the same position he had before.

My hands were on the waist part of his pants before I felt his hand grabbing mine, I was scared but he released them. Maybe what I had in my head was right, pulling his pants fully down. There was an evident bulge poking out. I held my breath, my thighs rubbing against each other, it was huge.

I had second thoughts of doing it but it looked like he wanted it.

Taking off his boxer revealing his cock sprang out, and the tip was red. I bit my lip, looking up at him, there wasn't a response just silence. Licked the pre-cum oozing out, looking up, he was just staring at me. I started taking him into my mouth, my jaw got tired, felt it hitting the back of my mouth, and it wasn't fully in. Tears on my waterline, before I felt some hands on the back of my head, shoving his dick into my mouth.

Some saliva dripped out of my mouth, breathing through my mouth. I heard his groans, as he kept face fucking me. I put my hands on his thighs, trying to stabilize before I felt hot loads going down my throat before he released his hands over me. I gasped, breathing. My salvia connects to the pink tip of his dick.

Rubbing my legs, feeling my cunt getting wetter, looking up at the intruder. It felt shameless that I was getting horny off of this, rubbing myself. Feeling his hands on me, he forcefully took off my panties underneath my skirt, flipping my skirt up and revealing my cunt. The cold air hitting it made me feel tense. I propped my elbows on the floor, "Wait, please!" I cried out, feeling a sharp pain inside of me, making my body jolt up.

I whimpered out in pain, feeling his large hands on my hips. Thrusting up into my g-stop, making me moan, turning my head. My walls spasming around his cock, his hips smacking into my pelvis, making my moans tremor. "F-fuck" I groaned.

My body jolted with every rhythmic smack to my pelvis. I didn't know why I enjoyed it, I should be in fear by now, but I'm just savoring every moment. Feeling a hot sensation in my lower core, feeling his cock hitting my stop, making me bend my back.

Before I saw a white flash in my eyes, a loud moan ripped out of my throat, I gripped the sheets beneath me. "P-please" I whispered, my eyes feeling heavy. He didn't stop, thrusting into me, making me bend in a sort of way. My skin felt sticky with sweat on my body, I breathed out and in. His rhythm getting sloppier, feeling his hand on my legs.

Lifting them, as he plunges into me, his groans getting louder. feeling him inside of me in parts I didn't know existed. Bending over in ecstasy. Before I felt hot loads inside of me, making me hot.

My chest rose slowly, my eyes looking at him lazily. "Please.." I whispered, his grip still on me. I felt his dick soften inside of me.

Feeling his grasp coming off me, I put my head down. My body feeling tired, and before I felt myself closing my eyes. The last thing I saw was the intruder leaving, I tried to get him but he disappeared.

the only thing I saw when I woke up was Laurie, she had a towel wrapped around my body, the police checking the house and a doctor, I think his name was Mr. Loomis was with us.

"What did he do to you" I heard Laurie whisper to me, I didn't say anything just look at the house, which soon filled with police officers. I felt something dripping down my leg, squeezing my leg. I remember the shameful thing I did with him, biting my lip.

[the-universal-sun]

Can we get some lil Ford hcs? This is my second time asking very politely and as a fren for smthn ik :3

Yes of course I can do more regressed Ford! I love him so much! He’s just such a little guy, you know? He needs so much love, and by golly I’ll make sure he gets it!

( @yourfavoritecuntist)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

-I mentioned this before, but when regressed, he’s down to around the range of 6-10, sometimes a little younger if he needs it

-He stubborn at times, especially if he’s working on a project, so he’ll refuse to accept that maybe he needs some Little Time. He’s short tempered and grouchy, and it’s not until he’s sobbing and on the verge of a melt down because the milk spilled a little on the counter that he admits that maybe he needs to regress for a little bit

-If Stan’s his caretaker, he’ll get Ford those math practice workbooks, which Ford can still do easily when regressed. He just likes the simplicity of it, plus he doesn’t like to do how’s advanced equations when he’s feeling little.

-Sometimes he’ll ask Stan to time him on a page to see how fast he can complete it. Stan doesn’t check his work because he knows Ford got the problems right, but he makes a sure of it, writing a “100” at the top of the page and putting a sticker on it. Ford’s always so happy when that happens

-If Fiddleford is his caretaker, he’ll write down pages of math problems himself, making sure to stay within the realm of what a child could feasibly solve, he’d hate to accidentally take Ford out of his regression by including advanced calculus (this has happened)

-Fidds does actually check over Ford’s work, of course he got them all right, and will give Ford a fancy jelly bean for getting them all right. It used to be a jelly bean per right answer, but Ford would get too hyper after all that candy and wouldn’t go down for a nap, meaning Fidds had a cranky and tired little with a sugar high to deal with. That was a lesson learned quickly

-Ford calls Stan his “Buddy” because Stan is Ford’s buddy! It’s also a casual and affectionate way to refer to a family member back when they were growing up. Stan will teasingly call Ford “Buddy” back sometimes too, and Ford loves it! Him and Stan are Buddies!

-Fidds is just “F” but in that long drawn out way kids will sometimes do. Like “eeeefffffff” you know? Fidds thinks it’s hilarious that he does that, which means Ford keeps doing it just because he’s getting praised by doing it

-Ford has Dr Mittens, his polydactyl cat thag Stan lovingly hand stitched for him, but Stan’s also got him a couple of other plushies, just so he has his choice: Dr Mittens, an Octopus, a BigFoot, and a Mothman. Dr Mittens is, of course, his favorite, but he’ll sleep with all four on the occasion, he loves a plushy pile

-I’ve mentioned this before, by little Ford is hyper and energetic, he’ll run around and talk for hours on end until he crashes during nap time. It’s even worse if he’s had sugar, which doubles his energy and somehow the speed of his talking. His jelly bean intake is strictly limited when little

-I like to head cannon that Ford hates his vegetables. Sometimes the texture is off for him, sometimes it’s the flavor, and sometimes it’s the smell. But Stan and Fidds can get him to eat them about 60% of the time. Stan because he grew up with Ford, he knows how to cook and season them so the smell, flavor, and texture agree with him enough to stomach it. Fiddleford because he has a picky 6 year old, so he’s learned the tricks to getting a fussy little one to eat his leafy greens

-He has a weighted blanket with different constellations printed on the fabric. He needs lots of pressure, so it’s about a 50 pounder

-He has a designated spot for naps and this can’t nap anywhere else, and trust him, he’s tried. His body will not let him physically nap until he’s in his cozy fort in the corner of his room, filled with pillows and soft blankets. Dr Mittens has to be in his arms with his own blanket so he can nap, too

-He needs more than parallel play, he almost always to be actively involved in playing if someone’s there and doing an activity near him. If Dipper’s playing DDMD, Ford is right there with him, if Mabel and Dipper are playing a board game, so is Ford. Stan’s dealing out cards for everybody? Deal some out for Ford, please. He likes playing with others, having people to talk to without judgement and bullying, something he didn’t get a lot of in his youth. And of course he’s more than welcome to play, nobody is going to judge him for being little, Stan’s his caretaker, the twins love their Grunkle and love playing with him, Wendy’s just that chill, and Soos is writing fanfiction based off of these interactions. The warm and ready acceptance makes Ford feel so warm and fuzzy inside

-Sometimes he has bad days, where noises and feelings, and memories, and textures are too much for him, but his family will be right there with him, soothing and easing him, trying their best to keep him calm and even. Even if he has a meltdown or a tantrum, no one’s getting mad at him. He’ll be calmed and wrapped up with a fuzzy blanket underneath his weighted blanket, the light turned low and Stan or Fidds right there with him, so he knows he’s not alone or in trouble

-He’s so soft when Little, so happy and free, just a cute little who needs so much love and a little patience. And he gets more than enough love and a whole lot of patience. He’s just so loved that sometimes he’ll cry from the good, but overwhelming feelings

-He’s just so happy :,)

[cackled0g]

Assorted headcanons about the L4D2 Survivors

Nick

-Heavy smoker, used to be a heavy drinker but I think by the point the apocalypse happens he's eased back on the drinking.

-Aside from being skilled at gambling and conning people, I think he's also got a talent for sleight-of-hand tricks and picking pockets. He knows a few basic card tricks too, though he never really gets a chance to show them off.

-Had a really rough childhood. Think both of his parents were junkies who spent most of their time ignoring him. He left home young and never looked back.

-This man was definitely raised Catholic

Rochelle

-Used to smoke, quit at some point. The apocalypse is bad for sobriety, so I feel like she occasionally shares a smoke with Nick.

-Had a large family in which she was a middle child. Spent most of her childhood being looked over in favor of her siblings. Put herself through college and worked up to being a producer for the news through sheer hard work and dedication.

-Has a bad habit of dating shitty men. She likes bad boys but tends to get attached to toxic personalities.

-Definitely the most intelligent of the L4D2 survivors.

Coach

-Never smokes or drinks--his vice is fast food.

-Was a popular football star for his school with ambitions of going pro. Had a knee injury late in his last season of high school football that ruined all of that. He became a Coach partially because of his love for the game and partially because he wanted to do a better job of protecting his students than his teachers did for him.

-Had a nice suburban childhood with loving parents. He's intensely worried about how they're faring in the apocalypse.

-Deeply cares about everyone, but especially kids. He knew all of the students at his school by name and always made a habit of being nice to those who looked like they needed it. I imagine he's seen several of them dead by now.

Ellis

-Tobacco fiend but not a smoker, this is a man who dips if I've ever seen one.

-Absent father, doting single mother. Never had any siblings but Keith was over enough to basically be raised alongside him. He never had to worry about his mother's affection for him; she clearly thinks he hung the moon.

-Very aware that he annoys people at times but unsure of how to stop doing it. Blames himself for his father leaving.

-ADHD and dyslexic. Did poorly in school but thrives in an environment where he can work with his hands and have verbal instructions. Math was his best core subject, and he excelled at ag and shop class.

-A Southern Baptist by blood, but I don't think he's ever given his personal religious beliefs much thought.

-Bisexual!

[edusquaremaths]

Multiplication with 11 Part-3 | Multiplication Tricks | Maths Tricks | Vedic Maths #mathtricks

Multiplication Tricks | Maths Tricks | Vedic Maths| Multiplication with 11Cool tricks by @EduSqaureMathsMultiplication Tricks | Maths Tricks | Vedic Mathsshorts #short #shortvideo #mathsedusquaremaths

[e-rated-beardo]

Scorn and the Saint-Maker, chapter 29: Unravelling fast, it’s true

Scorn and the Saint-Maker is a murder mystery/ineffable husbands romance/who-turned-them-human Good Omens fanfic, set at a university in Scotland, with lots of (as-yet skippable) level-5 smut, ✨sexy maths✨ (reportedly), and one trans angel

Chapter 29 summary: Fell gets back home. Crowley calls in sick, which in itself is cause for worry.

Rating: Chapter rated M for heavy topics. Fic rated E for skippable smut.

Warnings: Chapter has several warnings, including heavy drinking/alcoholism, depressive spirals, SH and (arguably) SI - please see chapter notes, and take care of yourself.

Excerpt:

There is a particular flavour of guilt that a certain type of person might get from avoiding facing something initially only mildly uncomfortable – playing truant from a class you normally enjoy, for example; then, not knowing how to apologise to a teacher you respect, skipping the next class as well, and the next, and the next – it’s a guilt which is liable to make itself worse by tricking one into evading the very answer to the problem, until the problem has grown large enough that the original solution – the simple apology – is no longer sufficient. At that point, a certain type of person may begin to convince themselves that the slighted party – the teacher, in our example – wouldn’t want their excuses, anyway. Anthony J. Crowley wasn’t familiar with this experience. At all. Nope. He was angry; that was the sum total of it. Guilt and other banalities had nothing to do with leaving Angel on ‘read’ (or ‘unread’), nor did the fact that anger had always been an amazing duct tape to cover more unpleasant emotions. He made a few more pit stops on the way.

Read chapter 29 on AO3 ➡️ or start from the beginning ↩️ (127k words, WIP)

@goodomensafterdark

[more-sonorous]

Hey! Hope everything is alright, we lost power lol- but uhh... Race head cannons? (I am sososo normal 😚) Good morning/day/night! 💜

hi, katz! thankfully the dorms still have power so i'm grateful to be bored out of my mind with internet access loll

race headcanons, let's do it!

his name is edward anthony higgins (which is partially real life canon and partially a nod to fanon) and he despises being called ed or any version of his first name (father's name). he's okay with tony or anthony, though.

i base my race off of livesies and 92sies (with a bit of uksies). his looks lean more towards ben cook and his personality is a mix of mostly max casella and a bit of josh barnett. sarcastic. fast-talking. impish little prankster. sorta mean and rough around the edges. big joker. ugh i just adore tough guy race and will always write him as such.

strong. (you've all seen ben cook's incredible biceps, need i explain?)

i adore the smart race headcanon. dk where it came from but i lovingly adopted it in both canon and modern

albert's his best friend in every universe

he and crutchie and jack are thick as thieves in every universe, caught somewhere between brothers and best friends

specifically canon era

got his nickname from selling out at the tracks in brooklyn, which i think is just plain canon but you can never be sure in this fandom

part irish (father) part english (mother), but he's born on u.s soil.

father is almost definitely 100% involved in gangs like the dead rabbits and the whyos

mother is dead oops

four older half-siblings (oops i think dad got around), two brothers two sisters, doesn't keep in touch with most of them but contacts occasionally as a last resort

manhattan's official second in command, takes over in jack's place when jack ages out. probably is not the next president of the newsboy union, but the next treasurer

related to the last one, the boy is excellent with numbers. very smart but just never had the opportunity to develop those skills. when davey starts school again, he offers to give race arithmetic lessons. when he realizes that race is better at arithmetic than he is, it turns into race helping davey do math homework.

two years younger than jack

became a newsie when he was around ten

misses his mom

knows he's smarter than most of these schmucks, so he's constantly running and winning card games/poker games/betting rings to trick people out of money. it's how he gets his mental stimulation, much to jack's annoyance (how else is he supposed to get extra cash for his expensive habits, jack?)

tobacco addiction oops

specifically modern era

got his nickname from being good at running, unironically. either he did track and field or he picked up the nickname from foster home shenanigans-- i pick my poison based on the au

absolute vape demon to the chagrin of all his friends.

foster system kid! mother is still dead and father was definitely involved in seedy criminal activities, currently in prison

still has all of those older half-siblings but... they do not get along, so his lil ass ended up in foster care at ten years old

misses his mom

still a certified genius when it comes to math and science, but he could care less about whatever else there is. he and davey make great study buddies because they excel where the other falters. they also make good tutors for jack, who needs a little assistance in all subjects that don't involve art or pe

i love making him a dancer in universes where that is financially possible, because here you've got this fast-talking witty tough guy that can whip out ten pirouettes in a row and flip across the room and still get up in your face-- then he still says 'and what about it?' and will beat your ass if you answer wrong

biggest case of gifted kid burnout you ever saw

could compete for valedictorian if he wanted to but he only tries in the subjects he has fun learning about

chronic procrastinator

because of the above, addicted to energy drinks as well. will probably need a kidney stone removed at some point in his life.

chews on the silver part of his pencils like the goblin he is

when someone (probably davey) tries to put him onto mechanical pencils, he snaps off the little plastic pocket clip and chews on that instead

augh thank you so much for the ask! i had so much fun answering <3

[foundnthestars]

For the things we lost au, has there ever been times where Stan tells stories to Dipper to calm him down after a traumatic experience or just before bed or just in general?

I know currently Dipper’s and Stan’s relationship hasn’t gotten to that point yet but I’m curious!

Also what other tricks besides teaching Dipper how to use a gun and stealing does Stan ingrain in Dipper? Does he teach him all the tricks he knew from his days of the street?

And since Dipper’s still growing does Stan teach Dipper how to conserve their money, how to shave, how to barter with people/ being okay with talking with crowds or how to do certain math problems (because Stan has worked on the portal for a long time you can’t tell me that he didn’t pick up some things even if begrudgingly)

Does Stan teach Dipper all of his best Uncle Jokes/funny stories, and despite saying he (Dipper) hates all of them does Dipper secretly appreciate them ever once in a while?

Does Dipper help Stan with stuff too? Like does Dipper learn to read different Alien languages just so he can help Stan read stuff or does he steal a little bit of extra food because he knows if Stan doesn’t get enough for the both of them, all that food will be put towards him sl Dipper gets more to help Stan?

I know that Dipper had helped Stan with his hearing aids but what other things does he do for Stan?

DO DIPPER AND STANLEY EVENTUALLY GET A PIRATE ADVENTURE?! Please say they get a space pirate adventure!!!

Also do both Stan and Dipper pick on some alien languages because with Stanley picking up Spanish and Dipper’s interest in learning new languages I don’t think it would be too much of a stretch for them to learn

wow, HELLO! :) you literally made my entire morning when i had to peel myself out of bed at 5am to make it to my shift, and i've been thinking about these asks like all day. thank you anon!!! thank you for giving me an opportunity to rant about this wonderful, beautiful, tragic au. i'm so glad you're enjoying it!!

first off, yes, 100%. there's actually quite a bit of that in the next chapter. as dipper's walls begin to come down and his anger toward stan slowly but surely ebbs away, so too will stan's walls. in canon, stan doesn't share really any of his childhood (at least from what we see) with the kids until atots. in ttwl, it's implied that stan tells dipper more or less the same story we got in that episode (just minus ford's perspective/part of the story), but he will be sharing a lot more of his backstory, life advice, and stories with dipper as the fic progresses. this will help dipper understand stan's motives and will help move the healing process along for them. a lot, if not most, of dipper's anger toward stan is just resentment for being left in the dark (dipper famously hates not knowing stuff). and stan wants so badly to regain dipper's trust. he also wants to protect him from the things he feels he's failed him on this summer already (read: bill). 100% we will see stan rambling about this or that or this to a traumatized and or terrified dipper just to keep him out of his own head and to reinforce in the kid's head that he has someone beside him that he can trust.

side note: stan (and ford's) struggle will be in trying to maintain the kids' childhood and trying not too force them to grow up too fast. but they aren't perfect people and the circumstances are obviously awful and not conducive to helping maintain the kids' innocence. they'll fail and fuck up and they'll get some things right, too. but i can definitely see stan trying to lighten the mood/share stories as i can see ford taking mabel on light-hearted, low stakes adventures when things with the portal become too intense and her mental health begins to fall by the wayside.

SECOND, there's so many things stan will teach dipper! but, i'm willing to bet that stan didn't exactly take the best care of himself during those years he spent on the road. so there will be a lot of things he will have to learn himself! like, where stan spent weeks and weeks skipping meals because he had to, he can't stand seeing dipper do the same. he won't allow it. he'll have to push himself even harder to make ends meet than he did during those years. he wants better for dipper.

as for the things he teaches dip, i'll just list some of them out. you'll definitely see these things play out in ttwl but this question is fun and it's a fun sneak-peak:

stealing (pickpocketing and petty theft both)

how to put on a half-way decent con (in journal 3, ford mentions having to talk his way into food and shelter, and stan and dipper will 100% have to do the same. i imagine he'll actually catch on pretty quick but he'll absolutely hate doing it.)

how to read a face (i.e. is this person full of shit. everyone knows a good con man can spot a con right back)

how to drive (later)

how to shave DEFINITELY. dipper will start growing a little stache or goatee and stan will practically shove a razor in his direction the second it starts coming in.

how to be a ladies man (they'd have their roadside attraction arc and dip would learn basically that confidence is in himself and not in stan's fake womanizing "skills")

things dipper should be learning in school. stan clearly wasn't at the top of his class but you're right in saying that he learned a lot of things when he was building the portal. and dipper's a curious kid, they'll both seek out ways to help him keep on his education in some shape or form.

life experience/advice/etc. stan has 58 some years of life under his belt and he'll share whatever wisdom he has. can't promise all of it will be good lol

there's definitely more that's slipping my mind at the moment, but yes to all of these. and yes to the horrible uncle jokes. none of that stops. and once dipper starts being able to bear him a bit more, he'll secretly love hearing them. he'll love them for the normalcy they help him feel and because if stan is able to laugh and make jokes then maybe everything will be okay. maybe it's okay for him to laugh too, even if everything is so shitty.

as for reading alien languages, there's actually some plot explanations regarding translators that will be explored next chapter. as a resident guardians of the galaxy fic writer, i know all about writing about sci-fi translators and the like. i'm keeping the same explanation for how translators work in this fic too. meaning, dipper and stan will be able to read most alien languages really soon. though, because i like the idea of stan and dipper being able to speak some of the languages they learned during their time across the portal when they get home, they'll probably still try learning some alien languages without the need for translators. i imagine they'll get home and just start speaking, i don't know, like Galactic Standard with each other and ford will pop in and chime into the conversation without missing a beat and mabel will just be standing there wide-eyed and entirely lost for words.

AND YEAH. dipper will do lots of things for stan! besides the unintentional things that dipper does that he doesn't know about — like giving stan a reason to get up in the morning and filling him with happiness and purpose — he'll do his best to reciprocate favors! like, 100% if dipper noticed stan was skipping meals so he could eat more he'd steal something on the side for stan or lie and say he isn't hungry. they'd also both do little things for each other like steal or buy little trinkets or items the other person might like. stan'll buy dipper a notebook to chronicle their adventures and dipper will steal these chocolates he knows stan likes or a funny little doodad or whatever. maybe a gun or a knife if he's feeling crazy.

dipper will also sacrifice his own sleep a lot in order to take watch. the kid's an insomniac already, and stan is older and needs more sleep to recover from brawls with giant alien creatures or running from the law, so dip will do a lot of selfless things like that for stan. both of these guys tend not to think of themselves much so they'll probably both try to sacrifice stuff equally as much. of course, stan wont really let dipper most of the time.

and, i'm not opposed to a space pirate adventure. inquiring minds want to know more.

[kerizaret]

I have a hc that Saki picked up A LOT of various skills or knowledge while at the hospital that was just fun or distracting and a way for her to spend the days there and not be bored. Some of these are useful things, but others are just... completely random

Sure, she might've not had a chance to learn how to cook... But she can knit really well instead! The grandmas she met at the hospital were a huge help. All of l/n have at least one sweater hand knitted by her

Math was hard to learn when you didn't attend school a lot, but she found she's picked up learning languages a lot easier! So, she's been learning some by herself. She's really good at English and knows some Chinese too. She's even managed to pick up a little French because she thought it's classy. She's watched a lot of videos and movies and dramas or donghuas in original languages, and regularly listens to an English podcast on fashion. She ends up helping an embarrassed but very grateful Tsukasa with his broken English a lot later on, too, because she cannot listen to him. She's also practiced a lot of tongue-twisters which she can say really fast now, in all Japanese, Chinese and English

Also, sign language! She's learnt some basics of JSL

Obviously she's been following the trends a lot to see what's popular to wear right now, but then she got dragged into the hole that is fashion history... Now she can accurately describe you from memory what was commonly worn by any social class in various eras in Japan and also some in France (it's known as the country of fashion, after all! It's also part of the reason of her picking that language to learn), and knows the biographies of a lot of important fashion figures

She can fold very complicated origami deisgns by heart and also do miniature origami models. She's got boxes full of old origami sculptures(?) shes made over the years. She's also given a lot of them away to other patients when they were upset or when some were leaving the hospital, and also gifted some to all her doctors when she was finally discharged herself

She's TRIED to learn lockpicking, but the doctors once caught her sneaking out at night trying to pick at some medicine cabinet to practice and the conversation following it was so awkward that she didn't try it again...

She knows a lot about flower language (thanks to Ichika. They discussed that a lot whenever she came to visit her and brought a new bouquet in tow). She can solve a Rubik's cube in under a minute and shuffle cards really quick, too. She even knows a few card tricks. She can twirl a pen, which she later does A LOT in class, quote several poems from memory. She's learnt to write basic calligraphy

Because y'know, sometimes you need to do something new and/or time/thought–consuming to distract yourself from the bad and painful stuff. And in the end it's still something she can use now and be proud of and that she can share to make others happy, too. And just have fun