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spicysix · 2 years ago

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I'll be with you, when the roses bloom again

cheerscoops week - day two prompt: childhood friends to lovers/soulmate AU

rating: T warnings: no Upside Down, soulmate AU, childhood friends to lovers, temporary character death, panic attack, mention of drugs, oblivious steve, toxic stomarol, angst with a happy ending word cont: 4.3k

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Soulmates weren’t there when you were born. That was a fairytale, a romanticized version of it all, told so all the kids would grow up thinking life was all love and flowers.

It wasn’t.

Soulmates could be a bad thing. People you were destined to meet, no matter if their impact on your life would be good or bad. They would leave a mark, whether you wanted it or not.

You weren’t born with it. You had to earn it, take it, have it beaten into you.

It happened when it happened.

Steve had four for Tommy and Carol. One for each, for when they met, beautiful blooming flowers on his left shoulder. And one for each, for when they left him, putrid rotting weeds on his right shoulder. They had changed his life, back when he had just moved in to the house closer to Carol’s and she introduced him to that freckled little boy from the block down. And they had changed his life when they decided he wasn’t good enough for them anymore, or bad enough if you look closely into it. They had changed his life a thousand times in between those two, and Steve was glad his soulmarks for them were on his back, because if he had to see them every day instead of only when he purposefully turned his back to a mirror and looked over his shoulder, he thinks he wouldn’t bare how much he missed them sometimes.

He had a poisonous ivy leaf hidden by his hair and by the scar where Billy had broken a plate on his head. The biggest reason he still maintained his hair as long and coiffed as he did.

He had another blooming one on his left hand for when he fell in love with Nancy, and another dying one on his right for when she told him her love for him wasn’t real. He had another one, though, a secret third one right where his clavicle bones met, in the center of his chest, a fully bloomed flower in all her glory. One that appeared during the night after they talked the whole day, meeting their common grounds and finally understanding what went wrong and what didn’t, where they did right and where they failed on each other. After they could finally heal from their heartbreaks, and find a friend on one another — not as close as they were before, but a different kind of strong friendship anyway because Steve wasn’t Steve without Nancy and Nancy wasn’t Nancy without Steve.

The biggest one just under his heart for when Robin poured her heart out to him on dirty bathroom floors; and that was the first time he was grateful for a mark. He wished it had appeared somewhere in his body that he could show to everyone, so the whole world would know that he had many failed soulmates, but the successful one was the best he could ever ask for. He had a tiny one around the big main one for every little special time they shared, for every new revelation, for every new secret, for every time his soul felt happy and complete because he had Robin next to him.

The house next to Carol’s had a family that Carol hated. She used to say they were too perfect, all doll-looking, blonde hairs and blue eyes and skinny physiques.

Steve didn’t told Carol at first when he’d hang out with the girl she hated from time to time.

It started one day as he was leaving Carol’s house and, as always, he passed in front of the Cunningham’s home. The doll-looking, blonde-haired, blue-eyed skinny girl was collecting dandelions from her front lawn. Steve was eleven, she was ten, and that was the first time he thought he’d get an immediate soulmark and was left frustrated.

He looked at Carol’s house, glad to see she had walked back inside it already, and carefully approached the girl. A leaf crunching under his sneaker alerted her of his presence.

Blue eyes met Steve's.

“Hi?” she asked. Her voice was soothing, calm, a beautiful sound, a strike contrast to Carol’s shrieks. No wonder she hated her.

“Steve,” he answered dumbfounded. Her front teeth were charmingly crooked, he noticed when she smiled at him. “Me! I’m Steve.”

“Chrissy, me, I’m Chrissy,” she answered giggling and Steve couldn’t help but laugh back.

They just stared at each other for a while, Steve could feel his face burning and knew he was probably more red than the shoes she was wearing. Her hair tied into pigtails, and the whole image reminded him of Dorothy. He wanted to say more, but couldn’t find his voice.

After what felt like hours, he just pointed to a random spot to his left, waved way too fast and started walking. He heard her laugh as he kept going further away, and that kept the smile glued to his face, even through the embarrassment of not saying anything else.

He just left like a coward lion.

But he was there again a couple of days later, going home from Carol’s house, and she had green shoes this time as she was having what looked like a tea party with her stuffed animals. There was a lion amongst them.

“His name is Theo,” she said when she noticed Steve’s fixated stare on the stuffed cat.

“Theo, the lion,” he whispered back and she nodded.

His feet took him closer without him noticing, and he spared a look to Carol’s door. It was closed, she was back inside. It was safe.

“Steve, you, Steve. Hi!” Chrissy greeted him, that crooked smile that triggered Steve’s own lips to curl upwards.

“Hi, Chrissy… sorry about that… got nervous.” He shrugged.

“No need to be nervous. Do you want tea?” she asked, pointing at the (probably empty) tea pot.

“Uh… sure, yeah!” Steve answered. Chrissy’s smile widened, Steve’s smile widened and the world felt more colorful.

That was all it took.

Every few days, Steve would stop and play or chat or pick flowers with Chrissy on his way home from Carol’s. He would always look at the Perkins’ door to see if it was closed, and he would always ease up at Chrissy’s sweet voice, and he would always finally go back to his house feeling like he was stepping on clouds.

The Summer ended, the school started, he’d see Chrissy every day across the hallways and when Carol finally spotted him waving at the blonde girl, she threw a hissy fit. Steve talked her down, convinced her Carol was still his best girl friend, Chrissy wouldn’t replace her nor her blooming flowers in his left shoulder, and it worked. Carol wouldn’t talk to Chrissy, not ever, but she tried to hide her scowl when Steve did. Tommy just laughed whenever Carol complained, but he would also refuse to allow Chrissy into their closed group, and that was all very annoying in an endearing way to Steve. Or, endearing, in an annoying way. He couldn’t pick.

All the years kept passing, and in between fancy family trips and weeks being left alone the older he got, Steve learned how to keep his friends as close as possible so the soul-crushing weight of loneliness wouldn’t smash him to the floor whenever he woke up to an empty house. He could keep them all, Carol and Tommy and Chrissy, but as the years went by and he grew older and the hormones started working and the voice in his head — that sounded just like his father — spoke louder, three of them didn’t feel like enough.

Steve threw a party or two, but then he’d be the one to clean the house after it, so he resigned to just attend other people’s parties. He’d bring Carol and Tommy with him, always, but Chrissy wasn’t allowed yet, and he knew she wouldn’t enjoy them either.

It was like he was two different people.

He was Steve Harrington, keg stand king, someone the whole High School student body somehow looked up to. He got bitchier around Carol and Tommy, he even got meaner sometimes, but everyone around him laughed when he got that way so it was fine.

And he was Steve. Around her, he was just Steve. He got gentler, softer even, around Chrissy, and he got silly sometimes but she laughed with him and not at him when he did so it was fine. If he liked who he was with Tommy and Carol, he loved who he was with Chrissy. He’d teach her basketball, and she’d teach him collages, and they’d watch terribly produced musicals together, and bake delicious brownies that no one else got to taste because it was theirs. It was a little colorful world and it was only theirs.

He didn’t have a problem, exactly, that those two sides of him were so contrasting. He kind of liked being both. He loved Carol and Tommy, more than anyone, and he also loved that he got to keep a side that only Chrissy got to see.

Then came Nancy.

She changed everything.

She changed him, or he changed himself after her, and he was grateful for it. But in the same way Carol and Tommy tolerated Chrissy, they despised Nancy. Maybe because they saw, before anyone else including herself, that Nancy had a sharp edge under her softness. That she was bark and bite, that she wouldn’t take Carol and Tommy’s shit without fighting back if she had to.

And she had to.

It wasn’t a “her or us” situation, they didn’t put it like that, but Steve chose Nancy anyway. He chose who he was around her, the softness before only reserved to Chrissy that now Steve felt like he didn’t have to hide, and the eagerness to protect through sometimes mean words when necessary — not with fists, not like Tommy, never with fists. Nancy got along well with Chrissy too, and Steve liked it better now when he didn’t have to split himself into two. He could be just one, just Steve.

The blossoms on his shoulder rotted.

A new one bloomed on his hand.

Chrissy still didn’t have a flower of her own, and it never ceased to confuse Steve.

As fast as Nancy came, though, she went. A hurricane of changes, a storm turning his life around, a whole new Steve left behind and he couldn’t and he wouldn’t keep a grudge. They were just kids. They could figure it out later. They did, eventually.

The blossom on his hand died anyway.

Chrissy still didn’t have a flower of her own, and even if she and Steve’s paths weren’t crossing as much anymore for some reason after his and Nancy’s break-up, it was still confusing.

Steve graduated, no more seeing Chrissy every day across the hallways, no more stopping by her house beside Carol’s, daily phone calls turned into weekly ones, into monthly ones, into no phone calls at all until Chrissy still had no flowers and Steve missed her every day and had no mark to stare at in the mirror to torture himself.

But suddenly Steve had Robin, and he had Dustin, and he had Max. He got to keep them all, be just Steve, and he didn’t need any more. It was enough.

Chrissy had no one, and so she turned to Eddie Munson.

Robin called him at work, anxious to gossip about the Queen of Hawking High making a drug deal with The Freak, and Steve was immediately confused because, when had Chrissy become the Queen of Hawkins High, and why was she after drugs?

His head burned with it through the whole day, nothing good could be the cause of that, and the guilt eating up at his insides for being so estranged to Chrissy that he didn’t even know what could possibly be so bad in her life that she’d resort to drugs to fix it. He tried to rationalize his way through it, remembered Munson didn’t sell a lot of hard stuff, he was mostly a weed guy — god knows how much money Steve himself spent with Munson for party supplies, maybe Chrissy just wanted to relax a bit? Yeah, that should be it, no way it was anything stronger. She wouldn’t need that. She wouldn’t go there.

Steve had a date with Hailey, or Lauren, or whoever to the Pep Rally, and Chrissy looked just fine cheering through it, but he couldn’t keep his eyes off her. Lucas scored the winning points, Robin scored a laugh from her crush, Steve scored a “this was nice but we should keep it as friends” from Holly/Letty/whoever.

And he told Robin he’d wait at the parking lot while she got out of her band clothes, and he basically ran to it just in time to see Munson and the rest of Hellfire leaving the school main building, but his eyes didn’t linger on their commemorations before finding Chrissy — subtly hidden by the shadows, but still visible waiting next to Munson’s van.

His feet took him closer without him noticing.

“Chris?” his voice scared her, wide blue eyes immediately finding his, no softness there, and he held his arms up in a non-threatening stance. “Sorry. Are you… How are you?”

She had a frown, her charmingly crooked teeth worrying at her bottom lip, unsure eyes searching for something in him because of course she didn’t trust him anymore. She had no reason to.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” he pleaded, a wave of many bad feelings running him over. He took a small step towards her, and then another, and he could see her fidgety fingers over her stomach. “I wasn’t a good friend, I-”

She interrupted him, “Can we not do this right now?” she asked, looking at something behind Steve’s shoulder. “Can we not do this today?” Her voice was still soft though, still trying to soothe him even if he didn’t deserve it.

He couldn’t help but look behind him, Eddie Munson standing from a safe distance, crossed arms, crooked eyebrow, waiting attentively. Steve let out a sigh.

“Can I call you tomorrow?” he asked, and she only nodded before looking back at Munson again.

Steve didn’t turn to see, but he listened as Munson walked around the van to the driver’s side, and watched as Chrissy stepped into the passenger side. He walked backwards, out of the van’s way and didn’t look away as Munson drove off. To his trailer, probably. To sell Chrissy drugs.

A hand on his shoulder startled him.

“Good to go?” Robin asked, a knowing look on her face that had Steve aware they’d have a sleepover, because he had a long story to tell her.

Steve woke up in the middle of the night with his phone loudly ringing and a burn in his chest.

“What the fuck?” Robin grumbled from beside him in the bed as he got up and ran to the corridor to answer the phone.

No good could come from a call that late into the night.

“Hello?” he answered, breath short, chest tight already.

“Steve… It’s Chrissy,” Max’s voice was watery on the other side of the line, and it took Steve a while to make the connection.

Max lived in the trailer park.

The same trailer park as Munson. She lived right across Munson’s trailer, actually.

Munson, who was supposed to sell drugs to Chrissy that night. Who took her, in his van, to his trailer, to sell her some kind of drug.

Steve’s heart was beating way too fast and it was burning and he didn’t know if he had answered anything to Max before he glanced down to his shirtless torso and stared at the right side of his chest.

A dead flower.

Not dying, not rotting.

A dead flower.

His soulmate had died.

Chrissy finally marked his skin with her own flower, a rose nonetheless, and it was dead.

Chrissy was dead.

A ringing in his ears.

His vision was blurry.

Was someone talking to him?

His chest felt tight.

It burned, his skin, but underneath it too. It felt constricted.

Was someone talking to him?

Sharp pain on the skin of his tights. Sharp like nails. Maybe his own.

Was someone talking to him?

A single drop of sweat running down his back.

A single drop of a tear running down his cheek.

“Steve!” Robin was talking to him. “Steve, you gotta breathe, please!”

Her hand was on his cheek, not the wet one.

His blurry vision went up her torso. He could see his flower across her left ribcage, under the top she was wearing as pajamas. His blurry vision went up her face. Blue eyes met his.

Blue eyes.

His vision went clear.

“Robin!” he gripped her wrist. It must’ve hurt her. “Robin, Chrissy, she-”

“Steve, listen to me!” Robin was crouching, but she dropped to her knees on the floor and didn’t care about Steve’s grip on her wrist. She kept holding his face, and her other hand went to his chest. His burning chest. “Steve, listen. You’re having a panic attack, you need to breathe.”

“But Chrissy-”

“Steve, in and out, come on,” she instructed him through it, breathed slowly in and exhaled slowly out with him.

Steve wanted to scream at her, Chrissy’s dead! But he had no voice, and no air in his lungs to do so.

He breathed slowly in and exhaled slowly out until his vision wasn’t blurry, until he wasn’t ripping his skin open with his fingernails, until he wasn’t gripping Robin’s wrist so tight. Her hands were still on his face and his chest. She was caressing him with her thumbs.

“There you are,” she whispered, a smile trying to fight its way to her lips. “Steve, you saw the dead soulmark and had a panic attack. I talked as fast as I could to Max before rushing to calm you down, she explained it. Chrissy’s in the hospital.”

The words made no sense.

“No, but, but- You said it yourself, dead soulmark Robin, how-”

“Steve.” He stopped talking at her stern tone. It was grounding. “Let’s get to the hospital.”

“You can’t drive,” he reminded her and she had that soft smile for him in response.

Soft, soft, soft. Always soft for him.

“Nancy’s here.” She nodded behind her.

Only then Steve saw his ex-girlfriend standing in the middle of the corridor, a worried look on her face, Jonathan next to her obviously not aware of anything that was happening. But they were there anyway. Steve still had them.

Chrissy had no one, she had no one but a drug dealer-

“Hey, no spiraling again.” Robin turned his face back to her, she knew him so well. “Let’s get to the hospital.”

Steve felt numb. He felt numb as Jonathan helped Robin get him to his feet, he felt numb as Robin dragged him to his bedroom to get dressed, numb through the car ride in Nancy’s station wagon, numb as they walked through Hawkins General’s doors.

Numb as Robin talked to Chrissy’s parents, numb as Nancy and Jonathan talked to Munson, numb even as Max came to give him one of her rare hugs.

“I’m sorry I scared you,” she said, muffled sobs against his shirt.

“It wasn’t you, Mad Max,” he answered numbly. “I promise it wasn’t you.”

His chest still burned.

Steve had to sit numbly in the chair next to Munson, and when Robin noticed he was about to jump him and resort to Tommy’s old ways of resolving things, she sat between them.

“It wasn’t his fault,” she whispered. “Chrissy didn’t take anything.”

Steve numbly growled in response.

He had to numbly wait there, Robin by his side and Munson by hers, even after Nancy and Jonathan took Max home, even after Chrissy’s dad went to work, even after Chrissy’s mom went back to the house to get a shower or something. Her family, and they didn’t care enough to stay. Chrissy didn’t have them.

Steve sat there, Robin by his side and Munson by hers, as they waited until Chrissy could get visitors.

It felt like days.

His chest still burned.

He didn’t hear when the nurse agreed to let them in to see her, only felt as Robin dragged him by a hand and Munson by the other, up the elevators, down too many corridors, a white door on a white wall, white floors and white ceilings, and he could only remember Chrissy’s red shoes and Chrissy’s green shoes and Chrissy’s blue eyes.

They were closed as they entered her room. No blue eyes in sight.

His feet took him closer without him noticing.

He sat on a chair next to her bed. She looked so pale. Steve’s chest was burning.

Why did it take him so long?

He finally had Chrissy’s soulmark, it was a rose, but at what cost?

It was a dead rose.

“She was convulsing,” Munson started talking, from the other side of the bed, and Steve tore his eyes away from Chrissy to look at him as he explained. “I took her to the trailer, she wanted ketamine, I had it in my room and when I went back to the living room she was already on the floor, I-”

“Eddie, breathe.” Robin was saying that a lot that night.

“I ran out the door, I didn’t know what to do. Red saw me, thankfully, and she was the one to call the ambulance as I just stood there in shock. Didn’t to anything. Fucking coward.” Munson’s last sentence was whispered, but the room was so quiet Steve heard it anyway. “It took the ambulance too long, and neither me or Red knew what to do to help her, just turned her sideways, but it took too long. By the time they got there she was crossing the line.

“She was dead for two whole minutes. They got her to the ambulance, used the defibrillator, her heart started again but they don’t know if she’ll have permanent damage from how long her brain was out of oxygen, or whatever.”

Munson ran his hands through his face, messing up his bangs, fingers visibly shaking, his knee nervously going up-down, up-down, up-down, up-down, up-

“Why did she wanted ketamine?” Steve heard himself asking.

Munson’s big eyes met Steve’s. They were brown. “I don’t know, man. She said in the woods she was losing her mind. Red said she saw Chrissy leaving the counselor’s office looking bad, and that she had some sort of break down in the bathroom? I don’t know, man.”

The room went silent again. Steve’s eyes searched for Chrissy’s blue ones, but they were still closed. His chest was burning.

“I have a dead rose on the right side of my chest now,” he said. He could feel Robin’s and Eddie’s eyes on him. “I know Chrissy since we were middle schoolers, and she was one of my best friends. Back when I was an asshole, before Nancy, she was the only one I could be my true self around. I went soft for her. I liked being soft for her. I never noticed.

I always wondered why she never had a mark. Carol and Tommy do. Nancy. Even Jonathan Byers. Robin has a whole bunch. Dustin, Max. Fucking- Billy Hargrove.” He swallowed around the lump in his throat. His chest was burning. “Chrissy never got one. She’s got a dead rose now.” He turned to face Robin. Not the blue eyes he wanted to see, but comforting blue nonetheless. “The only flower I know. Roses are for romantic soulmates, the permanent ones, as cliché as they could be. ”

“I know,” Robin whispered.

“I only got her when she died?” Steve asked, Robin’s blue eyes soft on him. Always soft.

“She’s not dead, Steve. She’ll wake up.”

Steve sighed and looked back at Chrissy in the bed. She almost looked like she was just sleeping. But the lack of pink in her cheeks denounced her. He could only think about red shoes, brave brave Dorothy and her two coward Lions.

At least she had them, now.

Eddie’s leg was still bouncing up-down, up-down, up-down. Robin’s right hand was holding Steve’s left one, and her left one was resting right beside Chrissy’s leg.

She had them, now.

Steve had her, now. It took him way too long, he was almost way too late, but he had her, now. He wouldn’t leave again.

Chrissy’s fingers twitched.

The beeping of the machine went a little faster.

She groaned, a beautiful sound, and her eyes opened slowly as the other three in the room held their breaths.

Blue eyes met Steve’s.

His chest stopped burning.

He could breathe again.

Two years later

Blue eyes met Steve’s.

Soft, always so soft.

“Good morning,” he whispered, kissing her forehead.

She sighed, a beautiful sound.

“Morning, Steve.” His name like a prayer from her mouth.

Her legs intertwined with his, memories of all the other beautiful sounds she made last night and the night before, running through his mind. No barriers between their bodies, between their skins.

“I gotta call Eddie tonight,” she said, voice still slurred from sleep.

“Mm.” Steve looked past her naked shoulder, could see the trees outside the window of the RV, a soft breeze ruffling the leaves. They had to leave camp that night, Chrissy wanted to head south. “Yeah, it’s been a whole day, he must be worried sick.”

She laughed, a beautiful sound, and Steve turned his face back down to look at her again.

Blue eyes met his.

Her charmingly crooked teeth greeting him in a blinding smile. He loved her.

Her skin was warm against him, her hand on top of his chest. A beautiful, fire-red rose under her palm, a delicate golden band sparkling from her ring finger. He smiled at the sight. Traced the fire-red rose on her left ribs that he knew was his.

He had her, now. She had him.

He wouldn’t leave again.

#cheerscoops #chrissy cunningham x steve harrington #steve harrington x chrissy cunningham #cheerscoops fanfic #chrissy cunningham fanfic #steve harrington fanfifc #cheerscoopsweek23 #cheerscoopscentral #lui writes

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mapsthewanderer · 5 months ago

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Hey lately I have reading your fanfifcs and little ideas, and I cant stop thinking how you write Caleb so well, the song of J'lullaby reminds me so much of the nickname little sun, I wanted to say that I love reading what you do, FIGHTING but dont forget to take breaks

Oh dear, thank you so much 🥹 It’s such a joy that somebody out there enjoys my writing. I can assure you that breaks are taken!

That song is beautiful! Never heard it before but it’s super Caleb coded. I’ve listened to the song non stop this morning. Thank you for sharing 🫶🏻

#thank you #caleb coded songs #really: thank you 🥹

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salisc00l123 · 1 month ago

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you will start to cough in 3 days

MP O, DRU.////.😲😲🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎😪😪O WIL GET TOPT THE FANFIFCS TSOON🎰😞😞😞boo

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autistic-creature-appears · 2 years ago

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Shadamy Week 2023 - Day 1 - Immortality

Shadow

I hated thinking about my immortality. Or, more specifically, the mortality of others. After Maria's death, I was more afraid than ever about losing the ones I loved. So I shut myself off, in order to protect myself.

You can't lose what you don't have.

At least, it was like that until... she decided to become a part of my life.

Her name was Amy Rose, and... she couldn't be more perfect. She was sweet, gentle, and beautiful. She reminded me of Maria in many ways.

I don't know what kept me coming back to visit her. She was fleeting, whereas I was not. Why was I risking affection?

I was pulled out of my thoughts by that melodic voice. "Shadow? What are you doing?"

"Thinking, is all."

I saw Rose approaching out of the corner of my vision. "May I join you?"

"Sure."

She shuffled close and sat next to me, looking up silently at the starry sky. "It's beautiful, isn't it?" She delicately whispered, her soothing voice washing over my ears. She was comforting in many ways.

I took a look up as well. "Quite."

We sat together for a little while until she finally spoke up again.

"My parents used to tell me something to provide comfort after my pet turtle died. They said that every soul lives on in the stars, looking down and protecting us. That they would be there every step of the way, and that we would join them someday and dance among the galaxies together. Sometimes I feel their gaze as they watch me."

She pointed at a constellation in the sky.

"I believe that cluster of stars is my parents. Whenever I'm lonely, I remember they are always with me, no matter what."

I was silent for a moment. "That's nice to think about."

Maybe I didn't have to avoid love after all.

Crossposted on Wattpad, Quotev, Neobook, and AO3. Ask for my username(s) there and i'll tell you (im just really tired rn)

#shadamy #shadamy week #shadamy week 2023 #sonic #sonic the hedgehog #fanfic #sonic fanfifc #sonic series #sonic franchise #shadow the hedgehog #amy rose #shadow the hedghog x amy rose

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laceybarbedwire · 3 years ago

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A new chapter of my Moon Nancy fic is out!

In which Nancy and Robin see a movie, are both useless lesbians at each other, and Nancy is bad at pretending to be a human.

#ronance #fanfifc #fanfiction #femslash #stranger things #robin x nancy #nancy x robin #robin buckley #nancy wheeler

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huysmut · 4 years ago

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favorite smuts

BTS

JEON JUNGKOOK KIM TAEHYUNG PARK JIMIN KIM NAMJOON JUNG HOSEOK MIN YOONGI KIM SEOKJIN

#masterlist #btssmut #jinsmut #yoongi smut #jin smut #hoseok smut #namjoon smut #jimin smut #taehyung smut #jungkook smut #bts #imagine #kpop smut #kpopimagine #bts x reader #btssmutclub #bts fanfifc

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peakyblinderswhore · 5 years ago

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DAY 3 ⇨ MATRESS ANGELS

GENRE: Christmas!au, Fluff I’m a fucking liar, Smut, 18+ only.

PAIRING: Michael x Reader

SYNOPSIS: Michael and yourself weren’t exclusive but strictly speaking, you did spend an awful amount of time together that certainly suggested that you were. Spending the night at Polly’s on Christmas Eve would only make this assumption more valid. On the assumption that you are exclusive, Polly offers up one of her rooms... with one bed. What are two, young, hormone-filled adults going to do with just one bed?

W/C: 3.4k

WARNINGS: it’s fucking dirty, yo. swearing, oral (m + f receiving), cunnilingus, fingering, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it!), degradation kink(?), hair pulling, spit is used as lubrication (it’s the 1920′s, c’mon), it doesn’t really have anything to do with christmas, pwp, it’s the dirtiest shit i’ve ever written, tiny tiny overstimulation, dom!michael, sub!reader ig, sex, sex, more sex, uh that’s it i think

A/N: to that one anon who always asked me for michael smut. yeah. you know who you are. i’m not sure if i’m writing this out of anger or to please you. bruh i love you fr fr though. in the heat of the moment i actually wrote something. lol hats off to you though.

cross posted onto ao3 here

“Michael, there’s only one bed,” you whisper to him.

He hums, “Mum must’ve had an inkling about us. I can sleep downstairs if you want,” he offers, raising an eyebrow.

The two of you were spending Christmas at Polly’s as per your suggestion in her townhouse out in the countryside. To be fair, you had mentioned it in passing after Polly had mentioned that she would have more than enough room for Michael to stay for the eve of Christmas and to be there the morning of to save journey time. He had winced and his hand that rested on your lower back firmed, he didn’t know how to reply and you could sense that through the thin material of your dress.

“I don’t know, Mum, I was going to do my rounds with Y/N.”

Polly’s eyes had lingered over Michael’s hand that rested on your back but only momentarily, you had noticed this but pretended not to when you said, “Well, I was only going to visit Michael... if you don’t mind me staying the night too I’d be more than happy to make up for the burden.”

That was two weeks ago. And here you were, staring at the bed. The singular bed. The only bed in the room. At least it was a double.

“It’s okay,” you say, referring to his offer of sleeping elsewhere, “we’re adults. We can share one bed.”

Michael perches on the end of the bed and takes off his shoes, opting for something more comfortable, while you lay down on the other side, arms spread out wide, trying to think of something to say to keep the conversation going and to stop your mind from wandering.

“Let’s make snow angels!”

“Pardon?”

“I said,” you reiterate, pushing yourself up on an elbow to look at Michael peering over his shoulder at you, “let’s make snow angels!”

“How old are you?” although his comment doesn’t hurt as his grin widens on his face as he shifts his body to face you properly, “plus,” he begins, “It’s a mattress, much less, er, snow than what we would need.”

“...Mattress angels?”

Michael’s eyes suddenly darken and he makes his way to crawl towards you, I know what we could do...” his voice trails off and his fingers circle the skin where your dress finished suggestively.

“Michael!” Your face heats up form the suggestion, mortified that he would want to do something that dirty with Polly just a few doors down, “Polly, your Mother,” you emphasise, “is only a few doors down.”

He shrugs his shoulders and smirks, “Worried she might hear you?”

You snap your legs shut and sit up abruptly, startling him and forcing him to sit back again, “She’s not going to hear us because it’s not happening.”

Michael pulls back, not one to push you into somehting that you didn’t want to do, “Alright,” he moves on with the conversation, “Mum said we can go down for a late night snack or join her for a drink in a few.”

“Sounds good,” you say, thankful for Michael respecting your wishes, “I’ll slip something a little more comfortable on, then.”

Downstairs, Polly was passed out on the settee, a glass resting on the arm of her chair, her head resting on the back of her chair, lightly snoring. She had mentioned something earlier about being busy last night and the morning following it on. You smile and Michael chuckles, “We wouldn’t have had anything to worry about.”

You press a soft kiss to his lips, “This is nice though.”

“It is,” he presses a kiss back, kissing you slowly like he’s trying to savour every second he can to the fullest. His hands are resting on your hips, mindlessly rubbing circles with his thumbs whilst yours hang loosely around his neck, fingers scratching at the bottom of his hairline.

The fire crackled in the background as you and Michael continued to deepen the kiss, devouring each other as you began licking into the other’s mouth, tasting the wine that Michael had with his dinner earlier on. It gave him an intoxicating feel, making you want to taste this forever, his musk filling your senses and his fingers trailing your waist, contemplating whether or not to go much further. When Michael pulled away and rested his forehead against yours, he looked down to where his hands rested before flitting up to meet your gaze. His mouth was hung open, drinking in all the air that he couldn’t get moments ago.

“We should stop, you didn’t want to earlier and I’m afraid that if we continue I won’t be able to stop.”

Your eyes fill with lust, he notices but waits for you to say the word, “She is asleep,” you manage to whisper, still praying that she’s fast asleep adn far from waking up anytime soon.

“You can’t take it back if you say it.”

“I know...” you bring your lower lip between your teeth and bring your fingers to face, cupping his cheeks, you say, “take me upstairs, Michael.”

His mouth finds yours and he pushes your mouth open with a swipe of his tongue, moulding your mouths together as his hands wrap underneath your thighs. You obediently jump, locking your ankles behind his back and he holds you up by your ass. He doesn’t open his eyes as he walks up the stairs, sure you should’ve been worried but his mouth was much more captivating at this precise moment in time.

Before you knew it, you were being laid out on the singular bed in your room that you were staying in. Michael let go, kicking off his slippers and unbuttoning the top of his shirt. When he connects your mouths again, it’s a clash of teeth and tongues and your hands instantly reach for the warmth underneath his shirt. His hand reaches behind your head and pulls at the pins holding your hair together before throwing them in the vague direction of the dresser that had become home to your limited luggage.

You had locked your legs around his waist again, aching for the feeling of his hard cock against your heated core, praying for some kind of friction that would relieve your need for him. His hands rested either side of your head, slowly crawling onto the bed to meet you level with him.

At this, you arched up, pulling your hand from his shoulder and slipping off your robe and pushing it to fall off of the bed and then reach to unbutton his shirt all the way and throw it on the floor with your robe. This meant Michael was half naked but you still had a slip on. He lifted a hand and wrapped his fingers around your throat, pulling you up to meet his tongue and to see how far he could get his tongue before you whined, like you usually did.

Whimpering, Michael smiled at your vocal plead to move on, unravelling his fingers from your throat and connecting his lips to your neck, wanting to see how far he could get you without touching you.

He bites and licks at your neck, enough to make your eyes roll and your nerves to tingle, making your fingers curl in his hair, tugging from the pleasure. You breathe heavily against his ear and push him away from your neck, unbuckling his belt with eager fingers, but as you were about to push his trousers down to his thighs, he stops you and presses a firm kiss to your lips.

“Let me,” he whispers against your mouth, “just...” his voice fades away as he lowers his head to your perk nipples, showing evidently through the incredibly thin slip you were wearing. Without a second to spare, he latches his teeth to your nipple, lightly pulling them, making you fidget from the sensitivity you were currently experiencing. Then, he circles his tongue on your areola thorugh the fabric, leaving a wet patch before capturing your breast in his mouth.

“Oh, sweet Jesus, Michael...” your head rolls, “I’m begging you to fuck me... like you mean it.”

Grunting, he pushes his trousers down and kicks them off, obediently, not wanting to miss this moment, either, “I fucking love you so much right now.”

You lift your head to view his figure. His eyes were ravaging your body as he thought about what to do next. You grasped the bottom of your slip and pulled it over your body and reached a hand down to acknowledge your throbbing pussy.

“Oh fuck, that’s hot.”

You giggle, “Do something about it then, won’t you,” you pout and put on the best puppy eyes you can, “please?”

Immediately, his tongue swirls over each of your taut nipples and down your stomach, loops your belly button and nudges through your pubic hair to your clitoris. His lips attach and suck for dear life, making you let out the girthiest moan you’d ever heard from your own body, making you slap you hand over your mouth as Michael continued, refusing to let up. He reaches a hand below your leg, hooking it over his shoulder and bringing his hand around it to rest on your inner thigh to hold it in place. His other hand runs along your folds, teasing you. He halts briefly to push his fingers past your soft lips, lubricating them with your saliva before bringing them back down and pushes one slowly into your hole.

“Tell me... use your words with me,” he growls against your clit.

His tongue doesn’t leave your clit, swiping his tongue from your hole to your clit and mimics the tongue twister you had joking taught him one time.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you breathe out in breathy moans just as he pushes a second finger into your pussy, meaning that you were now barely able to string together a coherent sentence. It was more than enough feedback for him, what with your fingers tightening around the strands of hair you had in your fists, he responded to everything your body was telling him. “You like that, baby? Huh?” His eyes flick up to watch as you begin to fall apart, breathing heavy and eyes unfocused.

“Y-yes.”

Still pushing his fingers in and out of you, he continues feeling around for the spot that he knew was nearby -- he was no stranger to your body this intimately.

“How about this, then?”

He lifts his head from your throbbing pussy and lets his hand that was locked around your thigh move to rub calculated circles over your clit. He spits onto his fingers as they continue to move in and out to allow an easier slide.

At this point, his fingers hit the spot and your body arches, lifting away from the bed, “Th-there, don’t... s-stop.”

Now knowing where he was aiming for, he allows his fingers to move at a faster pace and lets his thumb rub harder circles into your clit. He bends his head down to lick stripes into your pussy wherever he could, occasionally lifting his thumb to switch for his tongue and vice versa, pushing you to the edge.

“Yes, Michael, yes!”

He switches his fingers for his tongue, pushing in and out of your entrance, wanting to taste you.

“Wanna taste you,” he says, “can you do that for me, baby?”

You bite your lip and nod, “Mhmm.”

His thumb continues its attack on your clitoris and within seconds your coming apart on his face. Micahel laps up your release on his tongue and helps you ride out your high.

When your body relaxes and your fingers uncench his hair his lifts his head, lips glistening from your arousal, “You taste so fucking sweet.”

Ignoring him, you pull his face up to yours and begin to kiss him sloppily, mind still foggy from your orgasm only moments ago. You smile at the taste of yourself still fresh on his lips and reach a hand down between the two of you to address the, ahem, third member present in the room.

Michael moans as your fingertips brush lightly across the strained material of his underwear, over his erect cock.

“Your turn,” you mumble, “wanna make you cum.”

Tucking your fingers under the band of his underwear, you push them down to his knees and push at his chest lightly, making him lay back so you could pull them off all the way. The soon got lost in the jumble of clothes piling up on the floor.

Swinging your hair over your shoulder, you thumb lightly at the head of his cock, swiping the moisture that had gathered and spreading it before circling your fingers around his rock hard cock and pumping it a couple of times.

Michael bites his lip, holding back a low groan, “Suck,” he demands.

Willingly, you grin and wrap your lips around the head and swirl your tongue around the tip. You begin to gradually push his dick further into your mouth, flattening your tongue on the underside of his dick and humming. Bobbing your head up and down, Michael knots your hair around his fist and helps you maintain your rhythm. “Y/N, just like that,” he groans out. You let your hand travel down to your pussy and to play with your clit, getting off on Michael’s moans dancing through the air like a sweet lullaby to your sinning ears.

“Greedy slut,” he says, grinning, “can’t wait for your second orgasm when I haven’t even had one?”

You stop toying with your clit and decide to see just how far you could take his cock in your throat and hollow your cheeks. At this, you could practically feel it twitch in your mouth. You press your hands onto his thighs to balance yourself as you lower your head until your nose is nudging the hair at the base of his cock. He lets out an almighty growl as he strains himself, not wanting to buck into your mouth but you moan at the feel of him and he fucks into your mouth, cock hitting the back of your throat and tears filling your eyes from the stinging.

“Fucking hell...” he moans out.

You lift your head and bring one hand to the base of his cock, squeezing at different pressures before lifting your lips from his cock and releasing it with a pop. You wipe the tears with the back of your free hand.

Michaels head lifts to meet your eyes. You smile, saliva dribbling down your chin, “Good?”

His eyes darken at the question, “Do that again and I might cum down your throat.”

Your eyes squint at the challenge and you drop your head to lick a stripe from the base of his cokc to the tip, making him shiver from the pleasure but before you could drop your lips to his cock again his hand grips at your neck, “Not today, baby. I need to fuck you.”

He pulls you up and goes to flip you but you quickly blurt, “Can I be on top?”

“Fuck yes, you can.”

He helps you up to hover above his erect penis. You grip it tightly and guide it towards your entrance before sinking down onto it.

“Oh, Michael,” you groan at the girth of his dick, pushing your pussy open.

“Y/N how are you so fucking tight?”

You laugh a little, the sting of the stretch of his dick stopping you halfway and settle on resting your hands on his chest, “Why don’t you fuck me more often?” You counter.

Michael’s eyes darken more — if that’s even possible — and lifts you off his dick almost entirely before slamming into you, making you whine.

“Like that?”

“Yes,” you whimper.

You move forward to rest on your elbows, the sting subsiding from the stretch and begin to move your hips in a swiveling motion, not wanting Michael to abolish your pussy before you’d even started.

“Such a fucking tease.”

You clench your pussy around him, loving the jolt of pleasure that ran through your body at his comment, “Oh, shit.”

“You like that? You dirty little slut, soaking my dick for me.”

Meeting your swivels, Michael sets the pace, thrusting up and everytime you bit back a moan from echoing against the walls.

“Michael,” you whimper out, making him throw his head back and growl at your needy self.

You try to force Michael to go slower but he only ghosts his fingers across your clit, rubbing vicious circles into it. Your head falls forward and you groan as he grunts with every thrust.

He was forcing you to edge quicker than you would’ve liked but the high outweighed any con your fuzzy brain could muster up when the pleasure Micahael was inducing soared through your pussy and to the coil in your stomach, slowly tightening the more he did it.

“Michael, s-so close...”

At this he pulls out and flips you so you’re on your hands and knees and he’s behind you, lining up his cock with your centre and sinking in, once again met with the warmth of your velvety walls.

He slams into you, once again and continues to pound at the same speed, making every thrust harder than the last, somehow reaching further than the last time.

“Hold it for me, baby, can you do that for me?”

You whimper in response, already so close as it is and not sure how much longer you can fend it off.

Michael grips your hair and pulls you back so you arch up and your back meets his chest, “I asked a question, can you do that?”

“Yes. Fuck me, Michael.”

“Good, little slut.”

You clench at that and he lets go of your hair, stabilising himself by gripping your hips hard enough that there would probably be finger-shaped bruises but you didn’t care — not when he was pounding into you, hitting your spot just right, “Right, there, Michael, I’m so fucki—”

He sneaks a hand round to rub circles in your clit and lets the other grab a handful of boob, squeezing and kneading it as much as he wants.

“Good girl, I’m so close, almost there, now.”

You whine, his fingers getting quicker and his thrusts sloppier.

“Oh, fu-fuck..” he groans, “now, you can cum now.”

Crying out his name, you release your hold on your orgasm, feeling the coil snap inside you, now thrilled that you no longer have to stave it off and you fall forward. Michael wraps his arm around your chest, catching you so he can continue to fuck into you.

“That’s it, baby, milk my cock like the good fucking girl you are.”

Michael’s thrusts become erratic as he chases his high. When he reaches it, you feel him releasing his seed deep inside your pulsating pussy. He slows down his thrusts, riding out both of your highs for you.

When he shudders one final time, he slumps forward, cheek resting on your sweaty back but he didn’t care.

After a few moments, he pulls his softening cock out of your sore pussy, making you wince from the over-stimulation. He presses a soft kiss to your back and goes to fetch a wet soft-cloth to clean you up. Your eyes flutter closed and you only know he’s returned by the soft caress of his hand down one thigh, pushing them apart so he can clean you up. You whimper from the soreness but let him continue as you know it has to happen in order to stay clean.

He hums as he goes about cleaning you up and tosses the cloth to the side where he can address it in the morning.

You pat the bed beside you and he climbs in, hugging you from behind and pressing multiple soft kisses to your back, making you shiver.

“That was...”

You wait for him to continue.

“Can we do that again?”

“Like now?” you reply, alarmed.

“Uh.”

“Jesus Christ, Michael, what are you made of?”

“So I’m guessing that’s a no.”

“You bet your ass it’s a no.”

He waits a beat.

“Wake me up before Polly gets up in the morning,” you mumble.

Michael grins, “You know I will.”

“I do.”

302 notes · View notes

makebank · 5 years ago

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save me

Summary: You stop caring about your life. JJ comes in at just the right time.

Warnings: drug use, cussing, unwanted physical touch

Word Count: 1.1k

A/N: i got a little carried away for a blurb, but had some time before work today. hope you enjoy!! idk how i feel about it but oh weeell.

Request: would you be comfortable with writing a request where JJ has to save you from a situation gone wrong with barry and rafe?

You were unsure of why you kept the company that you did. Maybe it was because you didn’t value yourself. Maybe it was because you didn’t think you deserved better. Or maybe it was just that you stopped caring.

You were slumped into the back of an old dirty couch with your eyes glued to the table in front of. Rafe was smashed into your side, always near you. He was arguing with Barry about the white powder on the table in front of you. The house was filled with a bunch of other low lifes having nothing better to do than spend their time here. But hey you were there too.

“C’mon man let me and my girl get a little taste of the merchandise.” Rafe was always adamant about trying the product. Not because he cared about the quality but because he couldn’t pass up a line. You on the other hand didn’t care either way. You could go without it, but it was just always there. So why not? It’s not like your life was great anyway. The insufferable kook life surrounded you everywhere. Always pretending you were perfect. It was exhausting. Your parents loved Rafe, not even having a clue who he really was. Just that he, too, came from money. You had succumbed to the idea that this life was as good as it was going to get. So you decided you didn’t care to try for anything better.

You rolled your eyes at their back and forth banter. You always hated coming to the cut with Rafe and dealing with his hostile drug dealers. “You say that every time Country Club. It’s fine. I always have the good stuff. Besides you still owe me money from last time” Barry tried to defend himself. Rafe just raised his eyebrow upset at not getting his way like always. “I will come through this time. I promise. I’ll charge the rich kids more this time.” Rafe was pleading like a child. Barry just huffed and started making a few lines.

Rafe snorted the first then leaned back into the couch satisfied. He handed you the rolled-up bill and you followed suit. Every time it hit your system the rush was unexplainable. It made you feel good just for a moment.

Just then you heard the front door slam open to a familiar blond pogue boy. JJ Maybank. You’ve heard numerous stories about him, but have only exchanged a few words every now and then. His eyes met yours for a moment in your blissed-out state, then he moved through the house shouting for what sounded like his dad. Rafe continued snorting lines, getting carried away like always.

As you were just getting bored of watching him, Rafe left the room not even telling you where he was going. Barry, then saw this as his opportunity, he came over and sat next to you on the couch. You grimaced at the greasy man. He placed his slimy hand onto your thigh, and just as quickly you threw it off. He brought it back and gripped it even harder and started to slide up. “Stop!” You yelled hoping he’d get the hint or Rafe would hear and come back. But your eyes scanned the room and no sight of him anywhere.

Barry leaned in, holding your body to the couch, and moved his lips to your neck. You felt queasy and violated. Tears started to fall down your cheek, as you came to realize you wouldn’t be able to do anything about it. Just like the rest of your life.

“What the fuck? Get the hell off her man!” you heard a different voice shout. Barry was ripped off the top of you and thrown to the ground. Punches were flying to his face, delivered by the feisty surfer.

You finally caught up to what was happening and found your voice. “JJ please stop!” as much as you hated Barry you didn’t want to cause any more problems with him, knowing the consequences. JJ listened and got off of the bleeding and groaning man. He looked at your defeated posture and tear stained cheeks. He reached out his bloody hand for you to grab.

“You want to get out of here?” He offered. You were unsure why he cared to help you. But you were more unsure of why you wanted to go with him. Rafe wasn’t your boyfriend, but he parades you around like you were. You allowed it because it made your family satisfied. But looking into his blue eyes, your heart started to speed up. And not because of the drugs for the first time. He made you feel safe just for a moment and something about him was so inviting.

You nodded your head and placed your hand into yours. He pulled you out of the house and you both started walking down the unpaved road. “Thank you… for that.” you mumbled.

“Barry is a creep. I hate that dude. Besides you didn’t look too happy before that.” Your eyes went to the ground feeling embarrassed that people could tell how miserable you were. You tried so hard for it not to show. “Yeah. Life just sucks sometimes, I guess. You didn’t look too happy there either. Did you find your dad?” you were curious even though it was sort of nosey. He quirked a brow at you for noticing him too.

“You can say that.” he looked disgusted by the topic of his father. “Well, I should probably head home. Thanks again. I don’t know why you helped me, but I really appreciate it.” JJ frowned at your words. “I don’t know why you spend your time with them if you’re miserable. You don’t have to be unhappy. I see you all the time y/n and you look like you hate your life. Come hang out with me today. I’ll show you a good time.” He started smirking full of himself.

You were confused why you were thrilled at the idea of spending the day with him. But here in front of you was a person making you feel anything but empty. You were in no position to pass it up. You smiled in return, “Fine. It can’t be worse than Barry” you giggled. You’d deal with Rafe and your parents later.

JJ’s smile took up his entire face and he brushed his loose blond hairs back. Once more he motioned for you to take his hand. He intertwined your fingers and whisked you away from all the pain and suffocation of your life.

#des writing #jj maybank #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank x you #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank x y/n #outerbanks #obx #outerbanks fanfifc #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron #barry

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hongcherry · 5 years ago

Text

Drifting | pjm | 4

✿ Pairing: dancer!Jimin x dancer!Reader(f)

✿ Genre: Fluff, angst, established relationship, college au

✿ Warnings: Fluff, angst, lip smooches, neck smooches, it’s hard to describe dance moves sometimes so I hope I made it (somewhat) clear

✿ Summary: It’s time for your midterm presentation. Despite the countless hours of practice, you still didn’t feel ready. The combination of emotions was overwhelming you and you suddenly wanted to find closure. You were worried your emotions were in such disarray that it would negatively affect your performance. On top of that, Jimin was still avoiding you and you needed to do something before your relationship was ruined beyond saving.

✿ Word count: 10.8k (oops)

✿ Status: Completed

✿ A/N: Ta-da! I hope you enjoyed this adventure. I’m proud that I pushed through and finished this series since I rarely finish my works (I’m awful). Thank you so much for reading and giving my writing a chance. I didn’t mean to write this much. (Fun fact: I deleted all this by accident and I thought I lost it all. Thankfully, I didn’t, but it sure gave me a fright haha).

previous // masterpost // next

“We need to do that again,” you spoke, slightly out of breath with your hands on your hips. The sun was just beginning to rise behind you as you stood next to Jungkook near where you were last night with Namjoon. You and Jungkook had agreed yesterday to meet early to get some practice in before you had to leave for campus again. You had found a flat area next to the lake and had suggested the spot since it was far enough to not disturb the others with your noise. Plus the view was glorious and you were hoping it would calm you.

Unfortunately, it didn’t succeed. You were stressed.

“We’ve done it eight times already. I think we got it,” Jungkook said and took a sip of his water. You couldn’t tell if it was from being tired, stressed, or annoyed with your boyfriend that you were so frustrated with the littlest things. You had been practicing with Jungkook for already thirty minutes with no stops, but you still weren’t satisfied with anything.

“It isn’t good enough. Mrs. Seung will be nitpicking everything,” you replied and reached for his phone to play the music again. He was quicker, though, and snatched the phone and raised it above his head. You reached up quickly, trying to grab it before it got out of your reach. Unfortunately, he was faster and you stood there like a child with their arm up on their tip-toes.

You dropped your arm with a huff and glared at him. Why do tall people do this to short people? They are abusing their powers. “We don’t have enough time to be playing games, Jungkook.”

“What happened to Koo?” He asked, teasingly, his hand still raised.

“You only get called that when you’re being good.”

“I am being good. We need a break. I’m helping,” he said and stepped away from you. He put out his other arm when you followed him. “No, no, Y/N. We’re taking a ten-minute break.”

“Five,” you argued, knowing that you weren’t going to win. He chuckled and nodded.

“Okay, five minutes.”

You grabbed your water bottle and took a drink, watching him as you did so. He simply smiled at you, slowly lowering his arm and checking something on his phone.

“Have you been enjoying yourself?” You asked as silence loomed over you both. He peeked up from his phone.

“Anything is better than staying in the dorms,” he said, typing something then sliding his phone in the pockets of his sweats.

“True, but how do you like the cabin?” You reached up and fixed your ponytail as you spoke.

“It’s spacious. Taehyung wouldn’t stop gushing about it last night,” he said with a small laugh. “I can’t blame him, though. It’s impressive.”

You hummed in agreement and averted your attention to the water. In the morning light, the water wasn’t as spooky. You sat silently, allowing your breath to ease, and your body to relax. You didn’t stay there long, though, standing up after a few moments.

Five minutes had surely passed and it was time to get started again. You needed more time to get your mind off of everything. Simply staring at the water was nice, but it didn’t stop your thoughts. Could anything stop your thoughts? You hated the feeling in your chest. The feeling of regret, pride, stubbornness, disappointment all mixed together.

“We have a minute left,” Jungkook said when you started to reach for his phone again. You looked up at him and stared at him.

“It’s close enough. Let’s get going,” you grabbed for his phone again but he stopped you with his other hand on your wrist. His grip was gentle but firm enough to hold you in place.

“Our routine is stellar. You’re just being picky,” he said, half teasing you while keeping his hand on you. You glanced down at his hand on you. Your skin underneath was heating from his stilled hand. Goosebumps raced up your arm and you suddenly wondered if Jimin’s skin reacted the same when Yun Hee touched him.

“It’s been five minutes now,” Jungkook said gently, interrupting your thoughts. He let go of your wrist and started the music. Your wrist grew cold from the lack of heat and you suddenly missed it. The feeling of his strong fingers wrapped around your wrist. Oddly, you wished it was Jimin’s hands instead.

You both spent the next two hours practicing and perfecting the routine, focusing on the new partner section since that was the newest addition. Although you had a lot on your mind, it helped fuel your motivation. If you were focused on the routine, you weren’t focused on the other issues. Unlike before in class, you didn’t let those thoughts cloud your mind. You found a safe place while you danced with Jungkook. Despite your limbs feeling sore, you didn’t want to stop. You knew if you did, those thoughts would come flooding in. However, Jungkook was growing tired and insisted you both call it a day for practice since you were already planning to practice later tonight on campus. You couldn’t wait for this midterm to be over tomorrow.

You couldn’t deny the sadness that loomed over you as you helped make breakfast with everyone. Jimin would move toward you, looking as if he was going to tell you something, but retreated after a few seconds of hesitation.

You were being petty. You knew it, but your pride held you back from talking to him. You wanted to talk through this, Tae’s words eating away at you, but you couldn’t help the frustration that came with the thoughts of him and Yun Hee. You were also worried that you wouldn’t be able to talk civilly to him. The mere thought of them infuriated you and you were sure you were going to explode and say things you didn’t mean.

You spent the rest of the morning and the ride back to campus lost in your thoughts. You tried to interact with others, but you couldn’t focus and gave up. Your friends grew worried, trying to talk to you, but ended up leaving you to the mayhem inside your mind when you brushed them off. Were you being selfish for being secluded in your own world? Probably. Were you overreacting? Probably. You knew what you needed to do and you planned to suck it up and talk to Jimin. It’s been too long since you heard his voice directed to you. Been too long since he called you baby or jagiya, hearing his Busan dialect slip and making your heart flip at the sound of it. Been too long since his hands were on you and his lips pressing against yours.

You would be lying if you didn’t admit that part of you were waiting for Jimin to make the first move. However, he hasn’t, and you wondered if he ever would or if you two would drift away to the point a verbal breakup wasn’t necessary. You two would just know. You hoped it wouldn’t come to that. Although it would tear you apart, you needed the verbal confirmation. You needed the closure that came with it. Sometimes you felt breaking up would be the easiest solution. However, the feeling that came with the thought of it made you falter. The way your heart tightened and your breathing stopped when you imagined a life without Jimin.

You knew you had to do something to fix this.

With this in mind, you were walking down the various dance practice rooms. You had gone to Jimin’s dorm but were greeted by Taehyung and him alone. He had told you Jimin had just left a few minutes ago to practice with Yun Hee. The feeling of envy erupted in your chest but you choked it down. If you succumb to that feeling, this cycle would never end. Plus, you were going to practice with Jungkook soon. You needed to stop these hypocritical thoughts.

The hallway felt as if it was never-ending. Your feet dragged along the hardwood, passing several empty rooms. When you got to a closed door, you peeked into the small window on the door, moving onto the next when you didn’t see Jimin or Yun Hee. After checking two other rooms, you finally spotted your boyfriend. Your hand was on the door handle, ready to push it open when Jimin pulled Yun Hee against his chest. You could hear the faint sound of music from the room but it wasn’t clear enough to tell if it was the routine’s song. Was this part of their choreography?

You were frozen as you watched Yun Hee’s lips curl up into a smile, pressing her hands against his chest and slowly moving them up until they were wrapped around Jimin’s neck. Jimin was staring down at her. He wasn’t smiling at first but after Yun Hee spoke, he grinned. They spoke for a few more minutes, though it felt like years before Yun Hee moved a hand to caress his face and started to lean forward. Was this really happening? Your heart was racing as you watched the two of them. You wanted to shove the door open. You wanted them to know they were caught. You wanted Jimin to know he had hurt you. Though you did none of those actions. You simply stared, wide-eyed becoming blurry, as you watched in slow motion as she leaned toward Jimin. Before you could catch their faces getting any closer, a hand was set on your shoulder. You jumped, quickly turning and moving away from the door.

Jungkook stared at you, a mixture of confusion and happiness in his eyes.

“I didn’t think we were going to meet until thirty minutes?” He asked. He was happy to see you but was perplexed at your early appearance.

“Oh, I,” you stuttered. You didn’t want him to know you had just caught your boyfriend with another girl in his arms. “I figured I should practice by myself so I was ready for our practice.”

He chuckled, eyes raising to view into the room you were looking into, but you quickly grabbed his hand and moved him away.

“But since you’re here, let’s start early,” you said quickly and pushed him down the hall.

“Wha-?” He started but let you move him anyway. “Okay,” he said slowly, giving in to your shoves and glancing at you before heading toward an empty room on his own.

You wanted to follow Jungkook without a second glance, but you couldn’t stop your eyes from wandering into the room again. Jimin and Yun Hee were no longer in each other’s embrace. They had moved to grab their water and appeared to be taking a break. Letting out a sigh, you turned and made your way to Jungkook. If you were gone for too long, he’d come looking for you.

“Did you have anything specific you wanted to focus on today?” Jungkook asked when you entered the room. You realized you didn’t come with your bag and wouldn’t have anything to drink. Remembering Yoongi was going to come with Hoseok later, you quickly sent a message to him asking for a bottle of water.

“Oh, uh, I was just hoping to review the details to ensure our movements are precise,” you said while typing out your message to Yoongi.

“That sounds good,” he paused. “I was hoping we could also just sit and talk for a bit.”

You glanced up at him with a raised eyebrow. “Koo, you know our presentation is tomorrow. We don’t have much time to spare.”

“I understand, but we haven’t had the chance to get to know each other,” Jungkook said, a little nervous you wouldn’t agree.

“What does that have to do with our routine?” You asked and instantly frowned when you realized how that might have come off. If Jungkook was upset, he didn’t show it.

“We lack emotion, remember?” He replied. “I thought since we’re early, we can use this time to build that connection then we can have Hobi hyung and Yoongi critique us.”

You thought for a second, taking in his words and assessing the situation. Having the presentation tomorrow was making you anxious and all you wanted to do was practice until it was perfect. However, in order for it to be perfect, you needed the emotional appeal. Sighing in defeat, you nodded and laid on the floor. You moved an arm to rest over your eyes to block out the light. You waited while you listened to Jungkook shuffle across the floor before you heard a soft click, the lights in the room turning off. A small smile of satisfaction formed on your lips, but you kept your arm covering your face-- too lazy to move it.

“What did you want to talk about?” You asked, feeling Jungkook lay down next to you. Although he wasn’t touching you, he was close enough for you to feel his body heat.

He hummed as he thought. “Why did you major in dance? I know people consider it a useless degree.”

You stayed silent for a moment as you tried to find the right words. It wasn’t that you didn’t know the reason, but you didn’t want to say anything too cheesy. Though you figured Jungkook wouldn’t care.

“It was my getaway- I mean, it is my getaway. Something I can focus on and it takes me to this place in my mind where I feel everything is okay. It’s almost therapeutic in some way,” you began. Jungkook stayed quiet as you spoke. “It’s so much more than moving your body to music as some might think. It’s becoming who you want to be- whether it’s you or someone else. It’s acting without words, which I find really powerful,” you realized you had been rambling and forgot to answer his question. You quickly added, “In short, I chose it because it’s my passion.”

The only sound in the room was from the AC. Jungkook hadn’t made a movement or noise in a while and you wondered if he had fallen asleep. You slowly moved your arm from your eyes and turned your head to the side to peer at him. To your surprise, he was already staring at you. Even in the darkness, his eyes shined. You couldn’t quite make out what was in his eyes, but it seemed like admiration. That was silly, though.

“Was that too cliche?” You asked after a second of staring at each other. His lips quirked up in a grin, that cute bunny smile showing.

“No,” he chuckled. “It was nice. It’s interesting to hear other’s stories.”

“Well, what’s yours?” You asked, shifting to be on your side so you could face him. He continued to smile at you, expecting the question.

“Ahh, I actually didn’t have a passion for it at first. I enjoyed it, but it wasn’t something I could see myself pursuing. However, after Hoseok hyung started to get me to dance more, I realized it was a form of art. I started practicing with him and some other people and thus my passion grew,” he said, adding a playful tone toward the end. Although his story was much more simplistic than yours, you enjoyed it. You believed people didn’t need elaborate reasoning to enjoy something. You smiled at him and you found yourself enjoying his company more than you thought you would. Jungkook was always that person that was easy to talk to. Part of you wondered if after the presentation tomorrow would you still be friends.

The two of you fell into conversation effortlessly. As the minutes passed by, you became grateful for Jungkook to suggest this talk. It was nice to talk about something other than the turmoil in your mind or the presentation. You weren’t sure how long you and Jungkook talked, laying on the floor with the lights off. It felt as if it were ten minutes, but when the door opened and you checked your phone, you had seen it had been twenty minutes.

“Is nap time part of your routine now?” A teasing voice bounced around the room while the lights fluttered on. You and Jungkook blinked several times, trying to adjust to the new lighting.

“Can you believe this? They were napping!” Hoseok said to Yoongi as they entered the room, shutting the door behind them.

“We weren’t napping,” you huffed as you sat up, slowly raising to your feet after a second. “We were working on the midterm.”

“So how many eight counts did you change to just lay on the floor?” Hoseok asked and took a seat on the floor, his back against the mirror wall.

“We were building our connection, as you said,” Jungkook defended and stood up. Hoseok stared at you two, debating to believe you guys or not.

“I guess I’ll see when I watch the routine,” Hoseok shrugged, though a small smile was on his lips. You turned to Yoongi and reached a hand out to him.

“My snack?” You asked, remembering how you had only allowed him to come if he brought your favorite snack. Yoongi reached into the bag he brought and tossed you an orange and white bag. You caught it with ease and flipped over the bag to read the front.

Goldfish.

You smiled and looked at Yoongi. “Alright, you can stay.” Although a smile was playing on Yoongi’s lips, he rolled his eyes at your sassy attitude.

“I was staying regardless,” he shrugged.

“Goldfish? That’s your favorite snack?” Jungkook asked with a small laugh. You scoffed in mock defense.

“Yes! They’re delicious and cute. Do you know how they even came to be? Even the origin is endearing,” you argued and lifted the bag up, pointing to the cute cracker fish on the package.

“What’s the story?” Hoseok asked, intrigued by your sudden energy on the topic.

“A biscuit-maker in Switzerland created what is now known as Goldfish, for his wife’s birthday. Can you guess what her zodiac sign is?” You asked eagerly, excited to share the origin story of your favorite snack.

“Uhh, Pisces?” Jungkook asked as he watched your face brighten by his answer.

“Precisely!” You exclaimed. “Isn’t that cute?”

The three men nodded slowly, not expecting you to be this joyful over fish-shaped crackers.

“Wait, how did you know Pisces?” Hoseok questioned Jungkook.

Jungkook shrugged as he replied. “Its symbol is a fish and since the crackers are shaped like fish,” he trailed off, letting Hoseok fill in the rest.

“Okay, okay,” Yoongi interrupted, waving an arm lazily in the air. This wasn’t his first time hearing the Goldfish Oregon story. “I really want to see this performance before I have to go.”

“Go? Where are you going?” You asked and gently set down your Goldfish. They weren’t as good if they were crushed.

“I didn’t finish my work so I’m planning to stay up late,” he replied. Typical Yoongi, you thought. You wondered how he ever functioned with the lack of sleep he often got. It wasn’t that he was lazy, he just wanted everything to be perfect and he found himself working on side-projects rather than his actual projects.

“Alright, well, we need to get warmed up, then we’ll show you,” you said and waited for Jungkook to play some music for your warm-up.

Yoongi and Hobi waited patiently as you warmed up, only sitting up when you both started to get in the beginning position. You sat on the floor, facing diagonally with your legs bent and your arms resting on your knees. You peered at Jungkook through the mirror as he set the music toward the end before getting in his stance. He was facing away from you, simply standing with his feet shoulder-width apart. He met your gaze through the mirror, giving you his charming smile before looking away and getting prepared mentally for the routine.

You weren’t totally surprised by the advice Yoongi gave. Although he always gave reasonable advice, you weren’t sure if he was truly there to just observe or to actually give feedback. Hoseok, of course, also chimed in with fruitful advice. They both were proud of the finished product, which made you feel a little better about tomorrow’s presentation.

As you laid in bed, your mind filled with worry. It was a natural occurrence, however, this time the feeling was so strong you couldn’t sleep. The thought of forgetting the steps tomorrow, the failure that it would create for you and Jungkook, what you saw between Jimin and Yun Hee, the need to get answers but also wanting to disappear and avoid it-- all of it making it hard to relax. Although your plan to talk to Jimin today failed, you were determined to do so tomorrow. You couldn’t live with the constant weight that was glued to your shoulders. Taehyung’s words filled your mind as you laid in your bed along with your and Jimin’s conversation earlier this week. You had both agreed to not let this come between you two and yet it happened. And though Tae’s words weren’t exactly what you wanted to hear, you were grateful he took the time and tried to help. He did bring up valid points and you were slowly realizing just how valid they truly were.

Your hand reached out for your phone, typing in your password and going to Jimin’s contact. You brought your finger to hover over the call button. You wanted to hear his voice telling you it was okay again, that there was nothing between him and Yun Hee and it was all in your mind (which it could be, but what you saw said differently). You wanted to hear his velvety voice soothe you. However, you knew that wouldn’t be the case. You wouldn’t be greeted with that breathtaking voice. No, you would hear his cold tone. The one he would use when he kept people at arm’s length. You quickly locked your phone and set it back on your nightstand.

Tomorrow. You promised yourself. Tomorrow you’ll resolve this.

And hopefully, it won’t end in heartbreak.

As you were getting ready for your presentation, the smell of eggs and toast filled your senses. Seejun often went out for breakfast since she had to be up before you, but perhaps she brought some for you this time. This would be a late breakfast for her, though, which is odd.

You pushed aside your confusion as you brushed half your hair into a ponytail. You had already changed and packed your bag, ready to get your midterm over with. After double-checking your hair work, you grabbed your bag and walked out of your room.

“Good morning,” Seokjin said from the living room. You jumped at his voice, not expecting to find him here.

“Where’s Seejun?” You asked, not sure how he could get in without a key. Last you checked, he didn’t have one. Maybe Seejun gave him and Joon a spare recently without informing you.

“She forgot something at the cafe, she’ll be back soon. We just went to the one on campus,” he answered and raised his plate to show you his half-eaten breakfast.

“Why are you both eating so late?” You asked, heading to the small mini-fridge you and Seejun shared to grab a cold water bottle.

“Our midterm was today and we finished early. We both skipped breakfast, too,” he replied before shoveling another bite.

“That’s nice you finished early. I hope you get the score you want,” you paused, checking the time on your phone. “I better go before I’m late. I have my midterm today, too.” Seokjin smiled at you, waving at you as he wished you luck. You thanked him before leaving your dorm.

The walk to the dance studio was surprisingly pleasant until you caught sight of a familiar figure walking ahead of you. Although it may sound creepy, you knew his back like how you knew how many fingers you had. Something about the way he walked was distinctly Jimin.

His lean figure walked briskly to the studio, head staying forward as he didn’t detour from his path. Your hand twitched from where Jimin’s fingers usually interlaced with yours. You missed the way his hand molded with yours. You missed the way he would squeeze your hand every now and then as you both walked. You weren’t surprised when you didn’t find him waiting for you in the lobby this morning, though you couldn’t deny that you weren’t a little upset. You supposed it was better this way. You had time to think about what you were going to say to him today.

You didn’t realize you had slowed down until he turned a corner and you felt your legs moving slower than usual. You quickly glanced at the time on your phone, cursing to yourself when you saw you had two minutes before class, then following Jimin’s path in a hurry.

Of course.

Your (not-so) luck had made you and Jungkook go last, right after Jimin and Yun Hee. If it were up to you, you would’ve preferred to go first or second just so you could get it over with. However, Mrs. Seung had already assigned the order of the presentations. You had no option but to watch and feel more anxious by the second. Maybe this was Mrs. Seung's way of punishing you for requesting a partner change. As if the rougher grading wasn’t enough.

So far, everyone’s routine was profound. Your heart rate has slowly increased and you felt as if you were going stir crazy from the amount of anxiety you felt. You didn’t even want to stand up in fear your legs would give out.

You felt Jungkook lean into you, his ear close to yours as he whispered, “Take a deep breath. We got this.”

You couldn’t even digest his words or look at him for reassurance. You just felt your body grow hot and your palms become sweaty. You felt Jungkook rest a supportive hand on your thigh in hopes to calm you down. It did little to no help, however.

By the time it was Jimin and Yun Here’s turn, you had gone over the routine enough times to have it tattooed on your forehead. Though even from the countless practices in your mind, you didn’t feel ready. You were too focused on the dark flooring to have seen Jimin’s small frown when he saw Jungkook’s hand on you.

The start of the music startled you from your thoughts. Your gaze rose as you quietly watched Jimin and Yun Hee. They moved as if they fit for one another, matching the other’s movements fluidly. Shamelessly, you were searching for that connection Mrs. Seung has mentioned. You were analyzing their eyes as they met each other, searching for that spark people usually had when they saw their lover. You weren’t sure if you saw it or not, not fully trusting your sight since your mind was already clouded from what you saw in the practice room.

While at first, you were searching for that connection, it quickly shifted to focus on Jimin. Your eyes naturally followed him across the floor. Usually, you were in awe, but right now, you were distraught. You hated how he moved with such power yet softness. You hated how naturally talented he was. You hated the way your heart stopped beating just by watching him move. You hated how you yearned for him even more now. What about him dancing made you fall more in love with him even though you were upset with him?

When it was time for the partner section, you were zoned in on both of them. They went for a more fast-past choreography. They moved with power, moving as if the energy came from each other. They pushed and pulled against each other, letting one start the movement and allowing the other to finish it. Their choreography was unique compared to the previous presentations. You couldn’t disagree that their routine was impressive.

The class erupted in claps when the music ended. Although the class had been clapping after every presentation, this applause sounded louder than the others. Jimin and Yun Hee bowed in thanks before walking back to their spots against the wall.

Finally, it was time.

Jungkook gave you an encouraging smile as you both walked to the center of the room. Your body felt stiff yet jittery. You wanted nothing more but to run out of the room and although that was doable, you were positive Mrs. Seung wouldn’t be pleased.

“I’ve been delighted with all the presentations so far,” Mrs. Seung spoke as you and Jungkook got into the first position. “Since these presentations were not long, I will have your grades in by the end of the day.”

Jungkook peered at you as you lowered yourself to the floor, positioning yourself in the correct position for the start. If he was nervous, he hid it well as usual. He mostly looked worried about your wellbeing at this point.

“Let’s get it,” he whispered toward you, reminding you of your practices. Somehow, that made you ease up slightly. You glanced at him over your shoulder, nodding with a small smile on your lips.

“Ready?” Mrs. Seung asked. Jungkook gave a thumbs up and quickly whispered to you again.

“Get lost in the music.”

And so you did.

Well, you tried to at least. You couldn’t deny the first few eight counts weren’t the strongest. You did the movements fine, but it wasn’t anything spectacular. You simply executed them with minimum effort. It wasn’t until Jungkook was near you and he whispered for you to get lost again that you actually did.

The music slowed and you closed your eyes briefly as the counts became quieter and the music took its place. You were taken back to your last practice where you and Jungkook were laying on the floor with the lights off. You were reminded of what you told Jungkook. Your reason for dancing and why you pursued it.

Your movements became less calculated and more fluid. You moved to the rhythms of the music, matching Kook’s movements with ease. Your mind was consumed by the music and Jungkook. Your eyes met his every time you had a partner section, and although he wasn’t smiling, you could see he was proud of you through his eyes.

When it came down to the partner choreography section, your nervousness came back. This was a recent addition and (stupidly now that you thought of it) you and Jungkook had added several lifts in succession toward the end. The lifts were fairly average, but they could be easily messed up with the smallest wrong move. You needed to focus, yet stay relaxed.

The music slowed, indicating it was time to prepare for the lift. You stepped back slowly, remembering to drag your feet as the sound faded. You waited two seconds then ran toward Jungkook who had his arms out ready to grab your hips. The moment you felt his fingers on your hips, your heart stopped and the music picked up. He lifted you up with ease while you extended your arms to the side and your legs straight out, making sure you were pointing your toes. It was a small detail, but you knew it was important.

You kept your head held high as you stayed in that position for a few seconds. Jungkook lowered you and you gently repositioned one arm around his neck and the other resting on his shoulder. You met his eyes as you prepared mentally for the second part. Jungkook slowly slid one arm to wrap around your lower back and kept the other on your hip.

When the music increased in tempo, he quickly swung you to the left-- your body lowered slightly to the floor and your legs raised to a pike position. As he did, he lowered himself in a slight lunge. When you were swung for the second time, you straightened out the arm that was resting on his shoulder to the side and let your legs apart in the air to the right. You leveraged your weight by keeping a stronghold around his neck. Jungkook rotated his hips slightly to give your lift more power. He dropped the arm on your hip to his side, using the force of the swing to help hold you up with one arm around your back. The position was held for a second before gravity took over and you landed on the floor, spinning 360 degrees as soon as you landed and stopping in front of Jungkook.

You quickly twisted your body downwards, back facing him as he wrapped his arms around your waist. You held onto his arms as he spun you upwards. Your legs were together at first but parted midway into the flip. Your left leg landed first but you quickly shifted your weight to the right by gliding it backward in a semicircle and facing your body the other way. As you were doing so, you and Jungkook adjusted your hands so they were clasping the other’s opposite wrists. Without a second to spare and with your weight on your right foot, you rocked back and forth and used the momentum going forward to twist your body to the front, leaping off the floor with your legs in a straddle. Jungkook held onto your wrists tightly as you moved from one side to the next in the air, making sure he kept his stance stable since he was there to help support you. You landed gracefully, arms crossed over the other again. Once he made sure you were steady, he rotated his body to untangle your arms. The music slowed as you both slowly stepped closer to each other, stopping when your feet were a few inches away. You both held onto each other, breaths mingling, as the music faded out and the routine was finally over.

There was silence after the music stopped. Jungkook’s face broke into a smile and he squeezed your waist as the class began to clap. You returned the smile, instant relief flooding through your veins. Your midterm was over. You pulled away from his embrace, bowing before you took a seat.

The weight from this performance alleviated from your shoulders. You felt as if you could finally breathe properly. While you still wanted a good grade, just getting the performance out of the way put you at ease.

“I’m pleased with everyone’s performances today,” Mrs. Seung said as she walked to the center of the room. “As I said, your grades will be official today. No changes will be made to them, either. I hope you all enjoy the rest of the day and I’ll see you next class.”

Your heart was still trying to calm itself from the presentation when your instructor dismissed you. Slowly, you were gathering your bag and standing up after you saw some students leave the classroom. You barely noticed Jimin’s figure exiting with Yun Hee.

“I told you we had it,” Jungkook said and nudged you gently.

“We did good, Koo?” You said, but it sounded more like a question. Jungkook chuckled.

“We did great, Y/N. How about we go celebrate?” He asked and started walking toward the exit with you.

“We haven’t got our grade back, though. What if we did horrible?” You questioned, glancing up at him.

He shrugged, pulling out a black baseball cap and securing it on his head. “That doesn’t matter, well, not right now. I think we should celebrate getting our midterm over with.”

The small smile you had on your lips gradually turned upside down. While you wanted to celebrate with Jungkook, you really needed to talk to Jimin. You couldn’t keep delaying the conversation.

“Can we do it tomorrow maybe? There’s nothing I need to do today,” you replied nervously. You didn’t want to disappoint him, however, he didn’t seem to mind your decision.

“Of course. We can celebrate even more once we see our awesome grade,” he said. This made you scoff playfully. Hopefully, you did get an awesome grade.

“Sounds good. I’ll text you when I’m available, Koo,” you said as you neared the dorms. You were becoming anxious knowing you were about to talk to Jimin. Your relationship has never been in such turbulence before. You were both able to overcome your differences so far, but this was more than a mere disagreement. You were doubting how strong you thought your relationship was.

“I’m looking forward to it,” Kook smiled and stopped outside the entrance. When you gave him a confused look, he said, “Hoseok hyung asked me to keep him company while he worked on his mixtape if I was available.”

“His mixtape?” You asked, taken aback by the news of Hobi creating music. Neither Jungkook nor Hobi had mentioned being interested in making music. It reminded you of your best friend and you wondered what would happen if they collabed.

“Yes, it’s a hobby of his,” Jungkook shrugged.

“Ah,” you nodded. “Well, let him know I want to hear it as soon as he finishes.” Jungkook chuckled and agreed. Mumbling a goodbye, you both waved before you parted ways.

The walk to Jimin’s door felt different this time. Could this be the last time you visit it? You are so dramatic, you thought to yourself. You began thinking of the things you wanted to tell him when you saw him. You had told yourself you would be calm the whole time. You’ve had enough time to not get angry and, truthfully, you were growing tired of it. You were disappointed with yourself how you’ve been acting.

You hadn’t realized you had been standing outside his dorm until the door opened suddenly.

“He’s not here,” Tae said as soon as he saw you. Was it possible for your frown to grow deeper?

“Do you know where he is?” You asked, your voice quieter than normal. He pursed his lips together and leaned on the arm that was still holding the door open.

“If I tell you, will you promise that you two will stop moping around? It’s insufferable here. He’s so detached,” Tae huffed, though you knew he was genuinely worried.

“I can’t promise,” you replied honestly since you weren’t sure how this was going to end. “But I’ll try.”

“Try as hard as you can, yah? I need my friends back. Plural,” he emphasized the last part, raising his eyebrows at you. You nodded, wanting to give him a smile to know you appreciate him thinking about you, but you couldn’t find yourself to do so.

Once Taehyung told you where Jimin was, you were on your way.

Somehow you always found yourself here. The same hallway that you’ve visited multiple times this weekend. You peered through each window, looking for his lone figure.

Of course, he would be in this room-- it was his favorite. You always wondered why he chose this practice room to be his favorite. Anytime you had asked, he always gave you a joking reply. You eventually gave up asking him and figured he would enclose the reason on his own sometime.

Faint music was being played as he rushed his body into a sudden movement. You could tell he wasn’t paying attention to his surroundings by the hazy look in his eyes. The way his body connected each movement with the previous had you staring for too long. You snapped out of the trance he put you in unknowingly and softly opened the door.

The music quickly filled your ears as soon as you entered. It was almost too loud for you. These soundproof walls must be really good.

Jimin didn’t notice you enter the room. His movements were growing sloppy as his body became tired. Soon, he was collapsing onto the floor. His back was pressed into the floor, eyes closed as he breathed heavily. His lips were ajar, chest rising and falling quickly, and his hair was messily perfect. How could that be?

The next song played directly after the previous one and Jimin still hadn’t moved. You silently took a breath before making your way to his phone that was plugged in. You had thought the sounds of your footsteps would alert Jimin, but it didn’t. Despite the loud music probably silencing your footsteps, you found this odd since he was usually on alert regardless. You slid the volume down, but not completely turning it off. You were nervous if it were too silent, he would be able to hear your pounding heart. A part of you felt a little better about the soon-conversation when you noticed you were still his lock screen. That had to mean he didn’t want to give up on this, right? He hadn’t moved on already.

As soon as the volume adjusted, Jimin’s eyes were open and he was moving his body to see who was in the room with him. He was so out of it, you noticed. His eyes were darker than usual, the shine in them absent.

You both were silent for a moment— simply staring at me another as the music continued to play in the background.

Here it goes.

You put his phone gently as you sat down, back resting against the wall. You figured the distance was good for you both, despite the small craving you had to feel his skin on yours.

“I think we should talk,” you said, hating the way your voice came out quieter than expected. Jimin repositioned himself so he was no longer laying down. He ran his hand through his damp hair as he took in a deep breath.

“I think so, too,” he replied. His voice seemed raspier as if he hasn’t used his voice in a while. Although you wanted him to lead the conversation, you knew you needed to get everything out first. Your unspoken words were long overdue.

“I thought I was going to be okay with you and Yun Hee after we talked on that bench,” you started. You figured starting from the beginning was the best or perhaps you were dragging out this conversation in case it ended with you never speaking to each other. “I wasn’t though. Something about the two of you really got to me. I’m not even sure why,” you said sadly. You tore your gaze from him, finding it easier to talk to him without looking at him. Jimin stayed silent as he let you continue.

“I overheard your talk with Mrs. Seung the other day,” you confessed. “How she thinks I’m a bad influence on your future. I guess I am a negative influence considering this whole weekend’s mess was caused by my childish behavior,” you didn’t want to fish for reassurance. You knew you were being unreasonable. You quickly tried to move on in case he tried to say differently.

“When you ate breakfast with Yun Hee, I was really upset. I felt as if you replaced me with her since you had just offered to take me out to breakfast. Seeing you with her when it was about to be me with you, was hurtful. It hurt me,” you continued, starting to play with the hem of your shirt out of nervousness. Jimin hadn’t said anything still. You peeked up to see if he was listening. His eyes were still on yours. His eyes appeared softer than before and his facial expression didn’t seem as tense. He nodded to let you know he was paying attention and wanted you to continue. And so you did.

“I know you said breakfast wasn’t planned— for both me and Yun Hee, but I just felt you should’ve declined and offered to just practice instead. I know how selfish that sounds now,” you said. “Tae had talked to me at the cabin about us, and at first I didn’t want to agree with what he said, I realized he was right. I was being hypocritical about many things. I shouldn’t have been upset about you practicing with Yun Hee when I was practicing with Jungkook. I shouldn’t have gotten mad when you invited Yun Hee to Tae’s cabin when I invited Jungkook.”

You wanted to include Jungkook and others, but you knew that wasn’t the point. The point wasn’t that you invited extra people, it was the fact you invited Jungkook when you knew Jimin wasn’t fond of him.

“This whole thing has been eating at my mind since Wednesday. I was finally going to talk to you yesterday, but when I came to your and Yun Hee’s practice,” you trailed off. You felt that tightness in your chest that told you you were going to cry. You didn’t want to, though. You didn’t want to cry. You breathed in deeply before continuing. “I saw how close you two were— physically close. I saw your faces getting closer.” Although you never saw if their lips met, they were so near it was bound to happen. Were you willing to forgive him if he did kiss her?

“I never believed you were a cheater, which is silly to say since I’ve been acting so jealous and petty, but I still have to know. Did you kiss her?” You asked, forcing the words out of your mouth. You looked up at him as you awaited his answer. The only hint of emotion came from the twitch in the corner of his lips.

“No,” he replied— simply and matter-of-fact. “I did not kiss Yun Hee.” He paused, his mouth staying open as if he was debating on what to say next. He let out a sigh, running his fingers through his hair again and briefly dropping his gaze from yours for the first time.

“I thought about it,” he replied truthfully. His words pushed on your heart and you forgot to take a breath for a second. “I hate saying that,” he admitted and he raised his eyes to yours again. You could tell he was forcing himself to look into your eyes.

“People say it’s the heat of the moment a lot, but it truly was. My emotions were scattered and I didn’t know how to pick them up and put them back together. I felt utterly lost,” he continued. “But I knew it wasn’t you. I knew Yun Hee wanted it, but when I saw her lips weren’t the same shape as yours-- when I saw they weren’t your lips, I stopped her. I’ve never cheated on you, Y/N. I’ve never got close to it until then. And I’m so sorry about that. I know my mixed emotions are not an excuse”

You watched his eyes slowly become shiny from the water gathering in them. He blinked once, then several more times in succession. He wasn’t afraid to cry in front of you, but he didn’t want you to feel sorry for him.

“I know I didn’t kiss her, but just the fact I considered it, makes me feel like I cheated on you.”

While you couldn’t prove if he truly didn’t kiss her, his expression was so raw that you felt his truthfulness through his eyes. It did hurt to know he contemplated it, though. While you found Jungkook attractive and had some moments of gentle touches, you never considered kissing him.

“Do you want to be with her?” You asked quietly. Did he only stop because he knew he was still in a relationship? Not because it wasn’t you, but because it wasn’t his girlfriend— in general.

“No,” he replied without hesitation. “No, baby, I don’t. I want to be with you.”

“How did we get here?” You questioned, more to yourself than to him. Although you felt this was mainly your fault, you still wondered why Jimin never offered more reassurance. Everyone could see your somber expressions lately, so surely he noticed as well. Was he growing tired of your jealousy? Was he growing tired of you? If so, why did he just say he wanted to be with you?

As if he were reading your mind, he replied, “I felt hopeless. I felt anything I would say would make things worse. I could tell how upset you were, but I couldn’t find myself doing anything about it. Jungkook was always there with you or Yoongi, and I used that as an excuse to not confront you.”

“I know how stupid that sounds, but I didn’t want to hurt you more. And I know inviting Yun Hee didn’t help our situation. I confess that was solely out of spite for you inviting Jungkook, which was wrong, I know,” he sighed. “I know you didn’t just invite him, either, but I felt as though you wanted to spend more time with him instead of me. You had been spending so much time together, more than me and Yun Hee, and it got me worried about what was going on between you two.”

You took in his words, trying to open your mind to view things from his perspective. You wanted to reply that you and Kook were practicing so much because you were extremely stressed about failing the assignment-- you needed all the practice you could get. Though this wasn’t the time to defend yourself. It was his turn to voice his concerns.

“Ironically,” he said with a chuckle, albeit there was nothing humorous about it. “I saw you two yesterday practicing. Well, actually, I’m not sure what you two were doing. The lights were off and you were both close,” he said, slight confusion in his voice. Ironic indeed you thought. Was the universe trying to tell you both that you’re both dumb? Probably.

“Did you kiss him?” He returned the question after a few seconds of silence.

“No,” you said. “I-“ Never came close to. “We were just talking. Jungkook’s friend, Hoseok, said we needed a better connection for the midterm. Even Mrs. Seung said the connection was important, so we were just doing that- building our connection.”

He watched you closely. You could tell he was analyzing for any signs of lies. From the way his shoulders relaxed, you knew he believed you.

“About the conversation between me and Mrs. Seung,” he started. “I don’t agree with her. I don’t think you’re holding me back. If anything, you motivate me to work harder. You make me want to be better in all aspects of life— as a person, in my passions, in anything I create. I want to be better for you.”

Your heart tightened again, but it was different this time. You felt like crying but not out of sadness. You were touched by his words. Throughout your two years together, he never spoke to you about this. He would mention wanting to do better, but he never said the reason. You had just guessed it was because he was a perfectionist.

“Because of you,” he finished slowly.

Silence fell over you two again. You felt as if there was more you wanted to say, but you couldn’t put your finger on it. You wanted to get all your thoughts out since this was the time.

“I think we were too focused on the midterm that it took over our lives. It blinded us from seeing what we needed,” he paused. His eyes were stuck on yours and your moving hands suddenly stilled. You didn’t realize you were playing with your shirt this entire time.

“Each other,” he finished. Although this was supposed to be a touching moment, you couldn’t help the small snort that escaped. You squealed slightly in embarrassment and covered your mouth, looking away from his face to try to hide your expression.

“A-achoo” You fake-sneezed, lamely attending to cover your laugh. Jimin tilted his head at you, the corner of his lips dipping downward.

“Did you just laugh at me?” He scoffed, though there was a teasing tone hinting.

“No. I agree. We need each other,” you said and nodded dramatically. You forced your lips downwards to keep the small smile from forming.

“You know that was meant to be a very caring moment,” he hummed, standing up and walking to move closer to you.

“I know,” you argued. “I can’t help if I sneeze at the wrong time.”

He shook his head in disbelief. “Bless you then.”

Your eyes followed Jimin as he became close enough to touch. He sat back down, legs in a straddle as he stared at you.

“Thank you,” you said as you felt your body grow hot from the need to be closer to him. You never craved his touch this badly before. You felt guilty for wanting him when you were still having a meaningful conversation.

“You weren’t supposed to laugh,” he pouted. The urge to tug on his bottom lip was strong.

“I couldn’t help it,” you caved. “It was so cheesy. But cute,” you added the last part quickly.

“Maybe so, but it’s true. I need you, jagiya,” he said. Fuck, did his voice just lower? Your thoughts were no longer on Yun Hee or Jungkook or the midterm. You simply wanted your boyfriend.

“Come here, baby,” he continued softly, patting the spot in front of him. You didn’t hesitate to move toward him. You wrapped your legs around his waist, fitting perfectly between his legs. Your arms instantly wrapped around his neck while he circled your waist.

It wasn’t long before his plump lips crashed onto yours. The kiss wasn’t as soft as you were expecting. He was moving his lips fiercely against yours. It felt as though he was making up for the lost time. As if he was about to be taken from you and this was his last chance to kiss you.

However, you didn’t mind.

You matched his pace, quickly finding your fingers in his locks. He hummed in content as he pressed you closer to him— if that was possible.

You jumped and pulled away from the kiss when you felt the coldness from his rings on your bare lower back. He simply chuckled, rubbing circles against your warm, smooth skin.

“I’ve missed you,” you said and ran your fingers through his hair gently. He smiled widely at you, giving you a squeeze, before answering.

“I’ve missed you, too. I’m sorry for not coming to talk to you when you were so upset. I should’ve reassured you and made you feel at ease.”

You nodded, accepting his apology. “I’m sorry I got so jealous. I trust you, I do, I just got too caught up in my insecurities. I was so scared you’d lose me for someone better. Someone that makes your future more successful.”

Jimin's hand began rubbing up and down on your sides in comfort, trying to let you know he was there for you.

“Let’s go on a date tonight,” he said. You raised your eyebrows. It’s been at least a month since your last date. You weren’t opposed to going on a date, but you were not expecting him to suggest this.

“Really?” You asked.

“Is that a no?” He teased, leaning forward to press his lips right under your jawline.

“I’ll go on a date with you,” you giggled when he kissed the spot just behind your ear. For some reason, that spot was always ticklish.

“I missed that,” Jimin said softly and pulled away from you. Suddenly, your and Jimin’s phone dinged. You went to pull out your phone from your pocket, but Jimin’s hand rested on yours to stop you.

“Focus on me,” he pleaded. You leaned down and pecked his lips.

“I will after I check. Maybe it’s our grades,” you replied, eager to see how you and Kook did.

“But I want your attention only on me,” he whined, leaning onto your chest. You quickly felt his lips kiss the top curve of one of your breasts through your shirt. “Y/N,” he whined into your body, continuing his attack of kisses on you. They were trailing from your chest to your collarbone to your neck and down again.

Despite his pleas, you took out your phone. You placed your arms around Jimin’s neck again and rested your arms on his shoulders, viewing your screen from behind his head.

An email motivation from Mrs. Seung.

You took a deep breath and clicked the notification, entering your passcode before waiting for the screen to load. Jimin’s kisses traveled back up to your neck. You couldn’t deny that it was getting harder to focus with Jimin buried in the crook of your neck— licking, sucking, and biting your skin.

The screen loaded and your eyes scanned the beginning of the message.

Everyone should be proud of themselves. You all learned the routine quicker than expected and all came up with unique partner sections.

I was impressed.

Next class, we will continue on technique and freestyle to get prepared for your final. You will be able to select the partner of your choice. Choose wisely since your final counts for 75% of your overall grade.

Below you will be you and your partner's score for your midterm. Reminder there will be no grade changes.

Y/L/N Y/N and Jeon Jungkook

Passing. You got a passing score. It wasn’t as high as you wanted, but considering she was grading your performance harder than the rest, you felt proud.

“Yes!” You exclaimed, which had Jimin pulling away slightly to look at your cheerful face.

“What’d you get, baby?” He asked, holding your back securely as he leaned forward to grab his phone. He quickly typed in his password and went to his email.

“I got an 88! Not as good as I wanted, but I’ll take it. She was grading us harder than the rest, so an 88 is like an A, right?” You questioned happily. Jimin gave you a wide smile, the light tone of your voice making him happy.

“You did so well today,” he praised and pressed his lips to yours softly.

“You did, too,” you compliment back, and you mean it. Oddly, the thought of Yun Hee dancing with him didn’t make your blood boil anymore-- perhaps just a slight simmer instead. You felt more at ease despite thinking of them together. Although it did hurt to know he considered kissing her, you were grateful he was honest with you. You were also glad he didn’t kiss her because of you, despite the rocky situation you were both in. He stayed loyal. “I’m always so mesmerized by watching you.”

He laughed bashfully and bowed his head to his phone, partly because he was reading the email and the other part from being shy from your compliment.

As he was reading the email, you texted Jungkook about your grade. You suddenly thought about how he would feel about Jungkook now. Even though you felt more at peace with Yun Hee, you wanted Jimin to feel the same about Jungkook. However, you weren’t sure what you would do if he wasn’t. You couldn’t just stop talking to Jungkook because Jimin didn’t like him. Could you? Would Jimin do that if you requested he not spend time with Yun Hee?

The circle would keep going. You shook your head at that. It couldn’t keep going. You decided there that you trusted Jimin. More so now than ever. If he wanted to hang out with Yun Hee, you trusted him to stay loyal to you.

“How’s your score?” You asked when he didn’t say anything for a while.

“It’s good,” he replied vaguely. You hid your frown at his answer.

“That doesn’t sound good,” you said. “Tell me. I’m sure you did great.”

He locked his phone and slid it back to where it was. “I got a 99. You know how Mrs. Seung is about giving out 100s.”

Your eyebrows knitted in confusion at his words. He didn’t seem that happy about it. “Is there something wrong? A 99 is great, Jimin,” you said.

“Yeah, I’m happy, I just…” he trailed off. “I didn’t want you to be upset.”

“Why would I be upset?” You asked and placed your phone on the side.

“I know you wanted a higher score and-“

“That doesn’t mean I would be upset by you getting a higher score than me. I expected you would. She really likes you,” you said reassuringly. “And you should tell me things even if you think they’ll upset me.”

“I’m working on it,” he replied with a small smile.

“Good,” you said. “Congrats on your high score, ChimChim.” You gave him another quick kiss. If it were possible, you would give him a kiss every second of the day. You loved the way his soft lips felt against yours.

“Thank you,” he murmured happily.

“I do have one question though,” you said. “How do you feel about me talking to Jungkook still?”

You were nervous about his answer since he seemed to really dislike Jungkook. He sighed and took a moment to think.

“I think I’m okay,” he replied thoughtfully. “I’m not entirely thrilled about it, but I trust you and I can’t force you to stop talking to someone.”

“Or hanging out with them?” You added cautiously.

“Or hanging out with them,” he replied. “How do you feel about me and Yun Hee?”

Him and Yun Hee. You didn’t like the way that was phrased, but you supposed it was because it was still a sensitive topic. You were more at ease, but it was easy to fall back into those dark thoughts.

“Like you, I’m not overjoyed, but I can’t do anything about it but accept it. I trust you,” you said. “I said that before and my actions showed otherwise, but I’m going to prove I actually mean it. I trust you, Park Jimin.”

“Even after what I did?” He questioned. His expression quickly became sorrowful.

“Sounds weird, but what you did kinda helped me trust you more. You were so close, but you stopped yourself,” you replied and began playing with his hair again, hoping it would calm him. “You had control over your actions and you admitted to what you thought instead of hiding it.”

“Aren’t you worried that since I felt those emotions, it would be easy to feel them again?” He replied. He didn’t want you to doubt him, but the guilt of his cheating thoughts had him doubting himself. He was nervous those feelings would arise again. Not just for Yun Hee, but for any other girl who got close. He never wanted to betray you and he was determined to do so. He wouldn’t allow himself to come close to those feelings.

“That’s true,” you admitted. “But I’m trusting you to not feel that way again. No matter the situation we are in. I’m hoping we will disclose our true feelings earlier and talk them out.”

Jimin let your words sink in as you continued to play with his hair.

“I love you,” he said. His voice sounded desperate as if he was worried you wouldn’t say it back. He was nervous you had fallen out of love with him. He was nervous he was going to lose you despite everything you just said. Your hands slowed at his pleading expression.

“I’m not going anywhere,” you soothed. “I love you more.”

“I promise I’ll confide in you more. I’ll make sure you never have a reason to go,” he whispered as he hovered his lips on yours. You could feel the subtle brush of his lips as he spoke.

“Never?” You questioned playfully. He hummed as he moved closer.

“Yeah, you’re stuck with me. Didn’t you know that?” He replied, lips barely pressed to yours.

“Maybe you should remind me,” you said teasingly.

“That’s my girl,” he muttered before closing the space between you.

Minutes went by easily when you were with Jimin. As cliche as it is, your heart felt whole when you were around him. You hoped this conversation dulled the pain from this weekend for good and that if it ever happened again, you would both learn from your mistakes. You learned staying away from Jimin took a toll on you that was troublesome. You never wanted to experience that again.

“Let’s go,” Jimin said, lips swollen and barely out of breath despite your long kissing session. “We got a date to attend to.”

You giggled in reply, offering him one more kiss before removing yourself from his lap and tucking your phone in your back pocket. As you watched him gather his personal items, you realized how much he meant to you. Despite the dark times, you were both growing with each other. You were discovering what worked for both of you. You were also noticing more small things that he does without knowing like pouting when he is in deep concentration. Not to mention that you could listen to his soothing voice all day.

Park Jimin was truly unique in every aspect.

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